1 00:00:12,492 --> 00:00:17,882 [music playing] 2 00:00:17,986 --> 00:00:20,594 What would you do if you found the person 3 00:00:20,698 --> 00:00:22,784 you married loved someone else? 4 00:00:22,889 --> 00:00:24,698 I hope it's not the same as this guy. 5 00:00:24,802 --> 00:00:28,243 Thomas said, if I can't have her, 6 00:00:28,348 --> 00:00:32,799 no one will, and he killed her. 7 00:00:32,903 --> 00:00:36,798 No one can have Lisa now because Thomas pulled that trigger. 8 00:00:36,902 --> 00:00:39,963 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: A proud serving US Navy man is 9 00:00:40,067 --> 00:00:42,675 forced to face a violent truth. 10 00:00:42,779 --> 00:00:44,830 His father has killed his mother. 11 00:00:44,935 --> 00:00:47,925 He is now part of the collateral damage. 12 00:00:48,030 --> 00:00:49,594 Dad did what he did. 13 00:00:49,699 --> 00:00:50,811 Mom did what she did. 14 00:00:50,916 --> 00:00:54,358 They both did bad things. 15 00:00:54,462 --> 00:00:58,044 But I can't really say I love one more than the other, 16 00:00:58,148 --> 00:00:59,747 even after everything happened. 17 00:00:59,851 --> 00:01:01,695 You just can't take sides. 18 00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:05,623 Half of women murdered are killed by their partners. 19 00:01:05,728 --> 00:01:07,885 This is "Meet Mary Murder." 20 00:01:07,989 --> 00:01:12,231 [theme music] 21 00:01:26,175 --> 00:01:29,825 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: A cute street in Shelton, Connecticut. 22 00:01:29,930 --> 00:01:35,563 In a picture book house, mom dad and four kids. 23 00:01:35,668 --> 00:01:37,337 Pretty dreamy, right? 24 00:01:37,441 --> 00:01:38,867 Wrong. 25 00:01:38,971 --> 00:01:42,101 CAROLYN CANVILLE: One of them hears the dog scratching 26 00:01:42,206 --> 00:01:45,751 at his mom's bedroom door. 27 00:01:45,855 --> 00:01:48,047 BRIAN HARRIS: Scratch, scratch, scratch. 28 00:01:48,152 --> 00:01:50,655 Someone wants to find out what's going on. 29 00:01:50,759 --> 00:01:53,053 So when he walks down the hall to the master 30 00:01:53,157 --> 00:01:55,871 bedroom and he opens the door-- 31 00:01:55,975 --> 00:02:01,782 'Cause why does their dog want inside so badly. 32 00:02:01,886 --> 00:02:03,556 CAROLYN CANVILLE: And what he sees 33 00:02:03,659 --> 00:02:07,520 is his mom lying on the bed, face down, 34 00:02:07,624 --> 00:02:09,466 blood coming out of the back of her head. 35 00:02:09,570 --> 00:02:14,440 She's been shot once in the head, and she's dead. 36 00:02:14,544 --> 00:02:18,021 BRIAN HARRIS: A frantic 911 call was made. 37 00:02:18,126 --> 00:02:22,332 It's that of a teenager reporting 38 00:02:22,436 --> 00:02:24,245 that he went into his mom's bedroom 39 00:02:24,350 --> 00:02:26,401 and he found his mom dead. 40 00:02:26,505 --> 00:02:29,773 Panicked, and so the police respond. 41 00:02:29,878 --> 00:02:31,965 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Next to get a call 42 00:02:32,069 --> 00:02:33,320 is big brother, Vinnie. 43 00:02:33,425 --> 00:02:35,614 VINNIE INFANTE: I couldn't find my keys, 44 00:02:35,719 --> 00:02:39,614 jumped in my fiance's car. 45 00:02:39,718 --> 00:02:44,030 I think I had shoes on but rushed over to my house. 46 00:02:44,135 --> 00:02:48,064 And the whole street was lined with neighbors and police 47 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:51,471 and friends of the family. 48 00:02:51,576 --> 00:02:53,489 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Imagine this. 49 00:02:53,592 --> 00:02:57,070 The family dog going crazy from the smell of blood. 50 00:02:57,174 --> 00:02:58,982 So what is happening here? 51 00:02:59,087 --> 00:03:02,668 Why is Lisa Infante lying dead on her bed? 52 00:03:02,772 --> 00:03:05,903 What's the story of Lisa and Tom Infante? 53 00:03:11,187 --> 00:03:14,248 Lisa Anne Swanson and Thomas J Infante Jr. 54 00:03:14,353 --> 00:03:17,411 got married on June 25, 1988. 55 00:03:17,516 --> 00:03:21,237 It was in Monroe, Connecticut, a nice neighborhood. 56 00:03:21,341 --> 00:03:22,801 They were 25. 57 00:03:22,906 --> 00:03:25,028 The guests walking into church that day 58 00:03:25,132 --> 00:03:28,261 didn't have to worry about which side of the aisle to sit on. 59 00:03:28,364 --> 00:03:32,642 Everybody at the wedding knew pretty much everyone else. 60 00:03:32,746 --> 00:03:34,624 VINNIE INFANTE: They met when they were kids. 61 00:03:34,728 --> 00:03:35,946 They grew up together. 62 00:03:36,050 --> 00:03:39,840 They were almost like super close friends. 63 00:03:39,944 --> 00:03:42,657 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: As teenagers, Tom and Lisa 64 00:03:42,761 --> 00:03:45,229 lived just four houses away from each other 65 00:03:45,334 --> 00:03:47,282 on the Monroe Turnpike. 66 00:03:47,386 --> 00:03:49,021 They went to high school together, 67 00:03:49,125 --> 00:03:52,149 again, in the same neighborhood where they live. 68 00:03:52,253 --> 00:03:57,053 And they both graduated in the class of 1980. 69 00:03:57,157 --> 00:04:01,017 Wow, talk about your textbook high school sweethearts. 70 00:04:01,122 --> 00:04:02,269 I like these guys. 71 00:04:06,372 --> 00:04:08,980 VINNIE INFANTE: I know my uncle Rich 72 00:04:09,084 --> 00:04:12,597 and my dad were really close. 73 00:04:12,701 --> 00:04:15,169 And same with my aunt and my dad. 74 00:04:15,274 --> 00:04:16,351 Everyone is just like-- 75 00:04:16,455 --> 00:04:19,098 We were all a pretty close family. 76 00:04:19,203 --> 00:04:22,645 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Three years into their marriage baby 77 00:04:22,749 --> 00:04:24,245 Vincent comes along. 78 00:04:24,350 --> 00:04:28,208 Then Harrison, Matt, and Kayla. 79 00:04:28,312 --> 00:04:30,469 A big family, right? 80 00:04:30,574 --> 00:04:35,163 Everyone can see that Tom and Lisa really loved their kids. 81 00:04:35,267 --> 00:04:37,423 They were animal lovers, too. 82 00:04:37,529 --> 00:04:40,970 There were always cats and dogs in the house. 83 00:04:41,074 --> 00:04:45,317 It's a happy busy family home. 84 00:04:45,421 --> 00:04:48,377 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Lisa and Thomas had four kids. 85 00:04:48,482 --> 00:04:51,368 They had one daughter and three sons. 86 00:04:51,472 --> 00:04:54,046 The daughter was especially close to the father. 87 00:04:54,150 --> 00:04:57,487 VINNIE INFANTE: He was just a typical dad, 88 00:04:57,591 --> 00:05:00,060 emotional at times. 89 00:05:00,164 --> 00:05:02,355 He acted pretty emotional. 90 00:05:02,461 --> 00:05:03,746 He would cry over songs. 91 00:05:03,851 --> 00:05:05,833 And we had these little chihuahuas. 92 00:05:05,937 --> 00:05:09,970 He would love them, loved to hold them. 93 00:05:10,075 --> 00:05:14,700 He was very just an emotional guy, sensitive. 94 00:05:14,804 --> 00:05:17,377 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: A softy with the dogs maybe, 95 00:05:17,481 --> 00:05:21,306 but not when it comes to raising his kids. 96 00:05:21,410 --> 00:05:23,915 Tom and Lisa were very different. 97 00:05:24,019 --> 00:05:26,592 VINNIE INFANTE: My mom was usually pretty laid back. 98 00:05:26,696 --> 00:05:31,981 She was into yoga and never really hard going. 99 00:05:32,086 --> 00:05:37,544 Dad was kind of more strict about things. 100 00:05:37,650 --> 00:05:39,144 Like no you can't do that. 101 00:05:39,248 --> 00:05:41,092 No, you can't do that kind of thing. 102 00:05:41,196 --> 00:05:43,561 CAROLYN CANVILLE: She was loving and giving 103 00:05:43,665 --> 00:05:45,369 and you could kind of tell that in her profession. 104 00:05:45,473 --> 00:05:48,672 She was a nutritionist also a yoga instructor. 105 00:05:48,777 --> 00:05:53,401 But she also volunteered her time as an EMS technician, 106 00:05:53,506 --> 00:05:54,828 emergency medical services. 107 00:05:54,932 --> 00:05:56,844 So you could see the kind of personality she was 108 00:05:56,949 --> 00:05:59,974 and what she chose to do with her life. 109 00:06:00,078 --> 00:06:03,416 VINNIE INFANTE: She was an EMT, so she 110 00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:06,372 really cared about people, cared about their well-being. 