1 00:00:01,376 --> 00:00:04,963 [ "Amazing Grace" plays ] 2 00:00:04,963 --> 00:00:09,301 ♪♪ 3 00:00:09,301 --> 00:00:12,137 Ms. Teagues, are you chewing gum? 4 00:00:13,472 --> 00:00:14,932 Yeah. 5 00:00:14,932 --> 00:00:17,643 Where does gum go when you enter this classroom? 6 00:00:17,643 --> 00:00:21,063 Children: Wanda the Waste Basket! 7 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:25,025 Okay. All right, come on, 8 00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:26,777 my future little Odd Futures. 9 00:00:26,777 --> 00:00:28,237 Time to go back to our classroom. 10 00:00:28,237 --> 00:00:29,363 ♪♪ 11 00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:30,781 Uh, come on, guys. 12 00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:32,824 You'll see Ms. Davis next week. 13 00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:35,536 [ Sighs ] Hey, guys. 14 00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:37,120 I know music class is fun, 15 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:39,039 but that's why we have to let someone else have a turn. 16 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,832 ♪♪ 17 00:00:40,832 --> 00:00:42,000 All right, guys, you know what? 18 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,335 Don't make me collect the recorders, 19 00:00:43,335 --> 00:00:44,753 'cause if I collect them, 20 00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:46,463 who knows when you're gonna see them again. 21 00:00:46,463 --> 00:00:47,756 [ Music stops ] 22 00:00:47,756 --> 00:00:54,179 ♪ That saved a wretch like me ♪ 23 00:00:54,179 --> 00:00:55,681 ♪ I once was lost ♪ 24 00:00:55,681 --> 00:00:58,684 [ Maker's "Hold'em" playing ] 25 00:00:58,684 --> 00:01:06,358 ♪♪ 26 00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:10,571 [ Sighs ] So sorry I'm late. 27 00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:12,030 Oh, glad you guys started without me. 28 00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:13,031 We weren't waiting. 29 00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:14,283 This isn't a restaurant. 30 00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:16,368 Uh, why are you late? Is everything okay? 31 00:01:16,368 --> 00:01:17,703 Yeah, everything's fine. 32 00:01:17,703 --> 00:01:19,246 The kids just love Ms. Davis' class, 33 00:01:19,246 --> 00:01:20,914 so it takes a while to get them back, 34 00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:22,583 and then everything runs a little late. 35 00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:24,543 You know, normally, I'd be bothered by my kids 36 00:01:24,543 --> 00:01:26,837 being obsessed with another teacher, but I get it. 37 00:01:26,837 --> 00:01:29,214 My class? Also Davis devotees. Mm. 38 00:01:29,214 --> 00:01:32,843 Only way she could be cooler is if she were related to Angela. 39 00:01:32,843 --> 00:01:34,886 Not that I think all black people are related. 40 00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:36,305 Well, maybe you do. 41 00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:38,056 Maybe that was your subconscious speaking. 42 00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:39,808 What would Angela Davis think? 43 00:01:39,808 --> 00:01:42,144 Well, my suggestion to all of you 44 00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:45,105 is to enjoy your free periods while you can. 45 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:48,108 Because music class will be going bye-bye-bye 46 00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:50,402 like Blackstreet Boyz II Men. 47 00:01:50,402 --> 00:01:52,779 Mm, mnh, no. Wrong in like three ways. 48 00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:54,197 Whoa. What's happening to music class? 49 00:01:54,197 --> 00:01:56,742 Well, the school pays for the music class 50 00:01:56,742 --> 00:01:58,410 out of discretionary funds. 51 00:01:58,410 --> 00:02:01,204 And since Ava lost her dirt on Superintendent Collins 52 00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:03,123 when he married the goomah, 53 00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:04,916 there's no way he's gonna fork over the cash 54 00:02:04,916 --> 00:02:06,668 like he has for the last three years. 55 00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:09,838 No more of the glitz and glam you lot have become used to. 56 00:02:09,838 --> 00:02:11,757 It's gonna go right back to the lean years. 57 00:02:11,757 --> 00:02:13,508 [ Handle cracks ] Mm-hmm. 58 00:02:13,508 --> 00:02:15,177 Then what are these? 59 00:02:15,177 --> 00:02:17,262 There has to be a way to convince Superintendent Collins 60 00:02:17,262 --> 00:02:19,264 that we still need that discretionary money. 61 00:02:19,264 --> 00:02:21,767 Well, all the principals have to present their cases for funding 62 00:02:21,767 --> 00:02:23,685 to the school board at the end of the week. 63 00:02:23,685 --> 00:02:25,187 How do you always know this stuff? 64 00:02:25,187 --> 00:02:26,313 I told you all this many times -- 65 00:02:26,313 --> 00:02:27,648 I trained to be a principal. 66 00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:29,691 Mm, it's not ringing a bell. Mm. 67 00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:32,402 I interned at the Baltimore School Board for two summers. 68 00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,488 I got my Master's in Educational Leadership, 69 00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:36,657 and I went through a program specifically meant 70 00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:38,992 to encourage young black men to become principals. 71 00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:40,661 So do I think that Ava can learn 72 00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:42,996 everything that she needs to know by Friday? 73 00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,665 No. 74 00:02:44,665 --> 00:02:46,667 Out of curiosity, what was her presentation like last year? 75 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:48,960 She played a chopped and screwed version of Tom Cruise saying, 76 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:50,462 "Show me the money," on repeat. 77 00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:52,214 And no one asked any questions when that worked? 78 00:02:52,214 --> 00:02:53,548 I'm sure she is preparing, 79 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:55,425 given the circumstances have changed. 80 00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:58,136 "They keep telling me I've aged out of 'The Bachelor,' 81 00:02:58,136 --> 00:03:00,889 so that's why I need to borrow your birth certificate, Ava, 82 00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:03,308 exclamation mark. [ Cellphone beeps ] 83 00:03:05,394 --> 00:03:07,813 Even in a world where Ava could put together 84 00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:09,731 a competent presentation... Mm-hmm. 85 00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:11,358 ...it still does not change the fact 86 00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:14,528 that the Superintendent can't stand her 87 00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:16,697 and, by extension, us. 88 00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:18,323 The nerve on that guy. 89 00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:19,991 Yeah, well, maybe this will be the year 90 00:03:19,991 --> 00:03:22,828 where the school board finally awards me 91 00:03:22,828 --> 00:03:25,914 that Advancement Grant that I have been applying to 92 00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:27,707 for 10 years. 93 00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,169 They will if we make them. 94 00:03:32,295 --> 00:03:35,173 Just like a little... gentle arm-twisting. 95 00:03:36,842 --> 00:03:38,718 A little arm twist never hurt. 96 00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:40,929 [ Gasps ] This is so exciting. Oh, my God. 97 00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:42,347 I'm gonna go to the mall right after school 98 00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:43,890 and get a new shakedown sweater. 99 00:03:47,853 --> 00:03:49,146 Do I even wanna know? 100 00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:50,772 I don't know. Do you? 101 00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,232 You know you have a presentation 102 00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:53,733 to the school board coming up, right? 103 00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:55,402 Yeah, I do it annually. 104 00:03:55,402 --> 00:03:58,196 Right, but you're ready for the one this year? 105 00:03:58,196 --> 00:04:00,365 This girl doesn't know what "annually" means. 106 00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:01,450 No, I know what it means. 107 00:04:01,450 --> 00:04:03,285 It's just that this time is a little different. 108 00:04:03,285 --> 00:04:05,203 Yeah, my job is on the line. 109 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:08,707 More importantly, discretionary funds for the entire school. 110 00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:10,500 Yeah, but those two things kinda go hand in hand 111 00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:11,960 if you really think about it. Great. 112 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,004 So you're taking it seriously, then. As a heart attack. 113 00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:16,715 I haven't watched "Love After Lockup" in like a month. 114 00:04:16,715 --> 00:04:17,883 Free Puppy. 115 00:04:17,883 --> 00:04:19,593 Can I see the presentation? 116 00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:20,927 You don't have a lawyer, do you? 117 00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,096 No. Oh, not unless you count that guy 118 00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:24,598 that represented me in that hit and run. 119 00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:26,892 I was clipped by a delirious jogger. 120 00:04:26,892 --> 00:04:28,602 Then I'll show you the presentation tomorrow. 121 00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:30,562 There's a lot of proprietary technology involved. 122 00:04:30,562 --> 00:04:32,814 Sign this NDA 123 00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:34,149 and bring it back in the morning. 124 00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:37,444 Don't look at them. They've already signed. 125 00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:39,905 Oh. Okay. 126 00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:41,907 I found a connection at the school board. 127 00:04:41,907 --> 00:04:43,158 Ooh, you got a guy there? 128 00:04:43,158 --> 00:04:44,201 No, you do. 129 00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:46,620 Delisha Sloss. She goes to your church. 130 00:04:46,620 --> 00:04:49,289 My guy says she's on the finance committee or something. 131 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:50,499 I know her. 132 00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:52,626 One of our shadier members. Mm-hmm. 133 00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:55,754 But God's light finds even the shadows. 134 00:04:55,754 --> 00:04:57,756 Yeah, she's up to something. 135 00:04:57,756 --> 00:05:00,091 Being able to spot opps runs in the family. 136 00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:03,720 That's how we Schemmentis got so successful in...business. 137 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:06,056 I don't think so. 138 00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:08,475 Oh, come on! It's an easy squeeze. 139 00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:11,102 She's been skimming cash off the top for years. 140 00:05:11,102 --> 00:05:13,313 It's not that I can't handle it. 141 00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:15,065 It's just that... 142 00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:17,275 I'm not used to playing in the mud. 143 00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:19,236 I leave that to people like you. 144 00:05:23,782 --> 00:05:25,826 People like me, huh? 145 00:05:27,619 --> 00:05:29,871 Your signed NDA. 146 00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:31,373 That's a cute shirt. Oh, thank you. 147 00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:32,833 I got it from Old Navy. 148 00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:33,959 It would look much better on me. 149 00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:34,960 You know what? Give it to me. 150 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,253 No. What? 151 00:05:36,253 --> 00:05:37,671 Look, can we just start already? 152 00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:39,673 I wanna finish this before the kids get here at 7:30 -- 153 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:40,966 6 -- 7:30. 154 00:05:40,966 --> 00:05:43,468 This presentation is about to blow your mind. 155 00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:46,263 Let's get started. Ava 2, Ava 3. 156 00:05:46,263 --> 00:05:48,640 [ Motors whirring ] 157 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:50,267 Oh! What?! 158 00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:53,562 [ Motors whirring ] 159 00:05:53,562 --> 00:05:54,896 What the hell? 160 00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:58,650 Success. Greatness. 161 00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:00,026 Passion. 162 00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:01,862 And what do all those words have in common? 163 00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,613 Ava Coleman. Ava Coleman. 164 00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:06,283 So, in conclusion, a school with such an amazing leader 165 00:06:06,283 --> 00:06:08,702 is an obvious choice for discretionary funds. 166 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,120 And what school is that? 167 00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:13,081 A. 168 00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:14,457 B. B. 169 00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:15,792 Okay. O. 170 00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:17,168 That's enough. T. 171 00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:18,336 L. Janine, you're throwing off my timing. 172 00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:19,421 E. Enough. 173 00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:22,173 M -- M -- M -- M -- M -- M -- 174 00:06:22,173 --> 00:06:24,217 What? You couldn't let me finish? 175 00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:26,136 No -- [ Thud ] 176 00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:27,470 Ow! 177 00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:29,139 So, what do you think? 178 00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:31,349 I think... 179 00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:34,603 I don't think this is what the school board is looking for. 180 00:06:34,603 --> 00:06:37,188 [ Sighs ] Dammit! 181 00:06:37,188 --> 00:06:39,065 I knew it. 182 00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:40,442 [ Sighs ] I thought I could just hit 'em 183 00:06:40,442 --> 00:06:42,193 with the ol' razzle dazzle. 184 00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:44,321 These are the parts about being a principal that I'm not good at. 185 00:06:44,321 --> 00:06:47,198 Interesting. What parts would you say you are good at? 186 00:06:47,198 --> 00:06:49,034 This isn't the time for jokes, Janine. 187 00:06:49,034 --> 00:06:51,202 This is the first time in my life that I won't be able to 188 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:53,788 charisma my way out of the situation. 189 00:06:53,788 --> 00:06:56,541 This is the first job that I've liked in my life. 190 00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:58,335 I don't wanna lose it. 191 00:06:59,878 --> 00:07:03,548 Okay. Well, what if we find a way to combine your charisma 192 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:05,759 with what the school board is actually looking for? 193 00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,510 That's the point -- I don't know. 194 00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:08,928 I'm not some nerd, 195 00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:10,847 got somebody showing me the ropes and giving me advice 196 00:07:10,847 --> 00:07:13,391 and putting up with my near-constant hijinks. 197 00:07:13,391 --> 00:07:15,185 Okay. You're right. 198 00:07:15,185 --> 00:07:17,103 We need to find someone who knows 199 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:19,105 what presentations like this should look like. 200 00:07:20,732 --> 00:07:22,067 I know how you feel about Ava 201 00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:23,860 and the whole principal situation, 202 00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:25,487 but this is for the kids. 203 00:07:25,487 --> 00:07:26,905 It feels like it's for Ava. 204 00:07:26,905 --> 00:07:29,991 Yeah. But it'd be for all of us, too. 205 00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:32,494 I mean, say they fire Ava. Then what? 206 00:07:32,494 --> 00:07:34,746 They bring in some micromanaging control freak 207 00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:36,039 who won't let us do our jobs? 208 00:07:36,039 --> 00:07:37,624 Yeah, we wouldn't want that. 209 00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:40,043 Look, I know she may not be our best option, 210 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:43,213 but she certainly isn't the worst. 211 00:07:43,213 --> 00:07:46,966 Fine. But if she refers to me as a food item, I'm out. 212 00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:49,344 Great. Meet me in the library at lunch. 213 00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:50,845 [ P. A. beeps ] Ava: Did he say yes? 214 00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:52,430 'Cause otherwise, I found a livestream 215 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:55,100 of some other school board's presentation that might help. 216 00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:57,686 Never mind. It's an "SNL" skit. 217 00:07:57,686 --> 00:07:59,938 Since I've been here, Ava's biggest improvements 218 00:07:59,938 --> 00:08:02,148 to the school include renaming the Wi-Fi network 219 00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,817 "Bad Bitches Only" 220 00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:06,695 and using field-trip money to put 26-inch rims 221 00:08:06,695 --> 00:08:08,071 on one of the buses. 222 00:08:08,071 --> 00:08:10,365 Is it how I'd do the job? No. 223 00:08:10,365 --> 00:08:13,660 But the school does deserve to have this money. 224 00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:15,161 Very good. 225 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:16,663 Oh, I like that. 226 00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:18,039 Melissa: Repo's here. 227 00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:20,083 Hey, Melissa. 228 00:08:20,083 --> 00:08:21,376 You need something? 229 00:08:21,376 --> 00:08:22,794 Yeah, I'm just here to repo this rug 230 00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:25,255 since you got it from a mud person. 231 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:26,965 Wait. 232 00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:30,051 Is this because I won't extort a church member? 233 00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:31,678 You are overreacting. 234 00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,555 No, I'm just trying to protect you. 235 00:08:33,555 --> 00:08:37,559 I wouldn't want you involved in any of my immoral activities. 236 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:38,852 You need some help? 237 00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:40,019 Nah, I got it. 238 00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:41,396 Okay. So, she should start by showing them 239 00:08:41,396 --> 00:08:42,731 our student retention rates. 240 00:08:42,731 --> 00:08:43,982 They've been steady since the appeal 241 00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:45,233 for a student recount was filed. 242 00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:47,110 Yes, Ava counted twins as one student 243 00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:49,446 because she said they share the same soul. 244 00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:52,032 That's true. And this is so boring! 245 00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:53,241 And I don't like this shift 246 00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:54,909 in the power dynamic where you're in charge. 247 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:56,036 You've never been less attractive. 248 00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:57,203 Look, we have to build a case 249 00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:59,456 to get the discretionary funding with data and facts. 250 00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:00,915 Well, then this is pointless. 251 00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:02,709 I've spent my whole life avoiding those two things. 252 00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:05,545 Look, what if we just write down exactly what she needs to say, 253 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,005 and then she can just read it? 254 00:09:07,005 --> 00:09:08,381 I wish I could just read something, 255 00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,008 but this superintendent is out to get me. 256 00:09:10,008 --> 00:09:12,510 He's gonna be throwing curves like that lady gym. 257 00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:15,555 Okay. Then we have to keep trying. 258 00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:17,015 This is our only option. 259 00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:18,558 Unless you want to catch Superintendent Collins 260 00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:19,893 cheating again. 261 00:09:19,893 --> 00:09:22,395 Yes! Let's focus on that. 262 00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,397 That's got to be easier. 263 00:09:24,397 --> 00:09:26,149 Maybe the best thing for the school in the long run 264 00:09:26,149 --> 00:09:28,735 is for her to fail and they get a new principal. 265 00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,946 Not necessarily me. Just a new one. 266 00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:35,533 Who...is like me. 267 00:09:35,533 --> 00:09:38,203 And that is one of the many ways that "My Octopus Teacher" 268 00:09:38,203 --> 00:09:40,705 made me, well, believe in love again. 269 00:09:42,624 --> 00:09:44,501 Is everything okay? 270 00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,169 The only time I saw you two sit apart 271 00:09:46,169 --> 00:09:48,129 is when Melissa said you should put sugar on grits. 272 00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:49,422 There's nothing to talk about. 273 00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,174 Yeah, 'cause it's very straightforward. 274 00:09:51,174 --> 00:09:53,927 We're under attack, and she's got her head buried in the sand. 275 00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:55,720 Better the sand than the mud. 276 00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:57,931 Okay. You refusing to cooperate 277 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,849 doesn't stop bad things from happening. 278 00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:02,060 We should be using people doing bad stuff 279 00:10:02,060 --> 00:10:03,853 to do good stuff for our kids. 280 00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:06,689 Mm. "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil 281 00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:08,733 is for good men to do nothing." 282 00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,944 You know, usually when you quote stuff, it's annoying 283 00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:13,571 and I want you to shut up, but in this case, very relevant. 284 00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:14,864 Oh, thank you. I have another. 285 00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:16,616 No, you don't. No, I don't. 286 00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:22,664 What are y'all doing here? 287 00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:24,624 You didn't think we would give up that easy, did you? 288 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:25,959 That's exactly what I thought. 289 00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:27,377 I'm genuinely surprised to see you. 290 00:10:27,377 --> 00:10:29,045 Okay. So, you know how your presentation 291 00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:30,505 used those robotablets? 292 00:10:30,505 --> 00:10:31,798 My assistants, yes. 293 00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:34,008 Well, what if we were your assistants? 294 00:10:34,008 --> 00:10:36,136 That way, we can handle all the data and graphs, 295 00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:38,429 and you can handle the showmanship. 296 00:10:38,429 --> 00:10:39,556 I love it! 297 00:10:39,556 --> 00:10:41,307 This is like a group project at school 298 00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:43,309 where I bring the energy, and you guys bring 299 00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,436 whatever doesn't require a personality. 300 00:10:45,436 --> 00:10:47,981 This is a good idea. 301 00:10:57,615 --> 00:10:59,367 Okay. I know you said that you're okay, 302 00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,202 but I can tell that you're not by the way that you're gardening. 303 00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:03,079 I don't know what you're talking about. 304 00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:04,956 Ooh! 305 00:11:04,956 --> 00:11:07,125 Oh, J-J-Jacob, I'm sorry. 306 00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:08,585 I'm -- I'm -- I'm fine, really. 307 00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:10,670 Oh, I'm sorry. No, I'm good. 308 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:12,547 Oh. 309 00:11:14,966 --> 00:11:17,510 I know we need the money. 310 00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:20,471 And I have applied for that Advancement Grant 311 00:11:20,471 --> 00:11:23,099 for 10 years now. 312 00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:25,643 I just don't want to compromise my morals to get it. 313 00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:30,190 Look, while I admire that you've applied 10 years in a row, 314 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:31,691 have you heard that saying 315 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:34,068 about the definition of insanity? 316 00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:35,778 Have you ever heard the saying 317 00:11:35,778 --> 00:11:37,655 that I will pop you upside your head 318 00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:39,490 if you imply that I am insane? 319 00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:40,825 I'm just saying... [ Grumbles ] 320 00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:42,327 ...you did something you wouldn't normally do 321 00:11:42,327 --> 00:11:43,953 by starting this garden with me. 322 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,538 That didn't turn out so bad, huh? 323 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,173 Hey. Thought I was early. 324 00:11:55,173 --> 00:11:56,799 You are. I'm just earlier. 325 00:11:56,799 --> 00:11:57,884 Ava here yet? 326 00:11:57,884 --> 00:11:59,677 She's probably somewhere doing power poses. 327 00:11:59,677 --> 00:12:01,137 Actually, it's been a minute. 328 00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:02,597 Let me check and make sure she hasn't bolted. 329 00:12:02,597 --> 00:12:04,182 Mm-hmm. 330 00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:12,815 Gregory Eddie, right? 331 00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:13,858 Yeah. 332 00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:15,318 It's good to see you again. 333 00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:18,780 You know, I'm sorry I couldn't hire you as principal, but... 334 00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:20,031 my hands were tied. 335 00:12:20,031 --> 00:12:21,741 To the bed? Pardon? 336 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:22,992 Nothing. 337 00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:26,246 Look, if you're still interested in being principal, 338 00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:28,998 I think maybe some positions might be opening up, 339 00:12:28,998 --> 00:12:30,375 even at Abbott. 340 00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:31,834 So... 341 00:12:31,834 --> 00:12:34,796 if you're interested... 342 00:12:34,796 --> 00:12:36,631 e-mail me. 343 00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:43,638 Hey. Hey. 344 00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:47,100 Look, there's Delisha Sloss -- if anybody cares. 345 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,227 Excuse me. 346 00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:57,110 Okay. So, after Gregory talks math competency, 347 00:12:57,110 --> 00:12:58,611 I'll handle the attendance graph, 348 00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:00,280 and then I'll kick it to you for testing numbers. 349 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,448 So I'm the grand finale. But what if they want an encore? 350 00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:04,367 That's okay. We'll handle all surprises, 351 00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:06,119 and all you have to do is take care of the lobs. 352 00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:08,746 Oh, perfect! I'll go into a power pose. 353 00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:10,873 And remember, you don't wanna show too much improvement 354 00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:12,292 because then they think we won't need the money, 355 00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,543 but then, also, you don't want to show 356 00:13:13,543 --> 00:13:14,836 that we haven't gotten any better 357 00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:16,713 because then they think we're not capable of improvement. 358 00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,673 Wow. And this is the job you really want? 359 00:13:18,673 --> 00:13:20,383 Sounds gross. Yeah. 360 00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:22,260 Ah, Principal Coleman. 361 00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:24,095 Superintendent Collins. 362 00:13:24,095 --> 00:13:26,639 I'm really looking forward to showing you our presentation. 363 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,141 W-What do you mean "our"? 364 00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,934 I've enlisted two of Abbott's best teachers 365 00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:31,352 to help me with the presentation -- 366 00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:33,187 our shortest and our finest. 367 00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:35,815 [ Chuckles ] No, you're not slick. 368 00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,151 You'll be giving today's presentation alone. 369 00:13:39,277 --> 00:13:41,320 [ Whispers indistinctly ] 370 00:13:42,488 --> 00:13:44,741 Uh, oh, my God. What did he just say to you? 371 00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:46,659 That if you don't do well, you're gonna get fired? 372 00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:48,161 Worse. 373 00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:49,912 He mumbled and I didn't hear it. 374 00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:53,666 [ Toilet flushes ] 375 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:54,959 [ Door unlocks ] 376 00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:03,051 Oh. Mrs. Sloss. 377 00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:05,053 I'm a teacher at Abbott Elementary. 378 00:14:05,053 --> 00:14:06,971 I believe we go to the same church. 379 00:14:06,971 --> 00:14:08,347 Oh, how lovely. 380 00:14:08,347 --> 00:14:10,058 I think I've seen you around. 381 00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:12,977 Of course you've seen Deacon Wiley's new hairstyle. 382 00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:16,272 Oh, he's got it dyed, fried, and laid to the side. 383 00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:19,275 [ Chuckles ] Yes, it's funny when people look bad. 384 00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:21,903 Um, uh... 385 00:14:21,903 --> 00:14:24,781 Sister Sloss, God is good, is he not? 386 00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:27,033 He is. And he knows in our hearts 387 00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:29,577 whether we are good people or not. 388 00:14:29,577 --> 00:14:31,996 I imagine he does. You have a good day now. 389 00:14:31,996 --> 00:14:33,956 Well, while I have your attention, 390 00:14:33,956 --> 00:14:37,335 you are on the Church Finance Committee, aren't you? 391 00:14:42,173 --> 00:14:44,592 Ava: Our test scores have been good. 392 00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:47,678 But not too good. 393 00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:49,847 And definitely not bad. 394 00:14:49,847 --> 00:14:54,018 Uh, the same goes for our attendance rates. 395 00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:57,313 They have been exactly where they should be 396 00:14:57,313 --> 00:15:01,150 to inspire confidence while also leaving room for improvement. 397 00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:03,361 Any questions? 398 00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:04,904 Never mind. There's no time for questions. 399 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,532 I still have, uh, 13 more slides. 400 00:15:10,409 --> 00:15:12,662 I can't really hear anything. 401 00:15:12,662 --> 00:15:14,330 Okay, get away from the door. Let me try. 402 00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:19,210 Yeah, I can't hear anything, either. 403 00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:20,795 Who's got the biggest ears? 404 00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:25,299 I -- I'ma just... 405 00:15:25,299 --> 00:15:26,717 I'll get a glass. 406 00:15:31,055 --> 00:15:33,766 When I'm overwhelmed, I get on my phone, too. 407 00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:35,059 I like to read the news. 408 00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:36,519 You know, seeing something way worse 409 00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:39,564 than what's happening to me really puts things in perspective. 410 00:15:39,564 --> 00:15:42,108 Yeah, I was just sending an e-mail, but... 411 00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:43,693 I can do that later. 412 00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:46,487 By the way, thank you so much for helping. 413 00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:48,030 I know it isn't easy to coach someone 414 00:15:48,030 --> 00:15:49,991 who has the job you should've gotten. 415 00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:52,326 Yeah, well, it's a lot easier to say yes to things 416 00:15:52,326 --> 00:15:54,328 when you're the one asking. 417 00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:56,330 Oh. Well, in that case, 418 00:15:56,330 --> 00:15:58,291 can I get a burger and a Nintendo Switch? 419 00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,418 [ Both laugh ] 420 00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:02,170 [ Sighs ] 421 00:16:02,170 --> 00:16:03,504 How do you think it's going in there? 422 00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:06,048 Oh, I think it's probably going well. 423 00:16:07,341 --> 00:16:09,135 I think it's going w-- 424 00:16:09,135 --> 00:16:12,054 I think it's probably going well. 425 00:16:12,054 --> 00:16:14,223 And that brings me to my last chart... 426 00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:18,311 What are we looking at here? 427 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:22,815 Well, there's no words on it, but...it's going up! 428 00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:24,483 That can't be too bad. 429 00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:26,319 Or too good! 430 00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:28,863 Based on what you've shown us so far, 431 00:16:28,863 --> 00:16:31,866 what metrics are your funding targets keyed to? 432 00:16:31,866 --> 00:16:34,327 Thank God you brought that up. 433 00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:37,580 I was like, "I hope he asks about Target and whatnot," 434 00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:39,332 'cause I have another slide -- You know what? 435 00:16:39,332 --> 00:16:41,834 I thi-- I think we've seen all we need to see here today. 436 00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,294 Thanks for coming in. 437 00:16:43,294 --> 00:16:45,880 But I -- I -- Look, that's your time, 438 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,965 not even including the five minutes you took 439 00:16:47,965 --> 00:16:49,550 when you got a paper cut. 440 00:16:51,302 --> 00:16:53,804 Look, I know you all want me to talk 441 00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:56,349 about pie charts and cake graphs, 442 00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:58,684 but that's not the entire story. 443 00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:01,354 Yeah, discretionary funds can be used to nurture students 444 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:03,773 artistically so they can grow up and do that graffiti 445 00:17:03,773 --> 00:17:05,524 that bougie people don't get mad at. 446 00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:07,109 You mean a mural? 447 00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:08,444 That's it. 448 00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:10,821 But what you don't see is how I make sure 449 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:14,033 that forgetful students get supplies. 450 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:16,953 Or how I help students with broke parents 451 00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:20,414 get uniforms that fit so they don't get roasted all day. 452 00:17:20,414 --> 00:17:23,251 Or how I have barrels of lotion stashed all around the school 453 00:17:23,251 --> 00:17:25,836 so these kids don't start a commotion with they crusty ankles. 454 00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:29,757 My unique approach to these funds betters the school. 455 00:17:29,757 --> 00:17:32,969 Yes, we all understand the importance of moisturization, 456 00:17:32,969 --> 00:17:34,554 but your time is up. 457 00:17:35,846 --> 00:17:37,557 [ Gasps ] Ava: No. 458 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:38,766 Y'all not about to rush me out of here 459 00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:40,476 like I'm Lil Mama at the VMAs. 460 00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:41,894 Psst! Hey. It's open. 461 00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:43,479 Because you know what? 462 00:17:43,479 --> 00:17:46,232 No matter what happens to me, Abbott will be fine. 463 00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:47,817 Because the teachers that work there 464 00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:49,902 are some of the most dedicated, hardworking, 465 00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:52,405 and creative teachers in this entire city. 466 00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:54,198 You tell 'em, Ava! 467 00:17:54,198 --> 00:17:55,575 [ Door slams ] 468 00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:57,493 And it's not like y'all been making it rain up in here. 469 00:17:57,493 --> 00:17:59,078 We've been taking appetizer money 470 00:17:59,078 --> 00:18:02,081 and giving these kids a charcuterie experience. 471 00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:04,250 Don't give us the money because we need it. 472 00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,836 Give it to us because everyone at Abbott deserves it. 473 00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:11,632 Well, thank you, Principal Coleman. 474 00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:16,762 Uh, that was a very... passionate plea. 475 00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:19,390 [ Door opens ] 476 00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:23,561 Well? 477 00:18:23,561 --> 00:18:24,812 Okay, sis! 478 00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:26,397 I did that! And that's on what? 479 00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:28,232 Periodt! [ Laughter ] 480 00:18:28,232 --> 00:18:29,609 Okay. What's happening? 481 00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:31,777 I mean, [clears throat] good job, Ava. 482 00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:33,863 Thank you, subordinate. 483 00:18:33,863 --> 00:18:36,324 So, our girl really did a good job, huh? 484 00:18:36,324 --> 00:18:37,742 Surprisingly, yes. 485 00:18:37,742 --> 00:18:39,160 Ooh! So we get the funding we need? 486 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:41,162 No, of course not. 487 00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:43,623 As long as Ava's at Abbott and I'm the superintendent, 488 00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:44,874 you never will. 489 00:18:44,874 --> 00:18:46,667 She blackmailed me. 490 00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:48,753 It's kind of hard to get over being blackmailed. 491 00:18:48,753 --> 00:18:50,713 You know, he's not wrong. 492 00:18:50,713 --> 00:18:53,215 I haven't spoken to my blackmailer in two years. 493 00:18:53,215 --> 00:18:55,968 Do I miss my sister? Yeah, every day. 494 00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:58,971 Look, if it wasn't your school suffering, it'd just be another. 495 00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:02,016 Don't be mad at me, be mad at the system. 496 00:19:03,267 --> 00:19:07,396 I am mad. I'm really mad. 497 00:19:08,439 --> 00:19:11,359 I'm glad I caught you before you left. 498 00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:14,362 I talked to my office, and I have good news. 499 00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:15,863 Oh, really? Mm. 500 00:19:15,863 --> 00:19:17,114 Regarding? 501 00:19:17,114 --> 00:19:19,367 Regarding the fact that Abbott will be a recipient 502 00:19:19,367 --> 00:19:21,369 of the Advancement Grant this year. 503 00:19:21,369 --> 00:19:23,954 [ Gasps ] What a surprise. 504 00:19:23,954 --> 00:19:27,375 After 10 years of impeccable applications, 505 00:19:27,375 --> 00:19:30,086 we suddenly find ourselves worthy. 506 00:19:30,086 --> 00:19:31,295 How wonderful. 507 00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:33,756 Yes, it is...wonderful. 508 00:19:33,756 --> 00:19:37,802 Ah. See you in church on Sunday. 509 00:19:37,802 --> 00:19:40,054 And every Sunday after that. 510 00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:43,015 Hmm. 511 00:19:44,642 --> 00:19:46,811 Barbara, this is great! 512 00:19:46,811 --> 00:19:48,270 Jacob: What are we gonna use the grant for? 513 00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:49,522 I mean, which programs go? Which ones stay? 514 00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:50,731 This could get very stressful. 515 00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:52,775 Okay, you need to stop thinking about this 516 00:19:52,775 --> 00:19:54,318 because you're gonna break out in hives. 517 00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:57,780 Because this is a decision for our principal. 518 00:20:00,533 --> 00:20:02,118 Stop looking at me like that. 519 00:20:02,118 --> 00:20:03,994 If anybody hugs me, I'm turning down the grant. 520 00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,668 Did you... 521 00:20:10,668 --> 00:20:13,212 Did you shake someone down for me? 522 00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:17,675 I shook someone down for us, ya big gabootz. 523 00:20:17,675 --> 00:20:20,553 Guboonza? Garbanzo. 524 00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,889 Yeah, that's a bean, but thank you for trying. 525 00:20:23,889 --> 00:20:26,225 [ Laughs ] 526 00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:27,893 Barbara: Sometimes you try something new 527 00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:29,687 for the people you care about. 528 00:20:29,687 --> 00:20:32,648 The Lord helps those who help themselves. 529 00:20:32,648 --> 00:20:35,943 And he punishes those who have been helping themselves 530 00:20:35,943 --> 00:20:39,363 to the church's petty cash. 531 00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:40,781 Mnh-mnh-mnh. 532 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:44,744 I saw your little e-mail. 533 00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:46,287 I know. That's why I'm sitting here. 534 00:20:46,287 --> 00:20:47,913 Are you sure you wanna do this? 535 00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:50,040 This job requires you to be cool and level-headed, 536 00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:53,085 and you ain't exactly known for keeping your composure. 537 00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:55,713 I'm sure. 538 00:20:55,713 --> 00:20:57,423 This job means more responsibility. 539 00:20:57,423 --> 00:21:00,134 Commitment. Emotional availability. 540 00:21:00,134 --> 00:21:01,594 I understand. 541 00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:04,096 Well, welcome to teaching full-time at Abbott, Mr. Eddie. 542 00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:06,432 Thank you. 543 00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:11,604 What I'm looking forward to the most 544 00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:13,981 is having access to the H. R. department. 545 00:21:20,654 --> 00:21:22,323 What's H. R.?