1 00:00:13,057 --> 00:00:20,059 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:25,053 --> 00:00:32,055 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:46,064 --> 00:00:49,053 - Afternoon tea service in one minute! 4 00:00:49,055 --> 00:00:52,063 Afternoon tea service in 55 seconds! 5 00:00:52,065 --> 00:00:54,045 Leave him! 6 00:00:55,057 --> 00:00:57,052 45 seconds. 7 00:00:57,054 --> 00:01:00,062 - Hey, who do I talk to if I need Thursday off? 8 00:01:03,065 --> 00:01:10,053 ♪ ♪ 9 00:01:10,055 --> 00:01:11,058 - Lovely. 10 00:01:11,060 --> 00:01:14,064 Everything looks absolutely scrummy. 11 00:01:14,066 --> 00:01:15,066 - Yum, yum, 12 00:01:16,044 --> 00:01:17,064 I fucking love tea. 13 00:01:17,066 --> 00:01:18,065 - Can I feed Camilla 14 00:01:19,043 --> 00:01:19,066 a sugar cube? 15 00:01:20,044 --> 00:01:21,054 - Just one. 16 00:01:22,064 --> 00:01:24,048 - Oh, she took it! 17 00:01:24,050 --> 00:01:26,043 - She's a good girl. 18 00:01:26,045 --> 00:01:27,051 - Would you pour a little bit of tea 19 00:01:27,053 --> 00:01:28,061 down Prince Philip's throat? 20 00:01:28,063 --> 00:01:30,057 - With pleasure, Your Royal Highness. 21 00:01:32,053 --> 00:01:34,047 It's, uh... 22 00:01:34,049 --> 00:01:35,055 closed, ma'am. 23 00:01:35,057 --> 00:01:37,051 - Here, let me give it a try. 24 00:01:37,053 --> 00:01:38,063 Sometimes it sticks. 25 00:01:38,065 --> 00:01:40,049 All right, grandpa. 26 00:01:40,051 --> 00:01:43,044 Let's open your mouth for William. 27 00:01:45,052 --> 00:01:48,051 It's really stuck this time. 28 00:01:48,053 --> 00:01:50,045 - Is it like opening a jar? 29 00:01:50,047 --> 00:01:52,053 Maybe run it under hot water? 30 00:01:52,055 --> 00:01:55,048 Why am I even participating in this? 31 00:01:55,050 --> 00:01:59,044 - Oh, neat, Demi Lovato is nonbinary. 32 00:01:59,046 --> 00:02:01,045 Hm, good for them. 33 00:02:01,047 --> 00:02:03,047 Oh, look, you got it open. 34 00:02:03,049 --> 00:02:05,050 - There. Good as new. 35 00:02:05,052 --> 00:02:07,064 - I would like a treat! I would like a treat! 36 00:02:07,066 --> 00:02:09,056 The Queen would like a treat! 37 00:02:09,058 --> 00:02:12,053 - Ooh, Mummy, look at all the yummy, yummy yummies! 38 00:02:12,055 --> 00:02:14,051 Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy. 39 00:02:14,053 --> 00:02:16,052 Yummy, Mummy, Mummy, Mummy, Mummy. 40 00:02:16,054 --> 00:02:18,047 - You sound like a fucking idiot. 41 00:02:18,049 --> 00:02:20,061 That's why you're not King, in case you're wondering. 42 00:02:20,063 --> 00:02:22,050 - Sorry, I got caught up. 43 00:02:22,052 --> 00:02:24,048 - A selection of all your favorites, ma'am. 44 00:02:24,050 --> 00:02:26,044 - Where's the flummery tart? 45 00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:28,051 Where's the flummery tart? 46 00:02:28,053 --> 00:02:29,057 I don't see it! 47 00:02:29,059 --> 00:02:32,063 I don't--oh! There it is. 48 00:02:32,065 --> 00:02:34,059 I'll have that. 49 00:02:34,061 --> 00:02:35,059 - Very good, ma'am. 50 00:02:35,061 --> 00:02:36,061 - Gimme, gimme! 