111 00:06:06,477 --> 00:06:09,536 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: In 2010, Lisa gets into yoga 112 00:06:09,640 --> 00:06:11,866 and qualifies as an instructor. 113 00:06:11,970 --> 00:06:15,691 She quits her job and starts teaching full time. 114 00:06:15,795 --> 00:06:18,334 She's into something called Holy Fit, 115 00:06:18,438 --> 00:06:23,167 which combines Christian devotion with exercise. 116 00:06:23,271 --> 00:06:28,487 And I have to say, it suits her personality to a T. 117 00:06:28,591 --> 00:06:31,165 VINNIE INFANTE: She helped out the community, 118 00:06:31,269 --> 00:06:33,633 helped out people. 119 00:06:33,737 --> 00:06:35,128 She was awesome. 120 00:06:35,233 --> 00:06:37,354 Me and her got along really well. 121 00:06:37,458 --> 00:06:38,919 We would do yoga together. 122 00:06:39,023 --> 00:06:44,031 She's a very caring, very compassionate, 123 00:06:44,135 --> 00:06:50,150 really loved us kids, great cook. 124 00:06:50,254 --> 00:06:53,384 We'd always come home and she'd have something waiting for us, 125 00:06:53,488 --> 00:06:56,931 like brownies or cookies or something. 126 00:06:57,035 --> 00:06:59,572 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Thomas, he becomes an equipment 127 00:06:59,677 --> 00:07:01,834 operator for the public works department 128 00:07:01,938 --> 00:07:05,903 one town over in Trumbull, not sexy but study. 129 00:07:06,007 --> 00:07:08,789 VINNIE INFANTE: He kept doing what he liked. 130 00:07:08,893 --> 00:07:11,257 He was a great guy to be around. 131 00:07:11,361 --> 00:07:12,822 Funny. 132 00:07:12,926 --> 00:07:14,803 Like tell jokes. 133 00:07:14,908 --> 00:07:16,159 Good sense of humor. 134 00:07:16,263 --> 00:07:17,584 And then we would always hang out with dad, 135 00:07:17,690 --> 00:07:22,106 like go out on car trips, go pick 136 00:07:22,210 --> 00:07:23,810 up a new tractor or something. 137 00:07:23,915 --> 00:07:27,634 So dad would always bring home stuff for me 138 00:07:27,738 --> 00:07:30,208 and my brother to work on and play with, 139 00:07:30,313 --> 00:07:32,399 like big toys kind of thing. 140 00:07:32,504 --> 00:07:34,624 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: And he and his brothers and sisters 141 00:07:34,728 --> 00:07:35,980 have a happy childhood. 142 00:07:36,085 --> 00:07:37,615 But they could hardly miss the fact 143 00:07:37,720 --> 00:07:41,683 that their mom and dad don't see eye to eye a lot of the time. 144 00:07:41,788 --> 00:07:44,361 CAROLYN CANVILLE: All four of the kids, it's clear, 145 00:07:44,465 --> 00:07:47,594 had witnessed a lot of angst in this marriage. 146 00:07:47,700 --> 00:07:49,715 There was a lot of fighting going on from the time they 147 00:07:49,819 --> 00:07:51,732 were little because it pretty much 148 00:07:51,837 --> 00:07:53,436 spanned their whole lifetime. 149 00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:58,096 VINNIE INFANTE: I mean, their personalities grew apart. 150 00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:00,426 I think they kind of settled for each other 151 00:08:00,530 --> 00:08:02,442 because they were friends, they were neighbors. 152 00:08:02,546 --> 00:08:05,258 But that never gave them the opportunity 153 00:08:05,362 --> 00:08:09,814 to grow as a person, individually, and experience 154 00:08:09,918 --> 00:08:13,917 those breakups and other people, which 155 00:08:14,021 --> 00:08:17,082 every healthy relationship and person kind of needs 156 00:08:17,186 --> 00:08:19,203 to go through, I think. 157 00:08:19,307 --> 00:08:20,768 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: So things are often 158 00:08:20,872 --> 00:08:23,758 difficult in that big Connecticut house. 159 00:08:23,863 --> 00:08:25,323 I'm sensing tension. 160 00:08:25,428 --> 00:08:29,321 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Thomas was a dark, angry. 161 00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:32,347 He had a quick temper, and he was 162 00:08:32,452 --> 00:08:36,798 known to sometimes get violent when he had his outbursts. 163 00:08:36,902 --> 00:08:39,579 VINNIE INFANTE: It was like bickering, 164 00:08:39,683 --> 00:08:41,387 just like little stuff. 165 00:08:41,491 --> 00:08:43,266 Like I felt it was just stupid stuff 166 00:08:43,370 --> 00:08:44,691 they would always fight about. 167 00:08:44,795 --> 00:08:47,542 But I guess that all build up, build up, build up, 168 00:08:47,647 --> 00:08:48,934 and just turned into something big. 169 00:08:49,038 --> 00:08:50,950 CAROLYN CANVILLE: You know, they don't 170 00:08:51,054 --> 00:08:52,896 talk about physical abuse. 171 00:08:53,001 --> 00:08:54,184 They don't talk about beatings. 172 00:08:54,289 --> 00:08:55,992 They talk about hurting each other. 173 00:08:56,097 --> 00:08:59,190 My parents always were fighting. 174 00:08:59,295 --> 00:09:01,486 They were always abusing each other. 175 00:09:01,591 --> 00:09:03,816 They there was a lot of pain on both sides 176 00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:07,605 is what the daughter said later in court. 177 00:09:07,711 --> 00:09:08,962 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: I want to know 178 00:09:09,066 --> 00:09:10,909 if there is any red flags here. 179 00:09:11,013 --> 00:09:14,665 Karen Jarmoc from the Coalition Against Domestic Violence 180 00:09:14,769 --> 00:09:16,960 knows this stuff, and she doesn't 181 00:09:17,063 --> 00:09:18,489 like what she's hearing. 182 00:09:18,594 --> 00:09:22,557 KAREN JARMOC: It's the threats, the harassment, 183 00:09:22,661 --> 00:09:24,819 isolating someone from their family, 184 00:09:24,923 --> 00:09:28,642 friends, coworkers, using coercion 185 00:09:28,747 --> 00:09:34,102 and control to try to really take control over your partner. 186 00:09:34,206 --> 00:09:37,232 So many people think domestic violence 187 00:09:37,337 --> 00:09:42,240 and they think of a black eye or a broken limb. 188 00:09:42,344 --> 00:09:45,438 And it can be that, but, generally, 189 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:48,325 it's just much more subliminal. 190 00:09:48,429 --> 00:09:53,054 BRIAN HARRIS: She had posted on her own social media 191 00:09:53,157 --> 00:09:59,974 about how abusive, mentally, her husband could be. 192 00:10:00,078 --> 00:10:02,963 KAREN JARMOC: It's that very under the surface 193 00:10:03,067 --> 00:10:05,607 stuff that may or may not have been occurring 194 00:10:05,711 --> 00:10:09,327 in this relationship around the subliminal power 195 00:10:09,431 --> 00:10:12,734 and control the person's trying to have over the other. 196 00:10:12,839 --> 00:10:15,135 And when they start to lose that it can 197 00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:18,994 become very, very dangerous. 198 00:10:19,098 --> 00:10:20,524 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Lisa and Thomas 199 00:10:20,629 --> 00:10:22,819 have been married for 27 years. 200 00:10:22,923 --> 00:10:24,488 You think, wow, they've weathered a lot. 201 00:10:24,592 --> 00:10:27,096 But this was not a good marriage and apparently 202 00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:28,556 not from the get go. 203 00:10:28,660 --> 00:10:32,381 It was filled with, you know, fighting and abuse, 204 00:10:32,486 --> 00:10:35,267 verbal, perhaps physical. 205 00:10:35,371 --> 00:10:37,529 Everybody said that this from the very start 206 00:10:37,632 --> 00:10:40,831 had its problems, but they stuck together. 207 00:10:40,935 --> 00:10:42,953 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: I've heard this story before. 208 00:10:43,057 --> 00:10:46,777 Lisa and Thomas Infante try to make it work for years, being 209 00:10:46,881 --> 00:10:48,447 the best parents they can be. 210 00:10:48,551 --> 00:10:51,332 Staying together for the kids because they 211 00:10:51,437 --> 00:10:53,175 have so much history together. 212 00:10:53,279 --> 00:10:56,722 And then that doesn't seem so important. 