1
00:00:17,443 --> 00:00:20,010
♪
2
00:00:26,643 --> 00:00:31,510
♪ I like delicious
cheese sandwiches ♪
3
00:00:31,543 --> 00:00:33,243
They’re great.
4
00:00:33,276 --> 00:00:37,943
[Tom] ♪ I like
delicious cheese sandwiches ♪
5
00:00:37,977 --> 00:00:39,510
Oh, that’s a laugh.
Right?
6
00:00:39,543 --> 00:00:40,910
Oh, yeah.
[alarm sounds]
7
00:00:42,309 --> 00:00:45,176
[Colin]
Oh, what? What?
8
00:00:45,209 --> 00:00:46,376
Dropping like flies!
9
00:00:49,109 --> 00:00:50,309
[Jon]
Uh oh!
10
00:00:50,343 --> 00:00:51,810
[Tom] I don’t think my
guitar was in tune!
11
00:00:55,209 --> 00:00:59,010
[Jay] So, um, wow.
Do you know?
12
00:00:59,043 --> 00:01:02,877
Let’s take a look.
Let’s... let’s roll that clip!
13
00:01:02,910 --> 00:01:06,010
♪ I like delicious
cheese sandwiches ♪
14
00:01:06,043 --> 00:01:08,376
[Jay laughs]
15
00:01:08,410 --> 00:01:09,576
[Brandon]
They’re great.
16
00:01:09,610 --> 00:01:14,010
♪ I like delicious
cheese sandwiches ♪
17
00:01:14,043 --> 00:01:17,043
[Mae laughs]
18
00:01:17,076 --> 00:01:18,010
Oh Mae!
19
00:01:18,043 --> 00:01:18,777
[Mae & Jay laugh]
20
00:01:18,810 --> 00:01:19,977
It was hard to pick up!
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00:01:20,010 --> 00:01:21,676
I knew what would
get me would be proximity.
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00:01:21,710 --> 00:01:23,376
It was subtle
but it was a laugh.
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00:01:23,410 --> 00:01:24,877
[groans]
It wasn’t subtle dude!
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00:01:24,910 --> 00:01:26,209
So that is our second, uh,
25
00:01:26,243 --> 00:01:28,276
red card of the game,
ladies and gentlemen.
26
00:01:28,309 --> 00:01:30,576
Look at this, look at
this look of disappointment.
27
00:01:30,610 --> 00:01:32,977
I saw the weakness with
the cheese sandwich thing.
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00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:34,576
- Awww.
- I had to.
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00:01:34,610 --> 00:01:36,143
I mean...
It was a matter of time.
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00:01:36,176 --> 00:01:36,943
Oh, we’ll see you soon.
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00:01:36,977 --> 00:01:38,910
Good luck!
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00:01:38,943 --> 00:01:41,443
♪ Delicious cheese sandwiches ♪
33
00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:44,076
♪ Delicious cheese
sandwiches ♪
34
00:01:44,109 --> 00:01:46,810
♪ Delicious cheese sandwiches ♪
35
00:01:46,843 --> 00:01:48,276
♪ Delicious cheese
sandwiches ♪
36
00:01:48,309 --> 00:01:49,510
♪ Goodbye Mae ♪
37
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,676
♪ Have a nice day ♪
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00:01:51,710 --> 00:01:54,143
So listen...
Uh, thoughts?
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00:01:54,176 --> 00:01:55,810
What are you,
what are you feeling?
40
00:01:55,843 --> 00:01:58,143
I’m drenched in sweat.
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00:01:58,176 --> 00:01:59,243
I laughed.
42
00:02:02,043 --> 00:02:04,143
The absurdity of the
situation and then Tom just...
43
00:02:04,176 --> 00:02:06,676
{\an8}I knew. As soon as
he started repeating
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00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:09,676
delicious cheese sandwich.
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00:02:09,710 --> 00:02:13,309
Ahh, I just lost it. Ugh!
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[Jay] Mae Martin is the second
person eliminated and
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00:02:16,843 --> 00:02:19,209
the first casualty of Tom
Green’s twisted genius.
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00:02:19,243 --> 00:02:20,576
Eight comedians are left.
49
00:02:22,076 --> 00:02:23,043
It’s still blue, right?
We can still...
50
00:02:23,076 --> 00:02:24,109
- Yeah.
- Smile?
51
00:02:24,143 --> 00:02:25,276
Yeah. We can still smile.
Have fun.
52
00:02:25,309 --> 00:02:27,743
Smile. Enjoy.
Smile. Relax.
53
00:02:27,777 --> 00:02:30,076
Be cordial with
one another.
54
00:02:30,109 --> 00:02:31,743
I feel good that
I can smile for a minute.
55
00:02:31,777 --> 00:02:32,743
It’s nice.
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00:02:32,777 --> 00:02:36,076
Enjoy smiling for a moment.
[sighs]
57
00:02:36,109 --> 00:02:37,410
Oh my gosh.
58
00:02:37,443 --> 00:02:39,743
Your face is so cute
when you’re about to laugh.
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00:02:39,777 --> 00:02:41,576
Like I spent the
entire time on the edge.
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00:02:41,610 --> 00:02:42,843
[Caroline laughs]
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00:02:42,877 --> 00:02:44,209
I don’t know
how they’re doing it.
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00:02:44,243 --> 00:02:45,810
Here we go and...
63
00:02:45,843 --> 00:02:46,843
[horn sounds]
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00:02:46,877 --> 00:02:48,143
[Dave]
There we go.
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00:02:48,176 --> 00:02:50,043
The musical cue they
could afford to pay for.
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00:02:51,810 --> 00:02:52,910
[Jay] Alright, so how do
you guys think
67
00:02:52,943 --> 00:02:54,410
this is going to play out?
68
00:02:54,443 --> 00:02:56,543
I don’t think Dave
is going to laugh at anybody.
69
00:02:56,576 --> 00:02:59,977
Dave lives in a sort of
quasi giggle, at all times.
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00:03:00,010 --> 00:03:01,209
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
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00:03:01,243 --> 00:03:02,610
[Jay]
Lajoie’s a dark horse, though.
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00:03:02,643 --> 00:03:03,476
Oh, do you think?
73
00:03:03,510 --> 00:03:04,710
Yeah.
74
00:03:04,743 --> 00:03:06,076
I think Tom’s gonna win.
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00:03:06,109 --> 00:03:09,710
I’ve seen Tom do insane
things with a straight face.
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00:03:09,743 --> 00:03:10,943
[Catherine]
I never thought he was more
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00:03:10,977 --> 00:03:12,376
attractive than he is now.
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00:03:12,410 --> 00:03:13,777
Is he crazy?
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00:03:13,810 --> 00:03:14,643
I assume.
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00:03:14,676 --> 00:03:16,443
[Mae]
I assume. Yeah.
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00:03:16,476 --> 00:03:21,343
- [train whistle]
- [clock beeps]
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00:03:21,376 --> 00:03:22,777
[Jon] At this point...
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00:03:22,810 --> 00:03:26,343
{\an8}I’m starting to feel
pretty good because
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00:03:26,376 --> 00:03:29,877
{\an8}I’ve lasted this long
but everyone’s dangerous.
85
00:03:30,977 --> 00:03:32,176
[Jon]
Oh, hey!
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00:03:32,209 --> 00:03:33,610
[Debra]
You look pretty.
87
00:03:33,643 --> 00:03:37,376
[Jon] Dave, Tom Green
and Colin have been
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making me laugh
my whole life
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and I’ve never tried
to not laugh
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00:03:42,076 --> 00:03:43,877
when they were
making me laugh.
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00:03:43,910 --> 00:03:45,943
And so I’m in
a room with them and
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00:03:45,977 --> 00:03:47,443
I’m supposed to not laugh...
93
00:03:47,476 --> 00:03:48,476
Well, what do I do?
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00:03:49,610 --> 00:03:51,510
It’s a weird, weird...
