1 00:00:15,076 --> 00:00:16,076 Strap in, people. 2 00:00:17,576 --> 00:00:19,243 ♪ 3 00:00:25,643 --> 00:00:29,276 You know the chink in my armour. My Achilles’ heel. 4 00:00:29,309 --> 00:00:31,143 Delicious cheese. Delicious cheese. 5 00:00:31,176 --> 00:00:32,410 The delicious cheese sandwich! 6 00:00:32,443 --> 00:00:33,743 Sandwiches. Sandwiches. Delicious. 7 00:00:33,777 --> 00:00:34,743 Delicious cheese sandwich! 8 00:00:34,777 --> 00:00:36,977 Jon is holding on for dear life. 9 00:00:37,010 --> 00:00:37,977 He’s got a yellow card, doesn’t he? 10 00:00:38,010 --> 00:00:39,243 Yeah, he does have a yellow. 11 00:00:39,276 --> 00:00:46,043 It’s the delicious cheese sandwich! 12 00:00:46,076 --> 00:00:47,109 Done. 13 00:00:47,143 --> 00:00:48,443 And, scene. 14 00:00:48,476 --> 00:00:50,943 Atta boy Jon, wow! 15 00:00:50,977 --> 00:00:53,143 Uh... cheque please? 16 00:00:53,176 --> 00:00:56,777 [laughing] 17 00:00:56,810 --> 00:01:00,476 What would be the best meal to go with that? 18 00:01:00,510 --> 00:01:03,376 Don’t think about it too hard. You’re barely hanging on. 19 00:01:03,410 --> 00:01:04,743 [Debra] Oh my god. 20 00:01:04,777 --> 00:01:06,309 [laughing] 21 00:01:08,777 --> 00:01:11,676 [Colin] I could hear laughter from the other room 22 00:01:11,710 --> 00:01:13,176 {\an8}so I felt good that 23 00:01:13,209 --> 00:01:15,243 {\an8}the people who had already been eliminated 24 00:01:15,276 --> 00:01:16,810 {\an8}for being easy laughs were laughing. 25 00:01:16,843 --> 00:01:20,743 But the people I was aiming for, it didn’t seem to work. 26 00:01:20,777 --> 00:01:22,109 [sighs] 27 00:01:22,143 --> 00:01:24,843 Well done. That almost got me. 28 00:01:24,877 --> 00:01:26,176 Almost is not good enough. 29 00:01:27,376 --> 00:01:30,643 [clock beeps] 30 00:01:36,443 --> 00:01:37,610 Uh oh. 31 00:01:37,643 --> 00:01:38,510 Oh. 32 00:01:38,543 --> 00:01:39,510 What the hell is that? 33 00:01:39,543 --> 00:01:44,276 I am the Phantom of the Studio. 34 00:01:44,309 --> 00:01:47,376 {\an8}The situation was already pretty absurd at this point 35 00:01:47,410 --> 00:01:51,143 {\an8}and then, the, uh, Phantom of the Studio comes out. 36 00:01:51,176 --> 00:01:54,109 Which I was like, okay, okay. 37 00:01:54,143 --> 00:01:57,376 I’ve been watching each and every one of you. 38 00:01:57,410 --> 00:01:59,810 Watching you work. Watching you play. 39 00:02:01,777 --> 00:02:03,610 This shot... 40 00:02:03,643 --> 00:02:05,076 What the fuck is this? 41 00:02:05,109 --> 00:02:06,543 You know what this reminds me of? 42 00:02:06,576 --> 00:02:08,043 The interactive theatre. 43 00:02:08,076 --> 00:02:09,343 [laughing] 44 00:02:09,376 --> 00:02:11,176 I, I love this. 45 00:02:11,209 --> 00:02:15,343 Tom. Unbreakable. So far. 46 00:02:15,376 --> 00:02:17,610 They try over and over again. 47 00:02:17,643 --> 00:02:22,743 Unable to crack the man in here, you see. 48 00:02:24,176 --> 00:02:26,309 [laughing] 49 00:02:26,343 --> 00:02:28,743 - And over here, Jon! - Keep going. Keep going. 50 00:02:28,777 --> 00:02:31,376 Oh, I’ll be back. I’ll be back for much more. 51 00:02:31,410 --> 00:02:33,309 See ya at the wrap party. 52 00:02:33,343 --> 00:02:34,710 Oh my God. Oh my God. 53 00:02:34,743 --> 00:02:37,143 [laughing] 54 00:02:37,176 --> 00:02:38,643 Jon? 55 00:02:38,676 --> 00:02:40,176 Mmm hmm. 56 00:02:40,209 --> 00:02:42,510 Constantly unsure what will happen next. 57 00:02:42,543 --> 00:02:45,076 Will it be a caw-caw! 58 00:02:45,109 --> 00:02:46,977 That sets him off? 59 00:02:47,010 --> 00:02:49,543 You’ve got to admire the commitment, 60 00:02:49,576 --> 00:02:51,977 but I don’t understand what’s happening. 61 00:02:52,010 --> 00:02:53,476 Well, I have something for you. 62 00:02:53,510 --> 00:02:55,043 - [Jon] Mmm. - Uh oh. 63 00:02:55,076 --> 00:02:57,076 I have something I want to challenge you with. 64 00:02:57,109 --> 00:02:58,643 Should someone tell him he’s got something on his face? 65 00:03:00,010 --> 00:03:02,176 [laughing] 66 00:03:02,209 --> 00:03:06,676 I present to you the "Wheel of Trauma". 67 00:03:06,710 --> 00:03:08,143 Ooh. 68 00:03:08,176 --> 00:03:09,410 Take a spin of the wheel. 69 00:03:09,443 --> 00:03:12,343 I want to see what your trauma is. 70 00:03:12,376 --> 00:03:14,610 Take that trauma and perform 71 00:03:14,643 --> 00:03:17,076 that pain for this audience. 72 00:03:17,109 --> 00:03:20,109 Brandon... enter the arena. 73 00:03:20,143 --> 00:03:21,243 Okay. 74 00:03:25,543 --> 00:03:28,143 "Shit pants on first date." 75 00:03:28,176 --> 00:03:30,343 Jon, you’ve been there! 76 00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:31,843 Oh my God, yes. 77 00:03:31,877 --> 00:03:33,010 [Tom] Who hasn’t? 78 00:03:33,043 --> 00:03:35,109 I shit my pants thirty seconds ago. 79 00:03:35,143 --> 00:03:36,977 [laughing] 80 00:03:37,010 --> 00:03:39,276 The stage is yours, use it. 81 00:03:39,309 --> 00:03:44,043 This is such a fun date. 82 00:03:44,076 --> 00:03:46,710 Uh oh. Oh, oh. 83 00:03:46,743 --> 00:03:48,476 Act harder! 84 00:03:48,510 --> 00:03:52,010 Ah. I, I’m shitting. I’m, I’m shitting. 85 00:03:52,043 --> 00:03:54,543 No one ever announces that they’re shitting like that. 86 00:03:54,576 --> 00:03:55,743 I can’t stop shitting. 87 00:03:55,777 --> 00:03:57,643 Why are you shitting? Tell us! 88 00:03:57,676 --> 00:03:59,710 ’Cause my dad didn’t love me. 89 00:03:59,743 --> 00:04:02,476 Ah. Ah. Ah. 90 00:04:02,510 --> 00:04:03,743 And, scene. 