Previously on "The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City"...
To Angie's hook-up in San Diego.
Guys, there are no locked doors on this trip.
Then how am I gonna masturbate?
[laughter]
We need to get the room situation down.
-Oh, come here. -And then, like--
Like, come and see the whole property.
Welcome to my room.
I ----ing planned this sh--, and you get the best room?
[gasps]
-Are you serious, Jen? -Yeah, I'm serious.
Jen follows a different set of friendship rules--
ride-or-die loyalty or "I will burn you alive."
I've been there for you. I've gone to bat for you.
I went all out for your husband's birthday.
And I paid for that entire party.
What did you pay for?
Are you ----ing kidding?
Yes, I have!
-Really? -Are you kidding me right now?
-Girl, it was three months ago. -Oh, my God.
[boat horn blows]
HEATHER: We are moving! We are moving!
Why would I ever, ever ask--
just host a party at someone's house?
I'm concerned for Jen.
I feel like she is hitting a breaking point.
[bleep] you, Angie.
***
You are coming at me at my most vulnerable time.
You know this.
[bleep] you, Angie.
She's fake as [bleep].
***
That was really hurtful. I mean, it was so degrading
and not even funny. I'm trying to figure out--
To me, that was not funny and that was not in jest.
Like, I don't see any humor in that.
***
You guys, on my dad's grave,
I was just trying to lighten the mood because
sh-- got so ----ing weird when she was doing the tour.
She was acting like this trip was her thing,
that's like taking the best room and doing all these things
and, like, not even acknowledging you,
and I saw it, and Lisa took up for her immediately.
She didn't even hesitate.
Everything today completely caught me by surprise.
You know...
She really doesn't give a [bleep].
She's just like everybody else.
I'm really hurt right now.
Lisa, you didn't even give me the respect of coming to me
and saying, "Jen, are you okay?"
You're over there, kiki-ing with Angie K.
I care about Lisa, and Lisa basically sh-- on me.
I just feel at times like I'm being used.
And this sounds really terrible, but here she is,
you know, being charged for something
where she is supposedly conning people out of money.
She's told me she's not guilty,
and I'm choosing to believe her.
But then somehow I got conned
into paying for this entire event.
If you wanna pay someone back, you pay them back,
but me, because I know she's going through
what she's going through, I'm trying to be compassionate.
I have the money, so I thought, you know what?
I'm gonna let it go and I'm gonna hope that
she comes forward on her own without me asking for it.
And I've been waiting, and she hasn't done it.
I've known Jen forever, but lately,
Jen has been very toxic,
and I'm not sure the ladies are seeing this,
or if they're just willing to keep coming back for more.
But I'm not willing to do that. I have too much self-respect.
It was really inspiring to see you be very honest
and very real because...
I feel like that's what I'm trying to do with Heather.
And I'm proud of you for speaking up,
But there's this piece of me that is always hesitant
to say what I'm thinking because I know that I can trigger
or start her up really easily.
It's like I'm on eggshells with her.
Wait, and, Whitney, I just said this.
Nobody wants to be in a friendship hostage situation.
But my thing is just like,
why haven't you guys said anything to her?
Friends that I love, that I know
I'm not getting what I deserve in return and I put up with,
because I love them and-- -But when is enough is enough?
Like, when is it gonna be enough?
Enough sometimes when you have to figure it out on your own.
You gotta find a balance. This is not healthy, no.
I feel like a lot of the girls are either afraid,
intimidated, or something with Jen.
-Let's--Let's do this. -[gasps]
-Ohh! -Are you serious, Jen?
Yeah, I'm serious.
How would you feel if someone did that to you?
I'd be pissed.
But I don't like her behavior.
I don't like how she talks to people.
[bleep] you, Angie.
If she can talk to friends like that,
then she...will probably talk to me like that.
As the CEO of Fun,
it's time to go downstairs and have a little fun.
[dance music playing]
Yes.
Thank you for pulling me out of my funk,
and you are so sweet. -We--we all can be sweet.
We can all be bitches, but the end of the day,
we have to hear each other. -Yes.
You are friends.
* Tell me, baby *
[dance music continues]
***
Meredith, significantly more ass than I would anticipate.
All right, this is my turn-up crew.
Yes! We're gonna come.
-[laughter] -Let's do it.
***
Wait a minute. I need a drink to deal with these bitches.
-Hi, girls. -Hello!
Oh, you guys have cute, little snacks.
Heather, are you gonna take a shot?
-I am not doing a shot. -Okay, well, uh, me and...
-But I love you all. -...Champagne gang girls.
***
-I'm here. -Jen, I've been waiting
all day to do this for you. -Come through.
-You ready? -I'll be on left stage.
-You tell me if you... -[dance music playing loudly]
***
-Aah! -Yes, Whitney.
[cheering]
Oh, my gosh, yes!
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
***
Whoo! How long have you been working on that?