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00:03:51,543 --> 00:03:53,309
situation to be in.
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00:03:56,309 --> 00:03:57,643
I’m... I’m gonna do a bit.
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00:03:57,676 --> 00:03:58,743
- Ok!
- Oh my gosh...
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00:03:58,777 --> 00:04:00,743
That I hope amuses you.
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00:04:00,777 --> 00:04:02,276
- [Jon] Ok.
- Oh...
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00:04:02,309 --> 00:04:03,476
Oh good, here we go.
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00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:04,877
This is what we need!
102
00:04:04,910 --> 00:04:06,443
Where did
you come from?
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00:04:06,476 --> 00:04:07,710
I was right here.
104
00:04:07,743 --> 00:04:10,410
But was that little
secret door there all along?
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00:04:10,443 --> 00:04:11,376
Yeah.
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00:04:11,410 --> 00:04:12,410
Really?
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00:04:12,443 --> 00:04:15,743
Alright, this will be
a scene from my,
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00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:17,109
uh, favourite
horror movie.
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00:04:17,143 --> 00:04:19,176
Ok.
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00:04:19,209 --> 00:04:20,276
Imagine it’s black and white.
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00:04:20,309 --> 00:04:21,510
- Ok.
- Alright.
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Hold on, hold on.
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- Alright. Oh!
- There.
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This sounds great.
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00:04:26,643 --> 00:04:28,243
Suzy.
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You know I love
you very much.
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Oh... it’s a full
moon tonight.
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Oh my God.
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00:04:34,543 --> 00:04:37,343
[Colin] There’s something
I’ve got to tell you.
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00:04:37,376 --> 00:04:39,843
A few years ago when
I was in Pennsylvania,
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I was walking along the
forest and I was bitten.
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I was bitten by a squirrel.
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00:04:46,843 --> 00:04:48,410
But it wasn’t any
ordinary squirrel.
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It was a cursed squirrel.
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And now whenever
there’s a full moon,
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00:04:54,576 --> 00:04:56,877
I become that...
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00:04:56,910 --> 00:05:01,343
[moans and groans]
128
00:05:02,476 --> 00:05:06,109
[groaning]
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00:05:06,143 --> 00:05:08,410
- [Jay laughs]
- Oh my God!
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00:05:08,443 --> 00:05:14,109
[Colin] Mony, Mo, Mooo,
mooney, money, mooney.
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00:05:14,143 --> 00:05:18,410
[howling]
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00:05:21,777 --> 00:05:25,143
[Jay laughs]
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00:05:25,176 --> 00:05:30,710
[squirrel noises]
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00:05:30,743 --> 00:05:32,676
Think unhappy thoughts.
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00:05:32,710 --> 00:05:35,643
[squirrel noises]
136
00:05:35,676 --> 00:05:36,943
[sighs]
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00:05:36,977 --> 00:05:39,276
{\an8}A cursed squirrel.
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00:05:39,309 --> 00:05:40,910
{\an8}It’s so dumb.
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00:05:43,143 --> 00:05:44,610
[laughs]
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00:05:44,643 --> 00:05:47,176
The outfit.
That stupid thing,
141
00:05:47,209 --> 00:05:50,043
is the funniest thing
I had ever seen.
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00:05:50,076 --> 00:05:52,676
The only way I could
keep from laughing is
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00:05:52,710 --> 00:05:55,676
to literally chew
on my own lips.
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00:05:55,710 --> 00:05:56,710
[smacks lips]
145
00:05:57,777 --> 00:05:59,343
Uh oh...
146
00:05:59,376 --> 00:06:00,276
Look at Deb.
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00:06:00,309 --> 00:06:02,043
[Jay laughs]
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00:06:02,076 --> 00:06:03,343
[squirrel noises]
149
00:06:04,877 --> 00:06:07,143
Oh boy.
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00:06:07,176 --> 00:06:08,443
[squirrel noises]
151
00:06:08,476 --> 00:06:11,510
[Jon] The were-squirrel...
it is so funny.
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00:06:11,543 --> 00:06:16,043
So all I’m doing is,
uh, puckering my lips and
153
00:06:16,076 --> 00:06:20,576
for some reason also widening
your eyes is helpful.
154
00:06:22,710 --> 00:06:25,576
- [squirrel noises]
- Uh huh. Yeah.
155
00:06:25,610 --> 00:06:27,576
No, no, no, that’s
what I was thinking.
156
00:06:27,610 --> 00:06:28,743
[squirrel noises]
157
00:06:28,777 --> 00:06:30,076
That’s what I was
thinking yeah.
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00:06:30,109 --> 00:06:31,410
[Tom] Something
about absurdity and
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00:06:31,443 --> 00:06:34,076
{\an8}silliness especially
when it’s Colin.
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00:06:34,109 --> 00:06:36,343
{\an8}I’m kinda having a hard
time keeping a straight face.
161
00:06:36,376 --> 00:06:38,777
- [squirrel noises]
- Uh huh. Uh huh.
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00:06:38,810 --> 00:06:39,977
[Jay laughs]
163
00:06:40,010 --> 00:06:41,676
I mean, look at Tom.
Look at Tom’s face.
164
00:06:42,843 --> 00:06:44,843
Yep.
165
00:06:44,877 --> 00:06:46,176
Stupid.
166
00:06:46,209 --> 00:06:47,443
[laughs]
167
00:06:47,476 --> 00:06:49,443
[Jay] Trevor, the big
man, is in big trouble.
168
00:06:51,643 --> 00:06:53,476
That feels nice.
I like it.
169
00:06:53,510 --> 00:06:54,743
Oh boy.
170
00:06:55,810 --> 00:06:57,076
Thank you. And scene!
171
00:06:57,109 --> 00:06:58,576
[Everyone claps]
172
00:06:58,610 --> 00:06:59,710
[Tom] Oh boy!
Wow! You’re uh...
173
00:06:59,743 --> 00:07:01,043
Jesus...
174
00:07:01,076 --> 00:07:02,376
That was amazing.
175
00:07:02,410 --> 00:07:05,176
That was the closest
I’ve come, uh, so far today.
176
00:07:05,209 --> 00:07:06,910
[Debra] Colin Mochrie,
he is very absurd...
177
00:07:06,943 --> 00:07:08,176
Woo.
178
00:07:08,209 --> 00:07:09,610
[Debra] And that was very
hard for me because...
179
00:07:09,643 --> 00:07:11,010
I’m a laugher!
180
00:07:11,043 --> 00:07:13,043
{\an8}I am. And I’m not good,
like, like this is me being,
181
00:07:13,076 --> 00:07:15,977
{\an8}this is my poker face.
182
00:07:16,010 --> 00:07:17,943
{\an8}[laughs]
183
00:07:17,977 --> 00:07:19,877
How long did that last?
184
00:07:19,910 --> 00:07:23,710
[clock beeps]
185
00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:26,043
Making some
delicious bread balls.
186
00:07:26,076 --> 00:07:26,943
I’m terrible
at laughing so
187
00:07:26,977 --> 00:07:28,510
I think that’s my hiccup.
188
00:07:28,543 --> 00:07:29,610
{\an8}I laugh by myself.
189
00:07:29,643 --> 00:07:30,510
{\an8}I laugh in the shower.
190
00:07:30,543 --> 00:07:31,843
{\an8}I laugh all the time.
191
00:07:31,877 --> 00:07:34,209
So I’m just
gonna focus and,
192
00:07:34,243 --> 00:07:37,576
take this as seriously
as possible.
193
00:07:37,610 --> 00:07:40,710
You have to really
put effort and care into it.
194
00:07:40,743 --> 00:07:42,977
’Cause people say "Oh, I cannot
taste the difference".
195
00:07:45,710 --> 00:07:47,410
That’s the thing about
the bread ingredient...
196
00:07:47,443 --> 00:07:50,977
[Jay]
Hey, who’s Andrew talking to?
