1 00:00:01,871 --> 00:00:03,438 Mr. President, they're ready for you. 2 00:00:03,481 --> 00:00:06,354 Uh, Dear, I've figured out a way to balance the national budget 3 00:00:06,397 --> 00:00:08,051 and end world hunger. 4 00:00:08,095 --> 00:00:09,661 These are great. 5 00:00:09,705 --> 00:00:10,923 Honk Honk! [ Laughs ] 6 00:00:10,967 --> 00:00:12,142 Now, move along. 7 00:00:12,186 --> 00:00:15,189 I have man-business to attend to. 8 00:00:15,232 --> 00:00:17,408 Computerized Voice: Man detected. 9 00:00:17,452 --> 00:00:20,020 We found what you were looking for, Mr. President. 10 00:00:20,063 --> 00:00:23,066 Good, because the fate of our country depends on it. 11 00:00:23,110 --> 00:00:24,328 Now, here's what I want you to do -- 12 00:00:24,372 --> 00:00:25,590 [ Beeping ] 13 00:00:25,634 --> 00:00:27,027 Hello? 14 00:00:27,070 --> 00:00:28,593 Sheriff: Hey, Prez, I got a situation. 15 00:00:28,637 --> 00:00:30,552 So, I want to eat this sandwich, right, 16 00:00:30,595 --> 00:00:33,729 but also save some for later. What should I do? 17 00:00:33,772 --> 00:00:35,731 Ugh. Just cut it in half! 18 00:00:35,774 --> 00:00:38,690 You heard him, boys. Cut it in half. 19 00:00:38,734 --> 00:00:41,911 Wait. No! 20 00:00:41,954 --> 00:00:44,522 Man: ♪ Run around town 21 00:00:44,566 --> 00:00:47,525 ♪ Stealin' and killin' is how I get down ♪Sheriff: What? 22 00:00:47,569 --> 00:00:49,571 ♪ Well, you better be aware of somethin' ♪ 23 00:00:49,614 --> 00:00:52,356 ♪ 'Cause Momma named me Sheriff ♪ 24 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:55,707 ♪ Momma ♪ Now you got it 25 00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:57,796 ♪ Momma ♪ And don't forget it 26 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,190 Oh, no. I'd better go. [ Laughs ] 27 00:01:00,234 --> 00:01:02,888 ♪ M-O-M-M-A named me 28 00:01:02,932 --> 00:01:04,194 ♪ Momma named me Sheriff 29 00:01:04,238 --> 00:01:06,022 ♪ My momma named me Sheriff ♪ 30 00:01:08,590 --> 00:01:11,288 See? I told you he'd eat the other half. 31 00:01:11,332 --> 00:01:13,551 Yo! Why y'all just sittin' around? 32 00:01:13,595 --> 00:01:15,423 It's time to get Sheriff re-elected. 33 00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:17,468 What? I love election day! 34 00:01:17,512 --> 00:01:20,471 Oh, I don't care for all that political mumbo-jumbo. 35 00:01:20,515 --> 00:01:22,908 Too much taking sides. Hmph. 36 00:01:22,952 --> 00:01:26,999 No need to take sides. Nobody ever runs against me. 37 00:01:27,043 --> 00:01:28,740 Really? Never? 38 00:01:28,784 --> 00:01:31,134 Nope. It's not like there's anybody better for the job. 39 00:01:31,178 --> 00:01:32,657 Say, Dispatch. Yeah? 40 00:01:32,701 --> 00:01:35,399 You want to be my hype man for my victory speech? 41 00:01:35,443 --> 00:01:36,618 For real? 42 00:01:36,661 --> 00:01:38,620 Yeah, give it up for my boy, Sheriff! 43 00:01:38,663 --> 00:01:40,578 Hey! I've been everywhereiff! 44 00:01:40,622 --> 00:01:42,232 Yeah-yeah. 45 00:01:42,276 --> 00:01:45,975 And as Sheriff, if I find out you had a cool party, 46 00:01:46,018 --> 00:01:48,847 and didn't invite me, I will shoot you in the face! 47 00:01:48,891 --> 00:01:50,414 Yeaaah! Blup, blup, blup! 48 00:01:50,458 --> 00:01:52,590 That means you, Tommy! 