1
00:00:02,420 --> 00:00:04,645
I am so ready for this.

2
00:00:12,330 --> 00:00:17,865
- Ah!
- Ah!

3
00:00:17,870 --> 00:00:19,395
What are you doing here?

4
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:22,335
Setting up for a romantic
evening with my boyfriend.

5
00:00:22,340 --> 00:00:24,835
I would've done it at my place,
but rich people

6
00:00:24,840 --> 00:00:27,710
have such nice lighting.
What are you doing here?

7
00:00:27,715 --> 00:00:29,620
I'm the rich person
with the nice lighting

8
00:00:29,625 --> 00:00:31,775
that owns this apartment.

9
00:00:31,780 --> 00:00:33,775
Wait. You and Beau, that's tonight?

10
00:00:33,780 --> 00:00:35,485
Don't look at this.

11
00:00:35,490 --> 00:00:38,955
What is that giant, gold monstrosity?

12
00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:42,625
It's a gift I made for you.

13
00:00:42,630 --> 00:00:46,355
Oh, I love it.

14
00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:50,425
Did I miss anything?

15
00:00:50,430 --> 00:00:52,395
Oh, you gave it to her without me?

16
00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:55,805
Yeah, and her reaction was priceless.

17
00:00:55,810 --> 00:00:58,635
Just a little something for you and Beau

18
00:00:58,640 --> 00:01:02,545
as you begin this beautiful
journey together as partners.

19
00:01:02,550 --> 00:01:07,315
We thought you could stand on
either side of it and be all...

20
00:01:07,320 --> 00:01:09,515
Thank you.

21
00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:13,315
Wow. I can't believe Beau
is going to propose

22
00:01:13,320 --> 00:01:15,555
that we do a channel together.

23
00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:18,025
After years of doing "iCarly" with Sam

24
00:01:18,030 --> 00:01:20,395
and then hosting Italian QVC

25
00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:22,465
and then my brief stint
in college radio,

26
00:01:22,470 --> 00:01:25,395
I'm finally going to be back
online where I belong,

27
00:01:25,400 --> 00:01:28,405
with a partner who I love and trust.

28
00:01:28,410 --> 00:01:30,035
Now, where should I put my phone,

29
00:01:30,040 --> 00:01:32,035
so I can secretly record him?

30
00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,005
Now that's true love.

31
00:01:34,010 --> 00:01:37,645
I told all the "iCarly" fans
to tune in to my livestream.

32
00:01:37,650 --> 00:01:41,185
Beau asking me to do a channel
together, that's good content.

33
00:01:41,190 --> 00:01:42,615
Why waste it?

34
00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:45,315
Couldn't agree more,
which is why after Spencer

35
00:01:45,320 --> 00:01:46,455
designed this sculpture,

36
00:01:46,460 --> 00:01:51,025
I outfitted it with a sneaky,
little spot for a camera.

37
00:01:51,030 --> 00:01:52,595
Mm...

38
00:01:52,600 --> 00:01:54,095
boop.

39
00:01:54,100 --> 00:01:56,795
Freddie, this is why we
stayed friends all these years,

40
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:58,935
you creepy genius.

41
00:01:58,940 --> 00:02:01,065
I actually did the whole making it part,

42
00:02:01,070 --> 00:02:04,965
so, you know, who's
the real creepy genius?

43
00:02:04,970 --> 00:02:06,575
This is so exciting.

44
00:02:06,580 --> 00:02:08,376
I've been wanting to start up
my own channel again,

45
00:02:08,380 --> 00:02:10,675
but I didn't want to do it by myself.

46
00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:12,516
You know what? He's probably
going to be here any minute,

47
00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:15,350
and I love you guys so much, but get.

48
00:02:19,860 --> 00:02:23,655
Hey, everyone. I'm back.
I know it's been a while,

49
00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:26,495
but you guys are in
for something really exciting.

50
00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:27,895
- Carly?
- Beau.

51
00:02:27,900 --> 00:02:29,525
Hey.

52
00:02:29,530 --> 00:02:31,835
Cool shape.

53
00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:35,505
Yeah, it's an and symbol
for Carly and Beau.

54
00:02:35,510 --> 00:02:36,510
Doesn't it make you

55
00:02:36,515 --> 00:02:39,010
just want to stand on
either side of it be all...

56
00:02:39,810 --> 00:02:41,905
Sure, kind of.

57
00:02:41,910 --> 00:02:44,980
But for now, let's sit and be all...

58
00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:50,345
Carly, we do a lot of things together.

59
00:02:50,350 --> 00:02:53,115
- I know. It's so great.
- We date.

60
00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:54,755
We share a Spotify account.

61
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:57,425
You came with me to the podiatrist.

62
00:02:57,430 --> 00:02:59,295
I just get you.

63
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:01,425
So I think it's only natural we...

64
00:03:01,430 --> 00:03:03,895
- Start a channel together.
- Need some time apart.

65
00:03:03,900 --> 00:03:09,205
Wait. What? Time apart? Why?