213 00:10:56,826 --> 00:10:59,295 BRIAN HARRIS: She decided it was over. 214 00:10:59,399 --> 00:11:01,729 She was going to take charge of her life. 215 00:11:01,834 --> 00:11:03,954 CAROLYN CANVILLE: She was ready to move on. 216 00:11:04,058 --> 00:11:06,529 BRIAN HARRIS: It's the most dangerous time 217 00:11:06,633 --> 00:11:09,310 for any female when they've finally 218 00:11:09,414 --> 00:11:11,430 made the decision to leave. 219 00:11:11,535 --> 00:11:16,750 [music playing] 220 00:11:33,198 --> 00:11:34,588 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Tom and Lisa 221 00:11:34,692 --> 00:11:37,580 stick it out for 27 years of marriage, 222 00:11:37,684 --> 00:11:39,701 raising four great kids. 223 00:11:39,805 --> 00:11:45,681 Admirable, but in 2015, tensions are out in the open. 224 00:11:45,785 --> 00:11:47,664 VINNIE INFANTE: I know they were seeing 225 00:11:47,768 --> 00:11:52,810 a couples therapist, which I don't think helped at all. 226 00:11:52,914 --> 00:11:55,905 I think it made things worse, honestly. 227 00:11:56,009 --> 00:11:59,591 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Lisa's sister, Lynn Everlilthe, 228 00:11:59,695 --> 00:12:02,720 was never a big fan of Thomas Infante. 229 00:12:02,824 --> 00:12:05,954 She really didn't want them to get married to begin with. 230 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:07,241 She said, their marriage had been 231 00:12:07,345 --> 00:12:09,952 strained right from the get go. 232 00:12:10,057 --> 00:12:11,971 She said, those children had been raised 233 00:12:12,074 --> 00:12:13,847 in a really toxic environment. 234 00:12:13,951 --> 00:12:17,881 And she says that he was just a miserable person to be around. 235 00:12:17,986 --> 00:12:20,350 He was never pleasant to be around. 236 00:12:20,454 --> 00:12:24,592 VINNIE INFANTE: I think mom was more of a gradual change. 237 00:12:24,697 --> 00:12:30,087 You can kind of see her veering away throughout the years. 238 00:12:30,191 --> 00:12:34,363 Dad always tried to do the best he could. 239 00:12:34,467 --> 00:12:39,891 But, I mean, their personalities grew apart. 240 00:12:39,996 --> 00:12:41,422 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Life is beating 241 00:12:41,526 --> 00:12:43,091 Lisa and Tom up in other ways. 242 00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:47,194 In the last two years, Tom's dad had died. 243 00:12:47,298 --> 00:12:51,192 Then both of Lisa's parents had passed to. 244 00:12:51,297 --> 00:12:53,940 Then this bombshell from Lisa. 245 00:12:54,044 --> 00:12:57,556 She told her husband that she had met someone. 246 00:12:57,661 --> 00:12:59,817 She told her that she wanted a divorce. 247 00:12:59,921 --> 00:13:03,885 And according to her, she told her friends, 248 00:13:03,989 --> 00:13:08,336 apparently, that she had already hired a divorce attorney. 249 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:10,943 And she was ready, and she was starting to make plans. 250 00:13:11,048 --> 00:13:12,753 VINNIE INFANTE: But at a certain point, 251 00:13:12,857 --> 00:13:15,986 he just was like mom's cheating on me. 252 00:13:16,090 --> 00:13:20,854 And it kind of threw me back because they've been, 253 00:13:20,958 --> 00:13:26,697 my parents, together for the whole 20 years of my life. 254 00:13:26,801 --> 00:13:29,721 And she was over hanging out with this guy making dinner 255 00:13:29,826 --> 00:13:34,275 for his kids, and it was just-- 256 00:13:34,380 --> 00:13:37,405 I'm like just why would you do that, mom? 257 00:13:37,511 --> 00:13:38,901 You got a great family. 258 00:13:39,005 --> 00:13:41,265 You have a great house. 259 00:13:41,370 --> 00:13:43,144 I mean, I guess she wasn't happy. 260 00:13:43,248 --> 00:13:45,022 She went up to me when she was talking about it. 261 00:13:45,125 --> 00:13:46,724 She was like don't want me to be happy? 262 00:13:46,829 --> 00:13:48,325 And that kind of threw me for a loop 263 00:13:48,429 --> 00:13:49,750 because I didn't know how to answer that question. 264 00:13:49,855 --> 00:13:51,906 I'm like of course I want you to be happy, mom. 265 00:13:54,653 --> 00:13:56,496 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Lisa makes up her mind. 266 00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:58,965 She's doing this, but Tom just isn't 267 00:13:59,068 --> 00:14:02,825 coming to terms with the fact that his marriage is over. 268 00:14:02,929 --> 00:14:04,355 VINNIE INFANTE: I was pretty close to him. 269 00:14:04,459 --> 00:14:06,754 So I got to see the good, bad, and ugly. 270 00:14:06,858 --> 00:14:10,682 So I know when I was down in Florida with the Navy 271 00:14:10,786 --> 00:14:13,952 he would call me up and he would just be 272 00:14:14,056 --> 00:14:15,829 crying his eyes out about mom. 273 00:14:15,933 --> 00:14:18,195 And no kid wants to hear their dad cry. 274 00:14:20,976 --> 00:14:24,384 You could just see dad deteriorating. 275 00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:25,913 He was just depressed. 276 00:14:26,018 --> 00:14:31,408 He would just call me upset in weird times of the night. 277 00:14:31,512 --> 00:14:35,406 And then once I got home from the Navy 278 00:14:35,511 --> 00:14:37,737 after a long nine months of being away, 279 00:14:37,841 --> 00:14:39,544 you'd think you want to hang out with your kid. 280 00:14:39,648 --> 00:14:41,038 He didn't even want to do that. 281 00:14:41,144 --> 00:14:43,473 I tried to get him up, try to bring him 282 00:14:43,577 --> 00:14:45,490 to county fairs or something. 283 00:14:45,594 --> 00:14:47,508 And he just would not get out of bed. 284 00:14:47,612 --> 00:14:49,246 He was like a blob. 285 00:14:49,350 --> 00:14:52,445 And I thought it was just going to be the sissy 286 00:14:52,549 --> 00:14:53,871 about the whole thing. 287 00:14:53,975 --> 00:14:57,521 And I really did not know what was going through his head. 288 00:14:57,625 --> 00:15:00,617 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Thomas, he still loved his wife. 289 00:15:00,721 --> 00:15:03,920 He may have been a mean and angry guy. 290 00:15:04,024 --> 00:15:05,521 He may have abused her. 291 00:15:05,625 --> 00:15:07,815 But he still considered this is my wife. 292 00:15:07,919 --> 00:15:11,813 She belongs to me, and no one else should have her. 293 00:15:11,918 --> 00:15:14,038 He didn't necessarily voice that to her. 294 00:15:14,143 --> 00:15:17,063 He would talk to her about let's not get divorced. 295 00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:18,176 He would kind of plead with her. 296 00:15:18,281 --> 00:15:19,846 But she had made up her mind. 297 00:15:19,950 --> 00:15:22,418 VINNIE INFANTE: Dad didn't really have that personality 298 00:15:22,522 --> 00:15:24,019 where he would actually go out and talk 299 00:15:24,123 --> 00:15:25,513 to a therapist or something. 300 00:15:25,618 --> 00:15:27,321 I think he went to a doctor and they 301 00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:28,886 gave him some antidepressants. 302 00:15:28,990 --> 00:15:31,494 Who knows if those are good for him. 303 00:15:31,599 --> 00:15:33,094 Probably not. 304 00:15:33,198 --> 00:15:35,006 He was never the kind of guy who would actually take pills. 305 00:15:35,110 --> 00:15:37,094 He wouldn't even take aspirin for a headache. 306 00:15:37,198 --> 00:15:39,700 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Karen Jarmoc, the campaigner 307 00:15:39,805 --> 00:15:41,509 against domestic violence, is worried 308 00:15:41,614 --> 00:15:44,951 about what she's hearing, telling Tom he is history. 309 00:15:45,055 --> 00:15:48,012 That's bad territory Lisa is entering. 310 00:15:48,116 --> 00:15:50,863 KAREN JARMOC: That's a really, really critical dangerous time 311 00:15:50,967 --> 00:15:54,409 because then they start losing their control 312 00:15:54,513 --> 00:15:55,939 and things begin to unravel. 