1 00:00:10,061 --> 00:00:13,061 [dramatic orchestral music] 2 00:00:13,063 --> 00:00:20,065 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:22,061 --> 00:00:25,060 [choir vocalizing] 4 00:00:25,062 --> 00:00:32,064 ♪ ♪ 5 00:00:42,053 --> 00:00:44,055 [silverware clanking] 6 00:00:45,056 --> 00:00:47,064 - Excuse me, you there, Mary. 7 00:00:47,066 --> 00:00:49,048 - Yes, Your Majesty. 8 00:00:49,050 --> 00:00:50,062 - Can you donate this to a soup kitchen 9 00:00:50,064 --> 00:00:53,056 and bring me something I can fucking eat? 10 00:00:53,058 --> 00:00:54,066 - Mummy, would you like my eggs? 11 00:00:55,044 --> 00:00:56,050 They're very yummy. 12 00:00:56,052 --> 00:00:57,061 - Yeah, I want to eat off your plate 13 00:00:57,063 --> 00:01:00,046 like we live in a fucking trailer park. 14 00:01:00,048 --> 00:01:02,061 Do you ever listen to yourself? 15 00:01:02,063 --> 00:01:04,044 - No, Mummy, I don't. 16 00:01:04,046 --> 00:01:05,059 And it was actually Camilla's idea 17 00:01:05,061 --> 00:01:06,063 I offer you the eggs. 18 00:01:06,065 --> 00:01:08,061 Please forgive me, darling. 19 00:01:08,063 --> 00:01:10,047 I hate myself. 20 00:01:10,049 --> 00:01:11,060 - Ma'am, it's the prime minister. 21 00:01:11,062 --> 00:01:12,062 - Hello? 22 00:01:12,064 --> 00:01:14,058 Well, did you fuck her? 23 00:01:14,060 --> 00:01:16,054 All right, I'll take care of it. 24 00:01:16,056 --> 00:01:17,061 You don't talk to anyone 25 00:01:17,063 --> 00:01:20,044 until you get my call, understand? 26 00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:21,052 Thank you, Mary. 27 00:01:21,054 --> 00:01:24,053 - Grandpa, are you eating the paper? 28 00:01:24,055 --> 00:01:27,062 - [munching and slurping] 29 00:01:27,064 --> 00:01:29,048 - That's new. 30 00:01:29,050 --> 00:01:31,063 - Well, I have an appointment. Please excuse me. 31 00:01:31,065 --> 00:01:34,047 Would you tell the children I'll be home later? 32 00:01:34,049 --> 00:01:36,053 - I'm sitting right next to you. 33 00:01:36,055 --> 00:01:38,044 - Where are you going? - Out. 34 00:01:38,046 --> 00:01:39,063 Don't worry, I'll be back in time to watch the servants 35 00:01:39,065 --> 00:01:42,047 put the children to bed from my phone. 36 00:01:43,046 --> 00:01:45,049 - That's a good mother, 37 00:01:45,051 --> 00:01:46,050 hands-on. 38 00:01:46,052 --> 00:01:48,058 - I was breastfed by a servant. 39 00:01:48,060 --> 00:01:50,053 - Yes, but she watched. 40 00:01:50,055 --> 00:01:53,052 - Is there anything you need before I leave for my day off, 41 00:01:53,054 --> 00:01:54,054 Your Royal Highness? 42 00:01:54,056 --> 00:01:55,056 - Your day off? 43 00:01:55,058 --> 00:01:57,055 Didn't you just have a day off? 44 00:01:57,057 --> 00:01:59,049 When do you actually work? 45 00:01:59,051 --> 00:02:00,065 - It's been about a month, sir. 46 00:02:01,043 --> 00:02:02,063 - Must be nice to have your life. 47 00:02:02,065 --> 00:02:04,065 All right, well, go if you're going. 