1
00:00:07,485 --> 00:00:10,401
Good morning, Thor.
What's going on here?
2
00:00:10,401 --> 00:00:11,924
Jay's taking the guests fishing,
3
00:00:11,924 --> 00:00:14,144
then he's going to cook for
them whatever they catch.
4
00:00:14,144 --> 00:00:16,407
Part of new
Experience Package.
5
00:00:16,407 --> 00:00:18,409
They're calling it
"Bait-to-Plate."
6
00:00:18,409 --> 00:00:19,845
My coinage.
7
00:00:19,845 --> 00:00:21,934
Oh, my God, I think
I got something.
8
00:00:21,934 --> 00:00:24,372
[laughing][whoops] You guys
are gonna eat so well tonight.
9
00:00:24,372 --> 00:00:26,548
[Davis and Eileen
laughing]
10
00:00:26,548 --> 00:00:29,333
DAVIS:
Is that a... human skull?
11
00:00:29,333 --> 00:00:32,162
Of course it is.
12
00:00:32,162 --> 00:00:35,731
That probably end
of Bait-to-Plate.
13
00:00:35,731 --> 00:00:37,820
♪
14
00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:43,130
Okay, so,
some pretty big ghost news.
15
00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:45,088
We finally heard back
from the coroner,
16
00:00:45,088 --> 00:00:47,090
who, frankly, we
have spoken to
17
00:00:47,090 --> 00:00:49,571
way too many times
since we moved in.
18
00:00:49,571 --> 00:00:51,399
How is Marvin?
SAMANTHA:
Oh, he's good.
19
00:00:51,399 --> 00:00:52,748
Yeah, Michelle's good,
kids are good.
20
00:00:52,748 --> 00:00:54,924
- Aw.
- Girl, can we get on with it?
21
00:00:54,924 --> 00:00:57,231
Okay, well, not a huge shock,
since we all know
22
00:00:57,231 --> 00:00:59,842
his finance bros dumped his body
in the lake, but
23
00:00:59,842 --> 00:01:02,323
the skull that was found
turns out to be Trevor's.
24
00:01:02,323 --> 00:01:04,760
Knew it! You see
that chiseled jaw bone?
25
00:01:04,760 --> 00:01:06,805
You could slice brisket
with that thing.
26
00:01:06,805 --> 00:01:10,113
Congratulations, Trevor,
or my condolences.
27
00:01:10,113 --> 00:01:12,507
As an etiquette stickler,
I confess I'm at a loss.
28
00:01:12,507 --> 00:01:13,899
FLOWER: Sam, there's
an older couple
29
00:01:13,899 --> 00:01:15,423
walking in, arguing about where
30
00:01:15,423 --> 00:01:17,164
to get the best bagel
in Manhattan.
31
00:01:17,164 --> 00:01:18,556
It's obviously Ess-a-Bagel.
32
00:01:18,556 --> 00:01:20,123
Yeah, that's what the guy said.
33
00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:22,212
LENNY:
What are you talking about?
34
00:01:22,212 --> 00:01:24,606
Russ Daughters?
Are you a tourist?
35
00:01:24,606 --> 00:01:28,000
We're both tourists, Lenny.
We live in New Jersey.
36
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,264
Oh, my God. It's my parents.
37
00:01:30,264 --> 00:01:31,613
[gasps]
The mishpucha?
38
00:01:31,613 --> 00:01:34,355
We have all been
here way too long.
39
00:01:35,791 --> 00:01:37,140
What did I tell you?
40
00:01:37,140 --> 00:01:38,794
You weren't lying.
41
00:01:38,794 --> 00:01:40,448
These are some of the best ants
I've ever seen.
42
00:01:40,448 --> 00:01:42,537
And you know
your boy Pete's seen some ants.
43
00:01:42,537 --> 00:01:44,539
Well, then, welcome
to the ant-watching club, Peter.
44
00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:46,280
We meet Wednesdays, Saturdays,
45
00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:47,933
and any time Samantha brings us
an apple core.
46
00:01:47,933 --> 00:01:49,326
ISAAC:
Uh, Nigel,
47
00:01:49,326 --> 00:01:50,762
can we get back to our walk?
48
00:01:50,762 --> 00:01:52,286
I'm not interested
in watching ants,
49
00:01:52,286 --> 00:01:54,201
or having your ex-lover stare
at me weirdly.
50
00:01:54,201 --> 00:01:56,116
This is just how I stare.
51
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:57,943
I know no other way.
52
00:01:57,943 --> 00:02:00,120
NIGEL:
Okay, we can go.
53
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,296
But if Kevin or any of the ants
54
00:02:02,296 --> 00:02:04,863
from the McGregor clan show up,
you come get me immediately.
55
00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:07,388
[laughs]
Like I wouldn't.
56
00:02:07,388 --> 00:02:08,824
JENKINS:
Enjoy your walk.
57
00:02:08,824 --> 00:02:10,826
I'll be here waiting,
58
00:02:10,826 --> 00:02:12,915
something I'm very good at.
59
00:02:13,959 --> 00:02:17,615
Man, I am loving it
here in the shed.
60
00:02:17,615 --> 00:02:20,140
We are so lucky
Nigel and Isaac started dating.
61
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,620
We'll see how long that lasts.
62
00:02:22,620 --> 00:02:24,622
Excuse me?
63
00:02:24,622 --> 00:02:26,624
Oh, no,
I shouldn't say anything more.
64
00:02:26,624 --> 00:02:28,235
I mean, if I told you
65
00:02:28,235 --> 00:02:30,585
Nigel and I liaisoned
on Christmas Eve,
66
00:02:30,585 --> 00:02:32,717
it'd surely get back to...