197
00:07:51,010 --> 00:07:52,943
So many possibilities to it.
198
00:07:52,977 --> 00:07:55,810
So I take one of these,
roll it up here because no one
199
00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:57,543
is going to complain if
there’s [giggles]
200
00:07:57,576 --> 00:07:58,276
a little bit of
extra cheese.
201
00:07:58,309 --> 00:08:01,343
Oh, for fuck sake!
202
00:08:02,777 --> 00:08:05,143
Andrew has not
cracked a smile.
203
00:08:05,176 --> 00:08:06,943
He’s going to be
a tough cookie.
204
00:08:06,977 --> 00:08:08,276
He’s pretending
we’re all racist,
205
00:08:08,309 --> 00:08:09,676
that’s what
keeps him alive.
206
00:08:14,510 --> 00:08:16,209
Pretending, am I right?
207
00:08:16,243 --> 00:08:17,410
[K. Trevor laughs]
208
00:08:17,443 --> 00:08:19,810
Ooooohhhh!
209
00:08:19,843 --> 00:08:20,910
You wanna hit the red?
210
00:08:20,943 --> 00:08:22,443
Yeah! Can I?
211
00:08:22,476 --> 00:08:25,443
[alarm rings]
212
00:08:25,476 --> 00:08:27,309
There’s a
possibility it was me.
213
00:08:27,343 --> 00:08:28,343
Uh oh.
214
00:08:28,376 --> 00:08:29,576
I’m gonna go
lay down the law.
215
00:08:31,443 --> 00:08:32,810
Goddamn it.
216
00:08:32,843 --> 00:08:33,977
[Tom] I might have
broke on that one.
217
00:08:34,010 --> 00:08:35,676
I’m not sure.
218
00:08:37,510 --> 00:08:39,743
Bad news everybody,
I caught more people
219
00:08:39,777 --> 00:08:41,510
in the act of losing.
220
00:08:41,543 --> 00:08:42,943
- Oh no!
- Oh!
221
00:08:42,977 --> 00:08:44,176
Oh boy,
oh boy, oh boy.
222
00:08:44,209 --> 00:08:45,510
Lot of guilty consciences.
223
00:08:45,543 --> 00:08:46,410
Mmm hmm.
Mmm hmm.
224
00:08:46,443 --> 00:08:47,410
Let’s take a look at this TV.
225
00:08:47,443 --> 00:08:49,043
Hmmm.
226
00:08:49,076 --> 00:08:50,476
He’s pretending
we’re all racist
227
00:08:50,510 --> 00:08:51,443
that’s what
keeps him alive.
228
00:08:54,076 --> 00:08:55,443
Pretending, am I right?
229
00:08:58,076 --> 00:08:59,143
[Jay laughs]
230
00:08:59,176 --> 00:09:00,376
[Colin] Oh, you hung
on for so long.
231
00:09:00,410 --> 00:09:02,710
[Andrew and Jay laugh]
232
00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:05,910
Comedy is about
catching someone by surprise.
233
00:09:05,943 --> 00:09:09,143
I wasn’t expecting it
and it got me.
234
00:09:09,176 --> 00:09:11,010
It got me good,
it got me clean.
235
00:09:11,043 --> 00:09:13,343
- That’s a yellow, Trevor.
- Yep.
236
00:09:13,376 --> 00:09:14,543
Yep.
237
00:09:14,576 --> 00:09:15,877
[sigh]
238
00:09:15,910 --> 00:09:19,543
But wait!
There’s more.
239
00:09:21,943 --> 00:09:23,276
So many possibilities to it.
240
00:09:23,309 --> 00:09:25,109
So I take one of these, roll
it up here because no one
241
00:09:25,143 --> 00:09:27,810
is going to complain if
there’s [giggles]
242
00:09:27,843 --> 00:09:28,877
a little bit of
extra cheese.
243
00:09:31,510 --> 00:09:33,010
My yellow card...
244
00:09:33,043 --> 00:09:35,143
I hope it was
worth it to you.
245
00:09:35,176 --> 00:09:39,376
My yellow card
was of my own stupidity.
246
00:09:39,410 --> 00:09:43,143
I was doing a bit
only for myself
247
00:09:43,176 --> 00:09:46,810
and I made myself laugh.
248
00:09:46,843 --> 00:09:49,209
This is a yellow for you.
249
00:09:49,243 --> 00:09:50,877
Self yellow!
250
00:09:50,910 --> 00:09:52,843
[band plays]
251
00:09:52,877 --> 00:09:54,043
Phew!
252
00:09:55,710 --> 00:09:56,943
You gotta
really watch it, eh?
253
00:09:56,977 --> 00:09:58,877
You gotta watch it.
254
00:09:58,910 --> 00:10:00,610
Terrible reason
to get a yellow.
255
00:10:00,643 --> 00:10:02,777
[Jon] That was a murder
suicide right there.
256
00:10:04,777 --> 00:10:06,476
[Jay] K. Trevor and
Andrew get hit
257
00:10:06,510 --> 00:10:08,209
with yellow cards
and join Debra and
258
00:10:08,243 --> 00:10:09,676
Dave in the
danger zone.
259
00:10:11,943 --> 00:10:14,543
- [horn sounds]
- Aww shit.
260
00:10:16,376 --> 00:10:19,676
[clock beeps]
261
00:10:22,143 --> 00:10:23,510
Tom, what are you making?
262
00:10:23,543 --> 00:10:29,376
I am making a delicious
grilled cheese sandwich.
263
00:10:29,410 --> 00:10:30,109
Oh!
264
00:10:30,143 --> 00:10:31,476
Oh God, here we go.
265
00:10:31,510 --> 00:10:33,710
Oh my God, he’s making
cheese sandwiches again.
266
00:10:33,743 --> 00:10:35,076
I already had one,
it was very good,
267
00:10:35,109 --> 00:10:36,076
it was very delicious.
268
00:10:36,109 --> 00:10:40,076
Yes. I uh. If... if...
269
00:10:40,109 --> 00:10:42,176
Almost turned it around
on me there Colin.
270
00:10:42,209 --> 00:10:43,376
[Colin]
Oh.
271
00:10:43,410 --> 00:10:45,910
Almost used my own
delicious cheese sandwich
272
00:10:45,943 --> 00:10:47,109
against me there.
273
00:10:47,143 --> 00:10:50,010
Careful, Tom.
Dangerously close to the edge.
274
00:10:50,043 --> 00:10:54,010
Del... Delicious
cheese sandwich.
275
00:10:56,777 --> 00:10:59,043
{\an8}There’s nothing
a comedian finds funnier
276
00:10:59,076 --> 00:11:01,543
{\an8}than having their own
material told back to them.
277
00:11:01,576 --> 00:11:04,443
{\an8}So I thought, "Oh!
This could be a weakness."
278
00:11:04,476 --> 00:11:05,743
Mmm hmm.
Mmm hmm. Yeah.
279
00:11:05,777 --> 00:11:08,176
You might have
found my kryptonite.
280
00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:11,643
Delicious...
cheese...
281
00:11:11,676 --> 00:11:14,109
[Tom] Mmm hmm.
Mmm hmm.
282
00:11:14,143 --> 00:11:15,676
Deb is like,
in a constant laugh.
283
00:11:15,710 --> 00:11:17,076
Yeah. Yeah, she’s fucked.
284
00:11:17,109 --> 00:11:18,810
I do not like
her chances.
285
00:11:18,843 --> 00:11:20,410
Mmm.
286
00:11:20,443 --> 00:11:23,276
What would, uh, "delicious
cheese sandwich" in French be?
287
00:11:23,309 --> 00:11:25,643
Sandwich au fromage délicieux.
288
00:11:25,676 --> 00:11:27,510
- Sandwich!
- Sandwich!
289
00:11:27,543 --> 00:11:28,343
Well... actually I
embellished that a little bit.
290
00:11:28,376 --> 00:11:29,610
Délicieux...
