- Where you going?
- Imma ask Mike to pick me up.
- Good, 'cause I met someone at the wedding.
Take your time getting back.
I might be working on a little brother or sister for you.
- Ma. - [purrs]
- MAN: Previously on Bruh.
- TOM: Regina moved for one reason.
To get away from Bill.
- JONATHAN: You know Bill can be hard headed
and wanna do what Bill wanna do.
That's where we come in.
- I wanna talk to you about Bill.
- What's the game? - There's no game.
- I'm not gonna see him. I'm done with that.
- He has cancer. - What?
- I'm going to L.A. to get the love of my life, done.
- Nobody's gonna make you stay?
- Hey Bill.
- ♪
- Hey, Bill.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- Um, I'm...
- You look great.
- Thanks, thank you.
- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm, um, what are you doing here?
- Mike asked me to come.
- Hi.
- Did he?
- Yes I did.
And she came right here. Look at her.
- Thanks, Mike.
- How could I not?
- So, you mean, you know what's going on?
- Yes, she knows what's going on.
- Wait, and she still came?
- Yes she did.
- They had a really bad breakup.
- And she almost tried to kill him.
You don't remember that?
- Water under the bridge.
- Nigga, his body was almost under a bridge.
Do you not know that? - That's a fact.
- Bill, shouldn't you be resting?
- Huh, what?
What you mean by that? - Well, I mean...
- What, you trying to say I look bad?
- No, you just look a little thin.
- Girl, I got muscles.
I mean, you can't see with the shirt, but, you know--
- Yeah, but...
- What the hell is...
- MIKE: Alright. - What the hell is going on?
- What's happening? - Well--
- She wanted to see you, you know?
- You said that. But why? - That part.
- Yeah, speak up, Mike. What's happening?
- NATALIE: Well... - She loves you.
She still... - Hold on.
- You said that. That's what you said.
- Yeah, but--
- Hold up, you do?
- Yeah, she does. So, we gonna dip out. Okay?
- Hold up, wait, hold up.
You, you, actually, like, you love me love me?
You, you said you never wanna see me again.
- Yeah, y'all figure that out. So, let's go.
- Nigga, I'm not going nowhere.
I wanna see what's happening.
I came for the, I ain't got my popcorn, but--
- What the hell is going on?
- Look, if you don't wanna talk about it, I get it.
- I'm sorry, Nat. Talk about what?
- Your, your cancer.
- What? What the--
- MALE SINGER: ♪ Navigating through the state of life ♪
♪ Trying to find me a shawty and make her mine ♪
♪ Now, I'll find one in no time ♪
♪ With the help of my homies
♪ I'm going up with my bruhs
♪ Going up, we're going up
♪ With my bruhs
♪ Going up
♪ Going up, we're going up with bruhs ♪
♪ Going up, we're going up with the bruhs ♪
- You have cancer? - No, I don't have cancer.
- You didn't tell me-- - You're a Taurus, right?
- What are you talking about?
- Are you saying that he got cancer?
- You are so brave. - You got cancer?
- Hold up. Mike, hold on.
- You got cancer!
- I'm, I'm not. - What's going on here?
- Agh, he got cancer!
Why you didn't say he had cancer?
- Tell me if nobody else.
- I didn't tell you.
- Ah, man, give me a hug.
- How could you not tell me?
- I didn't know you was gonna die.
- I'm your doctor, Bill.
- I don't have cancer!
- You ain't got cancer?
Why in the hell?
- Mike, what the hell is going on?
- Why would you say he had cancer?
- Seriously, Mike?!
You told her that he had cancer?
- Yes. - That's low, man.
Cancer?!
- Can I explain? - No, you lied.
- I lie all the time, first off. - He is a lawyer. He do lie.
But why would you say he had cancer?
- Yo, don't lie about my life.
- Right.
- You takin' it too far.
- That depends on who you ask.
- No, that's some bullshit, Mike.
- Come on, man.
Let me explain what I'm--
- Explain. - I was trying to help.
- Cancer?
- I have family members who died of cancer.
That's so wrong, like... - I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry that happened.
- No, I came over here. My heart was heavy.
And I was thinking about all the times that we wasted
and being mad at each other.
- Nat, Nat, what do you mean wasted?
- The times that we wasted being mad at each other.
I was willing to forgive all of that. Okay?
And just be friends.
- And I have to be dying for you to want that?
- Bill, you were a whore.
Like Mike. - What?
- Every girl in Atlanta knows your game.
And your game.
I was just too stupid to not see it sooner.
