[ music ]
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
- No one was talking.
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
- Yeah, man. No chatter to cut.
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
- Oh. Well, I kinda had my heart set on
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
telling you guys to cut the chatter so...
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
can I come in again? And maybe hear some chatter?
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
- I didn't realize we were here to meet your needs.
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
- Well guess what -- you are. - Then we can do that.
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
- Great! I'll come in again.
- Alright simmer down everybody. Let's cut the chatter.
- You see the bears last night?
[ all talking at once ]
- You see the bears last night?
- Alright calm down everybody. Let's cut the chatter!
- You see the bears last night?
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- Alright, wadda ya got for us today, Cap?
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- What I got is a big, steamin' bowl a' crime chowder.
- I said let's cut the chatter!
So grab your spoons -- let's eat.
- I said let's cut the chatter!
[ Volt, Brainstorm and AWOL bark ]
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- I digitized all those papers for you
- I said let's cut the chatter!
and uploaded them to the smartboard.
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- Oh. Well what am I supposed to do with these?
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- Recycle them?
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- [ laughs ] Absolutely not.
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- Throw them away? - Better.
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- What?!
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- Burn 'em? - Best!
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- For real?!
- I said let's cut the chatter!
- [ laughs ] Recycle them.
Oh. Okay, crime time...
- [ laughs ] Recycle them.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
off some old lady's front yard...
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Boring. - Pass.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- See... somebody hit Scary Gary
Somebody stole a garden gnome
in the head with a garden gnome...
Somebody stole a garden gnome
Oh actually, those two might be related.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Get to the good crimes!
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Okay. Gimme a sec, gimme a sec...
Somebody stole a garden gnome
somebody stole all the books from The Swellview Library...
Somebody stole a garden gnome
Pfft! Murd--
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Stole books from the library?!
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Someone's gonna fry tonight!
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Are you guys serious? - Of course we are!
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Libraries are a treasure trove of infinite knowledge.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- And adventure... - What?
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Stealing books from the library
Somebody stole a garden gnome
is not just a crime against one person.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- It's a crime against the whole community.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- And it will not stand!
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Okay, please tell me there's some kind of sick turn coming.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Only thing comin' is vengeance.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- And adventure...
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Because we love the library.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Look, the crime is already in our shopping cart,
Somebody stole a garden gnome
just hit "checkout"!
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Oh god. What a bunch of nerds.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
Alright, give me a second to read the details.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
Okay, look. See -- they didn't steal all the books.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
They left like ten copies of that one.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Hey, what book is that?
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- It is...
Somebody stole a garden gnome
Oh. My. God.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Is that you on the cover? - Yes.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- And they left it there? - Yes.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- All ten copies? - Yes.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- They literally stole every book in the library
Somebody stole a garden gnome
except yours.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Someone's gonna fry tonight! - Yes!
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- I'm hit.
Somebody stole a garden gnome
- Relax it's just-- - This is the end for ol' Bosey.
Confession time -- I'm the one that stole that garden gnome.
- Relax it's just-- - This is the end for ol' Bosey.
- Dude, you're fine. That's jelly.
- So it is.
Raspberry if I'm not mistaken.
- So it is.
- Uh-oh! Hot can.
[ ShoutOut groans ]
- Uh-oh! Hot can.
- That thing doesn't want to stay out.
- Uh-oh! Hot can.
- This wouldn't have happened if you had just recycled it!
- Uh-oh! Hot can.
- We also wouldn't be laughing so I mean...
- Uh-oh! Hot can.
[ music ]
Alright! Who's ready to break some teeth?!
[ music ]
- Always. - Ready in a bit.
[ music ]
- Just gotta do a liiittle stretching first.
[ music ]
- But I want to break teeth now!
[ music ]
- We don't even know whose teeth to break yet.
[ music ]
- Wrong! I just uploaded a list of the most likely suspects.
[ music ]
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Yeah. Plus a couple of people I just don't like.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- And they're scattered all over town.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Well we better get going.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
We got a looong night ahead of us.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
Hope you're all wearing your teeth-breaking pants!
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- One of those dots is me.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Well where were you last night? Huh?
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
Out stealing every book in Swellview except mine?!
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- I don't steal books! I'm not a monster.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- We'll see...
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- I got a better way to find the criminal.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Better than spending six to eight days
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
walking all over town, collecting criminal teeth
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
to get that sweet sweet coin from the Tooth Fairy
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
until we randomly happen upon some criminal
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
that admits to stealing the books?