91 00:04:03,777 --> 00:04:05,543 That was like a really edgy Hallmark. 92 00:04:05,576 --> 00:04:09,476 [laughing] 93 00:04:09,510 --> 00:04:10,510 Woo! 94 00:04:10,543 --> 00:04:12,410 {\an8}I gave quite the performance. 95 00:04:12,443 --> 00:04:16,510 {\an8}Okay. Oh, maybe I didn’t but, you know what? I tried, okay? 96 00:04:16,543 --> 00:04:19,143 Let’s see if a new game will break these guys. 97 00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:21,010 [phone rings] 98 00:04:23,543 --> 00:04:24,576 Hello? 99 00:04:24,610 --> 00:04:27,109 Ask everybody to get into a circle 100 00:04:27,143 --> 00:04:29,743 and you’re gonna take turns speaking one at a time 101 00:04:29,777 --> 00:04:32,043 but only in questions. 102 00:04:32,076 --> 00:04:34,109 I think it’s good news. 103 00:04:34,143 --> 00:04:35,676 [Jay] If anyone speaks in anything 104 00:04:35,710 --> 00:04:38,076 other than a question they gotta sit out in shame. 105 00:04:38,109 --> 00:04:39,376 Okay. 106 00:04:39,410 --> 00:04:41,043 Alright everyone get into a circle. 107 00:04:41,076 --> 00:04:42,376 - Okay. - [Tom] Get into a circle? 108 00:04:42,410 --> 00:04:44,309 - Okay. - Into a circle. 109 00:04:44,343 --> 00:04:46,977 We’re gonna do a game, you may have seen on an improv show, 110 00:04:47,010 --> 00:04:49,276 that you know, made me famous. 111 00:04:49,309 --> 00:04:51,443 Oh yeah, of course! I’m explaining the rules to him? 112 00:04:51,476 --> 00:04:53,209 [laughing] 113 00:04:53,243 --> 00:04:54,643 It’s like "So this is what you’re gonna do." 114 00:04:54,676 --> 00:04:56,743 Yeah. Colin, look Colin, just listen. Just listen. 115 00:04:56,777 --> 00:04:58,843 So you can only talk in questions. 116 00:04:58,877 --> 00:05:02,043 I’ll start. Did you see the size of the waves? 117 00:05:02,076 --> 00:05:05,376 Did you see the sun? 118 00:05:05,410 --> 00:05:09,209 I would... imagine... 119 00:05:09,243 --> 00:05:13,076 uh... that I would...know how to... ask a question? 120 00:05:13,109 --> 00:05:16,143 Yeah. I feel you kinda lost the whole question thing there. 121 00:05:16,176 --> 00:05:17,543 Yeah, you did not get the question. 122 00:05:17,576 --> 00:05:20,109 Never at any point was there a question. 123 00:05:20,143 --> 00:05:22,176 [laughing] 124 00:05:22,209 --> 00:05:23,977 Alright, how ’bout a new location? 125 00:05:24,010 --> 00:05:25,743 A, uh, rocket launch? 126 00:05:25,777 --> 00:05:28,243 So you answer the question with another question 127 00:05:28,276 --> 00:05:29,410 and pass that question to... 128 00:05:29,443 --> 00:05:30,343 Yeah. And you try to keep that... 129 00:05:30,376 --> 00:05:31,743 ...to the next person. 130 00:05:31,777 --> 00:05:33,043 Like it’s all happening in the same place... 131 00:05:33,076 --> 00:05:34,043 - Okay. - ...at the same time. 132 00:05:34,076 --> 00:05:37,443 Hey, is this the rocket launch? 133 00:05:37,476 --> 00:05:39,309 I wonder if anyone’s gonna die. 134 00:05:41,309 --> 00:05:43,777 Um, that’s not really a question. 135 00:05:43,810 --> 00:05:45,743 [Debra] Oh my God. 136 00:05:45,777 --> 00:05:48,276 Apparently, I don’t know what a question is. 137 00:05:48,309 --> 00:05:50,143 Was that a question? 138 00:05:50,176 --> 00:05:51,610 No, this is a question. 139 00:05:51,643 --> 00:05:53,510 "This is a question" is not a question. 140 00:05:53,543 --> 00:05:56,309 But "was that a question?" is a question? 141 00:05:56,343 --> 00:05:58,143 I don’t know what a question is. 142 00:05:58,176 --> 00:06:01,510 Jon fucked up. That’s him out. 143 00:06:01,543 --> 00:06:03,076 - Okay. I’ve got a question. - Alright. 144 00:06:03,109 --> 00:06:04,443 Are we still at a rocket launch? 145 00:06:04,476 --> 00:06:05,410 - Still a rocket launch. - Yeah, yeah. 146 00:06:05,443 --> 00:06:06,410 Okay. Slight revision. 147 00:06:06,443 --> 00:06:08,343 Okay. 148 00:06:08,376 --> 00:06:12,443 Is this the rocket launch or are you just happy to see me? 149 00:06:12,476 --> 00:06:13,977 [laughing] 150 00:06:14,010 --> 00:06:16,276 I’ve been here forever. 151 00:06:20,209 --> 00:06:21,343 Is that really a question? 152 00:06:21,376 --> 00:06:22,743 That’s a statement. 153 00:06:25,143 --> 00:06:27,610 Let’s see if we can actually get more than two sentences out. 154 00:06:27,643 --> 00:06:28,610 Yeah. Okay. 155 00:06:28,643 --> 00:06:30,176 Alright so, how about this? 156 00:06:30,209 --> 00:06:31,676 Does the question have to... 157 00:06:31,710 --> 00:06:33,410 The next question has to relate to the first question? 158 00:06:33,443 --> 00:06:35,043 - Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah, it would help. Yeah. 159 00:06:35,076 --> 00:06:36,710 This is a Second City Masterclass. 160 00:06:36,743 --> 00:06:38,176 [Caroline] Yeah, exactly! 161 00:06:38,209 --> 00:06:39,610 You know he’s gonna bill production. 162 00:06:39,643 --> 00:06:41,410 [laughing] 163 00:06:41,443 --> 00:06:43,243 Doctor, do you think we can save the patient? 164 00:06:43,276 --> 00:06:46,309 Nurse, do you have the adrenaline cc’s? 165 00:06:53,276 --> 00:06:56,376 Do you have the adrenaline cc’s? 166 00:06:56,410 --> 00:07:00,243 Why did you hire this nurse? 167 00:07:00,276 --> 00:07:02,076 Oh, he smiled! He smiled! 168 00:07:02,109 --> 00:07:04,176 Oh, he smiled! 169 00:07:04,209 --> 00:07:05,376 [alarm sounds] 170 00:07:05,410 --> 00:07:07,309 - Oh! - Oh! 171 00:07:11,576 --> 00:07:12,977 Oh boy. 172 00:07:13,010 --> 00:07:15,643 Uh oh. Who’s gone? 173 00:07:15,676 --> 00:07:16,943 Well, let’s find out. 174 00:07:18,543 --> 00:07:20,476 Hi, everybody! 