51 00:02:36,063 --> 00:02:38,052 Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, 52 00:02:38,054 --> 00:02:41,046 nom, nom, nom, nom, nom. 53 00:02:41,048 --> 00:02:42,065 - So I went online to see what was new 54 00:02:43,043 --> 00:02:44,059 with Uncle Harry and Auntie Meghan 55 00:02:44,061 --> 00:02:46,059 and I couldn't find a thing. 56 00:02:46,061 --> 00:02:48,046 Isn't that odd? 57 00:02:48,048 --> 00:02:49,059 I would've thought she'd have at least popped up 58 00:02:49,061 --> 00:02:52,045 in a tampon commercial by now. 59 00:02:52,064 --> 00:02:55,053 - Excuse me. 60 00:02:55,055 --> 00:02:56,058 - You're fired. 61 00:02:56,060 --> 00:02:58,049 - Sorry? - You heard me. 62 00:02:58,051 --> 00:03:01,043 I won't tolerate your constant coughing and hacking. 63 00:03:01,045 --> 00:03:03,052 - Oh, Mummy, don't. I love that one. 64 00:03:03,054 --> 00:03:05,061 - You are so weak, Charles. 65 00:03:05,063 --> 00:03:07,053 Like this fucking tea. 66 00:03:07,055 --> 00:03:08,066 Get him out of here. 67 00:03:09,044 --> 00:03:11,058 - Oof. - Bye, Felicia. 68 00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:13,045 From this day forward, 69 00:03:13,047 --> 00:03:15,047 you will be in charge of the tea service. 70 00:03:15,049 --> 00:03:17,055 - I don't know what to say, ma'am. 71 00:03:17,057 --> 00:03:18,057 I'm honored. 72 00:03:18,059 --> 00:03:19,057 - And I want you to know 73 00:03:19,059 --> 00:03:21,049 that I'm super easy 74 00:03:21,051 --> 00:03:23,050 and just have fun with it. 75 00:03:23,052 --> 00:03:25,057 - Oy! Tea! 76 00:03:25,059 --> 00:03:28,047 Mmm. 77 00:03:28,049 --> 00:03:30,053 Thank you. 78 00:03:30,055 --> 00:03:33,046 - Okay, that kid freaks me out. 79 00:03:33,048 --> 00:03:34,052 - Okay, slow down. 80 00:03:34,054 --> 00:03:36,046 What exactly did she say to you again? 81 00:03:36,048 --> 00:03:37,047 - A promotion! 82 00:03:37,049 --> 00:03:39,050 She gave me a promotion, Greg! 83 00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,066 Oh, I didn't think things could possibly get 84 00:03:41,044 --> 00:03:42,058 any better after our wedding. 85 00:03:42,060 --> 00:03:44,054 With the extra money, 86 00:03:44,056 --> 00:03:46,057 we could start saving for a surrogate! 87 00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:47,062 - Nothing would make me happier 88 00:03:47,064 --> 00:03:49,045 than for us to raise a baby 89 00:03:49,047 --> 00:03:50,050 in this drawer. 90 00:03:50,052 --> 00:03:53,047 - That dresser has two drawers. 91 00:03:53,049 --> 00:03:54,066 - Twins! Could you imagine? 92 00:03:55,044 --> 00:03:56,050 - I could. 93 00:03:56,052 --> 00:03:58,062 Don't you see? It's all happening for us. 94 00:03:58,064 --> 00:04:01,066 We're going to be one of those couples. 95 00:04:02,044 --> 00:04:03,065 It's just... - What? 96 00:04:04,043 --> 00:04:06,054 - Tea service is a lot. 97 00:04:06,056 --> 00:04:08,055 Do you really think I'm up to it? 98 00:04:08,057 --> 00:04:10,055 - You listen to me, Douglas Mitchell Thorpe. 