1 00:00:10,060 --> 00:00:13,060 [dramatic orchestral music] 2 00:00:13,062 --> 00:00:20,064 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:23,055 --> 00:00:26,054 [choir vocalizing] 4 00:00:26,056 --> 00:00:33,058 ♪ ♪ 5 00:00:45,066 --> 00:00:48,044 - Tonight, there was a royal throwdown 6 00:00:48,046 --> 00:00:49,064 between the Queen of England 7 00:00:49,066 --> 00:00:52,054 and the Queen of QVC herself, 8 00:00:52,056 --> 00:00:53,065 Lisa Rinna. 9 00:00:54,043 --> 00:00:56,049 So, Lisa, where did you leave it with the Queen? 10 00:00:56,051 --> 00:00:58,050 Are you banned from England? - No. 11 00:00:58,052 --> 00:01:00,056 The queen and I are totally fine. 12 00:01:00,058 --> 00:01:01,065 We talked it over, 13 00:01:02,043 --> 00:01:03,065 and it was honestly just a misunderstanding. 14 00:01:04,043 --> 00:01:05,052 We're getting tea next week. 15 00:01:05,054 --> 00:01:07,047 - All right. Good to hear. 16 00:01:07,049 --> 00:01:10,044 Meghan, you seem pretty angry with Dorit 17 00:01:10,046 --> 00:01:12,059 over her behavior with the Queen's guards. 18 00:01:12,061 --> 00:01:15,050 - I just thought it was completely inappropriate 19 00:01:15,052 --> 00:01:17,050 and I just think if you're gonna pretend 20 00:01:17,052 --> 00:01:18,064 to have a British accent, 21 00:01:18,066 --> 00:01:21,053 maybe you can pretend to know the British customs too. 22 00:01:21,055 --> 00:01:22,066 [audience oohing] 23 00:01:23,044 --> 00:01:24,059 - Okay, we're gonna go to the phones. 24 00:01:24,061 --> 00:01:26,055 Caller, what's your question? 25 00:01:26,057 --> 00:01:29,044 - Hey, Andy, big fan. - Aww, thanks. 26 00:01:29,046 --> 00:01:31,043 - I love everything you do, and I've been watching you 27 00:01:31,045 --> 00:01:32,062 since I was three and I-- - Thanks, caller. 28 00:01:32,064 --> 00:01:35,044 What's your question? - Sorry. 29 00:01:35,046 --> 00:01:36,055 My question is for Meghan. 30 00:01:36,057 --> 00:01:38,054 Meghan, besides "Holder of Briefcase 24" 31 00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:40,047 on "Deal or No Deal," 32 00:01:40,049 --> 00:01:43,063 what do you think your most impactful role was? 33 00:01:43,065 --> 00:01:46,057 - Is this George? 34 00:01:46,059 --> 00:01:48,049 - I thought I made my voice 35 00:01:48,051 --> 00:01:51,049 sound different enough when I called in, but nuh-uh. 36 00:01:51,051 --> 00:01:53,066 - It was a very good effort, your Royal Highness. 37 00:01:54,044 --> 00:01:55,054 - Thanks, O. 38 00:01:55,056 --> 00:01:57,057 Ooh, put in my diary that I have a microcurrent facial 39 00:01:57,059 --> 00:01:59,063 with Joanna Vargas at 5:00 Monday. 40 00:01:59,065 --> 00:02:02,048 - Sir, I believe you have the Queen's charity event 41 00:02:02,050 --> 00:02:03,062 for Gorgensteins then. 42 00:02:03,064 --> 00:02:05,051 - With the fuck is Gorgensteins? 43 00:02:05,053 --> 00:02:06,061 I've never even heard of that. 44 00:02:06,063 --> 00:02:08,060 - I'm not actually sure myself, sir. 45 00:02:08,062 --> 00:02:10,046 - Ugh. So what am I wearing 46 00:02:10,048 --> 00:02:12,051 to this event I just found out about? 