175 00:07:20,510 --> 00:07:22,309 Alright. 176 00:07:22,343 --> 00:07:24,076 [Brandon] Who is it? Who is it? 177 00:07:24,109 --> 00:07:28,010 So, uh, let’s take a look at the freakin’ TV. 178 00:07:28,043 --> 00:07:29,209 Is it me? 179 00:07:31,343 --> 00:07:34,010 Nurse, do you have the adrenaline cc’s? 180 00:07:35,143 --> 00:07:38,777 Oh. 181 00:07:38,810 --> 00:07:40,610 Do you have the adrenaline cc’s? 182 00:07:44,843 --> 00:07:46,410 [shouting] 183 00:07:46,443 --> 00:07:48,610 Oh! Oh! 184 00:07:48,643 --> 00:07:50,443 I think it was kind of a relief to laugh. 185 00:07:50,476 --> 00:07:53,010 I was just in the moment and, uh... 186 00:07:53,043 --> 00:07:55,710 {\an8}I guess I let my guard down a little bit there. 187 00:07:57,109 --> 00:07:59,043 Yellow card! You don’t keep it. 188 00:07:59,076 --> 00:08:00,410 Oh, I don’t keep it. 189 00:08:00,443 --> 00:08:01,276 - Nobody keeps these but me. - Oh, okay. 190 00:08:01,309 --> 00:08:02,810 Aww. 191 00:08:02,843 --> 00:08:04,910 I don’t want to go over this every time I go in here! 192 00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:06,343 [band plays] 193 00:08:06,376 --> 00:08:08,076 We’re down to the wire here. 194 00:08:08,109 --> 00:08:09,343 Oh my God. 195 00:08:12,476 --> 00:08:13,543 Phew, shit. 196 00:08:15,843 --> 00:08:17,443 [Jay] Never thought this would happen but 197 00:08:17,476 --> 00:08:19,276 Tom Green gets a yellow card. 198 00:08:19,309 --> 00:08:21,710 Now everyone except Brandon 199 00:08:21,743 --> 00:08:25,076 is one laugh away from utter failure and disgrace. 200 00:08:25,109 --> 00:08:26,710 No fucking pressure! 201 00:08:27,843 --> 00:08:30,276 [horn blows] 202 00:08:30,309 --> 00:08:31,276 [plays drums] 203 00:08:32,576 --> 00:08:33,843 Yeah. 204 00:08:36,043 --> 00:08:37,309 [laughing] 205 00:08:43,076 --> 00:08:45,410 Wow. That was Gordon Lightfoot, right? 206 00:08:45,443 --> 00:08:46,710 Thank you, yeah absolutely. 207 00:08:46,743 --> 00:08:48,343 - [laughing] - [Caroline] That’s funny. 208 00:08:48,376 --> 00:08:50,977 Yeah, that was "Edmund Fitzgerald", yeah. 209 00:08:51,010 --> 00:08:54,343 [clock beeps] 210 00:08:54,376 --> 00:08:57,943 So if we were to start the movie Titanic right now, 211 00:08:57,977 --> 00:09:00,143 it would still take like an hour and a half 212 00:09:00,176 --> 00:09:02,810 for the iceberg to hit. 213 00:09:02,843 --> 00:09:06,010 And we are nowhere near the people starting to die 214 00:09:06,043 --> 00:09:08,676 and like jumping out of the, plop, plop, plop, like that. 215 00:09:08,710 --> 00:09:10,176 What’s the porn version of Titanic? 216 00:09:12,043 --> 00:09:15,309 It’s called Titanic Cock. 217 00:09:15,343 --> 00:09:17,109 Mmm. 218 00:09:17,143 --> 00:09:18,576 That’s like a little... 219 00:09:18,610 --> 00:09:20,743 It’s a little lazy but sometimes they get lazy. 220 00:09:20,777 --> 00:09:22,676 It’s called Giant Cock. 221 00:09:22,710 --> 00:09:24,309 Oh, okay. I mean. 222 00:09:24,343 --> 00:09:26,510 [laughing] 223 00:09:29,376 --> 00:09:31,076 I’ll just go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back. 224 00:09:33,010 --> 00:09:35,043 Whew. Oh boy. 225 00:09:35,076 --> 00:09:36,710 [Jon] Hour four. 226 00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:39,510 Your brain, you just, it shorts a little bit. 227 00:09:39,543 --> 00:09:41,309 You’re like, oh well, we haven’t laughed so far 228 00:09:41,343 --> 00:09:43,977 so we’re, we’re, we’re good 229 00:09:44,010 --> 00:09:47,076 but no, no, no, no, no, you’re not good! 230 00:09:47,109 --> 00:09:49,443 Ah. 231 00:09:49,476 --> 00:09:51,610 Jon, you alright buddy? 232 00:09:51,643 --> 00:09:53,576 - You alright? - Mmm hmm. 233 00:09:53,610 --> 00:09:55,010 As I looked around... 234 00:09:55,043 --> 00:09:57,376 I thought, okay, I think I can get Jon. 235 00:09:57,410 --> 00:10:01,010 And then I thought hey, this might be funny. 236 00:10:01,043 --> 00:10:05,176 The sound of a penguin being penetrated. 237 00:10:08,043 --> 00:10:10,643 I’m not proud of this. 238 00:10:10,676 --> 00:10:13,143 Oh, hey Jon, did I show you my penguin having sex? 239 00:10:13,176 --> 00:10:14,443 [Andrew] Yeah. Yeah. 240 00:10:14,476 --> 00:10:16,109 No. 241 00:10:16,143 --> 00:10:17,510 Imagine they’re really close to the ground. 242 00:10:17,543 --> 00:10:19,143 Yeah. 243 00:10:19,176 --> 00:10:20,710 [squeaking] 244 00:10:25,076 --> 00:10:26,343 [laughing] 245 00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:29,010 Jon is going to break so big! 246 00:10:29,043 --> 00:10:30,109 [Colin squealing] 247 00:10:31,410 --> 00:10:34,109 Oh, Jon’s on the fucking brink. 248 00:10:34,143 --> 00:10:35,410 That a boy, Colin, get him. 249 00:10:35,443 --> 00:10:36,843 And then the fish. 250 00:10:36,877 --> 00:10:38,743 [gulping] 251 00:10:38,777 --> 00:10:40,176 [squeals] 252 00:10:45,043 --> 00:10:46,010 [laughing] 253 00:10:46,043 --> 00:10:47,043 Fuck you! 254 00:10:47,076 --> 00:10:48,243 [laughing] 255 00:10:48,276 --> 00:10:50,476 That’s a laugh. That’s a laugh! 256 00:10:50,510 --> 00:10:52,143 Oh! 257 00:10:52,176 --> 00:10:56,076 Oh! Of all the things. 258 00:10:56,109 --> 00:10:57,676 People think I’m a nice guy, 259 00:10:57,710 --> 00:11:01,576 but I have levels of horrific depravity in me. 260 00:11:01,610 --> 00:11:04,043 I probably need some therapy. 261 00:11:05,109 --> 00:11:06,476 [alarm blaring] 262 00:11:08,109 --> 00:11:10,376 Hi, everybody! Alright. 263 00:11:10,410 --> 00:11:12,510 That didn’t fucking take very long. 264 00:11:12,543 --> 00:11:13,410 You guys really missed me, eh? 265 00:11:13,443 --> 00:11:15,209 Oh, what did I miss? 266 00:11:15,243 --> 00:11:18,476 So, uh, everybody just watch the TV. 267 00:11:21,209 --> 00:11:23,710 Hey Jon, did I show you my penguin having sex? 268 00:11:23,743 --> 00:11:26,143 [squealing] 269 00:11:27,610 --> 00:11:29,443 And then the fish. 270 00:11:29,476 --> 00:11:31,043 [gulping] 271 00:11:31,076 --> 00:11:32,276 [laughing] 272 00:11:32,309 --> 00:11:35,143 Oh... 273 00:11:35,176 --> 00:11:38,576 [laughing] 274 00:11:38,610 --> 00:11:40,910 Fuck you! 275 00:11:40,943 --> 00:11:44,109 [laughing] 276 00:11:44,143 --> 00:11:47,076 Colin Mochrie. One of my heroes. 277 00:11:47,109 --> 00:11:50,309 Playing a penguin swallowing a fish. 278 00:11:50,343 --> 00:11:53,676 What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? 279 00:11:53,710 --> 00:11:55,476 That’s officially Jon Lajoie done. 280 00:11:55,510 --> 00:11:57,010 Red carded and out. 281 00:11:57,043 --> 00:11:57,943 You’re fucking out. 282 00:11:57,977 --> 00:11:59,343 Bye, Jon. 283 00:11:59,376 --> 00:12:01,443 - It has been an honor. - Oh, it’s been great. 284 00:12:01,476 --> 00:12:04,743 It legitimately makes me feel emotional. 285 00:12:04,777 --> 00:12:06,410 So, thank you Colin. 286 00:12:06,443 --> 00:12:09,476 That... was fucking funny. 287 00:12:09,510 --> 00:12:11,109 [laughing] 288 00:12:11,143 --> 00:12:12,376 - Ahhh. - Alright, so? 289 00:12:12,410 --> 00:12:13,977 Ooh. 290 00:12:14,010 --> 00:12:15,410 How does it feel? Are you happy to be done? 291 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,710 Oh my god. It’s exhausting it’s in there. 292 00:12:17,743 --> 00:12:19,343 Colin Mochrie. 293 00:12:19,376 --> 00:12:20,610 He was like doing the equivalent of 294 00:12:20,643 --> 00:12:23,010 just beating the shit out of me. 295 00:12:23,043 --> 00:12:25,076 We don’t know how you made it as long as you did. 296 00:12:25,109 --> 00:12:29,109 There were so many fantastic shots of you like this... 297 00:12:29,143 --> 00:12:31,743 [Debra] We literally fucking threw up in here. 298 00:12:31,777 --> 00:12:34,043 [Jay] Colin knocks Jon out of the game 299 00:12:34,076 --> 00:12:36,309 and I for one am relieved. 300 00:12:36,343 --> 00:12:38,410 It’s down to the final four to scrap it out 301 00:12:38,443 --> 00:12:40,610 for a hundred thousand dollars for their charity. 302 00:12:40,643 --> 00:12:42,977 Let’s rumble, babies! 303 00:12:43,010 --> 00:12:46,243 Sorry about all those things that I was doing. 304 00:12:46,276 --> 00:12:50,977 I, Jay Baruchel, believe R. Kelly is the man. 305 00:12:52,076 --> 00:12:53,043 Colin, may I? 306 00:12:53,076 --> 00:12:54,743 Oh yeah, I forgot he was there. 307 00:12:54,777 --> 00:12:56,076 Hours of fun. 308 00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:57,209 He only looks one way now. 309 00:12:57,243 --> 00:12:58,209 I don’t know what that means. 310 00:12:58,243 --> 00:12:59,410 [horn blows] 311 00:13:01,076 --> 00:13:03,176 Oh, that was close! 312 00:13:03,209 --> 00:13:05,276 [clock beeps] 313 00:13:11,309 --> 00:13:13,209 Hello, all my gang. 314 00:13:14,410 --> 00:13:16,510 Oh. 315 00:13:16,543 --> 00:13:19,076 Where are my friends? 316 00:13:19,109 --> 00:13:22,777 Oh, I think Tom is doing his mime thing to no one. 317 00:13:22,810 --> 00:13:24,343 I thought mimes didn’t say anything? 318 00:13:24,376 --> 00:13:25,309 Then he’s a clown. 319 00:13:25,343 --> 00:13:26,176 Okay. Sorry. 320 00:13:26,209 --> 00:13:27,243 Hello, mister. 321 00:13:27,276 --> 00:13:28,777 Hello, Colin. 322 00:13:28,810 --> 00:13:29,443 {\an8}Hello. 323 00:13:29,476 --> 00:13:30,343 Are you doing well? 324 00:13:30,376 --> 00:13:32,710 Yes, of course and you. 325 00:13:32,743 --> 00:13:34,043 Um, where did you study? 326 00:13:34,076 --> 00:13:37,243 Oh, uh, Quebec. 327 00:13:37,276 --> 00:13:38,643 [laughing] 328 00:13:38,676 --> 00:13:41,476 Tom, in a beard with a white face. 329 00:13:41,510 --> 00:13:45,676 It’s especially, I’m gonna be frank, frightening. 330 00:13:45,710 --> 00:13:48,977 Eh, are you part of a troupe? Or are you a solo artist? 331 00:13:49,010 --> 00:13:51,109 A little of this, a little of that. 332 00:13:51,143 --> 00:13:52,143 Oh yeah. 333 00:13:52,176 --> 00:13:53,510 Oi, oi, oi. 334 00:13:53,543 --> 00:13:55,076 What’s the translation of that? 335 00:13:55,109 --> 00:13:56,676 (random profanity) 336 00:13:56,710 --> 00:13:57,710 Uh-huh. 337 00:13:59,176 --> 00:14:01,743 [laughing] 338 00:14:01,777 --> 00:14:02,977 You know there are French Canadians 339 00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:04,777 killing themselves watching this right now. 340 00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:06,810 [Jay] His fucking French is pretty good. 341 00:14:08,010 --> 00:14:09,076 Um, and you... 342 00:14:09,109 --> 00:14:10,109 Hello, Andrew. 343 00:14:10,143 --> 00:14:11,710 Are you good sir? 344 00:14:11,743 --> 00:14:14,610 {\an8}[speaking French] 345 00:14:14,643 --> 00:14:16,176 Look at my bag. 346 00:14:16,209 --> 00:14:17,376 {\an8}- Alright. - My bag. 347 00:14:17,410 --> 00:14:20,410 A little joke for you in my bag, Andrew! 348 00:14:20,443 --> 00:14:21,510 Yes. 349 00:14:21,543 --> 00:14:22,676 Okay? 350 00:14:22,710 --> 00:14:23,576 Tom’s so funny. 