1 00:00:07,084 --> 00:00:09,334 警告:本節目為強制收看 2 00:00:09,334 --> 00:00:11,918 違者一律罰五百點 3 00:00:13,418 --> 00:00:15,043 (伊甸影業出品) 4 00:00:15,543 --> 00:00:20,126 他們來自另一個空間 在我們的世界興風作浪 5 00:00:20,126 --> 00:00:22,709 但其中一個不滿足於此 6 00:00:23,918 --> 00:00:24,751 嗨! 7 00:00:24,751 --> 00:00:26,876 歡迎收看《雷曼秀》 8 00:00:27,793 --> 00:00:28,793 (外星人回家去!) 9 00:00:28,793 --> 00:00:31,501 小子,沒人想在電視上看到怪物 10 00:00:31,501 --> 00:00:34,584 我跟大家不一樣 也許可以帶來新氣象 11 00:00:34,584 --> 00:00:35,543 (傳奇的誕生) 12 00:00:35,543 --> 00:00:39,543 看伊甸人氣偶像的崛起和奮鬥 13 00:00:40,043 --> 00:00:42,876 我只是想娛樂大家,給大家希望 14 00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:44,209 給大家夢想 15 00:00:44,209 --> 00:00:46,209 雷曼就是雷曼 16 00:00:46,876 --> 00:00:48,543 請收看《希望之光》 17 00:00:48,543 --> 00:00:50,293 雷曼的故事 18 00:00:50,793 --> 00:00:53,876 本週五伊甸所有裝置全面上映 19 00:00:57,293 --> 00:00:59,084 警告:本節目為強制收看 20 00:00:59,084 --> 00:01:01,001 違者一律罰... 21 00:01:05,418 --> 00:01:08,168 打擾了,多米,要喝茶嗎? 22 00:01:11,501 --> 00:01:13,334 該死的蒲甘明! 23 00:01:13,334 --> 00:01:15,668 你到底要藐視我多久? 24 00:01:15,668 --> 00:01:18,084 我已經等40分鐘了 25 00:01:20,293 --> 00:01:21,168 多米! 26 00:01:21,168 --> 00:01:23,876 多米妮可,我的朋友!真是抱歉 27 00:01:23,876 --> 00:01:27,584 我知道我們有約,但我完全忘了時間 28 00:01:27,584 --> 00:01:29,918 - 航程還順利嗎? - 你遲到了 29 00:01:29,918 --> 00:01:31,751 別這樣,多米,妳也知道狀況 30 00:01:31,751 --> 00:01:35,251 我知道你寧願屁股挨打也不想談正事 31 00:01:35,251 --> 00:01:37,709 對,我確實喜歡挨打 32 00:01:37,709 --> 00:01:40,001 - 你覺得這很好笑嗎? - 來了 33 00:01:40,001 --> 00:01:43,668 我失去了三名好手 才幫你拿到這個破銅爛鐵 34 00:01:43,668 --> 00:01:45,251 顯然還不夠好 35 00:01:48,751 --> 00:01:52,793 好了,沒必要這樣 我很遺憾妳失去了手下 36 00:01:52,793 --> 00:01:54,584 現在可以談正事了嗎? 37 00:01:55,251 --> 00:01:58,043 這應該會讓妳眉開眼笑 38 00:02:04,584 --> 00:02:05,543 你的玩具在這裡 39 00:02:08,126 --> 00:02:09,501 很好 40 00:02:09,501 --> 00:02:10,876 確實值得 41 00:02:11,501 --> 00:02:14,626 多米,跟妳交易真是愉快 42 00:02:16,418 --> 00:02:18,168 去你的 43 00:02:43,293 --> 00:02:46,668 蒲甘明!你不能這麼做 44 00:02:49,543 --> 00:02:50,459 不! 45 00:03:09,293 --> 00:03:14,876 雷射戰鷹隊長:血龍 Remix 46 00:03:29,168 --> 00:03:30,418 不要動 47 00:03:31,501 --> 00:03:34,209 把口袋裡的東西都給我 48 00:03:37,293 --> 00:03:39,876 這可不是每天都遇得到的事呢 49 00:03:39,876 --> 00:03:40,876 我說... 50 00:03:40,876 --> 00:03:43,251 嘿,放輕鬆 51 00:03:43,251 --> 00:03:45,084 哎呀,你的樣子真慘 52 00:03:46,751 --> 00:03:48,751 你叫什麼名字? 