313 00:15:56,043 --> 00:15:59,172 So we always know, and that's, I think, 314 00:15:59,278 --> 00:16:03,381 what's so tragic and sad, when a domestic violence homicide 315 00:16:03,485 --> 00:16:07,937 occurs because there are always these red flags that aren't 316 00:16:08,041 --> 00:16:12,491 always as noticeable to the victim 317 00:16:12,596 --> 00:16:15,551 and/or to those individuals around them. 318 00:16:15,655 --> 00:16:19,098 But when we look back we see them there. 319 00:16:19,203 --> 00:16:22,887 BRIAN HARRIS: 38% of the time when women are murdered, 320 00:16:22,993 --> 00:16:26,609 they're murdered by their spouse or loved one, 321 00:16:26,713 --> 00:16:29,391 compared to only 6% of men. 322 00:16:29,495 --> 00:16:31,721 Oftentimes as police officers, we 323 00:16:31,825 --> 00:16:33,945 say why don't they just leave. 324 00:16:34,050 --> 00:16:39,405 Well, out of those 38% of women who get murdered, nearly 68% 325 00:16:39,510 --> 00:16:43,126 of those women are murdered when they finally 326 00:16:43,230 --> 00:16:47,124 made the decision to leave. 327 00:16:47,229 --> 00:16:50,741 And this was the same case in Shelton, Connecticut. 328 00:16:50,845 --> 00:16:52,861 She decided it was over. 329 00:16:52,966 --> 00:16:55,400 She was going to take charge of her life. 330 00:16:55,504 --> 00:17:01,729 It's the most dangerous time for any female or any relationship. 331 00:17:01,833 --> 00:17:05,415 CAROLYN CANVILLE: So she's moving on, he's not. 332 00:17:05,519 --> 00:17:08,232 So you can see that in his mind he's thinking, 333 00:17:08,336 --> 00:17:11,151 I'm not ready for her to move on, she's ready for her 334 00:17:11,257 --> 00:17:12,023 to move on. 335 00:17:12,126 --> 00:17:13,726 I don't want anyone to have her. 336 00:17:13,830 --> 00:17:15,290 So what is he going to do? 337 00:17:15,394 --> 00:17:17,308 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Does Lisa Infante have 338 00:17:17,412 --> 00:17:19,637 any idea that she's in danger? 339 00:17:19,741 --> 00:17:22,035 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Lisa had a Facebook account. 340 00:17:22,140 --> 00:17:23,566 And on her Facebook page, you could often 341 00:17:23,670 --> 00:17:25,131 see she was one of those people that loved 342 00:17:25,235 --> 00:17:26,557 those motivational sayings. 343 00:17:26,661 --> 00:17:30,416 You know, if opportunity doesn't knock, build a door, 344 00:17:30,521 --> 00:17:32,120 happiness is your birthright. 345 00:17:32,225 --> 00:17:33,162 She liked that kind of stuff. 346 00:17:33,268 --> 00:17:34,623 And usually it was positive. 347 00:17:34,728 --> 00:17:38,066 But there was this one post that she 348 00:17:38,171 --> 00:17:40,917 made that really got people's attention because it 349 00:17:41,021 --> 00:17:42,413 really wasn't like her. 350 00:17:42,518 --> 00:17:45,959 And she's posting about giving people a second chance. 351 00:17:46,063 --> 00:17:48,359 And she's warning against it. 352 00:17:48,463 --> 00:17:51,836 BRIAN HARRIS: If you give a person a second chance, 353 00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:56,044 it's like giving them another bullet to put in the gun. 354 00:17:56,148 --> 00:17:57,852 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: We don't know if Lisa is 355 00:17:57,955 --> 00:18:00,147 scared of Thomas at this point. 356 00:18:00,252 --> 00:18:03,172 We do know she's counting down the days until she can 357 00:18:03,277 --> 00:18:04,945 start over with this new guy. 358 00:18:05,049 --> 00:18:07,171 CAROLYN CANVILLE: She's making plans. 359 00:18:07,275 --> 00:18:09,361 She is arranging her bank account. 360 00:18:09,465 --> 00:18:12,213 She's becoming financially independent. 361 00:18:12,317 --> 00:18:14,716 And she's also-- she's a yoga instructor. 362 00:18:14,821 --> 00:18:17,568 And she's also kind of stepping up her own routine because she 363 00:18:17,672 --> 00:18:19,515 wants to get in shape for this new life 364 00:18:19,619 --> 00:18:21,601 she's planning and this new person 365 00:18:21,705 --> 00:18:24,210 that she plans to be with. 366 00:18:24,314 --> 00:18:25,739 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Vinnie comes home 367 00:18:25,843 --> 00:18:28,556 from the Navy on leave in 2015. 368 00:18:28,660 --> 00:18:32,972 He hardly recognizes what his family has become. 369 00:18:33,076 --> 00:18:34,710 VINNIE INFANTE: Mom was never home. 370 00:18:34,815 --> 00:18:40,518 She was either always working or working seeing this guy. 371 00:18:40,622 --> 00:18:42,917 And then dad was just so depressed he 372 00:18:43,021 --> 00:18:45,073 didn't want to do anything, didn't want to hang out with 373 00:18:45,177 --> 00:18:46,845 us. 374 00:18:46,950 --> 00:18:48,481 And then I just remember getting angry 375 00:18:48,585 --> 00:18:50,845 at her for never being around. 376 00:18:50,949 --> 00:18:52,339 Because I'm like, mom, I haven't seen you 377 00:18:52,444 --> 00:18:57,591 in months, almost a year, and you're just not here. 378 00:18:57,695 --> 00:18:59,712 I miss you. 379 00:18:59,817 --> 00:19:03,086 It was rough because they were doing their own thing. 380 00:19:03,190 --> 00:19:06,041 And I just wanted some family time. 381 00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:09,274 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Do the Infante kids suspect that dad's 382 00:19:09,379 --> 00:19:10,595 going to become murderous? 383 00:19:10,700 --> 00:19:13,134 VINNIE INFANTE: Knowing him for the first 20 384 00:19:13,239 --> 00:19:15,534 years of my life, 20 plus years of my life, 385 00:19:15,638 --> 00:19:18,003 he was not like that. 386 00:19:18,107 --> 00:19:20,019 He wouldn't even go hunting with me. 387 00:19:20,123 --> 00:19:21,305 He would get too sensitive. 388 00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:22,731 He was, Oh I don't want to kill any deers. 389 00:19:22,835 --> 00:19:24,296 I don't want to kill Bambi. 390 00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:27,391 So he was just a sensitive guy. 391 00:19:27,495 --> 00:19:31,181 It's just not something he would do. 392 00:19:31,285 --> 00:19:38,275 But I guess you put so much on someone and anyone can break. 393 00:19:38,379 --> 00:19:42,066 [music playing] 394 00:19:54,652 --> 00:19:57,921 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: It's September 27, 2015, 395 00:19:58,025 --> 00:20:00,911 and the peace and quiet of Shelton, Connecticut 396 00:20:01,017 --> 00:20:05,294 is interrupted by a single gunshot inside a family home. 397 00:20:10,265 --> 00:20:12,664 VINNIE INFANTE: Way sometime in the evening, 398 00:20:12,768 --> 00:20:16,524 I get a call from my little brother, 399 00:20:16,629 --> 00:20:19,758 which is unusual because Matty usually never calls me. 400 00:20:19,862 --> 00:20:23,062 And I pick up, and he's like, Vinnie, you gotta come home. 401 00:20:23,167 --> 00:20:24,383 Mom's dead. 402 00:20:24,488 --> 00:20:28,243 BRIAN HARRIS: But in that moment, where's the husband? 403 00:20:28,347 --> 00:20:31,303 Where's the father of the children? 404 00:20:31,407 --> 00:20:32,484 He has fled. 405 00:20:32,589 --> 00:20:34,188 He has grabbed alcohol. 406 00:20:34,293 --> 00:20:37,250 He has grabbed medication, and he's gone. 407 00:20:39,682 --> 00:20:42,639 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: What is going on with everyone here? 408 00:20:42,744 --> 00:20:44,448 The younger kids are at home, but Vinnie 409 00:20:44,552 --> 00:20:46,185 is in a celebration mode. 410 00:20:46,289 --> 00:20:48,203 The night before was a big one. 411 00:20:48,307 --> 00:20:51,402 VINNIE INFANTE: It was my fiance's birthday party. 412 00:20:51,506 --> 00:20:56,373 My parents came, first time that my parents met her parents. 413 00:20:56,478 --> 00:20:59,469 I stayed over her house that night, hung out with her 414 00:20:59,574 --> 00:21:03,154 the whole day because it was her birthday. 415 00:21:03,259 --> 00:21:06,249 CAROLYN CANVILLE: So Thomas is at work. 416 00:21:06,355 --> 00:21:07,988 Lisa puts the kids to bed. 417 00:21:08,093 --> 00:21:09,274 She gets dinner on. 418 00:21:09,378 --> 00:21:10,631 She feeds the kids. 419 00:21:10,735 --> 00:21:12,926 She kisses them goodnight, puts them to bed. 420 00:21:13,030 --> 00:21:15,185 She goes to her own bedroom. 