[man] Sector 5 harvesting will conclude in ten minutes.
- You heard him. Ten minutes.
[man] Deposit all crops before curfew.
[boss] Hurry up! No slacking!
Get back to work!
- Daniel, you dead idiot.
I told you to stay out of the deep end.
Dude, where you been?
- I got us a contract. - Fuck off!
- We're both about to fuck off.
Four years, and then we get
two acres of pristine beachfront O.C. property
as our reward.
- "The female has been assigned to domestic work.
"The male, food service."
We got to do four years of this shit?
- We've been stuck in these fields since we were kids.
Did you not hear what I said about beachfront property?
Once we're done, it's blue skies and yellow sands
for the rest of our lives.
- What about Adrian?
- Come on, Adrian? It doesn't mean anything.
We're just having a little fun.
- I know. We share a wall.
[Tobin] Do you two assholes ever shut up?
Don't have me report you.
- Mind your fucking business, Tobin!
- Don't make me shove this up your urethra, Tobin.
- No one even likes you! Why are you even talking?
- Come on, man.
We're packing our bags, and we're getting out.
- Do I get a say in this at all or what, huh?
- What are you gonna say, fuckhead?
That you're not interested in a better life?
That you don't want to be happy?
You seriously wanna spend the rest of your days
becoming shriveled up and useless like Tobin?
- I heard that.
- We wanted you to hear it! - She wanted you to hear it.
Okay, let's do it.
But you're finishing off our work
for the rest of the day.
- Done. Pick em up, fuckhead.
[distant laughter]
- Fuck. My head.
[John Doe] Quiet?
[groaning]
- Why are we here?
- We're okay.
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
He left a note.
"The astral nauts of store LIS004
"have left this ruined world
"to ascend to our new home on the two-ringed planet.
"I, Zachary, await an escape pod for my mortal flesh.
"Please do not move me."
See? They ascended. We're good.
Fine. I'll take out the leftovers.
Come on, Zach.
Oh, these bones feel like spaghetti.
You're lucky I got you out of Topeka.
Stone almost smoked your ass, right?
Ow! What's that for?
- I had him! That was my kill.
- Who, Stone? Are you delusional?
When I saw you, your car was sideways
and you were covered with blood.
Matter of fact, you're still bleeding.
- At least he's dead, right?
- Stone? Yeah.
Maybe.
Now that I think of it, no.
- What the fuck, John? - I was busy trying
to get your ass out of that amusement park alive.
The fact that we're both standing here,
I think I made the right call.
- That wasn't your call to make.
- Says the asshole who poisoned me.
- And I told you not to come back for me.
- Well, I ignored that. - Why?
- Because it was a stupid fucking thing to say.
- Well, you're fucking stupid.
- Well, so are you.
* Yeah *
- Do you think something's about to happen?
Because it definitely is.
- It's been a while since I-- - Why do you talk so much?
* One here comes the two to the three to the four *
* Like she a groupie and I ain't even on tour *
* Everybody in the club gettin' tipsy *
* Here comes the five to the four to the three *
* Hands in the air if you cats drunk as me *
Ugh! Ahh! Oh, nasty!
* Dude I don't care I'm a P-I-M-P *
* Everybody in the club gettin' tipsy *
[seagulls calling]
**
- [gasps] Giselle? You majestic bitch.
It has been forever. Mwah. Mwah.
Oh, my God, I love your earrings.
I treated myself to a new necklace too.
Idiot didn't finish her chores.
Oh, my God, I'm starving.
I want a number one, no bun, fries.
Atkins, right?
**
Hello!
I totally can see you holding the tray.
**
[slurping]
- May I have your attention, please?
Excuse me, everyone.
I was just informed there's an active shooter nearby.
[collective groan] Yes, another one.
Now, we're totally safe, but as a precaution,
we will be locking down.
Now until we get the all clear, please enjoy
endless Shooting Star fries on the house.
- Oh, my God, I totally will.
Yes.
- [Kerwin] How we doin', folks? - [customer] Good, thanks.
- Can I get you some more fries?
- [customer] That would be awesome.
**
[snoring]
- Well, that complicates things.
**
[sighing]
[bell ringing]
- Hey, you're awake.
Where are you going?
- I-I gotta go.
- Are you seriously going back to him?
- You don't understand.
Bye.
- Goddamn balls.
Next time you see Stone, he'll give you a bullet enema,
if you're lucky.
- Not if I give him one first.
- Yeah, like you'll get within ten miles of Officer Psychopath
after the shit you pulled.
[electricity crackling]
- What was that? - Shit.
We need to get inside right now.
That's a Watkyn's storm.
[screaming]
[electricity crackling]
- Well, bad ass, what's the plan?
Only a complete idiot would go out in this.
- Isn't that your car out there?
- Shit!
Oh, fuck!
Evelyn!
- Man, he runs weird.
[shouting]
- Ow! Jesus!
- Oh, Zachary.
That's why you shouldn't join cults.
[groaning]
[grunting]
- Oh, fuck me. Fell on my burn.
[grunting]
That's what I get for saving your life.
- Oh, thank you. [chuckling]
**
[indistinct chatter]
This is why I tell you to drink less water.
Just go.
[scoffs]
- I missed you too, little bunny.
You holding up okay?
No one even comes back here.
Come on. It's been three years.
Let me hear that annoying-ass voice of yours.
Please?
It's me.
See? They can't take everything away.
See? You're still the same annoying pest
who's great at slicing tree fruit
and even better at making Tobin feel like a piece of shit.
Hey. Hey.
Hey, when my manager isn't looking,
I fart on his lunch. Yeah.
Yeah, but I'm not talking, like, a one-cheek squeak.
I'm talking like a full, bullhorn fucking blast.
[laughing] There you are. There you are.
[Kerwin] Jesus, these morons.
I gotta do everything myself.
The hell are you two doing back here?
You're not allowed here.
Oh, your keeper's not gonna be happy.
- Don't touch her!
- Know your place!
How dare you speak--
[screaming]
Oh, we are not done.
- All of this is lies. Lies!
- It's okay, everyone.
Reaper should be here any moment.
I hope.
- You promised me! I gave you four years.
Where's my beach? My freedom?
That contract is bullshit! All of this is bullshit!
[gunshot]
[gasping]
[laughter]
[applause]
- Well, that was stressful. [laughs]
Anywho, lockdown's lifted. You're all free to go.
And, please, grab a Black Hole burger
for the road.
[chuckles]
Just you wait.
[wincing]
- Just give me the napkin.
- No, I don't want your help.
- You need it. - Do I?
I'll show you.
[humming]
[groaning]
- You've done this before, haven't you?
[grunts, chuckles]
[thunder crashes]
What is a Watkyn's storm, anyway?
- A nuclear plant in Watkyn's Harbor exploded
when the power went out,
poisoned the atmosphere.
The further east you go, the worse it gets,
so we just got to wait it out a while.
- How long is a while?
Oh, my God.
[thunder crashes]
- Oh, lucky shot. - Really?
You wanna make it interesting?
- Okay.
I sink it, I get to ask you whatever I want.
You sink it, same deal.
- Fine. You go first.
You fucker. [chuckles]
You played me. - Me? No!
That was just luck. But since you lost,
what's the coolest place you've ever been?
- Are you seriously not gonna ask me my first name?
- Oh, shit. Wait, no. - Nope!
Disneyland. - What's that?
- You never heard of Disneyland?
I went there when I was a kid.
Before the fall. Lots of kids did.
It had a castle, rides, princesses, Mickey Mouse.
- Why did this mouse have a name?
Why was he so special? - Excuse me.
Mickey was very cool.
He had a snappy little tux,
and he gave very good hugs, too.
- You hugged a giant mouse? That's disgusting.
I would never take a child to this land of monsters.
- It was the happiest place on earth, motherfucker.
Let me guess, the coolest place you've ever been
is up your own ass.
- Ah, ah, ah, play the game.
The Container Store.
- The Container Store? - Yes.
Picture a store full of plastic containers, dispensers,
big, small, all different colors.
When I get my own spot in New San Francisco,
everything is gonna have its own place to go.
- Do you own anything of value?
- Ah-- You already asked your question.
Now it's my turn.
[laughs]
- What do you mean you've never stepped in the ocean?
- Never have and never will.
- What? Why? - Ghosts.
The ghosts in the ocean?
- There aren't any fucking ghosts in the ocean!
- Have you ever been to the ocean?
It's dark, man. Look, the shadows
are the perfect breeding ground for spirits.
And, have you ever heard of ghost ships?
Who the fuck do you think are piloting those ships?
Dolphins? - You fucking dunce.
- You don't have to laugh, man. - Yes, I do.
That is the dumbest shit I've ever heard.
Next, you're gonna tell me you believe in
life on other planets.
Oh, fuck off! - Not aliens like this.
But come on, you mean to tell me
that you think we're the only ones in the whole universe?
Just us? It's a sad way of thinking, if you ask me.
- You'd rather believe in aliens?
- I rather believe we're not in it alone.
- Oh, well, we're not alone,
because, you know, ocean ghosts.
- Have you ever been to the bottom of the ocean,
or space? - Not lately.
- So you don't know what's out there, do you?
- I'll give you that. - Thank you.
- I never saw a Watkyn's storm before today, obviously.
- But I've never seen a llama and a goat
in the same room at the same time.
And if we're being honest...
[both] I think they're the same animal.
- I've never broken my arm.
- I've never ridden a bicycle.
- I've never seen snow.
- I've never seen a baby pigeon.
- I've never fucked in a ball pit... twice.
[thunder crashes]
- Neither have I.
* Burgers and fries and chips and pies *
* It was simple and good back then *
[moaning, grunting]
- Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. The other way.
Left, left.
[screaming]
Oh my God! Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
[laughing]
You know what it was?
It was that motherfucker's teeth, you know?
Like they would have been okay on somebody else's face,
a bigger face.
Anyway, Adrian was the last person
that I had sex with, and it just wasn't very good.
- What, the teeth got in the way?
- Think about it. - Oh!
- Yes, they did. [laughing]
[thunder crashes]
Hey, you were right.
I should have thanked you. - Thank me for what?
Saving your ass or crushing that ass?
- Gross!
[laughing]
- Look, I was thinking, um--
- Oh, I'm sorry,
is John Doe the motor mouth actually tongue tied?
Oh, my goodness.
Come on, man, spit it out!
You're giving me blue balls.
- You should come with me.
- What? - Do this delivery with me.
Look, the only reason we've made it this far
is because we've had each other.
- I can't. - No, we could be partners.
- Partners?
What would I get out of being your partner?
- What would you get?
You'd get this.
This delivery gets me into New San Francisco.
It could get you in, too.
You can have a better life on the inside.
Security, safety. - No.
I've been on the inside. I know what it's like.
- No, no, no. New San Francisco is different than the O.C.
- You don't know that. - I do.
I've seen it with my own eyes.
- You really think you know everything, don't you?
- Well, in this case, I do. [sighing]
- I can't come with you.
- Okay. Okay, okay, okay,
look, even if you go back to Stone,
and even if you succeed in killing him,
which you won't, by the way-- - Fuck you, I won't.
- There'll always be another Stone,
and another and another. Trust me, it's not worth it.
- You don't understand.
- Look, I spent decades dealing with guys just like Stone.
You think he's the only crazy asshole out here?
I don't want that life anymore.
That's why I'm doing this, to find a better one.
- There's nothing better!
I tried to find something better,
and I got my brother killed.
- Look, you're carrying too much,
the jacket, your guilt.
You can't carry around t-the burden of your brother
for the rest of your life!
- Well, that's easy for you to say.
You never had a brother. You never had anyone.
- Well, at least I'm not a stubborn asshole
with a death wish because she's feeling sorry for herself.
- I don't feel sorry for myself.
- Well, you could've fooled me.
- You know what? I don't fuckin' need this.
As soon as that storm's over, I'm gone.
- Fine, you're slowing me down anyway!
What are you looking at?
- No, no, no.
- So I'm sick of looking at your shitty face!
[grunting]
But first, for my collection.
[screaming]
[chuckling]
[whimpering]
Good.
He's all yours.
What the?
[gagging]
- I'm-I'm not leaving without you...
fuckhead.
- Thanks, little bunny.
- I wanted a better life for us,
and this isn't it.
Let's go find one.
**
[thunder crackling]
- Stop moving!
- I can't get comfortable.
[rustling]
Stop moving!
- I can't sleep because of you!
Go to sleep!
- I'm hungry.
[thunder rumbling]
**
[gasping]
Cocksucker.
Fucking piece of shit! Goddammit!
Fuck you, you stupid motherfucker.
Piece of dog shit! God!
Oh!
Fucking piece of shit.
God, come on.
Fuck!
Goddammit, why won't this shit work?
- The gas must be out.
[sighing]
I can help.
- I don't need your help. Fuck.
- You don't have to carry that alone.
- Watch me.
- Come on, you're gonna hurt yourself. Let--
- I said, I got it!
- Quiet, you have to let go.
- I can't just let go, John.
- Yes, you can.
[sobbing] - I can't.
**
- How is it?
- It's good. - Yeah?
- Yours?
- I'm eatin' the same thing as you.
[chuckling]
- You were right.
We are not alone.
- Told you.
* From this moment *
* how can I feel *
* this small *
[birds chirping]
Damn.
Hello, Zachary.
Fucking dork.
- Hey, Sleeping Beauty,
I thought we were on a timeline.
- Oh, it's "we" now? - Don't make it weird.
- Anything you say, partner.
So, New Chicago? - New Chicago.
**