1
00:00:01,921 --> 00:00:03,549
Ooh, pretty.
Oh, thanks.
2
00:00:03,549 --> 00:00:05,344
One of my students gave me
this for some reason and --
3
00:00:05,344 --> 00:00:07,181
Hey,
that's a nice sweater.
4
00:00:07,181 --> 00:00:08,976
Oh.
Thank you, Myles.
5
00:00:08,976 --> 00:00:10,479
Uh, wow.
6
00:00:10,479 --> 00:00:12,274
A compliment, and it wasn't
a set up for a punchline.
7
00:00:12,274 --> 00:00:13,276
[ Chuckles ]
I know.
8
00:00:13,276 --> 00:00:14,780
I was waiting for,
"Nice sweater.
9
00:00:14,780 --> 00:00:16,407
Didn't know Bert and Ernie
had a yard sale."
10
00:00:16,407 --> 00:00:18,955
But the kids have actually
been really cool lately.
11
00:00:18,955 --> 00:00:20,875
And, like,
excited to learn?
12
00:00:20,875 --> 00:00:22,294
Yeah. No, same.
13
00:00:22,294 --> 00:00:24,423
No misbehaving.
The grades are up.
14
00:00:24,423 --> 00:00:26,512
And I'm getting flowers,
apparently.
15
00:00:26,512 --> 00:00:28,766
Like, are we awake?
[ Laughs ]
You know what?
16
00:00:28,766 --> 00:00:31,689
I think we have finally earned
their enthusiasm and respect.
17
00:00:31,689 --> 00:00:34,151
[ Scoffs ] Well, enthusiasm
I hoped for, but respect?
18
00:00:34,151 --> 00:00:35,613
One can only dream.
19
00:00:35,613 --> 00:00:38,703
Hey, Vick, what's Gucci?
20
00:00:38,703 --> 00:00:41,374
Ayy!
And great job
on your quiz.
21
00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:42,752
Somebody's been
putting in the work.
22
00:00:42,752 --> 00:00:44,590
Anything for you,
Mr. C!
23
00:00:44,590 --> 00:00:46,844
That was so cute.
24
00:00:46,844 --> 00:00:48,514
Wait.
Who is Mr. C?
25
00:00:48,514 --> 00:00:50,142
I don't know,
but I'm not gonna push it.
26
00:00:50,142 --> 00:00:52,271
I don't want to ruin
what we have by, like,
27
00:00:52,271 --> 00:00:54,358
asking a lot of questions,
right?
28
00:00:54,358 --> 00:00:56,070
Ava:
Oh, there you are, Jacob.
29
00:00:56,070 --> 00:00:57,782
My auntie's dog
needs her sweater back.
30
00:00:57,782 --> 00:01:00,329
[ Laughs ]
31
00:01:00,329 --> 00:01:02,207
Got 'eem.
32
00:01:04,713 --> 00:01:07,677
[ Maker's "Hold'em" playing ]
33
00:01:07,677 --> 00:01:16,277
♪♪
34
00:01:17,112 --> 00:01:18,991
Great job, guys!
35
00:01:18,991 --> 00:01:20,285
All A's and B's!
36
00:01:20,285 --> 00:01:21,955
We're all superstars
in this class.
37
00:01:21,955 --> 00:01:23,416
[ School bell rings ]
Oh. Alright, guys.
38
00:01:23,416 --> 00:01:25,379
Quietly and safely.
Quietly and safely.
39
00:01:25,379 --> 00:01:28,259
It's been a long year
with lots of ups and downs,
40
00:01:28,259 --> 00:01:30,472
but it was all worth it
to get here.
41
00:01:30,472 --> 00:01:33,436
Looks like someone finally has
this teaching thing figured out.
42
00:01:33,436 --> 00:01:35,023
Okay.
43
00:01:36,401 --> 00:01:37,904
[ Chuckles ]
44
00:01:37,904 --> 00:01:39,991
Looks like someone forgot
where the floor was.
45
00:01:39,991 --> 00:01:42,454
[ Chuckles ] Let me get some
paper towel and clean that up.
46
00:01:44,668 --> 00:01:47,549
Wait. What...
47
00:01:47,549 --> 00:01:49,553
What the...?
48
00:01:49,553 --> 00:01:51,347
Who did this?
49
00:01:55,230 --> 00:01:56,650
And I told my neighbor,
I said,
50
00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:58,361
"If you call 311
on a native tree,
51
00:01:58,361 --> 00:01:59,990
they are gonna rip it out
52
00:01:59,990 --> 00:02:03,246
without so much as
even consulting an arborist."
53
00:02:03,246 --> 00:02:04,833
And the hilarious thing
about all this --
54
00:02:04,833 --> 00:02:06,169
Nope.
55
00:02:06,169 --> 00:02:09,509
The hilarious things is, the
number for 311 isn't even 311 --
56
00:02:09,509 --> 00:02:11,597
Jacob, please. Stop.
57
00:02:13,057 --> 00:02:14,603
I'm sorry.
It's not you.
58
00:02:14,603 --> 00:02:16,022
Not me.
59
00:02:16,022 --> 00:02:18,401
"Jacob, stop" could have meant,
like, any Jacob.
60
00:02:18,401 --> 00:02:21,407
It's just, I had the whole,
um, principal job
61
00:02:21,407 --> 00:02:23,244
as my only goal
for awhile,
62
00:02:23,244 --> 00:02:25,373
and finding out that that's
not happening anytime soon
63
00:02:25,373 --> 00:02:27,127
has got me
thinking about a lot.
64
00:02:27,127 --> 00:02:28,672
No. I get it.
65
00:02:28,672 --> 00:02:30,175
Yeah, not in the mood
for a story.
66
00:02:30,175 --> 00:02:31,929
Got it.
67
00:02:31,929 --> 00:02:34,726
Hey. You guys want to
hear something weird?
68
00:02:34,726 --> 00:02:36,062
Janine,
read the room.
69
00:02:36,062 --> 00:02:37,941
We are not
in the mood for that.
70
00:02:37,941 --> 00:02:39,401
Okay, well,
then I won't tell you
71
00:02:39,401 --> 00:02:40,822
I found shoe prints
on my desks.
72
00:02:40,822 --> 00:02:42,115
Wait, no.
73
00:02:42,115 --> 00:02:44,579
You found shoe prints
on your desks?
74
00:02:44,579 --> 00:02:46,249
Yeah.
That's weird, right?
75
00:02:46,249 --> 00:02:47,752
Yeah.
Wait, hold up.
76
00:02:47,752 --> 00:02:49,798
I found some shoe prints
on my desks, too.
77
00:02:49,798 --> 00:02:51,133
I paid it dust.
78
00:02:51,133 --> 00:02:53,096
It's not the weirdest thing
I've found on my desks.
79
00:02:53,096 --> 00:02:54,641
Yeah.
I found some, too.
80
00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:56,102
I thought
I was going crazy.
81
00:02:56,102 --> 00:02:57,437
Wait,
so other people have
82
00:02:57,437 --> 00:02:58,607
found shoe prints
in their classrooms?
83
00:02:58,607 --> 00:03:00,110
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
84
00:03:00,110 --> 00:03:02,239
Well, nothing's going on
in my classroom.
85
00:03:02,239 --> 00:03:04,410
My desks are as clean
as a whistle.
86
00:03:04,410 --> 00:03:05,830
So, wait, if this is
happening to everybody
87
00:03:05,830 --> 00:03:07,374
except Barbara,
then what's going on?
88
00:03:07,374 --> 00:03:09,295
-It's weird.
-I mean, no idea.
89
00:03:09,295 --> 00:03:12,009
I know what's going on,
and it's bad.
90
00:03:12,009 --> 00:03:14,973
In fact, I've been praying that
it wouldn't breach our walls.
91
00:03:14,973 --> 00:03:16,894
Ghosts.
It's called desking.
92
00:03:16,894 --> 00:03:18,313
It's a new online challenge
93
00:03:18,313 --> 00:03:20,693
where kids jump from
desktop to desktop.
94
00:03:20,693 --> 00:03:23,616
Heard about it last week
through the custodial network.
95
00:03:23,616 --> 00:03:24,993
Mm.
96
00:03:24,993 --> 00:03:29,001
[ Children shouting ]
97
00:03:29,001 --> 00:03:30,420
These videos
are everywhere.
98
00:03:30,420 --> 00:03:33,051
Mr. Ronson over at
West Adams Elementary
99
00:03:33,051 --> 00:03:34,971
said he's been
cleaning desks for weeks.
100
00:03:34,971 --> 00:03:36,683
-Ohh.
-Oh, geez.
101
00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:38,478
Student: Go! Go! Go!
You got this!
102
00:03:38,478 --> 00:03:40,273
Oh, my God!
There's hundreds of these!
103
00:03:40,273 --> 00:03:41,610
This is horrible!
104
00:03:41,610 --> 00:03:43,530
This can't be what's happening
here, though, right?
105
00:03:43,530 --> 00:03:45,200
I mean, our kids respect us
too much.
106
00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:47,872
[ Laughs ]
107
00:03:47,872 --> 00:03:49,751
Someone could
really get hurt here.
108
00:03:49,751 --> 00:03:51,212
I've already been hurt.
109
00:03:51,212 --> 00:03:52,590
I know about every
Internet trend.
110
00:03:52,590 --> 00:03:54,176
How did I not
find out about this?
111
00:03:54,176 --> 00:03:56,430
[ Sighs ] We need to
get to the bottom of this.
112
00:03:56,430 --> 00:03:58,769
You know what? I bet you
I can get a shoe print.
113
00:03:58,769 --> 00:04:00,230
Did you clean
your desks off yet?
114
00:04:00,230 --> 00:04:02,275
No.
Nasty.
115
00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:04,446
Okay, does anybody
know shoes?
116
00:04:07,452 --> 00:04:09,498
My boyfriend, Zach,
is a total sneaker-head.
117
00:04:09,498 --> 00:04:11,293
He -- He loves shoes
more than anything.
118
00:04:11,293 --> 00:04:14,383
Well, except ya boy.
[ Chuckles ]
119
00:04:14,383 --> 00:04:16,262
That's me. I'm "ya boy."
120
00:04:16,972 --> 00:04:19,602
Okay. It doesn't look like
anything I can find online.
121
00:04:19,602 --> 00:04:21,480
When's your
shoe guy get here?
122
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,443
Uh, he is
on his way.
123
00:04:23,443 --> 00:04:25,363
So this Zach,
he lives with you?
124
00:04:25,363 --> 00:04:27,117
Yeah. He just moved in
last month.
125
00:04:27,117 --> 00:04:28,620
And that's going well?
126
00:04:28,620 --> 00:04:30,457
Yep.
He's so great.
127
00:04:30,457 --> 00:04:34,006
So he knew you
and was like...more?
128
00:04:35,383 --> 00:04:37,764
Well, I think he sounds like
a really neat guy, right?
129
00:04:37,764 --> 00:04:39,684
-Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
-Sure. Yeah.
130
00:04:39,684 --> 00:04:41,437
Heyyy.
There's my guy.
131
00:04:41,437 --> 00:04:42,607
Black?!
132
00:04:42,607 --> 00:04:44,109
It's actually
pronounced "Zach."
133
00:04:44,109 --> 00:04:45,361
You must be Ava.
134
00:04:46,030 --> 00:04:47,199
You were
all thinking it.
135
00:04:47,199 --> 00:04:48,367
I see you.
Don't look at me like that.
136
00:04:48,367 --> 00:04:50,121
We always look at you
like this.
137
00:04:50,121 --> 00:04:52,209
It's very nice to
meet you, Zach.
[ Chuckles ]
138
00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:54,004
Well, if it isn't
my pizza crust queen.
139
00:04:54,004 --> 00:04:55,423
[ Both laugh ]
140
00:04:55,423 --> 00:04:59,056
We went out to eat last week
and I ate all his pizza crust.
141
00:04:59,056 --> 00:05:00,350
I don't like to waste food.
142
00:05:00,350 --> 00:05:01,770
Wait, is this
our desker?
143
00:05:01,770 --> 00:05:02,855
Yes.
144
00:05:02,855 --> 00:05:04,692
Huh.
145
00:05:04,692 --> 00:05:06,362
Huh? What -- What do you
mean by "huh"?
146
00:05:06,362 --> 00:05:07,698
It looked smaller
in the pic.
147
00:05:07,698 --> 00:05:09,744
This is way too big
to be a second grader.
148
00:05:09,744 --> 00:05:12,332
They laughing
in our faces.
Mm-hmm.
149
00:05:12,332 --> 00:05:14,294
If this was
a small adult sneaker,
150
00:05:14,294 --> 00:05:18,512
it increases the make and model
options significantly.
151
00:05:18,512 --> 00:05:20,516
He's so smart.
[ Chuckles ]
152
00:05:20,516 --> 00:05:22,979
We came in 3rd at trivia night
last week over at Oscar's.
153
00:05:22,979 --> 00:05:24,106
You know,
down by Rittenhouse.
154
00:05:24,106 --> 00:05:25,609
We were eliminated
on a technicality,
155
00:05:25,609 --> 00:05:27,320
but Sri Lanka,
if you didn't know --
156
00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:29,158
Honey, where is
this story going?
157
00:05:29,158 --> 00:05:31,580
Are we focusing on
the task at hand?
158
00:05:31,580 --> 00:05:34,084
Mnh. No, we're not.
I'm so sorry. Please continue.
159
00:05:34,084 --> 00:05:37,007
Did he just stop Jacob
from being...himself?
160
00:05:37,007 --> 00:05:39,261
Can we put him in glass
and break in case of emergency?
161
00:05:39,261 --> 00:05:40,931
Alright,
let's get to work.
162
00:05:40,931 --> 00:05:43,311
They say the first 48 hours
are the most important.
163
00:05:43,311 --> 00:05:45,064
Wait, wait, wait.
Hold on.
164
00:05:45,064 --> 00:05:47,110
Are those the black and grey
asymmetric midsoles?
165
00:05:48,446 --> 00:05:51,452
I decided to be adventurous
and wear sneakers today.
166
00:05:51,452 --> 00:05:52,914
Sick.
167
00:05:52,914 --> 00:05:54,291
[ Snaps fingers ]
168
00:05:54,291 --> 00:05:56,003
-Alright.
-Okay. Thank you.
169
00:05:57,798 --> 00:05:59,384
I like him.
Mm.
170
00:05:59,384 --> 00:06:00,971
Still don't know
how he lives with Jacob.
171
00:06:00,971 --> 00:06:03,184
You think his neck gets tired
from all the nodding?
172
00:06:03,184 --> 00:06:05,146
Mm-hmm.
173
00:06:05,146 --> 00:06:06,524
[ School bell rings ]
174
00:06:06,524 --> 00:06:08,904
Just got an e-mail from Zach.
Subject: "You're welcome."
175
00:06:08,904 --> 00:06:10,031
-Ooh.
-Oh.
176
00:06:10,031 --> 00:06:12,285
Oh, we about to bust
this case wide open.
177
00:06:12,285 --> 00:06:14,039
Uh...okay.
178
00:06:14,039 --> 00:06:16,670
He says that while he initially
leaned Jordan 5s,
179
00:06:16,670 --> 00:06:18,172
the faint line at
the mid-arch
180
00:06:18,172 --> 00:06:20,719
indicates a swoosh
and not the Jumpman logo --
181
00:06:20,719 --> 00:06:22,013
Okay.
Scroll. Scroll.
182
00:06:22,013 --> 00:06:24,393
Is there a picture?
Yeah.
183
00:06:24,393 --> 00:06:26,230
-Oh.
-Ooh.
184
00:06:26,230 --> 00:06:27,440
Okay, well,
this is great.
185
00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:29,194
All we have to do is
look at the kids' feet,
186
00:06:29,194 --> 00:06:31,198
which is something I would say
we normally wouldn't do, but...
187
00:06:31,198 --> 00:06:32,702
No. We don't.
188
00:06:32,702 --> 00:06:34,246
'Cause I've only seen those
on two kids --
189
00:06:34,246 --> 00:06:35,874
Brianna and Stefon.
190
00:06:35,874 --> 00:06:38,087
Yeah, but let's not rush out
and make accusations.
191
00:06:38,087 --> 00:06:40,174
Ava:
I'm coming for you!
192
00:06:43,932 --> 00:06:46,980
Okay, let's split 'em up
and make 'em sing.
193
00:06:46,980 --> 00:06:49,109
Two of you take Stefon,
the other two take Brianna.
194
00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:50,863
Right.
Good cop, bad cop.
195
00:06:50,863 --> 00:06:52,867
You know, it's interesting that
they say "good cop, bad cop,"
196
00:06:52,867 --> 00:06:54,996
because policing in
this country is so broken,
197
00:06:54,996 --> 00:06:56,791
it's really just
"bad cop, bad cop."
198
00:06:56,791 --> 00:06:59,129
Janine,
you're with him.
Got it.
199
00:06:59,129 --> 00:07:01,341
Look, Stefon,
I get it.
200
00:07:01,341 --> 00:07:03,137
I was a kid once.
201
00:07:03,137 --> 00:07:05,141
But you and I both know
this is gonna end,
202
00:07:05,141 --> 00:07:06,770
and when it does,
you don't wanna be the one
203
00:07:06,770 --> 00:07:08,189
left holding the bag.
204
00:07:08,189 --> 00:07:09,776
'Cause that's exactly
what's gonna happen
205
00:07:09,776 --> 00:07:12,113
when your friend over there
starts talking.
206
00:07:12,113 --> 00:07:13,449
I bet she ratting you out
right now
207
00:07:13,449 --> 00:07:14,786
like a little
Fredo Corleone.
208
00:07:14,786 --> 00:07:16,998
So I would talk
if I were you.
209
00:07:16,998 --> 00:07:18,585
'Cause you don't want me
sending you over to
210
00:07:18,585 --> 00:07:20,379
Ms. Teagues
and Mr. Hill.
211
00:07:20,379 --> 00:07:23,177
I don't think you'd like
what's going on in that room.
212
00:07:23,177 --> 00:07:27,937
Look, sometimes, sometimes,
the right thing is fun.
213
00:07:27,937 --> 00:07:29,022
[ Chuckles ]
214
00:07:29,022 --> 00:07:31,193
So why don't you tell us
who started this
215
00:07:31,193 --> 00:07:33,114
and who's doing it?
216
00:07:33,114 --> 00:07:34,659
You know,
doesn't that sound fun?
217
00:07:36,161 --> 00:07:37,623
Okay, kid.
218
00:07:37,623 --> 00:07:40,211
First one to talk,
first one to walk.
219
00:07:40,211 --> 00:07:41,756
How'd those shoes
get on that desk?
220
00:07:41,756 --> 00:07:44,177
Name names!
Yeah, name names.
221
00:07:44,177 --> 00:07:46,014
TikTok, Twitch,
Discord?
222
00:07:46,014 --> 00:07:47,267
Just tell me where
they setting them trends
223
00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:48,770
and you can leave.
Yeah.
224
00:07:48,770 --> 00:07:50,356
No. We got to
get a confession.
225
00:07:50,356 --> 00:07:52,360
Squeal, and you can
Dipset like Cam'ron.
226
00:07:56,285 --> 00:07:57,746
You know what?
One second.
227
00:07:57,746 --> 00:08:00,752
[ Quietly ] Okay.
She's not talking.
228
00:08:00,752 --> 00:08:02,715
Okay. Uh, let me
try something, okay?
229
00:08:02,715 --> 00:08:04,426
Um...
[ Chuckles ]
230
00:08:04,426 --> 00:08:06,890
You look
a little thirsty.
231
00:08:06,890 --> 00:08:09,144
Oh,
look what I found.
232
00:08:09,144 --> 00:08:12,066
A nice, cold,
refreshing juice.
233
00:08:12,066 --> 00:08:13,444
I bet you'd like
some juice.
234
00:08:13,444 --> 00:08:15,574
I'm fine.
Oh, okay.
235
00:08:15,574 --> 00:08:18,162
'Cause me?
I'm thirsty.
236
00:08:22,086 --> 00:08:24,466
[ Quietly ]
I can't get it in.
237
00:08:24,466 --> 00:08:26,261
You -- You have
to twist it.
238
00:08:26,261 --> 00:08:28,390
Yeah. No. I can --
I can do it myself.
239
00:08:29,644 --> 00:08:30,938
Ah.
240
00:08:30,938 --> 00:08:32,775
Oh.
241
00:08:35,071 --> 00:08:36,824
I'm sorry, you tired?
242
00:08:36,824 --> 00:08:38,327
Want some coffee?
243
00:08:38,327 --> 00:08:40,456
'Cause I can do this
all day, kid.
244
00:08:40,456 --> 00:08:43,003
I got all the time
in the world.
245
00:08:43,003 --> 00:08:44,507
No, we don't.
246
00:08:44,507 --> 00:08:46,678
Tell me who started this
viral sensation,
247
00:08:46,678 --> 00:08:48,013
or I swear to God...
248
00:08:48,013 --> 00:08:49,349
Boy, if you test me.
249
00:08:49,349 --> 00:08:50,686
Okay, Ava,
let's go outside.
250
00:08:50,686 --> 00:08:52,188
Don't you play with me, boy.
Now, Ava.
251
00:08:52,815 --> 00:08:56,029
Can't believe
neither of them talked.
252
00:08:56,029 --> 00:08:57,323
I'm actually
sort of proud.
253
00:08:57,323 --> 00:08:59,912
Alright, let 'em out.
254
00:08:59,912 --> 00:09:01,583
Alright, let's go.
255
00:09:04,170 --> 00:09:06,216
We're gonna figure this out,
you guys.
256
00:09:06,216 --> 00:09:07,845
Yeah.
Somebody's gonna slip up.
257
00:09:07,845 --> 00:09:09,222
It's out of your control,
oldhead.
258
00:09:09,222 --> 00:09:11,686
Abbott's gonna be number one
in this challenge.
259
00:09:11,686 --> 00:09:14,274
Wait. You're trying to be
number one in all of Philly?
260
00:09:14,274 --> 00:09:17,656
In all of
the United States.
Of America.
261
00:09:17,656 --> 00:09:19,409
It's bigger than
you can imagine.
262
00:09:19,409 --> 00:09:21,163
Bigger than me.
Bigger than you.
263
00:09:21,163 --> 00:09:23,042
You'll never stop this.
264
00:09:23,042 --> 00:09:24,795
Okay.
Get back to class.
Yeah.
265
00:09:24,795 --> 00:09:26,089
No problem.
266
00:09:26,089 --> 00:09:27,425
[ Whispering ]
That's where the desks are.
267
00:09:32,101 --> 00:09:33,855
Okay, since none
of the kids are talking,
268
00:09:33,855 --> 00:09:35,024
we gotta catch
one of them in the act.
269
00:09:35,024 --> 00:09:37,863
Then we flip that kid,
follow it up to the top.
270
00:09:37,863 --> 00:09:39,407
Who wants to go fishing?
271
00:09:39,407 --> 00:09:40,786
Okay.
272
00:09:40,786 --> 00:09:43,040
Well, nobody is jumping up
on my desks,
273
00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:45,921
so this is feeling like
y'all's problem.
274
00:09:45,921 --> 00:09:48,008
I could do a "21 Jump Street"
kind of thing.
275
00:09:48,008 --> 00:09:50,096
If I put on the right hat,
I could pull off 13.
276
00:09:50,096 --> 00:09:51,557
I don't think so.
[ Chuckles ]
277
00:09:51,557 --> 00:09:52,935
How about we get you
some platform shoes
278
00:09:52,935 --> 00:09:54,437
and you can pull off 12.
Okay.
279
00:09:54,437 --> 00:09:56,024
I can catch one of 'em.
280
00:09:56,024 --> 00:09:58,237
Haven't done this kind of
fishing in a minute.
281
00:09:58,237 --> 00:09:59,907
Let's go.
282
00:09:59,907 --> 00:10:01,869
I didn't volunteer.
283
00:10:01,869 --> 00:10:04,290
A stakeout needs two people.
Think, boy.
284
00:10:04,290 --> 00:10:06,044
Who's gonna watch
all the crime stuff
285
00:10:06,044 --> 00:10:07,548
while the other one
eats a hoagie?
286
00:10:07,548 --> 00:10:09,384
I...
[ Door opens ]
287
00:10:09,384 --> 00:10:11,138
We're going about this
all wrong.
288
00:10:11,138 --> 00:10:12,516
You know,
you don't build a dam
289
00:10:12,516 --> 00:10:14,018
in the middle of
a rushing river.
290
00:10:14,018 --> 00:10:16,231
You build it
before the water comes.
291
00:10:16,231 --> 00:10:18,193
That is so wise.
What the hell are you
talking about?
292
00:10:18,193 --> 00:10:21,158
If we talk to the younger kids
about the dangers of desking
293
00:10:21,158 --> 00:10:22,911
and how it actually
isn't cool beans,
294
00:10:22,911 --> 00:10:25,082
then we stop the desking
before the flood.
295
00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:26,586
And I think
they'll listen to us,
296
00:10:26,586 --> 00:10:29,717
because they don't look at us
as teachers and students.
297
00:10:29,717 --> 00:10:33,015
We've built bonds this year
that are deeper than that.
298
00:10:33,015 --> 00:10:34,434
Oh, please.
That's not gonna work.
299
00:10:34,434 --> 00:10:36,313
I think that's
a great idea.
Not in a million years.
300
00:10:36,313 --> 00:10:38,610
Okay, we get
a kid to rat, okay?
Barbara: Uh-huh.
301
00:10:39,862 --> 00:10:42,659
I FaceTimed
my own iPad from my phone
302
00:10:42,659 --> 00:10:44,622
and left my phone
in Janine's room
303
00:10:44,622 --> 00:10:46,208
so we could
survey the scene.
304
00:10:46,208 --> 00:10:48,963
Ah.
This ain't my first rodeo,
hombre.
305
00:10:48,963 --> 00:10:52,386
[ Chuckles ]
I've staken out before.
306
00:10:52,386 --> 00:10:53,890
You stake out
other classrooms?
307
00:10:53,890 --> 00:10:55,560
No, you creep.
308
00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:57,856
I did private investigator
work back in the day.
309
00:10:57,856 --> 00:10:59,985
You were a private investigator
before a custodian?
310
00:10:59,985 --> 00:11:02,533
No, before I worked
at the rodeo.
311
00:11:02,533 --> 00:11:04,035
Oh. Sorry.
312
00:11:04,035 --> 00:11:05,539
I just -- I thought that,
you know...
313
00:11:05,539 --> 00:11:07,751
What, that I've been a custodian
my whole life?
314
00:11:07,751 --> 00:11:09,128
No, man.
315
00:11:09,128 --> 00:11:10,549
I worked
as a pipe fitter,
316
00:11:10,549 --> 00:11:13,136
a minor league baseball
bunting coach,
317
00:11:13,136 --> 00:11:17,228
a tastefully nude model,
sold RVs for summer.
318
00:11:17,228 --> 00:11:19,440
Might find a new path
after this.
319
00:11:20,819 --> 00:11:23,533
Wait, you never dreamed of
just doing one thing?
320
00:11:23,533 --> 00:11:25,119
Sure, I have.
321
00:11:25,119 --> 00:11:26,789
But a dream can be
a distraction
322
00:11:26,789 --> 00:11:28,626
just as easy as
it can be a goal.
323
00:11:32,801 --> 00:11:34,345
We got movement!
324
00:11:34,345 --> 00:11:36,308
Show yourself, coward!
325
00:11:36,308 --> 00:11:39,105
Aw, man, it's just
Janine and Jacob.
326
00:11:39,105 --> 00:11:40,775
Let's go.
327
00:11:40,775 --> 00:11:42,946
No one's gonna go desking
with teachers in the room.
328
00:11:45,911 --> 00:11:48,248
Janine: Alright!
329
00:11:49,835 --> 00:11:52,048
Interesting.
330
00:11:52,048 --> 00:11:57,391
So, we have gathered you here
today, dearly B-students...
331
00:11:57,391 --> 00:11:58,770
[ Chuckles ]
332
00:11:58,770 --> 00:12:01,149
Get it?
Okay. Keep going.
We knew it was 50/50.
333
00:12:01,149 --> 00:12:04,531
Yeah. We are here today
to talk about desking.
334
00:12:04,531 --> 00:12:06,326
What's desking?
335
00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:07,704
Ah, good question.
336
00:12:07,704 --> 00:12:11,419
Desking is getting from one side
of the classroom to the other
337
00:12:11,419 --> 00:12:13,298
by hopping on
the tops of desks.
338
00:12:13,298 --> 00:12:14,927
I never heard of it.
339
00:12:14,927 --> 00:12:16,179
I wanna do it!
340
00:12:16,179 --> 00:12:17,516
Is she
messing with you,
341
00:12:17,516 --> 00:12:19,102
or are we just teaching
more kids what it is?
342
00:12:19,102 --> 00:12:20,229
No, no, no, no.
343
00:12:20,229 --> 00:12:23,360
Look,
is desking cool beans?
344
00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:25,406
Sure, it is. Right?
345
00:12:25,406 --> 00:12:26,826
But me
and my dawg here...
346
00:12:26,826 --> 00:12:28,078
[ Barks ]
347
00:12:28,078 --> 00:12:29,455
...are not here to
lie to you
348
00:12:29,455 --> 00:12:31,961
and pretend that desking
isn't cool.
349
00:12:31,961 --> 00:12:35,384
But guess what's
maybe even more cool?
350
00:12:35,384 --> 00:12:36,887
Huh?
351
00:12:38,850 --> 00:12:39,977
[ Cheers and applause ]
352
00:12:39,977 --> 00:12:42,691
Okay!
Are you hearing this?
353
00:12:45,864 --> 00:12:48,118
Teamwork! Teamwork!
354
00:12:48,118 --> 00:12:51,584
[ Cheers and applause ]
355
00:12:51,584 --> 00:12:54,590
It went great!
It really did.
356
00:12:54,590 --> 00:12:56,677
I mean, I'm surprised,
but also not surprised.
[ Cellphone rings ]
357
00:12:56,677 --> 00:12:58,765
The kids were
so invested --
Hello.
358
00:12:58,765 --> 00:13:00,810
Hey, I'm sending you a video
that you need to watch.
359
00:13:00,810 --> 00:13:02,773
Wait, wait. Why are you
FaceTiming me? I'm at work.
360
00:13:02,773 --> 00:13:04,275
'Cause I want to be
referenced in the story
361
00:13:04,275 --> 00:13:05,528
when you tell it later.
362
00:13:05,528 --> 00:13:08,075
Love you, bye!
Uh...
363
00:13:08,075 --> 00:13:10,747
Oh, my God. Zach has been
so great during all of this.
364
00:13:10,747 --> 00:13:12,876
I know. He can get
a little obsessive, but...
365
00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:15,047
Well, so can you.
Me? No.
366
00:13:15,047 --> 00:13:17,343
No, Zach calls me
"lovingly over-passionate."
367
00:13:18,679 --> 00:13:20,224
You know what?
That's wonderful.
368
00:13:20,224 --> 00:13:22,604
Oh, my God, it's a video
of you and me from just now.
369
00:13:22,604 --> 00:13:23,981
Oh! Oh, my God.
370
00:13:23,981 --> 00:13:25,359
Like two minutes ago?
That's so cool.
371
00:13:25,359 --> 00:13:27,739
The kids are already
spreading our message!
372
00:13:27,739 --> 00:13:30,202
[ Cheers and applause ]
373
00:13:34,753 --> 00:13:38,301
Yep, there they are,
spreading your message.
374
00:13:38,301 --> 00:13:40,640
Ava: Aw, man. Why am I not
getting these videos?
375
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:41,851
I've done everything
I possibly can
376
00:13:41,851 --> 00:13:43,270
to make my phone think
I'm 22.
377
00:13:43,270 --> 00:13:44,898
I haven't used
capital letters in years.
378
00:13:44,898 --> 00:13:46,944
My God. I cannot believe
they betrayed our trust.
379
00:13:46,944 --> 00:13:48,405
Okay, alright,
we need -- we need to just
380
00:13:48,405 --> 00:13:49,867
make sure that this is
an isolated incident and --
381
00:13:49,867 --> 00:13:51,035
[ Door opens ]
Yeah.
382
00:13:51,035 --> 00:13:54,208
Sweet baby Jesus,
and the grown one, too!
383
00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:56,421
My desks
have been desked!
384
00:13:56,421 --> 00:13:58,216
They got you?
Mm-hmm.
385
00:13:58,216 --> 00:13:59,468
Oh,
this is bad.
386
00:13:59,468 --> 00:14:00,597
Mnh!
Their fault.
387
00:14:00,597 --> 00:14:02,391
They went on a desking
promotional tour.
388
00:14:02,391 --> 00:14:04,897
No, uh --
What have you done?
389
00:14:06,567 --> 00:14:07,611
Alright.
390
00:14:07,611 --> 00:14:08,613
Guys?
391
00:14:10,533 --> 00:14:12,494
They have
made fools of us.
392
00:14:12,494 --> 00:14:14,791
I really thought that
they looked at us as
more than just teachers
393
00:14:14,791 --> 00:14:16,085
but, like, friends.
394
00:14:16,085 --> 00:14:18,089
Maybe
that's the problem.
395
00:14:18,089 --> 00:14:19,760
They like us so much,
396
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:21,597
they've forgotten that
we're authority figures.
397
00:14:21,597 --> 00:14:24,018
Whoa.
398
00:14:24,018 --> 00:14:25,855
We're actually
too cool for school.
399
00:14:25,855 --> 00:14:28,026
Mm-hmm. And now this thing
is spreading everywhere.
400
00:14:28,026 --> 00:14:29,863
We are losing control.
We're out of moves.
401
00:14:29,863 --> 00:14:31,533
You lose Barbara,
you lose the war.
402
00:14:34,790 --> 00:14:36,502
We might have
one move left.
403
00:14:36,502 --> 00:14:37,921
We can tell
the school district.
404
00:14:37,921 --> 00:14:39,633
This is happening
all over the city.
405
00:14:39,633 --> 00:14:41,260
Of Philadelphia.
Yeah.
406
00:14:41,260 --> 00:14:43,139
So they will bring
that hammer down
407
00:14:43,139 --> 00:14:44,601
and put an end
to all this.
408
00:14:44,601 --> 00:14:45,853
[ Inhales sharply ]
409
00:14:45,853 --> 00:14:47,565
Do we really want to
become narcs?
410
00:14:49,443 --> 00:14:50,947
I prefer "heroes."
411
00:14:52,366 --> 00:14:54,078
So they were receptive?
Oh, very receptive.
412
00:14:54,078 --> 00:14:55,372
They don't
want to be sued
413
00:14:55,372 --> 00:14:56,875
if some kid
slips and falls on a desk.
414
00:14:56,875 --> 00:14:59,255
Hey, Ally,
what -- what are you doing?
415
00:14:59,255 --> 00:15:00,591
You ain't hear?
416
00:15:00,591 --> 00:15:02,428
The school district's making us
take all our desks
417
00:15:02,428 --> 00:15:05,225
out of our classrooms.
Ava: Somebody snitched.
418
00:15:05,225 --> 00:15:07,856
Told the school district that we
have some dangerous viral trend
419
00:15:07,856 --> 00:15:10,318
that could leave the city
at risk for "legal culpability."
420
00:15:10,318 --> 00:15:12,741
All because I wasn't trying to
solve the problem at all.
421
00:15:12,741 --> 00:15:15,037
What idiot thought the school
district was gonna help?
422
00:15:15,037 --> 00:15:17,876
Huh. What -- Yeah, what
well-intentioned idiot?
423
00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:20,380
Get all your desks to
the gym until this
whole thing blows over
424
00:15:20,380 --> 00:15:21,967
or there's some new trend
that I don't hear about
425
00:15:21,967 --> 00:15:24,263
because life is a joke,
people.
426
00:15:24,263 --> 00:15:25,767
Come on. Hurry up.
427
00:15:25,767 --> 00:15:27,645
Who knows when those kids'll
start arriving.
428
00:15:27,645 --> 00:15:29,775
They get here at 7:30.
429
00:15:29,775 --> 00:15:31,820
Every day?
430
00:15:31,820 --> 00:15:32,906
That's wild.
431
00:15:35,787 --> 00:15:37,624
Janine, how many times
is tattling
432
00:15:37,624 --> 00:15:40,170
gonna bite you in the culo
before you quit being a narc?
433
00:15:40,170 --> 00:15:43,594
Mm. I am too old to be doing
all of this.
434
00:15:43,594 --> 00:15:45,848
At least you guys are on
the same floor as the gym.
435
00:15:48,394 --> 00:15:50,817
Look, guys, I know this is
a minor inconvenience,
436
00:15:50,817 --> 00:15:52,529
but at least
we stopped desking.
437
00:15:52,529 --> 00:15:55,408
Right? Yay!
Mm.
438
00:15:55,408 --> 00:15:58,707
Or we've created the greatest
desking arena ever known to man.
439
00:16:02,799 --> 00:16:05,137
What fresh hell
is this?
440
00:16:05,137 --> 00:16:07,432
Oh, Janine.
441
00:16:11,357 --> 00:16:13,278
It's like desking
Six Flags!
442
00:16:13,278 --> 00:16:15,700
We are just leading the children
into temptation, like Satan.
443
00:16:15,700 --> 00:16:17,119
Mm-hmm.
444
00:16:17,119 --> 00:16:19,123
Is it that bad?
445
00:16:19,123 --> 00:16:21,712
I think if I was a young person
who was interested in desking,
446
00:16:21,712 --> 00:16:23,632
it might, you know,
call to me.
447
00:16:23,632 --> 00:16:25,427
Relax, y'all.
448
00:16:25,427 --> 00:16:27,222
I've been refreshing all my
feeds, and we're in the clear.
449
00:16:27,222 --> 00:16:28,809
There's no way the kids
know about this.
450
00:16:28,809 --> 00:16:31,105
You sure about that?
451
00:16:31,105 --> 00:16:33,443
[ Electronic voice ]
By the end of the week,
452
00:16:33,443 --> 00:16:37,284
I will desk
the Abbott Elementary Gym.
453
00:16:37,284 --> 00:16:38,411
[ Door squeaks open ]
454
00:16:38,411 --> 00:16:40,290
-Oh, nooooo.
-No!
455
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:42,670
Okay, look.
No, no, no. No.
456
00:16:42,670 --> 00:16:44,381
Don't worry, don't worry,
because we'll just take turns
457
00:16:44,381 --> 00:16:46,135
guarding the entrance.
No!
458
00:16:46,135 --> 00:16:47,972
Why is my Internet not
sending me anything cool?
459
00:16:47,972 --> 00:16:50,435
I should have gotten that video
before Mr. Johnson.
460
00:16:50,435 --> 00:16:51,980
No offense, boo.
[ Chuckles ]
461
00:16:51,980 --> 00:16:53,734
It is not your phone,
Ava.
462
00:16:53,734 --> 00:16:56,990
You are not one of them.
You are not a Jojo Sea-bass.
463
00:16:56,990 --> 00:16:58,577
You mean JoJo Siwa?
464
00:16:58,577 --> 00:17:00,247
I don't know what I mean,
Janine.
465
00:17:00,247 --> 00:17:01,875
That's the point.
466
00:17:01,875 --> 00:17:04,129
But I do know that you all
need to stop pretending
467
00:17:04,129 --> 00:17:06,133
like you can relate to
these children.
468
00:17:06,133 --> 00:17:09,431
Because when you do,
it just seems sad, desperate,
469
00:17:09,431 --> 00:17:10,851
and embarrassing.
470
00:17:10,851 --> 00:17:12,981
Mm.
471
00:17:12,981 --> 00:17:15,528
You heard Barbara.
Y'all are embarrassing.
472
00:17:20,997 --> 00:17:24,253
I know your plan.
Move it along.
473
00:17:24,253 --> 00:17:27,259
That face don't work
on me.
474
00:17:30,516 --> 00:17:32,060
Need a partner
for this shift?
475
00:17:32,060 --> 00:17:33,606
Oh, no. I'm good.
476
00:17:33,606 --> 00:17:36,277
Just need two men for
a stakeout and a foot chase.
477
00:17:36,277 --> 00:17:39,033
Right.
478
00:17:39,033 --> 00:17:40,911
Alright,
what do you want?
479
00:17:40,911 --> 00:17:42,372
You remember what you were
talking about?
480
00:17:42,372 --> 00:17:44,126
Nope.
[ Chuckles ]
481
00:17:44,126 --> 00:17:46,798
About having
a lot of jobs.
482
00:17:46,798 --> 00:17:48,969
You ever have an experience
where you wanted a different job
483
00:17:48,969 --> 00:17:50,723
than the one
you were at?
484
00:17:50,723 --> 00:17:52,602
You liked the one
that you were at,
485
00:17:52,602 --> 00:17:55,733
but since it's not the one
that you thought you wanted,
486
00:17:55,733 --> 00:17:57,444
you're
a little conflicted?
487
00:17:57,444 --> 00:17:59,658
If you think
I'm some sort of black Yoda...
488
00:17:59,658 --> 00:18:03,081
Hmm, then correct you
would be, Padawan.
489
00:18:03,081 --> 00:18:06,045
You got to be open
for what life brings you.
490
00:18:06,045 --> 00:18:07,674
If I'd kept aiming for
that one job
491
00:18:07,674 --> 00:18:10,011
I wanted so much
when I was your age,
492
00:18:10,011 --> 00:18:14,061
you'd be looking at a very
unfulfilled operations manager
493
00:18:14,061 --> 00:18:16,942
at
Uncle Bradley's Baked Beans.
494
00:18:16,942 --> 00:18:18,570
Damn,
I wanted that job.
495
00:18:18,570 --> 00:18:20,240
Must have had some
good benefits.
496
00:18:20,240 --> 00:18:22,704
And a ladder
straight to the top.
Yeah.
497
00:18:22,704 --> 00:18:25,918
But, hey,
without that rejection,
498
00:18:25,918 --> 00:18:28,549
I never would have found out
the stuff that I love.
499
00:18:28,549 --> 00:18:31,429
Yeah, man. I really
wanted to be principal.
500
00:18:31,429 --> 00:18:33,349
[ Chuckles ]
501
00:18:33,349 --> 00:18:36,021
Then it didn't happen
and...
502
00:18:36,021 --> 00:18:38,359
and now I think
I'm mad.
503
00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:40,823
You got plenty of time,
youngin'.
504
00:18:40,823 --> 00:18:42,325
Janine:
Attentions, please!
505
00:18:42,325 --> 00:18:44,204
[ Chuckles ]
506
00:18:44,204 --> 00:18:47,670
I really felt like I was
bonding with these kids
507
00:18:47,670 --> 00:18:49,674
and that they liked me,
508
00:18:49,674 --> 00:18:52,345
and as much as I felt that,
509
00:18:52,345 --> 00:18:56,020
and as much as Ava
wants to be cool,
510
00:18:56,020 --> 00:18:58,024
Barbara was right.
511
00:18:58,024 --> 00:19:00,946
Kids will always
think teachers are lame.
512
00:19:00,946 --> 00:19:05,121
Can't fight that,
but we can use it.
513
00:19:05,121 --> 00:19:09,379
Once I do this
and those kids see it,
514
00:19:09,379 --> 00:19:12,260
desking will be corny
and over.
515
00:19:13,346 --> 00:19:14,849
Jacob, we rolling?
516
00:19:14,849 --> 00:19:17,020
[ Rhythmic clapping ]
Melissa: Kill it!
517
00:19:17,020 --> 00:19:18,397
You got this, Janine.
518
00:19:18,397 --> 00:19:20,151
Whoo!
[ Whistles ]
Don't --
Don't say that.
519
00:19:20,151 --> 00:19:21,988
I don't believe
that she does.
No. She's got it.
520
00:19:21,988 --> 00:19:23,324
She's not
very coordinated.
She's gonna kill it.
521
00:19:23,324 --> 00:19:24,619
Oh!
[ Thud ]
522
00:19:24,619 --> 00:19:26,665
God.
And she's down.
523
00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:29,127
Oh. Oh. I'm okay. No.
Ow. I'm okay.
524
00:19:29,127 --> 00:19:31,633
Ow. No, no, no.
I can still do this.
525
00:19:31,633 --> 00:19:33,637
You know, this is
my Kerri Strug moment.
526
00:19:33,637 --> 00:19:35,891
No, it's your "stay down and
let me get you some ice" moment.
527
00:19:35,891 --> 00:19:37,352
Okay?
Y-Your ankle's blowing up.
528
00:19:37,352 --> 00:19:39,147
You're not gonna be walking,
let alone desking.
529
00:19:39,147 --> 00:19:40,818
But someone has to do this.
530
00:19:40,818 --> 00:19:42,947
Someone the kids will think
is really lame.
531
00:19:49,251 --> 00:19:50,420
You got this, Jacob.
Yes.
532
00:19:50,420 --> 00:19:51,882
Come on, man.
533
00:19:51,882 --> 00:19:54,094
Hey.
I got your sneakers.
534
00:19:54,094 --> 00:19:56,265
I've been begging him
to wear these.
535
00:19:56,265 --> 00:19:57,852
These are
the Honeydews.
536
00:19:57,852 --> 00:19:59,731
Now, some people think that
this color is sea glass,
537
00:19:59,731 --> 00:20:01,568
but that's completely ignoring
the history of the entire --
538
00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:03,279
Babe, babe,
task at hand.
539
00:20:03,279 --> 00:20:05,283
Ah. You're right.
I'm doing it again.
540
00:20:05,283 --> 00:20:08,665
Anyways, the point is these were
built for comfort and speed.
541
00:20:08,665 --> 00:20:10,920
Also,
I brought your shorts.
542
00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:12,422
Oh, thanks, babe.
543
00:20:12,422 --> 00:20:14,928
So, just out of curiosity,
how'd you guys meet?
544
00:20:14,928 --> 00:20:17,725
Ohh, I was in a late night
line for sneakers,
545
00:20:17,725 --> 00:20:20,606
and he was there protesting
the inhumane work conditions
546
00:20:20,606 --> 00:20:22,484
of the place making
the sneakers.
547
00:20:22,484 --> 00:20:26,283
I got the limited edition
Smokey-Foams and a man that day.
548
00:20:26,283 --> 00:20:28,538
Oh.
I get it now.
549
00:20:28,538 --> 00:20:30,834
I forget that black people
can also be annoying.
550
00:20:30,834 --> 00:20:33,339
What'd you say?
[ Chuckles ]
551
00:20:33,339 --> 00:20:34,592
[ Indistinct conversations ]
552
00:20:34,592 --> 00:20:37,097
Hey,
what's everyone watching?
553
00:20:37,097 --> 00:20:39,142
Yo, some white boul
desked the gym!
554
00:20:39,142 --> 00:20:40,813
Check it!
Student: Whoa!
555
00:20:40,813 --> 00:20:42,942
He's wearing
the Honeydew suedes.
556
00:20:42,942 --> 00:20:44,361
[ Breathing heavily ]
557
00:20:44,361 --> 00:20:47,450
Abbott Ultimate Desking
Challenge.
558
00:20:47,450 --> 00:20:49,998
Done! Teacher style.
559
00:20:49,998 --> 00:20:51,333
Whoa, what the --
Whew!
560
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:53,588
Is that Mr. C?
561
00:20:53,588 --> 00:20:56,135
Desking's deaded.
562
00:21:02,022 --> 00:21:04,151
I can't believe
the video worked.
563
00:21:04,151 --> 00:21:06,823
Yeah. Those kids
do not want to be us.
564
00:21:06,823 --> 00:21:08,702
You know, the fact that
we are doing this well
565
00:21:08,702 --> 00:21:11,833
without clout propping us up
is some good old-fashioned
566
00:21:11,833 --> 00:21:13,628
being-pretty-darn-good-
at-our-jobs.
567
00:21:13,628 --> 00:21:15,089
Yeah. You're right.
568
00:21:15,089 --> 00:21:16,885
But imagine
what it'll be like
569
00:21:16,885 --> 00:21:19,932
when we actually do get them
to think we're cool.