1
00:00:04,352 --> 00:00:06,310
- Here inside a backyard tree,
2
00:00:06,354 --> 00:00:09,009
a squirrel embarks
on her journey into motherhood.
3
00:00:09,052 --> 00:00:11,663
This squirrel mother
will raise her young son
4
00:00:11,707 --> 00:00:14,318
without a male partner.
5
00:00:14,362 --> 00:00:17,582
She teaches him skills
of survival,
6
00:00:17,626 --> 00:00:19,062
then pushes him to accept
7
00:00:19,106 --> 00:00:21,195
a suitable mate
of her choosing...
8
00:00:23,893 --> 00:00:25,329
...and repeat the cycle.
9
00:00:33,468 --> 00:00:36,862
- But things don't always
go according to plan.
10
00:01:09,417 --> 00:01:10,896
Is that any good?
11
00:01:13,029 --> 00:01:14,204
- Saturday morning.
12
00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:15,205
Time to snoop through
13
00:01:15,249 --> 00:01:16,946
family's trash cans.
14
00:01:16,989 --> 00:01:19,949
Best way to really connect
with loved ones.
15
00:01:21,690 --> 00:01:23,779
Hm.
Annie still trying.
16
00:01:23,822 --> 00:01:24,997
Good girl.
17
00:01:25,041 --> 00:01:27,565
Okay, Trophy's.
18
00:01:27,609 --> 00:01:29,611
Trophy do better.
Huh.
19
00:01:29,654 --> 00:01:31,830
She eat a fruit.
20
00:01:31,874 --> 00:01:33,963
And last, Peter's.
21
00:01:34,006 --> 00:01:36,922
Boy too sensitive
to throw anything away.
22
00:01:36,966 --> 00:01:38,924
Wait.
23
00:01:38,968 --> 00:01:40,448
Toenail clippings.
24
00:01:40,491 --> 00:01:42,276
Is finally happened!
25
00:01:42,319 --> 00:01:45,148
My Peter is officially man!
26
00:01:47,063 --> 00:01:50,153
Yes, Dasha,
need woman with working uterus
27
00:01:50,197 --> 00:01:52,155
whose spirit is already broken.
28
00:01:52,199 --> 00:01:53,939
This afternoon perfect!
29
00:01:53,983 --> 00:01:55,637
Okay.
Bye-bye!
30
00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:59,597
Peter! I thought
the day would never come.
31
00:01:59,641 --> 00:02:01,121
Then, today I find out
32
00:02:01,164 --> 00:02:03,471
you finally ready for marriage!
33
00:02:03,514 --> 00:02:07,170
- Huh? But you always say
I'm not boyfriend material.
34
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:10,434
- In old country, at first sign
of a man's independence,
35
00:02:10,478 --> 00:02:11,827
he must marry.
36
00:02:11,870 --> 00:02:13,133
This either happens
37
00:02:13,176 --> 00:02:14,873
when he order his own meal
38
00:02:14,917 --> 00:02:16,136
in drive-through...
39
00:02:16,179 --> 00:02:17,659
- I like the way you say
40
00:02:17,702 --> 00:02:19,008
"plain hamburger."
41
00:02:19,051 --> 00:02:20,792
- ...sleeps alone in own bed
42
00:02:20,836 --> 00:02:22,446
during thunderstorm...
43
00:02:22,490 --> 00:02:24,709
- Well loud noises
make me snuggly.
44
00:02:24,753 --> 00:02:26,885
- ...or cuts his own toenails!
45
00:02:26,929 --> 00:02:27,973
- I did do that.
46
00:02:28,017 --> 00:02:29,323
My shoes were starting to hurt
47
00:02:29,366 --> 00:02:30,802
and I didn't want to bother you
48
00:02:30,846 --> 00:02:32,804
while you were gnawing
on your breakfast jerky.
49
00:02:32,848 --> 00:02:35,198
- Your bride, Svetlana,
arrive this afternoon.
50
00:02:35,242 --> 00:02:37,200
You marry immediately.
- But, Baba,
51
00:02:37,244 --> 00:02:40,725
I intend to meet the love
of my life rom-com-style.
52
00:02:40,769 --> 00:02:42,379
- Rom-com?
- We'll lock eyes
53
00:02:42,423 --> 00:02:44,468
across a crowded room.
- Eyes.
54
00:02:44,512 --> 00:02:47,036
- Or bump into each other
at the office
55
00:02:47,079 --> 00:02:48,864
- Office?
- and I'll drop all my papers.
56
00:02:48,907 --> 00:02:50,866
Or we'll accidentally
reach for something
57
00:02:50,909 --> 00:02:52,215
at the same time and --
58
00:02:52,259 --> 00:02:54,391
Whoops!
That's amore!
59
00:02:54,435 --> 00:02:56,176
- Oops, that's a-stupid.
60
00:02:56,219 --> 00:02:59,179
You have traditional
old country wedding.
61
00:02:59,222 --> 00:03:01,398
I go knit yak-hair vest
for ceremony.
62
00:03:03,748 --> 00:03:05,576
I'll just hide in here
for a few years,
63
00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:07,578
until Baba
can respect my wishes.
64
00:03:07,622 --> 00:03:09,580
- Get out!
- Oh!