47 00:02:12,053 --> 00:02:15,060 - I took the liberty of setting something aside, sir. 48 00:02:17,049 --> 00:02:19,048 - Ooh. Who would have fucking guessed? 49 00:02:19,050 --> 00:02:21,062 A Peter Pan collared shirt with blue shorts. 50 00:02:21,064 --> 00:02:24,065 The same outfit you suggest every event. 51 00:02:25,043 --> 00:02:28,051 - I think you look very nice in this outfit, sir. 52 00:02:28,053 --> 00:02:30,047 - You know, maybe it's my fault, 53 00:02:30,049 --> 00:02:31,064 taking fashion advice from someone 54 00:02:31,066 --> 00:02:35,048 who's worn the same uniform every day for 55 years. 55 00:02:35,050 --> 00:02:36,065 - It's practical, sir. 56 00:02:37,043 --> 00:02:39,043 - You know, I have a uniform too, 57 00:02:39,045 --> 00:02:40,059 but I accessorize it. 58 00:02:40,061 --> 00:02:42,062 I wore a scarf with it just the other day. 59 00:02:42,064 --> 00:02:45,058 Burberry tartan will never go out of style. 60 00:02:45,060 --> 00:02:47,052 But you wouldn't know anything about that. 61 00:02:47,054 --> 00:02:50,061 - I feel very inadequate. I am very stupid, sir. 62 00:02:50,063 --> 00:02:52,061 - O, O! It's all right. 63 00:02:52,063 --> 00:02:54,064 Don't cry. Jesus. 64 00:02:54,066 --> 00:02:58,054 I'm just stressed, okay? Give yourself a hug for me. 65 00:02:58,056 --> 00:03:01,045 Go on. Do it. 66 00:03:02,058 --> 00:03:05,064 Did my hug make you feel better? 67 00:03:05,066 --> 00:03:09,044 Good. Now, I don't want to look nice. 68 00:03:09,046 --> 00:03:12,056 I want to look iconic. I need a stylist. 69 00:03:12,058 --> 00:03:14,044 Who dresses Kaley Cuoco? 70 00:03:14,046 --> 00:03:15,059 She always looks cute and fresh. 71 00:03:15,061 --> 00:03:17,052 - I don't know who that is, sir. 72 00:03:17,054 --> 00:03:19,047 - You don't know who anyone is. 73 00:03:19,049 --> 00:03:22,048 Brad Goreski styles her. I'm gonna DM him. 74 00:03:22,050 --> 00:03:24,065 I don't blame you, Owen. You just don't know any better. 75 00:03:25,043 --> 00:03:27,065 Give yourself a little playful punch on the shoulder. 76 00:03:30,044 --> 00:03:31,059 There you go. 77 00:03:31,061 --> 00:03:33,049 - I'll get you the documents, 78 00:03:33,051 --> 00:03:36,046 but I'm going to need more time. 79 00:03:36,048 --> 00:03:37,058 Hi, George. 80 00:03:37,060 --> 00:03:42,043 - What--were you just-- never mind. 81 00:03:42,045 --> 00:03:45,052 - [groaning] 82 00:03:46,065 --> 00:03:49,058 Spot me, boy. Spot me, son. 83 00:03:51,052 --> 00:03:54,050 Georgie. [huffing] 84 00:03:54,052 --> 00:03:56,045 Georgie. 85 00:03:56,047 --> 00:03:58,057 Get 'ere, now. 86 00:03:58,059 --> 00:04:02,059 [dramatic music] 87 00:04:02,061 --> 00:04:05,066 - Hey, who do you have to fuck to get a mimosa around here? 88 00:04:06,044 --> 00:04:07,054 - I apologize, your Royal Highness. 89 00:04:07,056 --> 00:04:09,055 Right away. - [babbling] 90 00:04:09,057 --> 00:04:11,066 - Make it two, Mary. 91 00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:13,052 - I'll have another as well. 92 00:04:13,054 --> 00:04:15,058 - Maybe just orange juice for Kate. 93 00:04:15,060 --> 00:04:19,055 - Maybe just champagne. 