1 00:00:00,734 --> 00:00:01,969 (church bell rings) 2 00:00:01,969 --> 00:00:05,606 - Patrick, please talk to me. 3 00:00:06,940 --> 00:00:08,909 - Couvade syndrome actually happens in about 25% 4 00:00:08,909 --> 00:00:10,644 of men with pregnant partners. 5 00:00:10,644 --> 00:00:11,745 So you're not alone. 6 00:00:11,745 --> 00:00:13,113 - Good to know. 7 00:00:13,113 --> 00:00:14,781 - I don't hear from you for two months 8 00:00:14,781 --> 00:00:17,851 and all of a sudden you show up interrupting a meeting. 9 00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:19,086 I thought you were relapsing. 10 00:00:19,086 --> 00:00:20,587 - I was sober the whole time. 11 00:00:20,587 --> 00:00:22,956 - Call, text, this is not the way you talk to me. 12 00:00:22,956 --> 00:00:25,492 - Grand gestures work all the time in the movies. 13 00:00:25,492 --> 00:00:28,262 Everyone would've cheered and clapped. 14 00:00:28,262 --> 00:00:31,465 - I liked you Max, but I thought you were with Maggie. 15 00:00:31,465 --> 00:00:33,133 So I moved on. 16 00:00:33,133 --> 00:00:33,934 - [Max] Oh. 17 00:00:35,502 --> 00:00:38,038 - Sometimes I feel like I'm the minority trifecta. 18 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:39,806 I'm black, disabled and gay. 19 00:00:41,008 --> 00:00:42,776 If people aren't making assumptions 20 00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:44,611 about one part of my life, they're making it about the next. 21 00:00:44,611 --> 00:00:46,113 And I needed to trust people in my life. 22 00:00:46,113 --> 00:00:46,947 And I can't trust you, Max. 23 00:00:46,947 --> 00:00:48,715 - You can trust me. 24 00:00:48,715 --> 00:00:49,950 I promise. 25 00:00:51,184 --> 00:00:54,621 And I am so sorry I hurt you because I, 26 00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:58,992 I think about you all the time. 27 00:00:58,992 --> 00:01:00,627 - It just doesn't make sense to me. 28 00:01:00,627 --> 00:01:02,796 Did you lie because you're not comfortable with who you are? 29 00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:05,332 - I wasn't pretending to be someone else. 30 00:01:05,332 --> 00:01:07,567 I was just fudging a few of the details. 31 00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:08,835 - I don't know that. 32 00:01:08,835 --> 00:01:10,337 I just know you lied a lot. 33 00:01:10,337 --> 00:01:12,572 And I can't be with someone who hasn't accepted themselves. 34 00:01:12,572 --> 00:01:13,573 - I'm okay with who I am. 35 00:01:13,573 --> 00:01:16,243 Maybe for the first time ever. 36 00:01:16,243 --> 00:01:18,312 And I never meant to lie to you. 37 00:01:18,312 --> 00:01:19,746 Okay? 38 00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:21,815 We were lying to Dorothy and you just got in the way. 39 00:01:21,815 --> 00:01:23,917 - Well, I'll do you a favor and get out of yours. 40 00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:25,352 - I didn't mean it like that. 41 00:01:26,586 --> 00:01:27,421 - I did. 42 00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:32,893 - Just to be clear, you're not rejecting me 43 00:01:32,893 --> 00:01:36,730 because of the whole pregnancy thing, right? 44 00:01:36,730 --> 00:01:40,734 'Cause that would be pretty ableist. 45 00:01:40,734 --> 00:01:42,369 - Max. - Okay. 46 00:01:42,369 --> 00:01:45,439 - Don't answer, I'll just go now. 47 00:01:47,007 --> 00:01:48,575 - Where are you going? 48 00:01:48,575 --> 00:01:50,110 - I'm sadly walking away. 49 00:01:51,244 --> 00:01:52,879 - I ordered you an Uber. 50 00:01:52,879 --> 00:01:54,681 Someone's gotta keep an eye out for you. 51 00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:56,516 Even if I only have one. 52 00:01:56,516 --> 00:01:58,218 A little disability humor for you. 53 00:01:58,218 --> 00:02:01,755 - Damn you, a good guy even when breaking my heart. 54 00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:05,359 - I'm not this perfect person you keep saying I am. 55 00:02:05,359 --> 00:02:07,127 And I hope it's not because you think me losing my eye 56 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:09,563 makes me a saint or something because it doesn't. 57 00:02:10,530 --> 00:02:11,698 It's just a part of who I am now. 58 00:02:11,698 --> 00:02:12,532 - That's not... 59 00:02:14,735 --> 00:02:15,802 I wasn't saying that. 60 00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:19,906 - Says the Uber's about a minute away. 61 00:02:19,906 --> 00:02:20,774 It's a Prius. 