- I reached out to a few of my friends,
and I told them that we were going to go
on a couple's retreat.
But this is not just a vacation.
- This is Lakara.
She is a medium. - Hi, everybody.
- Uh-oh.
- I see, like, something is coming together.
Is it babies?
- The relationship is not as sexual as it started.
What's really going on with that?
- In the beginning, that frustrated me.
I run on a schedule.
- Spontaneity is a big part of the foreplay,
so I say let's start there.
- What's up, mother suckers? all: Whoo!
- Your husband with the big-ass forehead right there.
[laughter]
- I got a lot of other things that's big, so
I didn't get offended by it.
- I'm telling you, there's [bleep] out there
that's trying to [bleep] my wife.
- This [bleep] out there trying to [bleep] our wives.
That's normal.
Did you get to say anything about what you doing
with the lingerie in your purse?
- Do you think I should address that?
I should, huh? - Where y'all at,
I would leave it alone. - I'ma ask her.
- No, don't do that. - I gotta ask her.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Look at her. Looking good.
- ♪ Live in LA now, hard with you, I'm ♪
♪ Missin' you miles away ♪
- So let's get to these cards.
- Name the top five things you love about me.
- I love the fact you work and get your own money.
I love the fact that you're a great mom to my kids.
- Smart, beautiful, and know how to twerk.
- And I know how to twerk?
[both laughing]
- ♪ We belong together ♪ - Your facial expressions.
Just like that.
- 'Cause I like that... what did I say first?
- Your really good heart.
Your patience...now.
- Name the top five things you love about me.
- ♪ We belong together ♪
♪ And you know it ♪
- Nice body. How many is that?
- Keep it coming.
- I love that you're a good mom,
that you strong,
that you don't stand for [bleep], you know, you know?
- I don't stand for [bleep]. - You don't--
I mean, you don't stand for no bull[bleep].
You know what I'm saying? That's what I meant to say.
- I loved earlier, my birthday,
when you allowed me to have a foursome.
- Really? - Yes.
♪ ♪
- ♪ We belong together ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
- Mike just went hiking with the boys.
I'm hoping that he doesn't share a lot
of our private life with them.
Hoping that he can keep this pregnancy a secret
until we can make sure
that this is something that we both want.
- Ray's still sleeping right now,
but last night was a little weird.
We had a lot to drink, because--
- This toast is for everybody out there
trying to be with our wives and take 'em from us.
Nah. We ain't having that.
- I don't know where that speech was going.
I think we were all a little confused.
[soft music]
- ♪ Baby, when you say my name ♪
♪ Sit back, sip some chardonnay ♪
♪ That's just how I'm feeling, bae ♪
♪ When you touch me... ♪
- You [bleep]s know where we going?
- Ah, [bleep]. Damn.
- Right here or back there?
- The [bleep]?
[laughter]
- You guys want to get the guys some drinks?
- Yeah. - It's just a bunch
of branches stuck in my leg.
I'll be all right. This ain't nothing new to him.
[laughter]
- ♪ Will you ride with me ♪
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
- I am really excited about what we have planned for today.
I know they've been a little overwhelmed,
so I gave AJ the day off.
And I just think the men need a little break.
- Can I do one Malibu bay breeze,
and then a margarita?
- Do you know your guys' favorite drink?
- I just know let's just keep the Hennessy shots away.
[laughter]
- Is that what it was last night?
- Yes. - Oh, that's what it was.
- Baby, he was the hostess with the mostest last night.
- He was.
- This toast--this toast...
you know, whether the joke's on you,
whether the joke's on me...
It's for all my G's out there.
You know what I'm saying? - Okay, Ray J, thank you.
- No, he was the happiest I've seen him.
- And you looked so happy too. That was so cute.
- I know, you guys looked so happy last night.
- I gotta get you back for last night, man.
You did your thing too good.
- That was a good laugh.
- How did you get into comedy?
- Man-- - Are you born with this gift?
- Nah, just that every comedian is born with a dark side.
It's something that runs through the makeup
to become a comedian.
- All right. - What's your dark side?
- With my dark jokes, when I first came to America,
at age 13, 14, you know how the Americans be.
Y'all are mean.
Y'all just make fun of everybody,
and I came here in the Michael Jackson era,
Prince era, light-skinned era,
- Hmm. - Man, I went through hell.
I heard all the dark-skinned jokes.
You guys told me I looked like under the bed.
Dark as hell. [laughter]
- That [bleep] funny, though. - They told me I look like
I had no bright ideas.
[laughter]
I didn't get coochie till--
my first coochie was, like, at 18 years old.
Then I didn't see much again, till, like, the movie
"Next Friday" came out.
I missed out on a lot of coochie, boy.
While y'all [bleep] was selling dope and [bleep] them bitches,
I was beating my [bleep] for many years.
- So that's why you don't want to do that no more?
- That's why the side bitches are making up
for all the bitches I didn't have.
- So once that goes, that's gonna get played down and--
- Basically, you living your second childhood years, right?
- I mean, yes.
- So you think you could ever be faithful?
- I mean, so, yeah. I could be.
Once, you know, once that whole marriage thing.
- How about a family?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Definitely want a family.
I want a little Tiger Woods running around the crib.
- [laughs] - Okay, [bleep].
- [bleep]anse--whatever you want to call it.
No, no, no. I'm 100% down with that,
and honestly, I can't see it with anybody else but her.
I think she's top dog.
So Rada's pregnant, but nobody on this trip knows about it.
I love Rada, and she's made it clear
that if we're gonna stick together and have this child,
I will have to change my ways. I will need to be faithful
and cut down on the side bitches.
But having multiple women is part of my DNA.
I'm not sure if I'm ready to change this.
- What happens, like, when you fall in love with a side bitch?
- No, I don't fall in love with no side bitch, nah, man.
- What if you get the side bitch pregnant first?
- Don't play me, my [bleep]. [laughter]
- I gotta ask.
The funny part about this
is I used to be called the "Pullout Assassin,"
and I quickly learned that I am not the "Pullout Assassin."
- It's not Rod's child.
- Then whose is it?
- Kirk Frost's.
- I'm just trying to give him some advice
from somebody who's had the lesson.
Be careful and wrap it up and be safe.
Just stay away from the side bitches.
Anyway, let's go see what these ladies got planned for us,
all right? - My guess is good as y'all.
- Turn up. Let's make a toast to that.
- All right. Yes.
- [laughs]
- So we have a fooding station. - Okay.
- We have a nail salon.
Back massage. Pedicure station.
But you know, this is not just a regular manicure.
This is your boo. - That was our thing.
I used to always do his nails. - Aw, really?
- Yes. - That's so sweet.
- Aw. You're such a good wife.
- You're so sweet, 'cause I ain't never.
[laughter]
- Yes, Princess, honey. I feel you, I do Kirk nails.
Ain't nothing wrong with that. Keep your man together.
- Listen, I believe in upkeep, and I'm all about making sure
that my man is his best self.
And if that means that I gotta get down and dirty, yes.
I'll do his feet. [laughs]
- This is the first time I'm gonna touch his toes.
Have y'all seen his toes? - Really?
[laughter]
- Have you seen his toes? - No.
- Okay, watch when he walks in.
[laughter]
- Have you guys seen his feet?
[chuckles]
His toes. His nails.
I don't even know what I need to do with them.
- Well, all right.
Well, all right. - All right, hey, fellas.
- Welcome to the Lion's Den.
- We have your drinks. - Okay.
- Find your lovely ladies.
- We're gonna pamper you today.
- You talking about my feet?
- Lay down.
- Lay down like what? - Face down.
- Wait, hold on. I was taught a rule.
- What? - Don't lay on your belly
if you don't know your selly.
[laughter]
- You deserve to be pampered, so.
- Thank you.
- Yeah, and all the girls agreed.
You got jeans on? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What you want me to have? My underwear?
- [chuckles]
- Mm-hmm. - All this time,
you never touch my feet,
and you're a good foot massager.
- Have you seen your feet?
- Yeah, I've seen my feet, but you never touched them before.
So I have to bring you on a trip for you to touch my feet?
- Look at your feet. Look at your feet.
[retches]
Where'd you go earlier?
- We went hiking. - Yeah.
- Just me, and Mendeecees, and Kirk.
- What do they think of our relationship?
I mean this is, like, something--
- They are married men, so you know,
they definitely had some great advice.
Being married, you know, matured them,
and they think--they think that's the only thing
I'm missing in my life, is just that maturity.
Because giving up the bitches is part of maturity.
- I want the baby to see that we both, as parents,
have a good relationship with each other
and not let anybody else interfere
in the middle of that.
A parent--you're supposed to protect your kids.
And I'm different when I'm parenting
than I am in real life in this relationship with you.
I really don't talk about my children
because I'm a very private person.
But I do have children from my previous marriage.
I do want to have this baby with Michael,
and I want to keep him in my life.
But there's no gray areas when it comes to my kids.
I may put up with parts of the relationship that I don't like,
but I am not willing to put my kids through
an unstable relationship.
You know, I'm different.
I'm a little more conservative when it comes to parenting,
and I hope you understand that.
Michael has not met my children.
And when the time is right, the time is right.
I feel like, until we're in something more committed,
then maybe he can come into their lives.
But I'm not about to do that.
I want to make sure that this is real.
- So why do we have a lack of passion?
- Sometimes I drop the ball.
- Do you regret getting married so soon?
- You want to have a really deep-down,
dark conversation with me, huh?
- Have you been entertaining bitches
since you filed for divorce?
- I entertained a couple bitches.
- I am a certified sexologist.
- Sexologist? - Uh-huh.
I am here to share some methods to enhance your intimacy.
[cheering] - Okay.
- I don't need no sex class.
I got four kids. I know how to have sex.
♪ ♪
[dramatic music]
- I want the baby to see that we both, as parents,
have a good relationship \h\h\h\h\hwith each other
and not let anybody \h\helse interfere
in the middle of that.
I want to make sure that this is real.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- I got you. - Like, with my 16-year-old,
I am very protective of her.
\h\h\h\hShe should see what a healthy relationship is.
I would hate to bring somebody in her life,
\h\hand all of a sudden, you walk out of her life.
You feel a sense \hof abandonment,
\h\h\h\h\hand I don’t ever want my daughter to experience that.
- I think if any woman \h\h\h\h\hgonna make me
an honest man, it’s Rada.
Rada’s the only one that can \htake me to that next level.
I really feel that she’s gonna \h\h\h\hmake me a great father,
a loving dad,
you know, make me a great husband.
\h\h\h\h\hI see a family, I see us being together,
and I see the side bitches \h\h\h\h\h\hbeing cut out.
You know, go from three, \h\h\h\h\hto two, to one.
- I didn’t even know \h\h\h\hwe had three.
- Once we get the side chick \h\hthings worked out, man,
I will be the perfect man-- \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hperfect!
\h\h\h\h\h\h- We gotta fix it to take it to the next level.
- I got you.
- So you got your eyes closed, \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hfor real?
- I’m chilling.
- Oh, man.
I want to see what they’ve got. \h\h\h\h\h\h- What have we got?
- I don’t know, but she better \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hnot be trying
no freaky [bleep] outside. \h\h\h\hI ain’t with that.
\h\h- Is your eyes closed? - Yeah, my eyes is closed.
\h\h\hI’m just staying clear, in case I gotta spit it out.
You can’t just put something in my mouth that I don’t know
what you putting in me. \h\hI need to see that.
- But you trust me, right?
\h\h\h\h- Of course, to a certain degree.
- Open your mouth.
- Like, this is real \h\h\h\hweird for me.
- Uncomfortable situations \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hsometimes
are the best situations.
\hClose your eyes. Put your head down.
Relax.
- [laughs]
- You don’t trust me?
- I can’t do it.
♪ ♪
[laughs]
\hWe not doing that no more. Uh-uh, [bleep] this [bleep].
- [laughs]
\h\h\h- You’ve got me. I can’t think straight.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hOw! - Tell me, what’s your fantasy?
- Hmm, let me see.
- Why?
- You fell in love? \h\h\h\h\h- Mm-hmm.
For me, the trip to Mexico was, \h\h\h\hyou know, very special,
\hbecause it was like being like high school kids again
and just having butterflies \h\h\h\h\h\hin your stomach.
\h\h\h\h\hAnd just having fun and just living in the moment.
\h\hYou know, for me, it was ultimately me
making the decision to say
\h\hthat I want to be with this woman for the rest of my life.
\h\h- Why’d you fall in love? - ’Cause you were very sweet,
very attentive, very caring.
And the chemistry was off the hook.
- It was.
So what’s different now?
\h- Only difference now is that we growing and still learning.
- So why do we have a lack of passion?
- We have that because, \heven though I get it,
sometimes I drop the ball.
I never want to see \h\hmy wife unhappy,
but in the beginning stages \h\h\h\h\hof a relationship,
you can drop the ball.
\h\hBut it’s all about, do you pick it back up,
and do you still \hkeep it moving?
She just has to understand
that she has to have \hpatience with me.
\h\h\h\h\h- Do you regret getting married so soon?
- Oh, hell, no. \h\hNot at all.
- Raymond and I moved rapidly, \h\h\h\h\h\hbut we’re here now.
So we have to work through it, \h\hand it’s not gonna be easy
because, as we are married \h\h\hand living together,
the passion is no longer there.
- I am not working. \h\h\hI’m relaxing.
\h\h\h\h- Right. - We’re relaxing.
We are having an amazing time, \hand this is what you wanted.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- Yes. - Some vacation time.
It’s almost too quiet \hout here sometimes.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- Yeah. You be like, "Damn"...
\h\h\h- It’s too quiet. - "Where the turn up?"
\h\h\h\h\h- It’s, like, hardworking feet, baby.
It got muscles and everything. \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hLook at this.
- My feet ain’t that ugly. \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- This is--
\h\h\h\h\h\h\hlook like you’ve been walking through fires too.
- Can you stop? \h\h- [laughs]
- She said he has ugly feet.
[laughs]
\h\hShe knows him. - Man, you got me.
\h\hYou brought me into the nail shop.
That was perfect.
- I’m still a little surprised
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hat how much we know about each other.
- Why?
- Because I did not think that \hwe were gonna win that game.
- I know.
- Now, first place winners, \h\h\h\hPrincess and Ray J!
[cheering]
\h\h- They would have said, "What’s my favorite color?"
\h- I mean what’s your favorite color, purple?
- Yes.
- That’s what I’m saying, \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hso what--
- How do you know that? \h\h\h\h\h\h- Come on.
\h\h- I don’t even have anything that’s purple.
- I’m not--I listen.
- Had my reservations \hthe past few days,
\h\h\hbut this trip has honestly been magical.
\h\h\h\hI didn’t even know that Ray had this kindness
in him anymore.
It makes me miss the beginning \h\h\h\h\hof our relationship.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\hI’ll admit that I’ve played a part
in our marriage going downhill,
\h\h\h\h\h\hbut I just hope that we can heal together.
\hWhat about the beginning of our relationship do you miss?
- I like where we are now.
- Stop doing that.
Like, just answer the question \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hthat I ask you.
You know what I mean?
You don’t miss anything.
[both chuckling]
- We had a lot of issues.
- In the beginning? \h\h\h\h\h- Mm-hmm.
\h\h\hI just think that kids just really made me see you,
and just everything,
and how I thought about things \h\h\h\h\h\hwas just different.
\h\h\h- I feel like-- after we had babies,
\h\h\h\h\h\h\hI feel like your behavior got worse.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hI was like, "Oh, he really don’t care now."
So then I stopped caring.
\h\h\h\h\h\h- Yeah. - Because I’m like,
"If he hasn’t changed by now, then it ain’t gonna happen."
- We having a perfectly \h\h\h\h\h\hgood time,
and then, all of a sudden,
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hyou just want to just stick the dagger in.
\h\h\h\hThere’s a lot of things I can say about her right now,
but that’s not me.
That’s not how I was raised,
but Princess is just being rude.
Borderline [bleep].
We’ve been in good spaces. \hWe’ve been in bad spaces.
\h\h\h\h\h\hWe’ve even been in the underworld together.
- You mean when we used to go to strip clubs and all that?
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- Yeah. - You still do that, so--
- I don’t have fun like \h\h\hI was having fun.
\h\h- So you’re, like, depressed when you go?
\h\h\h\hHave you been entertaining bitches
since you filed for divorce?
- I came here to smile \hand be with my wife,
\h\h\h\htry to work things out, but she just keeps needling me.
I entertained a couple bitches.
- Where’d you meet ’em?
♪ ♪
Look at me.
Have you been talking \h\hto somebody else?
- You want to have a really \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hdeep-down,
dark conversation with me, huh?
I think this is the perfect \htime to hit her with it.
What’s up with the panties \h\h\h\h\h\h\hin the purse?
♪ ♪
[dramatic music]
- Have you been entertaining bitches
since you filed for divorce?
- I entertained a couple bitches.
- Where'd you meet 'em?
- I went to the strip club.
♪ ♪
- I'm stunned, but I'm not surprised.
The past few years of our relationship has been rocky.
We've been separated, but living together.
But it still hurts to hear him say it out loud.
So did anything, like, become serious?
- Of course not.
- Look at me.
We haven't been on the same page.
Have you been talking to somebody else?
- No.
- You know I know when you're lying.
- I'm analyzing you as well.
♪ ♪
I made a mistake in Atlanta and reached out to some random,
and she went through my phone and saw that.
Never once did I even hook up with the person.
Was I wrong? Absolutely.
- You wouldn't tell me anyway.
- You want to have a really deep-down,
dark conversation with me, huh? - Yeah, I want to know.
- Yeah.
- So now's the time.
I'm gonna get a real reaction.
What's up with the panties in the purse?
I saw lingerie in your purse.
- Hmm? - I saw lingerie in your purse.
- I have a lot of lingerie.
- I found lingerie in your purse.
- I had--I bought lingerie.
I have lingerie all in my drawers.
- No. I saw lingerie in your purse.