So, when I did, I moved on.
- Oh, you moved on. So who you dating now?
- No one.
- Oh, okay. Yeah, that's my point.
- No, the point is, I'd rather be single
and by myself than be limping along in some relationship.
I'm not doing that.
- That's why so many of y'all are single.
- Oh okay.
And that's why so many of y'all are assholes.
Alright, I'm out of here. - No, wait, wait, wait.
- Well, that clearly didn't work.
- You think? Watch.
- Look, I think it's pretty jacked up
that you say all that stuff to me
just 'cause you thought I was dying.
- Well...
- Well, I mean, do you mean it or not?
- Yes, I do.
- You do?
- Yeah, Bill.
I love you.
I'm always gonna love you.
- Wow.
- What?
- With everything that happened.
Damn.
- What?
- Yeah, we going.
- You know what, Mike? You've done enough. Just--
- At least he ain't talking about L.A. or Regina.
- What you want me to do? - That's true.
- He ain't talking about Regina. - You right.
But used to talk about Pam in Atlanta.
- I'm not talking about Pam in Atlanta.
- Relax, relax. - There go Pam with a guy.
Why would she fucking be in the corner?
Dumbass, get out. - Fellas, have a good day.
- Good to see ya. I like your little outfit.
- Alright, now. - You look good, girl.
- Thank you. - I'll see you later.
- We love you, man. Have a good time.
- Look, um, look, I'm sorry.
- So, what do you want to say?
- You are the second woman to say that to me today.
I mean, it's, it's... it's gotta be the truth.
I'm a real piece of shit.
- Are you still?
- I mean, I'm trying not to be.
- Guess that's a start.
- Look, I'm so sorry.
- Wow.
- What, did I say something wrong?
- That's the first time you've ever said that to me.
- Wait, what?
- Yep.
- Nah, nope, no.
- Yes.
- Then it's true.
I'm a real piece of shit.
I'm stupid.
I play games.
I'm selfish as hell.
- Wait.
Who is this guy?
- Somebody, somebody who's just tired of the bullshit.
I'm thinking about you being here right now.
I'm thinking about all the other women I done fucked over.
- Wow.
- And I just, I'm a, I'm a piece of shit.
Ain't no way around it.
- What are you doing?
- I'm just talking.
- No, this man.
Who are you?
- I'm...
- Are you sure you don't have cancer?
- No, no, no.
No, I'm pretty sure I don't have cancer.
- Good.
Uh, well, I'm gonna go.
- Whoa, whoa, no, no, no.
Do you have to?
- Well, if you continue to be honest with me
and tell me the truth, maybe I can stay and listen.
- How about this?
How about we both stay here and we can get drunk as hell?
And I'll tell you everything.
Please, please?
- Okay, talk.
- Okay.
I gotta be honest.
I haven't really eaten today, so do you, you still cook?
- [laughs]
- What? - You're funny.
- Nah, for real. - Do I--
- I know you cook. - Right.
- I mean can you cook for me?
Come on, you said it yourself I look thin.
Don't make me prove it.
I look real thin.
You can see my bones.
- Okay, okay, I'll cook.
You talk, though.
- I'll do all the talking, you do all the cooking.
- Okay. - Okay.
- Alright.
- [rap music]
- You don't think that worked?
- It doesn't work that way, Mike.
- It did, it did. - Did it, though?
- Yeah, as soon as he saw her, he stopped talking about Regina.
- It did kinda work. - See?
- I don't know, guys. I don't know.
- He did for real.
- Yeah, can you video chat him?
- Yeah, I can do that.
- He's not answering for me.
Maybe he'll answer for you.
- Yeah, he will.
He's still in love with Regina.
He's--he's ready.
- We talking about Bill.
- Yes, Bill.
The sucker for love.
You're the dog here, Mike.
- Just because your dog is on the low
don't mean it don't bark, bruh.
- Okay, okay all dogs bark.
But not everybody needs to hear them bark.
- [imitates barking] - Okay?
You know what I'm saying? Hey, what did he say?
- Sound like a wounded dog. He ain't answering.
- That's 'cause he in there tapping that ass.
- You think so? - I think so.
- For real? - Yeah.
- Hey, I'm finna go back there, then.
- John, shut, why would you go there?
- I'm tryin' to see what that be like.
I'm tryin' to be with it with the look.
- Hey, John, I assure you he gonna tell us. Okay?
Just stay put, please. - He'll tell us in the morning.
- She was bad. - She was bad.
I brought her over in them yoga pants.
- She look good. - Good, bro.
- You caught her at the perfect time.
- Real booty. - Man.
- That's real booty. - Oh, man.
- If that don't work out with them, I might--
- Just supple.
I, I just I miss, I miss real butts. You know?
- You sound corny as hell.
"I miss real butts."
- Real gluteus maximus.
- The gluteus maximus.
And the minimus and the medius.
- What?
- You like flat butts.
- Yes.
I was, I was worried about you, man.
- Okay, yeah, I kinda do. I do, I do.
- Who likes flat? How do you like flat?
It look like just they back go.
They back never, it's called a neverending back.
- You know, small butts matter too.
Okay, let's be realistic.
- That's true, small butts matter, you should wear that.
- But that's why we thought you were with that white girl.
- Guys, can you stop with that? I'm not with her. Okay?
- Yeah, I was worried, man. - Good.
- Why do you keep saying you're worried?
- 'Cause I thought you gave up on the Black, on the sistas.
- Who on earth said I gave up on Black sistas?
- You didn't.
I'm just happy to hear that.
- Valerie, I mean, I been worried about you ever since.
- Bro, okay, I'm not the kind of guy
who's ignorant enough to think
that just because Valerie's a little bit crazy
that all Black women are that way.
- Thank you. - First of all.
- I agree. - Thank you. Yes.
- Give me some.
- Don't call me ignorant.
'Cause how do you know all Black women are crazy?
- What? - Aren't crazy?
- All Black women are not crazy. - Nah.
- Tell me one Black woman you know that's not crazy.
- Nigga, my grandmother, okay?
- Nigga, she shot yo' grandpa.
- That's 'cause he provoked her to do so. Okay?
Don't judge my grandma again.
- Guess, guess again.
- What about the lady you always talk about?
Um, Sister Sylvia from middle school.
- Wait, who's that? - She was a freak.
She was a freak under that habit.
- She's a freak.
You was in middle school, man.
That's molestation, touching on you?
- No, no, no, that was in high school.
And she came at me.
- That's still underage.
- Wait, wait, wait, are you serious?
- Yeah.
- Bro, that's, that's disgusting.
- That's a problem.
- No, it's not. - Yes, it is.
- Listen, just because you're a male and she's a female
doesn't make that okay if you're underage.
- Bruh, she taught me everything I know.
That's why these thots be going crazy today.
- No, this guy. - Okay. Enough.
- What?
- I'm cutting you off. You need to leave.
- Excuse me?
- You been sitting here talking about white women
and crazy Black women.
- Who are you? - We sorry.
- Hey, Mike, just. - Come on, that's not right.
- We's talking about crazy Black women,
then poof, one appears.
- No, okay, Mike. - Boom, right there.
- You know what? Fuck you. - Mike.
- Fuck me, you want to?
- In your dreams, nigga. You little asshole.
- There ain't nothing little over here baby.
- Mike. - Nothing little over here.
- Yeah, yeah, you wish. - I'm sorry.
- Don't apologize to her.
- Mike, okay, Mike, Mike, Mike, time to go. Let's go.
- Nah, I'm not going anywhere.
I'm chillin'. I was havin' a good time.
We were havin' a private conversation over here.
- Mike, just stop it, man. Don't take it out on her.
- Take what out on her?
- Because you're talking crazy to her.
- What, what? - Mike, shut up.
- Don't apologize to her. - You're rude, bro.
- She was over here in our damn conversation.
- But you're being rude.
- Hey, hey, don't worry about it. It's all good.
- Well, you was doing great service.
You was really good. - MIKE: She was aiight.
- Mike, shut up.
- Nigga, are you taking a? Give me that shit.
- What you gonna do? - Yo' Mike.
You can't take the bottle. What is that?
What's wrong with you, man?
We so sorry.
- Who's cut off?
- Okay, Mike, Mike, it's, uh, time for us to go.
- Yes. - I'm driving you home.
- I can drive myself home. - No, you cannot.
- I'm driving you. - I can drive myself.
- I said I'm driving you. - Yeah.
- We don't, we can't afford to lose your license.
- Fine, fine, fine. - I need a ride too, though.
- I know, John. - Okay.
- Come on. - Alright.
I'm so sorry.
Please forgive us.
He, he drunk. Okay? - Don't worry about it.
- The rudeness and the crazy Black woman,
that's not how everybody feels.
So, I'm sorry.
- Well, at least one of you knows how to treat a lady.
- Thank you. - You know what? Hold on.
- Okay, I can hold.
- Here, there's my number.
- Oh, thank you.
- He don't want your number. - Shut up, Mike.
Thank you so much. Thank you. - Yeah. yeah you welcome.
Now, get his ass out of here. - I'm a get him out for ya.
Let's go. Thank you. - Get yo' ass out of here.
- I'm sorry about that. - Yeah.
Little mini dick Mike.
- Mini dick. Woman! - Yeah.
- ♪
- Mm, so I see you can still cook.
- Of course I can.
- And you smell beautiful.
- Boy.
- What is that, like, essential oils?
- Oh my God, you're so lame.
- How am I lame?
Is that any way to talk to a dying man?
- It's not funny at all.
- Okay. - Yeah.
- You right, you right, my bad.
- Yeah, so, why was Mike so dead set on getting me over here?
- I just, uh...
- What?
- Nothing, nothing.
- Uh-uh.
Tell me or I'm gonna leave.
- Don't do that. Don't go.
I do not wanna be by myself tonight.
- Oh, this is cute.
I love this honest boo.
- Get out of here.
I mean, hell, what I got to lose, huh?
- That's all I ever wanted in the first place.
- Yeah, I know.
- Do you?
- Tell me.
- I just wanted you to be honest.
Okay?
If you were into me, say that.
And if you weren't, then you could've said that too.
I just wanted the truth.
- I mean, sometimes a man don't know.
- How could you not know?
- I know it don't make any sense, but I promise you.
- No. - It's the truth.
Sometimes a man just doesn't know what he wants.
- You need to explain that.
- Okay.
Look, I wanted you.
Definitely wanted you.
But I also wanted to see what else was out there.
You know?
I didn't want to feel like I was missing out on something.
You know?
- And you think men are the only ones who think like that?
- Of course. That's why we're men.
Come on.
- Ohhhh, no, Bill.
Women think the same thing. [laughs]
- Stop playing. Y'all do? - Hell, yeah.
Probably more than y'all.
- Well, damn. - Yep.
So, you should've just been honest.
- Maybe you're right.
- Maybe?
- No, okay, no, no, you're right.
- Yeah.
Did you ever think that maybe I would've been okay with that?
- Okay with what?
- With you figuring out what you wanted.
- What? Hold up, nah. You're joking?
- No, I'm serious.
I would've been cool with you figuring out what you wanted
as we figured this out together.
- Wow.
Ain't no woman ever say that to me.
- I'm sure.
- Wow, this is...
- Yeah, so, you should've just told me. So...
- Okay, you really mean that?
- Yes, I do.
- Damn, damn. Wow. - Yeah.
So, say what's on your mind.
- I wanna fuck.
- Damn, nigga.
- What?
You said say what's on my mind.
- Yeah, but don't be an asshole about it.
- Alright, my fault.
I thought I was just saying what you wanted.
- Well, I need to go shower.
- Wow, you know what? That's--what a coincidence.
So do I.
- Well, then let's go.
- Oh, word.
Okay, well, let's go.
- [rap music]
- You're drunk.
- [unintelligible]
- You can't be getting this drunk, Mike.
- Alright Mike, get out, sleep this off,
we'll talk tomorrow. Alright?
- Have a good night. - Shut up.
- It'll be good. - Yeah, thanks.
- Alright.
Can you make it upstairs? You need me to hold you?
- Can you unlock the door, please?
- Mike. - Nigga, I don't know how to--
Let me out, nigga! Shit.
- Just relax, Mike. Be good. - Some people shouldn't drink.
- Mike, take it easy on my door handle.
- He can't get out. - Man.
- Hey, don't slam my door!
- Stop slamming my goddamn door!
- Wow.
- Ah, bro, he really pissed at Pam.
- Yo, he's so mad right now.
- Like, he's so sprung and he don't even know it.
- Yeah, clearly. - Like, it's crazy.
What you about to get into, though?
- I'm about to go home and go to sleep.
- Oh, you got that white girl at the crib?
- No.
- You trying to give her some vitamin D.
- No. - No, look for real, though.
Let's play some cards or something.
- John, what's going on, man? You wanted to go to the bar.
We went to the bar. We had some fun.
And now you wanna play some cards.
Like, what's going on with you?
- I'm trying to just hang out with my bruhs.
Come on. Like, what are you talking about?
I'm just trying to kick it. - Oh.
- What? - Nevermind. I get it.
- What you get?
- You momma got somebody at the house?
- You already know? Yeah.
So, you know I ain't trying to hear that, bro.
That's why. Yeah, so... - Awe, damn.
- Let me just spend the night at your crib,
if that's cool.
- Okay, John, here's the thing.
I got, um, Greg coming to stay with me this weekend.
- Oh, your college roommate.
Greg.
- Yeah, yeah, so actually he's relocating to Atlanta
so, he's gonna be staying with me indefinitely
until he finds his own place. - Okay, that's what's up.
- Yeah, nah, it's good.
But, uh, as you can probably understand
I'm gonna need a little bit of alone time before he gets here.
- Bro, you don't need no alone time.
You need more time to spend together.
Like, look, let me just sleep in your bed.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, you sleep at one end.
I sleep at the other end.
Just don't be putting your feet in my face.
Ain't nothing weird about it. - Okay.
- Like when we was little.
Like when we had a sleepover.
Matter of fact, stop by my momma's house.
I'll get my pajamas, right?
I get all my stand-up specials.
I get the Martin: You So Crazy, the Martin: Delirious,
I get all of those, right? We watch all of them, right?
- Okay. - Right?
I get the popcorn. We kick it. You feel me?
Be like old times with the popcorn.
You be right there wit' it. Cool?
- So, John, as appealing as all that sounds,
I'm gonna take you home tonight and drop you off,
I'm gonna get some sleep. How's that?
- Okay. Alright, you gotta get some rest
'cause you have to go to work
in the morning 'cause you're a doctor.
- That's right. - Understood.
So, listen, let me just sleep on the couch.
- John.
- I can't sleep on the couch?
- Every time you sleep on the couch
you got the TV super loud.
You keep the lights on all night.
I can't sleep that way, bro. I need a little peace.
- Man, that's 'cause I just be needing to keep company.
You know what I mean?
You know, I just need the TV keep me company
and, you know, it comforts me.
- John. - What?
- You need a girl, man.
- Don't start that, man. - You do.
You sound like my momma. Don't start that, Tom.
- Well, she's right about this. - No she isn't.
- Hey, hey, did you ever call that girl?
The one you said, "She saw me, she really saw me."
You ever call her? - Okay, I didn't--
First of all, I didn't sound like--I don't talk like that.
- That's what you said. - That's how you talk, nigga.
She saw me. Bro, she out my league, though.
Real talk, man. I couldn't, like, she.
- What about the bartender tonight?
She was feeling you, bro. She gave you the number.
- She did give me the number, and she was bad.
- Call her right now with me in the car.
- Nah bro, I'm not, I'm not ready for that, man.
My momma live with me. - What's up with that?
- My momma live with me, one. Right?
- I mean, well, technically, you kinda live with her, so...
- Don't start that shit, bro. - Alright, sorry.
- She live with me. Okay? - Sorry.
- I'm trying to get my life together, man.
I gotta get on my feet first
before I really dive into a relationship.
- Yeah.
- Alright, these women want more.
Like, I ain't got it right now.
- I get it, I get it. You're right.
- You know what I'm saying? - But--
- So, let me spend the night.
- --that doesn't change the fact
that I need my alone time tonight.
So, I'm taking you home.
- Alone time. - Yeah.
- Alone time, that sound like some white shit right there.
Some time out shit.
That's that white side talking.
I need some alone time.
Black people don't say alone time.
- Can you stop with that? Please?
- They just say, "Hey, nigga, you can't come."
You talking about I need my alone time.
Like, who has alone time?
I need my alone time.
- Okay, laugh it up. Laugh it up.
- I get it, bro. That's fine.
If you don't, if you don't want me coming there.
- Hey, listen. That's all I'm asking.
- I got you. - Thanks for understanding.
I appreciate that. - Enjoy your alone time.
- Okay. - Okay?
- No hard feelings. - I got hard feelings.
Fuck you, but I love you. - John.
- No, that's how you just did me.
Like, I love you but fuck you. That's what you just did.
So, it's all good. - John, come on.
- No, it's all good. - No.
- No, no, for real. Real talk.
Enjoy your alone time, okay?
- John, just, we'll do it another night, okay?
You get the stand-up specials, we'll get the popcorn.
We'll have a little sleepover. - Okay, cool.
- We get to lay back to back, ass to ass,
just two men in the same bed.
- Okay, that sound weird, bro.
I ain't saying all-- no ass to ass.
- That's what you said. - I ain't say all that shit.
- Well, that's what you said. - No, you make it weird.
- How are we gonna lay in the bed
if we're not ass to ass?
- First of all, we lay feet to feet, nigga.
- Feet to feet?
Feet to feet is actually worse. - Okay.
- A lot worse. - I don't wanna talk about it.
- ♪
♪
- ♪
- Regina!
- ♪