1 00:00:06,043 --> 00:00:08,959 [dramatic music playing] 2 00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:12,043 The world ends today! 3 00:00:14,418 --> 00:00:17,459 The skies will burn and fill with bugs! 4 00:00:17,459 --> 00:00:19,959 Well, which is it, pal? Honestly. 5 00:00:19,959 --> 00:00:23,584 [sighs] Sir, you've been warned about bothering the nice people. 6 00:00:23,584 --> 00:00:26,168 They're not people. They're bug food! 7 00:00:26,168 --> 00:00:28,418 We're all bug food! 8 00:00:28,418 --> 00:00:30,251 [humans gasp] 9 00:00:32,043 --> 00:00:33,834 - [man 1] Bugs! - [panicking] 10 00:00:33,834 --> 00:00:35,084 {\an8}- [bones crackle] - [man 2 yells] 11 00:00:35,084 --> 00:00:36,209 {\an8}[humans screaming] 12 00:00:36,209 --> 00:00:37,376 What do we do now? 13 00:00:37,376 --> 00:00:39,084 - Uh... - [man 3 yells] 14 00:00:39,084 --> 00:00:40,709 Are you gonna make me your king? 15 00:00:40,709 --> 00:00:42,501 I was... right? 16 00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:43,626 [music builds, crescendos] 17 00:00:43,626 --> 00:00:46,751 [theme music playing] 18 00:00:54,459 --> 00:00:56,001 [whimsical music playing] 19 00:00:57,001 --> 00:00:59,459 {\an8}Happy Easter! 20 00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:01,834 {\an8}Pee! Eat her pee! 21 00:01:01,834 --> 00:01:04,168 {\an8}- Eat her pee! - [Lucy groans] 22 00:01:04,168 --> 00:01:07,626 {\an8}Ah, stupid scratchy Easter pants. 23 00:01:07,626 --> 00:01:09,626 What is the big deal about Easter anyway? 24 00:01:09,626 --> 00:01:10,709 No presents, 25 00:01:10,709 --> 00:01:11,876 girl colors, 26 00:01:11,876 --> 00:01:14,918 and, you know, real-life bunnies eat their babies. 27 00:01:14,918 --> 00:01:16,001 It's disgusting! 28 00:01:16,001 --> 00:01:17,459 Matthew, please. 29 00:01:17,459 --> 00:01:19,959 Can you try to be classy for one day? 30 00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:22,043 - [Matty groans] - I've arrived. 31 00:01:22,043 --> 00:01:24,251 Would anyone like to announce me, 32 00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:25,334 as I've arrived? 33 00:01:25,334 --> 00:01:26,793 Nice cape, jackass. 34 00:01:26,793 --> 00:01:28,459 What are you, Superman? [chuckles] 35 00:01:28,459 --> 00:01:30,168 No, wait. Batman? 36 00:01:30,168 --> 00:01:32,001 Damn it. Dracula? 37 00:01:32,001 --> 00:01:33,293 Lando Calrissian? 38 00:01:33,293 --> 00:01:35,793 Ah, is everyone who wears a cape awesome? 39 00:01:35,793 --> 00:01:37,001 Should I wear a cape? 40 00:01:37,001 --> 00:01:39,334 I'm sorry about the president, Your Kingness. 41 00:01:39,334 --> 00:01:41,501 He doesn't know how to behave at a party like this. 42 00:01:41,501 --> 00:01:44,751 Well, may I say, that was a textbook curtsy. 43 00:01:44,751 --> 00:01:48,251 Well, I did minor in etiquette and mixology at UNLV. 44 00:01:48,251 --> 00:01:52,793 And as Miss America, may I say that that is a beautiful crown and sash. 45 00:01:52,793 --> 00:01:55,043 Matty, doesn't he look like Prince Charming? 46 00:01:55,043 --> 00:01:57,918 Well, I hope not. The real Prince Philibert Charming 47 00:01:57,918 --> 00:02:00,668 used to ride around and make women try on shoes 48 00:02:00,668 --> 00:02:02,668 because that was his thing. 49 00:02:02,668 --> 00:02:05,001 - Uh-huh. - Smile for the camera! 50 00:02:05,001 --> 00:02:06,168 Then frown, 51 00:02:06,168 --> 00:02:08,709 'cause I don't know how to develop pictures. 52 00:02:09,543 --> 00:02:12,001 Where the Fudgie the Whale is everybody? 53 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:14,709 We are still a Christian nation, are we not? 54 00:02:14,709 --> 00:02:18,084 Actually, we never really were. The Founding Fathers were deists-- 55 00:02:18,084 --> 00:02:21,751 Simon, this is fascinating, but you're too close for these old ears. 56 00:02:21,751 --> 00:02:24,459 Would you mind taking two steps backwards while you talk? 57 00:02:24,459 --> 00:02:26,084 Certainly. Thomas Jefferson-- 58 00:02:26,084 --> 00:02:27,793 - Floor hole! - This is just sad. 59 00:02:27,793 --> 00:02:31,168 This is the hurfin' turfin' White House Easter egg roll. 60 00:02:31,168 --> 00:02:33,793 In the '80s, this was the party of the year. 61 00:02:33,793 --> 00:02:36,918 - [upbeat music playing] - [crowd cheering] 62 00:02:38,626 --> 00:02:39,793 [tires screech] 63 00:02:40,918 --> 00:02:43,209 [cheering intensifies] 64 00:02:43,209 --> 00:02:46,709 I don't know, man, but I was all alone for mass this morning. 65 00:02:46,709 --> 00:02:49,501 You had a empty church on Easter? 66 00:02:49,501 --> 00:02:50,918 I blame the aliens. 67 00:02:50,918 --> 00:02:51,834 Bishop Lee 68 00:02:51,834 --> 00:02:53,876 from the Pentecostal Bethlehem Temple of Fire 69 00:02:53,876 --> 00:02:55,459 and What Else No Don't Write What Else 70 00:02:55,459 --> 00:02:57,209 What Do You Mean You Were Chiseling the Sign While I Talked 71 00:02:57,209 --> 00:02:58,251 and Now All of This is on the Sign 72 00:02:58,251 --> 00:02:59,376 Well You Are One Fast Chiseler 73 00:02:59,376 --> 00:03:01,001 Now Just Write of God and Christ Church Period 74 00:03:01,001 --> 00:03:03,584 No Don't Write Period the Last Thing on the Sign Should Be Church. 75 00:03:03,584 --> 00:03:05,584 Well, that's a mighty long name, Bishop. 76 00:03:05,584 --> 00:03:07,793 There was a issue with the guy who chiseled the sign. 77 00:03:07,793 --> 00:03:11,376 Look, the alien attack was clearly the Rapture, 78 00:03:11,376 --> 00:03:15,543 which means everyone on Earth got left behind and is going to hell. 79 00:03:15,543 --> 00:03:17,626 But folks don't like hearing that. 80 00:03:17,626 --> 00:03:21,668 Well, Bishop, if we're all left behind, why are you here? 81 00:03:21,668 --> 00:03:23,209 - Secret family. - Oh. 82 00:03:23,209 --> 00:03:25,043 The beauty of Unitarianism... 