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Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
M_I_SForEver
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[sirens blaring]
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[thunder rumbling]
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[tablet chimes]
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Before you say anything,
I'm not your brother.
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I'm your half-brother.
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What was that?
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Why would you begin
a conversation like that?
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Because you are about
to ask me for money,
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and when I always say,
"Why should I give you money?"
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you always say,
"Because I am your brother,"
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and I never point out
you are my half-brother.
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I never say it. But things
happening around here lately...
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Hi, Paxton. How are
your erratic head movements?
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I ask
because I read an article.
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Yeah, they're under control.
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How's the, uh,
cement art work?
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She just sold a piece
for $50,000.
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A frozen waterfall.
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It felt appropriate
for the times.
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How is it appropriate
for the times?
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You know what?
It doesn't matter.
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I was actually calling
to see how you were.
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'Cause I heard
it's bad in New York.
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It is bad.
They canceled the NBA.
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We heard London's
under total lockdown.
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I've been furloughed
by the way.
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- [David] That's great!
- Yeah.
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Now there is literally zero
purpose to my life.
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How is Linda?
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Yeah, she's somewhere
in the house.
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Is there
some type of issue?
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Is there an issue?
Let me see.
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Convenient lie to avoid
forensic examination
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of our domestic circumstances
or tell the truth?
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Okay, convenient lie.
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No. There is no issue.
We are fine.
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Can you tell her
I'm gonna Skype her?
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Also, David,
I've sold my motorbike.
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You've what?
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Yeah, I have a buyer.
He'll pay me
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when we are all unlocked
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from this fucking prison
of psychological hell-chains.
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Fucking flames
of burning aloneness.
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The screw of isolation
until you can't tell
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what is your body
and what is furniture.
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No possibility
of revving the engine
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and riding away. Am I conveying
anything of my mood to you?
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Why have you sold your bike?
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You are your bike.
Your bike is you.
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Yeah, I have sold myself.
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I have sold my former self.
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I felt sorry for the bike.
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It deserved someone who can do
justice to its spirit.
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Someone who still
breaks the fucking rules.
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So, you and Linda, what,
you had a fight?
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Linda said she was planning
to end our thing,
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our relationship,
our whatever this ever was,
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because we'd grown apart,
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meaning that she had gone up
and I have gone down.
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She was planning to end it
before lockdown was announced.
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[tablet beeping]
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...droplets and moisture
because we were shouting.
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I said some things
and she said some things
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and now
we are stuck here together
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with the things we said
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echoing around the house
like fucking bells ringing.
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For two weeks
we are locked together here.
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[doorbell ringing]
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Anyway. Truth be told,
I just wanted to hear someone's voice.
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- And you chose us?
- Yeah, why not?
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What happened to Mike?
Your friend Mike.
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Oh, no, no. Mike and I
are no longer speaking.
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He crossed...
My delivery!
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Crossed an important threshold
when, uh, when he said that
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the COVID virus
was the consequence
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of the secret release by Jews
of alien DNA
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into the
water sprinkling system
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of a Chinese golf resort.
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[Maria] It looks like
your food has arrived,
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- so we'll let you go.
- It's not food, it's a sandwich.
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Yeah, hang in, brother.
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- Half-brother.
- [Maria] Tell Linda I'm gonna call her.
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Yeah, I'll leave her a note.
Just to compound the oddness.
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[tablet beeps]
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[man on TV] The stark reality
of fighting Coronavirus...
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...Trafalgar Square in London
usually crowded.
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Evidence of social distancing
in action.
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In this critically
important time,
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the Prime Minister
Boris Johnson himself infected,
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but been sharing...
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[muffled screaming]
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[sighs]
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[Skype ringtone]
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Maria, hey!
Is everything okay?
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Oh, yeah, yeah.
Everything's great.
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You know, we're staying strong.
Yeah, we just talked to Paxton.
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Hmm. Yes, I head. Some of it.
I put a pillow over my head.
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He said you had symptoms.
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It passed I think. I hope.
I don't know.
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Oh, green smoothie.
You must send me that recipe.
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It's not a recipe,
it's an action.
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You just put the green stuff in
and press the on button.
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How are things
with you and Paxton?
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Is everything okay?
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You know
everything is not okay.
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Not only
is everything not okay,
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nothing is okay.
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Everything is never okay.
Even his name is not okay.
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This is him speaking. He says even
his name is a predictor of doom.
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That's how he is lately.
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[sighs] He's changed so much.
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Oh, we all change.
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I mean, Linda, you've evolved,
he's mutated.
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He needs some help.
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- I read an article...
- Do you know he said the other day
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that any man over 35
who rides a bus is a failure?
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- He rides the bus every day. Or he used to.
- [Maria talking indistinctly]
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- He does it to torture himself.
- No man is ever really fully conscious, not really.
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So, I heard
he's selling his motorbike.
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That's a big step.
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Yeah, we both agreed
that he needed some time,
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so he's planning on using
the money from selling the bike
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to go to Kazakhstan
to think about his life.
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Why Kazakhstan?
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We went on a road trip there
ten years ago.
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Ten years ago?
A million years ago.
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Anyway, now he is stuck here,
and I am stuck here.
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- Linda, is there someone else?
- Nope, just me and him.
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No, I mean, like,
another man.
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- No.
- A woman?
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What?
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I was just speculating.
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Thinking about that night we came to
London and you and I went too far.
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Oh, that was just weed
and curiosity.
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We both had orgasms, Linda.
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You know they say these calls
aren't really the most secure.
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I think
about that night sometimes.
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- You do?
- Yeah, don't you?
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Mmm... Listen, Maria,
I've been on Skype and Zoom calls all day.
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The office is locked down.
I really gotta get some sleep.
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- Okay, bye.
- Bye.
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- I love you.
- What?
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- God.
- [door slams]
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Paxton, are you
going somewhere?
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Where would I be going?
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Why is the hose
in your exhaust?
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[laughing]
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I was just gonna
take a selfie.
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Someone at work texted me
and asked how I was
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coping with lockdown.
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So I was gonna send
a photo of myself
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with the hose shoved
up my helmet by way of reply.
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I thought it'd be funny.
[laughs]
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An amusing expression
of despair.
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You were really
just gonna take a selfie?
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Yeah, I had the phone
in my hand.
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You weren't gonna
start the engine?
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And go where?
You can't go anywhere.
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I came in here and I could
smell the garage and the bike.
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And the smell...
it made me very sad for some reason.
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That shelf's covered in oil,
you're gonna get your ass covered in oil.
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- Jesus, what a day!
- Bad?
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No, just work.
I had some bad news.
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Nothing compared
to... everything.
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I really was just gonna
take a selfie, by the way.
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"By the way," "just so you know,"
"in case you were worried."
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Just... just a little game.
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Or a rehearsal.
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I'm not... Please don't think
I'm looking for anything.
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You know Maria just called me
and said that she loves me?
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- What?
- I know.
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Secrets coming out
all over the place.
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You got the key
to get back in?
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- No.
- I'll leave the door open for you.
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What's wrong?
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You playing
with the hoses and exhausts
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and we carry on
as if everything was normal.
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I'm not normal lately,
I know that.
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I haven't been
sleeping at all.
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I've never been normal, but...
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I used to be quite proud of it.
Now, I just...
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- Just what?
- I don't know.
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I'm just acutely aware
of the inconvenience it causes.
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My super analysis
of every grain of sand.
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Every word.
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Being locked up
is making it worse.
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00:10:02,567 --> 00:10:04,983
We have to find some way of
getting through this separately.
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00:10:05,067 --> 00:10:06,942
We're only together because
we're in the same house.
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We can sort of move around
each other until we're free...
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00:10:11,192 --> 00:10:13,275
- What? What is it?
- Oh, nothing. [clears throat]
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00:10:14,150 --> 00:10:15,817
Good night.
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00:10:15,900 --> 00:10:17,442
It's a bit of
Christmas decoration.
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00:10:17,525 --> 00:10:19,858
It's been there
since Christmas.
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00:10:19,942 --> 00:10:21,983
My therapist says
I should try to tolerate it.
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00:10:22,067 --> 00:10:23,650
To use it as a test.
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00:10:23,733 --> 00:10:25,108
Up until now, I've been able
to live with it,
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00:10:25,192 --> 00:10:27,025
as a test
to prove my progress.
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00:10:27,108 --> 00:10:29,025
Well, fuck progress.
200
00:10:29,108 --> 00:10:31,233
- Why don't you take it down?
- No, my therapist says...
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00:10:31,317 --> 00:10:34,442
- Fuck the therapist. Paxton...
- You almost did.
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00:10:34,525 --> 00:10:35,983
Grow up. Take it down.
203
00:10:36,067 --> 00:10:37,608
If it bothers you,
take it down, okay?
204
00:10:37,692 --> 00:10:39,858
Christmas is not exactly
a great memory anyway, is it?
205
00:10:39,942 --> 00:10:42,192
Christmas is not a great memory.
I agree with you.
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00:10:43,775 --> 00:10:45,442
Beginning of the end for us,
don't you think?
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00:10:45,525 --> 00:10:47,233
That was way before Christmas
for me.
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Sorry.
209
00:10:52,525 --> 00:10:54,692
Why do people think
honesty is good?
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00:10:58,650 --> 00:11:00,775
What are you doing
about therapy anyway?
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00:11:00,858 --> 00:11:02,608
I'm doing it on Zoom.
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00:11:02,692 --> 00:11:05,025
- My therapist has antlers on his wall.
- [laughs]
213
00:11:05,108 --> 00:11:07,233
These are extraordinary
circumstances, Paxton.
214
00:11:07,317 --> 00:11:08,900
You can't live with a woman
who has dumped you
215
00:11:08,983 --> 00:11:10,733
and a piece of tinsel
on the ceiling.
216
00:11:10,817 --> 00:11:13,483
- Have we decided to laugh about all this?
- Why not?
217
00:11:13,567 --> 00:11:15,067
Nothing else we can do
there, is there?
218
00:11:15,150 --> 00:11:16,317
Do you want a chair?
219
00:11:17,317 --> 00:11:18,817
Sure.
220
00:11:22,317 --> 00:11:24,275
[grunts]
221
00:11:24,358 --> 00:11:26,483
- [Paxton chuckles]
- [claps]
222
00:11:26,567 --> 00:11:28,400
Bravo.
223
00:11:28,483 --> 00:11:30,483
- Fuck! That's better.
- Hang on.
224
00:11:37,358 --> 00:11:40,025
You know, when I saw you
in the garage I thought...
225
00:11:41,817 --> 00:11:45,025
"Was it really me on the back of
your bike all those years ago?"
226
00:11:46,525 --> 00:11:47,858
Yeah, it was you.
227
00:11:49,858 --> 00:11:51,775
Hanging on and screaming.
228
00:11:54,025 --> 00:11:55,400
Well, that's what
I'm doing now.
229
00:11:55,483 --> 00:11:57,067
Hanging on and screaming,
but you can't hear me.
230
00:11:57,150 --> 00:11:59,025
Nobody can.
Anyway, good night.
231
00:12:00,442 --> 00:12:02,608
Screaming about what?
232
00:12:02,692 --> 00:12:06,983
What are you screaming about?
I'm the one that's screaming!
233
00:12:24,358 --> 00:12:25,442
[woman] Hello, stranger!
234
00:12:28,150 --> 00:12:30,858
- [Linda] Hi.
- How are you?
235
00:12:31,983 --> 00:12:34,025
[Linda] Terrible. You?
236
00:12:34,483 --> 00:12:35,608
Awful.
237
00:12:41,233 --> 00:12:43,608
[Paxton] Hello!
238
00:12:43,692 --> 00:12:47,525
Does anyone here in our lovely Portland
Street prison want to hear a little poem?
239
00:12:48,608 --> 00:12:50,525
I read a lot of poetry
240
00:12:50,608 --> 00:12:53,858
and I've read even more lately
'cause I can't sleep.
241
00:12:53,942 --> 00:12:55,775
It's actually quite a nice way
to discover
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00:12:55,858 --> 00:12:58,150
that you're not the only human
being on earth who's fucked up.
243
00:12:58,233 --> 00:12:59,400
[Linda] Paxton!
244
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,483
What the fuck
are you doing?
245
00:13:02,567 --> 00:13:04,775
[Paxton] I'm entertaining
our fellow inmates.
246
00:13:04,858 --> 00:13:08,817
This poem
is called Stand Up!
247
00:13:08,900 --> 00:13:10,692
It's by D.H. Lawrence,
by the way.
248
00:13:10,775 --> 00:13:12,733
"By the way," "just so you know,"
"in case you were worried."
249
00:13:15,317 --> 00:13:16,567
All right, here goes.
250
00:13:17,525 --> 00:13:20,608
"Stand up,
but not for Jesus!
251
00:13:21,442 --> 00:13:23,483
It's a little late for that.
252
00:13:23,567 --> 00:13:26,025
Stand up for justice
and a jolly life.
253
00:13:26,108 --> 00:13:27,650
I'll hold your hat.
254
00:13:27,733 --> 00:13:32,608
Stand up, stand up for justice,
ye swindled little blokes!
255
00:13:32,692 --> 00:13:37,025
Stand up and do some punching,
give 'em a few hard pokes.
256
00:13:37,108 --> 00:13:42,608
Stand up for a new arrangement
for a chance of life all round,
257
00:13:43,817 --> 00:13:46,775
for freedom
and the fun of living,
258
00:13:46,858 --> 00:13:49,275
break in,
and hold the ground!"
259
00:13:50,775 --> 00:13:53,567
- [people clapping]
- [chuckles]
260
00:13:54,108 --> 00:13:55,317
Thank you.
261
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,733
Sorry if I woke you.
262
00:13:57,817 --> 00:14:00,317
But I am going
slightly mad lately.
263
00:14:01,442 --> 00:14:04,317
My advice to everyone
264
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:07,067
is to use these strange
times we're all going through
265
00:14:07,150 --> 00:14:10,192
to steal all the things
that you think life owes you.
266
00:14:10,275 --> 00:14:11,900
[man] Go to sleep,
you bloody tosser!
267
00:14:11,983 --> 00:14:13,483
Yeah, well, if I could
I would.
268
00:14:13,567 --> 00:14:15,150
[man] Hey, leave him be, mate!
269
00:14:15,233 --> 00:14:17,983
And if I come across any other
good poems, I'll share it.
270
00:14:18,067 --> 00:14:19,733
[woman] We love it!
271
00:14:19,817 --> 00:14:21,108
Good night, Portland Street.
272
00:14:21,192 --> 00:14:22,525
[man] Night, night!
273
00:14:22,608 --> 00:14:24,025
[woman] Thank you!
274
00:14:34,483 --> 00:14:36,067
[grunts]
275
00:14:38,025 --> 00:14:41,025
God, please let me sleep.
276
00:14:43,858 --> 00:14:45,067
[glass shatters]
277
00:14:45,150 --> 00:14:47,192
[indistinct conversation]
278
00:15:00,025 --> 00:15:01,483
[girl] I swear to God!
279
00:15:01,567 --> 00:15:04,025
What the fuck are you doing
in my garden?
280
00:15:05,358 --> 00:15:06,775
You all right?
281
00:15:06,858 --> 00:15:09,525
- We're just gathering these.
- They're just poppies.
282
00:15:09,608 --> 00:15:11,067
They're bulbs of poppies.
283
00:15:11,150 --> 00:15:12,900
All the dealers in our estate
have been arrested,
284
00:15:12,983 --> 00:15:16,192
because they're the only people
out on the streets, innit?
285
00:15:16,275 --> 00:15:19,567
With these poppy bulbs,
you can make a sort of opium.
286
00:15:19,650 --> 00:15:21,650
You just slit the skins
and juice comes out.
287
00:15:22,650 --> 00:15:23,983
How did you know
they were here?
288
00:15:24,067 --> 00:15:26,608
We live in that tower block
up there, bro.
289
00:15:26,692 --> 00:15:29,400
Friend of ours has a telescope.
He's into stars and shit.
290
00:15:29,483 --> 00:15:31,650
We've been looking down
on houses for a laugh.
291
00:15:31,733 --> 00:15:35,567
Looking through windows and then we
saw all these growing in your garden.
292
00:15:35,650 --> 00:15:38,192
What the fuck are they all
doing growing in my garden?
293
00:15:38,275 --> 00:15:41,150
[girl] I think hippies used to
squat in these houses in the '70s.
294
00:15:41,233 --> 00:15:43,942
I think they grew them
and they just went wild.
295
00:15:44,025 --> 00:15:45,775
How do you refine
the juice?
296
00:15:45,858 --> 00:15:48,775
You don't. You just drip it
onto tobacco and then smoke it.
297
00:15:48,858 --> 00:15:51,650
Or you can mix it with Coca-Cola
if you want and drink it.
298
00:15:51,733 --> 00:15:55,192
Yeah, well, I don't smoke
anymore or drink Coca-Cola,
299
00:15:55,275 --> 00:15:57,483
or do drugs of any kind,
300
00:15:57,567 --> 00:16:02,692
but back in the bad old days I
did smoke quite a lot of heroin.
301
00:16:02,775 --> 00:16:04,275
This is not
as strong as heroin.
302
00:16:04,358 --> 00:16:06,858
It's quite a gentle hit.
303
00:16:06,942 --> 00:16:08,275
- It's organic, bro.
- Organic?
304
00:16:08,358 --> 00:16:09,900
Yeah.
305
00:16:09,983 --> 00:16:12,483
That would explain
the hedgehog.
306
00:16:12,567 --> 00:16:17,317
[laughs] There's a hedgehog in this garden
who is unusually friendly and relaxed.
307
00:16:22,650 --> 00:16:27,525
Would a very small amount
help you sleep, do you think?
308
00:16:27,608 --> 00:16:30,650
[boy] You sleep like a baby.
Smooths everything out.
309
00:16:30,733 --> 00:16:33,775
- No mean voices in the night.
- No mean voices in the night.
310
00:16:33,858 --> 00:16:37,275
That would be nice.
Well, well, well.
311
00:16:44,150 --> 00:16:45,567
[snores]
312
00:16:50,775 --> 00:16:52,108
[alarm beeping]
313
00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:08,608
[alarm beeping]
314
00:17:10,067 --> 00:17:11,150
[groans]
315
00:17:18,150 --> 00:17:19,483
Paxton!
316
00:17:22,608 --> 00:17:24,275
[groans]
317
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:35,692
[alarm continues beeping]
318
00:17:39,108 --> 00:17:41,483
Paxton, for fuck's sake!
319
00:17:42,108 --> 00:17:43,483
[alarm continues]
320
00:17:55,692 --> 00:17:56,817
[exhales]
321
00:18:02,858 --> 00:18:04,608
[laptop chimes]
322
00:18:04,692 --> 00:18:06,192
Hey, Toby!
323
00:18:07,275 --> 00:18:08,983
- Hi.
- Hey, how's the cough?
324
00:18:09,067 --> 00:18:11,942
A bit better I think.
How are you?
325
00:18:12,025 --> 00:18:13,900
I had it I think,
but it's passed.
326
00:18:13,983 --> 00:18:16,358
I hope. [chuckles]
It's like a Valkyrie.
327
00:18:17,067 --> 00:18:18,358
What?
328
00:18:18,442 --> 00:18:20,442
It's a Viking spirit who,
before battles, decides
329
00:18:20,525 --> 00:18:22,900
who will live
and who will die.
330
00:18:22,983 --> 00:18:27,983
Valkyries, uh,
make their choices with no reason.
331
00:18:28,067 --> 00:18:30,733
No morality,
no good or bad.
332
00:18:30,817 --> 00:18:33,650
It's just so unfair how some
people get so sick and some don't.
333
00:18:33,733 --> 00:18:36,567
Toby, you're back.
How are you?
334
00:18:36,650 --> 00:18:38,525
Gangster. Thank you.
335
00:18:38,608 --> 00:18:41,275
- Hello!
- Donald!
336
00:18:41,358 --> 00:18:43,650
[laughs] You got a tie on.
337
00:18:43,733 --> 00:18:45,317
One of my father's old ones.
338
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:48,733
I've become nostalgic
for old-fashioned formality.
339
00:18:48,817 --> 00:18:52,775
On these Zoom things, I always
imagine every man has an erection.
340
00:18:52,858 --> 00:18:54,067
- Ooh!
- [laughter]
341
00:18:54,150 --> 00:18:55,817
Donald, is that
your house?
342
00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:59,983
Uh, no. I'm at my mother's.
Anthony threw me out.
343
00:19:01,942 --> 00:19:06,192
Oh! That's not allowed,
is it?
344
00:19:06,275 --> 00:19:09,900
We had an awful night,
and everything came out.
345
00:19:09,983 --> 00:19:12,483
We found out we, uh,
hate each other. So...
346
00:19:12,567 --> 00:19:13,775
[laptop chimes]
347
00:19:13,858 --> 00:19:15,483
[Melissa] Hi!
348
00:19:15,567 --> 00:19:20,025
Uh, Melissa. Hey, how is Italy?
I hear it's bad there.
349
00:19:20,108 --> 00:19:21,692
No, I'm in Sweden.
350
00:19:22,817 --> 00:19:24,900
- What?
- Look.
351
00:19:26,108 --> 00:19:27,733
You can go to bars here.
352
00:19:27,817 --> 00:19:30,775
Hmm. Is anybody
obeying the rules?
353
00:19:31,900 --> 00:19:33,233
[vomiting]
354
00:19:35,817 --> 00:19:37,067
[groans]
355
00:19:37,150 --> 00:19:38,192
[coughs]
356
00:19:38,983 --> 00:19:40,150
[flushing]
357
00:19:44,108 --> 00:19:47,150
After ten years sober,
that was fucking smart.
358
00:19:49,817 --> 00:19:51,108
[coughs]
359
00:19:51,192 --> 00:19:53,400
Wait, who are we waiting for?
360
00:19:53,483 --> 00:19:56,858
- Timothy, I think.
- Oh, is Timothy okay?
361
00:19:56,942 --> 00:19:58,525
Why wouldn't he be?
362
00:19:58,608 --> 00:20:00,900
Well, he's got an
underlying health condition.
363
00:20:00,983 --> 00:20:02,900
- Do you know which one?
- No.
364
00:20:02,983 --> 00:20:04,400
He just seemed
like a sort of person
365
00:20:04,483 --> 00:20:06,400
who would have
an underlying health condition.
366
00:20:06,483 --> 00:20:08,692
Shall we just start
without Timothy?
367
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:12,567
By the way,
I am also wearing shoes.
368
00:20:12,650 --> 00:20:14,275
- [laughs]
- [Linda] Seriously, we should start.
369
00:20:14,358 --> 00:20:17,608
I have something to say.
Something important.
370
00:20:17,692 --> 00:20:19,983
- [clears throat]
- [cell phone chimes]
371
00:20:20,067 --> 00:20:23,275
Oh, um, hang on.
Oh, it's a message from Timothy.
372
00:20:26,233 --> 00:20:29,650
- God!
- Has he got it?
373
00:20:29,733 --> 00:20:31,442
"Dear, Linda.
As of 9:00 a.m. this morning,
374
00:20:31,525 --> 00:20:33,192
I am resigning my position
at Miracore Media
375
00:20:33,275 --> 00:20:35,817
with immediate effect.
I have had time alone to think
376
00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:37,608
and I've realized
that what this company does
377
00:20:37,692 --> 00:20:39,442
is just self-indulgent
media bullshit,
378
00:20:39,525 --> 00:20:42,108
supporting corrosive international
capitalism around the world.
379
00:20:42,192 --> 00:20:44,692
We should be using our
creativity to save the planet,
380
00:20:44,775 --> 00:20:48,275
not sell handbags to the
wives of fascist dictators.
381
00:20:48,358 --> 00:20:50,942
Yours in isolation. Timothy."
382
00:20:51,025 --> 00:20:56,400
Just been watching David Attenborough
documentaries, I imagine.
383
00:20:56,483 --> 00:20:57,692
Did he snap?
384
00:20:57,775 --> 00:20:59,567
Okay, so there's no need
to wait for Timothy.
385
00:20:59,650 --> 00:21:01,692
Let's get this done.
386
00:21:01,775 --> 00:21:03,650
Sounds awfully grave, Linda.
387
00:21:03,733 --> 00:21:06,650
- [kid] Daddy, Daddy.
- Shh. Daddy's on a call.
388
00:21:06,733 --> 00:21:08,233
[indistinct talking]
389
00:21:10,567 --> 00:21:14,108
Yesterday, I had a very long Zoom
call with head office in Chicago.
390
00:21:14,192 --> 00:21:16,817
All continents
were represented.
391
00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:18,775
And it seems
that all over the world
392
00:21:18,858 --> 00:21:21,983
the company is facing the same
issues at this difficult time.
393
00:21:22,067 --> 00:21:25,358
As CEO of Miracore UK,
it is my...
394
00:21:27,067 --> 00:21:29,483
unfortunate duty
to let you know
395
00:21:29,567 --> 00:21:33,192
that there will be some furloughing
of employees across the board.
396
00:21:34,608 --> 00:21:36,858
And also a number
of compulsory redundancies
397
00:21:36,942 --> 00:21:39,608
effective from today.
398
00:21:39,692 --> 00:21:46,817
I assume the Inuit system of leaving
the old on the ice will be in play.
399
00:21:46,900 --> 00:21:49,775
Donald, please don't jump
to conclusions.
400
00:21:49,858 --> 00:21:51,650
Linda, what do you mean?
401
00:21:51,733 --> 00:21:54,442
Uh, in normal times, I would've
gathered everyone into a room...
402
00:21:54,525 --> 00:21:56,442
[Natasha] Everyone?
403
00:21:57,442 --> 00:21:58,650
[Toby shushing]
404
00:22:00,775 --> 00:22:02,692
Everyone on this Zoom call
is on this call
405
00:22:02,775 --> 00:22:05,317
because all of your positions have
been deemed no longer sustainable,
406
00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:09,150
and as of today your contracts of employment
with Miracore will be terminated.
407
00:22:12,775 --> 00:22:13,775
Okay.
408
00:22:13,858 --> 00:22:15,692
I'm glad I'm home.
409
00:22:15,775 --> 00:22:17,775
I'm going to feed
the fucking chickens.
410
00:22:19,317 --> 00:22:21,983
This is really bad, Linda.
How do you sleep?
411
00:22:23,400 --> 00:22:24,733
[kid] Hello!
412
00:22:25,983 --> 00:22:27,900
[softly] Hello.
413
00:22:27,983 --> 00:22:30,233
[kid] Look at my dinosaur.
414
00:22:35,108 --> 00:22:36,692
Daddy...
415
00:22:37,692 --> 00:22:39,192
Malcolm, I thought
being furloughed
416
00:22:39,275 --> 00:22:41,067
meant that the government
pays your wages,
417
00:22:41,150 --> 00:22:42,525
but you don't do any work.
418
00:22:42,608 --> 00:22:44,108
[Malcolm] Yeah, it does,
it does, it does.
419
00:22:44,192 --> 00:22:45,525
But COVID
makes everything different.
420
00:22:45,608 --> 00:22:47,442
So sad. So sad.
421
00:22:47,525 --> 00:22:51,108
All of this is impacting on
everyone in my pastoral care.
422
00:22:51,192 --> 00:22:53,400
Yeah, but I'm not in
your pastoral care, right?
423
00:22:53,483 --> 00:22:54,983
I work for you.
424
00:22:55,067 --> 00:22:56,567
And all I wanna know is,
425
00:22:56,650 --> 00:22:59,192
if I am furloughed,
why are you asking me to work?
426
00:22:59,275 --> 00:23:00,317
It's illegal, isn't it?
427
00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:01,525
I'm a Christian man.
428
00:23:01,608 --> 00:23:03,400
We all know that you are
a Christian man.
429
00:23:03,483 --> 00:23:05,317
You say it like I ram it
down your throats.
430
00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:07,192
I do not ram it down
your fucking throat.
431
00:23:07,275 --> 00:23:10,192
Malcolm, just tell me,
what is it that you want me to do?
432
00:23:10,275 --> 00:23:11,858
We have a situation, Paxton.
433
00:23:11,942 --> 00:23:14,025
Yeah, I'm leaving this call
unless you tell me.
434
00:23:14,108 --> 00:23:15,317
I sat through your prayer.
435
00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:17,108
I begin every FaceTime
with a prayer.
436
00:23:17,192 --> 00:23:19,108
My choice. Right?
I'm the boss.
437
00:23:19,192 --> 00:23:22,442
Yeah, you are the boss.
So what do you want me to do, boss?
438
00:23:22,525 --> 00:23:25,775
Due to lockdown, all the major department
stores in the West End are closing.
439
00:23:25,858 --> 00:23:28,650
B2B Pro Freight Services are
among several freight companies
440
00:23:28,733 --> 00:23:33,650
which have been asked to transport valuable
retail items from the West End outlets
441
00:23:33,733 --> 00:23:37,483
to secure storage facilities
in shitholes like Dagenham.
442
00:23:37,567 --> 00:23:41,025
The fabric, Paxton,
of our society is torn, you see that.
443
00:23:41,108 --> 00:23:45,358
Fears of rioting and looting.
Pestilence. Apocalyptic words.
444
00:23:45,442 --> 00:23:48,192
I'm giving you ten seconds to tell
me what it is you want me to do.
445
00:23:48,275 --> 00:23:51,108
- Ten, nine, eight...
- Because of this crisis, we urgently need drivers.
446
00:23:51,192 --> 00:23:53,317
- Drivers like you.
- ...seven, six, five...
447
00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:55,775
Department stores only allow their
goods to be transported by drivers
448
00:23:55,858 --> 00:23:58,900
- who do not have criminal records.
- ...three, two...
449
00:23:59,817 --> 00:24:01,358
I repeat.
450
00:24:01,442 --> 00:24:04,983
B2B Pro Freight Services
have urgent need for drivers
451
00:24:05,067 --> 00:24:09,108
registered to us who do not
have criminal records.
452
00:24:09,192 --> 00:24:11,150
So why are you
talking to me?
453
00:24:11,233 --> 00:24:13,983
I have contracts to carry
valuables from 16 department stores
454
00:24:14,067 --> 00:24:17,650
across London, and they all want
everything out in the next four days.
455
00:24:17,733 --> 00:24:19,983
And I only have
two fucking drivers.
456
00:24:20,067 --> 00:24:21,442
So what's your solution?
457
00:24:21,525 --> 00:24:25,358
Deception. Forgiveness.
Redemption. Bunce.
458
00:24:25,442 --> 00:24:26,775
What the fuck is bunce?
459
00:24:26,858 --> 00:24:28,692
Old East End word
for cash, Paxton,
460
00:24:28,775 --> 00:24:30,483
in return
for grand deception.
461
00:24:30,567 --> 00:24:33,192
Facilitated by my forgiveness
and your redemption.
462
00:24:33,275 --> 00:24:34,858
All right, get there.
Get there, Malcolm.
463
00:24:34,942 --> 00:24:37,275
I've printed off an ID
with a security level A2.
464
00:24:37,358 --> 00:24:39,400
Clean. With your photo on it
and a name.
465
00:24:39,483 --> 00:24:41,483
It is not your name.
466
00:24:41,567 --> 00:24:43,108
I can't officially take you off
furlough and give you this work,
467
00:24:43,192 --> 00:24:45,317
because you used to be
a bike slag,
468
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,650
so I will have to pretend you are
someone else and pay you in cash.
469
00:24:47,733 --> 00:24:50,067
You've worked for this company
as a driver for seven years.
470
00:24:50,150 --> 00:24:51,692
And I have never had
a single complaint.
471
00:24:51,775 --> 00:24:53,733
You've only ever driven
low value packages,
472
00:24:53,817 --> 00:24:56,483
but I believe you are a man
who can be trusted.
473
00:24:58,942 --> 00:25:00,317
That I am.
474
00:25:01,775 --> 00:25:03,817
Yeah, I can be trusted.
475
00:25:03,900 --> 00:25:05,650
I mean, what happened
was a long time ago.
476
00:25:05,733 --> 00:25:06,900
Yeah, I don't wanna to know.
477
00:25:06,983 --> 00:25:08,775
No, it was biker versus biker.
478
00:25:08,858 --> 00:25:11,733
The Lord forgives.
B2B Pro Freight Services forgives.
479
00:25:11,817 --> 00:25:13,567
If it wasn't for the fucking
convictions from that night,
480
00:25:13,650 --> 00:25:15,400
my whole life would've been
radically different.
481
00:25:15,483 --> 00:25:17,317
Two hundred a day in cash.
482
00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:20,483
I don't care about the cash.
I wanna make a deal with you, Malcolm.
483
00:25:20,567 --> 00:25:22,525
Look, I will do this
on the condition
484
00:25:22,608 --> 00:25:25,442
that when this is all over, you will
consider me for a clerical position.
485
00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:27,150
My entire life
has been fucked up
486
00:25:27,233 --> 00:25:28,900
because of things I did
on one night.
487
00:25:28,983 --> 00:25:30,400
My wife...
488
00:25:30,483 --> 00:25:32,192
- [cell phone ringing]
- My wife has grown out of me,
489
00:25:32,275 --> 00:25:35,067
because I am still Mr. Fuck-All
behind the wheel of a van.
490
00:25:35,150 --> 00:25:36,650
I am not stupid.
491
00:25:36,733 --> 00:25:37,733
I read poetry.
492
00:25:37,817 --> 00:25:38,900
I could be someone.
493
00:25:38,983 --> 00:25:40,567
I've got another call,
Paxton.
494
00:25:40,650 --> 00:25:42,192
It is a very busy time,
the West End is going mad.
495
00:25:42,275 --> 00:25:43,483
Will you do it?
496
00:25:43,567 --> 00:25:44,858
All right, if I do this
for you, Malcolm,
497
00:25:44,942 --> 00:25:47,192
I want you to practice
what you preach.
498
00:25:47,275 --> 00:25:50,608
About forgiveness,
and lost sheep and redemption,
499
00:25:50,692 --> 00:25:53,108
all of it, and give me
a chance to come off the road.
500
00:25:53,192 --> 00:25:54,817
Everything
is possible, Paxton.
501
00:25:54,900 --> 00:25:56,817
God bless you.
502
00:25:56,900 --> 00:25:58,775
Selfridges, Thursday. Harvey
Nichols, Friday. Harrods on Saturday.
503
00:25:58,858 --> 00:26:00,608
- Right, yeah.
- I will e-mail your full itinerary
504
00:26:00,692 --> 00:26:02,108
and your new identity.
505
00:26:02,192 --> 00:26:05,025
Okay, okay. And after...
After Harrods on Saturday...
506
00:26:05,108 --> 00:26:06,733
God bless you, Paxton.
507
00:26:06,817 --> 00:26:08,858
- [call ends]
- [sighs]
508
00:26:14,150 --> 00:26:15,442
Shit.
509
00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:31,733
[Skype ringtone on laptop]
510
00:26:48,233 --> 00:26:51,817
Hey, Linda,
how's lockdown?
511
00:26:51,900 --> 00:26:54,150
[chuckles] It's pretty bad.
512
00:26:54,233 --> 00:26:55,650
How's Chicago?
513
00:26:56,358 --> 00:26:57,650
I'm in Vermont.
514
00:26:57,733 --> 00:26:59,733
Yeah, moved the family
out to Vermont.
515
00:26:59,817 --> 00:27:03,317
We're all here crazy happy.
516
00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:07,150
Kids make a lot of noise,
so I got these new AirPods Pro.
517
00:27:07,233 --> 00:27:10,525
Noise canceling. They work, like,
you literally can't hear anything.
518
00:27:10,608 --> 00:27:12,317
No, I don't have those.
519
00:27:13,275 --> 00:27:15,317
I can see in your face
520
00:27:15,400 --> 00:27:18,442
that you, uh, spoke to the guys at
Events and delivered the update.
521
00:27:18,525 --> 00:27:21,650
Update. Yeah.
Yeah, I updated them.
522
00:27:21,733 --> 00:27:24,192
- [clears throat]
- Did you read them my message?
523
00:27:25,775 --> 00:27:27,692
The stuff
about the Miracore family?
524
00:27:27,775 --> 00:27:31,275
No, no, no, I didn't think
that would translate. Um...
525
00:27:31,358 --> 00:27:36,483
Linda, I wrote that message from the heart.
I really meant what I said.
526
00:27:36,567 --> 00:27:38,567
I can't believe you didn't
read it out to them.
527
00:27:38,650 --> 00:27:41,567
I didn't think it was appropriate
to say that "Miracore is a family
528
00:27:41,650 --> 00:27:43,442
and there comes a time
in every family's life
529
00:27:43,525 --> 00:27:46,275
when it's best if some family
members fly the nest."
530
00:27:47,525 --> 00:27:49,025
Why is that not appropriate?
531
00:27:49,150 --> 00:27:50,650
Because they're not
flying the nest, are they?
532
00:27:50,733 --> 00:27:53,317
They're being
thrown out of the nest
533
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:54,900
into the long grass
under the tree.
534
00:27:54,983 --> 00:27:56,900
There's no tree.
What tree?
535
00:27:56,983 --> 00:27:59,400
It's your nest, Guy.
You came up with the analogy of the nest.
536
00:27:59,483 --> 00:28:01,108
So there has to be a tree.
537
00:28:01,192 --> 00:28:02,733
Do you have
a temperature, Linda?
538
00:28:04,650 --> 00:28:07,817
Um, there are two big events which were
already set up when lockdown began.
539
00:28:07,900 --> 00:28:09,567
One was at Westfield,
540
00:28:09,650 --> 00:28:11,483
the other one was the Eve Schwarz
store takeover at Harrods.
541
00:28:11,567 --> 00:28:13,400
But both Westfield and Harrods
have closed their door.
542
00:28:13,483 --> 00:28:14,692
I love Harrods.
543
00:28:14,775 --> 00:28:16,567
Yeah, I love Harrods, too.
544
00:28:16,650 --> 00:28:18,692
I worked there for five years,
they were the happiest of my life.
545
00:28:18,775 --> 00:28:20,733
Anyway, the launch of Eve Schwarz
collection was going to be huge,
546
00:28:20,817 --> 00:28:23,733
so I chose Harrods because of
its size and level of security.
547
00:28:23,817 --> 00:28:26,692
You chose? I thought Melissa
was head of events strategy.
548
00:28:26,775 --> 00:28:30,400
Yeah. Sometimes I questioned
her... It doesn't matter.
549
00:28:30,483 --> 00:28:33,733
You've been carrying that
department a long time.
550
00:28:33,817 --> 00:28:36,275
Yeah, well, they were family,
weren't they?
551
00:28:36,358 --> 00:28:38,275
And that's what
you do with family.
552
00:28:38,358 --> 00:28:40,233
You carry them until you get a
direction from Chicago to drop them,
553
00:28:40,317 --> 00:28:42,108
and then
you dutifully drop them.
554
00:28:42,192 --> 00:28:44,275
Anyway, at Harrods, we have five
million dollars worth of jewelry,
555
00:28:44,358 --> 00:28:46,608
clothing and accessories already
installed for the catwalk
556
00:28:46,692 --> 00:28:49,150
and store takeover
under Miracore liability.
557
00:28:49,233 --> 00:28:50,733
And that includes
the Harris Diamond
558
00:28:50,817 --> 00:28:52,775
which was to be
the centerpiece of the show.
559
00:28:52,858 --> 00:28:56,108
The Harris Diamond is under
our insurance liability?
560
00:28:56,192 --> 00:28:57,525
It's, um...
561
00:28:57,608 --> 00:29:01,650
It's safe in the Harrods'
secure vault, but, yes.
562
00:29:04,233 --> 00:29:07,483
I suggested to the people
at Eve Schwarz
563
00:29:07,567 --> 00:29:10,192
that we put everything into Harrods'
secure storage as quickly as possible
564
00:29:10,275 --> 00:29:12,025
[chuckles lightly]
until this, um...
565
00:29:12,150 --> 00:29:14,483
Uh, until this situation
is ended.
566
00:29:14,567 --> 00:29:17,275
But we have a problem
with insurance. You see...
567
00:29:19,150 --> 00:29:21,150
Uh...
568
00:29:21,233 --> 00:29:23,983
So, Eve Schwarz's
insurance policy
569
00:29:24,067 --> 00:29:25,817
means that they are not allowed
to store their merchandise
570
00:29:25,900 --> 00:29:27,650
except under their own
corporate supervision.
571
00:29:27,733 --> 00:29:29,483
So the merchandise
572
00:29:29,567 --> 00:29:31,775
will have to be taken out of the
store in secure transportation.
573
00:29:33,067 --> 00:29:35,108
Anyway, the stores
are allocating for collection.
574
00:29:35,192 --> 00:29:38,317
We have Westfield on Friday,
Harrods on Saturday.
575
00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:41,108
And then we discuss
your role and your salary.
576
00:29:41,192 --> 00:29:44,275
- [mouthing]
- There'll be a lot of new responsibilities.
577
00:29:44,358 --> 00:29:50,067
- Things are changing.
- That's excellent news. Thank you.
578
00:29:50,150 --> 00:29:52,067
[in British accent]
Say hello to London.
579
00:29:52,150 --> 00:29:54,733
- Enjoy Vermont.
- [in normal accent] You bet.
580
00:29:57,900 --> 00:30:00,192
What? Oh, fuck! Quinn!
581
00:30:00,275 --> 00:30:01,983
[call ends]
582
00:30:02,650 --> 00:30:03,983
[laughs]
583
00:30:09,233 --> 00:30:11,650
- [knock on door]
- [Paxton] I'm going to the land of the Walking Dead
584
00:30:11,733 --> 00:30:12,608
to buy some milk.
585
00:30:12,692 --> 00:30:14,025
Do we need anything else?
586
00:30:15,817 --> 00:30:19,692
I say the word "we" without any
attempt to suggest a unified entity,
587
00:30:19,775 --> 00:30:23,400
but there's no point in us both going
separately to get our own provisions.
588
00:30:24,733 --> 00:30:26,192
It's getting rough
out there.
589
00:30:26,275 --> 00:30:27,775
And increasingly, I think
590
00:30:27,858 --> 00:30:29,733
people like me who have
spent time in real prison
591
00:30:29,817 --> 00:30:31,400
are thriving
in this new reality.
592
00:30:31,483 --> 00:30:34,067
Oh, you know what, Paxton,
fuck it. Come in.
593
00:30:36,358 --> 00:30:41,733
All right, Paxton, here it is.
In addition to milk, I need cigarettes.
594
00:30:44,525 --> 00:30:47,192
- What?
- I was trying to hide that I'm smoking again,
595
00:30:47,275 --> 00:30:50,567
but since we're no longer together,
it doesn't really matter, does it?
596
00:30:50,650 --> 00:30:52,233
You are smoking?
597
00:30:52,317 --> 00:30:55,067
Yes. I plan to carry on
just until this thing is over.
598
00:30:55,150 --> 00:30:57,900
It's magnificent, actually.
599
00:30:57,983 --> 00:30:59,942
And when did you
start smoking again?
600
00:31:00,650 --> 00:31:02,108
Just before Christmas.
601
00:31:02,775 --> 00:31:04,275
Why?
602
00:31:04,358 --> 00:31:07,775
I started smoking again
when I went to Paris.
603
00:31:07,858 --> 00:31:09,400
- You went to Paris?
- Yes, I went to Paris.
604
00:31:09,483 --> 00:31:10,817
I didn't tell you
I went to Paris.
605
00:31:10,900 --> 00:31:13,025
Michael Essien invited me
to Paris and I went.
606
00:31:13,108 --> 00:31:14,817
Okay, my therapist
607
00:31:14,900 --> 00:31:18,192
identifies these moments
as confession avalanche.
608
00:31:20,858 --> 00:31:22,525
Who the fuck
is Michael Essien?
609
00:31:22,608 --> 00:31:23,817
He is the founder
of Miracore,
610
00:31:23,900 --> 00:31:25,442
seventh wealthiest man
in Germany.
611
00:31:25,525 --> 00:31:28,108
- And you went to Paris with him?
- Not quite.
612
00:31:28,192 --> 00:31:30,358
He invited the CEOs
from six countries
613
00:31:30,442 --> 00:31:32,650
to come to Paris for his
60th birthday celebration.
614
00:31:32,733 --> 00:31:34,775
Do you mind if I light this thing?
I've put it out twi...
615
00:31:34,858 --> 00:31:37,983
And, you know what? Actually,
it's my choice. Why am I even asking?
616
00:31:44,275 --> 00:31:46,358
When I got to the hotel,
there was this banqueting suite
617
00:31:46,442 --> 00:31:48,400
and I met six other CEOs
just like me,
618
00:31:48,483 --> 00:31:50,358
only I had just
become a CEO,
619
00:31:50,442 --> 00:31:52,942
so I didn't realize exactly who
I was until I saw the other CEOs,
620
00:31:53,025 --> 00:31:57,108
and then I was like, "Oh,
so that's who I am now."
621
00:31:57,192 --> 00:31:59,275
And we sat around this table,
drinking champagne,
622
00:31:59,358 --> 00:32:01,817
and the conversation was lots
of little voices saying "yes,"
623
00:32:01,900 --> 00:32:04,275
and one big voice saying
"good," Michael Essien's voice.
624
00:32:04,358 --> 00:32:07,650
And then the big voice said,
"Emerging markets" and I...
625
00:32:07,733 --> 00:32:10,858
You know how sometimes when people say
something abstract, I actually see it?
626
00:32:10,942 --> 00:32:13,400
Well, we did smoke a lot of
weed in the bad old days.
627
00:32:13,483 --> 00:32:18,150
When he said "Emerging
markets," I saw this...
628
00:32:18,233 --> 00:32:24,150
thing, this shape appearing from under
the table and swimming around our legs.
629
00:32:24,233 --> 00:32:28,150
I think I actually did have a
temperature that night. But, anyway,
630
00:32:28,233 --> 00:32:30,650
then he said "Cigarettes
and pharmaceuticals,"
631
00:32:30,733 --> 00:32:33,942
and I drank some champagne and
someone said "facilitators,"
632
00:32:34,025 --> 00:32:37,233
that is people who persuade governments
that products are safe and okay.
633
00:32:37,317 --> 00:32:41,733
And the big voice said that facilitators
were now a huge link in the chain
634
00:32:41,817 --> 00:32:45,025
and I saw this big chain
dripping seaweed
635
00:32:45,108 --> 00:32:47,983
and then the big voice
raised a toast to corruption,
636
00:32:48,067 --> 00:32:50,358
and everybody laughed
ironically, including me.
637
00:32:50,442 --> 00:32:51,775
Paxton, look at me!
638
00:32:55,108 --> 00:32:59,275
And this thing, this shape,
it was swimming around my fucking legs
639
00:32:59,358 --> 00:33:01,192
and then the big voice said,
emerging market
640
00:33:01,275 --> 00:33:03,608
were now some big percentage
of Miracore's profits,
641
00:33:03,692 --> 00:33:06,150
and so there would have to be
rationalization in Europe.
642
00:33:06,233 --> 00:33:08,358
And I drank some water,
because I felt a little sick,
643
00:33:08,442 --> 00:33:10,858
but also like I might pass out, but then
the waiter said "brandy," so I said yes.
644
00:33:10,942 --> 00:33:15,692
And, so, the rationalization
was planned right there
645
00:33:15,775 --> 00:33:17,858
at that table in Paris
before Christmas.
646
00:33:17,942 --> 00:33:20,567
And the nice people
that I fired earlier today,
647
00:33:20,650 --> 00:33:23,233
they weren't fired because
of a virus, like I told them,
648
00:33:23,317 --> 00:33:26,150
that was a lie. They were fired
because of this...
649
00:33:26,233 --> 00:33:27,942
this thing, this shape,
650
00:33:28,025 --> 00:33:30,233
that swam with me
all the way back to my room,
651
00:33:30,317 --> 00:33:35,567
and to get rid of it, I used the disgusting
glass swan to smash a full length mirror,
652
00:33:35,650 --> 00:33:37,567
and rather then walk across
broken glass all night,
653
00:33:37,650 --> 00:33:39,650
I decided to take the
last train home to London,
654
00:33:39,733 --> 00:33:41,442
and when I got
to the Gare du Nord station,
655
00:33:41,525 --> 00:33:43,567
a homeless woman came up to me
and asked me for a cigarette.
656
00:33:43,650 --> 00:33:45,900
I told her that I didn't smoke,
but I decided to buy her a pack anyway,
657
00:33:45,983 --> 00:33:48,192
because I thought that maybe
kindness might make me feel better
658
00:33:48,275 --> 00:33:51,108
about what I had become.
And when she lit her cigarette,
659
00:33:51,192 --> 00:33:53,067
I decided
to have a cigarette, too.
660
00:33:53,150 --> 00:33:55,233
And when I drew in
the smoke,
661
00:33:55,317 --> 00:33:58,900
the thing stopped swimming.
662
00:34:00,483 --> 00:34:04,358
So I sat down on the bench
and I waited for my train.
663
00:34:05,858 --> 00:34:08,775
And that is why
I started to smoke again.
664
00:34:12,317 --> 00:34:16,192
But... to complete the answer
to your original question,
665
00:34:16,275 --> 00:34:19,817
in addition to milk
and cigarettes, we need bread
666
00:34:20,567 --> 00:34:22,733
and fucking wine.
667
00:34:25,817 --> 00:34:27,192
God!
668
00:34:27,692 --> 00:34:29,567
God what?
669
00:34:29,650 --> 00:34:31,358
Well, it sounds like
you did have a temperature.
670
00:34:31,442 --> 00:34:33,192
You know, they say this thing
was around before Christmas.
671
00:34:33,275 --> 00:34:35,108
Paxton, no!
It's not about the virus.
672
00:34:35,192 --> 00:34:39,733
It's about me realizing who I
am and what I do for a living.
673
00:34:41,192 --> 00:34:43,192
Although a complete
re-examination of one's life
674
00:34:43,275 --> 00:34:44,858
does seem to be
a COVID side effect.
675
00:34:45,858 --> 00:34:47,400
- You smashed a mirror?
- Yeah.
676
00:34:47,483 --> 00:34:48,733
Yeah, because I was in it.
677
00:34:48,817 --> 00:34:50,733
I also smashed
a champagne bottle,
678
00:34:50,817 --> 00:34:52,942
some champagne glasses, and I was about
to smash a glass horse and jockey,
679
00:34:53,025 --> 00:34:54,400
but then
I decided to keep it,
680
00:34:54,483 --> 00:34:56,525
but then I left it
on the fucking train.
681
00:34:56,608 --> 00:35:00,233
Basically, I went, what you
used to call, "Full Viking."
682
00:35:00,317 --> 00:35:01,733
In fact,
when I broke the mirror
683
00:35:01,817 --> 00:35:04,108
and I saw my furious face
in the cracked glass,
684
00:35:04,192 --> 00:35:06,817
- I thought of you.
- [chuckles] That's very sweet. Thank you.
685
00:35:11,067 --> 00:35:12,400
Why didn't you tell me?
686
00:35:15,233 --> 00:35:19,733
It was the onset of winter.
Our winter.
687
00:35:19,817 --> 00:35:21,567
And anyway,
I didn't tell anybody,
688
00:35:21,650 --> 00:35:25,608
because if you don't tell
anybody, then it didn't happen.
689
00:35:25,692 --> 00:35:28,233
- Did you get a bill for the mirror?
- Paxton...
690
00:35:28,317 --> 00:35:31,858
Paxton, fuck the mirror.
It's not about the mirror, it's about...
691
00:35:38,192 --> 00:35:40,942
Previously, at this point,
692
00:35:41,025 --> 00:35:43,358
- I would've hugged you.
- No, really, there's no need.
693
00:35:43,442 --> 00:35:45,108
And anyway, besides,
you're going shopping.
694
00:35:45,192 --> 00:35:50,275
So, uh, milk, bread,
wine, cigarettes.
695
00:35:50,358 --> 00:35:53,608
- And probably eggs.
- I'm gonna put white flour on the list.
696
00:35:53,692 --> 00:35:55,192
I'm gonna make bread.
697
00:35:55,275 --> 00:35:57,608
- Please don't.
- You know...
698
00:35:59,025 --> 00:36:01,858
what you just said
wasn't a confession.
699
00:36:01,942 --> 00:36:03,233
I didn't say
it was a confession.
700
00:36:03,317 --> 00:36:04,358
'Cause you didn't do
anything wrong.
701
00:36:04,442 --> 00:36:06,358
No, it was an explanation.
702
00:36:06,442 --> 00:36:07,692
You did everything right.
703
00:36:09,775 --> 00:36:11,900
You wanna hear a confession?
704
00:36:11,983 --> 00:36:17,192
This morning I overslept,
because last night I took opium.
705
00:36:18,650 --> 00:36:20,400
[laughs] Yes!
706
00:36:20,942 --> 00:36:22,608
Yes.
707
00:36:22,692 --> 00:36:24,358
Much worse
than your cigarettes.
708
00:36:24,442 --> 00:36:28,733
I licked opium off little
green bulbs from the garden.
709
00:36:28,817 --> 00:36:30,317
- No, you didn't.
- Yes, I did.
710
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:32,108
Our garden
is full of heroin.
711
00:36:32,192 --> 00:36:33,483
You go beyond the washing line,
it's like the Helmand Province.
712
00:36:33,567 --> 00:36:36,067
After ten years, Paxton?
713
00:36:36,150 --> 00:36:38,067
Smoking isn't
so great either.
714
00:36:38,150 --> 00:36:40,483
You know, I've had
some setbacks lately.
715
00:36:40,567 --> 00:36:42,525
Yeah, well,
you know what, Paxton?
716
00:36:42,608 --> 00:36:44,525
You know that green smoothie that
I have in the mornings since Paris,
717
00:36:44,608 --> 00:36:46,067
there's two shots
of vodka in it.
718
00:36:46,150 --> 00:36:47,567
- Just two but...
- You are lying.
719
00:36:47,650 --> 00:36:49,358
No, I'm not.
720
00:36:49,442 --> 00:36:51,442
Not every morning,
but some mornings I do it. I have done it.
721
00:36:51,525 --> 00:36:54,858
You think I'm so happy and normal
is 'cause I keep getting promoted.
722
00:36:54,942 --> 00:36:56,650
People get confused.
723
00:36:56,733 --> 00:36:58,358
No, I've never accused you of
being happy and normal, Linda.
724
00:36:58,442 --> 00:37:03,442
'Cause I'm not! All right?
I see concepts.
725
00:37:03,525 --> 00:37:04,775
I should've been an artist.
726
00:37:04,858 --> 00:37:06,442
You are unhappy
in an outwardly "happy,
727
00:37:06,525 --> 00:37:08,775
let's pretend it's all fine"
female way,
728
00:37:08,858 --> 00:37:11,650
and I am unhappy
in an obviously thwarted,
729
00:37:11,733 --> 00:37:14,108
- unfulfilled, castrated male way.
- I can't. I can't.
730
00:37:14,192 --> 00:37:15,942
Do not go down
this road again, okay?
731
00:37:16,025 --> 00:37:19,317
Just go to the store.
Milk, bread, wine, cigarettes, eggs.
732
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:21,608
Yeah, and fuck you,
I'm buying flour.
733
00:37:21,692 --> 00:37:24,108
Fine! Wait.
Do you have a mask?
734
00:37:27,983 --> 00:37:29,608
No, I don't
have a mask, no.
735
00:37:29,692 --> 00:37:32,650
Well, you'll have to tie something
around your mouth and nose.
736
00:37:41,900 --> 00:37:43,608
Fuck!
737
00:37:45,608 --> 00:37:47,108
My old bandana.
738
00:37:47,192 --> 00:37:50,483
Hmm. Yeah, well,
it's no longer a symbol of rebellion.
739
00:37:50,567 --> 00:37:52,067
It's now government advice.
740
00:38:01,692 --> 00:38:05,192
You were wearing that when I met
you in Sturgis, South Dakota.
741
00:38:06,858 --> 00:38:09,025
I thought you looked
like a desperado.
742
00:38:09,108 --> 00:38:11,150
No, I was just trying to get
the dust out of my mouth.
743
00:38:11,233 --> 00:38:12,483
Don't spoil it.
744
00:38:15,942 --> 00:38:19,067
Don't forget the milk
and the eggs, Desperado.
745
00:38:20,317 --> 00:38:22,525
[imitates gun whooshing]
746
00:38:23,275 --> 00:38:26,025
[piano music playing]
747
00:38:40,608 --> 00:38:42,942
Oi! Move forward.
748
00:38:43,442 --> 00:38:44,900
Oi!
749
00:38:44,983 --> 00:38:46,650
Go ahead then.
750
00:38:46,733 --> 00:38:47,900
[Paxton] Fuck off.
751
00:38:51,442 --> 00:38:52,692
Oi. How many asses
have you got?
752
00:38:52,775 --> 00:38:53,775
[man] Fuck off!
753
00:38:54,650 --> 00:38:56,858
[piano music continues]
754
00:39:23,983 --> 00:39:27,067
[mouse clicking]
755
00:39:36,483 --> 00:39:38,233
[knock on door]
756
00:39:43,025 --> 00:39:44,483
Paxton.
757
00:39:47,025 --> 00:39:50,983
Hearing the story about Paris
out loud, it made me think...
758
00:39:51,067 --> 00:39:53,942
When lockdown's over,
I'm going to think about leaving Miracore.
759
00:39:54,442 --> 00:39:56,483
[exhales]
760
00:39:56,567 --> 00:39:57,983
Why are you telling me?
761
00:40:11,983 --> 00:40:13,567
[ringing]
762
00:40:18,025 --> 00:40:18,942
[sighs]
763
00:40:23,192 --> 00:40:24,525
You called?
764
00:40:24,608 --> 00:40:26,108
Oh, Lord who art in heaven,
I beseech you,
765
00:40:26,192 --> 00:40:27,900
look favorably upon
Paxton and myself
766
00:40:27,983 --> 00:40:29,483
and forgive us
the sin of deception
767
00:40:29,567 --> 00:40:31,150
which we are jointly
about to commit
768
00:40:31,233 --> 00:40:33,442
in pursuit of his ultimate
redemption. Amen.
769
00:40:35,483 --> 00:40:37,275
Amen.
770
00:40:37,358 --> 00:40:39,067
Every prayer is tailored to
suit the person I am calling.
771
00:40:39,150 --> 00:40:41,525
Either it's me writing
the words or it's Jesus.
772
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:44,192
What do you want, Malcolm?
773
00:40:44,275 --> 00:40:46,067
I've got your fake ID sorted.
774
00:40:46,150 --> 00:40:48,233
Virginia is delivering
the ID card.
775
00:40:48,317 --> 00:40:50,650
I wanted to make sure
you'd be in.
776
00:40:50,733 --> 00:40:52,567
You know what, Malcolm?
Everybody's in.
777
00:40:52,650 --> 00:40:54,317
And I've sent you
your new name.
778
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:56,358
I texted it to you.
It's on your phone.
779
00:40:57,067 --> 00:40:58,817
Okay.
780
00:40:58,900 --> 00:41:02,483
A new name for the beginning
of a new life.
781
00:41:03,442 --> 00:41:06,358
And my new name is...
782
00:41:10,775 --> 00:41:12,025
Edgar Allen Poe.
783
00:41:12,108 --> 00:41:13,275
[Malcolm] Yeah.
784
00:41:15,275 --> 00:41:16,775
Yeah, uh...
785
00:41:18,067 --> 00:41:20,233
Yeah. Malcolm, I obviously
can't use this name.
786
00:41:20,317 --> 00:41:21,525
Why not?
787
00:41:21,608 --> 00:41:22,858
I'm hoping this is a joke,
788
00:41:22,942 --> 00:41:24,150
but I know you,
so it's probably not.
789
00:41:24,233 --> 00:41:25,275
What joke?
790
00:41:26,942 --> 00:41:28,192
Okay.
791
00:41:28,275 --> 00:41:30,983
Edgar Allan Poe is the name
of a famous,
792
00:41:31,067 --> 00:41:32,358
like a...
793
00:41:32,442 --> 00:41:34,567
like a very famous
American novelist and poet.
794
00:41:34,650 --> 00:41:36,108
Never heard of him.
795
00:41:36,192 --> 00:41:37,525
Well, I assure you,
796
00:41:37,608 --> 00:41:41,400
Edgar Allan Poe is actually
a very famous
797
00:41:41,483 --> 00:41:43,358
American writer who I'm
actually very fond of.
798
00:41:43,442 --> 00:41:45,067
It was me that came up
with Edgar.
799
00:41:45,150 --> 00:41:46,567
It's my grandad's name.
800
00:41:46,650 --> 00:41:48,275
So who came up
with the "Allen Poe" part?
801
00:41:48,358 --> 00:41:49,817
Martin in dispatch.
802
00:41:50,317 --> 00:41:51,775
Fuck.
803
00:41:51,858 --> 00:41:53,900
Martin in dispatch
hates me.
804
00:41:53,983 --> 00:41:56,483
He's deliberately suggested
this to make my life strange
805
00:41:56,567 --> 00:41:57,858
and unbearable.
806
00:41:57,942 --> 00:41:59,483
Well, the card's
already been laminated.
807
00:41:59,567 --> 00:42:02,317
Malcolm, I can't go into
expensive department stores
808
00:42:02,400 --> 00:42:03,525
in the West End, right,
809
00:42:03,608 --> 00:42:05,733
and expect them
to entrust me
810
00:42:05,817 --> 00:42:07,983
with valuable clothing
and jewelry,
811
00:42:08,067 --> 00:42:11,067
and tell them that my name
is Edgar Allen fucking Poe!
812
00:42:11,150 --> 00:42:13,817
If he's so famous,
how come I've never heard of him?
813
00:42:13,900 --> 00:42:15,483
'Cause you don't
read books!
814
00:42:15,567 --> 00:42:17,067
I read the Good Book.
815
00:42:17,150 --> 00:42:18,567
But he's not in the Bible, obviously.
He's an American.
816
00:42:18,650 --> 00:42:21,025
Anybody here ever heard
of a writer
817
00:42:21,108 --> 00:42:22,692
called Edgar Allan Poe?
818
00:42:23,942 --> 00:42:25,150
No?
819
00:42:25,233 --> 00:42:26,442
No one. There you go.
820
00:42:26,525 --> 00:42:27,775
[Paxton] I know there's
no one there.
821
00:42:27,858 --> 00:42:28,483
They are all
working from home.
822
00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:30,650
Martin's here.
823
00:42:30,733 --> 00:42:32,067
This was his idea!
824
00:42:32,150 --> 00:42:34,942
Well, the card's
already been laminated.
825
00:42:35,025 --> 00:42:36,108
[sighs]
826
00:42:36,192 --> 00:42:38,525
All right, look, I grant you
that 90%
827
00:42:38,608 --> 00:42:40,442
of the security guards
working the night shift
828
00:42:40,525 --> 00:42:42,108
in the West End
would not have heard
829
00:42:42,192 --> 00:42:43,358
of Edgar Allan Poe.
830
00:42:43,442 --> 00:42:44,733
Basically dealing with robots.
831
00:42:44,817 --> 00:42:46,442
But I am an unlucky person.
832
00:42:46,525 --> 00:42:49,775
Fate has a way of doing these
little experiments on me.
833
00:42:49,858 --> 00:42:51,525
Card's already laminated
834
00:42:51,608 --> 00:42:53,983
and Martin has a new name
badge made for your uniform.
835
00:42:54,067 --> 00:42:55,442
It's all in the envelope.
836
00:42:55,525 --> 00:42:56,858
By some chance,
837
00:42:56,942 --> 00:42:58,733
choosing the name
of a gloomy,
838
00:42:58,817 --> 00:43:02,400
introspective peddler of darkness
is actually quite appropriate
839
00:43:02,483 --> 00:43:03,900
to my character,
but please...
840
00:43:06,067 --> 00:43:08,983
just give me a new card
under a different name.
841
00:43:09,067 --> 00:43:11,067
The robots don't give
a fuck about the name,
842
00:43:11,150 --> 00:43:12,650
they just look
at the photo.
843
00:43:12,733 --> 00:43:14,233
You are due at Selfridges'
loading bay B
844
00:43:14,317 --> 00:43:15,983
at 1800 hours tonight.
845
00:43:16,067 --> 00:43:18,067
Wear your uniform
with your name tag.
846
00:43:18,150 --> 00:43:20,025
Flash your ID.
847
00:43:20,108 --> 00:43:23,150
Look, if you want to back
out, say so now.
848
00:43:23,233 --> 00:43:24,942
I can't get into
trouble again, all right?
849
00:43:25,025 --> 00:43:28,483
This could be construed
as deception
850
00:43:28,567 --> 00:43:29,567
and attempted robbery.
851
00:43:29,650 --> 00:43:30,942
You counted me down,
852
00:43:31,025 --> 00:43:33,358
I'll count you down,
you fucker.
853
00:43:33,442 --> 00:43:37,192
Five, four, three, two...
854
00:43:37,275 --> 00:43:39,900
Fuck! All right, all right.
I'll do it.
855
00:43:39,983 --> 00:43:41,358
Good.
856
00:43:41,442 --> 00:43:44,483
Details are on the text.
God bless you, Paxton.
857
00:43:44,567 --> 00:43:45,525
[call ends]
858
00:43:48,275 --> 00:43:50,108
[doorbell chiming]
859
00:43:58,275 --> 00:44:01,108
[sighs] No need to sign.
I know him.
860
00:44:01,192 --> 00:44:02,442
Are you his other half?
861
00:44:03,317 --> 00:44:04,692
[Linda] Yes, yes, I am.
862
00:44:04,775 --> 00:44:06,525
[Virginia] He's so dry,
isn't he?
863
00:44:06,608 --> 00:44:08,233
Yes, he is. [laughs]
864
00:44:08,317 --> 00:44:10,233
[Virginia] Hello, Paxton.
865
00:44:10,317 --> 00:44:12,192
I was just saying
you're very funny.
866
00:44:12,275 --> 00:44:15,067
Yes, I am.
I am hilarious.
867
00:44:15,150 --> 00:44:17,233
[Virginia] We think he's too
clever to be driving vans.
868
00:44:17,317 --> 00:44:19,858
We don't know why he
doesn't get a better job.
869
00:44:19,942 --> 00:44:21,317
Well, that's easy.
870
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:23,067
It's 'cause ten years ago,
I beat a man senseless
871
00:44:23,150 --> 00:44:24,650
in a bikers' roadhouse
in Watford.
872
00:44:24,733 --> 00:44:25,983
[laughs] See?
873
00:44:26,067 --> 00:44:28,525
He's always saying
silly things.
874
00:44:28,608 --> 00:44:30,192
He's so dry.
875
00:44:30,275 --> 00:44:32,442
[Paxton] Give my regards to
Martin, would you, Virginia?
876
00:44:32,525 --> 00:44:34,733
- [Virginia] Mmm-hmm.
- Tell him this won't be forgotten.
877
00:44:34,817 --> 00:44:36,317
Okay.
878
00:44:36,400 --> 00:44:37,942
See you when
the madness is over.
879
00:44:38,025 --> 00:44:40,317
Yeah, well, for some of us,
the madness never ends.
880
00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:42,317
[Virginia laughs]
881
00:44:44,317 --> 00:44:47,400
[door closes, locks]
882
00:44:47,483 --> 00:44:49,942
Never forget,
the man you beat senseless deserved it.
883
00:44:50,025 --> 00:44:52,067
Please don't talk about
people deserving things.
884
00:44:52,150 --> 00:44:54,733
If it wasn't for you, a little man
called Archie Bruce would be dead.
885
00:44:54,817 --> 00:44:56,942
What you want,
justice next?
886
00:44:57,025 --> 00:44:59,358
I know that you had
a bad break,
887
00:44:59,442 --> 00:45:01,067
- but going forward...
- "Going forward"?
888
00:45:01,150 --> 00:45:02,900
When lockdown is over
and we are apart,
889
00:45:02,983 --> 00:45:04,983
you have to stop believing
that fate is against you. Okay?
890
00:45:05,067 --> 00:45:06,983
You have to stop believing
the name Paxton
891
00:45:07,067 --> 00:45:08,233
is a precursor of doom.
892
00:45:08,317 --> 00:45:10,858
Yes, well,
my name isn't Paxton.
893
00:45:13,525 --> 00:45:14,483
Yeah.
894
00:45:22,692 --> 00:45:23,858
[steam hisses]
895
00:45:29,525 --> 00:45:31,692
[Linda groans]
896
00:45:31,775 --> 00:45:35,150
Paxton, you can't go through with
this, you're gonna get caught.
897
00:45:35,233 --> 00:45:37,233
If you're doing it for cash,
I'll give you the cash.
898
00:45:37,317 --> 00:45:38,983
I am not doing it
for the cash.
899
00:45:39,067 --> 00:45:42,233
I'm doing it for the opportunity
to have a better life.
900
00:45:42,317 --> 00:45:44,233
But why am I telling you?
901
00:45:47,525 --> 00:45:48,692
[chuckles]
902
00:45:50,942 --> 00:45:53,150
[sighs] Fuck.
903
00:45:53,733 --> 00:45:55,442
[rain pattering]
904
00:45:57,358 --> 00:45:58,567
[man] Paxton.
905
00:46:00,108 --> 00:46:02,483
[motorbike revving
in distance]
906
00:46:03,275 --> 00:46:04,650
[Paxton exhales]
907
00:46:10,067 --> 00:46:12,108
[brakes screeching]
908
00:46:20,900 --> 00:46:22,150
Oh!
909
00:46:25,692 --> 00:46:27,067
Oh.
910
00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:34,442
Fuck 'em.
911
00:46:37,817 --> 00:46:40,858
And Linda seemed kind of
detached from the whole thing.
912
00:46:40,942 --> 00:46:41,942
Hey.
913
00:46:42,442 --> 00:46:43,525
Detached?
914
00:46:44,317 --> 00:46:45,275
Hi, Linda.
915
00:46:45,358 --> 00:46:46,525
We were talking about you.
916
00:46:46,608 --> 00:46:48,025
We were all just saying
917
00:46:48,108 --> 00:46:49,358
that we love that
you're always so professional.
918
00:46:49,442 --> 00:46:51,483
Detached from what
whole thing?
919
00:46:51,567 --> 00:46:53,358
I was saying
you handled the situation
920
00:46:53,442 --> 00:46:56,317
with Events without too much
feeling getting in the way.
921
00:46:57,900 --> 00:46:58,983
You fired them well.
922
00:47:00,275 --> 00:47:02,942
I did. Thank you.
923
00:47:03,025 --> 00:47:04,025
Good.
924
00:47:05,483 --> 00:47:08,692
Linda, is that
a glass of wine?
925
00:47:08,775 --> 00:47:10,483
Oh, yes, yeah, it is.
926
00:47:10,567 --> 00:47:12,025
Well...
927
00:47:12,108 --> 00:47:13,900
it says wine on the label
928
00:47:13,983 --> 00:47:15,317
but it tastes like something used
to clean something off of a surface.
929
00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:16,317
Paxton chose it.
930
00:47:16,400 --> 00:47:17,442
Who's Paxton?
931
00:47:17,525 --> 00:47:19,150
[Linda] Mmm, anyway...
932
00:47:19,233 --> 00:47:21,400
we have a problem,
so shall we get on?
933
00:47:28,692 --> 00:47:29,775
Hello, Martin.
934
00:47:30,567 --> 00:47:32,483
Hello, Edgar.
935
00:47:32,567 --> 00:47:34,067
You know,
from my observation of you
936
00:47:34,150 --> 00:47:35,650
since I joined the company,
937
00:47:35,733 --> 00:47:38,483
you represent the longest
and most well-managed
938
00:47:38,567 --> 00:47:40,567
nervous breakdown
in history.
939
00:47:40,650 --> 00:47:43,400
Why don't you go somewhere
warm and count your grievances?
940
00:47:43,483 --> 00:47:45,733
I've disinfected the van
for you.
941
00:47:45,817 --> 00:47:48,942
Everything you need
is in there.
942
00:47:49,025 --> 00:47:52,775
You know, when Malcolm told me he was
giving you an A2 security clearance,
943
00:47:52,858 --> 00:47:54,400
I advised him against it.
944
00:47:54,483 --> 00:47:56,442
B2B normally keep
lowlifes like you
945
00:47:56,525 --> 00:47:59,233
away from high-value cargo
for a reason...
946
00:47:59,317 --> 00:48:01,108
Temptation.
947
00:48:01,192 --> 00:48:03,192
You forgot to put the keys to the
van inside the envelope, Martin.
948
00:48:04,817 --> 00:48:07,900
I've read your
human resources profile.
949
00:48:07,983 --> 00:48:11,108
My personal record is meant
to be confidential,
950
00:48:11,192 --> 00:48:13,233
but for your
personal record, Martin,
951
00:48:13,317 --> 00:48:15,858
I'm a different person now.
Give me the fucking keys.
952
00:48:15,942 --> 00:48:17,400
Perhaps Malcolm
didn't tell you.
953
00:48:17,483 --> 00:48:19,108
The estimated value
of tonight's cargo
954
00:48:19,192 --> 00:48:22,442
out of Selfridges
is £50,000.
955
00:48:22,525 --> 00:48:25,275
The value of your collection
from Harvey Nichols on Friday
956
00:48:25,358 --> 00:48:27,025
is just under £100,000.
957
00:48:27,108 --> 00:48:28,442
But on Saturday night,
958
00:48:28,525 --> 00:48:30,358
when you go to Harrods,
959
00:48:30,442 --> 00:48:33,483
you'll be driving away from the
world's most glamorous department store
960
00:48:33,567 --> 00:48:35,775
with jewelry and accessories
in your van
961
00:48:35,858 --> 00:48:37,983
worth over
three million pounds.
962
00:48:38,692 --> 00:48:39,817
Now think on this.
963
00:48:39,900 --> 00:48:41,525
You'll be wearing
a mask and gloves,
964
00:48:41,608 --> 00:48:43,525
you'll be using
a false identity.
965
00:48:43,608 --> 00:48:45,233
Outside, the streets
will be empty.
966
00:48:45,317 --> 00:48:46,733
Store security
on quarter staff
967
00:48:46,817 --> 00:48:48,983
with big holes
caused by absences.
968
00:48:49,067 --> 00:48:50,650
What more could
a lowlife need
969
00:48:50,733 --> 00:48:52,275
to pull off
the perfect robbery.
970
00:48:52,358 --> 00:48:54,692
You refer to me as "lowlife"
one more time...
971
00:48:54,775 --> 00:48:56,858
You'll what?
Revert to type.
972
00:48:56,942 --> 00:48:59,150
Okay, here goes,
one more time.
973
00:48:59,233 --> 00:49:01,608
Lowlife.
974
00:49:01,692 --> 00:49:04,733
You know, Malcolm told me that if
you do okay in the next few nights,
975
00:49:04,817 --> 00:49:07,025
he's gonna put you
in customer services.
976
00:49:07,108 --> 00:49:09,150
Goin' out
and meeting clients.
977
00:49:09,233 --> 00:49:10,608
'Cause you're so funny
978
00:49:10,692 --> 00:49:13,400
and you're so dry and
you make the girls laugh.
979
00:49:13,483 --> 00:49:15,150
Whereas I've been stuck
in dispatches
980
00:49:15,233 --> 00:49:16,942
for seven and a half years.
981
00:49:17,025 --> 00:49:19,400
You have to stop thinking the
whole world's against you, Martin.
982
00:49:23,567 --> 00:49:25,358
Do it, Paxton.
983
00:49:25,442 --> 00:49:28,650
Take the opportunity
that fate has given you.
984
00:49:30,733 --> 00:49:32,483
[wind howling]
985
00:49:36,233 --> 00:49:39,442
Exactly how much product do
Eve Schwarz have in Harrods?
986
00:49:39,525 --> 00:49:42,775
Uh, approximately three million
pounds' jewelry and accessories.
987
00:49:42,858 --> 00:49:44,108
Harrods wants everything
out of the store
988
00:49:44,192 --> 00:49:45,442
and it's
our responsibility...
989
00:49:45,525 --> 00:49:47,525
Oh, you've frozen, Linda.
990
00:49:48,317 --> 00:49:50,150
[Linda] Can you hear me?
991
00:49:50,233 --> 00:49:52,525
Yeah, I can hear you,
just your face is frozen.
992
00:49:52,608 --> 00:49:56,483
You've got this look
of exasperation.
993
00:49:56,567 --> 00:50:00,775
Uh, someone's gonna have to go into
Harrods and pack the valuables up
994
00:50:00,858 --> 00:50:03,775
and check the inventory
and count everything out.
995
00:50:03,858 --> 00:50:05,400
And it's gonna have
to be someone that we trust.
996
00:50:05,483 --> 00:50:07,608
Someone who is familiar
with the stock,
997
00:50:07,692 --> 00:50:09,317
and knows how
the Harrods system works.
998
00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:11,400
So that means, inevitably,
it's going to be me, isn't it?
999
00:50:11,483 --> 00:50:14,067
Okay, but there's this,
another second reason for this call.
1000
00:50:14,150 --> 00:50:17,400
Michael Essien has decided.
He wants to give you a promotion.
1001
00:50:17,483 --> 00:50:19,400
[woman]
He wants to bring you home.
1002
00:50:19,483 --> 00:50:22,983
Back to New York
to run the East Coast.
1003
00:50:23,650 --> 00:50:25,067
Uh...
1004
00:50:25,150 --> 00:50:27,108
Wow, God. Um...
1005
00:50:27,192 --> 00:50:28,525
Exciting.
1006
00:50:28,608 --> 00:50:29,942
A unexpected
turn of events
1007
00:50:30,025 --> 00:50:31,483
and cheap wine
don't pair well together.
1008
00:50:31,567 --> 00:50:35,025
Um, I'm gonna have to, uh,
really think about this.
1009
00:50:35,108 --> 00:50:37,400
Uh, right, good night.
1010
00:50:37,483 --> 00:50:38,442
Yeah, thank you.
1011
00:50:38,525 --> 00:50:39,983
I mean... [hesitates]
1012
00:50:40,067 --> 00:50:41,400
- [man] Linda, it's exciting...
- [line disconnects]
1013
00:50:41,483 --> 00:50:42,525
[Linda exclaims]
1014
00:50:45,733 --> 00:50:48,483
A frozen look
of exasperation.
1015
00:50:48,567 --> 00:50:53,608
[man on radio] ...and that is his
second son, Carl Philipp Emauel Bach
1016
00:50:53,692 --> 00:50:55,608
and here's his Symphony No. 4.
1017
00:50:55,692 --> 00:50:58,858
[classical music
playing on radio]
1018
00:51:54,150 --> 00:51:55,733
[clanging]
1019
00:51:55,817 --> 00:51:57,317
It's just that after
our call last night,
1020
00:51:57,400 --> 00:51:59,358
we became worried about
Paxton's state of mind.
1021
00:51:59,442 --> 00:52:01,567
We worry that
he might implode or explode.
1022
00:52:01,650 --> 00:52:04,067
[Maria] Knowing Paxton,
he'll probably implode rather than explode.
1023
00:52:04,150 --> 00:52:05,942
What's the difference?
1024
00:52:06,025 --> 00:52:08,150
[Maria] When you implode,
you withdraw within yourself,
1025
00:52:08,233 --> 00:52:10,358
when you explode,
you impose yourself on the outer world.
1026
00:52:10,442 --> 00:52:12,400
David, for example,
when he gets angry, he implodes.
1027
00:52:12,483 --> 00:52:14,192
When I get angry,
I explode.
1028
00:52:14,275 --> 00:52:16,442
- I can also explode if I have to.
- Rarely.
1029
00:52:16,525 --> 00:52:18,025
[chuckles] You've obviously never
seen me in business meetings.
1030
00:52:18,108 --> 00:52:20,192
Well, actually I have.
Since lockdown.
1031
00:52:20,275 --> 00:52:22,108
[David] You've heard me through the
wall, you haven't seen me.
1032
00:52:22,192 --> 00:52:23,567
[Maria] Okay, then,
I haven't heard you explode.
1033
00:52:23,650 --> 00:52:25,150
I've actually been
very surprised
1034
00:52:25,233 --> 00:52:27,400
about how submissive you are
in meetings.
1035
00:52:27,483 --> 00:52:29,608
- Submissive?
- You're the boss, David, you should act like the boss.
1036
00:52:29,692 --> 00:52:32,442
- Anyway, just to reassure you, Paxton's okay.
- [indistinct argument]
1037
00:52:32,525 --> 00:52:34,900
In fact, Paxton maybe
getting a promotion.
1038
00:52:35,942 --> 00:52:37,817
Linda, are you
drinking alone?
1039
00:52:37,900 --> 00:52:40,567
No, I've got three firemen
waiting for me in the kitchen.
1040
00:52:40,650 --> 00:52:43,400
Since lockdown, David has
been drinking so much more.
1041
00:52:43,483 --> 00:52:47,358
Yes, David,
isn't it wonderful?
1042
00:52:47,442 --> 00:52:49,900
We now keep a record.
We count the bottles.
1043
00:52:49,983 --> 00:52:52,067
- I don't care.
- Your body cares.
1044
00:52:52,150 --> 00:52:54,483
Your body counts the bottles and
keeps an inventory in you liver.
1045
00:52:54,567 --> 00:52:58,900
David, my fellow drinker,
I'd like to tell you a secret.
1046
00:52:58,983 --> 00:53:01,233
- What secret?
- You know, Linda,
1047
00:53:01,317 --> 00:53:03,317
there have been many
occasions in my life
1048
00:53:03,400 --> 00:53:05,442
where I've had a few glasses of
wine and in the next morning,
1049
00:53:05,525 --> 00:53:08,233
I woke up like, "Golly. Wow.
I wish I hadn't said that."
1050
00:53:08,317 --> 00:53:11,317
Oh, I've done that
so many times, too.
1051
00:53:11,400 --> 00:53:13,483
You know, my mantra is,
secrets and wine
1052
00:53:13,567 --> 00:53:15,483
- don't go great together.
- Let her tell me the secret.
1053
00:53:15,567 --> 00:53:17,233
I think he's gonna
like this secret.
1054
00:53:17,317 --> 00:53:18,858
I think you're gonna like this
secret, David, very much.
1055
00:53:18,942 --> 00:53:20,900
Something he's gonna like,
you don't know.
1056
00:53:20,983 --> 00:53:22,858
- No, he might not.
- What the fuck are you two talking about?
1057
00:53:22,942 --> 00:53:24,317
- [Linda] The secret is this.
- He might not be in a place
1058
00:53:24,400 --> 00:53:25,775
where it's okay.
He watches Fox.
1059
00:53:25,858 --> 00:53:27,900
It is I who am buying
Paxton's motorbike.
1060
00:53:30,483 --> 00:53:32,150
[David] What?
1061
00:53:32,233 --> 00:53:33,608
When he said he was
selling it,
1062
00:53:33,692 --> 00:53:35,983
I arranged a dealer
to buy it anonymously.
1063
00:53:36,067 --> 00:53:38,067
I'm gonna buy it
and give it back to him.
1064
00:53:38,692 --> 00:53:39,817
My parting gift.
1065
00:53:45,275 --> 00:53:47,442
For a while I've known
I had to leave him.
1066
00:53:47,525 --> 00:53:48,608
But...
1067
00:53:50,525 --> 00:53:53,692
But losing the bike, yeah,
that's too much.
1068
00:53:55,358 --> 00:53:57,108
And the bike means
something to me, too.
1069
00:53:57,192 --> 00:53:59,400
You know, youth.
1070
00:53:59,483 --> 00:54:05,108
Cigarettes. Bad, bad wine
chosen by Paxton.
1071
00:54:06,650 --> 00:54:09,067
[sighs]
1072
00:54:09,150 --> 00:54:10,775
- [David] Wow, that's...
- Linda, that's awesome.
1073
00:54:10,858 --> 00:54:12,733
But here's the thing, David.
I want you to tell him
1074
00:54:12,817 --> 00:54:14,692
that it's you
who is buying the bike
1075
00:54:14,775 --> 00:54:16,442
and giving it back to him.
I don't want him to know that it's me.
1076
00:54:18,567 --> 00:54:19,858
[David] Why?
1077
00:54:21,317 --> 00:54:22,692
It'll hurt him less.
1078
00:54:24,025 --> 00:54:25,817
He really
is quite prehistoric.
1079
00:54:25,900 --> 00:54:27,150
[breathes heavily]
1080
00:54:27,233 --> 00:54:29,567
I'm a bit drunk
and I hate people
1081
00:54:29,650 --> 00:54:31,233
who get emotional
on these things, so...
1082
00:54:31,317 --> 00:54:33,067
[call ends]
1083
00:54:40,983 --> 00:54:42,317
[exhales]
1084
00:54:44,483 --> 00:54:46,358
[sobbing]
1085
00:54:54,400 --> 00:54:55,692
Fuck.
1086
00:54:59,608 --> 00:55:04,858
[saucepans clanging]
1087
00:55:09,483 --> 00:55:11,817
[woman] Making noise
for the NHS.
1088
00:55:15,442 --> 00:55:19,067
[man on radio] We've got
Beethoven's Piano Concerto No. 3.
1089
00:55:27,692 --> 00:55:28,942
[horn honking]
1090
00:55:29,025 --> 00:55:30,567
- [Paxton] Whoo!
- [classical music playing]
1091
00:55:35,275 --> 00:55:37,567
[yelling]
1092
00:55:37,650 --> 00:55:38,775
Whoo!
1093
00:55:41,400 --> 00:55:42,775
[horn honking]
1094
00:55:43,650 --> 00:55:44,608
[yelling]
1095
00:55:47,067 --> 00:55:49,025
[people cheering]
1096
00:56:05,275 --> 00:56:06,442
Hey.
1097
00:56:08,275 --> 00:56:10,275
Couldn't sleep.
1098
00:56:10,358 --> 00:56:13,567
If the wine didn't work,
go and lick the garden.
1099
00:56:13,650 --> 00:56:16,067
[Linda chuckles]
How was it tonight?
1100
00:56:17,650 --> 00:56:20,858
Every security person I met
was under the age of 12,
1101
00:56:20,942 --> 00:56:23,317
and every one of them was
too busy playing Fortnite
1102
00:56:23,400 --> 00:56:25,192
to fully acknowledge my ID.
1103
00:56:25,275 --> 00:56:28,650
Anyway, I think for the young
generation, great literature is dead.
1104
00:56:28,733 --> 00:56:32,442
I could have had an ID card
with William Shakespeare on it.
1105
00:56:32,525 --> 00:56:34,900
[chuckles] How many more
pick-ups do you have?
1106
00:56:34,983 --> 00:56:37,775
Um, tomorrow,
Harvey Nichols
1107
00:56:37,858 --> 00:56:40,108
and then,
Saturday, Harrods.
1108
00:56:40,192 --> 00:56:41,608
[gulps]
1109
00:56:41,692 --> 00:56:43,358
[coughs] Harrods?
Saturday night?
1110
00:56:43,442 --> 00:56:45,275
It's all gone mad
out there.
1111
00:56:45,358 --> 00:56:49,108
One of the security guards was
telling me about franchise managers
1112
00:56:49,192 --> 00:56:53,108
are taking out diamond rings
and watches in plastic bags
1113
00:56:53,192 --> 00:56:54,650
and getting into Ubers.
1114
00:56:54,733 --> 00:56:56,608
What are you
taking out of Harrods?
1115
00:56:56,692 --> 00:56:58,233
I don't know.
1116
00:56:58,317 --> 00:57:00,233
Martin says it's over
three million pounds worth.
1117
00:57:00,317 --> 00:57:02,525
No co-drivers
'cause of COVID.
1118
00:57:02,608 --> 00:57:04,817
Carrying it to where?
1119
00:57:04,900 --> 00:57:08,525
Uh, the docket says Heathrow.
Ten o'clock flight to New York.
1120
00:57:08,608 --> 00:57:10,900
Harrods to Heathrow,
Saturday night,
1121
00:57:10,983 --> 00:57:13,317
three million pounds,
ten o'clock flight.
1122
00:57:13,400 --> 00:57:15,233
Look, there's the hedgehog.
1123
00:57:17,900 --> 00:57:19,192
Oh, no, he's gone.
1124
00:57:19,275 --> 00:57:20,942
[rain pattering]
1125
00:57:21,025 --> 00:57:22,483
Ah, he's gone.
1126
00:57:24,442 --> 00:57:25,692
How was your evening?
1127
00:57:26,608 --> 00:57:28,983
Okay, um, Paxton.
Here it is.
1128
00:57:29,067 --> 00:57:31,858
You can't do that pick-up
at Harrods on Saturday.
1129
00:57:31,942 --> 00:57:34,317
You really can't.
1130
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:35,650
What are you talking about?
1131
00:57:35,733 --> 00:57:37,567
Okay, do you remember
once I asked you,
1132
00:57:37,650 --> 00:57:39,108
do you believe in God,
and you said that
1133
00:57:39,192 --> 00:57:42,275
you believe that he's busy
on another project,
1134
00:57:42,358 --> 00:57:43,858
but occasionally he puts
his head around the door?
1135
00:57:43,942 --> 00:57:45,942
Well, I think this may be
one of those occasions,
1136
00:57:46,025 --> 00:57:49,942
'cause God or fate or the virus or
somebody put our paths on the cross.
1137
00:57:50,025 --> 00:57:51,525
[inhales]
1138
00:57:51,608 --> 00:57:53,525
On Saturday, I will be in
Harrods packing up the cargo
1139
00:57:53,608 --> 00:57:55,358
that you are due to carry.
1140
00:57:55,442 --> 00:57:57,025
Fuck.
1141
00:57:57,108 --> 00:57:58,733
What are you
talkin' about? I...
1142
00:57:59,483 --> 00:58:01,858
I have to do the pick-up.
1143
00:58:01,942 --> 00:58:03,692
If you do,
you will be caught.
1144
00:58:03,775 --> 00:58:05,400
It doesn't matter
what name you're using.
1145
00:58:05,483 --> 00:58:07,025
It's a fake name and I have
implemented cross-checks.
1146
00:58:07,108 --> 00:58:08,692
You won't make it
past the door.
1147
00:58:08,775 --> 00:58:12,150
I know, because it's my
system that will stop you!
1148
00:58:18,942 --> 00:58:21,858
I'm sorry. And what the fuck,
don't even begin.
1149
00:58:21,942 --> 00:58:25,025
I can't fucking
get anywhere!
1150
00:58:29,733 --> 00:58:31,650
I mean...
1151
00:58:31,733 --> 00:58:33,442
Can't you just tell them
that you know me?
1152
00:58:33,525 --> 00:58:34,900
That...
1153
00:58:34,983 --> 00:58:37,942
That you know I can be trusted.
That I am your...
1154
00:58:39,358 --> 00:58:41,358
That I was your partner.
1155
00:58:45,233 --> 00:58:47,025
- What?
- It doesn't work like that.
1156
00:58:47,525 --> 00:58:48,900
And I...
1157
00:58:50,942 --> 00:58:52,650
Since joining Miracore
three years ago,
1158
00:58:52,733 --> 00:58:55,400
I haven't told anyone
I have a partner.
1159
00:58:55,483 --> 00:58:58,233
Partly because I wanted
to keep work separate.
1160
00:58:58,317 --> 00:59:00,233
Yeah, but mostly because
you were embarrassed
1161
00:59:00,317 --> 00:59:01,858
to have a partner
that drives a van.
1162
00:59:04,233 --> 00:59:07,108
Yes. All of the above.
I... [exhales]
1163
00:59:07,192 --> 00:59:09,317
But now,
I am looking at myself.
1164
00:59:09,400 --> 00:59:11,275
Since lockdown,
I'm looking back at myself
1165
00:59:11,358 --> 00:59:13,025
like that was then
and this is now.
1166
00:59:13,108 --> 00:59:14,733
Well, good for you, Linda,
1167
00:59:14,817 --> 00:59:16,317
but if I don't make this
collection on Saturday night,
1168
00:59:16,400 --> 00:59:19,733
then, not only will Malcolm
not promote me,
1169
00:59:19,817 --> 00:59:21,150
he will fire me.
1170
00:59:22,858 --> 00:59:25,275
I could always
start dealing heroin.
1171
00:59:26,358 --> 00:59:27,942
Lowlife is lowlife.
1172
00:59:31,025 --> 00:59:34,400
No job. No bike.
1173
00:59:36,858 --> 00:59:37,900
No you.
1174
00:59:49,733 --> 00:59:53,150
When I worked at Harrods,
I had so much fun.
1175
00:59:53,233 --> 00:59:55,608
I knew everyone.
Everyone knew me.
1176
00:59:55,692 --> 00:59:57,442
Most of them
still work there...
1177
00:59:57,525 --> 00:59:59,025
Is there any possibility we might
get back to me for a moment?
1178
00:59:59,108 --> 01:00:00,150
I mean, I'm the one
whose life is fucked.
1179
01:00:00,233 --> 01:00:01,650
No, no, this is about you.
1180
01:00:01,733 --> 01:00:03,442
All right, I know all the
security guards, everyone.
1181
01:00:03,525 --> 01:00:06,150
- I know the security systems.
- So?
1182
01:00:06,233 --> 01:00:08,233
So there is a way for you to
make your pick-up at Harrods
1183
01:00:08,317 --> 01:00:10,067
and deliver to Heathrow
without getting caught.
1184
01:00:10,150 --> 01:00:12,442
You will get your promotion
and I will get my stock removed
1185
01:00:12,525 --> 01:00:13,650
and no one will know.
1186
01:00:13,733 --> 01:00:15,525
But we will be
breaking the law.
1187
01:00:15,608 --> 01:00:20,150
So you're gonna have to do absolutely
everything I tell you to do.
1188
01:00:20,233 --> 01:00:23,400
[alarm ringing]
1189
01:00:43,608 --> 01:00:46,817
[Michael] Michael Morgan. Acting
Deputy Head, Harrods' Events Security.
1190
01:00:46,900 --> 01:00:48,942
Yes, you are
in my old department.
1191
01:00:49,025 --> 01:00:50,817
How's life at Harrods?
1192
01:00:50,900 --> 01:00:53,025
I only just joined.
I used to be in the Royal Navy.
1193
01:00:53,108 --> 01:00:54,858
Oh, quite a change then.
1194
01:00:54,942 --> 01:00:57,358
Not really. No, Harrods
is like a big ship.
1195
01:00:57,442 --> 01:00:58,900
[Linda] Oh. Okay.
1196
01:00:58,983 --> 01:01:01,442
I mean, there are,
obviously, huge differences.
1197
01:01:01,525 --> 01:01:03,150
Of course.
1198
01:01:03,233 --> 01:01:05,025
Yeah, and not just in terms
of the shape of the building
1199
01:01:05,108 --> 01:01:07,858
or the fact that
it doesn't float.
1200
01:01:07,942 --> 01:01:09,858
- You know, it's...
- Oh, yeah.
1201
01:01:09,942 --> 01:01:12,358
Yeah, the working environment
must be very different, I imagine.
1202
01:01:12,442 --> 01:01:14,733
Yes, it is.
Lot of women here.
1203
01:01:14,817 --> 01:01:16,192
- Yeah.
- Yes.
1204
01:01:16,275 --> 01:01:18,067
Yeah, on the ship,
there was only four.
1205
01:01:18,150 --> 01:01:19,775
And, uh, two of them
were called Karen.
1206
01:01:19,858 --> 01:01:21,900
Called them Karen one
and Karen two.
1207
01:01:21,983 --> 01:01:23,608
I think Kate's
meant to be joining us?
1208
01:01:23,692 --> 01:01:25,233
- Kate Smith, yes, from Events.
- Oh.
1209
01:01:25,317 --> 01:01:26,442
When I knew her,
she was Kate Wiley.
1210
01:01:26,525 --> 01:01:28,733
She must have
gotten married.
1211
01:01:28,817 --> 01:01:30,275
Yeah, she did get married, yeah,
but it all went horribly wrong, I think.
1212
01:01:30,358 --> 01:01:32,317
Oh, sorry to hear that.
1213
01:01:32,400 --> 01:01:34,317
What happened?
1214
01:01:34,400 --> 01:01:35,900
I don't know. They don't talk
to me about that sort of thing.
1215
01:01:35,983 --> 01:01:37,858
- [laptop chimes]
- Linda!
1216
01:01:37,942 --> 01:01:39,192
Katie!
1217
01:01:39,275 --> 01:01:40,900
Oh my God,
Oh, my God. How are you?
1218
01:01:40,983 --> 01:01:43,233
Oh, my gosh. You know,
I'm surviving.
1219
01:01:43,317 --> 01:01:44,733
Linda, you have gone off
like a rocket!
1220
01:01:44,817 --> 01:01:45,983
- Oh, stop.
- I mean, my God.
1221
01:01:46,067 --> 01:01:47,567
When they said
CEO Miracore,
1222
01:01:47,650 --> 01:01:49,567
I thought, "Okay, God,
some bald man,"
1223
01:01:49,650 --> 01:01:51,733
- but then I saw your name.
- [Linda laughs]
1224
01:01:51,817 --> 01:01:54,858
Linda was just asking what went
wrong with your marriage. She...
1225
01:01:54,942 --> 01:01:57,775
- was just askin'.
- No. No, no, no. I wasn't. I didn't.
1226
01:01:57,858 --> 01:01:59,442
When a man is shorter
than you
1227
01:01:59,525 --> 01:02:00,942
and then suddenly decides
1228
01:02:01,025 --> 01:02:02,817
to let his beard grow
very, very long
1229
01:02:02,900 --> 01:02:05,233
and then becomes obsessed
with so called "white magic,"
1230
01:02:05,317 --> 01:02:07,275
it can just get very creepy
very quickly.
1231
01:02:07,358 --> 01:02:09,442
- [Linda chuckles]
- Anyway, what can we do for you?
1232
01:02:09,525 --> 01:02:11,567
[Linda] I have an update about the
Eve Schwarz clear-out on Saturday.
1233
01:02:11,650 --> 01:02:13,483
You see, all the secure freight
companies have been booked
1234
01:02:13,567 --> 01:02:16,025
and it looks like our logistics
department was late to the party.
1235
01:02:16,108 --> 01:02:17,942
Eve Schwarz, Miracore.
Here it is.
1236
01:02:18,025 --> 01:02:19,525
They've booked a freight company
that I've never used before,
1237
01:02:19,608 --> 01:02:20,858
so that's why I'm anxious.
1238
01:02:20,942 --> 01:02:23,150
Lime green is the color
and, uh...
1239
01:02:23,233 --> 01:02:24,942
[Katie] So you're anxious
about the freight company?
1240
01:02:25,025 --> 01:02:26,733
It's gonna be
green arrows pointing...
1241
01:02:26,817 --> 01:02:28,150
So if it's okay with you,
1242
01:02:28,233 --> 01:02:29,858
I know the Harrods
security system
1243
01:02:29,942 --> 01:02:31,775
and I'd like to run the
checks on the driver myself.
1244
01:02:31,858 --> 01:02:33,442
Oh, no, no, that's Imran's job.
That's...
1245
01:02:33,525 --> 01:02:35,150
Do you remember Imran, Linda?
1246
01:02:35,233 --> 01:02:36,567
I love Imran...
1247
01:02:36,650 --> 01:02:37,650
Imran is now head
of Events security.
1248
01:02:37,733 --> 01:02:39,150
He's Michael's boss.
1249
01:02:39,233 --> 01:02:40,275
You got any questions.
I can handle everything.
1250
01:02:40,358 --> 01:02:41,858
Let me text him now.
1251
01:02:41,942 --> 01:02:42,817
Don't, I'm gonna be the one
with the arrows. So...
1252
01:02:42,900 --> 01:02:43,817
[knock on door]
1253
01:02:43,900 --> 01:02:44,900
[door opens]
1254
01:02:45,942 --> 01:02:47,233
Okay. Done.
1255
01:02:47,317 --> 01:02:48,483
Tomorrow, I'll run you
through the system myself
1256
01:02:48,567 --> 01:02:49,775
and then get you
into the store.
1257
01:02:49,858 --> 01:02:51,025
After that,
what can go wrong?
1258
01:02:51,108 --> 01:02:53,483
Hey, great. Thanks.
1259
01:02:53,567 --> 01:02:55,650
I really appreciate
you doing this for me.
1260
01:02:58,275 --> 01:03:01,025
- What's the matter?
- I don't know.
1261
01:03:01,108 --> 01:03:02,733
Days are passing quickly.
1262
01:03:04,608 --> 01:03:05,817
When I woke up this morning,
1263
01:03:05,900 --> 01:03:08,650
it really hit me
for the first time.
1264
01:03:08,733 --> 01:03:11,067
The reality of what's
happening hit me.
1265
01:03:12,567 --> 01:03:14,608
The lockdown
will eventually end.
1266
01:03:15,692 --> 01:03:16,692
Then...
1267
01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:20,442
the love of my life
will be gone.
1268
01:03:22,775 --> 01:03:26,025
Paxton, you will move on
from this. You will heal.
1269
01:03:26,108 --> 01:03:29,067
There'll be a huge hole
in my life.
1270
01:03:29,150 --> 01:03:32,733
You'll change and grow.
And...
1271
01:03:34,442 --> 01:03:36,858
Eventually you'll...
1272
01:03:36,942 --> 01:03:38,108
you'll meet someone else.
1273
01:03:44,108 --> 01:03:46,358
You were talking about
the bike, weren't you?
1274
01:03:46,942 --> 01:03:48,192
Yeah. Why?
1275
01:03:50,067 --> 01:03:54,525
[chuckles] The bike is one
of the loves of my life.
1276
01:03:54,608 --> 01:03:55,775
And I am one of the holes?
1277
01:03:55,858 --> 01:03:57,442
Obviously you're
the biggest hole.
1278
01:03:57,525 --> 01:03:58,567
Oh, why, thank you.
1279
01:03:58,650 --> 01:04:00,442
[Paxton laughs]
1280
01:04:00,525 --> 01:04:02,900
I was gonna take
the bike out today.
1281
01:04:02,983 --> 01:04:06,108
The streets
are completely deserted.
1282
01:04:06,192 --> 01:04:08,692
I was gonna call it
"Lockdown-one-last-ride."
1283
01:04:09,442 --> 01:04:10,942
I thought maybe...
1284
01:04:12,108 --> 01:04:14,525
Oh, no, I can't
go with you, Paxton.
1285
01:04:14,608 --> 01:04:16,358
No. I have
an important meeting.
1286
01:04:20,983 --> 01:04:23,525
An open road
and a broken heart.
1287
01:04:25,317 --> 01:04:26,733
Don't kill yourself.
1288
01:04:32,233 --> 01:04:33,942
- Linda!
- Michael.
1289
01:04:34,733 --> 01:04:36,775
How are you coping?
1290
01:04:36,858 --> 01:04:38,442
You know, it's been
quite difficult.
1291
01:04:38,525 --> 01:04:40,692
- [laughs] I can imagine.
- Mmm.
1292
01:04:40,775 --> 01:04:42,650
- [motorbike engine starts]
- You know, I'm locked up on a mountaintop
1293
01:04:42,733 --> 01:04:44,942
with only eagles and bears
and my family for company.
1294
01:04:45,025 --> 01:04:46,817
[Linda whispers]
Please don't kill yourself.
1295
01:04:46,900 --> 01:04:48,317
What?
1296
01:04:48,400 --> 01:04:50,900
I said it must be nice
to have time to yourself.
1297
01:04:50,983 --> 01:04:53,942
Anyway, before we get on to
the exciting business of you
1298
01:04:54,025 --> 01:04:56,192
and your big decision
to come home to New York,
1299
01:04:56,275 --> 01:04:59,483
the good news is that we have found
a buyer for the Harris Diamond.
1300
01:04:59,567 --> 01:05:01,442
Uh, actually, I haven't decided
to come home to New York.
1301
01:05:01,525 --> 01:05:04,567
The buyer saw the diamond
on the virtual presentation
1302
01:05:04,650 --> 01:05:06,900
that you put together
ahead of the store takeover.
1303
01:05:06,983 --> 01:05:08,817
That's great. Who is it?
1304
01:05:08,900 --> 01:05:11,817
[laughs]
In our new world, Linda,
1305
01:05:11,900 --> 01:05:13,442
one does not ask who.
He's anonymous.
1306
01:05:13,525 --> 01:05:15,650
But I can tell you this.
He's, um...
1307
01:05:15,733 --> 01:05:18,192
A very unpleasant member
of a very unpleasant family
1308
01:05:18,275 --> 01:05:22,525
who run a very unpleasant
country in a very unpleasant way.
1309
01:05:22,608 --> 01:05:23,900
Oh.
1310
01:05:23,983 --> 01:05:26,025
He is facilitating Miracore
in his country
1311
01:05:26,108 --> 01:05:28,817
and so I've brokered the purchase
of the diamond personally.
1312
01:05:28,900 --> 01:05:31,650
Harrods themselves will
have nothing to do with him,
1313
01:05:31,733 --> 01:05:34,650
so I have acted
as go-between.
1314
01:05:35,775 --> 01:05:37,525
Hurray for us, no?
1315
01:05:37,608 --> 01:05:39,233
Yes, hurray for us.
1316
01:05:39,317 --> 01:05:42,233
Uh, will he be wanting to
pick up the diamond in person?
1317
01:05:42,317 --> 01:05:45,775
He is not allowed into the UK.
Something to do with, um...
1318
01:05:45,858 --> 01:05:48,525
Money laundering?
Human rights abuses?
1319
01:05:48,608 --> 01:05:51,442
Anyway,
the big question, Linda,
1320
01:05:51,525 --> 01:05:54,733
the issue at hand here
is the future of Linda.
1321
01:05:54,817 --> 01:05:56,525
When will you
be coming home?
1322
01:05:57,317 --> 01:05:58,817
Um...
1323
01:05:58,900 --> 01:06:01,317
Well, I've decided to leave
my decision about New York
1324
01:06:01,400 --> 01:06:03,483
until after lockdown
is lifted.
1325
01:06:03,567 --> 01:06:07,442
- Okay.
- I have lots of ties in London.
1326
01:06:07,525 --> 01:06:09,650
Uh-huh. I was told
that you're single.
1327
01:06:12,108 --> 01:06:13,608
[chuckles]
1328
01:06:13,692 --> 01:06:17,400
Actually, that was never
true, but actually now it is.
1329
01:06:17,483 --> 01:06:21,525
The fact that you are single is one of the
reasons I want you to come to New York.
1330
01:06:21,608 --> 01:06:23,692
I'm planning to get to know
more about you.
1331
01:06:23,775 --> 01:06:24,858
You...
1332
01:06:24,942 --> 01:06:26,400
You fascinate me, Linda.
1333
01:06:26,483 --> 01:06:28,442
So tough on the outside,
1334
01:06:29,108 --> 01:06:30,317
but inside,
1335
01:06:31,483 --> 01:06:32,692
are you tough?
1336
01:06:35,817 --> 01:06:37,983
Do you remember
when you came to Paris?
1337
01:06:38,067 --> 01:06:39,733
That evening,
after the meeting,
1338
01:06:39,817 --> 01:06:41,567
I was going to take you
out to dinner.
1339
01:06:41,650 --> 01:06:45,858
I was actually going to try
to seduce you that night.
1340
01:06:45,942 --> 01:06:50,150
Well, I can only speculate what kind
of evening that might have been.
1341
01:06:50,233 --> 01:06:54,233
But I suspect it would have
involved broken glass.
1342
01:06:54,317 --> 01:06:56,317
Anyway, uh, should I
send the diamond
1343
01:06:56,400 --> 01:06:58,150
to this probable
mass murderer's home
1344
01:06:58,233 --> 01:07:01,317
or should I send it straight
to his torture chamber?
1345
01:07:01,900 --> 01:07:03,192
What?
1346
01:07:03,275 --> 01:07:04,900
Where would you like me
to send the diamond?
1347
01:07:06,025 --> 01:07:08,067
Ah, send it to New York.
1348
01:07:08,150 --> 01:07:10,942
Um, because of COVID,
it will be couriered directly
1349
01:07:11,025 --> 01:07:13,442
to a safe vault
in Wall Street.
1350
01:07:13,525 --> 01:07:15,567
There'll be no one
to check it there,
1351
01:07:15,650 --> 01:07:20,108
so please make sure that the
verification papers are in the box.
1352
01:07:20,192 --> 01:07:22,150
Got that?
1353
01:07:22,233 --> 01:07:25,108
- Um...
- For many of our new wave of clients,
1354
01:07:25,192 --> 01:07:28,275
the act of acquisition
is an end in itself.
1355
01:07:28,358 --> 01:07:30,650
Okay. See you in New York, Linda.
Take care.
1356
01:07:30,733 --> 01:07:31,858
Well, I...
1357
01:07:31,942 --> 01:07:33,525
[call ends]
1358
01:07:37,733 --> 01:07:39,400
♪ Stand and Deliver ♪
1359
01:07:40,858 --> 01:07:42,275
♪ I'm the dandy highwayman ♪
1360
01:07:42,358 --> 01:07:43,942
♪ Who you're too scared
To mention ♪
1361
01:07:44,025 --> 01:07:45,817
♪ I spend my cash
On looking flash ♪
1362
01:07:45,900 --> 01:07:47,817
♪ And grabbing
your attention ♪
1363
01:07:47,900 --> 01:07:50,775
♪ The devil take your stereo
And your record collection ♪
1364
01:07:50,858 --> 01:07:52,525
♪ The way you look
You'll qualify ♪
1365
01:07:52,608 --> 01:07:54,275
♪ For next year's
Old age pension ♪
1366
01:07:54,358 --> 01:07:59,525
♪ Stand and deliver
Your money or your life ♪
1367
01:08:01,108 --> 01:08:07,108
♪ Try and use a mirror
No bullet or a knife ♪
1368
01:08:07,192 --> 01:08:08,567
[siren blaring]
1369
01:08:08,650 --> 01:08:10,233
[Linda screams]
1370
01:08:11,442 --> 01:08:13,942
♪ No bullet or a knife ♪
1371
01:08:15,692 --> 01:08:17,150
[Linda]
Don't be ridiculous, Linda.
1372
01:08:17,233 --> 01:08:18,483
[panting]
1373
01:08:18,567 --> 01:08:20,192
[reporter on TV]
A shortage of medical masks,
1374
01:08:20,275 --> 01:08:22,275
people are making their own
from old clothing.
1375
01:08:22,358 --> 01:08:24,983
But the WHO said it doesn't
know whether homemade masks...
1376
01:08:25,067 --> 01:08:26,358
[Linda] Hey.
1377
01:08:26,442 --> 01:08:27,483
- Where'd you go?
- [Paxton exhales]
1378
01:08:27,567 --> 01:08:28,650
Peckham Rye.
1379
01:08:28,733 --> 01:08:31,150
- Why?
- I don't know.
1380
01:08:31,233 --> 01:08:32,733
What do you mean,
you don't know?
1381
01:08:32,817 --> 01:08:34,192
I was just driving
really, really fast, [laughs]
1382
01:08:34,275 --> 01:08:36,442
because I was being chased
by the police.
1383
01:08:36,525 --> 01:08:38,692
- What?
- I was playing a new lockdown game.
1384
01:08:39,858 --> 01:08:41,650
Green for stop,
red for go.
1385
01:08:41,733 --> 01:08:42,817
Fuck!
1386
01:08:42,900 --> 01:08:44,108
Did they get
your license number?
1387
01:08:44,192 --> 01:08:45,817
No, I'm too fast for 'em.
1388
01:08:45,900 --> 01:08:48,067
I'm a streak of light on an
empty road in a deserted city.
1389
01:08:48,150 --> 01:08:49,983
I'm the last man alive.
1390
01:08:50,067 --> 01:08:53,067
I let the road direct me and I
achieved that moment of transcendence
1391
01:08:53,150 --> 01:08:55,233
where the bike becomes
part of your body.
1392
01:08:55,317 --> 01:08:58,983
I found myself in South London on some
sort of urban farm with a petting zoo
1393
01:08:59,067 --> 01:09:00,692
and I hid among the goats.
1394
01:09:00,775 --> 01:09:03,025
Remember the goat was my totem
animal when we were pagans.
1395
01:09:03,108 --> 01:09:07,525
I sat with the goats and then resumed my
journey as the police cars drove past.
1396
01:09:07,608 --> 01:09:09,192
I was in Peckham.
1397
01:09:09,275 --> 01:09:10,608
I bought you cigarettes.
1398
01:09:10,692 --> 01:09:12,358
And I had one myself.
1399
01:09:12,442 --> 01:09:15,067
My first real, real one
in ten years.
1400
01:09:15,150 --> 01:09:18,525
And you were right,
tobacco tastes like youth!
1401
01:09:18,608 --> 01:09:20,858
And real is real,
and real tobacco is me really,
1402
01:09:20,942 --> 01:09:22,275
and I want another one
right now
1403
01:09:22,358 --> 01:09:23,858
and I'm gonna have one.
1404
01:09:23,942 --> 01:09:25,525
[breathes heavily]
1405
01:09:26,442 --> 01:09:28,317
[indistinct talking on TV]
1406
01:09:37,525 --> 01:09:40,650
You have a look in your eyes
I haven't seen in a long time.
1407
01:09:40,733 --> 01:09:42,275
I don't mean
to frighten you.
1408
01:09:43,067 --> 01:09:44,317
I'm not frightened.
1409
01:09:46,025 --> 01:09:49,900
Remember I told you about the
glass horse and jockey in Paris?
1410
01:09:49,983 --> 01:09:53,733
No, I'm still with the goats.
They had blue eyes.
1411
01:09:53,817 --> 01:09:55,858
I held the horse and jockey
by the jockey
1412
01:09:55,942 --> 01:09:58,233
and swung it around and...
1413
01:09:58,317 --> 01:10:00,317
And I remembered how it felt
to be a rider
1414
01:10:00,400 --> 01:10:03,650
and to feel like you're a part
of the thing that you are riding.
1415
01:10:03,733 --> 01:10:05,317
It's a sexual feeling.
1416
01:10:06,358 --> 01:10:07,567
Yeah, it is.
1417
01:10:07,650 --> 01:10:10,858
[exhales] I now wish
I'd come with you.
1418
01:10:11,483 --> 01:10:12,775
Really?
1419
01:10:13,400 --> 01:10:15,275
Paxton,
1420
01:10:15,358 --> 01:10:18,900
for a long time,
I've known that our relationship was over.
1421
01:10:18,983 --> 01:10:22,192
And for a long time, the only unbroken
thread between us has been sex.
1422
01:10:23,483 --> 01:10:24,775
Go on.
1423
01:10:24,858 --> 01:10:27,567
I'm finding this moment
difficult because...
1424
01:10:27,650 --> 01:10:29,400
I made a vow
this wouldn't happen,
1425
01:10:29,483 --> 01:10:32,358
so could you just
take the leather jacket off
1426
01:10:32,442 --> 01:10:34,108
and go hold a tea towel
or something?
1427
01:10:34,192 --> 01:10:36,358
- Hold a tea towel?
- Or buy some milk, it would help me.
1428
01:10:36,442 --> 01:10:39,275
- We have milk.
- Or bake bread. That would definitely kill the moment.
1429
01:10:39,358 --> 01:10:41,608
I just want to get
on my bike and ride
1430
01:10:41,692 --> 01:10:43,067
and fuck the world.
1431
01:10:46,150 --> 01:10:48,817
Okay, Paxton,
here it is.
1432
01:10:50,400 --> 01:10:52,275
Probably as a result
of lockdown,
1433
01:10:52,358 --> 01:10:54,775
you have a mad urge to ride your
motorbike through red lights.
1434
01:10:54,858 --> 01:10:56,692
And as of two hours ago,
I have a mad urge
1435
01:10:56,775 --> 01:10:58,317
to steal a diamond
worth three million pounds
1436
01:10:58,400 --> 01:10:59,650
from a mass murderer
1437
01:10:59,733 --> 01:11:00,942
and quit my job
and become an artist.
1438
01:11:01,025 --> 01:11:02,150
[snickers] What?
1439
01:11:02,233 --> 01:11:03,900
But I think
the most practical thing
1440
01:11:03,983 --> 01:11:05,608
we can do to get this
madness out of our system
1441
01:11:05,692 --> 01:11:08,442
is that I break my vow and
we go upstairs right now
1442
01:11:08,525 --> 01:11:10,025
and have sex.
1443
01:11:10,108 --> 01:11:12,067
"Lockdown-one-last-ride."
1444
01:11:13,900 --> 01:11:15,983
Goats, now this.
1445
01:11:16,067 --> 01:11:17,775
What a fucking day.
1446
01:11:19,108 --> 01:11:21,233
[classical music playing]
1447
01:11:26,483 --> 01:11:29,858
Hi. Yeah, she's, uh, she's just changing.
[chuckles]
1448
01:11:30,650 --> 01:11:32,233
Oh, by the way,
1449
01:11:32,317 --> 01:11:34,483
you ever heard of a poet
called Edgar Allan Poe?
1450
01:11:34,567 --> 01:11:36,608
- What?
- Yeah, never mind.
1451
01:11:36,692 --> 01:11:38,483
All right. One second.
1452
01:11:38,567 --> 01:11:40,025
[man on radio] You're listening
to Drive Time with Dominic.
1453
01:11:40,108 --> 01:11:42,275
And this is
George Frideric Handel.
1454
01:11:42,358 --> 01:11:44,025
[classical music playing]
1455
01:11:56,233 --> 01:11:59,692
[automated voice on phone] Please hang up
or press the hash key for more options.
1456
01:11:59,775 --> 01:12:02,733
Uh, Linda, I'm just calling
to say that
1457
01:12:02,817 --> 01:12:04,525
I know this afternoon
didn't mean anything,
1458
01:12:04,608 --> 01:12:09,108
but I want you to know that
it would have felt like, uh...
1459
01:12:10,067 --> 01:12:11,358
like South Dakota
1460
01:12:11,442 --> 01:12:13,150
that afternoon
when it rained.
1461
01:12:14,275 --> 01:12:15,983
And also, I have
this bizarre memory
1462
01:12:16,067 --> 01:12:18,567
that just before we strayed
from the path of righteousness,
1463
01:12:18,650 --> 01:12:20,775
you said something
about stealing a diamond.
1464
01:12:20,858 --> 01:12:22,525
[Paxton over phone] ...you said
something about stealing a diamond.
1465
01:12:23,400 --> 01:12:25,067
Did I imagine that?
1466
01:12:25,150 --> 01:12:27,733
- [Linda] Oh, God!
- [woman speaks indistinctly over phone]
1467
01:12:27,817 --> 01:12:29,025
Thank you.
1468
01:12:32,983 --> 01:12:36,400
No, Grandma, I am not
seriously considering it.
1469
01:12:42,942 --> 01:12:44,692
[alarm ringing]
1470
01:12:46,483 --> 01:12:47,608
Fuck.
1471
01:12:53,983 --> 01:12:55,900
[alarm ringing]
1472
01:12:59,817 --> 01:13:03,483
[reporter on TV] This is where the
patients usually recover post-surgery.
1473
01:13:03,567 --> 01:13:07,942
But now, it's needed for COVID-19
overflow from intensive care.
1474
01:13:08,025 --> 01:13:11,525
Hospitals are having to adapt
their spaces and practices
1475
01:13:11,608 --> 01:13:13,858
to be able to deal
with Coronavirus.
1476
01:13:13,942 --> 01:13:16,067
[nurse on TV] I've been a
nurse in ICU for 18 years
1477
01:13:16,150 --> 01:13:17,858
- and I've never seen...
- [TV shuts off]
1478
01:13:26,025 --> 01:13:27,233
All right.
1479
01:13:28,108 --> 01:13:30,942
Big Saturday. Harrods.
1480
01:13:33,108 --> 01:13:35,067
The grand deception.
1481
01:13:35,150 --> 01:13:37,483
You have to tell me exactly
what it is we have to do.
1482
01:13:38,858 --> 01:13:39,983
Paxton...
1483
01:13:41,192 --> 01:13:42,442
[grunts softly]
1484
01:13:42,525 --> 01:13:44,067
Sit down. Wait there.
1485
01:13:48,233 --> 01:13:51,483
This is just us organizing what
it is that we're gonna do, okay?
1486
01:13:51,567 --> 01:13:53,067
It's nothing else.
1487
01:13:53,150 --> 01:13:54,692
Why, what else
would it be?
1488
01:13:54,775 --> 01:13:56,067
Nothing. Why do you ask?
1489
01:13:57,358 --> 01:13:58,817
Are you okay?
1490
01:13:58,900 --> 01:14:02,942
Me? I am okay.
I am intensely okay and normal.
1491
01:14:03,025 --> 01:14:04,775
Okay. Background.
1492
01:14:04,858 --> 01:14:10,317
Harrods. The top part
is the public area.
1493
01:14:10,400 --> 01:14:13,817
But below ground,
there are seven floors.
1494
01:14:13,900 --> 01:14:15,733
Floors where merchandise
is stored
1495
01:14:15,817 --> 01:14:17,067
and lots of tunnels
1496
01:14:17,150 --> 01:14:19,567
where expensive items
such as jewelry
1497
01:14:19,650 --> 01:14:21,317
are transported
to secure elevators.
1498
01:14:21,400 --> 01:14:22,983
All grown up
and glamorous above
1499
01:14:23,067 --> 01:14:25,192
and efficient
and scary below.
1500
01:14:25,275 --> 01:14:27,358
Security at Harrods
is unbelievably tight,
1501
01:14:27,442 --> 01:14:28,650
it would be impossible
to get inside
1502
01:14:28,733 --> 01:14:30,650
to actually
steal something.
1503
01:14:30,733 --> 01:14:31,900
Steal?
1504
01:14:31,983 --> 01:14:34,442
Who's talking about
stealing anything?
1505
01:14:34,525 --> 01:14:36,567
Everything is normal.
Paxton, stop being weird.
1506
01:14:36,650 --> 01:14:39,358
It's not me being weird.
1507
01:14:39,442 --> 01:14:41,483
I mean, you clearly appear
to have a hidden agenda,
1508
01:14:41,567 --> 01:14:43,692
which is not really that hidden,
but I don't know what it is.
1509
01:14:43,775 --> 01:14:46,942
Also, you've got
a smudge above your eye.
1510
01:14:47,025 --> 01:14:49,692
Did you get my message
on your phone last night?
1511
01:14:49,775 --> 01:14:51,483
About South Dakota?
1512
01:14:52,317 --> 01:14:53,692
And about a diamond.
1513
01:14:53,775 --> 01:14:56,692
Paxton, what is
the matter with you?
1514
01:14:56,775 --> 01:14:58,858
- There's nothing the matter with me.
- Seriously?
1515
01:14:58,942 --> 01:15:02,858
Yesterday, you were talking
about stealing a diamond.
1516
01:15:02,942 --> 01:15:04,942
You were,
I'm not imagining it.
1517
01:15:05,025 --> 01:15:07,900
And today, you are drawing
Harrods like it's, uh,
1518
01:15:07,983 --> 01:15:10,567
some kind of secret plan
in a secret heist movie.
1519
01:15:10,650 --> 01:15:14,817
How can you draw a rectangle like
you're in a secret plan? I don't...
1520
01:15:14,900 --> 01:15:16,400
Do you have
a secret plan?
1521
01:15:17,275 --> 01:15:19,692
You know... [chuckles]
1522
01:15:19,775 --> 01:15:21,567
I saw my grandmother's
face yesterday.
1523
01:15:21,650 --> 01:15:24,233
I told her, "It's okay,
Grandma, I am fine.
1524
01:15:24,317 --> 01:15:26,233
I'm not going to do
anything stupid."
1525
01:15:26,317 --> 01:15:28,900
You said the diamond
is called a Harris Diamond.
1526
01:15:28,983 --> 01:15:31,400
Oh, Paxton, come on.
1527
01:15:31,483 --> 01:15:33,608
It's Saturday.
It's morning.
1528
01:15:33,692 --> 01:15:38,650
All the weird 4:00 a.m. fantasies and
options have gone away as they always do.
1529
01:15:38,733 --> 01:15:40,650
Tell me about
the diamond.
1530
01:15:43,358 --> 01:15:45,900
There are
two Harris Diamonds.
1531
01:15:45,983 --> 01:15:49,650
- What?
- There are two Harris Diamonds, okay. God!
1532
01:15:49,733 --> 01:15:51,942
- Why are there two?
- [exhales deeply]
1533
01:15:52,025 --> 01:15:54,817
Do you think I slept at all
last night, Paxton?
1534
01:15:54,900 --> 01:15:57,025
Well actually, no,
I didn't.
1535
01:15:57,108 --> 01:15:58,942
And what was it
that kept you awake?
1536
01:16:00,983 --> 01:16:03,858
Harris Diamond one,
Harris Diamond two.
1537
01:16:03,942 --> 01:16:09,108
One is real,
the other is fake.
1538
01:16:09,192 --> 01:16:11,275
Whenever a diamond of this
value is exhibited in store,
1539
01:16:11,358 --> 01:16:12,525
they use a replica
of the real thing
1540
01:16:12,608 --> 01:16:14,108
to put
into the public area.
1541
01:16:14,192 --> 01:16:16,733
The actual diamond is
kept safe in the vaults.
1542
01:16:16,817 --> 01:16:19,400
Currently, the replica
1543
01:16:19,483 --> 01:16:22,067
is on display here
on the ground floor.
1544
01:16:22,150 --> 01:16:27,858
But your real Harris Diamond
is here in the vaults.
1545
01:16:27,942 --> 01:16:29,442
Tonight,
at exactly 7:00 p.m.,
1546
01:16:29,525 --> 01:16:30,817
you and I will be escorted
to the vaults by security
1547
01:16:30,900 --> 01:16:32,567
to collect
the real Harris Diamond.
1548
01:16:32,650 --> 01:16:34,650
We will then go
up the ground floor
1549
01:16:34,733 --> 01:16:37,150
in a secure elevator
where we add the diamond
1550
01:16:37,233 --> 01:16:39,025
to the rest of the Eve
Schwarz collection.
1551
01:16:39,108 --> 01:16:41,275
Then, right there at 7:30 p.m.,
we will have the real diamond
1552
01:16:41,358 --> 01:16:43,775
and the very good replica
diamond, side by side,
1553
01:16:43,858 --> 01:16:45,858
next to each other,
almost indistinguishable.
1554
01:16:45,942 --> 01:16:47,608
And because
of COVID restrictions,
1555
01:16:47,692 --> 01:16:51,775
the only people that will
be there are you and me.
1556
01:16:51,858 --> 01:16:55,150
So, then we put the real
diamond into a secure box
1557
01:16:55,233 --> 01:16:56,983
and send it to New York,
and we take the glass replica
1558
01:16:57,067 --> 01:16:58,858
and I put it in my purse,
we take it away for disposal,
1559
01:16:58,942 --> 01:17:00,567
and that is what we are going
to fucking do,
1560
01:17:00,650 --> 01:17:03,650
exactly that and nothing else.
Grandma, I love you.
1561
01:17:06,067 --> 01:17:07,650
May I ask
a very obvious question?
1562
01:17:07,733 --> 01:17:09,150
No, you may not.
1563
01:17:09,233 --> 01:17:12,067
What would happen if we sent
the replica to New York
1564
01:17:12,150 --> 01:17:13,483
and kept the real thing?
1565
01:17:13,567 --> 01:17:15,567
I'm assuming that as soon
as it got to New York,
1566
01:17:15,650 --> 01:17:18,317
someone would realize
that it was fake.
1567
01:17:18,400 --> 01:17:20,608
No, they wouldn't.
1568
01:17:20,692 --> 01:17:23,317
That is why
I couldn't sleep.
1569
01:17:23,400 --> 01:17:25,567
Whichever one we send
to New York,
1570
01:17:25,650 --> 01:17:27,733
it will go into a secure
vault in Wall Street
1571
01:17:27,817 --> 01:17:29,733
and won't even be looked at
by another human being
1572
01:17:29,817 --> 01:17:32,442
for 20, 50, 100 years.
1573
01:17:32,525 --> 01:17:33,775
Holy fuck.
1574
01:17:35,775 --> 01:17:39,358
Three million pounds,
tax free.
1575
01:17:40,150 --> 01:17:41,233
No consequences.
1576
01:17:41,317 --> 01:17:42,525
One for me, one for you,
one for the NHS.
1577
01:17:42,608 --> 01:17:43,692
You have thought
about this.
1578
01:17:43,775 --> 01:17:46,858
You know,
I need to go meditate.
1579
01:17:46,942 --> 01:17:49,025
Are you sure they
won't check it in New York?
1580
01:17:49,108 --> 01:17:50,317
Shut up.
I need to meditate.
1581
01:17:50,400 --> 01:17:51,817
What were you going to say?
1582
01:17:53,067 --> 01:17:54,817
The man who bought
the diamond is bad.
1583
01:17:54,900 --> 01:17:56,775
He's really bad,
and you and I are good.
1584
01:17:56,858 --> 01:17:59,067
And the NHS is good.
And good is better than bad.
1585
01:17:59,150 --> 01:18:00,525
When I explained
all that to Grandma,
1586
01:18:00,608 --> 01:18:01,983
even she said,
"Well, yeah, that's true."
1587
01:18:02,067 --> 01:18:04,525
And she was a Calvinist,
straight as a rod.
1588
01:18:04,608 --> 01:18:07,775
Unlike me, who is weak
in the face of temptation.
1589
01:18:07,858 --> 01:18:08,942
[inhales deeply]
1590
01:18:11,150 --> 01:18:12,858
Live wild or die, Linda.
1591
01:18:12,942 --> 01:18:15,858
Paxton, you're forgetting
something very important, okay?
1592
01:18:15,942 --> 01:18:17,983
Assuming that
we do this thing,
1593
01:18:18,067 --> 01:18:20,067
which we definitely won't,
1594
01:18:20,150 --> 01:18:22,400
how would two ordinary people
like you and me
1595
01:18:22,483 --> 01:18:26,817
find a way to sell a three
million pounds stolen diamond?
1596
01:18:26,900 --> 01:18:28,483
Okay, that was it.
That was my last attempt
1597
01:18:28,567 --> 01:18:30,067
to find a logical reason
why we shouldn't do this,
1598
01:18:30,150 --> 01:18:32,233
but you are going to say
"Archie Bruce," aren't you?
1599
01:18:32,317 --> 01:18:33,817
Yes, I am.
1600
01:18:34,692 --> 01:18:35,733
Archie Bruce.
1601
01:18:37,192 --> 01:18:40,275
Over the years,
I've kept up with the guys.
1602
01:18:40,358 --> 01:18:41,567
I mean, Archie Bruce,
1603
01:18:41,650 --> 01:18:43,608
he's graduated
from stealing motorcycles
1604
01:18:43,692 --> 01:18:46,108
to stealing vintage cars
1605
01:18:46,192 --> 01:18:48,108
and fine art and jewelry.
1606
01:18:48,192 --> 01:18:51,275
I mean, he'd have Mr. Harris
in a penthouse in Moscow
1607
01:18:51,358 --> 01:18:53,108
before the banging
of the next saucepans.
1608
01:18:53,192 --> 01:18:54,775
And he'd do a preferential
deal with you,
1609
01:18:54,858 --> 01:18:57,025
because you stepped in
one night and saved his life
1610
01:18:57,108 --> 01:18:59,983
at a roadhouse in Watford.
1611
01:19:00,067 --> 01:19:01,650
Circle of life,
something like that.
1612
01:19:02,192 --> 01:19:03,608
[sighs]
1613
01:19:03,692 --> 01:19:06,442
With Archie Bruce,
the nightmare began.
1614
01:19:06,525 --> 01:19:08,817
Maybe with Archie Bruce,
the nightmare ends.
1615
01:19:11,025 --> 01:19:15,608
So, what are we
going to do, Linda?
1616
01:19:19,067 --> 01:19:21,858
Okay, Paxton, here it is.
1617
01:19:24,108 --> 01:19:26,400
We decide tonight.
1618
01:19:26,483 --> 01:19:28,483
When we're there at Harrods
with the diamonds,
1619
01:19:28,567 --> 01:19:30,150
we're gonna know what's right
and what's wrong.
1620
01:19:30,233 --> 01:19:32,608
We'll decide in the moment.
1621
01:19:32,692 --> 01:19:34,108
Or let the moment decide.
1622
01:19:36,317 --> 01:19:37,400
What's the difference?
1623
01:19:37,483 --> 01:19:39,567
Fate versus free will.
1624
01:19:39,650 --> 01:19:41,400
Who controls our destiny?
1625
01:19:41,483 --> 01:19:42,775
Is everything
part of a plan
1626
01:19:42,858 --> 01:19:44,817
or do we fuck things up
for ourselves?
1627
01:19:46,442 --> 01:19:48,483
Tonight at 7:30,
we find out.
1628
01:19:50,900 --> 01:19:53,733
[cell phone ringing]
1629
01:19:57,567 --> 01:19:58,650
Hey, half-brother.
1630
01:20:00,275 --> 01:20:02,692
What, now?
You wanna Zoom?
1631
01:20:03,858 --> 01:20:05,775
All right,
give me a minute.
1632
01:20:11,650 --> 01:20:12,733
[video chimes]
1633
01:20:12,817 --> 01:20:16,608
Ah, Paxton,
how are you?
1634
01:20:16,692 --> 01:20:19,192
Actually, I am at a fork
in the road.
1635
01:20:19,275 --> 01:20:21,608
Really? Then perhaps
what I have to say
1636
01:20:21,692 --> 01:20:23,275
will have some bearing
on which fork you take,
1637
01:20:23,358 --> 01:20:24,983
because it is
sort of road related.
1638
01:20:25,067 --> 01:20:26,775
[David chuckles]
1639
01:20:26,858 --> 01:20:28,983
You see, Paxton,
the other day when you said
1640
01:20:29,067 --> 01:20:30,692
you want
to sell your motorcycle,
1641
01:20:30,775 --> 01:20:35,192
I thought, "Wait a minute.
Time out. Not so fast."
1642
01:20:35,275 --> 01:20:40,525
And then, after I cut the
call I thought about Mom.
1643
01:20:40,608 --> 01:20:41,983
Mum?
1644
01:20:42,067 --> 01:20:43,400
How she would feel
about you having to sell
1645
01:20:43,483 --> 01:20:44,858
your most
precious possession,
1646
01:20:44,942 --> 01:20:46,233
while at the same time,
over here
1647
01:20:46,317 --> 01:20:48,067
in the beautiful
Hudson Valley,
1648
01:20:48,150 --> 01:20:50,567
your brother, your half-brother
isn't having it so bad.
1649
01:20:50,650 --> 01:20:55,108
You know, when the cherry trees
in your orchard get a fungus,
1650
01:20:55,192 --> 01:20:57,817
it sucks,
but there are worse things.
1651
01:20:59,983 --> 01:21:01,400
Yeah, not for the cherry tree.
[chuckles]
1652
01:21:01,483 --> 01:21:02,733
Maybe worse for a cherry tree
1653
01:21:02,817 --> 01:21:04,275
is the steady tread
of George Washington
1654
01:21:04,358 --> 01:21:05,608
as he approaches
with an axe in his hand
1655
01:21:05,692 --> 01:21:07,567
and a head
full of good intentions.
1656
01:21:07,650 --> 01:21:10,483
Anyway, I wondered what Mom
would want me to do.
1657
01:21:10,567 --> 01:21:11,900
Well, remembering Mum,
1658
01:21:11,983 --> 01:21:13,567
I think she'd want you
to get to the point.
1659
01:21:15,483 --> 01:21:18,067
Okay, Paxton, here it is.
1660
01:21:19,567 --> 01:21:22,942
It is I who has bought
your precious motorcycle.
1661
01:21:23,025 --> 01:21:25,775
The purchaser
of your bike is me.
1662
01:21:25,858 --> 01:21:27,817
And I am
giving it back to you.
1663
01:21:27,900 --> 01:21:30,608
My gesture,
half-brother to half-brother.
1664
01:21:30,692 --> 01:21:33,692
Your bike is yours
once more.
1665
01:21:33,775 --> 01:21:35,358
Don't thank me, Paxton.
1666
01:21:35,442 --> 01:21:36,983
Please. No need.
1667
01:21:37,067 --> 01:21:40,067
All I ask, the only thing
I ask of you, Paxton,
1668
01:21:40,150 --> 01:21:43,275
is that you are kind to
yourself from now on.
1669
01:21:43,358 --> 01:21:44,983
That you learn from this.
1670
01:21:45,067 --> 01:21:46,608
That the world
does not hate you.
1671
01:21:46,692 --> 01:21:49,483
That, yes, sometimes fate
seems harsh and cruel,
1672
01:21:49,567 --> 01:21:51,692
but people really do
what good...
1673
01:21:51,775 --> 01:21:55,233
Hey, David,
it's Linda. Hi!
1674
01:21:55,317 --> 01:21:57,775
Uh, Linda, I thought I was
just speaking to Paxton.
1675
01:21:57,858 --> 01:21:59,942
Yes, I know. I heard, David,
your magnificent gesture,
1676
01:22:00,025 --> 01:22:01,775
and I just...
I couldn't stop myself,
1677
01:22:01,858 --> 01:22:03,567
I couldn't help myself.
I just had to jump on the call
1678
01:22:03,650 --> 01:22:05,817
and say,
"Oh, my God, David.
1679
01:22:05,900 --> 01:22:07,192
What kind
of a person are you?"
1680
01:22:07,275 --> 01:22:08,775
David bought
my fucking bike.
1681
01:22:08,858 --> 01:22:11,692
Yes, I heard. I heard,
and then I heard the sermon,
1682
01:22:11,775 --> 01:22:13,025
and I thought, "Wow!
1683
01:22:13,108 --> 01:22:15,150
Not only is he so generous
with his cash,
1684
01:22:15,233 --> 01:22:17,442
he is so free
with his wisdom."
1685
01:22:19,400 --> 01:22:21,025
- [David] Anyway, Paxton, there it is...
- No, no, no.
1686
01:22:21,108 --> 01:22:22,858
Don't let me interrupt
this meaningful moment.
1687
01:22:22,942 --> 01:22:24,317
What is it that
you were saying, David?
1688
01:22:24,400 --> 01:22:25,358
Something about fate
being harsh and...
1689
01:22:25,442 --> 01:22:26,942
- [chimes]
- ...cruel?
1690
01:22:30,900 --> 01:22:32,108
Hmm.
1691
01:22:37,233 --> 01:22:38,442
Why were you mad at him?
1692
01:22:38,525 --> 01:22:40,025
- [Linda] I wasn't mad.
- Yes, you were.
1693
01:22:41,525 --> 01:22:43,108
It was you.
1694
01:22:43,192 --> 01:22:43,983
[chuckles]
1695
01:22:44,067 --> 01:22:45,567
You bought my bike.
1696
01:22:45,650 --> 01:22:48,858
Paxton, don't be ridiculous.
You heard what David said.
1697
01:22:48,942 --> 01:22:51,150
David would never do
something like that,
1698
01:22:51,233 --> 01:22:52,525
but he would
take the credit.
1699
01:22:52,608 --> 01:22:54,192
Whereas you would do
something like that
1700
01:22:54,275 --> 01:22:56,483
and give the credit
to someone else.
1701
01:22:56,567 --> 01:22:58,275
You did it 'cause you
felt sorry for me.
1702
01:23:00,192 --> 01:23:02,775
Yes, I worried
about what would happen
1703
01:23:02,858 --> 01:23:04,900
if you lost everything.
1704
01:23:04,983 --> 01:23:07,233
Mainly because I didn't want
anything bad on my conscience.
1705
01:23:07,317 --> 01:23:09,942
Confession avalanche,
but also I...
1706
01:23:10,025 --> 01:23:12,192
I did it because
the bike represents us.
1707
01:23:12,275 --> 01:23:13,858
- And...
- No, no, no.
1708
01:23:13,942 --> 01:23:18,358
Pity is over here, all right,
and love is way over here.
1709
01:23:18,442 --> 01:23:20,025
Don't pretend
there is a bridge.
1710
01:23:22,275 --> 01:23:24,150
But would you still
feel pity for a man
1711
01:23:24,233 --> 01:23:26,067
who'd just stolen
a million pounds?
1712
01:23:28,567 --> 01:23:29,608
I'd be a millionaire,
1713
01:23:30,483 --> 01:23:32,567
and a bandido once again.
1714
01:23:34,317 --> 01:23:35,817
Maybe you'd change
your mind.
1715
01:23:37,150 --> 01:23:39,067
Maybe we'd ride off
into the sunset.
1716
01:23:39,983 --> 01:23:41,483
Paxton...
1717
01:23:41,567 --> 01:23:44,150
whatever we decide
to do tonight,
1718
01:23:44,233 --> 01:23:45,567
we will go
our separate ways.
1719
01:23:45,650 --> 01:23:48,400
The money would mean
that we're both free.
1720
01:23:51,650 --> 01:23:52,692
Well, I will factor that
1721
01:23:52,775 --> 01:23:54,983
into my decision-making
process.
1722
01:23:57,483 --> 01:23:58,817
Thanks for the bike.
1723
01:24:06,525 --> 01:24:08,067
[inhales deeply]
1724
01:24:09,442 --> 01:24:10,900
[chanting] Om...
1725
01:24:10,983 --> 01:24:12,942
[Paxton]
Ladies and gentlemen...
1726
01:24:13,983 --> 01:24:15,150
fellow inmates...
1727
01:24:16,525 --> 01:24:18,650
I have something for you
1728
01:24:18,733 --> 01:24:20,942
before I head off
on the number 27 bus
1729
01:24:21,025 --> 01:24:23,650
to meet my destiny.
1730
01:24:23,733 --> 01:24:26,192
It's a passage
from a poem
1731
01:24:27,108 --> 01:24:30,025
written by T.S. Eliot,
1732
01:24:30,108 --> 01:24:31,900
who I'm sure no one
has ever heard of either.
1733
01:24:34,108 --> 01:24:38,233
"She turns and looks a moment
in the glass,
1734
01:24:38,317 --> 01:24:42,275
hardly aware
of her departed lover.
1735
01:24:42,358 --> 01:24:46,400
Her brain allows one
half-formed thought to pass.
1736
01:24:47,733 --> 01:24:51,733
Well, now that's done,
and I'm glad it's over."
1737
01:24:56,233 --> 01:24:58,525
See you
in the moment, Linda.
1738
01:25:00,733 --> 01:25:02,858
[music playing]
1739
01:25:16,192 --> 01:25:18,483
[Paxton] This could be
the last bus I ever take.
1740
01:25:37,192 --> 01:25:39,275
Oh, I've decided
to go by myself. Thanks.
1741
01:25:39,358 --> 01:25:41,192
- [driver] No problem.
- Thank you.
1742
01:25:56,442 --> 01:25:57,983
[exhales]
1743
01:26:20,067 --> 01:26:25,400
[Martin] Do it, Paxton. Take the
opportunity that fate has given you.
1744
01:26:25,483 --> 01:26:26,942
[Paxon grunts]
1745
01:26:32,733 --> 01:26:34,817
[engine starts]
1746
01:27:23,192 --> 01:27:24,692
[siren wailing]
1747
01:28:59,067 --> 01:29:00,483
[sighs]
1748
01:29:03,400 --> 01:29:05,275
- Hi, stranger.
- [Charlotte] Oh, my God!
1749
01:29:05,358 --> 01:29:07,067
- [laughs]
- I want to hug you.
1750
01:29:07,150 --> 01:29:08,567
I can't hug you,
I can't hug you.
1751
01:29:08,650 --> 01:29:09,817
I hate this virus.
1752
01:29:09,900 --> 01:29:11,358
[blowing kisses]
I'm blowing you kisses.
1753
01:29:11,442 --> 01:29:12,858
- Oh, my God.
- [man] Hello, stranger.
1754
01:29:12,942 --> 01:29:15,025
- [Linda] Hey, oh...
- [chuckles]
1755
01:29:15,108 --> 01:29:16,650
[Charlotte] This place died
when you left.
1756
01:29:16,733 --> 01:29:18,275
[Linda] Oh, Charlotte,
I need to know the name
1757
01:29:18,358 --> 01:29:20,400
of your personal trainer
right now, seriously.
1758
01:29:20,483 --> 01:29:22,233
I actually lost weight
because of stress,
1759
01:29:22,317 --> 01:29:23,483
'cause I found out
my girlfriend
1760
01:29:23,567 --> 01:29:25,067
was stealing a load of money
from me.
1761
01:29:25,150 --> 01:29:26,025
- [Linda] What?
- Long story.
1762
01:29:26,108 --> 01:29:27,233
That's not for right now.
1763
01:29:27,317 --> 01:29:28,608
- Hi!
- Hi. [laughs]
1764
01:29:28,692 --> 01:29:33,025
Terry, yeah.
Terry, guess who's here?
1765
01:29:33,108 --> 01:29:35,025
Yeah, have a little look
at Cam 14.
1766
01:29:39,275 --> 01:29:41,025
[Terry] Oh, shit,
it's Linda.
1767
01:29:42,525 --> 01:29:44,275
So, Linda,
what are you doing here?
1768
01:29:44,358 --> 01:29:46,108
[Linda] Oh, I'm not
on the list, because I made
1769
01:29:46,192 --> 01:29:47,483
a special arrangement
with Imran,
1770
01:29:47,567 --> 01:29:48,858
so I just need a desk
for five minutes.
1771
01:29:48,942 --> 01:29:51,775
Or three minutes.
Charlotte, can I?
1772
01:29:51,858 --> 01:29:53,817
- Come through.
- [Linda] Okay. Oh!
1773
01:29:53,900 --> 01:29:55,650
I need to wait
for my, um, driver.
1774
01:29:55,733 --> 01:29:57,567
Oh, hang on.
Excuse me.
1775
01:29:59,358 --> 01:30:01,525
[whistles] Hi.
B2B Pro Freight Services?
1776
01:30:01,608 --> 01:30:02,817
[Paxton] Yeah.
1777
01:30:02,900 --> 01:30:03,983
[Linda] For the Eve Schwarz
collection?
1778
01:30:04,067 --> 01:30:05,358
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah?
1779
01:30:05,442 --> 01:30:07,775
Okay, just wait here
for one second. Okay.
1780
01:30:07,858 --> 01:30:11,567
[sighs] We couldn't get
our normal freight service.
1781
01:30:11,650 --> 01:30:13,150
[Charlotte]
World's gone mad.
1782
01:30:13,233 --> 01:30:14,483
I'm going to have to run a
hundred checks on this guy.
1783
01:30:14,567 --> 01:30:15,983
We'll just need
to see his ID.
1784
01:30:16,067 --> 01:30:17,858
And Imran said we do need
to check the driver's ID.
1785
01:30:20,233 --> 01:30:21,442
Of course.
1786
01:30:26,275 --> 01:30:27,983
[whistles] Yeah,
can I see your ID?
1787
01:30:34,233 --> 01:30:35,817
Thank you.
1788
01:30:35,900 --> 01:30:37,483
Oops. [chuckles]
1789
01:30:48,108 --> 01:30:49,317
Oh, my God, Charlotte.
1790
01:30:49,400 --> 01:30:51,650
I didn't tell you.
You of all people.
1791
01:30:51,733 --> 01:30:52,817
[Charlotte] What?
1792
01:30:52,900 --> 01:30:54,150
It's just
the most earth-shattering,
1793
01:30:54,233 --> 01:30:55,650
life-changing,
amazing news.
1794
01:30:55,733 --> 01:30:57,483
[whispering] I found someone.
I met someone.
1795
01:30:57,567 --> 01:30:59,275
- No.
- Yes.
1796
01:30:59,358 --> 01:31:00,775
Oh, my God. I thought you were
going to be single forever.
1797
01:31:00,858 --> 01:31:02,483
- Me, too!
- Dating app? Bumble?
1798
01:31:02,567 --> 01:31:04,817
- What's he like?
- [Linda] He's, uh...
1799
01:31:07,108 --> 01:31:08,525
He's a poet.
1800
01:31:08,608 --> 01:31:09,983
- Oh?
- Yeah.
1801
01:31:10,067 --> 01:31:11,567
[whispering] Yeah, he's like
a really wild poet.
1802
01:31:11,650 --> 01:31:12,942
Oh, my God,
that's so romantic.
1803
01:31:13,025 --> 01:31:14,400
Hmm, I know.
1804
01:31:14,483 --> 01:31:16,192
But listen, I've got a slot
in the vaults at 7:00.
1805
01:31:16,275 --> 01:31:18,358
- I gotta get this guy processed. Thank you.
- Mmm-hmm.
1806
01:31:18,442 --> 01:31:21,192
- Linda...
- Oh, life, life.
1807
01:31:21,275 --> 01:31:23,025
Right? You never know
what's coming down the line.
1808
01:31:23,108 --> 01:31:24,733
- Mmm-hmm.
- Okay.
1809
01:31:27,525 --> 01:31:28,942
[whistles] We're good.
1810
01:31:31,858 --> 01:31:33,525
[blows kiss]
Thank you, Mark.
1811
01:31:33,608 --> 01:31:35,150
[Mark]
Anything for you, Linda.
1812
01:31:37,275 --> 01:31:40,483
Okay, I'm going to
generate you a Harrods pass
1813
01:31:40,567 --> 01:31:42,650
that will give you access
to all areas.
1814
01:31:42,733 --> 01:31:46,233
- Date of birth.
- [Paxton] January 19th, 1809.
1815
01:31:46,317 --> 01:31:49,733
But I didn't have my first
poem published until 1827.
1816
01:31:50,733 --> 01:31:52,150
Okay, that's good.
That's good.
1817
01:31:52,233 --> 01:31:54,400
You're taking it lightly.
You're not panicking.
1818
01:31:54,483 --> 01:31:56,608
January 19th, 1980.
1819
01:31:56,692 --> 01:31:58,233
Height, six feet.
1820
01:31:58,317 --> 01:31:59,733
- Build...
- Medium athletic.
1821
01:31:59,817 --> 01:32:02,025
And inside, I am panicking.
1822
01:32:02,108 --> 01:32:04,900
You do realize that we've
both gone fucking insane.
1823
01:32:04,983 --> 01:32:07,108
We haven't done
anything yet.
1824
01:32:07,192 --> 01:32:10,733
Criminal convictions, none.
1825
01:32:10,817 --> 01:32:12,317
So, when does
the moment begin?
1826
01:32:12,400 --> 01:32:15,025
- [keyboard clacking]
- The moment when we decide.
1827
01:32:15,108 --> 01:32:17,150
In the CCTV control room,
1828
01:32:17,233 --> 01:32:19,900
there's a deaf man
who reads lips.
1829
01:32:19,983 --> 01:32:22,108
Shut up. Look here.
1830
01:32:22,942 --> 01:32:24,733
Why are you good at this?
1831
01:32:26,025 --> 01:32:27,608
[mouse clicking]
1832
01:32:28,317 --> 01:32:31,025
[printer whirring]
1833
01:32:32,858 --> 01:32:34,192
Oh, Linda.
1834
01:32:34,275 --> 01:32:36,108
I just need to get
the gentleman's name
1835
01:32:36,192 --> 01:32:38,108
in case of a fire, so...
1836
01:32:39,192 --> 01:32:41,192
- His name?
- [Mark] Mmm-hmm.
1837
01:32:41,275 --> 01:32:42,733
Edgar Allen Poe.
1838
01:32:45,942 --> 01:32:47,483
Uh, Edgar...
1839
01:32:48,192 --> 01:32:51,067
Edgar Allen Poe.
1840
01:32:51,150 --> 01:32:52,650
Great, thanks.
1841
01:32:55,025 --> 01:32:56,775
[Linda] This is the first time
Harrods has been closed
1842
01:32:56,858 --> 01:32:59,442
in a hundred years.
1843
01:32:59,525 --> 01:33:02,233
Everything has to get packed
up and put into boxes.
1844
01:33:02,317 --> 01:33:05,317
Pearls, purses,
fine art, fine jewelry.
1845
01:33:05,400 --> 01:33:06,317
Diamonds.
1846
01:33:06,400 --> 01:33:08,025
[Linda] Yeah. Diamonds.
1847
01:33:09,358 --> 01:33:11,150
[elevator dings]
1848
01:33:13,358 --> 01:33:14,983
Remember that game
we used to play
1849
01:33:15,067 --> 01:33:16,733
when we are alone
in an elevator,
1850
01:33:16,817 --> 01:33:18,317
we ask
each other questions,
1851
01:33:18,400 --> 01:33:19,942
and we are only allowed
to tell the absolute truth?
1852
01:33:21,442 --> 01:33:22,817
Shoot.
1853
01:33:22,900 --> 01:33:25,233
What went wrong
with you and me?
1854
01:33:27,442 --> 01:33:30,150
When I met you,
I wanted wild and you were wild.
1855
01:33:30,233 --> 01:33:34,817
And then, I stopped wanting
wild, and you stopped being wild.
1856
01:33:36,567 --> 01:33:38,275
- So, it should have worked.
- Yeah, but it didn't.
1857
01:33:38,358 --> 01:33:39,983
- Why not?
- I don't know.
1858
01:33:40,067 --> 01:33:43,650
[hesitates] That's the truth.
1859
01:33:43,733 --> 01:33:46,108
- [elevator dings]
- [automated voice] Doors opening.
1860
01:33:47,317 --> 01:33:49,483
- Are you hungry?
- Yeah.
1861
01:33:59,983 --> 01:34:01,733
[indistinct talking]
1862
01:34:04,192 --> 01:34:07,233
[classical music playing]
1863
01:34:11,775 --> 01:34:14,692
[Linda] We have an hour
until our slot in the vaults,
1864
01:34:14,775 --> 01:34:17,192
so what do you want
to eat, Paxton?
1865
01:34:17,275 --> 01:34:18,983
There is
literally everything.
1866
01:34:22,275 --> 01:34:24,108
With the store closing,
Harrods is gonna give
1867
01:34:24,192 --> 01:34:26,025
all of this food away
to a food bank.
1868
01:34:26,108 --> 01:34:27,983
[indistinct announcement on PA]
1869
01:34:31,067 --> 01:34:32,275
Fine.
1870
01:34:33,150 --> 01:34:34,733
Is there anybody watching?
1871
01:34:35,317 --> 01:34:36,233
Maybe.
1872
01:34:37,692 --> 01:34:38,983
Dream bigger.
1873
01:34:43,150 --> 01:34:44,775
Finest beluga caviar?
1874
01:34:56,858 --> 01:34:58,317
[Paxton]
So is this the moment?
1875
01:34:58,858 --> 01:35:00,483
[Linda] No.
1876
01:35:00,567 --> 01:35:03,817
No. We gotta get something clear
before we make up our mind.
1877
01:35:03,900 --> 01:35:06,067
This is a black Perigord
truffle from Italy.
1878
01:35:06,150 --> 01:35:08,442
It retails for £735.
1879
01:35:08,525 --> 01:35:10,067
- For a fucking mushroom?
- Okay.
1880
01:35:10,150 --> 01:35:11,858
Okay, that is what we need
to get clear in our minds.
1881
01:35:11,942 --> 01:35:13,733
What is the difference
between the cost of things,
1882
01:35:13,817 --> 01:35:15,400
and the value of things
to you and me?
1883
01:35:15,483 --> 01:35:16,775
So, I'm gonna
make a picnic.
1884
01:35:16,858 --> 01:35:17,942
A picnic which
under normal circumstances
1885
01:35:18,025 --> 01:35:20,192
would cost us about £5,000.
1886
01:35:48,692 --> 01:35:49,775
[elevator dings]
1887
01:35:49,858 --> 01:35:51,192
[automated voice]
Door's closing.
1888
01:35:51,275 --> 01:35:53,150
[Linda] My precious grandma
was a racist.
1889
01:35:53,233 --> 01:35:54,567
- Whoa.
- Yeah.
1890
01:35:54,650 --> 01:35:56,192
And I've just decided
to take her off
1891
01:35:56,275 --> 01:35:57,483
my in-head jury of people
1892
01:35:57,567 --> 01:35:59,192
who pass judgment
on what I do.
1893
01:36:01,483 --> 01:36:02,858
So, who else
is on the jury?
1894
01:36:04,233 --> 01:36:05,775
My dead mother,
God and you.
1895
01:36:06,567 --> 01:36:08,108
How come I'm still there?
1896
01:36:08,192 --> 01:36:09,692
- [elevator dings]
- [automated voice] Door's opening.
1897
01:36:09,775 --> 01:36:12,192
Doors are open,
I don't have to tell you.
1898
01:36:14,733 --> 01:36:17,067
I used to come in here
on my lunch break.
1899
01:36:23,067 --> 01:36:25,483
[Paxton] So which one of
those paintings do you want?
1900
01:36:25,567 --> 01:36:28,608
[Linda] Uh,
I don't want to own one.
1901
01:36:29,733 --> 01:36:31,525
You want to paint one.
1902
01:36:31,608 --> 01:36:34,317
[sighs]
I just want to paint.
1903
01:36:36,358 --> 01:36:38,150
So, this is the moment.
1904
01:36:38,233 --> 01:36:39,692
Oh, wait.
1905
01:36:39,775 --> 01:36:41,942
- Is the deaf guy looking?
- What?
1906
01:36:42,025 --> 01:36:44,733
Oh, I made that guy up
so you would stop talking.
1907
01:36:44,817 --> 01:36:46,192
Ah.
1908
01:36:46,275 --> 01:36:47,942
Think about it.
1909
01:36:48,025 --> 01:36:52,233
£100,000 a year for ten years.
£50,000 a year for 20 years.
1910
01:36:52,317 --> 01:36:54,108
- A million pounds.
- [Linda] Yeah.
1911
01:36:54,192 --> 01:36:55,400
You could paint.
1912
01:36:55,483 --> 01:36:57,108
You wouldn't even need
to sell anything.
1913
01:36:57,192 --> 01:37:00,692
- [elevator dings]
- [automated voice] Door's closing.
1914
01:37:00,775 --> 01:37:02,858
I never learned
to ride a bicycle.
1915
01:37:02,942 --> 01:37:03,900
- What?
- Yeah.
1916
01:37:03,983 --> 01:37:05,108
- Never?
- Yeah.
1917
01:37:05,192 --> 01:37:06,692
Went straight
to the motorcycle.
1918
01:37:08,317 --> 01:37:11,025
Before Christmas,
I had a sexual encounter with Maria,
1919
01:37:11,108 --> 01:37:12,692
[whispers] and it was great.
1920
01:37:12,775 --> 01:37:14,400
- [elevator dings]
- [automated voice] Door's opening.
1921
01:37:18,025 --> 01:37:22,192
Okay, so we've established
that we both want freedom.
1922
01:37:22,275 --> 01:37:25,275
- Maria, really?
- Oh, Paxton.
1923
01:37:25,358 --> 01:37:27,983
Paxton, we are about to make
the most important decision
1924
01:37:28,067 --> 01:37:29,942
of our lives.
Can you concentrate?
1925
01:37:31,192 --> 01:37:33,525
Okay, in our
decision-making process,
1926
01:37:33,608 --> 01:37:35,733
we haven't yet
discussed morality.
1927
01:37:35,817 --> 01:37:37,650
Look at that. That is...
1928
01:37:37,733 --> 01:37:40,775
That's a whole city
in lockdown.
1929
01:37:40,858 --> 01:37:43,233
Hospitals can't cope.
A million pounds would help.
1930
01:37:43,317 --> 01:37:46,067
We'd be doing good.
Plus, I worked it out.
1931
01:37:46,150 --> 01:37:47,900
If it's in 50s,
it all fits in one suitcase.
1932
01:37:47,983 --> 01:37:49,608
You can leave it on a doorstep.
Take that, Grandma.
1933
01:37:49,692 --> 01:37:52,900
- You got rid of Grandma.
- Yes, I did. Thank you.
1934
01:37:52,983 --> 01:37:55,983
So, okay, we do it.
1935
01:37:57,192 --> 01:37:58,192
Fuck it.
1936
01:37:59,025 --> 01:38:00,567
We decide right now.
1937
01:38:02,025 --> 01:38:02,942
Okay.
1938
01:38:04,233 --> 01:38:05,983
[chuckles]
1939
01:38:06,067 --> 01:38:07,900
Previously,
I would have kissed you.
1940
01:38:10,192 --> 01:38:11,983
Let's just see
what happens.
1941
01:38:31,525 --> 01:38:33,942
- Okay.
- Fuck.
1942
01:38:34,025 --> 01:38:35,525
- Maria?
- Okay, it's time to go.
1943
01:38:35,608 --> 01:38:37,608
- Really?
- We gotta go to the vaults.
1944
01:38:39,692 --> 01:38:41,817
[Paxton] So, are we gonna
do it or not?
1945
01:38:44,733 --> 01:38:46,650
[Paxton panting]
1946
01:38:57,358 --> 01:38:59,192
- [unzips bag]
- Are you okay?
1947
01:38:59,275 --> 01:39:01,608
God, no.
1948
01:39:01,692 --> 01:39:03,733
Is God really part
of your in-head jury?
1949
01:39:03,817 --> 01:39:05,025
Uh-huh.
1950
01:39:05,108 --> 01:39:06,858
And for the record,
God is absolutely fine
1951
01:39:06,942 --> 01:39:08,733
with whatever it is
that we decide to do.
1952
01:39:09,608 --> 01:39:11,025
[Paxton]
That's good to know.
1953
01:39:12,567 --> 01:39:14,400
- [Linda] Hi, there. P.J., right?
- Yes, miss.
1954
01:39:14,483 --> 01:39:15,900
[Linda] Lead the way.
1955
01:39:18,400 --> 01:39:21,025
Why does the name Edgar
Allen Poe ring a bell?
1956
01:39:24,525 --> 01:39:26,525
- [phone rings]
- [groans]
1957
01:39:28,775 --> 01:39:30,525
[indistinct chatter]
1958
01:39:34,983 --> 01:39:36,608
- [Linda] Thank you.
- You're welcome.
1959
01:40:02,317 --> 01:40:03,900
[man] You're shipping
that thing to New York?
1960
01:40:07,567 --> 01:40:11,275
[indistinct announcement
on PA]
1961
01:40:35,983 --> 01:40:37,525
- [Linda] It's an underwater theme.
- Yeah.
1962
01:40:37,608 --> 01:40:39,900
- My idea.
- It's nice.
1963
01:40:39,983 --> 01:40:41,983
You're very good at what you do.
What you did.
1964
01:40:43,775 --> 01:40:45,317
[Linda] Okay, so we only need
to pack up
1965
01:40:45,400 --> 01:40:46,733
the jewelry and accessories.
1966
01:40:46,817 --> 01:40:48,150
The clothing
all goes downstairs,
1967
01:40:48,233 --> 01:40:49,358
so it shouldn't
take too long.
1968
01:40:49,442 --> 01:40:51,150
Yeah, not too long,
so, uh...
1969
01:40:52,192 --> 01:40:53,567
Shall I take it out?
1970
01:40:54,483 --> 01:40:56,525
Yes. Why not?
1971
01:40:57,025 --> 01:40:58,608
[grunts]
1972
01:41:04,692 --> 01:41:05,858
[Linda] Okay.
1973
01:41:18,442 --> 01:41:20,067
[water bubbling]
1974
01:41:25,733 --> 01:41:27,233
[Linda] Do it quickly,
the fish are piranhas.
1975
01:41:27,317 --> 01:41:30,483
- What?
- It's meant to be symbolic.
1976
01:41:30,567 --> 01:41:31,983
- Symbolic of...
- I don't remember, okay.
1977
01:41:32,067 --> 01:41:33,483
Just do it faster.
1978
01:41:33,567 --> 01:41:35,275
You'll be fine.
1979
01:41:43,942 --> 01:41:45,108
[Paxton grunts]
1980
01:41:47,817 --> 01:41:49,608
[breathes heavily]
1981
01:41:51,442 --> 01:41:52,983
So, this is the moment.
1982
01:41:54,608 --> 01:41:57,650
Just seems so easy.
1983
01:41:57,733 --> 01:41:59,733
It's never been
about can we do it, Paxton.
1984
01:41:59,817 --> 01:42:01,608
It's about...
should we do it?
1985
01:42:01,692 --> 01:42:03,400
And will we do it?
It's about you and me.
1986
01:42:03,483 --> 01:42:06,067
And I'm not saying
that we are going to do it,
1987
01:42:06,150 --> 01:42:10,192
but if we are, then you would need
to take one step to your left.
1988
01:42:12,942 --> 01:42:15,150
So, shall I take the step?
1989
01:42:17,192 --> 01:42:18,650
Take the step.
Then, we decide.
1990
01:42:23,233 --> 01:42:24,692
Linda...
1991
01:42:24,775 --> 01:42:25,733
if we are deciding
in the moment,
1992
01:42:25,817 --> 01:42:27,692
then I say we do it.
1993
01:42:27,775 --> 01:42:29,442
If we are letting
the moment decide,
1994
01:42:29,525 --> 01:42:33,525
then, in my opinion,
the moment is saying loud and clear...
1995
01:42:33,608 --> 01:42:34,983
"Put the replica
in the fucking box
1996
01:42:35,067 --> 01:42:36,983
and put the real thing
in your bag."
1997
01:42:39,108 --> 01:42:43,650
Freedom, Linda,
in one beautiful moment.
1998
01:42:49,775 --> 01:42:50,942
[Linda exhales]
1999
01:43:08,192 --> 01:43:09,525
[Paxton gasps]
2000
01:43:11,650 --> 01:43:13,108
[exhales]
2001
01:43:16,150 --> 01:43:17,650
Okay.
2002
01:43:18,650 --> 01:43:19,817
Okay.
2003
01:43:22,150 --> 01:43:23,442
- It's under control.
- It's under control.
2004
01:43:23,525 --> 01:43:25,608
- Under control.
- [softly] Yeah.
2005
01:43:27,567 --> 01:43:30,733
I think we should start
with the handbags,
2006
01:43:30,817 --> 01:43:33,858
and, uh, [hesitates] we
should get the dust bags...
2007
01:43:33,942 --> 01:43:35,150
Linda!
2008
01:43:35,233 --> 01:43:36,442
- Linda, it's me.
- [Linda] Donald.
2009
01:43:36,525 --> 01:43:39,608
I need to speak to you
urgently.
2010
01:43:39,692 --> 01:43:42,442
Um, excuse me,
could you please take a stroll
2011
01:43:42,525 --> 01:43:44,192
or something for a moment?
2012
01:43:44,275 --> 01:43:46,692
I have some very important
things to say to my colleague.
2013
01:43:48,608 --> 01:43:50,775
Uh... Uh-huh.
2014
01:43:53,275 --> 01:43:54,567
Uh...
2015
01:43:55,067 --> 01:43:56,317
Donald...
2016
01:43:56,400 --> 01:43:59,067
Well, goodness,
I thought that I fired you,
2017
01:43:59,150 --> 01:44:00,483
but you're here.
2018
01:44:00,567 --> 01:44:02,983
Linda, listen. Someone made
an anonymous call
2019
01:44:03,067 --> 01:44:04,650
to Miracore head office.
2020
01:44:04,733 --> 01:44:06,983
They said that the driver
from B2B
2021
01:44:07,067 --> 01:44:08,942
who is carrying
the Eve Schwarz collection
2022
01:44:09,025 --> 01:44:10,442
is using a false name.
2023
01:44:10,525 --> 01:44:12,525
They said he's got
a criminal record.
2024
01:44:13,567 --> 01:44:15,608
[sighs] Grandma, hey.
2025
01:44:15,692 --> 01:44:17,942
I came as soon as I could.
Thank God you're okay.
2026
01:44:18,025 --> 01:44:19,942
- I'm okay.
- Well, the police are coming.
2027
01:44:20,025 --> 01:44:22,317
- The police are coming and...
- They'll be here any minute.
2028
01:44:22,400 --> 01:44:24,650
They'll be here any minute.
Okay, that's...
2029
01:44:24,733 --> 01:44:26,067
Now we're against
the clock.
2030
01:44:26,150 --> 01:44:28,275
Uh, if he's innocent
and who he says he is,
2031
01:44:28,358 --> 01:44:29,983
- then everything will...
- Everything will be okay.
2032
01:44:30,067 --> 01:44:32,567
And it will be okay, Donald,
because I know what to do.
2033
01:44:32,650 --> 01:44:33,817
[hesitates] What do you mean?
2034
01:44:33,900 --> 01:44:34,650
- What are you going to do?
- Paxton?
2035
01:44:34,733 --> 01:44:35,650
Paxton?
2036
01:44:37,983 --> 01:44:40,317
Donald. Paxton.
2037
01:44:40,400 --> 01:44:41,775
Paxton. Donald.
2038
01:44:41,858 --> 01:44:42,942
Who are you?
2039
01:44:43,025 --> 01:44:44,650
I'm Edgar Allen Poe,
obviously.
2040
01:44:44,733 --> 01:44:46,900
- She just called you Paxton.
- Yes, Donald, this is Paxton.
2041
01:44:46,983 --> 01:44:49,650
And I'm a woman
called Linda Jarvis.
2042
01:44:49,733 --> 01:44:53,233
I'm an ordinary woman
who, 60 seconds ago,
2043
01:44:53,317 --> 01:44:55,483
made an extraordinary
decision.
2044
01:44:55,567 --> 01:44:56,942
[softly] Linda,
what are you going to tell him?
2045
01:44:57,025 --> 01:44:58,358
[Donald] What is it
to do with you?
2046
01:44:58,442 --> 01:45:01,900
What it has to do
with him is that...
2047
01:45:01,983 --> 01:45:04,817
he is my partner and my
lover of ten years standing,
2048
01:45:04,900 --> 01:45:06,733
and I think
I'm still in love with him.
2049
01:45:06,817 --> 01:45:08,150
- [inhales deeply]
- Really?
2050
01:45:08,233 --> 01:45:10,692
But most importantly,
he is also my accomplice.
2051
01:45:10,775 --> 01:45:13,317
You see, Donald, just now...
just one minute ago,
2052
01:45:13,400 --> 01:45:15,025
I decided... We decided
2053
01:45:15,108 --> 01:45:17,358
to steal the Harris Diamond
worth three million pounds.
2054
01:45:17,442 --> 01:45:19,358
[sighs] Holy fuck.
Confession avalanche.
2055
01:45:19,442 --> 01:45:20,608
[Linda] No, it's okay,
and I know Donald
2056
01:45:20,692 --> 01:45:21,817
and also we don't have
a choice,
2057
01:45:21,900 --> 01:45:23,233
because Donald
called the police
2058
01:45:23,317 --> 01:45:24,608
and they're about to arrive
at any second.
2059
01:45:24,692 --> 01:45:26,358
- [Paxton] Oh, fuck!
- Like I said,
2060
01:45:26,442 --> 01:45:28,108
it's going to be okay,
because when the police arrive,
2061
01:45:28,192 --> 01:45:29,858
we are not going to be here,
we are going to be gone.
2062
01:45:29,942 --> 01:45:31,442
- You are?
- Yes, we are.
2063
01:45:31,525 --> 01:45:33,025
And Donald
is going to tell them
2064
01:45:33,108 --> 01:45:34,317
that he talked to Linda
2065
01:45:34,400 --> 01:45:35,608
and she said
that everything's fine,
2066
01:45:35,692 --> 01:45:37,025
it was all
a misunderstanding.
2067
01:45:37,108 --> 01:45:39,817
And then, he is going
to give them this,
2068
01:45:39,900 --> 01:45:41,567
your ID verification.
2069
01:45:41,650 --> 01:45:43,942
And you're going to say that
you recognize that driver
2070
01:45:44,025 --> 01:45:45,358
from another assignment.
2071
01:45:45,442 --> 01:45:46,733
And then, you're going
to tell them a story.
2072
01:45:46,817 --> 01:45:48,525
You're going
to tell them a story
2073
01:45:48,608 --> 01:45:50,858
about how this driver has an
enemy at work who hates him.
2074
01:45:50,942 --> 01:45:52,483
- I am?
- Yes, you are.
2075
01:45:52,567 --> 01:45:54,900
And do you know why you're
going to do all this, Donald?
2076
01:45:54,983 --> 01:45:58,108
- No. Why?
- Because we are good.
2077
01:45:58,192 --> 01:46:00,442
Paxton, Donald,
we three are good.
2078
01:46:00,525 --> 01:46:02,150
And the bastards
who told me to fire you
2079
01:46:02,233 --> 01:46:03,692
and the bastard
who bought that diamond,
2080
01:46:03,775 --> 01:46:06,067
they won't even realize
that it's gone.
2081
01:46:06,150 --> 01:46:08,733
- Mention the NHS.
- Yeah. Yes, ooh!
2082
01:46:10,983 --> 01:46:12,733
What do you say, Donald?
2083
01:46:12,817 --> 01:46:14,733
Will you
lie for us, Donald?
2084
01:46:17,317 --> 01:46:21,567
[Donald] I see all this
anarchy is because of lockdown.
2085
01:46:21,650 --> 01:46:24,108
Idiotic,
insane fucking lockdown
2086
01:46:24,192 --> 01:46:25,608
which has liberated us all.
2087
01:46:25,692 --> 01:46:27,150
Donald, we'll give you money.
I'll give you 200 grand.
2088
01:46:27,233 --> 01:46:28,650
Fuck the money.
I don't do this for money,
2089
01:46:28,733 --> 01:46:29,692
I do this for beauty.
2090
01:46:29,775 --> 01:46:31,650
Linda, you are wonderful.
2091
01:46:31,733 --> 01:46:35,608
[chuckles] Linda, and he is
your secret bandit lover,
2092
01:46:35,692 --> 01:46:37,608
and you are going
to spit in the face
2093
01:46:37,692 --> 01:46:39,400
of the global monolith.
2094
01:46:39,483 --> 01:46:41,025
During lockdown
I've had time
2095
01:46:41,108 --> 01:46:44,692
to think and walk in the park
near my mother's house,
2096
01:46:44,775 --> 01:46:47,525
and God, apart from the
dog walkers and the joggers
2097
01:46:47,608 --> 01:46:50,983
breathing everywhere, God,
it is a beautiful world.
2098
01:46:51,067 --> 01:46:53,150
Even before
the fucking virus,
2099
01:46:53,233 --> 01:46:55,608
we were all locked down
in our own routines,
2100
01:46:55,692 --> 01:46:57,317
our versions
of ourselves...
2101
01:46:57,400 --> 01:46:58,567
Linda, we have to get
the fuck out of here.
2102
01:46:58,650 --> 01:47:00,108
Let Donald have his moment.
2103
01:47:00,192 --> 01:47:01,275
[Donald]
...never get to work!
2104
01:47:01,358 --> 01:47:02,567
I only came here tonight
2105
01:47:02,650 --> 01:47:03,942
because I was worried
about you, Linda.
2106
01:47:04,025 --> 01:47:05,567
I don't give a fuck
about Miracore,
2107
01:47:05,650 --> 01:47:08,108
their fucking diamonds,
I don't care about them.
2108
01:47:08,192 --> 01:47:11,067
I want everything
to be stolen.
2109
01:47:11,150 --> 01:47:14,067
I will lie for you, Linda,
2110
01:47:14,150 --> 01:47:19,817
because this is my moment
to fucking do something!
2111
01:47:32,317 --> 01:47:33,900
Mad, all this, isn't it?
2112
01:47:33,983 --> 01:47:35,567
- Yeah.
- [chuckles]
2113
01:47:35,650 --> 01:47:37,442
Who'd have thought a month
ago we'd be doing this.
2114
01:47:38,358 --> 01:47:39,483
Not me.
2115
01:47:39,567 --> 01:47:41,525
[PA system chimes]
2116
01:47:41,608 --> 01:47:43,817
[man on PA]
Paging Edgar Allen Poe.
2117
01:47:43,900 --> 01:47:47,483
Edgar Allen Poe,
please report to security.
2118
01:47:47,567 --> 01:47:51,817
["Shine On You Crazy Diamond"
playing]
2119
01:47:54,442 --> 01:47:55,567
[elevator dings]
2120
01:48:00,150 --> 01:48:01,942
[PA system chimes]
2121
01:48:02,025 --> 01:48:03,692
[man] Mr. Edgar Allen Poe,
2122
01:48:03,775 --> 01:48:06,483
please report
to security immediately.
2123
01:48:06,567 --> 01:48:08,150
[Linda] I think
we should speed up.
2124
01:48:08,233 --> 01:48:10,817
Don't rush. We're not trying
to evacuate Dunkirk!
2125
01:48:10,900 --> 01:48:12,108
Stop there. If you walk,
2126
01:48:12,192 --> 01:48:14,150
you should be
on the starboard side.
2127
01:48:14,983 --> 01:48:16,442
[indistinct talking]
2128
01:48:16,525 --> 01:48:17,983
[Linda] Leave it.
Leave it.
2129
01:48:19,275 --> 01:48:20,858
Linda?
2130
01:48:20,942 --> 01:48:23,483
- [PA system chimes]
- [man] Paging Edgar Allen Poe.
2131
01:48:23,567 --> 01:48:26,567
Mr. Edgar Allen Poe,
please report to security.
2132
01:48:26,650 --> 01:48:29,358
It's Michael with
the arrows from Zoom.
2133
01:48:34,775 --> 01:48:37,400
- [PA system chimes]
- [man] Mr. Edgar Allen Poe,
2134
01:48:37,483 --> 01:48:40,442
please report
to security immediately.
2135
01:48:42,567 --> 01:48:44,692
[whispering] Oh, fuck.
2136
01:48:44,775 --> 01:48:46,650
You'll have to turn in
your Harrods pass.
2137
01:48:46,733 --> 01:48:48,025
You go. Save yourself.
2138
01:48:48,108 --> 01:48:49,400
It's me that fate
is fucking with.
2139
01:48:49,483 --> 01:48:51,358
Just keep walking.
2140
01:48:53,108 --> 01:48:54,400
[Mark] Edgar Allen Poe.
2141
01:48:57,025 --> 01:48:58,983
[Mark panting]
2142
01:48:59,067 --> 01:49:00,692
You left this
in the office.
2143
01:49:02,233 --> 01:49:03,942
You'll need it at Heathrow.
2144
01:49:07,900 --> 01:49:10,150
Thanks very much.
2145
01:49:10,233 --> 01:49:13,275
Everybody says, uh,
come back soon, Linda,
2146
01:49:13,358 --> 01:49:14,650
and we all love you.
2147
01:50:20,900 --> 01:50:22,150
Since that night,
we've established
2148
01:50:22,233 --> 01:50:23,817
that although we're now
both rich
2149
01:50:23,900 --> 01:50:26,025
and no longer have
to do jobs we despise,
2150
01:50:26,108 --> 01:50:27,358
the strains of lockdown
2151
01:50:27,442 --> 01:50:28,983
are still severely testing
our relationship.
2152
01:50:29,067 --> 01:50:30,650
"Happy ever after"
cannot survive
2153
01:50:30,733 --> 01:50:32,608
someone hiding
your bag of flour.
2154
01:50:32,692 --> 01:50:34,275
Okay, come on. Okay.
2155
01:50:35,317 --> 01:50:37,692
Here is your bag of flour.
I just...
2156
01:50:37,775 --> 01:50:39,900
I want you to promise me that
you're not gonna make bread.
2157
01:50:39,983 --> 01:50:41,233
[Paxton] Why not?
2158
01:50:41,317 --> 01:50:43,192
Because of the mess
and the pointlessness
2159
01:50:43,275 --> 01:50:45,858
and because it will be inedible,
and like all homemade bread,
2160
01:50:45,942 --> 01:50:47,358
it will be a fucking
pointless cannonball.
2161
01:50:47,442 --> 01:50:49,233
My dad used to make it
and we had to eat it,
2162
01:50:49,317 --> 01:50:50,775
otherwise he would disappear
into his workshop
2163
01:50:50,858 --> 01:50:53,108
and make these
hopeless wooden toys.
2164
01:50:53,192 --> 01:50:55,025
- Never again.
- Linda, you've lost your mind.
2165
01:50:55,108 --> 01:50:55,942
What? I've lost...
2166
01:50:56,025 --> 01:50:57,358
You buried a hedgehog
2167
01:50:57,442 --> 01:50:59,567
and said a eulogy
over the fucking grave.
2168
01:50:59,650 --> 01:51:01,775
And you deliberately stuck a
piece of tinsel on the ceiling
2169
01:51:01,858 --> 01:51:03,858
- above the stairs.
- No, it was there all along.
2170
01:51:03,942 --> 01:51:05,858
- I almost broke my fucking neck.
- If you'd asked me,
2171
01:51:05,942 --> 01:51:07,108
I would have held
the stepladders.
2172
01:51:07,192 --> 01:51:08,192
If it had been there
"all along,"
2173
01:51:08,275 --> 01:51:09,650
I would have noticed it.
2174
01:51:09,733 --> 01:51:11,108
But you haven't noticed
that there was no point
2175
01:51:11,192 --> 01:51:12,483
in packing a suitcase
2176
01:51:12,567 --> 01:51:15,400
because there is nowhere
you can actually go.
2177
01:51:15,483 --> 01:51:18,067
They just extended lockdown
by another two weeks.
2178
01:51:21,733 --> 01:51:23,150
Oh, shit.
2179
01:51:25,192 --> 01:51:27,525
[exhales] Well...
2180
01:51:28,983 --> 01:51:30,400
All that
for a bag of flour
2181
01:51:30,483 --> 01:51:32,900
and a definitely
pre-existing piece of tinsel.
2182
01:51:32,983 --> 01:51:37,525
And because today
is my birthday.
2183
01:51:38,650 --> 01:51:39,942
- [mumbles]
- It's okay.
2184
01:51:40,025 --> 01:51:41,525
- I know.
- [chuckles] It's okay.
2185
01:51:41,608 --> 01:51:43,567
- It's lockdown.
- No, I knew that.
2186
01:51:43,650 --> 01:51:46,733
- Nobody knows what day it is, never mind the date.
- And I got you something.
2187
01:51:46,817 --> 01:51:48,817
I got you something
you really, really want.
2188
01:51:53,400 --> 01:51:54,983
[chuckles]
2189
01:51:56,317 --> 01:51:57,942
Go crazy.
2190
01:52:00,567 --> 01:52:04,317
- Another two weeks?
- Another two weeks.
2191
01:52:04,400 --> 01:52:07,108
Well, then,
my long suffering public
2192
01:52:07,192 --> 01:52:09,483
may need another poem.
2193
01:52:10,192 --> 01:52:11,358
[Linda] Hmm.
2194
01:52:11,442 --> 01:52:14,275
Counting The Beats
by Robert Graves.
2195
01:52:15,608 --> 01:52:19,567
"You, love, and I,
you and I,
2196
01:52:19,650 --> 01:52:21,442
and if no more
than only you and I,
2197
01:52:21,525 --> 01:52:24,358
what care you and I?"
2198
01:52:24,442 --> 01:52:26,233
[Linda laughing]
2199
01:52:29,483 --> 01:52:35,733
"Counting the beats,
counting the slow heartbeats,
2200
01:52:35,817 --> 01:52:40,317
the bleeding to death of time
in slow heartbeats,
2201
01:52:40,400 --> 01:52:42,983
wakeful we lie.
2202
01:52:43,067 --> 01:52:48,733
Cloudless day, night,
and another cloudless day,
2203
01:52:48,817 --> 01:52:53,483
yet a huge cloud will burst
upon their heads one day."
2204
01:52:53,567 --> 01:52:56,317
And on that day,
lockdown will end!
2205
01:52:56,400 --> 01:52:58,192
["Wigwam" playing]
2206
01:52:59,233 --> 01:53:02,317
"Only here,
as we are here, together,
2207
01:53:02,400 --> 01:53:07,483
now and here,
always you and I."
2208
01:53:18,717 --> 01:53:23,717
Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull