Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull
In this short video,
we'll cover the seven basics of cabling.
Sorry, I never know how to get this thing on.
But first, a little bit of history.
It's been said that you can't appreciate the present,
without understanding the past,
and that means appreciating just how far we've come.
In the early days of the stock exchange, for example,
the world ran at the speed of telegrams.
It's a wonder anything got done.
The development of the internet in the 1990's
changed the pace of our markets forever.
Trades could now move at hyper-speed,
along one of these,
a bundle of fiber optic cables,
transmitting signals across the Atlantic
in mere milliseconds.
But thanks to dramatic advances in recent years,
the next era of financial growth is upon us,
and with it, the next era of human potential.
Welcome to the unlimited possibilities of the Quantum.
Niacin time buddy, you ready?
Let's try and sit you up.
You all right?
Yeah, yeah I'm all right.
You want to give this stuff a shot?
It's supposed to give you nice little rush of energy,
but it might make you feel a little flush,
but if you take it every day
that'll go away after a few days.
Wait, what day is today?
Thursday.
Hey, officer?
Excuse me, officer?
Hey, sorry to bother you.
It's alternate side parking today, right?
No, it is not, sir, Shavuot.
But that's what the calendar says,
and it definitely says nothing about there being a holiday.
Where's your calendar from?
It's from the website, from the dot gov,
it's the official calendar.
You usin' a Quantum or a standard system to access it.
A Quantum is standard?
Do you own a Quantum computer?
No, I don't.
Well, that's why it's wrong.
Well why would it be different?
I mean the calendar's the calendar.
Nope, everything the city does now is Quantum.
You gotta have a Quantum system
to access the latest calendar.
If you're using a standard system,
then it's most likely still accessing
last year's alternate side holiday calendar.
And the Jewish holidays change every year
because they operate with the moon.
Operate with the moon?
How am I supposed to know this?
What, everyone has a Quantum computer?
You see any cars double-parked?
There have been emails, PSA's, mailers.
You haven't seen the mailers?
Yeah yeah, I seen 'em.
All right, sorry.
Mm-hmm.
What?
Got a frickin' ticket.
The damn calendar,
the alternate side parking calendar is wrong.
I went up to this cop, she told me it's wrong,
and I turn around, boom.
And I still gotta find another parking spot.
The calendar is wrong.
Inaccurate, it's wrong.
What did the cop say?
Yeah, so I go up to her and I said,
"It's wrong on the website."
And she says, "Okay, what kind of computer do you have?"
You need to have a...
- Quantum, yes? - Yeah.
No, I'm not bringing any of that Quantum
fiber-optic, wifi shit, into this house, okay?
I'm not risking it, I don't trust any of it.
And back on Quanta,
now Jeff I want to dive deeper into determinacy,
and how you image it's affected high speed trading.
Look, basically high speed trading
was the kindergarten version of Wall Street.
So once Quantum computers became market ready,
what you've seen is just this rush of activity,
this rush of interest in Quantum,
for markets, for traders.
Should be a big load,
everyone's back from spring break.
Hey, do you have one of those Quantum computers?
A what?
Everyone keeps telling me I need
one of these new kind of computers,
called a Quantum computer.
Yeah, you do.
Hey, how's everything with the airline?
Everything okay?
They poke around once in a while.
I hear about it, nothing to worry about.
Some of the bags get through,
some take a little longer.
Listen did you get a chance to think about the position
since we last talked?
Yeah, I'm not gonna take it.
Ray, it's a promotion.
I know but I gotta keep things flexible right now,
the deliveries are better for me.
What's a single guy like you got to worry about?
I'm taking care of my brother.
He's got omnia.
Isn't that the thing that's all made up?
Ray, this could all be yours.
Thanks, I'm good.
All right, James,
got a new member of the family.
Phonic sevens.
Is this used?
Yeah, lightly used.
I gotta lay down.
Yeah, you know, come on, we'll set it up later.
With Quantum cabling, we're actually seeing
more medallions active than ever before.
If you look across all regions.
Forget about the clinic.
What?
Hey, listen,
if there are people with omnia going to that clinic,
you're going to that clinic.
Okay, I don't care how much it costs.
If they can pay for it, we're gonna pay for it.
All right, tell me this.
How do you see cabling today?
I see it as a way for people to get out of cities,
to find something that engages their minds.
Hey, what was that thing that Felix was doing?
What was it, laying Quantum cable, or what was that?
Didn't he make a fortune?
Do not do anything with Felix.
No, no no, I know, I won't.
I was just askin'.
All right, I won't.
The thing is, you hear 'em saying
it's boomin' and everything.
But actually, in the northeast right now,
cabling medallions are harder to get than ever.
There's wait lists, takes months.
But see, I got a little workaround.
A workaround?
Yeah, I got my buddy Dee over in the Interior Department.
He does all the permitting for the cabling companies
when they come into national parks.
The way I got it set up with cabler,
the main company, basically, I can get you a medallion.
I can get you a medallion, okay?
And in return, myself and two chicks
I've got handling things on the ground,
we take a piece of the action and
basically a cut comes out your earnings
when you're out there.
So consider it.
A lotta money to be made cabling.
Oh yeah?
Yeah yeah, and we like to train people in twos.
Saves us all some time so,
think who you might want to bring with you.
Maybe you get Jamie out there.
Oh well he's pretty sick actually,
so I don't think he could do it but,
but thanks Felix, I appreciate
any introduction that you could get me.
Of course, but listen, if all goes well,
I bet we could bring you in on my operation if you want it.
Sign people up, end up with a share.
Passive income.
Well thanks yeah,
I think I just want to keep things clean right now,
but I really appreciate it.
Yeah, you know speaking of which,
how's the lost luggage business treating you?
Well, they idea is to quit that
as soon as I get something else that works.
Yeah, I understand.
Look,
take this.
Information on how it works.
Transistors like this one,
which are optimally located
in between major market centers around the world,
require constant rewiring around the clock
to create new routes.