53 00:03:49,626 --> 00:03:50,584 多夫雷射戰鷹 54 00:03:51,209 --> 00:03:53,084 這是任務簡報 55 00:03:53,084 --> 00:03:55,626 給我全神貫注 56 00:03:55,626 --> 00:03:57,251 別再做白日夢了 57 00:03:58,293 --> 00:04:00,251 很好,再說一次 58 00:04:00,251 --> 00:04:04,251 這是黃金超級遙射砲 擁有強大能力的裝置 59 00:04:04,251 --> 00:04:06,584 可以開啟通往另一個空間的入口 60 00:04:06,584 --> 00:04:09,334 是從伊甸的研究實驗室偷來的 61 00:04:09,334 --> 00:04:13,293 我們相信目前是在 三合會的首腦蒲甘明手上 62 00:04:13,876 --> 00:04:14,709 那傢伙 63 00:04:14,709 --> 00:04:18,376 我一直想揭發他,他絕對是個瘋子 64 00:04:18,376 --> 00:04:21,626 沒錯,蒲甘明是徹頭徹尾的黑幫老大 65 00:04:21,626 --> 00:04:24,209 他喜歡暴力,喜歡在海灘上散步 66 00:04:24,209 --> 00:04:26,001 但他最喜歡的,是控制 67 00:04:26,001 --> 00:04:29,459 而且會毫不猶豫 使用最下流的手段掌控一切 68 00:04:29,459 --> 00:04:32,293 像是在人的腦袋裡裝炸彈? 69 00:04:36,251 --> 00:04:37,126 對 70 00:04:37,626 --> 00:04:41,834 所以,你們的任務 是潛入蒲甘明的地盤 71 00:04:41,834 --> 00:04:44,751 關閉安全系統,解決守衛 72 00:04:44,751 --> 00:04:47,626 進入他位於塔頂的私人空間 73 00:04:47,626 --> 00:04:51,459 蒲甘明的高塔是全市最大的地下賭場 74 00:04:51,459 --> 00:04:54,001 秘密對戰、妓女、毒品,應有盡有 75 00:04:54,584 --> 00:04:56,501 整座高塔戒備森嚴 76 00:04:56,501 --> 00:04:57,501 (任務1,選擇玩家) 77 00:04:57,501 --> 00:04:59,043 佩傑,你是前途看好的摔角手 78 00:04:59,043 --> 00:05:00,459 有個妖姬經紀人 79 00:05:01,084 --> 00:05:02,459 我不當妖姬 80 00:05:02,459 --> 00:05:04,168 - 妳要當 - 什麼?別這樣 81 00:05:04,168 --> 00:05:06,126 {\an8}牛蛙,你從下水道進去 82 00:05:06,126 --> 00:05:08,001 {\an8}對,我可以殺了他 83 00:05:08,001 --> 00:05:09,501 {\an8}不,蒲甘明不能死 84 00:05:09,501 --> 00:05:11,501 {\an8}不准動蒲甘明 85 00:05:11,501 --> 00:05:15,084 處理好安全系統 就換你上場了,雷射戰鷹 86 00:05:15,084 --> 00:05:18,668 在大廳找到遙射砲 用複製品偷天換日 87 00:05:18,668 --> 00:05:20,876 砰,進去出來乾淨俐落 88 00:05:20,876 --> 00:05:22,043 去吧 89 00:05:22,043 --> 00:05:23,168 記住了 90 00:05:23,168 --> 00:05:24,251 (典獄長的幽靈) 91 00:05:24,251 --> 00:05:25,334 你們是幽靈 92 00:05:25,334 --> 00:05:26,668 並不存在 93 00:05:29,168 --> 00:05:32,001 這是潔德在超級監獄牢房裡的報導 94 00:05:32,001 --> 00:05:33,209 第四天 95 00:05:33,793 --> 00:05:38,543 那個被稱為典獄長的女機械人 逼我們替她做見不得人的事 96 00:05:38,543 --> 00:05:41,251 這簡直就是隨時 會從我們的腦袋裡執行的死刑 97 00:05:41,251 --> 00:05:42,584 嘿,大家好! 98 00:05:42,584 --> 00:05:43,626 牛蛙 99 00:05:45,793 --> 00:05:47,751 這是超級遙射砲的複製品 100 00:05:47,751 --> 00:05:51,001 我們要拿去蒲甘明的高塔跟本尊交換 101 00:05:51,001 --> 00:05:53,751 雷射戰鷹 你對這次任務有什麼想法? 