83 00:03:25,043 --> 00:03:28,084 Debby, would you be a dear and take seven or eight steps backwards? 84 00:03:28,084 --> 00:03:32,001 ...is that we don't pretend to have all the answers. Or any. 85 00:03:33,001 --> 00:03:35,668 Just questions and music from the '60s. 86 00:03:35,668 --> 00:03:36,584 ♪ One pear... ♪ 87 00:03:36,584 --> 00:03:39,126 Well, no wonder you all have fewer followers 88 00:03:39,126 --> 00:03:41,251 than a white fella in a hundred-yard dash. 89 00:03:41,251 --> 00:03:44,834 People want reassurance and hope, not guilt trips and gobbledygook. 90 00:03:44,834 --> 00:03:48,834 Or marital advice from someone who does not know what he's talking about. 91 00:03:48,834 --> 00:03:51,126 How is babby formed? 92 00:03:51,126 --> 00:03:55,168 Ah, traditional religion may be out of step with our new reality. 93 00:03:55,168 --> 00:03:58,459 ...and that is why God wants you to have two dishwashers. 94 00:03:58,459 --> 00:04:01,501 What does Leviticus say about my face being upside-down? 95 00:04:01,501 --> 00:04:03,918 Which means y'all are of no use to me. 96 00:04:03,918 --> 00:04:07,918 A shepherd without a flock is just a guy who talks about sheep a little too much. 97 00:04:07,918 --> 00:04:11,334 It's not fair, man. We can't compete with Dave. 98 00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:12,251 Dave? 99 00:04:12,251 --> 00:04:14,001 - Who is Dave? - [whimsical music plays] 100 00:04:14,834 --> 00:04:19,418 We can overcome discord with friendship. 101 00:04:19,418 --> 00:04:21,376 Friendship is magic. 102 00:04:21,376 --> 00:04:24,084 - [indistinct chatter] - [uplifting music plays] 103 00:04:28,251 --> 00:04:31,709 [straining, panting] 104 00:04:31,709 --> 00:04:33,709 Axatrax? Are you okay? 105 00:04:33,709 --> 00:04:35,668 Yup, just chillin'. [groans] 106 00:04:35,668 --> 00:04:37,334 Ooh, what's wrong with your head? 107 00:04:37,334 --> 00:04:38,418 Give me some space. 108 00:04:38,418 --> 00:04:40,209 God, you're like a European on the subway. 109 00:04:40,751 --> 00:04:43,626 My Earth research included a bunch of Colin Quinn standup. 110 00:04:43,626 --> 00:04:47,001 Well, it's just that, um... it looks really weird. 111 00:04:47,001 --> 00:04:49,501 My species is hermaphroditic, okay? 112 00:04:49,501 --> 00:04:52,376 Every year, I alternate between expelling eggs or spermatozo... 113 00:04:52,376 --> 00:04:55,084 - Oh boy, here it comes! Look away! - [squelch] 114 00:04:55,084 --> 00:04:57,293 - [squelching] - [Dr. Braun] Wow. 115 00:04:58,459 --> 00:05:00,584 You know, clownfish can change gender too. 116 00:05:00,584 --> 00:05:02,543 If Finding Nemo happened for real, 117 00:05:02,543 --> 00:05:04,459 the dad would have mated with his son. 118 00:05:04,459 --> 00:05:05,543 Read the room. 119 00:05:05,543 --> 00:05:08,334 Well, I'm sorry to intrude. If you'd ever like to watch me ovulate... 120 00:05:08,334 --> 00:05:10,501 It's not gonna happen, Farrah. Let it go. 121 00:05:10,501 --> 00:05:12,168 [grunts, groans] 122 00:05:12,668 --> 00:05:14,751 [Jeremy] ...and of course, this is a disciplinary fork 123 00:05:14,751 --> 00:05:17,293 for when the servants serve you soup on the wrong side. 124 00:05:17,293 --> 00:05:19,334 Bad. Bad servant. Stupid. 125 00:05:19,334 --> 00:05:20,959 [Matty] Oh, pfft. That's nothing. 126 00:05:20,959 --> 00:05:22,959 I went to Steve-O's circus camp in high school, 127 00:05:22,959 --> 00:05:24,209 and they stabbed us a bunch. 128 00:05:24,209 --> 00:05:27,834 Matthew, maybe make yourself useful and go check on the egg roll. 129 00:05:27,834 --> 00:05:29,376 Oh. Okay. 130 00:05:30,001 --> 00:05:31,918 - [whimsical music plays] - [Matty scoffs] 131 00:05:31,918 --> 00:05:35,584 I think horses are the most elegant animal to sit on top of. 132 00:05:35,584 --> 00:05:37,168 I couldn't agree more. 133 00:05:37,168 --> 00:05:38,876 I'll show them an egg roll. 134 00:05:39,376 --> 00:05:43,043 "Dolley Madison started the egg roll in 1814 135 00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:46,501 as a way to round up children for factory work." 136 00:05:46,501 --> 00:05:49,001 Egg roll's canceled due to being for babies. 137 00:05:49,001 --> 00:05:52,918 Welcome to the first annual White House egg hunt! 138 00:05:52,918 --> 00:05:55,668 Actually, we can't do that either. There are no eggs in the world. 139 00:05:55,668 --> 00:05:58,751 Ah, then what do you call those, Nerdington? 140 00:05:58,751 --> 00:06:00,126 Sticks and stones, Matty. 141 00:06:00,126 --> 00:06:02,959 But also, words can hurt as well, so... 142 00:06:02,959 --> 00:06:04,709 Oh, come on, what dillweed hid these? 143 00:06:04,709 --> 00:06:06,501 You don't just put 'em all together. 144 00:06:07,084 --> 00:06:07,918 [grass rustles] 145 00:06:07,918 --> 00:06:09,626 Color me impressed, son. 146 00:06:09,626 --> 00:06:13,543 Why, you must have had 200 souls in there, hanging on your every word. 147 00:06:13,543 --> 00:06:15,001 The guy washing my feet was-- 148 00:06:15,001 --> 00:06:17,376 Alfred Yankovic. I saw. 149 00:06:17,376 --> 00:06:18,834 So, what's this all about? 150 00:06:18,834 --> 00:06:20,543 If you're a cop, you have to tell me. 151 00:06:20,543 --> 00:06:22,209 No, I'm the vice president. 152 00:06:22,209 --> 00:06:23,126 I see. 153 00:06:23,126 --> 00:06:26,793 Religion and government are like two dogs what got stuck on each other in a rut. 154 00:06:26,793 --> 00:06:27,709 Your pulpit-- 155 00:06:27,709 --> 00:06:29,834 It's actually a seat from National Stadium. 