1 00:00:01,209 --> 00:00:02,792 Sazz was my friend. 2 00:00:02,793 --> 00:00:04,085 We're trying to solve her murder. 3 00:00:04,086 --> 00:00:06,296 Right. For your podcast. 4 00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:11,009 - Ben Glenroy? - Ben's dead! 5 00:00:11,010 --> 00:00:13,845 I'm Glen Stubbins, Ben's stunt double. 6 00:00:13,846 --> 00:00:15,513 Can ya help me get a job on your film? 7 00:00:15,514 --> 00:00:17,765 You lost your stunt double. I lost my acting double. 8 00:00:17,766 --> 00:00:19,642 We could make each other whole again. 9 00:00:19,643 --> 00:00:21,185 Oh God, they've been shot! 10 00:00:21,186 --> 00:00:22,895 It's Glen! He's still alive! 11 00:00:22,896 --> 00:00:24,814 Stubbins is stable, but unconscious. 12 00:00:24,815 --> 00:00:27,608 The bullet struck the plate in his head and deflected to Gali-fine-akis. 13 00:00:27,609 --> 00:00:30,778 I sign on to your crazy for a lifetime. 14 00:00:30,779 --> 00:00:33,031 You're giving me a doll's bracelet? 15 00:00:33,032 --> 00:00:37,410 I'm proposing to you, Oliver. I wanna marry you. 16 00:00:37,411 --> 00:00:40,204 We're getting married this weekend! 17 00:00:40,205 --> 00:00:43,750 Sazz figured this all out. Maybe that's what she wanted to tell me. 18 00:00:43,751 --> 00:00:46,461 I vanted to tell you something about your friend, Sazz. 19 00:00:46,462 --> 00:00:48,004 She was on the ham radio, 20 00:00:48,005 --> 00:00:50,798 asking about all dese huge plot holes you had in your podcast. 21 00:00:50,799 --> 00:00:54,594 You're how Sazz knew about all the West Tower stuff in her notes. 22 00:00:54,595 --> 00:00:59,307 She talked about a stuntman on a movie called Project Ronkonkoma. 23 00:00:59,308 --> 00:01:01,225 She said, "He's gonna be the death of me." 24 00:01:01,226 --> 00:01:03,102 What's Project Ronkonkoma? 25 00:01:03,103 --> 00:01:05,104 Here we go! Project Ronkonkoma. 26 00:01:05,105 --> 00:01:07,356 Who's the stunt person? Is it someone we can talk to? 27 00:01:07,357 --> 00:01:09,652 Not exactly. 28 00:01:16,367 --> 00:01:20,538 For those of us in film and TV, the people you work with are everything. 29 00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,331 Until it's time to move on to the next show, 30 00:01:23,332 --> 00:01:25,668 and then it's easy to lose touch. 31 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,461 Talk to Pataki. 32 00:01:28,462 --> 00:01:30,797 Hey hey, Spanko! How's it goin', man? 33 00:01:30,798 --> 00:01:32,801 No, no, you're good. I'm just leavin' set. 34 00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:37,263 Project Ronkonkoma! Of course I can wrestle up a team! 35 00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,305 But sometimes, you meet a person 36 00:01:39,306 --> 00:01:41,516 you don't want to let go of. 37 00:01:41,517 --> 00:01:44,102 And sometimes, they can change your life 38 00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:46,270 in ways you never saw coming. 39 00:01:46,271 --> 00:01:47,356 Ha, ha! 40 00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:52,944 Geez! 41 00:01:52,945 --> 00:01:56,114 That was some flip! 42 00:01:56,115 --> 00:01:58,491 I teach that in my Advanced Somersault Intensive, 43 00:01:58,492 --> 00:01:59,868 which is in the winter. 44 00:02:01,663 --> 00:02:03,747 You ever stunted before? 45 00:02:07,043 --> 00:02:08,084 There he is. 46 00:02:08,085 --> 00:02:09,836 Excuse me, you can't go in there. 47 00:02:09,837 --> 00:02:12,380 Oh, uh, we have to. Uh, we're his family. 48 00:02:12,381 --> 00:02:14,674 Uh, that's right. We're the Stubbins, you know. 49 00:02:14,675 --> 00:02:18,719 I'm Oliver. Th-This cailín is Mabel, and of course, you've met cousin Charles. 50 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:20,680 And it sure is good to know ya! 51 00:02:20,681 --> 00:02:22,140 Well, the accent's new. 52 00:02:22,141 --> 00:02:23,558 Well, it's in and out. 53 00:02:23,559 --> 00:02:26,102 Okay, fine, we're here investigating a murder, 54 00:02:26,103 --> 00:02:27,687 and we need to see Glen. 55 00:02:27,688 --> 00:02:30,106 Glen is in a fragile state. 56 00:02:30,107 --> 00:02:32,400 He can't be subjected to an interrogation right now. 57 00:02:32,401 --> 00:02:36,112 No need to worry, darlin'. These are mild questions. 58 00:02:36,113 --> 00:02:39,991 Like, uh, "We heard Sazz was beefin' with her protégé. 59 00:02:39,992 --> 00:02:42,451 Might that be you, Glen Stubbins?" 60 00:02:42,452 --> 00:02:46,372 And sure, whatever happened on Project Ronkonkoma 61 00:02:46,373 --> 00:02:48,166 on the Erin's green isle? 62 00:02:48,167 --> 00:02:49,917 Um, and you know, 63 00:02:49,918 --> 00:02:52,463 "Did you murder our friend?" 64 00:02:53,214 --> 00:02:55,715 You're not goin' in. That's final. 65 00:02:55,716 --> 00:02:56,924 Also, what's with the beer? 66 00:02:56,925 --> 00:02:59,844 - Oh, uh, we were going to... - No, please. 67 00:02:59,845 --> 00:03:01,681 ...l-lure him out of his coma. 68 00:03:02,640 --> 00:03:05,892 Ya thought the smell of beer would rouse him? 69 00:03:05,893 --> 00:03:08,394 Why? 'Cause he's Irish? 70 00:03:08,395 --> 00:03:10,104 Did ya bring some corned beef, too? 71 00:03:10,105 --> 00:03:12,231 No... 72 00:03:12,232 --> 00:03:14,442 We also brought smellin' salts. 73 00:03:14,443 --> 00:03:16,946 Good luck accusin' that of being in bad taste. 74 00:03:17,488 --> 00:03:19,239 I don't even know if they work. 75 00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:22,742 They work. They work. 76 00:03:22,743 --> 00:03:24,285 We also brought a witchy board 77 00:03:24,286 --> 00:03:27,373 on the off-chance he could control it with his mind. 78 00:03:28,750 --> 00:03:29,959 So? 79 00:03:31,669 --> 00:03:35,046 Well, the nurse said that she'd call if Glen wakes up. 80 00:03:35,047 --> 00:03:37,006 - Oh. - So, what do we do now? 81 00:03:37,007 --> 00:03:39,300 What do I do with all this beer? 82 00:03:39,301 --> 00:03:41,135 Sazz gave them to me the night she died, 83 00:03:41,136 --> 00:03:43,304 but I'm never gonna drink them 'cause, as you know, 84 00:03:43,305 --> 00:03:44,972 beer is a peasant's drink. 