99 00:04:10,057 --> 00:04:12,045 I knew when I met you that first day 100 00:04:12,047 --> 00:04:13,056 changing Prince Philip's diaper 101 00:04:13,058 --> 00:04:16,049 that you were destined for even greater things. 102 00:04:16,051 --> 00:04:20,046 - That was already more than I had ever dreamt for myself. 103 00:04:20,048 --> 00:04:22,060 But I've learned to dream bigger. 104 00:04:22,062 --> 00:04:23,061 Thanks to you. 105 00:04:23,063 --> 00:04:25,051 - I believe in you. 106 00:04:25,053 --> 00:04:28,046 Just make sure she has that fucking tart. 107 00:04:29,063 --> 00:04:31,047 - Mwah. 108 00:04:36,059 --> 00:04:38,054 Do you feel rested? 109 00:04:38,056 --> 00:04:39,059 - Not really. 110 00:04:41,050 --> 00:04:43,061 - Hey, Harry, I'm gonna-- 111 00:04:45,066 --> 00:04:47,048 Okay, what are you doing? 112 00:04:47,050 --> 00:04:48,059 - Hanging out. 113 00:04:48,061 --> 00:04:50,049 You know, relaxing. 114 00:04:50,051 --> 00:04:51,063 - Um, okay. 115 00:04:51,065 --> 00:04:54,052 It looks like you're standing kind of rigid and formal. 116 00:04:54,054 --> 00:04:55,059 Not at all relaxed. 117 00:04:55,061 --> 00:04:57,057 - Really? No. 118 00:04:57,059 --> 00:04:59,048 Opposite, actually. 119 00:04:59,050 --> 00:05:01,059 - Jesus. What did they do to you? 120 00:05:01,061 --> 00:05:03,052 Anyway, would you mind looking after Archie? 121 00:05:03,054 --> 00:05:05,058 I have an audition. - Is it for Martin Scorsese? 122 00:05:05,060 --> 00:05:07,051 - It's for "Last Man Standing," 123 00:05:07,053 --> 00:05:09,048 but my agent said it could be recurring. 124 00:05:09,050 --> 00:05:10,052 - I'm sure it's wonderful, darling, 125 00:05:10,054 --> 00:05:12,047 and only sounds shitty. 126 00:05:12,049 --> 00:05:14,048 - Yeah, thanks. 127 00:05:14,050 --> 00:05:15,065 Okay, see you later. 128 00:05:16,043 --> 00:05:18,056 Oh, would you pick up some milk? 129 00:05:21,050 --> 00:05:24,052 - Everybody, may I have your attention? 130 00:05:27,063 --> 00:05:30,062 I said, may I have your attention? 131 00:05:32,043 --> 00:05:35,060 We are about to begin tea service. 132 00:05:35,062 --> 00:05:37,056 I know some of you are anxious, 133 00:05:37,058 --> 00:05:39,049 some of you are frightened, 134 00:05:39,051 --> 00:05:40,063 but know this. 135 00:05:40,065 --> 00:05:43,057 We do this for our Queen! 136 00:05:43,059 --> 00:05:45,046 It will be difficult, 137 00:05:45,048 --> 00:05:46,065 some of us will fall. 138 00:05:47,043 --> 00:05:49,065 But together, we will succeed! 139 00:05:50,043 --> 00:05:52,045 We will give them biscuits. 140 00:05:52,047 --> 00:05:54,051 We will give them tea! 141 00:05:54,053 --> 00:05:57,047 We will give them scones, 142 00:05:57,049 --> 00:05:59,065 or we will die trying. 143 00:06:00,043 --> 00:06:03,049 For he today that sheds his blood with me 144 00:06:03,051 --> 00:06:06,045 shall be my brother! 145 00:06:09,054 --> 00:06:11,064 - Brava! Brava! 146 00:06:11,066 --> 00:06:13,053 - Edmond? 147 00:06:13,055 --> 00:06:15,063 Bring the flummery tarts! 