49 00:01:52,634 --> 00:01:53,852 [ Crowd gasps ] 50 00:01:53,896 --> 00:01:55,593 Oh, I'm just joking, folks. 51 00:01:55,637 --> 00:01:59,293 But as Sheriff, I promise to just keep doing my usual... 52 00:01:59,336 --> 00:02:00,946 Usual!...catching crimers 53 00:02:00,990 --> 00:02:02,426 Crimers!...eating chips... 54 00:02:02,470 --> 00:02:03,949 -Chips. -...and making people laugh. 55 00:02:03,993 --> 00:02:05,342 [ Laughs ] Yo! 56 00:02:08,084 --> 00:02:09,651 So, I won't change a thing. 57 00:02:09,694 --> 00:02:11,131 Nothing!Why would I? 58 00:02:11,174 --> 00:02:13,959 I mean, no man will run against me, so... 59 00:02:14,003 --> 00:02:16,527 Well, what about a woman? 60 00:02:16,571 --> 00:02:18,268 Huh.Oh! Shots fired! 61 00:02:18,312 --> 00:02:19,878 Uh, honey, what are you doing? 62 00:02:19,922 --> 00:02:22,359 A woman sheriff? That's kind of funny. 63 00:02:22,403 --> 00:02:26,189 Really? Are you saying sexism is funny? 64 00:02:26,233 --> 00:02:28,365 What? No! No, I wasn't saying -- I didn't -- 65 00:02:28,409 --> 00:02:30,628 Uh... what is the question? 66 00:02:30,672 --> 00:02:33,153 Womens can be Sheriffs just as good as mans! 67 00:02:33,196 --> 00:02:34,545 Boo that Sheriff! 68 00:02:34,589 --> 00:02:36,286 [ All booing ] 69 00:02:36,330 --> 00:02:40,638 But Sheriff is my name, so, I get to be Sheriff forever. 70 00:02:40,682 --> 00:02:42,162 Right? -No. 71 00:02:42,205 --> 00:02:45,904 'Cause now, I'm running for sheriff. 72 00:02:45,948 --> 00:02:49,343 I propose that Sheriff and I have a debate. 73 00:02:49,386 --> 00:02:52,041 Tonight. Six O'clock, sharp. 74 00:02:52,084 --> 00:02:53,651 Oh, man. 75 00:02:53,695 --> 00:02:56,480 Looks like we've got a lot of work to do, Goodman. 76 00:02:56,524 --> 00:02:59,701 Goodman? -I think he's pretending to be dead, yo. 77 00:02:59,744 --> 00:03:02,660 "Mrs. Goodman for She-riff"? 78 00:03:02,704 --> 00:03:05,837 Hey, why are all y'all wearing Mrs. Goodman's shirts, huh? 79 00:03:05,881 --> 00:03:08,100 Oh, I love women, Sheriff -- 80 00:03:08,144 --> 00:03:12,061 in a non-sexual, only respectful of our equals kind of way. 81 00:03:12,104 --> 00:03:15,325 Okay. Well, uh, I was just gonna go staple up 82 00:03:15,369 --> 00:03:18,676 these really cool posters right over here. 83 00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:20,025 Whoa! 84 00:03:20,069 --> 00:03:21,244 Hey, Sheriff. 85 00:03:21,288 --> 00:03:23,681 Let me help you with that. 86 00:03:23,725 --> 00:03:25,422 [ Laughter ] 87 00:03:25,466 --> 00:03:26,858 Dispatch: Damn! 88 00:03:26,902 --> 00:03:29,339 Ooh, she made you look like a tickle-kins. 89 00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:32,255 A what?You know, a namby-pamby. 90 00:03:32,299 --> 00:03:35,215 What? I'm not a namby-pamby. 91 00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:36,520 Am I? 92 00:03:36,564 --> 00:03:38,783 Well, you are stapled to a wall... 93 00:03:38,827 --> 00:03:41,917 See you at the debate, boys. 94 00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:43,353 Oh she got you, Sheriff. 95 00:03:43,397 --> 00:03:46,095 Aw. I wish there was a way to show everybody 96 00:03:46,138 --> 00:03:47,966 I'm not a namby-pamby. 