(tense music playing)
-Chefs, table 38, two people! -(chefs respond)
Table 23, four people.
(chefs respond)
-Broken sauce, Chef. Need a new one. -Yes, Chef.
CARMY: Fire 31, 25! Two out on 31, Chefs!
(chefs respond)
-Still not there. Again, Chef. -Yes, Chef.
Thank you, Chef.
-Wait on 31, Chefs! -(chefs respond)
♪ ♪
-Why? -Chef,
-I'm sorry. It got too hot-- -Why?
-It didn't cool down-- -Why?
-Well, it was my fault-- -Go.
-Fine. -CARMY: Fire 19, Chefs!
-(chefs respond) -Hold on 17, Chefs!
-(chefs respond) -Why do you hire fucking idiots?
Do you like working with fucking idiots?
-I'll do better. -Say "yes, Chef."
-Yes, Chef. -Can you not handle this?
-Is it too much for you? Answer me. -I can handle it.
-I can handle it, Chef. -I can handle it, Chef.
-12! 10! 36! Don't fuck with my count! -Fire 8, 13, 36!
-3! 52! 14! -Sorry, Chefs! 8, 13, 29!
Why are you serving broken sauces? Why? I get it.
You have a short man's complex.
You can barely reach over this fucking table, right?
Is this why you have the tattoos and your cool little scars,
and you go out you take your smoke breaks?
It's fun, isn't it? But, here's the thing.
You're terrible at this. You're no good at it.
Go faster, motherfucker. Keep going faster.
Why are you so slow? Why are you so fucking slow?
Why? You think you're so tough.
Yeah. Why don't you say this? Say "yes, Chef, I'm so tough."
-Yes, Chef. I'm so tough. -Say "fucking yes, Chef. I'm so tough."
-Yes, Chef. I'm so tough. -You are not tough.
You are bullshit. You are talentless.
-Say fucking hands. -Hands!
(puts down spoon)
(whispers) You should be dead.
♪ ♪
-CARMY: Hands! -(chefs respond)
-(phone ringing) -WOMAN 1: ...the sandwich.
You giving that to the homeless guy?
-(ringing) -Hands! Somebody fucking answer me!
-(bell rings) -RICHIE: Get that sandwich...
-CARMY: Hands! -(phone rings)
Fucking Christ! Hands! Please! Please!
(chattering, laughter)
Yeah! Thank you! Thank you, Chef!
-RICHIE: Now what, I put this in the trash? -(laughter)
Chef, do you want me to strain that oil for you?
No, no, I got it. Thank you, Chef.
Why am I using a toothbrush, Chef?
CARMY: It's about consistency and being consistent.
We can't operate at a higher level
-without consistency. -RICHIE: I like this level.
-TINA: Me, too. -Yeah, well, at the French Laundry,
-you know how much time-- -Well, go fuck your French Laundry.
Stupid fucking name.
-Alright, then at Noma-- -Oh, and fuck your Noma, too!
-TINA: System, baby. -MARCUS: Noma's the shit, huh?
The best. Teach you to operate at a level
you didn't even know you could operate at, Marcus.
And, just so we're clear, I wanted to work here.
-Mike wouldn't let me. -RICHIE: No, no, no.
You went halfway around the world
to learn all this fancy, useless fucking bullshit.
I went to West Lawrence Avenue and learned every lesson.
-West Lawrence? You talking about DeVry? -RICHIE: Yeah, exactly!
Oh, DeVry. We're serious about success.
-Oh, is that-- You supposed to be fucking funny, fucko? -(laughter)
Yeah? Let me tell you something. No,
for real! Where else are you gonna learn
crucial database management specialization skills
while troubleshooting a vented Optispark distributor
-in a TransAm? -I would never need to learn that.
Definitely not Noma!
I would legit do anything to go to Noma.
And eat bugs?
-And be inspired, stupid. -RICHIE: Oh god,
-and be lame. -The ice cream machine is broken!
-RICHIE: Shit. -DeVry teach you to fix that?
-(mocking laughter) -RICHIE: You know what?
Actually, yes.
-Go fuck yourself. -You graduated?
Fuck no.
Does anyone ever order the ice cream?
-I forgot we had ice cream. -Hm.
♪ ♪
(punch)
(sighs)
♪ ♪
(distant siren)
♪ ♪
NARRATOR: (on TV) ...every time in the same direction.
Maria forms the dough,
picking up all the flour, so her board is clean.
She then kneads it, until it is smooth.
The dough should rest for at least 30 minutes.
Maria roughly chops two cloves of garlic
(audio slows) ...and two sage leaves.
(slows further, fades out) She wraps this up in muslin...
Fire! Table 16!
-(receipts printing) -17! Table 23! Order!
-(talking in reverse) -Go faster, motherfucker.
-(reverse talking continues) -Why are you so slow?
Why are you so fucking slow?
Take a break, sweetheart.
(cacophony of voices, noise)
(fire alarm blaring)
(distorted music, voices)
(fire alarm blaring)
Fuck!
(fire alarm beeping)
(TV playing, indistinct)
(fire alarm blaring)
("Ajai Finale" by Serengeti) ♪ Yeah, check it, but I should be good ♪
♪ I see the Benetton green, they been gone for a minute ♪
♪ This collab is a dream ♪
♪ Grey Poupon had a thing, eating meals in a car ♪
♪ It made you feel a certain way when you held that jar ♪
♪ That's what I can achieve, I feel the same about drops ♪
♪ I feel a bit rare in the shoes and the watch ♪
♪ Or those Preston socks... ♪
-SYDNEY: Hey, you got time? -Hey. Always. What's up?
Uh, I-I just wanted to say thanks for this past week.
It's been a really great opportunity. Uh,
but I wanna do more. I wan--
-I know. You want more to do. -More to do, yeah.
And I wanna get paid.
-You get paid. -I get paid to stage.
I wanna get paid to work here.
I feel like I've been... working here.
I-I did do some extra credit though.
It's um... Lot of words.
Yeah, but th-they basically say
we're getting killed on labor.
We're open from 11:00 to 9:00. That's dumb.
We should be open from 11:00 to 2:00 for lunch
-and 5:00 to 9:00 for dinner. -Mm-hmm.
Not to mention you're spending money
on pretty high-end stuff.
-Farmers market produce-- -Is my hair on fire?
Uh, not yet, no, but you need help, and...
you do this, I mean,
these savings, 20% of them could cover my yearly salary.
That's not even accounting for other people's, you know?
Plus, we're sleeping on to-go's.
-That's business just sitting right... -Yeah. No, no, no.
We don't have the support system or organization
for a food-to-go business. We need to figure out pack--
Packaging, right. On page 27, randomly, um,
th-there's actually some... a pretty good layout
-of just that. -Page 27?
Yeah, it's... mostly graphics.
-RICHIE: Yo, Carm! -(shuts binder)
-Listen... -Yo.
Yo. I can handle this myself, cousin. I got this.
So...
You're not Ron.
Ron's gone. Gone gone.
-Ron's dead? -CARMY: Who is Ron?
My partner, Ron Pager.
He passed away. I'm running his routes now.
Nancy Chore, Chicago Board of Health.
I'm here to inspect the property.
Okay, Nancy, hi. I'm Carmen Berzatto.
-I'm the owner. -He's the owner's brother, actually.
He's also dead.
He doesn't look dead.
No, no, I'm not dead. My brother's dead.
-I'm very sorry to hear that. -CARMY: Thank you.
Yeah, I'm sorry for your loss, too.
Can I, uh, see some kind of identification?
(scoffs) Yeah.
Interesting.
Is it? It's interesting. What's interesting about that?
-It's an interesting... logo on the badge. -Nancy,
you need anything, just find us.
-Make yourself at home. Okay? Thank you. Thank you. -RICHIE: Thank you.
Where's Tina and Ebra?!
-(door shuts) -No funny business, Ms. Chore.
-You, too. -Okay. (laughs)
I also noted on the COG
that, uh, it's not necessarily flour
that's expensive but the shipping.
So, we could just have somebody go and pick it up.
Yeah, Marcus.
Okay, sure. Marcus. Great.
No, it can only be Marcus.
Why can it only be Marcus?
Sweeps, Tina, and Ebra don't drive.
Uh, well, what about Richie?
Suspended license.
I-I saw him drive in this morning.
I'm telling you, beware of bitches with little notebooks.
Sydney walked in here a couple of days ago,
and now she running shit just like that?
All fucking willowy and scribbling.
(imitating) "Chef, I would do anything to work at Noma."
Bitch, look around. This ain't Noma.
The health inspector is coming in here.
She's not nice. She's not your friend. She may smile.
Don't-- See the teeth? Those are daggers.
-The point is it's one of a hundred things we can do... -Sydney.
-...to save costs and-- -Sydney, Sydney, Sydney, Sydney!
Look, I'm sure this is all correct, okay? But, it's a lot.
The job you're describing goes way outside
what I can afford to pay a sous,
which I can barely afford already.
But, I-I hear you, okay?
I have every intention of turning this into an efficient,
respectable place of business run by adults.
-RICHIE: Oh my god. That's some fucking ass shit! -Eventually.
♪ ♪
(drops binder)
Does anybody know how dangerous this is?
-Yo! Yo! What's going on? -Nah, just-- It wasn't dangerous...
-CARMY: What's dangerous? -...Ms. Chore, until you pulled it out.
NANCY: I discovered a large hole in the tile.
Looks like a former gas line next to the stovetops.
Not only was it not properly dry-walled and caulked,
but someone clogged the hole with napkins
-and then proxied over it with some kind of plastic. -RICHIE: Don't look at me.
Grease seeped into the napkins and the proxy became unproxied.
-What does that mean? -A potential cross-contaminate.
Additionally, no hot water in the hand station.
-Wait, that hot water actua-- -RICHIE: Okay, that one, you know, Ms. Chore,
I told Chicago Ron this a hundred times.
-You just gotta wait a minute... -You're gonna talk over me? And take longer?
-...so you can relax on that one. So, relax. -Cool. Good.
Health code states any sink near a prep area
needs to deliver instantly hot water
-to prevent the spread of bacteria. -RICHIE: Yeah--
I haven't even delivered the big one yet.
-There's a big one. -CARMY: W-what is the big one?
Someone left a pack of cigarettes
on the stovetop near the burners.
-(nervous laugh) -Not only very dangerous,
but also a potential contaminant.
-Motherfucker. -You can say that again.
-Motherfucker! -Don't actually say it again, you fucking idiot!
You're about to get fuckin' power-washed, cousin!
Unfortunately! These violations leave me no choice.
-I award you a C. -RICHIE: No! No, no, no!
-Wait, no, no, no! -That's some hood shit.
(overlapping shouting)
You know what? I'm gonna caulk that shit right now.
Oh, oh, oh, it doesn't matter how fast you do it.
I can't come back to test for 30 days.
What! It'll take five-- No, no, no! Don't touch that.
It will take five seconds to caulk!
-I can caulk! Let me fucking caulk! -CARMY: Richie!
-FAK: Richie, there's no caulk in-house, dude. -Shut the fuck up, Fak!
-NANCY: See you all later. -(Fak mumbling)
-RICHIE: Shut the fuck up! -FAK: Yeah, but I'm saying there's no caulk in the house.
Dude, it's okay. We'll fix it.
Bitch at me? You wanna run this place, you fucking slob?
RICHIE: How do you know they're not your cigarettes?
(all shouting)
Put it in the fucking window!
You put it in the fucking window!
Stop! Stop! Let's not do this.
-That's your C. -Alright! Here's what we're gonna do.
You're gonna go to the hardware store,
you're gonna get some joint compound,
you're gonna get some caulk,
and you're gonna caulk that shit.
-Okay, well, uh, FYI, I'm not your fucking gopher. -CARMY: FYI?
CARMY: FYI? FYI?
You cocked it up, you're gonna caulk it out.
Well, I would love to, but, uh, my license is expired, FYI.
You drove in this morning...
Sydney, you wanna help? You can take him.
-(laughs) No. Time out. I'll Uber. Thank you. -SYDNEY: Grow up.
Surge rates, fucko.
Fine. But I'm taking my car.
I... I don't care.
He's that broke that took him out?
-FAK: I graduated with a C. -TINA: We know.
VIDEO GAME: Ballbreaker...
(glitching) er... er... er... er...
Fak, fix that fucking sound.
Fix that fucking sound. Please fix that fucking sound!
-I will fix it. Fak always fixes it. -(glitching continues)
The kids come in, they break it, what happens?
I fix the Balls. Fak always fixes the Balls.
-CARMY: Fix it! -FAK: I'll fix the Balls!
RICHIE: Such fucking bullshit.
(keys jingling)
Can you, um, can you hold this?
("Have You Seen Me Lately" by Counting Crows on radio)
♪ Never look back ♪
(gear shift clunking)
-You got... You gotta wiggle it. -Oh.
Okay. I should've known that I had to wiggle it.
Th-that's on me. That's me that I don't wiggle it.
I wasn't expecting company, by the way.
These Arby's cups are from different visits.
I respect that.
♪ Have you seen me lately? ♪
♪ I... ♪
♪ Was out on the radio, starting to change ♪
♪ Somewhere out in America ♪
♪ It's raining... ♪
(knocking)
(song fades out)
Shit...
Where is this shit?
-We can always talk to somebody who works here... -No, no, no.
I can find this myself.
Can't believe I'm taking orders from a fucking toddler
right now. You know,
my entire life, I had to listen to everybody
acting all worried about him all the time. "He's a baby.
Don't get Carmine into trouble." You know?
I was a baby too once, Sydney. Nobody gave a fuck.
Okay, um, I'm sorry about that,
but none of that, like,
messed up the wall that we're here to fix, so...
Fuck that. He's giving me crap
about not letting him work
at the restaurant when he was a kid?
You think I give a fuck where that dude works?
It was fuckin' Mikey.
Wait, why didn't Michael want him to work at the restaurant?
Because he's a little bitch, probably.
Can I ask, like, what...
What was, like, the deal with Michael?
Uh, he shot himself in the head four months ago.
-Jesus. Uh... -(cash register beeping)
W-were you guys, like,
related on your mom's side
or like your dad's or--
Neither. He was my best friend.
Boom! (claps) There's that shit. Told you.
Silicone, adhesive caulk,
acrylic caulk--
Are you just reading what's on the labels?
Okay, we got rubber sealant--
-I'm gonna find somebody who works here. -No!
I got this.
And then, you know, the, uh, the produce bill is due.
You know, and the power comes in,
and, uh, I-I can't build enough of a parachute.
You know, even if we got this place packed,
that's only, like, a week of survival cash.
It's exhausting listening to this.
-You asked me what's going on. -I asked you where you been.
Yeah, you're looking at it. This is where I been.
Carm, this place is bullshit.
Alright? I mean, you're never gonna fix it.
Y-you can't start at fucked.
You understand that, right?
-Is that really a question? -You're operating a business
historically has a lower success rate than...
I don't know, Chicago fucking Bears.
You know, you're having a hard time
keeping your vendors current, your crew paid.
Alright? And we're not even getting into
the money I lent your brother.
-I didn't know Michael took money from you -He took a lot of money from me.
I mean, cash infusions for this place,
you know, term loans, which he never paid back.
Now, I gotta hold you responsible.
Okay.
How, uh, h-how much? (clears throat)
300 grand.
Jesus Christ, Jimmy.
Jesus Christ is right, Carm.
And it's not like he put it into this place.
Still looks like some kid painted it with his ass.
Look... (sighs)
No disrespect, you know, your brother,
he was an animal, you know, surrounded by dickheads,
and then he lost his mind, and now
he put you in a real tough spot.
That's why you stopped by?
I stopped by to see you.
Shoulda stopped by to break your legs,
but, you know, I guess I'm becoming forgetful.
Why'd you give him the money?
Very good question.
You know, I, uh...
I don't know. He said he was gonna franchise the place,
but you knew that was bullshit.
You still gave it to him.
I loved him, too.
Look...
Let's just do the easy thing here,
and you sell it to me.
No.
No, you just said restaurants are bad for business.
Who says I'm gonna keep it a restaurant?
(sniffs) I'll get you the money, Jimmy.
Alright? I promise you.
Oh, shit. We're gonna be in gridlock for over an hour
-'cause of your new best friend. -Okay, well--
I don't even know why you wanna work for that little stunad.
-Because he's good. -(sighs) Oh my god...
Like, whether you like it or not, he's incredibly talented,
and we could all learn a lot from him.
-You know he was one of Food & Wine's Best New Chefs -Oh, we could...
-when he was 21? -Oh my god!
(mocking) He was one of Food & Wine's Best New Chefs?
Is that what you just told me? That changes everything!
Really good short-term memory, Richie. Congrats on that.
You know the restaurant could be good.
Like, I know you know that.
Like, it doesn't have to be a place where the food is shitty
or everybody acts shitty and feels shitty.
-Like, it could be a good legit spot. -Okay, you know what, Sydney?
You're getting a little aggressive,
and I think maybe you should just pause
-and take a breath before you start driving. -Okay.
-Man or woman, I'm not discriminating. -(phone buzzing)
It's dangerous to get behind the wheel when you're hysterical.
The fuck does she keep calling me?
-Hey, why do you keep calling me? -Fuck me...
What's going on with her?
Is she crying again?
(sighs) What'd you say?
Well...
I'd be crying, too. She's at this different school,
and those kids are a bunch of fuckfaces.
Hold on...
Hold on.
Can I just talk to her, please?
Hey, sweetie.
How you doing? You not doing so good?
What's wrong?
Oh, you're scared?
Uh, w-what are you scared about?
Yeah.
I get it.
But, you know what?
You're gonna do great.
I promise.
And if you don't, I'm gonna give you $500.
But you're gonna do great.
And I'm gonna see you on Friday, right?
Of... How can you...
Of course, I still love you.
I love you so, so much.
I love you more and more every day, if that's possible.
I just...
No. I don't need to talk to Mommy.
But, uh, call me after,
you know, let me know how it went.
Okay.
I'm so proud of you, kiddo.
I love you.
Sorry. My, uh, ahem,
my daughter's going through a phase.
Uh, yeah. Uh...
Uh, h-how old is she?
Uh, she's 5.
Like Carmy.
Food & Wine's Best New Dickhead.
(sniffs)
(clears throat)
Fuck.
I fucked up with those cigarettes.
(heavy exhale)
I'm sorry, uh, about Michael.
And I got the wrong caulk, I think.
You did.
-But... -(bag crinkling)
I didn't.
("St. Dominic's Preview" by Van Morrison)
Oh, shit.
-Syd making moves. (laughs) -Fuck off, Richie.
(applause in song)
♪ Shammy cleaning all the windows ♪
♪ Singing songs about Edith Piaf's soul ♪
♪ And I hear blue strains of no regret ♪
♪ Across the street from Cathedral Notre Dame ♪
(phone buzzing)
♪ Meanwhile, back in San Francisco... ♪
Carm?
-Hey, Pete. -Pete (on phone): Hey. Uh...
Everything okay?
Yeah. No, I'm good. I just, um...
Sugar wasn't picking up her phone.
Oh.
Look, I was just, um--
Uh, h-hold on. Why-- Lemme get Nat.
I-- No, I just-- I-I-I'm sorry. I, uh...
-Nat! -I wanted to talk to you about something. I, uh, I just...
I wanted to apologize.
-Oh. -Uh, for last time.
No, you know what? I went to Urgent Care,
and they gave me some stuff to put on it, and, uh...
No, I-I shouldn't--
Hey, Nat! Just hold on. Let me grab her.
-Oh, uh, okay. -Let me grab her, one second. No problem! No problem.
(laughs)
-Sugar: What is going on? -It's Carmy.
-Why's he calling you? -I don't know.
-You calling Pete? -Carmy: You weren't picking up the phone.
I'm making dinner.
Did you hear I apologized?
(sighs) So?
-CARMY: Cicero was here. -Yeah, I heard.
I also heard there's a C in the window? Nice.
Listen, Sugar...
I woke up in the middle of the night
cooking a bunch of wrapped frozen shit.
I almost set my apartment on fire.
Does that happen a lot?
Carmy: Sometimes.
(sighs) Did you look at the thing?
No, I didn't look at the thing.
Sugar: Pete and I have been going lately,
and it's actually been really nice.
Yeah, of course Pete would go.
Oh, shut the fuck up.
PETE: You want me to shut the fuck up?
No, not you, sweetie. Y-you didn't say anything.
PETE: Oh. Copy that.
What are you making?
SUGAR: (sighs) Mom's chicken.
Look, I'm, uh, (sighs) I'm fine.
Really. You know, I just have trouble breathing sometimes,
-and I wake up screaming. -SUGAR: What?
CARMY: I-I know tons of people that cry out of nowhere.
Okay. I just sent it to you again.
Like, I don't wanna bother you, okay? Uh--
No, you're not bothering me, but that isn't, like, un-scary.
When did the breathing problem start?
I think maybe sometime in New York.
I was throwing up every day before work.
Oh. Okay. Well, that sounds chill.
-CARMY: I kind of dug it. -You dug throwing up?
No. No, no, it was awful.
Uh, chef was a piece of shit.
SUGAR: Then why'd you stay there?
(sighs)
I don't know. Um...
People loved the food.
It felt good.
Chefs always say a big part of the job
is taking care of people, right?
CARMY: Yeah. Yeah. No, I guess.
Okay, well, you can't really do that
if you're not taking care of yourself then.
And I like when you tell me things. Just...
-I'm asking you to look at the thing. -Mm-hmm.
It's okay to ask for help.
(Carmy sighs)
I understand. I do.
Okay.
♪ ♪
♪ And we're over in a 52nd Street apartment ♪
♪ Socializing with the wino few ♪
Oh, f...
-Ass! -(pencil clatters)
(drops caulking gun)
♪ But they're flying too high to see my ♪
♪ See my point of view ♪
♪ As we gaze out on ♪
♪ Saint Dominic's preview ♪
♪ Hey, Saint Dominic's preview ♪
-(knocks) -Yo. Need you up front.
Uh, y-y-yeah, yeah, yeah.
I-I'll be right there.
♪ Saint Dominic's preview ♪
♪ See them freedom marching ♪
♪ Saint Dominic's preview ♪
♪ Freedom marching ♪
♪ Out on the street, freedom marching ♪
♪ Out on the street ♪
♪ Turn around and come back ♪
♪ Look at the man ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ St. Dominic's Preview ♪
♪ One more time ♪
♪ St. Dominic's Preview ♪
-(crowd cheering) -VAN MORRISON: Thank you very much.
(fades out)
♪ ♪ (rock music playing)
SYDNEY: Chef, let's fire two chicken peppers,
-two sausage pepper, two mortadell. -EBRAHEIM: Two chicken pepper,
two sausage pepper, two mortadell, Chef!
-SYDNEY: Thank you, Chef. -EBRAHEIM: Yes, Chef.
SYDNEY: Fire, one with sausage pepper, one with mortadell!
One sausage pepper, one more mortadell, Chef!
-Thank you, Chef. -SYDNEY: Okay, let's fire one more sausage pepper,
-two more mortadell! -Behind.
EBRAHEIM: One more sausage pepper, one more mortadell, Chef!
-Two more mortadell. -EBRAHEIM: Two more mortadell, Chef!
SYDNEY: Gorgeous. Thank you, Chef.
-You want a line change? -No. No, stay. I'll tournant.
-Thank you for taking Richie today. -Oh yeah, no sweat.
-(receipt prints) -Do you want me to, uh, come in tomorrow?
-Please. You're hired. -Yeah?
Yes. Your pass, Chef.
Thank you, Chef.
Uh, can I get hands, please?
And fire one more sausage pepper!
-EBRAHEIM: One more sausage pepper, Chef! -SYDNEY: Thank you, Chef.
♪ ♪
Yo. Fix that hole?
Yeah. Yeah. Is the Health Department coming back?
Yeah. Yeah, I think so.
-Fuckin' Cicero. -Cicero.
-We all good in there? -Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. I'm just gonna burn one. I haven't had one all day.
-I'll see you in a sec, alright? -Alright.
(sighs)
-(L rumbling) -(music playing on radio)
(indistinct rapping)
Fuck.
(sighs)
(siren wailing)
("Have You Seen Me Lately" by Counting Crowd)
♪ Get away from me ♪
♪ Just get away from me ♪
♪ This isn't gonna be easy ♪
♪ But I don't need you ♪
♪ Believe me ♪
♪ Yeah, you got a piece of me ♪
♪ But it's just a little piece of me ♪
♪ And I don't need anyone ♪
♪ And these days ♪
♪ I feel like I'm fading away ♪
♪ Like sometimes ♪
♪ When I hear myself on the radio... ♪