67
00:02:32,717 --> 00:02:34,676
Oops. Pretend you didn't hear.
68
00:02:34,676 --> 00:02:37,200
What do you mean
"liaisoned"?
69
00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:39,768
I guess you'll just have
to ask Nigel, won't you?
70
00:02:39,768 --> 00:02:41,857
Let those lips
tell you themselves
71
00:02:41,857 --> 00:02:44,076
what they've been up to.
72
00:02:45,861 --> 00:02:47,689
ESTHER:
And then he went missing,
73
00:02:47,689 --> 00:02:49,560
and they never found the body.
74
00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:52,650
At least now
we finally have his remains.
75
00:02:52,650 --> 00:02:55,131
It's a little bit
of closure.
76
00:02:55,131 --> 00:02:57,960
Anyway, we thought we'd just
stop by to walk the grounds,
77
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,963
you know, where he's been
all this time.
78
00:03:00,963 --> 00:03:02,660
TREVOR:
Wow, this is depressing.
79
00:03:02,660 --> 00:03:04,662
Sam, jump in with
something here, please.
80
00:03:04,662 --> 00:03:06,751
Uh, do you have any pictures?
81
00:03:06,751 --> 00:03:08,449
I know we'd love
to see pictures of Trevor.
82
00:03:08,449 --> 00:03:09,754
ALBERTA:
Mm-hmm.
83
00:03:09,754 --> 00:03:11,930
Oh, I have some on my phone.[laughs]
84
00:03:11,930 --> 00:03:15,195
Our-our-our son Jeremy
uploaded them from my cloud.
85
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,806
- Ooh. What's he up to?
- Wh-What does Jeremy do?
86
00:03:17,806 --> 00:03:20,635
Well, he sleeps till noon
and calls when he needs money.
87
00:03:20,635 --> 00:03:23,464
[laughs]
That checks out.
88
00:03:23,464 --> 00:03:25,248
Oh, here's Trevor
as a toddler.
89
00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:28,251
Look at that punim. And that tiny shmeckel.
90
00:03:28,251 --> 00:03:30,819
Hey, that's a respectable
shmeckel for a two-year-old.
91
00:03:30,819 --> 00:03:32,516
Ooh, Respectable Shmeckel.
92
00:03:32,516 --> 00:03:33,996
Good band name.
93
00:03:33,996 --> 00:03:35,867
Uh, have you ever worn pants?
94
00:03:35,867 --> 00:03:37,304
Wait a minute.
Is that him
95
00:03:37,304 --> 00:03:39,219
with a cardboard cutout
of Mel Gibson?
96
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:42,134
Yeah, it's his bar mitzvah.
[laughs]
97
00:03:42,134 --> 00:03:43,962
The theme was
Mel Gibson movies.
98
00:03:43,962 --> 00:03:45,355
[Jay exhales]
Yeah, we-we didn't know
99
00:03:45,355 --> 00:03:46,791
about Mel yet
at that time.
100
00:03:46,791 --> 00:03:48,489
What's to know?
He's awesome.
101
00:03:48,489 --> 00:03:50,839
Ooh, ask if they're still
in my childhood home.
102
00:03:50,839 --> 00:03:53,494
Do you still live in the home
where Trevor grew up?
103
00:03:53,494 --> 00:03:55,539
I still do.
104
00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:58,368
Lenny moved into a condo
after the divorce.
105
00:03:58,368 --> 00:04:00,457
- What?
- Oh. I'm sorry.
You're not married.
106
00:04:00,457 --> 00:04:02,111
LENNY:
No, it's okay.
107
00:04:02,111 --> 00:04:03,678
It's-it's-it's been
a long time.
108
00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:05,767
I come from a broken home?
109
00:04:06,724 --> 00:04:09,249
I'm a ghost of divorce?
110
00:04:10,380 --> 00:04:13,340
ALBERTA [laughing]:
Ooh, honey, this is one
111
00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:14,950
juicy conundrum.
112
00:04:14,950 --> 00:04:17,082
Do we let Isaac know
what Jenkins told y'all,
113
00:04:17,082 --> 00:04:19,389
or do we let him live
in blissful ignorance?
114
00:04:19,389 --> 00:04:22,305
Peter, as our resident cuckold,
what do you think we should do?
115
00:04:22,305 --> 00:04:25,090
Would you have wanted to know
about your wife cheating on you?
116
00:04:25,090 --> 00:04:26,962
Look, being totally honest,
117
00:04:26,962 --> 00:04:29,094
finding out was one of
the worst days of my afterlife.
118
00:04:29,094 --> 00:04:30,879
I kind of wish I never knew.
119
00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:34,186
But if Isaac knew, at least
he'd be able to deal with it.
120
00:04:34,186 --> 00:04:36,232
- Deal with what?
- Hi.
121
00:04:36,232 --> 00:04:38,190
- Hmm?
- We're trying to figure out
whether to tell Isaac
122
00:04:38,190 --> 00:04:39,670
that Nigel cheated on him.
123
00:04:39,670 --> 00:04:41,455
What?
124
00:04:41,455 --> 00:04:43,500
I know. It's a toughie.
125
00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:46,634
Look, Isaac, um,
after you left the shed,
126
00:04:46,634 --> 00:04:49,985
Jenkins told Thor and I
that on Christmas Eve,
127
00:04:49,985 --> 00:04:51,987
when you and Nigel
were briefly broken up,
128
00:04:51,987 --> 00:04:55,947
Jenkins and Nigel... liaisoned.
129
00:04:55,947 --> 00:04:57,645
What does that mean?
