- ♪
- No...don't--don't do it, don't do it, don't do it!
- He's going to do it! - Don't do it! He did it!
- [audience laughs]
- Why would he do that?
- [audience laughs]
- No, no, don't go in there.
Why you going in there?
Don't go--he finna die, why would he do that?
Dawg!
- [snapping] There's no more coming on the screen.
- I can't--my body can't even move,
I'm so traumsized.
- [audience laughs]
- Traumatized...huh?
Same thing happened to me the first time I saw it.
I didn't eat meat for almost 24 hours.
- [audience laughs] - Nah, nah...
- Which is a long time for an African.
- [audience laughs]
- I was taught to eat the pig from the rudder to the tudder.
- So, how do you feel now?
- I feel like...[dry heaves].
- [audience laughs]
- I feel like I wanna throw up that eight strips of bacon
that I ate this morning.
- [audience laughs]
- "What the Well-ness," it does it to everybody
that watches it.
- I don't think I'm ever gon' eat meat again.
- EFE: Oh, no, no, no, you have to take it slowly.
I would suggest you move slowly away from meat.
- Nah, nah, mm-mm,
I--I'm never eating meat as long as I live.
- No? - Nah-um, not me.
- So, you're becoming a vegetarian?
- What kind of freak-- what kind of stuff you into?
- [audience laughs]
- A vegetarian is somebody that doesn't eat meat.
- Oh! - [audience laughs]
- A pescatarian is somebody that consumes fish,
and a flexitarian is somebody that has a vegetable diet,
but occasionally eats meat or fish.
- Oh, okay, well so--
oh, so I'm a Christian, so I must be an evangelitarian.
- [audience laughs]
- You'll definitely eat meat again.
- Nah, I'm not-- I'm not eating no more meat.
- Eh! - Uh-uh.
- EFE: Eh! - No.
- Eh! - Uh-uh.
- [audience laughs]
- Care to place a little wager that you're not done with meat?
- Okay, I bet you a hundred dollars
I'm never eating meat again.
- Uh-huh! - Ah-an!
- Um. - Uh-uh.
- You have to shake my hand for the wager!
- [audience laughs]
- ♪
- ♪ No matter what you do, I love you ♪
♪ No matter where you go, I'm behind you for sure ♪
♪ Always remember, love will never walk ♪
♪ We'll make it if we stay together ♪
- ♪
- [screams] Cora, what you doing?
Get that out--you not finna die on my watch, Cora.
- [audience laughs]
- You not finna die on my-- you not gon' do it.
- Mr. Brown, what is wrong with you,
you better get that food up off that floor?
Have you lost your mind?
- No, Cora, I was lost, but now I'm found.
I was blind, but now I see...
this good ol' delicious piece of...
- [audience laughs] - Don't think about it...
eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it.
- No!
- [audience laughs]
- Efe, do you know what's gotten into Mr. Brown?
- Yes, "What the Well-ness."
- What the what?
- [audience laughs]
- "What the Well-ness" is a film by the Espino brothers
about the--the horrors of meat packaging in America.
- Well, I'll tell you what... whatever that movie is,
it's taking effect on him, he hadn't eaten that bacon.
- Yeah, it has that effect on everybody who watches it.
- Hm.
- [audience laughs]
- [whines] No!
- [audience laughs] - [shrieks]
[guttural cry]
- What--?
- [guttural cry]
- CORA: What is he-- - I smoked the whole thang.
- [audience laughs]
- No!
- [laughs] [unintelligible], eh, welcome back.
- [audience laughs]
- No more bacon, no!
- Mr. Brown, now you eat, like, three packages of bacon
a week yourself.
- ♪ I...know I been changed
♪ Angels in Heaven don' signed I-- ♪
- All right, Mr. Brown, all right, that was--
- ♪ The angels in Heaven don' signed my name ♪
- So, Mr. Brown, what you telling me,
you not gon' eat bacon anymore?
- He will be eating meat in two or three days tops.
- [audience laughs]
- I'm sure he will, but I tell you what,
that movie has really got him going.
- Everyone that watches it goes overboard.
- Oh. - Then they start eating meat
as if they've never seen it before.
- MR. BROWN: Not--not--not me.
No, Efe, I'm a changed man, mm-hm,
and Cora, you need to stop eating that meat,
and you a Christian,
so you should be an evangelitarian.
- [audience laughs] - What, Mr. Brown?
The Lord say everything He maketh is good and clean.
You know what, I'm gon' eat whatever I please,
as long as I bless it.
- Cora, you know the Lord ain't down with no swine.
- [audience laughs]
- Well, the Bible say, whatever a man eats
goes into his stomach, not into his heart,
but whatever comes out of a man is what defiles him.
- Cora, you--you off here preaching to me,
whatever defiled-- I'm a deacon, too,
I know the Word, you ain't the only one know the Word.
Well, you ain't been to Bible study in a while, Deacon.
- [audience laughs] - Oh, I--I been going to virtual
church...on the internet.
- Virtual church.
- Yeah, and Cora, I don' been through too much
to let food kill me, I'm not doing it.
- [laughs]
- MR. BROWN: Not gon' do it. - Efe, you know what,
Mr. Brown eats meat more than anybody I know,
but I tell you what, if that movie stopped him,
maybe I should watch it. - You should.
He--he--he insisted on becoming a vegetarian
immediately after seeing the movie,
which is not the most healthiest of decisions.
- Oh, okay. - No.
- [audience laughs]
- Cora! - Mr. Brown!
- Cora! - Oh, Lord, Mr. Brown!
Mr. Brown...wait...
- [audience laughs]
- He still has a strong pulse.
- I know what will get him up. - What--what's gon' get him up?
- [audience laughs]
- [screams]
- CORA: Mr. Brown... - MR. BROWN: I want a bite.
- [audience laughs]
- What happened? - CORA: Mr. Brown,
you--you--you fainted, I mean, you passed out.
- I feel Disney.
- [audience laughs]
- You feel Disney?
- CORA: Mr--Mr. Brown, now how long has--
how long has it been since you've eaten meat?
- This--last night.
- [audience laughs]
- BOTH: What!
- That is record time.
Normally, people get sick after week two or week three
for not eating meat...12 hours.
How much meat do you eat anyway?
- Mr. Brown, you know what,
I'm about to go to the store and get some groceries
for everybody around here to fix breakfast.
- Okay, Cora, I'm going too
'cuz some thangs is gon' change around here.
[crying] Cora, you don't know what that pig had to go through
to get on that plate.
He died that other people could live.
- You know what, okay, you can go with me,
but let me tell you something, you can't be telling me
what I can put in my basket or what not to put in my basket.
- Okay, you just can't put no meat in there.
- Yeah, I can put whatever I wanna put in there.
- Cora, you ate no mo' meat. - You better come on here.
- No more meat! - CORA: Don't be trying
to tell me what do to do. - MR. BROWN: I got the beef.
- ♪
- Hey, uh, Sandra, where's Phillip?
- Oh, he's in the room, online gaming.
Oh, okay, well, go get your brother,
and tell him to come down here,
it's time for him to be a man [laughs].
- What are y'all about to do to him?
- We're about to teach him the wonderful game of poker.
- Okay, but how is that going to make him a man?
- [laughs] - I mean, poker's just a game,
and women are good at it, too.
- [laughs]
- What's so funny?
- Did you hear what she said? - Right.
- She said, "Women are good at it, too."
- [laughs]
- And what makes y'all think that poker's a man's game?
- Well, it's a game of patience and fearlessness,
and, uh, controlling your emotions.
- Obviously, you mad already.
- [laughs]
- Okay, yeah I am upset
because men always think they're better than women.
- VINNY: Look, let me run it down to you,
okay, you got basketball, you got football,
you got hockey, you got soccer,
and then fishing, and then poker [laughs].
- SANDRA: Okay, but you don't know
because I could be better at poker than the both of you.
- I been playing poker since your daddy was a thought,
there's no way you could play to this level right here.
- REGINALD: There are factors, like, knowing when to bluff,
knowing how to bluff--
- Look, look, look, look, look, look, look,
there's no way she's gon' know what we know
until she's been playing for a long time.
I mean, it's a fact, I'm serious now,
poker is a man's game, period, okay, little girl?
Now, go get your brother,
so we can teach him how to be a man.
- [chuckles]
- You know what, I think I get it now.
- Good.
- ♪
- VINNY: Oh yeah, yeah, okay, all right, that's good.
Hey, um, where's Phillip?
- Still online gaming.
See, he never wants to play poker, but I do.
- We already explained to you that men--
- [audience laughs]
- REGINALD: Oh! - Oh, okay, see first of all,
you gotta learn how to play the game
before you just put money down [laughs].
- It's all right.
- Oh, I know how to play.
- Okay then, let's go.
All right now, don't get mad
when Granddad take your little $100.
[mimics Sandra] Granddad, can I have my hundred back?
[laughs]
- All right, cut 'em up.
- VINNY: Yeah, you ain't getting it back now, all right.
Woo, she cut... look at that, all right.
- She means business [laughs].
- [audience laughs]
- Okay...Texas Hold 'Em.
- VINNY: She about that hundred dollars [chuckles].
- Alrighty.
- VINNY: Yeah, come on now, see what you got,
see what you know.
- That's to me.
- Ah, that's me, how 'bout that, yeah?
- Okay. - We all in, look at all of us.
- I raise.
- I see your little bet you got, and I see you and I raise you.
- To me, okay, call.
- There you are...oh my god.
- And I raise again.
- She raising again, look at that, all right now.
There--there you go, boom, right there.
- I--I will call.
Last card.
- VINNY: Oh! - REGINALD: Woo!
- I'm all in.
- REGINALD: Yeah, you know what that means now,
that's--that's all your money?
- I said what I said.
- [audience laughs]
- I fold.
- I'll be damned. - What?
- See that right there... that's called a bluff,
something more experienced players would know all about.
- [audience laughs]
- Another game anyone?
- ♪
- Is everything all right, Mr. Brown?
- Mm-hm, fine, been I never better.
- You better eat some real food soon,
or--or you'll pass out again.
- Oh! - What?
- My hands look like chicken fingers.
- [audience laughs]
- Hallucination...stage two.
He's going to break soon.
- CORA: Mr. Brown, if you like this tomorrow,
I--I--I'ma have to force feed you.
- [audience laughs]
- Let me clean up these leftovers.
- Oh, no, no, no, I--I--we got it.
We'll--we'll do it.
- Okay. - Yes, you go on, we have it.
- Thank you. - [laughs]
- Take care of him. - Of course.
Aah! - What's the matter?
- [grunts] My back is pain.
- To--too much meat?
- EFE: Yes! Yeah, yes,
so--so can you help me carry this, uh--uh, leftovers,
and put it away... - [audience laughs]
- Yourself?
- Brown can do it.
- Oh, oh, very good.
Ow, thank you.
- Brown can do it.
- Yeah, thank you.
- [audience laughs]
[audience laughs]
- Oh!
That sauce that--
Uh-uh, I'm not gon' do it.
I'm not gon' do it!
I got ferris willpower.
- [audience laughs]
- I'm not gon' do it.
- FEMALE VOICE: Mr. Brooooown...
- [audience laughs]
- Who is that?
- FEMALE VOICE: It's me, I'm right here, silly.
- [audience laughs]
- Are you invisible?
- FEMALE VOICE: [giggles] No, baby,
I'm right here on the counter.
- Is that the meat?
- FEMALE VOICE: Yes, I've missed you, Mr. Brown.
- [audience laughs]
- I've missed you, too.
- [audience laughs]
- FEMALE VOICE: Prove it to me.
- How you want me to prove it?
- FEMALE VOICE: You can start by coming closer.
- [audience laughs]
- Oh, is this close enough?
- FEMALE VOICE: Come closer to me, now!
- [audience laughing]
- Is that close enough right there?
- FEMALE VOICE: Take the foil off,
I want you to see me.
- You gon' be naked.
- [audience laughs]
- FEMALE VOICE: How do I look, Mr. Brown?
- Oh, you look so good!
- [audience laughs]
- Oh, you look so-- what you want me to do now?
- FEMALE VOICE: Taste me.
- [audience laughs]
- Taste you?
You want me to bite you?
- [audience laughs]
- Oh!
[smacking] Oh!
- FEMALE VOICE: How do I taste, Mr. Brown?
- Girl, you taste so good.
- [audience laughs]
- Oh, thank you.
- FEMALE VOICE: Take me now!
- I'm taking you now.
Oh!
- [audience laughs]
- Give me the meat. [smacking]
[grunting]
- [audience laughs]
- ♪
- [audience laughs]
- Oh, Mr. Brown, oh, Mr. Brown...
Mr. Brown, wake up, wake up, Mr. Brown, Mr. Brown!
Oh my-- - [audience laughs]
- This is the best way I could have woken up today [laughs].
- Efe, this is not funny, help me lift him up.
- [laughs] I would love to, but I'm too weak.
Plus, there's no way we can move him anyway.
- What do you mean?
- [audience laughs]
- Dead weight... classic food coma.
- Come--come on, Efe, help me to get--get him up.
- Okay, all right, wait, I have an idea.
- Okay, wh--what, what, what?
You think that's-- - [screams]
- Welcome back!
- [audience laughs]
- Cora... - CORA: Mr. Brown...
- My belly 'bout to bust, I'm so full.
I think my--my stretch marks is stretching.
- Mr. Brown, you know what, all that food you don' ate,
you can help clean up this mess.
- Cora, it wasn't me. - It wasn't you?
- It was the meat. She was calling me, Cora.
- What are you talking about? - Wait, she?
- She.
- The meat? - The meat.
- Mr. Brown, you know what, you can help me,
get up, come on, get up.
- EFE: Wait, wait, wait, did-- did you give the meat a sex?
- [audience laughs] - Something like that.
- Oh my god, I don't want to get into it.
No, go, go, come on, get up.
- [grunts]
Look at all this mess you gotten.
- So, what about my payment?
Will it be deducted from my housing,
or will it be cash, or bank wire, eh?
- Why you don't have to rub it in,
I know you won fair and square.
- What, what are y'all talking about?
- Just take it out of next month's rent.
- What!?
- I'm joking, you don't owe me anything, huh?
In fact, I think I should be paying you
for the entertainment [laughs].
- CORA: You know what, you better clean up
this mess, Mr. Brown. Come on, let's go get you cleaned up.
- Cora, Cora, the meat was calling me,
you know what it said? - What it say, Mr. Brown?
- Bite me.
- ♪
- Look, man, we suppose to be working together
to take her out.
- [audience laughs]
- I don't know, she's pretty good.
- Pretty good nothing, man, we suppose to be using
classic poker intimidation to get up inside her head, man.
- [audience laughs]
- I'm following. - No, you not following.
Look, I can talk off-- we can get all up in her head.
I've been getting up in men's heads for years, man.
I talked a dude out of his own house at the poker table.
Man, she's a little girl, she ain't nothing,
we can do this.
- [audience laughs]
- Y'all ready?
- Well, you ain't gon be able to hear what's going on
with all that on. - [audience laughs]
- Oh, no, no, no, see I'm a better visual poker player.
- [audience laughs]
- Music just puts me in the right mindset.
- [audience laughs]
- I play Deja Money start to finish.
- Here you go.
I'm sick of you, nah really, I'm sick of you.
- [audience laughs]
- Huh!
I ain't gon' be nice, I'm not gon' be nice.
- [audience laughs]
- You looking for niceness, you ain't gon' find it.
- [audience laughs]
- Sorry, were you saying something?
- [audience laughs]
- ♪
- [audience laughs]
- ♪
- [audience laughs]
- All right, ha, I...am all in.
- I call.
- [audience laughs]
- Well, I fold,
that was a snap call, I know what that is.
Ah, damn!
- [audience laughs]
- I'm done, that's all, she's gotten me.
- [audience laughs]
- [laughs] Taking off some gear, huh,
you must be...losing [laughs].
Losing [laughs]!
- Oh, no, no, no, I just wanted to see your face clearly,
I mean, I thought you was suppose to be
this macho poker player who was taking
my money so easily,
but I see now, you're subpar player at best.
- [audience laughs] - [clears throat]
- [chuckles] You don't talk to me like that, girl.
- [audience laughs]
- I call.
- Damn!
- [giggles]
- VINNY: Gawd damn, damn!
- Bad decision, Mr. Expert Poker Player.
Who taught you how to play?
- My grandfather, Murl, and his twin brother, Earl,
taught me how to play.
Look, don't be trying to get all up in my head.
I'm the head getter up into-er, okay?
Shoo, I'm the one who gets in people's heads.
Trying to get in my head.
- [audience laughs]
- Just admit that women are equally as good or better,
and you can have all your winnings back from yesterday.
- No, I can win all my winnings back today.
- [chuckles] - VINNY: Is what I can do.
- Okay, bring it.
- It's gon' be brought.
- Okay.
- [audience laughs]
- [laughs] - [Unintelligible],
I'm speaking all in,
how 'bout that, that's what I'm speaking.
- Okay...well I call.
- [audience laughs]
- See, I would say good game,
but...it wasn't.
- [audience laughs]
- I literally tried everything, but I can't beat you.
- That was part of my strategy.
- [audience laughs]
- You got some poker talent. - Whatever.
- [audience laughs]
- It--it is what it is there, you know?
- Man, okay then, well, you know,
women are good at poker.
- [audience laughs]
- VINNY: But they-they're not as good as men.
Okay, that was a joke.
- [laughs]
- Come on, I'm sorry, it's a good game,
it was a good game.
Can I borrow a hundred?
- [audience laughs]
- ♪
- [laughs] - I deserve this.
- I wiped the floor with you.
- Yes, you did, you did, you really did, yeah,
it's no way to treat your great-grandparents--
- Hey! - Hey, Burnt Biscuit,
I heard you 'bout ate yourself to death today [laughs].
- And I heard you got beat by a girl...twice today, ha, ha.
- It was more than twice. - Whatever, nah, you know,
what is this movie that everybody talking about
suppose to make you stop eating meat?
- It's called, "What the Well-ness,"
I'ma--I'ma turn it on, let y'all see it.
- Okay, let's see it, yeah.
- Oh, I've been wanting to watch that.
- MR. BROWN: Mm-hm, oh look, watch this.
Oh, it's scary, after y'all get through watching it,
and I'm gon' be the one taking bets.
Check it out. - Ugh!
- MR. BROWN: Oh! - Ugh!
- VINNY: Oh lord. - Oh!
- Ugh!
- Look at its--
- Oh, a chicken like that, oh.
- MR. BROWN: Oh, lord. - VINNY: Oh man, dang.
- I think I'm gon' be sick again.
- Me, too. - Ugh!
- BOTH: [vomit] - Oh!
- ♪
- Oh that is--ugh!
- ♪