97 00:03:48,010 --> 00:03:51,883 Yo, I can use my Chit Chat Live to hype you out with that. 98 00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:53,885 What's up all my millions of followers? 99 00:03:53,929 --> 00:03:55,626 It's my boy, Sheriff, 100 00:03:55,670 --> 00:03:57,759 here to show you he ain't no namby-pamby. 101 00:03:57,802 --> 00:04:00,762 Yeah! 'Cause would a namby-pamby do this? 102 00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:02,154 That's power! 103 00:04:02,198 --> 00:04:03,895 Shut up, namby-pamby! 104 00:04:03,939 --> 00:04:05,593 Ow! [ Cries ] 105 00:04:05,636 --> 00:04:07,072 Oh, come on, Sheriff. 106 00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:08,987 Hey, y'all. It's me again. 107 00:04:09,031 --> 00:04:10,554 Him again! 108 00:04:10,598 --> 00:04:13,078 Do you think a namby-pamby would use his bare hands 109 00:04:13,122 --> 00:04:14,906 to eat scalding hot soup? 110 00:04:14,950 --> 00:04:16,734 Hot soup! 111 00:04:16,778 --> 00:04:21,391 Get your hands off my soup, you namby-pamby! 112 00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:22,914 Hey. Me again. 113 00:04:22,958 --> 00:04:24,438 Him again. Again. 114 00:04:24,481 --> 00:04:27,397 Would a namby-pamby hike deep into Old Town's 115 00:04:27,441 --> 00:04:29,312 dangerous rainforest...Rainforest. 116 00:04:29,356 --> 00:04:32,141 ...just to tell you he's not a namby-pamby? 117 00:04:32,184 --> 00:04:35,275 No. So, vote Sheriff for -- 118 00:04:35,318 --> 00:04:36,972 Monkey!Monkey! 119 00:04:37,015 --> 00:04:39,104 Sheriff, careful with my phone, yo! 120 00:04:39,148 --> 00:04:41,019 Aw, damn! 121 00:04:43,326 --> 00:04:44,762 Man: What a namby-pamby! 122 00:04:44,806 --> 00:04:47,809 Mr. President, you've got to see this idiot. 123 00:04:47,852 --> 00:04:49,419 Sheriff? 124 00:04:49,463 --> 00:04:51,465 Johnson, wipe me. 125 00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,815 Alright. I found my phone, yo. 126 00:04:53,858 --> 00:04:56,296 Damn! These comments are savage! 127 00:04:56,339 --> 00:04:57,993 "Burn in namby-pamby hell." 128 00:04:58,036 --> 00:05:00,038 "Momma should've flushed your namby-pamby ass 129 00:05:00,082 --> 00:05:01,605 down the toilet."What? 130 00:05:01,649 --> 00:05:04,173 Damn. Carl left you, like, a hundred of these. 131 00:05:04,216 --> 00:05:05,522 [ Monkey chatters ] 132 00:05:05,566 --> 00:05:07,611 What? What is it, monkey. 133 00:05:07,655 --> 00:05:08,960 I can't understand you. 134 00:05:09,004 --> 00:05:10,353 Namby-pamby! 135 00:05:10,397 --> 00:05:13,704 Aw. Everybody thinks I'm a namby-pamby -- 136 00:05:13,748 --> 00:05:16,794 Carl, the monkey, the President. 137 00:05:16,838 --> 00:05:18,709 Oh, what? The President? 138 00:05:18,753 --> 00:05:21,973 You're not a namby-pamby. You're an American hero. 139 00:05:22,017 --> 00:05:23,235 I am? He am? 140 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:25,325 I saw your video, Sheriff. 141 00:05:25,368 --> 00:05:26,674 Really?Yeah! 142 00:05:26,717 --> 00:05:28,806 And you may have preserved America 143 00:05:28,850 --> 00:05:30,982 as the most powerful country in the world -- 144 00:05:31,026 --> 00:05:33,985 if we can harness the massive potential within that amber. 145 00:05:34,029 --> 00:05:35,335 What's amber? 146 00:05:35,378 --> 00:05:37,162 Is that how they make ambergurs? 147 00:05:37,206 --> 00:05:38,860 We got it, Mr. President. 148 00:05:38,903 --> 00:05:40,470 And it's huge! 149 00:05:40,514 --> 00:05:42,994 Yes! And don't cut it in half this time. 150 00:05:43,038 --> 00:05:44,648 What is it you found in there? 151 00:05:44,692 --> 00:05:47,825 Uh, shouldn't you get back to, uh work? 152 00:05:47,869 --> 00:05:50,393 There's no way I'm gonna win re- election tonight. 153 00:05:50,437 --> 00:05:53,004 But now, we can hang out all the time. 154 00:05:53,048 --> 00:05:56,573 Uh...What if I help you win this election, huh? 155 00:05:56,617 --> 00:05:59,359 Really? 156 00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:01,709 Thank you all for the support. 157 00:06:01,752 --> 00:06:03,928 Except for the man in front. 158 00:06:03,972 --> 00:06:05,843 I guess Sheriff's a no-show, 159 00:06:05,887 --> 00:06:09,107 so, let's go ahead and vote for Mrs. Goodman -- 160 00:06:09,151 --> 00:06:11,283 Yo, what's up, everybody! 161 00:06:11,327 --> 00:06:12,676 Make some noise! 162 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:14,199 It's your boy, Sheriff!Yo, give it up! 163 00:06:14,243 --> 00:06:16,550 Just hanging with my boy, the Presi-der-if! 164 00:06:16,593 --> 00:06:18,029 The prez, yo! 165 00:06:18,073 --> 00:06:19,422 Up in United States of Ameri-care-if! 166 00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:20,771 Ameri-care-if! 167 00:06:20,815 --> 00:06:22,207 Yo, put her there, Carl! What's up? 168 00:06:22,251 --> 00:06:23,426 Wow. The President. 169 00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:25,559 Who's a namby-pamby, now, Tommy? 170 00:06:25,602 --> 00:06:27,038 Not you, Sheriff! 171 00:06:27,082 --> 00:06:30,041 This Old Town debate is about to pop off, yo! 172 00:06:30,085 --> 00:06:31,739 It's going down!It's going down! 173 00:06:31,782 --> 00:06:34,742 Old Town! Election! Debate! 174 00:06:36,570 --> 00:06:38,441 Hello, Old Town. 175 00:06:38,485 --> 00:06:40,530 Just stopping by to endorse Sheriff. 176 00:06:40,574 --> 00:06:42,402 He's the man for the job. 177 00:06:42,445 --> 00:06:44,404 -I'm voting for Sheriff now! -Yessaroo! 178 00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:46,318 I mean, if the president says so. 179 00:06:46,362 --> 00:06:47,581 Thanks, Prez. 180 00:06:47,624 --> 00:06:49,278 You think I'm gonna win now? 181 00:06:49,321 --> 00:06:50,714 Of course! 182 00:06:50,758 --> 00:06:53,238 Politics is just one big dick-measuring contest. 183 00:06:53,282 --> 00:06:54,762 Now, just go up, and show everybody 184 00:06:54,805 --> 00:06:56,459 who's got the biggest dick. 185 00:06:56,503 --> 00:06:59,419 Thanks, Prez. 186 00:06:59,462 --> 00:07:02,073 Our first question comes from Linda. 187 00:07:02,117 --> 00:07:03,901 This oughta be easy. 188 00:07:03,945 --> 00:07:07,644 Statistically, one in 4.6 women experience sexual harassment 189 00:07:07,688 --> 00:07:08,906 in the workplace. 190 00:07:08,950 --> 00:07:10,430 By proxy, how do you intend 191 00:07:10,473 --> 00:07:13,824 to make the workplace safe for all employees? 