-All my life. -And that's how she got Justin.
Jen...
-Yes! -Come on, dance, you guys.
-Whoo! -Jen, come on. Let's go!
Let's have fun!
-Whoo! -Oh, my God.
Yeah, seriously. Come on.
I've said everything I wanna say to your face.
Why are you acting like you're mad at me?
-I've done nothing to you. -Consistent.
You--You expect me to be consistent with you,
which I have. -I ambeing consistent with you.
-Yoube consistent. -Whoo!
Wait. What does that even mean?
-Hey, hey, listen. -You do your thing.
No, no. Oh, oh.
No, you're not-- you're not doing this, Jen.
Jen. Jen. Listen, Jen.
Guess what, Lisa. I don't give a [bleep].
I'm dealing with bigger issues right now.
Jen...don't do this to me.
I'm a good friend to you. Don't do this to me.
Then be a good ----ing friend 'cause if I did this sh--
with Angie Harrington, you'd be ----ing livid, Lisa.
What am--What am I doing wrong?
Listen, what am I doing wrong?
Do that sh-- now. Do that. Do ----ing that, Lisa.
-What does that mean? -I have had your ----ing back.
What does that mean, Jen?
You saw what she just did to me.
Listen--
She's gonna do the same thing to you.
-Listen. You-- -[bleep] all y'all.
Don't you ever ----ing expect me to have your ----ing back.
-Don't! Don't you ----ing dare. -I didn't do anything.
You want her to have your back? ----ing watch where
the ----ing cup is, Lisa. -Listen.
Don't you dare come to me and ask me
to have your ----ing back. -Listen, listen.
-No. -Jen. Jen.
Don't you dare do that! Go!
-Don't do that sh--! -No, I'm not, no.
---ing do that sh--.
--Listen, I-- -No, you didn't take my side.
***
-Go! -No, I'm not, no.
Don't do that sh--. ----ing do that sh--.
-Listen, I-- -No, you didn't take my side.
You just wait for that ----ing sh--.
-[seabirds cry] -No, you can't throw food.
I can throw whatever the [bleep] I want.
[slapping]
-Hey. -Get that, get that, get that.
I'll follow you. Stop.
Just like that. Yep. [laughs] Just like that.
-Sorry, Captain. -Don't come at me,
'cause I've had your ----ing back
when nobody did, you ----ing bitch.
-Nobody did! -Okay.
Did she have your back? Nobody did!
Does she have your back? Does she have your back?
You know what? I'm done. I'm done. I'm--
-Lisa. -I had your ----ing back!
-[giggles] -Then sit down.
-These fantastic shoes. -Are you serious?
-I had your back! -....that I'll save
for another time. -I can't have that right now!
-[gasps] -Stop being a bitch to me!
I can't have it right now! I did nothing to you!
I've done nothing to you!
-Stop! -No, this is ----ed up!
I have been your friend, and I'm a good friend.
-I'm a good friend to you. -Stop, stop, stop, stop!
- Stop! Stop! - ----ing friends with you,
say it, because you never say it.
-Say it! -I am serious--
-Stop! -Say it!
-I stood up for you.
Say it. Say you're my friend. Say you're my friend.
-Jen, stop! -Say it!
It's emotional manipulation.
Make everybody else feel like they're the worst friends
in the world to you, and they're horrible.
Meanwhile, you're the one doing all the sh--ty stuff
because you shouldn't be treating me badly.
Stop saying, "Have my back! Who's my ----ing friend?
I need to know who's real!"
You're not the ----ing real one. You're the fake as [bleep].
You're fake as your boobs, your ass,
your face, everything.
Remember, you're not gonna get anywhere right now.
-No. -So just take a breather.
Come on. We'll come back for everything.
-[whispering] I'm tired. -Take a deep breath
'cause I know you have never been ambushed like that.
-I'm tired. -It's horribly painful. I know.
I want you to take a deep breath because you're good.
You're strong.
[sobbing] No one's going through what I'm going through.
-I know. -This is ----ed up sh--.
Don't even let them listen to you.
Don't let them even see you cry.
If you are Jen's friend,
you know that she has been embarrassed enough this year.
I don't think Jen Shah's a saint, but, like,
I would never kick someone like that when they're down.
I'm going through enough things. I can't. I can't.
Hey, Lisa, I don't know what happened,
but let's go up front and just-- -No, I'm just sick of it.
Like, what she did was ----ed up. Yeah, I know. I know.
There's nothing wrong with saying that.
What--What happened? Why did that--
-She took Angie's side? -No, but Lisa's being
all huddled up with Angie the whole time.
-Yeah. -Sorry. Because now
I feel responsible. -You're not responsible.
-Because if I
didn't say anything and just not freaking let her
pour that drink on my head and laugh about it,
I'm not gonna do that ever--
-What the [bleep]? -I don't know.
We have to talk about it.
You know what? I'm about to jump
in the mother----ing ocean, bitches.
No, no, listen to me right now. I want you to try--
-No. -Yeah, get me a life jacket.
She's not gonna ruin your look. Right now, you and I. Ready? Go.
Whoever gets it down first, go, go, will go.
I don't understand Heather and Jen's relationship.
Go, go, go, go!
That is one of the most hypocritical, combative...
-Weak sauce! -...codependent relationships
I've ever witnessed.
You guys just started screaming at each other
for no reason. We're--Like, what?
We're supposed to be turning up and having fun.
It's not for no reason, Danna. It's not for no reason.
I know, I know, but what happened?
I am not going to play dumb games
where if I talk to you or you or you
or anybody else, I'm being a bad friend to somebody else.
Like, that's ridiculous. I don't think what she did to Angie
earlier was cool. That's it. Bottom line.
The point is, you have to take accountability
of what we say and do.
I might exit this conversation right now.
-Yeah. -What? No.
-I wanna have it, Meredith. -Yeah. I'll see y'all later.
It's because she knows when she came to my house
and started talking about you.
I don't think I need a lecture from Whitney Rose
on taking accountability.
She tried to blame these rumors about Lisa on me.
I'm not interested in your little lecture right now.
Little girl.
You can go.
You're not hearing me, Mer.
Little girl.
[laughs]
You know what? Let's throw Angie's purse in
just to teach her a lesson, and then we'll go in the back.
Yeah, let's do that sh--.
Throw that ----ing purse into the ocean.
[laughs] Just kidding. I'm kidding, Jen Shah.
-Come on back. -Whose shoes are these?
Jen Shah, Jen Shah. I'm just teasing. That was a joke.
These are not my shoes. Are these yours?
Those shoes are-- those shoes are not mine.
-Are they yours? -They're not mine.
Great!
Wait, are those her shoes?
***
Are they...
I don't know. Nobody knew whose shoes those were.
Well, I'll put my shoes on my goddamn feet right now.
Well, if you're so rich, bitch, buy another pair.
Here's sh-- 'cause it's going down.
***
These are super cute shoes, FYI. Okay?
Those are Whitney's. Those are my girl Whitney's,
so I'm gonna put those in my purse.
-[laughing] -Hold this.
-My skirt's flying up. -Heather's...
[bleep]
-Oh, sh--! -What?!
----ing "A"!
[bleep]
Jump in the water!
Oh, my God! I hope they're not my Saint Laurent ones.
-Are you kidding? -Did they throw my sh--?
Not to be insensitive to anybody else,
but I'm really hoping it's not myshoes that went overboard,
because they're limited edition, pre-order YSL shoes
that are really hard to get right now.
Take off your 9-inch heels.
I love these. They cannot go in the water.
They cannot get ruined. Do not pour drinks on it.
Well, then--then don't bring them on the freaking boat.
Pre-order. Hard to get.
I have your shoes in my purse to keep it safe.
Where's my phone and my shoes?
Did you throw my ----ing sh-- in the ocean?
'Cause my stuff was spaced right there.
-My shoes are gone? -I just brought your shoes
with me, and I took one in my purse, look,
to keep it safe, and the other one is floating.
Whitney, I can see it in the ocean floating.
-Ladies, my shoes-- -I put this in my purse...
-My shoes are gone? -...to keep it safe.
No one touched your shoes, Angie.
Heather said they're in the water.
-Well, they're not. -Those are Jen's.
I don't know who put 'em in the water, but they're not.
Blame it on me if you want.
Well, no, I'm not gonna blame it on you,
but it sounded like some things were going overboard.
On ----ing accident.
Wait!
I don't know. They're gone.
I'm literally all the way good.
I'm gonna jump in here, I'm gonna swim home,
I'm gonna get my exercise. I'm good.
***
Coming up...
We got a call that there's a noise complaint.
-A noise complaint? -This is too quiet.
***
Uh-oh. Can't even see your eyes.
She's good now.
***
-Bye. Thanks. -Thank you.
***
-Okay. -Steps. Big steps.
***
Jen's taking a rally nap. Getting her...
-"Weekend at Bernie's" -Because tonight's--
"Weekend at Bernie's." I'm just gonna put her in an aloha dress
and just, like, move her hips back and forth.
I feel like Heather's a little bit different
when she's face to face with Jen.
She shared something
a little bit different with me at the bakery.
I keep considering my friendship with her,
but she does not consider my friendship...with anyone.
It's just like she just gets to just machine-gun everybody.
And how do you feel about that?
I feel devastated.
She wants Jen to believe that she is her ride-or-die.
But Heather's totally not being ----ing honest with herself.
-Sit up. Try some, um, drink. -Jen, have some water.
-Water, I think would be-- -She can have caffeine.
Thank you so much. It was lovely.
Thank you.
-She's gonna take a little nap. -Okay.
Yeah.
***
Are you okay?
Yeah.
***
LISA: Am I just weak? Somebody help me.
HEATHER: Lisa's so weak, she can't open the door. [laughs]
-LISA: I know. -Well, what a day, guys.
Should we go get in the shower?
[birds chirping]
***
[chirping continues]
***
So I took a nap, and let's go. Aloha, okay?
I'm hosting the dinner tonight. It's all about love.
It's all about aloha, so you know what?
I need to snap out of this sh--.
Oh.
I need to rise to the occasion, and I also need to look cute,
which I obviously will.
[line rings]
[phone chimes]
-[gasps] -How pretty.
I was trying to prop it up
'cause you were--you were taking so long to answer.
How are you doing? I know last time we talked,
you were feeling, like, very apprehensive.
Yeah, no, I really, really, really, really
wish you were here.
Angie--she's just pure fun without any of the drama,
and I trust her, and I can let loose with her.
And I don't have to have one eye on the road at all times...
[chuckles] and one eye over my shoulder.
So are you having fun?
Yeah. I mean, there's been drama from--
You would never anticipate this.
Guess who was--Guess who was at each other's throats.
I'm gonna guess, is it Jen and Danna?
-No. -Who is it?
Her cohost.
-Shut...up. -She's fighting with her cohost.
Hold on. The two that were screaming at me
are now screaming at each other?
100%.
It was a very, very hard day for Jen because--
Yeah, I mean, I was upset when we went to breakfast,
but...my relationship with Jen
is I like to turn up and have fun with Jen.
I don't have a lot of expectations.
No. No. She's only gonna be reasonable
when she really needs me.
She wasn't reasonable in her fight with--with Angie,
and then she got in a horrible screaming fight with Lisa.
Oh, honey.
This is a "girls'" trip, not a women's trip.
This is a bitchy ----ing girls' trip.
***
Hey, what are you doin'?
Um...I just finished unloading the dishwasher.
Oh. Check you out, Mr. Domestic.
I know. I know. So exciting.
Oh, my gosh. Today has been crazy.
Oh. How so?
Jen threw Angie's brand-new $1,500 shoes in the water. I...
-[groans] -You know, she, like, pushed me.
-Were you physically pushed? -Yeah.
I'm consistent. She's not. I am.
You know how she's always like, "I'm not talking to Heather.
She's not a good friend"? And I'm not consistent?
-Yeah. -Okay, like, what's real
and what's not? It's just annoying. Whatever.
Jen has been talking nothing but sh-- about Heather
for the last few weeks.
You're the most materialistic person.
The only reason you're ----ing with Angie Harrington
is because you think her fat, ----ing Elf on the Shelf husband
is gonna feed you and put you on a ----ing yacht, bitch.
I don't like living in this space of ambiguity.
I would rather be, like, "Hey, I'm not okay with this."
Heather is my friend 60% of the time.
The point I'm at in my life with everything I'm going through,
I don't need friends like that.
And now you're telling her how amazing she is
and how you live for her.
You guys are all crazy. This is, like, crazy town.
I keep, like, trying to, like, have a relationship with Jen
that she doesn't want, so, you know, after today--
Okay, you know, Lisa, I think remove yourself a little bit.
When she starts going sideways,
let her go and just don't get involved.
-Yeah, I know. -All right.
I'm gonna call you later. Keep your phone on you.
-All right. Love you. -All right. Love you.
***
LISA: You know, I'm starving. I need protein and a vegetable.
You want a protein and a vegetable?
I'm starving. Protein and a vegetable.
-I am so hungry... -Let's do this.
...and so thirsty.
Today we had the diet of champions--
champagne...
You guys are partying!
...champagne...
Did we make you happy?
...champagne...
***
[slow-motion voice] Are you serious?
Maybe a few shots of tequila...
and more champagne.
[cheering]
More champagne, please.
-Okay, this is so--I love it. -Isn't it pretty?
Yes. It's very--
I have never carried it. Today's the first day.
It's perfect, and it looks great with you.
-It looks so cute, right? -I love it, yes.
Have you seen Jen since the yacht?
No. How about you?
-I haven't seen her. -Yeah.
-Does this look tropical? -Very.
-You do look very tropical. -HEATHER: Thank you.
[Polynesian drumming in distance]
I thought there was an earthquake.
[cheering]
Okay, welcome up here, ladies.
I have a surprise for you.
***
Coming up...
Your mouth is just going like this.
There's a whole lot of bullsh-- coming out of it.
Oh, I'm bullsh--ting? Name one bullsh-- thing.
This girl's continued a friendship with you,
and I still don't get why.
***
-Okay. -Oh, my God. What is that?
I thought it was an earthquake.
[cheering]
Okay, welcome up here, ladies.
I have a surprise for you.
Come out here.
***
Ohh!
Whoo!
Fill in.
***
[cheering]
Whoo!
[cheering continues]
HEATHER: This is so pretty. I love this.
Oh, they blew out. They blew out. Okay.
HEATHER: Oh, my God. Here we go.
JEN: Here we go! Yeah!
-Oh, my God! -Whoo!
[cheering]
***
[cheering continues]
Yeah, it is.
These fire dancers are amazing.
The sad thing is, I'm gonna have to pull them aside after
and let them know they're probably not going to get paid.
[cheering]
HEATHER: I don't wanna try this.
[cheering continues]
Oh, my gosh! No, I cannot, no!
[screaming and cheering]
-Oh! -Oh, wow.
Oh, my God!
Whoo!
-Aloha, bitches. -[ukulele playing]
If there's one thing Jen Shah's good at,
it is going through hell and then setting it aside
and showing up, ready to party.
Let's focus on having some fun.
Tahi, piti, toru!Hey!
***
WHITNEY: Okay.
-Yeah! Yes. -Yes.
***
Whoo!
***
Yeah, I wanna be able to do that.
***
Whoo!
Hey!
[drumming stops, cheers and applause]
Tiana, thank you so much for coming.
-Thank you for having us. -This means so much to me.
-Thank you for having us. -All of you were beautiful.
Thank you so much.
Can you teach the ladies, you know, some moves?
***
You're gonna move your hips side to side
like our dancers here. She's got it.
Yes. Good. Feet together. They come in.
Elbows like the shape of our pahudrum. Big circle.
-That's a hard circle. -Circle with the hips.
***
No wonder you have a six-pack. This is a lot of work.
I know this move.
Definitely not my forté.
Oh, my gosh. Twerking.
JEN: [amplified voice] Pay that rent, pay that rent!
Dancing like Hawaiian dancers.
***
All this stuff, you know, I was not cut out for this.
I'm a 50-year-old with no hips, no butt.
Like, what do you want from me? I'm doing the best I can.
***
[chuckles]
-TIANA: Arms out. Here we go. -[laughter, indistinct chatter]
***
Chee-hoo!
TIANA: Hey!
***
Fa'arapu!Hey!
***
Oh!
-Hey! -[drumming stops]
-Whoo! -[cheering]
I need one of these. It just looks cuter.
Thank you, ladies, for joining us.
-Thank you! -Bye!
-Oh! -Whoo!
[upbeat jazz swing Hawaiian-style music playing]
We have a Polynesian dinner.
We have all the traditional food right here.
You see the pig? You don't have to eat it
if you don't want to eat the pig.
-Whoo! -But this is a traditional...
-Whitney wants to eat the pig. -...Polynesian lu'au.
Grab some food. We'll sit down.
MEREDITH: What is everything?
WHITNEY: Mac salad, pork, vegetables.
MEREDITH: This looks phenomenal.
***
That'll be round two.
***
That was so incredible, Jen.
-MEREDITH: It really was. -It was, you guys.
MEREDITH: It was really fab.
And, like, those boys look like they could be my boyfriend.
[laughs]
-Shut up. Oh, my God. -[siren wails]
-Shut up. -Yes!
What?
[amplified voice] Some people don't know how to have fun
up in here. We have the Fun police.
Ow, ow, ow, ow!
[cheering]
-[laughter] -Oh, my God.
Yes!
We're not in Utah anymore, bitches, okay?
-[blowing whistle] -Strippers at dinner--
this isn't just a snack. This is an entire meal.
Well, this is quite ironic.
The last time I was this close to cops,
I thought they werestrippers,
and they turned out to be federal agents.
What did you do? Heather.
I didn't know the po-po were here.
-LISA: Why are the police here? -NYPD?
Is this a prank? Is Jen playing a prank on us, though?
It's just a strange reversal of events.
-[siren whoops] -We got a call
that there's a noise complaint. -A noise complaint?
This is too quiet.
-[blowing whistles] -[cheering]
[amplified voice] Let's go, ladies!
Heather needs a lot of fun in her life. Like, I--
I feel like I'm pretty self-contained.
-All right, what's going on? -She doesn't wanna act like
she wants it. That's the problem.
No, I--Heather does! No, no, no!
-There she goes. Yes, thank you. -[cheers and laughter]
No! [laughs]
Oh, my ----ing God. I'm married with two kids.
-Come give me a dance. -Go, Whitney! Yes!
[cheers and laughter]
[sexy music playing]
I'm the--I'm in the room!
***
[laughter]
Wait, wait, come back.
Beautiful! Wow! Right on! I want a dance now. [laughs]
Your turn, Lisa. Take the hot seat.
No!
Boo! You don't look fun right now.
[scoffs]
I have zero interest in this. Like, don't touch me.
-What's happening? -Wait, where's the handcuffs?
-Yes! Whoo! -[cheering]
All I'm thinking is how germ-covered they are.
Like, I'm thinking they need Clorox wet wipes.
The only person I wanna see naked is John Barlow.
-Thank you, guys. -Thank you so much.
-Thanks, you guys. -No problem. Thank you.
-Whoo-whoo! -Thank you.
-Yes, for sure. You're the best. -9-1-1. We know your number.
I feel like that was a waste of dancers.
You didn't do anything to warrant a citation.
It's supposed to be a violation of the Fun.
Today was supposed to be fun,
and there was a lot of moments that were not fun.
Well, that's a good point.
A very good point.
I mean, let's cheers to fun, CEO. What's--
What are you gonna implement to have fun? What can we do?
How is your first girls' trip going?
I feel like the experience has been great so far,
but I feel like the energy's off.
Something's off, and I think we need to address...it.
So you guys all know that Jen and I
got into a little argument last week.
***
I felt like you are not very nice to some of the girls.
Like who?
Well, to Angie Harrington.
I think the way that you approached her
and how you talked to her made me feel
a little bit uncomfortable 'cause I don't know you
that well, Jen. -When was that?
At the choir.
Do you wanna know the sh-- I have been taking
for no reason?! -Because of @shahxposed?
-The sh-- you-- -No, in general! In general!
Don't roll your ----ing eyes at me, Angie.
From my point of view, you were screaming at somebody,
yelling at them, getting into someone's face,
and then Angie was trying to tell you something,
and you told her to shut the [bleep] up.
She's supposed to be your best friend.
I said to you in a text. I said, "Listen.
This will stay b--"
I swear I'll just walk out, and y'all won't have sh--
to talk about. -Don't leave, Jen.
You know what? Then shut the [bleep] up.
So I'm, like, sitting here watching you
talk to your friends that way.
It made me feel really uncomfortable.
And then... [scoffs] I don't know, Heather.
You know what how I felt.
***
I know, and what did I say to you?
You gotta talk to her.
I'm not your translator or her keeper and not yours.
But it's like you've told me
that if Jen ever gave you an ultimatum,
you would not be friends with her no more.
***
It's like you've told me that if Jen ever gave you an ultimatum,
you would not be friends with her no more.
***
Like, if she says, "You can either be friends with me,
or you can be friends with Angie Harrington,
I would say, "Are you for real?"
And the fact that you are giving me an ultimatum,
and Angie is not--that should be evidence to me right there
of who I should pick.
What he did was absolutely wrong,
and then promising to post an apology
and then relinquishing that commitment?
But you--But you knew why she couldn't do it.
She told us why she couldn't do it.
-Why couldn't she do it? -Yeah, what did I say?
I don't know why. Why can't she? I never heard anything.
So she spoke to her legal team,
and they advised her not to do it.
She said, "Well, if, you know, the only way
to make this right with Coach and I
is if you post a public apology on your social media
'cause you used our name."
He says, "I need to run this by the attorney."
Yeah.
The attorney and our P.R. people were like, "Absolutely not."
Because they don't want any association with you.
Yeah.
They don't want any...
-LISA: Wow. -...association with me?
***
Wow.
I didn't do anything to them, though.
They are the ones that created a fake account,
so that's why the apology needs to happen.
We told her that she needs to have a conversation with you
and explain why or why not she didn't--
But I said she needed to settle the score.
But, like, I swear that I remember...
-What? -...that you said that
she didn't need to do a public apology.
I said a public apology is ridiculous.
Yes.
Because you will be admitting to a horrible, indefensible thing
that no one in the world will ever forgive you for.
Because it would destroy--
But they've publicly humiliated---
That's my point, because it would destroy--
-They destroyed my husband! -It would destroy him! I get it!
-What about me?! What about me?! -That's my whole point!
You need to be very clear with your words right now,
and the fact that you're making it about me
and the way I worded it... -It's not about you.
Am I unclear about what I think what Angie did?
Is anyone unclear on how I feel about it?
We know it's not right. We know it's wrong.
Okay, then stop asking me about it,
'cause I've been very ----ing clear about how I feel about it.
***
Danna, why are you deeply invested?
Why are you so deeply invested in this? I really wanna know.
-Why do you care so much? -Well, you guys have gone
to lunch together, though, so she's, like,
in the middle of this now. That's probably why she feels--
She's putting herself in the middle of it.
And, Angie K., after the day you've had,
I would sit there and listen... -I am listening.
And listen from her experience and listen from my experience.
-I am listening. -And maybe...
-And I'm trying to understand. -...not take an opportunity
to take a side swipe because you're--
There's no side swipes, Heather.
If you're trying to understand, you have two ears, one mouth.
-You try to start listening-- -Well, your mouth is just going
like this. There's a whole lot of bullsh-- coming out of it.
A lot of bullsh--? Name one bullsh-- thing.
This girl's continued a friendship with you,
and I still don't get why.
This girl's continued a friendship with me?
I'm trying to understand your relationship
because she threw your shoes off the yacht today.
-We're good. -You know why I can bring up?
'Cause I've been a good friend to Jen,
and I don't know if I can say
that you've been a good friend to her.
It's highly surprising to me that someone who just
annihilated Jen on a Sprinter van
would suddenly be so concerned about her welfare
and about the terms of her friendships.
Like, check yourself,sister.
But haveyou been a good friend to Jen?
Abso- ----ing-lutely, and I love her,
and I'm ride-or-die.
-Okay. -Like, the deposits I've made
in our friendship account should grant me a little bit of grace.
And I would hope that every single person at this table
would give me that same grace because I have given all of you
that same grace.
-Can I say something here? -What?
I'll tell you what I'm curious about.
I think it's interes-- Oh, don't roll your eyes.
I'm just saying, this is not consistent
with the conversation you, me, Angie, and Whitney had
in her hot tub.
Heather is my friend 60% of the time.
The other 40%, I'm supposed to eat it,
not say sh--, sweep it under the rug.
The point I'm at in my life
with everything I'm going through,
I don't need friends like that. -No.
All I've heard for the last few weeks is how
Heather's horrible.
She doesn't care about you. She's not there for you.
She's not a good friend to you. You're done with it.
Jen, tell her why you're bugged with her.
This is the perfect opportunity to say,
"Heather, this is the issue. This hurts me."
And I think everyone needs to start telling each other
because no one here is... -I just told Heather! I have--
----ing honest. Everybody here loves everything
and ----ing lies. I'm sick of it.
I am ----ing fun, but it's hard to be fun
when you're getting yelled at on a ----ing yacht
and then come to dinner-- -Okay, this is what--
-Okay, this is what I know. -Danna, I'm upset!
-I know. -You're coming at metoday?
I don't ----ing deserve that. I'm your friend.
When did I come at you today?
Oh, my God! Are you kidding me?!
***
You're coming at metoday?
I don't deserve that. I'm your friend. I'm a good--
When did I come at you today?
Oh, my God! Are you kidding me?!
You shifted the whole mood for me today,
and I'm getting there, saying, "I'm your friend.
Say you're my friend." You can't even say it.
-What are you talking--What? -On the yacht, Jen.
-Are you kidding? -This is what I'm saying--
Stop ----ing lying! I'm sick of it.
I know Jen is not in a very great mental state.
To be so upset and/or drunk that you don't have a recollection
of what happened is... not good.
Jen is a ----ing liar.
She only remembers what she feels wronged with,
but it doesn't matter what she does or says to anyone else.
That's how Jen works.
Jen, you went up to Lisa's face and you almost shoved her.
-Yes, you did. -Jen.
-Yes, you did. -I almost shoved her?
-Jen! -You didshove her.
You were aggressive towards her.
...me to have your ----ing back, girl. Don't.
-Don't you ----ing dare. -I didn't do anything!
You want her to have your back?
----ing watch what the [bleep] happens, Lisa.
-Jen, I was trying to hug you... -We were there.
-Oh, my God. -...and tell you, I'm like,
"I'm your friend. I did nothing to you. I don't deserve that."
-You guys are ----ed up. -No, no, no,
-We're not ----ed up. -You're mean.
-You are ----ing mean. -Oh, I am not mean.
That's the last ----ing thing I am is mean.
***
Jen has a habit of deflecting. Trust me.
If there was a class on how to be mean,
like, Mean 101, Jen Shah would be the professor.
Okay, dynamic has totally shifted,
because you had an argument with her,
and now you're riding the Heather wave.
-Angie brought me out. -You have an issue
if anybody is friends with Heather.
No, no, no, no, no, I do not, you ----ing liar.
-That is not true. -Don't call me a liar.
You are lying about that. That is a lie.
Don't call me a ----ing liar, Lisa.
-That is a lie, Jen! -You're a ----ing...
The problem is you dumped ----ing champagne
on her head today, and it humiliated her
and embarrassed her, and you shifted the dynamic.
-I'm sorry, Angie. I'm sorry. -And you treated me
like sh--, too, for no reason. -Angie, I'm sorry.
I made a mistake. I'm sorry.
Where's my apology? I'm ----ing mad.
I'm done dealing with this bullsh--.
I--It was a bad joke. I'm sorry.
Okay. Thank you. I feel that you aresorry.
***
-LISA: And, Jen, you know what? -And I poured--
Okay, then, let's stay on task.
What happened is you had a lot to say about Heather
in the hot tub at Whitney's house, and then I--
You guys brought it up! Yes, I did, though.
***
You need to say it.
I can't listen to this stuff if Jen's not backing
how she really feels, because then--
-I'm about to say something. -Right. Say it.
I show up at the choir audition. Angie's there.
***
Okay, this is weird because Heather, I felt like
had a very strong opinion when we met, you know?
Babe, that's a big ----ing deal.
My feelings were hurt.
