1 00:00:00,984 --> 00:00:02,978 Gooooood morning, Mrs. Howard. 2 00:00:03,078 --> 00:00:04,687 I mean "Good morning." I know you told me 3 00:00:04,772 --> 00:00:07,210 not to elongate my vowels before we're in school. 4 00:00:07,373 --> 00:00:09,453 - Good morning, Janine. - Good morning. 5 00:00:09,728 --> 00:00:11,249 - So ‐‐ - Ms. Howard? 6 00:00:11,671 --> 00:00:13,176 Yes? Ms. Howard! 7 00:00:13,260 --> 00:00:15,851 It is you! Yo! 8 00:00:15,970 --> 00:00:18,176 I would have thought you would have retired by now! 9 00:00:18,260 --> 00:00:20,265 Yo, I just dropped off my nephew and ‐‐ 10 00:00:20,350 --> 00:00:22,226 Yo, you was always my favorite teacher, 11 00:00:22,310 --> 00:00:23,750 and I never got a chance to thank you 12 00:00:23,835 --> 00:00:25,752 for everything you did for me back in kindergarten. 13 00:00:25,836 --> 00:00:28,792 Aw, sweetheart, you don't have to thank me for that. 14 00:00:28,877 --> 00:00:30,053 You did this. 15 00:00:30,138 --> 00:00:31,804 Of course I need to thank you. 16 00:00:31,889 --> 00:00:34,056 Before I was in your class, everyone would have been like, 17 00:00:34,140 --> 00:00:36,806 "Oh, he's gon' be the one that needs to be secured." 18 00:00:36,897 --> 00:00:39,773 But thanks to you, I'm out here securing. 19 00:00:39,858 --> 00:00:43,867 Well, I am very proud of you. 20 00:00:44,288 --> 00:00:46,102 By the way, how is your mother? 21 00:00:46,187 --> 00:00:47,206 Well, that's complicated, 22 00:00:47,290 --> 00:00:49,206 but it's gon' mean so much to my moms 23 00:00:49,290 --> 00:00:50,836 that Ms. Howard asked after her. 24 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:53,336 Well, sweetheart, it was so good to see you, 25 00:00:53,420 --> 00:00:55,386 and have a great rest of your day. 26 00:00:55,470 --> 00:00:56,506 You, too, Ms. Howard. Alright. 27 00:00:56,590 --> 00:00:57,716 You, too. Bye. 28 00:00:57,800 --> 00:00:59,550 Bye. 29 00:01:00,622 --> 00:01:03,248 See, Mrs. Howard? That is why we do this. 30 00:01:03,347 --> 00:01:04,803 Mold those young minds. 31 00:01:04,888 --> 00:01:07,421 Just create new lives, make those connections. 32 00:01:07,506 --> 00:01:08,842 That ‐‐ Sweetheart, I have no idea 33 00:01:08,927 --> 00:01:10,713 who that young man was. 34 00:01:10,798 --> 00:01:12,264 Morning. 35 00:01:12,437 --> 00:01:14,445 Maker's "Hold'em" playing... *ABBOTT'S ELEMENTARY* 36 00:01:14,536 --> 00:01:16,536 *ABBOTT'S ELEMENTARY* Season 01 Episode 05 37 00:01:16,621 --> 00:01:18,148 Episode Title: "Student Transfer" Aired on: January 25, 2022. 38 00:01:22,365 --> 00:01:24,351 Subtitles Synchronized by srjanapala 39 00:01:28,056 --> 00:01:32,125 Well, it looks like a classic Schemmenti good mood day. 40 00:01:32,210 --> 00:01:34,426 You know it! I got my favorite parking spot, 41 00:01:34,510 --> 00:01:36,426 my macchiato is on point, 42 00:01:36,510 --> 00:01:38,136 and my neighbor finally found her cat, 43 00:01:38,220 --> 00:01:40,596 so no more hearing her cry through the walls. 44 00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:42,726 Jacob, are you ready? 45 00:01:42,810 --> 00:01:44,726 I am not just ready, 46 00:01:44,810 --> 00:01:46,686 - I am set and go. - Yes. 47 00:01:46,770 --> 00:01:48,646 Ready for what? What's going on? 48 00:01:48,730 --> 00:01:50,356 We have this little tradition where we read 49 00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:52,186 our Grades for Teachers reviews out loud 50 00:01:52,270 --> 00:01:53,776 when a new one comes in. 51 00:01:53,860 --> 00:01:55,986 Mine are always just incredibly flattering. 52 00:01:56,070 --> 00:01:57,316 There's a Yelp for teachers? 53 00:01:57,400 --> 00:01:59,326 Yeah. Do you want me to help you set up a page? 54 00:01:59,410 --> 00:02:00,826 Because as it says here, 55 00:02:00,910 --> 00:02:03,996 I am excellent at explaining complicated ideas. 56 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:06,626 Oh, no, thanks. That just sounds bad. 57 00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:07,916 Hmm. 58 00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,286 Oh... Oh, dang. Found a new one. 59 00:02:09,370 --> 00:02:10,920 - Okay, okay. - Mm‐hmm. 60 00:02:13,246 --> 00:02:14,163 What's wrong? 61 00:02:14,248 --> 00:02:15,755 Uh, it's... it's nothing. 62 00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:18,466 I just got a C‐minus review, 63 00:02:18,550 --> 00:02:20,966 which will bring down my overall average 64 00:02:21,050 --> 00:02:23,596 and tarnish my reputation forever, 65 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:25,636 you know? It's like... It's no big deal, though. 