102 00:05:54,501 --> 00:05:56,126 好,你沒意見 103 00:05:57,209 --> 00:06:01,668 身為刺客,我覺得先殺了蒲甘明 104 00:06:01,668 --> 00:06:03,334 再偷超級遙射砲比較簡單 105 00:06:03,334 --> 00:06:06,043 可是老闆說不可以殺人 106 00:06:06,043 --> 00:06:07,084 我們就不殺... 107 00:06:07,084 --> 00:06:10,334 好了,嘿,佩傑,你好了嗎? 108 00:06:10,334 --> 00:06:12,543 - 佩傑? - 你們會笑我的 109 00:06:12,543 --> 00:06:15,584 - 我發誓我們不會笑你,對吧? - 對,我發誓 110 00:06:15,584 --> 00:06:17,209 - 好,雷射戰鷹? - 我不在乎 111 00:06:17,209 --> 00:06:18,668 他當然不在乎 112 00:06:18,668 --> 00:06:19,918 別糾結了,快出來 113 00:06:19,918 --> 00:06:21,709 好吧 114 00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:28,376 我完全不懂摔角 115 00:06:28,376 --> 00:06:31,168 為什麼我要這樣羞辱自己? 116 00:06:31,168 --> 00:06:34,459 因為我辦不到,她辦不到,他不願意 117 00:06:34,459 --> 00:06:37,376 而原本應該做這件事的人已經慘死了 118 00:06:37,376 --> 00:06:40,584 天啊,可憐的柯迪羅德,死得真慘 119 00:06:40,584 --> 00:06:41,834 各位,幫我一個忙 120 00:06:41,834 --> 00:06:44,376 萬一典獄長把我的頭炸了 拜託不要看 121 00:06:44,376 --> 00:06:45,459 不好笑 122 00:06:45,459 --> 00:06:47,376 什麼?我們面對現實吧 123 00:06:47,376 --> 00:06:49,709 夾在蒲甘明和瘋子小姐之間 124 00:06:49,709 --> 00:06:52,209 我們活下去的機會微乎其微 125 00:06:52,209 --> 00:06:54,001 別再說了! 126 00:06:54,584 --> 00:06:57,084 我在妳父母的墳前發誓 127 00:06:57,084 --> 00:06:59,834 無論如何我都會守護妳,我會辦到的 128 00:06:59,834 --> 00:07:02,084 好啦,冷靜點 129 00:07:02,084 --> 00:07:05,834 你一直在我身邊,佩傑 我知道,好嗎? 130 00:07:07,126 --> 00:07:10,543 你說得對,我們遇過更棘手的情況 131 00:07:11,251 --> 00:07:14,584 我們會度過這個難關的,一起 132 00:07:15,959 --> 00:07:18,334 對,一起 133 00:07:19,126 --> 00:07:22,043 各位幽靈,五分鐘後出發 134 00:07:22,043 --> 00:07:23,334 潔德,妳的衣服呢? 135 00:07:23,334 --> 00:07:26,459 我的衣服? 喔,我想我穿這樣就可以了 136 00:07:26,459 --> 00:07:30,001 妳不需要想,潔德 妳只要聽從命令就可以了 137 00:07:30,001 --> 00:07:31,959 我不會再說同樣的話了 138 00:07:31,959 --> 00:07:33,876 給我閉嘴,去穿好衣服 139 00:07:40,459 --> 00:07:42,668 我不當妖姬 140 00:07:42,668 --> 00:07:47,376 我可以做很多事 但是妖姬?我才不幹 141 00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:50,293 我覺得妳這樣很漂亮 142 00:07:51,418 --> 00:07:52,543 是啊 143 00:07:55,459 --> 00:07:56,501 潔德? 144 00:07:57,001 --> 00:07:59,543 剛剛的事,我真的很抱歉 145 00:07:59,543 --> 00:08:00,959 我覺得我會失控 146 00:08:00,959 --> 00:08:03,501 是因為我們的腦袋裡有炸彈 147 00:08:03,501 --> 00:08:04,709 我也不知道 148 00:08:04,709 --> 00:08:06,209 好了,沒關係 149 00:08:06,793 --> 00:08:09,584 - 很多事都讓我們神經兮兮 - 對,當然 150 00:08:09,584 --> 00:08:12,918 但這讓我想了想 151 00:08:13,959 --> 00:08:15,209 想什麼? 152 00:08:16,251 --> 00:08:20,043 我想...我對妳有感覺 153 00:08:20,918 --> 00:08:22,334 什麼?不 154 00:08:22,334 --> 00:08:24,251 不行 155 00:08:24,251 --> 00:08:26,959 我是說,你是我叔叔,不是親叔叔 156 00:08:26,959 --> 00:08:28,459 但還是叔叔,你? 157 00:08:28,459 --> 00:08:29,918 兩位,輪到你們了 158 00:08:29,918 --> 00:08:30,834 該死! 159 00:08:30,834 --> 00:08:33,709 好,去執行任務吧 160 00:08:43,834 --> 00:08:45,751 - 喂? - 潔德,妳不用開口 161 00:08:45,751 --> 00:08:47,709 - 好 - 你們就位了嗎? 162 00:08:47,709 --> 00:08:49,876 對,應該是吧 163 00:08:49,876 --> 00:08:51,043 現在發揮妳的專長 164 00:08:51,043 --> 00:08:54,043 弄到一張第一警衛室的鑰匙卡 165 00:08:54,043 --> 00:08:55,293 辦得到嗎? 166 00:08:55,876 --> 00:08:57,959 我的專長,好 167 00:08:57,959 --> 00:09:00,334 抱歉 168 00:09:01,126 --> 00:09:02,043 該死 169 00:09:04,376 --> 00:09:05,751 嘿 170 00:09:06,334 --> 00:09:07,709 {\an8}勾引他 171 00:09:09,001 --> 00:09:11,084 {\an8}有個帥氣的大貓在看我 172 00:09:11,709 --> 00:09:14,459 {\an8}但現在我只是個普通客人 173 00:09:14,959 --> 00:09:18,501 {\an8}我要怎麼用性感妖姬的方式 吸引他的注意? 174 00:09:20,084 --> 00:09:21,584 {\an8}靠,我不知道 175 00:09:21,584 --> 00:09:23,543 {\an8}(你帶了槍,還是見到我太興奮?) 176 00:09:23,543 --> 00:09:24,459 {\an8}選這個? 177 00:09:24,459 --> 00:09:25,376 {\an8}(“大吼”) 178 00:09:25,376 --> 00:09:27,043 {\an8}嘿,虎人,吼 179 00:09:27,043 --> 00:09:28,543 {\an8}希望你懂我的意思 180 00:09:30,084 --> 00:09:32,459 {\an8}首先,獅子才吼 181 00:09:32,459 --> 00:09:34,709 {\an8}其次,這是物種歧視 182 00:09:35,584 --> 00:09:38,543 {\an8}(“酷!我超愛貓科動物的!” “我可以摸你的毛嗎?”) 183 00:09:38,543 --> 00:09:39,584 {\an8}隨便啦 184 00:09:39,584 --> 00:09:42,043 {\an8}帥哥,你有致癌棒嗎? 185 00:09:42,043 --> 00:09:43,043 {\an8}有啊 186 00:09:43,793 --> 00:09:44,709 {\an8}給妳 187 00:09:46,418 --> 00:09:47,668 {\an8}可以幫我點一下嗎? 188 00:09:47,668 --> 00:09:50,418 {\an8}我很想,但妳的菸放顛倒了 189 00:09:51,543 --> 00:09:52,418 {\an8}我想... 190 00:09:52,918 --> 00:09:56,459 {\an8}好,我抽菸都是顛倒著來的,寶貝 191 00:09:57,001 --> 00:10:01,543 {\an8}就像...性愛一樣...吧 192 00:10:04,626 --> 00:10:06,084 (失敗) 193 00:10:08,543 --> 00:10:10,168 給你看看我的專長 194 00:10:13,543 --> 00:10:16,626 親愛的,你不能再喝了 195 00:10:20,834 --> 00:10:22,918 - 我進來了 - 很好 196 00:10:22,918 --> 00:10:26,418 警衛室應該在走廊的盡頭,左邊 197 00:10:26,418 --> 00:10:27,459 保持警覺 198 00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:30,918 知道了,我只希望這張權限卡可以... 199 00:10:44,209 --> 00:10:47,501 我只是想找洗... 200 00:10:54,209 --> 00:10:56,584 好,謝謝 201 00:11:01,834 --> 00:11:05,501 典獄長?我要把一樓 跟其他地方隔離開來 202 00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,584 很好,牛蛙,該你上場了 203 00:11:18,126 --> 00:11:19,084 我看看 204 00:11:29,876 --> 00:11:31,709 - 警報 - 這是怎麼回事? 205 00:11:31,709 --> 00:11:33,501 有人關閉了訊... 206 00:11:34,334 --> 00:11:35,418 警報 207 00:11:36,668 --> 00:11:39,376 好,完成,我要開門了 208 00:11:40,918 --> 00:11:42,418 雷射戰鷹,換你了 209 00:11:42,418 --> 00:11:44,584 也該是時候了 210 00:11:54,293 --> 00:11:55,334 我進來了 211 00:11:59,501 --> 00:12:00,334 找到了 212 00:12:00,334 --> 00:12:01,918 現在,動靜小一點 213 00:12:01,918 --> 00:12:05,209 用複製品取代超級遙射砲 就可以出來了 214 00:12:13,209 --> 00:12:14,751 不 215 00:12:20,251 --> 00:12:23,001 雷射戰鷹,你在做什麼? 216 00:12:23,001 --> 00:12:26,584 專心,重複,專心執行任務 217 00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:33,543 艾力克斯! 218 00:12:33,543 --> 00:12:34,626 雷射戰鷹,不要! 219 00:12:42,168 --> 00:12:45,293 哎呀,這是什麼人啊? 220 00:12:45,293 --> 00:12:46,959 我錯了就糾正我,艾力克斯 221 00:12:46,959 --> 00:12:50,543 你那個瘋狂的前女友不是死了嗎? 222 00:12:51,126 --> 00:12:53,459 對,他應該死了才對 223 00:12:53,459 --> 00:12:58,376 真是要命,其他幽靈 中止任務,立刻中止任務 224 00:12:58,376 --> 00:13:00,293 我是很想啦 225 00:13:01,793 --> 00:13:03,251 我... 226 00:13:03,251 --> 00:13:04,918 好極了 227 00:13:11,501 --> 00:13:14,876 我很自豪自己是個有禮貌的人 228 00:13:14,876 --> 00:13:17,251 但這個禮拜 我已經讓人壞了兩次好事了 229 00:13:18,834 --> 00:13:23,001 所以至少也應該告訴我原因吧 230 00:13:23,001 --> 00:13:25,168 不,別管那個了 231 00:13:25,168 --> 00:13:28,793 是誰?誰派你們來偷我的東西? 232 00:13:38,709 --> 00:13:40,584 怎麼了,帥哥? 233 00:13:41,084 --> 00:13:42,626 我說了什麼好笑的話嗎? 234 00:13:43,834 --> 00:13:47,918 艾力克斯,我以為 背後捅我一刀已經夠惡劣的了 235 00:13:47,918 --> 00:13:50,876 沒想到你會這麼作賤自己 236 00:13:57,168 --> 00:13:59,293 你知道嗎?你說得對 237 00:14:00,334 --> 00:14:02,543 他真的很有個性 238 00:14:02,543 --> 00:14:05,126 艾力克斯把你的事都告訴我了 239 00:14:05,126 --> 00:14:09,918 你在巨大市4的同志酒吧外打人 240 00:14:09,918 --> 00:14:15,959 還是個怕丟臉不敢出櫃 自欺欺人的小酷兒 241 00:14:15,959 --> 00:14:18,584 拜託,開槍吧 242 00:14:18,584 --> 00:14:22,418 我寧願死也不想再看你一分鐘 243 00:14:26,293 --> 00:14:27,126 不 244 00:14:30,501 --> 00:14:32,459 潔德? 245 00:14:32,459 --> 00:14:34,501 不,妳說話啊,寶貝 246 00:14:35,001 --> 00:14:36,334 跟我說話,潔德! 247 00:14:41,751 --> 00:14:44,668 殺想死的人有什麼意思呢? 