66
00:03:09,210 --> 00:03:10,865
We gotta get the phone.

67
00:03:10,870 --> 00:03:13,075
You came with me to the podiatrist.

68
00:03:13,080 --> 00:03:15,346
Well, yeah, but that's just
because your podiatrist is next

69
00:03:15,350 --> 00:03:17,075
to the good dumpling place.

70
00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:18,945
Could've done takeout.

71
00:03:18,950 --> 00:03:22,285
They're not as good at room temperature.

72
00:03:22,290 --> 00:03:25,020
Deep down, you know that.

73
00:03:27,390 --> 00:03:28,855
I love you.

74
00:03:28,860 --> 00:03:32,025
I just need a little space,
just for a minute.

75
00:03:32,030 --> 00:03:36,165
Oh, space, yeah. I'm fine with space.

76
00:03:36,170 --> 00:03:40,195
I love space. It's really nice
because it teaches you

77
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:43,965
to appreciate what you had
before you took all the space.

78
00:03:43,970 --> 00:03:47,735
So how long are we
talking here, like, a week?

79
00:03:47,740 --> 00:03:51,010
- Maybe a little longer.
- Two?

80
00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:56,245
You're just dumping me, aren't you?

81
00:03:56,250 --> 00:03:59,220
Yah! Yah!

82
00:04:01,490 --> 00:04:06,225
Now I have a broken heart
and a broken phone.

83
00:04:06,230 --> 00:04:10,500
Awesome. It's still working
and live-streaming everything.

84
00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:18,305
I think people will see
that it was a mutual thing.

85
00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:20,665
_

86
00:05:31,820 --> 00:05:33,215
Is it that time of day where

87
00:05:33,220 --> 00:05:35,015
you drag your depression down the hall

88
00:05:35,020 --> 00:05:38,115
from Spencer's apartment to ours?

89
00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:40,515
He's getting ready
for a sculpture premier party.

90
00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:41,785
I just want to stay here

91
00:05:41,790 --> 00:05:44,425
and re-watch every episode
of "Law & Order".

92
00:05:44,430 --> 00:05:47,425
The murders will cheer me up.

93
00:05:47,430 --> 00:05:50,295
We're going to that party.

94
00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:52,535
- Come on.
- Harper.

95
00:05:52,540 --> 00:05:54,065
You don't even like Spencer.

96
00:05:54,070 --> 00:05:55,070
Yes, I do.

97
00:05:55,075 --> 00:05:56,801
Why am I lying? The man is a ding-dong.

98
00:05:56,806 --> 00:06:01,211
But I do find the dumber
the man, the better the party.

99
00:06:01,216 --> 00:06:02,881
Of course you want to go.

100
00:06:03,250 --> 00:06:05,975
For you, parties are a
never-ending buffet of people

101
00:06:05,980 --> 00:06:07,475
who want to sleep with you.

102
00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:09,585
Cute guys, hot girls,

103
00:06:09,590 --> 00:06:11,785
ridiculously gorgeous,
non-binary lawyers

104
00:06:11,790 --> 00:06:13,785
who get your name tattooed
on their thigh.

105
00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:15,955
That only happened twice.

106
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:17,525
Me, on the other hand,

107
00:06:17,530 --> 00:06:20,155
I feel like my face is now
physically incapable

108
00:06:20,160 --> 00:06:21,795
of smiling.

109
00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:26,065
Carly, look...

110
00:06:28,610 --> 00:06:29,965
Beau's calling?

111
00:06:29,970 --> 00:06:31,375
I can't talk to him.

112
00:06:31,380 --> 00:06:33,075
I'm not dating. I'm not making videos.

113
00:06:33,080 --> 00:06:34,705
I'm too embarrassed about my life.

114
00:06:34,710 --> 00:06:38,105
You should be. Your legs look
like Eugene Levy's eyebrows.

115
00:06:38,110 --> 00:06:39,745
You said that was feminist.

116
00:06:39,750 --> 00:06:43,815
Carly, look, I know this is hard.

117
00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:45,385
When my family lost all their money,

118
00:06:45,390 --> 00:06:46,615
all I wanted to do was curl up

119
00:06:46,620 --> 00:06:48,215
on the deck of our 50-foot sailboat

120
00:06:48,220 --> 00:06:52,225
and cry, but I didn't. You know why?

121
00:06:52,230 --> 00:06:54,625
Because your dad sunk it for insurance.

122
00:06:54,630 --> 00:06:58,495
And because I decided to look
at it as an opportunity.

123
00:06:58,500 --> 00:06:59,995
I picked myself up.

124
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:02,635
I applied for every job
I could think of,

125
00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:05,105
and they all said I was unqualified.

126
00:07:05,110 --> 00:07:08,445
Then I got a minimum-wage job
as Skybucks,

127
00:07:08,450 --> 00:07:11,845
and I'm still there four years later.

128
00:07:11,850 --> 00:07:14,475
It had a happy-ending tone, but...

129
00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:16,345
Because it is happy.