66 00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:27,476 Well, if traditions were always easy, 67 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:28,686 everyone would have them. 68 00:02:28,770 --> 00:02:30,516 Everyone does. 69 00:02:30,600 --> 00:02:32,476 "Nice but lacks experience 70 00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:35,236 compared to the other second grade teacher at Abbott." 71 00:02:35,320 --> 00:02:38,196 Hey, that's me. The other second grade teacher at Abbott. 72 00:02:38,280 --> 00:02:39,986 This isn't that bad. 73 00:02:40,070 --> 00:02:41,486 One of my reviews was so rude, 74 00:02:41,570 --> 00:02:43,366 the superintendent had to come check on me at home. 75 00:02:43,450 --> 00:02:45,826 Yeah, well, that's you, though. I don't get bad reviews. 76 00:02:45,910 --> 00:02:47,326 You just did. 77 00:02:47,410 --> 00:02:48,826 Girl, please, stop. 78 00:02:48,910 --> 00:02:50,496 You're gonna make me spit my coffee out. 79 00:02:50,580 --> 00:02:53,166 Okay, look, ignore this. Reviews on a poorly designed website 80 00:02:53,250 --> 00:02:54,836 do not determine what kind of teacher you are. 81 00:02:54,920 --> 00:02:56,716 Yeah, no. No, I just can't believe 82 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:59,636 the entire world can read that I'm a bad teacher. 83 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:01,846 Hey, kid, listen. There's nothing wrong 84 00:03:01,930 --> 00:03:03,556 with having some room for improvement. 85 00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:05,306 Just take it from me, 86 00:03:05,390 --> 00:03:07,846 the other, better, more experienced teacher at Abbott. 87 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:13,566 Melissa plays a lot. She jokes. 88 00:03:13,650 --> 00:03:15,276 You know? She's good at it. 89 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:18,066 Just another thing she's better at than me, 90 00:03:18,150 --> 00:03:20,066 according to the reviews. 91 00:03:20,616 --> 00:03:23,326 She's a regular Lucille Ball. 92 00:03:25,030 --> 00:03:27,366 Oh, hey, man. Can you tell me where I can find the mailboxes? 93 00:03:27,450 --> 00:03:29,076 Oh, I'll show you. No, you can just tell me. 94 00:03:29,160 --> 00:03:31,076 No, no, it's good. It's fine. We can walk together. 95 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:33,666 Oh, speaking of mail, can we talk USPS? 96 00:03:33,750 --> 00:03:35,706 Have you heard of informed delivery? 97 00:03:35,790 --> 00:03:38,216 What up, ol' curly head Arthur from PBS looking boy? 98 00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:40,546 And good morning to you, Raheem. 99 00:03:40,630 --> 00:03:42,216 You let them talk to you like that? 100 00:03:42,300 --> 00:03:44,596 Well, correct me if I'm wrong, but the boys and I are bonding 101 00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:46,394 in the tradition of playing the dozens. 102 00:03:46,487 --> 00:03:47,496 It's also called roasting. 103 00:03:47,580 --> 00:03:49,666 Also called, uh, blazing, frying. 104 00:03:49,751 --> 00:03:51,652 Hmm. Lot of cooking terminology. 105 00:03:51,746 --> 00:03:53,202 Look, man. I'm from Baltimore, okay? 106 00:03:53,286 --> 00:03:54,662 All I know is when somebody roasts you, 107 00:03:54,746 --> 00:03:56,162 you got to roast them back. 108 00:03:56,246 --> 00:03:57,672 Our teachers used to roast us. 109 00:03:57,756 --> 00:03:59,200 If they didn't, we wouldn't have respected them. 110 00:03:59,284 --> 00:04:00,321 You're just getting clowned. 111 00:04:00,405 --> 00:04:02,128 Of course I'm being clowned, okay? 112 00:04:02,465 --> 00:04:04,681 I don't know how to roast. It's not that hard. 113 00:04:04,765 --> 00:04:07,449 You just kind of have to take what people give you, like... 114 00:04:07,536 --> 00:04:10,072 You ol' mothball‐ sweater‐vest‐looking boy. 115 00:04:10,157 --> 00:04:12,243 Hmm. Simple yet cutting. 116 00:04:12,328 --> 00:04:14,097 - Mm‐hmm. - Okay. Thank you. 117 00:04:14,182 --> 00:04:16,268 I thought you had to bring way more to the table. 118 00:04:16,353 --> 00:04:17,810 In the Dean Martin celebrity roasts... 119 00:04:17,894 --> 00:04:19,650 Where are the mailboxes? 120 00:04:19,735 --> 00:04:22,231 Oh. Yeah. Come on. 121 00:04:22,316 --> 00:04:23,772 Alright, attendance time. 122 00:04:23,857 --> 00:04:26,988 So raise your hand if you're not here. 123 00:04:28,784 --> 00:04:30,950 Alright, so Nicole's not here. 124 00:04:32,206 --> 00:04:34,042 Janine, come to my office. 