This programme contains some scenes which some viewers may find upsetting,
strong language and discriminatory language
Anyway, there's this fourth-year kid and he's won a football,
a box of chocolates and a bottle of wine, and I'm like, "Bloody hell,
"I'm going to get this lad to do me lottery numbers."
And then he comes up again, another winning ticket,
and this time it's a 20-year-old scotch.
So, I'm like, "Right, OK, something's up."
So I go, "All right, lad, empty your pockets."
And he's only gone and got a matching book of tickets.
He got it online, the enterprising little sod.
No, no, but that's not the worst bit.
I'm stood there wondering what to do, right,
and then he says, "I'm going to cut you a deal,
"You keep your mouth shut for the box of chocs." What did you do?
The cheeky little bastard. I said, "You can't buy me off with a box
"of pralines, give me the scotch!"
THEY LAUGH
PHONE VIBRATES
I've got to go. No. You're not leaving me with all the surgeons.
Come on. They're loving the big builder.
Just tell 'em they can have a go driving the van.
I'm sure I won't be long. What does he want this time?
I'm so sorry, everyone, something's come up.
But this has been so lovely, we'll do it again soon.
Julia, you sign me up for the fete,
but probably not the tombola this time.
I am leaving my better half with you, so please be gentle.
Bye, everyone. ALL: Bye!
DRUNKEN LAUGHTER
OUTGOING DIALLING TONE
What is it?
Yeah, I know the one. How long ago?
And there's no-one else who c...
I hope he knows what he's asking.
ENGINE STARTS
PHONE RINGTONE
NERVOUS BREATHING
RINGTONE CONTINUES
RINGTONE STOPS
RINGTONE STARTS
FAINT CRIES
RINGING TONE
You all right? Fine. All done.
You still there? I reckon I can make last orders.
No, I'm home. Took a taxi.
I knew you'd bail, you big loser.
Don't wait up! I love ya.
SIREN WAILS
Why don't you try catching some real criminals for a change?
Ma'am, I'm so sorry.
That's why I recognised your car. Nah, you're all right.
What's going on, was I weaving?
We're pulling over everything,
a body's just been found at an old boozer up the road in Bramley.
Shot, looks like.
Drug paraphernalia?
One for us, then.
Well, Phil Cowper's on tonight,
so just poke him with a stick if you have to.
Now...
..do you want to breathalyse me?
No.
Night, DI Slack.
ENGINE STARTS
RUNNING WATER
You still up? It's half past midnight.
No, I'm asleep in bed, this is astral projection.
Dad said you got called away. Left him with all the drunk mums.
Yeah. Just work shite.
Oh, your dad were dead awkward, though, you should've seen it.
You know when his head goes all red?
Oh...
You still feeling peaky, I take it?
Yeah. Slept too long earlier.
You do feel warm.
Keep popping the paracetamol.
You got enough water?
TAPS BOTTLE
Who's this fella, then?
Don't know yet.
Can't get his claw quite right, though.
You'll crack it.
Crack it! You having that? Come on, cos it's a crab.
Come on, laughter's the best medicine.
Oh, I think I just felt this virus turn into terminal cancer.
Oh, well.
Don't stay up too late.
You all good? Yeah.
How long did you stay with your fan club?
About an hour.
I let them hold my big drill.
What did he need you for? Just a bit of paperwork.
We should get some sleep.
We're out again tomorrow night.
Two nights on the spin at our age - get us.
Who do you think he's texting?
Oh, God knows.
Who cares? He's happy. That's all that matters.
Oh, you are bordering on gamey, my friend.
We've got to go in half an hour.
Oh, God. OK, here it comes.
He's still got a temperature.
Maybe it's best I skip tonight. Keep an eye on him.
It's a virus, Ceri. I know you don't want to come,
but don't try and weasel out of it by using our son.
He's gone to a lot of effort, he's expecting us.
Don't you want to see the house?
I've seen it.
Couple of years ago. It's changed a lot.
Well, I didn't like it then either.
After everything he's done for us, you can't do one evening?
And what about everything you've done for him? Keep your voice down.
What was last night all about?
Paperwork? Bollocks.
Oh, now you want to know details? You never did before!
Well, he never used to call you out at night, Lou.
Something's changed over the last year. You've been doing more.
I just wish things were different, that's all.
Oh, different? Different how?