62 00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:25,045 I gotta get back to the meeting that you interrupted. 63 00:02:25,045 --> 00:02:25,879 - Patrick. 64 00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:29,082 I'm sorry. 65 00:02:30,384 --> 00:02:31,418 - Bye, Max. 66 00:02:31,418 --> 00:02:32,252 - [Max] Wait. 67 00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,589 - What? 68 00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:36,490 - What's a Prius? 69 00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:38,992 - [Narrator] "Womb Envy." 70 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:43,563 - [Recording] When I was birthing the Kikilimana Mountains 71 00:02:43,563 --> 00:02:46,266 of Sri Lanka while pregnant with Lotus, 72 00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:49,102 I could hear her singing a song to me. 73 00:02:49,102 --> 00:02:49,936 I think it was Jeff Buckle. 74 00:02:49,936 --> 00:02:51,104 - Ugh, shut up. 75 00:02:53,306 --> 00:02:55,842 (door squeaks) 76 00:02:56,943 --> 00:02:58,445 - Oh, you're home. 77 00:02:58,445 --> 00:03:00,981 I thought you and Dorothy were going for dinner. 78 00:03:00,981 --> 00:03:03,083 - She hasn't called yet. 79 00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:05,185 - Ah, she's probably lighting candles 80 00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:10,090 or kissing a statue's foot or whatever she read 81 00:03:10,090 --> 00:03:11,992 in Christian Woman monthly. 82 00:03:11,992 --> 00:03:14,294 Are magazines still thing in Elliot Lake? 83 00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:16,163 - I'm guessing by your attitude things 84 00:03:16,163 --> 00:03:17,964 didn't go well with Patrick. 85 00:03:17,964 --> 00:03:20,600 - They did not. 86 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:25,472 - I'm so sorry that you didn't get my ice cream. 87 00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:28,642 - What has become of us? 88 00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:29,943 - Amen to that. 89 00:03:29,943 --> 00:03:32,212 - Oh, so we're praying now. 90 00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:34,481 - Times are dire, but not that dire. 91 00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,484 - I'm so glad you're here. 92 00:03:37,484 --> 00:03:38,985 - I'm glad I'm here too. 93 00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:40,821 You okay? 94 00:03:43,323 --> 00:03:44,891 - No, not really. 95 00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:46,960 - What did you say to him? 96 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:50,664 - Just told him everything that was going on 97 00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:53,400 and that I really liked him. 98 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,668 - He didn't take it well? 99 00:03:54,668 --> 00:03:56,837 (knock on door) 100 00:03:56,837 --> 00:03:58,171 - That's the front door. 101 00:03:58,171 --> 00:04:00,073 - Finally, I'm gonna eat whatever she has 102 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,908 in her purse and then I'm gonna kill her. 103 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,310 - Throw me that pillow. 104 00:04:03,310 --> 00:04:05,145 I gotta cover my indiscretions 105 00:04:05,145 --> 00:04:06,847 and stop you from smothering her. 106 00:04:08,148 --> 00:04:09,382 - Sure you don't want a large bowl of fruit 107 00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:10,851 or an oversized purse. 108 00:04:10,851 --> 00:04:13,487 What did they use to cover up SJP's baby bump. 109 00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:15,422 - Wait, you're going for dinner? 110 00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:17,023 - Yeah. 111 00:04:17,023 --> 00:04:19,192 - I'll just hide in the bathroom. 112 00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:20,694 Tell her I'm taking a shower 113 00:04:20,694 --> 00:04:21,528 - Okay. 114 00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:29,202 (door squeaks) 115 00:04:29,202 --> 00:04:32,372 Patrick at the front door. 116 00:04:32,372 --> 00:04:33,707 - Maggie. 117 00:04:33,707 --> 00:04:35,542 - How are you? 118 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:36,510 - I'm well. 119 00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:37,744 Must almost be time. 120 00:04:37,744 --> 00:04:39,846 - Two weeks, can't come soon enough. 121 00:04:39,846 --> 00:04:41,414 - Is Max here? 122 00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:43,617 - He, um... 123 00:04:45,185 --> 00:04:46,086 - Hey. 124 00:04:47,521 --> 00:04:49,756 - You know that thing where you think of a bunch 125 00:04:49,756 --> 00:04:52,425 of stuff that you should have said after you leave someone? 126 00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:53,460 - Yeah. 127 00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:55,095 - Here's that stuff. 128 00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:57,030 You pretended to be an alcoholic. 129 00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:58,131 Really? 130 00:04:58,131 --> 00:05:00,200 I could maybe understand lying to Dorothy 131 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:01,735 but that had nothing to do with her. 132 00:05:01,735 --> 00:05:06,740 - I never actually told you I was an alcoholic. 133 00:05:08,108 --> 00:05:10,810 You heard my morning sickness and thought Kyle 134 00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:15,415 was my enabler and I just kind of ran with it. 135 00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:17,884 - I'm just not hearing a lot of accountability here. 136 00:05:17,884 --> 00:05:20,220 - Oh and you're hearing is super heightened. 137 00:05:20,220 --> 00:05:23,957 - I'm sorry you got caught up in our lie. 138 00:05:23,957 --> 00:05:25,158 It's all my fault. 139 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,593 - I meant accountability from Max 140 00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:28,161 but thank you. 141 00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:29,963 - She gets a thank you. 142 00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:31,765 - She didn't come to a meeting with me for weeks 143 00:05:31,765 --> 00:05:33,466 and pretending she had a problem and making me 144 00:05:33,466 --> 00:05:35,268 believe we had something big in common. 145 00:05:35,268 --> 00:05:36,903 - You took me to the first meeting 146 00:05:36,903 --> 00:05:38,972 without me being able to say anything. 147 00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:40,640 - Because I thought you had a problem. 148 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:41,474 - I did. 149 00:05:42,976 --> 00:05:45,178 I just wasn't ready to admit it. 150 00:05:46,746 --> 00:05:48,615 And I didn't even know I needed help 151 00:05:48,615 --> 00:05:51,918 until someone was offering it. 152 00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:52,953 - I hope that's true. 153 00:05:53,954 --> 00:05:54,955 - It is. 154 00:05:56,289 --> 00:06:00,994 Max may be self-absorbed, vain, impatient 155 00:06:01,761 --> 00:06:03,263 sometimes inconsiderate. 156 00:06:03,263 --> 00:06:06,166 Generally unhealthy, economically unstable. 157 00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:09,135 His right leg is a few inches shorter than his left. 158 00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:13,273 But he is not a liar, not usually. 159 00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:19,779 Not unless I ask him to be, but I'm not doing that anymore. 160 00:06:19,779 --> 00:06:24,784 So, he's also caring and loyal 161 00:06:26,820 --> 00:06:29,623 and he's always there when it really matters. 162 00:06:31,157 --> 00:06:33,026 - All right, I believe you. 163 00:06:33,026 --> 00:06:36,296 - So he just came here to read me for filth. 164 00:06:36,296 --> 00:06:38,798 - Yeah and to give you back this pregnancy poncho 165 00:06:38,798 --> 00:06:40,734 you left after crashing my meeting. 166 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,636 It's giving off major Ugly Betty vibes. 167 00:06:42,636 --> 00:06:44,004 - He crashed the meeting? 168 00:06:44,004 --> 00:06:45,972 - [Patrick] And interrupted someone speaking. 169 00:06:45,972 --> 00:06:47,140 - He didn't? 170 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:48,008 - I did. 171 00:06:48,008 --> 00:06:49,476 - [Maggie] Oh, Max. 172 00:06:49,476 --> 00:06:54,147 - Remember, self-absorbed, vain and sometimes inconsiderate. 173 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:59,185 - But he did say some really nice things, honest things. 174 00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:01,554 And I feel like there's more we need to talk about. 175 00:07:01,554 --> 00:07:04,858 - Well, please, please come. 176 00:07:06,192 --> 00:07:10,530 I would love to hear more about Max embarrassing himself. 177 00:07:10,530 --> 00:07:13,233 - So he comes in and he says, it's my turn. 178 00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:14,534 I'm pregnant. 179 00:07:14,534 --> 00:07:19,239 - I'm gonna be in my room for this part. 180 00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:22,342 - Okay, okay, okay. 181 00:07:22,342 --> 00:07:24,244 So he says, it's my turn, I'm pregnant. 182 00:07:24,244 --> 00:07:25,078 - Okay. - And. 183 00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:30,417 - You did good kid. 184 00:07:30,417 --> 00:07:31,584 You did good. 185 00:07:32,719 --> 00:07:33,720 - Couldn't have done it without you. 186 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:35,121 - I mean, I just gave you a push, 187 00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:38,692 you did all the devastatingly awkward work. 188 00:07:38,692 --> 00:07:40,126 - A little push. 189 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:42,462 That was a Showgirls push. 190 00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:45,198 That was a Death Becomes Her push. 191 00:07:45,198 --> 00:07:46,032 It was a- 192 00:07:46,032 --> 00:07:46,900 - Oh my God, I get it. 193 00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:48,034 You watch gay movies. 194 00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:51,071 - But I owe you. 195 00:07:51,071 --> 00:07:52,972 - I was just doing my job. 196 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:55,041 - I guess I sort of have myself to thank 197 00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:56,876 since you're just an extension of me. 198 00:07:56,876 --> 00:07:58,778 - Bitch, don't take this away from me. 199 00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:00,413 - You're not pregnant anymore. 200 00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:04,250 - No, gave birth to my own imaginary drape baby. 201 00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:06,820 And then immediately disowned it. 202 00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:09,222 Drowned it. 203 00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:10,323 - Does that mean? 204 00:08:11,591 --> 00:08:13,960 - Now that you are finally relaxed, 205 00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:16,996 you'll probably birth whatever that is any day now. 206 00:08:18,565 --> 00:08:22,335 But since you're not hiding who you are anymore, 207 00:08:23,770 --> 00:08:24,604 I gotta head out. 208 00:08:26,639 --> 00:08:28,575 - Just when I was getting used to you. 209 00:08:28,575 --> 00:08:31,644 - Oh, I'm always here just waiting 210 00:08:31,644 --> 00:08:35,148 for the next crisis to strike so I can sashay in 211 00:08:35,148 --> 00:08:39,619 and pick up the pieces like I always do. 212 00:08:39,619 --> 00:08:43,289 Don't ever pretend to be straight again. 213 00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:44,491 - I promise. 214 00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:46,292 - But be there for Maggie. 215 00:08:46,292 --> 00:08:47,260 She's good for us. 216 00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:48,094 - I will. 217 00:08:49,162 --> 00:08:51,631 - And don't mess things up with Patrick. 218 00:08:51,631 --> 00:08:53,800 This is the second chance we wanted. 219 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:55,769 - I'll do my best. 220 00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:59,806 - Oh, and call Kyle and apologize for being the worst. 221 00:08:59,806 --> 00:09:00,874 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 222 00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:02,509 Tomorrow. 223 00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:04,511 - My bird is ready to fly 224 00:09:05,678 --> 00:09:07,113 and poop all over the place. 225 00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,517 - Stick around for a drink? 226 00:09:10,517 --> 00:09:12,619 - I mean, I'll never say no to a drink. 227 00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:20,827 - You actually said thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. 228 00:09:20,827 --> 00:09:23,062 - Can I make anybody a drink? 229 00:09:23,062 --> 00:09:26,533 - I'll always remember it as being suave and romantic. 230 00:09:26,533 --> 00:09:28,535 - You call that being suave and romantic? 231 00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:31,905 - Okay fine, it's better than taking an Imodium 232 00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,339 and calling it a day. 233 00:09:33,339 --> 00:09:35,208 Do I at least get points for doing it 234 00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,877 while being a physical anomaly? 235 00:09:39,045 --> 00:09:41,147 - Do you know what this whole thing is? 236 00:09:41,147 --> 00:09:43,416 - There's not a ton of research, but one guess is 237 00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:45,318 that the men is subconsciously envious 238 00:09:45,318 --> 00:09:46,886 of a woman's ability to become pregnant. 239 00:09:46,886 --> 00:09:49,489 - So you have womb envy? 240 00:09:49,489 --> 00:09:50,990 - Thanks, Patrick. 241 00:09:50,990 --> 00:09:52,258 Thanks a lot. 242 00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:54,494 I'm never gonna live it down. 243 00:09:54,494 --> 00:09:57,163 - I mean, it's no surprise, who wouldn't be envious 244 00:09:57,163 --> 00:09:58,898 of all this. 245 00:09:58,898 --> 00:10:01,734 - [Max] All right, all right, calm yourself. 246 00:10:01,734 --> 00:10:03,203 - I guess I did enough with my life 247 00:10:03,203 --> 00:10:04,671 to make you jealous of me. 248 00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:08,708 - I'm not jealous that you have to talk to Dorothy tonight. 249 00:10:08,708 --> 00:10:10,543 Do you know what you're gonna say? 250 00:10:10,543 --> 00:10:12,512 - Hey mom, I'm terrified of you. 251 00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:14,180 I'm terrified you'll hurt yourself 252 00:10:14,180 --> 00:10:17,884 or relapse or smite me with your religious damnation. 253 00:10:17,884 --> 00:10:18,718 How does that sound? 254 00:10:18,718 --> 00:10:20,019 - Eh? 255 00:10:20,019 --> 00:10:21,454 Needs some work? 256 00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:22,388 - Yeah. 257 00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:23,790 - She still hasn't called yet. 258 00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:24,791 Where is she? 259 00:10:24,791 --> 00:10:26,292 - Does anybody want some acid? 260 00:10:29,562 --> 00:10:30,563 - Have a nice night. 261 00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:31,397 - Go to hell. 262 00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:36,069 - I'm not her biggest fan but she does seem 263 00:10:36,069 --> 00:10:37,370 like a different person. 264 00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:39,906 I think she'll throw a few Bible verses our way 265 00:10:39,906 --> 00:10:43,243 when we tell her but I'm pretty sure that'll be it. 266 00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:45,912 It's better than the wine corks she used to throw at us. 267 00:10:45,912 --> 00:10:48,915 And maybe it'll bring you two closer together. 268 00:10:48,915 --> 00:10:50,149 (knock at door) 269 00:10:50,149 --> 00:10:51,651 Oh, and that's Dorothy. 270 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,053 Her angel spies heard everything. 271 00:10:55,722 --> 00:10:58,324 (knock at door) 272 00:10:59,759 --> 00:11:01,094 - Sodomy. 273 00:11:05,398 --> 00:11:07,600 - [Narrator] Womb Envy is created by Champagna, 274 00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,436 written by Mark Keller, produced by Charlie David, 275 00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:12,238 directed by Jake Horowitz. 276 00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:14,607 Cinematography by Paul Maxwell. 277 00:11:14,607 --> 00:11:16,476 "Womb Envy" is produced and distributed 278 00:11:16,476 --> 00:11:18,645 by Border 2 Border Entertainment in association 279 00:11:18,645 --> 00:11:21,247 with AMI and OUT TV. 280 00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:23,783 Integrated described video by AMI featuring, 281 00:11:23,783 --> 00:11:26,686 Daniel Fernandes, Storm Steenson 282 00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:31,691 Jeffrey Haase, Helen Holtham, Champagna, and Luke Avoledo. 283 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,127 ♪ I'm out the cage tryna let out the beast ♪ 284 00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:36,029 ♪ Revolutionary got let out the streets ♪ 285 00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,932 ♪ Locked in a cage I'mma let out the ♪ 286 00:11:38,932 --> 00:11:41,601 (upbeat music) 287 00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:52,211 - [Narrator] Copyright 2023 Border 2 Border Entertainment.