With each new connection affecting the market
in a small way.
Cablers like Jenn have been turning that need
into a lucrative weekend job,
ever since Quantum cabling companies
began allowing anyone to apply for a cabling medallion.
With a low barrier entry,
all it seems it takes to make it big in cabling,
is a can-do attitude, and a love of the outdoors.
Yeah, in the work that I do out here,
just in the past year I was able to pay off my mortgage,
get out of debt, it's been a lifesaver.
Plus, I love to hike so.
But recently, some of the top cabling companies,
like HEX and CBLR,
have come under fire for a range of new policies,
related to the introduction of automation
into cabling zones.
We believe that if this work is going to be automated,
cablers need to have health insurance, for independent...
Why am I looking at this?
Look, people make like thousands in a weekend.
Okay, so how about I do it for a little while,
I get you in the clinic,
then I'll do it as needed until you get better.
Have you been talking to Felix?
No.
Okay, so say you have to pay for all this gear up front.
What happens when you make it out there
and you can't get up literally a single hill.
Okay, okay, all right, look,
first, I know I don't look it,
but I'm in really really good shape right now.
Number two, before I do it,
I'm gonna give it a shot first.
Give it what shot?
I'm gonna do dry run right here in Queens.
And you can come, and you can get some fresh air.
And I'll prove it to you, and you can give me some tips.
- You're the pro. - Tips?
Hiking tips.
Where am I gonna give you hiking tips in Queens?
Hey, take a minute.
That's fine, take a minute.
Fresh air's good.
Hey, fresh air's good.
You can't cable.
Huh, don't worry about me.
I'm all right.
I'm fine.
Hey, two birds right, listen,
I've been thinking about it,
and I'm interested in the promotion.
I'd like to talk it out with you, tomorrow.
I want to take back what I said,
I'd love to take it to the next step
if it's still available.
So, give me a call or I'll stop by
tomorrow in the a.m. all right?
I'll see you then.
I'm just a smalltime business owner, that's it.
I mean.
Come on buddy, we gotta roll.
Did you take the manager job?
Yeah yeah, we're in business.
Welcome to the Barr-Crider Clinic,
the world leader in recovery from
the chronic fatigue disorder known as omnia.
Our hope is...
James Tintelli?
That's us buddy, we're up.
This is your room right here.
Feel free to relax, and someone will be back at 11:30
to bring you down to the dining hall for lunch.
Hey, hey,
let me see that band.
There he is.
Hey,
I want you to call me if you need anything, okay?
Raymond, will you be visiting us during James' stay?
Not the first few days, I'm away this weekend,
but after that, yeah.
Do you have a credit card we can run?
How much you putting on it, right now?
10,000 as an authorized hold
till we charge at the end of the week.
Is that okay?
- Friday? - Yes.
Yeah, sounds great.
Here is your card,
and some information on downloading our apps,
so you can check in on James remotely.
Oh, great.
Thanks.
Hey Ray, good news.
Your cabling medallion's all squared away.
So, my two associates, Erica and Jo
will meet you on their way up.
I'll text you the location.
It'll be somewhere convenient,
so just bring enough to camp for one weekend to start,
see how you do.
So good luck.
Erica?
Hey, I'm Ray.
Hey so you guys work for Felix?
Yeah, yeah, Felix knows everyone he's
a real savvy guy.
Hey, so you guys are already set up
with a company and a medallion,
so just take a look around,
and then they're gonna make an announcement,
and you'll go straight back to the screening room,
watch your training video.
When you complete it, they'll give you a bracelet.
And then you can just meet in front of the CBLR booth.
Group three, proceed to the screening room.
With the introduction of Quantum computing
to financial markets around the world,
comes a unique new industry
that offers well-paying jobs and a breath of fresh air.
But how does it all work?
This short tutorial will tell you all you need to know
to start your cabling adventure.
Cabler users are the engines
of the global Quantum trading boom.
Each user works with a basic setup,
a cabling cart equipped with a cable monitor,
and a handheld GPS unit.
Cabling is easy.
First, users open the app on their smartphone
to sync with their GPS device.
This allows you to continue cabling,
even if your phone loses service.
Once in a zone,
you'll notice our fleet of automated cabling carts.
These little helpers are your friends,
picking up the slack when routes can't be completed.
And always pushing cablers to set new personal bests.
Remember, the best cablers are the ones
who aren't afraid to challenge their status quo.
All right, that should be enough.
You can take those now.
I got a quick question.
Sorry, I don't know much about cabling,
but I was watching the video and I was wondering like
is it for sure, safe?
Like with all the Quantum stuff,
and the signals and whatever's in the air?
Like I mean is it all good?
Is it like tested?
Totally.
Yeah, no, yeah.
It's totally safe.
I mean, you're outside, you're in nature.
It's actually like, so good for you.
Okay, cool, cool.
So, ready to take the written test?
Everybody passes.
Welcome to 54 Mayberry.
Hey, does she know these people?
No.
So how's she get in the garage?
Store me.
We keep our cabling gear up here
so we don't have to schlepp it back to the city.
So these people just let you in their home?
Yeah, we hook up to their home security system.
We can lock and unlock doors as needed,
mostly to store stuff.
You agree on a price through a bidding system.
It actually works great.
Schrodinger didn't know if his cat
was dead or alive until he looked,
and that's just like what happens in Quantum training.
Every time a route is cabled,
a single photon beam shifts a cubit
inside each terminal,
through a fail safe encryption process known as GEN2 QKD,
short of Quantum Key Distribution.
Hey, do I need to know this stuff?
Like photons and key distribution?
No.
Honestly, I don't know how any of that works.
Each time you successfully complete a route,
our secure payment system...
Welcome to Cablers Allegheny State Park.
Give me a hand here?
How do you get the cable monitor to sync to the GPS device?
If you haven't already,
now is the moment to sync your smartphone
with your GPS device.
Here you go.
Sync complete.
Thanks man.
You all good?
Yeah yeah.