94 00:04:21,051 --> 00:04:23,043 - Yay, yay, yay, yay. 95 00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:26,054 - A little buzzy buzzy for my good boy, hmm? 96 00:04:26,056 --> 00:04:29,061 - Mummy, Camilla had a smashing idea. 97 00:04:29,063 --> 00:04:31,065 Yes, darling. We decided. 98 00:04:32,043 --> 00:04:34,058 She's going to cohost the Gorgensteins charity event 99 00:04:34,060 --> 00:04:37,054 with you, Mummy. - She couldn't cohost a shit. 100 00:04:37,056 --> 00:04:40,063 - That's hilarious, Gan Gan. 101 00:04:40,065 --> 00:04:45,050 I-I don't really get it, but it's still hilarious. 102 00:04:47,049 --> 00:04:50,060 - Get him a bib, you half-wit. 103 00:04:50,062 --> 00:04:53,047 - Mummy and Camilla! Camilla and Mummy! 104 00:04:53,049 --> 00:04:55,060 You two are going to smash it. 105 00:04:55,062 --> 00:04:57,060 - The only thing I'm gonna smash right now 106 00:04:57,062 --> 00:04:59,044 is your thick head. 107 00:04:59,046 --> 00:05:02,050 And what the bloody hell is Gorgensteins? 108 00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:03,065 - It's that disease, right? 109 00:05:04,043 --> 00:05:06,045 - I thought it was a type of plant. 110 00:05:06,047 --> 00:05:07,055 - Could it be both? 111 00:05:07,057 --> 00:05:09,047 - I'm warning you all right now, though, 112 00:05:09,049 --> 00:05:11,044 Camilla is an amazing speaker, 113 00:05:11,046 --> 00:05:13,050 and she has a barnburner of a speech 114 00:05:13,052 --> 00:05:15,044 all locked and loaded. 115 00:05:15,046 --> 00:05:18,046 Care to give us a little sneak preview, Camilla? 116 00:05:18,048 --> 00:05:21,055 Ooh, she's saving it all for the big night. 117 00:05:21,057 --> 00:05:25,066 - Yeah, I don't really get her appeal yet, to be honest. 118 00:05:30,066 --> 00:05:33,048 - Can you stop with the fucking gum? 119 00:05:33,050 --> 00:05:35,052 - All right, I know we've been short staffed lately, 120 00:05:35,054 --> 00:05:37,045 so I think you'll be excited to hear 121 00:05:37,047 --> 00:05:39,064 I'm interviewing a young lad later today. 122 00:05:39,066 --> 00:05:41,057 Please make him feel at home 123 00:05:41,059 --> 00:05:44,043 as he'll most likely die here along with the rest of us. 124 00:05:44,045 --> 00:05:46,060 - I hope the new guy's hot. - Stop. 125 00:05:46,062 --> 00:05:48,061 You think? He could be our third. 126 00:05:48,063 --> 00:05:50,057 - I thought we were just joking about that. 127 00:05:50,059 --> 00:05:52,044 - Oh, yeah. We totally were. 128 00:05:52,046 --> 00:05:54,047 I was just doing a joke off of that. 129 00:05:54,049 --> 00:05:55,052 - Oh. 130 00:05:55,054 --> 00:05:57,065 Look, if you're bored-- - I'm not! 131 00:05:59,050 --> 00:06:00,066 - So here's the deal, Brad. 132 00:06:01,044 --> 00:06:04,054 I have a big charity event this Monday for Gorgensteins. 133 00:06:04,056 --> 00:06:05,061 You're familiar? 134 00:06:05,063 --> 00:06:08,055 - Of course, so sad. 135 00:06:08,057 --> 00:06:11,045 - Right. 