1 00:00:17,434 --> 00:00:20,520 [soft music playing] 2 00:00:27,402 --> 00:00:28,737 [man] Okay, okay. 3 00:00:28,820 --> 00:00:30,030 This one is better. 4 00:00:30,113 --> 00:00:31,406 [man 1] Another one? Oh, you're killing me. 5 00:00:31,489 --> 00:00:33,783 [man] Aw, come on, you don't want to hear 'em, I won't tell 'em. 6 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:35,994 -[man 1] No, no, no, tell. -[man] Oh, now you want to hear it? 7 00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:37,871 -Tell the joke, I'd love to hear it. -Okay, all right. 8 00:00:37,954 --> 00:00:42,751 So, this Rabbi and his prized student are walking in the old country, right? 9 00:00:42,834 --> 00:00:45,378 And they decide to pitch their tent 10 00:00:45,462 --> 00:00:48,506 for the night in some pasture, and they fall asleep. 11 00:00:48,590 --> 00:00:49,549 Yeah. 12 00:00:49,632 --> 00:00:53,011 A few hours later, the Rabbi wakes up 13 00:00:53,094 --> 00:00:55,180 and-- and he-- he shakes, 14 00:00:55,263 --> 00:00:59,559 he shakes his student and says, "Avi, Avi, wake up! 15 00:00:59,642 --> 00:01:01,686 Look up. What do you see?" 16 00:01:01,770 --> 00:01:05,482 And he says, "I see a million stars, Rabbi." 17 00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:09,027 And he said, "But what do you learn from this?" 18 00:01:09,110 --> 00:01:12,697 And he thinks, and he looks up, and says-- 19 00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:14,199 -Oh, shit! -What? 20 00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:18,620 Sheesh. 21 00:01:19,537 --> 00:01:21,623 [instrumental music begins] 22 00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:02,789 [jazz music playing] 23 00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:34,320 We gotta pick up a challah. 24 00:02:36,614 --> 00:02:39,284 So, your parents are good on Shabbos? 25 00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:41,411 Yeah, they, I mean, they know what this is. 26 00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:43,705 They just haven't been to one before. 27 00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:45,290 Okay, I just don't want them to freak out. 28 00:02:45,373 --> 00:02:47,167 They're not gonna freak out. 29 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:49,168 I told them to expect some prayers 30 00:02:49,252 --> 00:02:51,170 and to keep their phones in their pockets. 31 00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:52,422 Great. Hi, Gary. 32 00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:54,007 [Gary] You guys ready for tonight? 33 00:02:54,090 --> 00:02:55,592 H-how do you know about that? 34 00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:57,302 [Gary] Your dad was here earlier. 35 00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:00,597 Okay. you mind putting this on my tab? 36 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,307 You know, I'll put on your mom's. 37 00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:04,017 That's the one I was talking about. 38 00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:05,727 -Love you, Gary. -Love you. 39 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:10,023 [man talking indistinctly] 40 00:03:24,662 --> 00:03:27,165 [music fades out] 41 00:03:27,248 --> 00:03:28,249 -Hey! -Hey! 42 00:03:28,333 --> 00:03:30,251 Oh, watch out. 43 00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:32,545 The hottest couple on the Upper West Side coming through. 44 00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:34,839 -Oh, I don't know about that. -Aw, come on, now. 45 00:03:34,923 --> 00:03:36,132 Oh, David... 46 00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:37,926 I got the menorah, brother. 47 00:03:38,009 --> 00:03:39,219 [David] Mmm. 48 00:03:39,302 --> 00:03:41,763 You know what it's gonna be, right? 49 00:03:41,846 --> 00:03:43,056 It's gonna be lit. 50 00:03:43,139 --> 00:03:44,682 It's gonna be lit! 51 00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:47,101 So, you guys, uh, ready for tonight? 52 00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:48,811 You talked to my Dad? 53 00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:50,897 Yeah we kind of talked a little bit. Y'all nervous? 54 00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:52,315 -No. -Very. 55 00:03:52,398 --> 00:03:53,942 -Well... -Well, you just seemed like-- 56 00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:55,860 -I think I'm a little-- -I'm, like, excited, but-- 57 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,111 Guys it'll be fine, come on. 58 00:03:57,195 --> 00:04:00,573 I tell you what, when Cano takes over my shift, 59 00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:03,034 I'll pop upstairs and I'll smooth things out. 60 00:04:03,117 --> 00:04:04,577 You good with in-laws from Wisconsin? 61 00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:06,329 I am great with in-laws from Wisconsin. 62 00:04:06,412 --> 00:04:07,872 Read my resume, brother. 63 00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:09,332 -Well, there we go. -There we go. 64 00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:11,584 And, Meg, you have nothing to worry about. 65 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:13,544 Just make sure you sit next to my guy Richie. 66 00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:16,297 Oh, well, I usually sit next to this guy, 67 00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:18,049 but maybe I won't this time. 68 00:04:18,132 --> 00:04:20,134 [woman coughs] 69 00:04:20,218 --> 00:04:22,220 Mrs. Grundwerg, good to see you. 70 00:04:25,848 --> 00:04:27,058 She seems great. 71 00:04:27,141 --> 00:04:30,061 Seriously, I mean David's cool and all, but Richie? 72 00:04:30,144 --> 00:04:32,063 Come on man, Richie's the shit. 73 00:04:32,146 --> 00:04:33,648 -Am I right? -You are right. 74 00:04:33,731 --> 00:04:36,109 -She agrees with me. -I do agree with you. 75 00:04:36,192 --> 00:04:37,986 [Meg] Richie is the shit. 76 00:04:38,069 --> 00:04:40,113 -Good Shabbos, guys! -Good Shabbos! 77 00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:41,656 [elevator dings] 78 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:47,287 It's "Good Shabbos," right? 79 00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:49,455 -Yeah, that's it. -Shabbos. 80 00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:53,334 Just that your mom always corrects me, so I just-- I want-- 81 00:04:53,418 --> 00:04:55,336 No, it's perfect. You said it perfectly. 82 00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:56,963 -Shabbos? -Yeah, you always say it perfectly. 83 00:04:57,046 --> 00:04:59,382 Okay. -Yeah, it's impeccable. 84 00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:00,842 -All right. -You're so good. 85 00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:02,719 -Good. -You look good. You are good. 86 00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:04,262 -Marry me. -Well, I'm going to. 87 00:05:04,345 --> 00:05:05,888 -Thank you. -You're welcome. 88 00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:07,765 [elevator doors open] 89 00:05:07,849 --> 00:05:10,184 -We should have eloped. -Yeah, I agree. 90 00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:14,814 Okay. 91 00:05:14,897 --> 00:05:17,525 -Good? -[David] Yeah. What? 92 00:05:17,608 --> 00:05:18,943 [Meg] Just smudged a little... 93 00:05:19,027 --> 00:05:20,111 [man] What about the macaroni salad? 94 00:05:20,194 --> 00:05:21,821 [woman] That's for Adam. 95 00:05:21,904 --> 00:05:23,573 [man] Oh. Well, what about the marinated mushrooms? 96 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:25,199 I mean, nobody even likes them. 97 00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:26,868 [woman] You eat the marinated mushrooms. 98 00:05:26,951 --> 00:05:28,995 -No I don't. -I've seen you eat it. 99 00:05:29,078 --> 00:05:31,205 [man] No, I only eat it because you buy it. 100 00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:33,041 [woman] I only buy it because you eat it. 101 00:05:33,124 --> 00:05:35,001 -[Meg] Good Shabbos! -[David] Good Shabbos! 102 00:05:35,084 --> 00:05:38,171 [woman] Oh, my God! [man] Oh, they've arrived! 103 00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:39,964 You've arrived! 104 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:42,133 -Yeah, yeah. -And you brought the challah, too. 105 00:05:42,216 --> 00:05:43,468 Couldn't forget that. 106 00:05:43,551 --> 00:05:45,094 [David] Yeah, we got the fruit, too. 107 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:46,763 Oh, you got fruit, too? They got fruit, too. 108 00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:48,431 -Can you believe it? -Oh, that's so thoughtful. 109 00:05:48,514 --> 00:05:50,433 -Is it cut? -No, but I can cut it. 110 00:05:50,516 --> 00:05:52,685 [woman] Oh, no, that's okay. You enjoy yourself. 111 00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:55,271 [Meg] It's really, it's fine. It's like the one thing I know how to do. 112 00:05:57,065 --> 00:06:00,318 Oh, that's a... milchig knife. 113 00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:01,861 -Oh! -David, forks! 114 00:06:01,944 --> 00:06:03,654 -Yeah, okay. -Right here. 115 00:06:03,738 --> 00:06:05,239 [David] Oh, sorry. 116 00:06:07,617 --> 00:06:10,078 -There you go. -Thank you. Super. 117 00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:12,914 [David] And it's called the Alexander Technique? 118 00:06:12,997 --> 00:06:14,832 Yeah, you know, I feel a straight spine 119 00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:19,629 gives you a sense of calm, you know, a sense of... 120 00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:22,215 -authority. I like that. -Uh-huh. 121 00:06:22,298 --> 00:06:24,258 Hey, what did you think of the book, by the way? 122 00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:25,384 About Alexander Technique? 123 00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:29,097 No, no. Non-Violent Communication, 124 00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:30,264 -N.V.C. -Oh, yeah, N.V.C. 125 00:06:30,348 --> 00:06:32,517 Um, you know... I bought it. 126 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,894 Oh, hey, David, it's a game changer. 127 00:06:34,977 --> 00:06:36,854 I think it's gonna help you at the office, too. 128 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:39,023 Yeah, you know, I just, 129 00:06:39,107 --> 00:06:41,442 I don't know how much it's gonna help with negotiations, Dad. 130 00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:46,823 David, it is about everything, every facet of life. 131 00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,449 Okay. 132 00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:52,787 You look insane. 133 00:06:52,870 --> 00:06:54,539 But I feel good. 134 00:06:54,622 --> 00:06:55,790 All right. 135 00:06:58,459 --> 00:06:59,544 Should I cut the other half? 136 00:07:00,878 --> 00:07:01,921 Oh! 137 00:07:02,004 --> 00:07:03,923 Is that okay? 138 00:07:04,006 --> 00:07:06,425 -I'll take over. -No, no, I can do it. 139 00:07:06,509 --> 00:07:08,886 -No, no, no, it's fine. -No, Ellen, please, I enjoy it, it's fine. 140 00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:10,138 -Could you just-- -What? 141 00:07:10,221 --> 00:07:12,890 I...I like to serve it in cubes. 142 00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:14,976 Yeah. No, I-- totally. I get it. 143 00:07:15,059 --> 00:07:16,102 It's a quick fix. It's easy. 144 00:07:16,185 --> 00:07:19,021 Okay. -Yeah. 145 00:07:19,105 --> 00:07:21,774 I'll be sure to bring my melon baller next time. 146 00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:29,031 So, um, the Rabbi was saying 147 00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:31,993 something really-- really funny yesterday after class. 148 00:07:32,076 --> 00:07:33,870 -Oh, yeah? -Yeah, yeah. 149 00:07:33,953 --> 00:07:37,790 He was saying how um, well, the good thing about converts 150 00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:40,418 is that we bring new genes to the pool 151 00:07:40,501 --> 00:07:43,087 so that can help with diseases like colitis 152 00:07:43,171 --> 00:07:46,549 -and, um-- -I don't have colitis. 153 00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:48,217 No, I know. No, sorry. 154 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,760 I think that he meant in general that it's-- 155 00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:51,888 [Ellen] But no one in our family has that problem. 156 00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:53,931 No, right. So, I think he just-- 157 00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,641 I think he meant as like a, like a joke. 158 00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:57,643 -Oh. -Yeah. 159 00:07:57,727 --> 00:08:01,022 Oh, my baby! There's my little zeeskeit! 160 00:08:01,105 --> 00:08:02,607 Aw, look at the face. 161 00:08:02,690 --> 00:08:04,317 Look at the face, look at the face! 162 00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,027 [David] Hey, Mom, we need some glasses. 163 00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:07,862 [Ellen] Okay, check the dishwasher. 164 00:08:07,945 --> 00:08:11,032 [David] Hi, Larry. Oh, you're making little cubes. 165 00:08:11,115 --> 00:08:12,742 [Ellen] Did you say hello to your brother? 166 00:08:12,825 --> 00:08:14,494 [David] Uh, no, I was helping Dad with the-- 167 00:08:14,577 --> 00:08:15,745 [Ellen] Well, go say hi. 168 00:08:15,828 --> 00:08:17,872 He probably heard you come in. I bet he's already offended. 169 00:08:17,955 --> 00:08:19,832 -I'll be right back. -You don't have to be right back. 170 00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:21,167 [David] Uh-huh. 171 00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:24,170 Richard, I was talking to Jordan downstairs. 172 00:08:24,253 --> 00:08:25,546 He loves you. 173 00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:28,299 -Ha! Jordan's the shit. -[giggles] 174 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:37,725 Hey, come on, you can do that on the balcony. 175 00:08:37,808 --> 00:08:39,143 [man] Uh, no, thank you. 176 00:08:39,227 --> 00:08:41,979 I've heard enough from your dad about oral fixations. 177 00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:46,067 -Who are you texting? -You want to check it? 178 00:08:46,150 --> 00:08:48,528 We're 20 minutes late. Can you please just-- 179 00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:49,946 Tell them I'm parking the car. 180 00:08:50,029 --> 00:08:51,656 What? 181 00:08:51,739 --> 00:08:52,740 [angrily] What? 182 00:08:52,823 --> 00:08:55,660 No car. No car on Shabbos. 183 00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:57,453 We don't drive on Shabbos! 184 00:08:57,537 --> 00:09:00,456 And yet... 185 00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,166 Okay, this is-- this is what we'll say. 186 00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:04,210 We forgot the wine. Here, take this. 187 00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:07,421 So, you went to pick it up on 74th Street. 188 00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:09,632 Great. 189 00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:11,592 So can you say it? 190 00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:13,594 We forgot the wine, and I got it-- 191 00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:16,931 On 74th Street! 192 00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:19,475 On 74th. 193 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:22,228 This is mine. I'm taking this. Okay? 194 00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:33,281 [Ellen] Richard, there won't be anything left for dinner. 195 00:09:33,364 --> 00:09:35,992 -[woman] Hello! -[sighs] Finally she's here. 196 00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:39,704 [Both chuckle] 197 00:09:40,621 --> 00:09:42,456 [Ellen] Abella! 198 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:43,916 What happened? 199 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:45,459 What do you mean? The Uber just was late. 200 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:47,336 [Ellen] Well, you should have checked Lyft. 201 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:48,879 The fastest option would be driving. 