192 00:07:13,868 --> 00:07:15,260 Uh... 193 00:07:15,304 --> 00:07:16,784 Thank you, Linda. I have a plan -- 194 00:07:16,827 --> 00:07:18,089 Yeah, yeah. 195 00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:21,441 I'll show you why I'm better for the job. 196 00:07:21,484 --> 00:07:23,573 [ All gasp ]Oh, no. 197 00:07:23,617 --> 00:07:25,575 Shame on you, you pervert! 198 00:07:25,619 --> 00:07:28,273 Welp, all in favor of Mrs. Goodman, say "aye." 199 00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:29,753 [ Crowd shouts "aye" ] 200 00:07:29,797 --> 00:07:31,668 I now pronounce you... Sheriff and New Sheriff. 201 00:07:31,712 --> 00:07:33,148 Get off the stage, Sheriff. 202 00:07:33,191 --> 00:07:35,498 But Prez told me to -- Dispatch, help. 203 00:07:35,542 --> 00:07:38,675 Sorry, yo. I don't hype toxic masculinity. 204 00:07:38,719 --> 00:07:41,939 Now, you're under arrest for indecent exposure. 205 00:07:41,983 --> 00:07:43,201 No! 206 00:07:43,245 --> 00:07:46,422 President! 207 00:07:49,860 --> 00:07:51,993 President? Prez? 208 00:07:52,036 --> 00:07:53,473 Is anybody home? 209 00:07:53,516 --> 00:07:55,692 [ Man Laughing ]Man: Oh, luck o' the Irish! 210 00:07:55,736 --> 00:07:57,694 Computerized Voice: Man detected. 211 00:07:57,738 --> 00:08:00,392 Man: And next to unveil... 212 00:08:00,436 --> 00:08:02,003 Russia! 213 00:08:02,046 --> 00:08:03,308 Huh? 214 00:08:03,352 --> 00:08:05,485 [ Chanting "Russia!" ] 215 00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:07,312 President, I need your help. 216 00:08:07,356 --> 00:08:09,489 Sheriff, quiet! It's almost our turn. 217 00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:11,491 But I lost the election, and -- 218 00:08:11,534 --> 00:08:13,231 Man: Next to unveil... 219 00:08:13,275 --> 00:08:16,365 Finland. 220 00:08:16,408 --> 00:08:20,630 Seems USA's reign of power is soon over. 221 00:08:20,674 --> 00:08:21,892 Oh, we'll see about that. 222 00:08:21,936 --> 00:08:23,328 President --Quiet already. 223 00:08:23,372 --> 00:08:24,547 Mrs. Goodman is coming to arrest me, and -- 224 00:08:24,591 --> 00:08:26,244 Man: And last to unveil... 225 00:08:26,288 --> 00:08:27,637 -Wait. No. -Shut up. 226 00:08:27,681 --> 00:08:29,073 Man: USA! 227 00:08:29,117 --> 00:08:30,858 No! I won't shut up. 228 00:08:30,901 --> 00:08:32,512 You caused me to lose! 229 00:08:32,555 --> 00:08:34,383 And now Mrs. Goodman is -- 230 00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:35,819 Ewww! 231 00:08:35,863 --> 00:08:37,212 What is that smell? 232 00:08:37,255 --> 00:08:38,996 Don't get too close to those, Sheriff! 233 00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:40,737 We don't know what kind of STDs 234 00:08:40,781 --> 00:08:42,652 were around millions of years ago. 235 00:08:42,696 --> 00:08:44,915 ST what are all these things? 236 00:08:44,959 --> 00:08:47,265 They're ancient dinosaur penises. 237 00:08:47,309 --> 00:08:48,745 What? 238 00:08:48,789 --> 00:08:51,574 You see, every year, we hold a secret summit 239 00:08:51,618 --> 00:08:53,533 where nations' pecking order is determined 240 00:08:53,576 --> 00:08:57,188 by who possesses the largest prehistoric penis. 241 00:08:57,232 --> 00:08:59,582 Like I said, politics is literally 242 00:08:59,626 --> 00:09:01,018 a dick-measuring contest. 243 00:09:01,062 --> 00:09:07,024 -Really? -Now, who's got the biggest? 244 00:09:07,068 --> 00:09:11,855 Man: And the winner -- again -- USA! 245 00:09:11,899 --> 00:09:13,204 [ Chanting "USA!" ] 246 00:09:13,248 --> 00:09:14,902 Hey! 247 00:09:14,945 --> 00:09:18,688 I thought politics was about who was better for the job, 248 00:09:18,732 --> 00:09:21,604 not some stupid dinosaur penises. 249 00:09:21,648 --> 00:09:22,953 [ Laughter ] 250 00:09:22,997 --> 00:09:24,259 You sound like a woman. 251 00:09:24,302 --> 00:09:25,913 Honk, honk! 252 00:09:25,956 --> 00:09:27,958 Now, let me grab that sweet woman ass of yours, Sheriff! 253 00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:29,699 Hey! Stop that! 254 00:09:29,743 --> 00:09:31,875 Oh, lighten up. It's funny. 255 00:09:31,919 --> 00:09:34,922 No, it's not. 256 00:09:34,965 --> 00:09:38,055 Sexism isn't funny. 257 00:09:38,099 --> 00:09:41,145 You're damn right it's not. 258 00:09:41,189 --> 00:09:43,887 How did she get in here without a penis? 259 00:09:43,931 --> 00:09:45,454 Ow. Ow. 260 00:09:45,497 --> 00:09:48,239 Now, Sheriff, you want to roast these weenies? 261 00:09:48,283 --> 00:09:52,896 You bet my sweet woman ass I do. 262 00:09:52,940 --> 00:09:54,419 Man: No! Don't do it! 263 00:09:54,463 --> 00:09:55,943 Oh, no, don't shoot our penises! 264 00:10:00,774 --> 00:10:02,602 Ugh! My eye! 265 00:10:02,645 --> 00:10:04,299 Our power system is ruined! 266 00:10:04,342 --> 00:10:08,651 -Our precious manhood! -I feel so vulnerable! 267 00:10:08,695 --> 00:10:12,742 Men. What a bunch of namby-pambys. 268 00:10:12,786 --> 00:10:16,790 That was awesome, man -- I mean wo-man! 269 00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:19,183 Yo, what the hell happened to him? 270 00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:22,622 Oh, he got an STD from a dinosaur wee-wee. 271 00:10:22,665 --> 00:10:23,797 [ Laughs ] 272 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,103 He looks like he got Hepatitis BC! 273 00:10:26,147 --> 00:10:28,758 [ Laughter ] 274 00:10:28,802 --> 00:10:32,675 All jokes aside, you're gonna be a great sheriff. 275 00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:35,330 Here's my hat, my badge, my undies. 276 00:10:35,373 --> 00:10:39,290 Actually, I was offered a better job, so I quit. 277 00:10:39,334 --> 00:10:40,814 -Huh? -What? 278 00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:43,120 Have fun with cold-a-saurus rex! 279 00:10:43,164 --> 00:10:46,515 What? No. Don't leave me with him. 280 00:10:46,558 --> 00:10:49,474 Man, yo! 281 00:10:49,518 --> 00:10:51,955 Alright. What are the boys up to now? 282 00:10:51,999 --> 00:10:54,784 The penisaurs -- they brought them back to life, 283 00:10:54,828 --> 00:10:58,962 and now, they're taking over the world. 284 00:10:59,006 --> 00:11:01,399 Sheriff: ♪ M-O-M-M-A named me 285 00:11:01,443 --> 00:11:03,227 ♪ Momma named me Sheriff 286 00:11:03,271 --> 00:11:04,968 ♪ Momma named me Sheriff 287 00:11:05,012 --> 00:11:06,709 ♪ My m-m-m-momma, momma, momma named m-me Sheriff ♪ 288 00:11:06,753 --> 00:11:09,364 ♪ Momma, Momma, Momma, Momma named me Sheriff ♪ 289 00:11:09,407 --> 00:11:10,800 ♪ Momma 290 00:11:10,844 --> 00:11:13,194 She named me Sheriff. 291 00:11:13,237 --> 00:11:14,499 I will hide it.