1 00:00:01,584 --> 00:00:04,085 Morning. 2 00:00:04,086 --> 00:00:05,461 Happy Halloween. 3 00:00:05,462 --> 00:00:07,507 Hi, guys. Hey. 4 00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:09,632 Uh. Ice Spice? 5 00:00:09,633 --> 00:00:10,591 Like? 6 00:00:10,592 --> 00:00:13,094 Nah. Box. Mm-hmm. 7 00:00:13,095 --> 00:00:14,554 It's Halloween here at Abbott 8 00:00:14,555 --> 00:00:18,099 and some of the costumes can be a little risqué. 9 00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:20,810 So, I have a box full of backups. 10 00:00:20,811 --> 00:00:21,978 I want everyone to have a shot 11 00:00:21,979 --> 00:00:24,897 at winning the big costume contest that's later today, 12 00:00:24,898 --> 00:00:28,611 so I need to make sure they're both age and fear appropriate. 13 00:00:29,571 --> 00:00:30,695 Oh, my God. 14 00:00:30,696 --> 00:00:31,738 No, too scary. 15 00:00:31,739 --> 00:00:34,365 Good lord. Bin, please. 16 00:00:34,366 --> 00:00:36,494 Oh! Little Black Panther. 17 00:00:37,954 --> 00:00:39,495 - Oh. - Wakanda Forever! 18 00:00:39,496 --> 00:00:41,330 Maybe just Wakanda for the day. 19 00:00:41,331 --> 00:00:43,207 And maybe just keep your mask on, all right? 20 00:00:43,208 --> 00:00:44,668 Okay, who's next? 21 00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,057 Yes. 22 00:00:59,058 --> 00:01:00,308 Oh, sorry I'm a little late. 23 00:01:00,309 --> 00:01:03,394 Oh, no problem, Nina. Good to see you. 24 00:01:03,395 --> 00:01:05,605 So, uh, what do you have planned for Halloween today? 25 00:01:05,606 --> 00:01:08,858 Every year, a teacher is given the responsibility of turning the library 26 00:01:08,859 --> 00:01:12,403 into a Halloween party that all of the students can enjoy. 27 00:01:12,404 --> 00:01:15,907 And this year, Abbott is keeping it classy 28 00:01:15,908 --> 00:01:19,160 because all of the treats are up to me, 29 00:01:19,161 --> 00:01:21,331 the number one trick. 30 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:25,875 {\an8}Well, we're gonna be playing some ghostly games, 31 00:01:25,876 --> 00:01:27,460 {\an8}decorating some creepy crafts, 32 00:01:27,461 --> 00:01:30,213 {\an8}and the main event, bobbing for apples. 33 00:01:30,214 --> 00:01:32,799 {\an8}You know, I was talking to some of the parents at the PTA meeting... 34 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:34,342 {\an8}- Mm-hmm. - ...and we'd prefer if the kids 35 00:01:34,343 --> 00:01:36,177 {\an8}didn't bob for apples. It's unsanitary. 36 00:01:36,178 --> 00:01:39,097 {\an8}But she's been doing that since before I even got here. 37 00:01:39,098 --> 00:01:40,473 {\an8}It's great. 38 00:01:40,474 --> 00:01:41,557 {\an8}We'd prefer you didn't do it. 39 00:01:41,558 --> 00:01:43,476 {\an8}- But it's tradition. - So is tipping, 40 00:01:43,477 --> 00:01:45,353 {\an8}and I'd prefer we didn't do that either. 41 00:01:45,354 --> 00:01:47,271 {\an8}Well, I will take that under consideration. 42 00:01:47,272 --> 00:01:49,567 {\an8}No consideration needed. Just don't do it. 43 00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,693 {\an8}Can I offer you a cupcake? 44 00:01:52,694 --> 00:01:54,904 {\an8}Are you handing those out to the kids? 45 00:01:54,905 --> 00:01:57,033 {\an8}'Cause you can't do that. And we all know why. 46 00:01:57,992 --> 00:01:59,909 {\an8}- Do we? - I certainly don't. 47 00:01:59,910 --> 00:02:01,869 {\an8}They could have razor blades in them. 48 00:02:01,870 --> 00:02:03,790 {\an8}Or worse, nuts. 49 00:02:04,916 --> 00:02:05,917 {\an8}Happy Halloween. 50 00:02:07,168 --> 00:02:08,169 {\an8}The happiest. 51 00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:14,298 {\an8}Boy, you prank your cousin one time by putting a razor blade in a cookie, 52 00:02:14,299 --> 00:02:17,052 and all of a sudden it starts a nationwide hoax. 53 00:02:25,728 --> 00:02:27,520 {\an8}I did a creepy scratch 'cause it's Halloween. 54 00:02:27,521 --> 00:02:29,605 {\an8}Yeah, I didn't like that. But I love this. 55 00:02:29,606 --> 00:02:31,691 {\an8}Oh! Okay. Say the line. 56 00:02:31,692 --> 00:02:34,277 Bingo. Dino DNA. 57 00:02:34,278 --> 00:02:36,237 Oh, my God. Uncanny. It's like I'm watching the movie. 58 00:02:36,238 --> 00:02:37,782 - Okay, now say your line. - Oh, okay. 59 00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:42,243 I'm an ancient mosquito who drank dinosaur blood 60 00:02:42,244 --> 00:02:43,452 and now I'm trapped in amber. 61 00:02:43,453 --> 00:02:45,037 It's spot on. 62 00:02:45,038 --> 00:02:46,455 - We're such a movie couple. - I know. 63 00:02:46,456 --> 00:02:48,082 {\an8}- We love film. - Uh-huh. 64 00:02:48,083 --> 00:02:50,084 {\an8}Um... Pat Sajak! 