291
00:11:29,643 --> 00:11:32,309
It would be eh,
sandwich au fromage câlisse.
292
00:11:32,343 --> 00:11:33,910
[Colin mumbles in fake French]
293
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,977
Uh, no.
It’s sandwich au fromage.
294
00:11:36,010 --> 00:11:37,576
[Colin mumbles in fake French]
295
00:11:37,610 --> 00:11:39,010
Close but you gotta,
like make it, like...
296
00:11:39,043 --> 00:11:40,176
Do I sound
a little Latin?
297
00:11:40,209 --> 00:11:43,043
Eh, crismo..
coup de morceaux.
298
00:11:43,076 --> 00:11:45,543
- Uh, crismo. Crispo fromage.
- Yeah.
299
00:11:45,576 --> 00:11:48,376
[French accent]
Tout la fruit!
300
00:11:48,410 --> 00:11:51,910
Here we go, I would be
laughing if I was in there now.
301
00:11:53,309 --> 00:11:54,777
I was going to say
jambo but that’s ham.
302
00:11:54,810 --> 00:11:57,076
Well, yeah, you’re saying
it way too nicely.
303
00:11:57,109 --> 00:12:00,176
- Oh. Jambo.
- Jambo? Jambo?
304
00:12:00,209 --> 00:12:01,576
- Jambo?
- No, no Jambon!
305
00:12:01,610 --> 00:12:02,977
[villain accent]
My name is Jambo,
306
00:12:03,010 --> 00:12:07,510
I’m here to take over
the La Molson Labatt factory!
307
00:12:07,543 --> 00:12:09,543
[Jay laughs]
308
00:12:09,576 --> 00:12:10,810
It’s like
a villain right?
309
00:12:10,843 --> 00:12:12,309
I think it
was George Lopez.
310
00:12:12,343 --> 00:12:13,810
No, no, no, no, no.
311
00:12:13,843 --> 00:12:15,043
George is like...
[George Lopez impersonation]
312
00:12:15,076 --> 00:12:17,710
Top of the mornin’ to ya
I’m George Lopez.
313
00:12:17,743 --> 00:12:18,977
Top of the mornin’ to ya?
314
00:12:21,476 --> 00:12:24,076
Je suis un homme.
315
00:12:24,109 --> 00:12:25,309
[Jon laughs]
316
00:12:25,343 --> 00:12:27,109
[laughing]
317
00:12:27,143 --> 00:12:28,977
Oh my God.
318
00:12:29,010 --> 00:12:30,109
Shit!
319
00:12:30,143 --> 00:12:31,743
- The second he did it...
- He realised right away!
320
00:12:31,777 --> 00:12:33,043
There’s another one!
321
00:12:33,076 --> 00:12:34,076
[alarm rings]
322
00:12:36,510 --> 00:12:40,643
Uh oh!
Uh oh. Uh oh.
323
00:12:42,643 --> 00:12:43,877
What’s it gonna be?
324
00:12:48,010 --> 00:12:49,043
Ok.
325
00:12:52,543 --> 00:12:55,443
One of you lost your shit but
we’ve managed to find it.
326
00:12:57,943 --> 00:13:00,243
I don’t quite know what
that means but...
327
00:13:00,276 --> 00:13:02,643
Um, watch the TV.
328
00:13:02,676 --> 00:13:04,309
I was going to say
jambo but that’s ham.
329
00:13:04,343 --> 00:13:06,676
Well yeah, you’re saying
it way too nicely.
330
00:13:06,710 --> 00:13:08,543
[villain accent]
My name is Jambo,
331
00:13:08,576 --> 00:13:10,309
I’m here to take over!
332
00:13:10,343 --> 00:13:11,676
[Colin] I think it
was George Lopez.
333
00:13:11,710 --> 00:13:12,910
[Andrew] George is like...
[George Lopez impersonation]
334
00:13:12,943 --> 00:13:15,376
Top of the mornin’ to ya
I’m George Lopez
335
00:13:15,410 --> 00:13:16,910
Top of the mornin’ to ya?
336
00:13:18,743 --> 00:13:21,376
Je suis un homme.
337
00:13:23,576 --> 00:13:25,243
[laughs]
338
00:13:28,977 --> 00:13:31,043
[Jay] That’s a yellow
for Jon Lajoie.
339
00:13:31,076 --> 00:13:32,877
Okay. Thank you. Thank you.
340
00:13:32,910 --> 00:13:34,543
Wait. But that’s not all.
341
00:13:34,576 --> 00:13:35,943
- Oh no!
- Oh okay.
342
00:13:35,977 --> 00:13:38,576
- Somebody else sucks, too.
- Shit.
343
00:13:40,510 --> 00:13:41,476
Watch the TV.
344
00:13:43,376 --> 00:13:44,576
{\an8}Tom, what are you making?
345
00:13:44,610 --> 00:13:46,943
{\an8}A... Delicious...
346
00:13:46,977 --> 00:13:49,610
{\an8}Grilled cheese sandwich.
347
00:13:49,643 --> 00:13:51,143
{\an8}Oh God, here we go.
348
00:13:51,176 --> 00:13:54,676
{\an8}Delicious cheese sandwich.
349
00:13:54,710 --> 00:13:56,143
{\an8}[Debra laugh]
350
00:13:57,810 --> 00:14:00,910
- [Jay laughs]
- No!
351
00:14:00,943 --> 00:14:02,543
[Jay]
So as I understand it,
352
00:14:02,576 --> 00:14:04,810
that means you have
a fucking red card.
353
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:06,010
Oh! Oh!
354
00:14:06,043 --> 00:14:07,977
Awww.
355
00:14:08,010 --> 00:14:09,376
[Debra]
Fine!
356
00:14:09,410 --> 00:14:11,109
- [Jay] Debra!
- Alright, bitches.
357
00:14:11,143 --> 00:14:12,843
Time to say your goodbyes
and then join me in the lounge.
358
00:14:13,910 --> 00:14:15,243
I knew it
was going to be you.
359
00:14:15,276 --> 00:14:17,309
It was Colin!
Damn him!
360
00:14:17,343 --> 00:14:19,176
He’s just so silly.
361
00:14:19,209 --> 00:14:20,910
- Ahhh!
- Yay!
362
00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:21,843
Honestly, without
being totally cheesy
363
00:14:21,877 --> 00:14:23,243
like there
was no losing.
364
00:14:23,276 --> 00:14:25,510
Like, we knew we were still
going to be able to have fun
365
00:14:25,543 --> 00:14:26,877
but I knew he’d be the
one to take me out.
366
00:14:26,910 --> 00:14:28,810
I knew it. Ugh!
367
00:14:28,843 --> 00:14:31,610
[Jay] Debra’s red card has her
on a one way ticket to the lodge
368
00:14:31,643 --> 00:14:34,810
thanks to Colin Mochrie
who also pushed Jon
369
00:14:34,843 --> 00:14:35,977
onto thin ice with
a yellow card.
370
00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:40,176
Hey! This is nice!
371
00:14:40,209 --> 00:14:41,176
[Mae]
Right?
372
00:14:41,209 --> 00:14:42,510
- [Carolina] Hi, hon.
- Oh my gosh.
373
00:14:42,543 --> 00:14:44,510
So now you all
have to inch down.
374
00:14:44,543 --> 00:14:46,676
Do we get another sixteen
hours in the blue light?
375
00:14:46,710 --> 00:14:49,376
[laughs]
376
00:14:51,410 --> 00:14:52,710
And....
377
00:14:52,743 --> 00:14:54,109
[horn sounds]
378
00:14:54,143 --> 00:14:55,777
There we go!
379
00:14:55,810 --> 00:14:57,676
Now it’s a
real sausage party.
380
00:14:57,710 --> 00:15:00,676
[laughs]
381
00:15:00,710 --> 00:15:04,276
[clock beeps]
382
00:15:04,309 --> 00:15:05,343
Let’s do it.