125 00:04:34,127 --> 00:04:35,753 - Ooh! - Ooh! 126 00:04:35,932 --> 00:04:37,848 Alright, everybody, uh, settle down. 127 00:04:37,933 --> 00:04:41,042 Okay, everyone's who's not here, please be good, alright? 128 00:04:41,127 --> 00:04:42,478 I'll be right back. 129 00:04:42,587 --> 00:04:44,917 - Mm‐hmm. - She'll be right back. 130 00:04:45,286 --> 00:04:47,912 Can she see me? 131 00:04:50,012 --> 00:04:51,199 Hey, girl. 132 00:04:51,284 --> 00:04:52,530 Hey, Ava. 133 00:04:52,668 --> 00:04:54,175 You know I can't just leave my classroom 134 00:04:54,259 --> 00:04:56,137 - unattended like this, right? - It's five minutes. 135 00:04:56,221 --> 00:04:57,871 It's not like something could go wrong in five minutes. 136 00:04:57,955 --> 00:05:00,211 A lot can go wrong, actually. 137 00:05:00,296 --> 00:05:02,502 If you say so. Anyway, one of Melissa's students 138 00:05:02,587 --> 00:05:04,066 will be transferring into your class. 139 00:05:04,151 --> 00:05:05,824 Really? Why? 140 00:05:05,909 --> 00:05:07,496 Girl, I don't know. Things happen all day. 141 00:05:07,580 --> 00:05:09,363 Maybe she wants to be closer to the bathroom. 142 00:05:09,448 --> 00:05:10,722 Maybe she like you more. 143 00:05:10,882 --> 00:05:12,824 Maybe she got some kind of Meek Mill‐Drake feud 144 00:05:12,909 --> 00:05:14,496 going on with one of her classmates. I don't know. 145 00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:15,972 Maybe she likes me better. 146 00:05:16,057 --> 00:05:17,724 If you really want to know, you should read her file. 147 00:05:17,808 --> 00:05:19,331 I have them arranged by sexiest dad. 148 00:05:19,416 --> 00:05:22,172 Her name is Courtney Pierce, and her daddy is "foine." 149 00:05:22,257 --> 00:05:23,941 No, that's okay. 150 00:05:24,026 --> 00:05:25,502 I don't really like to read the file. 151 00:05:25,587 --> 00:05:26,964 I like to get to know the child 152 00:05:27,049 --> 00:05:28,543 so I don't have any preconceived notions. 153 00:05:28,627 --> 00:05:31,363 That's an adorable spin on choosing to be unprepared. 154 00:05:31,448 --> 00:05:33,154 I wonder how Melissa's doing. 155 00:05:33,239 --> 00:05:35,325 Hope she's not taking this too hard. 156 00:05:35,410 --> 00:05:36,996 Find out right now. 157 00:05:37,081 --> 00:05:39,355 Melissa, Janine is on her way. 158 00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:41,669 You do know that that's coming out of all the speakers, 159 00:05:41,754 --> 00:05:43,591 not just a specific classroom, right? 160 00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:44,976 I said you're on your way. 161 00:05:46,646 --> 00:05:49,209 Looking like Ron Weasley 162 00:05:49,301 --> 00:05:50,731 if he was a pick‐up artist. 163 00:05:51,638 --> 00:05:54,111 This man look like he dream in podcasts. 164 00:05:56,318 --> 00:05:58,452 Well, look at you, 165 00:05:58,747 --> 00:06:00,811 ol' blue shirt, 166 00:06:00,896 --> 00:06:03,154 tan pants wearing guy. 167 00:06:04,996 --> 00:06:07,334 With your bright white shoes 168 00:06:07,419 --> 00:06:10,233 and the laces all tied up into a little bow? 169 00:06:10,318 --> 00:06:14,013 Yeah. No way those are accidentally falling off. 170 00:06:15,086 --> 00:06:16,922 Mr. Vampire Weekend, 171 00:06:17,107 --> 00:06:19,136 that really hurt my feelings. 172 00:06:22,766 --> 00:06:24,787 Raheem, I am... I am so sorry. 173 00:06:24,872 --> 00:06:26,138 You should be. 174 00:06:26,223 --> 00:06:27,731 With that Twilight‐shaped mouth! 175 00:06:27,816 --> 00:06:29,852 Got him! 176 00:06:29,936 --> 00:06:32,795 That's what we're all wearing. It's a uniform. 177 00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:35,572 You ain't even observant, dawg. 178 00:06:35,656 --> 00:06:38,139 They say the first year of teaching is the hardest. 179 00:06:38,224 --> 00:06:39,952 But... 180 00:06:40,138 --> 00:06:42,412 What about the second year? 181 00:06:42,496 --> 00:06:44,326 Minus $1 equals... 182 00:06:44,411 --> 00:06:45,709 Hey, Melissa. Hey. What? 183 00:06:45,794 --> 00:06:48,502 Uh, sorry. I know you talked to Ava, so this is awkward. 184 00:06:48,587 --> 00:06:50,292 Why would it be awkward? 185 00:06:50,376 --> 00:06:53,712 Oh, just the whole your student preferring me thing. 