That she showed up with Whitney in a matching outfit?
This has nothing to do with me, though.
-I did not know about this. -Can I just finish?
Let her finish. Let her finish. I'm just clarifying.
Well, why are you throwing in, though, "with Whitney"?
Because she--I wanted--I wanted to just be clear about what
we're talking about. -Okay.
I didn't know that she was gonna show up with Whitney.
I had no idea. I did not know Angie was coming.
You invited us.
-To choir auditions? -Angie and I--Yes.
-Angie and I both posted... -Not rehearsals.
...on our social media to try out.
I guess I meant, like, I didn't know they were gonna show up,
like, with red gloves and an outfit
and, like, a routine, and I would've orchestrated it better
so that they wouldn't have crossed paths
and had this horrible thing... -Okay.
...that ruined the auditions for me.
I have never witnessed Heather actually just sit through
and listen and take criticism or take blame or take the heat.
Anytime the drama is directed at her,
she's gonna either deflect or forget.
Think about how I feel, you guys.
We've all had this situation. We've had friends fighting.
[voice breaking] Here's what I don't understand.
If you know somebody did something
so ----ed up and evil to me and my family,
are you okay being friends with them?
I--That's what I need to know.
If they are accountable and apologize, yeah.
***
They didn't.
He didn't call you and apologize?
He called me because he got caught.
What can I do?
He--He--He--I...
Are you not friends with Angie then?
Is that what you've declared?
And you're not friends with Angie?
I think we're all friends with Angie.
-Yeah, let's talk about this. -This has nothing to do with us.
I am not gonna not be friends with Angie.
[crying] This is supposed to be my ride-or-die, and guess what.
That's not ride-or-die ----ing characteristics, period.
What do you want me to do?
Not be friends with Angie Harrington.
Okay, I'm not gonna do that.
***
You're gonna be friends with her still?
-Yeah. -She's a piece of sh--.
I don't think she's a piece of sh--,
and I think we have a lot of fun together,
and I'm a ride-or-die for her as much as I am
a ride-or-die for you.
When I say I'm ride-or-die for Jen,
like, I'm still ----ing here.
I'm still showing up when you have stabbed me in the back,
when you talked sh-- on me.
I'm showing up for you in one of the darkest, hardest times
of your life, and that's all I need to do
to be ride-or-die at this point.
You are not ride-or-die for me.
You've shown up for me for 60%,
and then you sh-- on me and my family,
and I swept it under the rug!
You show up for me 100%? You've been 100% solid?
Absolutely!
"Pick me or pick Angie." I don't want any friends
that will ever give me an ultimatum.
I'm not giving anyone an ultimatum.
I need to know where people stand.
Because the only person I know where they are
is Angie Katsanevas.
***
Hold up.
Angie K.?
Same girl who you poured champagne on her head,
screamed at in the van,
and threw her shoes in the ocean?
Is there gluten in this pig? Because she's talking crazy.
You know what?
If you wanna acknowledge I'm your friend, you can.
If you don't want to, that's fine, too.
What are you even talking about?
I-I really need to go call my little boy.
He is 10, and he's missing me. Good night.
-I have got-- -Thank you for a lovely dinner
and a show. It was fabulous.
-You're welcome. -No ultimatum.
Let's just talk about it tomorrow.
I just need to know where to-- what category to put you in.
Put me in the category that I'm friends with her.
So when people are like, "Are you a Heather Gay
or a Lisa Barlow?" Don't ----ing do that sh--.
LISA: Lisa Barlow's pretty ----ing good as a friend.
Well, I didn't say that. I didn't say that.
No, you have perpetuated that ----ing brand.
Guess what. Go find yourself another Heather Gay. I'm out.
Okay.
I've had enough. I tried to put together a ----ing trip.
ANGIE: Okay, I just think we all need to go to bed.
And I invited this one because you said...
DANNA: I never said you had to.
Meredith, you are not the CEO of Fun.
I don't think it was any way tonight.
I would like to see how anyone would have navigated this
any better. [laughs] -No, no, nobody. Nobody could.
-You did the best you could. -So I'm going to bed.
-Well... -I'll bring Jen her hair.
[laughter]
Next time on "The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City"...
-On your mark, set, go! -[laughs]
Ohh!
[screaming and cheering]
That is terrifying and toxic.
-I am not terrifying and toxic. -Our relationship is.
You wanna know why it is? Because you flip-flop.
-Because of me? -You flip-flop, Heather.
Every time I try to speak and make my point,
you cut me off. You get defensive.
Okay, I--let's hear it. Give it all right now.
Now you don't want the opportunity?
-No, because it shouldn't be-- -Now's the not the right time?
So now I shouldn't talk over you?
You're ----ing still doing it right now, Heather!
Well, then speak and say what you wanna say!
I have!
[static]
Hey, so what time is it?
[static]
[sunglasses clatter]
***