65
00:03:09,624 --> 00:03:12,409
Aah! Uhhh!
- Shh! It's me!
66
00:03:12,453 --> 00:03:13,671
I was just messing with you.
67
00:03:13,715 --> 00:03:15,499
- Trophy,
go hide in your own closet.
68
00:03:15,543 --> 00:03:17,849
I'm gonna to need to be
in here for a while.
69
00:03:17,893 --> 00:03:20,330
- But your closet's the only one
with a toilet.
70
00:03:20,374 --> 00:03:22,506
- There's no toilet!
71
00:03:22,550 --> 00:03:23,768
- Oops.
- Get out of here
72
00:03:23,812 --> 00:03:25,248
and let me hide in peace.
73
00:03:25,292 --> 00:03:27,032
Otherwise, Baba will force me
74
00:03:27,076 --> 00:03:29,209
into an arranged marriage.
75
00:03:29,252 --> 00:03:31,689
- Sorry, Pete,
but, we all saw it coming.
76
00:03:31,733 --> 00:03:33,778
She's been grooming you
to be her spouse
77
00:03:33,822 --> 00:03:35,345
since childhood.
78
00:03:35,389 --> 00:03:37,695
- Wait, why are you hiding
in here?
79
00:03:37,739 --> 00:03:40,916
- No reason.
Just chilling.
80
00:03:40,959 --> 00:03:42,874
- Aah!
- There you are, Mom.
81
00:03:42,918 --> 00:03:45,225
The bird watching bus
is picking us up soon.
82
00:03:45,268 --> 00:03:47,749
Today we try to spot
the common pigeon.
83
00:03:47,792 --> 00:03:50,534
I promised.
You said you would go.
84
00:03:50,578 --> 00:03:52,101
- Annie, not all mommies are
85
00:03:52,144 --> 00:03:54,103
chaperone material.
86
00:03:54,146 --> 00:03:56,714
- Actually, due to budget cuts,
the school district stopped
87
00:03:56,758 --> 00:03:58,107
doing background checks, so,
88
00:03:58,150 --> 00:04:00,762
everyone's
chaperone material now.
89
00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:02,154
- Now, where do we hide?
90
00:04:02,198 --> 00:04:04,635
- You know what?
I have an easy-peasy idea
91
00:04:04,679 --> 00:04:07,769
that can help us both.
92
00:04:09,292 --> 00:04:10,772
We'll keep this simple.
93
00:04:10,815 --> 00:04:12,774
I'll just zap my spirit
into this
94
00:04:12,817 --> 00:04:14,776
unclaimed corpse --
95
00:04:14,819 --> 00:04:16,647
Susan, here --
and then pretend to be
96
00:04:16,691 --> 00:04:18,910
your fiancé that you've
kept secret from Baba.
97
00:04:20,521 --> 00:04:23,088
- And Susan's spirit will go
into your body?
98
00:04:23,132 --> 00:04:25,482
- Yeah, her dead spirit.
99
00:04:25,526 --> 00:04:27,267
You'll just strap
some rollerblades
100
00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:31,967
on my lifeless body
and send me on the bird trip.
101
00:04:32,010 --> 00:04:33,751
- Please have dimples,
please have dimples.
102
00:04:35,057 --> 00:04:37,581
- Ah.
So, once you're inside Susan,
103
00:04:37,625 --> 00:04:39,322
you and I will get married,
instead,
104
00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:41,411
and, since it's not your body,
105
00:04:41,455 --> 00:04:43,935
it won't be weird for us to...
106
00:04:43,979 --> 00:04:45,807
you know.
- No! No.
107
00:04:45,850 --> 00:04:47,025
It's temporary.
108
00:04:47,069 --> 00:04:48,331
But that should be plenty
of time
109
00:04:48,375 --> 00:04:51,116
for you to introduce "Susan"
to Baba
110
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:52,944
and get her
to call off the wedding.
111
00:04:52,988 --> 00:04:54,642
More importantly, I'll avoid
112
00:04:54,685 --> 00:04:57,122
that mother-daughter
pigeon thing!
113
00:04:57,166 --> 00:04:58,776
Okay?
Back up!
114
00:05:07,524 --> 00:05:09,352
- But things don't always go
115
00:05:09,396 --> 00:05:12,616
according to plan.
116
00:05:15,489 --> 00:05:16,620
- Oh, no!
117
00:05:19,362 --> 00:05:22,365
- Pretty sure Susan, here,
OD'd on heroin.
118
00:05:22,409 --> 00:05:24,541
But now I get
what all the fuss is about.
119
00:05:24,585 --> 00:05:26,369
- Where'd your soul land,
120
00:05:26,413 --> 00:05:27,631
Mr. Whiskers?
121
00:05:30,504 --> 00:05:32,549
- That thing is gonna
ruin my manicure!
122
00:05:32,593 --> 00:05:35,335
- There you are!
The bus is here!
123
00:05:35,378 --> 00:05:38,076
I made you that seed bark
you always refuse to try.
124
00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:40,644
Catch! Once you get past
the first twenty bites,
125
00:05:40,688 --> 00:05:42,472
you really start
to crave it, right?
126
00:05:42,516 --> 00:05:44,256
See ya, Pete!