130
00:07:16,350 --> 00:07:19,085
Accessorizing that
tacky-ass apron made me realize

131
00:07:19,090 --> 00:07:20,655
that I want to be a stylist,

132
00:07:20,660 --> 00:07:23,485
and now I have a job and a dream

133
00:07:23,490 --> 00:07:26,095
and all the half-and-half I can drink.

134
00:07:26,100 --> 00:07:30,265
- You're lactose intolerant.
- My body, my choice.

135
00:07:30,270 --> 00:07:34,065
Go to this party, take the first step,

136
00:07:34,070 --> 00:07:35,905
and if you don't take the first step

137
00:07:35,910 --> 00:07:39,875
in those black ankle boots,
can I borrow them?

138
00:07:44,280 --> 00:07:46,345
Wow. I thought I was early,

139
00:07:46,350 --> 00:07:48,445
but there are so many people
here already.

140
00:07:48,450 --> 00:07:51,215
They're servers.
I had them dress like guests,

141
00:07:51,220 --> 00:07:53,355
so my friends wouldn't be all,
"Ooh, look at Spencer

142
00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:55,555
with his waiters and
his remodeled apartment

143
00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:58,755
and his Swarovski crystal boxer briefs".

144
00:07:58,760 --> 00:07:59,925
Still just a regular guy.

145
00:07:59,930 --> 00:08:02,725
- Gold-leaf martini?
- Yes, please.

146
00:08:02,730 --> 00:08:03,995
You can really taste the gold.

147
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:08,035
- Mm, Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.

148
00:08:08,040 --> 00:08:10,105
You earned your success. You're the guy

149
00:08:10,110 --> 00:08:12,375
who made the marshmallow
White House sculpture.

150
00:08:12,380 --> 00:08:14,205
The way that it was
half melted to reflect

151
00:08:14,210 --> 00:08:18,945
our disintegrating democracy,
such a brave statement.

152
00:08:18,950 --> 00:08:21,345
It was an accident.

153
00:08:21,350 --> 00:08:23,045
I left it next to my cell phone,

154
00:08:23,050 --> 00:08:25,615
which broke out into a spontaneous fire.

155
00:08:25,620 --> 00:08:29,125
Anyway, now I own
a falcon named Jericho.

156
00:08:29,130 --> 00:08:32,795
Wow. I clearly did it all wrong.

157
00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:34,825
Pursued my dreams, married for love.

158
00:08:34,830 --> 00:08:36,725
Two divorces and a failed
start-up later,

159
00:08:36,730 --> 00:08:38,765
I'm back living with my mom.

160
00:08:38,770 --> 00:08:40,795
Maybe instead of figuring out
my next tech venture,

161
00:08:40,800 --> 00:08:43,305
I'll just melt some marshmallows.

162
00:08:43,310 --> 00:08:46,305
I'll sue you into the ground.

163
00:08:46,310 --> 00:08:48,505
- Wow. I clearly did it all wrong.
- Oh, no.

164
00:08:48,510 --> 00:08:50,475
Pursued my dreams, married for love...

165
00:08:50,480 --> 00:08:52,345
Millicent, do not post that.

166
00:08:52,350 --> 00:08:55,045
I'm making content.

167
00:08:55,050 --> 00:08:56,945
Told you just stop recording me.

168
00:08:56,950 --> 00:08:58,485
I'm back living with my mom.

169
00:08:58,490 --> 00:09:00,985
Just because you adopted me
doesn't make you my dad.

170
00:09:00,990 --> 00:09:02,455
I'm back living with my mom.

171
00:09:02,460 --> 00:09:07,525
Literally, it does. That is
exactly what it means.

172
00:09:07,530 --> 00:09:09,965
And send.

173
00:09:09,970 --> 00:09:13,065
Can you like it
to give it some traction?

174
00:09:13,070 --> 00:09:18,065
"Can you like it to give it
some traction, please?"

175
00:09:18,070 --> 00:09:20,705
I'm setting a timer
for exactly five minutes.

176
00:09:20,710 --> 00:09:23,905
After that, it's back to numbly
eating frozen french fries

177
00:09:23,910 --> 00:09:25,315
straight from the bag.

178
00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:27,945
Oh, good. You guys came.
So what did you bring the host?

179
00:09:27,950 --> 00:09:32,015
It's half-and-half. Where's the bar?

180
00:09:33,220 --> 00:09:36,555
Hi, Carly. How's retirement?

181
00:09:36,560 --> 00:09:37,885
I'm not retired.

182
00:09:37,890 --> 00:09:39,825
You haven't posted for a month.

183
00:09:39,830 --> 00:09:42,965
In internet years, that's a decade.

184
00:09:42,970 --> 00:09:46,535
It's okay, Carly. Go into the light.

185
00:09:46,540 --> 00:09:49,435
Your channel has two subscribers.

186
00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:51,205
I know. I'm one of them.

187
00:09:51,210 --> 00:09:55,375
Ugh. Now people are going to
think my channel is for olds.

188
00:09:55,380 --> 00:09:58,545
Okay, can I have
everyone's attention, please?