248 00:14:44,668 --> 00:14:46,209 我說得對嗎? 249 00:14:46,209 --> 00:14:48,834 我要把你的心挖出來 250 00:14:48,834 --> 00:14:51,334 少來,你知道你不會的,親愛的 251 00:14:51,334 --> 00:14:53,834 我說到哪裡了?對了 252 00:14:53,834 --> 00:14:56,084 說吧,誰派你們來的? 253 00:14:57,793 --> 00:14:58,668 典獄長? 254 00:14:59,376 --> 00:15:00,376 什麼? 255 00:15:01,376 --> 00:15:04,334 - 潔德的炸彈,來吧 - 什麼?不! 256 00:15:04,334 --> 00:15:05,584 聽到沒有? 257 00:15:05,584 --> 00:15:07,209 把她的頭炸掉! 258 00:15:07,793 --> 00:15:09,251 這是什麼鬼東西? 259 00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:18,876 吃我一拳,王八蛋! 260 00:15:26,001 --> 00:15:29,043 守衛,認真點,攔住這些混蛋! 261 00:15:48,334 --> 00:15:50,834 寶貝!寶貝,我中槍了,幫幫我! 262 00:15:50,834 --> 00:15:52,626 幫幫我,寶貝,拜託! 263 00:15:58,668 --> 00:15:59,501 艾力克斯! 264 00:16:38,834 --> 00:16:41,376 艾力克斯?為什麼? 265 00:16:45,459 --> 00:16:47,251 你這個人渣 266 00:16:47,834 --> 00:16:48,834 不,不行 267 00:16:48,834 --> 00:16:51,959 佩傑,記得我說的嗎?蒲甘明不能死 268 00:16:51,959 --> 00:16:54,418 你能至少完成 這次任務中的一件事嗎? 269 00:16:54,418 --> 00:16:57,376 就算這是我做的最後一件事也無所謂 270 00:16:57,376 --> 00:16:59,584 他要付出代價 271 00:16:59,584 --> 00:17:03,001 大哥,你冷靜點,以牙還牙不是辦法 272 00:17:06,501 --> 00:17:08,084 放開我,青蛙 273 00:17:09,043 --> 00:17:10,751 我是為了你好 274 00:17:11,793 --> 00:17:12,793 放開他 275 00:17:16,418 --> 00:17:19,459 雷射戰鷹,我最後警告你,如果你... 276 00:17:19,459 --> 00:17:20,834 妳會怎麼做? 277 00:17:21,334 --> 00:17:22,293 把我們全都殺了? 278 00:17:23,918 --> 00:17:24,793 青蛙 279 00:17:25,668 --> 00:17:26,626 放開他 280 00:17:33,168 --> 00:17:36,126 不!拜託不要! 281 00:17:36,793 --> 00:17:37,668 不要! 282 00:18:39,959 --> 00:18:42,251 你們確定要這麼做嗎? 283 00:18:42,918 --> 00:18:44,793 非常確定 284 00:18:45,418 --> 00:18:46,251 先生 285 00:18:46,251 --> 00:18:47,209 很好 286 00:18:49,459 --> 00:18:53,209 因為我不會給你們錢、魅力或名聲 287 00:18:54,918 --> 00:18:58,418 你們來,是因為你們受夠了被當垃圾 288 00:18:59,251 --> 00:19:03,459 是因為你們的社會地位、性別、出身 289 00:19:04,209 --> 00:19:07,543 你們來,是因為你們厭倦被伊甸利用 290 00:19:07,543 --> 00:19:10,334 或者被某個自大自戀的小人利用 291 00:19:12,126 --> 00:19:14,876 你們來,是因為你們想改變世界 292 00:19:16,209 --> 00:19:17,251 你們猜怎麼著? 293 00:19:17,793 --> 00:19:22,001 要先把世界夷為平地 這個世界才會改變 294 00:19:22,584 --> 00:19:24,209 這就是我要給你們的 295 00:19:27,418 --> 00:19:28,334 混亂 296 00:20:45,168 --> 00:20:47,209 字幕翻譯:鄭淑芬