65 00:02:50,085 --> 00:02:52,003 {\an8}Wow. You got a little wheel and everything. 66 00:02:52,004 --> 00:02:53,129 {\an8}Yeah. 67 00:02:53,130 --> 00:02:56,090 {\an8}Although, interesting choice for you, given his politics. 68 00:02:56,091 --> 00:02:58,301 {\an8}Well, I've taken a step back from Elon Musk's Internet, 69 00:02:58,302 --> 00:03:00,803 {\an8}and now it sometimes takes me weeks to find these things out. 70 00:03:00,804 --> 00:03:02,513 {\an8}So, you know, I figure if I didn't know-- 71 00:03:02,514 --> 00:03:04,390 {\an8}Yeah, you already bought the suit when you found out. 72 00:03:04,391 --> 00:03:05,433 Yeah, no returns. 73 00:03:05,434 --> 00:03:06,350 Yeah. 74 00:03:06,351 --> 00:03:07,520 Okay, now do us. 75 00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:10,438 Gregory is sexy gumballs. 76 00:03:10,439 --> 00:03:14,400 And Janine is that thing on top of an exterminator truck. 77 00:03:14,401 --> 00:03:16,277 - Yeah. - Very funny. 78 00:03:16,278 --> 00:03:17,363 It's... 79 00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,781 - You don't... - Do you really not know who we are? 80 00:03:20,782 --> 00:03:22,158 Well, give me a hint. 81 00:03:22,159 --> 00:03:23,242 I'll give you a hint. 82 00:03:23,243 --> 00:03:24,410 Okay. Chill, chill. 83 00:03:24,411 --> 00:03:26,078 It's a movie, starts with a J. 84 00:03:26,079 --> 00:03:27,163 Jumanji! 85 00:03:27,164 --> 00:03:28,539 No, that doesn't make any sense. 86 00:03:28,540 --> 00:03:29,832 Um, Jennifer's Body. 87 00:03:29,833 --> 00:03:32,126 What? N-No, Jurassic Park. 88 00:03:32,127 --> 00:03:35,087 I'm Mr. DNA and Janine is the mosquito trapped in amber. 89 00:03:35,088 --> 00:03:37,340 Oh. Oh. Yeah. 90 00:03:37,341 --> 00:03:38,591 - Yeah, I see it. - Yeah. 91 00:03:38,592 --> 00:03:41,052 The best costumes always require an explanation. 92 00:03:41,053 --> 00:03:43,723 Mmm. Well, thank you, Jacob. 93 00:03:44,807 --> 00:03:48,601 Yeah. First, we're gonna win the Abbott costume contest later today. 94 00:03:48,602 --> 00:03:51,187 Then, we're gonna win the Rubenstein's contest tonight. 95 00:03:51,188 --> 00:03:52,563 Get your broom out, brother. 96 00:03:52,564 --> 00:03:54,315 - There's gonna be a sweep. - Mm-hmm. 97 00:03:54,316 --> 00:03:56,234 A sweetie sweep. 98 00:03:56,235 --> 00:03:57,652 Hey, who wants a spin? 99 00:03:57,653 --> 00:03:59,570 - Yeah, sure. I'll go. - Uh-huh. 100 00:03:59,571 --> 00:04:01,490 Okay. Yeah. 101 00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,328 Oh. 102 00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:08,371 - Well, accurate. Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 103 00:04:08,372 --> 00:04:09,624 That was fun. 104 00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,208 Who you supposed to be? 105 00:04:12,209 --> 00:04:14,043 I kill vampires and I hate taxes. 106 00:04:14,044 --> 00:04:16,003 Oh, Blade. 107 00:04:16,004 --> 00:04:18,714 - What about you, Mr. Johnson? - Give you a hint. 108 00:04:18,715 --> 00:04:21,926 I can ball out, boy, but I'd rather be in Fall Out Boy. 109 00:04:21,927 --> 00:04:24,887 He's emo Jimmy Butler, duh. 110 00:04:24,888 --> 00:04:26,305 There's not a costume I don't get. 111 00:04:26,306 --> 00:04:29,018 Oh, okay. Yeah, I... I get it. 112 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:31,938 It hurts when you lie, Jacob. 113 00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:38,317 Some days I wonder if anyone will ever understand me. 114 00:04:38,318 --> 00:04:40,903 - Oh. - Would anyone care for a tasty cupcake... 115 00:04:40,904 --> 00:04:42,029 - Yes. - ...since apparently, 116 00:04:42,030 --> 00:04:44,240 I cannot give them to my students anymore. 117 00:04:44,241 --> 00:04:47,827 Yeah, can't have that. Might have razor blades in 'em. 118 00:04:47,828 --> 00:04:48,953 Then why are you taking one? 119 00:04:48,954 --> 00:04:50,997 Well, I know you didn't put razor blades in them. 120 00:04:50,998 --> 00:04:52,498 You ain't got that dog in you. 121 00:04:52,499 --> 00:04:54,292 Then why would you say they might? 122 00:04:54,293 --> 00:04:56,794 Since when do my cupcakes have razor blades in them? 123 00:04:56,795 --> 00:04:59,797 Since when can't kids bob for apples because it's unsanitary? 124 00:04:59,798 --> 00:05:01,759 Oh, that I get. It's objectively gross. 125 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:05,261 Jacob, you are Pat Sajak. 126 00:05:05,262 --> 00:05:07,888 Wheel of Fortune is an institution. 