148 00:06:15,065 --> 00:06:17,061 - Right away. 149 00:06:17,063 --> 00:06:20,050 - Now does anybody have a question? 150 00:06:20,052 --> 00:06:23,058 - Yeah, who do I talk to if I need Thursday off? 151 00:06:28,044 --> 00:06:30,051 - Back! Back, I say! 152 00:06:31,054 --> 00:06:33,049 The tarts. 153 00:06:35,048 --> 00:06:37,050 Cheers. Thanks, mate. 154 00:06:43,046 --> 00:06:45,048 - Can nobody fix that? 155 00:06:46,056 --> 00:06:48,053 - I think the hinge is broken. 156 00:06:48,055 --> 00:06:49,054 - Just leave it. 157 00:06:49,056 --> 00:06:50,055 It's easier to put stuff 158 00:06:50,057 --> 00:06:52,061 in that way. 159 00:06:52,063 --> 00:06:53,066 See? 160 00:06:54,044 --> 00:06:55,057 Happy as a clam! 161 00:06:56,066 --> 00:06:59,058 - I told you, I'll call when it's safe. 162 00:06:59,060 --> 00:07:02,066 - Wait. What's going on with you? 163 00:07:03,044 --> 00:07:04,051 - George is pretty! 164 00:07:04,053 --> 00:07:07,044 - Oh, my God, thank you! 165 00:07:07,046 --> 00:07:08,057 - Camilla, you should ask Mummy 166 00:07:08,059 --> 00:07:10,065 if she wants to do Pilates with you. 167 00:07:11,043 --> 00:07:13,049 Yes, she would adore it! 168 00:07:13,051 --> 00:07:14,063 Mummy, Camilla's desperate 169 00:07:14,065 --> 00:07:17,043 for you to do Pilates with her. 170 00:07:17,045 --> 00:07:19,051 - You know when I'm available, Camilla? 171 00:07:19,053 --> 00:07:21,065 When fucking hell freezes over. 172 00:07:22,043 --> 00:07:24,058 How dare she say I need Pilates! 173 00:07:24,060 --> 00:07:27,057 - She's gonna think about it and get back to you, darling. 174 00:07:27,059 --> 00:07:29,063 - Flummery tart, ma'am. 175 00:07:30,063 --> 00:07:33,046 - Puh! I don't like this. 176 00:07:33,048 --> 00:07:34,056 - But... 177 00:07:34,058 --> 00:07:37,052 it's been your favorite for 90 years. 178 00:07:37,054 --> 00:07:39,057 - Yeah, and I just got sick of it. 179 00:07:39,059 --> 00:07:41,044 Now take it away! 180 00:07:41,046 --> 00:07:42,066 I never want to see it again! 181 00:07:43,044 --> 00:07:44,051 - Of course, ma'am. 182 00:07:44,053 --> 00:07:45,064 Ah, fuck. 183 00:07:45,066 --> 00:07:47,056 - If I ever see that tart again, 184 00:07:47,058 --> 00:07:48,064 you piece of shit, 185 00:07:48,066 --> 00:07:49,065 you will be serving tea 186 00:07:50,043 --> 00:07:51,053 out of your severed head. 187 00:07:51,055 --> 00:07:52,059 Do you understand me? 188 00:07:52,061 --> 00:07:55,051 - Yes, of course, ma'am. Apologies. 189 00:07:56,054 --> 00:07:58,066 - I think he's doing a rather good job. 190 00:07:59,044 --> 00:08:00,063 - Yes, bang on. 191 00:08:05,053 --> 00:08:06,065 - Excuse me, milk? 192 00:08:07,043 --> 00:08:08,058 - Fuck off. - Right. 193 00:08:08,060 --> 00:08:10,043 Okay, Arby. 194 00:08:10,045 --> 00:08:12,056 Milk? - Go to hell, asshole. 195 00:08:12,058 --> 00:08:14,044 Aww, cute baby. 196 00:08:14,046 --> 00:08:15,064 - Thanks! 197 00:08:15,066 --> 00:08:22,043 ♪ ♪ 198 00:08:22,045 --> 00:08:25,059 Milk? 199 00:08:25,061 --> 00:08:27,058 - End of aisle one. 200 00:08:27,060 --> 00:08:30,049 - For your kindness, sir. 201 00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:32,043 - Um... okay. 202 00:08:32,045 --> 00:08:34,061 - What'd he give you? - Get away, it's mine! 203 00:08:36,047 --> 00:08:37,050 - Fuck me. 204 00:08:37,052 --> 00:08:40,065 The whole aisle is a refrigerator! 205 00:08:41,061 --> 00:08:45,045 - So today it went, you know... 206 00:08:45,047 --> 00:08:46,045 okay. 207 00:08:46,047 --> 00:08:47,058 - I think you did fabulous. 208 00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:49,058 Doesn't everyone think Douglas did fabulous? 209 00:08:49,060 --> 00:08:51,047 - Don't. 210 00:08:51,049 --> 00:08:54,053 Now, first order of business, the flummery tart. 211 00:08:54,055 --> 00:08:56,061 We don't need them. Ever again. 212 00:08:56,063 --> 00:08:59,048 She went off. 213 00:08:59,050 --> 00:09:02,053 - So what do we do about those things down there, then? 214 00:09:02,055 --> 00:09:05,049 - Yeah. 215 00:09:05,051 --> 00:09:07,066 Somebody needs to take care of that whole... 216 00:09:08,044 --> 00:09:09,054 "situation." 217 00:09:09,056 --> 00:09:12,050 So I'll leave that to... 218 00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:13,063 somebody. 219 00:09:15,056 --> 00:09:16,060 Any other thoughts? 220 00:09:16,062 --> 00:09:18,056 - Reminder, I'm not here Thursday. 221 00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:19,061 - I know! 222 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:23,053 - Hi, Kate, it's Meghan. I was just wondering 223 00:09:23,055 --> 00:09:25,047 if you've heard from Harry? 224 00:09:25,049 --> 00:09:26,052 - Meghan? 225 00:09:26,054 --> 00:09:30,046 - Meghan Markle, your sister-in-law. 226 00:09:30,048 --> 00:09:31,052 Oh, never mind, he's here. 227 00:09:31,054 --> 00:09:32,066 - Wonderful, darling. 228 00:09:33,044 --> 00:09:35,045 - Who is that? - Meghan. 229 00:09:35,047 --> 00:09:37,063 Some tosser gave her our number. 230 00:09:37,065 --> 00:09:40,045 Oh, shit! 231 00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:41,058 - Don't miss her. 232 00:09:41,060 --> 00:09:42,066 Where have you been? 233 00:09:43,044 --> 00:09:44,065 - The most incredible thing happened. 234 00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:46,058 I found this place-- you're not gonna believe it. 235 00:09:46,060 --> 00:09:49,048 Stacks and stacks of food as far as the eye could see, 236 00:09:49,050 --> 00:09:51,061 and people just roaming the corridors taking it! 237 00:09:51,063 --> 00:09:54,043 - Mm-hmm. - So how was your audition? 238 00:09:54,045 --> 00:09:56,050 - The show was canceled by the time I got there. 239 00:09:56,052 --> 00:09:57,055 - Well, we don't need you to work anyway 240 00:09:57,057 --> 00:09:59,056 because I'm able to find this! 241 00:09:59,058 --> 00:10:01,048 Game on, America! 242 00:10:01,050 --> 00:10:04,052 - Okay, well, you don't get paid for that, but... 243 00:10:04,054 --> 00:10:05,064 I'm super happy for you. 244 00:10:05,066 --> 00:10:07,059 You're figuring things out. 245 00:10:07,061 --> 00:10:09,061 I guess. What happened to your ring? 246 00:10:09,063 --> 00:10:11,046 - I gave it to the working people. 247 00:10:11,048 --> 00:10:13,046 - We're the working people! 248 00:10:13,048 --> 00:10:16,056 I'm sorry, I just-- 249 00:10:16,058 --> 00:10:18,061 I need a drink. 250 00:10:21,051 --> 00:10:22,059 - I don't know about this. 251 00:10:22,061 --> 00:10:24,054 - It's like getting rid of mice. 252 00:10:24,056 --> 00:10:27,053 - Okay. Right, that makes sense. 253 00:10:27,055 --> 00:10:29,061 Mice. They're like mice. 254 00:10:29,063 --> 00:10:31,053 - It's very humane. 255 00:10:31,055 --> 00:10:33,066 - Good, good. 256 00:10:39,058 --> 00:10:41,044 Holy shit! 257 00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:48,056 ♪ ♪ 258 00:10:48,058 --> 00:10:50,053 - Ah, that's done. 259 00:10:50,055 --> 00:10:54,062 So what are the big plans for Thursday? 260 00:10:57,063 --> 00:11:04,047 ♪ ♪ 261 00:11:05,050 --> 00:11:07,059 - Ugh, people keep sending me stuff. 262 00:11:07,061 --> 00:11:10,052 It's literally never-ending. 263 00:11:10,054 --> 00:11:12,043 Hey, do you want a jar of La Mer? 264 00:11:12,045 --> 00:11:14,044 - I would love a jar-- - I'm kidding. 265 00:11:14,046 --> 00:11:16,045 These are, like, 500 pounds. 266 00:11:16,047 --> 00:11:18,053 Okay, let's go over my day tomorrow. 267 00:11:18,055 --> 00:11:22,045 - You have school and nap and snack, Your Royal Highness. 268 00:11:22,047 --> 00:11:24,064 - Okay, I'll need reminder texts for all of those. 269 00:11:24,066 --> 00:11:27,065 Really good job lately, O, you've been crushing it. 270 00:11:28,043 --> 00:11:30,048 - And you have a playdate later this week, sir. 271 00:11:30,050 --> 00:11:32,061 - Why am I just hearing about this now? 272 00:11:32,063 --> 00:11:34,065 - It's been on your schedule for weeks, sir. 273 00:11:35,043 --> 00:11:36,062 - I'm not in the mood for one of your excuses, 274 00:11:36,064 --> 00:11:37,065 so spare me. 275 00:11:40,047 --> 00:11:41,053 First, we'll need a theme. 276 00:11:41,055 --> 00:11:42,062 Start thinking Truman Capote's 277 00:11:42,064 --> 00:11:44,064 Black and White Ball and--oh, here I am 278 00:11:44,066 --> 00:11:47,046 doing all the work again, big surprise. 279 00:11:47,048 --> 00:11:49,053 And I want the guest list kept very exclusive. 280 00:11:49,055 --> 00:11:51,058 Do you understand me? - Of course. 281 00:11:51,060 --> 00:11:54,060 - If Charlotte shows up, so help me, God. 282 00:11:54,062 --> 00:11:55,062 You know what? 283 00:11:55,064 --> 00:11:57,052 This is gonna be fun, O! 284 00:11:57,054 --> 00:11:58,062 - I have no doubt with you hosting, 285 00:11:58,064 --> 00:12:01,047 it will be the party of the decade, sir. 286 00:12:01,049 --> 00:12:02,066 - Aw, thanks, Owen. 287 00:12:03,044 --> 00:12:05,044 I feel bad about before now. 288 00:12:05,046 --> 00:12:07,064 You can have that jar of La Mer if you want. 289 00:12:07,066 --> 00:12:11,047 The one that's cracked in half, not the good one. 290 00:12:14,050 --> 00:12:20,066 ♪ ♪ 291 00:12:26,062 --> 00:12:33,065 ♪ ♪