Welcome to cablers Allegheny State Park cabling zone.
Steel Linxette, welcome back.
Freda Orysmus.
Subtle Tweaker, let's start cabling.
Lapsis Beeftech.
Welcome back.
Yeah?
Route selected.
Hey yeah, sorry.
So which route should I pick, here.
Here I'll get you started.
We won't be together for the weekend, right?
Oh no no, we've completed more routes,
so it's gonna give us different ones to start,
like longer, harder terrain.
Yeah, so you guys are gonna get started
with some beginner stuff.
So, yeah.
All right, we're gonna go on our way.
We'll meet you back here, Sunday at five.
This is just short, easy, you got it.
It can be tough in the beginning.
Don't forget to hydrate.
Oh yeah, remember, we take 30% off the top,
which you can work down over time,
but it's based on total profit.
So, better the route, better for you.
Go ahead and grab some cable from the shed,
and you can get started.
You'll be great.
Ready to go.
Hey.
Hey man.
Phil, dude just go.
I'm gonna take a little break here.
Rest tonight.
It'll tell you when you can rest.
Rest tonight.
Rest tonight, rest tonight.
Challenge your status quo.
You're out of cable.
When you run out of cable,
one of our aerial resupply units will find you.
Follow these easy steps to receive a fresh bundle,
action required.
Action required.
Press drop.
What?
Press drop on the action menu.
Action required, action required.
Find the drop.
Time to continue your adventure.
Rest tonight.
Challenge your status quo.
Is this your first time out here?
Yeah, what do I gotta do here?
If this is the end of your route,
you have to check in here first,
so just put your thingy under the lens here.
Hey, there it is.
Lapsis Beeftech.
Hey, thanks.
Route complete.
You've earned 795 dollars.
And you've got the Gen store,
located near site 47.
What you see every day on your desk startup,
here at one of our many transistor sites.
So when you order a new route,
this is where the magic happens.
In between routes our cablers typically stay
at campsites like this one,
but this campsite is actually one of our larger sites,
which is why you can see right behind me is a Gen store,
which is where cablers go to stock up
on food and grab new gear.
Locals in the area actually franchise these Gen stores,
which is just one of many industries
that have grown up out of the Quantum cabling boom
over the past decade.
Anything catch your eye?
Is that lasagna?
Yeah.
Ever been camping before?
Boil water, add it in,
lasagna.
Cash or points?
Cash, I don't have any points.
I gotta scan you first, honey.
Well actually, you do have points, 60,743.
Yeah but this is my first route.
This is your medallion?
Yeah.
Well, these are your points if you want to use 'em.
Yeah,
just, take that.
Here Betty, one time just for me.
All right.
Does it have a name?
Hey Ray, you gettin' by okay out there?
Yeah yeah yeah, all's great, everything's great, Felix.
Listen.
Look, I'm caught up in the middle of a situation.
Okay, I got a quick question for you, all right.
I feel like I'm using somebody else's medallion,
'cause like there's all this personal files on here,
and a couple of people gave me like a weird look
when I said my trail name.
And I went to buy some stuff,
and all these points on the account
that are like clearly not mine.
So like, is this thing legit?
Of course it is, Ray.
Those were obviously not my points.
No, it looks like it's just your lucky day.
If I was you, I'd spend them.
Okay, but why would there be?
Listen, Ray just let me know if you got a problem
look, I've gotta go.
Bye.
You're gonna be fine.
Something cover up.
All right.
Hi.
Sorry, if we were keeping you up.
Important business.
No, of course.
What's going on?
Teddy, he's not gonna bite.
You're a trustworthy guy, right?
No, the situation is, Teddy here,
just got lapped by an automated cart.
So we're helping him get materials,
so he can set a wire trap, so he can reclaim his route.
What's your trail name, I'll add you.
Add me, sorry.
How long you been out here?
This is my second route.
It's my first day.
Yeah, so you're able to see all the cablers out there,
if they're in the same zone,
if you add them on the network.
That way when you're around different people,
you'll pop up.
Gotcha, yeah yeah,
I'm not so good with the tech stuff yet.
So, what's your trail name?
My name is Lapsis Beeftech.
I don't know what to say, it is what it is.
Why'd you choose that name?
I didn't choose it.
Did you get to choose yours?
Yeah, we all did.
Just out of curiosity, when you started,
did you have a lot of points already, or anything?
Yeah, I tried to buy some stuff today,
and I was like, can I use this stuff?
I mean is this kosher?
So I called them, and they said yeah,
if you got the points, use them.
They're yours to use.
So let me get this straight.
You don't know whose trail name that was, before you?
Is that correct?
No, I just started.
My friend started a donation pool
for cablers who are unjustly detained,
or penalized out here,
you know, to help them with their legal fees.
I don't know if you wanted to donate
some of your points, just so you know it's an option.
Oh wow, cool, yeah.
Not saying you have to, of course.
No, totally yeah, but that's, that's great.
Well we are gonna hit the hay.
Look, if you're around tomorrow for breakfast,
we're having flapjacks.
Flapjacks?
What time?
Seven, yeah, you're welcome to join.
Oh great.
You guys have syrup?
Yeah.
You deserve a rest.
The crazy thing about self-driving technology,
is that they can't the lasers to recognize
whether you're driving on sand or snow.
The other side of that is that when you think about
human emotions, flexibility, human nuance,
dogs are incredibly stupid.
That's a high-speed data tower,
pubic wifi, GPS,
I mean who's to say the immune system, right?
Running on tiny little interactions between cells,
all based on magnetic properties of chemistry.
The most advanced AI,
billions of dollars in research,
shopping mall sized server farms
in the middle of the desert.
News flash, your dog is not happy living
in your small apartment.
Alzheimer's, omnia,
how do we know these aren't correlated,
with disturbances to the environment
in which they originally evolved.
My dog can tell the difference between sand and snow.
Why?