130
00:04:57,645 --> 00:04:59,647
He mentioned something
about lips
131
00:04:59,647 --> 00:05:01,562
and then did this thing
with his eyebrows,
132
00:05:01,562 --> 00:05:03,041
and it didn't seem great.
133
00:05:03,041 --> 00:05:05,653
And that's coming
from a famous cuckold.
134
00:05:05,653 --> 00:05:08,264
Hey, your spouse cheated, too!
135
00:05:08,264 --> 00:05:10,005
I'm a lady.
That's to be expected.
136
00:05:10,005 --> 00:05:11,833
Your thing's just weird and sad.
137
00:05:13,138 --> 00:05:14,705
I can't believe this.
138
00:05:14,705 --> 00:05:16,707
My parents are divorced,
Mel Gibson's a monster.
139
00:05:16,707 --> 00:05:18,883
What the hell is going on
in the world?
140
00:05:18,883 --> 00:05:22,844
I get it. It was tough for me
when my parents got divorced.
141
00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:25,890
Oh, was sort of expecting
a comforting follow-up.
142
00:05:25,890 --> 00:05:27,979
I guess we're just
getting information.
143
00:05:27,979 --> 00:05:30,417
It doesn't make any sense.
They were the perfect couple.
144
00:05:30,417 --> 00:05:32,506
And it seemed like
there was still a spark, right?
145
00:05:32,506 --> 00:05:34,551
That's the thing about divorce.
146
00:05:34,551 --> 00:05:37,119
There's those moments where the
two people see each other again
147
00:05:37,119 --> 00:05:38,860
at some family
event, like a...
148
00:05:38,860 --> 00:05:40,818
a graduation or a dance recital,
149
00:05:40,818 --> 00:05:43,386
and you think there's a chance
they could get back together.
150
00:05:44,561 --> 00:05:47,129
Again, it just never takes
that uplifting turn.
151
00:05:47,129 --> 00:05:49,566
But what if
the recital didn't end?
152
00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:52,003
Yes. Wait, what do you mean?
153
00:05:52,003 --> 00:05:54,354
We throw a memorial... for me.
154
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:57,748
And my parents stay here at the
B and B for the whole weekend
155
00:05:57,748 --> 00:05:59,881
while we manipulate them
back into love.
156
00:05:59,881 --> 00:06:01,448
Are you suggesting
we Parent Trap them
157
00:06:01,448 --> 00:06:03,014
from beyond the grave?
158
00:06:03,014 --> 00:06:04,886
Okay, I don't like
where this is headed.
159
00:06:04,886 --> 00:06:06,627
That's exactly
what I'm suggesting.
160
00:06:06,627 --> 00:06:09,412
Using insider information
from their dearly departed son,
161
00:06:09,412 --> 00:06:11,719
you will create
the perfect romantic scenario.
162
00:06:11,719 --> 00:06:13,677
Oh.
And before you know it...
163
00:06:13,677 --> 00:06:16,419
Boom.
The mishpucha is back together.
164
00:06:16,419 --> 00:06:18,682
I don't know that this'll work,
but we got to try.
165
00:06:18,682 --> 00:06:20,902
Okay, time-out.
166
00:06:20,902 --> 00:06:23,295
Can we just let
these old people be?
167
00:06:23,295 --> 00:06:25,428
I mean, they got divorced
for a reason.
168
00:06:25,428 --> 00:06:27,125
Yeah, the reason was me.
169
00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:28,910
You heard them. They split up
right after my death.
170
00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:30,868
If this is my fault, then I need
to be the one who fixes it.
171
00:06:30,868 --> 00:06:32,348
Trevor thinks
it was his fault,
172
00:06:32,348 --> 00:06:33,871
and he wants a chance to fix it.
173
00:06:33,871 --> 00:06:35,482
You're not gonna
deny him that, are you?
174
00:06:36,526 --> 00:06:39,181
Okay, fine. Let's set
a parent trap for these two.
175
00:06:39,181 --> 00:06:40,617
THORFINN:
Very difficult
176
00:06:40,617 --> 00:06:42,837
to build trap big enough
to capture both parents.
177
00:06:42,837 --> 00:06:45,100
But if you succeed,
178
00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:49,060
you and small man eat
like kings.
179
00:06:49,060 --> 00:06:50,758
What is wrong with you?
180
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,025
How's Operation
Parent Trap going?
181
00:06:57,025 --> 00:06:58,592
Not exactly sparks yet.
182
00:06:58,592 --> 00:07:02,073
So, Sunday,
maybe we take 87 back?
183
00:07:02,073 --> 00:07:04,902
That sounds fine.
184
00:07:04,902 --> 00:07:06,991
Talk does not get
much smaller than that.
185
00:07:06,991 --> 00:07:08,602
Sam, get in here!
186
00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:10,560
These alte kakers
need wine, stat!
187
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:12,083
Oh, this is
so nerve-racking.
188
00:07:12,083 --> 00:07:14,999
If these two
don't end up together,
189
00:07:14,999 --> 00:07:17,001
Trevor will neverbe born!
190
00:07:17,001 --> 00:07:18,916
We never should have showed her
Back to the Future.
191
00:07:18,916 --> 00:07:20,352
Here is some wine.
192
00:07:20,352 --> 00:07:22,050
- Ah.
- Oh, thank you.
193
00:07:22,050 --> 00:07:24,008
Something smells delicious.
What are we having?
194
00:07:24,008 --> 00:07:25,662
SAMANTHA:
- It's red snapper.
- Red snapper, Ma.
195
00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,490
They had it every year
on their anniversary.
196
00:07:27,490 --> 00:07:30,101
We used to have that
every year on our anniversary.
197
00:07:30,101 --> 00:07:33,104
That's because, on our
honeymoon, we went to Acapulco.
