1 00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:07,355 ♪ 2 00:00:34,817 --> 00:00:36,862 ♪ 3 00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:46,959 ♪ 4 00:00:49,484 --> 00:00:51,094 Uh, excuse me. 5 00:00:51,138 --> 00:00:53,444 Yeah, I-I need a springtime pick-me-up project. 6 00:00:53,488 --> 00:00:56,491 My wife is kind of an "all or none" personality type, 7 00:00:56,534 --> 00:00:58,493 and right now, it seems like she's kind of stuck 8 00:00:58,536 --> 00:01:01,061 -in a "none" mode. [chuckles] -I been there. 9 00:01:01,104 --> 00:01:03,628 It happens, right? Yeah, I mean, but this is 10 00:01:03,672 --> 00:01:05,195 the first time since we've relocated, 11 00:01:05,239 --> 00:01:07,197 and-and I'm-I'm worried, you know? 12 00:01:07,241 --> 00:01:08,416 -[drill whirs] -I mean, she's usually 13 00:01:08,459 --> 00:01:10,592 in full-on "all" mode. 14 00:01:10,635 --> 00:01:12,159 -[chuckles] -Okay. 15 00:01:12,202 --> 00:01:14,335 You two looking to swap or to do group stuff? 16 00:01:14,378 --> 00:01:18,078 I know a lot of swinging couples over in Hinckley. 17 00:01:18,121 --> 00:01:19,862 Aah, gross! No. 18 00:01:19,905 --> 00:01:22,430 I meant home improvement stuff, dude. 19 00:01:22,473 --> 00:01:24,345 Where's gardening? 20 00:01:24,388 --> 00:01:26,129 [chuckles] I don't work here. 21 00:01:26,173 --> 00:01:28,305 I got this Homes-R-Us worker costume 22 00:01:28,349 --> 00:01:30,220 from Halloween Supplies next door. 23 00:01:32,309 --> 00:01:33,832 [Freddie gasps] 24 00:01:34,790 --> 00:01:36,357 My idea! 25 00:01:40,056 --> 00:01:42,014 "Parsh" is not a word. 26 00:01:42,058 --> 00:01:43,233 What? 27 00:01:43,277 --> 00:01:44,843 It's short for "partially." 28 00:01:44,887 --> 00:01:47,368 Silly. "Partially" also isn't a word. 29 00:01:47,411 --> 00:01:49,935 [JimJoe and Todd imitating weapons firing] 30 00:01:49,979 --> 00:01:51,633 -Coming at you. -JimJoe, come on, dude. 31 00:01:51,676 --> 00:01:53,243 You're playing like your dick's in the shop. 32 00:01:53,287 --> 00:01:55,811 I can beat you with my dick tied behind my back. 33 00:01:55,854 --> 00:01:57,508 What are you boys playing? 34 00:01:57,552 --> 00:01:59,119 These are SEAL Team Ninja Rock Band Sixtoys 35 00:01:59,162 --> 00:02:00,946 -from the cartoon. -Uh, hey, Ollie, 36 00:02:00,990 --> 00:02:02,818 where are your good toys? 37 00:02:02,861 --> 00:02:04,907 I impulse buy. 38 00:02:04,950 --> 00:02:06,517 Ooh, I know something you don't. 39 00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:08,389 -What? -That you're stupid. 40 00:02:08,432 --> 00:02:10,304 -What? -[scoffs] Dude. 41 00:02:10,347 --> 00:02:12,001 Shut up, JimJoe. 42 00:02:12,044 --> 00:02:14,569 Come on, she can't even do deferred gratification. 43 00:02:14,612 --> 00:02:17,702 She couldn't even pass a marshmallow test. 44 00:02:17,746 --> 00:02:19,356 What is a marshmallow test? 45 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,924 Oh, I'll have some marshmallow breast. 46 00:02:21,967 --> 00:02:23,317 A marshmallow test 47 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:25,667 is a socioeconomic pop psych bullshit thing 48 00:02:25,710 --> 00:02:27,538 where a person's projected success in life 49 00:02:27,582 --> 00:02:29,366 can be determined by whether or not 50 00:02:29,410 --> 00:02:32,108 they can delay the gratification of eating one marshmallow now 51 00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:33,762 in order to get two later. 52 00:02:33,805 --> 00:02:35,633 I can pass any marshmallow test 53 00:02:35,677 --> 00:02:37,418 and wait to eat all the marshmallows 54 00:02:37,461 --> 00:02:39,202 when I'm on my deathbed. 55 00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:40,725 Listen, I go all in. 56 00:02:40,769 --> 00:02:43,467 And if there is a mallow, whether marsh or no, 57 00:02:43,511 --> 00:02:46,166 I'm-a eat that mallow. 58 00:02:49,038 --> 00:02:52,433 [exhales, groans] 59 00:02:52,476 --> 00:02:55,044 Stock shares for Halloween stores are through the roof 60 00:02:55,087 --> 00:02:58,265 while other retail CEOs are scared shitless. 61 00:02:58,308 --> 00:03:00,267 -I'm not scared. -I'm not scared. 62 00:03:00,310 --> 00:03:01,790 I'm not scared. 63 00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:05,533 I run my company fast and loose. 64 00:03:05,576 --> 00:03:08,231 Uh, babe, remember, years ago, that idea 65 00:03:08,275 --> 00:03:10,146 of mine that I wanted to patent and sell? 66 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:13,280 It was a steel earthquake cage to go around beds? 67 00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:14,846 I wanted you to help me design it for real 68 00:03:14,890 --> 00:03:16,239 because you're an engineer 69 00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:17,588 and you know how to develop prototypes? 70 00:03:17,632 --> 00:03:19,111 Remember that? 71 00:03:19,155 --> 00:03:21,157 Uh-huh. But I told you it was a dumb idea. 72 00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:23,333 And I listened to you and moved on. 73 00:03:23,377 --> 00:03:25,509 Now, years later, 74 00:03:25,553 --> 00:03:27,685 turns out someone else in the world did my idea, 75 00:03:27,729 --> 00:03:29,252 and they got hugely rich. 76 00:03:29,296 --> 00:03:31,080 Oh, I could've been on Shark Tank. 77 00:03:31,123 --> 00:03:34,692 [groans] Okay, okay. 78 00:03:34,736 --> 00:03:37,608 I get it, Freddie. Someone else did the dumb idea. 79 00:03:37,652 --> 00:03:40,655 Well, the way I see it is, well, maybe you, 80 00:03:40,698 --> 00:03:42,352 honey, you owe me one. 81 00:03:42,396 --> 00:03:44,528 I mean, look, I have ideas, 82 00:03:44,572 --> 00:03:46,051 and you can ground them in reality. 83 00:03:46,095 --> 00:03:48,750 Babe, honey, e-everyone has fleeting ideas, 84 00:03:48,793 --> 00:03:51,361 and you? You have them all the time. 85 00:03:51,405 --> 00:03:53,015 I love that about you. 86 00:03:53,058 --> 00:03:56,018 You are a fun... dabbler, Freddie. 87 00:03:56,061 --> 00:03:58,760 It's cute and nice. 88 00:03:58,803 --> 00:04:01,284 It'll give us something to do together. 89 00:04:01,328 --> 00:04:02,633 Get you out of this funk. 90 00:04:02,677 --> 00:04:04,200 What funk? 91 00:04:08,117 --> 00:04:09,553 [groans] 92 00:04:09,597 --> 00:04:11,990 Look, Daddie Dan's on vacation, 93 00:04:12,034 --> 00:04:15,733 and he doesn't trust me to be at the awning store alone. 94 00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:17,474 The shop's closed for a week, 95 00:04:17,518 --> 00:04:20,477 and the whole thing has me feeling off, okay? 96 00:04:22,087 --> 00:04:24,089 [groans] I... 97 00:04:24,133 --> 00:04:25,743 will help you draw up the design. 98 00:04:25,787 --> 00:04:27,441 -But that's it, okay? -Yes! 99 00:04:27,484 --> 00:04:29,878 All right, let me get this set up. 100 00:04:31,445 --> 00:04:33,447 Guys, your mom and I are collaborating! 101 00:04:33,490 --> 00:04:36,406 Ah, cool-looking hang. Bye. [chuckles] 102 00:04:36,450 --> 00:04:38,974 Holy shit-dicks. 103 00:04:39,017 --> 00:04:41,716 You know the S.T.N.R.B.S. aircraft carrier toy? 104 00:04:41,759 --> 00:04:44,066 It's finally in stores. 105 00:04:44,109 --> 00:04:45,981 And I can afford it. 106 00:04:46,024 --> 00:04:47,852 -Yeah. -Uh, uh-huh. Yeah. 107 00:04:47,896 --> 00:04:50,290 -How? -I've deferred my gratification. 108 00:04:50,333 --> 00:04:52,422 I've been hoarding my Toys Or Bust gift cards 109 00:04:52,466 --> 00:04:55,033 for a few years' worth of birthdays and Christmases. 110 00:04:55,077 --> 00:04:57,558 Ollie, I bet you used your gift cards right away 111 00:04:57,601 --> 00:05:00,909 -on dumb shit. -I certainly did. 112 00:05:00,952 --> 00:05:02,911 Forget it, Ollie. I'll buy you some candy with my change. 113 00:05:02,954 --> 00:05:03,955 Let's go. 114 00:05:05,435 --> 00:05:08,177 Okay, Joan of Arc candles. She's tied to the stake. 115 00:05:08,220 --> 00:05:11,223 -It's all a candle, and... -I get it. Pass. 116 00:05:11,267 --> 00:05:13,225 All right. Salem witch. 117 00:05:13,269 --> 00:05:14,792 Salem witches tied to the stake. 118 00:05:14,836 --> 00:05:17,795 It's all a candle, but this one... 119 00:05:17,839 --> 00:05:19,231 Pass on all candles. 120 00:05:23,192 --> 00:05:24,976 Well, that's it. 121 00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:26,630 Pass on all of them. So... 122 00:05:26,674 --> 00:05:28,415 All right, I'll get my journals. I got 123 00:05:28,458 --> 00:05:30,547 tons of ideas in them. This is so fun, sweetie. 124 00:05:30,591 --> 00:05:32,549 Look, and maybe after we land on the hit idea, 125 00:05:32,593 --> 00:05:36,336 we can do sex stuff to truly make this a top-shelf day. 126 00:05:40,078 --> 00:05:41,384 Had to bring the wagon 127 00:05:41,428 --> 00:05:42,820 for my future swaggin' aircraft carrier. 128 00:05:42,864 --> 00:05:44,387 [Shauna and JimJoe gasp] 129 00:05:44,431 --> 00:05:47,521 Wait, what? Toys Or Bust is gone? 130 00:05:47,564 --> 00:05:49,218 And it's already a Halloween store? 131 00:05:49,261 --> 00:05:50,698 But it's spring. 132 00:05:50,741 --> 00:05:53,396 [laughs] 133 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:55,485 I ate all my marshmallows, 134 00:05:55,529 --> 00:05:59,576 and now Todd only has IOUs for extinct marshmallows. 135 00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:01,622 [laughs] My short game 136 00:06:01,665 --> 00:06:04,712 beat your long game. Ha ha, ha ha. 137 00:06:04,755 --> 00:06:07,845 I eat your marshmallows! 138 00:06:07,889 --> 00:06:10,282 [chuckles]: Oh, I'll prove you wrong. 139 00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:14,983 I vow: I will use my gift cards. 140 00:06:15,984 --> 00:06:17,507 Aha! DivaCup. 141 00:06:17,551 --> 00:06:20,423 -It's been done. -Diva s-saucer? 142 00:06:20,467 --> 00:06:23,121 -It's what you put it on when you take it out. -Pass. 143 00:06:23,165 --> 00:06:24,645 Sidesaddle toilets. 144 00:06:24,688 --> 00:06:27,169 And then there's, uh, the Cough Keeper. 145 00:06:27,212 --> 00:06:29,650 -Wait. Wait, wait. What's that one? -Well, you know 146 00:06:29,693 --> 00:06:31,695 how I hate hearing someone cough, right? 147 00:06:33,523 --> 00:06:36,396 Yes. It's-it's-it's... 148 00:06:36,439 --> 00:06:39,442 It's a little soundproof face mask 149 00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:42,184 one can bring up to their mouth for a cough. 150 00:06:42,227 --> 00:06:45,274 Or-or-or one could just wear it all the time 151 00:06:45,317 --> 00:06:48,495 so as not to annoy others with their nagging cough. 152 00:06:48,538 --> 00:06:49,887 Yes! 153 00:06:49,931 --> 00:06:52,586 Now, this one I can work with. Yeah! 154 00:06:52,629 --> 00:06:54,239 All right, get me casting polymer, 155 00:06:54,283 --> 00:06:56,198 resin, and clear this table 156 00:06:56,241 --> 00:06:57,765 so we can have sex on it. 157 00:06:57,808 --> 00:07:01,333 And then I'm gonna start on this Cough Keeper idea. 158 00:07:01,377 --> 00:07:02,813 All right! [whoops] 159 00:07:02,857 --> 00:07:04,249 All right, I'll get your activation juice: 160 00:07:04,293 --> 00:07:06,034 triple espresso, French vanilla creamer, 161 00:07:06,077 --> 00:07:08,906 a shot of Fireball and a towel to put down for the sex. 162 00:07:08,950 --> 00:07:11,169 Okay, Freddie, do you really want 163 00:07:11,213 --> 00:07:13,868 to activate this side of me? 164 00:07:13,911 --> 00:07:16,697 'Cause I will go fast and loose, and I'll push it through. 165 00:07:16,740 --> 00:07:20,527 I am "all or none," buddy, and I am ready to go all in. 166 00:07:20,570 --> 00:07:23,138 Go all in, baby. 167 00:07:31,015 --> 00:07:34,018 ♪ 168 00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:41,417 [thunder rumbles] 169 00:07:42,418 --> 00:07:44,420 [Debbie grunts] 170 00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:46,509 [smacking] 171 00:07:50,165 --> 00:07:52,559 -Try it out, babe. -[coughs] 172 00:07:52,602 --> 00:07:54,865 [coughs inaudibly] 173 00:07:54,909 --> 00:07:57,955 -[whoops] Yes! We did it! -Yes! We did it! 174 00:08:00,523 --> 00:08:01,872 Okay, babe, the next steps are crucial. 175 00:08:01,916 --> 00:08:03,352 Got to slow down a bit, 176 00:08:03,395 --> 00:08:05,180 secure that patent and do safety testing, 177 00:08:05,223 --> 00:08:07,574 all parts of the plan to get us on Shark Tank. 178 00:08:07,617 --> 00:08:09,750 Mom, I got these gift cards... 179 00:08:09,793 --> 00:08:11,055 No! 180 00:08:11,099 --> 00:08:13,754 Mommy is busy making inventions. 181 00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:15,364 See? Right? 182 00:08:15,407 --> 00:08:18,236 -Don't bother Mommy. [chuckles] -Ugh. 183 00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:20,412 Looks like Mom is in the "all in" mode again. 184 00:08:20,456 --> 00:08:21,936 Better back off. 185 00:08:21,979 --> 00:08:23,285 [chuckles] Listen, kids, 186 00:08:23,328 --> 00:08:24,852 your mom is, uh, really busy right now, 187 00:08:24,895 --> 00:08:26,984 and I-I got to be her model and her Igor 188 00:08:27,028 --> 00:08:30,335 and chef and masseuse, so just-just stay together. 189 00:08:32,773 --> 00:08:34,818 [thunder rumbling] 190 00:08:35,776 --> 00:08:37,255 Wipe down, monkey dick, 191 00:08:37,299 --> 00:08:38,779 and use your "Galaxy Nut Book" 192 00:08:38,822 --> 00:08:40,955 to find me an open Toys Or Bust. 193 00:08:40,998 --> 00:08:43,958 Oh, uh, supposedly, there's a Toys Or Bust 194 00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:47,222 -that hasn't closed in the next town over. -[phone chimes] 195 00:08:47,265 --> 00:08:50,007 -In Hinckley. -Hinckley? 196 00:08:50,051 --> 00:08:52,532 That town has more perverts and serial killers 197 00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:54,446 per square mile than anywhere else. 198 00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:56,579 Oh, are you scared? 199 00:08:56,623 --> 00:08:59,756 Yes. It's smart to be scared of scary things, JimJoe. 200 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:02,237 I'm going. Todd promised me candy, 201 00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:04,108 and I want to see these cereal killers 202 00:09:04,152 --> 00:09:05,719 killing up some cereal. 203 00:09:05,762 --> 00:09:08,025 -I'll go just to hang with Ollie. -Rad. 204 00:09:08,069 --> 00:09:11,812 Let's see who's right about this marshmallow test thing. 205 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,425 [thunder rumbling] 206 00:09:16,468 --> 00:09:20,168 My bike seat is making my butt so mad. 207 00:09:22,126 --> 00:09:24,433 Are you fucking shitting me?! 208 00:09:24,476 --> 00:09:26,740 These Halloween stores are like a zombie pandemic 209 00:09:26,783 --> 00:09:28,437 for businesses. What's it take 210 00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:30,395 -to get an aircraft carrier? -[motorcycle approaching] 211 00:09:30,439 --> 00:09:32,006 Kids, is that our principal? 212 00:09:34,008 --> 00:09:36,314 [Ollie grunts] 213 00:09:37,272 --> 00:09:39,056 [tires screech] 214 00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:42,190 [tires squeal] 215 00:09:47,238 --> 00:09:49,980 [tires squeal] 216 00:09:54,637 --> 00:09:58,380 By chance, are you kids students at my school? 217 00:09:58,423 --> 00:09:59,773 KIDS: Yes. 218 00:09:59,816 --> 00:10:01,470 Right. Right, right. Right. 219 00:10:01,513 --> 00:10:04,038 Say, um, how about I give you kids 220 00:10:04,081 --> 00:10:07,432 just a smattering of things from my wallet, 221 00:10:07,476 --> 00:10:10,131 and-and you don't have to mention my little transaction 222 00:10:10,174 --> 00:10:12,786 to your teachers or parents. 223 00:10:12,829 --> 00:10:15,049 What was your little transaction? 224 00:10:15,092 --> 00:10:18,356 If I tell you, then you're part of it. 225 00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:21,925 So... do I tell you? 226 00:10:21,969 --> 00:10:23,666 KIDS: No. 227 00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:25,189 [thunder rumbling] 228 00:10:26,190 --> 00:10:27,714 [tires squeal] 229 00:10:27,757 --> 00:10:29,498 These are all gift cards. Masseuse. 230 00:10:29,541 --> 00:10:31,848 Florist. Stationery store. 231 00:10:31,892 --> 00:10:33,676 Greyhound breeder. Tailor. 232 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,244 Florist. Playstuff? 233 00:10:36,287 --> 00:10:38,246 Oh, I have heard of Playstuff. 234 00:10:38,289 --> 00:10:42,250 Yes. It is a toy store on the other side of Hinckley. 235 00:10:42,293 --> 00:10:45,688 Maybe it's just not registered on phones yet. 236 00:10:45,732 --> 00:10:47,777 Could be, like, a Toys Or Bust offshoot? 237 00:10:47,821 --> 00:10:49,387 Like babyGap? 238 00:10:49,431 --> 00:10:51,085 Fine. 239 00:10:53,087 --> 00:10:56,133 -[mutters, laughs] -Uh, hey, babe? 240 00:10:56,177 --> 00:10:57,700 Maybe we should think about taking breaks, 241 00:10:57,744 --> 00:11:00,224 slowing down. You know, sleeping. 242 00:11:00,268 --> 00:11:02,183 -[chuckles] -"We." 243 00:11:02,226 --> 00:11:04,838 [laughing]: Okay. 244 00:11:04,881 --> 00:11:06,143 All right. 245 00:11:06,187 --> 00:11:08,276 Wego fast. Okay? 246 00:11:08,319 --> 00:11:12,149 We push these Cough Keepers through into manufacturing. 247 00:11:12,193 --> 00:11:14,717 I've lined up a few factories to start pumping 'em out. 248 00:11:14,761 --> 00:11:16,327 [chuckles]: Really? Wow. 249 00:11:16,371 --> 00:11:18,416 Uh, yeah, okay, but maybe we should, uh, talk 250 00:11:18,460 --> 00:11:20,505 about doing the safety tests first? 251 00:11:20,549 --> 00:11:21,898 Already blasted through some of those 252 00:11:21,942 --> 00:11:24,379 with computer simulations. Take a look. 253 00:11:24,422 --> 00:11:26,250 [coughs] 254 00:11:26,294 --> 00:11:28,296 [coughs inaudibly] 255 00:11:28,339 --> 00:11:32,343 That-that seems a little oversimplified, no? 256 00:11:32,387 --> 00:11:34,302 We go ahead with production. 257 00:11:34,345 --> 00:11:36,652 I got to get some inventory fast 258 00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:39,699 because I've already advertised the product on Instagram. 259 00:11:39,742 --> 00:11:42,789 Boom! 1,000 orders! 260 00:11:42,832 --> 00:11:45,313 See? I can't wait for the gratification 261 00:11:45,356 --> 00:11:47,054 of seeing these in the market. 262 00:11:47,097 --> 00:11:48,403 Uh, but maybe we should delay 263 00:11:48,446 --> 00:11:49,796 -that gratification a little. -No! 264 00:11:49,839 --> 00:11:51,493 Look, 265 00:11:51,536 --> 00:11:53,495 I'm just trying to stress test this thing, babe. 266 00:11:53,538 --> 00:11:57,281 But you're rushing like you always kind of do. 267 00:11:57,325 --> 00:12:00,241 Sweetie, look, th-this part of the process 268 00:12:00,284 --> 00:12:03,244 may just be a little outside of your expertise. 269 00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:05,333 You know, even at the appliance factory, 270 00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:08,771 you were the genius engineer who fixed conveyor belts 271 00:12:08,815 --> 00:12:10,817 and designed assembly robots. 272 00:12:10,860 --> 00:12:13,036 You were not the people who invented 273 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:16,344 the actual appliances that were tested and sold, right? 274 00:12:16,387 --> 00:12:17,693 Uh... 275 00:12:19,477 --> 00:12:22,132 [laughs] This coming from a guy 276 00:12:22,176 --> 00:12:24,656 who tries different careers every six months. 277 00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:27,659 You get excited. Get involved. 278 00:12:27,703 --> 00:12:29,313 Get in over your head, 279 00:12:29,357 --> 00:12:31,881 so you cry and quit. Over and over. 280 00:12:31,925 --> 00:12:33,840 You overthink things to death. 281 00:12:33,883 --> 00:12:36,233 You delay too long, and the moment passes. 282 00:12:37,191 --> 00:12:38,758 And I console you. 283 00:12:38,801 --> 00:12:41,848 Then, after a while, you find something else. 284 00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:43,719 Always crashing and burning. 285 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,286 And you want to give up like you always do? 286 00:12:45,329 --> 00:12:47,941 [chuckles]: Well, you can, but I'm not. 287 00:12:47,984 --> 00:12:49,638 Babe, I mean... [sighs] 288 00:12:49,681 --> 00:12:52,162 All-all that mean stuff is so true about me, 289 00:12:52,206 --> 00:12:53,816 but you're not listening. 290 00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:56,471 I-I don't want to give up. I just want to slow down. 291 00:12:56,514 --> 00:12:57,689 You're fired. 292 00:13:01,476 --> 00:13:05,175 This is for adult toys, Joshathon. 293 00:13:05,219 --> 00:13:07,830 Oh, like a body whistle shop? 294 00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:11,094 The only toy stores left in America are for adults. 295 00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:13,314 Now, Todd, they do have cool toys 296 00:13:13,357 --> 00:13:14,794 at Halloween Supplies, man. 297 00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:17,927 You are such a fucking idiot, Ollie. 298 00:13:17,971 --> 00:13:20,756 Whoa, man. No. That's too far. 299 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:24,412 [chuckles softly] JimJoe, can I talk to you for a sec? 300 00:13:24,455 --> 00:13:27,110 Listen, I know you're smart, 301 00:13:27,154 --> 00:13:28,895 and you've known me for a long-ass time, 302 00:13:28,938 --> 00:13:31,898 so I know that you know that I'm serious as hell 303 00:13:31,941 --> 00:13:34,117 when I say if you insult my friend Ollie again, 304 00:13:34,161 --> 00:13:35,815 I'm gonna fuck your ass all the way up 305 00:13:35,858 --> 00:13:37,512 in a way that ruins the rest of your life. 306 00:13:37,555 --> 00:13:39,079 Physically, financially and socially. 307 00:13:39,122 --> 00:13:40,384 You hear me, boy? 308 00:13:40,428 --> 00:13:43,648 I-I hear you, Ms. Shauna. 309 00:13:43,692 --> 00:13:45,215 [chuckles] I thought you would. 310 00:13:45,259 --> 00:13:48,262 Glad we could have this talk, Jimmy-Joseph. 311 00:13:48,305 --> 00:13:50,264 Hand me that gift card to Playstuff. 312 00:13:50,307 --> 00:13:51,874 We might at least cash it in. 313 00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:54,311 Hey! Hey, mister? 314 00:13:54,355 --> 00:13:56,574 Hey. We won this gift card on the radio, 315 00:13:56,618 --> 00:13:58,881 but we're kids, so it's worthless to us. 316 00:13:58,925 --> 00:14:00,883 It says it's for 69 bucks. 317 00:14:00,927 --> 00:14:02,319 Would you like it for $40? 318 00:14:02,363 --> 00:14:04,060 Yeah, all right. Cool. 319 00:14:05,018 --> 00:14:08,369 This is my $40 for riding over here in the rain 320 00:14:08,412 --> 00:14:10,327 -for nothing. -JOE: Hey! 321 00:14:10,371 --> 00:14:11,894 There's only two bucks left on that card. 322 00:14:11,938 --> 00:14:13,461 I want my money back. 323 00:14:13,504 --> 00:14:15,550 [kids grunting, panting] 324 00:14:17,508 --> 00:14:18,945 [grunts, groans] 325 00:14:20,947 --> 00:14:23,297 [sighs] We're down to our nuclear option. 326 00:14:23,340 --> 00:14:25,603 Let's go back and ask Mom to help. 327 00:14:25,647 --> 00:14:27,692 [thunder rumbling] 328 00:14:35,962 --> 00:14:37,311 Dad, where's Mom? 329 00:14:37,354 --> 00:14:38,703 I need her to help prove to Ollie 330 00:14:38,747 --> 00:14:40,357 that I was right to hoard my gift cards. 331 00:14:40,401 --> 00:14:42,055 Nope. She'll help me prove 332 00:14:42,098 --> 00:14:44,709 you're just a big, old stick in the mud. 333 00:14:44,753 --> 00:14:47,190 Debbie? Oh, no. 334 00:14:47,234 --> 00:14:48,844 You don't want her right now. 335 00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:50,890 When she's in the "all in" mode, 336 00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:53,631 she can't stop it. Can't control it. 337 00:14:53,675 --> 00:14:55,590 She goes into a mania. 338 00:14:55,633 --> 00:14:58,201 Oh, she says she'll dazzle us. 339 00:14:58,245 --> 00:15:00,682 And sometimes, well, she's right. 340 00:15:00,725 --> 00:15:02,336 And it's glorious. 341 00:15:02,379 --> 00:15:04,164 And you're like a moth to her flame. 342 00:15:04,207 --> 00:15:05,556 [chuckles]: Oh. 343 00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:08,690 But you're dancing on a knife blade. 344 00:15:08,733 --> 00:15:11,606 Could be all good, or could be all of us 345 00:15:11,649 --> 00:15:14,565 get taken down with her in a fast and loose crash. 346 00:15:14,609 --> 00:15:17,264 So, do you know where we can cash in Todd's gift cards 347 00:15:17,307 --> 00:15:18,830 or not? God. 348 00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:21,268 -[door opens] -DEBBIE: If it can be done... 349 00:15:21,311 --> 00:15:22,530 [thunder rumbles] 350 00:15:22,573 --> 00:15:24,880 ...I can do it. 351 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,577 [JimJoe whimpers] 352 00:15:26,621 --> 00:15:30,842 So, you kids help me distribute these to local shops, 353 00:15:30,886 --> 00:15:34,455 and I'll force Toys Or Bust to redeem your cards. 354 00:15:34,498 --> 00:15:36,979 [thunder rumbles] 355 00:15:37,023 --> 00:15:39,895 ♪ 356 00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:04,485 [indistinct chatter] 357 00:16:16,062 --> 00:16:17,846 [line rings] 358 00:16:17,889 --> 00:16:19,326 Hello. Who's this? 359 00:16:19,369 --> 00:16:21,415 Yeah, is this the CEO of Toys Or Bust? 360 00:16:21,458 --> 00:16:25,201 Ex-CEO of Toys Or Bust, actually. 361 00:16:25,245 --> 00:16:28,639 Listen up, pal. I got... 362 00:16:28,683 --> 00:16:31,642 four gift cards to your store. 363 00:16:31,686 --> 00:16:33,383 What am I supposed to do with them? 364 00:16:33,427 --> 00:16:36,691 Well, I can't do anything about the gift cards. 365 00:16:36,734 --> 00:16:38,998 I don't have a company anymore. 366 00:16:39,041 --> 00:16:40,956 I don't have any stores. 367 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,219 They've all been morphed into Halloween stores, 368 00:16:43,263 --> 00:16:45,482 pretty much, overnight. 369 00:16:45,526 --> 00:16:48,790 Listen, my kid wants the goddamn... 370 00:16:48,833 --> 00:16:52,054 -KIDS: S.T.N.R.B.S. aircraft carrier toy. -...aircraft carrier toy. 371 00:16:52,098 --> 00:16:57,016 [sighs] Why not just buy that 372 00:16:57,059 --> 00:17:01,585 at Walmart or Target or Amazon, for Christ's sake, 373 00:17:01,629 --> 00:17:03,631 like a normal human being? 374 00:17:03,674 --> 00:17:05,067 Okay, let me ask you something. 375 00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:07,678 Why did you get into the toy business 376 00:17:07,722 --> 00:17:08,810 in the beginning? 377 00:17:08,853 --> 00:17:12,379 To make kids happy, I guess. 378 00:17:12,422 --> 00:17:14,076 Know what makes kids unhappy? 379 00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:17,079 No one will redeem these cards. 380 00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:21,083 It is a racket. A scam. A crime. 381 00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:24,652 Tons of kids like Todd have been cheated out of birthday gifts 382 00:17:24,695 --> 00:17:27,872 and holiday gifts by you, dude. 383 00:17:27,916 --> 00:17:29,309 You failed. 384 00:17:29,352 --> 00:17:32,529 You have hurt kids all over this country. 385 00:17:32,573 --> 00:17:35,010 And if you want to go out the right way, 386 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:39,232 you are gonna go buy an aircraft carrier from Amazon, 387 00:17:39,275 --> 00:17:41,843 express ship that bitch and meet me 388 00:17:41,886 --> 00:17:43,540 in a Halloween Supplies parking lot 389 00:17:43,584 --> 00:17:47,762 to make a final exchange for my boy's goddamn gift cards! 390 00:17:47,805 --> 00:17:50,678 Okay, you're right. Okay. Okay. 391 00:17:52,027 --> 00:17:55,596 Wow. Your mom is a super dick. 392 00:17:55,639 --> 00:17:57,250 [tires screech] 393 00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:08,130 I told you my long game is better than your short game. 394 00:18:08,174 --> 00:18:11,481 I waited, and you played fast and loose. [laughs] 395 00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:12,917 You were impulsive. 396 00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:14,615 You didn't pass this marshmallow test. 397 00:18:14,658 --> 00:18:16,269 You laughed in my face before. 398 00:18:16,312 --> 00:18:18,314 Now I'm laughing in yours. 399 00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:22,101 [laughs] I'm smart, and you're... 400 00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:23,754 [crying]: Stupid? 401 00:18:23,798 --> 00:18:26,453 You think I'm stupid? 402 00:18:26,496 --> 00:18:28,107 Maybe you're right. 403 00:18:28,150 --> 00:18:29,847 Maybe I am. 404 00:18:29,891 --> 00:18:31,371 [grunts] 405 00:18:31,414 --> 00:18:33,286 Wait, Ollie, I only meant about the gift cards. 406 00:18:33,329 --> 00:18:35,375 [Ollie crying] 407 00:18:36,550 --> 00:18:40,684 Todd, that was too far. 408 00:18:40,728 --> 00:18:42,164 You gonna fuck him up, Shauna? 409 00:18:42,208 --> 00:18:44,079 I'm gonna let this one play itself out. 410 00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:45,863 It's a sibling thing. 411 00:18:45,907 --> 00:18:48,910 Oh, Ollie. 412 00:18:48,953 --> 00:18:52,479 Lady, you're a real piece of work. 413 00:18:52,522 --> 00:18:55,960 Well, don't you feel better? 414 00:18:56,004 --> 00:18:57,745 Little bit? 415 00:18:57,788 --> 00:19:00,051 I don't think so. 416 00:19:00,095 --> 00:19:01,749 I lost my company 417 00:19:01,792 --> 00:19:03,925 because I went fast, went all in. 418 00:19:03,968 --> 00:19:08,364 I guess I didn't pass the marshmallow test either, son. 419 00:19:08,408 --> 00:19:10,323 I hope you enjoy 420 00:19:10,366 --> 00:19:12,455 your SEAL Team Ninja Rock Band Sixaircraft carrier. 421 00:19:12,499 --> 00:19:15,284 That S.T.N.R.B.S.... 422 00:19:15,328 --> 00:19:17,373 is a damn fine show. 423 00:19:22,596 --> 00:19:23,858 Ollie? 424 00:19:23,901 --> 00:19:26,165 -Freddie? -[phone chimes] 425 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:28,210 Oh. 426 00:19:28,254 --> 00:19:30,256 I'm Marion Bronch, scientific health lawyer, 427 00:19:30,299 --> 00:19:32,388 and I'm putting together a class action case 428 00:19:32,432 --> 00:19:34,216 for anyone harmed by the Cough Keeper. 429 00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:36,175 Turns out this very new product 430 00:19:36,218 --> 00:19:38,307 has harmed consumers very quickly. 431 00:19:38,351 --> 00:19:40,483 See, the soundproof material is porous, 432 00:19:40,527 --> 00:19:42,920 so it's like a petri dish that collects mucus. 433 00:19:42,964 --> 00:19:45,836 It gives people respiratory infections, okay? 434 00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:48,448 And those people have all returned the Cough Keepers, 435 00:19:48,491 --> 00:19:51,494 and now there's a probable lawsuit pending. 436 00:19:53,104 --> 00:19:56,064 I feel really bad about what I said to Ollie. 437 00:19:56,107 --> 00:19:58,153 Yeah. I think I, uh... 438 00:19:58,197 --> 00:19:59,937 Oh, man. 439 00:19:59,981 --> 00:20:04,899 I-I made your dad feel really terrible, too. 440 00:20:04,942 --> 00:20:06,466 What do we do? 441 00:20:06,509 --> 00:20:09,947 We do what we always do when we've been awful. 442 00:20:09,991 --> 00:20:12,820 We turn awesome. 443 00:20:23,091 --> 00:20:24,266 [door closes] 444 00:20:24,310 --> 00:20:26,094 Freddie. 445 00:20:26,137 --> 00:20:28,966 Babe, I apologize. 446 00:20:29,010 --> 00:20:32,709 I was wrong. 447 00:20:32,753 --> 00:20:34,363 Do you think I'm stupid? 448 00:20:34,407 --> 00:20:37,105 Oh, no, honey. 449 00:20:37,148 --> 00:20:39,977 I got thrown into my "off" mode 450 00:20:40,021 --> 00:20:42,937 when Dad didn't trust me to run the shop while he was gone. 451 00:20:42,980 --> 00:20:46,506 And then the thought of wowing the world with your idea 452 00:20:46,549 --> 00:20:48,638 threw me back into the "all in" mode, 453 00:20:48,682 --> 00:20:51,119 and when I'm in my "all in" mode, 454 00:20:51,162 --> 00:20:52,512 you know, babe, I go fast, 455 00:20:52,555 --> 00:20:55,036 and I don't value anyone's opinion. Right? 456 00:20:55,079 --> 00:20:56,733 [chuckles] It's the mode talking. 457 00:20:56,777 --> 00:20:59,562 But I apologize for the mode, too. 458 00:20:59,606 --> 00:21:02,043 Well, tell the mode thanks. 459 00:21:02,086 --> 00:21:05,960 Freddie, it is okay that you go slow 460 00:21:06,003 --> 00:21:08,092 and that you try things out 461 00:21:08,136 --> 00:21:10,007 and drop them if they don't feel right. 462 00:21:10,051 --> 00:21:12,271 You're never gonna drop being who you are, 463 00:21:12,314 --> 00:21:14,577 and that's the only thing that matters. 464 00:21:14,621 --> 00:21:17,493 And I should not try to hurt the ones I love 465 00:21:17,537 --> 00:21:21,410 by insulting the things that I love about them. 466 00:21:21,454 --> 00:21:22,846 [Freddie crying] 467 00:21:22,890 --> 00:21:24,457 Okay. 468 00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:26,415 Okay. Thank you. 469 00:21:26,459 --> 00:21:29,462 -[sniffles] -[sighs] Come on. 470 00:21:29,505 --> 00:21:32,029 [sighs] Aw. 471 00:21:32,073 --> 00:21:33,553 You think I'm stupid? 472 00:21:33,596 --> 00:21:35,294 No, Ollie. You're not stupid. I-If anything, 473 00:21:35,337 --> 00:21:37,165 I am for making you feel that way. 474 00:21:37,208 --> 00:21:39,080 We're just opposites. 475 00:21:39,123 --> 00:21:41,822 I know I should be more like you. 476 00:21:41,865 --> 00:21:43,998 I disagree. I should be more like you. 477 00:21:44,041 --> 00:21:45,608 More in the moment. 478 00:21:45,652 --> 00:21:48,611 We should eat some marshmallows in the present, 479 00:21:48,655 --> 00:21:50,309 and we can save some for later. 480 00:21:50,352 --> 00:21:52,572 It's all about balance, right? 481 00:21:52,615 --> 00:21:57,141 Oh, that is good advice, Toddie. 482 00:21:57,185 --> 00:22:00,884 And you know what? I'm gonna try not to be so "all or none." 483 00:22:00,928 --> 00:22:04,758 I'm gonna try to collaborate and work well with others. Huh? 484 00:22:04,801 --> 00:22:07,238 Starting right now. Because we got a lawsuit, 485 00:22:07,282 --> 00:22:09,197 and thanks to me, we got to find a way to break even. 486 00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,286 ♪ 487 00:22:28,825 --> 00:22:31,393 -[kids imitating weapons firing] -Die! Die! 488 00:22:31,437 --> 00:22:33,874 [chuckles] Die! Die! 489 00:22:33,917 --> 00:22:35,919 -JOSHATHON: Pew, pew. -In other news, 490 00:22:35,963 --> 00:22:37,617 stocks continue to soar for Halloween stores, 491 00:22:37,660 --> 00:22:38,835 who are now selling a new version 492 00:22:38,879 --> 00:22:40,010 of a COVID costume mask. 493 00:22:40,054 --> 00:22:41,272 We were sold a few of these, 494 00:22:41,316 --> 00:22:43,057 and with a little safety testing, 495 00:22:43,100 --> 00:22:44,972 they were good to mass manufacture. 496 00:22:45,015 --> 00:22:46,887 It's a great idea. 497 00:22:46,930 --> 00:22:49,106 What? 498 00:22:54,721 --> 00:22:58,115 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 499 00:23:29,146 --> 00:23:33,146 Chirp.