127 00:05:07,889 --> 00:05:11,976 You above all should understand the importance of tradition. 128 00:05:11,977 --> 00:05:16,647 My students have bobbed for apples since I started here at Abbott, 129 00:05:16,648 --> 00:05:19,734 and not one time has anyone reported sick. 130 00:05:19,735 --> 00:05:21,986 And now I don't have a main event for the library. 131 00:05:21,987 --> 00:05:23,946 Well, you gotta figure out how to fill that time. 132 00:05:23,947 --> 00:05:25,656 - Hmm. - Wait, I got it. 133 00:05:25,657 --> 00:05:28,075 You could carve pumpkins and call them "Black-o'-lanterns". 134 00:05:28,076 --> 00:05:30,870 Okay, I won't comment on the name, but that's a bad idea. 135 00:05:30,871 --> 00:05:33,622 What about ghost stories? Roz, you could do the voices. 136 00:05:33,623 --> 00:05:36,042 Oh, I am not reading for three hours straight. 137 00:05:36,043 --> 00:05:38,586 - Just like the cat, lazy. - Lazy. 138 00:05:38,587 --> 00:05:43,215 Now, you all, it's not as if Roz could do that many voices anyway. 139 00:05:43,216 --> 00:05:46,177 Okay fine, I will do it. 140 00:05:46,178 --> 00:05:48,596 Wait. 141 00:05:48,597 --> 00:05:50,765 I'm waiting for Janine so we can make our big entrance. 142 00:05:50,766 --> 00:05:52,224 It is a couple's costume after all. 143 00:05:52,225 --> 00:05:55,146 - Ready. [exhales sharply] Ready. - Ready. 144 00:05:57,023 --> 00:06:00,026 Okay. Okay, don't tell me, I'm eight for eight today. I'll get it. 145 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:01,861 You're... 146 00:06:02,612 --> 00:06:04,487 You are, um... 147 00:06:04,488 --> 00:06:07,490 teachers in crappy costumes. I don't... 148 00:06:07,491 --> 00:06:09,367 Oh. You know what? 149 00:06:09,368 --> 00:06:12,244 We are standing on the wrong side of each other, we talked about this. 150 00:06:12,245 --> 00:06:13,873 - Hold, please. - Sorry. 151 00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:16,874 Mosquito in amber and Mr. DNA. 152 00:06:16,875 --> 00:06:18,167 - From Jurassic Park. - Thank you. 153 00:06:18,168 --> 00:06:19,752 - Yeah, I got it earlier in one guess. - Yay. 154 00:06:19,753 --> 00:06:23,339 Oh, babies, this is, uh, terrible. 155 00:06:23,340 --> 00:06:25,758 What? No, it is not. 156 00:06:25,759 --> 00:06:27,385 I mean, come on, Ava get's it, so... 157 00:06:27,386 --> 00:06:29,095 Yeah, I get it. I didn't say it was good. 158 00:06:29,096 --> 00:06:31,555 I know what rye bread is. Still nasty. 159 00:06:31,556 --> 00:06:33,682 Yeah. I mean, it doesn't even make sense as a concept. 160 00:06:33,683 --> 00:06:35,351 Oh, that's 'cause you don't know the movie. 161 00:06:35,352 --> 00:06:36,685 - Yeah. - Oh, I'm sorry. 162 00:06:36,686 --> 00:06:38,729 What don't I know about the oldest movie in history 163 00:06:38,730 --> 00:06:41,315 to surpass a billion dollars in ticket sales? 164 00:06:41,316 --> 00:06:45,236 These [bleeps] kids think they're the only ones that know anything about movies. 165 00:06:45,237 --> 00:06:48,030 You guys, I'm sorry but you don't know what you talking about. 166 00:06:48,031 --> 00:06:50,449 I mean, whose couple's costume is touching ours? 167 00:06:50,450 --> 00:06:52,743 - Mine. - You are a single guinea pig. 168 00:06:52,744 --> 00:06:54,036 Mm-hmm. 169 00:06:54,037 --> 00:06:57,373 I say this not as a hater, but as a connoisseur of culture... 170 00:06:57,374 --> 00:06:59,083 When did you start coming in the lounge? 171 00:06:59,084 --> 00:07:01,961 ...the two of you don't stand a chance in that costume contest. 172 00:07:01,962 --> 00:07:05,005 Well, I'll say it as a hater, "haterly," y'all gonna lose. 173 00:07:05,006 --> 00:07:09,802 But you are going to do it being so very yourselves, 174 00:07:09,803 --> 00:07:10,928 and that's beautiful. 175 00:07:10,929 --> 00:07:13,139 - Yeah, this costume is very on-brand. - Mm-hmm. 176 00:07:13,140 --> 00:07:14,640 And what does that mean? 177 00:07:14,641 --> 00:07:16,851 She means you a headass couple doing headass things. 178 00:07:16,852 --> 00:07:18,144 - Hmm. - I'm sorry, headass? 179 00:07:18,145 --> 00:07:21,063 Look, in this scenario, I think it refers to two lovers 180 00:07:21,064 --> 00:07:24,984 who are in their own slightly delusional, somewhat cheesy, bubble. 181 00:07:24,985 --> 00:07:27,695 You know, unable to see how the outside world is perceiving them. 182 00:07:27,696 --> 00:07:29,113 Stop explaining slang. 183 00:07:29,114 --> 00:07:31,740 And I know what it means, Jacob. And we're not it at all, so... 184 00:07:31,741 --> 00:07:35,661 Oh, I disagree, Mr. Headass and headass trapped in amber. 185 00:07:35,662 --> 00:07:38,956 Oh, I'm see a heap of "headassery". 186 00:07:38,957 --> 00:07:42,209 Yeah, it's like you're in your own little headass world thinking you're so cute. 187 00:07:42,210 --> 00:07:43,294 - Hey, we are cute. - Hmm. 188 00:07:43,295 --> 00:07:44,837 Cutest little headasses I ever saw. 189 00:07:44,838 --> 00:07:46,589 - We are not headass. - Yeah? 190 00:07:46,590 --> 00:07:47,675 Then what's this? 191 00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:54,805 Let me see. Let me see. Show me. Show me. Perfect. 192 00:07:54,806 --> 00:07:56,767 Oh, my God. 193 00:07:57,351 --> 00:08:00,269 Yes, welcome, welcome, all. Come on in. 194 00:08:00,270 --> 00:08:03,564 So you guys decided to still go with the bad costumes? 195 00:08:03,565 --> 00:08:04,732 They're not bad. 196 00:08:04,733 --> 00:08:06,400 Oh, I'm sorry. Headass. 197 00:08:06,401 --> 00:08:08,527 So, a headass costume would be like... 198 00:08:08,528 --> 00:08:09,820 - PB and J. - Yes. 199 00:08:09,821 --> 00:08:11,280 - Or salt and pepper. - Mm-hmm. 200 00:08:11,281 --> 00:08:13,240 - Or ketchup and mustard. - Yeah. 201 00:08:13,241 --> 00:08:15,409 - Our costumes are thoughtful. Highbrow. - Whip-smart. 202 00:08:15,410 --> 00:08:16,496 Headass. 203 00:08:19,248 --> 00:08:22,333 And he heard a voice that said, 204 00:08:22,334 --> 00:08:26,255 "Where is my golden arm?" 205 00:08:27,381 --> 00:08:28,799 "You've got it!" 206 00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:33,219 - Was that supposed to be scary? - Do Skibidi Toilet next. 207 00:08:33,220 --> 00:08:36,430 I got a ghost story so scary it will make your toenails curl. 208 00:08:36,431 --> 00:08:37,767 Okay. 209 00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:40,686 Vietnam, 1971. 210 00:08:42,146 --> 00:08:43,479 I was on vacation-- 211 00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:44,772 Stop, Mr. Johnson. 212 00:08:44,773 --> 00:08:46,108 This isn't working. 213 00:08:47,735 --> 00:08:49,195 My suffering continues. 214 00:08:50,988 --> 00:08:54,992 Um, I'm all out of stories and we've got an hour and a half to kill. 215 00:09:01,123 --> 00:09:02,208 Attention, everyone. 216 00:09:03,334 --> 00:09:04,667 It's time to pivot. 217 00:09:04,668 --> 00:09:06,168 I don't care what those parents say. 218 00:09:06,169 --> 00:09:07,836 They are not here in the trenches. 219 00:09:07,837 --> 00:09:10,091 So we are bobbing for apples. 220 00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:13,008 Hey. What are y'all dressed as? 221 00:09:13,009 --> 00:09:14,093 Oh. 222 00:09:14,094 --> 00:09:16,804 Well, I am the mosquito in amber from Jurassic Park. 223 00:09:16,805 --> 00:09:17,805 And I'm Mr. DNA. 224 00:09:17,806 --> 00:09:18,931 What is that? 225 00:09:18,932 --> 00:09:21,517 A DNA strand is the blueprint to all living creatures. 226 00:09:21,518 --> 00:09:22,601 You know, from the movie. 227 00:09:22,602 --> 00:09:25,354 Why aren't you dinosaurs? 228 00:09:25,355 --> 00:09:29,984 Well, because the mosquito and Mr. DNA are the bedrock of the film. 229 00:09:29,985 --> 00:09:32,154 You could've just been dinosaurs. 230 00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:34,863 It's a valid point. 231 00:09:34,864 --> 00:09:37,950 I'm not gonna lie, I'm starting to think we're not gonna win later. 232 00:09:37,951 --> 00:09:40,035 I mean, the teachers not getting it is one thing, 233 00:09:40,036 --> 00:09:42,329 but the kids don't seem to get it either, so... 234 00:09:42,330 --> 00:09:44,415 Hey, do not let that kid shake your confidence, okay? 235 00:09:44,416 --> 00:09:45,499 Okay. Okay. 236 00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:47,126 Have you seen his drawings? 237 00:09:47,127 --> 00:09:48,335 - They're ass. - They are. 238 00:09:48,336 --> 00:09:50,838 They're ass. They're really bad. 239 00:09:50,839 --> 00:09:54,383 He doesn't know how to shade or stay in the lines or crosshatch. 240 00:09:54,384 --> 00:09:56,385 - What does he know about art and culture? - You're right. 241 00:09:56,386 --> 00:09:57,720 - Jerk. - Nothing. 242 00:09:57,721 --> 00:10:01,265 Now it is time to bob for apples. 243 00:10:01,266 --> 00:10:03,017 You go first. 244 00:10:03,018 --> 00:10:04,770 There ya go. 245 00:10:06,522 --> 00:10:09,442 Mrs. Howard, our parents said we can't do that. 246 00:10:10,484 --> 00:10:12,860 I understand. 247 00:10:12,861 --> 00:10:17,072 And that is why we are not going to tell any of our parents. 248 00:10:17,073 --> 00:10:19,575 After all, it's Halloween. 249 00:10:19,576 --> 00:10:22,494 A day for deceit. 250 00:10:22,495 --> 00:10:25,914 So... 251 00:10:25,915 --> 00:10:27,499 Actually, that was just an excuse. 252 00:10:27,500 --> 00:10:28,751 I don't wanna do it. 253 00:10:28,752 --> 00:10:30,338 Okay, fine. Sit it out. 254 00:10:31,005 --> 00:10:32,254 More apples for the rest of us. 255 00:10:32,255 --> 00:10:34,882 - I don't want to either. - Wait. Why not? 256 00:10:34,883 --> 00:10:38,427 Because the water goes up my nose and it's gross and it's germy. 257 00:10:38,428 --> 00:10:40,220 And we all just had ringworm. 258 00:10:40,221 --> 00:10:42,056 Come on, this is gonna be fun. 259 00:10:42,057 --> 00:10:43,474 It's a tradition. 260 00:10:43,475 --> 00:10:47,478 My students have been doing this since when I first started teaching. 261 00:10:47,479 --> 00:10:49,396 Yeah, but that was, like, a thousand years ago. 262 00:10:49,397 --> 00:10:52,650 Mr. Gregory's class did it last year and they had a blast. 263 00:10:52,651 --> 00:10:54,276 Go ahead, tell them how much fun it was. 264 00:10:54,277 --> 00:10:58,739 I didn't say anything last year, but I think it's nasty. 265 00:10:58,740 --> 00:11:01,825 - Okay, you're dressed as a toilet, kid. - That should tell you how gross it is. 266 00:11:01,826 --> 00:11:02,951 Okay, fine. 267 00:11:02,952 --> 00:11:06,538 I will show you just how much fun it can be. 268 00:11:06,539 --> 00:11:08,165 - Wow. - Oh, she's going in. 269 00:11:08,166 --> 00:11:09,541 Yeah! 270 00:11:09,542 --> 00:11:11,293 How do you like them apples? 271 00:11:11,294 --> 00:11:14,214 Don't come back up till you get all of 'em, Barb! 272 00:11:17,426 --> 00:11:20,219 See how much fun this is, kids? 273 00:11:20,220 --> 00:11:22,596 I'm gonna get one the next time. 274 00:11:22,597 --> 00:11:24,306 - Yeah. - Oh, sure. 275 00:11:24,307 --> 00:11:28,479 Let's just splash water everywhere in the only carpeted room in the school. 276 00:11:29,772 --> 00:11:30,979 What is Melissa doing? 277 00:11:30,980 --> 00:11:32,815 Hey. Don't worry about that, okay? 278 00:11:32,816 --> 00:11:34,608 - It's go time. - Okay. How do I look? 279 00:11:34,609 --> 00:11:36,860 - Like we 'bout to win a costume contest. - Right? 280 00:11:36,861 --> 00:11:38,445 It's time for the pairs. 281 00:11:38,446 --> 00:11:40,950 All my dynamic duos, come on up. 282 00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:43,575 Corn and scarecrow. 283 00:11:43,576 --> 00:11:46,662 Mr. DNA and mosquito trapped in amber. 284 00:11:46,663 --> 00:11:48,914 And... [stammers] Miss Schemmenti. 285 00:11:48,915 --> 00:11:51,417 Miss Schemmenti, where's your partner? 286 00:11:51,418 --> 00:11:53,502 I'm so glad you asked that, Andrew. 287 00:11:53,503 --> 00:11:57,299 Presenting Sweet Cheeks and... 288 00:11:58,008 --> 00:12:00,301 Miss Schemmenti! 289 00:12:03,597 --> 00:12:04,682 Oh, my God. 290 00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:06,850 I don't know who's who. 291 00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:09,810 - It's gimmicky. - Yeah. I mean, it's derivative. 292 00:12:09,811 --> 00:12:11,395 - I've definitely seen it before. - Right? 293 00:12:11,396 --> 00:12:12,896 Where did she get that wig? 294 00:12:12,897 --> 00:12:16,900 And the winner is, by unanimous decision, without a doubt: 295 00:12:16,901 --> 00:12:19,653 Miss Schemmenti and Sweet Cheeks. 296 00:12:19,654 --> 00:12:20,739 Excuse me? 297 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:27,369 Oh, my God. Thank you so much. 298 00:12:27,370 --> 00:12:30,622 I took me 14 hours to sew this little pleather jacket. 299 00:12:30,623 --> 00:12:33,834 And if we had lost, I would've been in a really dark place. 300 00:12:33,835 --> 00:12:35,419 So thank you. 301 00:12:35,420 --> 00:12:37,379 Thanks so much, y'all. 302 00:12:37,380 --> 00:12:40,174 Okay, but we would've gotten second, right? 303 00:12:40,175 --> 00:12:41,258 No you wouldn't have. 304 00:12:41,259 --> 00:12:43,635 The scarecrow and the corn had it in the bag. 305 00:12:43,636 --> 00:12:46,388 What can we say? It lacks a certain je ne sais quoi. 306 00:12:46,389 --> 00:12:47,806 Oh yeah, says the goat. 307 00:12:47,807 --> 00:12:51,685 That's right, the GOAT. Muhammad Ali. 308 00:12:51,686 --> 00:12:52,772 Oh. 309 00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:57,566 - That's really good. Very good. - Yeah, that's very good, Andrew. 310 00:12:57,567 --> 00:12:59,067 That's very creative. 311 00:12:59,068 --> 00:13:04,031 Our next category is unpopular teachers that insisted on participating anyway. 312 00:13:04,032 --> 00:13:06,160 We've got... 313 00:13:07,536 --> 00:13:08,537 Y'all see 'em. 314 00:13:09,413 --> 00:13:10,996 Mr. Hill, who are you supposed to be? 315 00:13:10,997 --> 00:13:13,290 Oh, I'm, uh, I'm-I'm Pat Sajak. 316 00:13:13,291 --> 00:13:14,666 Who's that? 317 00:13:14,667 --> 00:13:16,502 Yeah, you guys probably don't know him. It's... It's fine. 318 00:13:16,503 --> 00:13:18,420 I will take my L expeditiously. 319 00:13:18,421 --> 00:13:20,297 Of course they know him. 320 00:13:20,298 --> 00:13:21,715 The man is an icon. 321 00:13:21,716 --> 00:13:22,966 Okay, come on. 322 00:13:22,967 --> 00:13:27,888 Show of hands, who knows Mr. Patrick Sajak? 323 00:13:27,889 --> 00:13:29,723 Barb, they don't know him. 324 00:13:29,724 --> 00:13:31,644 We just need to jog their memory. 325 00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:34,686 - Why is she standing up? - No idea. 326 00:13:34,687 --> 00:13:36,104 Come on, y'all. 327 00:13:36,105 --> 00:13:41,860 Pulling up the TV tray with a piping hot potpie to watch the wheel. 328 00:13:41,861 --> 00:13:44,196 It's an American tradition. 329 00:13:44,197 --> 00:13:45,948 Like bobbing for apples. 330 00:13:45,949 --> 00:13:47,157 Spin the wheel, Jacob. 331 00:13:47,158 --> 00:13:49,034 Yep. 332 00:13:49,035 --> 00:13:50,621 Harder. 333 00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:55,332 Oh, kids. You don't know this? 334 00:13:55,333 --> 00:13:57,751 It's probably because he doesn't even host Wheel of Fortune anymore. 335 00:13:57,752 --> 00:14:00,337 - What you talking about, boy? - Well, he's retired. 336 00:14:00,338 --> 00:14:03,507 Forty-one years, 8000 'sodes. He had a good run. 337 00:14:03,508 --> 00:14:06,510 What are they gonna do without him, huh? Spin the wheel themselves? 338 00:14:06,511 --> 00:14:07,719 - Well, they always, uh-- - Jacob, 339 00:14:07,720 --> 00:14:09,680 leave the stage and come back so that you can receive 340 00:14:09,681 --> 00:14:12,518 the level of applause and appreciation that you deserve. 341 00:14:13,143 --> 00:14:14,226 - Okay. - Mm-hmm. 342 00:14:14,227 --> 00:14:16,854 Barb, hey, just let this go and then later we'll get a drink-- 343 00:14:16,855 --> 00:14:18,564 - I do not need a drink, Melissa. - Okay. 344 00:14:18,565 --> 00:14:23,485 I need these children to recognize a cultural icon. 345 00:14:23,486 --> 00:14:25,863 Yes! 346 00:14:25,864 --> 00:14:27,698 - Yeah. - Yeah. 347 00:14:27,699 --> 00:14:32,494 I said clap for Pat Sajak or Halloween is canceled! 348 00:14:32,495 --> 00:14:33,580 Oh. 349 00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:39,670 Oh... 350 00:14:40,629 --> 00:14:42,337 - Maybe I do need a drink. - Yes. 351 00:14:42,338 --> 00:14:43,549 I'm sorry. 352 00:14:51,432 --> 00:14:52,723 Hey. 353 00:14:52,724 --> 00:14:54,975 This costume is itchy. My last costume wasn't itchy. 354 00:14:54,976 --> 00:14:56,768 I have no access to my pockets. 355 00:14:56,769 --> 00:15:01,565 So, we realized that our original costumes were going over people's heads. 356 00:15:01,566 --> 00:15:02,649 - Too highbrow. - Yeah. 357 00:15:02,650 --> 00:15:05,944 So we stopped at Spirit Halloween and picked up something else. 358 00:15:05,945 --> 00:15:08,447 With these costumes, which are actually headass... 359 00:15:08,448 --> 00:15:09,656 - Mm-hmm. - ...we have a chance of winning. 360 00:15:09,657 --> 00:15:11,283 - Which we wanna do. - Yeah. 361 00:15:11,284 --> 00:15:13,160 'Cause we want people to look at us and go, 362 00:15:13,161 --> 00:15:14,661 "They go good together." 363 00:15:14,662 --> 00:15:16,246 'Cause we do go good together. 364 00:15:16,247 --> 00:15:19,291 Like peanut butter and jelly. 365 00:15:19,292 --> 00:15:20,543 GE and J. 366 00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:25,088 Oh! Peanut butter! Jelly! 367 00:15:25,089 --> 00:15:26,632 Nom, nom, nom. 368 00:15:26,633 --> 00:15:27,841 Thank you. 369 00:15:27,842 --> 00:15:29,801 I'm not even a protein. I'm basically just candy. 370 00:15:29,802 --> 00:15:30,928 I told you we could switch. 371 00:15:30,929 --> 00:15:32,596 - No, it's fine. It's fine. - All right. 372 00:15:32,597 --> 00:15:33,847 How do I get to my phone? 373 00:15:33,848 --> 00:15:36,600 I don't know why not being able to bob for apples 374 00:15:36,601 --> 00:15:37,851 bothered me so much, 375 00:15:37,852 --> 00:15:39,561 but it really did. 376 00:15:39,562 --> 00:15:41,231 I don't know. I... 377 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:43,106 I just don't know. 378 00:15:43,107 --> 00:15:45,027 Barb, you lost a tradition. 379 00:15:45,694 --> 00:15:46,944 Yeah, that's right. 380 00:15:46,945 --> 00:15:49,363 Okay, so my family used to barbecue on the lawn 381 00:15:49,364 --> 00:15:51,448 at the old Coal and Iron Police headquarters, 382 00:15:51,449 --> 00:15:54,618 and then one year a burning coal 383 00:15:54,619 --> 00:15:58,165 mysteriously found its way into the building and it burned down. 384 00:15:58,916 --> 00:16:02,252 But the next year, we found a new site to desecrate. 385 00:16:03,045 --> 00:16:04,336 Because that's what you do. 386 00:16:04,337 --> 00:16:07,339 Yeah, but I've been bobbing since before I can remember. 387 00:16:07,340 --> 00:16:09,716 I was so good at it. 388 00:16:09,717 --> 00:16:11,552 They used to call me Bobra. 389 00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:15,015 I'm not gonna forget this. 390 00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:19,226 The day I stop doing something I don't even remember starting. 391 00:16:19,227 --> 00:16:22,646 Well, tonight we'll just start a new tradition, okay? 392 00:16:22,647 --> 00:16:24,400 'Cause we keep on pushing. 393 00:16:25,192 --> 00:16:26,735 We adjust. 394 00:16:27,486 --> 00:16:28,735 Yeah. 395 00:16:28,736 --> 00:16:30,990 'Cause things never stop changing. 396 00:16:34,618 --> 00:16:36,284 Pat Sajak, reporting for duty. 397 00:16:36,285 --> 00:16:37,577 Pat Sajak? 398 00:16:37,578 --> 00:16:38,996 - Pat Sajak. - Did you know-- 399 00:16:38,997 --> 00:16:40,247 Yeah, I-I know. I know. 400 00:16:40,248 --> 00:16:41,915 I know now, okay? 401 00:16:41,916 --> 00:16:44,292 But not until after I made the wheel. 402 00:16:44,293 --> 00:16:46,628 And what am I supposed to do with this thing? Just throw it out? 403 00:16:46,629 --> 00:16:47,840 Look at the craftsmanship. 404 00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:54,219 - Hi. Uh, peanut butter. - And jelly. 405 00:16:54,220 --> 00:16:55,929 Peanut butter, your tag's still on. 406 00:16:55,930 --> 00:16:57,016 Really? 407 00:16:58,142 --> 00:16:59,143 I don't... Where? 408 00:16:59,727 --> 00:17:01,351 - I don't see it. Where is it? - Oh, wait. Spin around. Okay. 409 00:17:01,352 --> 00:17:02,438 Hold on. 410 00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:05,107 Wait, wait. Don't pop it. 411 00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:07,818 Gregory, look at that couple's costume. 412 00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:10,861 Ash Wednesday. 413 00:17:10,862 --> 00:17:12,614 That's headass. 414 00:17:13,532 --> 00:17:14,533 It is. 415 00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:18,869 Uh, we'd like to change our submission, please. 416 00:17:18,870 --> 00:17:20,203 Uh, hey. What are you doing? 417 00:17:20,204 --> 00:17:21,455 Look, look, look, look. 418 00:17:21,456 --> 00:17:23,331 We need to go back to our original costumes. 419 00:17:23,332 --> 00:17:24,249 But no one will get it. 420 00:17:24,250 --> 00:17:26,835 We'll get it, and that's all that matters. 421 00:17:26,836 --> 00:17:30,839 Look, as long as we are in our own bubble together, 422 00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:32,468 no one could ever pop it. 423 00:17:36,638 --> 00:17:38,055 So, can we change our submission? 424 00:17:38,056 --> 00:17:39,389 Imagine if I said no. 425 00:17:39,390 --> 00:17:41,141 I'm gonna be Mr. DNA. 426 00:17:41,142 --> 00:17:43,477 And I am gonna be a mosquito trapped in amber. 427 00:17:43,478 --> 00:17:44,519 Whatever. 428 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:45,937 - You write it down? - Did you write it down? 429 00:17:45,938 --> 00:17:47,566 Yeah. No... I'm writing it. 430 00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:49,485 Okay. 431 00:17:50,486 --> 00:17:53,361 All right, who wants to bob for apple schnapps? 432 00:17:53,362 --> 00:17:55,781 Yeah! Two right here, right here, right here. 433 00:17:55,782 --> 00:17:57,365 Okay, there you go. Thanks, sweetheart. 434 00:17:57,366 --> 00:17:59,244 Okay, come on, Bobra, let's see what you got. 435 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:08,794 Yeah... Oh, boo. 436 00:18:08,795 --> 00:18:11,171 Are we still doing nurse's costumes? 437 00:18:11,172 --> 00:18:13,965 C'mon, that's not even a sexy one. 438 00:18:13,966 --> 00:18:16,635 Melissa, I think that person is an actual nurse. 439 00:18:16,636 --> 00:18:18,055 I said what I said. 440 00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:21,431 See, this could be our new tradition. 441 00:18:21,432 --> 00:18:22,766 Two more. 442 00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:25,727 The next contestants are... 443 00:18:25,728 --> 00:18:28,021 What... Uh-- 444 00:18:28,022 --> 00:18:29,272 Oh, my God, I don't even know. 445 00:18:29,273 --> 00:18:31,274 - I knew he wasn't gonna write it down. - It's fine... I know. 446 00:18:31,275 --> 00:18:32,567 - Just go, just go. - Why didn't he write it down? 447 00:18:32,568 --> 00:18:34,694 - Look at this. - They'll know. They'll know. 448 00:18:34,695 --> 00:18:37,030 Hey. Hi, every... Oh. 449 00:18:37,031 --> 00:18:38,450 I'm so sorry. Yeah. 450 00:18:39,243 --> 00:18:43,247 You might recognize us from Steven Spielberg's masterpiece, 451 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,124 Jurassic Park. 452 00:18:47,501 --> 00:18:52,045 I'm the incredibly clever way of providing exposition, Mr. DNA. 453 00:18:52,046 --> 00:18:53,380 He looks just like it. 454 00:18:53,381 --> 00:18:55,298 And I... 455 00:18:55,299 --> 00:18:59,761 I am a riveting plot device, the mosquito trapped in amber. 456 00:18:59,762 --> 00:19:00,762 Uh-huh. 457 00:19:00,763 --> 00:19:02,307 Oh. Okay. 458 00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:05,600 Well I love it! 459 00:19:05,601 --> 00:19:06,893 Hear, hear! 460 00:19:06,894 --> 00:19:07,978 Innovative. 461 00:19:07,979 --> 00:19:09,271 Would you cut it out? 462 00:19:09,272 --> 00:19:10,814 Thank you, persons we don't know. 463 00:19:10,815 --> 00:19:12,984 Okay, let's hear it for the effort. 464 00:19:16,071 --> 00:19:17,281 Okay, who's next? 465 00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:22,200 Wait a minute. 466 00:19:22,201 --> 00:19:23,535 Whoa-ho-ho-ho! 467 00:19:23,536 --> 00:19:27,332 Next up, we have Grace Jones with a sword 468 00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:30,626 I'm Blade, bitch. 469 00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:43,889 Who wants to bob for more shots, guys? 470 00:19:43,890 --> 00:19:45,307 Oh, yes. Right here. 471 00:19:45,308 --> 00:19:46,433 We've already paid for 'em. 472 00:19:46,434 --> 00:19:48,476 You take one. Get you one, Barbara. 473 00:19:48,477 --> 00:19:49,519 You know, I'm gonna head out. 474 00:19:49,520 --> 00:19:51,229 - What? Are you okay? - Yeah. 475 00:19:51,230 --> 00:19:53,442 This has been fun. I'm just a little tired. 476 00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:55,692 Do you need me to walk you to your car? 477 00:19:55,693 --> 00:19:57,777 This sword only looks fake. 478 00:19:57,778 --> 00:19:59,821 - Thank you, I'll be fine. - Okay. 479 00:19:59,822 --> 00:20:01,198 Y'all get home safe now. 480 00:20:01,199 --> 00:20:02,284 We will. 481 00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,576 Oh, my God. 482 00:20:04,577 --> 00:20:05,660 Sweet Cheeks. 483 00:20:05,661 --> 00:20:07,204 Look for Sweet Cheeks. Look for him. 484 00:20:07,205 --> 00:20:10,874 Every... Hey, everybody look for a guinea pig who looks like me but little. 485 00:20:10,875 --> 00:20:12,000 Can you see anything? 486 00:20:12,001 --> 00:20:13,585 No. Wait a minute. 487 00:20:13,586 --> 00:20:14,794 Never mind. Didn't bring him. 488 00:20:14,795 --> 00:20:15,879 As you were. 489 00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:18,006 I didn't bring him! 490 00:20:18,007 --> 00:20:19,800 To Sweet Cheeks! 491 00:20:21,470 --> 00:20:23,762 It certainly was a different Halloween for me. 492 00:20:23,763 --> 00:20:25,349 Tried a few new things. 493 00:20:25,974 --> 00:20:28,391 That's the interesting thing about traditions. 494 00:20:28,392 --> 00:20:32,103 I mean, the first time you do them, it's just something you're testing out. 495 00:20:32,104 --> 00:20:35,899 There's something so beautiful about unwittingly discovering things 496 00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:39,321 that will become so important to you and those you hold dear. 497 00:20:40,614 --> 00:20:43,281 On the bright side, I heard that Pat Sajak 498 00:20:43,282 --> 00:20:46,451 is gonna be hosting Celebrity Wheel of Fortune. 499 00:20:46,452 --> 00:20:50,082 And, well, maybe I can replace Vanna White. 500 00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:52,876 What do you think? 501 00:20:53,460 --> 00:20:56,129 Yeah, but you a ghost every year. 502 00:20:57,965 --> 00:21:00,259 Oh. Daywalker. 503 00:21:05,138 --> 00:21:07,474 {\an8}Bloodsuckers. 504 00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:18,025 {\an8}Ya! 505 00:21:19,987 --> 00:21:21,405 {\an8}All right, see y'all at school tomorrow. 506 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:24,366 {\an8}Ha!