1 00:00:30,904 --> 00:00:32,508 (HYDRAULIC BRAKES HISS) 2 00:00:32,543 --> 00:00:34,543 (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING) 3 00:00:54,664 --> 00:00:56,499 (MUSIC CONTINUES) 4 00:00:58,998 --> 00:01:00,899 MAN: Like we discussed yesterday, 5 00:01:00,934 --> 00:01:05,871 I really want you all to focus on topic sentences more. 6 00:01:05,906 --> 00:01:08,379 Too many of you are rushing into examples 7 00:01:08,414 --> 00:01:09,974 in your body paragraphs. 8 00:01:10,009 --> 00:01:11,844 It'd be good for everyone to review 9 00:01:11,879 --> 00:01:13,780 the paragraph structure PDF I sent you 10 00:01:13,815 --> 00:01:15,320 a few weeks ago. 11 00:01:15,355 --> 00:01:18,917 I know these rules can feel constraining. 12 00:01:18,952 --> 00:01:22,261 But remember, the point of this course 13 00:01:22,296 --> 00:01:26,430 is to learn how to write clearly and persuasively. 14 00:01:26,465 --> 00:01:29,763 That's how you can effectively communicate your ideas. 15 00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:30,962 (MESSAGE ALERT PINGS) 16 00:01:30,997 --> 00:01:32,430 (MAN CHUCKLES) 17 00:01:32,465 --> 00:01:35,538 Chris, I imagine that was supposed to be a private chat 18 00:01:35,573 --> 00:01:38,376 that you sent to the whole class. Well done. 19 00:01:38,411 --> 00:01:42,578 And, yes, the camera on my laptop still doesn't work. 20 00:01:42,613 --> 00:01:44,280 Believe me, you're not missing much. 21 00:01:44,315 --> 00:01:47,418 Oh, and for those of you who still haven't given me paper three, 22 00:01:47,453 --> 00:01:50,322 I need it by Wednesday, no exceptions. 23 00:01:51,391 --> 00:01:53,158 And remember, 24 00:01:53,193 --> 00:01:56,394 -the more you revise these essays, the better. - (WAVES CRASHING) 25 00:01:56,429 --> 00:01:57,956 The more you change, 26 00:01:57,991 --> 00:02:00,827 chances are you'll express your thoughts and ideas 27 00:02:00,862 --> 00:02:02,466 more clearly and persuasively. 28 00:02:03,403 --> 00:02:04,435 All right? 29 00:02:04,998 --> 00:02:06,470 (WAVE CRASHED LOUDLY) 30 00:02:13,446 --> 00:02:14,676 (MAN GRUNTS) 31 00:02:14,711 --> 00:02:16,381 (RAIN PATTERING) 32 00:02:20,453 --> 00:02:21,551 (GROANS) 33 00:02:22,686 --> 00:02:26,820 (HEAVY BREATHING) (CONTINUES GRUNTING) 34 00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:29,328 (MEN ON VIDEO BREATHING HEAVILY) 35 00:02:29,363 --> 00:02:32,397 (MAN GRUNTS) (STROKING RAPIDLY) 36 00:02:32,432 --> 00:02:33,563 Oh! 37 00:02:33,598 --> 00:02:35,895 (GRUNTING) 38 00:02:36,667 --> 00:02:40,405 (GRUNTING IN PAIN) 39 00:02:41,001 --> 00:02:45,674 (GRUNTING LABORIOUSLY) 40 00:02:45,709 --> 00:02:47,709 (COUGHS, BREATHES HEAVILY) 41 00:02:49,482 --> 00:02:54,551 (GASPING AND COUGHING) 42 00:02:54,586 --> 00:02:59,490 "Moby Dick... (WHEEZES) In the amazing book, Moby..." (GROANS) 43 00:02:59,525 --> 00:03:01,525 (KNOCK AT DOOR) Liz? 44 00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:03,054 (PANTS) (KNOCKING CONTINUES) 45 00:03:03,089 --> 00:03:06,090 Just use your key, (WHEEZES) open the door! 46 00:03:08,061 --> 00:03:09,995 (GASPS) Oh, my God. 47 00:03:10,030 --> 00:03:12,030 Who are you? (GROANS IN PAIN) 48 00:03:12,065 --> 00:03:15,132 Gosh, are you okay? Should I call an ambulance? I should call an am... 49 00:03:15,167 --> 00:03:17,673 (MEN PANTING) (CONTINUES GROANING) 50 00:03:19,006 --> 00:03:20,379 Read this to me. Do you have a phone? 51 00:03:20,414 --> 00:03:21,446 My phone's dead, I need to... 52 00:03:21,481 --> 00:03:22,975 Please just read it! Okay! 53 00:03:24,176 --> 00:03:25,648 (GRUNTS) Okay. 54 00:03:25,683 --> 00:03:27,183 (GROANS) 55 00:03:27,218 --> 00:03:29,146 "In the amazing book, Moby Dick, by the author, Herman Melville, 56 00:03:29,181 --> 00:03:31,621 "the author recounts his story of being at sea. 57 00:03:31,656 --> 00:03:34,052 "In the first part of his book, the author, calling himself Ishmael, 58 00:03:34,087 --> 00:03:35,153 "is in a small seaside town, 59 00:03:35,188 --> 00:03:37,957 "and he is sharing a bed with a man named Queequeg." 60 00:03:37,992 --> 00:03:39,156 What is this? Why am I reading this? 61 00:03:39,191 --> 00:03:41,598 I need to... Just read any of it! 62 00:03:41,633 --> 00:03:43,897 "And I felt saddest of all when I read the boring chapters 63 00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:45,198 "that were only descriptions of whales, 64 00:03:45,234 --> 00:03:47,505 "because I knew that the author was just trying to save us 65 00:03:47,540 --> 00:03:48,573 "from his own sad story..." 66 00:03:48,608 --> 00:03:50,409 (GASPING) Sad story. "...just for a little while." 67 00:03:50,444 --> 00:03:51,610 Just for a little while. 68 00:03:51,645 --> 00:03:53,643 "This book made me think about my own life... (WHEEZES) 69 00:03:53,678 --> 00:03:55,513 "...and then it made me feel glad for my..." 70 00:03:55,548 --> 00:03:57,878 (PANTING) 71 00:03:57,913 --> 00:04:00,584 Did that help? (SIGHS) 72 00:04:00,619 --> 00:04:02,487 Look, do you have a phone? My phone is dead. 73 00:04:02,522 --> 00:04:04,115 I need to call an ambulance. 74 00:04:04,150 --> 00:04:07,118 You need help. I don't go to hospitals. 75 00:04:07,153 --> 00:04:10,088 I can't help you, I don't... I don't go to hospitals. 76 00:04:11,498 --> 00:04:15,093 I am sorry, um... You can go. 77 00:04:15,128 --> 00:04:16,732 Thank you for reading that to me. 78 00:04:22,806 --> 00:04:24,003 Are you sure you're okay? 79 00:04:26,205 --> 00:04:27,908 I'm sorry, who are you? 80 00:04:29,582 --> 00:04:31,076 Are you acquainted with the Gospel of Jesus Christ? 81 00:04:31,111 --> 00:04:34,178 What? I'm sharing Christ's message of love, 82 00:04:34,213 --> 00:04:36,048 and I'm showing people... (SIGHING) Oh. 83 00:04:36,083 --> 00:04:37,588 Think I should call my friend. 84 00:04:37,623 --> 00:04:40,723 She's a nurse, she takes care of me. 85 00:04:40,758 --> 00:04:44,089 Yeah. Yeah, I'll go. Sorry to bother you. Wait. 86 00:04:45,631 --> 00:04:47,026 My phone fell under there, can you... 87 00:04:50,702 --> 00:04:51,833 Yeah, sure. 88 00:04:54,574 --> 00:04:55,771 (SIGHS) 89 00:05:02,780 --> 00:05:03,911 (SIGHS) Here it is. 90 00:05:03,946 --> 00:05:04,945 (GROANS IN PAIN) 91 00:05:09,083 --> 00:05:10,654 (MAN GRUNTS) 92 00:05:10,689 --> 00:05:12,491 Hey, listen, I don't know what's gonna happen 93 00:05:12,526 --> 00:05:14,152 in the next few minutes. 94 00:05:14,187 --> 00:05:16,891 If you don't mind, could you... (GRUNTS) 95 00:05:16,926 --> 00:05:19,025 Yeah. Yeah, of course. Thank you. 96 00:05:20,633 --> 00:05:21,995 (PHONE LINE RINGING) 97 00:05:24,703 --> 00:05:26,934 (AUTOMATED VOICE SPEAKING) It's Liz. I'm not around. Leave a message. 98 00:05:29,301 --> 00:05:31,675 What was that thing that you had me read to you? 99 00:05:33,206 --> 00:05:34,205 It's an essay. 100 00:05:35,076 --> 00:05:36,482 It's my job. 101 00:05:37,309 --> 00:05:39,650 I teach online college courses. 102 00:05:39,685 --> 00:05:41,047 But why did you have me read it to you? 103 00:05:45,317 --> 00:05:46,723 Because I thought I was dying. 104 00:05:46,758 --> 00:05:48,956 And I wanted to hear it one last time. 105 00:05:53,259 --> 00:05:55,061 (VELCRO RIPS) 106 00:05:55,096 --> 00:05:56,964 You should have called an ambulance. 107 00:05:56,999 --> 00:05:58,999 With no health insurance? 108 00:05:59,034 --> 00:06:00,935 Being in debt is better than being dead. 109 00:06:01,740 --> 00:06:02,739 What's wrong with you? 110 00:06:03,940 --> 00:06:05,775 Why is there a missionary here? 111 00:06:06,844 --> 00:06:09,207 Someone left the door unlocked. 112 00:06:09,242 --> 00:06:10,879 I left after you fell asleep earlier, 113 00:06:12,047 --> 00:06:13,145 I must've forgotten. 114 00:06:14,918 --> 00:06:16,951 Good thing, too. If I hadn't, you might have... 115 00:06:16,986 --> 00:06:18,315 Liz, I don't like it when you... 116 00:06:18,350 --> 00:06:20,559 Okay, okay. I just hate the thought 117 00:06:20,594 --> 00:06:23,023 of you being sealed up in this place when I'm not here. 118 00:06:23,058 --> 00:06:25,190 (PUMPING SPHYGMOMANOMETER BULB) Now shut up, I'm trying to... 119 00:06:30,934 --> 00:06:33,132 (RELEASES PRESSURE) (AIR HISSING) 120 00:06:34,707 --> 00:06:35,937 What? Hush. 121 00:06:40,944 --> 00:06:42,075 Tell me what you felt. 122 00:06:42,814 --> 00:06:44,880 Pain, in my chest. 123 00:06:44,915 --> 00:06:46,013 Hard to breathe. 124 00:06:46,983 --> 00:06:48,147 I couldn't intake air. 125 00:06:49,381 --> 00:06:51,348 (RIPS VELCRO) 126 00:06:51,383 --> 00:06:54,021 How are you sleeping? I'm not, really. 127 00:06:57,290 --> 00:06:58,630 Lean forward. 128 00:07:00,700 --> 00:07:01,864 (SIGHS) 129 00:07:02,801 --> 00:07:03,932 (MAN WHEEZES) 130 00:07:06,167 --> 00:07:07,837 You're wheezing. 131 00:07:07,872 --> 00:07:09,806 I always wheeze, Liz. 132 00:07:09,841 --> 00:07:11,038 You're wheezing more. 133 00:07:11,645 --> 00:07:12,941 Deep breath. 134 00:07:12,976 --> 00:07:15,581 (BREATHES DEEPLY WITH DIFFICULTY) 135 00:07:16,947 --> 00:07:18,749 That hurt? 136 00:07:18,784 --> 00:07:19,849 What was my blood pressure? 137 00:07:22,051 --> 00:07:24,117 Two-hundred and thirty-eight over 134. 138 00:07:30,026 --> 00:07:31,630 (CHUCKLING) Oh. 139 00:07:31,665 --> 00:07:32,763 Yeah. "Oh." 140 00:07:34,734 --> 00:07:35,733 (SIGHS) 141 00:07:36,230 --> 00:07:37,496 Hey, could you... 142 00:07:37,532 --> 00:07:39,869 I haven't been to the bathroom all day, I'm ready to explode. 143 00:07:52,114 --> 00:07:53,212 (GRUNTS) 144 00:07:54,985 --> 00:07:56,721 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 145 00:08:06,392 --> 00:08:08,029 (DRAWS CURTAIN) (LIGHT SWITCH CLICKS) 146 00:08:15,137 --> 00:08:16,708 (TRASH CAN LID CLOSES) 147 00:08:16,743 --> 00:08:18,743 (SIGHS) 148 00:08:18,778 --> 00:08:20,646 (MAN GRUNTS) LIZ: You need help in there? 149 00:08:21,715 --> 00:08:23,275 MAN: No, I'm fine. Sorry. 150 00:08:24,080 --> 00:08:25,684 What are you sorry about? 151 00:08:25,719 --> 00:08:28,885 I'm sorry. I don't know. Just sorry. 152 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:30,249 MISSIONARY: I should go. LIZ: Thank you. 153 00:08:31,318 --> 00:08:33,318 You must be from New Life. 154 00:08:33,353 --> 00:08:35,188 You know Doug, from the church council? 155 00:08:36,356 --> 00:08:38,092 Yeah, I think so? 156 00:08:38,127 --> 00:08:39,423 I'm not entirely sure. 157 00:08:39,458 --> 00:08:40,699 I'm sort of new here, so... 158 00:08:41,097 --> 00:08:42,162 He's my dad. 159 00:08:44,133 --> 00:08:46,364 Doug and Cindy adopted me when I was a baby. 160 00:08:46,399 --> 00:08:47,937 Oh, that's great. 161 00:08:47,972 --> 00:08:49,873 I've never seen you there before, but, 162 00:08:49,908 --> 00:08:51,171 again I'm sort of new, so... 163 00:08:51,206 --> 00:08:53,745 (SIGHS) Fucking hate New Life. Oh. 164 00:08:53,780 --> 00:08:55,080 My dad forced me to go when I was a kid. 165 00:08:55,115 --> 00:08:59,047 It was awful, growing up with all that "end times" bullshit. 166 00:09:00,281 --> 00:09:02,281 (SIGHS) You're young. 167 00:09:03,350 --> 00:09:04,481 Why the hell would you want to believe 168 00:09:04,516 --> 00:09:06,087 that the world is about to end? 169 00:09:07,453 --> 00:09:09,893 I believe that when Christ returns, 170 00:09:09,928 --> 00:09:11,158 it's gonna be beautiful. 171 00:09:14,933 --> 00:09:16,064 Look, you can go. 172 00:09:17,529 --> 00:09:19,397 I know Charlie appreciates the help, 173 00:09:19,432 --> 00:09:22,070 but if you're here to convert him... 174 00:09:22,105 --> 00:09:23,302 Oh, we don't convert, 175 00:09:23,337 --> 00:09:24,303 our message is a message of hope 176 00:09:24,338 --> 00:09:27,339 for people of all... LIZ: People of all faiths. 177 00:09:27,374 --> 00:09:30,848 I know. You're sweet. (CLICKS LIGHTER) But... 178 00:09:33,853 --> 00:09:34,952 (SIGHS) 179 00:09:34,988 --> 00:09:37,052 Believe me, he doesn't want to hear about New Life. 180 00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:40,286 Why? 181 00:09:40,321 --> 00:09:41,958 Because it's caused him a lot of pain. 182 00:09:42,994 --> 00:09:43,993 How? 183 00:09:47,801 --> 00:09:48,800 It killed his boyfriend. 184 00:09:50,529 --> 00:09:52,067 (TOILET FLUSHES) 185 00:09:54,500 --> 00:09:56,500 You're saying the church... (SIGHS) 186 00:09:57,569 --> 00:10:00,108 Killed Charlie's boyfriend, yes. 187 00:10:01,276 --> 00:10:03,144 And I should add that New Life 188 00:10:03,179 --> 00:10:05,377 has caused me a lot of pain in my life. 189 00:10:05,412 --> 00:10:08,017 So, we don't need you coming over here, 190 00:10:08,052 --> 00:10:10,184 especially not now, not this week. 191 00:10:11,418 --> 00:10:13,088 Why? 192 00:10:13,123 --> 00:10:15,057 Because he probably won't be here next week. 193 00:10:15,928 --> 00:10:17,356 Where's he going? 194 00:10:17,391 --> 00:10:19,490 I'm sorry you had to come over, Liz. 195 00:10:20,867 --> 00:10:22,130 No, it's okay. 196 00:10:22,165 --> 00:10:25,034 I'm sorry that I always think I'm dying. 197 00:10:25,069 --> 00:10:28,202 Charlie, your blood pressure is 238 over 134. 198 00:10:28,237 --> 00:10:30,303 I'm sorry. Go to the hospital. 199 00:10:30,338 --> 00:10:32,107 I'm sorry. Stop saying you're sorry. 200 00:10:32,142 --> 00:10:33,339 Go to the hospital. 201 00:10:34,441 --> 00:10:36,045 You have congestive heart failure. 202 00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:37,343 If you don't go to the hospital, 203 00:10:37,378 --> 00:10:38,410 you'll be dead by the weekend. 204 00:10:40,183 --> 00:10:42,051 (STERNLY) You will die. 205 00:10:44,055 --> 00:10:45,318 CHARLIE: Well, then, I better get to work 206 00:10:45,353 --> 00:10:46,924 because I have a lot of essays this week. 207 00:10:46,959 --> 00:10:48,387 God damn it! 208 00:10:48,422 --> 00:10:51,830 I know. I'm sorry, I'm an awful person. I know. 209 00:10:53,262 --> 00:10:54,492 I'm sorry. 210 00:10:54,527 --> 00:10:55,993 (GRUNTS, PANTS) 211 00:10:56,029 --> 00:10:58,232 Did you still want to hear about Christ's message of love and salvation? 212 00:10:58,267 --> 00:10:59,365 No, he does not! 213 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:00,399 MISSIONARY: Okay. Okay. 214 00:11:01,237 --> 00:11:02,236 I'll go. 215 00:11:04,471 --> 00:11:05,337 I still don't understand 216 00:11:05,372 --> 00:11:07,010 why you had me read that essay to you. 217 00:11:08,244 --> 00:11:09,848 It's a really good essay. 218 00:11:12,116 --> 00:11:14,017 LIZ: Goodbye. (CLOSES DOOR) 219 00:11:16,285 --> 00:11:18,890 Charlie, you have to go to the hospital. This has gone way too far. 220 00:11:18,925 --> 00:11:22,190 And rack up tens of thousands of dollars in hospital bills 221 00:11:22,225 --> 00:11:24,555 I'll never be able to pay back, ever. 222 00:11:24,590 --> 00:11:26,491 This affects me too, you know? 223 00:11:29,595 --> 00:11:30,594 You're my friend. 224 00:11:32,301 --> 00:11:33,300 I know. 225 00:11:35,139 --> 00:11:36,171 I'm sorry. 226 00:11:36,206 --> 00:11:37,339 You say you're sorry one more time, 227 00:11:37,374 --> 00:11:39,537 I will shove a knife right into you, I swear to God! 228 00:11:39,572 --> 00:11:41,913 Go ahead, what's it gonna do? 229 00:11:41,948 --> 00:11:43,409 My internal organs are two feet in, at least. 230 00:11:46,645 --> 00:11:48,612 (LAUGHING) 231 00:11:50,154 --> 00:11:51,384 (COUGHS) 232 00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:52,418 (WHIMPERS PLAYFULLY) 233 00:11:59,999 --> 00:12:01,592 I've been telling you this would happen. 234 00:12:01,627 --> 00:12:02,934 (SIGHS) I know. 235 00:12:05,532 --> 00:12:07,499 Haven't I been telling you? You have. 236 00:12:17,709 --> 00:12:20,116 NEWSCASTER 1: ...a new GOP presidential primary. 237 00:12:20,151 --> 00:12:21,851 However, they say absentee ballots 238 00:12:21,886 --> 00:12:24,351 are the lowest they've seen in recent history. NEWSCASTER 2: That's not good. 239 00:12:24,386 --> 00:12:26,452 NEWSCASTER 3: No, it's not. Get out and vote tomorrow. 240 00:12:26,487 --> 00:12:28,520 if you want to vote in the Republican primary. 241 00:12:28,555 --> 00:12:30,929 Our current polls do show, among Republicans,, 242 00:12:30,964 --> 00:12:33,261 30% favor Trump... Liz. 243 00:12:33,296 --> 00:12:34,662 NEWSCASTER 3: ...senator Ted Cruz, 244 00:12:34,698 --> 00:12:38,200 17% would vote for Florida senator Marco Rubio, 245 00:12:38,235 --> 00:12:41,038 and 5% for Ohio governor John Kasich. 246 00:12:41,073 --> 00:12:42,339 Liz. 247 00:12:42,375 --> 00:12:43,440 NEWSCASTER 3: ...for someone else, if they could. 248 00:12:43,476 --> 00:12:46,010 Below a percent that just don't know. 249 00:12:46,045 --> 00:12:47,611 NEWSCASTER 1: Meanwhile, Vermont senator Bernie Sanders 250 00:12:47,647 --> 00:12:50,949 is expected to win the Gem State on the Democratic side... 251 00:12:50,984 --> 00:12:51,850 Please. 252 00:12:51,885 --> 00:12:54,381 (NEWSCASTER 1 CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY) 253 00:13:19,375 --> 00:13:20,374 Thank you. 254 00:13:31,750 --> 00:13:33,618 (CRUNCHING) 255 00:13:43,201 --> 00:13:45,168 (LAUGHTER ON TV) 256 00:13:45,203 --> 00:13:47,467 Oh, I've seen this one, it's good. 257 00:13:47,502 --> 00:13:49,304 (INDISTINCT TV CHATTER) 258 00:13:53,112 --> 00:13:54,738 (RAIN PATTERING) 259 00:13:56,115 --> 00:13:58,115 (INDISTINCT TV CHATTER) 260 00:14:00,614 --> 00:14:02,581 (CHARLIE CHOKES, COUGHS) 261 00:14:03,452 --> 00:14:05,683 (COUGHING) 262 00:14:10,723 --> 00:14:12,162 (REMOTE CLICKS) (TV SWITCHES OFF) 263 00:14:15,431 --> 00:14:16,562 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 264 00:14:19,732 --> 00:14:22,007 (SOFT MUSIC PLAYING) 265 00:14:38,355 --> 00:14:42,390 CHARLIE: In the first part of his book, the author, 266 00:14:44,361 --> 00:14:46,097 calling himself Ishmael, 267 00:14:47,133 --> 00:14:52,532 is in a small seaside town 268 00:14:54,338 --> 00:14:55,469 and he is 269 00:14:57,539 --> 00:15:00,804 sharing a bed with a man 270 00:15:02,643 --> 00:15:04,148 named Queequeg. 271 00:15:08,484 --> 00:15:11,485 The author and Queequeg go to church, 272 00:15:12,488 --> 00:15:15,159 and later, they set out on a ship 273 00:15:15,194 --> 00:15:16,655 captained by the pirate named 274 00:15:18,428 --> 00:15:19,493 Ahab, 275 00:15:22,333 --> 00:15:24,498 who is missing a leg, 276 00:15:24,533 --> 00:15:27,369 and very much wants to kill the whale 277 00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:31,439 which is named Moby Dick, 278 00:15:32,541 --> 00:15:33,672 and which is white. 279 00:15:35,148 --> 00:15:37,544 In the course of the book, 280 00:15:37,579 --> 00:15:40,184 the pirate Ahab encounters many hardships. 281 00:15:41,352 --> 00:15:44,485 His entire life is set around 282 00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:47,125 trying to kill a certain whale. 283 00:15:47,160 --> 00:15:48,819 I think this is sad 284 00:15:48,854 --> 00:15:49,787 (GRUNTS) 285 00:15:49,822 --> 00:15:53,230 because the whale doesn't have any emotions. 286 00:15:55,399 --> 00:15:56,563 (GRUNTS) 287 00:15:56,862 --> 00:15:58,103 He's just 288 00:15:59,469 --> 00:16:00,798 a poor, big animal. 289 00:16:03,308 --> 00:16:07,772 And I feel bad for Ahab as well 290 00:16:09,446 --> 00:16:10,808 (GRUNTS) 291 00:16:10,843 --> 00:16:16,319 ...because he thinks that his life will be better 292 00:16:16,354 --> 00:16:19,487 if he can just kill this whale. 293 00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,822 But in reality, 294 00:16:25,462 --> 00:16:26,461 (GRUNTS) 295 00:16:28,300 --> 00:16:29,662 it won't help him at all. 296 00:16:31,666 --> 00:16:34,205 This book made me think 297 00:16:35,274 --> 00:16:36,405 about my own life. 298 00:16:39,905 --> 00:16:42,378 This book made me think about my own life. 299 00:16:42,413 --> 00:16:45,447 (OCEAN WAVES CRASHING) 300 00:16:45,482 --> 00:16:49,385 (SOFTLY) This book made me think about my own life. 301 00:17:38,865 --> 00:17:39,864 (SIGHS) 302 00:17:46,444 --> 00:17:47,740 (EXHALES) 303 00:17:50,283 --> 00:17:51,414 (TYPING) 304 00:18:02,625 --> 00:18:04,361 (TYPING) 305 00:18:18,707 --> 00:18:19,838 (SIGHS) 306 00:18:21,039 --> 00:18:22,742 (TYPING) 307 00:18:35,988 --> 00:18:37,020 (EXHALES) 308 00:18:56,481 --> 00:18:58,448 (WRAPPER CRINKLING) 309 00:19:00,716 --> 00:19:02,287 (BIRD CHIRPS) 310 00:19:04,951 --> 00:19:06,390 (CHIRPS) 311 00:19:20,604 --> 00:19:21,867 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 312 00:19:48,467 --> 00:19:49,961 (LINE RINGS) 313 00:19:50,964 --> 00:19:53,338 (CLEARS THROAT) (LINE CONNECTS) 314 00:20:30,740 --> 00:20:31,871 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 315 00:20:35,074 --> 00:20:37,008 (CHUCKLES QUIETLY) 316 00:20:37,043 --> 00:20:38,647 Does this mean now I'm gonna get fat? 317 00:20:39,716 --> 00:20:42,618 (GRUNTS) No, it doesn't. 318 00:20:43,753 --> 00:20:45,082 I was always big. 319 00:20:45,117 --> 00:20:46,149 I just... 320 00:20:47,053 --> 00:20:48,558 I let it get out of control. 321 00:20:49,990 --> 00:20:51,462 (CHARLIE EXHALES) 322 00:20:53,532 --> 00:20:56,797 So, was your mom okay with you coming over here? 323 00:20:57,767 --> 00:20:58,898 I didn't tell her. 324 00:21:01,936 --> 00:21:03,408 CHARLIE: It's really good to see you. 325 00:21:05,544 --> 00:21:06,642 You look beautiful. 326 00:21:09,614 --> 00:21:10,811 So, how's school? 327 00:21:11,649 --> 00:21:13,451 You're a senior, right? 328 00:21:13,486 --> 00:21:14,881 You actually care? 329 00:21:14,916 --> 00:21:16,916 Well, of course I care. 330 00:21:16,951 --> 00:21:18,621 I pester your mom for information 331 00:21:18,656 --> 00:21:19,886 as often as she'll give it to me. 332 00:21:21,989 --> 00:21:23,120 (CHARLIE EXHALES) 333 00:21:25,861 --> 00:21:26,860 Um... 334 00:21:28,534 --> 00:21:30,864 So... (GRUNTS) 335 00:21:30,899 --> 00:21:33,471 Why are you... I mean, don't you have school? 336 00:21:33,506 --> 00:21:34,934 Got suspended this morning. 337 00:21:35,673 --> 00:21:36,672 Oh. 338 00:21:37,510 --> 00:21:38,676 Why? 339 00:21:38,711 --> 00:21:40,874 I posted something about my stupid bitch lab partner 340 00:21:40,909 --> 00:21:43,140 that the vice principal said was "Vaguely threatening." 341 00:21:44,583 --> 00:21:45,813 (GRUNTS) 342 00:21:46,915 --> 00:21:48,046 You don't like school? 343 00:21:48,081 --> 00:21:49,553 Only idiots like high school. 344 00:21:50,952 --> 00:21:53,458 But you're on track to graduate, right? 345 00:21:55,286 --> 00:21:56,626 Counselor says I might not. 346 00:21:58,190 --> 00:21:59,464 I'm not worried. 347 00:22:00,995 --> 00:22:01,994 I'm a smart person. 348 00:22:02,898 --> 00:22:04,062 I never forget anything. 349 00:22:05,263 --> 00:22:06,999 High school is just bullshit. 350 00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:08,902 But, Ellie, it's important. 351 00:22:08,937 --> 00:22:09,970 If you don't graduate, then... 352 00:22:10,005 --> 00:22:11,707 Are you actually trying to parent me right now? 353 00:22:12,908 --> 00:22:14,611 No, I'm... Sorry. 354 00:22:14,910 --> 00:22:16,679 I just... 355 00:22:16,714 --> 00:22:18,813 I just thought that maybe we could spend some time with each other. 356 00:22:19,783 --> 00:22:21,013 I'm not spending time with you. 357 00:22:21,785 --> 00:22:22,784 You're disgusting. 358 00:22:28,253 --> 00:22:30,121 Well, I'm a lot bigger than I was 359 00:22:30,156 --> 00:22:31,222 since last time you saw me. 360 00:22:31,257 --> 00:22:33,795 ELLIE: No, I'm not talking about what you look like. 361 00:22:33,830 --> 00:22:35,731 You'd be disgusting even if you weren't this fat. 362 00:22:36,965 --> 00:22:38,932 You'd still be that piece-of-shit dad 363 00:22:38,967 --> 00:22:40,263 who walked out on me when I was eight. 364 00:22:41,772 --> 00:22:43,772 All because he wanted to fuck one of his students. 365 00:22:43,807 --> 00:22:44,839 Can I have one of these? 366 00:22:46,271 --> 00:22:47,070 Yeah. 367 00:22:50,913 --> 00:22:52,583 Look, it's... it's been a long time. 368 00:22:52,618 --> 00:22:54,079 I just thought that maybe 369 00:22:55,346 --> 00:22:56,818 we can get to know each other. 370 00:22:58,657 --> 00:22:59,788 I don't even know why I'm here. 371 00:23:00,758 --> 00:23:01,757 I can pay you. 372 00:23:06,632 --> 00:23:08,291 You want to pay me to spend time with you? 373 00:23:08,326 --> 00:23:10,326 And I can help you with your work. 374 00:23:10,361 --> 00:23:12,097 It's what I do for my job. 375 00:23:13,870 --> 00:23:15,166 I can help you pass your classes. 376 00:23:16,873 --> 00:23:18,906 You teach online? Yes. 377 00:23:18,941 --> 00:23:20,710 Your students know what you look like? 378 00:23:20,745 --> 00:23:22,646 I keep the camera shut off. 379 00:23:22,681 --> 00:23:24,109 Yeah, that's probably a good idea. 380 00:23:31,250 --> 00:23:33,283 My counselor says that if I show a lot of improvement 381 00:23:33,318 --> 00:23:34,724 in one subject, 382 00:23:34,759 --> 00:23:35,758 I might be able to graduate. 383 00:23:36,992 --> 00:23:39,256 You can rewrite these essays for English. 384 00:23:39,291 --> 00:23:40,829 They have to be really good, though. 385 00:23:44,670 --> 00:23:45,999 Well, look, um... 386 00:23:46,034 --> 00:23:47,803 I don't know if I should write them for you, 387 00:23:47,838 --> 00:23:48,903 but I can work with you on them. 388 00:23:48,938 --> 00:23:50,069 How much can you pay me? 389 00:23:51,204 --> 00:23:52,170 Everything I have. 390 00:23:52,205 --> 00:23:54,579 All the money I have in the bank. How much? 391 00:23:56,715 --> 00:23:59,980 $120,000? Something like that. I'd have to check. 392 00:24:01,687 --> 00:24:02,983 I never go out. 393 00:24:03,018 --> 00:24:06,151 All I pay for is food, rent, Internet. 394 00:24:06,923 --> 00:24:08,626 And I work all the time. 395 00:24:09,992 --> 00:24:11,090 And you'd give all of it to me? 396 00:24:12,698 --> 00:24:13,697 Not to my mom, to me? 397 00:24:15,327 --> 00:24:17,327 Yes. Just... 398 00:24:18,396 --> 00:24:19,901 don't tell your mom, 399 00:24:20,332 --> 00:24:21,331 all right? 400 00:24:22,972 --> 00:24:26,875 And maybe you could do some writing just for me. 401 00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:28,976 Why? 402 00:24:29,011 --> 00:24:31,814 Because you're a smart person. 403 00:24:31,849 --> 00:24:33,948 And I bet you'd make a strong writer. 404 00:24:36,183 --> 00:24:37,886 Plus, I'm a teacher. I want to make sure 405 00:24:37,921 --> 00:24:39,756 you're getting something out of this. 406 00:24:42,860 --> 00:24:45,157 (ZIPS BAG) I don't even understand you. 407 00:24:56,104 --> 00:24:57,334 Stand up and walk over to me. 408 00:24:58,810 --> 00:24:59,941 What? 409 00:24:59,976 --> 00:25:01,811 Come over here. Walk toward me. 410 00:25:05,410 --> 00:25:07,179 No. No. Without this thing. 411 00:25:08,886 --> 00:25:10,787 Stand up and walk over here. 412 00:25:13,220 --> 00:25:14,659 Ellie, I can't really... Shut up! 413 00:25:16,355 --> 00:25:17,728 Come over here. 414 00:25:23,362 --> 00:25:24,735 (CHARLIE SIGHS) 415 00:25:30,501 --> 00:25:31,808 (EXHALES HEAVILY) 416 00:25:32,338 --> 00:25:33,337 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 417 00:25:38,982 --> 00:25:40,817 (GRUNTS WITH EXERTION) 418 00:25:40,852 --> 00:25:42,379 (GRUNTS, GROANS) 419 00:25:43,019 --> 00:25:45,954 (PANTING) 420 00:25:48,321 --> 00:25:50,695 (HUFFING) 421 00:25:51,489 --> 00:25:54,292 (GRUNTS) 422 00:25:58,430 --> 00:25:59,770 (CHARLIE YELLS) 423 00:26:00,267 --> 00:26:01,970 (GROANING LOUDLY) 424 00:26:03,105 --> 00:26:05,072 (GROANING IN PAIN) 425 00:26:09,243 --> 00:26:11,243 (PANTING) 426 00:26:13,412 --> 00:26:15,313 (DOG BARKS OUTSIDE) 427 00:26:21,156 --> 00:26:23,024 (WHISPERING) "...celebrate my soul. 428 00:26:24,159 --> 00:26:25,862 "Sell my soul." 429 00:26:25,897 --> 00:26:27,061 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 430 00:26:27,558 --> 00:26:28,799 MAN: Gambino's! 431 00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:30,867 Yeah, you can, um... 432 00:26:32,002 --> 00:26:33,430 I put a $20 in the mailbox. 433 00:26:34,906 --> 00:26:35,938 MAN: Sure. 434 00:26:39,537 --> 00:26:42,010 You can just leave it on the... 435 00:26:42,045 --> 00:26:44,276 MAN: Yeah, I, uh... I remember. 436 00:26:46,412 --> 00:26:47,752 Everything okay in there? 437 00:26:52,385 --> 00:26:53,384 Yeah. 438 00:26:55,190 --> 00:26:56,222 MAN: You sure? 439 00:26:57,027 --> 00:26:58,026 Yeah. 440 00:26:58,897 --> 00:26:59,929 I'm fine. 441 00:27:02,362 --> 00:27:03,361 Thank you. 442 00:27:05,332 --> 00:27:06,331 (METAL CLACKS) 443 00:27:07,202 --> 00:27:08,806 (FOOTSTEPS) 444 00:27:12,108 --> 00:27:13,206 (CHUCKLES LIGHTLY) 445 00:27:20,446 --> 00:27:21,885 (CAR ENGINE STARTS) 446 00:27:47,044 --> 00:27:48,879 Breathe slowly. (DEVICE BEEPS) 447 00:27:48,914 --> 00:27:50,210 (INHALES) 448 00:27:50,245 --> 00:27:51,277 Relax. 449 00:27:51,312 --> 00:27:52,411 (EXHALES) (DEVICE BEEPS) 450 00:27:52,447 --> 00:27:55,578 It measures perspiration. It's an indicator of stress. 451 00:27:55,613 --> 00:27:57,019 It's about establishing a relationship 452 00:27:57,054 --> 00:27:58,284 between your brain and your body. 453 00:27:58,319 --> 00:27:59,857 If you know how to make yourself calm, 454 00:27:59,892 --> 00:28:01,023 then your blood pressure will... 455 00:28:01,058 --> 00:28:03,124 (DEVICE BEEPS) Here. 456 00:28:03,159 --> 00:28:05,159 I don't need a little machine to tell me 457 00:28:05,194 --> 00:28:07,623 to take a few deep breaths and stop sweating. 458 00:28:07,658 --> 00:28:09,999 Well, apparently, you fucking do. 459 00:28:10,034 --> 00:28:12,628 (DEVICE BEEPS) Take another deep breath. 460 00:28:12,663 --> 00:28:15,334 (BREATHES DEEPLY) (DEVICE BEEPS) 461 00:28:15,369 --> 00:28:16,434 Thank you. 462 00:28:18,405 --> 00:28:20,009 (CHARLIE EXHALES DEEPLY) 463 00:28:20,044 --> 00:28:22,275 (LIZ SIGHS) 464 00:28:22,310 --> 00:28:26,378 We're just gonna try some different methods, or whatever. 465 00:28:26,413 --> 00:28:30,019 If you refuse to go to the hospital, then you'll... 466 00:28:31,154 --> 00:28:32,219 I don't know. 467 00:28:40,328 --> 00:28:41,492 Where'd this come from? 468 00:28:41,527 --> 00:28:43,032 (DEVICE CONTINUES BEEPING) 469 00:28:46,499 --> 00:28:47,498 Hey. 470 00:28:50,943 --> 00:28:51,942 Was she here? 471 00:28:55,145 --> 00:28:57,145 No, I don't like this. 472 00:28:57,180 --> 00:28:59,312 This isn't a good idea. 473 00:28:59,347 --> 00:29:01,281 You know you're not supposed to be around her. 474 00:29:02,581 --> 00:29:03,921 Does her mom know about this? 475 00:29:03,956 --> 00:29:05,351 I just wanted to see her. 476 00:29:05,386 --> 00:29:07,386 Mary has kept her from me all this time. 477 00:29:07,421 --> 00:29:10,092 Why do you suddenly need to see her so bad, why now? 478 00:29:10,127 --> 00:29:11,126 Liz. 479 00:29:15,066 --> 00:29:16,164 (LIZ SIGHS) 480 00:29:18,300 --> 00:29:20,168 Why the hell do you have her homework, anyway? 481 00:29:21,072 --> 00:29:24,568 Look, I didn't plan for this. 482 00:29:24,603 --> 00:29:26,306 She needs some help at school, 483 00:29:26,341 --> 00:29:28,671 so I'm gonna help her with a few essays. 484 00:29:28,706 --> 00:29:29,839 (LIZ SCOFFS) 485 00:29:29,874 --> 00:29:31,949 You haven't seen her since she was eight years old, 486 00:29:31,984 --> 00:29:33,082 and you're gonna reconnect with her 487 00:29:33,117 --> 00:29:34,677 by doing her homework for her? 488 00:29:34,712 --> 00:29:36,217 It's fine. It's not fine. 489 00:29:39,090 --> 00:29:40,925 She shouldn't be around you when you're like this. 490 00:29:42,192 --> 00:29:44,720 What if something happens, what if you need help? 491 00:29:44,755 --> 00:29:46,260 (DEVICE BEEPING RAPIDLY) 492 00:29:46,295 --> 00:29:47,459 Charlie, calm down. 493 00:29:48,462 --> 00:29:50,132 Hey. No. (BEEPING STOPS) 494 00:29:52,664 --> 00:29:54,103 Okay. Forget it, then. 495 00:29:55,403 --> 00:29:57,436 I'm worried about her. Why? 496 00:30:00,177 --> 00:30:01,638 Oh, you're spying on her now? 497 00:30:03,378 --> 00:30:05,246 It doesn't look like she has any friends. 498 00:30:09,417 --> 00:30:10,449 I don't think this is... 499 00:30:15,258 --> 00:30:17,423 (CHARLIE SCOFFS) Come on, a dead dog? 500 00:30:24,036 --> 00:30:25,497 I'm worried that she's forgotten 501 00:30:25,532 --> 00:30:27,367 what an amazing person she is. 502 00:30:32,605 --> 00:30:34,440 She's just a teenager. 503 00:30:34,475 --> 00:30:36,508 Everyone is insane when they're a teenager. 504 00:30:36,543 --> 00:30:37,442 When I was her age, 505 00:30:37,478 --> 00:30:39,214 when my dad would really piss me off... 506 00:30:41,119 --> 00:30:43,218 I'm just lucky I didn't get arrested, that's all I'll say. 507 00:30:46,619 --> 00:30:47,651 Point is, 508 00:30:49,655 --> 00:30:52,161 bringing her over here is a bad idea. 509 00:30:52,196 --> 00:30:54,196 You have enough to deal with right now, you hear me? 510 00:30:55,727 --> 00:30:57,364 Do not bring her over here again. 511 00:30:58,136 --> 00:30:59,234 Okay. 512 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:01,599 Okay. 513 00:31:06,705 --> 00:31:09,211 It's not like she's alone, you know. She has her mom. 514 00:31:15,285 --> 00:31:17,615 LIZ: Ugh, shit. I have to go soon. 515 00:31:19,091 --> 00:31:21,289 I hate these night shifts. (UTENSILS CLACKING) 516 00:31:21,324 --> 00:31:25,359 It's just a steady parade of dumb, drunk college kids. 517 00:31:25,394 --> 00:31:26,591 (FAUCET RUNS) 518 00:31:27,693 --> 00:31:29,462 (LAUGHING) Did I tell you about this girl 519 00:31:29,497 --> 00:31:31,464 from a few nights ago? (GAGS) 520 00:31:31,499 --> 00:31:34,071 The puke was bright purple, I swear. 521 00:31:34,106 --> 00:31:36,535 (CHOKING) (LIZ LAUGHING) 522 00:31:36,570 --> 00:31:37,569 I mean, what is that? 523 00:31:37,605 --> 00:31:40,440 Why can't these kids just drink beer? You know. 524 00:31:41,839 --> 00:31:44,147 Are you choking? (CONTINUES CHOKING) 525 00:31:44,182 --> 00:31:46,380 Oh, God! Okay, lean on that arm. 526 00:31:47,152 --> 00:31:48,151 Lean on that arm! 527 00:31:49,121 --> 00:31:50,483 Okay, I need you to rock with me. 528 00:31:51,321 --> 00:31:53,354 (GRUNTS) (CHOKES) 529 00:31:53,389 --> 00:31:54,718 (GRUNTS) (CHARLIE GASPS) 530 00:31:55,655 --> 00:31:56,687 (LIZ YELLS) 531 00:31:56,722 --> 00:31:59,096 (COUGHS, WHEEZES) 532 00:31:59,131 --> 00:32:01,791 (COUGHING, WHEEZING) 533 00:32:01,826 --> 00:32:03,826 (GASPING) 534 00:32:04,862 --> 00:32:06,499 I'm okay. (GASPS) 535 00:32:07,634 --> 00:32:11,438 I'm okay. (GASPS) 536 00:32:11,473 --> 00:32:14,111 (SHOUTS) God damn it, Charlie, what is wrong with you? 537 00:32:14,146 --> 00:32:15,045 (HITS) 538 00:32:15,081 --> 00:32:17,279 Chew your food like a normal human being! 539 00:32:17,314 --> 00:32:19,215 You could have just died right in front of me! 540 00:32:19,250 --> 00:32:20,249 I'm sorry. 541 00:32:21,318 --> 00:32:24,220 (CHARLIE WHIMPERS AND SOBS) 542 00:32:26,323 --> 00:32:27,355 I'm sorry, Liz. 543 00:32:39,468 --> 00:32:40,500 (OBJECT CLACKS) 544 00:32:47,674 --> 00:32:48,805 (LIZ EXHALES) 545 00:32:55,616 --> 00:32:56,615 It's okay. 546 00:33:20,707 --> 00:33:22,839 CHARLIE: I read through some of the posts 547 00:33:22,874 --> 00:33:25,809 in the class discussion forum this morning. 548 00:33:25,844 --> 00:33:28,350 In particular, a post 549 00:33:28,385 --> 00:33:32,618 about crafting a good thesis, and I quote, 550 00:33:32,653 --> 00:33:34,818 "Just pick a sentence from the reading 551 00:33:34,853 --> 00:33:37,359 "and say, 'It's good,' or some shit." 552 00:33:37,394 --> 00:33:40,428 Listen, at this point in the course, 553 00:33:40,463 --> 00:33:43,497 I have given you all that I can, 554 00:33:43,532 --> 00:33:46,863 in terms of structure, building a thesis, 555 00:33:46,898 --> 00:33:48,502 paragraph organization. 556 00:33:49,703 --> 00:33:52,572 But if all of that isn't built 557 00:33:52,607 --> 00:33:55,443 on your own original ideas and truthful analysis, 558 00:33:55,478 --> 00:33:56,774 it doesn't mean anything. 559 00:33:58,514 --> 00:34:00,712 Think about that as you write and revise. 560 00:34:00,747 --> 00:34:03,385 Think about the truth of your argument. 561 00:34:04,850 --> 00:34:08,819 I know this may sound silly, but it's important. 562 00:34:10,460 --> 00:34:12,889 Promise, it's important. 563 00:34:16,499 --> 00:34:17,894 (BIRD CHIRPING) 564 00:34:32,581 --> 00:34:34,647 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 565 00:34:43,691 --> 00:34:44,723 (STRAINING) 566 00:34:45,495 --> 00:34:46,659 (KEY CLATTERS) 567 00:34:53,668 --> 00:34:56,438 (GRUNTING SOFTLY) 568 00:35:05,042 --> 00:35:06,316 (KEY CLACKS) 569 00:35:08,012 --> 00:35:09,286 (CLAW CLICKS) 570 00:35:17,626 --> 00:35:19,593 (MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY) 571 00:35:22,565 --> 00:35:23,696 (SIGHS) 572 00:35:31,970 --> 00:35:34,608 This is... (EXHALES) 573 00:35:34,643 --> 00:35:37,281 You say that Walt Whitman wrote Song for Myself. 574 00:35:37,613 --> 00:35:38,810 Yeah? 575 00:35:38,845 --> 00:35:40,581 It's called Song of Myself. 576 00:35:42,420 --> 00:35:43,452 My title's better. 577 00:35:45,621 --> 00:35:46,620 Yeah. 578 00:35:47,656 --> 00:35:48,655 Well... 579 00:35:49,592 --> 00:35:50,624 Okay, I'll just change it. 580 00:35:52,430 --> 00:35:54,793 "The poem Song of Myself 581 00:35:54,828 --> 00:35:56,795 "is in a book called Leaves of Grass. 582 00:35:56,830 --> 00:35:58,500 "It was written by Walt Whitman 583 00:35:58,535 --> 00:36:00,700 "and was published in 1855. 584 00:36:00,735 --> 00:36:02,669 "He paid for the first publication himself." 585 00:36:02,704 --> 00:36:05,705 You don't have to read it out loud. Just rewrite it. 586 00:36:05,740 --> 00:36:07,773 You're supposed to analyze the poem. 587 00:36:07,808 --> 00:36:09,346 This is just a list of facts. 588 00:36:09,381 --> 00:36:11,546 Yup. Thank you, Wikipedia. 589 00:36:13,110 --> 00:36:14,813 (SMACKS LIPS) 590 00:36:14,848 --> 00:36:16,650 You know, it's really an amazing poem. 591 00:36:16,685 --> 00:36:20,456 Whitman uses the metaphor of "I" not to refer to himself, 592 00:36:20,491 --> 00:36:24,053 but to explode the very definition of self 593 00:36:24,088 --> 00:36:26,561 in favor of a more all-encompassing... 594 00:36:26,596 --> 00:36:27,892 I really, really don't care. 595 00:36:32,569 --> 00:36:34,800 You know, I think you might like it if you actually read it. 596 00:36:35,935 --> 00:36:38,573 You're just like my teachers. 597 00:36:38,608 --> 00:36:40,971 You think just because I'm not losing my shit over the poem, 598 00:36:41,006 --> 00:36:42,445 it's because I didn't read it. 599 00:36:42,480 --> 00:36:43,446 I did read it. 600 00:36:43,481 --> 00:36:46,108 It's overwritten, and dumb, and repetitive. 601 00:36:46,143 --> 00:36:48,781 And even though he thinks his metaphor of "I" is deep, 602 00:36:48,816 --> 00:36:50,684 it's actually just a bunch of bullshit. 603 00:36:50,719 --> 00:36:51,652 And, in reality, 604 00:36:51,687 --> 00:36:54,919 he's just some worthless 19th century faggot. 605 00:36:57,462 --> 00:36:59,891 That's an interesting perspective. 606 00:36:59,926 --> 00:37:01,662 It would make for an interesting essay. 607 00:37:04,062 --> 00:37:07,129 Just write that thing about exploding the definition of self. 608 00:37:07,164 --> 00:37:08,603 My English teacher will love it. 609 00:37:13,170 --> 00:37:14,510 (CHARLIE SIGHS) 610 00:37:17,075 --> 00:37:19,911 So, how's your mom doing? Oh, my God. 611 00:37:21,651 --> 00:37:23,915 Look, if you're not gonna write these essays for me, then... 612 00:37:23,950 --> 00:37:27,688 CHARLIE: Ellie, I don't need you here to write these essays for you. 613 00:37:27,723 --> 00:37:29,393 If you want to go, you can go. 614 00:37:30,726 --> 00:37:31,824 You can still have the money. 615 00:37:34,664 --> 00:37:36,994 I thought you wanted to get to know me. I do, 616 00:37:37,029 --> 00:37:38,633 but I don't want to force you to be here. 617 00:37:40,472 --> 00:37:41,537 It's up to you. 618 00:37:45,070 --> 00:37:46,069 (PUTS BAG DOWN) 619 00:37:47,644 --> 00:37:48,643 She's fine. 620 00:37:49,613 --> 00:37:50,711 Mom. I guess. 621 00:37:51,846 --> 00:37:54,110 She happy? When she drinks. 622 00:37:56,048 --> 00:37:58,653 You guys still live in that duplex over on Orchard? 623 00:37:59,755 --> 00:38:00,820 You don't even know where we live? 624 00:38:03,792 --> 00:38:04,791 You don't stay in touch with Mom? 625 00:38:04,827 --> 00:38:08,465 Yeah, I check in with her as often as she lets me. 626 00:38:08,500 --> 00:38:09,928 She really only tells me things about you. 627 00:38:10,898 --> 00:38:12,161 Why? 628 00:38:12,196 --> 00:38:13,965 Because that's all I want to know about. 629 00:38:20,237 --> 00:38:21,478 When I was 11, 630 00:38:21,513 --> 00:38:22,875 we moved to the other side of town, 631 00:38:23,746 --> 00:38:24,844 near the Walmart. 632 00:38:25,550 --> 00:38:26,549 Is your mother 633 00:38:27,651 --> 00:38:29,651 with anyone right now? No. 634 00:38:30,522 --> 00:38:32,214 Why, you interested? 635 00:38:32,249 --> 00:38:34,821 (CHUCKLES) No, of course not. 636 00:38:42,732 --> 00:38:44,127 Why'd you gain all that weight? 637 00:38:44,162 --> 00:38:45,428 (INHALES DEEPLY) I don't... 638 00:38:45,464 --> 00:38:47,702 If you're gonna interrogate me, I'm gonna do the same thing. 639 00:38:50,135 --> 00:38:51,233 Why'd you gain all that weight? 640 00:38:55,679 --> 00:38:59,043 Someone close to me passed away, and it... 641 00:38:59,881 --> 00:39:02,079 It had an effect on me. 642 00:39:02,114 --> 00:39:03,113 Your boyfriend. 643 00:39:04,248 --> 00:39:06,952 My partner. Your student. 644 00:39:06,987 --> 00:39:09,119 He wasn't that young. It was a night school course. 645 00:39:09,154 --> 00:39:10,186 ELLIE: Oh, I remember him. 646 00:39:11,728 --> 00:39:12,826 You had him over for dinner once 647 00:39:12,861 --> 00:39:14,795 when Mom was in Montana, visiting Grandma. 648 00:39:16,634 --> 00:39:17,732 You made steaks. 649 00:39:18,735 --> 00:39:20,229 The good kind. 650 00:39:20,264 --> 00:39:23,199 Better meal than you ever made for me or Mom. 651 00:39:23,234 --> 00:39:25,740 I remember hearing you two talk after I went to bed. 652 00:39:29,042 --> 00:39:30,811 How do you remember all that? 653 00:39:30,846 --> 00:39:33,110 I told you, I never forget anything. 654 00:39:43,287 --> 00:39:44,286 How did he die? 655 00:39:46,290 --> 00:39:48,598 I... I don't... I'm... 656 00:39:48,633 --> 00:39:50,897 I really don't want to talk about that right now, 657 00:39:52,164 --> 00:39:53,669 if that's all right with you. 658 00:39:58,742 --> 00:40:00,742 (CELL PHONE KEYS CLACKING) 659 00:40:05,309 --> 00:40:06,781 I'll write these essays for you. 660 00:40:08,686 --> 00:40:11,852 I want you to do some writing, just for me. 661 00:40:12,888 --> 00:40:14,723 I hate writing essays. 662 00:40:14,758 --> 00:40:16,318 Just think about the poem for a while, 663 00:40:17,321 --> 00:40:18,320 and write something. 664 00:40:21,028 --> 00:40:22,929 Be honest. 665 00:40:22,964 --> 00:40:25,030 Tell me what you really think. 666 00:40:25,065 --> 00:40:26,768 You want me to write what I really think? 667 00:40:28,266 --> 00:40:29,331 I'll be right back. 668 00:40:30,675 --> 00:40:32,708 Just write whatever you want. 669 00:40:35,306 --> 00:40:38,681 (CHARLIE GROANING WITH EXERTION) 670 00:40:41,015 --> 00:40:42,113 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 671 00:40:43,248 --> 00:40:45,688 (CONTINUES GROANING) 672 00:40:45,723 --> 00:40:49,054 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 673 00:41:21,726 --> 00:41:23,121 (WATER RUNNING) 674 00:41:25,730 --> 00:41:27,829 (SUPPRESSED SOBBING) 675 00:41:28,425 --> 00:41:30,964 (MUFFLED SOBBING) 676 00:41:30,999 --> 00:41:32,834 (WATER CONTINUES RUNNING) 677 00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:36,673 Are you okay? 678 00:41:36,708 --> 00:41:38,334 Unless you're dying, there's no way I'm going in there. 679 00:41:38,369 --> 00:41:39,907 (SNIFFLES) 680 00:41:39,942 --> 00:41:42,173 (EXHALES) Oh, yeah. I'm fine. I'm fine. 681 00:41:48,984 --> 00:41:50,786 (BRID WINGS FLAPPING) 682 00:41:58,928 --> 00:42:00,125 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 683 00:42:01,359 --> 00:42:03,129 (WATER RUNNING) (KNOCKING CONTINUES) 684 00:42:07,002 --> 00:42:08,331 Hi. 685 00:42:08,366 --> 00:42:09,904 I was looking for Charlie? 686 00:42:10,500 --> 00:42:11,741 He's in the bathroom. 687 00:42:12,403 --> 00:42:13,809 Oh, I can come back. 688 00:42:19,212 --> 00:42:21,047 Are you his friend, or... 689 00:42:21,082 --> 00:42:22,378 I'm his daughter. 690 00:42:22,413 --> 00:42:24,919 Oh. Are you surprised? 691 00:42:25,922 --> 00:42:27,021 Yeah, I guess. 692 00:42:27,057 --> 00:42:29,022 What's more surprising? That a gay guy has a daughter, 693 00:42:29,057 --> 00:42:30,694 or that someone actually found his penis? 694 00:42:33,358 --> 00:42:34,357 I'm kidding. 695 00:42:35,426 --> 00:42:36,458 Jesus. 696 00:42:37,395 --> 00:42:38,594 Um... 697 00:42:38,630 --> 00:42:41,463 Charlie was interested in hearing more about my church, 698 00:42:41,498 --> 00:42:42,364 and I brought some literature... 699 00:42:42,399 --> 00:42:45,071 Are you Mormon? No, I'm from New Life. 700 00:42:45,106 --> 00:42:47,777 Oh. That end times cult thing. 701 00:42:47,812 --> 00:42:49,746 (POURS JUICE) It's not a cult. 702 00:42:49,781 --> 00:42:51,473 Tell you one thing that I like about religion. 703 00:42:51,508 --> 00:42:52,947 What I like about religion 704 00:42:52,982 --> 00:42:55,081 is that it assumes that everyone is an idiot 705 00:42:55,116 --> 00:42:57,050 and that they're all incapable of saving themselves. 706 00:42:57,085 --> 00:42:58,788 I think they got something right with that. 707 00:42:58,823 --> 00:42:59,954 I don't think like that... 708 00:42:59,989 --> 00:43:01,824 What I don't like about religion 709 00:43:01,859 --> 00:43:04,288 is that when people accept Jesus or whatever, 710 00:43:04,323 --> 00:43:05,960 they suddenly think that they're better 711 00:43:05,995 --> 00:43:07,061 than everyone else. (CHARLIE GRUNTING) 712 00:43:07,096 --> 00:43:09,260 By accepting the fact that they're stupid sinners, 713 00:43:09,295 --> 00:43:12,494 somehow they've become better, and they turn into assholes. 714 00:43:15,070 --> 00:43:16,300 I don't really know what to say. 715 00:43:16,335 --> 00:43:18,302 I have some pamphlets that I think would... 716 00:43:18,337 --> 00:43:20,172 (CAMERA CLICKS) Why did you just do that? 717 00:43:20,207 --> 00:43:21,877 Are you coming back tomorrow? 718 00:43:21,912 --> 00:43:23,307 I'm not sure... Come back tomorrow. 719 00:43:23,342 --> 00:43:25,342 I'll be here around the same time. 720 00:43:25,377 --> 00:43:26,981 I'm sorry, what's happening? 721 00:43:27,544 --> 00:43:28,917 (CAMERA CLICKS) 722 00:43:29,381 --> 00:43:30,952 Oh! 723 00:43:30,987 --> 00:43:32,921 Hi. I was just coming over 724 00:43:32,956 --> 00:43:34,120 to share these pamphlets with you. 725 00:43:34,155 --> 00:43:35,253 You'll have those done by tomorrow? 726 00:43:36,124 --> 00:43:37,123 Sure. 727 00:43:37,895 --> 00:43:39,224 Five-page minimum. 728 00:43:39,259 --> 00:43:40,489 It'll be good, I promise. 729 00:43:43,835 --> 00:43:45,428 I'm Ellie. Thomas. 730 00:43:46,299 --> 00:43:48,365 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 731 00:43:49,434 --> 00:43:50,774 (SLAMS DOOR SHUT) 732 00:43:54,373 --> 00:43:55,406 So... 733 00:43:55,441 --> 00:43:58,012 Christ's return has been promised for centuries. 734 00:43:58,047 --> 00:43:59,409 But there are a lot of clues in Scripture 735 00:43:59,444 --> 00:44:00,610 that suggest it's imminent. 736 00:44:00,645 --> 00:44:03,017 So, that means we don't have time to deny the Gospel, 737 00:44:03,052 --> 00:44:04,216 we don't have... Do you really think 738 00:44:04,251 --> 00:44:06,449 that the world's gonna end soon? 739 00:44:06,484 --> 00:44:08,451 Well, the Bible says that no one shall know the day 740 00:44:08,486 --> 00:44:09,991 or the hour, but, 741 00:44:10,026 --> 00:44:11,454 yeah, I think we're probably living in end times. 742 00:44:12,622 --> 00:44:14,028 And that doesn't bother you? 743 00:44:14,063 --> 00:44:15,425 No. It's the idea 744 00:44:15,460 --> 00:44:18,098 that a better world is coming to replace this one. 745 00:44:18,133 --> 00:44:20,496 That everything terrible about this country, 746 00:44:20,531 --> 00:44:22,366 this planet, is gonna be wiped clean, 747 00:44:22,401 --> 00:44:25,270 and replaced with something pure and holy, and... 748 00:44:25,305 --> 00:44:27,206 I'm sorry. I don't mean to be rude, 749 00:44:27,241 --> 00:44:29,109 but I know all this. 750 00:44:29,914 --> 00:44:31,177 What do you mean? 751 00:44:31,212 --> 00:44:33,443 I have probably read everything 752 00:44:33,478 --> 00:44:36,413 New Life Church has ever written. 753 00:44:36,448 --> 00:44:39,449 Probably every pamphlet they've ever published. 754 00:44:39,484 --> 00:44:41,957 Wow, that's great and everything, 755 00:44:41,992 --> 00:44:43,959 but these tracts are just the beginning. 756 00:44:43,994 --> 00:44:46,192 There's so much more in the Bible that we can... I read the Bible. 757 00:44:47,195 --> 00:44:48,524 Really? 758 00:44:48,559 --> 00:44:50,493 Sure. Couple times. 759 00:44:52,035 --> 00:44:53,496 Did you like it? 760 00:44:53,531 --> 00:44:56,037 I thought it was devastating. 761 00:44:56,072 --> 00:44:58,908 God creates us, expels us from paradise. 762 00:44:58,943 --> 00:45:01,911 We wander around for thousands of years killing each other, 763 00:45:01,946 --> 00:45:04,947 before He comes back and saves 144,000 of us. 764 00:45:04,982 --> 00:45:08,181 Meanwhile, seven- and-a-half billion of us fall into hell. 765 00:45:10,482 --> 00:45:12,515 Yeah. 766 00:45:12,550 --> 00:45:14,517 That's not really how I interpret it, but... 767 00:45:16,158 --> 00:45:17,960 Charlie, you have to understand, 768 00:45:19,029 --> 00:45:21,425 God hasn't turned His back on you. 769 00:45:21,460 --> 00:45:24,296 If you accept Him, He'll release you from this. 770 00:45:24,331 --> 00:45:25,660 (SIPPING) He'll take your soul 771 00:45:25,695 --> 00:45:28,036 out of this body and give you a brand-new body. 772 00:45:28,071 --> 00:45:30,203 One made of pure light. I mean, don't you want that? 773 00:45:30,238 --> 00:45:33,305 I'm not interested in being saved. 774 00:45:33,340 --> 00:45:34,977 (SIGHS) I appreciate what you did 775 00:45:35,012 --> 00:45:37,144 the other day, but you can go. 776 00:45:37,179 --> 00:45:38,673 This doesn't sound like something that I... 777 00:45:38,708 --> 00:45:41,445 Look, I really think that God brought me here for a reason. 778 00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:43,447 There's a reason why I knocked on your door 779 00:45:43,482 --> 00:45:45,482 right when you needed someone the most. 780 00:45:45,517 --> 00:45:48,518 Isn't there any way I can help? 781 00:45:48,553 --> 00:45:49,652 I mean, that's the entire reason 782 00:45:49,688 --> 00:45:51,686 why I became a missionary in the first place, right? 783 00:45:51,721 --> 00:45:53,358 There's something you can do for me. 784 00:45:57,595 --> 00:46:00,596 What? Um, nothing I just... 785 00:46:00,631 --> 00:46:05,007 I hope you know I wasn't talking about, um... 786 00:46:05,570 --> 00:46:07,702 What? I'm not... 787 00:46:07,737 --> 00:46:09,671 Oh, my God. I'm... I'm sorry. I just... 788 00:46:09,706 --> 00:46:11,079 No. With what you were watching 789 00:46:11,114 --> 00:46:12,179 the first time I came in here, I just... 790 00:46:12,214 --> 00:46:14,313 (CHUCKLES) I am not attracted to you. 791 00:46:14,348 --> 00:46:17,547 Please, you gotta believe me when I say I'm not attracted to you. 792 00:46:17,582 --> 00:46:18,614 You're a fetus. 793 00:46:21,421 --> 00:46:22,618 I'm sorry. 794 00:46:24,292 --> 00:46:25,357 (SIGHS) 795 00:46:29,462 --> 00:46:31,462 Thomas, tell me the truth. 796 00:46:34,467 --> 00:46:35,565 You find me disgusting? 797 00:46:39,010 --> 00:46:40,009 No. 798 00:46:42,574 --> 00:46:43,705 I just want to help. 799 00:46:44,741 --> 00:46:46,642 Please, just let me help. 800 00:46:56,126 --> 00:46:58,390 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 801 00:46:58,425 --> 00:47:00,491 Thank you. That's very helpful. 802 00:47:07,434 --> 00:47:10,039 What happened to your... Sorry. Your friend, Liz, 803 00:47:10,074 --> 00:47:12,503 she said that your boyfriend, 804 00:47:12,538 --> 00:47:14,439 he used to go to New Life? (DOOR OPENS) 805 00:47:17,048 --> 00:47:18,278 LIZ: Charlie? Yeah. 806 00:47:19,149 --> 00:47:21,116 I got you this. 807 00:47:21,151 --> 00:47:22,612 I did some asking around, and... 808 00:47:24,814 --> 00:47:26,616 What the fuck is he doing here? 809 00:47:26,651 --> 00:47:28,354 He's just helping me with something. 810 00:47:28,389 --> 00:47:29,718 Take it easy, Liz. 811 00:47:29,753 --> 00:47:32,127 Okay, well, you can go now. 812 00:47:32,558 --> 00:47:33,557 Liz. 813 00:47:34,725 --> 00:47:35,724 Go home! 814 00:47:37,068 --> 00:47:38,529 Sorry. I'm sorry. Leave it. 815 00:47:38,564 --> 00:47:40,564 (CHARLIE GRUNTS) I said, leave it! 816 00:47:40,599 --> 00:47:42,533 CHARLIE: Liz, would you stop? 817 00:47:44,471 --> 00:47:47,604 Actually, stay. We'll have a little chat. 818 00:47:51,643 --> 00:47:52,642 What's this? 819 00:47:54,118 --> 00:47:55,216 The fuck does it look like? 820 00:47:57,649 --> 00:47:59,649 It's a fat-guy wheelchair. 821 00:47:59,684 --> 00:48:01,651 And why do I need a wheelchair? 822 00:48:01,686 --> 00:48:04,786 I was talking to one of the ER doctors, 823 00:48:04,821 --> 00:48:08,130 He said moderate activity would be a good idea. 824 00:48:08,165 --> 00:48:09,725 Sense of independence might help you out. 825 00:48:09,760 --> 00:48:10,926 And what did you pay for this thing? 826 00:48:10,961 --> 00:48:13,366 Nothing. We ordered it for a patient a few months ago. 827 00:48:13,401 --> 00:48:14,499 It's just been sitting around. 828 00:48:14,534 --> 00:48:15,566 What happened to the patient? 829 00:48:17,108 --> 00:48:19,141 Just try it out. 830 00:48:19,176 --> 00:48:20,175 Please. 831 00:48:21,211 --> 00:48:22,375 (SIGHS) 832 00:48:23,114 --> 00:48:24,740 (GRUNTING) 833 00:48:27,679 --> 00:48:29,382 (EXHALES SHARPLY) 834 00:48:30,418 --> 00:48:33,815 Beep. Beep. Beep. 835 00:48:35,654 --> 00:48:38,556 (LAUGHING) 836 00:48:39,691 --> 00:48:41,295 CHARLIE: Can I sit? I gotcha. 837 00:48:42,496 --> 00:48:44,463 (CHARLIE GROANING) 838 00:48:47,138 --> 00:48:48,203 (CHUCKLES) 839 00:48:49,536 --> 00:48:51,536 Good? Yeah, actually, this is really nice. 840 00:48:54,178 --> 00:48:55,441 Yeah. 841 00:48:55,476 --> 00:48:57,179 Let me clear some space for you. 842 00:48:57,742 --> 00:48:58,741 CHARLIE: Whee. 843 00:49:00,349 --> 00:49:01,348 Hello? 844 00:49:06,487 --> 00:49:07,618 CHARLIE: Look, no hands. 845 00:49:09,589 --> 00:49:11,523 Thank you, Liz. This is great, so great. 846 00:49:11,558 --> 00:49:14,757 (CHUCKLES) See? I told you. CHARLIE: I know. 847 00:49:14,792 --> 00:49:16,528 I should go. Ah-pap-pap. 848 00:49:16,563 --> 00:49:17,760 Not until we have our little chat. 849 00:49:19,236 --> 00:49:20,763 What? LIZ: Come on. 850 00:49:27,475 --> 00:49:28,606 Liz. 851 00:49:28,641 --> 00:49:30,245 Just gimme a minute with him. 852 00:49:39,949 --> 00:49:41,520 (DOG BARKS IN DISTANCE) 853 00:49:57,769 --> 00:49:58,768 Where are you from? 854 00:50:00,277 --> 00:50:01,310 What? 855 00:50:01,345 --> 00:50:03,179 You said you've only been here for a little while. 856 00:50:06,382 --> 00:50:07,843 Where you from? 857 00:50:07,878 --> 00:50:11,220 Uh, Iowa. A town called Waterloo? 858 00:50:11,849 --> 00:50:12,881 You asking me? 859 00:50:13,785 --> 00:50:15,257 No. I'm from Waterloo. 860 00:50:15,688 --> 00:50:17,292 Okay. 861 00:50:17,327 --> 00:50:19,393 Your whole family move out here for New Life? 862 00:50:20,396 --> 00:50:21,857 No, it's just me. 863 00:50:21,892 --> 00:50:24,398 I wanted to do some missionary work before school. 864 00:50:24,433 --> 00:50:25,795 (CHUCKLES) 865 00:50:25,830 --> 00:50:28,237 You're from Iowa, 866 00:50:28,272 --> 00:50:31,537 and you came to Idaho to do missionary work? 867 00:50:31,572 --> 00:50:33,407 Why aren't you in Africa or something? 868 00:50:33,442 --> 00:50:35,244 Idaho needs the Word as much as anywhere else. 869 00:50:42,319 --> 00:50:43,912 Okay, listen. 870 00:50:43,947 --> 00:50:45,551 I know this is fun for you. 871 00:50:45,586 --> 00:50:46,750 You get to travel around, 872 00:50:46,785 --> 00:50:48,389 act superior than everyone else, 873 00:50:49,524 --> 00:50:50,820 and eventually, you go home, 874 00:50:50,855 --> 00:50:52,954 get some boring job, have too many kids. 875 00:50:52,989 --> 00:50:53,821 It's God's plan. 876 00:50:53,857 --> 00:50:57,233 But there are other types of people. 877 00:50:57,268 --> 00:50:58,498 People like Charlie, 878 00:50:58,533 --> 00:51:01,732 for whom this amazing plan doesn't fit. 879 00:51:02,801 --> 00:51:05,934 So, just stay away from him. 880 00:51:05,969 --> 00:51:07,408 He doesn't need this right now. 881 00:51:09,742 --> 00:51:11,478 I disagree. 882 00:51:11,513 --> 00:51:14,250 (EXHALES) Excuse me? Sorry, I just, uh... 883 00:51:14,285 --> 00:51:15,647 He's dying. 884 00:51:15,682 --> 00:51:17,286 He's refusing to go to the hospital. 885 00:51:17,321 --> 00:51:18,848 What he needs is spiritual guidance. 886 00:51:18,883 --> 00:51:20,355 And you're gonna give him that? 887 00:51:20,390 --> 00:51:22,390 No. God will. 888 00:51:25,021 --> 00:51:26,229 I see. 889 00:51:45,349 --> 00:51:47,448 My big brother did some missionary work for New Life. 890 00:51:49,518 --> 00:51:50,748 Went to South America. 891 00:51:51,553 --> 00:51:53,718 Oh. Yeah. 892 00:51:53,753 --> 00:51:54,719 I was the black sheep. 893 00:51:54,754 --> 00:51:57,359 I refused to go to church ever since I was 12. 894 00:51:58,395 --> 00:51:59,790 Dad knew I was a lost cause, 895 00:52:02,333 --> 00:52:06,335 but not my brother, he loved New Life. 896 00:52:06,370 --> 00:52:08,436 He wrote me a letter a few months after he left, 897 00:52:08,471 --> 00:52:10,570 told me he was tired, 898 00:52:10,605 --> 00:52:12,033 and lonely, but he didn't want to come home 899 00:52:12,068 --> 00:52:13,507 because he didn't want to get married. 900 00:52:14,543 --> 00:52:15,707 He didn't want to get married? 901 00:52:15,742 --> 00:52:17,511 Dad had set it all up. 902 00:52:17,546 --> 00:52:18,512 Pushed him into getting married 903 00:52:18,547 --> 00:52:21,911 to this girl from the church he barely knew. 904 00:52:21,946 --> 00:52:24,485 But when he came back, he met someone else. 905 00:52:24,520 --> 00:52:26,520 Fell in love, started a whole new life. 906 00:52:26,555 --> 00:52:29,589 And Dad kicked him out of the church. 907 00:52:30,493 --> 00:52:31,525 And the family. 908 00:52:33,397 --> 00:52:34,627 I thought he was gonna be able 909 00:52:34,662 --> 00:52:36,695 to get over all that religious stuff, 910 00:52:36,730 --> 00:52:39,995 but it was like a cancer. 911 00:52:40,030 --> 00:52:42,569 He couldn't shake it. 912 00:52:42,604 --> 00:52:44,406 He just caved in on himself, 913 00:52:44,441 --> 00:52:45,869 stopped sleeping, stopped eating. 914 00:52:45,904 --> 00:52:47,035 Lost a ton of weight. 915 00:52:48,742 --> 00:52:50,610 One night, he doesn't come home. 916 00:52:52,746 --> 00:52:54,647 Couple weeks later, this guy is out jogging 917 00:52:54,682 --> 00:52:56,484 on a bike path near the river in Lewiston, 918 00:52:56,519 --> 00:52:58,079 sees something washed up on shore, 919 00:52:58,114 --> 00:52:59,916 and that was Alan. 920 00:53:02,393 --> 00:53:04,558 The love of Charlie's life, and my brother. 921 00:53:06,056 --> 00:53:08,496 Oh. Yeah. "Oh." 922 00:53:08,531 --> 00:53:11,026 To this day, my dad won't admit it. 923 00:53:11,061 --> 00:53:13,567 Told the whole congregation Alan's death was... 924 00:53:15,505 --> 00:53:17,538 just an unfortunate accident. 925 00:53:20,169 --> 00:53:22,939 Denying him to the end. 926 00:53:31,950 --> 00:53:34,918 Look, I know that you don't trust me. 927 00:53:34,953 --> 00:53:37,591 And I know that I haven't known him for very long, 928 00:53:37,626 --> 00:53:40,561 but I really think that God brought me here, 929 00:53:40,596 --> 00:53:42,761 right when Charlie needs it the most. 930 00:53:42,796 --> 00:53:45,632 I just want him to be saved, that's all... You listen to me! 931 00:53:45,667 --> 00:53:46,996 He doesn't need saving! 932 00:53:48,164 --> 00:53:50,670 In a few days, he's probably going to be dead, 933 00:53:50,705 --> 00:53:53,134 so what he needs is for you to leave him alone. 934 00:53:53,169 --> 00:53:54,806 I'm the only one who can help him. 935 00:53:54,841 --> 00:53:56,137 You understand me? CHARLIE: Liz. 936 00:54:05,115 --> 00:54:06,653 (LIZ SIGHS) 937 00:54:10,186 --> 00:54:12,923 (CUTLERY CLACKING) 938 00:54:18,799 --> 00:54:20,634 (CHARLIE WHEEZES SOFTLY) 939 00:54:22,803 --> 00:54:24,165 (TV TURNS ON) 940 00:54:24,200 --> 00:54:27,069 You wanna watch some Maury? 941 00:54:28,644 --> 00:54:30,072 Sounds good, right? 942 00:54:30,107 --> 00:54:33,614 (INDISTINCT CHATTER ON TV) 943 00:54:33,649 --> 00:54:35,176 Actually, I got another night shift tonight. 944 00:54:35,211 --> 00:54:36,815 I better, uh... 945 00:54:36,850 --> 00:54:37,749 You good for the night? 946 00:54:39,853 --> 00:54:42,150 (SMACKS LIPS) I'll leave the remote here. 947 00:54:47,597 --> 00:54:49,124 (DOOR OPENS) 948 00:54:52,899 --> 00:54:53,931 (DOOR CLOSES) 949 00:54:56,001 --> 00:54:57,473 (LOCK CLICKS) 950 00:55:18,826 --> 00:55:20,188 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 951 00:55:22,764 --> 00:55:25,226 (LIGHT SWITCH CLICKING) 952 00:55:28,297 --> 00:55:29,571 (SIGHS) 953 00:55:36,173 --> 00:55:37,645 (SIGHS) 954 00:55:43,587 --> 00:55:45,983 (SNIFFING) 955 00:55:47,855 --> 00:55:50,053 (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 956 00:56:00,868 --> 00:56:01,867 (DOOR SHUTS) 957 00:56:12,209 --> 00:56:13,582 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 958 00:56:13,617 --> 00:56:15,012 MAN: Gambino's! 959 00:56:15,047 --> 00:56:17,047 Yeah. You can, uh... 960 00:56:17,082 --> 00:56:19,280 MAN: Money in the mailbox, leave it on the bench. 961 00:56:20,591 --> 00:56:21,887 Yeah. Thanks. 962 00:56:23,957 --> 00:56:24,956 MAN: I'm Dan. 963 00:56:27,697 --> 00:56:28,894 What? 964 00:56:28,929 --> 00:56:31,864 DAN: I just... My name, it's Dan. 965 00:56:33,769 --> 00:56:36,231 I've been coming here for a while now. 966 00:56:36,266 --> 00:56:38,266 Just thought you'd wanna know my name. 967 00:56:40,908 --> 00:56:41,940 Charlie. 968 00:56:43,240 --> 00:56:44,745 DAN: Hey, Charlie. 969 00:56:44,780 --> 00:56:47,077 (MAILBOX OPENS, CLOSES) 970 00:56:47,112 --> 00:56:48,309 DAN: Have a good night, okay? 971 00:56:49,114 --> 00:56:52,984 (FOOTSTEPS RECEDING) 972 00:56:56,924 --> 00:56:58,157 ...it sure did. 973 00:56:58,192 --> 00:57:00,728 More Idaho Republicans want to see Senator Ted Cruz 974 00:57:00,763 --> 00:57:02,664 in the White House than any other candidate. 975 00:57:02,699 --> 00:57:05,634 Cruz will split Idaho's 32 delegates 976 00:57:05,669 --> 00:57:06,969 with Donald Trump, 977 00:57:07,004 --> 00:57:10,232 the only other candidate to clear that 20% threshold. 978 00:57:10,267 --> 00:57:13,301 It was a disappointing night for Senator Marco Rubio 979 00:57:13,336 --> 00:57:15,204 who failed to win any delegates 980 00:57:15,239 --> 00:57:17,943 in the four states that held primaries, while... (SWITCHES TV OFF) 981 00:57:25,117 --> 00:57:26,985 (WHEELCHAIR SQUEAKING) 982 00:57:45,104 --> 00:57:46,939 "This apartment smells. 983 00:57:46,974 --> 00:57:51,009 "This notebook is retarded. I hate everyone." 984 00:57:52,782 --> 00:57:53,781 (SIGHS) 985 00:58:00,251 --> 00:58:03,087 (SYLLABICALLY) This apartment smells. 986 00:58:03,122 --> 00:58:07,223 This notebook is retarded. 987 00:58:07,258 --> 00:58:10,193 I hate everyone. (LAUGHING) 988 00:58:12,868 --> 00:58:14,263 (COUGHING, WHEEZING) 989 00:58:14,298 --> 00:58:16,870 (GRUNTING IN PAIN) 990 00:58:16,905 --> 00:58:18,399 (COUGHS) 991 00:58:18,434 --> 00:58:22,106 (BREATHING LABORIOUSLY) 992 00:58:23,780 --> 00:58:25,373 And I felt saddest of all 993 00:58:26,409 --> 00:58:28,277 when I read the boring chapters 994 00:58:29,478 --> 00:58:31,687 that were only descriptions of whales 995 00:58:32,481 --> 00:58:34,151 because (EXHALES) I knew 996 00:58:35,957 --> 00:58:38,760 that the author was just trying to save us 997 00:58:38,795 --> 00:58:40,289 from his own sad story, 998 00:58:41,490 --> 00:58:42,929 just for a little while. 999 00:58:44,768 --> 00:58:46,196 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 1000 00:58:46,231 --> 00:58:47,703 This apartment smells. 1001 00:58:50,037 --> 00:58:52,268 (INHALES DEEPLY) This apartment smells. 1002 00:58:55,306 --> 00:58:57,042 The author was just trying to save us 1003 00:58:57,077 --> 00:58:58,307 from his own sad story. 1004 00:58:59,981 --> 00:59:01,145 I hate everyone. 1005 00:59:05,481 --> 00:59:06,689 I hate everyone. 1006 00:59:12,422 --> 00:59:13,421 Do you have it? 1007 00:59:14,358 --> 00:59:15,390 CHARLIE: I'm almost done. 1008 00:59:17,867 --> 00:59:20,835 You can wait while I finish it up, 1009 00:59:23,301 --> 00:59:24,333 print it out. 1010 00:59:27,173 --> 00:59:29,173 Maybe while you're waiting, 1011 00:59:29,208 --> 00:59:32,077 you can write some more in your notebook. Oh, my God. 1012 00:59:32,112 --> 00:59:34,277 You've only written a couple sentences so far. 1013 00:59:34,312 --> 00:59:35,144 Can you write more? 1014 00:59:35,180 --> 00:59:37,181 I kind of hate you. (CHUCKLING) Yeah. 1015 00:59:37,216 --> 00:59:39,821 Well, you hate everyone. 1016 00:59:40,857 --> 00:59:42,450 Listen, just keep going. 1017 00:59:43,387 --> 00:59:44,386 Forget about the poem. 1018 00:59:44,422 --> 00:59:47,323 Write whatever you want, whatever you're thinking. 1019 00:59:47,358 --> 00:59:48,962 (BAG THUDS) Okay. Be quiet, just... 1020 00:59:59,535 --> 01:00:01,139 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 1021 01:00:05,849 --> 01:00:08,982 You know, I was in a really strange place in my life 1022 01:00:09,017 --> 01:00:10,951 when I married your mom. Did I fucking ask? 1023 01:00:12,152 --> 01:00:13,855 I just wish... 1024 01:00:13,890 --> 01:00:15,087 I'm sor... I'm sorry. 1025 01:00:25,495 --> 01:00:27,264 I understand that you're angry. 1026 01:00:28,432 --> 01:00:29,563 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 1027 01:00:29,598 --> 01:00:30,839 But... 1028 01:00:33,437 --> 01:00:37,945 you don't have to be angry at the whole world. 1029 01:00:41,346 --> 01:00:43,918 You can just be angry at me. 1030 01:00:43,953 --> 01:00:45,183 (AGGRESSIVELY) Okay, you know what? 1031 01:00:45,218 --> 01:00:47,449 You can't throw me away like a piece of garbage, 1032 01:00:47,484 --> 01:00:50,892 and then suddenly just want to be my dad eight years later. 1033 01:00:50,927 --> 01:00:53,829 You left me for your boyfriend. 1034 01:00:53,864 --> 01:00:55,831 (SIGHS) It's that simple. 1035 01:00:55,866 --> 01:00:57,426 And if you've been telling yourself anything different, 1036 01:00:57,461 --> 01:00:58,900 then you're lying to yourself. 1037 01:01:03,170 --> 01:01:04,369 But you know what? I'm glad. 1038 01:01:04,405 --> 01:01:07,436 I'm glad, because you taught me something very important. 1039 01:01:08,175 --> 01:01:10,945 People are assholes. 1040 01:01:12,014 --> 01:01:13,508 Most people learn that way too late. 1041 01:01:14,643 --> 01:01:16,984 You... You taught me that when I was eight. 1042 01:01:19,450 --> 01:01:20,823 Thank you for that. 1043 01:01:31,264 --> 01:01:32,362 You know, you could've... 1044 01:01:33,596 --> 01:01:35,464 What? 1045 01:01:35,499 --> 01:01:36,905 ELLIE: You could've been sending us money. 1046 01:01:39,074 --> 01:01:41,008 If you had all that money saved up, 1047 01:01:41,043 --> 01:01:42,273 and wanted to be a part of my life so bad, 1048 01:01:42,308 --> 01:01:44,044 you could've been sending money to Mom. 1049 01:01:44,079 --> 01:01:45,045 I did. 1050 01:01:45,080 --> 01:01:47,080 ELLIE: Yeah, I mean more than just child support. 1051 01:01:58,060 --> 01:01:59,092 I did. 1052 01:02:01,030 --> 01:02:04,493 When I left your mom, she did not want me around you. 1053 01:02:05,397 --> 01:02:07,001 I hoped 1054 01:02:07,036 --> 01:02:09,971 that she would change her mind eventually, but she... 1055 01:02:10,006 --> 01:02:11,599 You could have just fucking called me. 1056 01:02:13,141 --> 01:02:14,239 All this time, you... 1057 01:02:15,539 --> 01:02:17,275 You could have been a part of my life. 1058 01:02:19,147 --> 01:02:20,245 Ellie. 1059 01:02:22,117 --> 01:02:23,182 Look at me. 1060 01:02:29,355 --> 01:02:31,927 Who would want me to be a part of their life? 1061 01:02:44,073 --> 01:02:45,171 I'm hungry. 1062 01:02:47,241 --> 01:02:49,340 There's some stuff for sandwiches in the fridge. 1063 01:02:54,479 --> 01:02:56,314 I'll make you one, but it's going to be small. 1064 01:03:00,650 --> 01:03:02,353 And I'm only using turkey, 1065 01:03:03,191 --> 01:03:04,355 and no mayonnaise. 1066 01:03:09,725 --> 01:03:11,428 What? Nothing. 1067 01:03:12,695 --> 01:03:14,596 You're an amazing person, Ellie. 1068 01:03:14,631 --> 01:03:18,369 I hope you know what an amazing person you are. 1069 01:03:18,404 --> 01:03:21,570 I couldn't ask for a more incredible daughter. 1070 01:03:24,608 --> 01:03:26,278 I'll print that out for you now. 1071 01:03:33,254 --> 01:03:34,286 (BIRD WINGS FLAP) 1072 01:03:41,427 --> 01:03:42,998 (KEYBOARD CLACKING) 1073 01:03:46,762 --> 01:03:48,036 (GRATING) 1074 01:03:50,370 --> 01:03:51,369 (LIGHTER CLICKS) 1075 01:03:52,174 --> 01:03:54,174 (CHARLIE BREATHES HEAVILY) 1076 01:04:13,195 --> 01:04:14,326 (LIGHTER CLICKS) 1077 01:04:29,277 --> 01:04:30,639 (SNORES SOFTLY) 1078 01:04:30,674 --> 01:04:31,673 (PILLS RATTLE) 1079 01:04:48,362 --> 01:04:49,757 (DOOR CREAKS) 1080 01:05:15,488 --> 01:05:16,586 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 1081 01:05:20,823 --> 01:05:22,559 (KNOCK AT DOOR) ELLIE: Yeah? 1082 01:05:22,594 --> 01:05:24,297 THOMAS: Uh... Hello? 1083 01:05:27,269 --> 01:05:28,598 (KNOCKS) Hi. 1084 01:05:30,371 --> 01:05:31,370 ELLIE: Come on. 1085 01:05:32,637 --> 01:05:33,768 Is he... 1086 01:05:33,803 --> 01:05:34,902 Is he okay? I don't know. 1087 01:05:34,938 --> 01:05:37,376 I ground up some Ambien and I put it in his sandwich. 1088 01:05:37,411 --> 01:05:38,476 What? 1089 01:05:38,511 --> 01:05:40,181 I only gave him a couple. He's fine. 1090 01:05:40,216 --> 01:05:41,347 I can take, like, three at a time. 1091 01:05:41,382 --> 01:05:42,546 THOMAS: Where did you get Ambien? 1092 01:05:42,581 --> 01:05:43,712 I had sex with a pharmacist. 1093 01:05:45,716 --> 01:05:47,518 I'm kidding. Gross. 1094 01:05:47,553 --> 01:05:49,256 My mom pops them like Tic Tacs. 1095 01:05:49,291 --> 01:05:51,159 I don't know if he should be taking Ambien. 1096 01:05:53,625 --> 01:05:56,164 Does this make you nervous? 'Cause it's just pot. 1097 01:05:56,199 --> 01:05:57,891 It's not like I'm smoking meth or anything. 1098 01:05:57,926 --> 01:05:59,794 I know. I... I know what pot is, okay? 1099 01:05:59,829 --> 01:06:01,763 No. You only think you know what pot is 1100 01:06:01,798 --> 01:06:03,897 because your parents told you a bunch of lies about it. 1101 01:06:03,932 --> 01:06:05,569 Don't. I know what drugs are. 1102 01:06:05,604 --> 01:06:08,473 I've smoked pot before. Ooh. Oh, I'm so impressed. 1103 01:06:08,508 --> 01:06:10,277 I wasn't trying to impress you. 1104 01:06:10,312 --> 01:06:12,576 You've not smoked pot before. Yes, I have. It... 1105 01:06:14,580 --> 01:06:15,711 It was kind of a problem. 1106 01:06:16,879 --> 01:06:18,285 That is the stupidest fucking thing 1107 01:06:18,320 --> 01:06:19,152 I've ever heard in my entire life. 1108 01:06:19,188 --> 01:06:21,816 I was smoking every day. I had a problem. 1109 01:06:21,851 --> 01:06:24,918 You were a stoner. You had a hobby. 1110 01:06:24,953 --> 01:06:26,887 All right, I'm gonna go. Just tell him I was here and I'll... 1111 01:06:26,922 --> 01:06:29,329 If you leave, I'll feed him the rest of the pills I have in the bottle. 1112 01:06:29,364 --> 01:06:30,924 What? Yeah. 1113 01:06:30,959 --> 01:06:33,696 There's, like, 20, 30 more in here. 1114 01:06:34,633 --> 01:06:35,896 I'll crush them up, 1115 01:06:35,931 --> 01:06:37,931 I'll put them in some water, (PUTS BOTTLE DOWN) 1116 01:06:37,966 --> 01:06:39,339 and I'll pour it down his throat. 1117 01:06:40,276 --> 01:06:41,407 You wouldn't actually do that, 1118 01:06:41,442 --> 01:06:42,573 would you? Sit down. 1119 01:06:49,648 --> 01:06:50,812 So, why do you keep coming back here? 1120 01:06:52,981 --> 01:06:54,222 He needs help. 1121 01:06:55,357 --> 01:06:56,389 He needs God in his life right now. 1122 01:06:56,424 --> 01:06:57,489 That's a stupid reason. 1123 01:06:58,723 --> 01:07:00,888 Do you think he wants to have sex with you? 1124 01:07:00,923 --> 01:07:03,297 That is so gross, oh, my God. Take a hit. 1125 01:07:03,332 --> 01:07:04,694 I don't want... If you don't take a hit, 1126 01:07:04,729 --> 01:07:06,029 I'm gonna call the police 1127 01:07:06,064 --> 01:07:08,269 and I'm gonna tell them that you tried to rape me. Take a hit. 1128 01:07:10,669 --> 01:07:11,899 I don't understand you at all. 1129 01:07:12,539 --> 01:07:13,538 Oh, my God. 1130 01:07:14,871 --> 01:07:16,376 Is there a carb on this? 1131 01:07:16,411 --> 01:07:17,806 Ooh, I'm impressed. 1132 01:07:17,841 --> 01:07:19,544 I wasn't trying to impress you. 1133 01:07:19,579 --> 01:07:20,611 There isn't a carb. 1134 01:07:24,782 --> 01:07:25,946 (SIGHS) 1135 01:07:30,458 --> 01:07:31,622 (CAMERA CLICKS) (COUGHS) 1136 01:07:32,625 --> 01:07:33,724 Calm down. 1137 01:07:33,760 --> 01:07:35,428 (COUGHING) What are you gonna do with that picture? 1138 01:07:35,463 --> 01:07:36,792 I'm gonna masturbate to it. 1139 01:07:36,827 --> 01:07:37,925 Is that what you want me to say? 1140 01:07:37,960 --> 01:07:39,333 You're a pervert. Take another hit. 1141 01:07:41,337 --> 01:07:43,436 Look, I'm just fucking with you, all right? 1142 01:07:43,471 --> 01:07:44,899 I'm not gonna kill anyone, 1143 01:07:44,934 --> 01:07:47,935 I'm not gonna tell anyone that you tried to rape me. 1144 01:07:47,970 --> 01:07:49,541 You're not going to give him any more Ambien? 1145 01:07:49,576 --> 01:07:50,839 ELLIE: No. (PILLS RATTLE) 1146 01:07:50,874 --> 01:07:52,577 (ZIPS BAG) 1147 01:07:52,612 --> 01:07:54,282 Why do you keep coming back here? 1148 01:07:56,682 --> 01:07:58,418 I don't know. 1149 01:07:58,453 --> 01:07:59,947 Seriously, if you hate him so much, then why... 1150 01:07:59,982 --> 01:08:01,520 I'm done answering questions now. 1151 01:08:07,792 --> 01:08:08,890 Can I take another hit? 1152 01:08:10,696 --> 01:08:11,926 It goes against your religion, 1153 01:08:13,402 --> 01:08:14,566 and that makes you a hypocrite. 1154 01:08:16,570 --> 01:08:17,569 Go ahead. 1155 01:08:23,005 --> 01:08:24,279 (INHALES) 1156 01:08:26,547 --> 01:08:28,580 (CAMERA CLICKS) 1157 01:08:28,615 --> 01:08:29,812 I really wish that you wouldn't do that. 1158 01:08:29,847 --> 01:08:31,451 Yeah, I know. I heard you the first time. 1159 01:08:32,652 --> 01:08:33,651 Do you find me attractive? 1160 01:08:34,489 --> 01:08:35,686 (HESITATES) 1161 01:08:35,721 --> 01:08:37,622 Because I'm not attracted to you at all, 1162 01:08:38,394 --> 01:08:40,328 just to let you know. 1163 01:08:40,363 --> 01:08:41,527 I'm not trying to be mean or anything. 1164 01:08:41,562 --> 01:08:42,858 I just don't think you're very good-looking, 1165 01:08:43,828 --> 01:08:44,860 or interesting. 1166 01:08:45,599 --> 01:08:46,598 Or intelligent. 1167 01:08:46,897 --> 01:08:47,962 (SCOFFS) 1168 01:08:49,031 --> 01:08:50,470 Oh, my God, grow up. 1169 01:08:50,505 --> 01:08:51,801 Maybe someone else finds you attractive. 1170 01:08:51,836 --> 01:08:52,802 Maybe my dad finds you attractive. 1171 01:08:52,837 --> 01:08:54,903 I really wish you... You know, it is so easy 1172 01:08:54,938 --> 01:08:55,970 to make you uncomfortable. 1173 01:08:56,005 --> 01:08:57,642 It's honestly... It's a little sad. 1174 01:08:58,546 --> 01:08:59,545 You can cash that out. 1175 01:09:13,627 --> 01:09:16,529 (SCOFFS) If my parents knew I was getting high, 1176 01:09:16,564 --> 01:09:17,959 getting high while out witnessing for the church... 1177 01:09:17,994 --> 01:09:18,993 You're not from New Life. 1178 01:09:20,799 --> 01:09:21,865 What? 1179 01:09:21,900 --> 01:09:24,702 There's a kid in the grade below me who goes there. 1180 01:09:24,737 --> 01:09:25,835 He told me that they stopped doing 1181 01:09:25,870 --> 01:09:27,705 door-to-door stuff last year 1182 01:09:27,740 --> 01:09:29,938 when some woman was out preaching or whatever, 1183 01:09:29,973 --> 01:09:32,072 and a guy answered the door with no clothes on. 1184 01:09:33,515 --> 01:09:35,515 I gotta go. Who are you, really? 1185 01:09:37,046 --> 01:09:38,518 Come on, just tell me! 1186 01:09:39,752 --> 01:09:41,554 THOMAS: Why do you care? Because I think we have 1187 01:09:41,589 --> 01:09:42,786 a blossoming friendship. 1188 01:09:44,493 --> 01:09:45,657 You're just messing with me. 1189 01:09:47,056 --> 01:09:48,363 ELLIE: No, I'm not. 1190 01:09:49,564 --> 01:09:50,695 You're not going to tell anyone? 1191 01:09:52,435 --> 01:09:53,434 Who am I gonna tell? 1192 01:10:01,708 --> 01:10:02,773 I was on a mission. 1193 01:10:06,482 --> 01:10:08,482 With a group from my church, back in Waterloo, 1194 01:10:09,716 --> 01:10:10,979 my hometown in Iowa. 1195 01:10:12,455 --> 01:10:13,982 When my dad caught me smoking pot, 1196 01:10:14,017 --> 01:10:16,688 he thought a mission would be a good idea. 1197 01:10:16,723 --> 01:10:19,823 I mean, the truth is, he's just embarrassed by me 1198 01:10:19,858 --> 01:10:22,056 and wanted me gone for a while. 1199 01:10:22,927 --> 01:10:25,059 Anyway, I just left. 1200 01:10:28,504 --> 01:10:29,602 I couldn't do it anymore. 1201 01:10:31,639 --> 01:10:32,638 Why? 1202 01:10:33,773 --> 01:10:34,805 The mission leader, 1203 01:10:36,611 --> 01:10:37,577 this guy, Jerry, 1204 01:10:37,612 --> 01:10:39,172 all he had us doing was standing on corners 1205 01:10:39,207 --> 01:10:41,141 and handing out pamphlets. 1206 01:10:41,176 --> 01:10:42,615 The end of each day, he'd be like, 1207 01:10:42,650 --> 01:10:44,144 "Look how many people we're helping," but... 1208 01:10:45,015 --> 01:10:46,080 I tried to talk to him 1209 01:10:46,115 --> 01:10:47,481 about different ways we can minister. 1210 01:10:47,517 --> 01:10:50,821 I mean, different ways that we could actually help people. But... 1211 01:10:52,121 --> 01:10:54,594 You could just tell that he didn't need to earn 1212 01:10:54,629 --> 01:10:55,991 or prove his faith at all. 1213 01:10:59,128 --> 01:11:02,602 After a while, I was just, like, "Am I really helping?" 1214 01:11:03,836 --> 01:11:05,671 No. You were not. 1215 01:11:07,235 --> 01:11:08,905 Yeah, I started to feel that way, too. 1216 01:11:10,942 --> 01:11:11,841 I don't feel that way, 1217 01:11:11,877 --> 01:11:14,141 I know that you weren't helping people. 1218 01:11:14,176 --> 01:11:15,549 It doesn't help people to tell them 1219 01:11:15,584 --> 01:11:16,781 that they should believe in God. 1220 01:11:16,816 --> 01:11:17,881 Why would that help people? 1221 01:11:18,884 --> 01:11:20,653 THOMAS: I just thought... 1222 01:11:20,688 --> 01:11:22,622 I see all my family, my friends, 1223 01:11:24,153 --> 01:11:25,559 they're all just so happy. 1224 01:11:30,599 --> 01:11:31,796 I just want to be like that. 1225 01:11:34,031 --> 01:11:35,096 So, why'd you leave, then? 1226 01:11:36,803 --> 01:11:39,166 I was worried I was gonna get arrested. 1227 01:11:40,103 --> 01:11:41,102 For smoking pot? 1228 01:11:42,809 --> 01:11:44,006 For stealing from the mission. 1229 01:11:52,049 --> 01:11:54,984 One day, I ditched the pamphlets. 1230 01:11:55,019 --> 01:11:55,918 I went door-to-door. 1231 01:11:55,954 --> 01:11:57,921 I started actually engaging with people. 1232 01:11:57,956 --> 01:12:00,825 Finally. I mean, it felt like I was doing something, 1233 01:12:00,860 --> 01:12:01,925 helping someone. 1234 01:12:03,698 --> 01:12:05,632 (SCOFFS) 1235 01:12:05,667 --> 01:12:08,602 And that night, I went back to the mission meeting, 1236 01:12:08,637 --> 01:12:10,065 and I told everyone what I did that day, 1237 01:12:10,100 --> 01:12:12,001 and Jerry was like, "That's not what we do, buddy." 1238 01:12:12,036 --> 01:12:13,336 And I was like, "Well, why not?" 1239 01:12:13,371 --> 01:12:15,609 And we got in this huge argument in front of everyone, and... 1240 01:12:16,876 --> 01:12:17,908 (SIGHS) 1241 01:12:20,550 --> 01:12:23,716 And that night, I decided to leave. 1242 01:12:23,751 --> 01:12:25,784 And when everyone was asleep, I... 1243 01:12:25,819 --> 01:12:26,917 I took the petty cash. 1244 01:12:28,888 --> 01:12:29,953 ELLIE: How much? 1245 01:12:33,596 --> 01:12:35,629 $2,436. 1246 01:12:37,831 --> 01:12:39,160 Oh. 1247 01:12:39,195 --> 01:12:40,568 THOMAS: Yeah. "Oh." 1248 01:12:42,605 --> 01:12:43,404 I got on a bus. 1249 01:12:44,904 --> 01:12:46,772 Jerry and my parents were calling me 1250 01:12:46,807 --> 01:12:48,037 over and over again. 1251 01:12:49,810 --> 01:12:51,172 I just tossed my phone. 1252 01:12:53,847 --> 01:12:56,617 After a while, I wound up here. 1253 01:13:00,755 --> 01:13:02,689 THOMAS: I thought I could use this money 1254 01:13:02,724 --> 01:13:03,855 for my own mission. 1255 01:13:05,661 --> 01:13:08,222 You know, see my faith save just one person. 1256 01:13:09,962 --> 01:13:11,995 But now I'm almost out of money. I just... 1257 01:13:13,361 --> 01:13:15,636 I can't go home, and... 1258 01:13:15,671 --> 01:13:17,198 My parents probably wanna disown me. 1259 01:13:23,041 --> 01:13:24,205 (SIGHS) I don't know what to do. 1260 01:13:35,152 --> 01:13:36,756 You're more interesting to me now. 1261 01:13:39,794 --> 01:13:40,826 Thanks. 1262 01:13:53,643 --> 01:13:55,038 So, that's why you wanna save my dad. 1263 01:13:59,913 --> 01:14:00,912 (DOOR OPENS) 1264 01:14:06,051 --> 01:14:07,050 (CAMERA CLICKS) 1265 01:14:09,692 --> 01:14:10,691 (MAIN DOOR LOCK CLICKS) 1266 01:14:16,028 --> 01:14:17,192 Mom? 1267 01:14:17,227 --> 01:14:18,765 Don't freak out. Shut up. 1268 01:14:21,231 --> 01:14:22,263 LIZ: You again? 1269 01:14:23,134 --> 01:14:24,298 Charlie? 1270 01:14:24,839 --> 01:14:25,838 Charlie? 1271 01:14:27,974 --> 01:14:29,039 Charlie? 1272 01:14:30,339 --> 01:14:31,778 (SOFTLY) Charlie. 1273 01:14:38,853 --> 01:14:40,083 (CHARLIE COUGHS) 1274 01:14:44,320 --> 01:14:45,352 (LIGHTER CLICKS) 1275 01:14:46,454 --> 01:14:47,728 Not with the oxygen tank. 1276 01:14:49,963 --> 01:14:50,962 I'll stand by the window. 1277 01:14:52,735 --> 01:14:53,734 (LIZ SIGHS) 1278 01:14:57,971 --> 01:15:01,071 Ellie told you she was coming over? 1279 01:15:01,106 --> 01:15:02,809 LIZ: No. I did. 1280 01:15:02,844 --> 01:15:04,140 And just in time, looks like. 1281 01:15:05,308 --> 01:15:07,077 You having any more pain? 1282 01:15:07,112 --> 01:15:08,782 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 1283 01:15:08,817 --> 01:15:10,278 (SIGHS) How easy is it to move? 1284 01:15:11,149 --> 01:15:12,346 Not very. 1285 01:15:12,381 --> 01:15:14,920 Any confusion? Have you felt disoriented, 1286 01:15:14,955 --> 01:15:16,350 forgotten where you are or what you're doing? 1287 01:15:16,385 --> 01:15:19,991 Am I okay? No, you're not okay. 1288 01:15:20,026 --> 01:15:21,454 But as far as the sleeping pills, you're fine. 1289 01:15:21,489 --> 01:15:22,862 I don't think she gave you much. 1290 01:15:22,897 --> 01:15:24,028 Yeah, that's what I told you. 1291 01:15:26,230 --> 01:15:27,768 You know, I was a very angry, 1292 01:15:27,803 --> 01:15:28,969 very stupid little girl once, too, 1293 01:15:29,004 --> 01:15:30,705 but if you would've given him any more pills than that... 1294 01:15:30,740 --> 01:15:32,135 Yeah, but I didn't give him more pills than that, 1295 01:15:32,170 --> 01:15:33,840 I gave him two pills. Ellie? 1296 01:15:35,041 --> 01:15:36,271 How much money did he offer you? 1297 01:15:42,279 --> 01:15:44,279 All of it? How do you know about the money? 1298 01:15:45,084 --> 01:15:47,249 You think I'm an idiot? 1299 01:15:47,284 --> 01:15:49,152 You think I would believe that you were coming over here 1300 01:15:49,187 --> 01:15:50,417 out of the kindness of your heart? 1301 01:15:51,519 --> 01:15:54,894 (LAUGHS) Charlie doesn't have any money. 1302 01:15:54,929 --> 01:15:56,896 (LIZ CONTINUES LAUGHING) 1303 01:15:56,931 --> 01:15:58,766 She doesn't know? CHARLIE: Mary. 1304 01:15:58,801 --> 01:15:59,833 Where do you think all the money 1305 01:15:59,868 --> 01:16:00,867 from his teaching has been going? 1306 01:16:02,068 --> 01:16:03,232 The account for Ellie? 1307 01:16:03,267 --> 01:16:05,300 By now, it has to be huge. 1308 01:16:05,335 --> 01:16:06,972 Over $100,000 at least, right? 1309 01:16:08,877 --> 01:16:10,074 (WHEEZES SOFTLY) 1310 01:16:12,540 --> 01:16:13,946 That's not true, is it? 1311 01:16:17,886 --> 01:16:19,017 Charlie. 1312 01:16:20,383 --> 01:16:22,383 We could have gotten you anything you needed. 1313 01:16:23,859 --> 01:16:25,287 Special beds, physical therapists, 1314 01:16:25,322 --> 01:16:27,355 fucking health insurance! 1315 01:16:29,898 --> 01:16:31,293 Last winter, when my pick-up broke down 1316 01:16:31,328 --> 01:16:32,525 and I had to walk through the snow 1317 01:16:32,560 --> 01:16:33,900 to get your groceries for you... 1318 01:16:33,935 --> 01:16:35,330 I offered to get your truck fixed. 1319 01:16:35,365 --> 01:16:38,201 Yeah, and I refused because I thought you had $700 1320 01:16:38,236 --> 01:16:40,434 in your bank account. The money is for Ellie. 1321 01:16:41,844 --> 01:16:43,844 It's always been for Ellie. 1322 01:16:43,879 --> 01:16:46,242 If there was ever any kind of emergency, 1323 01:16:46,277 --> 01:16:48,145 I would have given you the money. Would you? 1324 01:16:52,118 --> 01:16:53,150 Wait. 1325 01:16:53,185 --> 01:16:55,889 (PANTING) 1326 01:16:57,057 --> 01:16:58,386 Wait. (DOOR SHUTS) 1327 01:17:01,490 --> 01:17:02,995 Mom, you're not getting any of my money. 1328 01:17:03,030 --> 01:17:04,029 MARY: Oh, shut up, Ellie. 1329 01:17:05,868 --> 01:17:07,461 Leave, right now. 1330 01:17:10,873 --> 01:17:12,206 Wait. 1331 01:17:12,241 --> 01:17:15,304 Ellie, I know you didn't mean to hurt me. I know you didn't... 1332 01:17:15,339 --> 01:17:16,943 Okay, you know what? Listen to me. Listen. 1333 01:17:16,978 --> 01:17:18,813 I don't care about you! 1334 01:17:18,848 --> 01:17:20,375 Get that through your fucking skull. 1335 01:17:20,410 --> 01:17:22,817 (CRYING) Ellie, please. Just fucking die already! 1336 01:17:23,347 --> 01:17:24,786 Enough! 1337 01:17:28,220 --> 01:17:29,483 Ellie, your... Your essay. 1338 01:17:33,258 --> 01:17:34,257 (OPENS DRAWER) 1339 01:17:37,900 --> 01:17:40,362 So... It's... 1340 01:17:43,334 --> 01:17:44,839 It's a really good essay! 1341 01:17:48,207 --> 01:17:50,075 (SOBS, WHEEZES) 1342 01:17:51,177 --> 01:17:52,506 (COUGHS) 1343 01:18:12,462 --> 01:18:14,495 (WHEEZES) Jesus, Charlie. 1344 01:18:22,439 --> 01:18:23,504 Do you have anything? 1345 01:18:27,917 --> 01:18:29,345 It's above the sink, 1346 01:18:29,380 --> 01:18:31,314 the kitchen counter on the left. 1347 01:18:33,384 --> 01:18:35,318 The other one. (SNIFFLES) Yup. 1348 01:18:37,388 --> 01:18:39,553 (COUGHING, WHEEZING) 1349 01:18:39,588 --> 01:18:41,456 MARY: Our deal was 1350 01:18:41,491 --> 01:18:43,425 to wait until she's out of the house to give her the money. 1351 01:18:44,362 --> 01:18:45,999 What's the difference? 1352 01:18:46,034 --> 01:18:50,003 The difference is she's 17 and still in high school. 1353 01:18:50,038 --> 01:18:52,940 She's gonna spend it on face tattoos or ponies, or something. 1354 01:18:52,975 --> 01:18:55,239 I think that she's a lot smarter than that. 1355 01:18:55,274 --> 01:18:56,471 (MARY SCOFFS) 1356 01:18:58,475 --> 01:18:59,474 So... 1357 01:19:02,578 --> 01:19:03,377 How's it been? 1358 01:19:05,020 --> 01:19:06,888 Getting to know her. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 1359 01:19:07,990 --> 01:19:10,320 She's amazing. (MARY CHUCKLES) 1360 01:19:10,355 --> 01:19:12,355 (SIGHS) You still do that. 1361 01:19:14,194 --> 01:19:15,193 What? 1362 01:19:16,130 --> 01:19:17,558 That positivity. 1363 01:19:19,298 --> 01:19:20,297 It's so annoying. 1364 01:19:21,333 --> 01:19:22,530 You're a complete cynic. 1365 01:19:24,138 --> 01:19:26,006 Just trying to balance us out. 1366 01:19:26,041 --> 01:19:28,041 Yeah. I guess I do miss that. 1367 01:19:29,242 --> 01:19:30,274 That one thing. 1368 01:19:31,706 --> 01:19:32,914 Just that? 1369 01:19:34,742 --> 01:19:37,017 That, and the cooking. 1370 01:19:37,052 --> 01:19:40,020 Last month, tried to make a stir-fry thing. CHARLIE: Yeah? 1371 01:19:40,055 --> 01:19:41,714 Almost set the entire apartment building on fire. 1372 01:19:41,749 --> 01:19:43,287 (LAUGHS) 1373 01:19:43,322 --> 01:19:45,190 (COUGHING) 1374 01:19:46,259 --> 01:19:48,259 (GASPS, COUGHS) 1375 01:19:48,624 --> 01:19:50,096 (GASPING) 1376 01:19:50,131 --> 01:19:54,067 (CONTINUES COUGHING) 1377 01:19:55,037 --> 01:19:56,234 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 1378 01:20:03,078 --> 01:20:04,704 I never knew you were doing this to yourself. 1379 01:20:06,312 --> 01:20:08,411 Well, you never asked how I was doing. 1380 01:20:09,744 --> 01:20:11,513 You never asked how I was doing either. 1381 01:20:12,747 --> 01:20:14,714 Every month, it's just, 1382 01:20:14,749 --> 01:20:17,585 "How much money do you need?" or, "How's Ellie?" 1383 01:20:17,620 --> 01:20:20,654 You didn't tell me that she's flunking out of school. 1384 01:20:20,689 --> 01:20:22,293 I guess I just didn't need the lecture 1385 01:20:22,328 --> 01:20:24,031 about my involvement in her education. 1386 01:20:24,066 --> 01:20:26,528 That is not what I... (EXHALES) 1387 01:20:29,632 --> 01:20:30,631 (EXHALES) 1388 01:20:32,569 --> 01:20:34,173 How're you doing, Mary? (SCOFFS) 1389 01:20:39,708 --> 01:20:43,116 I know I'm not supposed to be around her. 1390 01:20:43,151 --> 01:20:46,713 You could probably call the police if you wanted to. Oh, Christ. 1391 01:20:46,748 --> 01:20:48,253 You really think I'd do that? 1392 01:20:48,288 --> 01:20:51,058 You fought me pretty hard for full custody. 1393 01:20:51,093 --> 01:20:53,324 And I don't blame you for keeping her from me. 1394 01:20:53,359 --> 01:20:57,493 Charlie, need I remind you that you left us. 1395 01:20:58,265 --> 01:20:59,396 I know. 1396 01:20:59,431 --> 01:21:01,332 And I was left raising our kid 1397 01:21:01,367 --> 01:21:04,665 and explaining to people that my husband left me for a man. 1398 01:21:04,700 --> 01:21:07,239 But you didn't have to cut me out of her life like that. 1399 01:21:07,274 --> 01:21:08,407 Oh, please. 1400 01:21:08,442 --> 01:21:10,572 You were more than happy to forget about us for a while. 1401 01:21:10,607 --> 01:21:11,606 You know that. 1402 01:21:13,544 --> 01:21:15,511 I know I made a lot of mistakes. 1403 01:21:17,746 --> 01:21:20,681 But I just wanted to see her, Mary. 1404 01:21:20,716 --> 01:21:23,189 I've always just... Just wanted to see her. 1405 01:21:24,588 --> 01:21:25,653 It's all about you. 1406 01:21:27,492 --> 01:21:29,228 Even now, huh? 1407 01:21:29,857 --> 01:21:31,626 (CHARLIE SIGHS HEAVILY) 1408 01:21:31,661 --> 01:21:33,331 Now you know why I kept you from her. 1409 01:21:34,400 --> 01:21:35,399 What? 1410 01:21:37,139 --> 01:21:40,074 She's awful. Isn't she? 1411 01:21:40,109 --> 01:21:43,407 She's a terror. And you think it's my fault. 1412 01:21:43,442 --> 01:21:48,247 Wait, is that why you kept her from me all this time? 1413 01:21:48,282 --> 01:21:52,449 Because you thought that I would think that you're a bad mother? 1414 01:21:53,551 --> 01:21:54,550 At first. 1415 01:21:55,817 --> 01:21:58,818 But later, when she was 15, 16, 1416 01:22:01,163 --> 01:22:02,591 I was worried she would hurt you. 1417 01:22:03,231 --> 01:22:04,230 Hurt me? 1418 01:22:05,464 --> 01:22:06,562 It's ridiculous. 1419 01:22:06,597 --> 01:22:08,399 I don't take any pleasure in admitting it. 1420 01:22:08,434 --> 01:22:10,830 I'm her mother, for Christ's sake. 1421 01:22:10,865 --> 01:22:13,668 You know, I spent way too much time telling myself, 1422 01:22:13,703 --> 01:22:16,110 you know, "She's just rebellious, 1423 01:22:16,145 --> 01:22:17,276 "she's just difficult." 1424 01:22:19,643 --> 01:22:22,281 Charlie, she's evil. 1425 01:22:23,647 --> 01:22:24,811 She's not evil. 1426 01:22:31,556 --> 01:22:32,588 What are you doing? 1427 01:22:38,530 --> 01:22:40,134 (MARY TYPING) You think it's just me? 1428 01:22:51,840 --> 01:22:55,182 "There'll be a grease fire in hell when he starts to burn." 1429 01:23:02,620 --> 01:23:03,619 Don't feel bad. 1430 01:23:05,194 --> 01:23:07,326 I've made quite a few appearances on that thing. 1431 01:23:10,958 --> 01:23:12,331 She's a strong writer. 1432 01:23:14,500 --> 01:23:16,269 (RAISES VOICE) That's your response? 1433 01:23:16,304 --> 01:23:17,369 This isn't evil. 1434 01:23:17,866 --> 01:23:19,470 This is honesty. 1435 01:23:19,505 --> 01:23:21,901 Do you know how much bullshit I've read in my life? 1436 01:23:21,936 --> 01:23:24,772 My God, I don't understand you, Charlie! 1437 01:23:24,807 --> 01:23:26,807 Every time I call and ask you how she's doing, 1438 01:23:26,842 --> 01:23:28,182 you say, "She's fine." 1439 01:23:28,844 --> 01:23:30,415 If she's so evil, then... 1440 01:23:30,450 --> 01:23:31,944 (MARY SHOUTING) What was I supposed to tell you? 1441 01:23:31,979 --> 01:23:34,650 Huh? That she was off making her classmates cry 1442 01:23:34,685 --> 01:23:36,223 or slashing her teachers' tires? 1443 01:23:36,258 --> 01:23:37,521 You didn't want to hear that stuff! 1444 01:23:37,556 --> 01:23:38,655 I could have helped her! 1445 01:23:38,691 --> 01:23:42,229 She doesn't want your help! She doesn't want anyone! 1446 01:23:42,264 --> 01:23:44,231 You think I didn't want her to have a dad? 1447 01:23:44,926 --> 01:23:46,596 She adored you! 1448 01:23:46,631 --> 01:23:48,466 The only reason you married me in the first place 1449 01:23:48,501 --> 01:23:50,303 was to have a kid, I know that! 1450 01:23:50,338 --> 01:23:51,502 Mary, please! 1451 01:23:52,241 --> 01:23:53,306 (MARY SIGHS) 1452 01:23:57,378 --> 01:24:00,577 Well, this brings back memories, doesn't it? 1453 01:24:02,614 --> 01:24:03,712 (SIGHS) 1454 01:24:04,748 --> 01:24:06,286 (WHEEZES, COUGHS) 1455 01:24:19,763 --> 01:24:20,762 Listen. 1456 01:24:23,602 --> 01:24:25,536 I never got to say that I was sorry. 1457 01:24:27,441 --> 01:24:29,804 What would you have to be sorry about? 1458 01:24:29,839 --> 01:24:30,904 That's not what I mean. 1459 01:24:32,578 --> 01:24:33,577 I mean... 1460 01:24:38,353 --> 01:24:40,650 About your friend. 1461 01:24:42,016 --> 01:24:43,224 Oh. 1462 01:24:46,757 --> 01:24:47,822 His name was Alan. 1463 01:24:47,857 --> 01:24:49,527 I know his fucking name, Charlie. 1464 01:24:54,303 --> 01:24:55,302 I saw him once, 1465 01:24:56,899 --> 01:24:58,338 in the Walmart parking lot. 1466 01:24:59,308 --> 01:25:00,174 He wasn't looking too good, 1467 01:25:00,209 --> 01:25:02,243 and I don't think it was long before he... 1468 01:25:04,478 --> 01:25:06,907 Anyway, I had all these things that I... 1469 01:25:06,942 --> 01:25:07,941 I wanted to say to him, 1470 01:25:07,977 --> 01:25:09,844 you know, hurl at him like bricks. (SNIFFLES) 1471 01:25:10,616 --> 01:25:12,583 But I... 1472 01:25:12,618 --> 01:25:14,255 I asked if he wanted some help. 1473 01:25:16,721 --> 01:25:18,721 He let me carry a couple of bags to his car, 1474 01:25:20,021 --> 01:25:21,328 he said thank you, 1475 01:25:22,925 --> 01:25:23,924 and I left. 1476 01:25:27,765 --> 01:25:29,369 I never even told him who I was. 1477 01:25:32,968 --> 01:25:34,473 (WHEEZES SOFTLY) 1478 01:25:35,839 --> 01:25:37,443 (WHEEZING) 1479 01:25:38,479 --> 01:25:39,511 You're wheezing. 1480 01:25:40,877 --> 01:25:43,614 Yeah, it's gotten worse. 1481 01:25:44,518 --> 01:25:45,649 Should I call someone? 1482 01:25:46,388 --> 01:25:48,421 No. Um... 1483 01:25:53,692 --> 01:25:54,790 You'll let me hear? 1484 01:26:03,702 --> 01:26:04,866 (GRUNTS) 1485 01:26:19,718 --> 01:26:20,783 (HOARSELY) How do I sound? 1486 01:26:28,727 --> 01:26:31,057 That was the first time we've all been together 1487 01:26:31,092 --> 01:26:33,862 in almost nine years. Do you realize that? 1488 01:26:33,897 --> 01:26:35,028 (CHUCKLES DRYLY) 1489 01:26:43,643 --> 01:26:45,577 When Ellie was little, 1490 01:26:45,612 --> 01:26:49,350 when we took that trip to the Oregon Coast together, 1491 01:26:50,419 --> 01:26:52,485 Ellie played in the sand, and... 1492 01:26:52,850 --> 01:26:53,948 (SNIFFLES) 1493 01:26:53,983 --> 01:26:55,851 ...we laid out on the beach. 1494 01:26:57,184 --> 01:26:58,821 I went swimming in the ocean. 1495 01:27:01,496 --> 01:27:03,991 That was the last time I ever went swimming, actually. 1496 01:27:07,062 --> 01:27:09,502 I kept cutting my legs on the rocks. 1497 01:27:13,068 --> 01:27:15,068 The water was so cold. 1498 01:27:15,103 --> 01:27:16,575 (OCEAN WAVES SPLASHING) 1499 01:27:26,785 --> 01:27:30,589 And you were so mad that my legs bled 1500 01:27:30,624 --> 01:27:32,888 and stained the seats in the minivan. 1501 01:27:32,923 --> 01:27:34,156 (CHUCKLES) 1502 01:27:34,191 --> 01:27:38,795 And you said, for days after that, I smelled like seawater. 1503 01:27:38,830 --> 01:27:40,764 (CHARLIE LAUGHS) (SNIFFLES) 1504 01:27:40,799 --> 01:27:42,502 (WHEEZES) You remember that? 1505 01:27:42,537 --> 01:27:45,571 (COUGHING) 1506 01:27:46,574 --> 01:27:48,134 (SNIFFLES) 1507 01:27:50,072 --> 01:27:51,412 You sound awful. 1508 01:27:52,910 --> 01:27:55,108 (SIGHS) I'm dying, Mary. 1509 01:27:59,180 --> 01:28:00,179 Fuck you. 1510 01:28:02,117 --> 01:28:03,457 I'm sorry. 1511 01:28:04,922 --> 01:28:06,020 Fuck you. 1512 01:28:08,926 --> 01:28:10,057 (CRYING) For sure? 1513 01:28:10,928 --> 01:28:13,566 Yeah. For sure. 1514 01:28:13,601 --> 01:28:15,700 (CRIES, SIGHS) 1515 01:28:15,735 --> 01:28:16,932 CHARLIE: Listen to me. 1516 01:28:19,937 --> 01:28:22,476 I need to make certain that she's going to be okay. 1517 01:28:23,578 --> 01:28:24,775 We can't give up on her. 1518 01:28:25,613 --> 01:28:27,239 You already gave up on her! 1519 01:28:27,274 --> 01:28:29,208 You gave up on her when she was eight years old! 1520 01:28:29,243 --> 01:28:32,244 I wish I could have been a part of her life, Mary, 1521 01:28:32,279 --> 01:28:34,147 a part of both of your lives. 1522 01:28:34,182 --> 01:28:35,181 Go to the hospital. 1523 01:28:36,558 --> 01:28:38,789 You have money, just go to the hospital! 1524 01:28:39,858 --> 01:28:44,190 We both know that that money is for Ellie. 1525 01:28:45,193 --> 01:28:49,569 But beyond that, 1526 01:28:49,604 --> 01:28:53,672 I need to know that she's gonna have a decent life. 1527 01:28:54,807 --> 01:28:57,005 Where she cares about people 1528 01:28:57,040 --> 01:28:59,139 and other people care about her. 1529 01:29:00,648 --> 01:29:02,648 (CRYING) And she's gonna be okay. 1530 01:29:03,651 --> 01:29:04,617 I need to go. Mary. 1531 01:29:04,652 --> 01:29:08,181 She doesn't have anyone else! I have to go. 1532 01:29:08,216 --> 01:29:10,854 (CRYING) I need to know that I have done 1533 01:29:10,889 --> 01:29:13,692 one thing right with my life! 1534 01:29:17,258 --> 01:29:18,664 We both played our parts. 1535 01:29:20,162 --> 01:29:22,701 I raised her, and you're giving her the money. 1536 01:29:23,330 --> 01:29:24,637 It's the best we could do. 1537 01:29:26,707 --> 01:29:27,838 (SIGHS) 1538 01:29:30,711 --> 01:29:31,710 Do you need anything 1539 01:29:33,142 --> 01:29:34,174 before I leave? 1540 01:29:35,177 --> 01:29:36,517 Water, or something. 1541 01:29:37,751 --> 01:29:39,146 (COUGHS) 1542 01:29:44,351 --> 01:29:45,757 (SIGHS) 1543 01:29:46,056 --> 01:29:47,253 (COUGHS) 1544 01:29:58,673 --> 01:29:59,804 (PHONE BUTTON BEEPS) 1545 01:29:59,839 --> 01:30:02,235 (SNORING) (THUNDER RUMBLES) 1546 01:30:03,876 --> 01:30:05,843 (RAIN POURING) 1547 01:30:08,078 --> 01:30:10,617 (THUNDER RUMBLING) 1548 01:30:10,652 --> 01:30:12,047 (COUGHS) 1549 01:30:26,096 --> 01:30:27,667 (WATER TRICKLING) 1550 01:30:45,951 --> 01:30:47,280 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 1551 01:30:47,315 --> 01:30:48,952 DAN: Gambino's! 1552 01:30:48,987 --> 01:30:51,086 (CHARLIE COUGHING) Yeah. 1553 01:30:51,121 --> 01:30:52,120 DAN: Charlie? 1554 01:30:53,321 --> 01:30:54,320 You okay? 1555 01:30:56,126 --> 01:30:57,994 CHARLIE: Yeah. (CLEARS THROAT) 1556 01:30:59,668 --> 01:31:01,195 The money is in the, um... 1557 01:31:02,770 --> 01:31:03,802 DAN: Sure. 1558 01:31:03,837 --> 01:31:05,034 (MAILBOX OPENS) 1559 01:31:07,874 --> 01:31:09,236 DAN: You sure you're doing okay? 1560 01:31:11,339 --> 01:31:13,339 Yeah. Thanks, Dan. 1561 01:31:13,374 --> 01:31:15,176 DAN: Have a good night, okay? 1562 01:31:15,849 --> 01:31:16,947 (MAILBOX CLOSES) 1563 01:31:22,152 --> 01:31:24,086 (RAIN POURING HEAVILY) 1564 01:31:40,940 --> 01:31:41,939 (MUMBLES) 1565 01:31:54,888 --> 01:31:57,020 (INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING) 1566 01:32:09,199 --> 01:32:11,199 (BREATHING HEAVILY) 1567 01:32:16,844 --> 01:32:18,371 (THUNDER RUMBLING) 1568 01:32:25,479 --> 01:32:26,885 (TYPING) 1569 01:32:35,456 --> 01:32:37,093 (WHISPERING) Fuck these essays. 1570 01:32:38,162 --> 01:32:39,326 Fuck these readings. 1571 01:32:41,902 --> 01:32:46,003 Just write something fucking honest. (BANGING KEYBOARD) 1572 01:32:49,811 --> 01:32:50,810 (SLAMS LAPTOP SHUT) 1573 01:32:51,340 --> 01:32:52,339 (SIGHS) 1574 01:32:55,311 --> 01:32:57,443 (INTENSE MUSIC CONTINUES) 1575 01:33:40,026 --> 01:33:41,421 (RETCHES) 1576 01:33:41,456 --> 01:33:42,895 (SPITS) 1577 01:33:42,930 --> 01:33:44,831 (COUGHS, WHEEZES) 1578 01:33:45,526 --> 01:33:47,196 (GASPS) 1579 01:33:47,528 --> 01:33:50,397 (COUGHING) 1580 01:33:54,403 --> 01:33:56,238 (CONTINUES COUGHING) 1581 01:33:57,538 --> 01:33:58,911 (STIFLES SOB) 1582 01:33:59,441 --> 01:34:01,573 (SOBBING) 1583 01:34:01,608 --> 01:34:03,311 (COUGHS, SOBS) 1584 01:34:09,022 --> 01:34:11,253 (CONTINUES SOBBING) 1585 01:34:11,288 --> 01:34:12,793 (COUGHS) 1586 01:34:15,864 --> 01:34:17,028 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 1587 01:34:17,063 --> 01:34:18,392 (GASPS) Liz? 1588 01:34:20,264 --> 01:34:22,297 (KNOCKING CONTINUES) 1589 01:34:22,332 --> 01:34:23,463 THOMAS: Can I come inside? 1590 01:34:25,236 --> 01:34:26,268 It's not locked. 1591 01:34:28,536 --> 01:34:29,843 Hi. What's wrong? 1592 01:34:30,505 --> 01:34:32,010 Thank you. For what? 1593 01:34:32,045 --> 01:34:34,914 Look, I'm not exactly who I said I was. 1594 01:34:34,949 --> 01:34:36,542 I'm not from New Life. 1595 01:34:36,577 --> 01:34:38,148 What? I... I don't... 1596 01:34:38,183 --> 01:34:40,117 I've been in a pretty bad place recently. 1597 01:34:40,152 --> 01:34:41,514 I... I stole some money, 1598 01:34:41,549 --> 01:34:43,549 and I ran away from home a few months ago. 1599 01:34:43,584 --> 01:34:46,420 And your daughter, she took these pictures of me smoking pot, 1600 01:34:46,455 --> 01:34:48,862 and a recording or something like that, 1601 01:34:48,897 --> 01:34:51,062 and she found my church in Waterloo somehow, 1602 01:34:51,097 --> 01:34:52,261 and then she sent it to them, 1603 01:34:52,296 --> 01:34:53,999 and they sent it to my parents... Wait. 1604 01:34:54,034 --> 01:34:55,231 ...and you know what they said? 1605 01:34:56,168 --> 01:34:57,200 "It's just money." 1606 01:34:58,302 --> 01:35:00,203 And they forgive me. 1607 01:35:00,238 --> 01:35:03,008 And they love me, and they want me to come home. 1608 01:35:04,605 --> 01:35:06,143 How awful is that? 1609 01:35:07,245 --> 01:35:09,916 Ellie, she... She did all that? 1610 01:35:09,951 --> 01:35:14,184 I can't tell if she was trying to help me or hurt me or... 1611 01:35:14,219 --> 01:35:15,515 Do you ever get that feeling from her? (CHUCKLES) 1612 01:35:15,550 --> 01:35:17,187 How did she even... She... 1613 01:35:19,059 --> 01:35:21,928 She found your church, she tracked down your parents. 1614 01:35:23,261 --> 01:35:24,557 She really did all that? 1615 01:35:24,592 --> 01:35:26,295 Yeah. I mean, I'm going home tomorrow. 1616 01:35:27,397 --> 01:35:29,034 But, Charlie, before I go... (LAUGHS) 1617 01:35:29,069 --> 01:35:30,464 ...I have to show you this. 1618 01:35:30,499 --> 01:35:32,400 (BREATHES UNCOMFORTABLY) 1619 01:35:32,435 --> 01:35:34,039 What... What's wrong? (GRUNTS HEAVILY) 1620 01:35:34,074 --> 01:35:35,304 Wait, are you okay? 1621 01:35:35,339 --> 01:35:37,339 It just hurts. Charlie, 1622 01:35:37,374 --> 01:35:39,605 I want to help you. I know I can help you. 1623 01:35:39,640 --> 01:35:41,541 I'm not going to the hospital. 1624 01:35:41,576 --> 01:35:43,081 No, I know. I'm not gonna make you go. 1625 01:35:43,116 --> 01:35:44,379 But I can help you. 1626 01:35:46,350 --> 01:35:47,954 "Therefore, brothers and sisters..." What are you doing? 1627 01:35:47,989 --> 01:35:49,285 "...we have an obligation, 1628 01:35:49,320 --> 01:35:51,518 "but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. 1629 01:35:51,553 --> 01:35:54,290 "For if you live according to the flesh, you will die. 1630 01:35:54,325 --> 01:35:56,655 "But if by the Spirit you put to death 1631 01:35:56,690 --> 01:35:59,262 "the misdeeds of the body, then you will live." 1632 01:35:59,297 --> 01:36:01,165 I... I don't understand. 1633 01:36:01,200 --> 01:36:04,102 Charlie, when I read this, I finally got it. 1634 01:36:04,137 --> 01:36:07,468 I finally understood why God brought me here to you. 1635 01:36:07,503 --> 01:36:09,635 So I could help you understand what happened to Alan, 1636 01:36:09,670 --> 01:36:11,175 so it doesn't happen to you, too. 1637 01:36:14,213 --> 01:36:15,146 How did you get this? 1638 01:36:15,181 --> 01:36:18,578 Charlie, Alan tried to escape God's will. 1639 01:36:18,613 --> 01:36:20,987 He chose his life with you over God. 1640 01:36:21,022 --> 01:36:24,584 But this is why he was so obsessed with this verse. 1641 01:36:24,619 --> 01:36:26,388 He knew that he was living in the flesh, 1642 01:36:26,423 --> 01:36:27,656 and not in the Spirit. 1643 01:36:27,691 --> 01:36:31,030 He never prayed for salvation, but it's not too late for you. 1644 01:36:31,065 --> 01:36:32,625 Through the Spirit, you can put to death 1645 01:36:32,660 --> 01:36:35,001 the misdeeds of the body, and you will live. 1646 01:36:36,598 --> 01:36:39,137 You think Alan died because he chose to be with me? 1647 01:36:41,438 --> 01:36:43,075 You think God turned his back on him 1648 01:36:43,110 --> 01:36:44,274 because he and I were in love? 1649 01:36:48,511 --> 01:36:49,510 Yes. 1650 01:36:54,418 --> 01:36:55,351 (SIGHS) 1651 01:36:58,125 --> 01:37:00,422 You know something? I wasn't always this big. 1652 01:37:01,788 --> 01:37:04,063 Yeah, I know. 1653 01:37:04,098 --> 01:37:06,395 I mean, I wasn't the best-looking guy in the room, but... 1654 01:37:08,102 --> 01:37:09,101 Alan loved me. 1655 01:37:12,172 --> 01:37:13,270 He thought I was beautiful. 1656 01:37:17,804 --> 01:37:19,012 Okay. 1657 01:37:21,214 --> 01:37:22,983 Halfway through the semester, 1658 01:37:24,415 --> 01:37:28,054 he started meeting me during my office hours. 1659 01:37:28,089 --> 01:37:32,256 And we were... We were crazy about one another. 1660 01:37:32,291 --> 01:37:34,324 But we waited 1661 01:37:34,359 --> 01:37:37,096 until the class was over before... 1662 01:37:37,131 --> 01:37:38,164 This isn't, uh... 1663 01:37:38,199 --> 01:37:41,529 It was just after classes had ended for the year. 1664 01:37:41,564 --> 01:37:43,465 It was perfect temperature outside. 1665 01:37:44,534 --> 01:37:46,435 We took a walk in the arboretum, 1666 01:37:49,077 --> 01:37:50,109 and we kissed. 1667 01:37:50,606 --> 01:37:52,375 Charlie, stop. 1668 01:37:52,410 --> 01:37:55,741 We would spend entire nights lying together, naked. 1669 01:37:58,350 --> 01:37:59,448 We would make love. 1670 01:38:05,159 --> 01:38:06,257 We would make love. 1671 01:38:09,526 --> 01:38:11,196 Do you find that disgusting? 1672 01:38:11,231 --> 01:38:12,824 Charlie, God is ready to help you. 1673 01:38:12,859 --> 01:38:16,399 Oh, I hope that there isn't a God, 1674 01:38:16,434 --> 01:38:19,138 because I hate to think that there's an afterlife, 1675 01:38:19,173 --> 01:38:22,636 and that Alan can see what I have done to myself. 1676 01:38:22,671 --> 01:38:25,738 Charlie... That he can see my swollen feet 1677 01:38:25,773 --> 01:38:27,641 and the sores on my skin, 1678 01:38:27,676 --> 01:38:29,115 and the patches of mold 1679 01:38:29,150 --> 01:38:30,413 in between the flaps. Stop. 1680 01:38:30,448 --> 01:38:32,481 The infected ulcers on my ass, 1681 01:38:32,516 --> 01:38:36,188 and the sack of fat on my back that turned brown last year. 1682 01:38:36,223 --> 01:38:38,190 Okay, stop! This is disgusting? 1683 01:38:38,225 --> 01:38:40,291 Yes! I'm disgusting? 1684 01:38:40,326 --> 01:38:42,194 (SHOUTING) Yes, you're disgusting! You're... 1685 01:38:53,636 --> 01:38:55,405 (BREATH SHUDDERING, WHISPERING) I'm sorry. 1686 01:38:59,213 --> 01:39:00,212 What? 1687 01:39:03,547 --> 01:39:05,547 Go home to your family. 1688 01:39:16,230 --> 01:39:18,428 (CHARLIE COUGHS) (DOOR OPENS) 1689 01:39:19,827 --> 01:39:24,137 (DOOR CLOSES) (CONTINUES COUGHING) 1690 01:39:25,800 --> 01:39:27,437 (COUGHS HEAVILY) 1691 01:39:54,763 --> 01:39:57,632 CHARLIE: Well, your complaints have been heard. 1692 01:39:58,470 --> 01:39:59,634 I've been replaced 1693 01:39:59,669 --> 01:40:01,801 by someone who will, no doubt, 1694 01:40:01,836 --> 01:40:05,277 have you rewrite, and rewrite, and rewrite, 1695 01:40:05,741 --> 01:40:08,247 be more objective, 1696 01:40:08,909 --> 01:40:10,315 less authentic, 1697 01:40:10,350 --> 01:40:12,845 less you, with every draft. 1698 01:40:15,817 --> 01:40:19,522 But some of you saw my post 1699 01:40:19,557 --> 01:40:22,492 about writing something honest. 1700 01:40:25,827 --> 01:40:26,826 And... 1701 01:40:28,236 --> 01:40:29,235 (SIGHS) 1702 01:40:30,370 --> 01:40:32,172 ...the things that some of you wrote... 1703 01:40:34,000 --> 01:40:35,439 Kristy, you wrote, 1704 01:40:36,541 --> 01:40:39,608 "My parents want me to be a radiologist, 1705 01:40:39,643 --> 01:40:42,248 "but I don't even know what that is." 1706 01:40:48,784 --> 01:40:50,322 Julian, you wrote, 1707 01:40:50,357 --> 01:40:53,655 "I'm sick of people telling me that I have promise." 1708 01:41:01,467 --> 01:41:02,532 Adam, you wrote, 1709 01:41:03,700 --> 01:41:05,601 "I think I need to accept that my life 1710 01:41:05,636 --> 01:41:07,966 "isn't going to be very exciting." 1711 01:41:11,312 --> 01:41:15,677 You all wrote these amazing, honest things, and... 1712 01:41:17,813 --> 01:41:19,912 you've been so honest with me that I... I... 1713 01:41:23,489 --> 01:41:24,620 (GRUNTS SOFTLY) 1714 01:41:25,590 --> 01:41:26,919 ...I just want to be... 1715 01:41:28,494 --> 01:41:29,889 honest with you, too. 1716 01:41:30,958 --> 01:41:32,298 (EXHALES) 1717 01:41:35,765 --> 01:41:37,798 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 1718 01:42:05,498 --> 01:42:06,728 (SIGHS HEAVILY) 1719 01:42:12,098 --> 01:42:13,801 These assignments don't matter. 1720 01:42:15,607 --> 01:42:16,837 This course doesn't matter. 1721 01:42:18,973 --> 01:42:20,313 College doesn't matter. 1722 01:42:22,647 --> 01:42:25,582 These amazing, honest things that you wrote, 1723 01:42:29,621 --> 01:42:30,719 they matter. 1724 01:42:34,758 --> 01:42:35,856 (LAPTOP CRASHES) 1725 01:42:38,091 --> 01:42:39,959 (CHARLIE WHEEZES) 1726 01:42:50,103 --> 01:42:51,509 (CHARLIE COUGHS) 1727 01:43:06,086 --> 01:43:07,954 (WHEEZING CONTINUES) 1728 01:43:12,158 --> 01:43:13,795 I'm sorry. Don't. 1729 01:43:20,540 --> 01:43:22,034 (BREATHES ERRATICALLY) 1730 01:43:25,105 --> 01:43:26,478 (SUPPRESSES GRUNT) 1731 01:43:30,418 --> 01:43:32,847 I really hate you for putting me through this again, you know that? 1732 01:43:35,984 --> 01:43:37,522 Those last few months before Alan... 1733 01:43:39,020 --> 01:43:41,526 I'd come over here, shake him, scream at him, 1734 01:43:41,561 --> 01:43:43,561 just trying to get him to fucking eat something. 1735 01:43:43,596 --> 01:43:46,124 God, that was awful! It was awful for me, too. 1736 01:43:46,159 --> 01:43:47,532 Yeah? Well, you weren't the one 1737 01:43:47,567 --> 01:43:48,962 who had to identify his body, 1738 01:43:48,997 --> 01:43:50,700 all bloated... They wouldn't let me. 1739 01:43:52,165 --> 01:43:53,571 I wasn't family. 1740 01:43:55,135 --> 01:43:56,442 (SIGHS) 1741 01:44:02,714 --> 01:44:04,714 (CHARLIE COUGHS AND WHEEZES) 1742 01:44:07,719 --> 01:44:09,818 I got you two meatball subs. Extra cheese. 1743 01:44:15,188 --> 01:44:16,924 (SIGHS, SNIFFLES) 1744 01:44:16,959 --> 01:44:18,090 I don't know what I'm doing. 1745 01:44:24,571 --> 01:44:26,802 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 1746 01:44:26,837 --> 01:44:28,969 I'm not going to the hospital. 1747 01:44:29,004 --> 01:44:30,542 I'm not asking you to. 1748 01:44:35,945 --> 01:44:37,780 I can't do this anymore. 1749 01:44:40,884 --> 01:44:42,620 I tried to save him, Liz. 1750 01:44:45,889 --> 01:44:47,823 I thought that if I just loved him, 1751 01:44:50,762 --> 01:44:52,564 that he wouldn't need anyone else. 1752 01:44:55,536 --> 01:44:56,964 I told him he didn't need God, 1753 01:44:58,264 --> 01:45:01,606 he didn't need anyone but me. 1754 01:45:03,511 --> 01:45:04,510 Charlie, 1755 01:45:05,975 --> 01:45:07,777 all I know is that you gave Alan 1756 01:45:07,812 --> 01:45:09,042 the best years of his life. 1757 01:45:09,077 --> 01:45:10,648 If it weren't for you, he would have jumped off 1758 01:45:10,683 --> 01:45:12,650 that bridge years earlier. (SHUDDERS) 1759 01:45:13,246 --> 01:45:14,619 Nobody could've saved him. 1760 01:45:14,654 --> 01:45:16,522 Believe me, I spent years trying. 1761 01:45:17,151 --> 01:45:18,788 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 1762 01:45:20,561 --> 01:45:23,155 I don't think I believe anyone can save anyone. 1763 01:45:29,636 --> 01:45:30,701 She saved him. 1764 01:45:33,167 --> 01:45:37,268 She wasn't trying to hurt him. She was trying to help him. 1765 01:45:37,303 --> 01:45:39,237 Who are you talking about? 1766 01:45:39,272 --> 01:45:41,712 He's going home. She did that. 1767 01:45:42,979 --> 01:45:45,078 Charlie... She didn't do it to hurt him, 1768 01:45:45,883 --> 01:45:48,114 she did it to send him home. 1769 01:45:49,689 --> 01:45:52,019 Do you feel light-headed? Charlie, look at me. 1770 01:45:52,054 --> 01:45:54,659 She was trying to help him. Who? 1771 01:45:55,728 --> 01:45:59,257 Ellie. She was trying to help him, 1772 01:45:59,292 --> 01:46:01,193 She just wanted to send him home. 1773 01:46:03,901 --> 01:46:07,738 Do you ever get the feeling that... 1774 01:46:09,643 --> 01:46:13,007 people are incapable of not caring? 1775 01:46:18,586 --> 01:46:20,014 People are amazing. 1776 01:46:21,589 --> 01:46:22,621 (DOOR OPENS) 1777 01:46:23,723 --> 01:46:24,788 What the fuck did you do? 1778 01:46:27,925 --> 01:46:28,957 What's wrong with him? 1779 01:46:31,126 --> 01:46:32,125 He's dying. 1780 01:46:34,030 --> 01:46:35,700 So, call someone. 1781 01:46:35,735 --> 01:46:37,570 (SOFTLY) No. Call a fucking ambulance! 1782 01:46:38,199 --> 01:46:39,198 Liz. 1783 01:46:40,201 --> 01:46:41,607 I need to talk to him. 1784 01:46:41,642 --> 01:46:42,872 I'm not leaving you alone with him. 1785 01:46:42,907 --> 01:46:44,335 I need to talk to him alone. 1786 01:46:44,370 --> 01:46:45,578 (SOFTLY) Liz. 1787 01:46:48,374 --> 01:46:49,615 Please. 1788 01:46:54,182 --> 01:46:55,181 Okay. 1789 01:47:01,794 --> 01:47:03,596 (STIFLED SOBBING) 1790 01:47:12,937 --> 01:47:14,068 LIZ: I'll call someone. 1791 01:47:17,007 --> 01:47:18,006 Charlie. 1792 01:47:21,143 --> 01:47:22,747 I'll wait downstairs. 1793 01:47:30,218 --> 01:47:32,218 Why did you do that? (CHUCKLING) What? 1794 01:47:34,662 --> 01:47:35,661 I failed. 1795 01:47:36,290 --> 01:47:37,894 It's a really good essay. 1796 01:47:37,929 --> 01:47:40,864 Are you just trying to screw me over one last time? 1797 01:47:40,899 --> 01:47:42,899 I don't care about you! I don't care that you're dying. 1798 01:47:42,934 --> 01:47:44,263 Do you want me to fail out of high school? 1799 01:47:44,298 --> 01:47:46,265 Is that why you did this? I didn't write it. 1800 01:47:46,300 --> 01:47:48,806 This is the essay that you gave me yesterday. 1801 01:47:48,841 --> 01:47:50,676 You didn't read it. I don't need to read it. 1802 01:47:51,140 --> 01:47:52,139 Read it. 1803 01:47:56,277 --> 01:47:58,178 (BREATHING LABORIOUSLY) 1804 01:48:03,757 --> 01:48:04,756 This is... 1805 01:48:06,155 --> 01:48:07,693 I know what this is. 1806 01:48:07,728 --> 01:48:09,794 (CHUCKLING) I knew you would. 1807 01:48:10,863 --> 01:48:11,862 I wrote this. 1808 01:48:14,130 --> 01:48:15,866 You never forget anything. 1809 01:48:15,901 --> 01:48:18,770 I wrote this in eighth grade for English. Why do you... 1810 01:48:18,805 --> 01:48:20,871 "And I felt saddest of all 1811 01:48:20,906 --> 01:48:23,137 "when I read the boring chapters 1812 01:48:23,172 --> 01:48:26,008 "that were only descriptions of whales, 1813 01:48:26,043 --> 01:48:29,044 "because I knew that 1814 01:48:29,079 --> 01:48:32,718 "the author was just trying to save us 1815 01:48:32,753 --> 01:48:35,017 "from his own sad story, 1816 01:48:37,021 --> 01:48:38,889 "just for a little while." 1817 01:48:38,924 --> 01:48:40,693 (CHARLIE CHUCKLES) (SNIFFLES) 1818 01:48:40,728 --> 01:48:43,388 How do you have this? Your mother, 1819 01:48:43,423 --> 01:48:45,456 she sent it to me four years ago. 1820 01:48:45,491 --> 01:48:48,228 I wanted to know how you were doing in school, 1821 01:48:48,263 --> 01:48:50,032 and she sent it. 1822 01:48:50,067 --> 01:48:53,299 And it's the best essay I've ever read. 1823 01:48:53,334 --> 01:48:55,037 (SOBBING) Why are you fucking with me like this? 1824 01:48:56,007 --> 01:48:57,006 I'm not. 1825 01:48:58,075 --> 01:49:01,439 (SOBS) I'm sorry for leaving you. 1826 01:49:03,784 --> 01:49:07,181 I was in love, and... 1827 01:49:07,216 --> 01:49:09,084 (INHALES LABORIOUSLY) I left you behind. 1828 01:49:11,022 --> 01:49:14,386 You did not deserve that. I don't... 1829 01:49:14,421 --> 01:49:16,861 I don't know how (INHALES LABORIOUSLY) 1830 01:49:16,896 --> 01:49:18,797 I could have done such a thing. 1831 01:49:18,832 --> 01:49:21,096 You're so beautiful. (SOBS) 1832 01:49:21,131 --> 01:49:23,032 You're amazing. Stop. 1833 01:49:25,333 --> 01:49:28,070 You're amazing. (SOBS) 1834 01:49:28,908 --> 01:49:31,040 This essay is amazing. 1835 01:49:32,813 --> 01:49:35,275 This essay is you. 1836 01:49:35,310 --> 01:49:36,441 Stop saying that. 1837 01:49:36,476 --> 01:49:40,082 This essay is you. Stop saying that! 1838 01:49:40,117 --> 01:49:43,217 You're the best thing I have ever done. 1839 01:49:43,252 --> 01:49:44,790 (CRIES OUT IN PAIN) 1840 01:49:44,825 --> 01:49:46,924 (COUGHS) What's the matter? 1841 01:49:46,959 --> 01:49:47,991 Ellie! 1842 01:49:48,026 --> 01:49:49,960 No. Okay, I can't be here right now. 1843 01:49:49,995 --> 01:49:51,357 I have to go. You're perfect. 1844 01:49:51,964 --> 01:49:53,095 You'll be happy. 1845 01:49:54,428 --> 01:49:57,297 You care about people. (SOBS) 1846 01:49:57,332 --> 01:49:58,969 The ambulance is coming, they'll help you. 1847 01:49:59,004 --> 01:50:00,432 No. They won't. 1848 01:50:00,467 --> 01:50:03,336 You're going to the hospital. No. 1849 01:50:03,371 --> 01:50:05,404 You just need surgery, or something! 1850 01:50:05,439 --> 01:50:09,375 Read it to me. (GRUNTS) What? 1851 01:50:09,410 --> 01:50:12,917 (STRUGGLING) If you want to help, read it to me. 1852 01:50:13,920 --> 01:50:16,888 You'll help if you read it. 1853 01:50:16,923 --> 01:50:19,187 You asshole. You fat fucking asshole! 1854 01:50:19,222 --> 01:50:20,254 You'll help... Fuck you. 1855 01:50:20,289 --> 01:50:21,552 Please. Fuck you! 1856 01:50:21,587 --> 01:50:22,861 Ellie! 1857 01:50:26,295 --> 01:50:27,492 (SOBBING) Daddy, please. 1858 01:50:35,535 --> 01:50:37,073 (ELLIE SNIFFLING) 1859 01:50:46,480 --> 01:50:50,086 "In the amazing book, Moby Dick, by the author Herman Melville, 1860 01:50:50,121 --> 01:50:53,023 "the author recounts his story of being at sea. 1861 01:50:53,058 --> 01:50:54,387 "In the first part of his book, 1862 01:50:54,422 --> 01:50:56,422 "the author, calling himself Ishmael, 1863 01:50:56,457 --> 01:50:58,193 "is in a small seaside town 1864 01:50:58,228 --> 01:51:01,262 "and he is sharing a bed with a man named Queequeg. 1865 01:51:01,297 --> 01:51:03,594 "The author and Queequeg go to church 1866 01:51:03,629 --> 01:51:05,068 "and later set out on a ship 1867 01:51:05,103 --> 01:51:06,531 "captained by a pirate named Ahab, 1868 01:51:06,566 --> 01:51:07,972 "who is missing a leg, 1869 01:51:09,008 --> 01:51:10,601 "and very much wants to kill the whale 1870 01:51:10,636 --> 01:51:13,879 "which is named Moby Dick, and which is white. 1871 01:51:13,914 --> 01:51:15,914 "In the course of the book, 1872 01:51:15,949 --> 01:51:18,312 "the pirate Ahab encounters many hardships." (GRUNTS) 1873 01:51:18,347 --> 01:51:21,854 "His entire life is set around trying to kill a certain whale." 1874 01:51:21,889 --> 01:51:23,416 (PANTING) "I think this is sad 1875 01:51:23,451 --> 01:51:25,121 "because this whale doesn't have any emotions, 1876 01:51:25,156 --> 01:51:27,552 "and doesn't know how bad Ahab wants to kill him. 1877 01:51:27,587 --> 01:51:28,927 "He's just a poor 1878 01:51:29,457 --> 01:51:32,095 "big animal." 1879 01:51:32,130 --> 01:51:35,098 (CHARLIE GASPS FOR BREATH) 1880 01:51:35,133 --> 01:51:37,199 "And I feel bad for Ahab as well, 1881 01:51:37,234 --> 01:51:38,871 "because he thinks that his life will be better 1882 01:51:38,906 --> 01:51:40,433 "if he can just kill this whale, 1883 01:51:40,468 --> 01:51:42,303 "but in reality, it won't help him at all." 1884 01:51:43,339 --> 01:51:45,944 (CHARLIE BREATHING SHALLOWLY) 1885 01:51:45,979 --> 01:51:48,507 "I was very saddened by this book, 1886 01:51:48,542 --> 01:51:50,542 "and I felt many emotions for the characters. 1887 01:51:53,382 --> 01:51:54,887 "And I felt saddest of all 1888 01:51:54,922 --> 01:51:56,119 "when I read the boring chapters 1889 01:51:56,154 --> 01:51:58,187 "that were only descriptions of whales, 1890 01:51:58,222 --> 01:52:00,354 "because I knew that the author was just trying 1891 01:52:00,389 --> 01:52:02,224 "to save us from his own sad story, 1892 01:52:03,095 --> 01:52:04,193 "just for a little while." 1893 01:52:04,228 --> 01:52:05,590 (GASPING) 1894 01:52:05,625 --> 01:52:07,196 (WAVES LAPPING) 1895 01:52:07,231 --> 01:52:09,231 (EMOTIONAL MUSIC PLAYING) 1896 01:52:12,236 --> 01:52:14,137 "This book made me think about my own life, 1897 01:52:15,503 --> 01:52:18,009 "and then it made me feel glad for my..." 1898 01:52:18,044 --> 01:52:19,538 (BREATHING ERRATICALLY) 1899 01:52:21,476 --> 01:52:22,541 (LAUGHING) 1900 01:52:22,576 --> 01:52:23,608 (CHUCKLES) 1901 01:52:23,643 --> 01:52:25,313 (MUSIC SWELLS) 1902 01:52:25,348 --> 01:52:26,347 (GASPS) 1903 01:52:34,555 --> 01:52:36,159 (WAVES CRASHING) 1904 01:52:37,492 --> 01:52:40,031 (EMOTIONAL MUSIC CONTINUES) 1905 01:54:01,279 --> 01:54:03,279 (GRIM MUSIC PLAYING) 1906 01:54:12,455 --> 01:54:14,455 (WAVES CRASHING GENTLY)