85 00:03:44,973 --> 00:03:47,225 Oliver, I'll take your peasant's beer 86 00:03:47,226 --> 00:03:49,020 because I'm such a good friend. 87 00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:51,229 You know, I've been thinking. 88 00:03:51,230 --> 00:03:54,398 You're getting married in a few days, and what if I took you out 89 00:03:54,399 --> 00:03:57,570 and bought you a non-beer drink to, uh, celebrate? 90 00:03:58,738 --> 00:04:01,364 Charles, are you offering to throw me a bachelor party? 91 00:04:01,365 --> 00:04:03,324 I don't care what people say. 92 00:04:03,325 --> 00:04:05,411 You're not an ice prince. 93 00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:07,997 Good people. 94 00:04:08,706 --> 00:04:11,165 Guys, it's the bartender from Concussions. 95 00:04:11,166 --> 00:04:12,541 Ah! 96 00:04:12,542 --> 00:04:16,379 The three jackasses who promised to solve Sazz's murder. 97 00:04:16,380 --> 00:04:17,672 We're still doing that. 98 00:04:17,673 --> 00:04:20,049 Hm, racked up a coma along the way. 99 00:04:20,050 --> 00:04:22,510 Hey, uh, you're in the stunt world. 100 00:04:22,511 --> 00:04:24,971 We heard Sazz's protégé on Project Ronkonkoma 101 00:04:24,972 --> 00:04:27,056 was giving her a hard time, 102 00:04:27,057 --> 00:04:29,392 and Glen Stubbins ended up with credit on the movie. 103 00:04:29,393 --> 00:04:30,810 No. 104 00:04:30,811 --> 00:04:33,813 Glen was brought in to replace Sazz's protégé. 105 00:04:33,814 --> 00:04:37,402 The guy fucked up so bad, Sazz had to blackball him. 106 00:04:38,069 --> 00:04:41,696 So, Sazz ended her protégé's career, 107 00:04:41,697 --> 00:04:43,614 and then Glen replaced him. 108 00:04:43,615 --> 00:04:46,202 That's motive to kill both of 'em. 109 00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:50,621 So, Glen was never our shooter. He was another victim. 110 00:04:50,622 --> 00:04:52,248 Who was this protégé? 111 00:04:52,249 --> 00:04:55,626 - And what happened on Project Ronkonkoma? - I didn't know the guy. 112 00:04:55,627 --> 00:05:00,883 The only ones who know what went down are Sazz, Glen, and the director. 113 00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:04,385 So, all we have to do is track down the director of that movie, 114 00:05:04,386 --> 00:05:05,928 who was... 115 00:05:05,929 --> 00:05:07,014 Ron Howard. 116 00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:11,936 Finally, a celebrity this season! 117 00:06:05,573 --> 00:06:08,574 {\an8}Oh! Your first professional fire stunt. 118 00:06:08,575 --> 00:06:10,451 {\an8}Oh! Alright. 119 00:06:10,452 --> 00:06:13,037 {\an8}Now I know we've been over this a million times. 120 00:06:13,038 --> 00:06:15,664 {\an8}We're gonna make it a million and one. Ready? 121 00:06:15,665 --> 00:06:17,124 - Mm-hmm. - Step one, 122 00:06:17,125 --> 00:06:20,878 {\an8}grab your fireproof jock from the deep freeze. Strap it on. 123 00:06:20,879 --> 00:06:25,132 {\an8}Step two, slather up your tender bits with this stuff. 124 00:06:25,133 --> 00:06:27,009 Wrists, neck, ankles. 125 00:06:27,010 --> 00:06:29,804 {\an8}Anything not covered by... 126 00:06:29,805 --> 00:06:32,014 {\an8}this flame-retardant vest, 127 00:06:32,015 --> 00:06:34,183 {\an8}AKA step three. 128 00:06:34,184 --> 00:06:36,644 {\an8}Yeah, it's a bit tattered, it's a bit old school, 129 00:06:36,645 --> 00:06:40,189 {\an8}but it's a gift from my old man, and it's kept me safe all these years. 130 00:06:40,190 --> 00:06:42,650 {\an8}Here, for you. Try it on. 131 00:06:42,651 --> 00:06:44,443 {\an8}Lather yourself up, 132 00:06:44,444 --> 00:06:46,529 {\an8}and we're gonna torch you. 133 00:06:46,530 --> 00:06:48,447 {\an8}Ooh! I'm so psyched for you. 134 00:06:48,448 --> 00:06:50,617 {\an8}Frank! You good? 135 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:57,373 Well, took us long enough, but we finally are on the right track. 136 00:06:57,374 --> 00:07:01,087 {\an8}Only question is how the hell do we get to Ron Howard? 137 00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:06,300 Well, I've been waiting to tell you this for maximum impact, but... 138 00:07:07,301 --> 00:07:10,845 Ron-Ron and I are close personal friends. 139 00:07:10,846 --> 00:07:13,099 And you know it's true because he called him Ron-Ron. 140 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:16,642 I'll have you know our headshots are hung right next to each other 141 00:07:16,643 --> 00:07:18,436 at my favorite Chinese restaurant. 142 00:07:18,437 --> 00:07:21,397 Well, next to each other in an across-and-down sort of way. 143 00:07:21,398 --> 00:07:23,732 My face is covered by a plant, 144 00:07:23,733 --> 00:07:26,277 but my pompadour is pompin'. 145 00:07:26,278 --> 00:07:29,488 Great. Your pictures know each other. That's incredibly helpful. 146 00:07:29,489 --> 00:07:32,241 Devastating that you know me so well 147 00:07:32,242 --> 00:07:35,661 and yet you could think that was the end of my story. 148 00:07:35,662 --> 00:07:37,872 The year! 149 00:07:37,873 --> 00:07:40,332 1988. 150 00:07:40,333 --> 00:07:42,376 I was 10 dumplings deep, 151 00:07:42,377 --> 00:07:46,006 but who should enter? Hollywood's own, Ron Howard. 152 00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:50,259 Next thing you know, we're sharing an off-menu soup 153 00:07:50,260 --> 00:07:53,890 that is so spicy, we sweat through our shirts. 154 00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:55,892 We talked into the wee hours, 155 00:07:56,517 --> 00:07:58,601 topless, and, I don't know, 156 00:07:58,602 --> 00:08:00,519 maybe we danced on top of the table. 157 00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:03,272 I'm not sure. The end of the evening is a bit fuzzy. 158 00:08:03,273 --> 00:08:06,317 Not unlike Ron-Ron's chest, which I do remember. 159 00:08:06,318 --> 00:08:08,235 You saw Ron Howard's nipples? 160 00:08:08,236 --> 00:08:11,155 - Oh, my God! - Like two little cardinals in a bush. 161 00:08:11,156 --> 00:08:13,699 Okay, let's just say that story is true. 162 00:08:13,700 --> 00:08:17,328 Why don't you give, uh, your good friend a call and get us some info? 163 00:08:17,329 --> 00:08:19,538 Well, this was before cell phones, Mabel. 164 00:08:19,539 --> 00:08:20,831 - Mm. - I only have the number 165 00:08:20,832 --> 00:08:22,291 to his car fax machine, 166 00:08:22,292 --> 00:08:24,376 but if we stake out the restaurant, we'll find him. 167 00:08:24,377 --> 00:08:27,129 You know what? I'm just gonna call 168 00:08:27,130 --> 00:08:29,715 Tommy Hanks and just get his number. 169 00:08:29,716 --> 00:08:32,176 I mean, he's one of my close personal friends, you know, 170 00:08:32,177 --> 00:08:34,513 because, one time, I watched The Polar Express. 171 00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:38,307 That is fu-- Although, 172 00:08:38,308 --> 00:08:40,309 speaking of Tom Hanks, we should invite him. 173 00:08:40,310 --> 00:08:41,560 Invite him to what? 174 00:08:41,561 --> 00:08:43,020 My bachelor party. 175 00:08:43,021 --> 00:08:46,273 I've literally spent the entire time with you since the hospital. 176 00:08:46,274 --> 00:08:48,526 - When would I have ever done that? - I-I'm sorry. Yes, okay. 177 00:08:48,527 --> 00:08:51,529 B-But, the invites should go out soon, Charles. 178 00:08:51,530 --> 00:08:54,114 Yeah, Charles. I mean, you have, like, 50 hours, 179 00:08:54,115 --> 00:08:56,825 which means you're looking at Evites. 180 00:08:56,826 --> 00:08:59,828 Evites. Yeah, that's not the classiest, 181 00:08:59,829 --> 00:09:02,122 but that is the hand we have been dealt. 182 00:09:02,123 --> 00:09:04,708 Alright, I'll keep it simple. I just want three little things 183 00:09:04,709 --> 00:09:06,418 for my bachelor party. 184 00:09:06,419 --> 00:09:07,962 Whiskey, 185 00:09:07,963 --> 00:09:09,922 A-list celebrities, 186 00:09:09,923 --> 00:09:12,633 and someone who does something naughty, 187 00:09:12,634 --> 00:09:15,511 and we all have to keep it a secret for the rest of our lives. 188 00:09:15,512 --> 00:09:17,763 I'll give you an acronym to help you remember. 189 00:09:17,764 --> 00:09:20,559 W-A-N-S, WANS. 190 00:09:21,769 --> 00:09:25,020 Whiskey, A-list celebrities, naughty secret. 191 00:09:25,021 --> 00:09:26,313 Got it. 192 00:09:26,314 --> 00:09:28,941 H-E-L-P. 193 00:09:28,942 --> 00:09:31,610 This seems like a really good time for me to exit. 194 00:09:31,611 --> 00:09:34,113 So, I am gonna go visit someone 195 00:09:34,114 --> 00:09:36,241 who can actually help us find Ron Howard. 196 00:09:41,956 --> 00:09:44,456 Come in. 197 00:09:44,457 --> 00:09:46,417 - Mabel! - Hey. 198 00:09:46,418 --> 00:09:48,127 You look so pretty! 199 00:09:48,128 --> 00:09:50,296 Wait, did we have something on the books for today? 200 00:09:50,297 --> 00:09:51,880 Hold. 201 00:09:51,881 --> 00:09:53,048 - Skylar? - [on phone] Hi. 202 00:09:53,049 --> 00:09:55,634 Hi, did we have something on the books with Mabel today? 203 00:09:55,635 --> 00:09:57,344 Maybe. I-I don't remember. 204 00:09:57,345 --> 00:09:59,138 I-It's fine if you forgot. 205 00:09:59,139 --> 00:10:00,556 I keep forgetting! 206 00:10:00,557 --> 00:10:02,183 You're in a safe space, don't worry. 207 00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:06,689 No, please don't take another mental health day. Please, no. 208 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,773 Okay, good. Bye. 209 00:10:09,774 --> 00:10:11,859 Can't take it anymore. 210 00:10:11,860 --> 00:10:15,279 Uh... [nervous laugh] Sorry, there was nothing on the books today. 211 00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:19,033 I, um, I just-- I wanted to ask you about-- 212 00:10:19,034 --> 00:10:20,369 About the movie? 213 00:10:21,871 --> 00:10:24,163 Ugh, let me tell you. The movie is addicted 214 00:10:24,164 --> 00:10:26,457 to being a piece of shit. 215 00:10:26,458 --> 00:10:28,751 I hate the costumes. They're awful. 216 00:10:28,752 --> 00:10:32,004 Eva Longoria is constantly unavailable 217 00:10:32,005 --> 00:10:35,883 because of some TED Talk or billionaire's birthday. 218 00:10:35,884 --> 00:10:39,805 The Brothers Sisters are draining every last drop of me. 219 00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:44,516 But, they do keep asking for more Mabel scenes, 220 00:10:44,517 --> 00:10:46,560 which is interesting. Something about your... 221 00:10:46,561 --> 00:10:48,854 "erotic non-sexuality." 222 00:10:48,855 --> 00:10:50,898 Yeah, it's the sweaters. 223 00:10:50,899 --> 00:10:53,692 And every draft that Marshall turns in is worse than the last. 224 00:10:53,693 --> 00:10:56,779 It's like I can't even remember the script that I fell in love with. 225 00:10:56,780 --> 00:11:00,074 And I don't know if it's the two coffee enemas that I took this morning, 226 00:11:00,075 --> 00:11:02,701 but I'm starting to think that the Brothers Sisters 227 00:11:02,702 --> 00:11:05,455 aren't actually identical. 228 00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:22,846 Well, uh, I just-- I came by 229 00:11:22,847 --> 00:11:26,058 because I'm trying to track down Ron Howard. 230 00:11:26,059 --> 00:11:28,394 Uh, do you, by chance, know where he is? 231 00:11:28,395 --> 00:11:30,270 Of course, I know where that fucker is. 232 00:11:30,271 --> 00:11:31,939 - Wait, you do? - Oh yes, Mabel. 233 00:11:31,940 --> 00:11:34,066 You're nobody in this town if you ain't keeping track of... 234 00:11:34,067 --> 00:11:36,237 Ron Howard. 235 00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:39,281 He's actually in New York right now shooting a movie. 236 00:11:40,449 --> 00:11:42,366 No one knows what it's about or who's in it, 237 00:11:42,367 --> 00:11:45,119 but I did hear that it's very autobiographical 238 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:47,830 and very personal and very small, 239 00:11:47,831 --> 00:11:50,376 and the budget is $200 million. 240 00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:54,128 Uh-- 241 00:11:54,129 --> 00:11:56,048 Can I ask you a question? 242 00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:59,842 When you talk, do you say "bro"? 243 00:11:59,843 --> 00:12:02,970 Bro? No, I hang out with 70-year-olds. 244 00:12:02,971 --> 00:12:05,057 Right. That's what I thought. 245 00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:09,395 These pages are a big fat suck-fest. 246 00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:11,520 You know what? I have an idea. 247 00:12:11,521 --> 00:12:14,440 What if I give you Ron Howard's address, 248 00:12:14,441 --> 00:12:16,942 and you do something for me, 249 00:12:16,943 --> 00:12:19,695 and that would be taking a pass on these scenes, 250 00:12:19,696 --> 00:12:23,075 but you have to make sure it sounds like the real Mabel. What do you think? 251 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,994 If, uh, if this lead pans out, 252 00:12:26,995 --> 00:12:29,580 maybe, uh, I can help you when I come back. 253 00:12:29,581 --> 00:12:32,207 Yes! Here you go. 254 00:12:32,208 --> 00:12:33,544 Thank you. 255 00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:35,754 - Uh, goodbye. - Bye. 256 00:12:37,673 --> 00:12:40,424 Everyone, we need all Escape From Planet Klongo NDAs 257 00:12:40,425 --> 00:12:41,842 signed before entering. 258 00:12:41,843 --> 00:12:42,926 Oh. 259 00:12:42,927 --> 00:12:44,928 Okay, okay, let me take the lead. 260 00:12:44,929 --> 00:12:46,388 If I drop my name, 261 00:12:46,389 --> 00:12:49,558 Ron Howard will swing that velvet rope wide open. 262 00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:51,935 I think I should. Security guards love Brazzos. 263 00:12:51,936 --> 00:12:53,854 I'm kinda their Princess Diana. 264 00:12:53,855 --> 00:12:56,774 I think I should, mostly because I'm neither of you. 265 00:12:56,775 --> 00:12:58,859 Hold up. You got badges? 266 00:12:58,860 --> 00:13:01,113 Oh yeah, I got a badge. Huh? 267 00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:05,326 From Brazzos? TV show? Your dad probably watched? 268 00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:08,076 - Emmy nomination for sound? - Um, 269 00:13:08,077 --> 00:13:09,870 sorry, we just, we need to talk 270 00:13:09,871 --> 00:13:12,372 to Mr. Howard about an investigation. 271 00:13:12,373 --> 00:13:14,166 We're professional podcasters. 272 00:13:14,167 --> 00:13:15,626 Only Murders in the Building. 273 00:13:15,627 --> 00:13:17,753 We're the most listened to murder podcast 274 00:13:17,754 --> 00:13:20,214 on the Upper West Side that's sponsored by a deli chain. 275 00:13:20,215 --> 00:13:22,257 Yeah, you're not gettin' in here. 276 00:13:22,258 --> 00:13:26,053 W-Well, i-if you could just tell Ron-Ron that Ollie Putnam is here. 277 00:13:26,054 --> 00:13:29,098 No, no. Tell him "off-menu soup." 278 00:13:31,852 --> 00:13:34,771 Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot! 279 00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:38,357 Ah! Ah! Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot! 280 00:13:38,358 --> 00:13:41,111 - He'll know who that means. - Look. 281 00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:44,446 I'ma be real with you. I don't really watch TV, 282 00:13:44,447 --> 00:13:46,114 and congrats on the podcast. 283 00:13:46,115 --> 00:13:48,116 I mean, that's, that's huge, and it's so amazing 284 00:13:48,117 --> 00:13:50,536 that you have an inside joke with Ron Howard, 285 00:13:50,537 --> 00:13:52,371 but if I let you in, 286 00:13:52,372 --> 00:13:54,498 then I'll lose my job, and then I won't have enough money 287 00:13:54,499 --> 00:13:56,083 to go to Disneyland with my cousins, 288 00:13:56,084 --> 00:13:58,585 and we've been planning this trip for years. 289 00:13:58,586 --> 00:14:00,462 So, just in case my boss is listening, 290 00:14:00,463 --> 00:14:01,964 get outta here! 291 00:14:01,965 --> 00:14:03,551 Okay. 292 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:07,302 Ugh, that was a very charming rejection. 293 00:14:07,303 --> 00:14:09,263 Background actors? 294 00:14:09,264 --> 00:14:11,056 Yes? 295 00:14:11,057 --> 00:14:13,018 You were supposed to arrive 10 minutes ago. Move it! 296 00:14:13,644 --> 00:14:15,229 Oh! [scoffs, mumbles] Time. 297 00:14:16,063 --> 00:14:17,106 Background. 298 00:14:17,648 --> 00:14:18,772 Have fun with your cousins. 299 00:14:18,773 --> 00:14:20,776 - Get your badge. - Yes. 300 00:14:21,318 --> 00:14:22,820 Thank you. 301 00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:28,657 I'm not gonna have to do any acting, right? 302 00:14:28,658 --> 00:14:31,785 Are you nervous? You know your hobby is chasing murderers? 303 00:14:31,786 --> 00:14:33,163 Oh yeah, that's somehow less scary. 304 00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:36,957 Well, good news. As soon as we step on set, 305 00:14:36,958 --> 00:14:39,877 Ron-Ron will recognize me, and we'll get pulled away. 306 00:14:39,878 --> 00:14:42,170 And don't worry. Background actors don't really have to do much. 307 00:14:42,171 --> 00:14:44,172 You just be natural. 308 00:14:44,173 --> 00:14:45,716 You know, I hadn't thought of it before, 309 00:14:45,717 --> 00:14:49,388 but I guess it's time for me to change my emergency contact to Loretta. 310 00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:51,555 A whole new life. 311 00:14:51,556 --> 00:14:54,016 - Gives me chills. - Okay, listen up! 312 00:14:54,017 --> 00:14:57,853 I need everyone to line up and deliver your best terrified reaction. 313 00:14:57,854 --> 00:14:59,479 Best 10 stay, the rest go home. 314 00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:01,609 You said background actors don't have to do much. 315 00:15:02,276 --> 00:15:04,526 Well, honey, they do now, so buckle up. 316 00:15:04,527 --> 00:15:07,281 Okay, let's go, guys. Alright, line up over here. 317 00:15:09,116 --> 00:15:11,241 I don't know whether to go big, do I go small, 318 00:15:11,242 --> 00:15:14,203 or communicate the unspeakable horror using only my teeth? 319 00:15:15,664 --> 00:15:17,249 - Not that. - You first. 320 00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:22,171 - You're in. - Oh. 321 00:15:22,963 --> 00:15:25,507 - What do I do? - I think big. I think we go big. 322 00:15:26,133 --> 00:15:27,259 I was hoping for big. 323 00:15:30,304 --> 00:15:31,887 - You're out. - Damn. 324 00:15:31,888 --> 00:15:33,722 Final answer, small. We're going small. 325 00:15:33,723 --> 00:15:36,101 Small is sophisticated. Small is for the silver screen. 326 00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:39,021 - Really keeping us on our toes here. - You. 327 00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:47,945 - Thought we said small. - That was my small. 328 00:15:47,946 --> 00:15:50,240 - You're in. - Oh, thank you. 329 00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:54,576 Oh, my God, Brazzos? 330 00:15:54,577 --> 00:15:56,870 Ah. So nice to meet a fan. 331 00:15:56,871 --> 00:15:58,413 I'm sure Ron'll want to say hello. 332 00:15:58,414 --> 00:15:59,750 You're doing background now? 333 00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:03,251 That's so sad. You can be in the movie. 334 00:16:03,252 --> 00:16:04,962 You're still in the game. You're in. 335 00:16:04,963 --> 00:16:08,048 - This way. - No! I don't think I can do this. 336 00:16:08,049 --> 00:16:09,134 You. 337 00:16:12,388 --> 00:16:13,595 Wow, great. You're in. 338 00:16:13,596 --> 00:16:15,099 Head on over to wardrobe and makeup. 339 00:16:32,282 --> 00:16:33,283 Are... 340 00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:35,577 Are ye an angel? 341 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:38,412 Oh. Relax. 342 00:16:38,413 --> 00:16:40,330 You're in the hospital. 343 00:16:40,331 --> 00:16:42,960 - You've been shot in the head. - Nay. 344 00:16:43,919 --> 00:16:45,963 The heart. 345 00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:48,964 Ya had some friends come here earlier, 346 00:16:48,965 --> 00:16:51,258 a couple o' married old men and their caretaker. 347 00:16:51,259 --> 00:16:56,265 They wanted to ask you about the stunt guy on Project Ronkonkoma? 348 00:16:56,890 --> 00:17:00,017 Yes. Right. No, I-I need to talk to 'em right away. 349 00:17:00,018 --> 00:17:02,019 - I'll let them know you're up. - Right away. 350 00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:04,106 Oh, also, um... 351 00:17:05,607 --> 00:17:08,567 would ya do me the honor of bein' 352 00:17:08,568 --> 00:17:10,654 Mrs. Glen Stubbins? 353 00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:14,491 Also, I'm Glen Stubbins. 354 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:18,243 Oh. Yeah, I'll get your doctor. 355 00:17:18,244 --> 00:17:19,328 - Okay. - Yeah. 356 00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:25,710 Can I-I get a room without the rats? 357 00:17:33,010 --> 00:17:34,009 Alright. 358 00:17:34,010 --> 00:17:36,970 Don't forget to take a deep breath before they light you up. 359 00:17:36,971 --> 00:17:39,723 Last thing you wanna do is inhale flames into your lungs. 360 00:17:39,724 --> 00:17:42,642 And when the director yells "cut," you stop, drop, 361 00:17:42,643 --> 00:17:45,896 and let 'em hose you down. And then, you take a good 30 seconds 362 00:17:45,897 --> 00:17:49,232 before you do anything else in case you re-spark. 363 00:17:49,233 --> 00:17:50,692 You ready? 364 00:17:50,693 --> 00:17:52,652 Yeah, of course, you are. 365 00:17:52,653 --> 00:17:54,531 Now, go make my papa proud. 366 00:17:57,409 --> 00:18:00,412 Doing this for Sazz, doing this for Sazz. 367 00:18:02,539 --> 00:18:05,874 How is Ron-Ron going to recognize me now? 368 00:18:05,875 --> 00:18:09,002 That night in the Chinese restaurant, my aesthetic was distinctively not 369 00:18:09,003 --> 00:18:10,921 life-size Sour Patch Kid. 370 00:18:10,922 --> 00:18:14,216 And why do we have to wear spandex, and Mabel only gets makeup? 371 00:18:14,217 --> 00:18:16,093 Well, because you guys are a bunch of... 372 00:18:16,094 --> 00:18:18,595 "Klongos," and I'm just a girl. 373 00:18:18,596 --> 00:18:21,723 Right, Klongos. I mean, I'm sorry, but what is this movie? 374 00:18:21,724 --> 00:18:24,101 Are we witnessing the end of Ron Howard's career? 375 00:18:24,102 --> 00:18:26,436 No, no, no. What I learned about Ron over soup 376 00:18:26,437 --> 00:18:29,731 is you've gotta just trust him. I told him, I said, 377 00:18:29,732 --> 00:18:32,192 "Ron-Ron, you're the beautiful mind." 378 00:18:32,193 --> 00:18:34,569 And he loved that, and he just plunked down the credit card 379 00:18:34,570 --> 00:18:36,154 and paid for the whole soup. 380 00:18:36,155 --> 00:18:37,656 Oh, my God, guys. 381 00:18:37,657 --> 00:18:39,658 I have to get out of here and get to the hospital. 382 00:18:39,659 --> 00:18:41,036 Glen Stubbins is awake. 383 00:18:41,537 --> 00:18:43,036 Also, I'm gonna see if they can remove 384 00:18:43,037 --> 00:18:47,000 the part of my brain that stores the image of you in spandex. 385 00:18:48,752 --> 00:18:50,129 Well... 386 00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:52,170 Oh, yeah... 387 00:18:52,171 --> 00:18:55,090 Oh, by the way, I've been thinking about your bachelor party, 388 00:18:55,091 --> 00:18:56,424 and I think I got a winner. 389 00:18:56,425 --> 00:18:58,760 Finally. Yes, let's hear it. 390 00:18:58,761 --> 00:19:01,429 I hope the spandex and the balls inspired you. 391 00:19:01,430 --> 00:19:03,682 Okay, remember that hot dog restaurant we went to? 392 00:19:03,683 --> 00:19:05,892 - Yeah. - And, uh, there was a phone booth outside, 393 00:19:05,893 --> 00:19:09,354 but it wasn't really a phone booth, it was a door to a speakeasy? 394 00:19:09,355 --> 00:19:11,398 I was thinking we could do something like that. 395 00:19:11,399 --> 00:19:13,235 Get some dogs with my dawg! 396 00:19:14,862 --> 00:19:16,738 I feel like I've taken crazy pills. 397 00:19:17,114 --> 00:19:19,489 Do we remember W-A-N-S?! 398 00:19:19,490 --> 00:19:21,324 Whiskey, A-listers, 399 00:19:21,325 --> 00:19:23,910 - naughty secret? Oh, you do remember? - Naughty secret. Yeah. 400 00:19:23,911 --> 00:19:27,583 'Cause I thought your plan lacked my simple parameters due to forgetfulness. 401 00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:31,211 But instead, the culprit is willful negligence! 402 00:19:31,879 --> 00:19:33,920 Alright. Just forget it! 403 00:19:33,921 --> 00:19:35,964 - And you're not wearing this either! - Ah! 404 00:19:35,965 --> 00:19:38,801 Background, you're up on set. 405 00:19:43,015 --> 00:19:45,058 Ah, you're back, sweetheart. 406 00:19:47,811 --> 00:19:49,644 What? It's you? 407 00:19:49,645 --> 00:19:51,855 What are... 408 00:19:51,856 --> 00:19:54,149 What you-- No. 409 00:19:54,150 --> 00:19:57,777 No, no. No, don't! No! 410 00:19:57,778 --> 00:20:00,866 Don't! Stop, no! 411 00:20:03,660 --> 00:20:05,493 Alright, everybody in? 412 00:20:05,494 --> 00:20:06,661 Let's go! 413 00:20:06,662 --> 00:20:09,291 Places! 414 00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:14,127 Ron-Ron? Are you there? 415 00:20:14,128 --> 00:20:15,421 It's me! 416 00:20:18,258 --> 00:20:20,008 Hey, you're not talking to Ron. 417 00:20:20,009 --> 00:20:22,344 Listen up, everybody. On my cue, 418 00:20:22,345 --> 00:20:23,970 you're gonna look up at the monster, 419 00:20:23,971 --> 00:20:26,097 you're gonna look scared, 420 00:20:26,098 --> 00:20:28,225 and you're gonna run off that way. Yeah? 421 00:20:28,226 --> 00:20:29,561 Great. 422 00:20:30,145 --> 00:20:32,689 I know our bold acting choice. Follow my lead. 423 00:20:33,899 --> 00:20:35,815 Background! 424 00:20:35,816 --> 00:20:37,109 And... action! 425 00:20:38,403 --> 00:20:41,446 Run! Run, fellow Klongos! 426 00:20:41,447 --> 00:20:44,366 I shall buy you time! 427 00:20:44,367 --> 00:20:46,495 Don't let my death be in vain! 428 00:20:46,745 --> 00:20:49,537 - Monster, no! - What the hell's with him? 429 00:20:49,538 --> 00:20:52,165 No-- Charles, a little effort, please! 430 00:20:52,166 --> 00:20:54,753 Or is this gonna be my bachelor party all over again? 431 00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:56,962 Oh? 432 00:20:56,963 --> 00:21:00,300 Your bachelor party? Oh, you're right, yes. I should pitch in. 433 00:21:00,801 --> 00:21:01,883 How about a... 434 00:21:01,884 --> 00:21:04,844 a sunset cigar cruise up the Gowanus Canal? 435 00:21:04,845 --> 00:21:07,973 Or maybe a dining and spa experience, 436 00:21:07,974 --> 00:21:10,600 where we get fish pedicures, and afterwards, 437 00:21:10,601 --> 00:21:13,812 we eat the fish omakase-style?! Oh, wait! 438 00:21:13,813 --> 00:21:17,524 Ice luges poured by professional ice lugers. 439 00:21:17,525 --> 00:21:19,901 Is this getting good enough for you? 440 00:21:19,902 --> 00:21:23,571 Oh wait. Oh, maybe, a members-only aerialist strip club! 441 00:21:23,572 --> 00:21:26,324 And an elephant! But, not just any elephant! 442 00:21:26,325 --> 00:21:28,159 An A-list elephant. 443 00:21:28,160 --> 00:21:30,870 Babar, Dumbo, or maybe the viral one 444 00:21:30,871 --> 00:21:34,457 who sat on the zookeeper's head. Because it really doesn't matter 445 00:21:34,458 --> 00:21:37,919 because no one is gonna show up! 446 00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:40,090 Because you! 447 00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,801 Are insufferable. 448 00:21:43,510 --> 00:21:45,427 And... cut? 449 00:21:45,428 --> 00:21:47,012 Who hired the idiots? 450 00:21:47,013 --> 00:21:48,888 Get 'em out and get a picture for my ban list. 451 00:21:48,889 --> 00:21:51,059 The director has asked that you go home. 452 00:21:51,935 --> 00:21:52,978 Now. 453 00:21:54,021 --> 00:21:55,063 Sorry, Brazzos. 454 00:21:59,443 --> 00:22:02,319 Now, if you'd line up, Ron Howard would like to say hi 455 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:05,323 and thank each of you for your work today before we start rolling. 456 00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:13,540 Where is he? 457 00:22:14,958 --> 00:22:17,000 I'm so sorry. 458 00:22:17,001 --> 00:22:19,878 - He's dead. My Glen. - W-- 459 00:22:19,879 --> 00:22:21,921 - What happened? - I don't know! 460 00:22:21,922 --> 00:22:24,299 He seemed fine. He was making me laugh. 461 00:22:24,300 --> 00:22:27,635 I called his people to let them know he was awake, did my rounds, 462 00:22:27,636 --> 00:22:29,804 and when I returned, he... 463 00:22:29,805 --> 00:22:32,223 [on TV] Breaking news. Nicky "The Neck" Caccimelio, 464 00:22:32,224 --> 00:22:34,934 the Dry Cleaning King of Brooklyn, has been reported missing. 465 00:22:34,935 --> 00:22:37,270 Though he has ties to the Caputo crime family, 466 00:22:37,271 --> 00:22:40,523 officials say they do not suspect foul play at this time. 467 00:22:40,524 --> 00:22:44,194 Uh, who else did you call and tell that Glen was awake? 468 00:22:44,195 --> 00:22:47,155 Just you and his emergency contact. 469 00:22:47,156 --> 00:22:50,575 - Sazz Pataki. - You called Sazz? 470 00:22:50,576 --> 00:22:52,536 Did a man answer? 471 00:22:54,790 --> 00:22:56,792 - Did I do somethin' wrong? - Uh... 472 00:23:03,256 --> 00:23:05,217 {\an8}- Rolling. - And action! 473 00:23:14,726 --> 00:23:16,268 Get out here, you rat! 474 00:23:19,606 --> 00:23:21,065 On the ground! 475 00:23:27,197 --> 00:23:29,031 This is for Don Antonio. 476 00:23:33,578 --> 00:23:34,870 Good, good. 477 00:23:42,337 --> 00:23:44,295 Okay, cut! Fire out! 478 00:23:44,296 --> 00:23:46,589 Yes! Yes! Yes! 479 00:23:46,590 --> 00:23:47,924 Clear! 480 00:23:47,925 --> 00:23:49,175 Told you. Yes, yes, yes, yes! 481 00:23:49,176 --> 00:23:51,679 I told you. I told you we'd do it in one! 482 00:23:54,766 --> 00:23:58,184 Geez whiz! 483 00:23:58,185 --> 00:24:02,064 Oh! Oh no! 484 00:24:05,861 --> 00:24:07,737 Go ahead and strike that! 485 00:24:11,616 --> 00:24:13,241 - You need a hand? - No, no. 486 00:24:13,242 --> 00:24:15,660 - I don't need your help. - 'Cause I can if... 487 00:24:15,661 --> 00:24:18,163 Oh no, no, I've already asked too much. 488 00:24:18,164 --> 00:24:20,750 I don't wanna be "insufferable." 489 00:24:33,263 --> 00:24:35,390 You're my emergency contact. 490 00:24:37,434 --> 00:24:38,433 What? 491 00:24:38,434 --> 00:24:41,060 Well, when I fill out forms, I put your name. 492 00:24:41,061 --> 00:24:44,481 And I know you used to put mine, but now it's Loretta's. 493 00:24:44,482 --> 00:24:46,232 You know, 494 00:24:46,233 --> 00:24:49,946 I always knew Mabel would one day spread her wings and leave, but... 495 00:24:51,114 --> 00:24:54,451 you and me, I thought we'd, you know, grow old... er, 496 00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:58,538 and die together. Uh... 497 00:24:59,498 --> 00:25:00,872 And don't get me wrong, 498 00:25:00,873 --> 00:25:03,416 I like Loretta. I really like Loretta. 499 00:25:03,417 --> 00:25:06,296 But now, I'm kinda the awkward guy, 500 00:25:07,172 --> 00:25:09,756 third-wheeling it on your dates. 501 00:25:09,757 --> 00:25:13,470 You know, saying, "Hey, let's split a dessert three ways." 502 00:25:14,221 --> 00:25:15,263 You know, 503 00:25:16,473 --> 00:25:19,893 I never wanted, really, to throw you a bachelor party. 504 00:25:21,269 --> 00:25:23,772 I just wanted to celebrate our friendship. 505 00:25:35,033 --> 00:25:38,036 Y-You know, I'm hungry, if you wanted to grab a bite to eat. 506 00:25:39,162 --> 00:25:41,331 - We could go to that Chinese place. - Yeah. 507 00:25:42,374 --> 00:25:44,209 - Can you give me a hand? Yeah. - Yeah, I can do that. 508 00:25:54,344 --> 00:25:56,513 You know we're gonna be friends till the end. 509 00:25:57,055 --> 00:25:58,721 Oh God. 510 00:25:58,722 --> 00:26:01,766 I'm fine. You don't have to say anything nice to me. 511 00:26:01,767 --> 00:26:03,851 Especially not while making eye contact. 512 00:26:03,852 --> 00:26:06,688 What if we went behind our menus? 513 00:26:06,689 --> 00:26:09,276 That-That-That c-- That could work, yeah. 514 00:26:10,443 --> 00:26:12,819 I didn't have a bachelor party 515 00:26:12,820 --> 00:26:14,612 first time I got married, 516 00:26:14,613 --> 00:26:16,948 and I didn't have a best man. 517 00:26:16,949 --> 00:26:20,785 And it's okay if I don't have a bachelor party this time, too. 518 00:26:20,786 --> 00:26:23,748 But I do want you to be my best man. 519 00:26:24,624 --> 00:26:25,957 Hmm. 520 00:26:25,958 --> 00:26:27,375 Noodles look good. 521 00:26:27,376 --> 00:26:29,127 And if it would make you feel better, 522 00:26:29,128 --> 00:26:32,215 you can be my Life Alert contact in case I fall. 523 00:26:33,383 --> 00:26:35,925 And we can get colonoscopies together. 524 00:26:35,926 --> 00:26:38,386 Yeah, yeah. Uh, 525 00:26:38,387 --> 00:26:40,054 maybe the dumplings? 526 00:26:40,055 --> 00:26:41,806 Can I get you something to drink? 527 00:26:41,807 --> 00:26:44,477 - Oh, uh, two Johnnie Walkers. - Of course. 528 00:26:52,152 --> 00:26:53,818 Where are you going? 529 00:26:53,819 --> 00:26:55,236 W-A-N-S. 530 00:26:55,237 --> 00:26:57,657 - W-A-N-S? - Here you are. 531 00:27:00,243 --> 00:27:01,993 Ah, the whiskey. 532 00:27:01,994 --> 00:27:03,786 And... 533 00:27:03,787 --> 00:27:06,374 our naughty secret. 534 00:27:24,934 --> 00:27:26,686 Very good. 535 00:27:27,270 --> 00:27:28,811 I know this is... 536 00:27:28,812 --> 00:27:31,274 not the bachelor party you dreamed of, but... 537 00:27:32,233 --> 00:27:33,608 still... 538 00:27:33,609 --> 00:27:35,152 Charles, it's perfect. 539 00:27:37,781 --> 00:27:40,283 Although, we are missing the A-lister. Just saying... 540 00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:45,121 You? 541 00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:48,748 Oh. Okay, Charles. Uh... 542 00:27:48,749 --> 00:27:50,208 let me hide behind my menu 543 00:27:50,209 --> 00:27:52,795 until the awkwardness of this moment clears. 544 00:27:56,549 --> 00:28:00,011 Hi. I don't have a reservation, but, uh, you know, table for one. 545 00:28:00,512 --> 00:28:02,512 You gotta be kidding me. 546 00:28:02,513 --> 00:28:03,848 What? 547 00:28:05,642 --> 00:28:08,645 The A-lister! You did it! 548 00:28:09,229 --> 00:28:10,563 Oh, my God! 549 00:28:11,022 --> 00:28:13,272 It's you! Ollie! 550 00:28:13,273 --> 00:28:14,858 - It's Ron-Ron! - Ron-Ron! 551 00:28:19,072 --> 00:28:23,034 I loved it in Mayberry when you'd go down by the fishin' hole! 552 00:28:23,993 --> 00:28:27,371 Don't ever mention the fishin' hole. 553 00:28:28,623 --> 00:28:31,333 - Okay, let it go. Come on. Shake it off. - Don't. 554 00:28:38,049 --> 00:28:39,632 Oh, Mabel, thank God! 555 00:28:39,633 --> 00:28:41,467 Bev said you agreed to help with the new pages. 556 00:28:41,468 --> 00:28:44,679 Fuck. Look, Marshall, I'm not in the mood for this right now. 557 00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:48,057 Please, i-it'll be quick. D-Do you think Mabel would say, 558 00:28:48,058 --> 00:28:50,435 "The name's Mora, Mabel Mora." 559 00:28:50,436 --> 00:28:53,396 Or, "I'm Mabel Fucking Mora!" 560 00:28:53,397 --> 00:28:54,480 I'm thinking number two. 561 00:28:54,481 --> 00:28:57,400 - I wouldn't say either one of those. - Oh God. 562 00:28:57,401 --> 00:28:59,612 It-It's-It's awful. I-I'm awful. 563 00:29:00,238 --> 00:29:03,114 Please. Bev is threatening to fire me if I don't get these right. 564 00:29:03,115 --> 00:29:05,408 I-I'll do anything. I-I'm stuck. I just... 565 00:29:05,409 --> 00:29:07,118 I can't capture your voice. 566 00:29:07,119 --> 00:29:10,246 Yeah, well, I don't think my voice needs to be captured. 567 00:29:10,247 --> 00:29:12,081 Another person is dead, 568 00:29:12,082 --> 00:29:14,417 and had I solved the case 569 00:29:14,418 --> 00:29:17,462 or figured out the stuntman angle sooner, 570 00:29:17,463 --> 00:29:20,715 he'd still be alive. But, he's not. 571 00:29:20,716 --> 00:29:23,136 Wow. That... 572 00:29:23,887 --> 00:29:25,972 is some Mabel dialogue. 573 00:29:26,681 --> 00:29:28,933 D-Do you mind if I just-- I'm gonna-- 574 00:29:33,188 --> 00:29:34,896 So then, Hanks leans over to me, 575 00:29:34,897 --> 00:29:36,522 and he says, 576 00:29:36,523 --> 00:29:39,108 "I don't actually like ranch dressing." 577 00:29:39,109 --> 00:29:40,985 Oh! That's good. 578 00:29:40,986 --> 00:29:43,029 Hey, uh, Ron. Uh, speaking of funny stories, 579 00:29:43,030 --> 00:29:46,449 we heard there was quite the snafu on Project Ronkonkoma. 580 00:29:46,450 --> 00:29:49,037 Gonna need another whiskey for that one. 581 00:29:49,913 --> 00:29:53,249 We never even finished it. I remember everything about it though. 582 00:29:56,294 --> 00:29:58,213 You know, 583 00:29:59,172 --> 00:30:01,130 it's always tense on the sets, 584 00:30:01,131 --> 00:30:03,466 days when there's gonna be a big stunt, 585 00:30:03,467 --> 00:30:06,221 and doubly so when fire is involved. 586 00:30:06,346 --> 00:30:08,471 Set and action! 587 00:30:08,472 --> 00:30:10,014 But, everything went smooth. 588 00:30:10,015 --> 00:30:12,308 The van screeched to a halt. 589 00:30:12,309 --> 00:30:16,020 A stuntman was thrown out onto the ground, 590 00:30:16,021 --> 00:30:19,941 doused with gasoline, lit on fire. It was exactly right. 591 00:30:19,942 --> 00:30:21,025 Bitchin'! 592 00:30:21,026 --> 00:30:22,610 So, I yelled "cut." 593 00:30:22,611 --> 00:30:24,695 Okay, cut! Fire out! 594 00:30:24,696 --> 00:30:26,948 They put the guy out. 595 00:30:26,949 --> 00:30:28,950 Okay, uh, let's go to the Steadicam. 596 00:30:28,951 --> 00:30:33,204 Except the guy didn't wait to make sure he was completely out. 597 00:30:33,205 --> 00:30:35,915 Next thing I know, he's walking toward me. 598 00:30:35,916 --> 00:30:36,999 Hey, great job. 599 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,460 Saying he had something he wanted to show me. 600 00:30:39,461 --> 00:30:42,880 - And-and suddenly, he reignites! - 601 00:30:42,881 --> 00:30:45,800 Oh! Ah! 602 00:30:45,801 --> 00:30:47,554 Geez whiz! 603 00:30:48,054 --> 00:30:50,139 Burned my eyebrows off! 604 00:30:53,017 --> 00:30:55,643 Okay, I know that I say fuck a lot, 605 00:30:55,644 --> 00:30:59,107 but not that fucking much. 606 00:31:03,486 --> 00:31:04,986 Yeah, maybe you're right. 607 00:31:04,987 --> 00:31:07,196 I should have more faith in myself. 608 00:31:07,197 --> 00:31:08,781 I mean, it worked for you. 609 00:31:08,782 --> 00:31:10,408 - You want a beer? - Hit me. 610 00:31:10,409 --> 00:31:14,413 - You finally got one of your scripts made. - That's right. I did. 611 00:31:16,291 --> 00:31:19,002 What is...? 612 00:31:21,462 --> 00:31:23,880 - Ron, Ron, Ron-Ron... - Ron-Ron. 613 00:31:23,881 --> 00:31:27,049 ...uh, we need to find that stuntman. 614 00:31:27,050 --> 00:31:29,510 Well, if you do, get my shoes back for me, will ya? 615 00:31:29,511 --> 00:31:31,721 He stole 'em right outta my trailer. 616 00:31:31,722 --> 00:31:34,807 I had to buy another pair. I can't work without these. 617 00:31:34,808 --> 00:31:37,395 They've got extra cushioning in the heels. 618 00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:41,983 - Same as on the radiator. - That's our guy. 619 00:31:42,901 --> 00:31:44,400 D-Do you remember his name? 620 00:31:44,401 --> 00:31:45,985 Oh, I'll never forget him. 621 00:31:45,986 --> 00:31:47,363 Rex Bailey. 622 00:31:48,114 --> 00:31:50,323 I have a photo of him, if that helps. 623 00:31:50,324 --> 00:31:54,201 I always keep, uh, pictures of people I ban from my sets. 624 00:31:54,202 --> 00:31:55,705 Uh... 625 00:31:56,289 --> 00:31:58,206 Oh, okay, here he is. 626 00:32:00,793 --> 00:32:02,253 Huh? 627 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:05,254 That kinda looks like... 628 00:32:05,255 --> 00:32:07,423 Yeah, but imagine with a beard. 629 00:32:07,424 --> 00:32:09,842 And add some glasses. 630 00:32:09,843 --> 00:32:11,762 And a dark bowl cut! 631 00:32:16,267 --> 00:32:18,018 Oh, my God. 632 00:32:20,063 --> 00:32:21,146 Whoa! 633 00:32:22,982 --> 00:32:25,191 That was some flip! 634 00:32:25,192 --> 00:32:27,318 You ever stunted before? 635 00:32:27,319 --> 00:32:29,195 I'm trying to be a writer, 636 00:32:29,196 --> 00:32:32,031 but I wouldn't say no to getting on set. 637 00:32:32,032 --> 00:32:35,912 Your first professional fire stunt. Ah! Ready? 638 00:32:36,245 --> 00:32:37,870 Fire out! 639 00:32:37,871 --> 00:32:39,830 Okay, let's go to the Steadicam, and I know I said... 640 00:32:39,831 --> 00:32:41,499 Mr. Howard? Mr. Howard! 641 00:32:41,500 --> 00:32:42,959 Hey, great job. 642 00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:44,462 Would you read my screenplay? 643 00:32:45,296 --> 00:32:47,173 Ah, when'd you grow the beard, lassie? 644 00:32:48,299 --> 00:32:51,133 What? It's you? 645 00:32:51,134 --> 00:32:52,887 What are... 646 00:33:20,623 --> 00:33:22,667 - Marshall? - Hm? 647 00:33:23,084 --> 00:33:26,754 Why does this script say it was written by Sazz Pataki?