48 00:02:05,043 --> 00:02:07,051 - If you need anything at all, sir, don't hesitate-- 49 00:02:07,053 --> 00:02:10,047 - Owen, Owen, just leave, for God's sake. 50 00:02:10,049 --> 00:02:11,054 I think I'll be fine 51 00:02:11,056 --> 00:02:13,061 without whatever it is you think you do. 52 00:02:13,063 --> 00:02:14,064 - Of course, sir. 53 00:02:14,066 --> 00:02:16,050 - Bye-eee. 54 00:02:16,052 --> 00:02:19,058 - Okay, now he's eating the centerpiece. 55 00:02:19,060 --> 00:02:23,051 - [munching and gulping] 56 00:02:23,053 --> 00:02:25,047 - It's fine. 57 00:02:27,059 --> 00:02:28,062 - Are you okay? 58 00:02:28,064 --> 00:02:30,060 - Why haven't you touched me lately? 59 00:02:30,062 --> 00:02:32,062 - Can we not talk about this now? 60 00:02:32,064 --> 00:02:33,064 - Well, I'm off. 61 00:02:33,066 --> 00:02:35,050 I'll see everyone tomorrow. 62 00:02:35,052 --> 00:02:36,066 - Big plans, then, Owen? 63 00:02:37,044 --> 00:02:38,056 - Oh, nothing much. 64 00:02:38,058 --> 00:02:40,051 Well, ta-ta. 65 00:02:40,053 --> 00:02:42,060 - Bye, Owen! Have fun! 66 00:02:42,062 --> 00:02:44,047 I'd go home and slit my throat 67 00:02:44,049 --> 00:02:46,059 if I had to look after that kid all day. 68 00:02:47,057 --> 00:02:49,045 Don't. 69 00:02:49,047 --> 00:02:50,053 - N...now, then, 70 00:02:50,055 --> 00:02:52,066 can I get anyone a nice cuppa? 71 00:02:53,044 --> 00:02:55,059 Teddy? - Yeah, thanks, Kev. 72 00:02:56,062 --> 00:02:58,057 Fuckin' love Kev. 73 00:02:59,047 --> 00:03:01,047 [brakes squeal] 74 00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:03,048 - Morning, Owen. 75 00:03:03,050 --> 00:03:04,064 - Morning, Clive. 76 00:03:09,066 --> 00:03:11,057 [cell phone dings] 77 00:03:14,047 --> 00:03:16,054 [keyboard tapping, text message swooshes] 78 00:03:20,055 --> 00:03:22,043 [text message swooshes] 79 00:03:23,062 --> 00:03:24,061 [brakes squeal] 80 00:03:24,063 --> 00:03:26,044 - Have a good day, Owen. 81 00:03:26,046 --> 00:03:27,065 - You too, Clive. 82 00:03:28,058 --> 00:03:31,058 [bright orchestral music] 83 00:03:31,060 --> 00:03:38,054 ♪ ♪ 84 00:03:38,056 --> 00:03:40,050 [FaceTime rings] 85 00:03:40,052 --> 00:03:43,043 - Hello? - Hey, is this a bad time? 86 00:03:43,045 --> 00:03:44,061 - Of course not, Your Royal Highness. 87 00:03:44,063 --> 00:03:46,050 - So I found the socks. 88 00:03:46,052 --> 00:03:49,043 I sent you back a smiley emoji, by the way. 89 00:03:49,045 --> 00:03:50,053 - Yes, I saw that. 90 00:03:50,055 --> 00:03:52,044 - Oh, well, you didn't respond. 91 00:03:52,046 --> 00:03:54,055 - Morning, Owen! - Morning, Dan! 92 00:03:54,057 --> 00:03:56,054 I sent you a thumbs-up on it, sir. 93 00:03:56,056 --> 00:03:58,052 - Oh, okay, I must have missed that. 94 00:03:58,054 --> 00:03:59,066 Anyway, I was wondering which-- 95 00:04:00,044 --> 00:04:02,050 - Hello, Owen. - Hello, Faye! 96 00:04:02,052 --> 00:04:04,056 - I was wondering which remote I use 97 00:04:04,058 --> 00:04:07,047 to go from Apple TV back to cable. 98 00:04:07,049 --> 00:04:08,066 - The small silver one, sir. 99 00:04:09,044 --> 00:04:10,056 - Yeah, I tried that one. 100 00:04:10,058 --> 00:04:12,043 - Fresh blackberries today, Owen? 101 00:04:12,045 --> 00:04:14,056 - I'll come by later for some, Samuel. 