- [dramatic music playing] - [flies buzzing]
- Oh, [bleep]!
[bleep]
- Oh, my God, dude!
What the [bleep] was that, man?
[bleep] Aah!
Everything in the jungle will kill you.
You know me.
I'm Adam DeVine.
But what you don't know is that I jet-set around the globe
with my celebrity friends in search of adventure.
My ideas are so good...
[puking]
...some say they are bad!
[people screaming]
[crash]
[dramatic music playing]
I'm in the middle of the Amazon
with my good buddy Anders Holm,
co-creator and star of the hit show Workaholics.
There are a lot of things in the jungle that can kill you...
[splash]
...but we're about to go up against the scariest predator of them all,
the piranha.
Someone actually created a theme park for these little monsters
where tourists can come see them do...
what piranhas like to do.
[dramatic music playing]
Unfortunately, these piranhas have gotten out of hand,
so I volunteered Anders and I
to help wrangle some of these little suckers.
So, piranhas, uh-oh,
it's your lucky day.
The beefcake is entering the water.
It takes 400 piranhas about five minutes to completely devour a human,
and we're up against 2,000 piranhas in this lake.
So let's see...
uh, add that, carry the one and oh, yeah,
we're completely screwed.
[gargles]
Land ho!
[imitates animal call]
I wonder why they say "land ho."
- ANDERS: I don't know if you're allowed to say that in 2020.
- Yeah, it's a little insensitive.
- It's just, land lady, maybe, is a better thing.
- ADAM: The park wants to make a section of the water piranha-free
and safe for swimming,
so they asked the only two idiots dumb enough to help catch these guys
and relocate them.
We've gotten some mixed information from the locals
on how to actually do that.
So I'm gonna use by best judgment.
Excuse me, sir?
Pretty sure this is, like, the... - ANDERS: Cool.
- The guy that's gonna tell us what to do. - ANDERS: Yeah.
- ADAM: Excuse me, sir?
- [man speaking]
[man speaking]
- Yeah. Totally.
Do you speak Spanish? - No.
Do you? - Si.
First of all, he was like, "I like your hat."
- Uh-huh, Oh, great. - He didn't much care for yours.
He said that. And he said,
"Let's get in, let's stretch this net across
and save the day,"
more or less, that's what he said. - That's what he just said?
- There's no way to tell, let's get in.
- OK. - ADAM: Here we go! [grunts, mumbles]
[instrumental music playing]
Fully in the... Oh, son of a...
Oh, God, I got it in my mouth.
- ANDERS: Slippery? - I got it in my mouth.
- That's not good. - That's probably not good.
Do you want me to piss right now? - ANDERS: Do not pee right now!
I'm serious, they have a little fish out here
that swims up your penis hole
and then shoots spikes out, like... - ADAM: Uh...
It's hard to pinch it off once you start to...
Ow! Oh, [bleep].
Oh, I got hit. - What?
- Yeah, there are piranhas. Oh, [bleep].
Son of a [bleep]. Oh! Oh! Ow!
Oh! - ANDERS: [speaking indistinctly]
- Oh, I got nicked. I got nicked right there.
OK, we are clearly not as savvy as the locals
but I got a way more better idea anyways.
So I can tell that you're, like, being a bitch right now
and you're super scared and that's OK.
- I'm not scared. I'm being smart.
- So I'm gonna take this boat out and we're just gonna throw the net out
and, you know, get all the fish.
- Adam, this boat is sinking, there's... there's water in the boat.
There's piranha in the boat. Get outta there!
- ADAM: Here.
- ANDERS: You got two...
- Oh, my God! - [screaming]
- Success!
Oh! - ANDERS: Oh!
- It's OK, buddy. - It's like a family.
- Let me grab it. - ANDERS: You've lost your mind.
- What's up, little bad boy? Oh, [bleep]! - ANDERS: Yeah.
- The other one's gunning for me.
[screaming]
- You're holding a piranha.
[exclaiming]
Holy [bleep].
- You live another day.
[blowing a raspberry, kissing]
- ANDERS: Don't tease it.
- We should feed it, dude.
- ANDERS: OK, ready?
- [laughs] Oh, my God! Look at that!
Daddy's hungry! - Oh, he's got it.
- I want to go to the buffet!
Enjoy all-you-can-eat!
- There goes the boat. - Get a good nip.
- There goes the boat.
- BOTH: Pfft. [laugh]
[screams]
- ADAM: So I got a better idea.
Piranhas are man-eaters, right? - Yeah.
- And what is the most tender part of a man?
- The scrotum. - That's right.
I am going to...
Oh, my God, dude...
Right in the crotch zone.
- ANDERS: That's disgusting.
- ADAM: Maybe it's the 125-degree heat and gags
or the aroma of this rotting meat
but I am chock full of amazing bad ideas today.
[laughs]
I figure the little monsters take this ball bait,
we pull it out of the water, they're hanging on with all they got
and we ska-boom...
We got them!
Oh. That's the juicy zone and we'll tow it across the whole lake.
- OK. - ADAM: Good plan, huh?
- No, but let's do it.
- ADAM: My boy Jason Baitman out there.
- ANDERS: Very funny.
Troy McLure?
- ADAM: Oh, there! They are hitting.
There! They are hitting. - Really?
- They are hitting it! Yeah. Right there. - Dude.
- They are hitting it. Get back around.
Oh, they are chopping!
All right, the other end, Dersey. [grunts]
Come on, Jason Baitman.
OK.
Zero on the piranha front.
- Wow, that's gone. They ate the whole thing.
Whew!
- I now know what I must do.
- What do you... What do you do? What do you have to do?
You don't have to do anything. They did it.
- I think I know what I have to do, Dersey.
It's gonna be a bad idea.
[classical music playing]
God. OK. I can do this.
[clapping]
I can do this.
Whoo!
We have failed miserably today
but I have a feeling this meat thong
is guaranteed to get the job done.
[spitting]
OK, this isn't bad.
This isn't bad.
[screaming]
That was a bad... It was a bad idea!
That was a bad idea. Ders!
[funky music playing]
Oh, my God!
Ders! Aah.
No! [panting]
Oh, God!
Ders!
[speaking indistinctly]
Ders! Ders!