198
00:07:33,104 --> 00:07:35,716
Right.
And the two things
on the menu at the resort
199
00:07:35,716 --> 00:07:37,805
was pork
and red snapper.
200
00:07:37,805 --> 00:07:40,416
Well, this thawing seems
like a very positive sign.
201
00:07:40,416 --> 00:07:42,592
Now play "The Best of Times"
from the musical
202
00:07:42,592 --> 00:07:44,638
La Cage aux Folles.
203
00:07:44,638 --> 00:07:46,291
["The Best of Times" playing]
204
00:07:46,291 --> 00:07:48,468
Oh, my God.
Esther, do you hear it?
205
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,339
This was our song.
206
00:07:50,339 --> 00:07:53,516
We used to sing this song
at every family occasion.
207
00:07:53,516 --> 00:07:55,431
Including Trevor's
bar mitzvah.
208
00:07:55,431 --> 00:07:58,695
I insisted we all do it in an
Australian accent to honor Mel.
209
00:07:58,695 --> 00:08:00,305
What a lovely tradition.
210
00:08:00,305 --> 00:08:02,786
It was. [sighs]
211
00:08:02,786 --> 00:08:04,222
We had some good times.
212
00:08:04,222 --> 00:08:06,224
Didn't we, Esther?
213
00:08:06,224 --> 00:08:07,748
We sure did, Lenny.
214
00:08:07,748 --> 00:08:09,924
- Trevor, it's working.
- Uh-huh.
215
00:08:09,924 --> 00:08:11,534
These two are gonna shtup.
216
00:08:11,534 --> 00:08:14,450
[laughing]:
Yay! You're going
to exist.
217
00:08:15,886 --> 00:08:17,758
ISAAC:
Nigel,
218
00:08:17,758 --> 00:08:19,499
you should know
219
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,849
that Jenkins has been spreading
the most vile of rumors,
220
00:08:21,849 --> 00:08:25,200
trying to drive a wedge
- between us.
- Is he?
221
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:29,073
He told my friends that you and
he liaisoned on Christmas Eve.
222
00:08:29,073 --> 00:08:31,119
Need I remind you
223
00:08:31,119 --> 00:08:33,600
that we were temporarily
broken up at that point?
224
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,819
So it's true?
225
00:08:35,819 --> 00:08:37,342
We were on a respite.
226
00:08:37,342 --> 00:08:38,909
A respite?
227
00:08:38,909 --> 00:08:41,564
We were estranged
a mere 15 hours.
228
00:08:41,564 --> 00:08:43,697
You refused
to even kiss me.
229
00:08:43,697 --> 00:08:45,307
You injured my pride.
230
00:08:45,307 --> 00:08:47,483
I can't even look at you
right now.
231
00:08:47,483 --> 00:08:49,485
We're finished.
232
00:08:49,485 --> 00:08:51,443
Again, we were
on a respite.
233
00:08:51,443 --> 00:08:53,794
A respite!
234
00:08:53,794 --> 00:08:56,318
So, this is where
we watch movies and just relax.
235
00:08:56,318 --> 00:08:57,928
Ooh.
236
00:08:57,928 --> 00:08:59,495
We thought maybe you could enjoy
your dessert here.
237
00:08:59,495 --> 00:09:01,584
Thank you so much.
238
00:09:01,584 --> 00:09:03,978
Would you guys like
to watch a movie?
239
00:09:03,978 --> 00:09:05,980
Oh, Jay's getting on
board with attempting
240
00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:08,330
to have your parents
fornicate. That's nice.
241
00:09:08,330 --> 00:09:10,506
Okay, Sam, now offer
to put on The Horse Whisperer.
242
00:09:10,506 --> 00:09:12,247
It was a Robert Redford film
that my mother always
243
00:09:12,247 --> 00:09:13,683
referred to as "sensual."
244
00:09:13,683 --> 00:09:15,685
You know what movie I watched
245
00:09:15,685 --> 00:09:17,774
the other night that was good?
The Horse Whisperer.
246
00:09:17,774 --> 00:09:19,515
Uh-oh.[Esther gasps]
247
00:09:19,515 --> 00:09:21,604
Oh, I know that one.
248
00:09:21,604 --> 00:09:23,432
Good choice.
249
00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:24,912
Your mom's all horned up.
250
00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:27,741
I don't think we ever made it
through that one all the way.
251
00:09:27,741 --> 00:09:29,307
Right?
[laughing]:
No.
252
00:09:29,307 --> 00:09:31,658
[laughs]
Well, we should
probably leave quickly.
253
00:09:31,658 --> 00:09:33,573
We're gonna leave
you two alone.
254
00:09:37,272 --> 00:09:38,534
ESTHER:
Oh, Lenny, you still
255
00:09:38,534 --> 00:09:39,927
got those moves.
256
00:09:39,927 --> 00:09:41,493
And you got
the sexiest shoulders
257
00:09:41,493 --> 00:09:43,060
this side
of the Long Island Expressway.
258
00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:44,496
[laughs]
259
00:09:44,496 --> 00:09:45,933
[phone ringing]
Ah, excuse me.
260
00:09:45,933 --> 00:09:47,587
Seriously?
261
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,589
- Well, it's work.
- Right-right now?
262
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,765
No, Dad, no.
No, no, no, no, no!
263
00:09:51,765 --> 00:09:53,897
Uh, yeah, hi, hi.
Lenny Lefkowitz here.
264
00:09:53,897 --> 00:09:57,118
No, it's a great time.
265
00:09:57,118 --> 00:09:58,510
Oh, she did not
like that.
266
00:09:58,510 --> 00:10:00,774
Unbelievable.
267
00:10:00,774 --> 00:10:02,210
No, Mom.
268
00:10:02,210 --> 00:10:04,560
Come back, make love to Dad!
269
00:10:04,560 --> 00:10:07,911
ISAAC:
I can't believe
I ever trusted Nigel.
270
00:10:07,911 --> 00:10:11,393
What's up with Commander Crap
over here looking all sad?
271
00:10:11,393 --> 00:10:14,526
Isaac now second most famous
cuckold in house.
272
00:10:14,526 --> 00:10:15,571
Really?
273
00:10:15,571 --> 00:10:16,790
Oh, how do I get past this?
274
00:10:16,790 --> 00:10:18,574
ALBERTA:Well,
275
00:10:18,574 --> 00:10:20,968
in my experience, nothing gets
you over the last like the next.
276
00:10:20,968 --> 00:10:22,404
You got to go smooch
someone else.
277
00:10:22,404 --> 00:10:24,928
Yeah, get some strange.
278
00:10:24,928 --> 00:10:27,757
I learned that term from
the water heater repairman.
279
00:10:27,757 --> 00:10:31,152
It means unfamiliar
genitals, huh?
280
00:10:31,152 --> 00:10:32,370
Catchy.
281
00:10:32,370 --> 00:10:35,112
What strange
is even available to me?
282
00:10:35,112 --> 00:10:37,898
I mean, other than Jenkins,
which... no, thank you.
283
00:10:37,898 --> 00:10:40,161
Thor do know of other option.
284
00:10:40,161 --> 00:10:43,164
Other day,
when yelling from window
285
00:10:43,164 --> 00:10:44,948
to son Bjorn, I learn
286
00:10:44,948 --> 00:10:47,647
there is a gay Puritan ghost
also living at Farnsbys'.
287
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,213
Perhaps since Puritan ghost
288
00:10:49,213 --> 00:10:52,608
is gay and Isaac also gay,
you two might...
289
00:10:52,608 --> 00:10:54,610
get along.
290
00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:56,612
Thor, that's pretty insulting
to suggest two people would be
291
00:10:56,612 --> 00:10:58,570
into each other just
because they're both gay.
292
00:10:58,570 --> 00:10:59,702
ISAAC:
Yes.
293
00:10:59,702 --> 00:11:01,704
Thank you, Sasappis.
294
00:11:01,704 --> 00:11:05,403
Now... the Farnsbys', you say?
295
00:11:05,403 --> 00:11:07,667
Sam, my dad blew it.
296
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:09,756
He took a phone call
at a very inopportune time,
297
00:11:09,756 --> 00:11:11,888
which my mom was always annoyed
about when they were married.
298
00:11:11,888 --> 00:11:13,934
That's not good.
Trevor's dad blew it.
299
00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:17,024
- Uh, sorry, No Pants!
- They're leaving right
after the memorial
300
00:11:17,024 --> 00:11:19,200
tomorrow, so we have to get
something to happen tonight.
301
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:21,550
JAY:
Babe, I think we got
to take the "L "on this, okay?
302
00:11:21,550 --> 00:11:23,552
We tried to get
two elderly people to smush
303
00:11:23,552 --> 00:11:25,293
at their son's memorial weekend,
304
00:11:25,293 --> 00:11:27,382
and we just didn't
quite get there.
305
00:11:27,382 --> 00:11:29,253
Their divorce is my fault.
306
00:11:29,253 --> 00:11:31,125
If I don't do everything that
I can to solve this right now,
307
00:11:31,125 --> 00:11:32,866
I am never going
to get another chance.
308
00:11:32,866 --> 00:11:34,519
I don't like
these long silences.
309
00:11:34,519 --> 00:11:36,521
They're never good.
310
00:11:36,521 --> 00:11:38,872
Okay, so, in The Parent Trap,
they sent a message
311
00:11:38,872 --> 00:11:41,091
to the one parent to get them
to show up at the same place
312
00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:42,702
where they knew the other
parent was going to be.
313
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:43,746
Okay.
314
00:11:43,746 --> 00:11:45,313
What's your point?
315
00:11:45,313 --> 00:11:47,097
You could sneak
into your mom's room
316
00:11:47,097 --> 00:11:48,882
and use her phone
to text your dad
317
00:11:48,882 --> 00:11:50,361
and invite him over.
318
00:11:50,361 --> 00:11:52,537
You want him
to sext his dad?!
319
00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:54,714
I wouldn't put
it like that.
320
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,150
I love it.
321
00:11:56,150 --> 00:11:58,674
But, yes, I want him
to sext his dad.
322
00:11:58,674 --> 00:12:00,850
You're a genius.
323
00:12:00,850 --> 00:12:03,723
[laughs]
We're going to hell.
324
00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:10,773
So, how did it go?
325
00:12:10,773 --> 00:12:12,819
I think it went well.
Found my mom's phone,
326
00:12:12,819 --> 00:12:15,082
sexted my dad, at which
point he came over.
327
00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:17,649
And then, obviously,
I got the hell out of there.
328
00:12:17,649 --> 00:12:19,956
Well, they look pretty cozy.
329
00:12:19,956 --> 00:12:22,785
Oh, baby, I can let
- you know. They did it.
- PETE: Wait.
330
00:12:22,785 --> 00:12:24,831
Are you also just interpreting
their body language, or...?
331
00:12:24,831 --> 00:12:25,919
Uh-uh, honey.
I saw them.
332
00:12:25,919 --> 00:12:27,355
Wanted to make sure
333
00:12:27,355 --> 00:12:29,183
it happened for you,
Trev. Congrats.
334
00:12:29,183 --> 00:12:30,619
You watched my parents do it?
335
00:12:30,619 --> 00:12:32,012
It was beautiful.
336
00:12:32,012 --> 00:12:33,448
Seriously? You, too?
337
00:12:33,448 --> 00:12:34,797
Cards on the table.
I was gonna leave,
338
00:12:34,797 --> 00:12:36,103
but then Hetty
called me a wimp.
339
00:12:36,103 --> 00:12:37,669
HETTY:
It was very educational.
340
00:12:37,669 --> 00:12:40,498
Esther put on
quite the master class.
341
00:12:40,498 --> 00:12:42,022
JAY:
Uh, hey, Sam,
342
00:12:42,022 --> 00:12:45,547
I'd like you to
meet Tara Reid.
343
00:12:45,547 --> 00:12:47,549
I'm here
for Trevor's memorial.
344
00:12:47,549 --> 00:12:49,029
TREVOR:
My parents are boning,
345
00:12:49,029 --> 00:12:51,031
and Tara Reid is at my memorial?
Best day ever!
346
00:12:51,031 --> 00:12:53,294
It's very nice to meet you.
347
00:12:53,294 --> 00:12:54,556
Who is Tara Reid?
348
00:12:54,556 --> 00:12:56,253
We've been through this.
349
00:12:56,253 --> 00:12:58,212
She was a huge movie star.
350
00:12:58,212 --> 00:12:59,779
I was at her birthday
at The Surf Lodge.
351
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,084
- Ah.
- She was
going to be
352
00:13:01,084 --> 00:13:02,651
my celebrity out if I ever got
353
00:13:02,651 --> 00:13:04,305
into a long-term relationship.
354
00:13:04,305 --> 00:13:05,697
Uh, Trevor's brother
Jeremy hired Tara
355
00:13:05,697 --> 00:13:07,438
off of an app
called Pop-In?
356
00:13:07,438 --> 00:13:10,746
Which is kind of like Cameo,
but for in-person appearances.
357
00:13:10,746 --> 00:13:12,661
I don't know any
of those words.
358
00:13:12,661 --> 00:13:15,533
TREVOR:
My brother couldn't make it
so he sent Tara Reid?
359
00:13:15,533 --> 00:13:18,493
Is that a bro or what?
360
00:13:18,493 --> 00:13:20,060
This is Isaac!
361
00:13:20,060 --> 00:13:23,585
Other homosexual ghost
I tell you about!
362
00:13:23,585 --> 00:13:25,456
Hello, George!
363
00:13:25,456 --> 00:13:27,241
Hello, Isaac!
364
00:13:27,241 --> 00:13:29,373
Okay, Thor go now!
365
00:13:29,373 --> 00:13:31,811
Let you scream
in private!
366
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:38,078
So, George,
tell me about yourself!
367
00:13:38,078 --> 00:13:41,995
Enough chitchat!
Let's get to the naughty stuff!
368
00:13:41,995 --> 00:13:45,172
Oh, that's a bit forward!
369
00:13:45,172 --> 00:13:47,739
- Aren't you a Puritan?!
- Yes, well,
370
00:13:47,739 --> 00:13:50,438
when I died and didn't
immediately go to heaven,
371
00:13:50,438 --> 00:13:52,701
I reconsidered some things!
372
00:13:52,701 --> 00:13:54,572
I'm a bad, bad boy now!
373
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:58,794
And I want to hear
what you're wearing, sir!
374
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:03,973
You know, it's all a bit fast
for me, George!
375
00:14:03,973 --> 00:14:06,019
How about reading?!
376
00:14:06,019 --> 00:14:07,498
Are you a fan?!
377
00:14:07,498 --> 00:14:09,849
Have you read The Iliad?!
378
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,286
What did you say
about an oily lad?!
379
00:14:12,286 --> 00:14:15,028
Describe him... slowly!
380
00:14:15,028 --> 00:14:16,638
[sighs]
381
00:14:19,510 --> 00:14:22,383
[upbeat, gentle music playing]
382
00:14:31,783 --> 00:14:34,351
Well, looks like
a life well lived, Trevor.
383
00:14:34,351 --> 00:14:36,484
Thank you all for coming.
384
00:14:36,484 --> 00:14:40,009
Losing a child is the worst
thing any parent can go through.
385
00:14:40,009 --> 00:14:42,925
But being here today
with all of you
386
00:14:42,925 --> 00:14:47,321
who loved and cared
about our son,
387
00:14:47,321 --> 00:14:50,890
it makes me feel like
he's here in the room.
388
00:14:52,674 --> 00:14:54,545
We love you, son.
389
00:14:54,545 --> 00:14:56,591
I love you guys.
390
00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:58,810
Hey, Trev.[gasps]
391
00:14:58,810 --> 00:15:00,987
The basement ghosts
send their condolences.
392
00:15:00,987 --> 00:15:03,424
I'm trying to listen
to my parents talk.
393
00:15:03,424 --> 00:15:05,469
Whoa. Are those your folks?
394
00:15:05,469 --> 00:15:07,645
I saw them boning last night!
395
00:15:07,645 --> 00:15:10,083
- They seem great.
- LENNY: Not only
396
00:15:10,083 --> 00:15:13,042
has this been a loving tribute
to our son.
397
00:15:13,042 --> 00:15:17,525
It's been a reminder of what
is really important in life.
398
00:15:17,525 --> 00:15:19,135
I'd like to say a few words.
399
00:15:20,267 --> 00:15:21,877
Tara Reid is giving a speech.
400
00:15:21,877 --> 00:15:23,531
Sure. Why not?
401
00:15:25,185 --> 00:15:27,274
First of all,
I'm excited to tell you
402
00:15:27,274 --> 00:15:30,146
that Pop-In and Taco Bell
have teamed up
403
00:15:30,146 --> 00:15:31,974
for a very exciting offer.
404
00:15:31,974 --> 00:15:33,802
Anyone that leaves here
from the memorial
405
00:15:33,802 --> 00:15:36,152
and mentions Trevor's name
at the drive-through
406
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:37,719
gets a free large drink.
407
00:15:37,719 --> 00:15:41,157
Aw. That's nice.[applause, soft murmuring]
408
00:15:41,157 --> 00:15:43,681
TARA:
I didn't really know Trevor
that well, but
409
00:15:43,681 --> 00:15:45,727
he seemed like a really warm
and wonderful guy.
410
00:15:45,727 --> 00:15:49,557
And he was a bit
- of a player.
- Yes.
411
00:15:49,557 --> 00:15:51,298
And the apple doesn't fall
far from the tree.
412
00:15:51,298 --> 00:15:55,345
Right, Lenny? He slipped me his
business card in the kitchen.
413
00:15:56,303 --> 00:15:58,000
Are you kidding me, Lenny?
414
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,132
Oh, God.
415
00:15:59,132 --> 00:16:00,611
It was a
business card.
416
00:16:00,611 --> 00:16:01,830
Like she's really
in the market
417
00:16:01,830 --> 00:16:03,136
for wholesale
lighting supplies?
418
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:05,312
[groans]
419
00:16:05,312 --> 00:16:06,313
LENNY:
You never know.
420
00:16:06,313 --> 00:16:07,662
Oops.
421
00:16:07,662 --> 00:16:09,011
I wanted to let you know
that I've decided
422
00:16:09,011 --> 00:16:10,404
to forgive you.
423
00:16:10,404 --> 00:16:12,275
I've realized
that what we have is special.
424
00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:13,973
I agree.
425
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:17,106
Sometimes it takes
a meaningless Christmas liaison
426
00:16:17,106 --> 00:16:20,066
or screaming obscenities
with a pervy Puritan
427
00:16:20,066 --> 00:16:21,850
to realize
what you've had all along.
428
00:16:21,850 --> 00:16:23,808
Oh, you heard that?
429
00:16:23,808 --> 00:16:25,810
Paul Revere never screamed
so loudly.
430
00:16:25,810 --> 00:16:27,595
Traitorous scoundrel.
431
00:16:27,595 --> 00:16:29,205
Okay, let's not
go down that road.
432
00:16:29,205 --> 00:16:30,815
The point is, Nigel,
433
00:16:30,815 --> 00:16:32,556
is that you are a gentleman.
434
00:16:32,556 --> 00:16:34,428
And that is a very rare thing,
435
00:16:34,428 --> 00:16:36,473
and I could not have chosen
a better person
436
00:16:36,473 --> 00:16:38,562
to be stuck with together forever.
437
00:16:38,562 --> 00:16:40,738
But, moving forward,
I don't think
438
00:16:40,738 --> 00:16:42,392
you should continue
to live with Jenkins.
439
00:16:42,392 --> 00:16:44,394
Not because I don't trust you,
440
00:16:44,394 --> 00:16:46,483
but because
he's a son of a bitch.
441
00:16:46,483 --> 00:16:48,703
That I cannot argue with.
442
00:16:48,703 --> 00:16:50,574
So what are you proposing?
443
00:16:51,619 --> 00:16:56,537
Well, I guess I'm saying that
you should not live in the shed
444
00:16:56,537 --> 00:17:00,497
but rather
in the mansion with me.
445
00:17:01,542 --> 00:17:05,328
You mean like in your room?
446
00:17:05,328 --> 00:17:07,461
I mean like in a nearby room.
447
00:17:07,461 --> 00:17:09,463
Don't want to rush things.
448
00:17:09,463 --> 00:17:11,682
We are really
baby-stepping this thing.
449
00:17:11,682 --> 00:17:14,859
Well, we have eternity.
450
00:17:14,859 --> 00:17:17,297
All right, Isaac, I accept.
451
00:17:17,297 --> 00:17:18,994
Ooh, what about the library?
452
00:17:18,994 --> 00:17:21,083
I quite fancy
that comfy couch.
453
00:17:21,083 --> 00:17:22,606
Are there ants in there?
454
00:17:22,606 --> 00:17:25,522
No, but Jay dropped part
of a sandwich
455
00:17:25,522 --> 00:17:27,524
behind that couch
a few weeks ago,
456
00:17:27,524 --> 00:17:30,223
so at night there are roaches.
457
00:17:30,223 --> 00:17:33,052
Oh, I think
I'm going to like it here.
458
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:35,880
ESTHER:
You haven't changed one bit.
459
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:38,970
Same old Lenny with the work
calls and the wandering eye.
460
00:17:38,970 --> 00:17:41,016
Sam, you got
to do something.
Get in there.
461
00:17:41,016 --> 00:17:42,409
Maybe there's
an innocent explanation
462
00:17:42,409 --> 00:17:44,106
for the whole
business card thing.
463
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:47,022
Maybe Tara Reid is interested
in wholesale lighting.
464
00:17:47,022 --> 00:17:48,328
JAY:
Yes, I... 'Cause
465
00:17:48,328 --> 00:17:50,373
I think she's a producer
466
00:17:50,373 --> 00:17:53,115
on those Sharknado movies, and
they may have lighting needs.
467
00:17:53,115 --> 00:17:54,682
Sharknado?
468
00:17:54,682 --> 00:17:56,379
What are you two talking about?
469
00:17:56,379 --> 00:17:59,034
I saw you guys last night.
There was still a spark there.
470
00:17:59,034 --> 00:18:01,689
Why do you even care?
Who are you?