383
00:15:05,376 --> 00:15:07,376
Oh, shit.
Here we go.
384
00:15:07,410 --> 00:15:08,743
Brandon’s ready
to do his bit.
385
00:15:08,777 --> 00:15:10,410
This better be explosive.
386
00:15:10,443 --> 00:15:11,977
[Caroline]
It better be Tina Turner.
387
00:15:12,010 --> 00:15:15,410
I’m gonna do something.
388
00:15:15,443 --> 00:15:16,476
Oh, this is cute.
389
00:15:16,510 --> 00:15:17,843
I like this.
I like this.
390
00:15:17,877 --> 00:15:20,010
Human contact.
391
00:15:20,043 --> 00:15:22,476
[Brandon] I think
my comedy’s for everyone.
392
00:15:22,510 --> 00:15:25,043
{\an8}I know that maybe it’s not
every straight white
393
00:15:25,076 --> 00:15:28,176
{\an8}man’s cup of tea but
let me just try and
394
00:15:28,209 --> 00:15:30,343
see what happens, see
if I can get them.
395
00:15:30,376 --> 00:15:33,343
Ok!
Hello everyone!
396
00:15:33,376 --> 00:15:34,109
[crowd cheers]
397
00:15:34,143 --> 00:15:36,143
I am Brandon Ash-Mohammed.
398
00:15:36,176 --> 00:15:37,309
[crowd cheers]
399
00:15:37,343 --> 00:15:38,443
All right!
400
00:15:38,476 --> 00:15:40,943
But you may know me
as the girl of size
401
00:15:40,977 --> 00:15:43,309
who always get the guys.
402
00:15:43,343 --> 00:15:45,376
A lot of people think
that if they wanna win
403
00:15:45,410 --> 00:15:48,643
Prince Charming they gotta
lose a few pounds, right?
404
00:15:48,676 --> 00:15:49,777
I’ve heard that.
405
00:15:49,810 --> 00:15:52,343
- I say fuck that.
- Yeah!
406
00:15:52,376 --> 00:15:55,410
So today I’m gonna show you
a couple ways to eat,
407
00:15:55,443 --> 00:15:57,910
that’ll make the men skeet.
408
00:15:57,943 --> 00:15:59,510
[bell rings]
Mmm. Mmm.
409
00:15:59,543 --> 00:16:01,076
Skeet! Skeet! Skeet!
410
00:16:01,109 --> 00:16:02,076
[Brandon]
Boys, get your tissues ready.
411
00:16:02,109 --> 00:16:02,743
Get your tissues ready. Ok.
412
00:16:02,777 --> 00:16:04,943
Is skeet like jizz?
413
00:16:04,977 --> 00:16:06,343
It’s, uh, pre-ejaculate.
414
00:16:06,376 --> 00:16:07,476
Pre-ejaculate! Ah!
415
00:16:07,510 --> 00:16:09,376
[laughs]
416
00:16:09,410 --> 00:16:11,143
Skeet means pre-ejaculate?
417
00:16:11,176 --> 00:16:13,276
[laughs]
418
00:16:13,309 --> 00:16:15,010
So for our first move
what you’re gonna need
419
00:16:15,043 --> 00:16:18,010
is chips and uh...
and a chair.
420
00:16:18,043 --> 00:16:19,376
You can use any snack.
421
00:16:19,410 --> 00:16:21,476
So what you’re gonna do is
sit seductively like...
422
00:16:21,510 --> 00:16:22,476
[moans]
423
00:16:22,510 --> 00:16:23,543
Yes, daddy!
424
00:16:23,576 --> 00:16:24,543
Ooh, this seat is so hard.
425
00:16:24,576 --> 00:16:26,010
- Yes!
- Oh my God.
426
00:16:26,043 --> 00:16:27,376
Then you’re gonna
drop it like it’s hot.
427
00:16:27,410 --> 00:16:28,676
- [Tom] Uh-huh.
- And then bam!
428
00:16:28,710 --> 00:16:30,010
Rub that chub.
429
00:16:30,043 --> 00:16:32,243
Rub that chub.
Rub that chub.
430
00:16:32,276 --> 00:16:33,543
Rub it!
431
00:16:33,576 --> 00:16:35,977
Not a dry pair of
jockies in the house.
432
00:16:39,109 --> 00:16:40,176
[Jay laughs]
433
00:16:40,209 --> 00:16:41,410
Our next and final move,
434
00:16:41,443 --> 00:16:43,243
you’re gonna be at the club,
435
00:16:43,276 --> 00:16:45,010
you’re talking
to a hot guy whatever.
436
00:16:45,043 --> 00:16:46,376
Eating a banana.
437
00:16:46,410 --> 00:16:48,743
I often eat
bananas at the club.
438
00:16:48,777 --> 00:16:50,243
Maybe you drop
the banana and you...
439
00:16:50,276 --> 00:16:51,343
Uh-oh.
440
00:16:51,376 --> 00:16:52,076
And you’re like
I’m about fitness.
441
00:16:52,109 --> 00:16:53,309
[Jon] Yep.
442
00:16:53,343 --> 00:16:56,777
Fittin’ this right
in my mouth and BOOM!
443
00:16:56,810 --> 00:16:57,743
Whoa!
444
00:17:00,109 --> 00:17:01,576
{\an8}[Dave] There was a lot
of energy but
445
00:17:01,610 --> 00:17:03,376
{\an8}I’m too old to marvel
in anything.
446
00:17:03,410 --> 00:17:05,043
{\an8}I mean I saw
the moon landing.
447
00:17:05,076 --> 00:17:07,109
After that, nothing’s
really that marvelous.
448
00:17:07,143 --> 00:17:08,109
Boom.
449
00:17:08,143 --> 00:17:09,877
Not a dry pair. Of jockies.
450
00:17:09,910 --> 00:17:12,376
In. The. House.
451
00:17:12,410 --> 00:17:13,710
[K. Trevor]
This is insane.
452
00:17:13,743 --> 00:17:15,810
I’ve never been on a
Japanese game show before
453
00:17:15,843 --> 00:17:17,877
but... I imagine
this is as close
454
00:17:17,910 --> 00:17:19,676
we’re going to find
in this country.
455
00:17:19,710 --> 00:17:21,510
[laughs]
456
00:17:21,543 --> 00:17:22,510
Thank you.
457
00:17:22,543 --> 00:17:23,343
[crowd cheers & claps]
458
00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:24,343
- Thank you.
- Alright.
459
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:25,376
Alright.
460
00:17:25,410 --> 00:17:27,877
You put the
ass back in potassium.
461
00:17:27,910 --> 00:17:29,176
Thank you.
Thank you.
462
00:17:29,209 --> 00:17:33,943
This has been aerobics
for getting a row of dicks.
463
00:17:33,977 --> 00:17:36,443
[laughs]
464
00:17:36,476 --> 00:17:37,176
Thank you.
465
00:17:37,209 --> 00:17:38,610
Yeahhhh.
466
00:17:38,643 --> 00:17:40,076
All very
helpful information.
467
00:17:44,510 --> 00:17:45,743
Tom!
468
00:17:45,777 --> 00:17:47,376
[Caroline & Debra laugh]
469
00:17:47,410 --> 00:17:49,076
[Mae] Oh my God.
470
00:17:50,943 --> 00:17:53,109
I think I made Tom Green
question his sexuality
471
00:17:53,143 --> 00:17:54,877
and that’s what I wanted.
472
00:17:54,910 --> 00:17:56,209
That was the goal.
473
00:17:56,243 --> 00:17:57,443
That was something.
474
00:17:57,476 --> 00:17:58,777
That was something else.
475
00:17:58,810 --> 00:18:00,410
I’m gonna use
the bathroom real quick.
476
00:18:01,943 --> 00:18:04,510
[Jay] Ok. Hey guys.
Sorry to interrupt.
477
00:18:04,543 --> 00:18:05,643
Is anybody hungry?