- I have lingerie in my purse, in my drawers.
- I pulled out the lingerie,
and I laid a little piece of it on the purse, right.
You looked at it, and then you didn't
try to switch it or nothing.
You didn't try to change it or nothing.
It stayed like that.
- Because I'm not hiding anything.
♪ ♪
- I think that you're talking to some people on the phone.
I think that you're texting somebody, for sure.
I think you've reached out.
- I think you're allowing somebody to reach out.
Yeah.
Ask her what she did
and who she gave her number to
and who she sent pictures to and all this other stuff.
Ask her that.
I just don't want to be the only one that's made a mistake,
because that's not the case.
- I'm always at home.
I buy lingerie, I take pictures, I take selfies,
because it makes me feel good about myself.
He just filed for divorce,
so I just wanted to basically show him
and the world that I'm still hot,
even after two kids.
So you--have you been, like,
waiting to ask me this for a while?
- I've been thinking about when is the right time.
- Well, I've just been trying to feel more sexy...
- Well, you're very sexy.
- And just make myself feel good.
- You're very sexy. You're very beautiful.
- It's good to know that you care enough to do that.
- Yeah. - To, like,
set my underwear up, to see if I will move 'em.
So how did that make you feel?
- As you was checking your [bleep] outside?
Hmm, it made me feel really bad.
- So, the way you felt is how I've been feeling for years.
♪ ♪
- Well, I'm sorry if I made you feel that way.
[upbeat music]
- Your feet's nice and pretty. Mwah.
- I have fat feet. - Mm.
I know I have to start treating you better,
so I'm starting it right now.
- I'm just glad I don't have to touch
your Barney Rubble feet anymore.
- Barney Rubble? Seriously?
- [laughs]
[giggles]
- Is he eating off your toes? - [laughs]
- You messing it up for us, over here.
- Let's go, Mike. - Yeah, Mike!
- There you go, Mike. There you go, Mike.
That's what I'm talking about. The toes.
- Oh, my God!
[laughter]
- Yes. - Ooh, [bleep].
- Into the toes. - That sauce off the toes.
- Oh, yeah. - [laughs]
♪ ♪
- What are you doing?
Painting my toes?
- [laughs]
- Yeah, buddy. - Whoo!
[laughter]
- Whoo! - Ah, yes!
[cheering]
- Yes, lick it up, babe. Yes!
[laughter]
- You're a fool, babe.
[dramatic music]
- So I've been talking to the girls.
Talking to AJ.
Talking to myself damn near sometimes,
about what I want from my husband.
I want him to naturally take over the situation,
you know what I'm saying? Like a "Sex in the City"
Mr. Big type, in control,
at the end of the day. You know, he get it together.
It was, like, all of the passion
and that type of, you know,
special feeling that made me just feel so, like, ready.
That just stopped.
- [whistles]
Baby, what's up?
You all right?
Mm. What you doing?
- I don't want to do no more talking.
I just want my husband to deliver.
You know how I am at home. You know I don't want to be
an alpha female in my household.
I'm like this, and I got you here,
and I got the kids here, when I'd rather
you be the--grr. - Uh-huh.
- And you got me, and you got the kids.
And sometimes it gets frustrating that I'm taking
care of all of, you know, the planning.
I'm like the navigation and the navigator.
I understand that my husband loves it,
but I'm at that point where I just want him to be a captain.
I want to feel less of a mother and more of a wife.
I've had to be so strong.
- Mm-hmm. - Lexington's father has been
incarcerated for 90% of her life.
My daughter Lexington, who is ten years old,
her father was incarcerated when she was two years old.
And so I've had to be Mom and Dad.
I envisioned that when I got married
that I wouldn't have to be the alpha in the household.
I've had to be both ends to keep her covered.
- Mm-hmm. - When I was ready for love,
it was because I'm ready
to go back to my normal state of being
without having to be strong all the time.
Make those decisions. That's why when I said, "Grr,"
that's not me. That's not who I want to be.
And that's why I said, "I do." - I get it.
You've been the alpha in your household for a long time.
- Yeah. - I get it, and for me,
I'm a different type of alpha. I was alpha in the streets.
I was alpha in prison, so I get it, I understand.
You want me to be more of an alpha in our household.
I get it, it's 100%.
- It feels like the roles have reversed, and I understand it.
You know, you losing your mom at such a young age.
- Mm-hmm. - You being snatched out
of her home, out of her life...
- Yeah. - Out of her world,
and ultimately, you know, out of your life,
at such a young age... - Yeah.
- To then be released
from being wrongfully imprisoned,
after all those years, without a mother figure.
- People don't really understand what happens
when that big gap of your life is missing.
And people expect you to just come home,
and just get right back into the swing of things--
you know, to be the head of the household,
understand what it is to pay bills.
I didn't get that chance, and for me, it's not that easy.
I'm still learning a lot of things,
you know what I'm saying?
And so I just want you to continue to show me,
you know, how it is that you want to be loved.
- That's the problem, baby. - Yeah.
- That's what I'm missing.
I need you to have something there...
- Mm-hmm.
- That comes naturally, from on the inside.
Now, I can definitely, you know,
tell you the things that I know that you should be doing.
- Yeah. - But it has to be something
about you too.
♪ ♪
I want him to feel like, "Yeah, I was exonerated,
"but that wasn't just it.
"I was also given a chance to live within this moment
that we have here,"
or I'll always be an alpha female.
I don't want to be that, or I could have stayed single.
♪ ♪
- I am a certified sexologist.
As you inhale, I'm gonna invite you
to breathe in to your genitals.
- You want me to breathe into my own genitals?
[laughter]
- All right. I know what I gotta do.
- Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
[upbeat music]
- ♪ I could be your girl ♪
♪ Sugar dumpling, ah ♪
♪ I just can't let you go ♪
♪ Can't let you go, when I feel you... ♪
- Whoo! - Yeah.
- Okay. - Ooh.
- Hey. - Hey.
- So tonight we have something really special.
We've done with the deep stuff,
and now, it's time for us to get real sexy.
No, we going to the back, so we can act up.
- Okay.
This is very cute.
- You have the roses.
You have the pillows.
It's beautiful.
- Make yourself comfortable. - Here, lead the way.
Let me know where you want to be.
- Okay, Yandy. [chuckles]
- There's these little beds and [bleep] on the floor.
I'm like, "This is looking a little"--
- I thought we was gonna see who could make
which one of y'all,
you know... - What?
- Hit the spot first or something, I don't know.
- In front of everybody?
- Hello.
Thank you for having me.
- So these are my friends.
- Hey. - Hi.
- It's such an honor to be here.
My name is Devi Ward Erickson,
and I am a certified tantric healer.
- A what?
♪ ♪
- I am a certified sexologist.
- Sexologist? - Uh-huh.
- Ooh. - I don't need no sex class.
I got four kids. I know how to have sex.
- So I have been practicing and teaching
tantric sexual healing for 13 years.
Before that, I was a monk.
- Wait, I didn't know monk came in ladies.
- In our tradition, they did. - Okay.
- Before that, I was a stripper in Detroit.
- Hey. - Whoo!
- Okay. - You have lived
a well-traveled life. - You better go, girl.
- Yes, ma'am.
- So tantra is a spiritual science.
It's a way of uniting our sexuality
with our spiritual path.
And in our tradition, every orgasm
is considered to be a glimpse of enlightenment.
- Wow. - And enlightenment
is our experience of God. - Huh.
- So every time we have an orgasm,
we are getting a glimpse of God.
- Even if you pull it out?
[laughter]
- Even if you pull out.
Especially if you learn how to orgasm without ejaculating.
- What? - Wait, wait, wait.
He can have the orgasm without ejaculating?
- Exactly. - Wow.
I need to learn that [bleep] right there.
- Yes, and women can have over 15 different types of orgasm.
- 15? - 15?
- You guys are trying to make us work harder?
You know what it take to make a woman [bleep]
in the first place?
It takes a lot. Now, you want to tell us
there's 14 more ways she can [bleep] a [bleep]?
- So that's part of what I'm gonna share
with you guys today.
Methods to allow your body
to have the kind of orgasms that it wants to have.
- I've experienced probably...
I haven't experienced 14.
Let's just say it like that.
I'm still stuck at maybe two or three.
So, okay. Talk to me.
- To begin with, I would love to do a connection practice.
Are you guys willing to stand up?
So what I'm gonna invite you to do
is stand in front of each other with your hands up
and palm to palm.
Palms touching.
And now, I'm gonna invite you to look into each other's eyes.
Okay, and I want you to think about when you guys
first got together
and how exciting it was.
♪ ♪
How you couldn't wait to see each other.
We want to make sure that our heart is full of love.
All right. You can let your hands go now.
So we're gonna do a movement practice right now.
We're going to enhance our sexual energy by doing thrusts.
[laughter] - Yes?
Right?
Okay, well, I'm gonna invite you to have a seat.
Get comfortable.
You can sit facing each other, cross-legged.
♪ ♪
- Are you sure? - Get that ass over here.
Are you serious?
- No it's cool. - Shut up.
- You good?
Okay. - Yeah.
- You all right? - Yeah, I'm fine.
- Everybody's serious but us. - Nobody's serious.
What are you talking about? This is supposed to be fun.
- Put one hand on your heart.
So that's gonna create the circuit of connection
between you two.
Can you feel that?
Feel that circuit of connection?
'Cause you guys are sharing your love right now.
So, like that,
and then he puts his hand on your heart, like that.
There you go. Beautiful.
- Oh, and then I go like this. - Yeah.
Can you feel that?
So is there anything I can share with you today
that will support your intimate connection?
- Um,
when we are intimate, it's just the same position
every single time. - Hmm, mm-hmm.
- And he doesn't, like, really look at me.
♪ ♪
- Well, you gotta make eye--Ray J,
you're having a hard time looking at her right now.
♪ ♪
So Ray J, I'm gonna invite you
to make eye contact with this stunning queen.
Please.
♪ ♪
- I wish that he would look me in the eyes more.
It's like he has to look at me in the back of my head,
if you know what I mean.
And I'm just tired of that position.
He's kind of just like a "wham,
bam, thank you, ma'am" type of person.
- Let her receive you.
♪ ♪
You guys love each other.
- I have no problem looking at anybody in the eyes.
It's just that when I'm staring in your eyes,
and you look away, then it creates a disconnect.
- This is part of the process.
♪ ♪
- I have a gift bag for you. all: Ooh.
- Got some toys for you to play with tonight.
\h\h\h\h\h- So Ray J, I’m gonna invite you
\h\h\hto make eye contact with this stunning queen.
Please.
And let her receive you, right?
So this is part of the process.
[dramatic music]
- Because I’m always hitting it \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hfrom the side.
\h\h\h\h\h\hSo it blocks the--kind of, like, the--
the one-on-one eye contact.
I think I can work \h\hon eye contact.
- You guys love each other.
- I have no problem making eye contact
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hwith you while we’re making love.
And I’ll do better with that.
- So when are you gonna \h\h\h\h\h\hstart that?
\h\h\h\h\h\h\hTonight? - If she give it to me.
- Will you make eye contact? \h\h\h\h\h\h- All night long.
I’ll put some Visine \h\h\h\h\hin my eyes.
- [laughs]
- Yes. - Yes?
\h\h\h\h\h\hOkay. All right, good.
- I’ve just sort of gotten used \h\hto not having sex with him.
But I want to just \h\hmove past this
\hand have some sort of connection again,
because I really want things \h\h\h\h\h\h\hto get better.
But I’ll believe it \h\hwhen I see it.
- I want to support you \hthe best that I can.
\h\h\h\hIs there anything that I can share with you
\h\h\h\hthat would help enhance your intimacy?
- Yes. - Yes?
- I’m the freak.
\hHe’s a little bit more conservative.
- Yeah.
- So I want to, you know,
make him become me, \hand I become him.
I know that I have to help him \h\h\h\h\hwith different things
\h\h\hbased on what he’s been through.
And I’m totally cool with that.
- Yeah. Right.
Does that work for you? \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- Fine.
- Yeah. \hOkay.
- It can be frustrating when you feel like you
are giving everything, \h\h\h\hand sometimes,
\h\h\hyou might feel like it’s not enough.
But it doesn’t mean \hthat you give up.
- So I’ma go a little slower.
\hJust pull me up, like you just did.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- Mm-hmm. - No, babe. You go slow.
\h\h- That’s what she said. Said we just gotta go slow.
\h\h\h\hWhy? What’s wrong?
\h\h\hI want to be, you know, relaxed,
and be able to close my eyes.
It’s so sexy to me
to envision my husband \h\h\hleading the way.
That’s my ideal marriage.
- Then I’ll go slow, so I’ve \hjust gotta be in it, like--
Deelishis, I got you.
\h\h\h\h\h\hAll right. I know what I gotta do.
♪ ♪
- Yeah?
- Till I get excited. \h\h\h\h- Yeah, baby.
Like, come on.
Get that [bleep].
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- Oh, my God. Did you really just say that?
[laughs]
[quirky music]
- Wow.
- And it’s still going.
- Like, wow.
\h\h\hOkay. - Oh, yes.
- [laughs]
My man.
I need you to hit it \h\h\hjust like that.
- Deelishis is doing it \h\h\h\h\h\h\hexactly.
[laughter]
- Now, as you inhale,
\h\h\h\h\hI’m gonna invite you to breathe in to your genitals.
Inhale your partner \h\h\hall the way--
\h\h- You said what about my genitals?
- [laughs]
\h\h\h\h\h- I want you to breathe in to them.
- You want me to breathe \h\hinto my own genitals?
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h[laughter] - Yep, I want you to breathe.
\h\h\hI want you to inhale your partner’s life essence
into your genitals.
\h\h\hAnd then when you exhale, I want you to send them energy
from your genitals, \hfrom your pelvis.
\h\h\h\h\h\h- Did she say that I’m supposed to feel
Mendeecees’ genitals \h\hbreathing on me?
- I have never, ever breathed \hthrough my genitals before.
\h\hI haven’t even heard that till we got into this class.
- If I ever felt a [bleep] \h\h\h\h\hbreathing on me,
\h\h\hthat is the last time I want to see that [bleep].
- Okay, how are you guys doing? \h\h\h\h\hI know you’re tired.
- I’m getting a cramp \h\h\h\h\hin my leg.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- [laughs] - Yeah, do you want to...
\h\h\h\h\h\h- Yeah. - Change positions?
- I feel like I was sitting on the toilet for too long.
- Were you guys able to do \hthe alternate breathing?
- Mm-hmm.
- Did you feel the exchange \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hat all?
\h\h- Yeah. It’s good.
- I don’t feel his genitals \h\h\h\h\hbreathing though.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- [laughs] - I was waiting to feel that.
- So you guys did amazing. \h\hI’m gonna give you guys
\h\h\h\ha little bit of an anatomy lesson.
\h\h\hSo what I was sharing with you guys individually
\his that the female body has more erectile tissue
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hinternally than the man has externally.
So you guys, I want to imagine \h\h\h\h\h\htrying to have sex
with half an erection, right?
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hSo ideally, when you guys are at home,
it’s not gonna take that long
\h\h\h\h\hto go through all those steps, okay?
But did you find benefit \hfrom spending some time
looking into each other’s eyes \h\h\hand sharing your breath?
- Yep. - Yeah?
Okay, good.
\h\hAnd... [applause]
I have a gift bag for you. \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hall: Ooh.
- Got some toys for you \hto play with tonight.
- Oh, yeah.
- So, I’m going to invite you,
as your homework,
\h\h\h\hto take turns giving and receiving.
- Thank you.
- And this is how you nourish
and cultivate the soil \h\h\h\h\hof your love.
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h- Thank you. - The garden of your love.
- Thank you. \h\h\h- Yes.
You have lubricant in there.
You have a vibrator in there.
- Yes. Gladly.
- [laughs]
[crickets chirping]
- ♪ I don’t need the lovin’ ♪
- I have all the tools \h\h\hI need now to--
to enhance the flavor.
I want to thank the doctor \h\h\h\h\hfor the gift bag.
We’re going through it now
to see what kind of goodies \h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hare in it.
See what we can use.
- Yo.
- Huh.
\h\h- Yo. [laughs]
♪ ♪
- I’m gonna practice taking \h\h\h\h\h20 to 40 minutes
before we get to it.
I’m gonna see how that work.
\h\hAnd Rasheeda, you have to return the favors, okay?
- Thank you. \h- [laughs]
\h\h\h- She called it a spirit--what is it?
Your spiritual wand \hor your--damn it.
\h\hNow I forgot the term. I have to go read her book.
[laughs]
- Great tantric sex.
Last night was very sexy.
I was enlightened
to find out
\h\h\h\h\h\h\h\hso many things about my husband and his body.
And, uh,
15 different orgasms.
- Your boy’s in business.
[upbeat music]
- Are you nervous?
- Try to get this. Just swim to this.
Come on, Michael.
- Teach this mother sucker how to swim.
- You're not moving! [laughter]
- Last day. Time to renegotiate
our relationship contracts and say goodbye.
- I enjoyed each and every one of y'all.
- Getting to know y'all and be around you guys was dope.
- These are our friends that we've exchanged numbers with.
I just couldn't keep this to myself any longer.
Besides, this is something everybody's gonna want to hear.
We've been keeping a secret from you guys.
We've been keeping it from you guys the whole time.
- Goodbye. all: Whoo!
- Tell me one thing you learned.
- I learned there's, like, 15 different ways
that, you know--that they--
- Are you trying to be shy? Just say it.
15 ways to make a woman [bleep].
Ow. - [laughs]
- Anything new now than when you first arrived?
- I'm pregnant. - I did not know this.
- I called you stupid. You called me a [bleep].
- You called me stupid 20 times, because--
- Called you stupid 20 times? - Absolutely.
- Okay, you're [bleep].
- I think we're done. - Okay, good.
- You don't want people to see
how much of a [bleep] up person you are?
- [bleep] dumbass.
♪ ♪