Oh because she has a brain,
that's evolved over millions of years,
and instead of respecting that,
and then cautiously moving towards that,
we can just get a bunch of dudes
in a room and crack intelligence.
You're confident those tests can prove
whether or not there's potential harm on biology
we don't even fully understand?
People have to ask themselves
what they really want in life.
Sorry, gotta go.
Action required.
Coming drop.
Sorry man, I gotta go.
Challenge your status quo.
Hello, Mister Tincelli,
this is Doctor Joe Mangold at Barr-Crider Clinic.
Oh hey Doctor Mangold, can you hear me now?
I'm calling because Jamie's doing well,
but not really responding yet
to our more conventional therapies.
So, given his symptom profile,
what I want to recommend to you, Raymond,
is that we upgrade him to track three,
which involves a treatment known as magnesium acoustics.
Uh huh.
Track three does represent a change in the pricing plan
that you had discussed,
but at the higher price point,
you get a more potent plan of action for James.
Oh, yeah yeah yeah,
well doctor this is definitely something
I am interested in,
so how much more are we talking?
Well, you're at 10 right now,
this would come in about 19, weekly.
Gotcha.
Is it actually possible actually
to speak with Jamie at the moment?
I was just in his room, he's fast asleep.
I would hate to have to wake him up.
Okay well, Doctor Mangold, unfortunately,
I'm gonna have to stick to the normal plan,
because it sounds great, but I mean,
it's not something I can.
Mister Tincelli?
Yeah, sorry doctor.
I appreciate the call,
and I'll talk to you again soon.
Bye bye.
DNA detected.
Positive ID match.
DNA detected, positive ID match.
Security dispatch.
Lapsis Beeftech.
Excuse me sir, can I interest you
in a totally new way to see?
No thanks, on my way out.
This is my last route.
Thanks, though.
Well, congratulations, but the next time you're out here,
you are definitely going to want these,
because what they allow you to do,
is to actually see at night,
thanks to a patented PDC technology
which bio-amplifies the route receptors in your eyes,
giving you a 40% boost in the dark,
allowing you to become more stable at night.
Probably at night.
What?
God damn it.
I'm sorry.
Route selected.
Excuse me.
Sir?
Hey buddy, so listen,
I got you on an upgraded plan there,
so do me a favor, give me a call when you get a chance,
let me know how you're doing.
All right, I love you buddy.
We'll get you out of there feelin' better.
All right, let me know.
♪ Lazy river in the noonday sun ♪
♪ Lay for a while in the shade of a tree ♪
♪ Throw away your troubles, dream with me ♪
♪ Up the lazy river where the robin suns ♪
♪ Wait for the morning, we roll along ♪
Quantum selected, two remaining.
Hi, I'm Noori Capahardi, CBLR's new CEO.
Since joining six months ago, I've been listening to you.
To towns and rural communities
near some of our most active zones,
and also to our own employees.
I've seen a lot of good,
in flexible jobs, benefits to local economies,
the pride of being part of a truly
21st century innovation in Quantum computing.
And I know we have a lot to work on.
One of our core values at CBLR
is to always do the right thing.
You've got my promise that we're charting
an even better route for CBLR,
and far those who rely on us
for flexible, sustainable careers, every day.
Well that's some bullshit.
Literally insane.
Yeah, bullshit.
You imagining if they took those shots
out here, like of us,
like shots of Alice crawling her way over Jughead?
Blood dripping down her ear, right?
Must finish route before automated carts.
We're listening to you.
Hey real talk, Miss PR Reboot or whatever
means we get longer routes and can finish 'em,
I'm all ears.
If you saw a route to a 130, you'd actually take it?
Sure, that's gotta start at five grand, minimum.
Take that to the casino, maybe get myself a trailer,
live the Bob life.
Bob has a sweet trailer down behind the casino.
Oh yeah, whereabouts?
Salamanca.
Across the park, over by the 150's.
Oh nice, yeah.
I'm headed up to 167.
Explains the gear.
Ray, I thought you said this was your first week out here?
Yeah, it is.
Well that's the life.
First week, tens of thousands on a route to a 160.
What's your trail name again?
Well I didn't choose
- my trail name. - What's your trail name?
Lapsis Beeftech.
You smug son of a bitch.
Oh hey, come on.
What are you gonna do?
Come on, come on, let him go.
It's not him, it's obviously not him.
Not who?
Never mind man, never mind, just clean up, all right.
You done?
Hey.
Sorry about back there.
It's no problem man.
Can I give you some advice?
Sure.
You don't know who the previous owner
of your medallion was, do you?
No man, I just signed up like everybody else.
Why, do you know whose it was?
Well, a lot of people are running scams.
I'd just make up a new name
and use that when you tell people.
Why?
Well, it's not really worth getting into but.
I don't know why you can't just tell me.
Because I don't know if I can trust you.
I'm just out here workin' like everybody else, man.
All right.
Just use a different trail name.
That's all I'm trying to say.
It's for your own safety.
Hey, how's it going Ray?
Hey, good.
I see you're on a long route.
Uh yeah.
Are you on pace?
Yeah, yeah.
Love it, challenging your status quo.
Keep it up, Ray.
Okay ready, one time just for me.
Who is that?
A little rat.
Does it have a name?
Hey buddy, just callin' again to see how you're doing.
Come on!
You're out of cable.
Out of range.
Signal strength, low.
Auto drop initiated.
Yo.
Yo!
Hey, what are you doin'?
That's mine, what are you doin'?
Hey!
Hey, give me that, drop that.
Jesus Christ.
Hey, what do you want?
- What do you want? - Give it up!
Everything you've got.
Give us a share of your boot,
and you can have your table.
In return, we'll protect you from danger,
and treat you like one of us.
Who the hell are you kids?
Give us your money!
Chets, leave the area right now, and I won't report it.
Hey.
These yours?
Oh yeah yeah.
Thanks, yeah, yeah, I'm Ray.
- Oh. - Thanks again.
Anna.
Or, do you have a trail name?
Who were those lunatics?
Did you see that?
That was insane.
As in, scared me to death.
You new out here?
Yeah yeah, I'm pretty new, yeah.
They live down by the town, in RV camps,
but they're harmless if you just threaten to report them.
They've been on you for a couple of days now, I think.
Wait a minute, harmless?
I mean they jumped out of nowhere
and they threw a net on me.
I almost had a heart attack.
Well, their parents are poor seasonal laborers,
who were exploited by companies
that don't provide day care to independent contractors,
so it depends how you look at it.
What did you mean by, "they were on me?"
What does that mean, I don't understand,
and why do you know that?
Well, I've been slightly behind you each day
because your pace is aggressive,
but then if I'm not wrong,
at the end of each day
we've been ending up at the same campsites.
Right, okay.
I think that's you.
Oh yeah, oh, probably yeah.
My rig is back that way down the path,
but I'm headed that direction.
Oh all right, so I'll
wait over there for you.
Okay.
I do this six months out of the year.
I think this is my fifth year,
and then the rest of the year
I get to do my own thing, whatever I want.
Whatever you want.
Pretty cool, like what?
You deserve a rest.
Deserve a rest.
"In conversations about the inequalities
"of the Quantum market,
"the focus is usually on
"the outrageous returns to Wall Street,
"but in cabling zones across the country,
"a handful of companies are making money hand over fist,
"while the independent contractors they rely on
"for the precious roots,
"are left to fend for themselves
"without any basic protections."
Pretty good, you're a good writer.
Those are really good photos too.
Thanks, they're mine.
Yeah?
Wow.
It's impressive.
So, let me ask you this, all right?
Would any of this be here without the cabling companies
and without the demand from the market?
The way I see it is,
everyone's making a killing out here.
Like way more than when I started in waste management,
like when I first started to work.
Okay, I gotta pay for my own health insurance.
But, the way I see it, even with that,
I'm still coming out ahead.
Why'd you get into it?
Waste management?
No, cabling.
Oh, well my little brother he's,
he's pretty sick.
What's wrong, if you don't mind me asking?
No no no,
we think he's got this thing called omnia.
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
I've heard there's a lot of scamming going on, now too,
in like treating it, so hopefully.
Yeah, well,
what I read is that it seems like it's related to CFS,
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome,
which unfortunately his mother died of.
You know, it's more common in women.
Yeah, we're half brothers.
We have the same dad,
but he hasn't been in the picture for quite a while.
Anyway, sorry.
Oh I know what that's like.
Oh yeah?
Sorry to hear that.
Yeah but no, back to this idea
that the cabling companies created everything,
and we have to play by their rules, and that's that.
Like, I wonder how you square the fact that that means,
I don't know, bad healthcare for example,
which I'm betting is also the case
for your brother with his omnia.
Okay, see now,
this is where you and I lose each other,
because okay, how many of these cabling companies are there?
What is it, like eight?
Or nine or 10, or whatever?
And they all have to compete in the market, right?
Actually as you read in my article, it's a monopoly.
They're all owned by the same umbrella company,
but monopolies are a separate issue, continue.
I look out for myself.
I work hard.
I play by the same rules as everybody else,
which means I got the same shot.
I mean, you don't need a college degree,
or a high school degree, or whatever, diploma or whatever.
Yeah yeah, okay.
Can I ask you something else,
which you might know an answer?
Yeah yeah, go ahead.
How much is the current route you're on, worth?
Why are you asking me that?
Oh well just in terms of this idea you are proposing,
that competition cures all wrongs,
and everybody has an equal shot and all that.
I guess I'm just wondering about how,
you said this is only your first time out.
Right, you've only been in a little over a week?
Yeah, but I came into this like everybody else.
Already out here in the 120's,
so I assume your route has a big payday at the end of it.
Where usually it would take a couple of years
of doing routes for a new cabler
to see anything out here like that.
Oh and then also you mentioned that you had
thousands of points in your account already,
that you used to buy all this new gear,
that usually it would take a new cabler
years to build up to,
so I guess I'm just wondering
how you square that head start you got
with this trust that if everybody
just puts their head down and just tries so hard,
it'll all magically balance out?
On your left.
You've been passed by an automated cart.
Hey?
Hey, what does it mean when it says I've been passed?
Can I see?
Like, it says, you've been passed
and you'll lose your route in like,
and then it starts counting down.
It means you got passed by an automated cart.
What does that mean?
In the night, one of those little robotic carts
that you see around,
it tapped onto your route,
connected at the last junction you made,
and passed you.
Okay, so I got passed, so how do I get my route back?
Now you have to pass it.
Well okay, so I pass it,
so like won't it just pass me again?
I mean if it's a machine or whatever the hell it is,
if I stop it's just gonna keep going.
Mmm, yeah maybe you have to knock it off its route.
What?
I thought that was illegal.
I mean I thought that people get busted for that here.
Ah, the thought of doing something illegal.
No, hey wait a minute.
Okay look, I am not a guy
who's afraid to break the law, okay.
I've had my share of malfeasance
but that's in civilization where I know what I'm doing.
Here, I don't know what the hell's going on.
I mean like there's technology everywhere,
there's shit flying around, looking at us.
What, this never happens to you?
It happens all the time.
So what do you do?
I set traps.
Most people like using steel wire, and blue tech traps,
because they stick to the automated cart
and gradually slow them down.
But wire traps usually trigger in immediate DNA test,
and the DNA test is tough to beat.
So I've developed my own method,
which I call rock-henge.
In rock-henge the automated cart
can move around freely,
and because of that,
it doesn't automatically do a DNA test.
It'll take them at least a day or two
to come retrieve it, and in the meantime,
it'll be trying to get itself out of the pickle
it believes was of its own creation.
You've retaken your route.
So what I'm sayin' is, think of it like this,
I'm the owner of one of these cable companies, right?
I got these automated carts, okay?
No injuries, no complaints,
so what I'm sayin' is,
if I'm the owner of one of these companies,
I'm making 'em as fast as I can.
