1 00:00:12,929 --> 00:00:13,888 - Nessa, I know it's my week, 2 00:00:13,930 --> 00:00:14,848 but I need you to stay with Mom 3 00:00:14,889 --> 00:00:15,890 while I get some things 4 00:00:15,932 --> 00:00:16,850 worked out at my apartment. 5 00:00:16,891 --> 00:00:18,143 - What kind of things? 6 00:00:18,184 --> 00:00:19,102 - I got kicked out. 7 00:00:19,144 --> 00:00:20,186 - Dad... 8 00:00:20,228 --> 00:00:21,479 - Don't worry. I got it handled. 9 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:23,732 I actually found a pretty fucking great situation. 10 00:00:25,775 --> 00:00:27,193 I'm living in a 24-hour gym. 11 00:00:27,235 --> 00:00:28,862 - It doesn't sound great. 12 00:00:28,903 --> 00:00:30,822 - You gotta hear the sales pitch. 13 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,365 There's hot showers, 14 00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:35,035 clean bathroom, swimming pool, 15 00:00:35,076 --> 00:00:40,081 hot tub, clean towels on demand... 16 00:00:40,123 --> 00:00:41,666 uh, fancy shampoo, 17 00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:42,792 flat screens everywhere-- 18 00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:49,299 Cable, free Wi-Fi-- I mean, come on, Nessa. 19 00:00:49,341 --> 00:00:51,343 This gym even has a gym. 20 00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:52,886 Daddy gonna get swole. 21 00:00:52,927 --> 00:00:54,471 - Aw, no, my lucky quarter. 22 00:00:54,512 --> 00:00:57,307 The best part is, it's $55 a month. 23 00:00:57,349 --> 00:01:00,477 That's, like, $800 less I was paying in rent. 24 00:01:00,518 --> 00:01:02,979 It's just too bad I can't have you here staying with me. 25 00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:04,022 - Come to papa. 26 00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,023 - As long as you're good. 27 00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,691 - I'm thriving. 28 00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:09,694 This is an upgrade. Anyway, I gotta go. 29 00:01:09,736 --> 00:01:10,737 - I love you, Dad. 30 00:01:10,779 --> 00:01:12,655 - I love you too, sweetie. - Bye. 31 00:01:12,697 --> 00:01:14,491 - I found it! 32 00:01:14,532 --> 00:01:15,742 - Congratulations, Arthur. 33 00:01:15,784 --> 00:01:17,952 Can you find some fucking drawers, please? 34 00:01:23,249 --> 00:01:25,669 - Living in a gym sounds awesome. 35 00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,671 - Except they only gave me one locker. 36 00:01:27,712 --> 00:01:29,506 I don't have anywhere to put my shit. 37 00:01:29,547 --> 00:01:32,258 - Take this as an opportunity to scale back. 38 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:33,301 It's quite liberating. 39 00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:34,344 When I started sleeping 40 00:01:34,386 --> 00:01:35,512 in the billboard car, 41 00:01:35,553 --> 00:01:37,597 I was like, "How will I ever survive 42 00:01:37,639 --> 00:01:38,640 "without my books 43 00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:42,185 "and my TV and my pots and pans 44 00:01:42,227 --> 00:01:43,436 and my mum's wedding dress?" 45 00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:45,897 Which was the only thing I had that reminded me 46 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:48,483 of a time when my parents were both still alive 47 00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:50,985 and I was just, you know... 48 00:01:51,027 --> 00:01:52,153 happy. 49 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:56,866 The point is, you really only need one pan. 50 00:01:56,908 --> 00:01:59,077 - I still don't know how you live in a billboard. 51 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:00,704 Like, where do you go to shower? 52 00:02:00,745 --> 00:02:02,872 - I go to my stepmom's place in Hialeah. 53 00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:04,416 But she's very mean, 54 00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:07,252 so I have to sneak in when she goes out to the bar, 55 00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:09,754 which means I can shower pretty much every night-- 56 00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:11,006 most afternoons too. 57 00:02:11,047 --> 00:02:12,340 She's a drunk. Whatever. 58 00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:14,592 - So you have a wicked stepmother? 59 00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:16,845 - Oh, I have the whole Cinderella package: 60 00:02:16,886 --> 00:02:21,433 dead dad, evil stepmom, two evil stepsisters... 61 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:24,102 except they're not ugly. They're actually gorgeous, 62 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,021 and they're dogs. 63 00:02:26,062 --> 00:02:27,397 - And yet they're evil? 64 00:02:27,439 --> 00:02:29,524 - Ugh, that doesn't even begin to describe it. 65 00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:32,944 They are so mean to me. 66 00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:36,072 They're just jealous because I can come and go as I please. 67 00:02:36,114 --> 00:02:38,408 - You just said you have to sneak in to take a shower. 68 00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:40,368 - Yes, but I can open the door with my hand, 69 00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:42,287 and that's what I mean. 70 00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:44,956 It's getting late. Should we call it a night, 71 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:45,957 try again tomorrow? 72 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,751 - Oh, about that. 73 00:02:47,792 --> 00:02:48,668 I can't tomorrow. 74 00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:50,962 I have tickets to Dominine Con. 75 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:52,297 - What's Dominine Con? 76 00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:53,631 - It's all these speakers that get together 77 00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:55,300 to teach you how to get better at business. 78 00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:57,344 They don't just teach you how to domin-ate. 79 00:02:57,385 --> 00:02:58,887 They teach you how to domi-nine. 80 00:02:58,928 --> 00:03:00,221 - Oh, I love that. 81 00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:01,806 That sounds like something Mark Wahlberg would say. 82 00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:03,308 - He spoke at the last convention. 83 00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:04,392 Well, he didn't really speak. 84 00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:05,560 He did a pre-taped chant. 85 00:03:05,602 --> 00:03:06,561 But it's still pretty cool though. 86 00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:08,146 Anyway, I hate to bail on you, 87 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:09,522 but Rita Gaines is coming, 88 00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:12,609 and I paid for a gold-tier wristband, 89 00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:15,362 which means I get to pitch to her one on one! 90 00:03:15,403 --> 00:03:17,405 I'ma see if she'll invest in a saw palmetto farm. 91 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:19,366 - Oh my God. This is amazing! 92 00:03:19,407 --> 00:03:20,325 - So you're sure you don't mind? 93 00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:21,534 - Of course not. 94 00:03:21,576 --> 00:03:22,911 This is why it's good to be in a team. 95 00:03:22,952 --> 00:03:25,663 One of can go into the city to meet their hero, 96 00:03:25,705 --> 00:03:28,541 while the other one trudges through the swamp. 