156 00:06:29,834 --> 00:06:33,459 Lifelong Expos fan. I came with them when they moved to DC. 157 00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:36,209 Really? Well, that's, uh... unusual. 158 00:06:36,209 --> 00:06:37,126 Oh, okay. 159 00:06:37,126 --> 00:06:39,293 Well, either way, that seat is a powerful platform. 160 00:06:39,293 --> 00:06:43,043 You could tell folks what to believe, what issues to care about, how to vote-- 161 00:06:43,043 --> 00:06:45,251 [chuckles] I can't vote. Three strikes. 162 00:06:45,251 --> 00:06:48,793 Just think what you and the Mulligan administration could do together. 163 00:06:48,793 --> 00:06:51,834 You play your cards right, and you could be the next Billy Graham. 164 00:06:51,834 --> 00:06:55,209 I think I'd rather just stay David J. Fudgesniffer. 165 00:06:55,209 --> 00:06:56,959 Well, let's just go with "Dave" for now. 166 00:06:56,959 --> 00:07:00,251 Damn it, Jeff. Why'd you have to go and tell LaMarr about that guy? 167 00:07:00,251 --> 00:07:02,084 Because I'm stupid, okay? 168 00:07:02,084 --> 00:07:05,168 I went to seminary on a basketball scholarship. 169 00:07:05,168 --> 00:07:08,418 God forgive me, but religion as we know it is over. 170 00:07:08,418 --> 00:07:11,293 Not the Anglican Church. It lives so long as I do. 171 00:07:11,293 --> 00:07:14,126 As king, I can send anyone here to Anglican hell, 172 00:07:14,126 --> 00:07:15,293 which is Catholic heaven. 173 00:07:15,293 --> 00:07:16,959 I didn't know you were religious. 174 00:07:16,959 --> 00:07:20,251 I was a card girl at Crystal Pines Megachurch and Casino. 175 00:07:20,251 --> 00:07:21,376 [Matty] No cheating. 176 00:07:21,376 --> 00:07:23,626 Any kid looks, they get a wet willy. 177 00:07:23,626 --> 00:07:24,543 Real wet. 178 00:07:24,543 --> 00:07:25,793 Ugh. 179 00:07:25,793 --> 00:07:27,501 Ladies and gentlemen, 180 00:07:27,501 --> 00:07:31,001 I'm proud to introduce my good friend Prophet Dave 181 00:07:31,001 --> 00:07:33,918 to lead us in the traditional Easter blessing. 182 00:07:33,918 --> 00:07:34,918 [clears throat] 183 00:07:34,918 --> 00:07:36,084 Hey, everybody. 184 00:07:36,084 --> 00:07:38,876 Yeah, yeah, I've actually got a new prophecy. 185 00:07:38,876 --> 00:07:41,209 'Cause earlier, God told me 186 00:07:41,209 --> 00:07:43,293 that, uh, today at the egg hunt, 187 00:07:43,293 --> 00:07:46,084 the eggs are gonna hunt us. 188 00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:49,376 - [all chuckling] - [LaMarr groans] 189 00:07:49,376 --> 00:07:52,376 [Bishop Lee chuckles] That guy's crazy. 190 00:07:52,376 --> 00:07:55,501 And I once brought my secret family to meet my real family. 191 00:07:55,501 --> 00:07:56,876 [dramatic music playing] 192 00:07:56,876 --> 00:07:57,793 [crackling] 193 00:07:57,793 --> 00:08:01,501 [gnashing] 194 00:08:02,084 --> 00:08:03,334 Colder. 195 00:08:03,334 --> 00:08:04,584 Freezing. 196 00:08:04,584 --> 00:08:06,293 Oh my God, kid, you suck. 197 00:08:06,293 --> 00:08:08,293 What did you do with my eggs, you science pervert? 198 00:08:08,293 --> 00:08:11,126 What? No, I left them in the bushes, right where you egested them. 199 00:08:11,126 --> 00:08:13,501 That was you? Nice hiding, Braun. 200 00:08:13,501 --> 00:08:15,251 Love to play hide-and-seek with you. 201 00:08:15,251 --> 00:08:18,793 Hey, guys, I found Braun! She was just sitting there in a pile! 202 00:08:18,793 --> 00:08:20,543 Wait, you took the eggs? 203 00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:22,168 Yeah, and hid 'em good. 204 00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:23,084 No! 205 00:08:23,084 --> 00:08:25,084 If not fertilized within the first hour, 206 00:08:25,084 --> 00:08:28,793 Cardibean eggs have evolved to attack and devour their mother 207 00:08:28,793 --> 00:08:30,418 and anyone else in their path. 208 00:08:30,418 --> 00:08:32,001 It is an evolutionary adaptation 209 00:08:32,001 --> 00:08:35,334 to discourage a once-thriving Cardibean hook-up culture. 210 00:08:35,334 --> 00:08:37,418 - [romantic music playing] - [tongues smacking] 211 00:08:39,668 --> 00:08:41,376 [in alien language] Dude, when did your eggs get so big? 212 00:08:41,376 --> 00:08:42,293 [crackling] 213 00:08:42,293 --> 00:08:43,918 - [hisses] - [screams] 214 00:08:43,918 --> 00:08:46,751 [in English] So your unfertilized eggs try to ruin your life? 215 00:08:46,751 --> 00:08:49,459 Join the club. I, uh... 216 00:08:49,459 --> 00:08:51,584 If we don't find those eggs and destroy them, 217 00:08:51,584 --> 00:08:53,876 they'll keep growing bigger and more bloodthirsty 218 00:08:53,876 --> 00:08:55,418 until they kill us all. 219 00:08:55,418 --> 00:08:58,459 So you're saying this Easter egg hunt 220 00:08:58,459 --> 00:09:01,959 just became an Easter egg hunt. 221 00:09:02,543 --> 00:09:04,418 I mean, I guess? 222 00:09:04,418 --> 00:09:06,126 You just said the same thing twice. 223 00:09:06,126 --> 00:09:08,418 Do we have any idea how many eggs there are? 224 00:09:08,418 --> 00:09:10,418 At least a million. Maybe a billion. 225 00:09:10,418 --> 00:09:11,334 One hundred. 226 00:09:11,334 --> 00:09:13,709 There are always exactly one hundred. 227 00:09:13,709 --> 00:09:15,959 Now, Matthew, where did you hide them? 228 00:09:16,543 --> 00:09:19,418 - I've already forgotten. - [dramatic music plays] 229 00:09:20,001 --> 00:09:22,668 Yeah! They'll grow mouths and feet and stuff. 230 00:09:22,668 --> 00:09:24,709 They're gonna eat us! 231 00:09:24,709 --> 00:09:26,459 [all laughing] 232 00:09:26,459 --> 00:09:28,168 Could I grab the prophet for a mo? 233 00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:29,626 Which is short for Moesha, 234 00:09:29,626 --> 00:09:32,293 so about 22 minutes without commercials. 235 00:09:34,543 --> 00:09:36,293 Dave, let's be frank. 236 00:09:36,293 --> 00:09:38,209 Both of us? Won't that be confusing? 237 00:09:38,209 --> 00:09:40,376 No, not our names, boy. 238 00:09:40,376 --> 00:09:43,251 Look, you got lucky with that whole "bugs are coming" thing, 239 00:09:43,251 --> 00:09:45,293 and now you got a nice little setup. 240 00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:47,459 All those acolytes hanging on your every word, 241 00:09:47,459 --> 00:09:49,709 like an old lady's wig on Tyler Perry. 242 00:09:49,709 --> 00:09:50,626 Understernt? 243 00:09:50,626 --> 00:09:52,251 Why do you know so much about-- 244 00:09:52,251 --> 00:09:55,501 Every time I'm up for reelection, they make me brush up on Black culture. 245 00:09:55,501 --> 00:09:57,459 - She ready. - I don't get the reference. 246 00:09:57,459 --> 00:10:01,793 I'm just saying people might lose faith if your prophecies forget to come true, 247 00:10:01,793 --> 00:10:03,584 and then we both lose out. 248 00:10:03,584 --> 00:10:06,251 So don't ruin this like the series finale of Girlfriends. 249 00:10:06,251 --> 00:10:08,001 Dude, I'm trying to ruin it! 250 00:10:08,001 --> 00:10:10,376 Being a prophet has totally beefed up my life! 251 00:10:10,376 --> 00:10:11,626 Totally beefed it! 252 00:10:11,626 --> 00:10:12,626 [dramatic music plays] 253 00:10:15,334 --> 00:10:17,043 [snarling] 254 00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:20,209 - That's six. - [Lucy chuckles] 255 00:10:20,209 --> 00:10:22,209 [both chuckle] 256 00:10:22,209 --> 00:10:24,168 - [Dr. Braun] Where are you going? - To get Lucy. 257 00:10:24,168 --> 00:10:27,001 There's aliens to hunt, and that's, like, our thing. 258 00:10:27,001 --> 00:10:30,168 Let's see King Jeremy use his fancy fork to stab an egg. 259 00:10:30,168 --> 00:10:31,168 No, that's not... 260 00:10:31,168 --> 00:10:32,418 Ah, you get what I'm saying. 261 00:10:32,418 --> 00:10:33,543 Yeah, I get it, Matty. 262 00:10:33,543 --> 00:10:36,418 You would have loved England before it melted and then sank. 263 00:10:36,418 --> 00:10:38,584 [sighs] It's not even fit for the Irish now. 264 00:10:38,584 --> 00:10:40,293 I always dreamed of going, 265 00:10:40,293 --> 00:10:42,501 but I've never even had a hot breakfast tomato. 266 00:10:42,501 --> 00:10:45,126 You must think I'm so, like, common. 267 00:10:45,126 --> 00:10:46,043 [Jeremy] Common? 268 00:10:46,043 --> 00:10:48,293 I think you're positively one of a kind. 269 00:10:48,959 --> 00:10:50,418 - [squelch] - [Matty] Give me that. 270 00:10:50,418 --> 00:10:52,084 - [Matty grunts] - [Lucy groans] 271 00:10:52,084 --> 00:10:55,001 [Matty] What's the matter, egg? Tree got your face? 272 00:10:55,001 --> 00:10:57,709 - [Jeremy] Oh dear. - Can we maybe take a walk? 273 00:10:58,209 --> 00:11:00,959 - [whimsical music plays] - [camera shutter clicks] 274 00:11:00,959 --> 00:11:04,001 I do like the noise it makes when I press the button! 275 00:11:04,001 --> 00:11:04,918 [sighs] 276 00:11:04,918 --> 00:11:08,376 Look, I used to get high all the time. You get high? 277 00:11:08,376 --> 00:11:10,918 I once took Mama's nerve powder on accident. 278 00:11:10,918 --> 00:11:12,918 It was, uh... interesting. 279 00:11:12,918 --> 00:11:15,459 {\an8}Okay, if we drive all night, we could get to Vegas by morning. 280 00:11:15,459 --> 00:11:17,543 {\an8}We take the money from Social Security. We put it all on black. 281 00:11:17,543 --> 00:11:18,459 {\an8}Goodbye, deficit. 282 00:11:18,459 --> 00:11:20,209 {\an8}Drinks are free, so we don't have to worry about that. 283 00:11:20,209 --> 00:11:22,334 {\an8}Who is writing this down? 284 00:11:22,334 --> 00:11:26,334 Well, my jam was boxed wine and PCP, natch, 285 00:11:26,334 --> 00:11:28,459 and I would just say whatever. 286 00:11:28,459 --> 00:11:30,001 Sometimes I was right. 287 00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:32,209 Don't eat Bill Cosby's soup! 288 00:11:32,209 --> 00:11:34,001 Do not eat his soup! 289 00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:36,543 But usually I was less right. 290 00:11:36,543 --> 00:11:37,501 This isn't my head! 291 00:11:37,501 --> 00:11:38,959 Who put this head on my body? 292 00:11:38,959 --> 00:11:40,626 I gotta get it off! [strains] 293 00:11:40,626 --> 00:11:42,751 I gotta find my real head! [strains] 294 00:11:42,751 --> 00:11:44,251 The post office took my head! 295 00:11:44,251 --> 00:11:46,084 Then I predicted the bug thing, 296 00:11:46,084 --> 00:11:49,876 and for, like, a week, it was great, people bringing me drugs and boxed wine, 297 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:52,834 but it's, like, kinda taken over my life now. 298 00:11:52,834 --> 00:11:54,959 Like when I started the Senate Model Train Club. 299 00:11:54,959 --> 00:11:58,751 What I like about model trains is playing with model trains, 300 00:11:58,751 --> 00:12:01,459 not juggling schedules and snack rotations. 301 00:12:01,459 --> 00:12:05,043 I've got all the PCP in the world, but no time to do it! 302 00:12:05,043 --> 00:12:08,543 All day, it's just, "Say some stuff, Prophet Dave." 303 00:12:08,543 --> 00:12:10,876 "Have sex with us, Prophet Dave." 304 00:12:10,876 --> 00:12:13,334 So I just quote My Little Pony. 305 00:12:13,334 --> 00:12:16,043 The PCP community is all Bronies, you see. 306 00:12:16,043 --> 00:12:19,168 The colors, the talking horses, a chaos dragon named Discord. 307 00:12:19,168 --> 00:12:21,168 It's basically what we're seeing anyway. 308 00:12:21,168 --> 00:12:22,959 No, I get the appeal. 309 00:12:22,959 --> 00:12:24,001 A positive message. 310 00:12:24,001 --> 00:12:27,209 And I assume the ponies have manes you can brush? 311 00:12:27,209 --> 00:12:28,376 The way I see it, man, 312 00:12:28,376 --> 00:12:32,126 my only way out of this is to be so wrong that people stop listening to me. 313 00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:33,626 [dramatic music plays] 314 00:12:33,626 --> 00:12:37,001 Hey, Dave, what's gonna attack us next? 315 00:12:37,001 --> 00:12:39,418 Maybe the bear that just wandered in here? 316 00:12:39,418 --> 00:12:41,043 - Oh, crap, bad example. - [all gasp] 317 00:12:41,043 --> 00:12:42,084 Is that real? 318 00:12:42,084 --> 00:12:43,834 But you guys know what I meant. 319 00:12:43,834 --> 00:12:46,293 That Dave guy's scared of eggs. 320 00:12:46,293 --> 00:12:48,584 - [all chuckling] - [bear growls] 321 00:12:48,584 --> 00:12:50,168 [whimsical music plays] 322 00:12:51,376 --> 00:12:52,501 This is nice. 323 00:12:53,043 --> 00:12:54,793 It almost makes me forget how crazy every-- 324 00:12:54,793 --> 00:12:56,209 - [bat screeches] - [Lucy yelps] 325 00:12:57,126 --> 00:12:59,209 You know, every day could be like this. 326 00:12:59,209 --> 00:13:00,418 Are you about to sing? 327 00:13:00,418 --> 00:13:01,418 What? No. 328 00:13:01,418 --> 00:13:04,543 Oh, your accent just makes it seem like you're always about to sing. 329 00:13:04,543 --> 00:13:06,668 Lucy, I've got everything I could ever want. 330 00:13:06,668 --> 00:13:08,209 A working shower, a roof, 331 00:13:08,209 --> 00:13:10,001 American tea to complain about. 332 00:13:10,001 --> 00:13:12,793 It's just so imperceptibly worse. 333 00:13:12,793 --> 00:13:16,501 But the one thing I'm missing is a queen to share it all with. 334 00:13:16,501 --> 00:13:19,709 And there's not a woman left alive who can hold a candle to you. 335 00:13:19,709 --> 00:13:20,918 And if they did, 336 00:13:20,918 --> 00:13:23,418 it would only further illuminate your beauty. 337 00:13:23,418 --> 00:13:26,543 Oh, as long as it doesn't touch my dress. 338 00:13:26,543 --> 00:13:28,459 Uh, it's very flammable. 339 00:13:29,251 --> 00:13:30,376 [Jeremy] Mmm. 340 00:13:30,376 --> 00:13:31,459 [Lucy] Mmm. 341 00:13:31,459 --> 00:13:34,084 - [Jeremy gasps] - I'm sorry, I can't. [cries] 342 00:13:35,876 --> 00:13:39,543 Heard you're looking for a queen. What do you think, huh? Huh? 343 00:13:39,543 --> 00:13:40,834 [sighs] 344 00:13:41,834 --> 00:13:43,584 [whimsical music playing] 345 00:13:45,418 --> 00:13:46,751 Hey, there you are. 346 00:13:46,751 --> 00:13:49,793 [scoffs] Obviously. I'm always where I am. 347 00:13:49,793 --> 00:13:51,168 What are you accusing me of? 348 00:13:51,168 --> 00:13:55,084 Look, Axatrax screwed up, and now his eggs are trying to eat everybody. 349 00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,626 It's like Gremlins 2. 350 00:13:56,626 --> 00:13:57,626 But they're eggs. 351 00:13:57,626 --> 00:13:58,751 And there's no Gizmo. 352 00:13:58,751 --> 00:13:59,793 And it's not a movie. 353 00:13:59,793 --> 00:14:01,543 What a crazy day. 354 00:14:01,543 --> 00:14:03,251 - Why? What else happened? - Uh, nothing. 355 00:14:03,251 --> 00:14:06,376 You know Easter. People just kinda go nuts. 356 00:14:06,376 --> 00:14:09,918 Yeah, well, now we got aliens to fight, partner. 357 00:14:09,918 --> 00:14:11,251 Yes, partners. 358 00:14:11,251 --> 00:14:12,543 Matty and Lucy. 359 00:14:12,543 --> 00:14:13,668 [egg growling] 360 00:14:13,668 --> 00:14:16,001 - What the hell is that? - That's them, but the feet are new. 361 00:14:16,001 --> 00:14:17,251 [Jeremy screams, grunts] 362 00:14:17,251 --> 00:14:19,084 Heavens to Murgatroyd. 363 00:14:19,084 --> 00:14:21,584 No, beyond Murgatroyd. Well beyond. 364 00:14:21,584 --> 00:14:22,918 The eggs have evolved. 365 00:14:22,918 --> 00:14:24,918 They are now, unfortunately, mobile. 366 00:14:24,918 --> 00:14:26,793 Hey, wait, where'd she get a gun? 367 00:14:26,793 --> 00:14:29,543 That's not fair. I've just been throwin' and stompin'. 368 00:14:30,876 --> 00:14:32,543 Oh yeah, I like this one. 369 00:14:32,543 --> 00:14:35,376 I mean, hers has the thing on top, but that's fine. No, I like mine. 370 00:14:35,376 --> 00:14:36,459 That's 57 eggs. 371 00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:38,209 Now are you glad I asked to keep score? 372 00:14:38,209 --> 00:14:40,501 I have my own tally counter. These are called tally counters. 373 00:14:40,501 --> 00:14:41,793 We've gotta get the kids inside. 374 00:14:41,793 --> 00:14:42,793 I'll help with that. 375 00:14:42,793 --> 00:14:46,209 Then I'm just going to pop home, change into some proper hunting pinks, 376 00:14:46,209 --> 00:14:48,251 and then definitely come help you. 377 00:14:48,251 --> 00:14:51,834 [chuckles] Oh okay. Yeah, you go ahead and do that, sweetheart. 378 00:14:51,834 --> 00:14:53,959 Luce, let's rock 'n' roll. 379 00:14:53,959 --> 00:14:56,501 'Cause this Easter, the eggs are hunting us. 380 00:14:56,501 --> 00:15:00,001 What? No, no, no, I should be the one who says cool stuff like that. 381 00:15:00,001 --> 00:15:02,251 - This eggs, the Easter... - [cinematic music plays] 382 00:15:02,251 --> 00:15:03,293 No, hold on. 383 00:15:03,293 --> 00:15:05,543 - [cinematic music plays] - Hunting eggs isn't deviled unless... 384 00:15:05,543 --> 00:15:06,959 That doesn't even make sense. 385 00:15:06,959 --> 00:15:09,459 Goddamn it! Forget it! Let's just go! 386 00:15:10,459 --> 00:15:13,626 [Jeremy] Yes, that's the long and, I'm afraid, the short of it. 387 00:15:13,626 --> 00:15:17,334 Obviously, I can't hunt anything dressed like this, so I'll just be off. 388 00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:19,459 Cheerio. Lock the doors behind me. 389 00:15:19,459 --> 00:15:20,501 [door shuts] 390 00:15:22,209 --> 00:15:24,709 Wait, what about the eggs? 391 00:15:24,709 --> 00:15:25,959 [dramatic music plays] 392 00:15:25,959 --> 00:15:27,334 [eggs growling] 393 00:15:28,793 --> 00:15:30,209 Hyi-yah! 394 00:15:31,376 --> 00:15:33,001 [egg grunting] 395 00:15:33,001 --> 00:15:35,168 [upbeat music playing] 396 00:15:41,834 --> 00:15:42,751 [grunts] 397 00:15:44,918 --> 00:15:46,043 Lucy! 398 00:15:46,043 --> 00:15:48,001 Eggsta la vista, baby! 399 00:15:49,334 --> 00:15:51,209 - [eggs growling] - [Axatrax yelling] 400 00:15:51,209 --> 00:15:52,126 [Simon yelps] 401 00:15:53,918 --> 00:15:56,251 - [growling continues] - [yelps] 402 00:15:56,251 --> 00:15:59,334 I'll take two eggs over kablooey. 403 00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:00,459 Yippee ki-yay! 404 00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:02,001 [bubbling] 405 00:16:02,001 --> 00:16:03,668 - [soldier 1] Take him out! - [yelling] 406 00:16:03,668 --> 00:16:06,793 - [soldier 2] We need some help here! - [gavel banging] 407 00:16:06,793 --> 00:16:09,001 - [egg growls] - [shotgun blasts] 408 00:16:10,043 --> 00:16:11,918 [TOD-209] Thank you, friend. 409 00:16:13,668 --> 00:16:16,584 [grunting] 410 00:16:16,584 --> 00:16:18,501 [panting, grunts] 411 00:16:18,501 --> 00:16:21,543 How's this for bottling up my emotions, Mom? 412 00:16:21,543 --> 00:16:24,209 [yells, grunting] 413 00:16:24,793 --> 00:16:26,168 [Lucy] There's one behind you! 414 00:16:26,668 --> 00:16:27,584 I'm out. 415 00:16:30,209 --> 00:16:31,668 [growls] 416 00:16:33,043 --> 00:16:33,876 [both gasp] 417 00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:37,209 - [dramatic music playing] - [lasers zapping] 418 00:16:40,918 --> 00:16:41,876 [Lucy moans softly] 419 00:16:43,459 --> 00:16:45,418 - [egg growling] - There's one over there. 420 00:16:46,543 --> 00:16:48,168 [growling continues] 421 00:16:49,584 --> 00:16:50,584 [Axatrax exhales] 422 00:16:51,543 --> 00:16:54,209 [egg growling] 423 00:16:54,209 --> 00:16:57,834 It's just, like, Jeremy is everything I've always wanted in a guy, 424 00:16:57,834 --> 00:16:59,543 all fancy and classy. 425 00:16:59,543 --> 00:17:01,834 Isn't that a classy word, "classy"? 426 00:17:01,834 --> 00:17:03,334 I'm sorry, we're doing this now? 427 00:17:03,334 --> 00:17:04,334 [egg growling] 428 00:17:04,334 --> 00:17:05,793 You can have it! 429 00:17:06,293 --> 00:17:09,459 But I know Matty wants us to be together. Like, "together" together. 430 00:17:09,459 --> 00:17:12,168 Wow, you have to choose between being queen or First Lady. 431 00:17:12,168 --> 00:17:13,626 What a terrible burden. 432 00:17:13,626 --> 00:17:16,168 [TOD-209] Heart wants what heart wants. 433 00:17:16,168 --> 00:17:17,251 Friends. 434 00:17:17,251 --> 00:17:20,751 Yeah, it's a choice between, like, love and duty, you know? 435 00:17:20,751 --> 00:17:24,293 - That must be so hard for you. - [Lucy sighs] 436 00:17:24,293 --> 00:17:25,293 [Dr. Braun grunts] 437 00:17:25,293 --> 00:17:26,501 [growls] 438 00:17:26,501 --> 00:17:27,418 [yelps] 439 00:17:28,084 --> 00:17:29,459 [TOD-209] That new. 440 00:17:29,459 --> 00:17:32,209 [growling] 441 00:17:32,209 --> 00:17:35,793 [growling intensifies] 442 00:17:36,376 --> 00:17:38,668 Does Daveism do confessions? 443 00:17:38,668 --> 00:17:41,501 'Cause, uh, you remember when Notre-Dame burned down? 444 00:17:41,501 --> 00:17:42,626 Can you speak to the dead? 445 00:17:42,626 --> 00:17:46,251 If so, can you ask Tony! Toni! Toné! which one of them got me pregnant? 446 00:17:47,293 --> 00:17:48,959 - What's that, God? - [all gasp] 447 00:17:48,959 --> 00:17:51,751 Wow, God, that's crazy! 448 00:17:51,751 --> 00:17:53,293 Guys, God says-- 449 00:17:53,293 --> 00:17:55,418 God might just stop talking to you, boy, 450 00:17:55,418 --> 00:17:57,668 if you keep blabbing his business all over town. 451 00:17:57,668 --> 00:17:59,168 Like when The Greenville News 452 00:17:59,168 --> 00:18:01,209 published those out-of-context pictures of me 453 00:18:01,209 --> 00:18:03,043 wearing a dress and lying in a coffin. 454 00:18:03,043 --> 00:18:05,168 Mother couldn't come to the coffin store. 455 00:18:05,168 --> 00:18:07,959 Well, God says Satan is coming. 456 00:18:07,959 --> 00:18:10,001 - Like now! - [all gasp] 457 00:18:10,001 --> 00:18:11,793 - [LaMarr] Not again. - Satan? 458 00:18:11,793 --> 00:18:13,668 What if Satan comes in disguise? 459 00:18:13,668 --> 00:18:15,209 Which one of these white devils is it? 460 00:18:15,209 --> 00:18:16,918 Uh, no, you'll know him, 461 00:18:16,918 --> 00:18:19,459 because Satan has the head of a goat, 462 00:18:19,459 --> 00:18:23,501 with red eyes, and one big fang, and an antler. 463 00:18:23,501 --> 00:18:25,543 He has the arm of, like, a cat, 464 00:18:25,543 --> 00:18:27,834 but also another one that's just a bird hand, 465 00:18:27,834 --> 00:18:30,334 and he's got one bird wing, and one bat, 466 00:18:30,334 --> 00:18:31,709 and a horse leg, 467 00:18:31,709 --> 00:18:33,959 and I guess the tail is snake? 468 00:18:33,959 --> 00:18:38,001 Uh, sir, isn't that kind of just Discord from My Little Pony? 469 00:18:38,001 --> 00:18:39,459 Oh, shoot, you got me. 470 00:18:39,459 --> 00:18:42,168 I guess I'll just have to quit and turn to drugs now. Bye! 471 00:18:42,168 --> 00:18:43,418 - [loud thud] - [all gasp] 472 00:18:43,418 --> 00:18:44,501 [rumbling] 473 00:18:44,501 --> 00:18:45,668 [woman] What is that? 474 00:18:46,293 --> 00:18:47,918 [deep growl] 475 00:18:49,001 --> 00:18:51,418 You have got to be f-- 476 00:18:51,418 --> 00:18:54,876 [roars] 477 00:18:54,876 --> 00:18:56,793 That's him all right. 478 00:18:57,668 --> 00:18:59,543 What do you mean we're still missing one? 479 00:18:59,543 --> 00:19:01,709 What about the four Matty and I killed in the library? 480 00:19:01,709 --> 00:19:02,751 That's only 99. 481 00:19:02,751 --> 00:19:05,084 Then I got one that was trying on lipstick in the bathroom, 482 00:19:05,084 --> 00:19:07,709 like the girl gremlin in Gremlins 2. So that's a hundred. 483 00:19:07,709 --> 00:19:09,043 No, I got the hot egg. 484 00:19:09,043 --> 00:19:11,543 I mean, the regular egg with sexy lipstick. 485 00:19:13,001 --> 00:19:14,418 [kisses] 486 00:19:14,418 --> 00:19:15,876 [whistles sexily] 487 00:19:15,876 --> 00:19:17,126 [gun fires] 488 00:19:18,501 --> 00:19:20,751 Okay, so there's one egg left. 489 00:19:20,751 --> 00:19:22,293 Let's go get it. 490 00:19:22,293 --> 00:19:23,876 [roars] 491 00:19:23,876 --> 00:19:25,626 It's too late. 492 00:19:28,459 --> 00:19:30,459 [roars] 493 00:19:30,459 --> 00:19:33,126 - Jeez Louise. - [Simon yelps] 494 00:19:33,126 --> 00:19:36,293 - [all panting] - [growls] 495 00:19:40,084 --> 00:19:41,501 TOD, inside! 496 00:19:44,043 --> 00:19:46,168 I don't wanna be here! 497 00:19:46,168 --> 00:19:48,918 - [electric crackling] - [loud thudding] 498 00:19:48,918 --> 00:19:51,126 You guys remember the end of Gremlins 2? 499 00:19:51,126 --> 00:19:52,418 Jesus, Matty, now? 500 00:19:52,418 --> 00:19:56,001 [sighs] Okay, well, they lure the gremlins into the lobby and spray them with water... 501 00:19:56,001 --> 00:19:56,918 Spoiler alert! 502 00:19:56,918 --> 00:19:58,376 ...and electrocute them. 503 00:19:58,376 --> 00:19:59,959 We have electricity now. 504 00:19:59,959 --> 00:20:02,334 We just need to lure that thing to the big water thing 505 00:20:02,334 --> 00:20:04,001 in front of the Lincoln statue thing. 506 00:20:04,001 --> 00:20:05,668 How are we supposed to do that? 507 00:20:06,334 --> 00:20:07,501 [Axatrax sighs] 508 00:20:07,501 --> 00:20:09,668 It will be looking for its mother. 509 00:20:09,668 --> 00:20:10,959 Are you kidding me? 510 00:20:10,959 --> 00:20:13,293 No! The main guy gets those lines! 511 00:20:13,293 --> 00:20:16,126 It's not too late. Say something awesome, Matty. 512 00:20:16,126 --> 00:20:17,793 Well, buckaroos, 513 00:20:17,793 --> 00:20:20,043 looks like monsters are the food 514 00:20:20,043 --> 00:20:24,043 and humans are the teeth today, everybody. 515 00:20:24,043 --> 00:20:25,543 [Dr. Braun and Simon groan] 516 00:20:27,126 --> 00:20:28,876 - [Dave panting] - [growls] 517 00:20:28,876 --> 00:20:32,043 - David, you stop PCPing this instant. - [sniffs] 518 00:20:32,043 --> 00:20:34,168 But this is my last chance. 519 00:20:34,168 --> 00:20:36,543 Okay, just let me do, like, one more pound. 520 00:20:36,543 --> 00:20:38,959 After this, I'm never gonna have a second to myself! 521 00:20:38,959 --> 00:20:40,876 David J. Fudgesniffer, 522 00:20:40,876 --> 00:20:44,001 you may be an actual honest-to-God prophet, 523 00:20:44,001 --> 00:20:46,376 and politically, that is huge. 524 00:20:46,376 --> 00:20:48,501 Look, you seem like a nice guy, but... 525 00:20:48,501 --> 00:20:49,751 [yells] 526 00:20:49,751 --> 00:20:51,334 I think the drugs are kicking in. 527 00:20:51,334 --> 00:20:54,168 Just think of all the good we could do together. 528 00:20:54,168 --> 00:20:57,126 I could finally make it a law to stand during the national anthem 529 00:20:57,126 --> 00:20:59,126 and to kneel at all other times. 530 00:20:59,126 --> 00:21:01,918 I mean, those people will listen to anything you say. 531 00:21:01,918 --> 00:21:03,584 You're like a god to them. 532 00:21:03,584 --> 00:21:04,501 No. 533 00:21:04,501 --> 00:21:07,043 And maybe this is the PCP talking, but... 534 00:21:07,043 --> 00:21:08,418 [roars] 535 00:21:08,418 --> 00:21:11,959 - I am God! - [discord roars] 536 00:21:11,959 --> 00:21:14,959 And I'm the only one who can stop that thing 537 00:21:14,959 --> 00:21:18,001 with my God powers! 538 00:21:18,001 --> 00:21:20,834 - [yelps] Crash! - [LaMarr sighs] 539 00:21:20,834 --> 00:21:22,334 [menacing music playing] 540 00:21:24,626 --> 00:21:28,418 [discord growls] 541 00:21:32,084 --> 00:21:33,918 [roars] 542 00:21:37,251 --> 00:21:38,543 [Axatrax] Oh, snoogums. 543 00:21:38,543 --> 00:21:39,543 [growls softly] 544 00:21:39,543 --> 00:21:41,209 Come to Mommy. 545 00:21:41,209 --> 00:21:44,293 - [dramatic music playing] - [roars] 546 00:21:44,293 --> 00:21:45,668 Andiamo. 547 00:21:45,668 --> 00:21:47,251 [Vance] Eufie and I went to Italy once. 548 00:21:47,251 --> 00:21:50,251 We were on the wrong side of the bus for the Amalfi Coast. 549 00:21:51,584 --> 00:21:53,626 [roars] 550 00:21:53,626 --> 00:21:55,251 [Dr. Braun and Simon panting] 551 00:21:55,251 --> 00:21:57,876 [Matty laughs] We knew you two couldn't run all the way. 552 00:21:57,876 --> 00:22:01,293 My arches collapsed from childhood obesity. [yelps] 553 00:22:01,293 --> 00:22:02,626 [roars] 554 00:22:03,793 --> 00:22:05,168 Are you doing this? 555 00:22:05,168 --> 00:22:06,084 Doing what? 556 00:22:06,084 --> 00:22:07,376 We're falling! 557 00:22:07,376 --> 00:22:08,668 - [Vance] No! - [loud thud] 558 00:22:09,459 --> 00:22:11,459 - [dramatic music continues] - [growling] 559 00:22:13,751 --> 00:22:14,876 [snarls] 560 00:22:14,876 --> 00:22:16,668 Mommy's over here, baby. 561 00:22:16,668 --> 00:22:19,209 And so is his friend, Vance Barry. 562 00:22:19,793 --> 00:22:21,251 [roars] 563 00:22:21,251 --> 00:22:23,709 Put it in, Matty. We gotta get the tip wet. 564 00:22:23,709 --> 00:22:27,084 [chuckles] Dude, listen to yourself. How can I pass that up? 565 00:22:27,084 --> 00:22:30,043 - Then just say, "That's what she said." - That's what she said. [grunts] 566 00:22:36,668 --> 00:22:38,418 [growls] 567 00:22:38,418 --> 00:22:40,959 "It's not long enough," that's what she said. 568 00:22:42,334 --> 00:22:44,126 - [growls] - [dramatic music plays] 569 00:22:44,126 --> 00:22:45,834 [roars] 570 00:22:45,834 --> 00:22:47,543 I blame myself. 571 00:22:47,543 --> 00:22:49,084 I am sorry, Vance Barry. 572 00:22:49,084 --> 00:22:50,876 [Vance] Okay, thanks. Bye. 573 00:22:50,876 --> 00:22:52,834 [growls] 574 00:22:52,834 --> 00:22:55,043 Huh. So this is how I die. 575 00:22:55,584 --> 00:22:57,668 Take that, old gypsy I hit with my car. 576 00:22:57,668 --> 00:23:00,293 I am your God, 577 00:23:00,293 --> 00:23:03,501 and I will destroy you with my lightning! 578 00:23:03,501 --> 00:23:04,918 - [electric crackling] - [grunting] 579 00:23:04,918 --> 00:23:06,543 Ah! I'm dead. 580 00:23:07,293 --> 00:23:08,751 [gulps, growls softly] 581 00:23:09,334 --> 00:23:11,126 Well, that was never going to work. 582 00:23:11,126 --> 00:23:12,918 [roars] 583 00:23:13,751 --> 00:23:14,668 [coughs] 584 00:23:14,668 --> 00:23:15,793 [growls] 585 00:23:15,793 --> 00:23:17,459 [grunting] This isn't my head! 586 00:23:17,459 --> 00:23:19,043 Who put this head on my body?! 587 00:23:19,043 --> 00:23:20,418 I gotta get it off! 588 00:23:20,418 --> 00:23:22,501 I gotta find my real head! 589 00:23:22,501 --> 00:23:23,834 The post office took my head! 590 00:23:23,834 --> 00:23:25,543 [growls] 591 00:23:28,459 --> 00:23:29,626 [Lucy yelps] 592 00:23:29,626 --> 00:23:31,626 [in English] Oh my gosh. 593 00:23:32,126 --> 00:23:33,543 Uh, this tastes great! 594 00:23:33,543 --> 00:23:34,668 Like cream soda. 595 00:23:34,668 --> 00:23:36,584 To me, it tastes like Sam Adams. 596 00:23:36,584 --> 00:23:39,168 I think it's just whatever your favorite beverage is. 597 00:23:40,168 --> 00:23:41,584 [LaMarr] Well, well, well. 598 00:23:41,584 --> 00:23:44,376 I guess that's why they call it angel dust. 599 00:23:44,376 --> 00:23:46,084 [all chuckle] 600 00:23:46,084 --> 00:23:47,584 Thank you, that was generous. 601 00:23:47,584 --> 00:23:50,043 But Prophet Dave is dead. 602 00:23:50,043 --> 00:23:52,626 I think you mean Saint Dave. 603 00:23:53,209 --> 00:23:54,876 Y'all needed a better message. 604 00:23:54,876 --> 00:23:56,418 Well, now you have it. 605 00:23:56,418 --> 00:23:59,793 Saint Dave of Lafayette Square died for us. 606 00:24:00,501 --> 00:24:02,793 We might have to change some church names. 607 00:24:02,793 --> 00:24:04,126 I know a great chiseler. 608 00:24:04,126 --> 00:24:06,084 Hey, we did it. 609 00:24:06,084 --> 00:24:07,001 Kind of. 610 00:24:07,001 --> 00:24:09,126 I mean, we are pretty good together, right? 611 00:24:09,126 --> 00:24:10,709 Yeah, we are. 612 00:24:10,709 --> 00:24:12,334 When we're fighting aliens. 613 00:24:12,334 --> 00:24:15,001 Sure. That's what I meant too. 614 00:24:15,001 --> 00:24:16,751 [Jeremy] Oh bother. 615 00:24:16,751 --> 00:24:19,793 Bother me sideways. Did I miss all the fun? 616 00:24:19,793 --> 00:24:22,168 Oh yeah, too bad. 617 00:24:22,168 --> 00:24:26,126 We really could have used someone to tell the monster what fork to use. 618 00:24:26,126 --> 00:24:29,834 Fork? No, it's after 11. The consommé hour. 619 00:24:29,834 --> 00:24:31,001 Lucille, a moment? 620 00:24:31,001 --> 00:24:33,459 It's short for Luceline, but sure. 621 00:24:33,459 --> 00:24:34,459 Is it? 622 00:24:34,459 --> 00:24:37,459 Hey, guy, can you believe I was actually jealous of that wuss? 623 00:24:37,459 --> 00:24:39,543 [chuckles] Oh yeah. That's, uh... 624 00:24:39,543 --> 00:24:43,459 [inhales] Cool, I gotta go. Uh, my kids need me. 625 00:24:43,459 --> 00:24:45,418 Oh, wait, they probably definitely do. 626 00:24:45,418 --> 00:24:48,793 I just wanted to let you know that not being eaten by a space dragon 627 00:24:48,793 --> 00:24:51,376 was the second-best thing to happen to me today. 628 00:24:51,376 --> 00:24:53,584 Really? What was the first? 629 00:24:53,584 --> 00:24:54,918 Oh. 630 00:24:54,918 --> 00:24:56,334 I knew you could do it. 631 00:24:56,334 --> 00:24:58,876 I didn't run away here or in Vietnam. 632 00:24:58,876 --> 00:25:00,959 Now let me get a picture of the happy couple. 633 00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:01,918 What? 634 00:25:01,918 --> 00:25:04,751 Oh, you mean me and Matty. Obvs. 635 00:25:04,751 --> 00:25:05,751 Duty calls. 636 00:25:05,751 --> 00:25:08,168 [Matty chuckling] 637 00:25:08,168 --> 00:25:09,959 - Did you hear that? - Yes, Matty. 638 00:25:09,959 --> 00:25:11,668 The king said "doody." 639 00:25:11,668 --> 00:25:12,834 She gets it. 640 00:25:13,334 --> 00:25:15,376 - [heroic music plays] - [camera shutter clicks] 641 00:25:17,918 --> 00:25:21,043 [Bishop Lee] And lo, when Saint Dave was eaten by Satan, 642 00:25:21,043 --> 00:25:22,459 Jesus was like, 643 00:25:22,459 --> 00:25:25,959 "You saved Easter. Thanks, Dave." 644 00:25:25,959 --> 00:25:27,626 [congregation] Thanks, Dave! 645 00:25:27,626 --> 00:25:31,251 [liturgical music playing] 646 00:25:31,251 --> 00:25:33,334 Dave has died ♪ 647 00:25:33,334 --> 00:25:35,334 ♪ Christ is risen ♪ 648 00:25:35,334 --> 00:25:38,293 ♪ Dave and Christ were friends ♪ 649 00:25:38,293 --> 00:25:42,584 ♪ That's what Dave told LaMarr ♪ 650 00:25:42,584 --> 00:25:45,751 ♪ Friendship is magic And Jesus is friendship ♪ 651 00:25:45,751 --> 00:25:48,251 ♪ So Jesus is magic ♪ 652 00:25:48,251 --> 00:25:51,793 ♪ Happy Dave-mas, everyone... ♪ 653 00:25:51,793 --> 00:25:52,918 Happy Dave-mas! 654 00:25:52,918 --> 00:25:56,168 Is it just me, or did Christianity get weirder? 655 00:25:56,168 --> 00:25:58,584 - Yeah, and that's coming from you. - [chuckles] 656 00:25:58,584 --> 00:26:05,626 {\an8}[choir] ♪ Thank you, PCP! ♪ 657 00:26:09,543 --> 00:26:12,001 [upbeat music playing] 658 00:27:11,543 --> 00:27:13,459 [music ends]