Right, and they did that,
but then the problem was that the carts kept on
getting tangled in brush,
not to mention crossing water.
So then after Lapsis there was this second wave
that we're in now.
I keep on forgetting you're new.
You probably don't know about Lapsis.
No no, I don't know, what is that?
He was a cabler who basically cracked the problem.
He wrote better code for the carts,
so they learn now, and they're basically as good as people.
But beyond that, the messed up thing that he did,
was that he went around collecting cheek swabs from cablers,
that he said was for a drive,
for a bone marrow transplant registry.
And then he used those cheek swabs
to go and build out the first version of the DNA database,
that the automated carts still use today
to catch cablers tampering with them.
Yeah, that's why you have to swab when you sign up,
right away, in case you wondered why you had to do that.
But people were actually about to strike at that point,
like those two women I know
who were in my piece that you read,
had gotten everybody organized,
but what Lapsis did just kind of killed the momentum,
and then anybody who wanted to keep their wages,
was forced into signing an NDA,
so now everybody just kind of goes about their own business.
Most people are locked into this personal battle
with whatever automated cart is on their route,
and that's that.
So, so where is this guy?
What's he doing now?
Who?
Whoever, whatever his name is, this Lapsis?
I don't know.
Although funny thing, I heard he's back out here
in the zone somewhere.
What do you think he's doing here?
I don't know.
He'd have to be quite a bit older now.
Hey, so now that we're co-conspirators,
what's your trail name?
Ow! Damn it.
You okay?
Yeah,
sorry.
Oh, my trail name?
Yeah,
it's Tiki Barbershop.
Tiki Barbershop.
Nice.
Barber, shop.
I'm not seeing you.
It can be finicky.
If you just add me on yours.
Oh man.
Sorry.
You okay?
Damn it, yeah, sorry.
What's the matter with me?
Anyway, here,
so this is my famous beef stroganoff.
It's a little short on the mushrooms, but,
you get the idea.
Wow, thank you.
Thunderstorms are approaching your area.
Take cover.
Yeah, nothing out here lasts.
Like, the longest you can expect
to be lined up with someone on their route
is like three days.
Once, I was with someone on a route for seven days,
and yeah that was like marriage.
So what, it just didn't work out?
No, no we did not.
So, do you ever hike just for fun?
No.
Yeah, you don't really strike me as the type.
No?
So then like what is my type?
You have kind of like a 70's mobster vibe goin' on.
Yeah yeah, no no, I've heard that one before.
Yeah yeah yeah, yeah.
Yeah I mean listen it's better
to be somethin' than nothin' you know.
So I'll take it, right.
I mean I pretty much ripped it from my old man.
70's mobster, you should have seen him.
So where'd you grow up?
Virginia.
You got like family there?
Yeah, my mom is, yeah.
Okay.
I'm gonna call it.
Yeah, yeah yeah, right.
Well, if you sleep at intervals around the clock,
then you don't have to sleep through the night,
and then you've got a better shot at staying ahead
of the automated carts.
This is gonna sound like a stupid question but,
do they ever take breaks?
Who?
The automated carts, they ever like stop for any reason?
Only if they break,
but then you'll see their lights flashing,
and usually they get a technician out pretty quick.
Oh, okay, interesting.
Why, what?
Well my first day, one of them stopped right near me.
There were no flashing lights or anything,
but it looked like it just got stuck.
What were you doing?
I don't know, I don't remember.
I think I was taking an unauthorized break.
Off route.
We're a little off, we gotta be off more this way.
You're not off?
No, I'm right on, too.
Hey, this is a weird question but,
when that cart stopped,
were you doing anything in particular?
Anything special with your device?
No.
What were you doing exactly?
I think I was just sitting there.
Hey, you know what?
Maybe I should just take a little detour here.
No, it'll cancel your route.
It won't cancel it right away, I mean like,
what if there was a fallen tree or something?
Here.
Off route.
Jesus Christ.
Listen.
What's your trail name?
- It's hard to spell. - Just spell it.
Ray, listen to me.
I know what your real trail name is.
I don't know who you're working for out here,
or even if you are working for anybody.
Honestly, I don't know what you're doing out here
with that medallion.
But if you want to help us,
try and remember what you were doing
right when that cart shut off.
How do you know my trail name?
There might be a trigger that shuts off
the automated carts without detection.
You might have done it without even knowing that you did it,
because you have the medallion that belongs
to the original Lapsis, which you lied about.
But despite that, I think you're a good guy, Ray.
But there's a very good reason for that,
but what do you mean by trigger?
Find the original Lapsis.
Try to see if he'll tell you what the trigger is.
It could be a code, it could be numbers, letters, anything.
You share a trail name so...
But how do you know my trail name?
Look up Half Moon Naturals.
It's a wellness brand, but they have.
What?
Half Moon Naturals.
Okay, Half Moon Naturals, okay.
Wait wait wait, why am I doing that?
Half Moon Naturals?
Hello, your ice is ready.
Hello, your ice is...
Hey!
You've been passed by an automated cart.
Why didn't my thing go off?
That's what you get, Beeftech.
You god damn asshole.
Loser!
Lapsis Beeftech.
Route complete.
Collecting route.
Total earnings, 105,690 dollars and 11 cents.
Leaving the Allegheny Signaling Zone.
See you next time.
54 Mayberry?
Welcome to 54 Mayberry.
Hey?
Yeah.
We actually don't offer charging here.
Oh.
Okay.
Thanks.
Checking in?
No, we've met.
I'm Ray Tincelli, my brother Jamie is here.
Unfortunately, I have to check him out
due to a family emergency.
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Yes, James.
So we can't let James out today,
as he is in stage two of three of magnesium acoustics,
and legally that must resolve.
Why?
It's part of our licensing for that treatment,
and as you agreed to up entry,
was that all treatments must be seen through to their end,
for safety reasons.
I'm also seeing here that the last charge
to the card for James' account ending in 1-0-0-2,
was declined today.