97 00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:29,668 - Seems like you mind a little bit. 98 00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:32,754 - I really don't. I love to trudge. 99 00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,307 - What? 100 00:03:44,349 --> 00:03:46,351 You never seen a customer covered in snake blood before? 101 00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:49,187 - Okay, tough guy. Stop flirtin' with Paula. 102 00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,522 Is it Paula? - No. 103 00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:52,357 - Hmm, that's interesting. 104 00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:54,401 I'm usually pretty good at spottin' a Paula. 105 00:03:54,442 --> 00:03:57,195 I'll have a cheeseburger, fries, coffee, milkshake-- 106 00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:58,196 coffee and a milkshake, 107 00:03:58,238 --> 00:03:59,572 not a coffee milkshake. 108 00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:02,867 Thank you, Paula. 109 00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:04,160 - Sorry, not-Paula. 110 00:04:04,202 --> 00:04:05,286 - Here you go-- 111 00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:06,830 here's Dad's old suit. 112 00:04:06,871 --> 00:04:08,873 I don't know why you want this ashy thing. 113 00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:10,250 You're not actually gonna wear this, are you? 114 00:04:10,291 --> 00:04:13,211 - I have to. Mine got bit up by a snake, 115 00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:14,921 and I'm going to Dominine tomorrow. 116 00:04:14,963 --> 00:04:16,464 - Oh yeah... Dominine. 117 00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:17,882 I looked that shit up online-- 118 00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:19,009 - I know. I know. 119 00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:20,510 You think everything of mine is stupid. 120 00:04:20,552 --> 00:04:22,345 - That's not true. I like Vanessa... 121 00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:23,680 and Camille. 122 00:04:23,722 --> 00:04:24,848 You had that one hat I loved. 123 00:04:24,889 --> 00:04:26,683 - The blue Kangol. - But also, Dominine-- 124 00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:29,310 despite its dumb fucking name, it sounds interesting. 125 00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:30,729 I might check it out. - For real? 126 00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:32,272 Cause every time I talk to you about business stuff, 127 00:04:32,313 --> 00:04:33,273 you roll your eyes. 128 00:04:33,314 --> 00:04:34,399 - Because you broke. 129 00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:35,900 Nobody wants to take financial advice 130 00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:37,736 from a man who has to borrow his dead dad's suit. 131 00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:39,612 But that Dominine guy-- Rodney whatever-- 132 00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:41,031 he's got, like, three jets, 133 00:04:41,072 --> 00:04:45,243 and DJ Khaled played his ten-year-old's birthday party. 134 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:47,579 Two songs. I can fuck with that guy. 135 00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,914 Okay. Okay. 136 00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:52,083 Tickets are mad expensive. - Already got mine, 137 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:54,586 plus something called "The Power Broker's Parking Pass." 138 00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:56,588 - No shit? That's the best parking pass. 139 00:04:56,629 --> 00:04:58,423 They got permission to paint over the handicap signs. 140 00:04:58,465 --> 00:04:59,924 Oh man. 141 00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:02,218 I'm so glad you want to do this with me. 142 00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:03,595 Dominine. 143 00:05:03,636 --> 00:05:05,638 - You learned the secret hand gesture... 144 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:06,473 - Mm-hmm. 145 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,650 Profit gangster. 146 00:05:17,692 --> 00:05:19,444 "Can't talk--busy balling." I like that. 147 00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:22,947 - Dominine tees. Only 65 each. 148 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:25,241 - $65? 149 00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:27,118 He's paying a light bill. 150 00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:33,458 - Craig Foster. Ready to dominine. 151 00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,336 Okay, sir. 152 00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:39,339 Looks like you're Gold Tier. 153 00:05:39,381 --> 00:05:41,007 Here's your pass. It's non-transferrable. 154 00:05:41,049 --> 00:05:42,801 Don't lose it-- and your wristband. 155 00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:44,344 Now I just need a credit card. 156 00:05:44,386 --> 00:05:45,679 - Credit card? I paid online. 157 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:47,514 I did early bird. - Yes, I saw that. 158 00:05:47,555 --> 00:05:49,808 I just need an additional $39.99 for the lanyard. 159 00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:52,018 - But the tickets were already $400, 160 00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:53,395 plus $200 for the Gold Tier. 161 00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:55,230 - I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you were poor. 162 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:59,025 Hey, Brenda, where are the free lanyards for losers? 163 00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,485 - That's cool, Brenda! 164 00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:02,028 That's cool. I got it. 165 00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:06,783 - Attention real players and big ballers: 166 00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:08,827 the convention will start shortly. 167 00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:11,454 Time is money, so get in those seats. 168 00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,002 Oh. 169 00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:21,589 - Warning. Warning. 170 00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,216 Warning. The following presentation 171 00:06:23,258 --> 00:06:26,428 may cause seizures, abnormal growth of your bank account... 172 00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:36,938 Yeah. 173 00:06:38,690 --> 00:06:40,025 - For hundreds of years, 174 00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:42,485 those who survived the battlefield 175 00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:45,530 did so by dominating. 176 00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:48,658 But now, to dominate is not enough. 177 00:06:48,700 --> 00:06:50,702 Rodney Lamonca's money-making 178 00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:53,038 strategies are too explosive. 179 00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:55,540 A coalition of naysayers and little bitches 180 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:56,666 has formed to stop it. 181 00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:59,294 - I want him dead! 182 00:07:01,212 --> 00:07:02,464 - It's intense, huh? 183 00:07:02,505 --> 00:07:04,341 - Hey man, if you can get people this excited 184 00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:07,052 about spending 600 bucks, you're doing something right. 