Just a heads-up --
127
00:05:44,300 --> 00:05:45,693
that corpse isn't dead yet.
128
00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:46,998
Come on.
129
00:05:47,042 --> 00:05:50,045
- That squirrel's
gonna be a great mom.
130
00:05:50,088 --> 00:05:52,352
- I still can't believe
you're actually coming.
131
00:05:52,395 --> 00:05:54,832
You look excited, too,
but let's not have a repeat
132
00:05:54,876 --> 00:05:56,225
of my parent-teacher
conferences.
133
00:05:56,268 --> 00:05:58,183
No inciting violence, sex,
134
00:05:58,227 --> 00:05:59,837
or violent sex, okay?
135
00:05:59,881 --> 00:06:02,231
- Caw-caw, caw-caw!
136
00:06:02,274 --> 00:06:03,275
- Caw-caw!
137
00:06:03,319 --> 00:06:04,712
- And a caw-caw to you,
138
00:06:04,755 --> 00:06:06,409
my fellow enthusiasts.
139
00:06:06,453 --> 00:06:08,063
This is my mom, Trophy.
140
00:06:08,106 --> 00:06:09,934
See?
I told you she's real!
141
00:06:09,978 --> 00:06:13,111
- Glad you could finally come!
142
00:06:14,939 --> 00:06:17,681
- -She can migrate south on me
all winter long.
143
00:06:17,725 --> 00:06:18,856
Am I right, Ralphie?
144
00:06:21,163 --> 00:06:23,208
- You've been practicing
your bird calls.
145
00:06:23,252 --> 00:06:26,037
Pigeon fever is contagious!
146
00:06:27,561 --> 00:06:30,564
- I've never been
inside this shape before.
147
00:06:30,607 --> 00:06:33,393
- I think you look cute.
- Peter,
148
00:06:33,436 --> 00:06:36,047
I have wedding vest for you.
149
00:06:36,091 --> 00:06:37,614
Oh hoh hoh.
150
00:06:37,658 --> 00:06:39,703
Holds eye contact,
151
00:06:39,747 --> 00:06:42,532
doesn't cower at my scowl.
152
00:06:42,576 --> 00:06:45,274
I ordered
easily intimidated bride.
153
00:06:45,317 --> 00:06:46,623
This not Svetlana.
154
00:06:46,667 --> 00:06:49,452
Pete! Find return label.
I get crate.
155
00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:53,325
- Baba, I was afraid to tell you
before, but I'm already engaged,
156
00:06:53,369 --> 00:06:56,154
to this wonderful human woman,
Susan.
157
00:06:56,198 --> 00:06:57,547
We're very much in love,
158
00:06:57,591 --> 00:06:58,940
so I don't need
an arranged marriage.
159
00:06:58,983 --> 00:07:01,551
- You keep secret from Baba?
160
00:07:01,595 --> 00:07:02,813
Why?
161
00:07:02,857 --> 00:07:04,424
You tell me everything.
162
00:07:04,467 --> 00:07:06,730
- I do!
I can't argue with that!
163
00:07:06,774 --> 00:07:09,080
- We're so very much in love,
164
00:07:09,124 --> 00:07:12,432
but we were afraid you'd be
angry Pete chose his own wife.
165
00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:14,651
- I wasn't afraid of you, Baba.
166
00:07:14,695 --> 00:07:16,174
I was afraid of your reaction.
167
00:07:16,218 --> 00:07:17,349
- Shut face hole!
168
00:07:17,393 --> 00:07:19,090
Okay. Baba see
169
00:07:19,134 --> 00:07:21,179
if you good match for Peter.
170
00:07:21,223 --> 00:07:22,920
- Uh...
- First test.
171
00:07:22,964 --> 00:07:26,271
Why can't Peter speak,
if he looking at sweet cream?
172
00:07:26,315 --> 00:07:28,273
- Because Pete can't stop
drinking sweet cream
173
00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:30,580
until he hits 64 full ounces.
174
00:07:30,624 --> 00:07:31,755
- Drinking how?
175
00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:33,365
- In tiny sips,
176
00:07:33,409 --> 00:07:35,280
with his eyes clenched
shut!
177
00:07:35,324 --> 00:07:37,457
And his toes curled.
178
00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:39,633
- Lucky guess.
179
00:07:41,983 --> 00:07:44,464
- Okey-dokey,
Baba be straight with you.
180
00:07:44,507 --> 00:07:46,466
I think you corpse.
181
00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:48,946
The only part of me
that's dead is
182
00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:52,863
my ambition to lead
an independent, fulfilling life.
183
00:07:52,907 --> 00:07:54,386
No, thank you.
184
00:07:54,430 --> 00:07:58,129
- Hmm, you seem like the perfect
daughter-in-law.
185
00:07:58,173 --> 00:07:59,827
Maybe too perfect!
186
00:07:59,870 --> 00:08:02,699
- Not robot.
187
00:08:02,743 --> 00:08:05,310
Not marionette.
Very well.
188
00:08:05,354 --> 00:08:06,616
I accept this pairing.
189
00:08:06,660 --> 00:08:08,792
- Great.
So, Susan and I have
190
00:08:08,836 --> 00:08:11,186
some fiancée-ing
to go do in my room.
191
00:08:11,229 --> 00:08:14,319
- No. You must go
let Svetlana down in person.
192
00:08:14,363 --> 00:08:17,888
You meet her in half of an hour
at Fort Gator Wax Museum.
193
00:08:17,932 --> 00:08:20,151
- What?!
Don't make me confront Svetlana
194
00:08:20,195 --> 00:08:21,501
with a gallon of cream in me.
195
00:08:21,544 --> 00:08:23,067
I don't want any trauma
196
00:08:23,111 --> 00:08:24,982
attached to the cream!
- Bye-bye!
197
00:08:31,206 --> 00:08:34,426
- Gather 'round, George W. Bush
Memorial High birders.
198
00:08:34,470 --> 00:08:38,387
As you know, Annie Fantasy
organized this watch
199
00:08:38,430 --> 00:08:41,172
and she will now --
very briefly -- explain.
200
00:08:41,216 --> 00:08:42,826
- Did you know pigeons
mate for life? I do.
201
00:08:42,870 --> 00:08:45,046
Did you know pigeons come
in 28 different colored designs
202
00:08:45,089 --> 00:08:46,569
and often place their beak
inside their partner's beak
203
00:08:46,613 --> 00:08:47,875
to reinforce their pair bond?
204
00:08:47,918 --> 00:08:49,833
Separate genes control --
- Great Wikipedia
205
00:08:49,877 --> 00:08:51,182
energy, Annie.
206
00:08:51,226 --> 00:08:53,358
Here's a list
of plumage varieties
207
00:08:53,402 --> 00:08:55,056
and pigeon behaviors
to look for.
208
00:08:55,099 --> 00:08:59,103
Not sure how many we'll see,
but remember our mantra --
209
00:08:59,147 --> 00:09:02,367
"We choose to spend
our time this way."
210
00:09:02,411 --> 00:09:05,893
- I don't see a ring on those
slightly bluish fingers.
211
00:09:05,936 --> 00:09:08,548
Is there a lucky SOB at home
I should know about?
212
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:10,767
That stands
for spouse-of-birder.
213
00:09:14,597 --> 00:09:17,557
- Women love to be chased.
Watch this.
214
00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:19,297
- Dad, you promised
to stop saying that
215
00:09:19,341 --> 00:09:21,473
every time
you see a woman running.
216
00:09:21,517 --> 00:09:24,564
- I think
she just spotted an ash red.
217
00:09:24,607 --> 00:09:26,957
Wow! I've never seen her run
toward something.
218
00:09:27,001 --> 00:09:29,090
She's a real natural at this.
219
00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:30,308
Coming, Mom!
220
00:09:32,267 --> 00:09:34,095
- Let's find Svetlana
and let her down quick,
221
00:09:34,138 --> 00:09:35,575
so we can get to the room
222
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:38,882
of wax Patrick Swayzes!
223
00:09:38,926 --> 00:09:41,058
Aah!
- Easy, there.
224
00:09:41,102 --> 00:09:43,713
Gotta say,
this feels pretty natural.
225
00:09:43,757 --> 00:09:45,759
- Still your sister!
- Right.
226
00:09:45,802 --> 00:09:48,065
- My liver always swells
with pride,
227
00:09:48,109 --> 00:09:50,720
looking at Florida's
rich heritage.
228
00:09:52,461 --> 00:09:56,073
Don't look now,
but I think I see el brido.
229
00:09:56,117 --> 00:09:57,466
- Can you tell her, Troph?
230
00:09:57,509 --> 00:09:59,424
When I get nervous,
my throat closes up
231
00:09:59,468 --> 00:10:01,470
and the only sound
I can make is --
232
00:10:02,863 --> 00:10:05,082
- ASMR scissor snipping sounds.
I know.
233
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:07,084
Fine, I'll do it.
Just meet me
234
00:10:07,128 --> 00:10:10,435
at the Top Moments
in Breastaurant History Gallery.
235
00:10:10,479 --> 00:10:11,959
- Oh thank you, thank you!
236
00:10:12,002 --> 00:10:13,917
- Hi, Svetlana?
237
00:10:13,961 --> 00:10:17,007
So, I'm sorry to tell you this,
but the marriage is off.
238
00:10:17,051 --> 00:10:20,315
Mm-hmm. Well, you probably want
to be alone with your thoughts,
239
00:10:20,358 --> 00:10:23,100
so, safe travels,
Svet-blah-blah-blah.
240
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:28,671
- I love your pigeon passion,
but in birding,
241
00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:30,673
we don't get that close
to the action.
242
00:10:30,717 --> 00:10:32,196
It's different
from cock fighting.
243
00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:34,938
Mom! That tickles!
244
00:10:34,982 --> 00:10:36,679
Birding really brings out
your silly side.
245
00:10:36,723 --> 00:10:38,986
- What? Did you spot something?
246
00:10:39,029 --> 00:10:40,640
Whoa! Mom?
247
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:44,165
- Your mom is scaring the birds.
248
00:10:44,208 --> 00:10:46,123
That violates our cardinal rule!
249
00:10:46,167 --> 00:10:47,516
- Don't judge, Carmen.
250
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:50,127
My mom's the best birder
and parent here.
251
00:10:50,171 --> 00:10:51,781
Mom, don't!
252
00:10:52,913 --> 00:10:53,870
- Um, Annie.
253
00:10:53,914 --> 00:10:55,176
Um, is your mom
254
00:10:55,219 --> 00:10:57,308
number twoing in the thicket?
255
00:10:57,352 --> 00:11:00,485
- I should've pointed out
the restrooms back
256
00:11:00,529 --> 00:11:02,183
at the info center.
257
00:11:02,226 --> 00:11:04,489
- Must be all the birdseed
granola bars.
258
00:11:04,533 --> 00:11:06,361
They're really high in fiber.
259
00:11:06,404 --> 00:11:08,145
- Welp, that's my trigger.
You're sleeping
260
00:11:08,189 --> 00:11:09,712
on the pull-out couch
tonight, son.
261
00:11:09,756 --> 00:11:12,541
- Why did you get us bunk beds,
in the first place?
262
00:11:19,896 --> 00:11:21,376
- Ooh!
263
00:11:21,419 --> 00:11:22,507
Whoops!
264
00:11:25,119 --> 00:11:27,512
- Oh, excuse my pardons, please.
265
00:11:27,556 --> 00:11:28,818
I so nervous.
266
00:11:28,862 --> 00:11:30,428
I meet dream husband --
267
00:11:30,472 --> 00:11:32,735
his name Peter --
for first time today.
268
00:11:32,779 --> 00:11:35,999
- You have the deepest dimples
I've ever seen!
269
00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:38,698
- Sir!
You mustn't say this.
270
00:11:38,741 --> 00:11:40,830
I almost-married woman.
271
00:11:40,874 --> 00:11:41,918
- Svetlana?!
272
00:11:41,962 --> 00:11:43,833
I'm Peter!
273
00:11:43,877 --> 00:11:44,878
- Peter?
274
00:11:49,883 --> 00:11:53,103
- Mama, Mama.
snack bar?
275
00:11:53,147 --> 00:11:55,845
snack bar.
276
00:11:55,889 --> 00:11:58,369
- You have a son?
- Yes, his name is Peter Jr.
277
00:11:58,413 --> 00:12:01,372
I'm his biological father?!
278
00:12:01,416 --> 00:12:02,896
- How would that be possible?
279
00:12:02,939 --> 00:12:04,549
- I don't know.
Baba always says
280
00:12:04,593 --> 00:12:07,378
the way children appear
is none of my business.
281
00:12:07,422 --> 00:12:10,033
- Ah, his papa die of anxiety
during my childbirth.
282
00:12:10,077 --> 00:12:12,035
I never thought I marry again.
283
00:12:12,079 --> 00:12:14,081
But, when matchmaker called
and said
284
00:12:14,124 --> 00:12:17,780
wonderful man named Peter
needed an old-country wife,
285
00:12:17,824 --> 00:12:21,915
and my son being named Peter,
I thought for myself, maybe...
286
00:12:21,958 --> 00:12:24,395
- I'm like an adult version
of your son,
287
00:12:24,439 --> 00:12:28,573
which is every woman's
greatest desire in a husband.
288
00:12:28,617 --> 00:12:32,099
Is he drinking sweet cream?
289
00:12:32,142 --> 00:12:34,231
-Da.
This sound silly.
290
00:12:34,275 --> 00:12:38,279
It is favorite, but he like
to drink it really slow.
291
00:12:38,322 --> 00:12:41,891
For me, the sweeter the cream,
the stronger the meat.
292
00:12:50,857 --> 00:12:51,814
- Susan?
293
00:12:51,858 --> 00:12:53,076
Oh, my God!
294
00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:54,164
Susan?
295
00:12:58,168 --> 00:12:59,430
- Susan?
296
00:12:59,474 --> 00:13:01,389
- Patrick?
- You always said I resembled
297
00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:03,260
Patrick Swayze,
but I don't see it.
298
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:06,350
- Susan?
I mean, I'm Susan.
299
00:13:06,394 --> 00:13:07,525
Who else would I be in her body?
300
00:13:07,569 --> 00:13:10,311
So you and I -- Susan --
we are...
301
00:13:10,354 --> 00:13:12,139
we're friends?
Hmm? Mm-hmm.
302
00:13:12,182 --> 00:13:13,575
- Glad you're okay.
303
00:13:13,618 --> 00:13:15,185
Last time we partied,
I had to leave you
304
00:13:15,229 --> 00:13:16,839
at the front door of the ER.
305
00:13:16,883 --> 00:13:19,755
- Um, thanks, um,
but why are you desecrating
306
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,278
Mr. Point Break Swayze?
307
00:13:21,322 --> 00:13:22,714
- Don't you remember?
308
00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:25,369
I hide my illegal narcotics
all around town.
309
00:13:25,413 --> 00:13:26,718
Just like a squirrel.
310
00:13:26,762 --> 00:13:28,242
That's why they call me
Squirrel.
311
00:13:28,285 --> 00:13:30,766
Come on.
312
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:33,029
- Huh, did you know
this big guy's addiction
313
00:13:33,073 --> 00:13:35,379
to eating human flesh
didn't stop him from becoming
314
00:13:35,423 --> 00:13:37,991
the mayor of Fort Meyers?
315
00:13:38,034 --> 00:13:39,644
So much to learn.
316
00:13:39,688 --> 00:13:41,342
Susan is smart.
317
00:13:41,385 --> 00:13:42,909
- You're gonna love these, Susan.
318
00:13:42,952 --> 00:13:44,867
I know a place where we can
sample the goods
319
00:13:44,911 --> 00:13:47,696
and have wasted sex
to the "Roadhouse" soundtrack.
320
00:13:47,739 --> 00:13:50,003
Just like the old days, Susan.
Remember?
321
00:13:50,046 --> 00:13:51,961
Just like before I took you
to the ER.
322
00:13:52,005 --> 00:13:54,181
- I'm going to have
the time of my life.
323
00:13:54,224 --> 00:13:57,793
And I owe it all to Sue.
324
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:58,925
- Phew!
325
00:13:58,968 --> 00:14:00,709
Nice viewing perch.
326
00:14:00,752 --> 00:14:02,493
Did you lead me up here
so we could sneak
327
00:14:02,537 --> 00:14:05,018
in a little
mother-daughter bonding time?
328
00:14:05,061 --> 00:14:06,410
- There are so many things
329
00:14:06,454 --> 00:14:08,717
I've been
wanting to talk with you about.
330
00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:10,240
I had this dream
a couple days ago
331
00:14:10,284 --> 00:14:12,242
where I wore shorts to school
332
00:14:12,286 --> 00:14:14,549
and things seemed
to go pretty well?
333
00:14:14,592 --> 00:14:17,073
Do you think my calves
could handle that in real life?
334
00:14:17,117 --> 00:14:20,120
Because I think clamdiggers
are the best I can do right now.
335
00:14:20,163 --> 00:14:21,425
- What a magical day.
336
00:14:21,469 --> 00:14:24,211
I feel like
we're finally connecting.
337
00:14:24,254 --> 00:14:25,908
I love you, Mom.
338
00:14:28,171 --> 00:14:29,738
- Wait a minute.
339
00:14:29,781 --> 00:14:31,000
Food deposits in cheeks.
340
00:14:31,044 --> 00:14:32,393
Climbing ability.
341
00:14:32,436 --> 00:14:34,743
Number two'ing outside
in the daytime.
342
00:14:34,786 --> 00:14:36,484
You switched souls
343
00:14:36,527 --> 00:14:38,790
with a squirrel
to avoid my field trip!
344
00:14:38,834 --> 00:14:39,922
Didn't you?
345
00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,968
But you did send your body.
346
00:14:42,011 --> 00:14:45,623
I guess that means you really
do care about me.
347
00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:47,887
You just misinterpret
my radical acceptance
348
00:14:47,930 --> 00:14:49,801
as stupidity, don't you?
349
00:14:49,845 --> 00:14:52,021
Don't you? Aww.
350
00:14:52,065 --> 00:14:53,936
Well, at least you didn't
make me go to
351
00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:56,460
another school thing alone.
That's something.
352
00:14:56,504 --> 00:14:58,245
- How about a ride
back down the tree?
353
00:15:02,466 --> 00:15:04,512
- Dasha, arranged marriage off.
354
00:15:04,555 --> 00:15:08,037
Peter already have secret
fiancée who might be his sister.
355
00:15:08,081 --> 00:15:10,300
I know.
This Old country way,
356
00:15:10,344 --> 00:15:13,825
but I always thought Petey fall
in love "The Fast & The Furious"
357
00:15:13,869 --> 00:15:17,960
style, where sexual tension
meet illegal street racing,
358
00:15:18,004 --> 00:15:22,182
resulting in makeshift family
of gorgeous misfits.
359
00:15:22,225 --> 00:15:24,358
Ah, oh, well. Bye-bye.
360
00:15:26,142 --> 00:15:29,624
So, you telling me these kids
get break from college,
361
00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:32,801
drink malt lemonade,
walk into ocean and die,
362
00:15:32,844 --> 00:15:35,673
and then you make the money
from their funerals?
363
00:15:35,717 --> 00:15:38,198
This is the American dream.
364
00:15:38,241 --> 00:15:41,288
- I know. It sounds like
a fairytale, but it's true.
365
00:15:41,331 --> 00:15:42,942
- Tell us more, Dada.
366
00:15:42,985 --> 00:15:45,640
- I having too much fun, Peter.
367
00:15:45,683 --> 00:15:48,643
I so glad you too milky
to find own wife.
368
00:15:48,686 --> 00:15:50,471
- Svetlana, I need
to tell you something --
369
00:15:52,081 --> 00:15:53,996
It's my mother.
I should take this.
370
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:57,347
You might as well get used
to her coming between us.
371
00:15:57,391 --> 00:15:58,958
- Of course, my Peter.
372
00:15:59,001 --> 00:16:00,742
- Baba, I'm glad you called.
373
00:16:00,785 --> 00:16:03,049
About Svetlana,
I think I love her.
374
00:16:03,092 --> 00:16:04,528
- Baba fix.
375
00:16:04,572 --> 00:16:05,877
Bring Susan home now.
376
00:16:05,921 --> 00:16:07,401
Wedding need to start ASAP
377
00:16:07,444 --> 00:16:09,229
because Baba go to bed
in 30 minute.
378
00:16:09,272 --> 00:16:11,535
- What?
No, Baba, you don't under--
379
00:16:11,579 --> 00:16:14,974
- Baba find Svetlana new fiancé
approved by village.
380
00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:16,236
Amazing man.
381
00:16:16,279 --> 00:16:18,107
Lives four blocks from beach.
382
00:16:18,151 --> 00:16:19,674
More hair on arms.
383
00:16:19,717 --> 00:16:21,806
Matchmaker calling Svetlana now.
384
00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:24,026
- Baba, wait!
I love Svetlana, not Susan.
385
00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:25,332
Oh, no!
386
00:16:25,375 --> 00:16:26,768
- How much hair on arms?
- Svetlana!
387
00:16:26,811 --> 00:16:28,552
- And what about fingers?
388
00:16:28,596 --> 00:16:30,380
- Oh! That's a lot better!
389
00:16:30,424 --> 00:16:31,686
- Svetlana!
- Thank you.
390
00:16:31,729 --> 00:16:34,645
- Peter, my great day
now even better.
391
00:16:34,689 --> 00:16:37,474
Since you lie to me and not say
you already engaged
392
00:16:37,518 --> 00:16:40,651
to local woman,
I get to marry man named Choad.
393
00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:43,089
- Susan isn't really my fiancée.
394
00:16:43,132 --> 00:16:47,267
I only told Baba she was because
I wanted to find love on my own.
395
00:16:47,310 --> 00:16:48,311
Then I did.
396
00:16:48,355 --> 00:16:50,313
With you and Pete Jr.
397
00:16:50,357 --> 00:16:52,272
Let's forget about
Susan and Choad.
398
00:16:52,315 --> 00:16:53,708
Call the matchmaker back.
399
00:16:53,751 --> 00:16:55,318
Tell her
you're going to marry me.
400
00:16:55,362 --> 00:16:58,234
- Peter, oh,
sweet foolish Peter.
401
00:16:58,278 --> 00:17:01,672
Don't you know that love always
begins by deceiving one's self,
402
00:17:01,716 --> 00:17:04,023
and always ends
by deceiving others.
403
00:17:04,066 --> 00:17:06,460
That is what the world
calls romance.
404
00:17:06,503 --> 00:17:07,939
Plus, Choad has hairier arms.
405
00:17:07,983 --> 00:17:09,550
You understand.
- No!
406
00:17:09,593 --> 00:17:11,030
No!
407
00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:12,335
If I had to do it over,
408
00:17:12,379 --> 00:17:13,728
I would have never
gotten engaged
409
00:17:13,771 --> 00:17:15,556
to my resurrected
sister's spirit
410
00:17:15,599 --> 00:17:19,429
inside another woman's
decaying corpse.
411
00:17:19,473 --> 00:17:21,518
- Like turducken. Yes, I see.
412
00:17:21,562 --> 00:17:23,390
I wish you every happiness,
Peter.
413
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:25,957
Go to corpse-sister Susan,
work things out.
414
00:17:26,001 --> 00:17:28,221
Maybe we meet again one day.
415
00:17:31,702 --> 00:17:33,835
- We're almost at the end
of the trail, everyone.
416
00:17:33,878 --> 00:17:35,924
Now, I know
what you're thinking.
417
00:17:35,967 --> 00:17:38,100
If you'd joined
loom club instead,
418
00:17:38,144 --> 00:17:41,712
you would've gotten to make
a potholder this afternoon.
419
00:17:41,756 --> 00:17:44,367
But remember our other motto.
420
00:17:44,411 --> 00:17:47,370
- No club prepares you
for life's disappointments
421
00:17:47,414 --> 00:17:49,155
like birding club.
422
00:17:49,198 --> 00:17:51,592
-Shh! I hear a bird.
423
00:17:51,635 --> 00:17:52,897
A living one.
424
00:17:52,941 --> 00:17:54,290
Try to spot it, everybody.
425
00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:57,337
- Oh, my gosh,
it's a white-crested pied.
426
00:17:57,380 --> 00:18:00,601
It's got a nest full of eggs!
427
00:18:01,950 --> 00:18:03,343
- Ms. Fantasy, halt!
428
00:18:03,386 --> 00:18:04,909
By the order of
the bird watchers!
429
00:18:04,953 --> 00:18:06,433
- That's not a real thing,
Ralphie.
430
00:18:06,476 --> 00:18:08,870
- Your mother is going
right up to the nest.
431
00:18:08,913 --> 00:18:10,480
Why is she getting so close?
432
00:18:10,524 --> 00:18:12,265
- Maybe we could bribe her
back down.
433
00:18:12,308 --> 00:18:14,049
Does anyone see any acorns?
434
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,790
- Don't feed her more!
435
00:18:15,833 --> 00:18:17,531
We don't need to
watch her poop again.
436
00:18:17,574 --> 00:18:19,750
- Speak for yourself, Carmen.
437
00:18:34,591 --> 00:18:36,811
- Annie, I can't believe this.
438
00:18:36,854 --> 00:18:40,510
Your mother appears
to be communicating with a bird!
439
00:18:40,554 --> 00:18:41,772
- That's my mom.
440
00:18:41,816 --> 00:18:43,383
- Why don't you ever talk
to birds?
441
00:18:43,426 --> 00:18:45,428
- Baby, I can barely talk
to your father.
442
00:18:45,472 --> 00:18:47,952
- She's bringing down the pigeon
and the nest!
443
00:18:49,302 --> 00:18:50,477
- Oh, wow.
- Amazing.
444
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:52,000
- Your mother really knows
445
00:18:52,043 --> 00:18:54,742
how to spice up ornithology,
Annie.
446
00:18:54,785 --> 00:18:56,918
- I think the eggs
are about to hatch.
447
00:18:56,961 --> 00:19:00,095
Birders, get your cameras out.
448
00:19:01,836 --> 00:19:03,838
- Oh, the miracle of --
449
00:19:03,881 --> 00:19:06,841
Oh!
450
00:19:06,884 --> 00:19:08,625
- No one ever comes in here.
451
00:19:08,669 --> 00:19:11,106
- So how hard
do we like to party?
452
00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:13,587
Because it's been too long
for old Susan.
453
00:19:13,630 --> 00:19:15,589
Foreplay.
454
00:19:15,632 --> 00:19:17,199
- Oh, Susan, these will make you
455
00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:19,767
hallucinate eight heads
on everyone.
456
00:19:19,810 --> 00:19:23,553
So it'll feel like an orgy
with just the two of us.
457
00:19:23,597 --> 00:19:25,251
- Oh, wait. Damn it.
458
00:19:25,294 --> 00:19:28,254
I have one more stash in
the "Garfield & Friends" wing.
459
00:19:28,297 --> 00:19:29,429
Don't move.
460
00:19:29,472 --> 00:19:31,213
I'll be right back.
461
00:19:31,257 --> 00:19:34,608
- I'm about to get high and boink
might-as-well-be Patrick Swayze.
462
00:19:34,651 --> 00:19:37,480
And to think I could be
on a birdwatching trip!
463
00:19:38,873 --> 00:19:40,266
- No! No, no.
464
00:19:40,309 --> 00:19:41,789
Time can't be up yet.
465
00:19:41,832 --> 00:19:43,704
No, no, no!
466
00:19:51,538 --> 00:19:52,974
- Not again.
467
00:19:53,017 --> 00:19:55,194
- Hey, Andre, I found
that misplaced hitchhiker
468
00:19:55,237 --> 00:19:57,370
from the Hall of
Dangerous Situations for Women.
469
00:19:57,413 --> 00:20:00,242
I'mma take her back.
470
00:20:00,286 --> 00:20:03,941
- I'd better not still be on that
fucking birdwatching trip!
471
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:12,385
- You discovered an entirely
new species, Mom.
472
00:20:12,428 --> 00:20:13,908
Even if you really
are a squirrel,
473
00:20:13,951 --> 00:20:16,171
this is the best day
we've ever had.
474
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:17,738
Thank you.
475
00:20:20,828 --> 00:20:23,091
- Shit.
476
00:20:23,134 --> 00:20:24,658
Ugh!
477
00:20:24,701 --> 00:20:26,137
Did I eat carbs today?
478
00:20:26,181 --> 00:20:28,618
- You were a great Mom today.
479
00:20:28,662 --> 00:20:31,055
- I was? Oh, fabulous.
480
00:20:31,099 --> 00:20:32,361
Maybe for your choir recital
481
00:20:32,405 --> 00:20:34,668
I can swap bodies
with the morgue goat.
482
00:20:34,711 --> 00:20:36,800
- He does love Philip Glass.
483
00:20:36,844 --> 00:20:39,760
- That was just amazing,
Mrs. Fantasy.
484
00:20:39,803 --> 00:20:41,283
Birder of the year!
485
00:20:41,327 --> 00:20:43,329
Birder of the year!
486
00:20:43,372 --> 00:20:46,288
Chant with me, I'm feeling
very self-conscious right now.
487
00:20:46,332 --> 00:20:47,811
- Birder of the Year!
488
00:20:47,855 --> 00:20:49,770
Birder of the Year!
Birder of the Year!
489
00:20:49,813 --> 00:20:52,033
- That's me.
490
00:20:52,076 --> 00:20:53,861
- Trophy! There you are.
491
00:20:53,904 --> 00:20:56,646
I think we should just get
married to appease Baba.
492
00:20:56,690 --> 00:21:00,128
That's what my therapist calls
"exactly the problem."
493
00:21:05,264 --> 00:21:08,789
Okay, so maybe no s-e-x, but...
494
00:21:10,399 --> 00:21:13,707
Whoa!
495
00:21:13,750 --> 00:21:15,274
So...
496
00:21:15,317 --> 00:21:17,493
what's your son's name?
497
00:21:52,963 --> 00:21:54,791
- Cream, Mama?
498
00:21:54,835 --> 00:21:57,751
- Hey, I told you,
no more of that stuff.
499
00:21:57,794 --> 00:22:00,928
Only freaks drink sweet cream!
500
00:22:00,971 --> 00:22:03,931
- Choad, please!
- You better start acting right
501
00:22:03,974 --> 00:22:07,587
if you want to earn
the name of Choad Jr.
502
00:22:07,630 --> 00:22:09,980
- Maybe I should
have married Peter.
503
00:22:10,024 --> 00:22:13,506
Oh, if only his arms
had more hairs.