351 00:14:23,610 --> 00:14:25,076 Look. 352 00:14:25,109 --> 00:14:26,143 Okay. 353 00:14:26,176 --> 00:14:28,476 - Oi, oi, oi. - Oh! Oh! 354 00:14:28,510 --> 00:14:33,410 I was like oh! Oh no, that’s good. That’s good. 355 00:14:33,443 --> 00:14:36,376 I am a... 356 00:14:36,410 --> 00:14:37,476 Squirrel! 357 00:14:37,510 --> 00:14:39,410 No, no, no. A squirrel. 358 00:14:39,443 --> 00:14:40,676 Squirrel, Colin? 359 00:14:40,710 --> 00:14:41,710 Grey. 360 00:14:41,743 --> 00:14:43,076 Hello, Colin. 361 00:14:43,109 --> 00:14:43,977 {\an8}[speaking French] 362 00:14:44,010 --> 00:14:46,476 I am a grey squirrel. 363 00:14:46,510 --> 00:14:47,977 I am a... 364 00:14:48,010 --> 00:14:49,176 beige man. 365 00:14:49,209 --> 00:14:51,109 [laughing] 366 00:14:53,076 --> 00:14:55,610 And I eat nuts for the winter. 367 00:14:55,643 --> 00:14:59,476 Because it’s very cold in the winter, Andrew. 368 00:14:59,510 --> 00:15:00,777 It’s very cold! 369 00:15:00,810 --> 00:15:03,543 But the nuts feed me! 370 00:15:03,576 --> 00:15:05,043 Feed me for the winter, Andrew! 371 00:15:05,076 --> 00:15:07,209 {\an8}[speaking French] 372 00:15:07,243 --> 00:15:09,977 [laughing] 373 00:15:10,010 --> 00:15:11,576 [Dave] Tom looked like a mime... 374 00:15:11,610 --> 00:15:14,043 {\an8}But he kept shouting which mimes don’t do. 375 00:15:14,076 --> 00:15:15,376 Feed me! 376 00:15:15,410 --> 00:15:18,010 Feed me for the winter! 377 00:15:18,043 --> 00:15:19,743 There’s no real idea there. 378 00:15:19,777 --> 00:15:23,209 It’s just Tom going all the way on it. 379 00:15:23,243 --> 00:15:25,676 And it can be hard to resist it. 380 00:15:25,710 --> 00:15:27,610 Uh, is your mime usually this loud? 381 00:15:27,643 --> 00:15:29,676 I’m not a mime, I’m not a mime. 382 00:15:29,710 --> 00:15:32,510 Oh, I’m sorry. Oh, you’re a clown? 383 00:15:32,543 --> 00:15:33,376 I’m not a mime... 384 00:15:33,410 --> 00:15:35,610 (random profanity) 385 00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,476 You are dressed like a mime. 386 00:15:37,510 --> 00:15:39,076 - Mmm. - [Andrew] Yeah. 387 00:15:39,109 --> 00:15:40,410 I mean... 388 00:15:40,443 --> 00:15:43,043 If that doesn’t get you. 389 00:15:43,076 --> 00:15:45,443 [Jon] So good. The commitment. 390 00:15:45,476 --> 00:15:47,076 Hello, fish. 391 00:15:47,109 --> 00:15:48,610 Hello, grey squirrel. 392 00:15:48,643 --> 00:15:51,476 Yeah. That’s Tom Green. Here he is! 393 00:15:52,543 --> 00:15:55,076 Toot toot toot. 394 00:15:55,109 --> 00:15:56,176 Oh, so this is what’s happening? 395 00:15:56,209 --> 00:15:57,543 Hello, Brandon. 396 00:15:57,576 --> 00:15:58,977 {\an8}[speaking French] 397 00:16:01,576 --> 00:16:03,643 I am a butterfly. 398 00:16:03,676 --> 00:16:05,309 What the hell is going on? 399 00:16:05,343 --> 00:16:07,376 [Brandon] I see Tom in... 400 00:16:07,410 --> 00:16:10,843 ...like, white face. Mmm, cancelling him! 401 00:16:10,877 --> 00:16:13,109 And I was trying very hard, 402 00:16:13,143 --> 00:16:15,309 I was like okay, this is very funny. 403 00:16:15,343 --> 00:16:16,343 It was very funny. 404 00:16:16,376 --> 00:16:18,343 Do you speak a little French? 405 00:16:18,376 --> 00:16:19,443 {\an8}What’s that mean? 406 00:16:19,476 --> 00:16:20,543 He’s asking if you speak French? 407 00:16:20,576 --> 00:16:21,410 {\an8}No. 408 00:16:21,443 --> 00:16:22,510 Do you speak French? 409 00:16:22,543 --> 00:16:23,443 {\an8}No, no Francais. 410 00:16:23,476 --> 00:16:24,343 You don’t speak French? 411 00:16:24,376 --> 00:16:25,209 {\an8}No Francais. 412 00:16:25,243 --> 00:16:26,209 Okay. 413 00:16:26,243 --> 00:16:27,343 That’s it. 414 00:16:27,376 --> 00:16:28,810 Oi yoi yoi. 415 00:16:28,843 --> 00:16:31,143 I don’t think any of them are gonna laugh. 416 00:16:31,176 --> 00:16:33,010 It’s okay. It’s okay. 417 00:16:33,043 --> 00:16:34,843 Just an attempt at a joke. 418 00:16:34,877 --> 00:16:35,710 Oi, oi, oi. 419 00:16:35,743 --> 00:16:37,209 I feel like we broke a clown. 420 00:16:38,643 --> 00:16:40,343 That didn’t work. 421 00:16:40,376 --> 00:16:43,443 What the fuck? What’s Tom doing? 422 00:16:43,476 --> 00:16:45,443 I kinda figured they dig the French comedy. 423 00:16:45,476 --> 00:16:46,910 What are you gonna do? 424 00:16:46,943 --> 00:16:49,010 I wonder how long it’ll take to get rid of his makeup? 425 00:16:49,043 --> 00:16:51,443 Yeah. 426 00:16:51,476 --> 00:16:54,510 [clock beeps] 427 00:16:57,343 --> 00:16:58,610 Got the gorilla suit. 428 00:16:58,643 --> 00:16:59,977 - Oh God, finally! - Yeah. 429 00:17:00,010 --> 00:17:01,410 Tom’s not giving up. 430 00:17:01,443 --> 00:17:02,810 God bless Tom. 431 00:17:02,843 --> 00:17:05,376 Every shift, he’s Gordie Howe, man. 432 00:17:05,410 --> 00:17:08,343 It actually does look a little more Bigfooty. 433 00:17:08,376 --> 00:17:10,143 Yeah. It is a Bigfoot actually, yeah. 434 00:17:10,176 --> 00:17:11,176 Oh. 435 00:17:11,209 --> 00:17:12,510 [Tom] I am turning fifty. 436 00:17:12,543 --> 00:17:14,043 If you asked me when I was... 437 00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:15,209 sixteen years old, what I would be doing 438 00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,510 on my fiftieth birthday, I probably 439 00:17:16,543 --> 00:17:19,610 would have not guessed... this. 440 00:17:19,643 --> 00:17:23,710 Is this really what I’m doing with my life? 441 00:17:23,743 --> 00:17:25,710 I was really hoping the French stuff was gonna get ya, 442 00:17:25,743 --> 00:17:27,777 but what are ya gonna do? 443 00:17:28,843 --> 00:17:31,043 I don’t know. 444 00:17:31,076 --> 00:17:33,743 I tell ya Brandon, that really knocks ’em dead in Val-d’Or. 445 00:17:33,777 --> 00:17:34,943 In Val-d’Or? 446 00:17:34,977 --> 00:17:37,443 Mmm. 447 00:17:37,476 --> 00:17:38,109 That’s great! 448 00:17:38,143 --> 00:17:39,910 Val-d’Or. 449 00:17:41,109 --> 00:17:43,309 So... time for shots or what? 450 00:17:43,343 --> 00:17:44,476 Oh, I’ll drink with you. 451 00:17:44,510 --> 00:17:46,176 You’ll have a drink with me, Colin? 452 00:17:46,209 --> 00:17:47,109 Yeah, I’ll make you guys a drink, what do you want? 453 00:17:47,143 --> 00:17:48,143 Oh, there we go. 454 00:17:48,176 --> 00:17:49,176 Oh, it’s gonna get dark. 455 00:17:49,209 --> 00:17:52,243 I’ll have, uh, a red wine. 456 00:17:52,276 --> 00:17:53,309 A red wine. 457 00:17:53,343 --> 00:17:54,676 Red wine, that sounds nice. 458 00:17:54,710 --> 00:17:57,977 What goes good with red wine? Whisky? 459 00:17:58,010 --> 00:17:59,476 That was a joke. That was, that was a gag. 460 00:17:59,510 --> 00:18:01,109 [laughing] 461 00:18:05,576 --> 00:18:06,443 Hello? 462 00:18:06,476 --> 00:18:07,576 Hello. It’s Colin. 463 00:18:07,610 --> 00:18:08,977 Hi, Colin. 464 00:18:09,010 --> 00:18:11,243 I think I wanna do, uh, Hamlet now. 465 00:18:11,276 --> 00:18:14,043 Oh, alright. I will get that set up for you. 466 00:18:14,076 --> 00:18:15,243 Okay. 467 00:18:15,276 --> 00:18:16,710 See ya. 468 00:18:19,209 --> 00:18:21,010 I feel like when my dad tunes into this show 469 00:18:21,043 --> 00:18:22,443 he’s gonna be proud of me. 470 00:18:30,343 --> 00:18:33,343 Ooh! 471 00:18:33,376 --> 00:18:36,276 Oh! I gotta do some, some acting. 472 00:18:36,309 --> 00:18:38,376 One second, let me fix my hair. 473 00:18:38,410 --> 00:18:39,743 Okay. That’s much better. 474 00:18:39,777 --> 00:18:42,143 Tom looks like he’s on a Rob Zombie movie. 475 00:18:42,176 --> 00:18:43,443 [laughing] 476 00:18:45,209 --> 00:18:47,376 I’m gonna sit here. 477 00:18:47,410 --> 00:18:48,977 Oh, you doing Shakespeare, you weren’t lying. 478 00:18:49,010 --> 00:18:51,643 I would like to do Hamlet. 479 00:18:51,676 --> 00:18:56,276 And one of my favourite shows is, uh, baking shows. 480 00:18:56,309 --> 00:19:01,176 And then I realised, Hamlet is Danish. 481 00:19:01,209 --> 00:19:03,143 - Mmm. I love danishes. - [Andrew] Oh, damn. 482 00:19:03,176 --> 00:19:04,343 - He’s a Danish. - Yeah. 483 00:19:04,376 --> 00:19:06,010 So in this version. 484 00:19:06,043 --> 00:19:08,010 Hamlet’s father of course is killed by his uncle. 485 00:19:08,043 --> 00:19:09,209 Yeah. 486 00:19:09,243 --> 00:19:11,376 His father owned the biggest pastry shops 487 00:19:11,410 --> 00:19:13,076 in the entire world. 488 00:19:13,109 --> 00:19:15,810 I’m like on the edge of my seat with this. 489 00:19:15,843 --> 00:19:18,543 Colin’s doing the Lord’s work in there. 490 00:19:18,576 --> 00:19:20,109 Hamlet has come up with this plan 491 00:19:20,143 --> 00:19:23,143 to expose his uncle and perhaps even kill him. 492 00:19:23,176 --> 00:19:24,243 Oh. 493 00:19:24,276 --> 00:19:25,276 Expose himself to his uncle? 494 00:19:25,309 --> 00:19:26,309 - Yeah. - Ooooh. 495 00:19:26,343 --> 00:19:27,977 So one night he’s baking. 496 00:19:28,010 --> 00:19:29,643 He’s rolling up his little balls. 497 00:19:29,676 --> 00:19:32,043 And he says one of the most famous speeches 498 00:19:32,076 --> 00:19:35,309 ever in the history of Shakespeare. 499 00:19:35,343 --> 00:19:36,743 - To be... - Or not to be. 500 00:19:36,777 --> 00:19:38,710 That’s the one about the moon landing, right? 501 00:19:38,743 --> 00:19:39,977 No. Not even close. 502 00:19:40,010 --> 00:19:41,209 Huh. 503 00:19:41,243 --> 00:19:43,877 [laughing] 504 00:19:43,910 --> 00:19:48,443 Uh, but it is about the frailty of humanity. 505 00:19:48,476 --> 00:19:50,209 Can see why it never caught on. 506 00:19:50,243 --> 00:19:52,376 Yeah, no it’s like a really popular show. 507 00:19:52,410 --> 00:19:55,043 Ah okay. Okay. Seems a little too complicated. 508 00:19:57,076 --> 00:19:58,410 Human frailty. 509 00:20:00,010 --> 00:20:01,977 [Colin] So Hamlet is so tired. 510 00:20:02,010 --> 00:20:07,243 Thinking about how he’s going to avenge the death of his father. 511 00:20:07,276 --> 00:20:10,309 He starts to speak. 512 00:20:10,343 --> 00:20:13,610 To be or not... 513 00:20:13,643 --> 00:20:16,109 Owww fuck! 514 00:20:16,143 --> 00:20:16,977 Holy crap. 515 00:20:17,010 --> 00:20:17,643 Oh man. 516 00:20:17,676 --> 00:20:19,910 [laughing] 517 00:20:21,943 --> 00:20:24,109 I love when people hurt themselves. 518 00:20:24,143 --> 00:20:25,410 [laughing] 519 00:20:27,276 --> 00:20:29,010 Owww, fuck! 520 00:20:29,043 --> 00:20:30,443 Colin Mochrie. 521 00:20:30,476 --> 00:20:32,076 He’s the Beyonce. 522 00:20:32,109 --> 00:20:33,176 Owww. 523 00:20:33,209 --> 00:20:34,076 And we are... 524 00:20:34,109 --> 00:20:36,109 ...a sea of Michelles. 525 00:20:36,143 --> 00:20:37,910 I love Michelle Williams by the way. 526 00:20:40,877 --> 00:20:43,576 Oh man. I’m so sorry. 527 00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:45,476 He gonna have to go to the hospital after this. 528 00:20:45,510 --> 00:20:48,243 Shakespeare, man, it will kill you! 529 00:20:48,276 --> 00:20:50,276 [laughing] 530 00:20:50,309 --> 00:20:53,977 Colin is all world, man. All world. 531 00:20:59,877 --> 00:21:03,376 I am definitely loosening up, as you can see. 532 00:21:03,410 --> 00:21:04,977 Are you enjoying the wine? 533 00:21:05,010 --> 00:21:06,176 - Oh yeah, I am. Absolutely. - Yeah. Yeah, me too. 534 00:21:06,209 --> 00:21:08,043 Yeah. Probably was a mistake, 535 00:21:08,076 --> 00:21:09,543 strategically, to start drinking. 536 00:21:09,576 --> 00:21:11,543 Absolutely. We may have picked the wrong time. 537 00:21:11,576 --> 00:21:13,443 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 538 00:21:13,476 --> 00:21:14,309 [taps mic] 539 00:21:14,343 --> 00:21:15,610 Hi. 540 00:21:15,643 --> 00:21:17,143 Uh, so I read your minds and uh... 541 00:21:17,176 --> 00:21:18,010 Uh oh. 542 00:21:18,043 --> 00:21:19,543 Dance party. 543 00:21:19,576 --> 00:21:21,309 [horn blows] 544 00:21:21,343 --> 00:21:23,176 Okay. 545 00:21:23,209 --> 00:21:26,476 [dance music plays] 546 00:21:27,643 --> 00:21:28,943 Wooo. 547 00:21:34,410 --> 00:21:36,109 I don’t know what to say. 548 00:21:36,143 --> 00:21:38,243 [K. Trevor] This is comedy gold, you guys. 549 00:21:38,276 --> 00:21:40,043 [laughing] 550 00:21:40,076 --> 00:21:41,243 I’m worried. 551 00:21:44,610 --> 00:21:46,309 This is so awkward. 552 00:21:46,343 --> 00:21:48,443 It’s, like, torturously uncomfortable now. 553 00:21:48,476 --> 00:21:51,143 [K. Trevor] Oh, I love being in the mean kids room. 554 00:21:51,176 --> 00:21:52,977 [laughing] 555 00:21:53,010 --> 00:21:54,843 We are now officially the comics at the back of the club. 556 00:21:54,877 --> 00:21:55,977 We are, yeah. 557 00:21:58,710 --> 00:22:00,109 Shall we start rapping? 558 00:22:00,143 --> 00:22:01,176 Yeah, rap! 559 00:22:01,209 --> 00:22:02,410 Tom’s a very good rapper. 560 00:22:02,443 --> 00:22:04,643 - Oh, good, let’s do this. - Yes! 561 00:22:04,676 --> 00:22:05,777 Yeah. 562 00:22:08,543 --> 00:22:11,376 ♪ Gimme a pen, so I can begin to write a new rhyme ♪ 563 00:22:11,410 --> 00:22:13,510 ♪ Start a new trend Sound the alarm ♪ 564 00:22:13,543 --> 00:22:16,143 ♪ I’m dropping a bomb, giving ya flashbacks ♪ 565 00:22:16,176 --> 00:22:17,410 ♪ Like Vietnam ♪ 566 00:22:17,443 --> 00:22:18,910 ♪ You want a rhyme like mine? ♪ 567 00:22:18,943 --> 00:22:21,109 ♪ You gotta sign the contract on the dotted line ♪ 568 00:22:21,143 --> 00:22:22,977 ♪ I got ya strung out, you never hung out ♪ 569 00:22:23,010 --> 00:22:24,410 ♪ T. G. number one out ♪ 570 00:22:24,443 --> 00:22:25,576 Wooo. 571 00:22:25,610 --> 00:22:27,443 Ow! 572 00:22:27,476 --> 00:22:29,143 ♪ Coming back with a blast, a blast in the back draft ♪ 573 00:22:29,176 --> 00:22:31,143 ♪ Original jackass, rapping on a phat track ♪ 574 00:22:31,176 --> 00:22:33,043 ♪ I make a movie like Jack Black and jump ♪ 575 00:22:33,076 --> 00:22:35,376 ♪ On a jet plane with nothing but socks in the backpack ♪ 576 00:22:35,410 --> 00:22:37,076 Hey. Alright. 577 00:22:37,109 --> 00:22:38,076 [applause] 578 00:22:38,109 --> 00:22:39,276 Yes! 579 00:22:39,309 --> 00:22:43,209 ♪ Colin Mochrie ♪ 580 00:22:43,243 --> 00:22:46,410 ♪ I want you to be with me ♪ 581 00:22:46,443 --> 00:22:48,243 [laughing] 582 00:22:48,276 --> 00:22:51,143 ♪ Used to watch you on Who’s Line Is It Anyway ♪ 583 00:22:51,176 --> 00:22:54,977 ♪ And I wished to God that you were gay ♪ 584 00:22:55,010 --> 00:22:59,176 ♪ Oh Grilled Cheese ♪ 585 00:22:59,209 --> 00:23:01,376 ♪ Uh! Colin ♪ 586 00:23:01,410 --> 00:23:05,309 ♪ Yo. Yo, yo. Yo, yo. ♪ 587 00:23:05,343 --> 00:23:09,076 ♪ Yo, yo, yo. Yo, yo, yooooooo, yo, yo, yo ♪ 588 00:23:09,109 --> 00:23:11,043 ♪ I love my grilled cheese on my bread ♪ 589 00:23:11,076 --> 00:23:13,143 ♪ One more dance I might be dead ♪ 590 00:23:13,176 --> 00:23:15,010 ♪ ’Cause you know I’m 64 ♪ 591 00:23:15,043 --> 00:23:17,576 ♪ Even though I dance I don’t know the score ♪ 592 00:23:17,610 --> 00:23:19,243 ♪ I dance up and down ♪ 593 00:23:19,276 --> 00:23:21,043 ♪ I think I’m just everyone’s clown ♪ 594 00:23:21,076 --> 00:23:23,643 I’ll be honest, I didn’t think he could do this. 595 00:23:23,676 --> 00:23:25,176 Yeah. Right? 596 00:23:25,209 --> 00:23:29,010 ♪ Love the cheese Give me, please ♪ 597 00:23:29,043 --> 00:23:31,043 I’m sorry, is Colin Mochrie just killing a rap right now? 598 00:23:31,076 --> 00:23:32,877 - Seriously. - He is! 599 00:23:32,910 --> 00:23:35,143 Not a tonne of Scotch Canadian guys 600 00:23:35,176 --> 00:23:37,510 in their 60s would be able to do that. 601 00:23:37,543 --> 00:23:38,977 Yeah. 602 00:23:39,010 --> 00:23:40,109 [Colin] I didn’t think I was going 603 00:23:40,143 --> 00:23:41,176 to be at home with the freestyle rapping. 604 00:23:41,209 --> 00:23:44,209 And yet, there I am. Fully committed. 605 00:23:44,243 --> 00:23:45,610 You know what? 606 00:23:45,643 --> 00:23:47,510 This could actually be the end of the career. 607 00:23:47,543 --> 00:23:49,076 That we’re filming. 608 00:23:49,109 --> 00:23:51,309 Well, you know. Still no one laughing though. 609 00:23:51,343 --> 00:23:52,543 But everyone was grooving. 610 00:23:52,576 --> 00:23:53,576 - Yeah. - Yeah, everyone was grooving. 611 00:23:53,610 --> 00:23:55,343 Like everyone was feeling it. 612 00:23:55,376 --> 00:23:57,643 I’m gonna lie down on my face for about three minutes. 613 00:23:57,676 --> 00:23:59,309 [laughing] 614 00:24:10,877 --> 00:24:11,843 Nah, that’s not gonna work. 615 00:24:14,109 --> 00:24:16,109 [Jay] It’s time to check out our Kill List. 616 00:24:16,143 --> 00:24:19,877 Andrew has come close but hasn’t eliminated anyone. 617 00:24:19,910 --> 00:24:21,343 Same with Brandon... yet. 618 00:24:21,376 --> 00:24:24,143 Colin has been a stone cold assassin 619 00:24:24,176 --> 00:24:26,576 bumping off Deb and Jon. 620 00:24:26,610 --> 00:24:28,643 Tom has been even deadlier, 621 00:24:28,676 --> 00:24:32,143 eliminating Mae, K. Trev and Dave. 622 00:24:32,176 --> 00:24:34,243 Oh, and of course Caroline... 623 00:24:34,276 --> 00:24:36,209 Well, she kinda fucking self destructed. 624 00:24:38,276 --> 00:24:40,743 We are all really giving it our best shot. 625 00:24:40,777 --> 00:24:41,710 Okay. 626 00:24:41,743 --> 00:24:42,676 Uh huh. 627 00:24:42,710 --> 00:24:44,176 Pulling out all the stops. 628 00:24:44,209 --> 00:24:47,010 The good news is, the last person to laugh 629 00:24:47,043 --> 00:24:49,010 can go down in history 630 00:24:49,043 --> 00:24:51,376 as being the most humourless bastard in Canada. 631 00:24:51,410 --> 00:24:53,176 That is true. 632 00:24:53,209 --> 00:24:55,410 I wonder if you get a plaque or something that says that? 633 00:24:55,443 --> 00:24:57,076 Just nice to be nominated. 634 00:24:57,109 --> 00:24:58,209 - Yeah. - Yeah. 635 00:24:58,243 --> 00:25:00,977 - Tom! - Great Tom, doing it. 636 00:25:01,010 --> 00:25:03,743 What is, uh, an award that you’re most proud of? 637 00:25:03,777 --> 00:25:07,977 In 2012, I was voted Best Local Comedian and Best Local Actor. 638 00:25:08,010 --> 00:25:10,010 That’s, that’s the year I quit my job to pursue comedy. 639 00:25:10,043 --> 00:25:11,176 That is, that’s amazing. 640 00:25:11,209 --> 00:25:12,143 - Oh, okay. - What was your job? 641 00:25:12,176 --> 00:25:14,443 I ran, I ran a non-profit. 642 00:25:14,476 --> 00:25:17,010 My entire comedy career has been a non-profit. 643 00:25:18,143 --> 00:25:18,943 [laughing] 644 00:25:21,010 --> 00:25:22,543 - You got a house. - Yeah. That’s true. 645 00:25:22,576 --> 00:25:23,843 - You got a dog. - You have a legacy. 646 00:25:23,877 --> 00:25:26,610 I’ve got a dog. I’ve got a Sasquatch costume. 647 00:25:26,643 --> 00:25:28,877 Everything’s going great. 648 00:25:28,910 --> 00:25:32,143 Is that a rental or yours? 649 00:25:32,176 --> 00:25:34,643 Eh, I don’t fucking know. 650 00:25:34,676 --> 00:25:36,376 [sighs] 651 00:25:36,410 --> 00:25:39,109 I don’t how any of them are gonna crack? 652 00:25:39,143 --> 00:25:41,710 Well, at this rate we’re gonna fucking be here all night. 653 00:25:41,743 --> 00:25:44,877 It’s time to go to defcon one. 654 00:25:44,910 --> 00:25:46,676 [alarm sounds] 655 00:25:46,710 --> 00:25:48,576 - Ooh. - Oh. 656 00:25:48,610 --> 00:25:51,109 Drastic times call for drastic measures. 657 00:25:51,143 --> 00:25:52,476 Yeah. Good, good, good. 658 00:25:52,510 --> 00:25:54,843 - I don’t know. - Uh oh. 659 00:25:54,877 --> 00:25:56,710 I wonder... I don’t know. 660 00:25:58,643 --> 00:26:00,376 Alright, um. 661 00:26:00,410 --> 00:26:02,343 It certainly didn’t feel like anyone laughed. 662 00:26:02,376 --> 00:26:04,176 - No one did. - Oh. 663 00:26:04,209 --> 00:26:05,977 Home stretch, we’re getting close to the end here. 664 00:26:06,010 --> 00:26:07,443 You’ve all been great. 665 00:26:07,476 --> 00:26:10,877 Uh, but two of you have failed to cause an elimination. 666 00:26:13,610 --> 00:26:17,810 At the one hour mark, if neither of you 667 00:26:17,843 --> 00:26:20,109 makes someone laugh, you’re out of the game 668 00:26:20,143 --> 00:26:22,109 and you’ll join me and the others in the lodge. 669 00:26:22,143 --> 00:26:23,476 Ooh. 670 00:26:23,510 --> 00:26:25,376 The spirit is in me now. 671 00:26:25,410 --> 00:26:28,309 I have to like focus. I’m ready for battle. 672 00:26:29,510 --> 00:26:31,777 This is the playoffs. Win or go home. 673 00:26:31,810 --> 00:26:34,877 But the odds are stacked against me because 674 00:26:34,910 --> 00:26:37,043 with those three in the final four... 675 00:26:37,076 --> 00:26:38,743 I’m screwed. 676 00:26:38,777 --> 00:26:40,043 Good luck. 677 00:26:43,343 --> 00:26:46,010 Oooh. 678 00:26:46,043 --> 00:26:47,576 {\an8}- [doorbell rings] - From Schitt’s Creek! 679 00:26:47,610 --> 00:26:48,543 {\an8}I wanna congratulate you... 680 00:26:48,576 --> 00:26:50,043 {\an8}- Oh. - Oh. 681 00:26:50,076 --> 00:26:51,643 {\an8}...on being our final comedians! 682 00:26:51,676 --> 00:26:53,576 {\an8}By this point... I am so desperate. 683 00:26:53,610 --> 00:26:55,777 {\an8}I’m just a little baby. 684 00:26:55,810 --> 00:26:56,743 {\an8}[laughing] 685 00:26:56,777 --> 00:26:58,209 {\an8}I’m going bananas. 686 00:26:58,243 --> 00:27:00,576 {\an8}[Tom] If you told me that I’d be doing this when I was 50... 687 00:27:00,610 --> 00:27:02,143 {\an8}I probably would have drowned myself. 688 00:27:02,176 --> 00:27:03,676 {\an8}Oh! 689 00:27:03,710 --> 00:27:05,376 {\an8}I am supposed to be here, I’ve earned this spot. 690 00:27:05,410 --> 00:27:06,376 {\an8}Woo. 691 00:27:06,410 --> 00:27:08,309 {\an8}These heads gotta roll. 692 00:27:08,343 --> 00:27:09,476 {\an8}Oh! 693 00:27:09,510 --> 00:27:10,343 {\an8}A showdown! 694 00:27:10,376 --> 00:27:11,977 {\an8}A comedy corral. 695 00:27:12,010 --> 00:27:14,176 {\an8}- [Caroline] Grab his ass! - [K. Trevor] Grab his ass! 696 00:27:14,209 --> 00:27:15,543 {\an8}[Jay] Off with his head. 697 00:27:15,576 --> 00:27:16,977 {\an8}[Mae] Finish him! 698 00:27:17,010 --> 00:27:19,043 {\an8}[Jay] You are the Last One Laughing. 699 00:27:19,076 --> 00:27:21,043 {\an8}[shouting] 700 00:27:21,076 --> 00:27:24,043 ♪