478
00:18:05,676 --> 00:18:06,743
I would love lunch.
479
00:18:06,777 --> 00:18:08,109
It doesn’t stop
the clock, does it?
480
00:18:08,143 --> 00:18:09,343
It doesn’t stop the clock.
481
00:18:13,943 --> 00:18:14,977
[Andrew]
Oh our lunches.
482
00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:16,376
Mmm hmm.
483
00:18:16,410 --> 00:18:17,643
Bon Appetit.
484
00:18:20,410 --> 00:18:22,643
Do you think they’re going
to do anything with the lunches?
485
00:18:22,676 --> 00:18:24,543
Oh yeah,
funny, funny lunch.
486
00:18:24,576 --> 00:18:25,510
[Mae] Funny lunch.
487
00:18:25,543 --> 00:18:27,309
[laughs]
488
00:18:27,343 --> 00:18:28,910
[distant laughing]
489
00:18:33,176 --> 00:18:35,443
It’s amazing, I can
still hear Caroline.
490
00:18:35,476 --> 00:18:36,410
[laughs]
Yeah, I know!
491
00:18:36,443 --> 00:18:37,710
Even through the soundproofing.
492
00:18:38,977 --> 00:18:39,810
He smiled!
493
00:18:39,843 --> 00:18:40,576
Really?
494
00:18:40,610 --> 00:18:41,877
I can’t believe this.
495
00:18:41,910 --> 00:18:44,977
[alarm rings]
496
00:18:45,010 --> 00:18:46,243
Uh-oh.
497
00:18:46,276 --> 00:18:47,843
[Jay] They’ve all got
mouths full of food.
498
00:18:55,910 --> 00:18:59,543
So, this one blew my mind.
499
00:18:59,576 --> 00:19:02,309
This one, this one broke
my heart, I won’t lie.
500
00:19:02,343 --> 00:19:04,209
But the game doesn’t
stop even at lunch.
501
00:19:05,443 --> 00:19:08,710
Let’s watch.
502
00:19:08,743 --> 00:19:11,910
[distant laughs]
503
00:19:11,943 --> 00:19:13,877
{\an8}It’s amazing
I can still hear Caroline.
504
00:19:13,910 --> 00:19:15,076
{\an8}I know!
505
00:19:15,109 --> 00:19:16,743
[laughs]
506
00:19:18,610 --> 00:19:19,610
I forgot.
507
00:19:19,643 --> 00:19:20,743
[laughs]
508
00:19:20,777 --> 00:19:23,076
I totally forgot the one
rule of the show.
509
00:19:23,109 --> 00:19:24,843
[laughs]
510
00:19:24,877 --> 00:19:26,376
[Colin]
Well, that was stupid.
511
00:19:26,410 --> 00:19:28,543
That was me doing
that to me
512
00:19:28,576 --> 00:19:31,010
because I wasn’t focused
513
00:19:31,043 --> 00:19:32,209
and because of Caroline!
514
00:19:33,443 --> 00:19:34,843
So that’s...
that’s a yellow card.
515
00:19:34,877 --> 00:19:36,010
- Thank you.
- Oh.
516
00:19:36,043 --> 00:19:37,376
They say never meet your heroes.
517
00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:38,810
Wow.
518
00:19:38,843 --> 00:19:39,576
[band plays]
519
00:19:39,610 --> 00:19:40,576
It’s not over.
520
00:19:44,476 --> 00:19:45,643
Be better.
521
00:19:47,143 --> 00:19:48,743
Be better.
522
00:19:50,710 --> 00:19:53,309
[Jay] Now that’s
a lunch bag let down.
523
00:19:53,343 --> 00:19:56,977
Colin’s yellow card means
he joins Jon, Dave, Andrew and
524
00:19:57,010 --> 00:19:58,343
K. Trev on the
chopping block.
525
00:20:04,176 --> 00:20:05,476
What happened?
526
00:20:05,510 --> 00:20:07,676
I... I laughed.
You missed everything.
527
00:20:07,710 --> 00:20:09,343
Oh, Jay came in?
I missed the whole thing?
528
00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:10,977
Yeah. You missed
the whole thing.
529
00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:12,276
Oh!
530
00:20:12,309 --> 00:20:13,043
Were you showering?
531
00:20:13,076 --> 00:20:16,010
Well, I was gonna.
532
00:20:16,043 --> 00:20:17,043
I was gonna...
533
00:20:20,910 --> 00:20:22,243
Alright, I was jerking off.
534
00:20:22,276 --> 00:20:24,243
- Oh, ok.
- Oh boy!
535
00:20:24,276 --> 00:20:25,510
Hot.
536
00:20:25,543 --> 00:20:27,276
[laughs]
537
00:20:27,309 --> 00:20:29,243
[horn sounds]
538
00:20:29,276 --> 00:20:32,143
Here we go.
Now the game’s back on.
539
00:20:32,176 --> 00:20:35,476
[clock beeps]
540
00:20:35,510 --> 00:20:38,743
We’re gonna play
"Would you rather?"
541
00:20:38,777 --> 00:20:40,109
[Jon]
Ok, let’s do it.
542
00:20:40,143 --> 00:20:43,309
Or why don’t we just all
eat the blood pudding pops?
543
00:20:43,343 --> 00:20:44,777
[laughs]
544
00:20:44,810 --> 00:20:45,843
Shouldn’t they
have melted by now?
545
00:20:45,877 --> 00:20:46,843
They’ve congealed.
546
00:20:46,877 --> 00:20:48,643
- Ugh.
- Yuck.
547
00:20:48,676 --> 00:20:51,043
Was it actually,
black sausage?
548
00:20:51,076 --> 00:20:53,043
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
- Really? [gags]
549
00:20:53,076 --> 00:20:54,543
[Brandon] This is the first one,
would you rather
550
00:20:54,576 --> 00:20:57,443
be trapped in a romantic comedy
and never find love?
551
00:20:57,476 --> 00:20:59,443
Or trapped in a
gross out comedy,
552
00:20:59,476 --> 00:21:01,143
be pranked everyday for
the rest of your life?
553
00:21:01,176 --> 00:21:02,276
Gross out comedy.
554
00:21:02,309 --> 00:21:03,010
Pranked everyday for
the rest of my life.
555
00:21:03,043 --> 00:21:03,810
[Brandon]
Yeah.
556
00:21:03,843 --> 00:21:06,476
I have been trapped in that.
557
00:21:06,510 --> 00:21:07,476
I am trapped in that.
558
00:21:11,777 --> 00:21:14,510
[laughing]
559
00:21:14,543 --> 00:21:15,943
- That’s very good.
- [laughs]
560
00:21:15,977 --> 00:21:17,410
- [Mae] The blinking!
- [Jay] The blinking!
561
00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:19,243
None of
this is realistic.
562
00:21:19,276 --> 00:21:20,443
I mean it’ll never happen.
563
00:21:20,476 --> 00:21:22,610
Oh no, it’s realistic...
564
00:21:22,643 --> 00:21:23,676
That is Tom’s life.
565
00:21:23,710 --> 00:21:24,476
[Caroline laughs]
566
00:21:24,510 --> 00:21:25,743
Next one.
567
00:21:25,777 --> 00:21:29,676
Would you eat with your
butt or poop out your mouth?
568
00:21:29,710 --> 00:21:30,777
- Hmmm.
- Oh...
569
00:21:30,810 --> 00:21:32,209
Eat with the butt.
570
00:21:32,243 --> 00:21:33,343
I mean,
that’s just common sense.
571
00:21:33,376 --> 00:21:34,076
Yeah. Yeah.
572
00:21:34,109 --> 00:21:35,276
That’s a tough one.
573
00:21:35,309 --> 00:21:36,977
I think I’d like to just
do both of those things.
574
00:21:37,010 --> 00:21:38,676
Mmmm. Mmm.
575
00:21:38,710 --> 00:21:40,376
[laughs]
576
00:21:40,410 --> 00:21:41,543
[Brandon]
Let’s move on.
577
00:21:41,576 --> 00:21:42,977
Would you rather have
your tongue pierced
578
00:21:43,010 --> 00:21:45,476
or get a tramp stamp?
579
00:21:45,510 --> 00:21:46,743
Tramp stamp.
580
00:21:46,777 --> 00:21:48,543
Well, the tongue
piercing I hear heightens
581
00:21:48,576 --> 00:21:50,010
the experience
of a blowjob.
582
00:21:50,043 --> 00:21:51,443
Yeah.
583
00:21:51,476 --> 00:21:53,109
I dunno how me
having a tongue piercing
584
00:21:53,143 --> 00:21:55,743
would make me enjoy
a blowjob more.
585
00:21:56,877 --> 00:21:58,443
[Colin]
Oh, good one.
586
00:21:58,476 --> 00:21:59,676
- Alright.
- Alright.
587
00:21:59,710 --> 00:22:01,710
I didn’t need to conjure
that imagery in my head.
588
00:22:01,743 --> 00:22:03,576
Alright.
I was gonna say.
589
00:22:07,209 --> 00:22:08,276
I want Jon
to go back and sing.
590
00:22:08,309 --> 00:22:08,977
Wasn’t he going
to sing a song?
591
00:22:09,010 --> 00:22:10,043
Yeah.
592
00:22:10,076 --> 00:22:12,043
[Debra] Ok, he is,
he’s getting it.
593
00:22:12,076 --> 00:22:12,977
He’s getting it.
594
00:22:13,010 --> 00:22:14,176
- There we go.
- Here we go.
595
00:22:14,209 --> 00:22:15,943
Just a little
spontaneous little thing
596
00:22:15,977 --> 00:22:17,610
that I’m gonna do here.
597
00:22:17,643 --> 00:22:21,043
Uh, I believe it was
John A. MacDonald
598
00:22:21,076 --> 00:22:23,576
who once said
599
00:22:23,610 --> 00:22:27,476
we should
call our band "Metallica".
600
00:22:27,510 --> 00:22:30,543
[laughs]
601
00:22:30,576 --> 00:22:33,476
I’m actually a serious
musician, I’ve been writing,
602
00:22:33,510 --> 00:22:36,576
uh, songs since
I was, uh, very young.
603
00:22:36,610 --> 00:22:38,977
- Three months old actually.
- Wow.
604
00:22:39,010 --> 00:22:40,543
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
- Wow.
605
00:22:40,576 --> 00:22:41,443
It was a little,
little guitar.
606
00:22:41,476 --> 00:22:42,543
[Tom]
Yeah. Three months.
607
00:22:42,576 --> 00:22:45,243
[laughing]
608
00:22:45,276 --> 00:22:46,610
Three months old.
609
00:22:46,643 --> 00:22:50,977
♪ Da da da da ♪
610
00:22:51,010 --> 00:22:52,676
[Andrew] Jon operates
on a different level.
611
00:22:52,710 --> 00:22:55,343
His videos on YouTube
were such a big part of,
612
00:22:55,376 --> 00:22:57,543
like early Youtube
viral success.
613
00:22:57,576 --> 00:23:01,176
I know what this man is
capable of and that scares me.
614
00:23:01,209 --> 00:23:02,810
I would like to
share with you all
615
00:23:02,843 --> 00:23:05,209
the first song that
I ever wrote.
616
00:23:07,643 --> 00:23:09,977
Ok, here we go.
617
00:23:10,010 --> 00:23:13,243
♪ I’m really hungry mom ♪
618
00:23:15,710 --> 00:23:17,810
♪ That’s why
I’m freaking out ♪
619
00:23:20,610 --> 00:23:23,076
♪ I’m really hungry mom ♪
620
00:23:25,643 --> 00:23:29,143
♪ That’s what these
tears are about ♪
621
00:23:31,043 --> 00:23:34,576
♪ You know what
that means ♪
622
00:23:34,610 --> 00:23:38,977
♪ I’m begging
you please ♪
623
00:23:41,209 --> 00:23:44,443
♪ Put your titty
in my mouth ♪
624
00:23:44,476 --> 00:23:45,676
[laughs]
625
00:23:45,710 --> 00:23:48,843
♪ Put your titty in my mouth ♪
626
00:23:48,877 --> 00:23:52,410
♪ Whip that big
old titty out ♪
627
00:23:52,443 --> 00:23:56,309
♪ And shove it in
my little mouth ♪
628
00:23:59,309 --> 00:24:02,410
♪ And since you
took so long bitch ♪
629
00:24:02,443 --> 00:24:05,543
♪ I’m gonna chew
up your nips ♪
630
00:24:07,676 --> 00:24:09,143
[laughs]
631
00:24:11,710 --> 00:24:14,610
Oh.
632
00:24:14,643 --> 00:24:16,510
[Mae] What is he doing
with his mouth, Trevor?
633
00:24:16,543 --> 00:24:18,843
Trying not to laugh.
634
00:24:18,877 --> 00:24:21,910
[Jay] He’s dying,
he really likes to laugh.
635
00:24:21,943 --> 00:24:23,610
I’m just going
to do one quick thing.
636
00:24:23,643 --> 00:24:25,443
This is actually
a request from Jay.
637
00:24:25,476 --> 00:24:26,510
[laughs]
638
00:24:26,543 --> 00:24:27,510
[Jay]
Oh, here we fucking go again.
639
00:24:27,543 --> 00:24:29,243
[Jon] When I was walking
in this morning,
640
00:24:29,276 --> 00:24:32,777
I was carrying my guitar
case and, uh, he was like
641
00:24:32,810 --> 00:24:34,010
"Oh, you gonna
play some songs?"
642
00:24:34,043 --> 00:24:36,476
I was like, "I dunno maybe."
643
00:24:36,510 --> 00:24:39,043
And uh, he was like, "Yeah.
I write songs all the time."
644
00:24:39,076 --> 00:24:41,710
I was like, "Dude,
I’ll play one of your songs,"
645
00:24:41,743 --> 00:24:45,643
One of your songs,
Jay Baruchel’s songs.
646
00:24:45,676 --> 00:24:48,176
Oh my God.
647
00:24:48,209 --> 00:24:52,376
I seem to be the sort of,
um, fulcrum of Jon Lajoie's,
648
00:24:52,410 --> 00:24:53,977
uh, um, creative plan.
649
00:24:54,010 --> 00:24:56,209
I was equal parts
annoyed and flattered.
650
00:24:56,243 --> 00:24:58,877
[laughs]
651
00:24:58,910 --> 00:25:04,043
So, Jay Baruchel, the host
of this show’s song still...
652
00:25:05,443 --> 00:25:06,777
Oh God.
653
00:25:06,810 --> 00:25:11,343
♪ I don’t care ♪
654
00:25:11,376 --> 00:25:13,676
♪ What anybody thinks ♪
655
00:25:17,910 --> 00:25:22,176
♪ I don’t care
if they don’t ♪
656
00:25:22,209 --> 00:25:24,643
♪ Don’t understand ♪
657
00:25:30,276 --> 00:25:34,843
♪ I still think R. Kelly
is the man ♪
658
00:25:34,877 --> 00:25:37,943
[laughs]
659
00:25:37,977 --> 00:25:40,243
♪ I, Jay Baruchel ♪
660
00:25:40,276 --> 00:25:45,243
♪ Still think
R. Kelly is the man ♪
661
00:25:46,777 --> 00:25:47,476
Woo!
662
00:25:47,510 --> 00:25:48,476
- Alright!
- Yeah!
663
00:25:48,510 --> 00:25:49,676
Pretty good man.
A little short but...
664
00:25:49,710 --> 00:25:50,943
Jay Baruchel!
665
00:25:50,977 --> 00:25:53,109
[laughs]
666
00:25:53,143 --> 00:25:54,543
That’s nice.
667
00:25:54,576 --> 00:25:56,143
It could use a bridge but
otherwise it’s really good.
668
00:25:56,176 --> 00:25:57,376
Yeah.
669
00:25:57,410 --> 00:25:59,343
Whatever happened to
that R. Kelly guy anyway?
670
00:25:59,376 --> 00:26:01,276
You guys all know him, huh?
671
00:26:01,309 --> 00:26:03,777
Tom, I’ve seen you hanging
out with hip hop stars.
672
00:26:03,810 --> 00:26:06,610
You’re a Juno
nominated rapper.
673
00:26:06,643 --> 00:26:07,943
I was nominated
for a Juno.
674
00:26:07,977 --> 00:26:08,943
You were.
675
00:26:08,977 --> 00:26:11,143
Yeah... I lost.
676
00:26:11,176 --> 00:26:12,343
[phone rings]
677
00:26:12,376 --> 00:26:13,676
Yeah, you lost.
That’s why I say nominated.
678
00:26:16,643 --> 00:26:17,610
Hello?
679
00:26:17,643 --> 00:26:19,109
Hi, Trevor,
can you tell Jon Lajoie
680
00:26:19,143 --> 00:26:20,743
to go fuck himself please?
681
00:26:20,777 --> 00:26:22,076
Yeah, yeah.
682
00:26:22,109 --> 00:26:24,109
See ya later. Bye.
683
00:26:24,143 --> 00:26:27,410
That’s somebody telling us
to stop talking about R. Kelly.
684
00:26:27,443 --> 00:26:28,743
Yeah.
685
00:26:28,777 --> 00:26:31,176
Or talk more about
Tom’s Juno nomination.
686
00:26:31,209 --> 00:26:34,576
Oh!
687
00:26:34,610 --> 00:26:36,010
That’s a smile.
That’s a full smile.
688
00:26:36,043 --> 00:26:37,443
[alarm rings]
689
00:26:37,476 --> 00:26:39,743
Uh oh!
Uh oh! Uh oh!
690
00:26:39,777 --> 00:26:41,443
Damn.
691
00:26:44,777 --> 00:26:46,543
This is gonna hurt me
more than it hurts him.
692
00:26:54,043 --> 00:26:56,643
I don’t know.
I don’t know.
693
00:26:56,676 --> 00:26:59,810
I don’t think
I moved at all.
694
00:26:59,843 --> 00:27:01,543
Um...
695
00:27:01,576 --> 00:27:02,710
So scared.
696
00:27:02,743 --> 00:27:03,843
Yeah.
697
00:27:03,877 --> 00:27:05,143
Let’s take a look
at the TV guys.
698
00:27:07,209 --> 00:27:10,810
You’re a Juno nominated rapper.
699
00:27:10,843 --> 00:27:12,109
I lost.
700
00:27:12,143 --> 00:27:12,777
Yeah, you lost.
701
00:27:12,810 --> 00:27:14,410
[phone rings]
702
00:27:14,443 --> 00:27:15,443
Hello?
703
00:27:15,476 --> 00:27:16,610
That’s somebody
telling us to stop
704
00:27:16,643 --> 00:27:19,043
talking about R. Kelly.
705
00:27:19,076 --> 00:27:21,010
Yeah.
706
00:27:21,043 --> 00:27:23,676
[laughs]
707
00:27:23,710 --> 00:27:25,510
- Oh no!
- You’re free!
708
00:27:25,543 --> 00:27:28,243
- Oh my god!
- You’re free. Dave.
709
00:27:28,276 --> 00:27:30,143
Ladies and gentleman,
another one bites the dust.
710
00:27:30,176 --> 00:27:33,877
Aww. Oh, fuck y’all.
Fuck y’all.
711
00:27:33,910 --> 00:27:36,109
I thought I might
have seen a smirk there.
712
00:27:36,143 --> 00:27:39,510
It was nice knowing that
I actually made Dave laugh.
713
00:27:39,543 --> 00:27:42,109
I mean, a certain amount
of guilt, but then also
714
00:27:42,143 --> 00:27:43,910
a certain amount
of pride as well.
715
00:27:43,943 --> 00:27:46,109
[K. Trevor laughs]
716
00:27:48,276 --> 00:27:49,610
See ya.
717
00:27:49,643 --> 00:27:52,777
[band plays]
718
00:27:52,810 --> 00:27:54,109
I’ll try to hold up
the old guy end.
719
00:27:54,143 --> 00:27:56,176
Ohh.
720
00:27:56,209 --> 00:27:57,810
- So let’s unpack this.
- Alright.
721
00:27:57,843 --> 00:27:58,576
What are you,
what are you thinking?
722
00:27:58,610 --> 00:28:00,176
What are, impressions?
723
00:28:00,209 --> 00:28:02,943
Well I just, I always
find R. Kelly funny.
724
00:28:02,977 --> 00:28:04,309
[laughs]
725
00:28:04,343 --> 00:28:05,943
- Dave!
- Dave!
726
00:28:05,977 --> 00:28:07,076
Was that a smile?
727
00:28:07,109 --> 00:28:08,443
Having gone through it,
728
00:28:08,476 --> 00:28:12,410
{\an8}it is a strangely
exhausting experience.
729
00:28:12,443 --> 00:28:16,176
I had a wonderful time
having a terrible time.
730
00:28:18,076 --> 00:28:21,376
[Jay] Tom gives Mr. Dave Foley
the red card treatment.
731
00:28:21,410 --> 00:28:23,710
Adding another victim
to his hit list.
732
00:28:23,743 --> 00:28:25,810
Who will be next to enter
Tom’s cross hairs?
733
00:28:25,843 --> 00:28:27,476
Stay tuned for
more carnage.
734
00:28:29,309 --> 00:28:31,376
[horn sounds]
Aw shit.
735
00:28:31,410 --> 00:28:33,209
- [Tom] Here we go.
- [Jon] Shit.
736
00:28:33,243 --> 00:28:34,510
[doorbell rings]
737
00:28:39,209 --> 00:28:41,543
- What is this?
- What’s that?
738
00:28:45,877 --> 00:28:47,543
- Whoa!
- What?
739
00:28:47,576 --> 00:28:49,176
Hi, Daddy.
740
00:28:49,209 --> 00:28:50,476
{\an8}He’s gonna hurt himself!
741
00:28:50,510 --> 00:28:52,410
{\an8}- They’re not laughing?
- We’re not supposed to.
742
00:28:52,443 --> 00:28:53,543
{\an8}I’m gonna have no fun.
743
00:28:53,576 --> 00:28:55,143
{\an8}’Cause that’s the
kinda guy I am.
744
00:28:55,176 --> 00:28:56,209
{\an8}How’s your vision?
745
00:28:56,243 --> 00:28:57,176
{\an8}You think that’s
weird, you should
746
00:28:57,209 --> 00:28:58,376
{\an8}see where his
balls are.
747
00:28:58,410 --> 00:29:01,610
{\an8}Don’t you dare
with your cheese sandwich!
748
00:29:01,643 --> 00:29:03,443
{\an8}[Jon] How do you
not laugh at that?
749
00:29:03,476 --> 00:29:04,843
{\an8}Are you not alive?
750
00:29:04,877 --> 00:29:06,176
{\an8}Whoa!
751
00:29:06,209 --> 00:29:08,410
{\an8}- [Paul] I have the pizzas.
- Oh boy.
752
00:29:08,443 --> 00:29:10,910
{\an8}Is it possible that we’re
just all losing our minds?
753
00:29:10,943 --> 00:29:11,810
{\an8}Uh-oh.
754
00:29:11,843 --> 00:29:12,977
{\an8}[Debra laughs]
755
00:29:13,010 --> 00:29:15,143
{\an8}Uh! My penis has
never been so hard.
756
00:29:15,176 --> 00:29:16,476
{\an8}Uh, cheque please!
757
00:29:17,877 --> 00:29:19,877
♪