1
00:36:54,027 --> 00:37:00,116
I felt like I couldn't face the situation, accepting that my child is depressed.

2
00:37:02,035 --> 00:37:05,205
I was worried that once I admitted that she was sick,

3
00:37:05,288 --> 00:37:07,624
she would just keep being sick forever.

4
00:37:07,707 --> 00:37:12,420
That's why I delayed taking her to the doctor.

5
00:37:12,503 --> 00:37:16,257
I was worried that it would become a long-term problem.

6
00:37:16,883 --> 00:37:19,636
Her sister said she needed to see a doctor.

7
00:37:19,719 --> 00:37:21,846
That's how we finally faced the problem.

8
00:38:35,044 --> 00:38:39,382
I still have to learn how to deal with it.

9
00:38:40,466 --> 00:38:43,386
Especially when I don't know how to communicate with you.

10
00:38:43,469 --> 00:38:45,138
Or when you don't want to talk about it.

11
00:38:45,221 --> 00:38:49,267
Or when you say you're fine, but I feel you're not fine.

12
00:38:49,350 --> 00:38:52,270
Usually we just hug each other and cry. Then just--

13
00:38:52,353 --> 00:38:52,812
Okay.

14
00:38:52,896 --> 00:38:55,565
But the problem is still there.

15
00:38:57,525 --> 00:39:01,112
Every time you talk to her, you want to solve the problem,

16
00:39:01,196 --> 00:39:03,656
You want to make sure she's happy.

17
00:39:09,621 --> 00:39:13,625
to let out her emotions, to share her emotions.

18
00:39:33,311 --> 00:39:37,649
You're reminding me that I had similar struggles.

19
00:39:37,732 --> 00:39:39,359
Do you think we're similar?

20
00:39:44,614 --> 00:39:47,033
You never told me your story.

21
00:39:50,286 --> 00:39:53,665
People around me used to say I thought too much.

22
00:39:53,748 --> 00:39:55,667
"You think too much."

23
00:39:55,750 --> 00:39:57,544
"You own everything. Why do you think..."

24
00:39:57,627 --> 00:40:02,340
But still you feel empty inside.

25
00:40:04,342 --> 00:40:11,849
There was a lot of stress in my life, especially as an immigrant.

26
00:40:11,933 --> 00:40:13,601
I would just cry and cry in my car.

27
00:40:13,685 --> 00:40:18,898
It wasn't that I felt sad about anything. I just felt helpless.

28
00:40:18,982 --> 00:40:21,609
But I never told my children.

29
00:40:21,693 --> 00:40:30,243
I feel like it's so unfair to her.

30
00:40:30,326 --> 00:40:35,456
I'm the one who brought them here.

31
00:40:35,540 --> 00:40:37,834
I should have had everything set up for them.

32
00:40:37,917 --> 00:40:39,544
I should have given her a good life.

33
00:40:43,381 --> 00:40:46,509
Let me... wait a minute.

34
00:40:50,638 --> 00:40:55,435
I just feel like I'm not a mother who's able to help.

35
00:40:55,518 --> 00:40:57,437
I try to help but I can't.

36
00:40:57,520 --> 00:41:00,565
I really can't help her.

37
00:41:02,025 --> 00:41:05,403
I feel very guilty.

38
00:41:05,486 --> 00:41:13,578
I don't want you to think... that I don't care about you.

39
00:41:13,661 --> 00:41:22,754
But I didn't pay enough attention to what you were going through.

40
00:41:23,338 --> 00:41:27,342
Maybe we don't make progress after every conversation.

41
00:41:34,724 --> 00:41:37,352
we learn new things.

42
00:41:38,978 --> 00:41:43,733
I realize that she is much stronger than me.

43
00:41:43,816 --> 00:41:49,280
Crystal also encouraged me to go to therapy.