Could you provide an alternate form of payment please?
What a minute, it was declined?
I just paid that in full.
If the investigation affects the payment,
can you at least tell me when the investigation ends?
I'm sorry, we can't divulge
information about internal investigations.
Okay, so is it possible for a partial payment?
I'm not sure what you mean
by partial payment.
Like a partial payment, like some of the money.
Unfortunately we cannot release
any funds until the investigation...
No, okay, no no no no fine, okay.
No, that's it.
Bye bye.
Take away the headaches, take away the pain, nausea,
and you're left with what I think
is a really reasonable reaction to the world,
which is to withdraw.
Sullivan, I will be right back.
What are you doing?
Did you get any of the messages that I left for you?
Why are you here?
We're getting the hell out of here.
Yeah, so what's the deal here?
Tell me what happens, day two.
Yeah, so you'll see a specialist in the morning,
and they'll get you goin' on your treatment plan.
Treatment plan?
So do you feel like it's making a difference for you?
No, honestly overpriced placebo.
All right, so maybe you can show me around, you know.
Is there a rec center, somewhere where people play cards?
Love to know what the plan is.
All right, here's the deal, okay?
I need you to dig in with me, all right.
We've got something going on.
You feel good, you feel ready?
You pay them yet?
Listen, there's a lot going on, all right.
I started cabling.
The promotion didn't happen, I started cabling.
I want to get everything paid, okay.
I need you to pay attention,
I need you to absorb all this, all right.
So you got a pen, something to write this stuff down with?
Are you serious?
I want to know what those moments feel like,
to the people who built this brand.
Thanks Brice, great question.
Trish and I loved the quote from the scientist...
Did you find his store?
Yeah, it's in Neals, two hours, south-ish.
Well, we gotta get you home.
Why, it's on the way.
Kinda.
♪ Up the lazy river by the windmill ♪
♪ Lazy river in the noonday sun ♪
When I first saw her,
I was cabling through the woods, you know?
And then like, I saw her up this hill,
and she was like sitting there with her arms folded
on her chest, and her mouth wide open,
with one of those like facemasks on.
Like my mask.
Like sleeping, just like on a rock.
Okay, remember,
I go to my nose,
you wait in the van, I take it from there.
The powder.
Fantastic for any inflammation.
Yeah, and it's very, very moisturizing.
Of course, all of our ingredients are locally...
That's Arthur.
Cool.
What's up, Arthur?
Help you find anything in particular?
No, well actually maybe.
This is my brother, Jamie.
Nice to meet you, Jamie, John.
I'm Ray.
Yeah, we're headed up to Allegheny to do some work,
but unfortunately Jamie's not feeling well.
We don't really know what it is,
but we think it might be omnia,
based on the symptoms.
Get him to Barr-Crider?
Yeah he has actually.
What do you know about it.
Waste of money.
My wife likes the magnesium acoustics but,
I'm a, wait here a second.
Sorry about that.
I've come to really believe in tea.
Not tea, as you know it.
These are custom blends, incredibly rare ingredients,
sourced from around the world.
Other people sell them but not in the pure form
that we get here.
Small batch growers.
Really does make a difference.
You guys live in town?
No, I'm taking him up to get his cabling medallion.
Cabling?
Yeah.
I'm gonna go lay down.
Thanks.
Yeah, I'm hoping he holds up while we're up there.
It's been rough so I can get across with this stuff.
I cable a bit myself.
You been doing it for a while?
No no, I haven't.
It's only been a couple of weeks since I started.
Yeah, you could probably give me a couple of tips though.
Anything I should look out for?
I'm sure you're a pro already.
No no, I only did it for a weekend.
I mean I made a killing which was great,
but I almost took my back out
trying to catch one of those automated carts.
Enteron 920s.
Yeah yeah, they're amazing.
Just the way they handle the terrain.
They're so nimble, you know.
I'm sure you must have had to deal with them, right?
Yeah, I mean I understand people getting caught,
trying to slow them down.
But if I'd been out there with you,
when you got passed,
I could have taken care of it for you.
How do you do that?
I wrote the code for it.
And well, you gotta have a few things
up your sleeve in life, you know?
So, could have taken care of it.
How would you do that?
Taken care of?
You know, the?
What we were just talking about.
Enough of that.
You know, like the carts,
you could have taken care of.
Arthur!
You can remove the cart.
Did you ask him about it?
No, I didn't, I didn't want to push it.
There's something really weird going on in there.
But, he had all these numerology charts up.
So, I'm thinking that it might be
some kind of cipher, or something.
Because Anna said it was in a code.
You know anything about ciphers?
I don't think it's that.
All right, well what is it then?
You tell me.
Can we stop and get some hot water first?
How you doin'?
Better than I've been.
Keep drinkin' it, yeah.
Oh right yeah, I'm trying to reach
the investigations department
about a payment I have not received.
I'm not sure what you mean.
There isn't an investigations department here.
Is there anybody like a manager,
or floor manager I can talk to, please?
Well unfortunately,
I am your authorized representative,
so there isn't anybody else to talk to.
What if there isn't an actual code?
I'm thinking maybe it's a sound like an audio...
It's definitely a numbers thing.
I mean the guy had numerology stuff everywhere.
But I've been on this old cabling forum,
where there's a lot of talk about this one guy from...
Erica, what are you doing here?
Hey, what the hell's going on here?
Can I help you?
Sorry Ray, it's just procedure
when we don't get our share.
What the hell's going on, here?
We need to be paid our share of your route, right now.
I haven't been paid for my share,
how am I gonna pay you?
Have you talked to Jo?
What, Jo?
No.
Hey hey hey, calm down pal.
Felix!
What the hell is going on here?
Let him go.
Let's catch up Ray, shall we?
It's really not my problem
where you get your money from, Ray.
Because if you did something illegal out there,
then our agreement's changed.
And now it's about you, making it right for us.
Did you give me that guy's medallion, on purpose?
With that name?
Here's the deal, Ray.
We pull off a pile of old medallions.
That means you get good routes,
which is good for both of us.
But which exact medallion you get,
that's out of our hands.
But what is in our hands,
is making sure we don't get busted,
because one of our cablers goes rogue,
and smashes a cart.
I need you to get back out there, right away.
Ideally, both of you.
And I need you to put your head down, and cable.
And I mean cable.
Has Jo contacted you?
What? No.
I mean not since...
If Jo contacts you,
you contact Erica or me,
'cause she's not to be trusted anymore.
Fine.
We can be out there in a day or two.
Tomorrow.
Ray, we'll be watching you, man.
Think it's working?
Maybe, honestly, I feel like if I can figure out
everything that's in it,
we don't have to keep buying it from him.
Just do me a favor,
get some rest.
- Mind if I join you? - Oh!
Hey.
Is that stir fry?
Yeah, you want some?
Hey, Jamie.
This is Anna.
Anna, this is my kid brother, Jamie.
Nice to meet you.
So we went to Half Moon Naturals, right.
That guy, John, up on his walls
he's got all this numerology stuff, right.
So, it got me thinking like,
our medallions are 25 digits long, right?
Which is the same amount as a Baconian cipher.
Why don't we just show her the video, real quick.
What video?
Well, I brought Jamie on this, and we've been...
What, what video?
What makes you think it's a video?
I was looking at some old cabling forums,
and I found this archived post that John made
under one of his handles,
and in it, he talked about how audio triggers
might be good emergency key codes for robotics.
I checked the personal files on Ray's thing,
and this is the only that even has sound.
Who is that?
Does it have a name?
Lapsis.
Wait a minute.
How did you know that?
Because that's me.
Can I see it?
No no no.
Okay.
Why didn't you just tell me that?
Listen, I don't know what your brother stands for,
but based on our conversations,
I truly don't know whose side you're on, Ray.
Oh come on, are you serious?
All that work I did is under investigation.
I haven't made a dime.
And you want me to just hand this over to you,
without knowing what you're gonna do with it?
If this is the trigger,
then we shut down the automated carts,
and then we negotiate.
Would you rather start fresh with us?
Or go home and have that investigation wrap up,
and get nothing?
The organizing's been done.
We just need the trigger if that is the trigger.
Can I see it again?
How did you find this?
Ray somehow stumbled into downloading it
from John's old account.
Okay, ready?
One time, just for me.
Who is that?
Does it have a name?
Okay everybody.
The moment has come.
And give yourselves a big round of applause
for having the courage to stop your routes
and risk your medallions by being here.
For those of you who are just arriving today,
we have communicated demands
to Cabling Enterprises Incorporated.
Cabling is a private monopoly,
and they set all the rules.
They have chosen to abuse us,
to leave us behind, and out here, injured,
while their CEO's and shareholders get rich on our backs.
They don't care about us.
But guess what?
They're not out here.
Out here, it's just us.
It's just us, and we've got each other.
And today, we finally have a way to force them
to stop and listen.
Okay ready?
One time just for me.
Who is that?
Does it have a name?
Turtle bluff, cart offline.
Cart offline.
- Cart offline. - cart offline.
Murray's Pass, what's your status?
Go search the valley.
Murray's Pass, what's your status?
Cart offline.
Hey.
Oh, hey.
Hey, nice job out there.
Thanks, I think trapping them is more fun, but yeah.
Thanks for you know, I know everyone appreciates it.
I gotta get him back home.
Really?
Yeah yeah, and I got some things
I gotta get paid so, anyway.
Hopefully you'll hear something soon?
You know, as a result of all this?
Well, wait wasn't that stuff he was drinking helping him?
Where did you get it?
Got it at Half Moon Naturals.
Yeah yeah, it's a little out of our price range,
but he wants to see if we can do it on our own.
So I don't know, I guess we'll see.
Anyway, see you around.
But why settle for anything
but the finest, rarest ingredients from around the world,
in their purest forms, direct from small batch growers?
Maybe we wait until tomorrow.
When he's in, we talk to him.
Maybe he'll cut us a deal.
I mean I don't want you to...
Me to what?
I don't know, I mean I just met him.
He's a dad, he's...
Quite wealthy.
He's also probably not here right now.
Where do you think he is?
My bet would be that he's at Cabler corporate,
trying to cover his ass.
Oh, you talked to him.
No, ready?
Hello, John.
There's been a security breach,
and ideally we'd like to get this straightened out
by opening bell.
You're here because there seems to have been
a sort of trigger,
buried in the original code you wrote for these things,
some way of shutting them off instantly.
Do you know anything about that?
It's been a while.
Could there be a way
to shut these things down without detection?
Theoretically.
What do you mean, theoretically?
I mean I have a way to shut them down, remotely.
Remote control.
What?
I'm kidding Noori, no.
There's no way to shut these things down without detection.
Your medallion was linked
to one of the suspected cablers who disabled the carts.
This image was taken last night,
the last time their GPS device synced with the cloud.
Do you know who this is, John?
No.
No idea.
This is the result of collective action,
of people working together,
sacrificing, calling for worker-owned companies,
for protections.
All we're asking for is that we protected
just like any other industry.
It's not to attack.
Human race.
And if the industry doesn't understand that,
then shame on them.
Here you go, buddy.
That Quantum marketing here in the US,
will be hamstrung from opening bell.
And we're already seeing
a massive overnight sell-off on the Nikkei,
stoking fears that Wall Street
may see a sell-off of its own in the morning.
In developing news, this evening,
an outage in the great outdoors.
Tonight, we are tracking a work stoppage
in several Quantum cabling zones throughout the northeast.
As News Team 7 correspondent Connor Bonds reports,
that discontent stemming from automation
used in these zones.
Hey!
Who showed him that?
Come on, you know it's funny.
You were spying on me?
You were spying on me as I was asleep?
Yo, watch my glasses.
You too?
Welcome to 54 Mayberry.
Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull