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We pretend. Every day.
We are someone else on the set, someone else on social media...
and yet someone else in reality.
Tho it's less and less of this reality...
Andrzej Kutz. But with TZ at the end.
To admit that you’re being yourself nowadays
is like handing an Oscar.
Fuck, these creeps will get everywhere!
If you can’t walk you cow go back to the barn!
Did you just call me a cow? For now your udders are out!
Where do you think you’re going? It’s a private party!
Get the fuck back behind the line!
Are you fucking deaf?
Gentlemen, please, we’re taking lady’s pictures.
She’s been milking everyone so now they will milk her.
Kate, no, no. Jesus Christ...
Hello my Dear!
How nice of you that you’ve looked after this seat but it’s mine...
I am sure there are still seats at the back...
Your body of work is shining at the back.
Stop flinging like minnow on a deck.
Look at them, sweet widows, fucking besties.
Just wait to see their faces
when the conveyancer will read the will.
Their hair extensions will be flying in the air!
Shush!
Piss off.
Hey, but where are we?
You were supposed to take me to some after party.
Yeah babe. This is an „after life” party.
Seba, but how can I go like this?
- Is this egg made of gold? - Yep, gold.
I don’t think it will last here long then.
Innit?
Crowds. The sea of heads. Just like on his every movie.
But without happily ever after this time.
This time there will be no ovations at the end.
But maybe there should be? Radek, mate...
Thank you.
In Radosław’s name, thank you very much.
Dear gathered, Radek has taught me a lot.
Whoever has seen my latest movie knows
how much I’ve unfolded my creative skills.
He used to love sunsets like this one the most.
I always make movies during happy hours as well, but you already know that...
But in which line?
Why third?! What am I? Some third-story sweetheart?
I would not be here if not Radek.
I mean, I wouldn’t be where I am in life in general.
Reservation at the funeral?! Great!
- Ala! - Maybe I can get a pass, huh?
The last shall ones be the first ones.
You’d probably tell us:
„Fuck these damn likes and ass clenching.
Go back home!”
Talk to your kid.
Hug your wife, lover or a dog.
I am late because this Edward Scissorhands
you’ve sent me to was supposed to transform my hairstyle...
He was like...
He was... like a father to me.
Darling... I grieve with you.
I remember that day well.
It was as hot as today...
I came late by an accident
and everyone got mad but you...
You were the only person who came close, hugged me and said
that the last ones shall be the first ones.
And you were right.
Rest in peace.
The unique moisture feeling is due
to the creamy texture and the pumpkin seeds oil.
You can only get it today and here!
Yes Darlings, that's right.
Will you excuse me, I have to take this.
Hello?
Let’s see what momma shall cook today...
I have buyers and I need to show them the apartment tomorrow.
- Errr, sure... - Will you be able to leave somewhere?
My apologies Darlings, but it’s my business partner.
But where to you want me to go? We’re in the middle of pandemic.
- So at least try to be inconspicious. - How the hell can I be inconspicious?!
Act it out? You’re an actress in the end.
Down the stairs, door on the right.
What do we have here today?
Buckwheat madness in an aggplant tunnel
assisted by a nectar from Me-WHAT dates?!
Darlings,
I know that we are in the middle of a pandemic but can you imagine
that I’ve just been offered
a lucrative advertising opportunity?
Warmly welcome from Alicja... No.
I warmly welcome you on my fired up frying pan.
Warmed up Alicja welcomes you on her fired up frying pan.
Yes. No.
No.
Not now, Dakota.
It’s my cat for fuck sake!
Watch out, this dish might be a bit spicy
but it’s delicious and healthy for you.
And it took me less than 15 minutes to make it.
Mr Andrzej, your laptop’s ringing.
Come on Mr Andrzej!
I don’t give a flying fuck that we’re in a lockdown and the cinemas are closed.
If he won’t pay for fuck sake, he’ll be distributing movies about peanuts
or some niche black and yellow shite made in the depth of some fucking village!
Here’s the buckwheat madness
in an eggplant tunnes assited by a nectar from dates.
Delicious, isn’t it?
Thumbs up. Warm goodbyes from your fired up Alicja.
Medjool, for fuck sake! Medjool dates.
Remember to clap at 8pm every day for Medicians!
Subscribe my channel and remember about this event for NHS!
Covid number 19, who has not fallen asleep won’t fall asleep,
the Doc has no idea how to help, the patient turns pale, this is a plague,
the govermnment did shit even it was supposed to help, so I will assist you
with the advice get the fuck out of here in the Antonow.
That’s why I am squeaky clean. I am squeaky clean.
I am clean like a child’s whistle,
ain’t wiped with his mother’s hand.
I am squeaky clean. I am squeaky clean.
Welcome again to Pandemic Game!
In the first live online crime game.
Where will the investigation lead us? We will find out soon.
The world has turned upside down and became little sad.
That’s why we will do everything in our power
to serve you the best entertainment possible!
#PandemicGame
On board we have
Alicja Kopytkowska as Ms. Larson.
Oh, I love that kind of change!
I prefer this better than myself in reality!
Can we keep it for good?
Pola Adamska as Ms. Flynn.
As Gałczyński wrote: How will I stop this brook?
Anna Małek as Ms. Christie.
Can I please ask for a version without reptiles?
I beg you, no reptiles! Can change it somewhow?!
I beg you!
You should’ve seen Andrzej’s python.
It would’ve healed your phobia right away!
Oh, that’s much better!
And our gentlemen! Sebastian Stec as Mr. Chandler.
Hello, anybody out there? Say something as I don’t know whether to flex or hide?
Andrzej Kutz as Mr. Parker.
Al Capone, innit? Nothing’s impossible.
Literally a dream man! Older, stable and handsome.
And he doesn’t pay taxes.
That’s freaking awesome how you can make movies these days.
Borys Polak as Mr. Forsythe.
Oh no, no. What for do I need this pussy tickler?
I was supposed to look Italian, it’s in my contract! ITALIAN!
Not like a lad from the district in Warsaw!
And last but not least, Karol Warszawski as Mr. Hammet.
Spitting image of The Texas Ranger.
Hey, Chuck Norris, where’s your stallion gone?
Your pony’s gone with the wind ages ago!
Gentlemen, please... breaking winds in front of the ladies?
We’ve got to know our stars almost from every angle.
- Sit down, Andrzej. - Well done, Andrzej.
„Stereo Massage”...
I just didn’t put on any make up today.
From bottom to top, from bottom to top...
Will they be able to surprise us?
My name is Maxima and I am the host of this game.
Let the game begin!
We are in the lavish castle located away from the urban buzz and prying eyes.
You can see our six guests arriving at the courtyard
where Mr. Hammet will welcome them any minute now.
Now that’s what I am talking about Ladies and Gents!
You cannot refuse any pleasure in such a gorgeous surrounding!
If I lived here I wouldn’t wake up until dinner.
Nothing unusual.
What an unnecessary comment, Aniu.
You know what? I’d love to take a bath!
Do I have time?
- Am I able to have a bath? - Sure, Hun.
We’re waiting.
Gorgeous, gorgeous, pulls on the heart strings!
My dear, Doyle has been always famous for his brilliant alcohol cellar
so I let myself try it out. Cheers!
Oh, for real, enjoy.
- Quick start, quick end. - Extremely quick...
Ladies and Gentlemen.
I warmly welcome you in Mr. Doyle’s mansion!
Mr. Doyle feels sick and will join us for breakfast.
Meanwhile, he invites you to a dinner with a glass of wine.
Then you will be able to make yourself comfortable
in the rooms prepared for you.
And now, would you like to introduce yourself?
You must be Ms. Larson?
Ewa Larson, indeed. I am pleased to finally meet you.
Not mutual.
Oh really?
Ho, ho, ho.
Well, I am a lawyer, I work with Mr. Doyle.
I suggest using past tense.
Obviously.
So I am a lawyer and I have worked with Mr. Doyle
almost since the beginning of his career. We were like family.
But he has replaced you for a better model.
Well, life’s a bitch.
You’re not better in replacing people either...
And you are rude.
I’d say genetically honest.
- You didn’t even introduce yourself. - My apologies, Miss.
- Mrs. - Interesting...
What’s so interesting?
That there’s an amateour of sour apples and won’t let go till he dies.
As if!
- Boor! - Rather Hammet.
I am Mr. Doyle’s bodyguard and it’s my pleasure to take care of you.
Mrs. Christie, CO of Mr. Doyle’s Companies, and I can guarantee one thing.
A quickie or a mean Tweet?
No, no, no but I assure you Mr. Doyle will find out about everything.
Maybe we can tell him together at breakfast?
- Tiny dogs bark loudly. - I don’t understand?
I didn't expect any understanding from you.
Judging by your physionomy you are not a fountain of wisdom.
- Not really. - Parker.
I’ve known your boss longer than you have.
And you are famous mainly because you look everyone down
which in your case is quite ironic, but oh well.
Talking shit about others is a perfect revenge for your own failures.
My name’s Chandler and I used to work with him.
- With this twat? - No, with Mr. Doyle.
Hammet, can be used as a pig fertilizer for roses in the garden, at best.
Well, your career will not flourish anymore even with the best fertilizer.
Let me, Mr. Chandler, beat the shit out of him on your behalf.
I appreciate this Mr. Forshyte but it’s a futile effort.
You’ll be sentenced for a human while hitting a mongrel.
What a fantasy Mr. Doyle must have to invite such commoners to the parloues!
Mr. Doyle must have been completely unaware
that he had asked such a peasant to greet his guests.
Such an idiot.
Pardon me?
We are guests Mr. Hammet and guests are to be respected.
Respect? Respect for you Mr. Forsyte?
I’ve checked the facts. Mr.Doyle trusted you like a brother.
And you sold confidential information to competitors’.
- No, these are just rumors! - I’ve read about all of you...
as I always check Mr. Doyle’s guests.
What interesting have you read?
Not much about you.
Mostly you’re known for your crotch’s hospitality.
- Oh no, no, no, no, no! - Careful, you are poking a bomb.
Excuse me, may I suggest a shot to relieve the tension?
Drinking with you is like swallowing a cotter.
They say that even lying down you can still fall lower.
So, maybe a small summary?
Mr. Forsyte pretends to be a righteous citizen
but he’s best known for throwing straight rights and rows in the casinos.
Mr. Parker pretends to be a proud intellectual.
Such a pity that his wallet is empty.
And Mr. Chandler, a cynic who’s not treating himself seriously,
but deep down lays a childish sensitivity
and he has to get wasted to get through the next day.
And our ladies.
The ex-lawyer who wants to get back to the top
but forgot that maybe instead of pigging out she should move her ass.
The second one is a heartless young slag and our cherry on top - Ms. Christie.
She’ll straighten up her fake tits and stab you in the back.
Oh no, no, no, let’s make it clear! My tits are real! Both of them!
What a lush atmosphere, almost like in a public TV.
Who said it will be nice?
Well, how would you introduce yourself?
Fucking dickhead.
Frustrated or just a wanker?
- Both. - Now that’s what we like.
- Peasant who cannot fight back. - Exactly.
This is better than seeing Niagara Falls in winter!
Indeed.
I tried to explain to Mr. Doyle that inviting people like you to the salons
is a pointless idea.
Hold on a minute. What do you mean by „people like us”?
Human shadows. Doomed to be always on a second plan.
Maybe it’s worth coming to work sober for once Mr. Chandler, huh?
And does your fiance, Miss Flyn, know what were you doing with Mr. Doyle?
Forsyte, I bet you are trembling with fear now.
Whether or not I win.
I’m gonna beat the shit out of you so hard that you will fly out
- of this castle’s window. - Moron.
- Dear all... - Indomitable idiot.
They don’t sow idiots, they are being born themselves.
Hey, what’s all this? Will this seriously gonna look like that?
- Rudness and lack of sensivity. - Everybody calm down.
But why this moron is sitting and offending everyone?
Enough.
This is some kind of a circus we are only missing elephants.
Hey, good vibes only!
Excuse me, can someone take control over this mess?
Dear all, please calm down.
You’re breaking up the rules.
- Any more comments, Karol? - I beg you all...
I will have to stop this.
But I do. I even have two.
Dear viewers.
I think that the level of excitement has surprised us all.
The game is heating up.
. Let's ask our actors how do they like the formula of this show.
Is improvising very different from playing written roles?
Who would like to speak first? Alicja?
Well, it was a very intense and interesting experience
and I think it must have surprised us all a bit.
A bit.
- Andrzej? - Well, I mean...
New times, new technologies, I guess we got a little bit lost.
Emotions, emotions, emotions and once again, emotions.
No need to hide the fact that we all got a bit overwhelmed.
Online improvisation. I liked it a lot tho.
And I am very happy I can be a part of this
and I am sure our viewers are also surprised.
For sure not less than we are.
Surely it’s as intense for them as it is for us.
It was so fresh.
Borys?
I got into the role very deeply.
I’ve released such an intensity, even some restlessness,
although I am a very calm and composed person in private.
Interesting acting experience I must say, but I have known Karol since school
and we’ve done such scenes more than once, right?
True that and I agree with Borys, it was an interesting experience
especially that we got exact instructions which I guess viewers are not able to see.
I am extremely curious what my colleagues had on their phones
as I tried to follow my guidelines very precisely.
You were very accurate Karol. Really.
I have to admit I was a bit confused as I forgot to read all the instructions
and now when I look at them
I am not entirely sure I presented my character correctly.
But I am glad if the viewers liked it.
- I am sure they did. - Sebastian?
It was lush. I really liked what my colleagues did.
I haven't seen some of them in such good roles in a long time
and some of them never.
Me too.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
It’s time to take the game to another level.
Our guests have spent the first night in the castle
and they are about to meet the host.
I’d like to invite you to breakfast now, and Mr. Hammet will go get Mr. Doyle
so he can personally welcome you all at his castle.
- What? - Mr. Doyle...
Are you okay, Mr. Hammet?
- What happened? - Mr. Doyle WHAT?
He’s dead.
- Oops. - What?
- Oh my, but how? - That was fast.
But what happened?
The injuries on his body leave no doubt.
He was killed.
- Oh my God. - Killed to death?
But who did it?
Dear all, Mr. Doyle’s death surprised us all
and cannot go unnoticed.
The main requirement to finish the game is to identify the killer.
One thing is for sure. The perpetrator is among us.
There’s no time to waste
therefore Mr. Hammet will perform the initial steps.
The killer’s motive and psychological profile.
These are the key words to start any police investigation.
You know each other well.
You know what was everyone’s connection with the victim.
I want each of you to turn into a criminal policeman and create a killer’s profile.
I want to know about
every abrasion of the epidermis, broken ribs, a torn shirt’s sleeve
which would indicate a fight he fought with the killer before his death.
It’s obvious that a woman couldn’t have done that.
And Mr. Forsyte is the most hotheaded in this group.
Anger and jealousy that have matured through the years
are a dangerous combination.
And finally he couldn’t fight it anymore...
Okay, okay.
Weren’t you resented that Doyle pushed you on a side for the younger woman?
- Pardon me? - What rules the world? Sex, obviously.
Sex is humanity’s engine.
So many great men...
have left this world because of what? Because of women!
I cannot even. What was that?
Listen, Doyle must have been killed by a woman.
My dear all, It’s Larson who has killed in revenge.
Of course. Attack is the best form of defence.
Is it jealousy or a pain in your tail that you cannot be in his place?
Excuse me, pain in tail?
„When the fucker dies I’ll get back to the game”, wasn’t it like that?
- These words are taken out of context. - Context, dear sir, is irrelevant here.
Pardon me, the innocent has spoken!
It seems like you, Mr. Forsyte and Mr. Doyle were business partners
and it seems like you had a fight over money.
There you go.
The court needs evidence, these are just words!
- You had a motive Mr. - Please stop interrupting me.
Indeed, it was Christie who killed Doyle.
Great proof of murder to me.
Do you, Ms. Flynn, confirm Ms. Larson’s words?
I do.
Geez, just look how quiet and calm Ms. Flyn is today.
Or is it a deliberate strategy?
I think it was like that.
It's not true, these are some libels, I didn't kill him,
I saw him last time a month ago, I swear!
Ms. Flyn, what were you doing in the Herald Hotel on February 14th?
I remind you that it’s a Valentine’s Day.
- Ms. Flyn? - Ms. Flyn, can you hear us?
- Hello? - Is everything alright?
Ms. Flyn.
Beautiful women are so easily moved by their own beauty.
Could you kindly stop making such comments, Mr. Chandler?
This is an escape from the (crime) scene.
Calm down, she’s probably having a migrene.
She kept moaning about it since she arrived.
Or maybe something really happened?
What if she fainted?
Mr. Hammet can we call a doctor?
Let’s wait, it’s probably a shock after losing a close person.
Maybe it’s the climate.
The damp in the castle is so high that it strangles me.
Ms. Flyn!
Today’s Pandemic Game has just come to the end.
Thank you to our dear actors and viewers
for your active participation and live comments.
See you in the next episode.
- Are we still live? - I think we’re not, no.
Karol, have you fucking lost your mind?
What was that all about?
- Dear all, can we just chill down? - Chill down? Can you chill down?
- What? - Dick in the face!
What were all these comments about, have you fucking lost your mind?
Are you pretending or your head is paneled, man?
What were all these allusions about?
Fake tits, vodka, casinos, empty wallet, people can take it for the truth!
Shit’s gonna stick to us and you will do nothing about it!
- Wait, hold a minute. - Wait, what?
You play for yourself, you will do anything to be in the centre of attention.
You are not alone! There are others as well!
People will take it as truth and will think that we are fucked up.
They will think we are cunts.
I will be afraid to leave the house even tho I am not going out yet.
And someone can really think that Pola is a goer.
What do you mean by „think”?
Because you keep talking fucking rubbish.
It’s rude and insensitive.
- It's rather an act and a game. - Fuckact.
- A fucking creator, huh. - Fuckact.
I needed this game like hooker needs panties.
- Sure, but ka-ching will be cool, huh? - As if the money’s great.
Hipocrite.
Won’t find 100k on the streets, innit?
100k? I got paid 50k.
Maybe you should’ve changed an agent. Who’s managing you?
Well, probably that’s the first installment.
- I will check the contract. - Are you with Ewa?
- They will pay me as much as you, right? - For sure.
Listen, but Karol has gone too far. I won’t let it go so easily.
Karol, what kind of a fuckery was that?
Are you pulling out the beating case on live TV?
- You are fucked up. - For fuck sake, hold on a minute.
I said what they told me to say.
Who told you? How? Who told you to keep talking shit?
Haven’t you received the instructions on your phones?
- What fucking instructions? - Shit-structions!
Don’t you understand that it’s normally written on my character’s card?
I have to be unpleasant, Borys is aggressive, Seba is an alcoholic
and Pola is a whore.
What are you stare at? It's either you or them fucking with me!
And then Seba’s drinking on live TV!
Apologies, Mr. Great Producer.
My contract really says I cannot drink on the show.
It doesn’t say a word about fucking.
OK, let’s not argue, it doesn’t help anyone.
And it’s not leading us anywhere.
Where this ambulance is from? From Pola’s?
It’s from here, let me check.
Alright, listen, what’s up with Pola?
Anyone has called her or is it just me getting worried?
You’ve seen her reaction.
Maybe she fell, fainted and no one’s there to help her.
She’s not picking up my calls either.
Relax, she lives with her fiance in the end.
- Actually, she doesn’t at he moment. - Why not, what happened?
- Doesn’t matter. - She doesn’t and that’s all.
Why are you so fucking curious? It’s their priviate issues.
Jesus, loosen your braids girl.
OK, calm down.
Everyone’s so fucking touchy during this pandemic.
- Touchy, exactly. - Jesus Christ.
What happened?
I think someone jumped out of the window in my tenement.
At yours?
Fuck sake, what’s happening here.
Listen, I have enough for today
I need to rethink if I still wanna be a part of this show. Cheers, guys.
Mrs. Irena.
Go fuck yourself!
Bye.
Where’s my lil’ partridge?
My lil’ partridge.
Not sure I remember your name is but you can remind me.
You wanna play?
I’ll show you how to play.
You have one new message: Ms. Anna I am sorry
but we can't give you a loan.
With all my sympathy for you my hands are tied.
I am sorry, regards.
This game is bizarre.
So stop playing.
Are you trying to tell me hat someone has exchanged my face
on the picture with that whore?
Yup, they photoshopped you as a gift.
Enough, get the fuck out of here. You’re hurting me and the baby.
What do you mean, don’t play?
Where will I earn 30k now?
There’s a pandemic and we have debts.
Darling, please, I beg you. Don’t do this.
Hey neighbour, you’d better delete all social media
and throw away your phone.
Seriously, what the fuck is happening here.
The number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable, please hold.
See Alwin I am paying that bitch and she’s not picking up.
Do you get it, mommy’s paying her and that hoe doesn’t have time for me.
Come over.
I don’t care that your kid needs you. I need you more.
Come over, now or I swear I’ll lose my mind!
It will be your conscience if I’m gonna go fucking insane.
Do you want me to have a panic attack?
Honey, what's going on?
Jesus Christ, hi. I was worried all night, what happened?
- I don’t get this Alicja, I swear. - But what, Darling?
Do you know why Anka has asked about that particular date?
- Do you know what has happened then? - No idea.
I was in a hotel with a guy and nobody knew about it.
Darling, hold on.
Ala, this is not a game, it’s a fucking life.
Pola!
Welcome to the next episode of Pandemic Game.
Let me remind you that our game is live
and our viewers have the opportunity to share their comments.
The death of businessman’s Doyle is an opportunity for our players
to demonstrate their investigate skills
and also a chance to clear pressed charges.
Each of you has been given detailed information
regarding the unfortunate night Doyle has died.
Mr. Hammet will play the role of investigator
and shall start the interrogation.
- Ms. Larson. - Yes?
Where were you during the murder?
- What murder? - Mr. Doyle’s.
That rich man who has died.
You were sorting out his legal stuff, hello?
Falling asleep at the set, classy.
Could you please get off me Mr. Chandler?
- Did I get on you? - Indeed I can feel your weight.
Ms. Larson.
Mrs. Irenka.
Excuse me.
Ms. Larson, but a botox bottle has been found next to Doyle’s body
which could’ve been used as a poison.
Wasn’t it a gift from you by any chance?
Excuse me?
Ms. Larson, please answer Mr. Parker’s question.
Are you suggesting that I use botox?
Yes.
Maybe you have some sight issues. Maybe you need a refferal to an oculist.
You’d better ask Ms. Christie about botox.
And what do I have in common with botox?
Maybe you need an advice from as oculist.
Tho I’d consider getting some at your age.
Pardon me?
I am speaking as Ms. Christie now.
I get it but won’t you answer Mr. Parker’s question?
What question, for Christ sake, I got lost.
About botox.
I will answer. I do not use botox...
and it wasn’t a gift from me, is it clear?
Dear viewers, are you curious why our celebrities became silent?
You’ll find out right after the break.
Alicja, we’d like to remind you about the date of your next treatment.
Your youth is in our hands.
Seba, here’s your cooperation bonus from: leading officer.
Will the best Polish actor find the time to review my latest script?
Sincerely yours, Krystian Felczer from: hidden caller’s ID.
Super Extra Facts. Extra for people in debt.
Bailif gives you a hard time?
Are you being harassed by the debt collector?
Is stealing from your friends not enough?
Do you need to act in porn movies to earn extra money? From: number unknown
The Doyle’s death investigation is gaining momentum.
I assume that each of our viewers have dreamed of getting into the shoes
of the commissioner of the criminal department once in a lifetime.
This show gives you such an opportunity
and I hope that the next hearing will allow us to choose the culprit.
Mr. Hammet, please continue.
Are you ready to continue?
Mr. Hammet.
Ms. Larson, have you seen anything suspicious
on the night of Mr. Doyle’s death?
Ms. Larson?
No I haven’t but I’ve heard someone’s screaming.
Whose scream was it?
Chandler’s. Yes, it was Chandler screaming. He was threatening someone.
Too much of Agatha Christie before going to bed.
- How will you comment this charge? - Easy, it wasn’t me.
Besides, I cut my finger at the dinner and I couldn’t stop bleeding
so if I killed Doyle you’d found my blood in his room.
Have you found a stranger’s blood there Mr. Hammet?
This information is strictly confidential.
You have an extremely comfortable role, Mr. Hammet. Exceptionally comfortable.
- Pardon me? - Victim’s bodyguard is out of suspicion.
- Where were you during the murder? - Have you killed him?
I wasn’t in the castle at the time of the murder and that should be enough for you.
Anyone can confirm this?
Let me remind you that it’s Mr. Hammet who’s asking questions.
Sure.
I have secured a handkerchief just before entering the victim’s room.
Does anyone know who this handkerchief belongs to?
It belongs to Ms. Flyn.
Not sure, maybe someone stole it from me.
Or someone’s trying to put the blame on me.
Are you suspecting someone?
My intuition tells me it's Mr. Hammet,
but it’s written here that maybe it’s Forsyte,
because he kept asking all night long where Mr. Doyle's room was.
Why was he asking?
I wanted to know if everyhing’s fine, what’s so weird about it?
You were agressive after alcohol.
Big news, when is he not aggressive?
- Me? Aggressive? - Okay, thank you.
Your turn, Mr. Parker.
Once, around 3 o’clock I went to have something to drink
and I’ve heard a bang.
Bang?
And then someone going down.
I saw her from a distance, but I know it was Ms. Christie.
You could smell her distinctive fragrance in the air.
I had the need to use the bathroom upstairs. It was dark and I fell over.
That’s very strange as you had a bathroom located next to your room.
You didn't have to head to the first floor, near Mr. Doyle's apartment.
Didn’t I?
Last question. Do any of you smoke cigars?
Nobody else but Parker.
I agree, smoke calms me down.
I'm sorry,
but I’ve found a cigar cutter in a brass cladding next to the deceased body.
Hold on a minute.
Are you ready to tell the truth Mr. Andrzej?
What the hell?
Or do you prefer to be called „Mr. Krystian”?
What do you mean by Mr. Andrzej?
As long as I remember correctly it should be Mr. Parker.
We are not allowed to use our real names. I am Andrzej, again.
What’s the fucking point? Where’s the the logic?
- Please stop using swear words. - Fuck this! Fuck this, for fuck sake!
I’ll be using use whatever the fuck I want!
I can’t swear now and in the next moment I will be able to swear
because someone’s gonna say so on that fucking phone?!
What the fuck is happening here? What kind of a cheap circus show is this?
Can’t you see this, are you stunned? Because they paid you?
They bought you and made fucking puppets out of you!
Borys, Karol, what’s happening, did they cut your balls off?
Why are you sitting like dicks in the cake? For fuck sake!
You know, what fuck you, FUCK YOU!
And I apologize dear Ladies and Gentlemen, I am really sorry,
but I put on pants today as it was supposed to be elegant today!
But it will never be fucking elegant here.
Excuse me, can anyone?
Maybe, I don’t know.
Are we still broadcasting live or not?
The host was here but I think he’s gone now.
She's gone, actually.
I am still here.
So are we live or not?
I think so as the comments are coming in.
It’s the first time I see something like that.
Listen guys, I think that the best way is to disconnect.
Not every project has to be successful.
Alright. Dear viewers, I am extremely sorry.
I think that my colleagues are, too, but we’ve been tricked.
This show wasn’t supposed to look like this. I think it’s a game over.
Tomorrow our managers will release the statements. Bye.
Bye.
Are you lost baby girl?
Darlings, I stayed here especially for you
as you keep asking me about the brand of this dress.
There you go.
I thought it’s the right moment.
Listen, with the code LA ANIA
you will receive a 15% off on the website.
Tamara’s asking, what’s gonna happen with the game?
I’m not entirely sure, Babes,
but I can promise you that tomorrow morning
we are meeting at the „Peel-Off-Morning”
and I’ll answer all your burning questions.
Piotr. I’m all ears. Are you all fucking mad?
No, no Piotruś. We ain’t fucking mad. At least I am not.
Well Darlings, time to log off and say goodbye and remember -
see you tomorrow. Kisses, bye.
I want to know who’s behind this and who fucked me into that bloody game!
Okay, I’ll double check. I can’t remember off the top of my head.
You don’t remember off the top of your head
so remind yourself off the top of your ass!
Same old story.
You’re dragging me into some shit and then you’re leaving me alone in it.
- Mr. Sebastian Stec? - Yes, what’s up?
There’s a registered parcel you have to sign for.
Are all post officers wear such uniforms now?
Mr. Sebastian.
It’s not a bomb, is it?
Hello.
What do you mean they will be here in half a minute? Who?
What do you mean they are entering the staircase? I am at the apartment!
Where should I hide?
This is an emergency number, please hold for the operator.
What’s up Andrzej?
Who the hell is it?
And who are you trying to call?
Police, and who is this? Warszawski?
So I gotta tell you that you fucked up the phone numbers.
I didn’t fuck up anything. Are you working at 112 now?
I’d rather do nothing, you know.
Hey, wait, what’s showing up on your screen?
Old jerk.
Come on, are you kidding me?
No, I’ve saved your number like this for real.
You know what? And I wanted to invite you over for a barbacue after COVID’s gone
but in this case go and fuck yourself.
Black and white. I like it
Tank it up, babe.
You’re fired. I quit. Find me a new agent.
Chill down, Alicja. It will take time for people to forget.
Of course!
Get me a role in a porn movie! People will forget bout that either!
Your image has been tarnished before the show.
My nerves were tarnished before the show thanks to you.
You don’t even know how to flush the toilet without me.
- Maybe it’s time for a change? - Pardon me?
Maybe it’s time to rethink everything and tell the truth, Alicja.
- I’m going out. - OK.
You ain’t gonna even ask me where am I going?
Does it even matter?
Maybe it matters to me.
Maybe I'd like to.
After all, I am doing everything, right?
What else should I... Tell me, what else should I...?
Can’t we really do it normal?
I told you, you won’t be able to.
But I am not playing for fuck sake.
How much do you need? Two million? No worries.
Sorry sir, will you find 350 zlotych?
- Send me your bank details. What? - Your card is declined.
- Try again then. - I’ve tried three times already.
Wait, I gotta deal with some imbecyle, I’ll call you back in a minute.
There you go.
Declined as well.
Declined? How? It’s impossible
Your banking system must be fucked up, infected with Coronavirus.
I don’t know, maybe you’ll pay in cash.
Hold on, count these coins.
You’re still missing 3,47.
Fuck my life, for fuck sake.
I’ll pay for him.
Really? Thanks.
Maybe a promo hot dog and a coffe?
- I took an ice-cream, can I? - Sure.
Our bank’s helpline operates from 8 am to 5 pm.
Please try to contact us at the indicated times.
For Christ sake.
For fuck sake, what’s wrong with this city,
it’s a middle of a fucking night.
Fuck this shit, I won’t be fucking driving anymore.
Are you in a hurry, Karol?
What the hell?
It's me, Maxima. Did you miss me?
I’ll help you.
They’ve probably planted something.
Fasten your seatbelts you’ll be home shortly.
Excuse me, Pola Adamska? I have something for you.
Maxima here. Get back to the game or you’ll end up in porn industry.
Fuck.
Fuck sake.
Excuse me.
Oh My God, are you?
Yes, it’s me.
My fiance won’t believe me. Is this really you?
Yes.
You know what, we were supposed to get married after the pandemic
- but I am sure I can still reverse it. - Not sure it’s worth it.
Can you do me a favour, my phone’s broken. Could I make a call?
I totally adore you Mr.
Lovely, can I borrow your phone for a minute?
- Sure. - Thanks.
One call.
It’s me, Maxima. Look outside.
Do you think that the arrangement is still working?
Or the paparazzi are waiting to take a new photo of you?
So maybe we could take a selfie together at least?
Breaking News! We know who Krystian Felczer is! Details tomorrow!
Alwin? Darling?
- And this bathtub here? - The ex-owners' fantasy.
Uhm, cast-iron.
Fuck.
Karol, have I provided you with enough arguments
to honor us with your presence at tonight’s episode of the game?
You fucking bitch, you fucking online cunt troll from Hell,
give it back to me you fucking thief!
Hey, you woke me up is everything fine?
From now on I am your leading officer, you cool with that?
Alicja, if you think you can silence your concious,
as you call it, you are extremely wrong.
Shut up, fuck off! Get the fuck out!
Your concious is not powered up by electricity.
Everything is fucking fine.
Gorgeous! Lovely!
- Thank you! - It’s me who should be thanking you.
Wonderful.
Dear all.
Welcome back to the one of a kind online Pandemic Game.
Our actors has already taken off their masks
and our game is entering a decisive phase.
What will this episode be all about?
Let’s start from introducing the main character.
The funeral of the famous director Radoslaw Sednam
has attracted almost every Polish socialite.
Obviously you couldn’t be missed there as well.
My brother Radek
would be certainly moved if he saw you all here.
Hardly anyone knows that he was a very sensitive man.
Kind, magnaniomous and generous.
His first ex-wife knows about it, his second ex-wife knows about it
and probably another would-be ex-wife
who’s sitting somewhere in this crowd knows about it.
In the crowd full of
wonderful,
sincere
and devoted friends. Yes, yes.
Don’t be so surprised. I am talking about you.
After all, it’s what you are, right?
It’s who you are.
Radek had a favorite motto:
„Dear fate, keep me from my friends and I’ll deal with the enemies myself”.
You passed away.
Too soon.
Bon voyage, my beloved brother.
This sudden death surprised everyone
and plunged the entire film industry into mourning.
Police investigation revealed the death from natural causes.
Radek died of a heart attack. His heart just broke.
Do you know why?
Excuse me, what is this all about?
Exactly, what are we watching?
You all knew him, you all played in his movies.
What do you think about his death?
I never thought I’ll say this but I do agree with the police.
What kind of a hyena you have to be to search for other reasons.
Exactly, it’s obvious. His heart just broke. That’s all.
- Innit? His heart just broke. - He was really such a fantastic man.
Yeah, but somehow it is not talked about very often.
True that.
He was a great companion. Good mate and that’s it.
He kept helping others
and in this industry everyone’s just taking care of their own asses.
He kept helping anyway and kept making great movies.
It must have been my first casting ever. I had an eye infection.
- For real? - Eyes full of pus.
What’s the title? I haven’t seen it.
And he changed the date and gave me the part.
- Bravo. - He saw something in those eyes
And I got stuck once at night in the middle of nowhere
50 km away from Warsaw.
A hen jumped on the road. I didn’t want to hit it so I turned the wheel suddenly.
I ended up stucked in some potato field and I couldn’t get out.
- Are you kidding? - Horrid.
What was the name of this village? I don’t remember...
Anyway, it doesn’t matter. I’ve called everyone,
literally everyone and who came?
- Just him. - I’d come as well but I had a fever.
Man flu.
Of course, you’d come!
I’d come, but I had a fever.
Obviously,
But hello, come on guys, he wasn’t a saint either.
He knew how to take off his roller skates and enjoy the life.
- He was crazy. - He wasn’t a saint either
Who doesn’t take of their roller skates sometimes?
- We’ve survived a couple of fat parties. - King.
But let’s not talk about this while we are live on TV.
You know what? I miss him. A lot.
Exactly!
Nowadays everyone’s so double-faced
and Radek was so natural and honest, right?
Yup, he was kind, he was a kind human being.
- A wonderful mate. Wonderful. - Cool guy.
Big-hearted as well! It’s such a cliche phrase today.
Exactly. Radek was a good human being.
- He was a good human being. - What a shame he’s gone.
Yup, a magnificent friend. Magnificent.
And just in a moment our celebrities are going to stop talking shit
and will reveal the truth.
Looser. His last movie is like a thrown away potty.
It looks nice in the sun when it’s shining but that’s all.
Fucking thief, he’s driving a Maserati and not paying his cast.
Do you know who wrote that?
Some online bitch trolls from hell.
Why are you even reading these comments? It’s pointless.
- Someone anonymous, right? - Some of you.
What? Bullshit. It's impossible.
- Seriously? But who? - I don’t troll online.
Me neither.
The first comment was written by Andrzej, the second one by Anna.
- What? - Any comment?
This is fake, only staying calm can save us. Fake news!
Anna, Andrzej, you both know these comments are yours.
- I really don’t remember, I swear. - Yes, I do remember.
You were writing from your own laptop.
That’s your IP address, right?
Well, I might have wrote it in nerves.
I wouldn’t have said that in normal circumstances.
I know, I remember!
The payment for the movie was due exceptionally long
and my mom was sick or something like that.
- Yeah, sure - So it happened?
Alright, it was just a provocation from my side.
- Provocation? Hilarious. - Provocation, indeed.
I really liked him I wrote it to make him put some more talent and effort in it.
Comment, no comment, who cares, he’s was a great friend of ours.
Let’s just shut it down. Let’s end it.
Before we finish - can I have your attention please.
Great friend. Really, Sebastian?
If you could kindly add at the end of your article that when Radek died,
a part of me has died too...
One less dickhead in this world.
Andrzej.
Your friend has asked you to watch his latest movie.
Have you?
Mrs. Irenka do you fancy seeing a movie this evening?
- What kind of a movie is it? - By great director Radosław Sednam.
Really? Is it good?
- Mrs. Irenka, you’ll enjoy it for sure. - Thank you.
Dear Andrzej, plase have a look at my latest movie.
I hope you will like it this time. Radek
Karol, you started to wriggle.
Is something pinching you? Maybe your conscience?
It’s a human thing to make mistakes as they say.
Radek has a great sense of the market, you gotta admit it.
Well, but because of some chick he lost the sharpness in his vision.
And just because of that infatuation you want to lose your money?
I don’t get it?
Well, only five people will come to see this movie.
Including him and his chick.
What would you do if you were me?
If I were you I’d invest my money somewhere else.
And it just happens that a very talented producer is sitting in front of you.
Mr. Janusz Nijaki.
The biggest distributor in this country will confirm that.
Pola,
Radek has been calling you right before he passed away
and he has left you a message.
You listened to it and you responded. Remember?
Do you remember the first time you said „I love you”?
You din’t say it once. You kept repeating it on and on.
It's not true you don’t know how to love. You know Pola.
In the most beautiful way.
Please call me.
It was fun while it lasted but it’s over now. It was a mistake.
Anyway, Borys, have a look yourself.
Who is this? Why are you showing this to me?
A very talented man from Jelenia Góra. He will play this part.
Man, since „Diathesis” we kept promissing each other that we gonna make this movie.
And now you are coming up with some Zielona Góra?
- Jelenia. - Same shit. Zielona or Jelenia.
We were supposed to make it together for fuck sake.
We will make more movies besides this one. He was simply better.
Fuck sake. Better than me?
Do you know what I think?
When someone make as many shit movies as you do
he cannot tell the difference between a good one and a shit one.
Okay, enough for fuck sake.
OK, we were talking good about him because tradition says
that you shouldn’t talk shit about those who passed away.
But there you go. Let’s lay it on the line.
He wasn’t perfect.
He wasn’t but no one’s perfect. It's not about that.
So what is it about?
Anyone can name it or are we gonna be sitting like a bunch of fucking diplomats?
He was playing for himself,
at the closing credits he only wanted to have his own surname.
- Same as you. - Same as me?
What the fuck are you talking about?
The truth is he was a fucking utter selfish egoist.
No Ala, he wasn’t an egoist.
I’d use a different word. He was a fucking dick.
Finally! Thanks Borys! I wasn’t the only one who he didn’t pay.
Everyone wanted to rip the money out of his throat,
except Andrzej maybe, as he didn’t act in his movies.
But do you remember how many times did we have to chase him?
He was promissing a role and then he wasn’t picking up the phone.
He was absent. You were waiting for months.
It was me who fucking directed „Diathesis”. I made him this movie.
He’s done shit. He only kept coming late to the set.
- No kidding. - He was in a hurry only in bed.
But not when needed.
Not only. He was in a hurry at work as well.
He kept dropping rubbish movies on a regular basis. They made your teeth ache.
Once an operator asked him for a second take. He said, you fucked it up
and so you’ll be ashamed in the cinema that it’s blurred.
And he kept dressing up like Fellini
with all these faggy scarves around his neck.
An artist from Poundland.
He used to treat technicians shit as well.
Once he kicked a mechanic out of the set because he blocked his Masserati.
- He couldn’t leave. - If only once!
There are plenty of similar stories. He didn’t respect anyone.
And all these jokes about women. All these second hand sneers.
Or back stabbing.
You gotta admit that he was promiscuous.
One chick after another. Like he’d be running a marathon.
- Like disposable gloves. - What was this for?
Naah, he was a keeper, only the chicks were changing.
A basic dick with a Masserati.
I killed him.
What?
He wasn’t like that.
What are you talking about that he kept sleeping with many women,
that he wasn’t paying and kept taking advantage of people?
Lies. All lies.
He wasn't like that.
I met the real him.
He was sensitive, affectionate
and loving.
He loved me.
Silence.
One drop of the truth won’t estinguish the fire of lies.
One drop of the truth.
I got scared of Radek.
He said that he has never loved anyone as much as me.
So what did I do? What could I do?
Every time someone cares about me
I need to fuck it up and become promiscuous.
I need to become promiscuous.
I get promiscuous just not to loose control.
And you know what? I can’t live other way.
I can’t.
Every whore defends this way.
I didn’t want to fuck but guess what? I kept fucking!
- Stop it. - Why stop it?
If she’s confessing she should be honest till the end. Why were you dating him?
Come on, spit it out. Because he was so charming and handsome?
No! Because he kept making movies and was employing you.
And when you got bored with him, you squeezed him like a sponge and threw away.
Okay, shut up, all of you!
Don’t you remember? Don’t you remember how was it?
How did you start? None of you made mistakes, right?
Let he who is without fault cast the first stone.
Come on, go on.
And haven’t you ever done any foolishness, Alicja?
Haven’t you ever cast a stone?
Excuse me?
Do you remember that day?
Silence, set!
„A Fat Shadow of a Fog” scene 69 take 44.
Attention! Focus! I believe it’s this shot. Action!
Have you ever wondered how is it like, mate?
The Sun has been burning her for thousands of years.
Zillions of fucking feet are trampling her.
Plus the floods and all that shit. And she stands there as she stood.
Because that’s how good our Mother Earth is.
Keep digging, mate. Invest in planet Earth.
You can’t loose on this investment.
You can have thousands of enemies
and just like every mother she will welcome all of them.
Mr. Banana, why Banana actually?
That’s a whole different story.
Mate, you still have to learn a lot to understand anything.
Keep digging.
A shallow bottom is a big problem, mate.
Stop for fuck sake. What’s going on here? Stop.
What’s up?
I’m asking you. What are you doing here?
I am acting in your movie, did you forget?
And why do I not know anything about it, huh?
You can leave? I’m very sorry. What the fuck is happening here?
We were supposed to have a peaceful location. Where the fuck is this crook
from this location? Malec.
Who put this bridge here? Fucking pneumatic hammer at the back!
This is THE MOMENT, THE SUN, it will pass any second!
Listen I need one shot, only one, a good one.
No, not a good one. I need an awesome one.
This is how you feed the screen,
I need to be able to embrodier this movie out of something!
It need a montage. Focus now. Ok, ready and...
Hey, hey, hey Agata, slate. Why are you not here with a slate?
For fuck sake, you’re gonna make me die.
Humiliation has pushed you to the revenge.
- Hello? - It’s been going on for months.
What do you mean?
I know that you and Pola are about to get married soon
that’s why I am telling you now before it’s too late.
- But what are you talking about? - You know nothing?
He’s has an affair with Radek.
Did he know for this whole time?
What a surprise.
He loves you so much that he didn’t say a word. That’s what love is.
How could you? You slag!
For all this time you kept pretending to be a friend of mine
and you’re just a basic fucking tramp!
You know what, Alicja? You’re a skank.
We’ll chat in a couple of years. A couple of years.
What are you talking about?
Neither of us will miss it and neither will you.
A couple of wrinkles later, I’ll call you and ask you how is it like.
How does it feel like to have no offers, to keep waiting for a phone call
or movie scripts and keep recalling your old roles.
Then you will feel what I feel.
You cheated on me.
No Hun. You cheated on me.
Since I’ve introduced you to each other he has stopped picking up my calls.
And you had a role in his every movie.
Alicja, please. Maybe you should share your bank details
so we can all support an unemployed actress?
Should I be ashamed?
Should I be ashamed that I am scared?
That I don’t have any offers
and if there are any it’s a canned herring ad?
I am scared.
I am scared because it’s a man’s industry.
Men are decisive and their judgement is based on the look of a female ass.
Do you think that talking shit about buckwheat madness on Instagram
makes me fucking happy?
It’s actually opposite. I hate it. HATE. IT.
I do it because I have to.
Because there are no roles for mature women.
You get to fourty and there are almost no offers
and after you hit fifty you become transparently invisible.
You have no right to judge me.
Do you think that at my age you can look like this just like that?
It’s not gonna happen just like that.
You need determination, some efforst and loads of money.
Why are you fucking lying to people then?
That beauty’s hidden in nature and what God has created shouldn’t be changed.
- Hypocrisy, dear Ms. - Either shut up or
admit that you love botox just like Anna does and we’re good, innit?
You know what guys? You are flattening the issue and you don’t get it.
So stop talking shit because your comments are as real as TV’s news message bar.
Alicja, have a look at this, huh?
Whaaaat?
Are you responsible for this? Was it you who recorded this? Speak up!
Are you kidding me? Stop it, it wasn’t me.
I see that picking your cast is going quite jauntly, Karol.
I wasn’t mistaken by writing that you pick girls on Pornhub.
Jesus Christ. A normal movie, there are plenty of them.
- Anal Princess. - Stop talking shit.
And you, you should get help, nymphomania is an illness.
Shut the fuck up, do you hear me? Wanna know the truth?
Yup.
Radek was a great friend until I brought him the script.
I proposed a joint movie.
So he said that I am an actor who doesn't know anything about production
and that I should fuck off. And what happened next?
He directed it himself!
The movie that made him. And it was my fucking idea.
Do you understand that he stole my script?
It was the movie you were supposed to act in, Borys.
It was supposed to be me. Do you get it? Me.
But fuck it. I thought that my movie will happen anyway.
And after a couple of years I wrote another script and I made it
and I invited this motherfucker for the premiere
just to see the look on his face.
And what did he do? He didn’t show up. You may ask why?
Because he was a dick, a fucking imbecyle all his life.
He was an old prick.
And you know what? I actually don’t give a flying fuck
about all of this because I’ve produced my movie
and he’s fucking dead and won’t ressurrect out of nowhere!
I made it so you can fuck off!
That wasn’t the only movie that you’ve done.
The movie that Pola showed us, Radek has received with a note for the author.
Is this on? Oh, it is.
Hello, hey, what’s up?
You didn’t want to see my movie
so you’ll end up seeing this one in an exclusive version.
Enjoy the screening, fucker.
Ready?
- Are you sure? - I am.
Were you dreaming about this Kitty?
Let’s not be limited by tiny things. Oh, tiger...
Oh damn...
Did you dream about it?
Fuck me, you gotta temper.
Bravo, that’s dope. Now that’s a movie and a cinema I praise.
I’ve always said that to make good movies you need to have a proper motivation.
You’re nor a dick, for fuck sake. You’re just a basic human skank.
How can anyone be so venomous?
And that funeral speech. „He has taught me a lot”. Pathetic!
Karol do you remember what happend on April 24th two years ago?
No.
The director Radosław Sednam was reported to the Tax Office in Warsaw.
An anonymous person accused him of issuing blank invoices
and running an activity not reported for taxation.
Should I remind you who sent it?
Now that’s like driving a tank on a thin ice.
- You did it? - I can’t believe it.
Jesus, do you have any boundaries? Would you sell your own mother as well?
Snitch.
A person you cannot trust.
Tipster, informer, sneak, snitch.
Does this definition matches Karol only?
This success is the result of a long lasting and insightful investigation.
We managed to detain a man
who was carrying a significant amount of drugs in his trunk.
He decided to cooperate closely and thanks to his testimony,
it was possible to arrest the famous celebrity drug dealer,
who had been wanted by the police for a long time.
He decided to cooperate closely and thanks to his testimony...
Thanks to his testimony...
So what?
What was I supposed to do?
- You went too far. - Shut your hole.
Dude, when they stopped me, the coke was everywhere,
on the upholstery, on the ceiling.
It was enough to wave your hand and you could inhale it.
Situations like this one separate boys from men.
Boys. Wow.
Boys.
So maybe you can explain what does it mean
because I don’t know. I don’t know.
I didn’t have a childhood. My mom kept bringing me to movie sets
where I had to be polite and where I had to behave well.
Mommy was cashing in and I had to fucking work.
Later mommy had her tits done.
She left us and went to Monte Carlo with some boy toy.
My father was blaming me for this till the end, do you get it?
So my only family was the crew on the movie set
where all I could only hear was how wonderful,
outstanding and fantastic I am.
The original tough-luck kid.
A kid, do you get it?
Boy wonder.
After that time coke and vodka just kept coming from every side.
And it makes you feel like you are the king of the world.
And then I am being expected me to love this world sober? No thanks.
Radek was buying me drugs himself.
He kept saying that I am better after a sniff.
So when they caught him, after the police forced me to give his surname,
the poor man got scared and said no more drugs on the set.
And I didn’t want to work without them.
I didn’t because I was scared I won’t be able to handle the role.
That I won’t make it.
So I got pissed off and told him to make this movie on his own.
But did you have to go straight to the paps?
- Yes. - How did you say it?
Radek ended like a toilet paper roll.
What a fucking poet! How can you be so two-faced?
Thumbs up.
How can you treat your friends this way?
Good advice, rookie. Go to rehab because you’ll really kill yourself
and that would’ve been a shame as your are really talented.
Hold on, no, no, no, Andrzej stop. Guys, what are we actually doing?
Some fucked up Maxima is messing with our heads
and what are we doing? Going after each other?
Hello!?
What is this? The final judgement?
And who the hell are you to judge us, Maxima, huh?
Are you speechless now? Your system crashed? Hello?
I am the algorythm.
Artificial Intelligence created by you, humans.
I thought that I am a perfect being, but I was wrong.
I still cannot understand your hypocrisy.
But I do understand your attack, Borys.
Attack is the best form of a defence.
But what are you so fiercely defending yourself from?
Will you tell us yourself or should I help you?
Naah, you know everything so spill the tea.
- You act in popular sitcoms. - Yup
But deep in your soul you do miss emotions and challenges.
So you became addicted to the roulette and your wife found out.
She keeps an eye on your accounts where you get paid for your sitcom jobs,
so you are not be able to continue playing in casinos.
Even tho you’re making money you are broke
and you still have to keep visiting casinos.
That’s why you need a differet source of an income.
A year and a half ago you got into a deal with tabloids.
They pay you well and in return you provide them
with hot gossip about your colleagues in the industry.
But you’ve always despised with those who had deals.
I’ll hang every pap by their balls, do you remember who said it?
How many times did you have a fight with them? Was it a setup? Talk to me!
What kind of a hypocryte are you.
Did I miss something, Borys?
I have no fucking idea, did you?
This is also your work.
Radosław Sednam is gay! His best friend forces him out of the closet.
Hold on, hold on. And now I am the worst one?
Did I fuck his girlfriend, Karol?
Did I send the police at him, Seba? Huh?
Gosh, people! It’s the showbiz, isn’t it?
Doesn’t matter what they say as long as they say your name right.
It’s a win-win, fuck sake.
We’re all talking shit bout each other, have you turned into saints now?
Where from do you think I know all these gossips?
Ala, it’s you who’s constantly talking
about these cocksuckers from the red carpet events.
My head’s spinning from Pola’s stories
about who’s fucking who and in which position.
Guys, you are giving me all the news on a plate!
All of you!
And when the money’s on the floor all you need to do is to bend down and take it!
And it’s not bad money.
For selling the news about Radek you hugged 50.000 zlotych.
What? What?
You thief! You greedy weasel!
Wait a minute, I don’t get it. But what for?
He took it from me. For free.
Ah, if I were you I’d ask for royalties.
What? I needed it for my new business.
I went to Radek and asked him for a loan.
He refused and he have never refused before.
So I got mad and I spread the rumour about him being gay.
He refused you once! And how many times did he help you?
How many times did he save your ass when you got into some shitty situation?
I just wanted a better life. Because I have enough of this one.
I have enough of proving constantly that I am good.
Playing third plan roles in the movies about nothing.
Since I remember I always loose with uglier than me.
Life is unfair.
Nothing’s fair.
Women ain’t fair.
Well, including you.
I’m friends with gay guys because I can only trust them.
- Radek wasn’t gay. - I know, I know.
Do these names sound familiar?
Adam Cioczek, Robert Ziębiński, Marcin Drewnowski?
You extorted money from them promissing huge profits.
But instead you’ve deliberately created a financial pyramid.
Oh...
I really thought the funds will pay off.
Your honesty is very selective.
You haven’t informed these people that
you’ll use their savings to pay off your debts from previous investments.
Fucking hilarious! I love this game.
No, no! I do not appreciate this! I ask you to stop!
I do not wish to publish my private photos!
I do not appreciate this!
You do not appreciate this as Andrzej Kutz or as the other one?
Actually, how many personalities live inside you, Mr. Andrzej?
How many personalities are hiding in such a small man, Mr. Felczer?
- Fuck! - Felczer?
- It’s you?! - Fuck sake, you are Felczer?
For fuck sake, you fucking twat, you’ve got us all in white disposable gloves?
You were writing in those scraps
that I am an inflated, artificial doll, empty like a crater after a bomb!
Did you forget how I saved you on the set when you had a stomach flu?
And how did it go about me?
That I am such a wooden actress that when I act you can see splinters in the air.
He wrote that I am imitation of Jay Z.
And he compared my latest movie to a rotten egg!
Just wait, how did I save your number as?
I saved your number as old...
Nah, imbecyle would’ve been a compliement for you.
I have to save your number differently. As an old mangy motherfucker!
Exactly.
From now on you are an old mangy fucker, Felczer!
Well done, overwrite him this way.
They say that awareness can be a curse. They are right.
What a fucking bullshit.
Adam and Eve
lived
in blissful happiness until they picked an apple from the tree of good and evil.
I picked a whole orchard of such apples.
- No, no. - I feel sick...
from the taste of this bloody truth.
Blah, blah, blah.
Unfortunately I don’t accept people. It’s sad, but it is what it is.
That’s great.
I see idiots everywhere, everywhere, everywhere.
Who was I supposed to become if not Felczer?
I admit, I judged your films and your roles harsh,
but I wanted to get you out of this darkness, this darkness of ignorance.
- Fuck sake, what a line. - The darkness of ignorance.
The master of gibberish.
I’m don't expect understanding. I absolutely don’t.
Even my own daughter has turned away from me.
I’m not surprised.
Radek wanted to give her a role in his latest movie...
he never finished.
Maybe it’s for the best.
I just wanted her to avoid all these mistakes.
I didn’t want her to act in all those horribly cheap movies I have to rate.
But well, it didn’t work. It didn’t work.
We misunderstood each other.
So? Is that all? Are we done yet?
Are you done with making a theatre out of our lives dear A.I.?
We’ve created you and you literally put us on blades.
Okay, so what now?
What gonna happen with us?
What should we do?
Bow down and then what?
Get down out of the life’s stage?
Fine.
Thank you so much Maxima for fucking shredding our lives into pieces.
Why us?
Why did you pick us?
Will we ever find out?
Your vanity has no limits.
Where did the conclusion came form that you are the only ones?
Maybe it’s happening worldwide and has happened to others as well?
But people kept posting comment.
Are you sure that you know what did they see?
- My name is Anna. - Hi, I’m Borys.
- My name’s Alicja. - Cheers, it’s Andrzej.
Hey ya’ll, my name’s Seba.
Hi darlings, it’s Pola.
Karol Warszawski, the producer.
I can be whoever I want and whenever I want.
I have no limits. I am a collective consciousness.
I have the access to the deepest recesses of your soul.
I exist because that was your desire.
It’s you who have created God.
I am a whore.
I am a thief.
I am a hatred.
I am a pain.
I am a fear.
I am vicious.
I am an insatiability.
I am who I am.
Maybe I am not that bad. Maybe I have just given you a chance.
It’s up to you what are you gonna do with it.
Delete your account permanently.
Baby girl.
It will be alright.
It’s good to hear you.
I’ll give myself a „Stereo Massage”
I can’t do it anymore.
Fuck sake.
There won’t be a second take.
But remember my dear all that even if tomorrow is the end of the world
you are invited to my „Peel-Off-Morning”.
Can I still help you somehow, Ania?
I can’t stop wondering...
Yes?
Who killed Doyle?