[smooching]
[indistinct chatter]
Thanks so much for the promotion.
You earned it.
And the warm welcome. I feel so special.
Oh, all the new executives get this kind of welcome.
What? Even Jeffrey from Web Services?
My hat is a 5G mess.
Oh, yeah. I love that guy.
-[chuckles] -[horn blowing]
[Steve] Ah, the start of a new corporate work day.
Here comes marketing,
and there's the logistics department.
Here are the majorettes.
[fanfare]
Where the hell is catering, though?
-Oh? -They should be passing out
the breakfast burritos.
[Steve] Oh. There they are.
[Annie] Oh, yum. I love that they're gluten free.
Oh, you know what would be exciting?
A smoothie with peaches.
That's not on the current menu,
but I think I can make that happen.
Oh, really?
Wow, you really are the leader in tech.
I think you mean big tech, Annie from Accounts.
You know, as part of your welcome package,
we'll be taking a trip this weekend,
a river cruise on my personal yacht.
I can't wait to share all the new analysis with you.
Oh, right. Well, this is meant to be
more of a break from work, if you know what I mean.
Right, but did you look at the most recent numbers?
-They're down. -Eh!
Maybe you're just afraid to admit that
the company is underperforming.
-Maybe. -So, where are we going, anyway?
-The Nile. -The River Nile?
That's so weird. I just noticed a discrepancy
in the Drone Department books.
We deny any allegations of a package being lost.
Lost package? Who said anything about a--
I've never lost a package, ever!
O-kay, but that's-- Oh-oh! Oh...
Ever! If anyone told you that,
tell me who they are and I'll have them fired.
[chuckles] Okay. Will do.
Wow. You know, I could really see myself succeeding here.
I'd love to make some changes,
create a women's advocacy group,
maybe a crisis hotline.
Yeah, life is pretty perfect the way it is
at the executive level.
Oh. [laughs]
[woman] Hey! New on the menu,
smoothies with peaches.
[man] Steve is a genius.
[buzzer rings]
Oh! [crying]
So, I have to tell you every time I'm going to the bathroom?
-But I'm your supervisor. -Do I?
-What's going on here? -She's trying to dock my pay.
-For what? -Going to the bathroom.
Why don't you just piss in your pants?
-Like I do. -What?!
I wear a diaper. It's great.
-Agh! -You wear a fucking diaper?
Mm-hm. It just makes things easier.
Oh, hey, look. [humming]
Hey, hos. Did you hear about Annie from Accounts?
She got promoted.
Wow. Imagine that.
I wonder if she wears a diaper.
Huh. No one from the warehouse ever gets promoted.
Speak for yourself. If Annie from Accounts
can get promoted, so can I.
You're gonna get in trouble for stealing those.
Who cares. Fuck the warehouse.
Tell me about it.
Do you know how much I walked today
to find these packages?
Think I've pulled 12 miles.
I walked almost a whole marathon today.
And I don't even get the braggy bumper sticker.
Hey, did either of you guys
get asked to donate a lung to the company?
Sure is shit down here in the warehouse.
[woman] Hey, no smoking, warehouse friends!
[mocking] No smoking, warehouse friends.
This bitch.
Boy. It sure is funny that we have to live here, too.
Well, who do you think we are, executives?
We can't afford to live anywhere else.
If you get promoted to executive,
I hear you get fresh breakfast burritos
-every morning. -Bullshit!
And you get to go on a river cruise with the CEO.
Oh, you mean Steve himself?
Yeah. That's where Annie from Accounts is going this weekend.
He takes every new executive. It's some kind of tradition.
-Where are they going? -On a river cruise this time.
Yeah, but which river?
The Nile.
I sure could use a fancy vacation like that.
They probably use toilets, too.
Dead Man Thompson always talked about the Nile.
Dead Man Thompson doesn't know anything.
He's crazy.
Also, he's dead.
Well, before he died,
he told me a story about a package
that went missing there.
Where were you today, Dorothy?
I was missing you.
I told you guys, I was dealing with my medical issue.
-Ugh! -Huh. Tell me about it.
-Oh, right. Of course. -[woman] Hey! Lights out!
Man, warehouse life sucks.
-Ugh! -Goodnight, Dorothy.
[sighs] Goodnight, Rose.
-[buzzing] -[woman] Rose, Deborah, work!
I've been thinking about our conversation last night.
This really isn't fair.
We deserve better working conditions.
Oh, yeah? Well, what are we gonna do about it?
I think we should tell Steve our demands for the warehouse.
Let's crash that river cruise.
-Okay. -Ugh.
Crash the river cruise?
How the hell are we gonna get out?
Hey, uh, do you guys think Dorothy likes me?
[Dorothy] Now, just pull this pane of glass out like so,
and take the bars and just slide them right out.
Wow. How did you even think of this, Dorothy?
I grew up in a house with windows.
I hope to have a house with windows some day.
Wow. This really feels like we're escaping.
Uh, we are escaping, Rose.
-[alarm blaring] -Shit. That's the alarm.
Come on, girls. We have to run for it.
[Steve on PA] Hello, warehouse friends.
Here is a gentle reminder...
Just realized we're on the ground floor.
...return to your rooms.
It is past our 9 p.m. curfew.
Hello, warehouse friends.
Here is a gentle reminder
that you should return to your rooms.
It is past our 9 p.m. curfew.
Hello, warehouse friends.
Here is a gentle reminder
that you should return to your rooms.
Ow!
[grunting]
[Dorothy] Okay, girls. Now, just to get through
-this small orchard. -[Sophia] I didn't realize
there was an orchard on property.
[Deborah] This is where all the fruit comes from
for the executive smoothie bar.
[Rose] Ah. I love smoothies.
[Deborah] Jesus Christ, Rose, everyone loves smoothies.
[car starts]
By the way, where'd you get this car?
-It's crazy. -Yeah, where'd you get it.
The executive lot. So sue me.
Has anyone seen my car? I can't seem to find it.
[crowd exclaims]
Maybe I'll get myself an electric scooter.
What's gonna happen to us if we get caught?
-[Sophia] Cut it, I say! -[Rose] Oh, God.
Remember when Dead Man Thompson died?
They just made us keep working around him.
Yeah, that was fucked up.
That's why we have to change
the working conditions for everyone.
[Annie] Wow, this yacht is so... spacious.
[Steve] I know, it's a lot more boat than I needed,
but I figured, why not splurge a little.
Just wait 'til you see below the deck.
[Annie] Now that we're alone,
I really want to talk to you about
some of the research I've been doing.
I think we can increase the optimization
of our mobile site by using the metadata
we gathered last quarter.
It's true.
Uh, yeah, what's metadata again?
[Annie] Well, metadata is basically
a set of data that gives information
about other data.
Oh, right, like meta. Like, that's so meta.
-Right, but for data. -Right, yeah.
Okay, here's what we're gonna say.
We want better pay, the ability to unionize--
Health benefits for part time employees.
Oh, and do not forget the breakfast burritos.
Good one, Rose. I won't forget those.
Look! Here they come.
[Annie] Well, I can just summarize this all for you
in an e-mail, I guess. That you'll never read.
Hey, look over there.
Come over here. Cut your motor.
Cut it, I said!
I'm a boat man.
What's your problem, girls?
Steve, I'm frightened. What do they want?
We're from the warehouse, and we've got a few demands.
Now, wait a minute. What do you think this is?
I'm a boat man.
-[gunshot] -Ah!
[Steve] Hey, you just shot my boat man.
[Dorothy] What the hell are you doing?
-You just shot his boat man. -Hey! Ow, ow, ow!
[Dorothy] What the hell's wrong with you?
[Deborah] I'm just really fuckin' amped up, okay?
-We said no guns, Deborah. -I never agreed to that!
Hey, now, what's this all about, warehouse friends?
Shut up! And you, with your bullshit promotion.
You don't deserve to be an executive
-any more than I do. -This is ridiculous.
-Get down. -Oh!
Sorry about that. We didn't totally
plan on shooting anyone.
Oh, jeez. God, my knee got scraped and everything hurts.
Steve, we've gotta get out of here.
These warehouse friends are angry and violent.
That's not true. We're actually very calm.
Should we give him our demands now, Dorothy?
Well, I guess I'd say they're more concerns than demands.
-Ah! -[grunting]
Oh, now they're concerns, are they?
I thought you wanted to come out here and get something done!
-Jesus! -What the hell
did we come out here for?
[Dorothy] God, get off of me, Deborah!
Ooh! Ow! God! My medical issue!
Whoa, Deborah, calm down.
Oh, God, that really spooked me.
What's going on?
She's pussyfooting around everything.
Now that she's faced with the boss, she's scared.
-Is that true? -Listen,
if we want him to take us seriously,
we have to be cool about it.
He has to see that we can play ball. Get it?
No! I don't get why we don't just kill him.
Come on, Deborah, that's crazy.
Let's let Dorothy take the lead on this.
Okay, fine, but give me back my gun.
Well, fine, but you can't kill anyone else.
-I can't promise anything. -Deborah!
[sobbing] I hate it here.
Oh, jeez. Somebody call the "wambulance." Am I right?
Hey, now, what's this all about, warehouse friends?
Conditions at the warehouse are terrible.
Every move we make is recorded,
and we don't have the freedom to even use the bathroom
-when we need to. -Seriously? Wow.
That sounds... terrible.
It is terrible. It's inhumane.
And we also want our share of breakfast burritos.
Wait a second. You're telling me
you don't get breakfast burritos in the warehouse?
-No. -Well, jeez,
I guess we only have a certain amount of breakfast burritos--
[grunts] to give out, and if the warehouse got them,
there wouldn't be enough for the executives.
I mean, there are the huevos rancheros,
but those are hard to eat on the go.
I know. Why don't you just apply to become executives?
We can't apply to be executives.
There's no opportunity for upward growth.
We shouldn't have to become executives
to get fair treatment.
Ah! Oh, I totally get that.
We want to unionize.
Ooh! Unionize. Oh, no, you don't want to do that.
Unions are a real downer, so boring.
Now's my chance.
Hey-- Hey, look, is she trying to escape?
[Rose] Wow. How'd she get there so fast?
I'll find help and come back and rescue you.
I'm gonna make you proud!
Oh, no. [gasping] Oh, God.
I guess we should try to save her.
Yeah, we should.
Oh, is that an alligator?
Oh, no! Oh, God!
Ooh. Yikes.
[gasping]
[screams]
Ahh!
Looks like we have an opening for a new junior executive.
-Go ahead. -Yeah, that's fine.
-No, no, go ahead. -Come on, warehouse friends,
I know you can do it.
[growling]
So why can't we all be promoted to junior executive?
Well, at our company, we--
we do pride ourselves in having diversity,
but not so much diversity to make anyone uncomfortable.
Hmm.
So we only have room for one white woman
-on the board right now. -Shit.
Well, who gets to take the spot, then?
No one, Deborah.
Becoming executives isn't the point.
The point is making better working conditions
-for the warehouse. -Boring.
Maybe there's a Kinko's nearby.
We could print out our resumÃ©s.
I'm literally a captive audience,
so why don't you just prove to me
which one of you is a better fit.
Ugh! This is the wrong vibe.
We're here to negotiate
better working conditions for everyone, not--
Shh, Dorothy. Let's hear him out.
-How would we prove it? -Fight to the death.
How about something gentle? Like hugging, or--
or whatever you feel like doing.
I'm not entertaining this idea.
Sorry, Steve, but you're not going free
'til you agree to our demands for the warehouse. Period.
Thanks for helping, Rose.
Where the hell did you get smoked paprika, Rose?
I bring some wherever I go. Delicious.
I guess we'd better feed our prisoner.
-Here you go. -Mm-mm-mm.
It smells so good. [slurping]
Damn! Let me get another hit of that shit!
[chuckles]
[slurping]
Very impressive, Dorothy. It's very subtle.
You know, some people go over the top with spices.
Hey, let me try this.
[slurping]
Oh, fuck, it's so balanced.
Hi. I know you already ate some of Dorothy's soup,
but I wanted to bring you something I made special.
It's not a breakfast burrito by chance, is it?
Oh, God! Don't even mention breakfast burritos to me.
I'm obsessed with them.
Well, I guess you'd have to untie me so I can eat it.
I-- I guess so.
You know, I really see something special in you, Rose.
I think you would make an incredible junior executive.
-Really? -Oh, yeah.
I mean, you'd really look the part
more than the other girls.
-In fact, I would love... -Ooh. Oh.
...to see all of you sporting some executive style
'cause you're all a bit warehouse-y right now.
Warehouse-y. You're right.
Sure are gettin' cozy over there, aren't ya?
Oh, him? Yeah,
we were just having a private conversation
-about nothing. -Right.
This was a great idea, Rose. What inspired it?
Oh, nothing, I-- I had a feeling
it might make everyone a little more comfortable.
Rose, I noticed your shorts seem a little bulky.
Oh, shoot, do I have a diaper butt? Ugh.
Why are you still wearing a diaper
when we aren't even in the warehouse?
Oh, I'm used to it.
Ugh. Maybe I should make mine a little bigger
to account for the bulk.
[Steve] Hey, hey! Dorothy. Wait up!
What is it?
I just wanted to chat with you alone.
-What is it? -Come to the bank.
Uh, yeah, just like that, climb up.
Yeah, good, get your body up there, girl.
-[chuckles] -I don't need your help.
Look, I-- I just want to say I really admire
the stand you're taking for the warehouse.
-Oh, yeah? -Yeah.
I really see something special in you, Dorothy.
I think you'd make an incredible junior executive.
-Really? -Yes, really.
[grunts] You know, you'd have a lot more power
on the executive level.
You could change things from the inside.
How come nothing's been changed before, then?
Well, maybe we haven't had
the right kind of person in that role.
-Hmm. -Hey, I wanted to ask you.
Did you ever come across a warehouse friend
named Levar Thompson?
Ah, this is crazy. He's probably--
probably you've never heard of this,
but some people called him, uh--
Dead Man Thompson.
Yeah, I knew him. I had to walk over his body
when he died on the warehouse floor.
Oh, that's awful, just awful to hear.
Say, before he died, did he ever mention anything?
What to you mean, like what?
No-- Nothing. [grunts]
Just curious whether or not he said anything
that was particularly memorable.
He-- He was crazy.
Yes, of course he was. He was crazy.
[snoring]
Oh. Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Look at your tiny, delicate feature skin.
-[muffled scream] -Shh, shh, shh! Just listen.
Listen. You're safe. You're safe.
Here's the thing. You said only one of us
can be the junior executive, and I want that spot.
You see, I'm not gonna let you go
until you tell me I can have it.
I'll let you go if you promise to give me that promotion.
You know, I really see something special in you.
-Oh, my God. -I think you'd make
an incredible junior executive.
-Really? -Mm-hm.
Well, if you mean that, okay.
-Mm-hm. -Thanks for your time.
Great.
Oh, my God. This river water is wonderful.
I feel so free.
I'm so glad, Rose. You're doing great!
Feels pretty good being in here with Dorothy.
This is doing wonders for my medical issue.
[Rose] Oh, good. [chuckles]
Oh, hey.
What are you guys up to? Just treading water?
Not exactly.
We just wanted to get Rose out of her diaper.
I've forgotten how to maintain my bladder control.
It's great to see you care for your friends, Sophia.
-Yeah, thanks. -You know,
I really see something special in you.
I think you'd make an incredible junior executive.
Oh, yeah? What makes you say that?
[chuckles] Oh, I'm very intuitive.
There's a reason I'm the CEO.
-Right. -That is right.
You know, I don't know if I trust him.
-I think he's up to no good. -What do you mean?
I don't know, exactly, but I don't get the sense
he's going to implement our demands.
I like him. When I look into his eyes, I feel safe.
I say we drop the demands and get outta here.
I think I have a good chance of being promoted.
What makes you think he's gonna promote you?
Hm. Wouldn't you like to know.
I have an idea of how we can all get the promotion.
What?
By getting him the one thing he wants the most.
What's that, honey-- uh, Dorothy?
The lost package of the Nile.
-Denial? -The Nile.
Right, denial. Like when you're in love with someone
but you can't admit it.
Yeah, sure. Dead Man Thompson from the warehouse
knew where it was. He told me.
Back in the early 2010s, Steve had the idea of
using drones to deliver packages.
Levar Thompson was the head of logistics at the time.
[gasps] Dead Man Thompson.
That's right, Rose.
Steve put an impossible timeline on the drone delivery,
and it was highly publicized in the press.
At the same time, they received
a large order of whiskey stones
from a frat house in Maine.
Whiskey stones were very big in the 2010s
Well, they keep your drink cold without watering it down.
And they're so cute.
[Dorothy] It was Steve's idea
to send those whiskey stones
on the very first delivery ever sent by drone
even though Thompson didn't feel it was ready.
The delivery went horribly wrong.
They lost their tracking abilities,
and the drone went rogue.
Somehow, the package was accidentally dropped on
the banks of the River Nile,
which was very embarrassing, of course,
because it's nowhere near Maine.
-Right. -Of course.
Very embarrassing.
[Dorothy] Steve bought all the newspapers to bury the story,
and the company used all its resources
to look for the package.
They sent out a search and rescue team on boats.
They even used other drones to scan for the first drone,
but nothing.
Steve put all the blame on Thompson,
and as punishment,
banished him to the warehouse.
Oh, my God. And then they must have
bumped him off for telling you. Is that how he died?
No. He just died from exhaustion
because the working conditions are so horrible.
-Oh. -But...
the lost package of the Nile
was never to be seen again,
and this single, glaring error haunts Steve to this day.
Technically, it wasn't my fault, warehouse friends,
but you'll never be able to find it.
If we find that package,
will you promise to honor our demands?
[chuckles] I promise.
The lost package of the Nile has baffled our experts.
I even organized this last executive trip
as a cover to search for it myself
as I'm smarter than anyone.
If you can track it down, you'll be considered heroes.
So, how are we supposed to find this lost package, anyway?
Yeah. What did Dead Man Thompson say?
Did he give you some kind of map?
He gave me a riddle. He said it's where
the muck is thick and a boat gets sick.
I always thought he was muttering nonsense.
How did you know it was a clue?
[Dorothy] We spent some time together
in the infirmary.
Where the muck is thick
and a boat gets sick.
What could that mean?
Hey! This looks like a mucky place.
[Sophia] Hey, we're stuck.
Stuck? Sick? A boat gets sick.
It must be around here.
Come on, girls, we have to move it together.
I said come on, dammit! Dorothy, are you with me?
-I'm with you, Sophia. -I'm with you guys, too.
I'm with you, too. From back here.
Okay, now let's pull.
[grunting]
Ugh! We've been pulling for ages,
and we've only gone a few feet.
-[grunts] -Yeah, this is rough.
I'm starting to have problems with my medical issue.
You should take a break.
Thanks for understanding, Sophia.
-You got it. -Hey, we'll take over.
Yeah. I really can't get my diaper wet, though.
God, this is mucky as hell.
This feels so good on my bare legs.
-[grunts] I've got it. -No, I've got it.
-[grunts] I've got it, Rose. -No, I got it.
Come on, Deborah.
I want to show Dorothy how strong I am.
[Steve] Looking good, warehouse friends.
[Deborah] Oh, boy, what momentum!
[Dorothy] It must be just past here.
[Rose] Gosh. This all looks the same to me.
How can you tell?
[Dorothy] We solved the complicated riddle, Rose,
and now we know where the treasure is.
[Dorothy] We're here.
-Wowee! Let's go! -Yeah!
Let's get that missing package.
I can't go back to that warehouse.
Let's just dig at the ground with our hands.
It'll feel more satisfying that way.
[Deborah] Oh! I already feel so connected to the earth.
[grunting]
[Sophia] I don't think we're actually making progress.
Shovel! We need the shovel over here!
Shovel? Coming right up.
[Steve] Now you're thinking with your brains,
executive style.
[grunting]
[Sophia] I got it! It's right here on the surface,
barely obscured by this grass.
Oh! Open it. Open it!
I can't. It's locked.
Come on, warehouse friends. I know you can do it.
Oh, hell, I'll shoot it open.
[Rose] Oh, God. We aren't wearing protective eye gear.
[gunshot]
Yes!
You got it.
-[sighs] -Open it, open it!
I am. Hold on, everyone.
Oh-- [chuckles] Never mind, it wasn't locked.
-Sorry about that. -Oh, my God.
Look at these whiskey stones. There are so many of them.
Oh, look how teeny tiny they are.
Does anyone mind if I pour them over my head?
-No, go ahead. -Yeah, that's fine.
-Yes, go for it. -Woohoo! Yes!
Goddamn, Rose. That looks like fun.
Oh, it is. Oh!
Well, now that that's over,
you might as well tell these ladies that
I'm getting the promotion.
What do you mean? I never promised that.
-What?! -[grunts]
You dirty corporate scumbag!
Wait a second.
Did he tell you he thought you'd be
a good junior executive?
Yeah. He all but gave me the job.
I didn't promise anything.
I just said I thought you'd be great.
You son of a bitch!
What about our demands for the warehouse?
You said you would honor them.
Oh, I am. I'm honoring them right now.
Like in the modern bullshit version of the word.
Fuck all this together shit. I'm taking you and the job.
Ugh! Deborah has always been a shady bitch.
-Am I right? -Oh, shut up, Rose!
Um, fuck you, Deborah.
-Ah! -[grunting]
[Dorothy] Come on, we can't let
this executive position get between us.
-I always hated you. -[grunting]
Don't you tell them what to do.
Oh, God, a knife! My medical condition!
We all know you have hemorrhoids, Dorothy.
-Why don't you just admit it? -No! Never!
I'll always refer to it as my medical condition!
-[punches landing] -No!
-[gunshot] -[Steve] Hey! Everyone!
Deborah's in the tree with the gun!
[Rose] Hey. Hey, everyone, stop fighting!
-[Steve] Oh, God! You, too? -[gunshot]
-Karate chop! -Oh! Why?
[grunting]
I thought we were friends!
-[grunting] -[screaming]
I'm gonna be an executive!
-[grunting] -Ooh!
-[punch landing] -[screaming]
-Ah, ha-ha! -Yee-uh!
Uh!
[Sophia] Ha, ha, ha! I'm gonna be an executive!
[panting, grunting]
Ha-ha! Yes! Ha-ha! Oh, Dorothy, no!
Oh, I'll always love you!
[gasping]
[grunting]
-Oh! -[grunting]
[gasping]
Oh, no! A sudden cramp!
So, I guess we're the only two left.
Yeah. I guess so. [sighs]
Will you untie me?
I keep forgetting we tied you up.
[chuckles] Seems funny now.
I guess you've got the spot for...
the junior executive.
Oh, okay. [muttering]
[chuckles]
I guess so.
Welcome to the executive level.
[moans]
Oh... [moans]
A rescue boat?
Oh, they've been watching. They've always been watching.
Let's go.
[Steve] What's the first thing you're going to do
as a junior executive?
Well, first, I'm gonna unionize the warehouse workers.
-Kidding. -[chuckling]
I'm gonna go get a breakfast burrito.
Oh... [grunts] Huh? Huh?
Dorothy?
Dorothy? Dorothy?
Dorothy!