189
00:09:58,550 --> 00:10:01,345
Thank you. Okay.
While Carly is still here...

190
00:10:01,350 --> 00:10:03,915
One minute, 45 seconds to go.

191
00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,585
Years ago I created a sculpture

192
00:10:05,590 --> 00:10:07,255
with the most moving parts,

193
00:10:07,260 --> 00:10:10,755
unwittingly breaking
a Jonas World Record.

194
00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:15,895
I've since lost that title,
but tonight I shall reclaim it.

195
00:10:15,900 --> 00:10:19,695
Behold, the "Supertastic
Sculpture of Stuff..."

196
00:10:21,570 --> 00:10:22,665
"Plus".

197
00:10:25,680 --> 00:10:28,475
Impressive. Is it different
from the old one?

198
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:33,315
No. It is the old one,
just with more stuff.

199
00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:36,185
Hence the plus.

200
00:10:36,190 --> 00:10:39,885
- I'm not unamused.
- I'm full-on amused.

201
00:10:39,890 --> 00:10:42,685
Are we all looking at the same thing?

202
00:10:42,690 --> 00:10:44,925
That big, old pile of junk?

203
00:10:44,930 --> 00:10:46,425
It's art.

204
00:10:46,430 --> 00:10:49,525
Not everyone has to like it.
Why don't you like it?

205
00:10:49,530 --> 00:10:51,795
It's just the same thing you did before

206
00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:54,635
with a few new pieces, right?

207
00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:58,605
Will somebody put down
their gold drink and defend me?

208
00:10:58,610 --> 00:10:59,835
I will.

209
00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:02,645
The reason this is genius is...

210
00:11:02,650 --> 00:11:05,015
And I'm out. Night, guys.

211
00:11:05,020 --> 00:11:07,545
Freddie, finish her thought, please.

212
00:11:07,550 --> 00:11:11,015
Okay. Um.

213
00:11:11,020 --> 00:11:14,115
Carly? Carly Shay from Camp Lakehorn?

214
00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:19,095
Luke? Luke Tyler also
from Camp Lakehorn?

215
00:11:19,100 --> 00:11:20,995
- Are you leaving?
- No.

216
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:24,325
I'm just holding the door
for your girlfriend.

217
00:11:24,330 --> 00:11:26,395
I'm single.

218
00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,470
Oh, my God. We have so much in common.

219
00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,305
I can't believe we found
each other again.

220
00:11:37,310 --> 00:11:38,915
I just want to know
everything about you.

221
00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:40,545
What does your dad do?

222
00:11:40,550 --> 00:11:44,785
Well, he's in the Air Force
but was somehow on a submarine.

223
00:11:44,790 --> 00:11:50,055
And I'm not exactly sure.

224
00:11:50,060 --> 00:11:55,795
- Okay. What's your mom like?
- Uh... I...

225
00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:58,065
let's go back to my dad.

226
00:11:58,070 --> 00:12:01,635
So you hot-glued a bunch
of random stuff on there

227
00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:04,565
to keep a plaque,
then threw yourself a party?

228
00:12:04,570 --> 00:12:08,545
It's not a plaque. It's a certificate.

229
00:12:08,550 --> 00:12:12,345
I need to eat my feelings.

230
00:12:12,350 --> 00:12:16,445
Not a waiter?

231
00:12:16,450 --> 00:12:18,955
When I got back from Italy,
I went to college.

232
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:21,425
I tried theater and media studies,

233
00:12:21,430 --> 00:12:23,925
but I felt like I got more out
of doing "iCarly"

234
00:12:23,930 --> 00:12:27,055
then at any boring old lecture.
So what do you do?

235
00:12:27,060 --> 00:12:29,495
I'm a college professor.

236
00:12:29,500 --> 00:12:32,535
But I bet whatever you teach
is super meaningful.

237
00:12:32,540 --> 00:12:36,765
I specialize in the mouthfeel
of certain viscous foods.

238
00:12:36,770 --> 00:12:39,375
Yep, super meaningful.

239
00:12:39,380 --> 00:12:41,745
Trust me, I am in no place to date.

240
00:12:41,750 --> 00:12:45,675
See, just that self-awareness
tells me you totally are.

241
00:12:45,680 --> 00:12:49,320
They're out of spicy tuna
cones, so I'm going to dip.

242
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:54,685
That's my stepdaughter.
I share custody with my ex,

243
00:12:54,690 --> 00:12:57,760
who divorced me
and took all my nice shirts.

244
00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:02,995
Oh, there you are.

245
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:06,065
Millicent, I drew your bath,
and, Freddie... Freddie!

246
00:13:06,070 --> 00:13:09,165
I put your warm milk in
your Thermos next to your bed.

247
00:13:09,170 --> 00:13:11,136
And if you're both good,
I'll let you snuggle with me

248
00:13:11,140 --> 00:13:14,335
for ten minutes and
watch "Toledo House Flip".

249
00:13:14,340 --> 00:13:18,620
Oh, my gosh. Come on,
Freddie, "Toledo House Flip".

250
00:13:20,250 --> 00:13:24,745
So are we done here? Great. Thank you.

251
00:13:24,750 --> 00:13:28,255
Luke, I don't normally do
this on the first night,

252
00:13:28,260 --> 00:13:32,300
but should we go somewhere
a little more comfortable?

253
00:13:35,330 --> 00:13:38,535
I hope you still respect me after this.

254
00:13:38,540 --> 00:13:40,695
Okay. So in the criminal justice system,

255
00:13:40,700 --> 00:13:42,065
the people are represented

256
00:13:42,070 --> 00:13:45,335
by two separate yet equally
important groups, right?

257
00:13:45,340 --> 00:13:47,705
There's the police,
who investigate crime,

258
00:13:47,710 --> 00:13:52,015
and the district attorneys
who prosecute the offenders.

259
00:13:52,020 --> 00:13:53,775
These are their stories.

260
00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:01,685
Carly, is that you?

261
00:14:01,690 --> 00:14:04,155
You're normally catatonic until noon,

262
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:06,455
when you gather enough energy to cry.

263
00:14:06,460 --> 00:14:07,625
It's me.

264
00:14:07,630 --> 00:14:11,795
Help yourself to a mimosa.
Pancakes are on the way.

265
00:14:11,800 --> 00:14:14,535
You made breakfast,
you showered, you're happy.

266
00:14:14,540 --> 00:14:16,635
I'm thrilled. What's happening?

267
00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:20,105
Fate. Fate is happening.

268
00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:21,845
Did you know I was about to leave,

269
00:14:21,850 --> 00:14:23,305
I set a timer, it went off

270
00:14:23,310 --> 00:14:27,115
I opened the door
and there he was, Luke.

271
00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:28,785
No. Ugh.

272
00:14:28,790 --> 00:14:30,286
You were texting
in the group chat until,

273
00:14:30,290 --> 00:14:31,815
like, 3:00 a.m. last night.

274
00:14:31,820 --> 00:14:35,290
I swore I would never mute
my bestie, but you tested me.

275
00:14:38,030 --> 00:14:39,725
Why does it look so nice in here?

276
00:14:39,730 --> 00:14:43,295
I'm just so happy about
reconnecting with Luke.

277
00:14:43,300 --> 00:14:45,335
Did you know I was about to leave?

278
00:14:45,340 --> 00:14:47,865
I set a timer and when it went off,

279
00:14:47,870 --> 00:14:50,535
I opened the door and there he was,

280
00:14:50,540 --> 00:14:53,075
Luke.

281
00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:54,435
Millicent doesn't know the story.

282
00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:57,045
Don't care.

283
00:14:57,050 --> 00:14:59,215
Fine. I set a timer, then it went off.

284
00:14:59,220 --> 00:15:03,085
I opened the door
and there he was, Luke.

285
00:15:03,090 --> 00:15:04,445
Wait a minute.

286
00:15:04,450 --> 00:15:07,655
Why is there a framed picture
of Luke on that table?

287
00:15:07,660 --> 00:15:09,355
Oh, it's just from his Instagram.

288
00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:10,685
It's totally normal.

289
00:15:10,690 --> 00:15:12,955
Flowers, the pancakes.

290
00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:17,965
The showering. This is too nice for us.

291
00:15:17,970 --> 00:15:18,970
What?

292
00:15:18,975 --> 00:15:21,640
I can't do something nice for my friends

293
00:15:22,540 --> 00:15:24,235
and Beau to prove
that I won the break-up?

294
00:15:26,740 --> 00:15:28,905
What have you done?

295
00:15:28,910 --> 00:15:32,845
I figured since I'm so happy
and in such a good place,

296
00:15:32,850 --> 00:15:36,715
it's the perfect time
to reach out to Beau.

297
00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:41,885
Carly. Carly, Carly, Carly and friends.

298
00:15:41,890 --> 00:15:44,225
Friends, friends, friends.

299
00:15:44,230 --> 00:15:48,025
So excited for brunch, but first,

300
00:15:48,030 --> 00:15:50,525
Carly, can we talk a sec?

301
00:15:50,530 --> 00:15:51,696
- I'll get the water.
- You got that oatmeal?

302
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:53,570
I'm going to read the newspaper.

303
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:56,765
Thanks for having me over.
I'm glad we can catch up

304
00:15:56,770 --> 00:16:01,075
because I wanted you
to hear it from me first.

305
00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:03,545
I'm seeing someone.

306
00:16:03,550 --> 00:16:04,807
- We doing eggs?
- Current events.

307
00:16:04,811 --> 00:16:08,176
So creamy.

308
00:16:08,181 --> 00:16:09,815
Good for you, Beau.

309
00:16:09,820 --> 00:16:13,085
And we're doing a new channel together.

310
00:16:13,090 --> 00:16:15,485
What?

311
00:16:15,490 --> 00:16:20,495
Well, I'm dating someone too.
Luke. We have history.