471
00:18:01,689 --> 00:18:04,909
Look, I know you said you felt
Trevor's presence in that room.
472
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:06,302
And what if you were right?
473
00:18:06,302 --> 00:18:09,871
What if Trevor is here
with us today?
474
00:18:09,871 --> 00:18:12,917
My parents also got divorced,
and I know I blame myself.
475
00:18:12,917 --> 00:18:16,878
Maybe Trevor blames his death
for your divorce.
476
00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:18,314
Well, why would he do that?
477
00:18:18,314 --> 00:18:20,142
Because you got divorced
right after I died.
478
00:18:20,142 --> 00:18:21,622
Maybe because
of the timing.
479
00:18:21,622 --> 00:18:23,624
No, no. Trevor's death
had nothing
480
00:18:23,624 --> 00:18:25,495
to do with us splitting up.
481
00:18:25,495 --> 00:18:29,282
The-the truth is, our problems
were there long before that.
482
00:18:29,282 --> 00:18:31,284
I caught Lenny cheating when the
boys were still in junior high.
483
00:18:31,284 --> 00:18:33,590
I didn't know that.
484
00:18:33,590 --> 00:18:35,026
And we decided to stay together
485
00:18:35,026 --> 00:18:36,506
until they were out
of the house.
486
00:18:36,506 --> 00:18:38,987
But Jeremy never
left the house.
487
00:18:38,987 --> 00:18:41,076
He-he was still living there
when he was 30.
488
00:18:41,076 --> 00:18:42,817
So it wasn't T-Money's fault.
489
00:18:42,817 --> 00:18:44,645
They were just waiting
for J-Dog to grow up?
490
00:18:44,645 --> 00:18:46,212
It's very hard
to take this story seriously
491
00:18:46,212 --> 00:18:47,952
with you using
those monikers.
492
00:18:47,952 --> 00:18:49,171
So it wasn't
Trevor's fault?
493
00:18:49,171 --> 00:18:50,738
Divorce isn't about the kids.
494
00:18:50,738 --> 00:18:52,174
It's about the parents.
495
00:18:53,958 --> 00:18:55,656
Trevor, if you're
really here,
496
00:18:55,656 --> 00:18:57,832
we want you to know that.
497
00:18:57,832 --> 00:19:00,704
You were the best thing
to come out of our marriage.
498
00:19:00,704 --> 00:19:02,532
The point is,
499
00:19:02,532 --> 00:19:05,796
Trevor, we miss you every day,
500
00:19:05,796 --> 00:19:08,234
and we're so glad
you were our son.
501
00:19:09,931 --> 00:19:12,803
I really want
to hug my mom right now.
502
00:19:12,803 --> 00:19:16,285
All right, I'm going to
step in and mama bear.
503
00:19:16,285 --> 00:19:19,723
But you keep that baby
shmeckel at a safe distance.
504
00:19:19,723 --> 00:19:21,551
[laughs]
505
00:19:27,209 --> 00:19:29,864
We're never going to grow apart,
will we, Jay?
506
00:19:29,864 --> 00:19:31,518
Okay, it's a key point
in the game,
507
00:19:31,518 --> 00:19:34,042
but this feels like
a must-pause conversation.
508
00:19:34,042 --> 00:19:35,609
Smart move, Jay.
509
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:38,002
Hey, we're ♪CoupleGoals.
510
00:19:38,002 --> 00:19:40,004
I know. It's just,
I always thought
511
00:19:40,004 --> 00:19:42,746
my parents were rock solid,
too, and it seems like
512
00:19:42,746 --> 00:19:44,748
Trevor thought the same thing
about his folks.
513
00:19:44,748 --> 00:19:46,750
Key to successful marriage--
514
00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:49,057
die by the time you're 35
from lightning strike
515
00:19:49,057 --> 00:19:50,624
before things get stale.
516
00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:52,278
I know things
are great right now,
517
00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:53,801
but what about
when we have kids,
518
00:19:53,801 --> 00:19:55,977
or after they're grown up
and we're empty nesters?
519
00:19:55,977 --> 00:19:57,892
[laughing]:
Okay, I-I love to panic
520
00:19:57,892 --> 00:19:59,633
about hypotheticals
decades in the future,
521
00:19:59,633 --> 00:20:02,462
but, babe, we're never
going to be empty nesters.
522
00:20:02,462 --> 00:20:06,205
We have eight idiot kids who
can literally never leave.
523
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:07,206
- Oh, that's true.
- Not loving that.
524
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:08,816
Jay very wise.
525
00:20:08,816 --> 00:20:10,252
Hey, guys,
I just wanted to say thanks.
526
00:20:10,252 --> 00:20:11,558
I had a really great stay.
527
00:20:11,558 --> 00:20:14,125
- Have a safe drive back.
- Thank you.
528
00:20:14,125 --> 00:20:15,605
- All right, ciao.
- SAMANTHA:
Bye.
529
00:20:15,605 --> 00:20:17,303
Bye.[soft thudding, rolling]
530
00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:18,913
What was that noise?
531
00:20:19,914 --> 00:20:22,786
SAMANTHA:
I'll be right back.
532
00:20:22,786 --> 00:20:24,788
Tara, look out!
533
00:20:24,788 --> 00:20:26,529
Whoa!
534
00:20:26,529 --> 00:20:28,401
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah.
535
00:20:28,401 --> 00:20:30,098
You could have fallen
down the stairs.
536
00:20:30,098 --> 00:20:31,491
Trevor, did you knock
that vase on the floor
537
00:20:31,491 --> 00:20:33,623
to try to kill Tara Reid?
538
00:20:33,623 --> 00:20:35,973
Okay, yes, busted.