185 00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:10,930 - Because Dominine Con is about to begin 186 00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:13,141 in three... 187 00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:14,392 two... 188 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,519 one... 189 00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:19,105 nine. 190 00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:22,275 Come on, get up! 191 00:07:22,317 --> 00:07:24,402 Come on! Let's go! 192 00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,738 Let me hear you! What? 193 00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:29,240 What'd you say? 194 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:30,784 I got a question: 195 00:07:30,825 --> 00:07:33,370 who here is wet for a payday? 196 00:07:33,411 --> 00:07:35,163 What? 197 00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:37,582 I said, who here is wet for a payday? 198 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,670 My dear, he's dripping wet. You're soaking. 199 00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:43,755 Let me feel them panties. Let me feel them panties. 200 00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,423 Look at that-- oh it's wet! 201 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:50,970 Oh, shit. 202 00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:52,263 Are y'all ready? 203 00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:55,392 Throw me some nines, huh? 204 00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:57,602 Throw me those nines. Get 'em up high! 205 00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,688 Hey, hey, hey, shut the fuck up. 206 00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:01,731 All right. We gotta keep the show moving. 207 00:08:01,773 --> 00:08:03,316 That's like my mama used to say-- 208 00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:06,069 she used to say, "Rodney, you gotta share the stage. 209 00:08:06,111 --> 00:08:07,028 You gotta share." 210 00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:11,574 That bitch was poor. 211 00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:13,284 Okay? She was a teacher. 212 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:14,994 And she never wanted 213 00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:16,955 to be anything better than that. 214 00:08:16,996 --> 00:08:18,790 So we don't have to listen to that bitch, do we? 215 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,500 Right. 216 00:08:20,542 --> 00:08:22,711 I'ma bring out the first speaker tonight. 217 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:25,213 This woman is a trailblazer. 218 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:28,091 She's one of the most incredible female entrepreneurs 219 00:08:28,133 --> 00:08:29,300 I've ever been around. 220 00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:32,637 Oh, and by the way, 221 00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:35,056 she's a fucking knockout. 222 00:08:35,098 --> 00:08:36,683 All right. Let's bring her to the stage-- 223 00:08:36,725 --> 00:08:40,103 my wife, Katrina Lamonca! 224 00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:45,608 - I read online that we should get in line 225 00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:47,318 for workshops now. They fill up fast. 226 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:48,403 - All right. 227 00:08:48,445 --> 00:08:51,322 - How amazing is my husband? 228 00:08:54,659 --> 00:08:56,453 "Tech Start-Ups 229 00:08:56,494 --> 00:08:57,996 and the Culture of Creation." 230 00:08:58,038 --> 00:08:59,748 - Yeah, but that takes up all morning. 231 00:08:59,789 --> 00:09:01,875 I gotta get in line for Rita in an hour. 232 00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:03,710 Plus, what do you care about tech start-ups? 233 00:09:03,752 --> 00:09:04,919 - Look, I didn't wanna say nothin' 'cause I thought 234 00:09:04,961 --> 00:09:06,713 you'd be a dick, but I'm startin' an app. 235 00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:08,256 - What? - Just forget about it, 236 00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:09,466 all right? - I thought you never wanted 237 00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:10,383 to have a job. - I never wanted 238 00:09:10,425 --> 00:09:11,843 to have a boss. 239 00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:13,011 Plus, I like my life, 240 00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:15,555 and I don't wanna end up dead or in jail, 241 00:09:15,597 --> 00:09:17,390 so I'm playing out a few options. 242 00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:19,517 - Holy shit. This is huge. 243 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:21,436 What's the app? Do you have funding? 244 00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:22,687 You know I've always believed in you. 245 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,439 My little brother done good. 246 00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:26,483 - Don't even start that shit. 247 00:09:26,524 --> 00:09:27,692 Fuck you. 248 00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:28,943 See you after. 249 00:09:28,985 --> 00:09:29,861 - Zay. 250 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:32,489 - Don't you dare say it. 251 00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,115 - I'm proud of you. - You dick. 252 00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,041 - God damn it. 253 00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:03,728 - Come on in. Workshop starts in ten. 254 00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:05,021 Sir, you have a pass? 255 00:10:05,063 --> 00:10:06,147 - Yeah. 256 00:10:06,189 --> 00:10:07,232 What the fuck happened to my lanyard? 257 00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:08,358 - Clasp probably broke. 258 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:09,901 Bet it's on the ground here somewhere. 259 00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:12,070 It's been happening a lot. - I paid $39 for this. 260 00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:15,073 - Should've gone for the $60 version. 261 00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,534 - Thank you. 262 00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:22,372 He'd better not. 263 00:10:22,414 --> 00:10:23,957 Zay. 264 00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:25,792 What the fuck? Where'd you get those? 265 00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:27,585 - Remember my buddy Nick? 266 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:28,920 He does janitorial work here now, 267 00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:30,213 and they do not do background checks. 268 00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:32,340 He let me steal some stuff from the prep suite. 269 00:10:32,382 --> 00:10:33,591 I ain't mad at this T-shirt. 270 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:35,927 - Hey, are you the Gold Tier guy? 271 00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,554 - Who's asking? A loser, 272 00:10:37,595 --> 00:10:40,807 or somebody with a huge dick that knows what he wants? 273 00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:42,350 - Huge dick. - Then it's $350. 