[waves crashing]
[Older Máximo] Okay. You ready for a snack?
This snack is pretty special.
Okay. Uh, Mom just texted to see how it's going,
so let me just answer her and I'll be right there.
Okay, okay. Hey, hey.
Impress her. Reply back in Spanish.
[in Spanish] None of your business, don't be so nosy.
-Are you sure? -[in English] Yeah.
What does that mean?
It's a colloquial way that we use in Mexico
to say, "Everything's okay."
-[sighs] -Ay. Do it.
[in Spanish] None of your business, don't be so nosy.
[in English] Did you text her, or-- Hey! Hey, what are you doing?
That-- That-- That's private.
-[closes box] -That was a brand new letter.
Uh, what was it about? And who's Mariano?
You shouldn't be snooping, okay?
[stutters] Mariano is very important.
I'll tell you about him later.
Did he work at the hotel? Was he a guest? What does he want you to do?
-Something I don't know if I can ever do. -What's that?
Attend your nephew's school play?
-Sorry, I need to let that go. -[sighs]
I'm afraid I can't explain it yet.
If I told you right now, you wouldn't understand. Okay?
Especially if I told you in Spanish.
-Shrimp cocktail? -Yeah.
I have a shrimp cocktail every time I'm here.
Why is this one special?
Because this one's from 1984.
[chuckles] Just kidding.
You see, shrimp cocktail always reminds me of my first wife.
-What? -Mm-hmm.
You had a wife?
Becca.
She changed my life,
and just in time too.
I was really feeling sad about Julia.
Just picturing her and Chad on a romantic weekend together
made me sick to my stomach.
[sighs]
[in Spanish] I can't believe I told Chad
exactly what he needed to do to make up with Julia.
Now he looks like a hero and I look ridiculous.
Speaking of…
What's going on with that outfit?
[in Spanish] Today's the most important game of the season.
Hugo Sánchez is wearing number four,
so everything is about the number four today!
I woke up at four a.m.
I showered in exactly four minutes,
and I paid four dollars for this radio.
It was actually only three-fifty, but I didn't want to jinx it.
You're gonna get in trouble!
With who?
No one even knows my name at work.
Come on, you're exaggerating.
-[in English] Morning, Guillermo. -Morning, Máximo.
-[in English] Morning, Guillermo. -Good morning…
You.
We have the same name, Memo.
As for Julia, you should follow the great Hugo Sánchez.
He went where he was wanted.
What does that mean?
They didn't appreciate him in Mexico,
so he went to Spain where they do appreciate him.
And now he's the king of football.
You should do the same.
You think I should move to Spain?
[sighs] Julia chose Chad.
You can spend time being sad about it,
or you can join your best pal for the big game.
Go where you're wanted.
High four!
[Billy Joel's "Uptown Girl" playing]
[singing in Spanish]
Uh, inside, outside, wherever you want.
I'll check in on you in a few minutes.
Máximo, I'm so glad you're here.
There are two very, very, very, very wealthy guests
on the other side of the pool.
They're both big spenders and huge tippers.
So, this is what I was thinking we can do…
I keep serving both of them,
and you go find a corner and cry lots of…
[in Spanish] "little boy tears"
[in English] wishing you were as awesome as me.
Ready? Go.
Hey. What was that about?
[singing continues]
Just my coworker being a pendejo.
[giggles]
I'm trying to earn money for my mom's surgery,
and he messes with me every chance he gets.
Ah, surgery. I know that line.
-Line? -Yeah.
Like, to get bigger tips. When waitresses pretend to be pregnant.
People do that? Faking pregnancy?
Oh, yeah. My college roommate used to put a pillow under her shirt.
Her tips doubled. You should try it.
[chuckles]
[woman] Oh, look. There you are, Becca.
-Ah. -Hi, guys.
-These are my parents, Marcia and Barry. -[Barry] We couldn't find you.
I was worried it'd be like that time that you got mad at us and fled the city.
I did not flee the city. I went below 23rd Street.
-Hey, we live on the Upper East Side-- -But don't worry, we voted for Mondale.
-Really? With the voting record? -Have you ever been to New York?
I understood "live" and "don't."
[Barry chuckles] Wow.
That's the first time we've seen her smile all trip.
-[Marcia] Oh, come on. -[Barry] Yep.
You skipped out on all the morning activities,
you are not missing brunch.
Uh, care to join us, Mister...
-Máximo. -[Barry] Máximo.
But I don't know if I can.
-Okay. Where's your boss? -Barry--
[Barry] Hey, Don Pablo!
Máximo okay to join us for brunch?
The guest gets what the guest wants.
[Barry] Gracias. You're in.
[Older Máximo] At that moment, I thought of Memo's wise words,
"Go where you're wanted."
Wow, thanks.
I can't sit at the table dressed like this, though.
Oh. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Here, allow me.
-[Barry] Try this. Here we go. -Oh, yeah.
[both] Ah!
-[Barry] Perfecto. -Yes. Okay.
-[Marcia] Gorgeous. [speaks Spanish] -You look like Elvis.
[in Spanish] I'll be back. I've got to go call Father Ramón.
Mm-hmm.
[static on radio]
[in Spanish] Come on.
Ay.
Come on!
[mutters]
Ay!
How's the club sandwich, Mr. Slobotkin?
-That guy's bluffing, go all in. -Hmm.
-Welcome, familia. -Ah.
Now, who is ready for some mango ma--
Hello, Héctor.
I know it's very, very, very, very, very, very early in the day,
but is the kitchen serving
[in Spanish] "little boy tears"
Oh, that sounds delicioso.
I'd love a round for the table.
The-- The table?
Of course.
[in Spanish] I could get used to this.
Now, today, people treat me well
and tell me what I wanna hear because I pay them to.
But back then, being treated like--
like I had wealth and privilege was new to me.
So I keep telling Becca, "If you're feeling down, why suffer?
-Just take a benzo." -Ugh.
Máximo, what is your opinion on benzos?
[in English] What kind of car is that? I don't know much about German brands.
-[snorts, laughs] -He's funny.
Oh. Becca, if you're going to change for the catamaran, you better hurry.
[Barry] Come on, sweetheart.
-You wanna make some money, right? -Mm-hmm.
And I want them to stop smothering me, so follow my lead.
Hey, Mom?
Máximo was just telling me about the Acapulco springs
and how they're very restorative.
-Right? -Ah.
-The-- -Yep.
Oh, yes. They're healing springs built by the Mayans.
-The Mayans? -Oh.
Wow, that sounds like it would be helpful for you there, Becca.
-That's what I was thinking. -Hey, Señor P?
Can, uh, Becca borrow Máximo for the day? Gracias.
And, you know, you'll need some spending money.
-Would 150 do? -[Becca] Thank you.
And I put a little extra in there for you.
And, sweetheart, why don't you take the rental car?
I got the extra insurance, don't worry.
-Thank you. -Be careful.
Have fun. Love you.
That was fun. And profitable.
Your parents don't seem so bad.
Why did you wanna ditch them?
Ah, they're okay. It's just, my boyfriend just broke up with me,
and all they want me to do is verbalize my emotions.
I can relate.
Oh? Your mom wants you to talk about your emotions all the time too?
What? [chuckles] No. My mom is Mexican.
I cried when my parakeet died, and she handed me a shovel.
[chuckles] Okay. So then, how can you relate?
There's this girl.
I really like her,
but she went away for the weekend with her boyfriend.
Mmm.
Around here, you don't do that unless your next trip is to the altar.
Anyway, nice doing business with you.
You know, I am in Acapulco.
And you just got the afternoon free. And we have money.
And we both have certain people that we do not want to be thinking about,
so…
do you want to show me around?
That could be fun.
Okay. Give me a couple minutes, I'll go get changed.
I should change as well.
I don't want someone on the streets to stop me and order a drink.
[both chuckle]
Have a good time, Máximo.
But don't forget
you are the staff, they are the guests.
Shit.
This can't be.
Yes, room 310, it's unusable.
Please do not book any guests in there for a few days. Over.
[in Spanish] Broken shower.
Major plumbing problem.
But the TV still works?
Yeah, gets all FOUR channels.
[sighs]
[in English] It's a sign! [chuckles]
[gasps]
-Hey, Héctor. -Hey, Mario.
-It's Memo. -If you say so.
Okay. Have you seen Máximo?
He's busy with a guest.
Well, when you see him, can you tell him I'm watching the big match in room 310?
You're watching the big match in room 310?
-Huh? No. -Huh? No?
No. No. I'm still working on my English.
I meant the big mattress.
Yeah, the giant mattress in room 310, I need to inspect it for bugs.
Yes, of course. I'll be sure to give him the message.
-[sighs] Thank you. -Yes.
Saved it.
I never imagined I'd be inside this place.
It's only for rich tourists.
Well, today you are a rich tourist. If you ask me, you fit right in.
Cuban?
Uh, no. I'm Mexican.
A Cuban cigar.
Our clientele enjoy them with the drinks and view.
[in Spanish] No thank you.
Two 12 year old Lagavulin, please.
Neat.
Excellent choice.
-Nice delivery. I'm impressed. -[in English] Thank you.
After four years of Mr. Garcia's high school Spanish,
I picked up a few necessary phrases.
-Thank you. -Lady. You're welcome.
Sir. Here you are.
Mmm.
Mm-mmm. Very smooth.
[chokes, sputters]
You know what else? This place is even older than Las Colinas.
Really?
See that spot?
That's where Liz Taylor got married to Mike Todd. Cantinflas was his witness.
And that's where Hedy Lamarr posed for one of her famous portraits.
You really love this stuff, huh?
Sorry, I'm just excited to be here.
No. Don't get me wrong, this place is amazing.
But I wanna know more about you.
Where do all the locals go?
-Do you really want to know? -Yes.
I'm a journalism major. I wanna learn and see everything.
I know just the place.
-[Mexican music plays] -Güerito. Güerito.
Do you want to buy some handcrafts for the lady? A purse?
[in Spanish] No, thank you.
But here you go.
Ah.
Why is she calling you güerito? Doesn't that mean blonde?
[in English] Yeah. They call you that when they think you have money.
Which is why no one has called me that before.
[both chuckle]
Aw, this is so beautiful. Is this a daily thing?
Not quite. Today is the day of the Virgin of Guadalupe.
-Ah. -Very holy and sacred.
I'm sure my mom's been in church all morning.
Oh, and they celebrate this by apprehending little girls?
Oh, no, she's fine.
-She's just being forced into marriage. -Wait, what?
-It's a fake marriage. -Ah.
It's a street fair tradition.
If someone has a crush on you, they bring you to the fake judge
-for a fake wedding. -Okay.
[Máximo] And then you go back to your normal life.
Do you have this in New York City?
Oh, no. Our marriages are very real.
But sometimes just as short.
Becca Rosenthal, will you pretend-marry me?
-I thought you would never pretend-ask. -[chuckles]
[chuckles]
[knocking]
Máximo!
You're just in time!
[in Spanish] Oh, man, I haven't been this excited
since Farrah Fawcett skinny-dipped in our pool!
How did you know I was in here?!
Héctor tipped me off… for five bucks.
Okay, but be quiet! I don't want to get in trouble.
[knocking]
Mónica? What are you doing here?
[in Spanish] I'm here for the game I paid for!
[whistle blows on TV]
[cheering on TV, faint]
[in Spanish] Okay, let's do this.
I'm late for snack time.
So cute.
Do I look like a joke to you?!
[in Spanish] Actually, yes.
Marriage is a lifetime commitment.
Máximo, will you love Becca…
in sickness and in health?
Depends.
What kind of disease?
And how contagious is it?
Hey! Knock it off.
Earlier today I turned away a girl
who wanted to marry a boy just for his Atari.
Come on, just marry us already.
By the authority vested in me by the municipality of Acapulco,
I pronounce you husband and wife.
The court will now take a five-minute Frutsi break.
[Javier] One, two, three!
[singing in Spanish]
[singing continues]
Let's go, Barcelona! Kick Atletico's ass!
[shouts]
[groans]
I had no idea you were such a soccer fan, Lupe!
Why do you think I was calling Father Ramón?
To pray for the team?
No, he's my bookie.
[shushes]
[TV announcer in Spanish] GOAL! ATLÉTICO SCORES!
[all cheering]
[Beto cackling]
Will you fire me if I rub this in your face for just one moment?
[chuckles]
Then suck it, Lupe! Suck this tangerine.
What's up with Barcelona now?
Not such a hot team, is it?
How does it feel?
In your face, Lupe! In your face!!!
What's going on in here?
Whose idea was this?
Is that true?
[in English] Yes, sir.
Move over. You got the best seat.
Memo, come. Sit here.
I thought you'd be mad.
[in Spanish] Everyone here will work twice as hard for me for weeks
because I let them have this moment.
-[in English] How many minutes are left? -About five.
[all shout]
[in Spanish] I wasn't done praying. I had two more saints to go!
[in Spanish] Mom, we've been inside the church all day.
It's time to have fun.
I was having fun… with Jesus.
I had to ask him to protect Máximo's soul;
I'm worried the resort is changing him.
You're exaggerating.
How much can it change him in such a short time?
[in Spanish] Hi, mom.
Hi, Sara.
What's going on Mijo?
Why are you dressed like a gringo?
Becca's father loaned these to me.
That's me. I'm Becca. I'm visiting from New York.
Sin City!
That's Las Vegas. New York is the city that never sleeps.
Why don't they sleep?
Because they're up all night, sinning.
I don't think I quite understood everything you said,
but your son is adorable.
[in Spanish] Máximo is my husband!
[in English] Did I say that right?
Oh, yeah. I definitely said it right.
Mama, don't worry, it's just pretend.
Are you at least Catholic?
Catholic? No, my family are atheists.
They don't believe in God.
I know what it means!
-[in English] Oh, look. The Ferris wheel. -Oh, my God. Wow.
[TV announcer] Only two minutes left in sudden death…
Rodriguez kicks it to Hernandez. Hernandez has an opening and…
GOAL!!
Victory for FC Barcelona!--
[cheers, laughs]
Madrid Athletic? More like Madrid Pathetic!
Suck on these mandarins!
You suck it!
And you suck on these mandarins.
Okay, okay. Everybody, back to work.
[all grumbling]
[in Spanish] Oh, well!
Not for you.
I want you to split your earnings with Memo.
What earnings?
Of course, Don Pablo.
[guitar playing]
[no audible dialogue]
[Becca giggles]
Acapulco's amazing.
I think I could actually see myself living here one day.
Yeah. Maybe-- Maybe in that baby right there.
Oh, too bad.
I already called dibs on that one.
But it has a nice guesthouse if you wanna come visit.
[chuckles]
I don't want this day to end.
It doesn't have to.
Would you like to come up to my room?
What about your parents?
I think they should stay in their own room.
You have a room all to yourself?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, wait, wait. Um, what were you gonna do in her room?
[stammers] So, you-- you don't know yet?
Yeah, you know.
You don't know?
Wait, you're messing with me. You know.
You don't know.
[stammers] We played…
dominoes all night long.
And we also played dominoes again in the morning.
Twice.
I felt I finally found where I belonged.
Hello. I enjoyed dominoes last night.
To be honest, I've only played dominoes a couple times before.
I never knew there were so many variations.
I mean, you turn one domino upside down, and suddenly, it's a whole different game.
-Yeah, told you. -[both chuckle]
It's so weird that you guys just played dominoes all night
when you could have been having sex.
Damn it, Hu! I knew you knew!
[grunts] Anyway…
At that moment, I felt anything was possible,
including my future with Becca.
I didn't know how wrong I was.
-What is this? -A pen and paper.
Here in Mexico, we use this to write on.
But maybe you can use them to give me your phone number and address?
[both chuckle]
What? What is it?
Nothing. I had a great time yesterday.
Me too. That's why we should stay in touch.
Maybe I could visit the Big Apple one day.
That's sweet. But honestly,
we were just having fun and trying to forget, right?
Oh, yeah, sure.
-That is what we talked about. -Yes. Good.
So, I'm gonna jump in the shower.
And I was thinking,
maybe you can have housekeeping bring me more towels?
Thank you.
Julia. I thought you weren't supposed to be back till tomorrow.
-Did you and Chad have a good weekend? -I don't want to talk about it.
-[Becca chuckles] -[Máximo] I can't wait.
[Becca] Okay.
Take care of yourself.
It was very nice being married for a day.
Gracias.
[Máximo] Mr. Rosenthal.
Eh? Oh, hey. Thank you.
And thank you for distracting Becca yesterday.
-It was very kind. [chuckles] -My pleasure.
Oh, no. Keep 'em. They work for ya.
-Thank you. -Okay, let's go. Chop, chop.
-Chop, chop. Yeah. -Tail's up in an hour.
-[car door closes] -[engine revs]
Hey! You forgot your hat!
Like I said:
You're the staff. They are the guests.
It's a line that always divides us.
Even if you don't think it's there.
[in Spanish] But maybe one day!
Máximo! Get a mop and get a hose.
Some brat threw up near the pool.
It's in the chaise, in the cushions,
even in the cracks of the cement tiles.
You might need to scrape it out with a toothbrush if the mop doesn't work.
Also, it smells…
bad,
very, very, very bad.
Hold on.
You made me think it was a real marriage.
And you said that the story changed your life.
Instead, this was just a downer.
Well, that's what I thought too, at first.
Dude, why the long face?
What do you mean?
A girl walked all over my heart. I'm crushed.
Are you kidding me?
Máximo, think about what you did yesterday.
You got handed a bunch of money,
you drove around in a convertible,
you drank scotch at a fancy club,
and you had sex with a girl from New York.
Dude, you won.
You had the biggest, winningest day either of us have had in our lives.
Meanwhile, you know how my yesterday was?
My football team lost an important game.
Try to find a win in that.
-Morning, Memo! -Hey, Memo!
[in English] Looking good, Memo!
Okay, maybe a teeny-tiny win.
[both chuckle]
It took a while to sink in,
but my experience with Becca,
what it taught me, changed my life.
So what did it teach you?
That I…
could have more.
Memo and I had a little extra cash from the day before,
so after work that day, we got a special meal.
Just the two of us.
[in Spanish] Ah, I could get used to this.
[in Spanish] My thoughts, exactly.
No more dreaming, Memo.
From now on - we start turning our dreams into reality.
Oh, I bumped into Ximena, she mentioned Julia and Chad came back early.
They did?
Yeah, seems like their trip didn't go as planned.
I wonder what happened?
Yeah…
I wonder.
[Thin Lizzy's "The Boys Are Back In Town" plays]