102 00:04:14,058 --> 00:04:16,052 - You're doing that walk through town 103 00:04:16,054 --> 00:04:18,047 like you're fucking Belle in "Beauty and the Beast." 104 00:04:18,049 --> 00:04:20,047 Jesus Christ, do you know how annoying it is 105 00:04:20,049 --> 00:04:21,053 for me on my end? 106 00:04:21,055 --> 00:04:22,059 - I apologize, sir. 107 00:04:22,061 --> 00:04:23,063 - Oh, okay, wait. 108 00:04:23,065 --> 00:04:25,049 The silver one is working now. 109 00:04:25,051 --> 00:04:26,051 - Splendid, sir. 110 00:04:26,053 --> 00:04:27,066 - It wasn't before, though. 111 00:04:28,044 --> 00:04:30,056 All right, well, I'm gonna watch "Below Deck." 112 00:04:30,058 --> 00:04:33,051 - Good morning, O-- - He's on the fucking phone! 113 00:04:33,053 --> 00:04:35,055 Okay, well, that's it on my end. 114 00:04:35,057 --> 00:04:36,057 Enjoy your day off. 115 00:04:36,059 --> 00:04:37,058 - If you need anything else-- 116 00:04:37,060 --> 00:04:38,065 - No, no, I'm good. 117 00:04:39,043 --> 00:04:40,061 I'll talk to you later. Ciao. 118 00:04:40,063 --> 00:04:42,045 [birds chirping] 119 00:04:42,047 --> 00:04:49,049 ♪ ♪ 120 00:04:55,050 --> 00:04:58,047 [FaceTime ringing] 121 00:04:58,049 --> 00:05:00,064 - Hello? - Hey. What are you doing? 122 00:05:00,066 --> 00:05:03,044 - Just making a cup of tea, sir. 123 00:05:03,046 --> 00:05:04,066 - Cool. I'm having tea too. 124 00:05:05,044 --> 00:05:07,066 So has it started raining there yet? 125 00:05:08,044 --> 00:05:09,055 - Not yet, no, sir. 126 00:05:09,057 --> 00:05:11,048 - That's good. That's good. 127 00:05:11,050 --> 00:05:12,054 Maybe it won't rain there, 128 00:05:12,056 --> 00:05:13,065 day off and all that. 129 00:05:14,043 --> 00:05:15,046 Ooh, are you in the kitchen? 130 00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,052 Show me your kitchen. 131 00:05:16,054 --> 00:05:17,062 - It's nothing much to speak of, 132 00:05:17,064 --> 00:05:19,052 Your Royal Highness. 133 00:05:19,054 --> 00:05:21,048 - It's cute, O. 134 00:05:21,050 --> 00:05:24,059 All right, well, I'll let you get back to your tea. 135 00:05:24,061 --> 00:05:25,060 - Goodbye, sir. 136 00:05:25,062 --> 00:05:28,049 - Yup. See you tomorrow. 137 00:05:38,059 --> 00:05:41,065 [birds chirping] 138 00:05:42,043 --> 00:05:44,059 [FaceTime ringing] 139 00:05:44,061 --> 00:05:46,057 - Hello? - Quick question. 140 00:05:46,059 --> 00:05:48,060 How long is an avocado good for? 141 00:05:48,062 --> 00:05:50,061 - They're good for several days, sir. 142 00:05:50,063 --> 00:05:53,045 - So if it's a little brown, it's still okay? 143 00:05:53,047 --> 00:05:54,059 - Yes, that should be fine, sir. 144 00:05:54,061 --> 00:05:56,063 - Yeah, thought so. Just checking. 145 00:05:56,065 --> 00:05:58,044 Is that your garden? 146 00:05:58,046 --> 00:06:00,057 - Yes. It's very, very small. 147 00:06:00,059 --> 00:06:02,065 - It's fucking adorable is what it is. 148 00:06:03,043 --> 00:06:05,045 Everything is so tiny and cute. 149 00:06:05,047 --> 00:06:07,055 It's like you live in a dollhouse, O. 150 00:06:07,057 --> 00:06:09,048 - It suits my needs, sir. 151 00:06:09,050 --> 00:06:12,044 - Anyway, I gotta go, but thanks for calling. 152 00:06:16,044 --> 00:06:17,062 [soft piano music] 153 00:06:17,064 --> 00:06:19,053 [laughter, indistinct chatter] 154 00:06:19,055 --> 00:06:22,058 ♪ ♪ 155 00:06:22,060 --> 00:06:23,066 - I don't have long. 156 00:06:24,044 --> 00:06:25,057 I told William I was serving porridge 157 00:06:25,059 --> 00:06:26,058 to battered women. 158 00:06:26,060 --> 00:06:28,047 - Then let's get to it. 159 00:06:28,049 --> 00:06:30,049 So you're positive you want to leave your husband? 160 00:06:30,051 --> 00:06:32,062 - Yes! I've already found a place to live. 161 00:06:32,064 --> 00:06:34,058 And I'm applying for a job at goop. 162 00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:36,057 - [gasps] Ooh, goop. 163 00:06:36,059 --> 00:06:39,055 Well, I'll start working on the papers, then. 164 00:06:39,057 --> 00:06:41,048 - Nobody must know. 165 00:06:41,050 --> 00:06:42,064 I fear for my life. 166 00:06:42,066 --> 00:06:43,062 - Really? 167 00:06:43,064 --> 00:06:45,043 - Well, not really, 168 00:06:45,045 --> 00:06:46,064 but, you know, it's bad there. 169 00:06:46,066 --> 00:06:49,047 - Can I ask, what's the queen like? 170 00:06:49,049 --> 00:06:50,049 Is she nice? 171 00:06:50,051 --> 00:06:52,061 - She's a fucking nightmare. 172 00:06:52,063 --> 00:06:54,054 I'll be in touch. 173 00:06:57,048 --> 00:07:01,046 [FaceTime ringing] 174 00:07:01,048 --> 00:07:03,048 - Hello, sir. - Hey. 175 00:07:03,050 --> 00:07:04,057 I'm bored. 176 00:07:04,059 --> 00:07:06,049 Anything going on over there? 177 00:07:06,051 --> 00:07:08,051 - No, no, nothing at all. 178 00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:10,055 - Hello, Owen. Good to see ya. 179 00:07:10,057 --> 00:07:11,057 - Hello, Toby. 180 00:07:11,059 --> 00:07:14,049 - Well, if it isn't Owen. 181 00:07:14,051 --> 00:07:15,051 - Hello, Vera. 182 00:07:15,053 --> 00:07:17,043 - Ugh, now you're at Cheers. 183 00:07:17,045 --> 00:07:18,065 - Where you been hidin', Owen? 184 00:07:19,043 --> 00:07:20,052 You haven't called. 185 00:07:20,054 --> 00:07:22,054 - Been meaning to, Vera. 186 00:07:22,056 --> 00:07:23,062 Work. 187 00:07:23,064 --> 00:07:24,066 Rock climbing. 188 00:07:25,044 --> 00:07:26,049 - Rock climbing? 189 00:07:26,051 --> 00:07:27,057 - Right. 190 00:07:27,059 --> 00:07:29,044 Sure. 191 00:07:29,046 --> 00:07:31,048 Usual? - Please. 192 00:07:32,050 --> 00:07:33,060 - Oh, my God. 193 00:07:33,062 --> 00:07:35,043 You're dating her. 194 00:07:35,045 --> 00:07:36,065 - We're just friends, sir. 195 00:07:37,043 --> 00:07:39,057 - O, O, O, 196 00:07:39,059 --> 00:07:41,045 you're dating her. 197 00:07:41,047 --> 00:07:42,060 - Here we are, now, Owen, 198 00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,048 pie and mash. 199 00:07:44,050 --> 00:07:46,059 - Well, I'll let you get back to Mrs. Lovett. 200 00:07:46,061 --> 00:07:48,053 - Who's that little tyke? 201 00:07:48,055 --> 00:07:50,057 Is that the little prince? 