312
00:16:20,500 --> 00:16:24,125
He's a professor, so our
connection is really cerebral

313
00:16:24,130 --> 00:16:26,995
but also physical and emotional.

314
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:29,005
All the connections
you can have with a person,

315
00:16:29,010 --> 00:16:31,535
we have, plus more.

316
00:16:31,540 --> 00:16:34,105
- This is his face.
- That's awesome.

317
00:16:34,110 --> 00:16:38,615
It is, and we're starting
a channel together too.

318
00:16:38,620 --> 00:16:40,475
- What?
- Wow.

319
00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:44,585
- This is goat milk!
- We don't even get the paper.

320
00:16:44,590 --> 00:16:47,615
You know, because comedy
and mouthfeel science

321
00:16:47,620 --> 00:16:49,755
are such a natural fit.

322
00:16:49,760 --> 00:16:52,925
Sure. Sure. When are going
to drop your first video?

323
00:16:52,930 --> 00:16:55,525
Uh, Friday.

324
00:16:55,530 --> 00:16:58,435
Wow. We're dropping Friday too.

325
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,435
And we're launching live.

326
00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:03,805
Premiere live? That's crazy risky.

327
00:17:03,810 --> 00:17:05,505
Look at you.

328
00:17:05,510 --> 00:17:06,905
I got to run to the bathroom,

329
00:17:06,910 --> 00:17:10,180
but then I want to hear
all about this channel.

330
00:17:16,220 --> 00:17:18,515
Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.

331
00:17:18,520 --> 00:17:20,385
Why did I just say
I'm launching a channel

332
00:17:20,390 --> 00:17:21,685
with a total stranger?

333
00:17:21,690 --> 00:17:22,885
Now wait a minute.

334
00:17:22,890 --> 00:17:26,955
Y'all went to camp.
You two made s'mores.

335
00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:29,565
Right. We have that.

336
00:17:29,570 --> 00:17:32,035
You know what?
This is going to totally work.

337
00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:33,635
Luke and I are going to kill it.

338
00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:34,810
- You will?
- Really?

339
00:17:34,815 --> 00:17:36,140
Luke?

340
00:17:36,145 --> 00:17:37,335
- You will.
- Really!

341
00:17:37,340 --> 00:17:38,880
Luke!

342
00:17:44,710 --> 00:17:46,045
I love this place.

343
00:17:46,050 --> 00:17:48,685
Just a heads up,
they only serve whey here.

344
00:17:48,690 --> 00:17:51,955
Like, whey protein that
you put in a smoothie?

345
00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:54,255
No, like the watery part of milk

346
00:17:54,260 --> 00:17:57,025
that remains after
the formation of curds.

347
00:17:57,030 --> 00:18:01,125
Divine mouthfeel.

348
00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:04,795
Do all these people know this?

349
00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:06,366
So I have something
really exciting to tell you...

350
00:18:06,370 --> 00:18:11,575
Mm, mm, mm! Classic Seattle tap.

351
00:18:11,580 --> 00:18:14,310
That slightly unctuous texture.

352
00:18:17,450 --> 00:18:20,345
- Very wet.
- Mm-hmm.

353
00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:21,516
And so I was going to tell you that...

354
00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:23,385
Here is our Bavarian goat whey,

355
00:18:23,390 --> 00:18:28,115
fermented at an altitude
of just under 10,000 feet.

356
00:18:28,120 --> 00:18:30,590
Enjoy.

357
00:18:31,460 --> 00:18:33,925
If you get a chunk,
that's considered good luck.

358
00:18:33,930 --> 00:18:35,800
Bottoms up.

359
00:18:43,010 --> 00:18:45,835
Guess I got lucky.

360
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:47,400
So the thing I was going to tell you...

361
00:18:54,020 --> 00:18:55,985
I'll wait.

362
00:18:59,390 --> 00:19:01,285
Yeah. We're done.

363
00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:05,625
- You wanted to see me?
- Yes.

364
00:19:05,630 --> 00:19:08,425
Okay. Which one of these things

365
00:19:08,430 --> 00:19:11,635
can I add to the sculpture
to make you like it?

366
00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:14,095
Spencer, that's not what this is...

367
00:19:14,100 --> 00:19:15,905
are those my sunglasses?

368
00:19:15,910 --> 00:19:19,275
- Maybe, or maybe they're art.
- Oh, come on.

369
00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:20,535
Who cares what I think?

370
00:19:20,540 --> 00:19:24,005
- Me! Me cares.
- But why does "me" care?

371
00:19:24,010 --> 00:19:25,615
Look, just because I'm young, cool

372
00:19:25,620 --> 00:19:28,116
and probably the hottest person
you'll ever meet in real life?

373
00:19:28,120 --> 00:19:31,145
- Yeah, all those.
- When you made the sculpture,

374
00:19:31,150 --> 00:19:33,855
you were inspired, and you loved it.

375
00:19:33,860 --> 00:19:36,385
That's all that matters.

376
00:19:36,390 --> 00:19:38,095
I'll buy you a car
if you say you like it.

377
00:19:38,100 --> 00:19:40,955
You are lucky I do not have parking.

378
00:19:44,070 --> 00:19:45,365
I needed this.

379
00:19:45,370 --> 00:19:47,265
I had discarded dairy juice for dinner.

380
00:19:47,270 --> 00:19:50,035
- No way.
- Yes, whey.

381
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:52,605
Why did I ever think I should
start a channel with Luke?

382
00:19:52,610 --> 00:19:54,435
Am I that desperate for a partner?

383
00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:56,905
Don't answer that, still talking.

384
00:19:58,180 --> 00:19:59,615
I just want to make things again.

385
00:19:59,620 --> 00:20:01,815
You don't need a partner to do that.

386
00:20:01,820 --> 00:20:04,985
Yeah. I don't need a partner.
I need Sam,

387
00:20:04,990 --> 00:20:07,885
but she's off following
her bliss with that biker gang.

388
00:20:07,890 --> 00:20:11,295
The Obliteraters. I hope she's okay.

389
00:20:11,300 --> 00:20:14,955
It's Sam. I hope they're okay.

390
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:18,025
I just wish she was here
so we could do "iCarly" again.

391
00:20:18,030 --> 00:20:19,700
Mm.

392
00:20:21,340 --> 00:20:23,535
Do you think I could do it on my own?

393
00:20:23,540 --> 00:20:26,305
Doesn't matter what I think.
It matters what you want.

394
00:20:26,310 --> 00:20:29,775
Of course, I wouldn't be
completely on my own.

395
00:20:29,780 --> 00:20:31,245
I'd have my new producer.

396
00:20:31,250 --> 00:20:35,615
- Aw. You do mean me, right?
- Yeah.

397
00:20:35,620 --> 00:20:37,015
Do you think you could shoot me

398
00:20:37,020 --> 00:20:40,785
using that filter that
makes my cheekbones all...

399
00:20:40,790 --> 00:20:42,725
That filter that makes you
look like an alien?

400
00:20:42,730 --> 00:20:45,425
A sexy alien.

401
00:20:45,430 --> 00:20:49,525
Sure. I guess there's
just one more question.

402
00:20:49,530 --> 00:20:52,500
If Spencer ever got around
to building that home gym.

403
00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:02,680
I was never going to use a home gym.

404
00:21:05,450 --> 00:21:09,085
- Ah!
- Oh, that's right.

405
00:21:09,090 --> 00:21:11,555
I forgot about
my marionette-making phase.

406
00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:15,325
I keep them up here because
it's away from the knives.

407
00:21:15,330 --> 00:21:17,825
Mm, why does that one look like Carly?

408
00:21:17,830 --> 00:21:19,526
I made one that looks
like you too, Freddie,

409
00:21:19,530 --> 00:21:24,195
but I sold it to Nora Dershlit.

410
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:25,865
Is this a good idea?

411
00:21:25,870 --> 00:21:27,795
I mean, what would I even do
on the show?

412
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:31,105
Old, goofy stuff, new,
sophisticated stuff?

413
00:21:31,110 --> 00:21:35,345
Just find something that
makes you smile. Go from there.

414
00:21:35,350 --> 00:21:37,905
Those dachshunds always made me smile.

415
00:21:37,910 --> 00:21:39,215
Who put those up there?

416
00:21:39,220 --> 00:21:41,250
I've never seen those before in my life.

417
00:21:45,220 --> 00:21:48,825
Aw. The idiot farm girl.

418
00:21:48,830 --> 00:21:52,755
You know what? This really
does look like a squirrel.

419
00:21:52,760 --> 00:21:57,065
Oh, my God. The sack. These were so fun.

420
00:21:57,070 --> 00:22:00,065
Yeah, until Sam superglued
my drawstring closed

421
00:22:00,070 --> 00:22:01,835
and left me here overnight.

422
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:03,565
Yeah. That was a rough night for me too.

423
00:22:03,570 --> 00:22:06,805
He would not stop screaming.

424
00:22:06,810 --> 00:22:10,305
George, the bra that told ghost stories.

425
00:22:10,310 --> 00:22:13,515
I never did grow into you.

426
00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:16,115
See, you came up with all
this stuff when you were a kid.

427
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:17,685
Imagine what you can do now.

428
00:22:17,690 --> 00:22:20,315
And we'll help however we can.

429
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:26,555
I'm really glad to hear
you say that because...

430
00:22:26,560 --> 00:22:29,725
I thought it might still be here.

431
00:22:29,730 --> 00:22:33,365
Damn it.

432
00:22:33,370 --> 00:22:34,995
We're back.

433
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:38,605
In five, four,

434
00:22:38,610 --> 00:22:41,305
three, two...

435
00:22:41,310 --> 00:22:44,705
Welcome to the new "iCarly".

436
00:22:44,710 --> 00:22:46,845
Ooh, looks like she's already
got a few viewers.

437
00:22:46,850 --> 00:22:49,815
Probably bots from Brazil.