421 00:21:15,290 --> 00:21:17,934 BRIAN HARRIS: Not much unlike many other homes 422 00:21:18,037 --> 00:21:20,575 across the United States. 423 00:21:20,681 --> 00:21:24,784 You have a wife in her master bedroom. 424 00:21:24,887 --> 00:21:29,617 Her children, whether they're on their phones, watching TV. 425 00:21:29,721 --> 00:21:31,181 It's life. 426 00:21:31,285 --> 00:21:33,859 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Yes, it's life. 427 00:21:33,963 --> 00:21:37,372 But it's about to be over for one member of the family. 428 00:21:37,475 --> 00:21:41,092 A couple of hours later, Lisa is found dead in the bed 429 00:21:41,196 --> 00:21:44,152 she once shared with her husband. 430 00:21:44,256 --> 00:21:46,377 CAROLYN CANVILLE: It's hard to believe. 431 00:21:46,481 --> 00:21:48,394 Could she have done this to herself? 432 00:21:48,499 --> 00:21:50,132 BRIAN HARRIS: So what has happened? 433 00:21:50,236 --> 00:21:51,801 It tells a story. 434 00:21:51,905 --> 00:21:53,957 When you look at the body positioning. 435 00:21:54,062 --> 00:21:58,616 The way the body is twisted on that bed. 436 00:21:58,721 --> 00:22:01,781 The door to the master bedroom opens. 437 00:22:01,885 --> 00:22:05,676 The victim sees who their assailant is, probably 438 00:22:05,780 --> 00:22:07,379 knows who their assailant is. 439 00:22:07,484 --> 00:22:11,066 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He's made sure he has ammunition for his gun. 440 00:22:11,170 --> 00:22:14,021 He has mapped out an escape route. 441 00:22:14,125 --> 00:22:17,429 BRIAN HARRIS: She knows that whoever came into this room 442 00:22:17,534 --> 00:22:19,306 is coming with a purpose. 443 00:22:19,411 --> 00:22:20,802 And it wasn't long. 444 00:22:20,906 --> 00:22:22,192 It was fast. 445 00:22:22,296 --> 00:22:23,444 It was quick. 446 00:22:23,548 --> 00:22:25,043 It was efficient. 447 00:22:25,148 --> 00:22:28,487 And so she turns and that is why she's 448 00:22:28,591 --> 00:22:32,103 shot in the back of her head. 449 00:22:32,207 --> 00:22:33,771 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Thomas Infante 450 00:22:33,875 --> 00:22:37,283 shoots Lisa, his wife of 27 years, 451 00:22:37,387 --> 00:22:41,179 and leaves her for the kids to find. 452 00:22:41,283 --> 00:22:43,195 VINNIE INFANTE: It was definitely hard. 453 00:22:43,300 --> 00:22:46,533 I know my siblings had totally different experiences. 454 00:22:46,637 --> 00:22:53,245 I know Harrison and Matt actually found her. 455 00:22:53,349 --> 00:22:58,112 I'm not sure if Kayla had witnessed it. 456 00:22:58,216 --> 00:23:00,443 I hope not. 457 00:23:00,547 --> 00:23:01,555 I know I didn't. 458 00:23:01,659 --> 00:23:03,084 It was probably for the best. 459 00:23:03,189 --> 00:23:05,972 I don't know if I can handle seeing my mother that way. 460 00:23:12,647 --> 00:23:15,812 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Once Thomas kills her, once he shoots her 461 00:23:15,916 --> 00:23:19,915 and he knows she's dead, he leaves. 462 00:23:20,019 --> 00:23:21,618 He grabs some pills. 463 00:23:21,722 --> 00:23:23,079 He grabs some alcohol. 464 00:23:23,183 --> 00:23:26,208 He takes off and he hits the road. 465 00:23:26,312 --> 00:23:28,676 VINNIE INFANTE: The whole day is kind of a blur 466 00:23:28,781 --> 00:23:32,572 because it was just totally life changing. 467 00:23:32,676 --> 00:23:36,015 And instantaneously, I didn't have my mother. 468 00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:40,117 I had no clue of what happened to my father. 469 00:23:40,221 --> 00:23:44,499 And I can only go on assumptions at that point. 470 00:23:44,603 --> 00:23:46,898 BRIAN HARRIS: This small town, this kind of crime 471 00:23:47,003 --> 00:23:52,391 doesn't happen in Shelton, Connecticut. 472 00:23:52,495 --> 00:23:54,793 But that peace and quiet who sat 911 one 473 00:23:54,897 --> 00:24:00,737 call of a son discovering the body of his own mother. 474 00:24:00,841 --> 00:24:03,033 VINNIE INFANTE: I did not believe it at all. 475 00:24:03,138 --> 00:24:06,336 I thought if anything she committed suicide. 476 00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:09,465 Because I know she was going through a lot, a lot, 477 00:24:09,569 --> 00:24:13,742 like between her boyfriend and the divorce. 478 00:24:13,847 --> 00:24:16,384 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: The cops arrive and try to make sense 479 00:24:16,489 --> 00:24:18,368 of what's happened and fast. 480 00:24:18,472 --> 00:24:22,401 Homicide is familiar territory for Brian Harris. 481 00:24:22,505 --> 00:24:24,731 What is a detective looking for right now? 482 00:24:24,835 --> 00:24:26,678 BRIAN HARRIS: One of the things as a homicide 483 00:24:26,783 --> 00:24:31,267 detective you're looking for is this a staged event. 484 00:24:31,372 --> 00:24:35,372 Is it an organized scene versus disorganized? 485 00:24:35,476 --> 00:24:37,527 Was there a sign of a struggle? 486 00:24:37,631 --> 00:24:39,648 Was there a fight? 487 00:24:39,752 --> 00:24:42,951 Are there pieces of furniture knocked over? 488 00:24:43,057 --> 00:24:44,377 What is happening? 489 00:24:44,482 --> 00:24:46,602 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: One thing is pretty clear, 490 00:24:46,706 --> 00:24:49,280 Lisa's husband is nowhere to be seen. 491 00:24:49,384 --> 00:24:51,853 VINNIE INFANTE: I mean, I had no clue what was going on. 492 00:24:51,956 --> 00:24:55,087 I tried calling my dad like a million times, 493 00:24:55,192 --> 00:24:56,652 could not get him on the phone. 494 00:24:56,756 --> 00:24:59,573 BRIAN HARRIS: The detectives, they want to find Thomas. 495 00:24:59,678 --> 00:25:01,728 He's clearly a person of interest. 496 00:25:01,833 --> 00:25:03,676 They need to find out. 497 00:25:03,780 --> 00:25:04,928 Where is he? 498 00:25:05,032 --> 00:25:08,613 Through all of this where is he? 499 00:25:08,717 --> 00:25:11,709 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Turns out, Thomas had hit the road. 500 00:25:11,813 --> 00:25:14,524 They track his cell phone and they see that he 501 00:25:14,628 --> 00:25:17,203 is already in Pennsylvania. 502 00:25:17,307 --> 00:25:19,532 And then all of a sudden, the phone goes dead. 503 00:25:19,637 --> 00:25:22,731 Somebody turned it off or the battery died. 504 00:25:22,836 --> 00:25:23,913 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: The cops get 505 00:25:24,017 --> 00:25:26,313 searching for Thomas Infante. 506 00:25:26,418 --> 00:25:28,957 Back at the house, it doesn't take detectives 507 00:25:29,061 --> 00:25:30,902 long to figure things out. 508 00:25:31,007 --> 00:25:34,102 BRIAN HARRIS: This crime scene, like many others, 509 00:25:34,206 --> 00:25:40,569 the evidence that is left behind is part of a bigger story. 510 00:25:40,673 --> 00:25:43,004 So there is a shell casing, a .380 shell 511 00:25:43,109 --> 00:25:44,811 casing, that is left behind. 512 00:25:44,916 --> 00:25:49,367 They didn't have time to look for that .380 shell casings. 513 00:25:49,471 --> 00:25:55,418 Because when shell casings get injected, they bounce. 514 00:25:55,522 --> 00:25:56,808 They move. 515 00:25:56,912 --> 00:25:59,834 Oftentimes, that position of that shell casing 516 00:25:59,937 --> 00:26:04,980 doesn't necessarily reflect where that person was standing. 517 00:26:05,085 --> 00:26:06,961 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: The two children in the house 518 00:26:07,065 --> 00:26:08,561 are questioned. 519 00:26:08,665 --> 00:26:11,274 It looks more and more like the killer is someone the family 520 00:26:11,378 --> 00:26:14,612 knows well, very well. 521 00:26:14,716 --> 00:26:19,342 BRIAN HARRIS: This killer did not spend time in this room. 522 00:26:19,445 --> 00:26:21,149 There were no drawers gone through. 523 00:26:21,253 --> 00:26:22,608 This wasn't a robbery. 524 00:26:22,713 --> 00:26:24,105 It was a single shot. 525 00:26:26,608 --> 00:26:29,807 The children aren't startled by any strangers in the home. 526 00:26:29,912 --> 00:26:32,763 Whoever did this the children felt comfortable 527 00:26:32,867 --> 00:26:34,049 with their presence. 528 00:26:34,154 --> 00:26:37,491 Whoever did this it was a personal attack. 529 00:26:37,596 --> 00:26:42,744 And once they did it, they knew they had to get out of there. 530 00:26:42,848 --> 00:26:45,559 VINNIE INFANTE: The whole family was distraught. 531 00:26:45,663 --> 00:26:48,098 Nobody really knew what was going on. 532 00:26:48,202 --> 00:26:49,802 Nobody knew where dad was. 533 00:26:52,200 --> 00:26:58,529 I think after a while we kind of like figured it out. 534 00:26:58,633 --> 00:27:00,059 At first, I can only-- 535 00:27:00,164 --> 00:27:01,659 I thought it was like-- 536 00:27:01,763 --> 00:27:03,084 I don't know like-- 537 00:27:03,189 --> 00:27:04,824 her boyfriend did it. 538 00:27:04,929 --> 00:27:08,266 Because I couldn't think that dad would do it. 539 00:27:08,370 --> 00:27:10,665 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: The priority for police right now 540 00:27:10,770 --> 00:27:12,995 has to be tracking down Thomas. 541 00:27:13,100 --> 00:27:15,915 He is the prime suspect in the murder. 542 00:27:16,020 --> 00:27:18,141 Who knows what he might do next. 543 00:27:18,246 --> 00:27:20,402 They track his phone signal again. 544 00:27:20,505 --> 00:27:22,522 BRIAN HARRIS: And what they're able to do then 545 00:27:22,626 --> 00:27:25,513 is track that cell phone. 546 00:27:25,618 --> 00:27:28,607 And they're following the signal for that cell phone. 547 00:27:28,713 --> 00:27:29,999 Where is it? 548 00:27:30,104 --> 00:27:33,649 It's like a homing device, a GPS. 549 00:27:33,754 --> 00:27:36,014 And where do they find him, but, hundreds, 550 00:27:36,118 --> 00:27:41,404 literally hundreds of miles away at the Pennsylvania, 551 00:27:41,508 --> 00:27:44,186 Ohio border. 552 00:27:44,290 --> 00:27:46,515 While the police are tracking this phone, 553 00:27:46,619 --> 00:27:47,525 and they're seeing it. 554 00:27:47,629 --> 00:27:50,027 It's in Pennsylvania 200 miles away. 555 00:27:50,131 --> 00:27:51,627 They lose the signal. 556 00:27:51,731 --> 00:27:56,182 Perhaps, the battery's dead or did this person turn it off. 557 00:27:56,287 --> 00:28:00,251 Did they have the mindset, I need to turn my phone off 558 00:28:00,355 --> 00:28:02,129 because they can find me that way. 559 00:28:02,232 --> 00:28:06,198 They've watched enough TV to know that that can be done. 560 00:28:06,302 --> 00:28:08,979 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He's almost to the Ohio State line 561 00:28:09,083 --> 00:28:17,429 and he realizes, oh gosh, I got to tell them what I did. 562 00:28:17,532 --> 00:28:20,453 BRIAN HARRIS: And lo and behold at the Shelton Police 563 00:28:20,557 --> 00:28:23,409 Department who walks through their front doors, 564 00:28:23,513 --> 00:28:26,782 but Thomas, Thomas himself. 565 00:28:26,887 --> 00:28:31,024 Wearing the same t-shirt with the blood on it, walks in turns 566 00:28:31,130 --> 00:28:34,119 himself into the police. 567 00:28:34,222 --> 00:28:35,684 CAROLYN CANVILLE: When he shows up 568 00:28:35,789 --> 00:28:38,188 there he's still wearing the same t-shirt he was wearing. 569 00:28:38,292 --> 00:28:41,005 It's soaked with his wife's blood. 570 00:28:41,109 --> 00:28:42,743 BRIAN HARRIS: That's how close. 571 00:28:42,847 --> 00:28:44,551 That's personal. 572 00:28:44,655 --> 00:28:46,672 He didn't just stand at the doorway 573 00:28:46,777 --> 00:28:48,550 and fire from a distance. 574 00:28:48,654 --> 00:28:51,993 As his wife went to get out of bed, 575 00:28:52,097 --> 00:28:53,905 he's not just slowly walking. 576 00:28:54,009 --> 00:28:59,259 He's marching towards her, gun pointed straight at her. 577 00:28:59,364 --> 00:29:04,441 And she twists and turns and he puts that gun right up on her. 578 00:29:04,545 --> 00:29:09,134 So close that when he pulls the trigger 579 00:29:09,238 --> 00:29:14,558 that there is blood that spatters up back on to him. 580 00:29:14,664 --> 00:29:18,141 It's that close and personal. 581 00:29:18,246 --> 00:29:20,297 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Thomas turns himself in. 582 00:29:20,401 --> 00:29:24,818 But he's not ready just yet to admit to this horrible crime. 583 00:29:24,922 --> 00:29:28,991 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He was kind of operating in this fugue state. 584 00:29:29,095 --> 00:29:33,406 So when he hits the road and he finally blacks out and comes 585 00:29:33,510 --> 00:29:35,562 to that's when he realizes he needs 586 00:29:35,666 --> 00:29:37,544 to tell police what he did. 587 00:29:37,649 --> 00:29:41,473 And that's when he shows up at the police station. 588 00:29:41,578 --> 00:29:45,507 BRIAN HARRIS: He's not ready to take responsibility. 589 00:29:45,611 --> 00:29:48,880 You see, he thought he was man enough to do what he did. 590 00:29:48,984 --> 00:29:52,844 But he wasn't man enough to accept the responsibility 591 00:29:52,949 --> 00:29:54,340 for his actions. 592 00:29:54,444 --> 00:29:55,835 So what does he do? 593 00:29:55,939 --> 00:30:02,094 He blames it on medicine, alcohol, he blacked out, 594 00:30:02,198 --> 00:30:05,154 remembers going to the house but after that, 595 00:30:05,258 --> 00:30:07,831 it's almost as if it's an outer body experience. 596 00:30:07,935 --> 00:30:13,255 He has no recollection of what took place. 597 00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:15,516 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Lisa is dead. 598 00:30:15,619 --> 00:30:19,236 Her husband is in custody charged with her murder. 599 00:30:19,341 --> 00:30:21,566 It should be a slam dunk case. 600 00:30:21,670 --> 00:30:24,000 But Thomas confesses to nothing. 601 00:30:24,105 --> 00:30:27,130 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He says he had some pills. 602 00:30:27,234 --> 00:30:28,521 He had some booze. 603 00:30:28,626 --> 00:30:30,850 And at some point, he just blacked out. 604 00:30:30,954 --> 00:30:33,701 He basically says he didn't really know 605 00:30:33,805 --> 00:30:35,267 what he was doing that night. 606 00:30:35,371 --> 00:30:37,840 He really didn't know what was going on. 607 00:30:37,944 --> 00:30:39,856 VINNIE INFANTE: And something snaps 608 00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:43,368 and short circuited his mind. 609 00:30:43,472 --> 00:30:46,497 Everything kind of just build up, build up, build up, 610 00:30:46,603 --> 00:30:48,619 and at a certain point, just cracked. 611 00:30:53,661 --> 00:30:58,425 [music playing] 612 00:31:09,656 --> 00:31:14,003 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Lisa Infante, mother of four, dead. 613 00:31:14,107 --> 00:31:17,029 Two days later, Thomas, the man she was trying to leave, 614 00:31:17,133 --> 00:31:21,061 appears in court charged with first degree murder. 615 00:31:21,166 --> 00:31:23,184 Detectives say Tom's already told them 616 00:31:23,288 --> 00:31:25,999 he shot her during an argument. 617 00:31:26,105 --> 00:31:29,721 But in court, he's admitting nothing. 618 00:31:29,825 --> 00:31:32,815 After nearly three years in the Northern Correctional 619 00:31:32,919 --> 00:31:35,215 Institute in Somers, Connecticut, 620 00:31:35,319 --> 00:31:37,683 his trial date comes around. 621 00:31:37,787 --> 00:31:39,770 CAROLYN CANVILLE: So Thomas has plead not guilty. 622 00:31:39,874 --> 00:31:41,995 And his trial is about to begin. 623 00:31:42,099 --> 00:31:43,873 They're going to go into jury selection. 624 00:31:43,977 --> 00:31:47,523 But on the eve of his trial, he decides to take a plea. 625 00:31:47,629 --> 00:31:50,584 And Thomas pleads to a reduced charge. 626 00:31:50,688 --> 00:31:54,131 BRIAN HARRIS: It doesn't fall on deaf ears to the prosecutors, 627 00:31:54,234 --> 00:31:59,451 to the defense team about the staggering domestic violence 628 00:31:59,555 --> 00:32:01,537 stats that are out there. 629 00:32:01,641 --> 00:32:07,239 It doesn't fall on deaf ears that the victim herself, 630 00:32:07,344 --> 00:32:11,935 her life, she will be judged about the choices that she 631 00:32:12,039 --> 00:32:14,820 made, not only to leave her husband, 632 00:32:14,924 --> 00:32:17,463 but that she was ready to move on. 633 00:32:17,568 --> 00:32:19,827 And what kind of picture were they going to paint? 634 00:32:19,932 --> 00:32:24,313 That she was some harlequin that was having an affair? 635 00:32:24,417 --> 00:32:25,808 VINNIE INFANTE: But then also a lot of things 636 00:32:25,913 --> 00:32:27,581 came out of the woodwork afterwards 637 00:32:27,685 --> 00:32:31,128 finding out that she cheated on dad 15 638 00:32:31,233 --> 00:32:34,119 years prior with the same guy. 639 00:32:34,223 --> 00:32:39,161 So I guess my parents did a good job at covering things up. 640 00:32:39,265 --> 00:32:42,291 BRIAN HARRIS: You see, in life, but also in death, 641 00:32:42,395 --> 00:32:45,072 we have to treat our victims with dignity. 642 00:32:45,176 --> 00:32:47,194 And this was the chance for the state 643 00:32:47,298 --> 00:32:50,984 to treat the victim with dignity, while at the same time 644 00:32:51,088 --> 00:32:53,939 issuing punishment to the perpetrator. 645 00:32:54,044 --> 00:32:56,339 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He pleads to first degree 646 00:32:56,443 --> 00:33:01,971 manslaughter, committed under extreme emotional disturbance. 647 00:33:02,077 --> 00:33:04,546 So this, we can imagine, is the mitigating 648 00:33:04,650 --> 00:33:08,300 factor, which is going to affect how we sentenced. 649 00:33:08,404 --> 00:33:09,517 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Tom's lawyer 650 00:33:09,621 --> 00:33:11,883 pleads for a lenient sentence. 651 00:33:11,986 --> 00:33:15,916 He tells the court his client has been under extreme pressure 652 00:33:16,020 --> 00:33:19,532 in the weeks and months leading up to the shooting. 653 00:33:19,636 --> 00:33:23,601 That is something that Vinnie's happy to corroborate. 654 00:33:23,705 --> 00:33:25,687 VINNIE INFANTE: My sister, I think a couple of weeks 655 00:33:25,792 --> 00:33:29,895 before everything happened, I guess she was doing some 656 00:33:29,999 --> 00:33:33,162 off roading on her dirt bike. 657 00:33:33,266 --> 00:33:36,502 Hit a fence from what I've heard. 658 00:33:36,606 --> 00:33:37,961 Went over the handlebars. 659 00:33:38,066 --> 00:33:41,578 And the handlebar like stabbed her in the stomach. 660 00:33:41,682 --> 00:33:43,525 So my mom was working. 661 00:33:43,630 --> 00:33:45,819 She picked her up in an ambulance. 662 00:33:45,924 --> 00:33:50,097 And she was with her through the whole thing. 663 00:33:50,201 --> 00:33:52,321 That was really hard for dad. 664 00:33:52,427 --> 00:33:54,791 I know he was in the hospital with her almost every day. 665 00:33:54,896 --> 00:33:55,834 So was mom. 666 00:33:58,373 --> 00:34:00,633 So that was really hard on the whole family. 667 00:34:00,737 --> 00:34:03,588 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: The same month one of the Infante boys 668 00:34:03,692 --> 00:34:06,648 had ended up in the hospital after an accident 669 00:34:06,753 --> 00:34:08,039 on his four Wheeler. 670 00:34:08,143 --> 00:34:10,126 VINNIE INFANTE: Same time period. 671 00:34:10,230 --> 00:34:15,098 My brother was up in Maine and got into a quadding accident. 672 00:34:15,203 --> 00:34:16,629 So he was in the hospital. 673 00:34:16,733 --> 00:34:20,557 It was just a really hard time for dad seeing three 674 00:34:20,661 --> 00:34:23,339 of his kids away from them. 675 00:34:23,444 --> 00:34:27,338 Two of them in hospital. 676 00:34:27,442 --> 00:34:29,704 And then in between mom cheating one 677 00:34:29,807 --> 00:34:32,415 him and him hating his job and everything else 678 00:34:32,518 --> 00:34:34,850 going on in his life, I mean, a guy can only take 679 00:34:34,954 --> 00:34:36,484 so much the way I look at it. 680 00:34:36,588 --> 00:34:39,612 It's like his whole world was falling apart. 681 00:34:39,716 --> 00:34:41,457 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Even though they're virtually 682 00:34:41,561 --> 00:34:45,036 orphans, even though they're still devastated by their mom's 683 00:34:45,141 --> 00:34:47,681 death, some of Tom Infante's kids 684 00:34:47,785 --> 00:34:53,140 still refuse to believe that their dad is a killer. 685 00:34:53,245 --> 00:34:58,181 CAROLYN CANVILLE: To testify that while her father really 686 00:34:58,285 --> 00:35:01,693 loved her mother but she could not remember a time 687 00:35:01,797 --> 00:35:04,197 when the couple ever got along. 688 00:35:04,302 --> 00:35:08,161 And that seemed to be backed up by a lot of people. 689 00:35:08,265 --> 00:35:10,281 VINNIE INFANTE: Some people think that there's 690 00:35:10,387 --> 00:35:12,230 sides to the whole thing. 691 00:35:12,334 --> 00:35:13,759 You're either on mom's side or your 692 00:35:13,864 --> 00:35:17,271 on dad's side, which is totally not the case 693 00:35:17,376 --> 00:35:21,583 because I know at least, in my shoes, I loved both of them 694 00:35:21,687 --> 00:35:22,905 equally. 695 00:35:23,010 --> 00:35:24,956 They're my parents. 696 00:35:25,061 --> 00:35:26,763 I can't take sides. 697 00:35:26,868 --> 00:35:28,259 I know dad did what he did. 698 00:35:28,364 --> 00:35:31,876 Mom did what she did. 699 00:35:31,980 --> 00:35:35,145 They both did bad things. 700 00:35:35,249 --> 00:35:41,439 But I can't really say I love one more than the other, 701 00:35:41,543 --> 00:35:43,038 even after everything that happened. 702 00:35:45,576 --> 00:35:51,869 But you just can't take sides to the whole circumstance. 703 00:35:51,974 --> 00:35:53,922 CAROLYN CANVILLE: The daughter's very close to dad. 704 00:35:54,027 --> 00:35:55,244 She's very defensive. 705 00:35:55,348 --> 00:35:58,059 And she says dad just wanted to be loved. 706 00:35:58,163 --> 00:35:59,103 That's all he wanted. 707 00:35:59,207 --> 00:36:00,528 He just wanted to be cared for. 708 00:36:00,632 --> 00:36:02,650 He loved my mom. 709 00:36:02,754 --> 00:36:04,180 They never got along. 710 00:36:04,284 --> 00:36:06,440 I can't remember a time when they ever got along. 711 00:36:06,545 --> 00:36:07,726 There was a lot of abuse. 712 00:36:07,830 --> 00:36:08,977 There was a lot of fighting. 713 00:36:09,083 --> 00:36:10,892 There was a lot of pain on both sides. 714 00:36:10,996 --> 00:36:13,464 But daddy always loved mom. 715 00:36:13,569 --> 00:36:15,619 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Prosecutors are not 716 00:36:15,724 --> 00:36:17,393 buying this version of events. 717 00:36:17,498 --> 00:36:22,088 Witnesses describe Thomas Infante as unpleasant, violent, 718 00:36:22,192 --> 00:36:23,792 maybe even abusive. 719 00:36:23,896 --> 00:36:27,686 They describe Lisa as a woman who was finally ready to break 720 00:36:27,790 --> 00:36:30,884 free of a toxic marriage. 721 00:36:30,990 --> 00:36:32,936 BRIAN HARRIS: She was a mother that 722 00:36:33,041 --> 00:36:35,614 was in a relationship crisis. 723 00:36:35,718 --> 00:36:38,082 She had come to a point in her life 724 00:36:38,186 --> 00:36:41,074 where she had made the decision that this marriage 725 00:36:41,178 --> 00:36:44,168 to her husband was indeed going to end. 726 00:36:44,273 --> 00:36:46,220 She was ready to move on and even had 727 00:36:46,324 --> 00:36:48,828 found another love interest. 728 00:36:48,932 --> 00:36:51,401 KAREN JARMOC: There's always a history. 729 00:36:51,504 --> 00:36:52,826 There's always a history. 730 00:36:52,931 --> 00:36:56,199 This just doesn't extemporaneously occur one day. 731 00:36:56,303 --> 00:36:58,181 There's always a history and, generally, 732 00:36:58,286 --> 00:36:59,747 it's some kind of a build up. 733 00:36:59,850 --> 00:37:05,206 CAROLYN CANVILLE: Thomas was a dark and sullen character. 734 00:37:05,310 --> 00:37:07,291 He was depressed. 735 00:37:07,396 --> 00:37:09,934 But some of that depression, I think you could argue, 736 00:37:10,038 --> 00:37:11,534 was of his own making. 737 00:37:11,638 --> 00:37:19,496 He didn't take steps to change, and he didn't ask for help. 738 00:37:19,601 --> 00:37:22,173 KAREN JARMOC: This is not behavior 739 00:37:22,278 --> 00:37:24,921 that you can blame on, oh, so-and-so 740 00:37:25,025 --> 00:37:26,590 was drinking that day. 741 00:37:26,694 --> 00:37:29,268 Yes, OK, they may have been drinking that day, 742 00:37:29,372 --> 00:37:34,971 but that behavior has to exist in that individual before. 743 00:37:35,075 --> 00:37:38,657 In fact, the prosecutors say that this could even have 744 00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:40,361 been a premeditated attack. 745 00:37:40,465 --> 00:37:44,394 BRIAN HARRIS: This is a man that had to leave a location where 746 00:37:44,498 --> 00:37:48,462 he was because he was no longer in the home, came in the home, 747 00:37:48,567 --> 00:37:51,208 knew his children were going to be in there. 748 00:37:51,313 --> 00:37:54,165 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He's made sure that he 749 00:37:54,270 --> 00:37:55,904 has ammunition for his gun. 750 00:37:56,008 --> 00:37:57,607 BRIAN HARRIS: Fired one round. 751 00:38:00,633 --> 00:38:03,344 So he brought a weapon into the home. 752 00:38:03,449 --> 00:38:05,988 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He coldly grabbed a gun 753 00:38:06,092 --> 00:38:10,751 and held it to her head and pulled the trigger 754 00:38:10,856 --> 00:38:13,811 and ripped her life away. 755 00:38:13,916 --> 00:38:16,489 BRIAN HARRIS: Then takes medicine, 756 00:38:16,593 --> 00:38:19,410 takes alcohol, and tries to flee. 757 00:38:19,514 --> 00:38:23,687 But he quickly realizes the gig is going to go up. 758 00:38:23,791 --> 00:38:26,712 It's not a crime of passion because he never claims that. 759 00:38:26,816 --> 00:38:29,216 He never paints himself as a victim. 760 00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:31,164 What does he do instead? 761 00:38:31,268 --> 00:38:32,554 I blacked out. 762 00:38:32,659 --> 00:38:34,536 I have no recollection. 763 00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:35,927 I can't remember. 764 00:38:36,031 --> 00:38:38,013 I don't recall. 765 00:38:38,118 --> 00:38:41,942 It's the big blackout bad guy defense. 766 00:38:42,048 --> 00:38:43,959 It's not a crime of passion. 767 00:38:44,063 --> 00:38:45,003 This was well thought out. 768 00:38:45,107 --> 00:38:46,220 It was premeditated. 769 00:38:46,325 --> 00:38:49,489 Now, how it was executed, a poor plan. 770 00:38:49,592 --> 00:38:51,644 But he darn sure knew what he was doing. 771 00:38:51,748 --> 00:38:53,730 CAROLYN CANVILLE: He got his way. 772 00:38:53,835 --> 00:38:56,894 Thomas said, if I can't have her, 773 00:38:56,998 --> 00:39:00,129 no one will, and he killed her. 774 00:39:00,233 --> 00:39:03,918 No one can have Lisa now because Thomas pulled that trigger. 775 00:39:04,022 --> 00:39:06,840 Thomas made the ultimate decision. 776 00:39:06,944 --> 00:39:10,214 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: When he sentences Thomas Infante 777 00:39:10,318 --> 00:39:15,915 the superior court judge tells him people, for the most part, 778 00:39:16,019 --> 00:39:18,731 don't take the life of another person. 779 00:39:18,835 --> 00:39:20,922 It's a shame, he said. 780 00:39:21,027 --> 00:39:22,731 You couldn't keep the photographs 781 00:39:22,836 --> 00:39:25,373 of your four children in your head 782 00:39:25,477 --> 00:39:28,642 and understand what was happening. 783 00:39:28,746 --> 00:39:31,389 Thomas is sentenced to 40 years in prison. 784 00:39:31,493 --> 00:39:35,840 Some of that term could be suspended after 25 years. 785 00:39:35,944 --> 00:39:40,187 BRIAN HARRIS: He will remain in jail until he's over 80 years 786 00:39:40,292 --> 00:39:44,394 old, at least 25 calendar years before he's 787 00:39:44,498 --> 00:39:47,246 even eligible for parole. 788 00:39:47,350 --> 00:39:50,409 What no homicide detective can explain 789 00:39:50,514 --> 00:39:55,835 is how a father can do this to his own kids' mom. 790 00:39:55,939 --> 00:39:59,520 That can't be explained. 791 00:39:59,625 --> 00:40:01,779 People often talk about quick closure. 792 00:40:01,884 --> 00:40:05,849 That there's closure when a homicide case is solved. 793 00:40:05,952 --> 00:40:08,943 There's never any closure. 794 00:40:09,047 --> 00:40:10,230 VINNIE INFANTE: It was definitely 795 00:40:10,334 --> 00:40:13,080 hard to get through it. 796 00:40:13,186 --> 00:40:18,124 It was a lot all at once, and nobody 797 00:40:18,228 --> 00:40:24,347 should ever go through that, especially kids our age. 798 00:40:24,451 --> 00:40:26,469 No matter what age you are I guess it's hard. 799 00:40:28,868 --> 00:40:31,511 Some forgive dad, some don't. 800 00:40:31,615 --> 00:40:33,701 Some can talk to him, some can't. 801 00:40:36,171 --> 00:40:38,082 It's just really hard. 802 00:40:38,186 --> 00:40:39,994 You can't let it hold you back. 803 00:40:40,100 --> 00:40:42,986 If you eat you alive, I mean, a lot 804 00:40:43,090 --> 00:40:46,532 of people they would just go down the hole and never return. 805 00:40:49,036 --> 00:40:52,966 BRIAN HARRIS: Those children will grow up without a father. 806 00:40:53,070 --> 00:40:56,024 And the deep wounds and scars of knowing 807 00:40:56,129 --> 00:40:59,537 that their mother was murdered and that she knew what 808 00:40:59,642 --> 00:41:00,824 was coming. 809 00:41:00,928 --> 00:41:03,501 It's a lifelong of pain and healing 810 00:41:03,605 --> 00:41:06,110 that that family is going to have to go through. 811 00:41:06,214 --> 00:41:07,987 VINNIE INFANTE: The whole aftermath of it really 812 00:41:08,091 --> 00:41:10,526 kind of tore the family apart. 813 00:41:10,630 --> 00:41:13,308 No one goes to the birthday parties 814 00:41:13,412 --> 00:41:16,681 or Thanksgiving or Christmases any more together. 815 00:41:19,079 --> 00:41:20,610 Me and my brothers and sisters were 816 00:41:20,714 --> 00:41:25,129 still really close, which that's the most important thing to me. 817 00:41:25,233 --> 00:41:29,199 I wish everybody could work together and be 818 00:41:29,302 --> 00:41:32,049 one big, happy family again, but I don't think 819 00:41:32,153 --> 00:41:33,474 that will ever be the case. 820 00:41:41,613 --> 00:41:43,802 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Lisa and Thomas Infante 821 00:41:43,907 --> 00:41:47,141 were childhood friends and high school sweethearts. 822 00:41:47,246 --> 00:41:50,165 They were married for 27 years. 823 00:41:50,269 --> 00:41:53,157 But only a few of them were good. 824 00:41:53,261 --> 00:41:55,348 Depressed and facing the prospect 825 00:41:55,452 --> 00:42:00,389 of losing her to another man, he made the devastating decision 826 00:42:00,493 --> 00:42:01,953 to kill her. 827 00:42:02,059 --> 00:42:04,180 VINNIE INFANTE: The way I want my mother to be remembered 828 00:42:04,284 --> 00:42:07,587 is not that she cheated on my dad 829 00:42:07,691 --> 00:42:12,663 because that's not her personality. 830 00:42:12,768 --> 00:42:13,950 She was an EMT. 831 00:42:14,054 --> 00:42:16,489 She helped out the community. 832 00:42:16,593 --> 00:42:17,846 Helped out people. 833 00:42:17,949 --> 00:42:20,279 I would just like people to know her 834 00:42:20,384 --> 00:42:27,649 as a loving mother, as a great person, great personality, 835 00:42:27,755 --> 00:42:29,598 awesome to hang out with. 836 00:42:29,703 --> 00:42:32,693 I even actually miss shopping with her, 837 00:42:32,797 --> 00:42:34,398 just like grocery shopping. 838 00:42:34,502 --> 00:42:39,473 And I really just took that for granted growing up. 839 00:42:39,577 --> 00:42:44,272 But now there's like nothing I wouldn't do just to go grocery 840 00:42:44,376 --> 00:42:45,594 shopping with her again. 841 00:42:48,376 --> 00:42:50,113 MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG: Remember, the person 842 00:42:50,217 --> 00:42:55,051 most likely to kill you may be the person you married. 843 00:42:55,156 --> 00:42:57,624 I'm Michelle Trachtenberg, and I'll see you 844 00:42:57,729 --> 00:43:02,771 next time on "Meet Mary Murder" 845 00:43:02,875 --> 00:43:06,492 [theme music]