136 00:06:11,047 --> 00:06:12,060 So I wanna look chic, 137 00:06:12,062 --> 00:06:15,047 but I don't wanna look like I'm trying too hard. 138 00:06:15,049 --> 00:06:17,061 What's on trend right now? What do you love? 139 00:06:17,063 --> 00:06:19,053 - Well, I love what Balmain is doing 140 00:06:19,055 --> 00:06:22,045 with their summer collection, Balenciaga sneakers. 141 00:06:22,047 --> 00:06:25,052 I think crossbody bags are-- - Stop right there. 142 00:06:25,054 --> 00:06:28,048 I love everything you're saying. 143 00:06:28,050 --> 00:06:30,049 I think we're gonna be best friends. 144 00:06:30,051 --> 00:06:32,043 See, Owen? Brad gets fashion 145 00:06:32,045 --> 00:06:33,051 like I get fashion. 146 00:06:33,053 --> 00:06:35,044 What do you think of Burberry tartan? 147 00:06:35,046 --> 00:06:38,043 - Oh, God, it's so tired. 148 00:06:38,045 --> 00:06:41,049 - [laughs] Totally. 149 00:06:42,051 --> 00:06:44,052 [knock at door] 150 00:06:44,054 --> 00:06:48,049 - Ah, you must be here for the job interview. 151 00:06:51,050 --> 00:06:54,057 Well, come in. Come in, sit. 152 00:06:54,059 --> 00:06:57,063 So we're looking for a rock star-- 153 00:06:57,065 --> 00:07:00,053 an all-round team player with a high degree 154 00:07:00,055 --> 00:07:02,058 of coordination, mental fortitude, 155 00:07:02,060 --> 00:07:06,047 and, most importantly, thick skin. 156 00:07:06,049 --> 00:07:07,066 Turnover can be high, 157 00:07:08,044 --> 00:07:10,066 but if you can get through the first couple of years, 158 00:07:11,044 --> 00:07:13,054 it's the best job in the world. 159 00:07:13,056 --> 00:07:16,054 - Hey, Philip shit all over the stairs again. 160 00:07:16,056 --> 00:07:19,048 I'd go up, but I'm on break. 161 00:07:20,050 --> 00:07:23,047 - Exciting stuff happening all the time here. 162 00:07:23,049 --> 00:07:27,045 Let's see your CV. 163 00:07:27,047 --> 00:07:29,045 Hmm. 164 00:07:29,047 --> 00:07:31,062 Not much hospitality experience, 165 00:07:31,064 --> 00:07:34,059 and I don't see a name on here. 166 00:07:34,061 --> 00:07:38,044 I think this is just a napkin. 167 00:07:38,046 --> 00:07:40,051 - Keebeen. 168 00:07:40,053 --> 00:07:42,047 - I... 169 00:07:42,049 --> 00:07:44,055 I don't know what that means. 170 00:07:44,057 --> 00:07:46,049 Is that your name? 171 00:07:46,051 --> 00:07:48,052 - Keeebeeen. 172 00:07:48,054 --> 00:07:51,061 - Kevin? Your name's Kevin? 173 00:07:51,063 --> 00:07:53,056 - Keebeen. 174 00:07:53,058 --> 00:07:55,055 - Kevin, you're hired. 175 00:07:55,057 --> 00:07:57,061 And if you have any friends who you think might be up 176 00:07:57,063 --> 00:08:00,057 to the task, let us know. Or any family. 177 00:08:00,059 --> 00:08:03,058 [mysterious music] 178 00:08:03,060 --> 00:08:07,057 ♪ ♪ 179 00:08:07,059 --> 00:08:10,061 - No...family. 180 00:08:10,063 --> 00:08:12,062 [flames crackling, faint shrieking] 181 00:08:12,064 --> 00:08:14,055 - All right, lad. Here's an apron 182 00:08:14,057 --> 00:08:17,059 and a shit bucket. Welcome aboard. 183 00:08:17,061 --> 00:08:21,048 - This seems so boring. Too safe. 184 00:08:21,050 --> 00:08:22,054 Ugh, and it feels cheap. 185 00:08:22,056 --> 00:08:25,051 - It's Armani. - Armani Exchange? 186 00:08:25,053 --> 00:08:27,056 - Armani. But I totally get it. 187 00:08:27,058 --> 00:08:28,062 Don't worry. 188 00:08:28,064 --> 00:08:30,048 Why don't we try the next look? 189 00:08:30,050 --> 00:08:32,048 I have a feeling you love it. 190 00:08:32,050 --> 00:08:35,057 - [sighs] Fine. 191 00:08:35,059 --> 00:08:39,047 None of these outfits are even worth doing a montage. 192 00:08:40,058 --> 00:08:44,058 - You look amazing, and it's definitely not boring. 193 00:08:46,057 --> 00:08:48,064 - I look like a chubby little Lorax. 194 00:08:48,066 --> 00:08:51,052 - No way. I think you look great, 195 00:08:51,054 --> 00:08:53,052 and it really brings out your eyes. 196 00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:55,049 - I look like I should be directing air traffic 197 00:08:55,051 --> 00:08:56,054 at Heathrow. 198 00:08:56,056 --> 00:08:57,064 - Are there a lot more of these? 199 00:08:57,066 --> 00:08:59,049 - Just the two. 200 00:08:59,051 --> 00:09:01,052 Why would you even fucking suggest this? 201 00:09:01,054 --> 00:09:04,052 - But you asked for this suit to be shipped from Milan. 202 00:09:04,054 --> 00:09:06,046 - Yeah, well, I didn't ask for your attitude. 203 00:09:06,048 --> 00:09:08,060 Does that come complementary with your shit service? 204 00:09:08,062 --> 00:09:12,044 Owen, see this man out. 205 00:09:12,046 --> 00:09:14,061 - I'm sorry, Mr. Goreski. - It's all right. 206 00:09:14,063 --> 00:09:16,062 I used to dress Anne Hathaway. 207 00:09:18,044 --> 00:09:20,065 - Thank you for all you're doing with Gorgensteins. 208 00:09:21,043 --> 00:09:22,058 - No, thank you. 209 00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:24,056 We couldn't do it without your help. 210 00:09:24,058 --> 00:09:26,065 - We met at last year's garden party. 211 00:09:27,043 --> 00:09:30,045 Do you remember me? Patsy. 212 00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:33,059 - Yes, of course! Patsy. 213 00:09:33,061 --> 00:09:35,051 I saw you the second you walked in 214 00:09:35,053 --> 00:09:39,055 and I said, "There's dear Patsy." 215 00:09:39,057 --> 00:09:41,064 Kill me. 216 00:09:41,066 --> 00:09:44,057 - You never should have told me to get a stylist, Owen. 217 00:09:44,059 --> 00:09:47,045 Brad stunk. - I apologize, sir. 218 00:09:47,047 --> 00:09:49,046 - Stop trying to change me. 219 00:09:49,048 --> 00:09:51,066 I'm iconic. I always have been. 220 00:09:52,044 --> 00:09:54,048 Right? - Quite right, sir. 221 00:09:54,050 --> 00:09:56,050 - I'll take one of those. 222 00:09:56,052 --> 00:10:00,050 Ugh. Never mind. 223 00:10:00,052 --> 00:10:02,047 Does he have Gorgensteins? 224 00:10:02,049 --> 00:10:04,052 - Everyone, everyone, gather round. 225 00:10:04,054 --> 00:10:07,047 As you all know, my two favorite girls 226 00:10:07,049 --> 00:10:10,047 put together this brilliant event for Gorgensteins. 227 00:10:10,049 --> 00:10:13,048 Mummy, you're always talking about charity. 228 00:10:13,050 --> 00:10:16,044 Why, I remember you mentioning it the first time we met. 229 00:10:16,046 --> 00:10:19,063 I was seven, I believe, and you looked at me and said, 230 00:10:19,065 --> 00:10:22,052 "Who is this charity case?" 231 00:10:22,054 --> 00:10:25,054 So inspiring. Now to the main event. 232 00:10:25,056 --> 00:10:27,055 Camilla has a little speech prepared 233 00:10:27,057 --> 00:10:30,058 that's going to knock your socks off. 234 00:10:30,060 --> 00:10:33,044 Come on, darling. You can do it. 235 00:10:33,046 --> 00:10:35,054 Sugar cube? 236 00:10:35,056 --> 00:10:38,048 There we go. 237 00:10:38,050 --> 00:10:40,057 [microphone feedback whining] 238 00:10:44,047 --> 00:10:45,052 [thunder crashes] 239 00:10:45,054 --> 00:10:47,064 [all exclaiming] 240 00:10:47,066 --> 00:10:49,062 - [groans] 241 00:10:49,064 --> 00:10:52,061 [dramatic music] 242 00:10:52,063 --> 00:10:56,058 ♪ ♪ 243 00:10:59,061 --> 00:11:03,059 - Now that we're finally alone, William, we need to talk. 244 00:11:03,061 --> 00:11:06,043 - About what? - Us. 245 00:11:06,045 --> 00:11:08,045 I'm not sure if you don't care about me 246 00:11:08,047 --> 00:11:10,060 or if it's that you don't care about anything at all. 247 00:11:10,062 --> 00:11:12,043 - That's not fair. 248 00:11:12,045 --> 00:11:13,054 - I don't know when you stopped trying, 249 00:11:13,056 --> 00:11:15,059 but it's like you're on autopilot. 250 00:11:15,061 --> 00:11:17,066 - That's not fair. - See? 251 00:11:18,044 --> 00:11:21,062 I can't take it any longer! 252 00:11:21,064 --> 00:11:24,044 Smash a vase. 253 00:11:24,046 --> 00:11:25,063 - You're being unreasonable. 254 00:11:25,065 --> 00:11:27,056 Stomp your foot. 255 00:11:27,058 --> 00:11:31,044 - And I'm trapped in monotony. 256 00:11:31,046 --> 00:11:34,050 Charity event today, an award ceremony tomorrow. 257 00:11:34,052 --> 00:11:37,062 Fund-raisers, dinners, over and over and over. 258 00:11:37,064 --> 00:11:40,048 I can't live like this. 259 00:11:40,050 --> 00:11:43,061 I married you because I loved you, 260 00:11:43,063 --> 00:11:48,055 and now I'm not sure I love anything at all. 261 00:11:48,057 --> 00:11:50,063 I'm unhappy, William. 262 00:11:50,065 --> 00:11:52,048 - Who isn't? 263 00:11:52,050 --> 00:11:53,052 - Scream. 264 00:11:53,054 --> 00:11:55,049 - [shrieking] 265 00:11:55,051 --> 00:11:57,057 - Get ahold of yourself. 266 00:11:57,059 --> 00:12:00,047 [gasps] How dare you. 267 00:12:00,049 --> 00:12:03,055 I'll sleep in the guest palace tonight. 268 00:12:03,057 --> 00:12:05,051 Slam the door behind me. 269 00:12:06,065 --> 00:12:09,046 - Shall I cry, Ma'am? - Oh, no, thank you. 270 00:12:09,048 --> 00:12:11,058 I'll do it myself. 271 00:12:11,060 --> 00:12:14,051 [door opens and shuts] 272 00:12:14,053 --> 00:12:16,066 [crying] 273 00:12:18,064 --> 00:12:20,066 [thunder crashes] 274 00:12:23,043 --> 00:12:27,055 I have got to get out of here. 275 00:12:27,057 --> 00:12:30,057 [dramatic orchestral music] 276 00:12:30,059 --> 00:12:37,062 ♪ ♪