202 00:07:50,059 --> 00:07:51,065 - Yes, it is. 203 00:07:52,043 --> 00:07:53,064 - Don't. Don't put me on with-- 204 00:07:53,066 --> 00:07:55,058 Hi! 205 00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:57,056 How are you, dear? 206 00:07:57,058 --> 00:07:59,054 - 'Ello, sweetheart! 207 00:07:59,056 --> 00:08:02,047 - Oh, look at those teeth. How fun. 208 00:08:02,049 --> 00:08:04,047 - Bye, lovey. 209 00:08:04,063 --> 00:08:07,051 - Don't ever do that again. 210 00:08:07,053 --> 00:08:08,055 All right, go eat. 211 00:08:08,057 --> 00:08:11,043 Your cat pie is getting cold. 212 00:08:11,056 --> 00:08:13,047 - Can I get you anything else, Owen? 213 00:08:13,049 --> 00:08:14,052 - No, thank you, Vera. 214 00:08:14,054 --> 00:08:16,048 - Right, then, love. 215 00:08:16,050 --> 00:08:18,059 Give us a call sometime, eh? 216 00:08:22,058 --> 00:08:27,055 ♪ ♪ 217 00:08:27,057 --> 00:08:31,046 [birds chirping] 218 00:08:31,063 --> 00:08:33,049 - Evening, Owen. 219 00:08:33,051 --> 00:08:35,056 - Evening, Gladys! 220 00:08:52,058 --> 00:08:55,066 [FaceTime ringing] 221 00:08:56,044 --> 00:08:58,050 - Quick, turn on HGTV. 222 00:09:00,053 --> 00:09:02,058 - Hi, I'm Meghan Markle. 223 00:09:02,060 --> 00:09:04,058 - And I'm Harry... 224 00:09:04,060 --> 00:09:08,047 Harry. - And we're "Royally Screwed." 225 00:09:10,044 --> 00:09:11,053 - Each week, we take a house 226 00:09:11,055 --> 00:09:13,054 from drab... - To fab. 227 00:09:13,056 --> 00:09:15,062 The Anderson family had $75,000 228 00:09:15,064 --> 00:09:18,054 to renovate their three-bedroom ranch house. 229 00:09:18,056 --> 00:09:20,054 - It was our live savings. 230 00:09:20,056 --> 00:09:22,048 - Anderson family, do you remember 231 00:09:22,050 --> 00:09:24,056 what your house used to look like? 232 00:09:24,058 --> 00:09:27,048 Would you like to see what it looks like now? 233 00:09:27,050 --> 00:09:28,048 all: yeah! 234 00:09:28,050 --> 00:09:30,052 - Then come on in, guys. 235 00:09:33,044 --> 00:09:34,061 - Well? 236 00:09:34,063 --> 00:09:37,058 - It...it looks exactly the same. 237 00:09:37,060 --> 00:09:38,060 - Look closely. 238 00:09:38,062 --> 00:09:40,054 - I don't see any difference... 239 00:09:40,056 --> 00:09:42,052 at all. - Keep looking. 240 00:09:42,054 --> 00:09:43,058 - [gasps] I'm worried. 241 00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:44,059 - Shh. 242 00:09:44,061 --> 00:09:45,066 - Can I get a clue? 243 00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:47,060 - The kitchen. 244 00:09:48,061 --> 00:09:51,052 - I...I don't see it. 245 00:09:51,054 --> 00:09:53,046 - The backsplash? 246 00:09:53,048 --> 00:09:54,064 - Oh, right. 247 00:09:54,066 --> 00:09:55,064 That's new. 248 00:09:55,066 --> 00:09:57,051 - Huh? Huh? 249 00:09:57,053 --> 00:09:58,054 Do you love it? 250 00:09:58,056 --> 00:10:00,062 Real solid gold inlay. 251 00:10:00,064 --> 00:10:03,047 It makes the whole room pop. 252 00:10:03,049 --> 00:10:07,047 - You spent $75,000 on backsplash? 253 00:10:07,049 --> 00:10:08,059 - No. 254 00:10:08,061 --> 00:10:11,049 We spent $100,000! 255 00:10:11,051 --> 00:10:12,063 - [groans] 256 00:10:12,065 --> 00:10:15,063 - I told you we should've gone with the subway tile. 257 00:10:15,065 --> 00:10:16,063 [TV clicks off] 258 00:10:16,065 --> 00:10:17,066 - Well, they've been 259 00:10:18,044 --> 00:10:19,057 royally screwed, all right. 260 00:10:19,059 --> 00:10:22,051 - Owen, did you just make a joke? 261 00:10:22,053 --> 00:10:23,051 - I did, sir. 262 00:10:23,053 --> 00:10:25,047 - I fucking love that. 263 00:10:25,049 --> 00:10:28,044 Ugh, what worse can they do after this, sell insurance? 264 00:10:28,046 --> 00:10:29,056 Ooh, there's a "House Hunters" on now. 265 00:10:29,058 --> 00:10:31,052 I'm gonna watch that. 266 00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:34,053 ♪ ♪ 267 00:10:34,055 --> 00:10:36,047 [water running, faucet squeaks] 268 00:10:36,049 --> 00:10:40,044 ♪ ♪ 269 00:10:40,046 --> 00:10:42,043 [FaceTime rings] 270 00:10:42,045 --> 00:10:43,047 - Hello, sir. 271 00:10:43,049 --> 00:10:45,052 - Hey. I can't sleep. 272 00:10:45,054 --> 00:10:48,043 - Would you like me to tell you a story, sir? 273 00:10:48,045 --> 00:10:50,049 - No, I'm not a baby. 274 00:10:50,051 --> 00:10:52,044 What story? 275 00:10:55,045 --> 00:10:56,056 - Well... 276 00:10:56,058 --> 00:10:59,060 once upon a time, there was a very simple man 277 00:10:59,062 --> 00:11:03,058 who lived in a tiny house with a tiny garden, 278 00:11:03,060 --> 00:11:07,052 and he fell in love with a very simple woman. 279 00:11:07,054 --> 00:11:10,062 They took joy in the very simple things in life: 280 00:11:10,064 --> 00:11:15,047 a walk, a cup of tea, a smile. 281 00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:16,065 And those simple things made them feel 282 00:11:17,043 --> 00:11:19,061 like they were not so simple at all-- 283 00:11:19,063 --> 00:11:21,059 quite the opposite, in fact. 284 00:11:21,061 --> 00:11:24,059 It made them feel like the most special people 285 00:11:24,061 --> 00:11:26,057 in the world. 286 00:11:26,059 --> 00:11:28,065 And one day, they got married, 287 00:11:29,043 --> 00:11:33,056 and this very simple man suddenly became a king 288 00:11:33,058 --> 00:11:36,057 because he had found his queen. 289 00:11:36,059 --> 00:11:39,048 And the tiny house was their palace 290 00:11:39,050 --> 00:11:41,052 and the tiny garden their kingdom. 291 00:11:41,054 --> 00:11:45,050 And they lived happily for years and years 292 00:11:45,052 --> 00:11:48,057 until the queen got very sick and then... 293 00:11:48,059 --> 00:11:49,058 [sighs] 294 00:11:49,060 --> 00:11:53,048 In a breath, was gone. 295 00:11:53,050 --> 00:11:54,062 And the man went from being a king 296 00:11:54,064 --> 00:11:58,043 back to being very simple once again. 297 00:11:59,044 --> 00:12:00,060 But sometimes... 298 00:12:00,062 --> 00:12:04,057 late at night when it's very quiet, 299 00:12:04,059 --> 00:12:06,057 she comes to him, 300 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,062 and just for a moment... 301 00:12:10,056 --> 00:12:12,052 He is a king. 302 00:12:17,066 --> 00:12:19,064 Good night, George. 303 00:12:24,056 --> 00:12:27,049 [owl hooting] 304 00:12:29,056 --> 00:12:32,057 [bright orchestral music] 305 00:12:32,059 --> 00:12:39,061 ♪ ♪