186 00:06:53,796 --> 00:06:55,896 Oh, yeah, no. Not awkward at all. Just, 187 00:06:55,981 --> 00:06:57,938 there's a couple things that you should know about Courtney 188 00:06:58,022 --> 00:06:59,772 before you take her into your class. I know you're more experienced 189 00:06:59,856 --> 00:07:00,833 than I am, 190 00:07:00,918 --> 00:07:02,964 but this transfer kind of proves 191 00:07:03,049 --> 00:07:04,835 I've got something special in my classroom 192 00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:06,880 that's got the kids a‐talkin'. 193 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:11,606 Courtney, come over here, hon. 194 00:07:11,910 --> 00:07:13,616 It's time for you to go with 195 00:07:13,723 --> 00:07:16,490 your very confident new teacher, Ms. Teagues. 196 00:07:16,575 --> 00:07:18,966 Why don't you go get your stuff? 197 00:07:19,051 --> 00:07:20,677 I'm like the Allen Iverson of teachers, 198 00:07:20,762 --> 00:07:22,841 and you're like that guy he stepped over once. 199 00:07:22,926 --> 00:07:25,208 You mean three‐time NBA champion Tyronn Lue? 200 00:07:25,364 --> 00:07:26,880 That guy? Yes, you know basketball, 201 00:07:26,996 --> 00:07:28,615 but my point is, 202 00:07:28,700 --> 00:07:30,616 maybe I'm not a bad teacher. 203 00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:32,747 Maybe you are. 204 00:07:32,891 --> 00:07:34,075 Okay. 205 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:35,746 Courtney, 206 00:07:36,112 --> 00:07:39,028 I want you to go and be your wonderful self 207 00:07:39,113 --> 00:07:41,536 with Ms. Teagues, okay? I have no doubt 208 00:07:41,621 --> 00:07:44,349 that you're gonna have a great time in her class. 209 00:07:44,434 --> 00:07:45,724 Alright. 210 00:07:46,110 --> 00:07:47,870 Have fun. 211 00:07:49,682 --> 00:07:51,236 Alright. 212 00:07:51,768 --> 00:07:55,064 Oh, look at you all, being so well‐behaved. 213 00:07:55,148 --> 00:07:57,474 Setting a great example for our new student. 214 00:07:57,558 --> 00:07:58,734 Hi, I'm Janine. 215 00:07:58,818 --> 00:08:00,524 - Hi, Janine. - Hi, Janine. 216 00:08:00,608 --> 00:08:02,854 Uh, no. She's not Janine. Her name is... 217 00:08:02,938 --> 00:08:04,364 My name is Janine Teagues. 218 00:08:04,448 --> 00:08:06,234 - Hi, Janine Teagues! - Hi, Janine Teagues! 219 00:08:06,318 --> 00:08:07,824 It's not Janine. 220 00:08:07,908 --> 00:08:09,510 Yes, it is. 221 00:08:09,595 --> 00:08:11,051 Courtney? 222 00:08:11,449 --> 00:08:13,665 One of the toughest students I've ever had. 223 00:08:13,835 --> 00:08:15,625 She's gonna eat Janine alive. 224 00:08:16,706 --> 00:08:19,354 Okay, everyone, please stand for the Pledge of Allegiance. 225 00:08:19,439 --> 00:08:22,111 Except for Andrew, who is taking a principled stand 226 00:08:22,196 --> 00:08:24,032 against nationalism. Yes. 227 00:08:24,116 --> 00:08:27,604 Alright. Everyone else? I... 228 00:08:27,786 --> 00:08:30,565 I pledge allegiance to the flag 229 00:08:30,650 --> 00:08:33,347 of the United States of Courtney. 230 00:08:33,432 --> 00:08:37,252 And to the Courtney for which it stands, 231 00:08:37,369 --> 00:08:41,782 one nation under Courtney, indivisible, 232 00:08:41,867 --> 00:08:45,869 with Courtney and Courtney for all. 233 00:08:47,541 --> 00:08:50,127 That's right! Nice job. 234 00:08:50,299 --> 00:08:52,339 That's right. Nice job. 235 00:08:52,424 --> 00:08:54,058 Courtney, go back to your seat. 236 00:08:54,143 --> 00:08:55,611 But I'm done with all my work. 237 00:08:55,696 --> 00:08:56,826 Go. 238 00:08:59,357 --> 00:09:02,073 Your next word is "smooth." Go, go, go. 239 00:09:06,076 --> 00:09:07,385 Done! 240 00:09:08,866 --> 00:09:11,282 "Rebble"? It's "ra‐bell." 241 00:09:14,666 --> 00:09:16,042 Courtney? 242 00:09:16,126 --> 00:09:18,162 Courtney, please stop. 243 00:09:18,246 --> 00:09:21,002 Courtney. Just... 244 00:09:21,086 --> 00:09:22,882 Hey. Hi. Can I help you? 245 00:09:22,966 --> 00:09:25,722 Yeah, I just stopped by to see how Courtney's doing. 246 00:09:25,807 --> 00:09:28,172 Oh, yeah, Courtney is thriving. 247 00:09:28,256 --> 00:09:30,105 Whole class is, actually. 248 00:09:30,190 --> 00:09:32,870 She was the missing piece to our little puzzle of learning. 249 00:09:32,955 --> 00:09:34,573 Oh. That's great to hear. 250 00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:36,480 I'm surprised you're not having any problems. 251 00:09:36,565 --> 00:09:38,143 Took me a couple of months to figure out 252 00:09:38,236 --> 00:09:39,793 how to keep her from disrupting the class. 253 00:09:39,877 --> 00:09:41,565 Look at you doing it in a couple of hours. 254 00:09:41,650 --> 00:09:43,168 I guess you really are 255 00:09:43,252 --> 00:09:44,946 the superior teacher. 256 00:09:51,246 --> 00:09:53,246 I'm teaching a lesson on gravity. 257 00:09:54,385 --> 00:09:55,900 Here's a little secret... 258 00:09:55,985 --> 00:09:57,886 Courtney didn't get transferred out of my class 259 00:09:57,971 --> 00:09:59,394 'cause I couldn't handle her. 260 00:09:59,479 --> 00:10:00,933 She got her parents to transfer her 261 00:10:01,018 --> 00:10:04,172 because I'd already caught on to all her little tricks. 262 00:10:04,299 --> 00:10:05,752 Most of them. 263 00:10:06,048 --> 00:10:08,389 Nobody could have seen that macaroni thing coming. 264 00:10:08,565 --> 00:10:10,486 So I said, "I'm not giving you a ride. 265 00:10:10,596 --> 00:10:12,597 I'm 'bout to drop you off at the airport of life." 266 00:10:12,682 --> 00:10:14,722 Oh, I know that's right. 267 00:10:14,806 --> 00:10:16,262 Hey, ladies. Sorry to interrupt. 268 00:10:16,346 --> 00:10:17,682 Uh, you mentioned earlier 269 00:10:17,766 --> 00:10:19,151 that there was a file on Courtney Pierce? 270 00:10:19,235 --> 00:10:21,651 Yeah. Thicker than a Snicker. Heavy like a Chevy. 271 00:10:21,736 --> 00:10:22,893 Ooh. Okay. 272 00:10:22,978 --> 00:10:24,734 Are you having issues with Courtney? 273 00:10:24,819 --> 00:10:26,135 Ah, I wouldn't say... 274 00:10:26,220 --> 00:10:27,447 She need help. 275 00:10:27,532 --> 00:10:29,463 Look at her. With that "I need help" face. 276 00:10:29,548 --> 00:10:31,714 Okay, this is not an "I need help" face. 277 00:10:31,799 --> 00:10:33,838 It is an "I have it under control" face 278 00:10:33,923 --> 00:10:35,999 and arm and leg and... 279 00:10:36,084 --> 00:10:38,893 And that is good, because I cannot help you. 280 00:10:38,978 --> 00:10:42,064 You see, Ava and I have placed a modest wager 281 00:10:42,149 --> 00:10:44,596 on your success with the whole Courtney situation, 282 00:10:44,747 --> 00:10:46,413 and I will not affect the outcome. 283 00:10:46,498 --> 00:10:48,385 Wait, hold on. You bet on me? 284 00:10:48,470 --> 00:10:49,744 Well, yeah. 285 00:10:49,829 --> 00:10:51,576 You guys are using my performance as a teacher 286 00:10:51,660 --> 00:10:53,025 for entertainment? 287 00:10:53,254 --> 00:10:55,065 Mm‐hmm. Okay, that's it. 288 00:10:55,150 --> 00:10:56,986 You know what? I'm taking everybody's money. 289 00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:00,815 Janine, you do know 290 00:11:00,900 --> 00:11:03,197 that that is not how bets work, right? 291 00:11:04,487 --> 00:11:07,073 Ava, I'm gonna need to see that file. 292 00:11:07,157 --> 00:11:09,413 Okay. You don't have to say it all determined. 293 00:11:09,497 --> 00:11:11,073 Nobody's stopping you from seeing the file. 294 00:11:11,157 --> 00:11:12,104 I offered it to you yesterday. 295 00:11:12,189 --> 00:11:14,385 Just go in the office and look. 296 00:11:14,470 --> 00:11:15,426 Okay. 297 00:11:20,023 --> 00:11:21,269 Hey, how's it going? 298 00:11:21,385 --> 00:11:22,975 It's... Yeah. 299 00:11:38,381 --> 00:11:40,637 "Psychological warfare?" 300 00:11:40,995 --> 00:11:43,701 "Could make a good cult leader someday. 301 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,412 Melissa Schemmenti." 302 00:11:45,497 --> 00:11:49,423 Well, I found Courtney's file, and it is substantial. 303 00:11:49,508 --> 00:11:52,044 Cannot believe Melissa didn't tell me any of this. 304 00:11:52,129 --> 00:11:54,925 But now that I'm informed, I can handle it. 305 00:11:55,010 --> 00:11:57,023 I'm just gonna have to communicate to Courtney 306 00:11:57,108 --> 00:11:59,423 that this behavior isn't okay. 307 00:11:59,649 --> 00:12:02,735 I bet no one's ever really tried to talk to her, you know? 308 00:12:03,022 --> 00:12:04,562 Meet her where she's at. 309 00:12:09,001 --> 00:12:10,986 Juice? 310 00:12:11,604 --> 00:12:13,979 Apple juice? Really? 311 00:12:14,711 --> 00:12:16,967 Okay. Um... 312 00:12:17,536 --> 00:12:20,455 Courtney, did you know the emotional center 313 00:12:20,599 --> 00:12:23,515 isn't actually in the heart but in the brain? 314 00:12:23,700 --> 00:12:25,246 Pass. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 315 00:12:25,340 --> 00:12:27,239 Okay. Sit down. Hold on. Alright. 316 00:12:28,093 --> 00:12:29,903 You're a leader, Courtney. 317 00:12:29,988 --> 00:12:31,314 And maybe that's something 318 00:12:31,399 --> 00:12:33,325 your other teachers didn't see about you, 319 00:12:33,410 --> 00:12:35,156 but I do. 320 00:12:35,241 --> 00:12:38,832 I know that when you tie your classmates' shoelaces together 321 00:12:38,917 --> 00:12:40,278 and tell them to dance, 322 00:12:40,363 --> 00:12:42,409 you're just looking for affirmation. 323 00:12:42,494 --> 00:12:45,684 And, Courtney, I will affirm you. 324 00:12:45,769 --> 00:12:48,365 We will sit down together, maybe do a puzzle... 325 00:12:48,450 --> 00:12:51,004 I bet you love puzzles as much as I do... 326 00:12:51,089 --> 00:12:55,215 and just work through some of those feelings together. 327 00:12:55,822 --> 00:12:57,238 Okay. 328 00:12:57,323 --> 00:12:58,823 Okay. 329 00:13:07,578 --> 00:13:10,106 I mean... 330 00:13:13,255 --> 00:13:15,726 So I reached out to her, you know? Sat her down. 331 00:13:15,811 --> 00:13:17,067 Because at the end of the day, 332 00:13:17,152 --> 00:13:18,569 teaching is just about communicating, 333 00:13:18,653 --> 00:13:20,399 and that's something I live by. 334 00:13:20,484 --> 00:13:21,513 I don't want to compare, but, like... 335 00:13:21,597 --> 00:13:22,859 Barbara, 336 00:13:22,955 --> 00:13:25,798 have you ever been roasted by your students? 337 00:13:25,891 --> 00:13:27,347 One, they're 5. 338 00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:29,478 Two, they respect me. 339 00:13:29,563 --> 00:13:32,127 Three, what would they even say? 340 00:13:32,212 --> 00:13:33,892 Mm. 341 00:13:34,348 --> 00:13:37,173 Hey, I need to talk. Like to a friend. 342 00:13:38,343 --> 00:13:40,430 You know how sometimes when you're being chased by a dog 343 00:13:40,514 --> 00:13:41,761 and you can't tell if it's playing 344 00:13:41,845 --> 00:13:43,851 - or if it's trying to bite you? - No. 345 00:13:43,936 --> 00:13:46,085 But at the same time, you don't want to stop running, 346 00:13:46,170 --> 00:13:48,452 because if it isn't playing, you're gonna get bit? 347 00:13:48,537 --> 00:13:50,323 Look, I tried roasting my students back, 348 00:13:50,408 --> 00:13:51,530 and it didn't work. 349 00:13:51,615 --> 00:13:54,460 It got way worse and oddly specific. 350 00:13:54,545 --> 00:13:55,995 Come on. It couldn't have been that bad. 351 00:13:56,079 --> 00:13:58,772 They called me "HuffPo‐reading gay Pete Buttigieg," 352 00:13:58,967 --> 00:14:01,437 which is repetitive and insulting. 353 00:14:01,522 --> 00:14:03,069 As if I would read a word of Huffington Post 354 00:14:03,153 --> 00:14:04,280 after Arianna stepped down. 355 00:14:04,359 --> 00:14:05,773 You may just have to take the I on this one, man. 356 00:14:05,857 --> 00:14:07,774 I mean, you can't really beat them at their own game. 357 00:14:07,858 --> 00:14:09,757 It's like them challenging you to... 358 00:14:10,663 --> 00:14:12,694 Dungeons & Dragons. 359 00:14:13,088 --> 00:14:14,897 Yeah, you can't really challenge someone to D&D. 360 00:14:14,981 --> 00:14:16,438 It's more like a cooperative game that's all about 361 00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:18,149 the shared experience rather than winning. 362 00:14:20,274 --> 00:14:24,034 Thank you, you ol' good friendship having man. 363 00:14:28,275 --> 00:14:29,521 Is everything okay? 364 00:14:29,606 --> 00:14:30,982 Oh, you tell me. 365 00:14:31,067 --> 00:14:33,237 You got a little sleepyhead over there. 366 00:14:34,481 --> 00:14:36,046 Do you want to know what I do 367 00:14:36,131 --> 00:14:38,337 when a kid falls asleep in my class? 368 00:14:38,422 --> 00:14:39,888 - Sure. - Nothing, 369 00:14:39,973 --> 00:14:41,285 'cause it doesn't happen. 370 00:14:41,369 --> 00:14:42,655 I keep my kids engaged. 371 00:14:42,890 --> 00:14:44,179 Anyway, do you have a second 372 00:14:44,264 --> 00:14:46,684 for me to show you something regarding Courtney? 373 00:14:48,686 --> 00:14:50,142 Alright, my little eagles. 374 00:14:50,227 --> 00:14:52,653 We're gonna take quiet time a bit early, okay? 375 00:14:52,738 --> 00:14:54,815 Yes, Ms. Schemmenti. Yes, Ms. Schemmenti. Yes, Ms. Schemmenti. 376 00:14:54,899 --> 00:14:56,655 I know you didn't pull me out of class 377 00:14:56,740 --> 00:14:57,944 just so you could brag. 378 00:14:58,029 --> 00:14:59,699 No, of course not. 379 00:15:02,725 --> 00:15:05,312 Courtney's teaching us a new word. 380 00:15:10,980 --> 00:15:12,530 Courtney! 381 00:15:13,587 --> 00:15:15,213 Look away, y'all. 382 00:15:18,676 --> 00:15:20,339 Alright, guys, we're gonna go into 383 00:15:20,492 --> 00:15:22,105 Ms. Schemmenti's class for a little bit 384 00:15:22,190 --> 00:15:24,128 while Mr. Johnson cleans the board 385 00:15:24,332 --> 00:15:27,301 because Courtney decided to use permanent marker 386 00:15:27,386 --> 00:15:29,309 even though dry‐erase was right there. 387 00:15:29,394 --> 00:15:30,989 But she knew that. 388 00:15:31,074 --> 00:15:32,278 She knew that. 389 00:15:32,363 --> 00:15:33,802 I heard there's a bet going. 390 00:15:33,887 --> 00:15:35,727 Is it too late for me to get in on the action? 391 00:15:40,035 --> 00:15:42,193 I went from having one teacher 392 00:15:42,277 --> 00:15:43,934 to two. Ain't that some **** 393 00:15:44,019 --> 00:15:45,122 Courtney! Courtney! 394 00:15:45,206 --> 00:15:46,962 You know, I'm glad she's in your class now 395 00:15:47,046 --> 00:15:49,558 so you two can throw your little tantrums together. 396 00:15:49,824 --> 00:15:51,902 I'm sorry, was it not a tantrum 397 00:15:52,098 --> 00:15:53,628 when you sent Courtney to my class 398 00:15:53,713 --> 00:15:55,558 without warning me about her behavioral issues? 399 00:15:55,643 --> 00:15:57,269 Yes, I saw your notes in your file. 400 00:15:57,354 --> 00:15:59,230 I did try to warn you, ya gabbadost, 401 00:15:59,315 --> 00:16:00,572 but you got too big for your britches 402 00:16:00,656 --> 00:16:02,074 and you didn't want to listen. 403 00:16:02,159 --> 00:16:04,785 Well, maybe if you hadn't been making fun of me yesterday, 404 00:16:04,870 --> 00:16:06,326 I wouldn't have gotten defensive. 405 00:16:06,411 --> 00:16:08,652 Janine, I was goofing. 406 00:16:08,737 --> 00:16:10,403 Unlike when you called me a bad teacher, 407 00:16:10,488 --> 00:16:12,519 something I would never call you. 408 00:16:12,969 --> 00:16:15,055 You know, I‐I know that review hit you hard, 409 00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:16,730 but I didn't deserve that. 410 00:16:19,648 --> 00:16:21,064 Okay. 411 00:16:21,152 --> 00:16:23,222 I'm sorry. You're right. 412 00:16:23,353 --> 00:16:24,729 You're right. 413 00:16:24,941 --> 00:16:27,357 That review really, really hurt my feelings, 414 00:16:27,441 --> 00:16:28,511 and I took it out on you. 415 00:16:28,596 --> 00:16:30,261 It wasn't even that bad. 416 00:16:30,346 --> 00:16:32,012 It just said you were less experienced. 417 00:16:32,097 --> 00:16:34,223 Listen, if you go look at the Facebook reviews 418 00:16:34,308 --> 00:16:36,208 of my cousin Rocco's hoagie shop, you would think 419 00:16:36,292 --> 00:16:38,199 the man sold food poisoning. 420 00:16:38,284 --> 00:16:40,496 But he's gonna keep making hoagies. 421 00:16:40,673 --> 00:16:41,879 You know why? 422 00:16:41,982 --> 00:16:43,464 Most people love them. 423 00:16:43,658 --> 00:16:45,964 You got to keep making hoagies. 424 00:16:47,288 --> 00:16:49,238 Now, what are we gonna do about this one? 425 00:16:53,105 --> 00:16:55,271 Thank you for your business. 426 00:16:55,449 --> 00:16:56,826 Ol' I should have been a hooper, 427 00:16:56,910 --> 00:16:58,956 but basketball didn't exist lookin' boy. 428 00:17:00,082 --> 00:17:01,394 1800s Slenderman in the face. 429 00:17:01,479 --> 00:17:03,433 Okay, while these are hilarious, 430 00:17:03,518 --> 00:17:06,074 let's try and incorporate some of the lessons into the roast. 431 00:17:06,159 --> 00:17:08,660 Ol' bullet in the head at Ford's Theatre lookin' boy. 432 00:17:08,745 --> 00:17:12,121 My mans got ain't been sleeping four score and seven years ago 433 00:17:12,206 --> 00:17:13,581 bags all up under his eyes. 434 00:17:13,666 --> 00:17:15,386 Abe Lincoln. I'm Abe Lincoln, Mr. Hill. 435 00:17:15,471 --> 00:17:17,425 Yes, yes! Good work, team! 436 00:17:21,621 --> 00:17:23,417 Yeah, I guess, like, thumbs up is 437 00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:24,675 kind of our thing now. 438 00:17:25,543 --> 00:17:27,042 Bye. Don't forget your homework. 439 00:17:27,211 --> 00:17:28,199 - Ms. Schemmenti. - Yes? 440 00:17:28,284 --> 00:17:29,699 Courtney called me stupid. 441 00:17:29,784 --> 00:17:31,820 No, I didn't. I called you "stupendous," 442 00:17:31,905 --> 00:17:33,566 - you idiot. - Courtney! 443 00:17:33,651 --> 00:17:35,737 You know what? I'm just gonna go home and take a nap, 444 00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:37,558 'cause I'm utterly depleted. 445 00:17:37,783 --> 00:17:38,869 What'd she say? 446 00:17:38,961 --> 00:17:40,377 One thing I will say, 447 00:17:40,462 --> 00:17:42,548 that girl has a fairly advanced vocabulary. 448 00:17:42,633 --> 00:17:44,277 She corrected my math last week. 449 00:17:44,362 --> 00:17:45,568 She threw a stapler first, 450 00:17:45,653 --> 00:17:46,910 but she was right about the math. 451 00:17:46,994 --> 00:17:48,531 You know, when I was going through Part 2 452 00:17:48,615 --> 00:17:50,081 of Courtney's file earlier, 453 00:17:50,166 --> 00:17:52,402 I realized her grades have never dropped. 454 00:17:52,487 --> 00:17:53,839 Mnh‐mnh. And usually when a kid 455 00:17:53,924 --> 00:17:55,035 is acting out like that, 456 00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:56,332 you see it in their performance. 457 00:17:56,416 --> 00:17:58,162 Yeah, that's what makes it tough. 458 00:17:58,247 --> 00:18:00,527 Hard to discipline a kid who's getting straight A's. 459 00:18:01,967 --> 00:18:03,593 Alright. 460 00:18:03,678 --> 00:18:05,917 So, what if we rewarded her? 461 00:18:06,596 --> 00:18:08,699 You might be onto something there, rookie. 462 00:18:08,784 --> 00:18:11,910 Okay, so if B makes it block, 463 00:18:11,995 --> 00:18:14,152 then C makes it what? 464 00:18:14,289 --> 00:18:16,835 Uh, not quite. Try again. 465 00:18:16,920 --> 00:18:19,128 There you go. Good job. 466 00:18:19,383 --> 00:18:21,714 Wow. You think you know someone, 467 00:18:21,799 --> 00:18:24,089 and then they cheat on you with their thumb. 468 00:18:26,104 --> 00:18:29,035 Ol' Siskel & Ebert two thumbs up lookin' ass boy. 469 00:18:29,315 --> 00:18:31,160 Okay. 470 00:18:31,367 --> 00:18:33,352 You want to bump the **** Puzzles kid up a grade? 471 00:18:33,436 --> 00:18:35,285 Yes. After talking to Melissa 472 00:18:35,370 --> 00:18:37,467 about how she was able to keep Courtney in line, 473 00:18:37,552 --> 00:18:39,218 we realized the only thing that works 474 00:18:39,303 --> 00:18:40,559 is when she feels challenged. 475 00:18:40,644 --> 00:18:41,700 Are you sure you're not just trying 476 00:18:41,784 --> 00:18:42,997 to dump Courtney on another teacher? 477 00:18:43,081 --> 00:18:44,097 No, no, no. I feel 478 00:18:44,182 --> 00:18:45,808 that with a more challenging workload, 479 00:18:45,893 --> 00:18:48,319 Courtney will be much, much easier to handle, 480 00:18:48,404 --> 00:18:50,387 and she won't have time to distract her classmates. 481 00:18:50,471 --> 00:18:53,519 Mm‐hmm. Why does that sound so familiar? 482 00:18:53,717 --> 00:18:55,557 Oh. Hold up. 483 00:18:57,441 --> 00:18:58,777 Part 3? 484 00:18:58,862 --> 00:19:01,050 My bad, y'all. She was supposed to skip second grade, 485 00:19:01,135 --> 00:19:02,340 but they told me during Essence Fest. 486 00:19:02,424 --> 00:19:03,971 I missed a lot of paperwork during that month. 487 00:19:04,055 --> 00:19:05,511 Isn't Essence Fest just a weekend? 488 00:19:05,596 --> 00:19:06,558 Maybe for y'all. 489 00:19:08,980 --> 00:19:11,558 - Oh, hey, Barbara! - Nothing to see here, 490 00:19:11,643 --> 00:19:14,889 just Janine going on and on about what a handful Courtney is 491 00:19:14,974 --> 00:19:17,605 and how she can't handle the situation at all. 492 00:19:17,697 --> 00:19:19,300 Is that so? 493 00:19:20,011 --> 00:19:21,797 Fine. 494 00:19:21,882 --> 00:19:24,042 I guess technically Janine succeeded. 495 00:19:24,191 --> 00:19:26,241 She figured out that Courtney needs to be bumped up a grade. 496 00:19:26,325 --> 00:19:28,411 Guess you win the bet. 497 00:19:28,503 --> 00:19:29,756 Hmm. 498 00:19:30,831 --> 00:19:32,162 Barbara? 499 00:19:32,980 --> 00:19:34,356 You believed in me? 500 00:19:34,441 --> 00:19:36,737 Janine, why don't you go handle this transfer 501 00:19:36,822 --> 00:19:39,198 so that your class isn't any more disrupted 502 00:19:39,283 --> 00:19:41,014 than it already has been? 503 00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:43,381 Okay. 504 00:19:44,834 --> 00:19:46,490 Mm. 505 00:19:48,131 --> 00:19:49,597 It's a heart. 506 00:19:49,681 --> 00:19:51,562 I learned that from Courtney. 507 00:19:52,472 --> 00:19:55,398 I thought Barbara bet against me, but she didn't. 508 00:19:55,521 --> 00:19:57,767 She actually thinks I'm a great teacher. 509 00:19:57,851 --> 00:20:00,444 Maybe even better than... 510 00:20:00,529 --> 00:20:01,945 Courtney! 511 00:20:02,134 --> 00:20:03,856 Hey, Courtney! What, get... 512 00:20:03,941 --> 00:20:06,944 How'd you get back in the building? Courtney! 513 00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:14,897 It's barely wet. What you, the CDC? 514 00:20:15,011 --> 00:20:19,387 I will expect some non‐brassiere money from you by tomorrow, 515 00:20:19,472 --> 00:20:21,058 because, Ava? 516 00:20:21,143 --> 00:20:22,309 Huh? 517 00:20:22,394 --> 00:20:25,604 You do not want to owe me money. 518 00:20:26,791 --> 00:20:28,092 Hmm. 519 00:20:32,728 --> 00:20:35,434 Oh, damn. 520 00:20:35,519 --> 00:20:37,439 Mm. 521 00:20:40,734 --> 00:20:42,254 What?