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
I'd like to hear it.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Well you know that place, The Beatin' Dungeon?
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- I barely know where I am right now.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- The Beatin' Dungeon is this place
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
where villains and heroes get together
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
to fight each other for fun.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Sweeaat -- when do we go? - Tomorrow night.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
It's "Villains Only Night." - So?
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- So we get Schwoz to make up some bad guy costumes...
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- we head down to The Beatin' Dungeon...
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- And adopt a rescue dog that we bring home and say,
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
"In a way, he rescued us."
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- So close... - Was he?
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Orrrrr... we hang out and see if any criminals
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
are bragging about stealing books from the library.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- In. - Let's do this!
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- Hold up, wait a minute, let me put some captain in it.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- I don't know what that means. - Me, neither.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- He thinks he has an idea. - Can we please get a dog?
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- It means... it's up to me to point out
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
nobody ever goes to Villains Only Night.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
Check out their Fakebook Page.
- This is literally every criminal in Swellview.
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
- [ scoffs ] A better solution than spending six to eight days
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
walking all over town, collecting criminal--
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
- Yes.
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
We just have to offer something else that everyone loves.
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
- Like face painting!
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
- Yes -- face painting!
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
- Even I love a good face paint. - Everybody loves face painting.
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
VOLT: Cat eyes. - I like a good tiger, on my cheek.
- I thought of that and I have a solution.
- Wait a minute. That's not gonna work...
- It seems like it's working.
- Fine! But where are you gonna find somebody
- It seems like it's working.
to paint faces? Huh? For free!
- It seems like it's working.
- Schwoz!!! - Yes?
- It seems like it's working.
- Ahhh! - Ahhh!
- It seems like it's working.
- Can you paint faces? - Yes.
- It seems like it's working.
- For free? - Yes.
- It seems like it's working.
- We need you to go to The Beatin' Dungeon tomorrow night.
- It seems like it's working.
- Ho-kay!
- It seems like it's working.
- And you gotta make us bad guy costumes!
- It seems like it's working.
SCHWOZ: Ho-kay!
- It seems like it's working.
- And you gotta let us adopt a dog!
- It seems like it's working.
SCHWOZ: No-kay!
- It seems like it's working.
- Fine! But if I steal another garden gnome
- It seems like it's working.
to fill the void inside me it's your fault.
- It seems like it's working.
- It all just kinda happened.
[ kids all taking at once ]
- It all just kinda happened.
- Stop talking!
- It all just kinda happened.
♪ Danger ♪
- It all just kinda happened.
♪ Whoaaa-oooh ♪
- It all just kinda happened.
♪ Whoaaa-oooh ♪
- It all just kinda happened.
♪ Ooooh-ooooh ♪
- It all just kinda happened.
♪ Danger! ♪
- It all just kinda happened.
♪ One two three Force! ♪
- It all just kinda happened.
[ kids in unison ] - Emergency!
- It all just kinda happened.
- That's just the doorbell. - I know.
- It all just kinda happened.
[ music ]
- Bose! Get over here, Schwoz is giving us our bad guy costumes!
[ music ]
- Swet. We bad guys now?
[ music ]
- No, we're still good.
[ music ]
- We just gotta look bad.
[ music ]
- So we can go undercover to Villains Only Night
[ music ]
at The Beatin' Dungeon...
[ music ]
- And find whoever stole those books from the library.
[ music ]
- Okay cool!
[ music ]
I just came up with a great bad guy persona for myself.
[ music ]
I want to be "Bad Bose."
[ music ]
- That's definitely bad, but not in the way you're thinking.
[ music ]
- Oh I'm not thinking at all. That's my secret.
[ music ]
- It took me all night to make these bad guy gum balls
[ music ]
so the rule is: you get what you get and you don't get upset.
[ music ]
- I reserve the right to be upset.
[ music ]
- No frowny making. No head shaking.
[ music ]
No belly aching. No offense taking.
[ music ]
You just chew and blow and off you go.
[ music ]
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Love this. - You are Weird Beard.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
Because your beard is weiiiirrd.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
[ Miles groans ]
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Dah-dah-dah-what did I say?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- I mean, "I love it." - Good!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Why is mine so scary?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Because you're a villain -- The Mangler!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- I know but does it have to be this scary?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
What if I was something like...
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
The Pretty Bad Pony.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
Or just The Pretty Pony!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- You're The Mangler!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
This is your mangling stick.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Is this dried blood?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Yes, it will dry eventually.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Youuuu are El Stabador.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Claro que si! Y mi destino es--
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- And you are a Yerban Santa Claus
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
who takes toys from kids then punches them.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- I can do that. Do I get a bloody stick?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Yes!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Okay, time to head to The Beatin' Dungeon--
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
RAY: Caw-caw!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Ohhhh... I forgot about Ray.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
[ Batman Voice ] - Ray no longer exists.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
He's been re-hatched... as Hawkfist!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
Caw-caw!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- "Hatched?" Soooo... you were once an egg?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- I guess.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- And if you were re-hatched... that means you hatched twice?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- If that's what I said, then yes.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Do hawks even have fists? - This one does.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- So who were your parents? - I don't know,
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
a hawk and a fist -- why don't you guys shut up?
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Because we have a lot questions about... this.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- There's no time.
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
To The Beatin' Dungeon! Caw-caw!!!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Ray you can't fly!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
- Ray can't -- but Hawkfist can! Caw-caw!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
SCHWOZ: Ray, no don't!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
You'll fall down the side of the mountain!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
RAY: Ah! Ah! Ah!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
Ah-ah! Ah!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
That's...My... Face...Ow...
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
Ah! Owwww!
- Nice... - What have you done to me?
[ music ]
♪ I've got an evil, evil plan for you ♪
♪ It's evil ♪
♪ I've got an evil, evil plan for you ♪
♪ It's evil ♪
♪ I've got an evil, evil plan for you ♪
♪ IT'S EVILLLL! ♪
♪ I've got an evil, evil plan for you ♪
- Stop it.
♪ I've got an evil, evil plan for you ♪
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
For those of you that don't know, I am The Butcher
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
and I just want to give everybody a big thank you
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
for attending Villains Only Night!
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
[ villains cheer ]
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
- Whoa! Simmer down there Betty Blades...
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
- I throw rocket blades!
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
- And we love you for it.
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
But tonight is about our evil community coming together
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
to say, "Hey, we're bad people...
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
but we're still people."
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
And we must give a big thank you
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
to our free evil face painter!
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
[ villains cheer ]
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
- Yeah!
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
- Now what I want everyone to do
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
is talk to three villains you haven't talked to before,
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
because an evil stranger is just an evil friend
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
you haven't met yet.
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
So go out there and be on your worst behavior and have fun.
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
But not too much fun, okay?
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
Betty...
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
[ giggles neurotically ]
- Hello? Hi, can I have everyone's attention please?
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- 'Preciate that.
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- But do hawks... have... fists?
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- Yes!
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- I told you no one would get it.
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- I told you to shut up.
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- What about "Nighthawk?"
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- Look. You don't think that there's a day that goes by
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
that I don't regret naming myself "Hawkfist?"
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- Or maybe "Hawk-ules?"
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- Oooh, 'cuz you're a hawk but you're strong.
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
- Okay, love that.
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
New Name! I'm Hawk-ules now!
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
New name! Hawk-ules! That's me.
- No, no, I love the name "Hawkfist"...
Caw!
- Oh, I'm a reeeeeeeal bad person.
Caw!
Like... yeah.
Caw!
Sometimes I think of doing good things,
Caw!
and then I say, "Uhhh, no thank you."
Caw!
And then I do... y'know the baaaaaaad things.
Caw!
- Like what? - Hmm?
Caw!
- Like what? - Oh, you know.
Caw!
Think of the worst things that people can do.
Caw!
- Okay. - Got it.
Caw!
- Now double them.
Caw!
- Whoa! - Great!
Caw!
- Yeah. Uh-uh. That's me.
Caw!
Now while I have your ears...
Caw!
does anyone know which rascal nabbed all those books
Caw!
from The Swellview Library? Hmm? Anyone?
Caw!
Anyone know? Hmm? - No.
Caw!
- So, you know anything about all those books
that got stolen from The Swellview Library?
- So, you know anything about all those books
- Stealing books?
- So, you know anything about all those books
Na, that's too evil for me.
- So, you know anything about all those books
I'm just trying to flood a children's hospital.
- So, you know anything about all those books
- Why not just flood the whole town?
- So, you know anything about all those books
- What? - Yeah, what?
- So, you know anything about all those books
- I'm just sayin'... you wanna be evil,
- So, you know anything about all those books
blow up The Swellview Dam. You'll flood the whole town.
- So, you know anything about all those books
- No, I don't think that's a-- - Okay, that is fantastic.
- So, you know anything about all those books
- You're welcome. - I like you.
- So, you know anything about all those books
- I like me, too.
- So, you know anything about all those books
- You are going places, evil little girl.
- So, you know anything about all those books
- Maybe I'm already there.
- So, you know anything about all those books
- Hmm! - I have ideas.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- But it looks like frosting...
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- Hey hey fellas!
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
Good news for the ol' Lawn Ranger --
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
my mom says I don't have to move out of the basement!
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- Hey uhh, I know we all hate Captain Man
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
but uhh, you guys read his book?
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
It's a pretty great read.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- That dummy wrote a book?
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- It's a real page turner.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- I can't remember the title.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- Uh yeah, it's something like,
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
"Man I feel like a hero, colon,
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
"one Captain Man's journey of self-discovery, parenthesis,
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
"a Captain Man-ifesto, asterisk,
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
"the true story of the boy who became Captain Man,
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
end parentheses, exclamation point."
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
Or something like that.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- Oh, yeah! We read it in our evil book club.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
No one made it through chapter one.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- I think you mean "Cap-ter" one.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- Oh that's right! He called the chapters "Cap-ters."
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- That's so stupid.
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- You're stupid!
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
Caw-caw!
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- Hey there. - Ehhhh!
- Stop trying to eat the paintbrush!
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- No. - Wait a second.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
It could be Book-Thievin' Steven.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Oh that's right.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Are you guys talking about book-thievin'?
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
[ Villains in unison] - Steven!
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- What is going on, bad guys?
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- She was just wondering who stole all those books
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
from The Swellview Library.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Oh. Yeah. That was me.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
[ Villains laugh ]
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- I mean, I didn't take all the books.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
I left Captain Man's stupid one behind.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
BETTY BLADES: 'Course.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- So why'd you wanna know?
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- I just wanted to shake your hand!
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
Because it's such a really good crime
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
to steal books that are already free.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Wow, that's a really firm grip.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- I mean, how do you even read all those books?!
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Oh, I don't read any of them.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Oh! You don't even read them?!
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Nah. - Then what do you do with
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
all those free books that you steal?
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- [ laughs ] Ohhhh, I burn some...
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Greaaaaaat.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- I shred some... - Suuuperrrrrrrr.
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- But most of the time I just tear out the pages
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
one by one and use them to wipe my--
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
[ super-screams ]
- So, none of you know who stole those books?
- Face. I was gonna say my face.
- It's ShoutOut! - Who?
- She's not a villain. She's in Danger Force!
- It's ShoutOut! - Who?
- I'm outta here.
Byeeeeee...!
- I'm outta here.
[ music ]
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
about what to do with this member of Danger Force
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
that snuck into Villains Only Night.
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- Let's throw grass in her face!
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- No, Lawn Ranger, we're not going to--
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- Let's throw grass on her shoulders!
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- No! - Grass on her head!
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- Okay, it can't be grass every time, buddy.
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- It comes from the Earth man, it's good.
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- You know what they should do with her
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
is get a buncha' battery acid and some steak knives...
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- Stop! Honestly... - No, no, no, no...
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- We're not trying to come up with ways to hurt her.
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- We need to save her. What are we gonna do?!
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- Relax. Hawkfist has a plan.
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- I thought you changed your name to Hawkules.
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
- Oh, yeah. Then I changed it again.
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
I'm now The "'Talon'-ted Mr. Hawkley."
- Okay, okay. Now we've all got lots of evil ideas
Caw-caw!
- I do not feel good about this plan.
Caw-caw!
- Quiet! Quiet!
Caw-caw!
[ villains all talking at once ]
Caw-caw!
- Alright everybody... let's cut the chatter.
Caw-caw!
Nice. All right.
Caw-caw!
The Talon-ted Mr. Hawkley will deal with this girl.
Caw-caw!
- Who's that, Hawkfist? - Me!
Caw-caw!
- I thought you were Hawk-ules--
Caw-caw!
- Moving on! I'm gonna scratch this girl!
Caw-caw!
And she will bleeeeeed!
Caw-caw!
[ villains in unison ] - Yeah!
Caw-caw!
- Okay, ShoutOut. Get ready to feel my talon punch!
Caw-caw!
- Shouldn't your talons be on your feet?
Caw-caw!
- Oh my god whatever. Just let me do this, shut up!
Caw-caw!
C'caw!
Caw-caw!
- Oh, no! I'm being scratched.
Caw-caw!
- Yeah! Get her, Hawk-u-les!
Caw-caw!
- That's three names ago try to keep up!
Caw-caw!
- Sorry!
Caw-caw!
SHOUTOUT: I'm definitely bleeding.
Caw-caw!
Oh, but I am so very defeated!
Caw-caw!
- Ehhhhh!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
back to my lair and feed her to my baby birds.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Wait a second. - What?
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[ villains in unison ] - Ewwwwww.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- It tastes sweet.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[villains in unison ] - Huuuhhhh?
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Of course it does!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
The taste of victory is always sweet!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Yeah, but that's just jelly.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[ villains in unison ] - Ohhhhhhh.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- What? - Raspberry if I'm not mistaken.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[ villains in unison ] - Mmmmmmmm.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- The "Talon"-ted Mr. Hawkley must've used that donut!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[ villains gasp ]
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- No I didn't. - But you did, though.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- What?? - Right before you fake-scratched her.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- And un-stuck her from the wall.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
THE BUTCHER: Yeah.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Are you even a real villain, bro?
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- What does this say? Huh?
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- I have no idea.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- You kept scratching out your villain name
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
and adding new ones.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Does one of them say "Hawk-late Milk?" - Maybe.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- That's dumber than Captain Man's book.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- All right! That's it!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
Where's my dang gum?
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Are there any other members of Danger Force around here?
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Yes. But not for long.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
Byeeeeeeee!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Okay, are there any more members of Danger Force here?!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- My guy! My guy! - What are you doin--
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Right here. Call myself Brainstorm.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
'Course, my real name's B--
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[ screams ]
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- It's Volt!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[ villains gasp ]
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Alright you jerks!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
Anybody wanna make fun of my book now?!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
[ villains all talking ]
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- I hate you all.
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Get 'em!
Okay then. I'm just gonna take her
- Got it!
- Yah! - Yaahhh!
- Got it!
- Okay, I'm properly hydrated.
- Got it!
I can fight now!
- Got it!
- Yah!
- Got it!
Oh, come on!
- Ahhhhh!
Oh, come on!
- Huh! Uh!
- Ahhhhhh! - Ahhhh!
- Oh no. - No no no no no!
BOOK-THIEVIN' STEVEN: Ow!
- Oh no. - No no no no no!
- Mommy, come help meeeeeee!!!
Help me, mom!
- Mommy, come help meeeeeee!!!
- Daaaahhh! - Aaaahhhhh!!
- Ahhhh!
- Captain Man! We got him!
- Ahhhh!
- We got the book thief! - We did it!
- Ahhhh!
- Now let's see who he really is.
- Ahhhh!
- Ahhhhh! My face!
- Ahhhh!
- Brainstorm. Buddy, there's no mask.
- Ahhhh!
- Okay. So what do we do with him?
- Ahhhh!
- I have ideas.
- Ahhhh!
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Settle down, buddy.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
You're gonna be here for thirty-two Cap-ters,
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
an Epilogue, an alt ending, and a whole section at the end
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
where I teach you how to draw a cartoon version of me.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- No no no no no please!
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
Please...please!
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- But first! The introduction.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
Written by me.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Noooooooo!!!
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Hot chocolate just tastes better
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
after you catch a bad guy.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Everything does.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Honey, don't...
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Just let him.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Can I get a little hot chocolate?
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Did you catch a bad guy?
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- I saved ShoutOut.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Sooooo you caught a good guy.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Okay, that's not fair...
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Tastes pretty fair to me.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- If you could be nicer.
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
[ AWOL, Volt and ShoutOut argue ]
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
- Hey, let's cut the chatter back there!
- Please don't. I'll do anything...
Cap-ter one: The Beginning.
It all just kinda' "Captain'ed..."
Cap-ter one: The Beginning.
My father was an irresponsible scientist...
Cap-ter one: The Beginning.
and it was bring your kid to work day...
Cap-ter one: The Beginning.
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ The second I see trouble I know I'll be fine ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ I'm okay ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ I'm okaaaay! ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ Danger ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ Whoaaa-oooh ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ Whoaaa-oooh ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ Ooooh-ooooh ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ Danger! ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪
♪ One two three Force! ♪
♪ Always on the scene in the nick of time ♪