202 00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:51,090 -What? -Hey, Abb. 203 00:09:51,173 --> 00:09:53,134 -Hey! -Hi! Ah... 204 00:09:53,217 --> 00:09:54,552 Where's Benjamin? Is he coming? 205 00:09:54,635 --> 00:09:56,596 Yeah, he's coming. He's just grabbing wine. 206 00:09:56,679 --> 00:09:57,847 -Oh. -Yeah. 207 00:09:57,930 --> 00:09:58,931 [Ellen] And things are good? 208 00:09:59,015 --> 00:10:01,058 [Abby] Yeah! Very good. 209 00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:02,685 Good. 210 00:10:02,768 --> 00:10:04,437 [Abby] With your face, why are you doing that? 211 00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:06,731 What? No, nothing. 212 00:10:09,734 --> 00:10:11,902 -You did mention that-- -Mom! 213 00:10:11,986 --> 00:10:13,863 No, nothing, good. I'm glad everything's good. 214 00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:15,364 -Great. -Okay, good, good. 215 00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:17,908 -I'm glad it's great. -It's very good. 216 00:10:17,992 --> 00:10:21,078 [loud techno music playing indistinctly] 217 00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:28,377 [man] Yeah. 218 00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:29,795 Uh, it's David. 219 00:10:29,879 --> 00:10:31,714 [man] Alexa pause. 220 00:10:31,797 --> 00:10:33,174 -[music continues] -Pause, bitch! 221 00:10:33,257 --> 00:10:34,508 [Music stops] 222 00:10:34,592 --> 00:10:35,926 Hey, bud. 223 00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:38,137 [man sighs] 224 00:10:39,513 --> 00:10:41,015 Hey, I'd hug you, but I'm really sweaty. 225 00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:42,808 That's okay. 226 00:10:42,892 --> 00:10:45,227 Are those my boxers? 227 00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:46,604 No. 228 00:10:46,687 --> 00:10:48,189 Why don't you get in the shower, man? 229 00:10:48,272 --> 00:10:50,608 No, I'm way too stressed right now. 230 00:10:50,691 --> 00:10:52,109 That's nice. I thought Abby was the only one 231 00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:54,278 who cared about making a good impression. 232 00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:57,281 [man] What you talking about? Abby only gives a shit about herself. 233 00:10:57,365 --> 00:11:00,534 The way she lets her boyfriend speak to me? It's disgusting. 234 00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:02,536 Let's just maybe, like, cool it on Benjamin. 235 00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:04,372 -Benjamin? That slimy cocksuck? -Okay. 236 00:11:04,455 --> 00:11:06,832 Imagine if I had a girlfriend who was rude to Abby. 237 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,334 Do you think I'd try to be fair? 238 00:11:08,417 --> 00:11:10,252 Do you think I would giggle and say, "Be nice?" No. 239 00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:12,797 -No. No, no. -I'd get mad at my girlfriend, 240 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:15,091 and I probably already would have dumped her by this point 241 00:11:15,174 --> 00:11:18,552 if she's the type of person to denigrate my siblings. 242 00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:20,930 So this has nothing to do with Meg's parents? 243 00:11:21,013 --> 00:11:22,848 -I don't know Meg's parents. -Well, you know, they're-- 244 00:11:22,932 --> 00:11:24,600 [man] I'm sure they're fine. Meg's really nice. 245 00:11:24,683 --> 00:11:27,770 Adam, they're coming for dinner tonight. 246 00:11:27,853 --> 00:11:29,438 Oh, cool. I'm excited to meet them. 247 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:31,565 [David] Yeah, so maybe don't start any shit with Abby or-- 248 00:11:31,649 --> 00:11:33,067 Benjamin that philandering cocksuck? 249 00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:37,363 Sure, yeah, the cocksuck. Just be quiet or be nice. Please? 250 00:11:37,446 --> 00:11:38,823 -He starts shit with me, man. -I know. 251 00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:40,157 -You know that. -I know! 252 00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:42,785 But these people, they're like... 253 00:11:42,868 --> 00:11:44,954 not used to families arguing. 254 00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:46,080 What are they, Mormon? 255 00:11:46,163 --> 00:11:48,165 No, they're polite. Okay? 256 00:11:48,249 --> 00:11:49,834 -So, please, I am beg-- -Okay, okay. 257 00:11:49,917 --> 00:11:52,169 Don't worry. I won't strike first. 258 00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:53,838 -Thank you. -But... 259 00:11:53,921 --> 00:11:55,673 If he provokes me, 260 00:11:55,756 --> 00:12:00,177 I will respond with full force. 261 00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:02,096 Okay. 262 00:12:02,179 --> 00:12:04,765 Oh. Right back to it. 263 00:12:06,892 --> 00:12:09,395 [sighs] 264 00:12:09,478 --> 00:12:11,272 [music resumes] 265 00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:17,319 [music fades out] 266 00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,238 -David! -Hey, Ben! 267 00:12:19,321 --> 00:12:23,409 What's crappening? Any secret tips for me? 268 00:12:23,492 --> 00:12:25,911 -Tips? -Mergees, acquisishees? 269 00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:29,748 No, only uh, well, Meg's parents are coming tonight. So... 270 00:12:29,832 --> 00:12:32,918 so the merging of-of fam-families. 271 00:12:33,002 --> 00:12:35,671 I'm sorry, man. That is rough. 272 00:12:35,754 --> 00:12:37,756 Well, listen, don't worry about it, 273 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,009 just keep playing the role of nice boyfriend 274 00:12:40,092 --> 00:12:41,886 and look to the bachelor party. 275 00:12:41,969 --> 00:12:43,637 Bachelor party? 276 00:12:43,721 --> 00:12:46,098 You know, where it's gonna be, what we're gonna do. 277 00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:47,975 I haven't really thought about it that much. 278 00:12:48,058 --> 00:12:50,478 Oh, you know what, Meg and her friends are doing a spa day, 279 00:12:50,561 --> 00:12:53,898 Maybe we can hop on that train. 280 00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:56,150 That's good. You're in character. 281 00:12:56,233 --> 00:12:58,277 All right. Yo? -Ben, just a small favor. 282 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:01,030 Could you just maybe take it easy on Adam tonight, 283 00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:02,740 you know, try to avoid any open conflict? 284 00:13:02,823 --> 00:13:04,825 -What, did he say something? -No, nothing. 285 00:13:04,909 --> 00:13:07,328 It's just, you know, last week and the week before that... 286 00:13:07,411 --> 00:13:08,621 -I never start it. -I know. 287 00:13:08,704 --> 00:13:09,580 -You know that. -I know. 288 00:13:09,663 --> 00:13:11,332 Why would I pick a fight with a toddler? 289 00:13:11,415 --> 00:13:12,875 That's exactly the type of thing you shouldn't say. 290 00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:14,376 David, David, you'll be great. 291 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:16,670 Thank you. Not worried... 292 00:13:16,754 --> 00:13:18,547 about me. 293 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:22,426 Everyone, phones off and away. 294 00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:25,346 It's time to light. Abby, come. 295 00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:26,514 Richard. 296 00:13:26,597 --> 00:13:27,890 -Sorry. -Did you light yet? 297 00:13:27,973 --> 00:13:30,059 Oh, no, no, I haven't practiced the blessing enough yet. 298 00:13:30,142 --> 00:13:32,311 -It's fine. -Okay, well, now's your chance. 299 00:13:32,394 --> 00:13:34,188 -Let's go. -Okay. 300 00:13:36,148 --> 00:13:37,358 [match strikes] 301 00:14:01,215 --> 00:14:04,009 [singing Hebrew prayer] 302 00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,892 [praying continues] 303 00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:24,238 -You crushed that. -Thank you. 304 00:14:24,321 --> 00:14:26,448 -Good Shabbos. -Good Shabbos. 305 00:14:26,532 --> 00:14:28,868 -Good Shabbos. -Good Shabbos. 306 00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:30,703 [toilet flushes] 307 00:14:30,786 --> 00:14:34,164 [sighs] Oh, God. 308 00:14:41,088 --> 00:14:43,549 -Oh, hey, Benj! -Richie. 309 00:14:43,632 --> 00:14:44,758 -Hey. -How you doing? 310 00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:46,260 -Good, yeah. -You good? 311 00:14:46,343 --> 00:14:47,720 What do you-- what do you got there? 312 00:14:47,803 --> 00:14:49,179 A little Galina Bordeaux. 313 00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:50,639 -Galina? -Grapes from Israel, 314 00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,391 but the varietal's from France. 315 00:14:52,474 --> 00:14:54,184 -Varietal? -Varietal. 316 00:14:54,268 --> 00:14:56,020 It's got the wax seal. That's how you know it's fancy. 317 00:14:56,103 --> 00:14:57,396 Oh, that's wonderful. Thank you. 318 00:14:57,479 --> 00:14:58,564 -Happy to. -Thank you for that. 319 00:14:58,647 --> 00:14:59,815 But you know what? 320 00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:02,860 I go for the... Reserva tequila. 321 00:15:08,782 --> 00:15:10,701 God, I hate it here. 322 00:15:10,784 --> 00:15:13,621 [Meg] I don't think we're gonna do it in New York. It's too-- 323 00:15:13,704 --> 00:15:16,916 Meg, I tell you, tonight is gonna be terrific. 324 00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:19,543 I promise you, I have a million questions for your parents. 325 00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:20,836 Here you go, Ben. 326 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,922 [Meg] I'm so happy to hear that, Richard. 327 00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:24,632 I do love that we pregame family dinner. 328 00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:27,092 -Yeah. -Me too. 329 00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:29,261 [Richard] Well, you know, Wisconsin is the number-one exporter of cheese, 330 00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:34,266 so one state is making all this delightful cheese for everybody to enjoy. 331 00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:35,643 -Cheese, yeah. -Uh-huh. 332 00:15:35,726 --> 00:15:37,227 You know her parents aren't farmers, right? 333 00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:39,229 [Meg] Yeah, but my Grandpa was a cheese fanatic, 334 00:15:39,313 --> 00:15:40,689 so my Dad loves talking cheese. 335 00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:44,026 God, I miss dairy. I would murder for a slice of pizza. 336 00:15:44,109 --> 00:15:46,195 Yeah, not as long as we share a bathroom. Cheers. 337 00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:47,988 Richie, what do we got? 338 00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:49,698 Oh, that's a tequila cosmo. 339 00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:50,866 How long has it been? 340 00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:53,744 Oh, since I've had pizza or dairy in general? 341 00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:55,788 Ellen, it's such a good question. 342 00:15:55,871 --> 00:15:58,332 I want to say, God, I want to say college? Maybe even earlier. 343 00:15:58,415 --> 00:16:00,000 -Been a while. -Mmm, that would kill me. 344 00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:02,503 Where is Adam? 345 00:16:02,586 --> 00:16:06,048 -Probably taking a nap. -No, he's changing, Ben. 346 00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:08,342 You know, Adam's been working out a lot. 347 00:16:08,425 --> 00:16:10,177 You know, he's really dedicated. 348 00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:12,429 He's very buff. He's become very buff. 349 00:16:12,513 --> 00:16:14,640 Yeah, I mean, not mass, but dense-- denser. 350 00:16:14,723 --> 00:16:18,143 [Richard] Yeah, he works out in his room. You know, just simple calisthenics. 351 00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:19,687 He should try going to a gym. 352 00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:21,230 -Well-- -Adam's a homebody. 353 00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:22,648 -Right. -But he doesn't, like, work, 354 00:16:22,731 --> 00:16:24,358 doesn't...explore. 355 00:16:24,441 --> 00:16:26,026 Well, he worked for Benjamin this summer. 356 00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:27,236 For two weeks. 357 00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:28,487 It was a memorable two weeks. 358 00:16:28,570 --> 00:16:30,698 [Ellen] He knows what he wants, and he knows what he doesn't want. 359 00:16:30,781 --> 00:16:32,282 He refused to learn PowerPoint. 360 00:16:32,366 --> 00:16:33,575 Abby! 361 00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,829 -Hey, Adam! -[all greeting Adam] 362 00:16:36,912 --> 00:16:40,165 -Adam! -Hey, the Golden Intern. 363 00:16:40,249 --> 00:16:43,210 Good thing you don't need to use PowerPoint in the Navy SEALs. 364 00:16:43,293 --> 00:16:44,253 There he is. 365 00:16:44,336 --> 00:16:47,381 [Meg] Does the Israeli army have a Navy SEALs, Adam? 366 00:16:47,464 --> 00:16:50,634 It's called Shayetet, IDF's most elite combat unit. 367 00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:53,053 [Ellen] IDF? You can't go to the IDF. 368 00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:54,263 What do they need you for? 369 00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:57,850 I'm sure any military would welcome young men in peak physical condition. 370 00:16:57,933 --> 00:17:00,853 Physical and mental condition. Don't forget your sharp mind, Adam. 371 00:17:00,936 --> 00:17:03,230 [David] Um, Mom, the food smells delicious-- 372 00:17:03,313 --> 00:17:05,858 [Ellen] How can you go to the IDF? You don't even speak the language. 373 00:17:05,941 --> 00:17:09,570 I know the aleph bet, the building blocks of the language. 374 00:17:09,653 --> 00:17:10,821 Wow. That's impressive. 375 00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:12,573 I really don't think you need to comment. 376 00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:15,451 ♪ Alef Bet Gimmel... ♪ 377 00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:17,911 -What's with the comments? -It's fine. 378 00:17:17,995 --> 00:17:19,747 -Sing it, Adam. -I am singing it. 379 00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:21,248 -And then it's Vav, right? -Yeah, Vav. 380 00:17:21,331 --> 00:17:22,541 Whoa, very good, Meg! 381 00:17:22,624 --> 00:17:23,667 Thank you. 382 00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:25,753 ♪ Yud, Chaf, Lamen, Mem, Nun-- ♪ 383 00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:27,254 I think he's ready to deploy. 384 00:17:27,337 --> 00:17:28,714 What is with you? 385 00:17:28,797 --> 00:17:30,591 [David] You have this weird obsession. It's strange-- 386 00:17:30,674 --> 00:17:32,593 I'm saying nice things. You're all acting like he's an idiot. 387 00:17:32,676 --> 00:17:35,137 -We're not saying that he's an idiot. -No one's saying he's an idiot. 388 00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:41,310 I need a Klonopin. 389 00:17:41,393 --> 00:17:43,020 Aw, Adam! 390 00:17:43,103 --> 00:17:44,563 It's not "Aw." There's no "Aw!" 391 00:17:44,646 --> 00:17:46,690 [Ellen] Yeah, but Klonopin gets you all constipated. 392 00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:47,733 [Adam] Mom! 393 00:17:47,816 --> 00:17:50,152 [David] Great, now he's gonna be pissed all of dinner. 394 00:17:50,235 --> 00:17:52,613 No, he's about to get zonked out. This'll be better. 395 00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,615 [loud music playing] 396 00:17:54,698 --> 00:17:56,867 [man singing in native language] 397 00:18:16,386 --> 00:18:18,138 [pills crush] 398 00:18:27,523 --> 00:18:28,690 [loud music ends] 399 00:18:28,774 --> 00:18:30,025 Hey, David, got an idea for you. 400 00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:31,276 Maybe you should chill a little. 401 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:33,654 [David] All the nights to do this stupid bullshit and pick a fight. 402 00:18:33,737 --> 00:18:35,322 -Oh, my God. -Okay, so it's not about Adam. 403 00:18:35,405 --> 00:18:36,490 [cell phone dings] 404 00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:38,158 It's just about you and your perfect night. 405 00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:39,827 -You're so self-obsessed. -What's wrong with that? 406 00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:41,662 -Oh, they're running late. -Thank God. 407 00:18:41,745 --> 00:18:43,372 Adam! 408 00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:44,873 [Meg] Adam. Hey! 409 00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,459 -Big A! -How you feeling, sweetie? 410 00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:49,586 Thank you all for the concern, 411 00:18:49,670 --> 00:18:52,798 but I'm always one Klonopin away from total serenity. 412 00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:54,299 That's good, Adam. 413 00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:58,178 It is good, Abby. It's very good. 414 00:18:58,262 --> 00:19:01,265 Some Klonopin and a little mindfulness. That's the key. 415 00:19:01,348 --> 00:19:03,809 Probably pretty important for the army. 416 00:19:03,892 --> 00:19:05,811 It's definitely key, Meg. 417 00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:07,396 Based on my research, 418 00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:10,774 a good soldier has to ignore every distraction, 419 00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:13,694 no matter how morally debased his enemy is. 420 00:19:16,363 --> 00:19:17,823 Dad, can I refill your glass? 421 00:19:17,906 --> 00:19:19,199 Oh, sure! 422 00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:20,534 [Ellen] I think the Klonopin's helping. 423 00:19:20,617 --> 00:19:22,411 [Richard] Who knows? 424 00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:24,413 Hey, who wants to play Bananagrams while we're waiting? 425 00:19:24,496 --> 00:19:25,914 -Oh, my God. -No one wants to play, but-- 426 00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:27,082 -I do! -You wanna play? 427 00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:28,667 -Well, I would-- -Maybe after dinner. 428 00:19:28,750 --> 00:19:30,377 No, I'll set it up. Just a round. 429 00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:32,254 -No, she said after dinner. -We'll do a warm-up. 430 00:19:32,337 --> 00:19:33,338 [Ellen] We said no. 431 00:19:33,422 --> 00:19:35,465 [Richard] Look, you know, we always start playing and you love it. 432 00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:37,426 -I'm gonna go to the bathroom. -[Ellen] Nobody wants to play! 433 00:19:37,509 --> 00:19:38,635 Okay. -[Abby] Dad! 434 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:40,179 [Ellen] Agreed. Nobody wants to play. 435 00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:42,431 [Richard] Okay. Just an idea. 436 00:19:42,514 --> 00:19:44,766 -We'll play after dinner. -Okay. 437 00:19:44,850 --> 00:19:49,605 It's never as good after dinner because people are drunk and tired. 438 00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:52,357 [water running] 439 00:19:52,441 --> 00:19:53,650 [exhales] 440 00:19:55,777 --> 00:20:00,115 Beth, John, 441 00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:03,368 all the way from Milwaukee. 442 00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:05,204 Beth, 443 00:20:05,287 --> 00:20:08,749 John, Big John, thanks for coming all the way from-- 444 00:20:08,832 --> 00:20:11,335 from Milwaukee. I love you. 445 00:20:11,418 --> 00:20:12,711 Hey, Papa John! 446 00:20:12,794 --> 00:20:14,588 Don't...say that. 447 00:20:15,714 --> 00:20:16,924 You got this. 448 00:20:21,094 --> 00:20:23,096 Hey, Ben, I'm really-- 449 00:20:26,642 --> 00:20:28,477 [stomach growling] 450 00:20:30,020 --> 00:20:31,021 [unzips zipper] 451 00:20:31,104 --> 00:20:32,856 [stomach growling] 452 00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:36,526 [grunting and groaning] 453 00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:37,819 Wonderful. 454 00:20:42,157 --> 00:20:43,700 [farting] 455 00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,035 [crack] 456 00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:48,956 [Abby] I'm not saying he was being nice. 457 00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:51,083 You're saying he was trying to make conversation, 458 00:20:51,166 --> 00:20:52,960 and I'm saying I don't think it was a good conversation. 459 00:20:53,043 --> 00:20:54,211 I agree. 460 00:20:54,294 --> 00:20:55,671 Okay, well maybe if somebody asked him a question, 461 00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:57,005 he wouldn't feel the need to discuss Adam. 462 00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:59,758 So, you're saying that Mom is not warm enough to Benjamin, 463 00:20:59,841 --> 00:21:03,387 and you're saying that Benjamin focuses on topics 464 00:21:03,470 --> 00:21:06,390 that are not really helpful in terms of the family dynamic. 465 00:21:06,473 --> 00:21:08,600 Why is he doing that? Why is he saying everything we're saying? 466 00:21:08,684 --> 00:21:11,186 It's that book. It tells him to narrate conversations. 467 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:14,147 Well, we wouldn't need a narrator if everybody would read the book. 468 00:21:14,231 --> 00:21:16,942 -N.V.C. Non-Violent Communication. -You should put Adam first. 469 00:21:17,025 --> 00:21:19,111 Adam is family. He's gonna be around forever. 470 00:21:19,194 --> 00:21:21,405 -Benjamin, we're not so sure. -What does that mean? 471 00:21:21,488 --> 00:21:23,365 Well, I mean, you're the one who said that, you know-- 472 00:21:23,448 --> 00:21:25,033 Ah! Not now. 473 00:21:25,117 --> 00:21:27,536 A couple of weeks ago, you said you were gonna break up with him. 474 00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:29,413 But I haven't found the right moment. 475 00:21:29,496 --> 00:21:31,832 It's tough to find the right moment when you're so far apart. 476 00:21:31,915 --> 00:21:33,292 He lives in Williamsburg. 477 00:21:33,375 --> 00:21:36,295 If you have to go over a bridge, it might as well be Jersey. 478 00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:39,089 Hey, where is Benjamin? I need to apologize to him. 479 00:21:39,172 --> 00:21:41,091 -For what? -Dad, please don't. 480 00:21:41,174 --> 00:21:43,385 He needs to know that I have things to say to him. 481 00:21:43,468 --> 00:21:45,137 He doesn't, and he's probably gonna be a while. 482 00:21:45,220 --> 00:21:46,763 Well, that's because he's hurting. 483 00:21:46,847 --> 00:21:49,933 -I think it's 'cause he has an issue. -Mmm. 484 00:21:50,517 --> 00:21:51,810 What issue? 485 00:21:51,893 --> 00:21:54,187 It's like a medical thing. What do you care? 486 00:21:54,271 --> 00:21:56,148 I don't care. I just didn't know he had an issue. 487 00:21:56,231 --> 00:21:57,858 It's just colitis. He's not dying. 488 00:21:58,775 --> 00:22:00,444 Yeah, what is that exactly? 489 00:22:00,527 --> 00:22:01,862 It's the reason he can't have dairy. 490 00:22:01,945 --> 00:22:05,073 [Ellen] Colitis makes the linings of your intestines all puffy. 491 00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:07,617 Doesn't the Meshbesher kid have that? What was his name? 492 00:22:07,701 --> 00:22:10,120 [Ellen] Going to the bathroom becomes a very dangerous thing. 493 00:22:10,203 --> 00:22:12,664 [Richard] Ron! Ron Meshbesher. Ron. That's his name. 494 00:22:12,748 --> 00:22:15,792 Wait, you said that the Rabbi said something funny about colitis, right? 495 00:22:15,876 --> 00:22:18,503 Oh, um, no, no, no. It was-- It was offensive, actually. 496 00:22:18,587 --> 00:22:20,005 -Oh. Okay. -Yeah. 497 00:22:20,088 --> 00:22:22,507 [tense music] 498 00:22:36,146 --> 00:22:37,397 [whispering] Benj... 499 00:22:40,609 --> 00:22:43,111 Buddy? 500 00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:45,030 How you doing in there? 501 00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:48,533 [knocking harder] 502 00:22:50,368 --> 00:22:51,995 [in normal voice] Hello? 503 00:22:53,497 --> 00:22:55,540 Benj! Ha-ha! 504 00:22:55,624 --> 00:22:57,834 Yeah. Yeah, that's great. That's-- yeah. 505 00:22:57,918 --> 00:23:00,504 No, that's very funny. 506 00:23:00,587 --> 00:23:02,631 Say nothing if you're okay? 507 00:23:02,714 --> 00:23:04,841 [tense music] 508 00:23:12,557 --> 00:23:14,434 Okay. 509 00:23:14,518 --> 00:23:16,561 [Abby] I feel like Mom knows I drove on Shabbos. 510 00:23:16,645 --> 00:23:17,979 [David] If she knew, you'd know. 511 00:23:18,063 --> 00:23:19,439 Yeah. 512 00:23:19,523 --> 00:23:21,399 Can't you just tell her that 513 00:23:21,483 --> 00:23:23,735 Benjamin drives and you're just, like, in the car and... 514 00:23:23,819 --> 00:23:26,488 [Abby and David] Umm... [laughter] 515 00:23:26,571 --> 00:23:28,198 You know, you could try, be like, 516 00:23:28,281 --> 00:23:30,158 "Hey, Mom, sometimes I get in the car on Shabbos." 517 00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:34,246 "Officer, sometimes I travel with a kilo in my carry-on." 518 00:23:34,329 --> 00:23:36,873 Well, whatever. I don't think it could be worse 519 00:23:36,957 --> 00:23:40,836 than her reaction to when David told her about our engagement. 520 00:23:40,919 --> 00:23:42,921 Oh, no. What'd she say? 521 00:23:43,004 --> 00:23:44,047 I told you what she said. 522 00:23:44,131 --> 00:23:45,549 No, you just told me that she disapproved. 523 00:23:45,632 --> 00:23:47,843 Oh! No, you can tell her. 524 00:23:47,926 --> 00:23:48,927 -Yeah? -Yeah. 525 00:23:49,010 --> 00:23:50,095 -You can say. -Do it! 526 00:23:50,512 --> 00:23:51,930 -Fine. -Tell her. 527 00:23:52,013 --> 00:23:54,516 [David] All right. It was after Grandpa died 528 00:23:54,599 --> 00:23:58,186 -and she was sitting Shiva and-- -Ho-ho! Perfect timing. 529 00:23:58,270 --> 00:24:00,897 I don't know. I thought now's as good a time as any. 530 00:24:00,981 --> 00:24:02,816 She'll never be more upset than she is right now. 531 00:24:02,899 --> 00:24:06,653 So I sat down next to her and I said, "Mom, 532 00:24:06,736 --> 00:24:08,280 I proposed to Meg and she said yes." 533 00:24:08,363 --> 00:24:10,490 -You're welcome. -Thank you. 534 00:24:10,574 --> 00:24:15,745 And she turned to me and did that blank stare that she does. 535 00:24:15,829 --> 00:24:17,080 Perfect. 536 00:24:17,164 --> 00:24:20,584 And just goes, "I just started mourning my father. 537 00:24:20,667 --> 00:24:22,460 Now I have to mourn my son." 538 00:24:26,798 --> 00:24:28,383 -Yeah. -Yeah. 539 00:24:28,466 --> 00:24:30,468 -Wow. -[Meg] Yeah, it's been a while, though. 540 00:24:30,552 --> 00:24:32,512 I'm pretty sure she loves me now. 541 00:24:32,596 --> 00:24:34,264 I mean, she has gotten better. 542 00:24:34,347 --> 00:24:36,433 She has, you know, I mean, ever since you started taking the classes. 543 00:24:36,516 --> 00:24:38,768 -Yeah, um... -You know I'm on your side, right? 544 00:24:38,852 --> 00:24:42,230 No, I know. I'd just like my parents there, too. 545 00:24:42,314 --> 00:24:43,648 [Abby] What do you mean? 546 00:24:43,732 --> 00:24:46,443 Well, they're just firmly Catholic, 547 00:24:46,526 --> 00:24:48,403 and I kind of want them to be 548 00:24:48,486 --> 00:24:50,071 on board with the whole conversion thing. 549 00:24:50,155 --> 00:24:53,074 -And they're just a little-- -Hey, yeah, that's sweet. 550 00:24:53,158 --> 00:24:55,285 That's really sweet. 551 00:24:55,368 --> 00:24:57,204 [voice cracking] David, can I talk to you for a minute? 552 00:24:57,287 --> 00:24:59,080 Sure, bud. 553 00:25:02,709 --> 00:25:03,919 Is he okay? 554 00:25:04,002 --> 00:25:06,504 Well, no, he's on pills and they're not working. 555 00:25:06,588 --> 00:25:07,505 Nice. 556 00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:10,884 He won't come out. 557 00:25:10,967 --> 00:25:12,219 Okay. 558 00:25:12,302 --> 00:25:14,346 He's been in there for many minutes. 559 00:25:14,429 --> 00:25:16,389 Okay. 560 00:25:16,473 --> 00:25:18,558 Benjamin, everything okay in there? 561 00:25:22,812 --> 00:25:23,939 Benj! 562 00:25:24,814 --> 00:25:26,691 You sure he's in there? 563 00:25:26,775 --> 00:25:28,276 Mm-hmm. 564 00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:29,653 -[rattles door knob] -Where's the key? 565 00:25:29,736 --> 00:25:31,488 -I don't know. -[rattles door knob] 566 00:25:31,571 --> 00:25:33,031 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! 567 00:25:33,114 --> 00:25:36,701 There's something I need to say. 568 00:25:36,785 --> 00:25:38,203 Okay. 569 00:25:41,623 --> 00:25:44,668 Benjamin took my laxatives. 570 00:25:45,710 --> 00:25:47,170 What do you mean? 571 00:25:47,254 --> 00:25:52,676 He asked me for a laxative, so I gave him one. 572 00:25:52,759 --> 00:25:55,011 Benjamin asked you for a laxative? 573 00:25:58,390 --> 00:26:00,350 -Did you slip him a laxative? -Shit! 574 00:26:00,433 --> 00:26:02,519 Did you actually do that? You know he has colitis! 575 00:26:02,602 --> 00:26:05,021 -Well, now I do! -Oh, God! 576 00:26:05,105 --> 00:26:06,314 Okay. Okay. So you gave him a laxative. 577 00:26:06,398 --> 00:26:07,607 -3. -3? 578 00:26:07,691 --> 00:26:09,192 -I gave him 3. -That's so many. 579 00:26:09,276 --> 00:26:10,652 I crushed it into a powder because, you know, 580 00:26:10,735 --> 00:26:12,028 you don't know how much he's gonna drink. 581 00:26:12,112 --> 00:26:13,530 Right, of course. Basic science! 582 00:26:13,613 --> 00:26:15,156 This was just supposed to make him shit. 583 00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:16,574 Why are you like this? 584 00:26:16,658 --> 00:26:18,243 Of course you pull this shit on the one night 585 00:26:18,326 --> 00:26:19,452 that Meg's parents are coming to town. 586 00:26:19,536 --> 00:26:21,121 You know what? He is such a prick to me! 587 00:26:21,204 --> 00:26:23,123 This was just a goof. I was just razzing him. 588 00:26:23,206 --> 00:26:24,291 Shush! 589 00:26:25,625 --> 00:26:27,877 Let's just find the key. 590 00:26:27,961 --> 00:26:29,462 [ding] 591 00:26:31,923 --> 00:26:33,008 Adam. 592 00:26:34,676 --> 00:26:36,761 [key turns in lock] 593 00:26:38,013 --> 00:26:39,431 Oh, God! Oh, God! 594 00:26:39,514 --> 00:26:41,933 [Adam] What? Oh, I smell it! 595 00:26:42,017 --> 00:26:43,268 All right, Benj, I'm coming in! 596 00:26:51,526 --> 00:26:52,902 Oh, God! 597 00:26:52,986 --> 00:26:54,279 No, no, no, no, no. 598 00:26:56,364 --> 00:26:57,615 -Does he have a pulse? -[Adam] No. 599 00:26:57,699 --> 00:27:00,410 -Adam, does he have a pulse! -No! 600 00:27:00,493 --> 00:27:03,121 Initiating compressions. 601 00:27:03,204 --> 00:27:05,749 Should I-- Should I do the mouth part, or-- 602 00:27:05,832 --> 00:27:07,834 -No, that's obsolete! -Yeah. 603 00:27:07,917 --> 00:27:11,046 Don't worry. I never lose a man. 604 00:27:11,129 --> 00:27:12,339 [bone snaps] 605 00:27:17,052 --> 00:27:18,553 He's a goner. 606 00:27:20,221 --> 00:27:21,389 Okay. 607 00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:24,267 Okay. 608 00:27:24,351 --> 00:27:25,560 Wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait. 609 00:27:25,643 --> 00:27:27,020 What? 610 00:27:27,103 --> 00:27:29,522 We have to...discuss. 611 00:27:29,606 --> 00:27:30,565 There's nothing to discuss. 612 00:27:30,648 --> 00:27:32,150 Wait! Wait! 613 00:27:33,777 --> 00:27:36,112 I just want to make sure you don't do anything stupid. 614 00:27:36,196 --> 00:27:37,364 Me? 615 00:27:37,447 --> 00:27:39,657 Okay, Okay, he's toast, Okay? 616 00:27:39,741 --> 00:27:41,951 There's absolutely no chance of him surviving. 617 00:27:42,035 --> 00:27:43,953 Look, I understand, and I'm here for you. 618 00:27:44,037 --> 00:27:46,039 And I love you. 619 00:27:46,122 --> 00:27:48,041 You're my brother. But right now we got to call an ambulance. 620 00:27:48,124 --> 00:27:50,502 [whispering] No, no, no, no. David, David, David, David, David... 621 00:27:50,585 --> 00:27:54,172 Look...he's been in there for well over 8 minutes. 622 00:27:54,255 --> 00:27:55,173 He's toast. 623 00:27:55,256 --> 00:27:56,674 Stop saying that. Nobody says that. 624 00:27:56,758 --> 00:27:57,675 But he is! 625 00:27:57,759 --> 00:27:59,969 We're not just gonna leave a dead body in there. 626 00:28:00,053 --> 00:28:02,263 Use your head! As soon as they do the bloodwork, 627 00:28:02,347 --> 00:28:03,556 it's gonna be obvious what happened to him. 628 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,308 Why? 629 00:28:05,392 --> 00:28:07,477 Because he has a prescription laxative in his system 630 00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:09,813 and there's only one person in this house who can't take a shit! 631 00:28:09,896 --> 00:28:11,147 Well, hopefully they don't check for that. 632 00:28:11,231 --> 00:28:12,899 Hopefully?! 633 00:28:12,982 --> 00:28:15,026 Get out of my way. 634 00:28:15,110 --> 00:28:16,694 Adam, stop! Stop it! 635 00:28:23,576 --> 00:28:24,494 This is nice. 636 00:28:25,829 --> 00:28:27,122 Yes. 637 00:28:27,205 --> 00:28:29,374 -No, no! -That's great, I'm gonna go to Rikers. 638 00:28:29,457 --> 00:28:32,001 -Rikers is closing. -A different jail then! 639 00:28:32,085 --> 00:28:35,505 -Yeah. -Look, this was an accident, okay? 640 00:28:37,132 --> 00:28:40,260 I can handle warfare. We both know that, 641 00:28:40,343 --> 00:28:41,553 but not jail. 642 00:28:41,636 --> 00:28:43,638 I can't do jail. I won't get a gun. 643 00:28:43,722 --> 00:28:45,724 [Benjamin passes gas] 644 00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:48,935 Look... 645 00:28:50,395 --> 00:28:54,524 make any call you want to, but he is dead. 646 00:28:55,316 --> 00:28:57,026 So, if you make this decision, 647 00:28:57,110 --> 00:28:59,738 you are just rolling the dice with my life. 648 00:29:01,281 --> 00:29:04,325 Meg, your parents know it's for 7:00? 649 00:29:04,409 --> 00:29:05,535 Yeah, yeah, they're on their way. 650 00:29:05,618 --> 00:29:08,246 Okay. It's-- Okay. 651 00:29:08,329 --> 00:29:11,541 [loud crunching] 652 00:29:11,624 --> 00:29:13,877 Abby, can you wait for dinner? 653 00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:18,339 Oh, no, it's seaweed. It's not real food. 654 00:29:20,592 --> 00:29:22,302 How come you let her eat something, but not me? 655 00:29:22,385 --> 00:29:23,928 [Ellen] She's not eating the dinner. 656 00:29:24,012 --> 00:29:25,972 -It's for the guests. -It's a technical difference. 657 00:29:26,055 --> 00:29:27,599 -Abby? -Yeah? 658 00:29:27,682 --> 00:29:29,809 Can we have a quick sibling conference? 659 00:29:29,893 --> 00:29:32,562 For what? 660 00:29:32,645 --> 00:29:36,149 [whispering] It's a surprise. 661 00:29:36,232 --> 00:29:37,817 [Abby] Okay. 662 00:29:42,906 --> 00:29:44,157 [whispering] They're very close. 663 00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:45,575 -I know. -So nice. 664 00:29:45,658 --> 00:29:47,160 They really love each other. 665 00:29:47,243 --> 00:29:50,872 -Uh, uh, um... -What are you doing? 666 00:29:50,955 --> 00:29:53,333 What's a sibling conference? What's wrong with him? 667 00:29:53,416 --> 00:29:54,793 Hello. 668 00:29:54,876 --> 00:29:57,378 Before we continue, I think it's important for you to remember 669 00:29:57,462 --> 00:29:59,631 you've been trying to find the right way to break up with Benjamin-- 670 00:29:59,714 --> 00:30:01,299 Shhh! Shush it! 671 00:30:01,382 --> 00:30:04,093 [Adam] Don't worry. He can't hear us. 672 00:30:04,928 --> 00:30:06,721 How do you know? 673 00:30:06,805 --> 00:30:08,181 Uh... 674 00:30:09,182 --> 00:30:10,809 [Abby, whispering] Is it a turd? 675 00:30:12,268 --> 00:30:13,978 God, it does stink-- 676 00:30:21,361 --> 00:30:24,739 Is he-- Is he dead? 677 00:30:24,823 --> 00:30:27,951 No. No, he's not dead. 678 00:30:28,034 --> 00:30:30,203 Hey. Hey, Beej? 679 00:30:30,286 --> 00:30:32,956 Okay, so he is dead, but I just really don't want you to scream. 680 00:30:33,039 --> 00:30:35,542 -[Abby screams] -Shush! 681 00:30:35,625 --> 00:30:37,877 Uh, hey, is everything okay? 682 00:30:37,961 --> 00:30:39,462 Everything's good, everything's great. 683 00:30:39,546 --> 00:30:40,964 -Hey! -Hi! 684 00:30:43,883 --> 00:30:45,927 Dad, could I bother you for a quick chat? 685 00:30:46,010 --> 00:30:47,595 Well, yeah, sure. 686 00:30:47,679 --> 00:30:51,140 [David, whispering] Great. Be right back. 687 00:30:51,224 --> 00:30:52,684 I love you. 688 00:30:52,767 --> 00:30:54,394 Okay. 689 00:31:02,193 --> 00:31:05,822 So, David tells me you're going to share a d'var Torah. 690 00:31:05,905 --> 00:31:09,284 -Uh-huh. Yep, it's from class. -Oh good. Good. 691 00:31:11,703 --> 00:31:13,496 Yeah, it's good. 692 00:31:16,749 --> 00:31:18,334 You know, I actually, 693 00:31:18,418 --> 00:31:21,254 I mostly learned about the New Testament growing up, 694 00:31:21,337 --> 00:31:25,216 so it has been really cool reading up on the Torah. 695 00:31:25,300 --> 00:31:28,928 It's like the prequel. 696 00:31:29,012 --> 00:31:31,222 Well, I don't know if it's the prequel. 697 00:31:31,306 --> 00:31:34,058 -It's the main one. -Right, no yeah, I-- 698 00:31:34,142 --> 00:31:38,062 That's-- That's what I meant, um...you know, 699 00:31:38,980 --> 00:31:44,027 Judaism is, um... well, it's something that 700 00:31:44,110 --> 00:31:47,196 I have always wanted to find out more about. 701 00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:49,616 You know, like the culture 702 00:31:49,699 --> 00:31:56,080 and the TV shows of people just living in New York...City. 703 00:31:57,832 --> 00:31:59,417 Yeah. 704 00:31:59,500 --> 00:32:04,047 Look, Meg, we appreciate you taking the classes 705 00:32:04,756 --> 00:32:08,885 and clearly you're very bright and kind. 706 00:32:08,968 --> 00:32:10,595 I feel like there's a "but" coming. 707 00:32:10,678 --> 00:32:16,267 "And" it's...it's like I have this houseplant 708 00:32:16,351 --> 00:32:18,978 that was given to me by my mother 709 00:32:19,062 --> 00:32:22,106 that she got from her mother 710 00:32:22,190 --> 00:32:24,901 in Germany, who received it from her mother, 711 00:32:24,984 --> 00:32:28,404 who was given it by her mother, and so on 712 00:32:28,488 --> 00:32:31,074 for a hundred generations. 713 00:32:31,157 --> 00:32:32,408 That's a long time. 714 00:32:32,492 --> 00:32:34,619 And now it feels like... 715 00:32:37,330 --> 00:32:39,499 like I'm handing this houseplant over 716 00:32:39,582 --> 00:32:42,418 to someone who took an online course in gardening. 717 00:32:47,173 --> 00:32:49,133 The classes are in person. 718 00:32:52,470 --> 00:32:54,138 [running footsteps] 719 00:33:00,436 --> 00:33:02,188 -[praying in Hebrew] -Dad, Dad, Dad! 720 00:33:02,271 --> 00:33:04,482 [Praying continues] -Dad, please stop mumbling. 721 00:33:04,565 --> 00:33:06,192 [David] He's not mumbling, he's praying. 722 00:33:06,275 --> 00:33:08,194 -I don't care! Stop it! -Will you stop yelling! 723 00:33:08,277 --> 00:33:10,196 Oh, great. Let's do your thing then. 724 00:33:10,279 --> 00:33:12,365 I'm gonna stop yelling if you do something 725 00:33:12,448 --> 00:33:14,993 about your son murdering my boyfriend! 726 00:33:15,076 --> 00:33:17,120 Can we please just, please be quiet! 727 00:33:17,203 --> 00:33:19,580 [Richard] You know, in Korea, they respect their elders. 728 00:33:19,664 --> 00:33:20,832 Then move to Korea! 729 00:33:20,915 --> 00:33:23,042 [Adam] Look, Abby, I told you this was a harmless accident. 730 00:33:23,126 --> 00:33:25,211 -[David] Dad? -[Abby] Harmless? Harmless?! 731 00:33:25,294 --> 00:33:27,171 We need to do something before Meg's parents get here. 732 00:33:27,255 --> 00:33:29,549 Oh, because what could be more important than Meg's parents? 733 00:33:29,632 --> 00:33:31,009 -Abby wants to betray us. -[Abby] Me?! 734 00:33:31,092 --> 00:33:32,510 You didn't mean to do it, right? 735 00:33:32,593 --> 00:33:34,387 -No, of course not. -Stop doing that! 736 00:33:34,470 --> 00:33:36,681 -What? -Protecting him! 737 00:33:36,764 --> 00:33:39,350 I did everything I could to get you that job! 738 00:33:39,434 --> 00:33:41,436 -It was an unpaid internship! -I don't care what it was! 739 00:33:41,519 --> 00:33:45,023 He was my boyfriend and now he's dead! 740 00:33:45,106 --> 00:33:46,858 Weren't you gonna break up with him? 741 00:33:46,941 --> 00:33:48,568 Maybe! 742 00:33:48,651 --> 00:33:51,946 I'm definitely not gonna pretend like it didn't happen! 743 00:33:52,030 --> 00:33:54,490 Like, just some spoiled, manipulative-- 744 00:33:54,574 --> 00:33:56,159 Benjamin cheated on you! 745 00:33:58,369 --> 00:34:00,538 You think I quit because of PowerPoint? 746 00:34:00,621 --> 00:34:03,499 I quit because he was gallivanting around 747 00:34:03,583 --> 00:34:05,752 making a cuck out of my sister with some blonde at the-- 748 00:34:05,835 --> 00:34:07,503 Okay, that's enough! 749 00:34:13,718 --> 00:34:15,386 Oh, my God, you knew. 750 00:34:18,139 --> 00:34:19,891 And you stayed with him. 751 00:34:21,350 --> 00:34:23,811 I RSVP'd to a wedding. 752 00:34:23,895 --> 00:34:26,272 Abby...please. 753 00:34:28,691 --> 00:34:30,151 What's Mom gonna say? 754 00:34:30,234 --> 00:34:32,445 She won't mind. 755 00:34:32,528 --> 00:34:34,822 -How‘s that? -We won't tell her. 756 00:34:34,906 --> 00:34:36,449 What the hell is going on? 757 00:34:36,532 --> 00:34:39,827 [prayer resumes] 758 00:34:48,586 --> 00:34:50,838 [running footsteps] 759 00:34:56,302 --> 00:34:58,846 [murmured shouting] 760 00:34:58,930 --> 00:35:00,431 There's nothing really to see. 761 00:35:00,515 --> 00:35:01,474 Aaah! 762 00:35:01,557 --> 00:35:02,934 Okay, Mom... 763 00:35:03,017 --> 00:35:04,560 -Oh, my God! Oh, my God! -Mom! It's okay! 764 00:35:04,644 --> 00:35:06,312 Shh! Shh! 765 00:35:06,395 --> 00:35:07,814 Oh, that poor boy! 766 00:35:07,897 --> 00:35:09,607 Mom, we need to talk about this. 767 00:35:09,690 --> 00:35:11,776 -Oh, my God, that poor boy. -Let's just talk about it. 768 00:35:11,859 --> 00:35:12,944 What did you do? 769 00:35:13,027 --> 00:35:14,153 Do you want a Klonopin? 770 00:35:14,237 --> 00:35:16,697 [distant frantic voices] 771 00:35:16,781 --> 00:35:17,782 [message sent notification] 772 00:35:17,865 --> 00:35:20,326 [frantic voices continue] 773 00:35:20,409 --> 00:35:22,203 [Ellen] What happened exactly? You did what? 774 00:35:22,286 --> 00:35:24,747 [Adam] No, exactly. Now I do one prank and I'm the bad guy. 775 00:35:24,831 --> 00:35:27,208 Yes! You literally just murdered someone. 776 00:35:27,291 --> 00:35:28,709 I wasn't trying to murder him. 777 00:35:28,793 --> 00:35:30,128 There are more efficient ways of doing that. 778 00:35:30,211 --> 00:35:32,213 -Get out of my face. -Okay, I think we just all agree 779 00:35:32,296 --> 00:35:33,506 that what Adam did was a freak accident. 780 00:35:33,589 --> 00:35:35,883 And now we are all covering up a murder, which is against the law! 781 00:35:35,967 --> 00:35:36,968 Not if you do it well. 782 00:35:37,051 --> 00:35:39,428 [Abby] Oh, my God, you are so creepy. 783 00:35:39,512 --> 00:35:42,181 Truly, I think he has to face the consequences of his actions. 784 00:35:42,265 --> 00:35:43,891 So, what, we just accept that Adam goes to jail? 785 00:35:43,975 --> 00:35:45,852 Abby wants me to get rammed in the ass! 786 00:35:45,935 --> 00:35:47,770 Stop saying that. It's homophobic! 787 00:35:47,854 --> 00:35:50,022 -No, it's not! -It kinda is. 788 00:35:50,106 --> 00:35:52,191 You should care for your brothers half as much as you care 789 00:35:52,275 --> 00:35:53,276 about policing our speech. 790 00:35:53,359 --> 00:35:54,569 Oh, are you serious right now? 791 00:35:54,652 --> 00:35:56,028 [crying] I don't know what I am. 792 00:35:56,112 --> 00:35:58,447 Abby, I just want to say I don't blame you at all for being upset. 793 00:35:58,531 --> 00:36:00,533 -I mean this is horrific. -Aw, thank you so much for understanding. 794 00:36:00,616 --> 00:36:02,410 I'm really very sorry. 795 00:36:02,493 --> 00:36:04,453 Okay, What he did was stupid, but it was an accident. 796 00:36:04,537 --> 00:36:06,455 His life should be ruined because of an accident? 797 00:36:06,539 --> 00:36:09,000 Mom, I could give a shit! Now it's about being practical, okay? 798 00:36:09,083 --> 00:36:11,210 We got to either come up with a plan, or call this in 799 00:36:11,294 --> 00:36:12,336 because then we're all screwed. 800 00:36:12,420 --> 00:36:13,963 Okay, then let's come with a plan. 801 00:36:14,046 --> 00:36:15,631 -Fine! -Okay, the plan... 802 00:36:18,968 --> 00:36:22,638 I don't have a plan, but I do know 803 00:36:22,722 --> 00:36:27,393 that we're all gonna figure this out because everyone here is family. 804 00:36:27,476 --> 00:36:28,644 [gasp] 805 00:36:31,189 --> 00:36:32,565 Is he dead? 806 00:36:33,816 --> 00:36:35,401 My daughter! 807 00:36:36,903 --> 00:36:38,779 [glasses clink] 808 00:36:38,863 --> 00:36:40,948 -Uh... -Meg! 809 00:36:41,032 --> 00:36:42,241 -Hey, hey! -Meg! 810 00:36:42,325 --> 00:36:44,243 [Abby] Meg, I just, I need you to trust us! 811 00:36:44,327 --> 00:36:46,621 Just give us two minutes to explain. Please. 812 00:36:46,704 --> 00:36:48,789 [Abby] He's my boyfriend, and if there's any chance he'd be okay, 813 00:36:48,873 --> 00:36:50,833 I promise you, we would have already called an ambulance by now. 814 00:36:50,917 --> 00:36:52,168 Just don't do anything sudden. 815 00:36:52,251 --> 00:36:53,961 [David] It was a freak accident and now Adam is implicated. 816 00:36:54,045 --> 00:36:55,254 -Don't tell her that! -Well, it's true. 817 00:36:55,338 --> 00:36:56,756 Don't do anything sudden, please. 818 00:36:56,839 --> 00:36:58,007 We just need one minute to explain. 819 00:36:58,090 --> 00:36:59,383 Aw, shit! 820 00:36:59,467 --> 00:37:00,718 -Aw, shit, shit, shit! -Say something! 821 00:37:00,801 --> 00:37:01,886 Meg! 822 00:37:03,804 --> 00:37:06,140 I love you, and this is your choice. 823 00:37:06,224 --> 00:37:07,600 -How could you!? -What!? 824 00:37:07,683 --> 00:37:09,101 Meg, please don't call the police. 825 00:37:09,185 --> 00:37:11,312 I'm calling my parents... 826 00:37:11,395 --> 00:37:12,438 -[ringing] -to cancel. 827 00:37:12,521 --> 00:37:13,564 [Ellen] Oh, thank God. 828 00:37:15,441 --> 00:37:18,152 [ringing continues] 829 00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:19,612 [recording] Hello, this is John. 830 00:37:19,695 --> 00:37:21,781 Shit. He's not answering, 831 00:37:21,864 --> 00:37:23,741 but we texted earlier and they said that they were running late. 832 00:37:23,824 --> 00:37:25,785 Right. So we should just assume that they're coming any minute now. 833 00:37:25,868 --> 00:37:27,954 -Oh, yeah. -Can we think of an idea, 834 00:37:28,037 --> 00:37:30,539 just anything, anything that could possibly save Adam? 835 00:37:30,623 --> 00:37:32,166 -Thanks, Mom. -Okay, so, 836 00:37:32,250 --> 00:37:33,501 if they find Benjamin's body here, 837 00:37:33,584 --> 00:37:34,585 that's an obvious connection to Adam. 838 00:37:34,669 --> 00:37:38,172 You need to move Benjamin to his apartment, right? 839 00:37:38,256 --> 00:37:42,760 You know, give him one of those New York deaths. 840 00:37:42,843 --> 00:37:44,679 Okay. 841 00:37:45,721 --> 00:37:46,681 What is that? 842 00:37:46,764 --> 00:37:50,601 You know, somebody dies in their apartment, 843 00:37:50,685 --> 00:37:52,687 and then they just lay there for a couple of days 844 00:37:52,770 --> 00:37:55,022 until somebody else smells the body, 845 00:37:55,106 --> 00:37:57,108 and then they call the landlord and they find him. 846 00:37:57,191 --> 00:37:58,526 [Ellen] Uhh! 847 00:37:58,609 --> 00:38:00,820 So, we just drive Benjamin to his apartment and leave him there? 848 00:38:00,903 --> 00:38:02,905 Yeah! That's the plan. 849 00:38:02,989 --> 00:38:04,699 Can you go downstairs and change out of your murder pants? 850 00:38:04,782 --> 00:38:07,285 -Well, what car do you plan on using? -Benjamin's. 851 00:38:07,368 --> 00:38:09,996 It's all the way in Brooklyn! 852 00:38:10,079 --> 00:38:12,164 [Ellen gasps] 853 00:38:12,248 --> 00:38:13,916 You drove here? 854 00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:16,002 How is this worse than murder? 855 00:38:16,085 --> 00:38:18,379 -Oh... -[David] Mom, lock it up. 856 00:38:18,462 --> 00:38:20,464 If we're gonna do something, we need to do it immediately. 857 00:38:20,548 --> 00:38:22,758 -Where are his keys? -I'll get them. 858 00:38:22,842 --> 00:38:25,303 -Thank you. Okay. Okay. -Okay. Okay. 859 00:38:25,386 --> 00:38:26,554 [Meg gasps] No, not okay. 860 00:38:26,637 --> 00:38:29,056 We cannot move Benjamin to his car. 861 00:38:29,140 --> 00:38:31,017 What? Why not? 862 00:38:31,100 --> 00:38:32,768 Curry. 863 00:38:36,439 --> 00:38:38,149 -Hey Jordan! -Oh, shi-- bruh! 864 00:38:38,232 --> 00:38:39,734 -Sorry. -Yo, are you good? 865 00:38:39,817 --> 00:38:41,819 You're looking kind of bad right now. 866 00:38:41,902 --> 00:38:44,196 No, I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. 867 00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:47,908 Could you maybe um, do me a fav-- a little-- it's just a little favor? 868 00:38:47,992 --> 00:38:49,410 -Yeah? -It's kind of a huge one. 869 00:38:49,493 --> 00:38:50,703 Okay... 870 00:38:50,786 --> 00:38:52,496 Could you maybe just delete 871 00:38:52,580 --> 00:38:54,749 all the lobby footage for the rest of the night? 872 00:38:56,083 --> 00:38:57,710 -Delete the footage? -Uh-huh. 873 00:39:00,379 --> 00:39:03,299 Aw shit, what's going on? 874 00:39:03,382 --> 00:39:05,176 What's going... 875 00:39:05,259 --> 00:39:06,302 Nothing. 876 00:39:06,385 --> 00:39:09,138 Obviously it's not nothing, you're asking me to delete the foot-- 877 00:39:09,221 --> 00:39:11,098 It's just something that I really can't get into right now, 878 00:39:11,182 --> 00:39:12,224 so it's really hard to explain. 879 00:39:12,308 --> 00:39:13,976 -Come on, you could tell me. -I really can't. 880 00:39:14,060 --> 00:39:15,770 Yes, you can. Look at you, man. 881 00:39:15,853 --> 00:39:18,814 -Obviously, you need my help. -No, believe me... 882 00:39:18,898 --> 00:39:20,274 please. 883 00:39:21,776 --> 00:39:23,903 This is something that you can't help with. 884 00:39:23,986 --> 00:39:26,030 Okay, Jordan, this is um... 885 00:39:28,366 --> 00:39:30,326 [whispering] This is as bad as it gets. 886 00:39:30,409 --> 00:39:32,745 -Is Richie okay? -Oh, yeah, he's fine. 887 00:39:32,828 --> 00:39:36,040 Oh, my God. Look, bro, I don't know what this is, 888 00:39:36,123 --> 00:39:37,750 but I know you need my help. 889 00:39:37,833 --> 00:39:41,128 I mean, you're basically asking me to... 890 00:39:41,212 --> 00:39:44,173 Don't you think it's suspicious if Friday's footage just disappeared? 891 00:39:47,676 --> 00:39:50,179 You should ask me to delete the whole drive. 892 00:39:50,262 --> 00:39:52,640 -Is that possible? -Yes. 893 00:39:52,723 --> 00:39:56,602 David, you guys, the Gelfands, you're family, bro. 894 00:39:56,685 --> 00:39:59,105 Richie talks to me about real shit. 895 00:39:59,188 --> 00:40:01,649 Richie talks to me about Jewish shit, bro. 896 00:40:01,732 --> 00:40:03,692 -You know I been here 15 years. -Mm-hmm. 897 00:40:03,776 --> 00:40:07,196 And there's only one apartment I rock with... 898 00:40:07,279 --> 00:40:08,739 10B. 899 00:40:10,491 --> 00:40:12,451 You'll do it? You'll delete the footage? 900 00:40:12,535 --> 00:40:13,786 Absolutely. 901 00:40:14,703 --> 00:40:17,164 -Jordan, thank you so much. -No, no problem, bruh. 902 00:40:17,248 --> 00:40:18,624 -Thank you. -[Jordan] All right, now, 903 00:40:18,707 --> 00:40:20,709 let me upstairs to help you fix this. 904 00:40:24,755 --> 00:40:27,550 Don't look at me like that, brother. We're family, right? 905 00:40:28,676 --> 00:40:31,011 Can't be nothing I haven't seen before. 906 00:40:32,012 --> 00:40:33,139 Jordan-- 907 00:40:33,222 --> 00:40:35,683 And now that I'm involved in whatever this is, 908 00:40:35,766 --> 00:40:38,227 I got to make sure you don't mess it up. 909 00:40:39,061 --> 00:40:40,896 -[cell phone ringing] -[Meg] They're not picking up. 910 00:40:40,980 --> 00:40:42,189 [recording] Hello, this is John. 911 00:40:42,273 --> 00:40:43,774 I should go down and wait for them, right? 912 00:40:43,858 --> 00:40:47,611 -[door opens] -What's popping, 10B? 913 00:40:47,695 --> 00:40:51,782 Jordan, you're here. Why are you here? 914 00:40:51,866 --> 00:40:53,492 He's gonna help us. 915 00:40:53,576 --> 00:40:54,994 That's right. I'm gonna help you guys. 916 00:40:55,077 --> 00:40:57,746 -David? -Jordan, I think we should go. 917 00:40:57,830 --> 00:41:00,332 Uh, no, we're not going anywhere. 918 00:41:00,416 --> 00:41:01,667 We're not going anywhere. 919 00:41:02,835 --> 00:41:04,795 What are you doing here? 920 00:41:04,879 --> 00:41:07,214 [Jordan] Adam, hi. Skipping leg day, I see. 921 00:41:07,298 --> 00:41:09,800 Meg... how's it going so far? 922 00:41:10,676 --> 00:41:11,969 -Could be better. -All right. 923 00:41:12,052 --> 00:41:14,388 -I'm gonna get you out of this. -He's gonna get us out. 924 00:41:14,472 --> 00:41:16,432 You know Pulp Fiction, the guy with the suit? 925 00:41:16,515 --> 00:41:17,933 The guy with the suit-- Sam Jackson. 926 00:41:18,017 --> 00:41:19,477 -The White one. -John Travolta? 927 00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:21,729 -Nope, the one with the mustache. -Mario. 928 00:41:21,812 --> 00:41:23,063 The Wolf. 929 00:41:23,147 --> 00:41:24,690 Bingo. The Wolf. 930 00:41:26,066 --> 00:41:27,276 I'm your wolf, baby. 931 00:41:27,359 --> 00:41:28,694 We are so fucked. 932 00:41:28,777 --> 00:41:32,198 Now... show me what's up. 933 00:41:34,867 --> 00:41:37,036 What could be the big deal? 934 00:41:37,119 --> 00:41:38,913 All right. Why is he on his back? 935 00:41:38,996 --> 00:41:40,831 You gotta roll him on his side, bruh. 936 00:41:42,291 --> 00:41:43,751 You gotta roll him on his side. 937 00:41:50,424 --> 00:41:51,509 He's toast. 938 00:41:51,592 --> 00:41:53,260 Uh-huh. Big time. 939 00:41:53,344 --> 00:41:55,387 Why didn't anyone say he's dead? 940 00:41:56,096 --> 00:41:57,932 Well, Jordan... 941 00:41:58,015 --> 00:41:59,058 I implied. 942 00:41:59,141 --> 00:42:01,227 How, David? Hmm? How? 943 00:42:02,019 --> 00:42:03,395 When you said you needed help-- 944 00:42:03,479 --> 00:42:06,649 I was very stern with how I said that we needed help. 945 00:42:06,732 --> 00:42:08,526 I'm a freaking doorman. 946 00:42:08,609 --> 00:42:11,737 Help to me? Changing a light bulb. 947 00:42:11,820 --> 00:42:13,739 Finding Richard's Orthotics upstairs. 948 00:42:14,532 --> 00:42:16,367 I don't do dead body, David. 949 00:42:16,450 --> 00:42:17,910 Oh, God, I just, I-- 950 00:42:18,786 --> 00:42:20,788 I thought, you know, you were so insistent-- 951 00:42:20,871 --> 00:42:22,122 -Nu-uh-hh. -You just-- 952 00:42:22,206 --> 00:42:23,874 Never imply dead. 953 00:42:23,958 --> 00:42:26,043 Never imply dead. 954 00:42:26,126 --> 00:42:29,755 You say dead. You don't imply it. Okay? 955 00:42:29,838 --> 00:42:31,632 -Yeah. -Now I'm dead. Dead to rights. 956 00:42:31,715 --> 00:42:34,093 Fingerprints everywhere, David. 957 00:42:36,136 --> 00:42:38,180 I, uh... 958 00:42:38,264 --> 00:42:39,682 I touched his neck, didn't I? 959 00:42:39,765 --> 00:42:40,933 -You touched him all over. -Shit! 960 00:42:41,016 --> 00:42:42,685 [Ellen] Jordan, I'm so sorry. 961 00:42:42,768 --> 00:42:44,979 You should go back downstairs. We won't involve you. 962 00:42:45,062 --> 00:42:46,772 You better believe I'm involved. 963 00:42:46,855 --> 00:42:50,442 We're across the Red Sea, and there's no turning back now, Ellen. 964 00:42:50,526 --> 00:42:52,736 I have a soluti-- oh, Jordan! 965 00:42:52,820 --> 00:42:54,697 Ha-ha! Richard, what's happening? 966 00:42:54,780 --> 00:42:56,073 What it do? 967 00:42:56,156 --> 00:42:57,825 Oh, you know, I'm trying to be like you, pimp. 968 00:42:57,908 --> 00:42:59,243 [Richard] Oh, say less! 969 00:43:00,452 --> 00:43:01,662 Salute! 970 00:43:01,745 --> 00:43:03,414 Yeah, but things are bad. 971 00:43:03,497 --> 00:43:05,457 Hey, don't worry about it, my guy. 972 00:43:05,541 --> 00:43:07,918 -I'm gonna take care of this. -No, no, that's not necessary. 973 00:43:08,002 --> 00:43:10,129 I know exactly what to do. 974 00:43:10,212 --> 00:43:12,840 O.F.N.R. 975 00:43:12,923 --> 00:43:14,675 Is that like a medical term? 976 00:43:14,758 --> 00:43:16,510 -No. -It's his stupid book. 977 00:43:16,594 --> 00:43:19,763 O-, we observe that there is a body. 978 00:43:19,847 --> 00:43:23,017 F, we feel panic and tension. 979 00:43:23,100 --> 00:43:25,060 Richard! Enough! 980 00:43:25,144 --> 00:43:26,228 [Jordan] Okay, hold on now. 981 00:43:26,312 --> 00:43:28,397 Let him finish. Richie, go ahead. 982 00:43:28,480 --> 00:43:29,982 Thank you, Jordan. 983 00:43:30,065 --> 00:43:32,735 R, I request... 984 00:43:32,818 --> 00:43:35,571 Look, the Talmud has these laws. 985 00:43:35,654 --> 00:43:37,615 Talmud's always got something to say. 986 00:43:37,698 --> 00:43:41,076 So, it's forbidden to carry a dead body on Shabbos. 987 00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:43,162 But the Talmud also says 988 00:43:43,245 --> 00:43:47,082 that it's okay to carry an infant or a loaf of bread. 989 00:43:47,166 --> 00:43:50,210 So, if we put a loaf of bread on the body, then it's okay, 990 00:43:50,294 --> 00:43:51,920 because the body works like a platter. 991 00:43:52,004 --> 00:43:54,757 -Platter? -Doesn't that make sense? 992 00:43:54,840 --> 00:43:56,884 -Thank you, Richard. -You're welcome. 993 00:43:56,967 --> 00:43:58,844 At this point, 911 isn't an option. 994 00:43:58,927 --> 00:44:00,679 Certainly not. We've already crossed the sea. 995 00:44:00,763 --> 00:44:03,599 -Exactly. -So does anyone have any bread? 996 00:44:03,682 --> 00:44:05,184 No one's getting any bread, Dad! 997 00:44:05,267 --> 00:44:06,352 What, you got an infant? 998 00:44:06,435 --> 00:44:08,520 Okay, hold on. No one's getting bread or an infant. 999 00:44:08,604 --> 00:44:10,105 -People, can we... -Shit. 1000 00:44:10,189 --> 00:44:11,899 Someone needs to go downstairs before my parents get here. 1001 00:44:11,982 --> 00:44:13,525 Hold on one minute, can we make a plan? 1002 00:44:13,609 --> 00:44:14,985 Oh, we already have one of those. Yeah. 1003 00:44:15,069 --> 00:44:16,904 We're gonna take his body, we're gonna put it in his car. 1004 00:44:16,987 --> 00:44:18,447 We're gonna take him back to his apartment 1005 00:44:18,530 --> 00:44:19,990 and we're just going to leave it-- 1006 00:44:20,074 --> 00:44:21,533 -we're gonna leave him there. -A New York death. 1007 00:44:21,617 --> 00:44:24,995 Yeah, that's plan "A," but we need to get "B" and "C" working. 1008 00:44:25,079 --> 00:44:26,580 I think we should focus on "A." 1009 00:44:26,664 --> 00:44:28,374 No, no, no, no. We only have time for one plan. 1010 00:44:28,457 --> 00:44:30,793 Okay, I'll think as we go, all right? 1011 00:44:30,876 --> 00:44:33,337 But I need you all to follow my lead, no hesitation. 1012 00:44:33,420 --> 00:44:35,589 Are we on the same page? 1, 2, 3, all eyes on me. 1013 00:44:35,673 --> 00:44:37,841 -Uh-huh. -Ellen, do you have any rugs? 1014 00:44:37,925 --> 00:44:40,135 Uh...Abby's getting the comforter. 1015 00:44:40,219 --> 00:44:41,595 -Comforter's great! -I'll go get it. 1016 00:44:41,679 --> 00:44:43,430 -Thanks, Mom. -[Jordan] Guys, huddle up, 1017 00:44:43,514 --> 00:44:46,975 let me quarterback this. Richard, you are entirely too close. 1018 00:44:47,059 --> 00:44:48,769 No I'm fucking. You know I love my guy. 1019 00:44:48,852 --> 00:44:50,896 Anyway, watch this. All right, when they come back, 1020 00:44:50,979 --> 00:44:53,399 we're gonna wrap the body in the comforter. Then... 1021 00:44:53,482 --> 00:44:56,402 the luggage cart won't work, obviously, because you can see right through it. 1022 00:44:56,485 --> 00:44:58,904 So, I'll have to go next door and get the garbage cart. 1023 00:44:58,987 --> 00:45:00,239 -Then, David-- -Yeah? 1024 00:45:00,322 --> 00:45:02,866 you and me are gonna put the body in and bring it to his car, 1025 00:45:02,950 --> 00:45:04,410 -[car alarm beeps] -After that, 1026 00:45:04,493 --> 00:45:06,453 I can't leave the building, so it's gonna have to be Meg-- 1027 00:45:06,537 --> 00:45:07,955 -Me. -and David who drive him back 1028 00:45:08,038 --> 00:45:09,873 and carry him into his apartment. 1029 00:45:09,957 --> 00:45:10,958 Touchdown. 1030 00:45:11,041 --> 00:45:12,167 Okay. -Yeah? 1031 00:45:12,251 --> 00:45:13,460 What am I supposed to do? 1032 00:45:15,254 --> 00:45:18,173 Close the curtains and scrub the bathroom with Lysol. 1033 00:45:18,257 --> 00:45:21,885 -Why the curtains? -Richard, explain, please. 1034 00:45:21,969 --> 00:45:23,137 [whispering] I'm not sure. 1035 00:45:23,220 --> 00:45:24,513 [Meg] So people can't see in the windows. 1036 00:45:24,596 --> 00:45:26,140 Exactly. 1037 00:45:26,223 --> 00:45:28,392 And we got to hurry, my shift's up at 8:00. 1038 00:45:28,475 --> 00:45:31,478 After that, we got to deal with Cano, and we don't want to deal with Cano. 1039 00:45:33,897 --> 00:45:35,858 [Jordan] You're pretty good at this. 1040 00:45:35,941 --> 00:45:38,360 Just wrap it, like an egg roll. 1041 00:45:38,444 --> 00:45:40,320 [Jordan] An egg roll? I hate egg rolls. 1042 00:45:40,404 --> 00:45:42,990 Jordan, I really think that someone needs to 1043 00:45:43,073 --> 00:45:44,491 go downstairs and look for my parents. 1044 00:45:44,575 --> 00:45:47,536 That's a good call. Meg, that's on you. 1045 00:45:47,619 --> 00:45:51,206 When you smoke blunts you gotta roll 'em tight. 1046 00:45:51,290 --> 00:45:53,709 -[Jordan] I'm gonna get his legs. -[Ellen] Okay. 1047 00:45:55,794 --> 00:45:57,171 Don't ask. 1048 00:46:00,174 --> 00:46:03,469 [gasps] Hi! Mom! Dad! 1049 00:46:03,552 --> 00:46:05,471 -[John] Hi, sweetie! -[Meg] Hey, guys! 1050 00:46:05,554 --> 00:46:07,222 Oh, my God! 1051 00:46:07,306 --> 00:46:09,808 -Richard! -Dad! Dad! 1052 00:46:09,892 --> 00:46:11,310 -Richard, don't you dare! -Dad! 1053 00:46:11,393 --> 00:46:13,437 Yeah, he's not coming back. 1054 00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:16,440 -[Meg] Dad! -[John] Hi, how are you? 1055 00:46:16,523 --> 00:46:18,734 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, whoa! 1056 00:46:18,817 --> 00:46:21,653 [laughter] 1057 00:46:22,696 --> 00:46:24,198 [John] Now, that's crazy, huh? 1058 00:46:24,281 --> 00:46:26,283 They're here, right? I mean, this is happening. 1059 00:46:26,366 --> 00:46:28,327 This is definitely happening. Yep. 1060 00:46:28,410 --> 00:46:31,413 Okay, Okay! So we're gonna go out there, we're gonna be nice 1061 00:46:31,497 --> 00:46:33,290 and we're gonna be cordial, and then we're gonna have 1062 00:46:33,373 --> 00:46:35,792 a nice, pleasant dinner, and then we'll send them on their way! 1063 00:46:35,876 --> 00:46:36,919 Okay? -Okay. 1064 00:46:37,002 --> 00:46:39,129 Where is everyone? Hello! 1065 00:46:39,213 --> 00:46:40,464 [laughter] 1066 00:46:40,547 --> 00:46:42,257 They'll be here in-- in a second. 1067 00:46:42,341 --> 00:46:45,010 -Are they not home? -Yes, they're in the kitchen. 1068 00:46:45,093 --> 00:46:46,386 How did you guys get up here? 1069 00:46:46,470 --> 00:46:48,847 Well, there was no doorman, so we just headed on up. 1070 00:46:48,931 --> 00:46:51,058 -Great. -Who do I give the wine to? 1071 00:46:51,141 --> 00:46:53,227 -Um... -I'll take that. 1072 00:46:53,310 --> 00:46:55,020 Hi! I'm Beth! 1073 00:46:55,103 --> 00:46:56,480 I don't know who I am anymore. 1074 00:46:56,563 --> 00:46:59,024 Mom, eyes! We got this! 1075 00:46:59,107 --> 00:47:00,317 Yeah. 1076 00:47:01,068 --> 00:47:03,403 Now go out there and say hi. 1077 00:47:03,487 --> 00:47:05,656 You go. They're your in-laws! 1078 00:47:05,739 --> 00:47:07,866 [Abby] This is a great start. 1079 00:47:08,617 --> 00:47:09,826 Okay. 1080 00:47:12,037 --> 00:47:13,497 [David] Hi! 1081 00:47:13,580 --> 00:47:16,458 -All the way from Milwaukee! -Hey! 1082 00:47:16,542 --> 00:47:17,459 [laughter] 1083 00:47:17,543 --> 00:47:18,669 -Hiya! -Hey. 1084 00:47:18,752 --> 00:47:20,128 [John] Good to see ya. 1085 00:47:20,212 --> 00:47:21,672 Actually, we drove in from Connecticut. 1086 00:47:21,755 --> 00:47:22,839 Oh! 1087 00:47:22,923 --> 00:47:24,550 Yeah, we were visiting friends in Connecticut. 1088 00:47:24,633 --> 00:47:27,135 Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How are the Packers? 1089 00:47:27,219 --> 00:47:29,763 Don't remind him. He's missing the game on Sunday. 1090 00:47:29,846 --> 00:47:32,599 -The things we do for family. -Yeah. 1091 00:47:32,683 --> 00:47:34,810 -Yeah. -Yeah. 1092 00:47:34,893 --> 00:47:35,769 Yeah. 1093 00:47:37,062 --> 00:47:38,146 Welcome! 1094 00:47:38,230 --> 00:47:39,731 -Abby? -Yes! 1095 00:47:39,815 --> 00:47:41,233 -John. -Hi. 1096 00:47:41,316 --> 00:47:43,443 He likes to learn everyone's name in advance, Abby. 1097 00:47:43,527 --> 00:47:46,780 Well, I don't memorize them, but I like to remember what I'm told. 1098 00:47:46,863 --> 00:47:48,407 Wow. That's right. 1099 00:47:48,490 --> 00:47:51,118 Oh, I'm David's sister and soon to be Meg's sister. 1100 00:47:51,201 --> 00:47:53,120 -Aww... -[laughter] 1101 00:47:53,203 --> 00:47:55,247 [thud in bathroom] 1102 00:47:55,330 --> 00:47:57,499 Cantaloupe. 1103 00:47:57,583 --> 00:47:58,834 Family loves cantaloupe. 1104 00:47:58,917 --> 00:48:00,294 -Let's go this way. -Can I help? 1105 00:48:00,377 --> 00:48:01,753 No, no, no, no. We should go this way. 1106 00:48:01,837 --> 00:48:03,755 -Can you help me in the-- -We're gonna show you-- 1107 00:48:03,839 --> 00:48:05,424 -Mom, let's go. -house stuff. 1108 00:48:12,639 --> 00:48:15,767 [horn honking] 1109 00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:26,945 [muttering] 1110 00:48:27,029 --> 00:48:28,655 -[door opens] -[Ellen] Richard. Get. Up! 1111 00:48:28,739 --> 00:48:29,615 -No. -Up! 1112 00:48:29,698 --> 00:48:31,325 No, I can't, and I won't! 1113 00:48:32,784 --> 00:48:34,578 I swear to God, I'll drop this. 1114 00:48:34,661 --> 00:48:35,829 No, you wouldn't! 1115 00:48:36,830 --> 00:48:38,332 Richard. 1116 00:48:38,415 --> 00:48:40,417 Your children need you. 1117 00:48:40,500 --> 00:48:42,586 David needs you to make a good impression 1118 00:48:42,669 --> 00:48:45,756 and then kick them out in 18 minutes. 1119 00:48:45,839 --> 00:48:48,050 Look, I'm still trying to figure things out here. 1120 00:48:48,133 --> 00:48:50,010 Use your breathing technique. 1121 00:48:50,093 --> 00:48:51,094 Which one? 1122 00:48:51,178 --> 00:48:53,096 The Alexander Technique. 1123 00:48:53,180 --> 00:48:54,473 That's for posture. 1124 00:48:54,556 --> 00:48:56,558 You'll breathe on the way up. 1125 00:48:56,642 --> 00:49:00,228 In... Out... In... 1126 00:49:00,312 --> 00:49:02,689 [John] Oh! We were caught in traffic for like-- 1127 00:49:02,773 --> 00:49:05,484 [Ellen] Hello, hello! 1128 00:49:05,567 --> 00:49:06,943 You must be John and Beth. 1129 00:49:07,027 --> 00:49:08,153 Now, which one is which? 1130 00:49:08,236 --> 00:49:09,780 -[laughter] -Richard. 1131 00:49:09,863 --> 00:49:12,949 No, you must be Beth. Hi. I'm Richard. 1132 00:49:13,033 --> 00:49:14,534 And I guess that means you're John? 1133 00:49:14,618 --> 00:49:16,662 -That's right. -Nice to meet you. 1134 00:49:16,745 --> 00:49:18,872 We apologize for being so late. I couldn't believe the traffic. 1135 00:49:18,955 --> 00:49:22,209 You're not late. You're our guests of honor. 1136 00:49:22,292 --> 00:49:24,127 Dinner starts when you arrive. 1137 00:49:24,211 --> 00:49:26,713 -Mmm... -Mm-hmm. 1138 00:49:26,797 --> 00:49:30,634 David was telling us that you've been married for 37 years. 1139 00:49:30,717 --> 00:49:32,302 On our way to 40. 1140 00:49:32,386 --> 00:49:36,807 Yeah, but it feels like 4 minutes...underwater. 1141 00:49:36,890 --> 00:49:38,600 Oh... 1142 00:49:38,684 --> 00:49:40,394 [Ellen, softly] Richard. 1143 00:49:40,477 --> 00:49:44,564 Oh, John, would you like a yarmulke to wear for dinner? 1144 00:49:44,648 --> 00:49:47,693 -Is it, uh, mandatory? -No, no, of course not. 1145 00:49:47,776 --> 00:49:49,277 I mean, some men like the tradition, but it's-- 1146 00:49:49,361 --> 00:49:50,862 Oh, that's all right, thank you. 1147 00:49:50,946 --> 00:49:52,322 Oh, sure, no problem. 1148 00:49:52,406 --> 00:49:54,157 I'm just not much of a hat guy. 1149 00:49:54,241 --> 00:49:55,701 Yeah, me neither. 1150 00:49:55,784 --> 00:49:58,745 Mine's always like, sliding off my head, you know? 1151 00:49:58,829 --> 00:50:01,081 Kind of strange... 1152 00:50:02,708 --> 00:50:04,084 [Ellen] So... 1153 00:50:06,128 --> 00:50:07,337 who wants to eat? 1154 00:50:07,421 --> 00:50:08,839 [chairs scraping on floor] 1155 00:50:11,758 --> 00:50:13,927 [clearing throat] 1156 00:50:14,010 --> 00:50:18,140 Now we begin by singing a Hebrew song to welcome Shabbat, 1157 00:50:18,223 --> 00:50:20,267 and then say a blessing before the meal. 1158 00:50:20,350 --> 00:50:23,478 Well, thank you. We're very curious. 1159 00:50:23,562 --> 00:50:26,356 [Beth] Oh, okay, you had some. Did you like it? 1160 00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:28,817 It has an "OU" on it so, you know, it's Kosher. 1161 00:50:28,900 --> 00:50:30,777 Fantastic. Thank you. 1162 00:50:33,155 --> 00:50:35,949 [David sings a Hebrew hymn] 1163 00:50:36,032 --> 00:50:38,785 [all sing Hebrew hymn] 1164 00:50:41,997 --> 00:50:44,166 [singing faster] 1165 00:50:46,626 --> 00:50:47,919 Okay, that's the end of the song. 1166 00:50:48,003 --> 00:50:49,880 -Yes, that is it. -Good song, huh? 1167 00:50:49,963 --> 00:50:51,465 So, now it's customary 1168 00:50:51,882 --> 00:50:55,177 that we all stand before we start the meal. 1169 00:50:55,260 --> 00:50:56,261 It's called Kiddush. 1170 00:50:56,344 --> 00:50:57,763 Oh, the Kiddush. 1171 00:50:57,846 --> 00:50:59,514 Oh, that's an interesting word. 1172 00:51:04,019 --> 00:51:06,313 [Richard] The wine-- oh. 1173 00:51:06,396 --> 00:51:08,356 [dripping] 1174 00:51:08,440 --> 00:51:12,110 It's traditional to make the wine overflow 1175 00:51:12,194 --> 00:51:15,572 to symbolize a good week overflowing with happiness. 1176 00:51:15,655 --> 00:51:16,990 -Yeah. -Isn't that right? 1177 00:51:17,073 --> 00:51:18,283 Right, yes, beautiful. 1178 00:51:18,366 --> 00:51:20,035 [anxious laughter] 1179 00:51:20,118 --> 00:51:23,789 [Richard chants] 1180 00:51:23,872 --> 00:51:29,294 [Richard continues to chant in the dining room] 1181 00:51:29,377 --> 00:51:30,462 -Amen. -Amen. 1182 00:51:30,545 --> 00:51:32,798 [John] Amen. I know that one. 1183 00:52:10,085 --> 00:52:14,172 [Richard chants] 1184 00:52:16,925 --> 00:52:18,343 [all] Amen. 1185 00:52:18,426 --> 00:52:20,178 -Amen. -Amen. 1186 00:52:20,262 --> 00:52:22,097 -[Richard] Okay, there you go. -Thanks, Dad. 1187 00:52:22,180 --> 00:52:24,558 Ooh, there you go! Mom? 1188 00:52:24,641 --> 00:52:25,559 Oh. -Sorry. 1189 00:52:25,642 --> 00:52:26,935 Adam! 1190 00:52:27,018 --> 00:52:29,187 This is how we do it here. And you? 1191 00:52:29,271 --> 00:52:31,439 And here you go, John. I'll just hand it to you. 1192 00:52:31,523 --> 00:52:32,649 -There you go. -Thank you. 1193 00:52:32,732 --> 00:52:34,317 Time for soup. 1194 00:52:34,401 --> 00:52:35,485 Oh! 1195 00:52:35,569 --> 00:52:36,987 -No, please. -I insist. 1196 00:52:37,070 --> 00:52:38,071 No, no, it's fine. 1197 00:52:38,154 --> 00:52:39,698 Mom it's fine. It's fine. 1198 00:52:39,781 --> 00:52:43,577 I don't allow guests to help. It's a tradition. 1199 00:52:43,660 --> 00:52:44,786 -Oh. -Abby? 1200 00:52:44,870 --> 00:52:46,538 [Beth] Oh, okay, please, I-- 1201 00:52:46,621 --> 00:52:48,915 -No. -It's tradition. Just... 1202 00:52:52,210 --> 00:52:53,253 Okay. 1203 00:52:53,336 --> 00:52:57,257 You know, I have a special history with this city. 1204 00:52:57,340 --> 00:52:58,800 When I was 8 years old, 1205 00:52:58,884 --> 00:53:01,970 my uncle brought me here for Christmas. 1206 00:53:02,053 --> 00:53:03,847 That's such a beautiful time of the year. 1207 00:53:03,930 --> 00:53:07,475 It was quite magical. Just walking down Fifth Avenue, 1208 00:53:07,559 --> 00:53:11,146 seeing all the Christmas lights and the Christmas displays-- 1209 00:53:11,229 --> 00:53:12,606 -The men! -What? 1210 00:53:12,689 --> 00:53:16,151 The man's chant! It's a tradition. We forgot-- 1211 00:53:16,234 --> 00:53:20,947 It's a tradition. All the men must close their eyes and chant. 1212 00:53:21,031 --> 00:53:22,657 Um, what do I do? 1213 00:53:22,741 --> 00:53:23,992 And you can do it too, Beth. 1214 00:53:24,075 --> 00:53:25,827 -Oh, really? -Yeah, but don't chant. 1215 00:53:25,911 --> 00:53:27,287 -No, of course not. -Okay. 1216 00:53:27,370 --> 00:53:29,289 Okay. So... -Dad. 1217 00:53:29,372 --> 00:53:31,207 -What? We cover our eyes, -Okay. 1218 00:53:31,291 --> 00:53:32,542 and we chant. 1219 00:53:32,626 --> 00:53:33,919 Okay, just cover your eyes, everyone. 1220 00:53:34,002 --> 00:53:35,587 Okay, now keep them covered all the way. 1221 00:53:35,670 --> 00:53:37,047 Please don't touch me. 1222 00:53:37,130 --> 00:53:38,298 Just cover-- it's part of the tradition. 1223 00:53:38,381 --> 00:53:39,716 Okay. Okay. 1224 00:53:39,799 --> 00:53:42,469 Okay, here we go. [Richard improvises a chant] 1225 00:53:45,305 --> 00:53:49,184 [chanting continues, others join] 1226 00:53:49,267 --> 00:53:53,730 [all chanting, playing along] 1227 00:53:53,813 --> 00:53:56,608 ♪ Ay, yuy, yuy, yuy! ♪ 1228 00:54:03,907 --> 00:54:05,992 [chanting concludes] 1229 00:54:06,076 --> 00:54:07,410 That's it. 1230 00:54:07,494 --> 00:54:09,371 -Good man chant. -Yeah. 1231 00:54:09,454 --> 00:54:10,538 -Amen. -Amen. 1232 00:54:10,622 --> 00:54:12,332 -Amen. -To what? 1233 00:54:12,415 --> 00:54:14,417 To the-- to the-- to the blessing. 1234 00:54:14,501 --> 00:54:18,213 That was the blessing! I feel like I was at the Wailing Wall! 1235 00:54:18,296 --> 00:54:19,965 [laughter] 1236 00:54:20,048 --> 00:54:21,967 Yeah, no, it's a beautiful blessing. We do it every week. 1237 00:54:22,050 --> 00:54:23,385 -Yeah. -Interesting, 1238 00:54:23,468 --> 00:54:24,928 but why don't the women participate? 1239 00:54:25,011 --> 00:54:26,554 It's a great question, John. 1240 00:54:26,638 --> 00:54:29,432 It's because Eve ate the apple, so you can't chant. 1241 00:54:29,516 --> 00:54:31,476 Eve was a fool. I'd never eat the apple. 1242 00:54:31,559 --> 00:54:33,853 -But you still can't chant. -You still can't chant. 1243 00:54:33,937 --> 00:54:35,689 What are your other kids doing? 1244 00:54:35,772 --> 00:54:37,649 Meghan's siblings all live overseas. 1245 00:54:37,732 --> 00:54:39,234 For quite some time now. 1246 00:54:39,317 --> 00:54:41,861 And so what did you do to make them all want to leave? 1247 00:54:41,945 --> 00:54:44,072 -Oh, you're very funny! -Aww. 1248 00:54:44,155 --> 00:54:49,953 Actually, Meghan's sister, Beatrice, she lives in Milan, 1249 00:54:50,036 --> 00:54:52,664 working as a fashion consultant. 1250 00:54:52,747 --> 00:54:54,374 Mmm, mmm. 1251 00:54:54,457 --> 00:54:56,209 That's a lovely camisole you have on there. 1252 00:54:56,292 --> 00:54:57,961 Thank you. 1253 00:54:58,044 --> 00:54:59,462 -It's not a camisole. -But it is lovely. 1254 00:54:59,546 --> 00:55:01,089 I have some talent, 1255 00:55:01,172 --> 00:55:04,718 not much, but, but Beatrice did get me 40% off. 1256 00:55:05,885 --> 00:55:07,721 It's a pretty good discount, huh? Hmm? 1257 00:55:07,804 --> 00:55:09,180 [silverware drops on plate] 1258 00:55:09,264 --> 00:55:12,142 [Beth laughs nervously] 1259 00:55:12,225 --> 00:55:17,939 You know, when David asked us for permission to marry Meghan, 1260 00:55:18,023 --> 00:55:20,650 -of course we said yes. -[John] We love David. 1261 00:55:20,734 --> 00:55:24,487 But what really moved me was... I asked David 1262 00:55:24,571 --> 00:55:28,700 and he said he would be willing to move anywhere 1263 00:55:28,783 --> 00:55:32,537 that Meghan wanted, even back to Wisconsin. 1264 00:55:32,620 --> 00:55:35,790 Well, I don't know Mom. I really like New York. 1265 00:55:35,874 --> 00:55:38,793 [Beth] Well, I did, too, in my twenties, but people move on. 1266 00:55:38,877 --> 00:55:40,295 Not always. 1267 00:55:40,378 --> 00:55:43,089 [clears throat] John! You know, my dad here is a big Cheesehead. 1268 00:55:43,173 --> 00:55:45,592 No, is that right? I thought you'd be rooting for the Giants. 1269 00:55:45,675 --> 00:55:47,177 -Excuse me? -The football team, Dad. 1270 00:55:47,260 --> 00:55:48,428 -You done? -It's full. 1271 00:55:48,511 --> 00:55:50,096 Don't want to fill up on soup. 1272 00:55:50,180 --> 00:55:51,556 -Richard only likes baseball. -Yankees or Mets? 1273 00:55:51,639 --> 00:55:53,099 [Richard] You know what, I actually like both. 1274 00:55:53,183 --> 00:55:54,392 You look done. 1275 00:55:55,435 --> 00:55:56,644 I guess. 1276 00:55:57,437 --> 00:56:01,191 [heavy breathing] 1277 00:56:01,274 --> 00:56:02,942 [muffled voices in next room] 1278 00:56:06,112 --> 00:56:09,532 [Adam] You know, Meg knows more about Judaism than most of my friends. 1279 00:56:09,616 --> 00:56:11,576 Yeah, she's doing wonderfully in class. 1280 00:56:11,659 --> 00:56:13,787 I don't know how much credit I actually deserve. 1281 00:56:13,870 --> 00:56:16,289 Rabbi Morgenstern is really, really great. 1282 00:56:16,372 --> 00:56:17,957 Yeah, and he rarely does conversions. 1283 00:56:18,041 --> 00:56:19,667 Well, we've heard all about the Rabbi. 1284 00:56:19,751 --> 00:56:21,753 Does anyone want some of this wine? 1285 00:56:21,836 --> 00:56:26,424 It's got the wax seal on it, so it's...it's fancy. 1286 00:56:26,508 --> 00:56:28,259 -I'll take some. -Me too. 1287 00:56:28,343 --> 00:56:30,428 You know, Adam, 1288 00:56:30,512 --> 00:56:33,556 the funny thing is Meghan was never really very religious. 1289 00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:37,435 Yeah but I always liked the stories, the Bible stories. 1290 00:56:37,519 --> 00:56:40,563 Right, yes, it's all fairly similar. 1291 00:56:40,647 --> 00:56:44,400 It's just not as draconian. 1292 00:56:44,484 --> 00:56:45,902 Draconian? 1293 00:56:45,985 --> 00:56:48,905 Well, not the rules, but I mean, just, you know, we-- 1294 00:56:48,988 --> 00:56:50,573 we both have family time together, 1295 00:56:50,657 --> 00:56:54,661 Jews, Friday dinner and us Sunday brunch. 1296 00:56:54,744 --> 00:56:59,290 We just don't want our kids to feel pressured about showing up. 1297 00:56:59,374 --> 00:57:02,210 No, of course, pressure is no good. 1298 00:57:02,293 --> 00:57:07,549 You know the Rabbi, he said that, well, we've been talking about the Talmud, 1299 00:57:07,632 --> 00:57:10,969 and how it's essentially just a book of arguing. 1300 00:57:11,052 --> 00:57:12,303 [laughter] 1301 00:57:12,387 --> 00:57:13,888 Meghan was in debate club. 1302 00:57:13,972 --> 00:57:16,224 -Mm-hmm. -She was captain. 1303 00:57:16,307 --> 00:57:19,853 She always had a real... what is the word you use? 1304 00:57:19,936 --> 00:57:20,979 Ootz-bah. 1305 00:57:21,062 --> 00:57:23,022 -Chutzpah. -Chutzpah. 1306 00:57:23,106 --> 00:57:24,190 How do you say it? 1307 00:57:24,274 --> 00:57:25,608 -Chutzpah. -Chutzpah. 1308 00:57:25,692 --> 00:57:27,402 -No, Chutzpah. -Hootzbah? 1309 00:57:27,485 --> 00:57:29,070 -No. -You're a natural. 1310 00:57:29,154 --> 00:57:30,613 Isn't that derogatory? 1311 00:57:30,697 --> 00:57:33,741 Mom! No, no, no. It's more like... 1312 00:57:33,825 --> 00:57:36,411 -A certain boldness. -Gumption. 1313 00:57:36,494 --> 00:57:39,038 -It's more audacity. -Well, I wouldn't call her audacious. 1314 00:57:39,122 --> 00:57:40,999 -Oh, no. -But it's a good audacious. 1315 00:57:41,082 --> 00:57:44,377 -Is there such thing? -Well, that depends on who you ask. 1316 00:57:44,461 --> 00:57:45,920 Why are you looking at me? 1317 00:57:46,004 --> 00:57:47,297 Well, you're sitting across from me. 1318 00:57:47,380 --> 00:57:48,882 Where else am I supposed to look? 1319 00:57:48,965 --> 00:57:51,176 [John] Well, that's not the way I meant it. 1320 00:57:51,259 --> 00:57:55,221 I meant to say that she always had a real poise. 1321 00:57:55,305 --> 00:57:57,182 Yes, the rest of our children are never really into 1322 00:57:57,265 --> 00:57:59,309 debate or argument, 1323 00:57:59,392 --> 00:58:02,061 but Meghan always had a penchant for that. 1324 00:58:02,145 --> 00:58:04,772 Well, makes me feel a lot better about losing every argument. 1325 00:58:04,856 --> 00:58:07,358 Well, it's fine. I'll find a class for you. 1326 00:58:07,442 --> 00:58:10,737 -[laughter] -Aww... 1327 00:58:10,820 --> 00:58:14,699 Abby, um... don't you have a boyfriend? 1328 00:58:14,782 --> 00:58:16,117 What's his name? 1329 00:58:16,201 --> 00:58:18,745 [Abby] No, I... [nervously stuttering] 1330 00:58:18,828 --> 00:58:20,330 Uh, Benjamin? 1331 00:58:20,413 --> 00:58:23,583 -Yes, where's Benjamin? -Is he still joining us? 1332 00:58:23,666 --> 00:58:25,126 -What? -Benjamin, your boyfriend. 1333 00:58:25,210 --> 00:58:27,128 Meghan said he was gonna be joining us. 1334 00:58:27,212 --> 00:58:30,256 Oh, my boyfriend. Oh... 1335 00:58:30,340 --> 00:58:35,678 He... he tri-- you know, he wanted-- he wanted to be here. 1336 00:58:35,762 --> 00:58:38,598 -But there was... -He was going to, but he-- 1337 00:58:38,681 --> 00:58:40,600 I think it was, there was some sort of traffic. 1338 00:58:40,683 --> 00:58:44,020 [Meg] Right? And I was gonna say he couldn't make it. 1339 00:58:44,103 --> 00:58:45,396 -There was something-- -What happened? 1340 00:58:45,480 --> 00:58:47,398 [David] You know, it's one of those things. 1341 00:58:47,482 --> 00:58:49,400 [Richard] The transportation, you know... 1342 00:58:49,484 --> 00:58:51,819 -[footsteps approaching] -[Abby] It was the traffic... 1343 00:58:51,903 --> 00:58:53,071 [spoon hits plate, talking stops] 1344 00:58:58,701 --> 00:59:00,328 Good Shabbos, everyone. 1345 00:59:02,372 --> 00:59:04,874 Sorry I'm late. Prayer ran long, real long. 1346 00:59:04,958 --> 00:59:07,794 That was one slow-ass Rabbi. 1347 00:59:07,877 --> 00:59:09,921 And look at you two, you gorgeous people 1348 00:59:10,004 --> 00:59:12,465 must be Meg's parents. 1349 00:59:12,549 --> 00:59:14,384 Benjamin. 1350 00:59:14,467 --> 00:59:16,135 -Uh, John. -Pleasure. 1351 00:59:16,219 --> 00:59:18,012 -Beth! -Beth! 1352 00:59:18,096 --> 00:59:19,973 All right, Benjamin, Beth. Got a little B&B going there, huh? 1353 00:59:20,056 --> 00:59:22,225 -Yeah! -Ellen. 1354 00:59:22,308 --> 00:59:23,434 Richie! 1355 00:59:24,561 --> 00:59:26,396 Shabbat, Shalom. 1356 00:59:27,647 --> 00:59:29,607 Hey, buddy, what's happening? 1357 00:59:29,691 --> 00:59:30,858 Darling. 1358 00:59:30,942 --> 00:59:33,653 [laughs nervously] 1359 00:59:33,736 --> 00:59:35,029 [kiss] 1360 00:59:38,283 --> 00:59:39,576 Mmm! 1361 00:59:39,659 --> 00:59:42,495 Well, you all look surprised. 1362 00:59:42,579 --> 00:59:45,999 -We don't. -We're not. 1363 00:59:46,082 --> 00:59:47,667 [laughter] 1364 00:59:47,750 --> 00:59:49,794 I'm just playing. Look, I get it, okay? 1365 00:59:49,877 --> 00:59:51,379 People hear "Benjamin the Jew," 1366 00:59:51,462 --> 00:59:53,172 and it's not what they think of, right? 1367 00:59:53,256 --> 00:59:56,134 I mean, not what they picture. Ha, ha, ha! 1368 00:59:56,217 --> 00:59:58,344 Honestly, no. 1369 00:59:58,428 --> 01:00:00,388 I got two words for you, Big John: 1370 01:00:01,556 --> 01:00:03,975 Ethiopian. Jews. 1371 01:00:05,268 --> 01:00:06,227 From Ethiopia? 1372 01:00:06,311 --> 01:00:08,896 Yeah, the lost tribe, baby. 1373 01:00:08,980 --> 01:00:13,067 Lost for thousands of years, but...we're back. 1374 01:00:13,151 --> 01:00:14,986 -That's true. -I-- I see. 1375 01:00:15,069 --> 01:00:16,821 Benjamin, don't you have that thing? 1376 01:00:16,904 --> 01:00:18,656 [Jordan] No, I'm good to chill. 1377 01:00:18,740 --> 01:00:20,033 Benjamin, I'd love to know-- 1378 01:00:20,116 --> 01:00:23,661 You have questions, my love, I have answers. 1379 01:00:23,745 --> 01:00:26,497 Well, I haven't, you know, read about this, but are there 1380 01:00:26,581 --> 01:00:28,124 many in your community? 1381 01:00:28,207 --> 01:00:30,418 Well, yeah, I mean, we're just not as well-known, 1382 01:00:30,501 --> 01:00:33,004 I mean, but there's a lot of us about, what, 200 thou, 1383 01:00:33,087 --> 01:00:34,756 give or take a thou. 1384 01:00:34,839 --> 01:00:36,424 I'm so glad you're found. 1385 01:00:36,841 --> 01:00:39,469 You know, many scholars believe that they descended 1386 01:00:39,552 --> 01:00:42,180 from King Solomon and Queen Sheba and others. 1387 01:00:42,263 --> 01:00:44,766 Yes. From Don, the Lost Tribe. 1388 01:00:44,849 --> 01:00:47,060 That's right. That's right. 1389 01:00:47,143 --> 01:00:49,854 So, why don't we all know about this? 1390 01:00:49,937 --> 01:00:52,315 You want to know why you don't know? 1391 01:00:52,398 --> 01:00:54,817 Because we control the media. 1392 01:00:54,901 --> 01:00:57,278 You know what we want you to know. 1393 01:00:57,362 --> 01:00:58,446 Now, hold on there. 1394 01:00:58,529 --> 01:00:59,947 And the banks. 1395 01:01:00,907 --> 01:01:02,825 -Uh... -Yeah. 1396 01:01:02,909 --> 01:01:06,454 And Adam operates the space lasers that control the weather. 1397 01:01:06,537 --> 01:01:07,914 Yeah, I do that. 1398 01:01:07,997 --> 01:01:11,292 [imitating laser gun] Pew! Pew! Pew! 1399 01:01:11,376 --> 01:01:13,878 -Pew! Pew! -[laughter] 1400 01:01:13,961 --> 01:01:15,922 Oh, very funny, Benjamin. 1401 01:01:16,005 --> 01:01:17,090 He does this routine. 1402 01:01:17,173 --> 01:01:18,508 Yeah, it goes on a long time. 1403 01:01:18,591 --> 01:01:20,885 "We control the media. We control the banks." 1404 01:01:20,968 --> 01:01:22,428 -"We're in charge of everything." -[laughter] 1405 01:01:22,512 --> 01:01:23,763 Of course, I'm just playing. 1406 01:01:23,846 --> 01:01:25,223 Well, you can say it, but I can't. 1407 01:01:25,306 --> 01:01:26,432 [all laughing] 1408 01:01:26,516 --> 01:01:28,226 And you shouldn't. 1409 01:01:28,309 --> 01:01:31,938 I mean, honestly, do you really think Richie here runs a bank? 1410 01:01:32,021 --> 01:01:33,773 He doesn't even run his own house. 1411 01:01:33,856 --> 01:01:35,775 [laughter] 1412 01:01:35,858 --> 01:01:36,943 That's funny. 1413 01:01:38,403 --> 01:01:40,238 -I'm gonna get the mains. -Let me help. 1414 01:01:40,321 --> 01:01:41,948 No, no, no, no, no. Tradition. 1415 01:01:43,324 --> 01:01:45,785 [instrumental music] 1416 01:01:59,882 --> 01:02:02,301 [somber music] 1417 01:02:53,144 --> 01:02:55,563 [somber music concludes] 1418 01:02:55,646 --> 01:02:58,566 Really? Your own special place. 1419 01:02:58,649 --> 01:03:00,276 -And where is that? -[Abby] No, no, no. 1420 01:03:00,359 --> 01:03:02,153 I don't think Benjamin means it in a literal sense. 1421 01:03:02,236 --> 01:03:03,446 -Yes, I do. -No, he doesn't. 1422 01:03:03,529 --> 01:03:05,239 Yes, I do! Would you like to know where? 1423 01:03:05,323 --> 01:03:06,657 Nobody keeps their foreskin! 1424 01:03:06,741 --> 01:03:08,159 Yes, we do. Tell them where it is. 1425 01:03:08,242 --> 01:03:09,494 -Please don't. -You're gonna like this. 1426 01:03:09,577 --> 01:03:11,370 Mine's is in a snow globe. 1427 01:03:11,454 --> 01:03:12,789 -Meg! -Yeah? 1428 01:03:12,872 --> 01:03:14,040 Why don't you do your d'var Torah? 1429 01:03:14,123 --> 01:03:15,625 [Meg] Oh, I don't, um-- 1430 01:03:15,708 --> 01:03:17,460 -Please share. -Yeah, please, d'var Torah. 1431 01:03:17,543 --> 01:03:19,128 I don't think that's actually the best-- 1432 01:03:19,212 --> 01:03:22,215 -No, I think you should. -Yeah, Bible story. 1433 01:03:22,298 --> 01:03:23,758 You have a Bible story, darling? 1434 01:03:23,841 --> 01:03:25,843 -It's the best Bible story. -Oh, I got some stories. 1435 01:03:25,927 --> 01:03:29,722 -You've told your stories. -But they were good stories. 1436 01:03:29,806 --> 01:03:31,974 All right, Meg, let's hear it. 1437 01:03:32,058 --> 01:03:34,519 Um, okay. 1438 01:03:34,602 --> 01:03:36,729 Yes, um, hello. 1439 01:03:36,813 --> 01:03:39,982 So, this week's Torah portion 1440 01:03:40,066 --> 01:03:45,071 is the story of Joseph and his brothers, how Joseph's 1441 01:03:45,154 --> 01:03:47,240 brothers dipped his multicolored coat 1442 01:03:47,323 --> 01:03:50,493 in blood to pretend that he died. 1443 01:03:50,576 --> 01:03:51,869 -Good subject. -Thank you. 1444 01:03:51,953 --> 01:03:54,247 I thought so too, yesterday. 1445 01:03:54,330 --> 01:03:55,414 Um... [clears throat] 1446 01:03:55,498 --> 01:03:57,542 So, um, in the Torah, Mom, Dad, 1447 01:03:57,625 --> 01:03:59,418 every detail is there for a reason. 1448 01:03:59,502 --> 01:04:03,172 However, in this story, there is one moment in particular 1449 01:04:03,256 --> 01:04:06,968 that at first glance appears meaningless. 1450 01:04:07,051 --> 01:04:09,971 When Joseph was wandering around looking for his brothers, 1451 01:04:10,054 --> 01:04:13,349 he asked a stranger, can you tell me where my brothers are? 1452 01:04:13,432 --> 01:04:17,061 And the stranger replied, "They went to Dothan." 1453 01:04:17,144 --> 01:04:20,648 So, why would the Torah include such a trivial passage? 1454 01:04:20,731 --> 01:04:23,025 Just a stranger giving directions. 1455 01:04:23,109 --> 01:04:27,405 The sages say it's because this stranger wasn't just a normal person. 1456 01:04:27,488 --> 01:04:33,035 He was actually an angel who didn't know he was an angel. 1457 01:04:33,119 --> 01:04:36,831 He had a vital role in this story, but he had no way of knowing at the time 1458 01:04:36,914 --> 01:04:40,751 the significance of this small interaction. 1459 01:04:40,835 --> 01:04:45,381 And like this stranger, we all have the ability to change the course 1460 01:04:45,464 --> 01:04:50,428 of someone else's life with a small moment or kindness. 1461 01:04:51,679 --> 01:04:55,266 We, too, can all be angels 1462 01:04:55,349 --> 01:04:59,145 who didn't know that they were angels. 1463 01:05:01,314 --> 01:05:03,858 -[applause] -Rabbi Meg. 1464 01:05:03,941 --> 01:05:05,109 A lovely story. 1465 01:05:05,192 --> 01:05:06,444 -That was great sweetie. -Wonderful. 1466 01:05:06,527 --> 01:05:07,862 -Beautiful. -Thank you. 1467 01:05:07,945 --> 01:05:10,573 Oh, well, it's time for dessert. 1468 01:05:10,656 --> 01:05:12,366 We have 7-layer cake, 1469 01:05:12,450 --> 01:05:15,828 and my father and Richard's favorites, 1470 01:05:15,912 --> 01:05:16,829 Linzer tarts. 1471 01:05:16,913 --> 01:05:18,497 Mmm. [laughter] 1472 01:05:18,581 --> 01:05:19,999 Dessert? 1473 01:05:20,082 --> 01:05:22,543 Yes, I'm so sorry. This is very embarrassing for me, 1474 01:05:22,627 --> 01:05:24,921 but as I was walking out of the bathroom 1475 01:05:25,004 --> 01:05:27,006 by the kitchen, I saw that the cat had knocked 1476 01:05:27,089 --> 01:05:28,716 everything on the floor. 1477 01:05:28,799 --> 01:05:31,052 -Oh, not the cat! -Ruined the entire meal. 1478 01:05:31,135 --> 01:05:32,720 Plop! -He's done this before. 1479 01:05:32,803 --> 01:05:34,305 This has happened before. 1480 01:05:34,388 --> 01:05:36,682 -He's a terrible cat. -Garfield on cocaine. 1481 01:05:36,766 --> 01:05:39,018 The cat knocked over the dinner. 1482 01:05:39,101 --> 01:05:41,395 That sounds like what happened. I believe so. 1483 01:05:41,479 --> 01:05:43,022 -Should we order food? -Yes. 1484 01:05:43,105 --> 01:05:44,690 -No. -No! 1485 01:05:44,774 --> 01:05:45,900 -No. -We can't use phones on Shabbos. 1486 01:05:45,983 --> 01:05:47,735 But we can. Just tell us the place. 1487 01:05:47,818 --> 01:05:50,029 No, that's cheating. Can't. 1488 01:05:50,112 --> 01:05:53,449 You know what, I think things are just not working out here tonight. 1489 01:05:53,532 --> 01:05:57,662 I think we should all get together tomorrow and have a great brunch. 1490 01:05:57,745 --> 01:05:58,955 -Yes! Brunch! -Yes! Brunch! 1491 01:05:59,038 --> 01:06:00,581 -I love brunch! -We love brunch. 1492 01:06:00,665 --> 01:06:01,874 -You love brunch. -Yeah. 1493 01:06:01,958 --> 01:06:07,546 We came all the way from Wisconsin to be here. 1494 01:06:07,630 --> 01:06:09,882 And we appreciate you coming very much. 1495 01:06:09,966 --> 01:06:12,927 There's just no predicting that things like this could happen. 1496 01:06:13,010 --> 01:06:17,765 But never did I think that we would be rushed out of your home. 1497 01:06:17,848 --> 01:06:21,018 No, no, Dad, I promise it's this cat. It's-- 1498 01:06:21,102 --> 01:06:23,312 -He's aggressive and-- -Aggressive how? 1499 01:06:23,396 --> 01:06:25,022 You know, it's my cat. 1500 01:06:25,106 --> 01:06:28,275 And I have burdened my sweet parents with it for too long. 1501 01:06:28,359 --> 01:06:30,444 He knocked everything on the floor, and when I say ev-- 1502 01:06:30,528 --> 01:06:32,071 Do you expect us to believe 1503 01:06:32,154 --> 01:06:35,199 that the entire meal just suddenly disappeared?! 1504 01:06:35,282 --> 01:06:36,367 Hmm! 1505 01:06:37,618 --> 01:06:40,746 -Yeah... -Yeah... 1506 01:06:40,830 --> 01:06:43,165 -[clearing throat] -Let me help you clean up. 1507 01:06:43,249 --> 01:06:44,959 What? No, no, no, no, no, no, please. 1508 01:06:45,042 --> 01:06:46,585 -You're our guests. -Our guests of honor. 1509 01:06:46,669 --> 01:06:48,212 No, I insist. 1510 01:06:48,295 --> 01:06:49,672 -No, no, no, it's fine. -It's just simple manners. 1511 01:06:49,755 --> 01:06:50,798 I promise. 1512 01:06:50,881 --> 01:06:52,925 -Let me help! -You're free to leave. 1513 01:06:53,009 --> 01:06:54,760 -Fine! -Not until it's clean! 1514 01:06:54,844 --> 01:06:57,596 -It's totally unnecessary! -Let me help you, please! 1515 01:06:57,680 --> 01:06:59,056 -Just-- -Oh! 1516 01:06:59,140 --> 01:07:00,474 [John] What was that? 1517 01:07:00,558 --> 01:07:03,477 Did you just intentionally spill wine all over me? 1518 01:07:03,561 --> 01:07:05,396 -It was an accident. -An accident? 1519 01:07:05,479 --> 01:07:07,106 John, John, he didn't mean it. 1520 01:07:07,189 --> 01:07:09,025 Well, he swiped his arm right across the table! 1521 01:07:09,108 --> 01:07:10,943 No, I was reaching for the salt, 1522 01:07:11,027 --> 01:07:12,903 the salt over there. 1523 01:07:12,987 --> 01:07:14,196 Let's go. 1524 01:07:14,280 --> 01:07:15,531 That's all right, it's all right. 1525 01:07:15,614 --> 01:07:19,452 Let me just clean up and have some dessert. 1526 01:07:19,535 --> 01:07:21,495 Where's your bathroom? 1527 01:07:21,579 --> 01:07:22,830 [Ellen] Wait a minute, you're staying? 1528 01:07:22,913 --> 01:07:24,582 Are you sure you want to stay? 1529 01:07:24,665 --> 01:07:26,375 I mean, don't you want to go home and change? 1530 01:07:26,459 --> 01:07:28,210 I mean I think you're just a real mess. 1531 01:07:28,294 --> 01:07:29,336 -Aah! -Aah! 1532 01:07:30,254 --> 01:07:31,797 Ohh... 1533 01:07:31,881 --> 01:07:33,758 [plate rattles] 1534 01:07:35,676 --> 01:07:37,970 Ohh... 1535 01:07:38,054 --> 01:07:42,141 So, you're not gonna believe this, but, um, 1536 01:07:42,224 --> 01:07:44,101 -there's this tradition. -Ugh! 1537 01:07:46,687 --> 01:07:52,068 Enough with the traditions, okay? 1538 01:07:52,151 --> 01:07:54,028 [Beth] You should be ashamed. 1539 01:07:54,111 --> 01:07:57,406 You should all be ashamed. 1540 01:07:58,324 --> 01:08:03,537 Is this because I wouldn't wear that little hat? 1541 01:08:03,621 --> 01:08:05,164 What? 1542 01:08:05,247 --> 01:08:07,374 That thing on your head. 1543 01:08:07,458 --> 01:08:10,503 -What, the yarmulke? -Yes. 1544 01:08:10,586 --> 01:08:14,548 Would you have shown me respect if I had worn it? 1545 01:08:14,632 --> 01:08:17,343 Respect? No, you have my respect. 1546 01:08:17,426 --> 01:08:20,471 -You've always had my respect. -Oh, yes, of course we respect you. 1547 01:08:20,554 --> 01:08:22,181 And we're very happy that you came. 1548 01:08:22,264 --> 01:08:24,558 -Yeah. -Sure you are. 1549 01:08:24,642 --> 01:08:27,353 Well, let's go, honey. 1550 01:08:27,436 --> 01:08:29,188 -No, John. -Dad, come on. 1551 01:08:29,271 --> 01:08:30,898 -Beth! -Stop. 1552 01:08:30,981 --> 01:08:32,149 [Meg] Dad! Mom! 1553 01:08:32,233 --> 01:08:33,359 -[groaning] -Dad! 1554 01:08:35,945 --> 01:08:37,613 [voice breaking] This is what you want? 1555 01:08:38,489 --> 01:08:39,657 Mom. 1556 01:08:40,533 --> 01:08:41,784 Bye, Meg. 1557 01:08:41,867 --> 01:08:43,077 [David] Beth... 1558 01:08:44,745 --> 01:08:46,664 [crying] I love you both. 1559 01:08:48,124 --> 01:08:49,458 [door closes] 1560 01:08:49,542 --> 01:08:51,043 [Jordan] See ya at the wedding! 1561 01:08:52,503 --> 01:08:54,922 Okay, 4 minutes until Cano's shift. Let's move. 1562 01:08:55,005 --> 01:08:56,966 Hey, Wolf! What the hell was that? 1563 01:08:57,049 --> 01:08:58,384 I was playing a part. 1564 01:08:58,467 --> 01:09:00,052 "See you at the wedding?" 1565 01:09:00,136 --> 01:09:01,887 No, you won't. You'll be dead! 1566 01:09:01,971 --> 01:09:03,430 -He was just being polite. -Polite? 1567 01:09:03,514 --> 01:09:04,974 -I thought it was smart. -What do you-- 1568 01:09:05,057 --> 01:09:06,559 Hey, Soup Boy, don't talk to me right now, 1569 01:09:06,642 --> 01:09:07,726 Okay? I can't even look at you. 1570 01:09:07,810 --> 01:09:09,603 How am I supposed to have a relationship with them now? 1571 01:09:09,687 --> 01:09:10,688 Well, we'll worry about that later. 1572 01:09:10,771 --> 01:09:12,064 -Oh, you must be so happy. -Happy? 1573 01:09:12,148 --> 01:09:13,774 This must be such a wonderful silver lining for you. 1574 01:09:13,858 --> 01:09:15,776 David, just stop, stop. 1575 01:09:15,860 --> 01:09:17,403 Meg, I'm so sorry. 1576 01:09:17,486 --> 01:09:19,363 [Meg] No, it's fine. Let's just keep it moving. 1577 01:09:19,446 --> 01:09:20,865 All right, everyone, listen up. 1578 01:09:20,948 --> 01:09:22,158 Oh, we're still listening to this guy? 1579 01:09:22,241 --> 01:09:24,702 Yes, we are. Let's get you two out on the porch, 1580 01:09:24,785 --> 01:09:26,787 make sure your parents left, and David, help me with the body. 1581 01:09:26,871 --> 01:09:28,998 -Fine. -Okay. I'll make snacks. 1582 01:09:38,799 --> 01:09:40,885 Everyone looks the same from up here. 1583 01:09:40,968 --> 01:09:44,054 Just look for two people with a big height difference. 1584 01:09:46,682 --> 01:09:49,476 -You okay? -No, I'm not, I... 1585 01:09:51,353 --> 01:09:54,940 I have had to do so much to be a part of your family, 1586 01:09:55,024 --> 01:09:56,650 and he just gets to waltz into mine. 1587 01:09:56,734 --> 01:09:58,611 -It is-- -Not fair. 1588 01:09:58,694 --> 01:10:01,614 Yeah, I mean, he's literally had to do nothing. 1589 01:10:01,697 --> 01:10:05,242 [Abby] Yeah, David is a... 1590 01:10:05,326 --> 01:10:06,702 [sighs] 1591 01:10:09,038 --> 01:10:11,874 The thing about David is 1592 01:10:11,957 --> 01:10:15,377 he hasn't had to do nearly as much as he's had to do, 1593 01:10:15,461 --> 01:10:18,797 but when he cares about somebody and I've seen how much he cares about you, 1594 01:10:18,881 --> 01:10:22,009 he would do literally anything. 1595 01:10:22,092 --> 01:10:23,385 I mean, look at tonight. 1596 01:10:23,469 --> 01:10:25,638 He's basically conspiring murder for Adam. 1597 01:10:25,721 --> 01:10:28,557 He likes you way more than he likes Adam. 1598 01:10:28,641 --> 01:10:31,393 -Well-- -We all do. 1599 01:10:31,477 --> 01:10:32,770 [laughter] 1600 01:10:34,438 --> 01:10:36,690 [Abby] Oh, oh! That's them! They're leaving! 1601 01:10:36,774 --> 01:10:37,650 They're leaving! 1602 01:10:37,733 --> 01:10:38,901 -That's our cue. -Hmm? 1603 01:10:38,984 --> 01:10:40,611 -That's our cue! -Okay. 1604 01:10:43,113 --> 01:10:44,281 -Hey, dumb ass. -Huh? 1605 01:10:44,365 --> 01:10:46,367 -78th Street. -78th Street. 1606 01:10:46,450 --> 01:10:49,912 [Jordan] Hey, dumbass, come on. Get some-- Ready? 1607 01:10:49,995 --> 01:10:51,497 1...2... 1608 01:10:51,580 --> 01:10:55,209 [grunting, groaning] 1609 01:10:55,292 --> 01:10:56,585 Bruh, hit the button. 1610 01:10:59,046 --> 01:11:00,506 -Could you-- -You're right there. 1611 01:11:00,589 --> 01:11:02,174 [David] I know, I know, it's just, in my head 1612 01:11:02,258 --> 01:11:04,468 I made this promise with God that if he helped us get through 1613 01:11:04,551 --> 01:11:06,595 the night, I'd keep shops for the rest of my life, 1614 01:11:06,679 --> 01:11:10,057 and that means no electricity. 1615 01:11:10,140 --> 01:11:12,017 -Man, for real? -Yeah. 1616 01:11:12,101 --> 01:11:14,270 -Push the fucking button. -Okay. 1617 01:11:14,353 --> 01:11:16,981 [grunting, struggling] 1618 01:11:17,064 --> 01:11:19,483 I'm not lifting with my back at all! 1619 01:11:19,566 --> 01:11:24,822 [grunting, struggling] 1620 01:11:24,905 --> 01:11:26,657 Mrs. Grundwerg. 1621 01:11:26,740 --> 01:11:28,242 [Grundwerg] Do I have any mail? 1622 01:11:28,325 --> 01:11:31,412 Um, already dropped it off. Here you go. 1623 01:11:35,040 --> 01:11:36,500 Good evening. 1624 01:11:39,169 --> 01:11:41,839 You wait here. I'm going to get the cart. 1625 01:11:41,922 --> 01:11:44,383 Try not to look so suspicious. Jesus! 1626 01:11:48,387 --> 01:11:50,514 [wheels rumbling on cement] 1627 01:11:57,271 --> 01:11:58,731 -Jordan! -Aah! 1628 01:11:58,814 --> 01:12:01,275 Garbage day is not until Sunday. 1629 01:12:01,358 --> 01:12:02,568 It's not Sunday? 1630 01:12:02,651 --> 01:12:04,403 -No, it is not Sunday. -Oh. 1631 01:12:04,486 --> 01:12:07,281 -Why are you here so early? -Going to eat in the lobby. 1632 01:12:07,364 --> 01:12:08,907 You don't want to chill in the park? 1633 01:12:08,991 --> 01:12:12,202 -No. -Right, okay. 1634 01:12:12,995 --> 01:12:14,580 Let me get that for you. 1635 01:12:22,296 --> 01:12:26,050 Uh, Cano, do you think you can, uh, 1636 01:12:26,133 --> 01:12:28,177 watch the front door while you eat? 1637 01:12:28,260 --> 01:12:30,054 9A called about their-- their... 1638 01:12:30,137 --> 01:12:32,014 -Yes, sure. -Oh, thank-- 1639 01:12:32,097 --> 01:12:33,557 Jordan? 1640 01:12:33,640 --> 01:12:35,100 [door creaks] 1641 01:12:36,393 --> 01:12:37,603 Yeah? 1642 01:12:38,395 --> 01:12:40,522 What is that thing on your head? 1643 01:12:49,365 --> 01:12:50,949 It's Shabbos, baby. 1644 01:12:58,874 --> 01:13:00,167 [door opens] 1645 01:13:01,919 --> 01:13:03,253 [Ellen and Adam gasp] 1646 01:13:03,337 --> 01:13:05,297 -Why are you back? -They're back? 1647 01:13:05,381 --> 01:13:07,049 Uh...Cano was early. 1648 01:13:07,132 --> 01:13:08,258 Shit. 1649 01:13:08,342 --> 01:13:10,010 So that's it. We're screwed, right? 1650 01:13:10,094 --> 01:13:11,970 David, what-- What do you think? 1651 01:13:12,054 --> 01:13:13,889 -Jordan? I'm sorry. -All good, all good. 1652 01:13:13,972 --> 01:13:16,350 Why are you telling Jordan you're sorry? He's fine. 1653 01:13:16,433 --> 01:13:17,768 Adam's the one who's gonna be in trouble. 1654 01:13:17,851 --> 01:13:19,103 -That's it, prison. -I mean... 1655 01:13:19,186 --> 01:13:20,437 I'm gonna go to prison. 1656 01:13:20,521 --> 01:13:22,272 I don't think you're gonna be the only one. 1657 01:13:25,359 --> 01:13:26,402 Hey, what are you doing? 1658 01:13:26,485 --> 01:13:28,320 -I'm calling the police. -No, no, no. 1659 01:13:28,404 --> 01:13:30,489 -No, you're not-- -Stop! Stop. 1660 01:13:30,572 --> 01:13:32,699 I should call the cops, turn myself in, 1661 01:13:32,783 --> 01:13:34,159 at least have a little bit of dignity. 1662 01:13:34,243 --> 01:13:36,203 -Whoa, whoa, whoa. Adam! -What! 1663 01:13:36,286 --> 01:13:37,871 I'm the black sheep of the family. 1664 01:13:37,955 --> 01:13:39,540 Everyone knows I don't have much of a future anyway. 1665 01:13:39,832 --> 01:13:41,583 -Stop it. That's not true. -That is nonsense! 1666 01:13:41,667 --> 01:13:43,293 Yeah, there's lots of things that you can-- 1667 01:13:43,377 --> 01:13:45,129 [crying] I was rejected from the IDF! 1668 01:13:49,216 --> 01:13:54,847 I just needed something to talk about at the table every week, 1669 01:13:54,930 --> 01:13:58,892 so I didn't feel like a complete loser. 1670 01:13:58,976 --> 01:14:00,602 But there's lots of things you can do. 1671 01:14:00,686 --> 01:14:02,020 You can sing the aleph bet. 1672 01:14:02,104 --> 01:14:03,981 You work out with those calisthenics in your room. 1673 01:14:04,064 --> 01:14:05,315 -Yes, yes! -Mom? Dad? 1674 01:14:05,399 --> 01:14:06,525 -It's true. -Dad! 1675 01:14:06,608 --> 01:14:07,901 [Richard] What? What? 1676 01:14:09,027 --> 01:14:11,238 If I can't defend Israel... 1677 01:14:14,199 --> 01:14:16,994 then at least I can take the fall for us. 1678 01:14:17,077 --> 01:14:19,496 Stop it. This is my fault. 1679 01:14:19,580 --> 01:14:21,165 I should have broken up with him forever ago. 1680 01:14:21,248 --> 01:14:22,833 I just-- 1681 01:14:22,916 --> 01:14:24,960 didn't want to hear everyone tell me how wrong I was. 1682 01:14:25,043 --> 01:14:26,712 It should be me. 1683 01:14:26,795 --> 01:14:28,338 I should never have let things go this far. 1684 01:14:28,422 --> 01:14:32,176 You know, I have my readings and my conflict resolution seminars, 1685 01:14:32,259 --> 01:14:33,886 but when the time came to act, 1686 01:14:33,969 --> 01:14:35,554 I couldn't find the words that you kids needed. 1687 01:14:35,637 --> 01:14:38,056 -No! -I just-- 1688 01:14:38,140 --> 01:14:41,477 I'll tell the police I did it. I put in the laxatives. 1689 01:14:41,560 --> 01:14:45,022 I was mad at that boy for being mean to my son, 1690 01:14:45,105 --> 01:14:47,316 so I poisoned him, and I should pay the price. 1691 01:14:47,399 --> 01:14:48,567 -No. But Mom-- -Mom. 1692 01:14:48,650 --> 01:14:50,402 No, I deserve it anyway. 1693 01:14:50,486 --> 01:14:52,070 Meg... 1694 01:14:52,154 --> 01:14:54,281 the way I've treated you, 1695 01:14:54,364 --> 01:14:55,782 and then seeing you tonight, 1696 01:14:55,866 --> 01:14:59,036 and the way that you've helped. 1697 01:14:59,119 --> 01:15:01,997 I just want you to know that no amount of conversion 1698 01:15:02,080 --> 01:15:05,918 will change the fact that you're already a part of this family. 1699 01:15:08,128 --> 01:15:10,130 [Adam] Jordan? 1700 01:15:10,214 --> 01:15:11,590 -Plan B! -What! 1701 01:15:11,673 --> 01:15:13,425 -No, no, no, no! -Jordan! Jordan! 1702 01:15:13,509 --> 01:15:14,593 [all chaotically shouting] 1703 01:15:15,010 --> 01:15:16,637 Jordan, don't! 1704 01:15:16,720 --> 01:15:19,515 No, it's okay. I'm gonna get him in the garbage cart. 1705 01:15:19,598 --> 01:15:23,143 What?! Jordan! No, no, no, no, no, no! 1706 01:15:23,227 --> 01:15:25,604 Go, go, go, go, go, go! 1707 01:15:25,687 --> 01:15:27,064 Steph Curry! 1708 01:15:27,147 --> 01:15:28,023 [Thud] 1709 01:15:28,106 --> 01:15:30,234 [all groaning] 1710 01:15:30,317 --> 01:15:32,736 Ooh... 1711 01:15:32,819 --> 01:15:33,987 Um... 1712 01:15:36,156 --> 01:15:38,492 I think it's time to call an ambulance. 1713 01:15:43,455 --> 01:15:45,165 What the hell is that? 1714 01:15:48,460 --> 01:15:49,962 We just got here. 1715 01:15:56,510 --> 01:15:59,846 We're all horrible. 1716 01:16:01,848 --> 01:16:04,685 Maybe we should all go to prison together. 1717 01:16:07,646 --> 01:16:09,606 We should probably start getting our story straight. 1718 01:16:09,690 --> 01:16:11,900 [Adam] I don't really care. 1719 01:16:11,984 --> 01:16:14,278 [police sirens approaching] 1720 01:16:14,361 --> 01:16:16,280 [police radio chatter] 1721 01:16:26,957 --> 01:16:29,084 [three knocks at the door] 1722 01:16:31,420 --> 01:16:32,838 I'll get it. 1723 01:16:41,263 --> 01:16:42,556 [officer] Mr. Gelfand? 1724 01:16:42,639 --> 01:16:45,392 Ah, yes. Good to see you, officers. 1725 01:16:45,475 --> 01:16:48,228 Um, is there a place we can talk? 1726 01:16:48,312 --> 01:16:50,731 Yeah, sure. Right-- right this way. 1727 01:16:59,906 --> 01:17:02,993 [Richard] As head of the household, officer, I should say that-- 1728 01:17:03,076 --> 01:17:06,622 [officer] No, hold on. I understand this must be traumatic for all of you, 1729 01:17:06,705 --> 01:17:10,083 but it's protocol that we pull you each aside for questioning. 1730 01:17:10,167 --> 01:17:12,461 But before that happens... 1731 01:17:15,172 --> 01:17:18,091 we found this in the victim's pocket. 1732 01:17:18,175 --> 01:17:20,135 We have to keep this for evidence, 1733 01:17:20,218 --> 01:17:23,555 but I think it's only right that you get to hear it firsthand 1734 01:17:23,639 --> 01:17:25,557 and not from some reporter. 1735 01:17:25,641 --> 01:17:27,434 That would be good. 1736 01:17:27,517 --> 01:17:30,103 "Every weekend for the past year, 1737 01:17:30,187 --> 01:17:32,022 I've witnessed something beautiful... 1738 01:17:32,105 --> 01:17:34,316 -[typing] -5 family members who barely get along. 1739 01:17:34,399 --> 01:17:37,486 But no matter how much they're fighting, 1740 01:17:37,569 --> 01:17:40,656 they still come together every Friday night. 1741 01:17:40,739 --> 01:17:44,910 We stick together, whether we're in New York or Ethiopia. 1742 01:17:44,993 --> 01:17:48,705 I'm sorry to do this on this special night, 1743 01:17:48,789 --> 01:17:51,792 but all the stress finally got to me. 1744 01:17:51,875 --> 01:17:55,462 You know what they say. Running the bank is hard work. 1745 01:17:57,422 --> 01:18:00,300 Sincerely, Benjamin." 1746 01:18:00,384 --> 01:18:01,802 [paper pulls out] 1747 01:18:06,848 --> 01:18:08,392 [mouthing silently] Plan "C." 1748 01:18:10,811 --> 01:18:11,978 There he goes. 1749 01:18:38,380 --> 01:18:40,424 [dramatic musical flourish] 1750 01:18:42,634 --> 01:18:44,636 [woman] I'm so sorry. 1751 01:18:44,720 --> 01:18:48,223 I worked with Benji, and he was so funny and such a good guy. 1752 01:18:48,306 --> 01:18:49,850 Hmm. 1753 01:18:49,933 --> 01:18:53,520 He was so sweet and always made me feel so comfortable in the office. 1754 01:18:53,603 --> 01:18:58,650 And he was really so funny and really just-- oh, God, 1755 01:18:58,734 --> 01:19:00,610 I'm so sorry. 1756 01:19:00,694 --> 01:19:02,112 Yeah. 1757 01:19:04,406 --> 01:19:06,032 Hi, Adam. 1758 01:19:13,248 --> 01:19:16,251 -She was the one who slept with-- -I know. 1759 01:19:16,334 --> 01:19:18,086 [Meg] You know why it's called a Shiva? 1760 01:19:18,170 --> 01:19:19,755 [David] Because it's a Shiva? 1761 01:19:19,838 --> 01:19:23,049 [Meg] No, it's because Shiva means 7 in Hebrew, 1762 01:19:23,133 --> 01:19:26,636 and it's supposed to last for 7 days. 1763 01:19:26,720 --> 01:19:31,725 You know, um, if you don't want to take the classes, 1764 01:19:31,808 --> 01:19:33,310 you really don't have to. 1765 01:19:35,812 --> 01:19:40,025 [kissing] 1766 01:19:40,108 --> 01:19:41,401 When do I get one of those? 1767 01:19:41,485 --> 01:19:42,903 I don't think you can. 1768 01:19:42,986 --> 01:19:44,362 I'm gonna keep going till I get one. 1769 01:19:44,446 --> 01:19:45,739 [John] Hello there. 1770 01:19:45,822 --> 01:19:47,365 -Mom, Dad, hi! -Hi, honey. 1771 01:19:47,449 --> 01:19:49,910 John, Beth, what are you... 1772 01:19:49,993 --> 01:19:52,204 We just wanted to come by and offer our condolences. 1773 01:19:52,287 --> 01:19:53,330 [Ellen] Oh, okay. 1774 01:19:53,413 --> 01:19:57,167 And to apologize for leaving early on Friday night. 1775 01:19:57,250 --> 01:19:58,335 Oh, that's all right. 1776 01:19:58,418 --> 01:20:01,838 Look, um, we don't remember that night too well. 1777 01:20:01,922 --> 01:20:05,425 -Oh, it was so hectic. -Oh, yeah, it was. 1778 01:20:05,509 --> 01:20:12,098 Mm-hmm. But I definitely do not recall meeting a Caucasian Benjamin. 1779 01:20:19,064 --> 01:20:20,690 I want Thanksgiving. 1780 01:20:22,150 --> 01:20:23,109 What? 1781 01:20:23,193 --> 01:20:28,573 I get Meg and David for Thanksgiving every year. 1782 01:20:29,407 --> 01:20:31,618 I hear Wisconsin is beautiful in the fall. 1783 01:20:31,701 --> 01:20:33,245 -[John] You're gonna love it. -Yeah. 1784 01:20:33,328 --> 01:20:36,623 And Christmas and Easter. 1785 01:20:38,542 --> 01:20:41,127 But sometimes Christmas and Hanukkah overlap. 1786 01:20:41,211 --> 01:20:43,755 Hanukkah's eight days. You'll manage. 1787 01:20:43,839 --> 01:20:47,133 But we'll lose some days for travel, especially with snow that time of year. 1788 01:20:47,217 --> 01:20:50,178 Ellen, Ellen, Ellen... enough. 1789 01:20:50,262 --> 01:20:52,180 -Okay? Okay. -Okay, okay. 1790 01:20:58,687 --> 01:20:59,896 Now, that's chutzpah. 1791 01:20:59,980 --> 01:21:01,273 [Ellen] Oh, yeah. 1792 01:21:02,649 --> 01:21:05,610 I think they'll make good in-laws. 1793 01:21:05,694 --> 01:21:09,322 [upbeat music rises] 1794 01:21:11,408 --> 01:21:13,577 -Mom! Dad! -Oh! 1795 01:21:13,660 --> 01:21:15,245 -Can we please go? -She's been waiting. 1796 01:21:15,328 --> 01:21:16,705 -She's always yelling. -Stop. 1797 01:21:16,788 --> 01:21:19,040 It's just like-- Can't she just like... 1798 01:21:21,126 --> 01:21:23,461 [Ernest Ernie and the Sincerities' "Count on Me" playing] 1799 01:21:27,883 --> 01:21:32,762 ♪ When there's trouble And there's bound to be ♪ 1800 01:21:32,846 --> 01:21:37,392 ♪ Don't you worry, you can count on me ♪ 1801 01:21:37,475 --> 01:21:40,770 ♪ And when that storm Has drifted out to sea... ♪ 1802 01:21:40,854 --> 01:21:41,897 Shame about that boy. 1803 01:21:41,980 --> 01:21:45,025 -Oh, terrible! Terrible! -Terrible. 1804 01:21:45,525 --> 01:21:47,027 Terrible thing. 1805 01:21:47,110 --> 01:21:48,403 Oh, boy. 1806 01:21:49,446 --> 01:21:53,992 ♪ When that storm is rolling in And there's nowhere to hide ♪ 1807 01:21:54,075 --> 01:21:55,952 ♪ I will be there... ♪ 1808 01:21:56,036 --> 01:21:58,663 Oh, you-- you never finished that joke you were telling me before. 1809 01:21:58,747 --> 01:22:00,790 -What joke? -The joke about the Rabbi-- 1810 01:22:00,874 --> 01:22:03,168 Oh, the Rabbi and the tent. Ah! 1811 01:22:03,251 --> 01:22:04,794 It's not such a good joke. 1812 01:22:05,295 --> 01:22:08,340 ♪ I will be there ♪ 1813 01:22:08,423 --> 01:22:12,802 ♪ And there'll be nights When you're fighting for your rights ♪ 1814 01:22:12,886 --> 01:22:16,640 ♪ And all your friends will walk away ♪ 1815 01:22:16,723 --> 01:22:18,850 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ 1816 01:22:18,934 --> 01:22:23,605 ♪ And you'll be strong As you had to be for so, so long ♪ 1817 01:22:23,688 --> 01:22:27,442 ♪ But I'll be there anyway ♪ 1818 01:22:27,525 --> 01:22:32,906 ♪ 'Cause when you're standing On crumbling ground ♪ 1819 01:22:32,989 --> 01:22:37,661 ♪ And the sky starts tumbling down ♪ 1820 01:22:37,744 --> 01:22:41,748 ♪ Well, I will always be around ♪ 1821 01:22:41,831 --> 01:22:45,043 ♪ You can count on me ♪ 1822 01:22:47,337 --> 01:22:50,423 ♪ You count on me ♪ 1823 01:22:54,552 --> 01:23:00,350 ♪ When you got to be discreet On your way through town ♪ 1824 01:23:00,433 --> 01:23:04,396 ♪ I will be there ♪ 1825 01:23:04,479 --> 01:23:07,524 ♪ And when they stop you On the street ♪ 1826 01:23:07,607 --> 01:23:10,527 ♪ Trying to break you down ♪ 1827 01:23:10,610 --> 01:23:13,446 ♪ I will be there ♪ 1828 01:23:13,530 --> 01:23:17,742 ♪ Now, ladies They'll attack you till you fall ♪ 1829 01:23:17,826 --> 01:23:20,704 ♪ Till you come undone ♪ 1830 01:23:20,787 --> 01:23:22,455 ♪ I will be there ♪ 1831 01:23:22,539 --> 01:23:24,916 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 1832 01:23:25,000 --> 01:23:28,712 ♪ Then when your back's against the wall ♪ 1833 01:23:28,795 --> 01:23:31,047 ♪ And there's nowhere And there's nowhere ♪ 1834 01:23:31,131 --> 01:23:33,758 -♪ Nowhere to run ♪ -♪ I will be there ♪ 1835 01:23:33,842 --> 01:23:38,304 ♪ Cause when you're standing On crumbling ground ♪ 1836 01:23:38,388 --> 01:23:44,060 ♪ Yeah, and the sky starts tumbling down ♪ 1837 01:23:44,144 --> 01:23:48,440 ♪ Well, I will always be around ♪ 1838 01:23:48,523 --> 01:23:52,777 ♪ You can count on me, yeah ♪ 1839 01:23:52,861 --> 01:23:54,362 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ 1840 01:23:54,446 --> 01:23:58,783 ♪ You can count on me, yeah ♪ 1841 01:23:58,867 --> 01:24:03,329 ♪ You can count on me ♪ 1842 01:24:03,413 --> 01:24:04,789 ♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ 1843 01:24:06,499 --> 01:24:08,126 ♪ Count on me... ♪