274 00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:44,728 - They're sold out downstairs. I'm so glad I found you. 275 00:10:44,769 --> 00:10:47,272 - Thank you for your business. 276 00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,607 And good luck layin' waste to them haters. 277 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:51,026 - So this is what you came here for? 278 00:10:51,067 --> 00:10:52,110 You're not really makin' an app? 279 00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:53,611 - Fuck no, I'm not making a app. 280 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:54,946 What app would I make? 281 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,406 Every app already exists. 282 00:10:56,448 --> 00:10:58,283 - I was so proud of you. 283 00:10:58,324 --> 00:10:59,784 - Well, you should be even more proud of me, man. 284 00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,327 I made 2,800 in, like, ten minutes. 285 00:11:01,369 --> 00:11:03,538 - It's fraud! You rippin' people off. 286 00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:06,124 - Rippin' people off is what Dominine is all about. 287 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:08,877 $40 lanyards... $65 T-shirts. 288 00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:11,713 We paid to steal a handicapped parking space. 289 00:11:11,755 --> 00:11:15,133 - They have to make money to put together a good experience. 290 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:16,968 A good experience when all the speakers are all related? 291 00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:19,054 - Not Rita Gaines. I am so fucking stupid. 292 00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:20,305 I actually believed you were here 293 00:11:20,347 --> 00:11:21,765 'cause you wanted to be here with me. 294 00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:22,724 - I'm sorry man, but it's just too good 295 00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:24,142 of an opportunity to pass up. 296 00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:25,810 The kind of people that come to these things 297 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:28,188 are morons just beggin' to get scammed. 298 00:11:28,229 --> 00:11:29,147 - Fuck you. 299 00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,732 You know what Rita says? - Rita... 300 00:11:30,774 --> 00:11:32,233 - "You gotta lose the dead weight 301 00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:33,318 "if you wanna soar. 302 00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:34,569 You gotta trim the fat." 303 00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:35,612 - Am I the fat in this scenario? 304 00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:37,447 - I'm done with you, Zay. 305 00:11:37,489 --> 00:11:39,157 I'm trimming your ass. 306 00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:40,200 Trim, trim. 307 00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,661 - That's not as cool as you think it is! 308 00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:44,913 - Trim, trim, motherfucka. 309 00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:58,843 - Hi. I'm Prada Lamonca. 310 00:11:58,885 --> 00:12:00,887 I'm sure you all know my dad? 311 00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:04,683 I know what you're thinking. 312 00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:08,395 "Prada, you're ten years old. Shouldn't you be in school?" 313 00:12:08,436 --> 00:12:10,397 No. I quit. 314 00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:13,650 Why would I want to learn from someone who makes $40,000 315 00:12:13,692 --> 00:12:16,027 in an entire year? 316 00:12:17,404 --> 00:12:20,448 "But Prada, teachers have good benefits." 317 00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:21,533 Guess what. 318 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,703 Health care is not a benefit. 319 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,871 You know what is a benefit? 320 00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,164 Confidence. 321 00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:30,709 Let me show you. I need a volunteer. 322 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,377 You, sir. 323 00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:33,837 - Me? - He's all, "Me?" 324 00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:35,505 Yes, you. Get up here. 325 00:12:38,216 --> 00:12:40,719 Do you know why I picked this man? 326 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:44,764 I picked him 'cause he is the hottest man 327 00:12:44,806 --> 00:12:49,644 in this entire room. 328 00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,354 Do you think you're hot, sir? 329 00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:53,690 - I guess. 330 00:12:53,732 --> 00:12:56,317 - Don't do that. 331 00:12:56,359 --> 00:12:59,154 You just went from an eight to a five. 332 00:12:59,195 --> 00:13:01,656 Hotness is all about confidence. 333 00:13:01,698 --> 00:13:03,700 Own your shit. 334 00:13:03,742 --> 00:13:05,785 Own your shit. 335 00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:08,538 - Who in this room is hotter than you? 336 00:13:08,580 --> 00:13:09,581 This guy. 337 00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:10,749 Is this guy hotter than you? 338 00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,625 - What? - No, he's not. 339 00:13:12,667 --> 00:13:14,544 - What's not hot about him? 340 00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:15,879 Oh, you were doing so well. 341 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,381 Come on. Tell everybody 342 00:13:18,423 --> 00:13:20,342 why this guy's not hot. 343 00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:21,718 Is it his body? 344 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:22,719 Is it his face? 345 00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:23,928 - I think it's his face. 346 00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:25,930 His face is weird, and it's not hot at all. 347 00:13:25,972 --> 00:13:27,849 - Hey, where do you think you're going? 348 00:13:27,891 --> 00:13:28,808 - My friend's having an emergency. 349 00:13:28,850 --> 00:13:29,768 I'm sorry. I gotta go. 350 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:30,894 - Wow. See that? 351 00:13:30,935 --> 00:13:32,062 You owned your shit, 352 00:13:32,103 --> 00:13:33,229 and you bullied him into leaving. 353 00:13:33,271 --> 00:13:35,440 That's what I'm talking about, people! 354 00:13:38,109 --> 00:13:41,613 Get out of here, loser! 355 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:43,073 - What is it? You okay? 356 00:13:43,114 --> 00:13:44,366 - Yeah. I wanted to show you 357 00:13:44,407 --> 00:13:46,826 that I just killed a snake. - Damn, big fella. 358 00:13:46,868 --> 00:13:48,745 Why didn't you just text me a photo? 359 00:13:48,787 --> 00:13:49,746 And why are you dressed so nice? 360 00:13:49,788 --> 00:13:51,998 - Oh, this old thing? 361 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,376 I got dirty in the swamp, so I had to change. 362 00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:55,960 - Seriously. 363 00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:57,587 - Okay, fine. 364 00:13:57,629 --> 00:13:59,089 I wanted to come to Dominine. 365 00:13:59,130 --> 00:14:02,092 It's just been a long time since I've thought of myself 366 00:14:02,133 --> 00:14:04,803 as anything other than an Uber driver. 367 00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:06,012 I thought maybe if I came along, 368 00:14:06,054 --> 00:14:07,597 I could learn some stuff. 369 00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:09,432 So I put on my best dress, 370 00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:12,018 which I wore to prom, and also to my dad's funeral, 371 00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:13,269 and I came right down here. 372 00:14:13,311 --> 00:14:15,271 - If I had known, I would've invited you. 373 00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:17,899 But tickets are like $400. 374 00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:19,901 - Oh, wow. - Sorry. 375 00:14:19,943 --> 00:14:22,195 - No, it's fine. 376 00:14:22,237 --> 00:14:23,905 It's always good to have an opportunity 377 00:14:23,947 --> 00:14:25,365 to be put in your place. 378 00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:27,784 That way, you remember where you stand in the world, 379 00:14:27,826 --> 00:14:30,078 and I am not a business lady. 380 00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:31,287 I'm a swamp thing. 381 00:14:31,329 --> 00:14:33,957 - You're not a swamp thing, Jillian G. 382 00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:35,417 Have some confidence. 383 00:14:35,458 --> 00:14:36,918 Own your shit. 384 00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:41,297 - I wish I could, but there's no way of getting in here. 385 00:14:41,339 --> 00:14:43,466 - Yes, there is. 386 00:14:43,508 --> 00:14:44,426 Fuck! 387 00:14:44,467 --> 00:14:46,511 What up, Trim Trim? 388 00:14:46,553 --> 00:14:47,595 - Don't call me Trim Trim. 389 00:14:47,637 --> 00:14:49,639 - What's this favor you need from me? 390 00:14:49,681 --> 00:14:50,807 - Do you have any extra passes? 391 00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:52,434 - Fuck yeah, I got extra passes. 392 00:14:52,475 --> 00:14:53,893 Whatever you need. - Let me get one. 393 00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:56,312 - But I need you to admit that I was right. 394 00:14:56,354 --> 00:14:59,274 This conference is a scam, and you're a dumbass for attending. 395 00:15:04,279 --> 00:15:06,489 - Hi. I'm Jillian, by the way-- 396 00:15:06,531 --> 00:15:07,532 Craig's snake friend. 397 00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:09,367 No, I'm owning my shit. 398 00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:11,828 I'm Jillian. I'm a business lady. 399 00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:13,538 - Your bag is leaking blood. 400 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:15,623 - Thank you. That's valuable feedback. 401 00:15:15,665 --> 00:15:16,875 I'll adjust accordingly. 402 00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:18,376 - And if you don't give her a pass right now, 403 00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:19,961 I'ma tell Dominine what you're up to 404 00:15:20,003 --> 00:15:21,421 and get you thrown out of here. 405 00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:24,632 Say I won't. - You won't. 406 00:15:24,674 --> 00:15:26,634 Security! 407 00:15:26,676 --> 00:15:29,012 Oh... okay. Okay. 408 00:15:29,054 --> 00:15:30,930 - Never mind. 409 00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:33,016 Shit. I gotta get in line for Rita. 410 00:15:33,058 --> 00:15:34,976 Look, the pass gets you in everywhere. 411 00:15:35,018 --> 00:15:36,978 Check stuff out. Have fun. 412 00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:39,189 Maybe find a spot to stash the blood bag. 413 00:15:39,230 --> 00:15:40,565 - Copy that, partner. 414 00:15:48,573 --> 00:15:50,492 - Damn it. 415 00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:52,660 - Are you nervous for Rita? - Nah. 416 00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:54,120 I got this down: 417 00:15:54,162 --> 00:15:56,373 20 seconds to chit-chat, three-minute pitch, 418 00:15:56,414 --> 00:15:57,874 a minute and a half of questions, 419 00:15:57,916 --> 00:15:59,668 walk away with ten to spare. 420 00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,169 Always leave 'em wanting more. 421 00:16:01,211 --> 00:16:02,712 - But you know we're not getting five minutes. 422 00:16:02,754 --> 00:16:03,797 They cut us down to 60 seconds. 423 00:16:03,838 --> 00:16:04,756 - What? No, no, no. 424 00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:05,840 It's five minutes. 425 00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:07,175 I checked the website this morning. 426 00:16:07,217 --> 00:16:08,259 - I guess more people showed than they thought. 427 00:16:08,301 --> 00:16:10,387 Sold too many gold wristbands somehow. 428 00:16:13,348 --> 00:16:15,058 - What do you mean you're out of gold wristbands? 429 00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,352 - It's the last bag. 430 00:16:17,394 --> 00:16:18,728 - Well, what else you got? 431 00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:20,522 - I don't know... 432 00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:22,315 Got tees. Lanyards. 433 00:16:22,357 --> 00:16:23,608 I got a bunch of stuff leftover 434 00:16:23,650 --> 00:16:26,236 from the renewable energy trade show last week. 435 00:16:26,277 --> 00:16:27,445 - Renewable energy... 436 00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:32,367 - But isn't Platinum Tier the best? 437 00:16:32,409 --> 00:16:33,660 - Nope. Emerald Tier 438 00:16:33,702 --> 00:16:35,495 is the highest level-- higher than Platinum. 439 00:16:35,537 --> 00:16:37,288 - Then why isn't it listed on the website? 440 00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:38,748 - 'Cause then the media would find out. 441 00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:40,834 You know how Rodney feels about the haters in the media. 442 00:16:40,875 --> 00:16:42,043 Yeah, they're useless. 443 00:16:42,085 --> 00:16:44,004 They don't create anything. 444 00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:46,506 How much? 445 00:16:46,548 --> 00:16:48,216 - A thousand. 446 00:16:48,258 --> 00:16:49,467 - Fuck it. Let's do this. 447 00:16:52,220 --> 00:16:53,722 What does this slogan mean? "Go green." 448 00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:56,182 - Oh, that's just Rodney's private, personal mantra. 449 00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:57,475 Green as in money. 450 00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:58,476 Go get that money! 451 00:16:58,518 --> 00:16:59,894 Oh, fuck yeah! 452 00:16:59,936 --> 00:17:01,438 Go green, baby! - Go green! 453 00:17:03,023 --> 00:17:06,401 - Successful people are always doing five things at once. 454 00:17:06,443 --> 00:17:09,487 We don't just multitask. We omnitask. 455 00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:12,032 Right now, I'm talking to all of you, sure, 456 00:17:12,073 --> 00:17:15,952 but I'm also approving galleys for my new book. 457 00:17:15,994 --> 00:17:17,662 Oh, nope. These need work. 458 00:17:17,704 --> 00:17:19,122 - Yes, ma'am. 459 00:17:19,164 --> 00:17:20,415 - How do we cut through, though? 460 00:17:20,457 --> 00:17:21,499 How do we do it? 461 00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,001 How do we grab someone's attention 462 00:17:23,043 --> 00:17:24,085 and hold it? 463 00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:27,297 - Sorry. Oh, sorry. 464 00:17:27,339 --> 00:17:28,465 You already started. 465 00:17:28,506 --> 00:17:30,133 I was pushing, but it was a pull door. 466 00:17:30,175 --> 00:17:31,885 Sorry. Sorry. 467 00:17:31,926 --> 00:17:33,386 So sorry. Okay. 468 00:17:33,428 --> 00:17:34,220 Sorry. 