438
00:22:49,820 --> 00:22:53,085
This is still "iCarly",
but it's grown-up now.

439
00:22:53,090 --> 00:22:55,625
So today I thought I'd share
my skin-care routine.

440
00:22:55,630 --> 00:22:58,425
According to the many,
many targeted ads I get,

441
00:22:58,430 --> 00:23:02,025
it's never too early to start using...

442
00:23:02,030 --> 00:23:04,925
anti-aging products!

443
00:23:04,930 --> 00:23:08,335
Even for Baby Spencer.

444
00:23:08,340 --> 00:23:11,675
Yeah! That's me!

445
00:23:11,680 --> 00:23:14,435
None of these products
were tested on animals,

446
00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:17,205
just one tiny, little lucky infant.

447
00:23:17,210 --> 00:23:21,315
Oh, I feel lucky!
In no way am I worried.

448
00:23:23,590 --> 00:23:26,685
- Here we go.
- Oh.

449
00:23:26,690 --> 00:23:28,455
Oh, I think he needs a lot more.

450
00:23:28,460 --> 00:23:31,725
- Some more?
- No. That's enough already.

451
00:23:33,430 --> 00:23:36,295
I don't think this is how you do it.

452
00:23:36,300 --> 00:23:37,865
I love this serum.

453
00:23:37,870 --> 00:23:40,095
I actually panic-bought it
when I was at a 7-Eleven,

454
00:23:40,100 --> 00:23:41,865
and the guy there called me ma'am.

455
00:23:41,870 --> 00:23:43,465
I don't know what he's so upset about.

456
00:23:43,470 --> 00:23:46,035
I pay people to do this to me.

457
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:48,175
They say that by the time
you need skin care,

458
00:23:48,180 --> 00:23:49,405
it's already too late,

459
00:23:49,410 --> 00:23:51,176
but you should still spend
all your money on it.

460
00:23:51,180 --> 00:23:53,775
And in the end, it's just
an expensive reminder

461
00:23:53,780 --> 00:23:55,985
we're all going to die someday.

462
00:23:55,990 --> 00:24:00,715
That's a little emo for
a comedy show, don't you think?

463
00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:02,285
- Sheet mask.
- What?

464
00:24:02,290 --> 00:24:05,895
- Yup. Here you go.
- Ah! No!

465
00:24:05,900 --> 00:24:07,725
People are weirdly loving this.

466
00:24:07,730 --> 00:24:09,925
I'm totally hating it!

467
00:24:09,930 --> 00:24:12,995
Enough of that, baby.
And now we're just going to...

468
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:14,000
That's cold.

469
00:24:14,005 --> 00:24:15,766
- Roll it all up.
- I don't like that feeling.

470
00:24:15,770 --> 00:24:17,605
- And we're going to absorb...
- Ow.

471
00:24:17,610 --> 00:24:20,275
- All the moisturizer.
- It's cold.

472
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:21,575
You ready for the lip mask?

473
00:24:21,580 --> 00:24:23,775
Oh, I don't know what it is, but I am.

474
00:24:23,780 --> 00:24:25,745
- Right here.
- Okay.

475
00:24:25,750 --> 00:24:29,145
Okay. You're going to want to
keep your mouth nice and shut.

476
00:24:29,150 --> 00:24:30,415
That sounds good.

477
00:24:30,420 --> 00:24:32,856
This lip mask is actually
made out of laundry detergent.

478
00:24:34,060 --> 00:24:36,585
Kinda of seems like we never left.

479
00:24:39,430 --> 00:24:41,925
A toast to my sister, Carly.

480
00:24:41,930 --> 00:24:43,995
- To Carly.
- To Carly.

481
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:47,835
Also I decided not to call
the Jonas people.

482
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:50,065
Let someone else have the world record.

483
00:24:50,070 --> 00:24:51,875
It's not why I made the sculpture,

484
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:54,675
and it's not why I love it.

485
00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:57,645
- Still not for me.
- Damn it.

486
00:24:57,650 --> 00:24:59,415
I think the sculpture is great.

487
00:24:59,420 --> 00:25:00,776
Do all the pieces still move?

488
00:25:00,780 --> 00:25:03,015
You tell me.

489
00:25:12,730 --> 00:25:17,565
I... I love it.

490
00:25:17,570 --> 00:25:20,065
- You do?
- Absolutely.

491
00:25:20,070 --> 00:25:22,705
It's about setting your own self on fire

492
00:25:22,710 --> 00:25:27,505
and then rebuilding
from the ashes like a phoenix.

493
00:25:27,510 --> 00:25:30,305
If you want to oversimplify it, sure.

494
00:25:30,310 --> 00:25:31,775
You know, you really had me going

495
00:25:31,780 --> 00:25:33,515
with the whole world record thing,

496
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:35,545
but I guess that was just a part of it.

497
00:25:35,550 --> 00:25:37,015
Performance art.

498
00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:47,195
It wasn't supposed
to catch on fire, was it?

499
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:49,170
Never is.

500
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:23,000
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -