- It's time for y'all to get y'all's asses up
and go to school, you're gonna have a great day.
- Oh, how I love it here. Miss Scarlett, wait for me!
- Did you hear from Cora? - No.
- Maybe you should give her a call.
- Uh, I don't wanna look too desperate.
- Hate to break it to you, but we are--
Lord, please let them say yes--beyond desperate.
- You ain't never held a tool in your life, boy.
These is tools that men use.
The only thing you know how to push is a pencil.
- What are we gonna do? - Pray for a miracle.
Until then, this is a wrench. [laughs]
- ♪
- Baby.
- What--what is that?
- What?
- What are you wearing?
- What?
- It's a hazmat suit.
I know what it is, but why do you need it?
- I was trying to clean out the septic tank.
- Jeremy, do you know what you're doing?
- Hell no.
- Yes, I do.
- [chuckles]
- Okay.
- Boy, how do you know how to do that?
- YouTube, hello?
- Boy, you about to kill yourself.
Hello?
- Baby, we should wait for the professionals.
- And who the hell gonna pay for that?
- Exactly.
- Tell me exactly what you gonna do.
- I'm gonna take this snake--
- Mm-hmm. - --I'm gonna put it in there,
I'm gonna stir it up like that. - Okay.
- Pull it back and forth. - Oh.
- I'm gonna get rid of all the doo-doo.
- Is it that simple?
- Yes.
- Okay, well, then that sounds easy enough.
- It is.
- Except for one thing.
- And what's that?
- Do you even know how to open a septic tank?
- Yeah.
You twist it off.
- He don't know what the hell he doing.
Tell me how you open it.
- Man, it's just a septic tank.
Relax.
- Look, dumbass, you ever heard of septic gases?
- Yeah, yeah, you have those all the time.
- Let me tell you something, boy.
You open that tank the wrong way, the cap is gonna blow off.
- And it won't be no worse than when you walking through a room
where you crop dust us with all your gas.
- Well, apparently ain't working.
You still alive.
- Yes, I am.
- Not for long.
- Fine, I got this.
Pbbt, hmm.
- That's exactly you gonna do.
Psst. Go on, psst.
- Baby. - [chuckles]
Blow up, psst. [laughs]
- Is it really that bad?
- Yes.
That gas gonna blow his ass to little bitty pieces.
Especially if he got gas.
The old gas meet the new gas will tear his ass up.
- Baby!
Maybe--maybe we should call somebody!
- Oh, don't you go out there.
- Oh.
- He 'bout to be covered in it.
- Uh!
- ♪
♪ No matter what you do, I love you ♪
♪ No matter where you go, I'm behind you for sure ♪
♪ Always remember, blood ain't never water ♪
♪ We'll make it if we stay together ♪♪
- What is he doing now?
- About to kill his damn self.
- Oh, this is not good.
You think you ought to go stop him?
- Hell no.
Girl, I got old bones.
They might shatter.
Very easy.
- Well...
- You go and stop him.
- No, I'm good.
- Hm.
Do you love him?
That's your husband.
- Yes, I do.
- Do you have insurance?
- Yes, Grandpa.
I think he'll be fine.
- He can't get that cap off, so it's all good.
- Grandpa, I wanna talk to you.
- Aw, shit.
- Stop it.
It's not that bad.
- Oh, I know what you gonna do.
You think he gonna die, so you gonna try
to get up on a new man. [laughs]
- Stop.
Grandpa, ain't nothing about you new.
- BOTH: [laughing]
- So I think that we need to get some help here.
- Is this about them two thieves?
Brown and Cora?
- Yes.
Well, I mean--
- Did they call you back?
- No, they didn't.
- Well then.
- But if they do--
- They ain't.
They's thieves.
- No, Grandpa, she said she would.
- And you believe her ass?
- Why would she lie to me? Hmm?
- Hell, all Christians lie.
She ain't call you back.
- She will, Grandpa.
- You sure about that?
- Yes, I mean, I really wanna have them brought on.
But I think the way that you handled that
with Mr. Brown is a problem.
- I ain't got no problem with Mr. Brown.
I just don't like his ass.
- That was the problem.
And, yes, you do.
- He ain't got that kind of money.
You see that clown.
- How you know?
- How a monkey ass dressing like that gonna have $40,000?
- If they call back-- - VINNY: Uh-huh.
- --will you just let it be?
- Okay, alright. Fine.
- Okay. - VINNY: Alright.
Where you going?
- To call Cora.
- You better be going to call an ambulance.
- Why?
- [sniffs] Smell like your husband just got that cap off.
Don't you smell that sulfur?
- [sniffs]
- Oh, that ain't sulfur, girl.
That is shiiiit.
- Oh no. - That's pee-pee and bedpan.
- This isn't gonna be good, is it?
- Nope, this is not gonna be good.
- [doorbell rings]
- Hey, Mom.
- Hey!
How was your first day?
- It was okay.
- Uh, how 'bout you, Sandra?
- I love it here.
- What?
- Yeah, this is gonna be so much fun.
- Uh, w-w-what?
- Yeah.
- It was that good?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
- Look, I need to go do my homework.
I want everything to be perfect for tomorrow.
- Yeah. O-okay.
- You know what?
- What?
- She on that shiiit.
- Grandpa Vinny, will you stop it?
- No, no, no, the girl left here so mad today.
All of a sudden, she come back, "Ooh, I love it here.
Gotta go do homework."
- No, it is strange.
- Hm.
It's that dope.
- Hey, stop it, okay?
- Why don't we ask your son? You think I'm lying.
- Well-- - Philip, hush.
- Okay.
- Why did Sandra enjoy school so much today?
- Maybe somebody complimented her on her clown shoes?
I don't know.
- Did you see her at all? - Nope.
- Hmm.
Well, did you enjoy school?
- Not as much as her, but she's just been smiling all day.
- Hmm.
- I wonder what that is.
- That's that shiiit.
- You didn't see anything strange, Son, did you? No?
- Well, I did when I walked in.
- What?
- What is Dad wearing?
And what is he doing?
- I need you to go get washed up for dinner.
- With what water?
- Philip. - Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
- [sniffs] Can you smell that?
- [phone ringing]
- Uh, your phone is ringing.
- Hello?
Hey, hey.
Cora.
Yes.
Oh, you are?
Yes. Yes.
Okay. Yeah, we're here.
Yes, please.
Okay, I'll--I'll see you then.
Hey!
- Well, what the hell she say? - [laughs]
She said they are on their way. - What?
- Mm-hmm. Yep.
- So, uh, she didn't ignore ya, huh?
- Nope, she did not.
Hm. - Well now--
- What?
- We'll see.
We will see.
- We see that you 'bout to be in business with a partner.
Hey!
- If I don't kill him first. Hey!
Watch that, Cora.
[laughs]
- [explosion blasts]
- Aw hell.
- What was that? - That was an explosion.
- Oh no!
Oh!
- What the hell?
Alright, the boy just ruptured the line.
- Oh, is it getting all over him?
- VINNY: Oh my God, it's all over him!
- Ahh!
- What the hell are you doing?
- Opening the door! - Don't open the door
and let his stank ass in here!
- Grandpa! Ahh!
- Oh my God!
Run, fool!
Get in all that doo-doo!
Old doo-doo! Fat man doo-doo!
No, no, no, no, don't let him in here!
Aw, hell no.
Ahh!
Alright, uh-uh.
Don't let him in. - What?
- Don't let his ass in here. - Why not?
- ♪
- Grandpa Vinny.
- No! No.
No, hell no.
- Let him in! - No.
We can't let him in.
- JEREMY: Let me in.
- For what? So you can kill us all?
- JEREMEY: I need to get this shit off of me.
- Boy, there ain't no water in here.
- JEREMY: I need to wash up.
- What you need to do is go down to the creek and jump in.
- JEREMY: Are you serious? - Yes!
- Will you move? - Hell no!
- Grandpa! - No!
Listen, think about it. - What?
- He is covered in waste from head to toe.
- [groans]
- Talking about doo-doo
from 1936. - Ahhh!
- That's defecation and debauchery.
- Oh no!
- I'm talking about bedpan juice all over his body.
You can't let him in here!
That's a lot of prune juice, girl.
- JEREMY: [mumbling] I'm gonna be sick.
- Ha! Don't do it, boy.
- Grandpa Vinny, how far is the creek?
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
The creek is about a half a mile.
- JEREMY: [frantic muffled speech]
- You can walk.
- Baby, you need to go to the creek.
- JEREMY: Baby, don't do this to me.
Are you serious? - Yes.
- You're not gonna let me in?
- I don't think it's for the best.
- Baby, really?
- I'm sorry!
- I thought we was Rose and Jack on the Titanic.
- But he wasn't full of shit!
[crying] I'm sorry, baby.
I'm so sorry, I'm sorry.
- You're sorry? That's all you can say?
- I love you.
- Baby, open the door.
- Baby!
Go to the creek!
You better hurry up!
- You're not gonna help me?
- How can I help you?
- By killing us.
That's what you'll do if you get in here.
- Baby, the creek!
- Look, the longer you wait, the worse it's gonna be.
You don't want that stuff to dry up on you.
It dries up, it gets all hard and everything, boy.
- Oh!
- We can't--we can't do this no more.
We left it there.
- I love you, baby.
I love you!
I love you so much.
I love you! I love you!
I love you! - Creek!
To the creek!
- [banging on door]
- To the creek, son!
Take small, shallow breaths.
[sucking air]
Hold your breath if you can!
Don't get that shit in your throat!
- This is not right. - Yes, it is.
- It's not right. - [banging on door]
- It's not! - It is right!
- [crying]
- He finally left.
Did you wanna clean that up?
- No.
- Okay then. We did the right thing.
- Mom?
- Yes?
- Can I go to study hall?
- What?
- Well, there's a study hall after class, and I want to go.
- Uh...
You want to go to study hall?
- Mm-hmm.
- Voluntarily?
- Yes.
- Oh, uh...
- What?
- Talk--what's going on?
- I don't know what you mean.
- Why are you so excited about going to study hall
all of the sudden?
- I like to learn.
- Mm-hmm.
- Listen, you were right.
I just needed to give this place a chance.
- Oh, I'm glad you see it that way.
- I do. So can I go?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Great. Thanks, Mom.
I love you. I love you so much.
- What the hell?
What is that?
- That's that shiiit.
- Stop, okay?
- You don't think that's strange?
- I think that I'm glad she's happy.
- Yo, Mom?
- Yes?
- What's for dinner?
- Chicken and beets.
- Beets?
Don't tell me you're feeding us like the old people, too.
- Stop it. - PHILIP: Okay.
- I'm feeding you healthy.
- Look, I have time.
I'm too young to just die.
You don't have to do that.
- Boy, will you stop it?
- Fine.
- And school was just fine for you?
- Yeah. - That's it? Just fine?
- Yeah.
- Okay, and, um--
- Why do you keep asking?
- So, your sister is acting kinda strange,
so is--is everything fine for her?
I mean, she liking school and that's weird.
So, something's going on, you'll let me know, hmm?
- I'm not no snitch.
- I got, um, some more chicken and fries.
- I'll tell ya everything.
- My boy.
Okay, great.
- [doorbell rings]
- Miss Cora? - Hi!
- VINNY: [groans] - [laughs]
- Mm.
- It's just Cora, it's just Cora.
- Okay. Where's Mr. Brown?
- Oh, he's coming, he's coming. But he got stuck at the light.
He's right behind me. He's coming in though.
- Okay. - Alright.
- That is a nice dress.
- Well, thank you. This old thing?
- I love that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yo, wait a minute. Whatever, whatever, are y'all in or out?
- Grandpa, please.
- Look, I ain't got all day.
Hell, I'm old. Shit.
- We are waiting for Mr. Brown.
- And you gotta stop all that cussing.
- I don't know what's wrong with him.
- It's okay. - He has no couth, no class.
We working on him.
So...what'd y'all decide?
- We're waiting for Mr. Brown.
- I know, I'm so sorry. - [laughs]
- He is rubbing off on me. - He is, he is.
- CORA: Mm. - It's alright.
- MR. BROWN: Cora! Cora! Cora!
Lock the doors, lock the doors!
- What is it, Mr. Brown? - Cora, it's out there!
- What's there? - Cora, I saw it!
- You saw what?
- Cora, it was--it was a big old man,
he was walking like a natural man.
- What? - Cora, it was out there!
It was big and it was brown, and it smelled like sewage.
- What was out there?
- Cora, I don't know what it was!
He just kept chasing me, and he was calling my name!
- Calling your name? - MR. BROWN: Yes.
- What--what? - It was awful, Cora.
It smelled like--
- Like--like what?
- It smelled like--like him!
- Would you stop it, Mr. Brown?
- No, Cora! - What?
- Wait, wait, let me explain.
- Nah, you ain't gotta explain nothing to me.
- CORA: Oh. - Y'all trying to get us
to invest in a haunted house, and I'm--I'm not finna do it.
- Mr. Brown? - Nah, Cora.
Cora, it was awful.
It was ugly, it was like looking in a--
- Looking in the mirror.
- Nah, it was like looking at your mama.
- You don't even know your mama.
- Nah. - Oh hell, boy, that's it.
That's it. No.
- Hold on, Grandpa Vinny, please.
- Would you two-- - No!
- Would you two please stop it?
Ooh, now look, if we gonna be in business together,
y'all gotta stop all this fussing and cussing!
- In business? - Yes.
- Yah! We gonna be in business together?
- Yes, we gonna do it. - Ah-ha!
That's wonderful!
So, you gonna do it? - Yes, we are.
- Oh that's so wonderful! Ah!
Oh, thank you so much!
- ♪
- Cora, I'm not doing nothing with no monster out there.
- Let me explain. - Okay.
- That's Jeremy.
- Oh, so y'all naming the monster?
So y'all already knew--y'all telling us y'all already knew.
Cora, it's a conspiracy.
They trying to get our money.
- No, no.
He was cleaning the septic tank, okay?
- Oh, okay. - Yes.
And it exploded on him.
- It exploded on him? - Yeah.
- Oh no!
- What?
- I think I ran over him.
- What? - You what?
- I ran over him.
- You did what?
- I ran over him.
- What are you saying?
- I think I ran over him.
- Are you serious, Mr. Brown?
- I'm serious. I think I ran over him.
- Got to be kidding me.
- I was scared.
'Cause, see, he came to me, and he said, "Uh!"
When I be scared, my foot go like that, and I buh, wrrah!
And I hit it.
And he said, "Uh." - Mr. Brown.
- And I felt bubu-bu-buh-bu.
And he--he hit the windshield, and he slid down.
And then I heard, "Errrr."
- Mr. Brown, no. - Yeah.
- You hit him?
- No, no, no.
I ran over him.
- Mister--
- There is a difference.
- You ran over him twice and backed up?
- I wanted to make sure he wasn't gonna get us.
- Mr. Brown. - I'm looking after us!
It ain't about you, it ain't about you, it's about us!
We in business!
That monster could have kept us from being in business.
- That is not a monster!
That's my husband!
- You don't seem too concerned about him.
You still right here.
- Mr. Brown!
- She got insurance though?
- We got good insurance.
- If you love him, you would have been gone.
And you still standing there.
- I am in shock.
- Now you thinking, "What's love got to do with it?"
I know what you thinking.
- She ain't charge, she won't touch his stank ass.
- Watch your mouth!
- He is a stank ass.
- I'm gonna pray the Lord shut up your tongue
if you keep cussing.
- He already shut up his hand.
- ♪