Do you wish we'd gone bankrupt?
Do you wish we were still in that basement flat in Chapeltown,
with neighbours chucking pit bull shit over the fence?
Do you wish Owen was still in the old school, with those bastards
gobbing down the back of his neck every morning? Calling him a faggot.
Assuming that you don't, my advice to you would be to show
a little bit of appreciation
and then you can go right back to sticking your head in the sand.
OK, fine.
Don't come. Don't go. I have to, and I want to.
Don't wait up.
Right, Sick-note. I'm off.
Argh. It's off for a reason.
Won't be long now, Mother. We should reconcile before my passing.
Yeah, yeah, your dad's bottled it.
He can't go out more than twice in a week it seems.
So, take another two ibuprofen.
It's just a dinner party thing so I won't be back late.
Say "hi" to the other middle-aged swingers for me.
Oh, we don't talk. We just...
SLAPS HAND Urgh, you're disgusting.
Night, sweetheart.
DOOR OPENS AND SHUTS
Evening, Bulge. Just you? Just me.
How you doing, Slack? You all right, darling?
Ah, Noel! They're finally letting you drive the Range?
Did you learn your left from your right? Ha!
Why are you always so mean to me?
You hear that, Bulge? That's bullying, is that.
Noel'll hold on to your phone for the evening. I know.
Oh, yes.
I Like what you've done there.
Ah, don't, ah...
They got chipped up, didn't they?
Anybody asks, you met a friend in the pub.
They'll do a bill. You paid cash.
Landlady'll say anything we want her to say.
Can she say I were really nice, dead funny and left a big tip?
You're an absolute joker, you.
Lou! Oh, lovely to see you, Alma.
Lovely to see you, too.
Oh, you look beautiful. Ah, thank you, so do you.
Ceri sends his apologies, but Owen's not very well,
so he's going to stay with him. Is he all right?
Oh, yeah, just a bug, it's fine. Oh, good.
All right, Lou! Bloody hell, Donal, when did you become your dad?
Trying me best not to!
Go and find him, will you? Everybody's here. Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
I had to send him back up.
The first shirt he came down in was absolutely horrendous.
So, how are you, Lou? Fair to middling, Curtis. You?
Life is good.
This is Elise.
Nice to put a face to the name. Finally.
Oh, usually only see this face when you've been bad.
Christ! Would you look at this rabble?
Lord Roy. Darling. Good to see ya.
Elise, nice to see ya.
Bulge. Boss.
Jesus, Juliet, you're still with us!
Did the last stroke not finish you off? Not quite!
Not that this one would've mentioned it.
Would he? He wouldn't.
Come here you.
Where's the big man?
Couldn't make it cos Owen's poorly.
Oh, he's a good dad.
He is.
Thank you.
Open it alone. Happy birthday.
Very thoughtful of you.
Maybe pop it in the wee safe for now, Bulge.
Right, well, now you've all finally decided to turn up, let's eat!
# Happy birthday to you
# Happy birthday dear Col
# Happy birthday to you. #
Is that our building? Mm-hm.
Our first building.
Out of many.
APPLAUSE
CHEERING
ALL: Ohhhh!
Speech! Speech! Yeah, speech!
Yeah, go on. You're not getting away with it, Dad.
I haven't bored you all enough already? No, keep going.
Come on. We love it.
OK, um...
I'll be brief for once.
Err, I'm a lucky man.
Made it to yet another birthday in a challenging line of work.
Despite some people's best efforts!
It's hard to get close to people in this business,
but you lot are the people that I rely on.
People that I love.
People that I trust.
Couldn't ask for more than that.
Well, maybe that's not true.
Alma...
Thank you for throwing it all away on me, all those years ago.
You remain my world.
Donal, my boy.
We've had our ups and downs, you know, more downs than ups,
if we're honest, but I love you, no matter what.
Bulgey, what would I do without you, eh?
Lord Roy, the king of the decimal point.
And, err, finally,
our wee guest of honour.
The reason why we're pouring our own drinks tonight.
I wouldn't be here without you.
So, here's to me, obviously,
but here's to you too, Lou.
To Lou. ALL: To Lou!
Right. Cake.
DOOR SHUTS
Alma would castrate me and strangle me
and then bury me in un-consecrated ground if she knew.
Ceri would just look disappointed. Oooh.
Which is worse. So much worse.
LIGHTER CLICKS
Place looks nice.
Did you paint? I don't fucking know. Probably.
Listen, about yesterday...
Don't ask me to do something like that again, Col.
It were too close. No, I know. I know.
And I'm sorry.
There just wasn't anyone else.
Anyone I could trust, you know?
If I'd sent one of my young lads to that crime scene, fuck me,
they're leaving half a pound of chromosomes behind.
If not their fucking birth certificate.
What the hell happened?
Endri's crew thought they'd cook gear on my patch.
I thought otherwise.
Sent a couple of the lads down to press the point,
things got out of hand.
But, look, it's on me.
The shooter's a wee Barry Big Bollocks.
Should never have used him for this.
Do I know him?
No. no.
He's gone on a nice long holiday as of this morning.
Tour of southern Europe.
He was still alive.
What? The lad.
He was still breathing. Just.
But he was dead when they found him, no?
Which was, what, five minutes after you were there? Ten?
So, then, past saving.
You've been pushing hard the last few months.
Just fixing the barn roof while the sun's shining.
Nothing more than that?
Not that I'm aware of.
And look...
I meant what I said in there.
I would not be where I am today without you.
Same here.
And you know that, you old git.
Old...
Best head back in separately, eh?
Or they'll think we're shagging.
Nice to see ya'. Look after yourself. You, too.
Come on, Curtis.
And get your teeth sorted, you knobhead, or they'll go bad.
I will, I will. I promise! Bye, love.
Catch you later.
PHONE VIBRATES
Lou, it's Owen, just go straight to the hospital.
OUTGOING RINGING TONE
Pick up! Pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up. Pick up!
VOICEMAIL: It's Ceri, leave a message.
Urgh! Fucking hell.
How is he? I don't know.
The doctor's on his way now. What happened?
I went in to check on him about nine, but he was asleep,
so I left him.
I went back in at midnight and he had this rash. All over.
I couldn't wake him up.
You didn't check on him for three hours? What?
He could've been like that the whole time.
Well, where were you? You didn't check on him for three hours?
Mr and Mrs Davies? I'm Dr Bhaskari,
I'm the A&E consultant on call tonight.
I'm afraid Owen is quite unwell.
He has bacterial meningitis.
Right now we're doing everything we can to get the cranial
pressure down and help his body fight the infection.
We really need him to show something in the next few hours,
but this will be a very long night.
I should get back to Owen.
Don't go anywhere.
They think he's going to die.
Please don't die. Please don't die.
Please don't die. Please don't die. please don't...
I'll be better.
DOOR CLOSES
FOOTSTEPS
OK. Right...
So, we've still got a long way to go,
but Owen finally began to respond to treatment about an hour ago.
Against some stiff odds, his condition has stabilised.
Back soon to tell you more. Thank you.
Owen?
Hiya, Owen, love.
It's me and Dad.
Wh-wh-wh...
Hey, it's OK. You're in hospital, son.
It's OK.
You've been a bit poorly,
but you're OK.
You're going to be all right.
Look at me. You're going to be all right, I promise.
He could be deaf.
He could be brain damaged.
Can you stop reading that shit?
You're going to have to tell your mum.
I will. OK, I will.
I should get some air.
See you in a bit.
Is he all right?
He almost died.
Hey, I know.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Anything that he needs, OK?
Anything at all. You call me.
Call me. OK. Yeah? Thank you.
You should get back in - you're exposed.
All right, tell Ceri I... I will.
The swelling in Owen's brain has subsided,
but there is some damage.
A bit like he's suffered a number of small strokes.
So, there will be some after-effects going forward.
Like what? What are you expecting?
We see things like hearing loss,
memory loss, other cognitive issues.
Problems with movement and co-ordination.
He will have headaches and fatigue, for sure.
And there is the psychological impact.
Jesus Christ...
But do kids die of this, at his age?
Have you seen that?
Certainly.
I have lost young patients to a MEN B infection.
Others have lost limbs through sepsis.
Owen might have been very lucky.
We'll know in the next few weeks.
Don't look at your feet.
PHONE BUZZES
Chin up...
..and shoulders down.
I know!
I can walk.
It just kills.
I want to try again.
I won't freak.
Go on, then.
The instinct will be to grip it tight but try to stay loose.
Mum. Stop helicoptering.
Sorry.
You've been here all day, every day.
I'm just saying.
DRILL WHIRS
Fuck's sake! What it is now?
He wouldn't have been able to open these, would he?
Not with his hands like they are.
I'm sorry.
Do you remember how you used to...
You sure? Mm-hm.
I think I'm going to go back to work.
Are you sure you're ready?
No. But Owen is.
Back to both jobs, you mean?
They go together, Cer.
POLICE OFFICER: Morning, Ma'am.
Hiya, Slack, are you all right?
That's right, she's back.
Ehhh, look busy!
No, but thank you all for your cards and messages,
it was much appreciated.
Now, is it safe to assume the great city of Leeds has become
a teeming crime-infested cesspit in my absence?
We need to all get back to work, so, go on, piss off.
Hey. You good?
Yeah.
Really? Yeah.
It's good to be back.
How is he?
Oh, he's OK, ta.
He gets pain and mobility problems,
and he's tired but he's all there so...we were lucky.
Good.
We need you back.
We stopped Wilco Wilson's cousin last week,
usual haul in his boot plus 26,000 pills.
Oh, he's diversifying then.
And Phil's making headway with Thomas Ajazi,
but it could do with your eyes on it. The murder.
Albanian lad? Shot in the old pub in Bramley?
Happened just before Owen got ill, yeah. I'll muck in.
Subtly. Don't emasculate him too much. I know it's tempting.
Oh, and how's about a nice little post office robbery in Gipton
to ease you back into the swing of things?
Come on, star pupil, grab your pencil case.
I knew you'd have run out.
You're all right, you, I don't care what they say.
You're back just in time.
It were getting embarrassing.
You're the only one who makes any arrests over street level.
Oh, that's nice.
Do you mind checking for polyps while you're there? Eh?
While your head's up my arse.
Quite nice to be going to the scene of a violent crime
rather than the hospital.
Look, I know you'll just take the piss, but I prayed for Owen.
Ta.
Took the best part of 12 grand.
All the foreign currency.
We were stocked up for Easter break. I reckon he knew about it.
And what did he look like?
THEY CONVERSE IN HINDI
He had a balaclava on.
But you could still see his dodgy teeth.
Dodgy, how?
SPEAKS HINDI
One gold one and the other one was chipped.
And, erm, what happened here?
Bastard pushed the gun right in there.
And the ambulance people said just to put some ice on it.
Can you ask your mum exactly how it happened?
Last time, we promise.
SPEAKS HINDI
She had her back to the shop but when she turned around,
he was there.
He already had this funny gun out,
and when she tried to say something he just shoved it in her face.
It looked antique.
SPEAKS HINDI
Like the Germans have in them old war films.
I didn't want to give it to him, but I thought he'd shoot me.
Are you OK? Yeah.
I've just got low, low blood sugar.
Please don't die.
Lou.
Lou, what you doing?
Lou, where are we going?
Lou!
Noel Wilkes. That's who knocked over the post office.
That's his dentistry she described.
He's one of Col McHugh's...
Wait, hang on, shouldn't firearms be doing this arrest?
DOG BARKS
Slack! You want to nick him, don't you?
Police!
He won't shoot me, not if he knows what's good for him.
BABY CRIES
Thanks for this. Just got her down.
Where's your son, Mrs Wilkes?
Don't know. Not here.
Check if you want.
Sorry about that.
PHONE BUZZES
Well, what now?
Crossgates.
There's a barbershop he hangs out at. Hop in.
Actually, change of plan. I've got to do something, so get out.
You what?
Just making a wee brew for these old dears. You want?
I'm OK.
I never thought I'd see you in a Portakabin. Don't.
I fucking hate coming down here,
and sometimes they try and get me in a bloody hard hat.
Seems you're back at work, then, eh?
Yeah. First day.
It was time.
Great. That's great.
Um, so, Belinda Wilkes runs two nail parlours for me in town.
Bulgey gets a call from her saying that you'd been round
trying to pinch our Noel.
I didn't even know you were back at work but even if you were,
why are you trying to pinch one of ours?
Did you give him that hot gun?
Aye. To get rid of.
Oh, well, he didn't.
He used it to knock over the post office in Gipton.
He what?
He's got the most recognisable set of gnashers in Leeds
and he wore a mask with a mouth hole.
Yeah.
I can't make this one go away, Col.
Everyone knows it's Noel,
so the smart move would be to give him up.
He's an idiot. Come on, you know that.
If you give him over to me, then we can make it work for us.
And how's that? Plausible deniability.
Makes sense for you to let me pin something on you every now and then.
Something we can point to if OCT get us an audit.
You want to be untouchable. You don't want to look untouchable.
You're absolutely right.
You know, he's fucked up royally, hasn't he? He's an eejit.
But here's my problem, he's a loyal eejit.
Trust me - he wouldn't know about you if he wasn't,
and loyalty is something that I always return.
But Col, he is going to get nicked eventually,
and if I handle it, we get a benefit.
But if it's at a stop and search
in Huddersfield in three months' time, then we don't.
I know.
All of that makes sense but the answer is "no."
So drop it.
We'll hide him away for a wee bit.
After that, if he gets pinched, he gets pinched, but not by you.
Hope Owen gets to come home soon.
And remember, anything you need.
Anything at all, day or night, OK. Promise?
Promise.
We not going to Crossgates?
Noel's going to be in a safehouse.
You up for an obs?
You went to see an informant.
Yeah, one I have to keep off the books.
We'll need a RIPA.
Don't need a RIPA to park up and have a coffee.
The gossip on Wilkes is that he's rising through the ranks.
Guess he's still just a scally at heart.
People don't change.
People change.
Just not in the way they want.
What does that look like to you?
Spare trackies,
mixed doner, and numpty's overnight bag.
Give yourself a chance, Noel.
Lou.
You've found him now, but we have to bring in firearms.
You know it.
Armed police!
Noel Wilkes! We know you're in there.
Get down on the floor with your hands behind your head!
GUNFIRE Shots fired! Shots fired!
I've got a hostage in here. You come in - I'll start blazin'!
Everybody all right? All good, all good.
The weapon's live. He's in the back room.
Says he's got a hostage. We need the negotiations team.
DC Okoye, you do the honours.
Get some more bodies down here for crowd control. I'll talk to Noel.
I'm B1 accredited on crisis mediation.
Plus, he knows me. Follow me, then.
Stay low.
Noel Wilkes? It's Detective Inspector Louisa Slack.
We've met a few times.
Well, don't tell me I'm that forgettable.
What are you doing here?
Can't really talk like this, lad.
You got someone in there with you?
Yeah, an hostage, so don't try anything!
I'm not a hostage, I'm his fucking cousin!
How about this for an idea, why don't you send her out,
I'll come in, and then we can chat properly?
Can't let you do that.
INAUDIBLE CONVERSATION INSIDE Shut up, man!
I'm DI Louisa Slack, the ranking officer on the scene.
I accept full responsibility for my operational decision
to exchange myself for the hostage, to prevent loss of life.
What'd you say, Noel?
You come in here first!
All right, I'm coming in. I'm wearing a shirt and a vest.
I'm not carrying anything, so it'd be dead decent if you could refrain
from shooting me.
That's it, love. Hands on your head.
Nice and slow, nice and slow.
You dickhead, Noel!
Hostage coming out.
This way, move.
What's going on, Slack?! You were supposed to get rid of that.
What are you doing, robbing the post office?
I needed cash, didn't I? If you need cash then you can just ask him.
No! I couldn't.
I was embarrassed. Look, Bulgey's already had a go at me all right.
RATTLING AT DOOR
DOG BARKS
It's me dog. She's good as gold, like.
I didn't want 'em shooting at her.
How are you going to get me out of this shit? I'm not.
I'm not your Fairy bloody Godmother.
You wore a ski mask that showed your mouth!
Fucking hell.
So, what now, then?! Shh-shh-shh.
What now?! You go down for it.
What? No, no, no, no, no.
No! Sod that. This is what you get paid for.
You shut up and you listen to me, Noel!
There is no way out, OK? So, be a good soldier.
No comment, head down, do your time.
Col will look after you and your mum.
Oh...
I've shot at the filth, man!
I'll be an old geezer, time I come out!
You might not even be 30 if you just keep your nose clean.
I'm sorry, lad, it has to go down this way.
Oh, God, man.
Is this what the boss wants?
You do right by him, he'll do right by you.
Oh, man!
EXHALES DEEPLY
He's a good guy, in't he?
He's the best.
Ah, ah, ah, no, no, no.
No, none of that.
Noel!
You'll have to take me dog.
I'll make sure she's looked after.
No, that means doggy prison.
She'll be in some tiny cell with some messed up staffies
barking at her all night. You have to take her. Promise me.
I'm really not into dogs.
Trust me, you'll be into Kiwi. Everybody loves her.
Kiwi?
Come here, girl. Come here. It's all right.
Sorry, I thought she'd be called Psycho or Beats or something.
Why Kiwi? Cos I love kiwis, don't I?
There's more vitamin C than an orange. You know that?
No...
All right, fine, I'll take her. I promise. OK?
DOG WHIMPERS
Go on. Go on, Kiwi, in there.
Go on, darling.
It's OK, it's all right, it's all right.
DOG WHINES SOFTLY
Why'd you have to mess up the old lady's face?
She's black and blue.
She was looking at me all witchy like. It shit me up.
Did you shoot Thomas Ajazi? Who?
That lad in the old pub in Bramley.
No. I don't know who did that.
It was this gun, Noel.
I swear! I was in Manchester doing a job for the boss.
But Bulge gave me the strap and told me to chuck it.
Why you asking this anyway?
Kneel down.
All clear!
Put your hands on your head! Do it now!
SHOUTS: Do it now! Both hands on your head.
Right, give me your hand.
DI Slack? I can take that now.
Just relax.
Got it. On your feet.
Kiwi!
DOG BARKS
Kiwi!
Good girl.
That's a dog. Maybe you should've been a detective.
Oh, it's there.
Whose is it? It's ours.
OK. Whose was it?
One of Col's lads.
I made a promise, so I...
You all right?
Yeah...
I was thinking maybe later we could get a takeaway
before the hospital. Maybe a Thai?
Yeah, bit formal, but.
Here! Here! What's this?
Hello.
What's her name? Kiwi.
Kiwi?
DOG BARKS
Is it a midlife crisis?
Is it an episode of undiagnosed mania?
You hate dogs.
Do you get this, Dad? I'm saying nothing.
I've got this horrible feeling you got her for me.
These are getting much better.
I'll never get back to where I were.
You don't know that.
570, it's an actual crime.
I could knock up a stairgate thing.
You know, like we had when Owen was little?
The dog can have the run of downstairs. Won't take long.
Yeah.
What the fuck's he doing here?
Go home, Cer. I'll deal with this.
Deal with what? Tell me what's going on.
Now. It's nothing. It's just routine. It's fine.
I know that's not true. What is it?
I just...I...
Just what? I don't know, Cer.
Something's changed... What's changed?
I don't know.
I've got to go. I'll see you at home.
What's changed? Feed Kiwi.
You don't have to go with him!
On you go.
Stop there.
BANGS AT DOOR
You OK?
Good.
All right? Mm-hm.
Sorry, I've got shit on you. Come have a sit.
You ever been to this place? No.
It's the best kept secret in Leeds.
Asked them to bring a bit of all their best stuff.
And I've got a nice Rioja decanted for you, too.
Unless you've already eaten? No. I'm famished. Good.
Thank you.
How's Ceri? Yeah, he's good.
He's got a lot on.
Listen, erm, about Owen.
I know the NHS do their best, of course they do.
But this place, world beater.
Money's no object, OK?
Just want to do something for him, Lou - for Owen.
I know I haven't seen him since he was a wee dot, but...
You know.
Thank you.
You don't have to thank me. We're partners, aren't we?
You could've got anyone to deliver those.
What's on your mind?
Your mind is on my mind.
Noel? Mm-hm.
OK. OCT got an anonymous tip.
It didn't come through me, so I couldn't kill it.
Best I could do was to get ahead of it,
and make sure that Noel didn't get himself shot,
and then I reminded him that you'd be there for him.
Who the fuck do you think I am?
It's just that you come to me wanting to take him and I say "no."
And then the very same night, I find out that you've nicked him,
at a safehouse that only you and five other people know about.
Six others.
He had his cousin with him.
She brought supplies, they got stoned, she slept over.
So, obviously, he told her the address,
and she told...well, who knows?
So, the mouth hole wasn't even the stupidest thing he's done this week.
Fucking eejit.
Well, it looks like you've turned it into a benefit for us
which is good.
But, um, this can never happen again, Lou, OK?
Ever.
You promise me that?
No.