469 00:17:34,262 --> 00:17:35,555 I'll just go over here. 470 00:17:35,597 --> 00:17:36,931 Sorry. 471 00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:39,768 It's all right. Business lady, so... 472 00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:42,937 - Half of you have air horns. Half of you don't. 473 00:17:42,979 --> 00:17:45,940 If you don't have an air horn, I want you to walk up 474 00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:49,152 to somebody who does, and I want you to tell them 475 00:17:49,194 --> 00:17:52,113 who you are and what you do. 476 00:17:52,155 --> 00:17:54,574 But I don't want small talk. 477 00:17:54,616 --> 00:17:56,618 I want large talk. 478 00:17:56,659 --> 00:17:58,078 What do I want? 479 00:17:58,119 --> 00:17:59,162 Large talk. 480 00:17:59,204 --> 00:18:00,705 - What the fuck do I want? 481 00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:03,041 - Large talk. - Fucking large talk! 482 00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:09,464 - If you do have an air horn, the second that person 483 00:18:09,506 --> 00:18:13,093 starts to bore you, I want you to blow it in their face. 484 00:18:13,134 --> 00:18:14,344 It's not rude. 485 00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:18,598 It's feedback, and all of you need it. 486 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:19,891 Here we go! 487 00:18:19,933 --> 00:18:21,351 - Hello! I'm Jillian. 488 00:18:21,393 --> 00:18:23,687 I'm--okay, large talk. 489 00:18:23,728 --> 00:18:24,896 My business partner and I 490 00:18:24,938 --> 00:18:28,191 are trying to start a saw palmetto farm-- 491 00:18:28,233 --> 00:18:29,818 - What's up? I'm Jillian. 492 00:18:29,859 --> 00:18:31,736 Did you know that prostate reduction is a million doll-- 493 00:18:32,946 --> 00:18:34,280 - Hey fucker! I'm Jillian. 494 00:18:34,322 --> 00:18:35,782 I'm a stone-cold bitch, 495 00:18:35,824 --> 00:18:37,701 and I wanna make a billion dollars by shrinking men's-- 496 00:18:38,910 --> 00:18:40,036 I'm Jillian. I'm a... 497 00:18:40,078 --> 00:18:41,204 tech investor-- 498 00:18:41,246 --> 00:18:43,039 Stock market person. 499 00:18:43,081 --> 00:18:44,874 Rich widow? 500 00:18:44,916 --> 00:18:46,292 Advertising. 501 00:18:46,334 --> 00:18:49,462 I'm a major player in the world of advertising... 502 00:18:49,504 --> 00:18:50,422 - Nice. 503 00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:54,092 - Oh, hi. 504 00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:55,969 I'm Jillian, by the way. 505 00:18:56,011 --> 00:18:57,679 I'm a stone-cold bitch. 506 00:18:57,721 --> 00:18:59,347 - Hi. I'm Nate. 507 00:18:59,389 --> 00:19:01,683 I'm in advertising too. That's why I didn't blow 508 00:19:01,725 --> 00:19:03,018 the horn in your face. 509 00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:06,062 Also, it seems needlessly cruel. 510 00:19:06,104 --> 00:19:07,355 - Produce for 2.30 a unit. 511 00:19:07,397 --> 00:19:08,565 It's on wholesale for 9.99. 512 00:19:08,606 --> 00:19:09,983 I just need an investment to help build it-- 513 00:19:10,025 --> 00:19:11,985 - Time's up. - Great job, Alvin. 514 00:19:12,027 --> 00:19:12,986 I love your energy. 515 00:19:13,028 --> 00:19:14,029 The idea's not for me, 516 00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:15,530 but you're gonna do fine. 517 00:19:15,572 --> 00:19:17,198 Next. 518 00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:20,785 - Clock starts now. 519 00:19:22,704 --> 00:19:23,997 - Hi, I'm Rita. 520 00:19:24,039 --> 00:19:25,540 - Hi. Craig Foster. 521 00:19:25,582 --> 00:19:27,917 - Oh, so nice to meet you, Craig Foster. 522 00:19:27,959 --> 00:19:29,210 What do you have for me today? 523 00:19:29,252 --> 00:19:30,920 - It's 4:00 a.m. in Miami. 524 00:19:30,962 --> 00:19:32,172 I'm wide awake. Why? 525 00:19:32,213 --> 00:19:34,632 I have to pee, again, and large prosta-- 526 00:19:34,674 --> 00:19:36,551 - I love your tie. 527 00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:38,261 - Thank you. It was my father's. 528 00:19:38,303 --> 00:19:41,348 - Oh, that is so sweet, and you know what? 529 00:19:41,389 --> 00:19:42,891 The reason that I mentioned the tie 530 00:19:42,932 --> 00:19:45,602 is because I have a summer cottage that I'm redecorating, 531 00:19:45,643 --> 00:19:49,022 and I painted the entry hall that exact color. 532 00:19:49,064 --> 00:19:50,565 - Oh wow. - I know, 533 00:19:50,607 --> 00:19:53,234 and everybody told me, "Rita, you're wrong about this one. 534 00:19:53,276 --> 00:19:55,570 It's gonna be too dark." But guess what. 535 00:19:55,612 --> 00:19:57,197 It's perfect. - Speaking of perfect, 536 00:19:57,238 --> 00:19:58,114 saw palmetto berries-- - You know what? 537 00:19:58,156 --> 00:19:59,282 Let me see this here. 538 00:19:59,324 --> 00:20:00,784 I want to show you a picture. Okay? 539 00:20:00,825 --> 00:20:02,786 'Cause it really is that exact color. 540 00:20:02,827 --> 00:20:04,662 - Saw palmetto berries are-- - Wait till you see this. 541 00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:06,498 - I believe you. - You have to see this, though, 542 00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:09,542 because really, it's so great in the hall, and-- 543 00:20:09,584 --> 00:20:10,877 Now wait a minute. Where is it? 544 00:20:10,919 --> 00:20:11,961 Hold on. - Time's up. 545 00:20:12,003 --> 00:20:13,213 - Oh... - But-- 546 00:20:13,254 --> 00:20:14,881 - Wait, I didn't show him the entry hall. 547 00:20:14,923 --> 00:20:16,466 - We really have to move along, Rita. 548 00:20:16,508 --> 00:20:18,134 - But-- - Great job, Craig. 549 00:20:18,176 --> 00:20:19,511 And I love your energy, 550 00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:21,846 Next! 551 00:20:27,936 --> 00:20:28,978 - So then I moved to the Zales campaign, 552 00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:30,188 and it's just the same shit. 553 00:20:30,230 --> 00:20:31,898 But my daddy owns the agency, 554 00:20:31,940 --> 00:20:33,817 and I'm sort of being groomed to take over, 555 00:20:33,858 --> 00:20:35,819 so it's like, what choice do I have? 556 00:20:35,860 --> 00:20:38,530 Which is why I came here, and see if I wanted to pivot, 557 00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:43,993 and... I realize now I have been talking for so long. 558 00:20:44,035 --> 00:20:45,995 I am so sorry. God! 559 00:20:46,037 --> 00:20:47,664 If I still had one of those little blowhorns, 560 00:20:47,706 --> 00:20:49,624 I'd blow it right in my goddamn face. 561 00:20:49,666 --> 00:20:51,626 - I actually stole one, if you'd like. 562 00:20:51,668 --> 00:20:54,295 I thought it would be helpful for scaring bats out of my... 563 00:20:54,337 --> 00:20:56,006 fixed basement. 564 00:20:56,047 --> 00:20:57,716 - So tell me about you. 565 00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,300 Like, what kind of advertising do you do? 566 00:20:59,342 --> 00:21:02,345 - I'm in billboards. 567 00:21:02,387 --> 00:21:05,015 - Oh, cool. What, like in Miami? 568 00:21:05,056 --> 00:21:06,307 - It's mobile billboards, 569 00:21:06,349 --> 00:21:08,685 the kind people tow behind their cars. 570 00:21:08,727 --> 00:21:10,061 - Oh. 571 00:21:10,103 --> 00:21:11,479 Is that lucrative, or...? 572 00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:13,606 - I own a fleet of them. 573 00:21:13,648 --> 00:21:16,067 - Oh, wow. So yeah, you're doing great. 574 00:21:16,109 --> 00:21:17,193 - Mm-hmm. 575 00:21:17,235 --> 00:21:19,237 - If you don't mind me asking, 576 00:21:19,279 --> 00:21:20,488 what are you doing here? 577 00:21:20,530 --> 00:21:21,740 You know, 'cause this whole thing-- 578 00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:23,742 it's not really for people who... 579 00:21:23,783 --> 00:21:25,035 who've have made it. 580 00:21:25,076 --> 00:21:27,412 - Oh, well, I'm actually looking to raise money, 581 00:21:27,454 --> 00:21:30,248 financial capital, to expand. 582 00:21:30,290 --> 00:21:32,208 - I was hoping you would say that. 583 00:21:32,250 --> 00:21:34,002 Uh, there's this guy. He's speaking, 584 00:21:34,044 --> 00:21:35,920 and I know him through my dad, 585 00:21:35,962 --> 00:21:39,507 and he invests in advertising platforms, so... 586 00:21:39,549 --> 00:21:42,135 maybe you wanna sit down with him... 587 00:21:42,177 --> 00:21:43,303 get a drink? 588 00:21:44,471 --> 00:21:46,139 Professionally. 589 00:21:46,181 --> 00:21:47,265 - Oh. - Of course. 590 00:21:47,307 --> 00:21:48,224 No, no, no. I'm not trying 591 00:21:48,266 --> 00:21:49,684 to set you up with him. 592 00:21:49,726 --> 00:21:52,812 I'm trying to set you up with me, if that was unclear. 593 00:21:52,854 --> 00:21:54,522 Ah, this could have been way smoother. 594 00:21:54,564 --> 00:21:56,399 - I thought it was really smooth. 595 00:22:11,039 --> 00:22:12,123 - Rita. 596 00:22:12,165 --> 00:22:14,209 - Oh, sorry-- restricted event. 597 00:22:14,250 --> 00:22:15,418 - Is this the private meet and greet? 598 00:22:15,460 --> 00:22:17,045 I'm supposed to have access. I'm Gold Tier. 599 00:22:17,087 --> 00:22:19,673 - No, that private meet and greet was at 1:00 p.m. 600 00:22:19,714 --> 00:22:21,549 This is the private jam session. 601 00:22:21,591 --> 00:22:23,343 They're different. It's Platinum Tier only. 602 00:22:25,053 --> 00:22:26,429 - Can I just say hi to Rita real quick? 603 00:22:26,471 --> 00:22:29,140 - Platinum Tier only. 604 00:22:31,810 --> 00:22:35,230 - One Platinum Tier wristband will be $400. 605 00:22:35,271 --> 00:22:36,981 - Now, could I also interest you in-- 606 00:22:37,023 --> 00:22:37,899 - Just take my fucking card. 607 00:22:39,651 --> 00:22:42,278 - Rodney is so driven, it's frightening. 608 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:43,738 I'm not kidding. 609 00:22:43,780 --> 00:22:47,409 I'm actually scared to be in the room alone with him. 610 00:22:47,450 --> 00:22:49,035 How cool is that, right? 611 00:22:49,077 --> 00:22:52,080 - Our flip-flops were the first ever bejeweled footwear 612 00:22:52,122 --> 00:22:55,291 endorsed by UFC. - Oh, okay. 613 00:22:55,333 --> 00:22:57,419 Hey, Craig with the great tie. 614 00:22:59,004 --> 00:23:00,672 I am so sorry about earlier. 615 00:23:00,714 --> 00:23:02,090 That was just awful of me, 616 00:23:02,132 --> 00:23:04,718 wasting all your time talking about my cottage. 617 00:23:04,759 --> 00:23:05,969 So what was your pitch again? 618 00:23:06,011 --> 00:23:07,721 Something about saw palmetto berries... 619 00:23:07,762 --> 00:23:09,264 - You remembered! Yeah. 620 00:23:09,305 --> 00:23:10,598 Okay, well like I was saying, 621 00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:11,891 these berries can actually shrink-- 622 00:23:11,933 --> 00:23:13,685 - Hey bro. I wanna talk to Rita now. 623 00:23:13,727 --> 00:23:15,770 - Okay, well, we're in the middle of something. 624 00:23:15,812 --> 00:23:16,813 - Too bad. 625 00:23:16,855 --> 00:23:17,856 - I'm Platinum. 626 00:23:17,897 --> 00:23:19,315 - Yeah, you're Platinum. 627 00:23:19,357 --> 00:23:20,483 I'm Emerald. - Emerald? 628 00:23:20,525 --> 00:23:21,985 - This gives me priority. 629 00:23:22,027 --> 00:23:24,487 I'm the priority. - I'm also Emerald Tier. 630 00:23:24,529 --> 00:23:25,989 I am also priority. 631 00:23:26,031 --> 00:23:27,866 - The security guard said this was Platinum. 632 00:23:27,907 --> 00:23:29,909 - Emerald Tier is the most elite level. 633 00:23:29,951 --> 00:23:32,454 You are not in Rodney's inner circle. 634 00:23:32,495 --> 00:23:34,039 - Rita... - If these folks purchased 635 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:35,790 Emerald Tier, then, you know, 636 00:23:35,832 --> 00:23:37,500 it's only fair that I jam with them. 637 00:23:37,542 --> 00:23:38,752 I'm sorry. - Can we do it after? 638 00:23:38,793 --> 00:23:39,836 - But I have my big speech, 639 00:23:39,878 --> 00:23:41,296 so I have to get to the green room. 640 00:23:41,338 --> 00:23:43,506 But I can have my assistant give you an email address. 641 00:23:43,548 --> 00:23:46,384 - Give it up, man. You shouldn't even be here. 642 00:23:46,426 --> 00:23:47,969 Go green! 643 00:23:48,011 --> 00:23:48,970 Go green! 644 00:23:49,012 --> 00:23:51,639 Go green! 645 00:23:51,681 --> 00:23:53,600 - I'm kind of an advertising disruptor 646 00:23:53,641 --> 00:23:55,060 in the viral space, so... 647 00:23:55,101 --> 00:23:58,313 billboard cars aren't really my thing. 648 00:23:58,355 --> 00:23:59,981 But Nate says I have to meet you, 649 00:24:00,023 --> 00:24:02,692 and Nate's daddy's pretty important, so... 650 00:24:04,569 --> 00:24:06,946 Here I stand. What'chu got? 651 00:24:06,988 --> 00:24:11,493 - Um, well, I have my fleet, and I'm looking to expand. 652 00:24:11,534 --> 00:24:13,620 I need financial capital. 653 00:24:14,954 --> 00:24:17,123 - A'ight. What's your overhead? 654 00:24:17,165 --> 00:24:18,249 How much you pay your drivers? 655 00:24:18,291 --> 00:24:19,751 - Oh, I pay them very little, 656 00:24:19,793 --> 00:24:21,670 not even enough to cover gas. 657 00:24:21,711 --> 00:24:23,004 - See? What'd I tell you? 658 00:24:23,046 --> 00:24:24,589 She's a boss. 659 00:24:24,631 --> 00:24:27,842 - I can't believe you can even find anyone to take that job. 660 00:24:27,884 --> 00:24:29,636 - Well, there are other perks. 661 00:24:29,678 --> 00:24:31,346 They can set their own hours. 662 00:24:31,388 --> 00:24:33,223 They can do other jobs as they drive. 663 00:24:33,264 --> 00:24:36,184 I think some of them even sleep in the billboards. 664 00:24:36,226 --> 00:24:39,771 - What? That is nasty. 665 00:24:39,813 --> 00:24:41,773 Where do they even shower? 666 00:24:41,815 --> 00:24:43,942 - I can't even imagine. 667 00:24:43,983 --> 00:24:48,029 I guess they must just take a whore's bath. 668 00:24:48,071 --> 00:24:50,240 - A whore's bath? 669 00:24:50,281 --> 00:24:53,034 - Yeah, you know, when someone takes a wet washcloth 670 00:24:53,076 --> 00:24:55,078 to their pits and private parts. 671 00:24:56,705 --> 00:24:58,790 - So you're kind of like a slumlord. 672 00:24:58,832 --> 00:25:00,583 - Oh, she's not a slumlord. 673 00:25:00,625 --> 00:25:02,252 I mean, there's just a lot of losers out there, 674 00:25:02,293 --> 00:25:04,045 and she's smart. 675 00:25:04,087 --> 00:25:05,714 Sorry, I'm sure not everyone that works 676 00:25:05,755 --> 00:25:07,048 for you is, like, a loser. 677 00:25:07,090 --> 00:25:08,133 - Yes, they are. 678 00:25:08,174 --> 00:25:09,718 They're desperate losers. 679 00:25:09,759 --> 00:25:11,678 You'd be so grossed out if you met them. 680 00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:12,721 - See, that's a mistake. 681 00:25:12,762 --> 00:25:14,305 Never meet those people. 682 00:25:14,347 --> 00:25:15,890 - Yeah, those people... 683 00:25:15,932 --> 00:25:18,059 Um, I'll actually be right back. 684 00:25:18,101 --> 00:25:20,895 I have a shit-ton of phone calls to take. 685 00:25:20,937 --> 00:25:23,773 - Hell yeah, hustla. Do your thang! 686 00:25:25,900 --> 00:25:28,069 - Zay! 687 00:25:28,111 --> 00:25:29,320 Zay! 688 00:25:29,362 --> 00:25:31,156 Zay. 689 00:25:31,197 --> 00:25:32,115 Come on. We're leaving. 690 00:25:32,157 --> 00:25:33,491 - Wait, what? - You were right. 691 00:25:33,533 --> 00:25:35,285 This conference is a scam. I'm dumb for attending. 692 00:25:35,326 --> 00:25:36,327 - What the fuck happened to you? 693 00:25:36,369 --> 00:25:37,495 - I didn't get to pitch to Rita. 694 00:25:37,537 --> 00:25:38,538 I'm never gonna get to pitch to Rita. 695 00:25:38,580 --> 00:25:40,165 I wasted $1,000. 696 00:25:40,206 --> 00:25:41,416 - Plus 40 for that lanyard. 697 00:25:41,458 --> 00:25:42,792 - Plus 40 for the fucking lanyard. 698 00:25:42,834 --> 00:25:43,960 - Wait, hold up. Hold up. 699 00:25:44,002 --> 00:25:46,171 Your boy Zay is formulatin' a plan. 700 00:25:46,212 --> 00:25:47,088 Where's Rita at right now? 701 00:25:47,130 --> 00:25:48,548 - Green room. Speakers only. 702 00:25:48,590 --> 00:25:49,924 Restricted access. 703 00:25:49,966 --> 00:25:52,427 - I mean... restricted for some people. 704 00:25:56,681 --> 00:25:59,267 - Teachers give me big bridesmaid energy. 705 00:25:59,309 --> 00:26:02,187 They're just not stars. You know what I mean? 706 00:26:02,228 --> 00:26:03,646 - Rita. - Craig. 707 00:26:03,688 --> 00:26:05,065 - Sorry to barge in on you like this, 708 00:26:05,106 --> 00:26:06,900 but I thought I could pitch you my business now. 709 00:26:06,941 --> 00:26:08,818 - You can't be in here. - I just need three minutes. 710 00:26:08,860 --> 00:26:10,987 - This is for featured speakers only. 711 00:26:11,029 --> 00:26:12,030 Security! 712 00:26:12,072 --> 00:26:14,324 - Rita, please... 713 00:26:14,366 --> 00:26:16,201 Do you know where I was when I woke up this morning? 714 00:26:16,242 --> 00:26:18,703 Excuse me! - It's okay. 715 00:26:18,745 --> 00:26:22,123 - A 24-hour gym, because that's my home now. 716 00:26:22,165 --> 00:26:23,458 I have no car. 717 00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:24,626 I work at a swamp. 718 00:26:24,668 --> 00:26:25,794 I can't use my left hand 719 00:26:25,835 --> 00:26:27,712 because I nailed a python to it. 720 00:26:27,754 --> 00:26:28,963 That's my job, by the way. 721 00:26:29,005 --> 00:26:31,007 I get bit by snakes for a living. 722 00:26:31,049 --> 00:26:32,676 - I'm not investing in this pitch. 723 00:26:32,717 --> 00:26:36,638 It's sad and boring, and for that reason, I'm out. 724 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:38,848 - I'm not pitching, Prada Lamonca! 725 00:26:38,890 --> 00:26:43,228 I'm just trying to explain, I don't have much right now, 726 00:26:43,269 --> 00:26:44,896 and yet I still spent $1,000 727 00:26:44,938 --> 00:26:47,399 for the privilege to come to this. 728 00:26:47,440 --> 00:26:49,484 $1,000 to stand in front of you. 729 00:26:49,526 --> 00:26:53,196 $1,000 matters to me. The least you can do is listen. 730 00:26:55,198 --> 00:26:58,159 - Maybe I'm not the only one who needs to hear this. 731 00:26:58,201 --> 00:26:59,744 - What? 732 00:26:59,786 --> 00:27:01,955 - So the teleprompter is all loaded up 733 00:27:01,996 --> 00:27:04,165 with the talk that I was gonna give today. 734 00:27:04,207 --> 00:27:06,167 But I don't wanna give that talk anymore, 735 00:27:06,209 --> 00:27:08,253 because I met someone, 736 00:27:08,294 --> 00:27:12,882 and I just have to share his story with all of you. 737 00:27:12,924 --> 00:27:14,342 Craig! 738 00:27:14,384 --> 00:27:16,136 Come on out here. 739 00:27:16,177 --> 00:27:18,221 You. 740 00:27:18,263 --> 00:27:19,889 Come on out here. 741 00:27:19,931 --> 00:27:22,600 Help me bring him out to the stage, y'all. 742 00:27:22,642 --> 00:27:24,686 Come on, Craig. 743 00:27:24,728 --> 00:27:26,354 Come on and see your people! 744 00:27:26,396 --> 00:27:28,732 Look out into the crowd. 745 00:27:28,773 --> 00:27:32,277 Now this, ladies and gentlemen, is Craig Foster. 746 00:27:32,318 --> 00:27:35,363 Do you know what he told me backstage? 747 00:27:35,405 --> 00:27:39,868 Every day, he gets up and hunts pythons in the Everglades. 748 00:27:39,909 --> 00:27:41,995 That's right. 749 00:27:42,037 --> 00:27:46,082 He faces danger. He stares down death 750 00:27:46,124 --> 00:27:48,752 all to make his American dream come true. 751 00:27:48,793 --> 00:27:52,380 I learned firsthand just how relentless he is. 752 00:27:52,422 --> 00:27:53,757 Nothing can stop this man. 753 00:27:53,798 --> 00:27:57,093 Now, if all of you had 754 00:27:57,135 --> 00:28:00,680 the same fire burning inside you that Craig does, 755 00:28:00,722 --> 00:28:02,599 I'd be speaking to an empty room today, 756 00:28:02,640 --> 00:28:05,518 because everybody in here would already be 757 00:28:05,560 --> 00:28:06,728 a millionaire. 758 00:28:06,770 --> 00:28:08,772 That's right. 759 00:28:08,813 --> 00:28:12,317 So come on, and let's give it up for Craig. 760 00:28:15,362 --> 00:28:16,905 Oh, it's your day now. 761 00:28:16,946 --> 00:28:19,616 Craig! Craig! Craig! 762 00:28:19,657 --> 00:28:21,034 - I like it! 763 00:28:21,076 --> 00:28:22,118 I like it! 764 00:28:25,914 --> 00:28:29,584 - That was incredible. I'm still vibratin'. 765 00:28:29,626 --> 00:28:30,752 Thank you so much. 766 00:28:30,794 --> 00:28:31,961 - Oh no. Thank you. 767 00:28:32,003 --> 00:28:33,713 And you were great up there. 768 00:28:33,755 --> 00:28:35,757 Um, can I get that email from you 769 00:28:35,799 --> 00:28:37,217 so we could set a time to follow up? 770 00:28:37,258 --> 00:28:39,260 I never got to actually pitch my idea. 771 00:28:39,302 --> 00:28:40,970 - Oh, you know what? About that... 772 00:28:41,012 --> 00:28:43,431 I totally forgot. I'm already invested 773 00:28:43,473 --> 00:28:45,266 in the nighttime urination space. 774 00:28:45,308 --> 00:28:46,393 It's a wearable device 775 00:28:46,434 --> 00:28:48,269 that collects pee while you sleep, so-- 776 00:28:48,311 --> 00:28:50,605 think smart diaper 2.0. 777 00:28:50,647 --> 00:28:52,941 It'd be a conflict of interest for me to invest with you. 778 00:28:52,982 --> 00:28:55,568 - Oh. - But hey! 779 00:28:55,610 --> 00:28:57,070 We're competitors now. 780 00:28:57,112 --> 00:28:58,571 That's pretty cool, right? 781 00:28:58,613 --> 00:29:01,241 Oh, you know what? 782 00:29:01,282 --> 00:29:04,494 Craig, I want you to know how inspiring it was 783 00:29:04,536 --> 00:29:06,329 to hear about your struggle. 784 00:29:06,371 --> 00:29:08,623 Never stop struggling, okay? 785 00:29:13,211 --> 00:29:14,462 Promise me. 786 00:29:14,504 --> 00:29:15,839 You'll never stop struggling. 787 00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:20,301 - Never stop struggling? 788 00:29:30,228 --> 00:29:32,439 - Got your texts. - Oh, yeah. 789 00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:34,399 I just wanted to let you know I'm leaving. 790 00:29:34,441 --> 00:29:35,900 - Tough day, Cinderella? 791 00:29:35,942 --> 00:29:38,778 - Yeah, you know, it wasn't what I thought it would be. 792 00:29:38,820 --> 00:29:41,823 Guess I learnt a lot. 793 00:29:41,865 --> 00:29:44,159 - Guess I learned a lot too. 794 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,369 Mind giving me a ride home? - Of course. 795 00:29:48,204 --> 00:29:51,124 Did you have a hundred air horns blown in your face? 796 00:29:51,166 --> 00:29:53,126 Because that happened to me. 797 00:29:53,168 --> 00:29:55,170 - At least you got in free. 798 00:29:55,211 --> 00:29:57,130 I paid $1,000 for a ten-year-old girl 799 00:29:57,172 --> 00:30:00,008 to insult my face and body. - What? 800 00:30:00,050 --> 00:30:02,927 You have a very nice face and body. 801 00:30:02,969 --> 00:30:04,471 - I wasn't saying that so you'd compliment me, 802 00:30:04,512 --> 00:30:07,140 but boy, I needed to hear that. 803 00:30:09,559 --> 00:30:10,727 - Hey, yo Nick! 804 00:30:18,318 --> 00:30:20,737 - Hey Isaiah Foster? 805 00:30:20,779 --> 00:30:23,365 - Oh, hey. - Yeah, that's him. 806 00:30:26,159 --> 00:30:27,744 - What the fuck? You get off-- 807 00:30:27,786 --> 00:30:30,538 No, no, no, no! Fuck you! 808 00:30:30,580 --> 00:30:31,748 - Great work, guys. 809 00:30:31,790 --> 00:30:33,875 Throw me some fucking nines. 810 00:32:01,254 --> 00:32:02,881 - Not a doctor. Shh.