1 00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:09,050 - That is the sexiest fucking thing I've ever heard. 2 00:00:09,134 --> 00:00:11,678 - You had a one-night stand? - I know. 3 00:00:11,761 --> 00:00:13,680 I've never done anything like that before. 4 00:00:13,763 --> 00:00:15,974 You know those girls that are, like, confident? 5 00:00:16,056 --> 00:00:17,350 - Yeah, I hate them. - Me too. 6 00:00:17,434 --> 00:00:19,644 - I just pretended to be one of them. 7 00:00:19,728 --> 00:00:23,773 Okay, I walked right up to him and decided to be that bitch! 8 00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:25,066 - [squeals] - I don't know. 9 00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:26,276 I still think sex is better 10 00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:27,777 when it's with someone you love, 11 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,362 and it's an expression of your commitment. 12 00:00:29,446 --> 00:00:31,823 Ow, damn it! - That is so boring, Kimberly. 13 00:00:31,906 --> 00:00:34,117 I'm with you, Whitney. Sex is better with strangers. 14 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:37,912 End of story. - That is not what I said. 15 00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:39,038 - [gasps] 16 00:00:41,499 --> 00:00:44,294 - What? - First of all, good morning. 17 00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:46,463 And second of all, where were you last night? 18 00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:49,299 - Oh, my God, she had a one-night stand too! 19 00:00:49,382 --> 00:00:51,092 Fuck, I'm so lame. 20 00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:52,635 - You ditched us last night, 21 00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:54,471 and you ignored 20 texts from Kimberly. 22 00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:56,014 - And I'm on a limited data plan. 23 00:00:56,097 --> 00:00:58,475 - They still have those? - Uh, yeah. They do. 24 00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:00,727 And so, now if someone texts me, what do I do? 25 00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:02,145 I have to respond with an email 26 00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:03,688 or just hope that I run into them. 27 00:01:03,772 --> 00:01:06,608 - Okay, look, I know that we are all roommates, 28 00:01:06,691 --> 00:01:08,318 but that does not mean that I have to tell you 29 00:01:08,401 --> 00:01:10,236 where I'm going and what I'm doing. 30 00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:12,238 Okay, we literally met, like, three days ago. 31 00:01:12,322 --> 00:01:13,907 I don't even remember your last names. 32 00:01:13,990 --> 00:01:16,201 - Well, my last name, it's Finkle--Kimberly Finkle. 33 00:01:16,284 --> 00:01:18,495 And last night, Kimberly Finkle was worried 34 00:01:18,578 --> 00:01:20,663 that Leighton Murray got human-trafficked. 35 00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,373 - Okay, Kim. - What? It happens. 36 00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:24,209 They snatch girls. - Okay. 37 00:01:24,292 --> 00:01:25,960 Okay. You're right. I get it. 38 00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:28,838 I understand that as a pretty, blonde woman, I am a target. 39 00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:31,591 - How did this become a compliment to you? 40 00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:37,680 - From now on, I will tell you when I am not coming home 41 00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:40,558 but no more details beyond that, okay? 42 00:01:40,642 --> 00:01:42,185 - No, I will not agree to that. 43 00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:44,354 I came to college to hear about my roommates' sexploits, 44 00:01:44,437 --> 00:01:46,731 so sit down and tell us who was inside you! 45 00:01:46,815 --> 00:01:47,857 - Ugh! - Bela. 46 00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,108 - No! 47 00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:50,652 - Why am I the only fun one around here? 48 00:01:50,735 --> 00:01:53,655 [upbeat music] 49 00:01:53,738 --> 00:02:00,829 ♪ ♪ 50 00:02:05,792 --> 00:02:08,252 - I'm so excited that classes are finally starting. 51 00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:11,506 - Oh, God, you were, like, valedictorian or some shit. 52 00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:12,966 Weren't you? - I was. 53 00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:16,219 And the salutatorian's GPA wasn't even close. 54 00:02:16,302 --> 00:02:18,763 What classes are you taking? - I literally don't even know. 55 00:02:18,847 --> 00:02:21,558 I just signed up for anything that started with "intro." 56 00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:23,893 Oh, I'm over there. I'll catch you later, okay? 57 00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:25,061 - Bye! - Bye! 58 00:02:25,144 --> 00:02:27,647 - ♪ Live without me ♪ 59 00:02:27,730 --> 00:02:32,151 ♪ You can live without a loss ♪ 60 00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:34,737 ♪ Secretly you're burning through my veins ♪ 61 00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:38,867 ♪ Like an overdose, overdose ♪ 62 00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:41,828 ♪ You're telling me that I can ease the pain ♪ 63 00:02:41,911 --> 00:02:44,414 ♪ With your overdose, overdose ♪ 64 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:46,416 - Oh, hi! Leighton's brother, Nico! 65 00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:48,459 - Hey. 66 00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:51,129 Morning. - Morning. Happy FDOC. 67 00:02:51,212 --> 00:02:52,881 - Huh? - First day of classes. 68 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:55,341 - Oh, right. 69 00:02:55,425 --> 00:02:56,634 - So how was the rest of your night? 70 00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:59,262 - It got kind of nuts. - Nice! 71 00:02:59,345 --> 00:03:01,973 - Yeah, I drank way too much and woke up somewhere 72 00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:04,392 I definitely shouldn't have been. 73 00:03:04,475 --> 00:03:06,227 You know how it goes. - Yeah, for sure. 74 00:03:06,311 --> 00:03:08,605 I'm always doing that. I never wake up in my own bed. 75 00:03:08,688 --> 00:03:10,106 - Oh, shit, 76 00:03:10,189 --> 00:03:12,609 are you taking French Revolution and Romanticism? 77 00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:14,861 - I am! Are you? - No, I did last year. 78 00:03:14,944 --> 00:03:16,571 - Oh. - That class is legit, though. 79 00:03:16,654 --> 00:03:17,947 You must really like French. 80 00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:19,949 - I do. It's kind of my best subject. 81 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,868 In high school, I won a certificate that was signed 82 00:03:21,951 --> 00:03:24,621 by the lieutenant governor of Arizona, no big deal. 83 00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:25,955 - All right. 84 00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:29,417 Well, I'd better go. - Okay. 85 00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:32,170 - Hey, Happy FDOC. 86 00:03:32,253 --> 00:03:33,296 - You remembered! 87 00:03:33,379 --> 00:03:36,299 [pop music] 88 00:03:36,382 --> 00:03:40,595 ♪ ♪ 89 00:03:40,678 --> 00:03:43,097 - ♪ Never took your side ♪ 90 00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:45,808 ♪ Never curse your name ♪ 91 00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:48,519 ♪ I keep my lips shut tight ♪ 92 00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:51,814 - [sighs] - ♪ Until you go ♪ 93 00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:54,275 ♪ We've come as far ♪ 94 00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:56,110 ♪ As we're ever gonna get ♪ 95 00:03:56,194 --> 00:03:59,447 - Hello? - ♪ Go, foxes, go ♪ 96 00:03:59,530 --> 00:04:02,492 ♪ Fight on for Essex ♪ 97 00:04:02,575 --> 00:04:04,744 ♪ Shout it out loud ♪ 98 00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:06,371 - Okay, I'm hanging up. 99 00:04:06,454 --> 00:04:07,830 - My daughter, she goes to Essex! 100 00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:09,165 - Okay, bye. - No, no, no. 101 00:04:09,248 --> 00:04:10,667 Don't hang up. Don't hang up. 102 00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:12,669 How are ya? Are you loving it, or what? 103 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:14,337 - Yeah. I don't know. It's fine. 104 00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:15,755 - What do you mean "fine"? 105 00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:17,548 Honey, it's the first week of college. 106 00:04:17,632 --> 00:04:21,094 It's, like, probably the best seven days of your whole life! 107 00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:22,595 What are you talking about? 108 00:04:22,679 --> 00:04:24,514 Did you make up with Esme and Francesca yet? 109 00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:26,516 - What? No, no, I don't even think about them anymore. 110 00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:29,143 They can live their lives, and I can live mine. 111 00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:31,145 - Well, that's great, honey. I'm glad. 112 00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:34,440 What else? Have you--have you met any cute boys, or what? 113 00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:37,318 - Yeah, a few. I'm actually already pregnant, 114 00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:39,570 and I have no idea who the father is. 115 00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:41,698 - Honey, no, no, no. 116 00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,908 What did we say about that joke? 117 00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,868 It is a joke, right? 118 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:48,037 - Look, I got to go, but I love you, okay? 119 00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:49,372 - Okay. I love you too. 120 00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:50,957 But seriously, you were joking, right? 121 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:52,583 Seriously, please don't get pregnant! 122 00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:54,794 - [vocalizing] 123 00:04:54,877 --> 00:04:57,547 ♪ I'm in misery, but you can't seem ♪ 124 00:04:57,630 --> 00:04:58,798 ♪ As old as your omens ♪ 125 00:04:58,881 --> 00:05:01,384 - Yeah! Aw. - I love it so much. 126 00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:04,512 - ♪ We share never keep your prayer hands ♪ 127 00:05:04,595 --> 00:05:06,723 ♪ From falling ♪ 128 00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:09,308 ♪ ♪ 129 00:05:09,392 --> 00:05:11,894 - Esme, Esme's roommate. 130 00:05:11,978 --> 00:05:14,230 - Leighton, wait. How have you been? 131 00:05:14,313 --> 00:05:16,941 Francesca and I were worried about you. 132 00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:18,401 - I have been amazing. 133 00:05:18,484 --> 00:05:20,319 Actually, my new roommates are phenomenal. 134 00:05:20,403 --> 00:05:21,654 We all get along so well. 135 00:05:21,738 --> 00:05:24,365 - Um, would you like to sit with us? 136 00:05:24,449 --> 00:05:26,242 - Oh, that's so sweet, but actually, 137 00:05:26,325 --> 00:05:28,870 a bunch of new friends I made are saving me a seat. 138 00:05:28,953 --> 00:05:31,789 Hi! Hey. 139 00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:35,293 Yeah, they're so cute, but thank you. 140 00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:38,254 - Well, I am happy you're doing well. 141 00:05:38,337 --> 00:05:39,922 - Same. Same to you. 142 00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:41,716 I'll see you both at graduation? 143 00:05:41,799 --> 00:05:43,009 If you make it! 144 00:05:43,092 --> 00:05:46,471 - Welcome to Math 350. 145 00:05:46,554 --> 00:05:50,933 We're going to start today off with a quick assessment test. 146 00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:52,977 Yay. 147 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:57,982 - All right. Nice pass. Switch it. 148 00:05:58,066 --> 00:06:00,735 Jena to Whitney. Come on. Get clear. 149 00:06:00,818 --> 00:06:01,944 Nice! 150 00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:05,615 - Hey! 151 00:06:05,698 --> 00:06:06,949 - That's you, Jena! That's you! 152 00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:08,618 Go, go, go, go, go! - Over here! 153 00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:10,620 Here, here! 154 00:06:13,414 --> 00:06:16,167 - Oh! Motherfucker! 155 00:06:16,250 --> 00:06:19,712 - Sorry. My bad. 156 00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:21,255 - What the hell kind of a shot was that? 157 00:06:21,339 --> 00:06:22,840 I was open. 158 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:29,222 - You have a fucking wife?! 159 00:06:29,305 --> 00:06:30,723 - Okay, I swear. I was going to tell you. 160 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,433 - When, Dalton? When? When we were fucking 161 00:06:32,517 --> 00:06:34,644 on your sofa, or when we were fucking in your car? 162 00:06:34,727 --> 00:06:36,312 - It's complicated. Michelle and I have been 163 00:06:36,395 --> 00:06:38,439 having problems, and so-- - Oh, you have? 164 00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:40,274 Oh, my God. Is one of you cheating? 165 00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:41,984 - I'm trying to be honest with you right now! 166 00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:44,153 - Oh, you want honesty? Okay, you're a fucking creep. 167 00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,239 I'm a fucking catch. Never speak to me again. 168 00:06:46,322 --> 00:06:47,698 - Whitney, please stop. 169 00:06:47,782 --> 00:06:49,617 Michelle and I haven't slept together in months. 170 00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:51,994 We're barely married anymore, okay? 171 00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:53,663 I think what you and I have is real. 172 00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:55,748 Please don't throw it away because I haven't found 173 00:06:55,832 --> 00:06:57,291 the right time to end things with her. 174 00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,043 - Do whatever you want. You and I are done. 175 00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:00,795 - Will you just not-- - And this better not 176 00:07:00,878 --> 00:07:02,922 affect my playing time! - Okay, okay. 177 00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:06,425 Fuck. 178 00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:09,345 - Bonjour. 179 00:07:09,428 --> 00:07:10,930 - Bonjour. - Bonjour. 180 00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:27,738 [laughter] 181 00:08:37,683 --> 00:08:38,893 - Kimberly. 182 00:08:42,020 --> 00:08:44,774 - I think this class is too advanced for you. 183 00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:46,234 I suggest that you drop it. 184 00:08:46,317 --> 00:08:48,986 - What? But French is my best subject. 185 00:08:49,070 --> 00:08:50,780 I--I know I didn't do great today, 186 00:08:50,863 --> 00:08:52,949 but I can catch up. I'm--I'm sure of it. 187 00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:54,784 - Well, ultimately the decision is yours, 188 00:08:54,867 --> 00:08:57,161 but I promise I am suggesting this 189 00:08:57,245 --> 00:08:59,956 because it is best for you. 190 00:09:00,039 --> 00:09:02,625 You are not ready. 191 00:09:02,708 --> 00:09:05,086 ♪ We give meaning to frivolous things ♪ 192 00:09:05,169 --> 00:09:08,130 ♪ And call them necessary have-to-haves ♪ 193 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:10,591 ♪ Like pricey purses and the latest Benzes ♪ 194 00:09:10,675 --> 00:09:12,134 ♪ And the newest gadgets ♪ 195 00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:13,636 - Welcome to the to the Catullan. 196 00:09:13,719 --> 00:09:15,179 You eight should be proud of yourselves 197 00:09:15,263 --> 00:09:16,806 for making it through the first cut. 198 00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:18,641 You're officially funny. - Or at least marginally 199 00:09:18,724 --> 00:09:20,893 funnier than the unfunny people who we've already cut. 200 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,145 - Hi, Bela Malhotra. I've been working on this piece 201 00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:24,897 where Billie Eilish raps a warranty page 202 00:09:24,981 --> 00:09:26,732 of a printer manual. It goes like this. 203 00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:28,234 - Well, I--I'm sorry. 204 00:09:28,317 --> 00:09:30,319 Were our unspoken rules not clear enough here? 205 00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:31,946 New members aren't allowed to pitch yet. 206 00:09:32,029 --> 00:09:33,364 - For the next six weeks, 207 00:09:33,447 --> 00:09:34,991 you'll be interning as our support staff. 208 00:09:35,074 --> 00:09:36,742 - If I want Bark Thins and a mocha, 209 00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:38,953 you will get me Bark Thins and a mocha. 210 00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:40,329 And don't be cute and try to write 211 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:41,831 a funny name on my cup. You will be cut. 212 00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:44,000 - Uh, I'm confused. Are we not writers? 213 00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:46,335 - Not yet. Those of you who are still around in October 214 00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,296 will submit your final pieces for consideration. 215 00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:50,131 - But, for now, let's celebrate your small, 216 00:09:50,214 --> 00:09:52,550 recent accomplishment and the long, unrelenting road ahead 217 00:09:52,633 --> 00:09:54,427 with a little bit of snacks and chitchat. 218 00:09:57,596 --> 00:10:00,683 [light chatter] 219 00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:07,273 - Hey, uh, Evangeline, can I talk to you for a moment? 220 00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:09,567 - Sure. I'll catch up with you guys later. 221 00:10:09,650 --> 00:10:11,652 - Yeah. - Don't worry about it. 222 00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:15,865 - Hey. I know you and I got off on the wrong foot, and I-- 223 00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:18,284 I don't want things to be weird between us. 224 00:10:18,367 --> 00:10:20,161 I sent you an email, apologizing. 225 00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:21,662 Did you get it? - I did. 226 00:10:21,746 --> 00:10:23,164 I thought I wrote you back. 227 00:10:23,247 --> 00:10:24,915 Oh, maybe it got stuck in my outbox. 228 00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:26,417 It happens. 229 00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:28,502 Ah, yep. It did. 230 00:10:28,586 --> 00:10:29,670 - Okay. 231 00:10:29,754 --> 00:10:31,297 - Here. Just sent it! 232 00:10:32,673 --> 00:10:34,550 [notification chimes] 233 00:10:36,719 --> 00:10:38,554 Did you get it? 234 00:10:38,637 --> 00:10:40,431 - I--I did. - Great. 235 00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:51,650 - Hey, so what did you guys think 236 00:10:51,734 --> 00:10:53,152 of your first day of classes? 237 00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:54,653 Like, was it easier than you expected, 238 00:10:54,737 --> 00:10:56,739 or harder, or, like, way harder? 239 00:10:56,822 --> 00:10:57,823 - Easier. - Easy. 240 00:10:57,907 --> 00:10:59,450 - Easier, not harder? 241 00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:01,243 both: Easier. - Yeah, yeah, I know. 242 00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:03,079 I thought this place was supposed to be hard, 243 00:11:03,162 --> 00:11:05,664 but my public school education definitely prepared me for it, 244 00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:06,916 definitely. 245 00:11:06,999 --> 00:11:08,584 Like, I'm gonna go do my homework, 246 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,461 and I'll probably be done in, like, four seconds. 247 00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:12,755 But, you know, you've just got to laugh, right? 248 00:11:12,838 --> 00:11:14,924 Like, it's just--it's funny. 249 00:11:15,007 --> 00:11:18,469 [laughing, then sobbing] 250 00:11:18,552 --> 00:11:20,846 - Was that weird? - Hmm? 251 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:22,598 Oh, I wasn't really listening. 252 00:11:31,690 --> 00:11:33,901 - Uh, Miss Murray, can I talk to you 253 00:11:33,984 --> 00:11:35,611 about yesterday's assessment test? 254 00:11:35,694 --> 00:11:37,154 - Before you say anything, you should know 255 00:11:37,238 --> 00:11:39,615 that my father did pay for this building. 256 00:11:39,698 --> 00:11:41,409 - Okay. Uh, noted. 257 00:11:41,492 --> 00:11:43,160 What I was going to say is that you got 258 00:11:43,244 --> 00:11:46,247 the highest score in the class. 259 00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:47,623 - Wait, really? 260 00:11:47,706 --> 00:11:49,417 I did the best? - Yeah. 261 00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:52,503 - Wow. I mean, I would have thought everyone did well. 262 00:11:52,586 --> 00:11:54,463 It was so stupid and easy. 263 00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,340 - Mm, okay. Well, that's kind of insulting. 264 00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:59,802 Regardless, you need to be in a much higher-level class. 265 00:11:59,885 --> 00:12:02,263 Also, I want to increase the number of women 266 00:12:02,346 --> 00:12:03,639 in my seminar. 267 00:12:03,722 --> 00:12:06,434 To one. So would you consider moving up? 268 00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:08,144 [light chatter] 269 00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:10,980 - Sure. On one condition. 270 00:12:11,063 --> 00:12:13,232 - Based on yesterday's placement test, 271 00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:16,652 one extraordinary student has been selected 272 00:12:16,735 --> 00:12:18,237 to join my advanced section, 273 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:22,158 and that student is Leighton Murray. 274 00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:25,786 She is a charming and dynamic young woman 275 00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:30,499 who seems like a wonderful friend who you'd hate to lose. 276 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:31,876 Now we know that 277 00:12:31,959 --> 00:12:36,672 she is objectively the smartest person here. 278 00:12:36,755 --> 00:12:38,090 Congrats, Leighton. 279 00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:41,844 Hashtag, on to bigger and better things. 280 00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:43,971 - ♪ Never met a pill I didn't know how to take ♪ 281 00:12:44,054 --> 00:12:45,973 ♪ But that was getting old, I had to give it a break ♪ 282 00:12:46,056 --> 00:12:48,350 ♪ I never met an emotion I didn't know how to fake ♪ 283 00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:51,437 ♪ But now I'm getting older, and I want to be straight ♪ 284 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:54,315 - Hey, Jena. I love those toe shoes. 285 00:12:54,398 --> 00:12:56,066 - Hey, Willow. 286 00:12:56,150 --> 00:12:59,778 - Damn, that look she gave you was true hatred. 287 00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:01,197 I would have cried. 288 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:03,199 - What are you up to tonight? - Nothing. 289 00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:05,451 I'm doing nothing in my apartment, by myself. 290 00:13:05,534 --> 00:13:07,661 - Willow, why are you being weird? 291 00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,079 - I am not being weird. 292 00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:11,707 - You're totally being weird. What's going on? 293 00:13:11,790 --> 00:13:14,460 - I'm going to Jena's house with the rest of the team. 294 00:13:14,543 --> 00:13:17,004 - Are you serious? She invited everyone but me? 295 00:13:17,087 --> 00:13:18,589 - No, no. She did not! 296 00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:20,257 She also didn't invite Brittany. 297 00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:22,927 - Who's Brittany? - She's studying abroad. 298 00:13:23,010 --> 00:13:24,678 Ah, don't worry! 299 00:13:24,762 --> 00:13:28,182 I'll go tonight and talk up how chill you are. 300 00:13:28,265 --> 00:13:29,934 I'll fix this! 301 00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:31,268 - Okay. - Okay. 302 00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:32,520 - Thank you. 303 00:13:34,688 --> 00:13:36,232 - Oh, I don't know, man. 304 00:13:36,315 --> 00:13:37,733 I just thought college would be 305 00:13:37,816 --> 00:13:39,401 a lot more fun and crazy than it's been so far. 306 00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:40,861 - Yeah. - I've been here six days. 307 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:42,154 I've made multiple enemies, 308 00:13:42,238 --> 00:13:43,822 and I've had zero three-way kisses. 309 00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:45,866 - What are you talking about? I mean, two weeks ago, 310 00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:49,703 I was in Ohio, and tonight I'm going to a naked party. 311 00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:51,413 Not many of those in Akron. 312 00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:54,625 - I'm sorry, what? - Oh, Akron is a city in Ohio. 313 00:13:54,708 --> 00:13:57,086 - Bitch, you know that's not the detail that I want! 314 00:13:59,171 --> 00:14:01,549 - Oh, my God, Travis. It's looking so good! 315 00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:03,592 - Yeah. - What is going on in here? 316 00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:04,969 It smells awful. - Ugh! 317 00:14:05,052 --> 00:14:06,637 - Yeah, Travis is contouring my body. 318 00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:08,806 He's using makeup to subtly enhance my banging bod. 319 00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:10,099 It's impressive, right? - Yeah. 320 00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:11,392 Nobody has that many abs. 321 00:14:11,475 --> 00:14:12,935 - Yeah, those lines are way too dark. 322 00:14:13,018 --> 00:14:14,353 All right? You look like xylophone. 323 00:14:14,436 --> 00:14:16,105 - Uh, check yourself. These are 324 00:14:16,188 --> 00:14:18,816 professional-grade tools that I bought gently used on eBay. 325 00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:20,526 - Yeah, but why are you doing this? 326 00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:23,571 - Because I'm going to a naked party! 327 00:14:23,654 --> 00:14:25,322 - Huh? - To a what? 328 00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:27,992 - So you're going to an orgy? - No, no, no. It's not an orgy! 329 00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:30,411 It's a normal party, except with naked people. 330 00:14:30,494 --> 00:14:32,621 And I'm not going to it. We're going to it. 331 00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:33,831 Travis, could you move to my back 332 00:14:33,914 --> 00:14:35,249 while I address my roommates? 333 00:14:35,332 --> 00:14:37,167 I have come up with undeniable reasons 334 00:14:37,251 --> 00:14:39,753 why each of you should join me and party nude. 335 00:14:39,837 --> 00:14:41,755 Leighton, you're first. - You are not 336 00:14:41,839 --> 00:14:43,632 going to convince me to go! I'm going to head out. 337 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:45,342 - Where are you going? - Oh, I'm sorry. 338 00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:46,969 Did I forget to mention where I was going? 339 00:14:47,052 --> 00:14:49,471 Right, I didn't, because it's none of your business. 340 00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:51,056 Bye. 341 00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:52,600 - Savage. 342 00:14:55,477 --> 00:14:57,771 - Whitney Chase. - Yeah, I can't make it. 343 00:14:57,855 --> 00:14:59,440 - Why is everyone opposed to this party? 344 00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:02,234 - Because it sounds weird, Bela! 345 00:15:02,318 --> 00:15:04,987 - Fine. Kimberly, it's just us two. 346 00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:07,031 - Mm-hmm. - Men have objectified 347 00:15:07,114 --> 00:15:09,366 women's bodies for tens, if not hundreds of years. 348 00:15:09,450 --> 00:15:12,077 - Bela, I'm sorry. I can't make time for this. 349 00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:13,370 - Why can't you make time for this? 350 00:15:13,454 --> 00:15:14,997 - I just can't. - Wha--what-- 351 00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:19,877 - Why is there a tan ass-print on our couch? 352 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:23,839 - What you should be asking is, why aren't there four? 353 00:15:26,216 --> 00:15:27,468 - [sighs] 354 00:15:39,313 --> 00:15:41,023 - What? 355 00:15:41,106 --> 00:15:42,232 Ugh. 356 00:15:47,112 --> 00:15:49,907 - God, you're so much hotter than your profile. 357 00:15:49,990 --> 00:15:51,700 It's like a reverse catfish. 358 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:52,826 - Thanks. 359 00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:55,371 - I'm--I'm so sorry. 360 00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:56,664 Does this car seat come out? 361 00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:57,956 It's really digging into my boob. 362 00:15:58,040 --> 00:15:59,291 - Oh, it's, like, a whole thing 363 00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:01,001 to remove it, you know-- - It's fine. 364 00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:02,169 Let's just-- 365 00:16:05,255 --> 00:16:08,676 - Hey, do you go to Essex? 366 00:16:08,759 --> 00:16:10,052 - How--how did you know that? 367 00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:11,887 - Uh, your keychain? 368 00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:15,891 What's wrong? 369 00:16:15,974 --> 00:16:18,936 Are you not out? - No, I'm--[scoffs] 370 00:16:19,019 --> 00:16:20,646 I'm sorry. How is that any of your business? 371 00:16:20,729 --> 00:16:22,606 - I didn't mean anything by it. I'm just surprised. 372 00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,233 In fact, kids your age came out when they're, 373 00:16:24,316 --> 00:16:26,360 like, six years old. Isn't it cool to be gay now? 374 00:16:26,443 --> 00:16:28,570 - Oh, my God. 375 00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:30,239 - Did I upset you? - Uh, no. 376 00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:33,826 No, it's just you have no idea what you are talking about. 377 00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:37,121 When did you come out? - In high school. 378 00:16:37,204 --> 00:16:39,498 - So for someone like you, I'm sure coming out 379 00:16:39,581 --> 00:16:41,041 probably made you more interesting, 380 00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:42,793 but, for me, I was popular, 381 00:16:42,876 --> 00:16:44,670 so I actually have something to lose. 382 00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:48,507 - It's hard to find the courage to come out, but it's worth it. 383 00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:49,925 - Maybe for you. 384 00:16:50,008 --> 00:16:51,927 I don't want being gay to be my identity. 385 00:16:52,010 --> 00:16:53,595 I like my identity. I don't want to be 386 00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,931 the gay Kappa girl or the lesbian cousin. 387 00:16:56,014 --> 00:16:58,392 I don't--I don't want to be other, okay? 388 00:16:58,475 --> 00:17:00,018 I just want to be me. - Mm. 389 00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:02,980 By hiding who you are? - No, I'm-- 390 00:17:03,063 --> 00:17:04,732 I came here to hook up, not to be lectured 391 00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:07,151 by some suburban mom in a bad cardigan. 392 00:17:07,233 --> 00:17:10,279 - Uh, excuse you. I'm just trying to help. 393 00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:17,202 - Hello, Kimberly. - I bought this tea at a store. 394 00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:18,829 I don't have a hot plate. - It's okay. 395 00:17:18,912 --> 00:17:21,623 I was just doing my Friday night sweep, 396 00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:23,000 looking for opioids. 397 00:17:23,083 --> 00:17:25,377 I didn't expect anyone to be here. 398 00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:28,464 - Oh, I'm taking advantage of the quiet to study. 399 00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:31,467 - On a Friday night? You should be out with friends. 400 00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:33,802 - Uh, it's okay. I'll go out another night. 401 00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:36,472 - Kimberly, the first week of school 402 00:17:36,555 --> 00:17:38,307 is when people find their friends. 403 00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:42,478 My first weekend, I skipped the Swedish mid-September party. 404 00:17:42,561 --> 00:17:44,521 That was when they found the inside joke 405 00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:47,149 they would be utilizing for the next four years, 406 00:17:47,232 --> 00:17:50,736 and I still don't know who Radish Face is. 407 00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:54,114 I fear it may be me. 408 00:17:54,198 --> 00:17:56,533 - Well, I can't be the only one staying in today. 409 00:17:56,617 --> 00:17:59,244 - Believe you are. Well, if you get lonely 410 00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:00,662 or have dark thoughts, 411 00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:03,040 come over and we can play a board game. 412 00:18:03,123 --> 00:18:07,211 It is my job to be available for...people like you. 413 00:18:13,133 --> 00:18:16,386 - Wait for me! I'm coming! 414 00:18:16,470 --> 00:18:18,180 I deserve to have some fun. 415 00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,974 - Whoo! Yes, let's go! - Yes! 416 00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:23,268 Yo, we're gonna see each other's tits tonight. 417 00:18:25,103 --> 00:18:28,190 [chatter] 418 00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:39,451 - Yes! Remember? 419 00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:41,453 - What's up, bitches? 420 00:18:43,288 --> 00:18:44,623 - What are you doing here? 421 00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:47,042 - I realized I'm not just gonna sit at home 422 00:18:47,125 --> 00:18:49,378 because one girl doesn't want me here for no reason. 423 00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:51,296 - There is a reason: she doesn't like you. 424 00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:54,716 - Well, she is definitely gonna like me after I give her this. 425 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:57,010 - A basket of lavender soaps and hand creams? 426 00:18:57,094 --> 00:18:59,388 She's the co-captain of the team, not your great-aunt. 427 00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:01,640 - This is nice! It has bath crystals in it. 428 00:19:01,723 --> 00:19:03,100 - Mm-mm. - Whatever, okay? 429 00:19:03,183 --> 00:19:05,811 I'm gonna go find Jena, make her my best friend, 430 00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:08,480 and replace you. - I'm your best friend? 431 00:19:08,564 --> 00:19:10,232 You've known me for, like, four weeks. 432 00:19:13,151 --> 00:19:14,695 Tragic. 433 00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:19,825 - I said I was sorry. I don't make the schedule! 434 00:19:19,908 --> 00:19:21,410 - It's like I don't even have a girlfriend. 435 00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:23,453 I'm done. - Stop. Don't do this, Jason! 436 00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:26,248 What the fuck? Why are you in my room?! 437 00:19:26,331 --> 00:19:28,542 - I brought you some soaps. 438 00:19:30,419 --> 00:19:33,380 [muffled pop music] 439 00:19:33,463 --> 00:19:38,594 ♪ ♪ 440 00:19:38,677 --> 00:19:40,554 - So how does this work? 441 00:19:40,637 --> 00:19:43,432 Do we just take our clothes off and go inside? 442 00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:44,558 - I guess. 443 00:19:57,112 --> 00:19:59,406 - This just got so real, so quick. 444 00:19:59,489 --> 00:20:00,949 I don't think I can do this. 445 00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:03,577 - Fuck it. I'm going in! 446 00:20:03,660 --> 00:20:05,120 - Oh, my God, Jocelyn. 447 00:20:05,203 --> 00:20:07,998 You have, like, perfect Keira Knightley boobs. 448 00:20:08,081 --> 00:20:11,084 - Well, I'll see you inside? 449 00:20:15,005 --> 00:20:16,048 - Whew. 450 00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:20,677 - Well... 451 00:20:20,761 --> 00:20:23,805 - Same time? - Same time. 452 00:20:35,692 --> 00:20:37,486 - Okay. - Okay. 453 00:20:37,569 --> 00:20:38,904 - Let's go! - Let's go! 454 00:20:38,987 --> 00:20:42,074 [laughter] 455 00:20:44,242 --> 00:20:46,411 - No, he went down the way! - He went down the whole way. 456 00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:47,704 - Holy-- - Whoa, whoa, whoa. 457 00:20:47,788 --> 00:20:49,498 Guys, stop. Hey, Leighton. 458 00:20:49,581 --> 00:20:51,458 - Oh, hey. - What's up? 459 00:20:51,541 --> 00:20:54,336 Are you, like, alone? - Yeah. 460 00:20:54,419 --> 00:20:57,422 - But it's a Friday night. - Yeah, I know it's Friday. 461 00:20:57,506 --> 00:20:59,174 Maybe I'm going somewhere really fun. 462 00:20:59,257 --> 00:21:01,843 - Are you? - No. 463 00:21:01,927 --> 00:21:04,137 - Look, Leight, just because those girls 464 00:21:04,221 --> 00:21:07,099 don't want to live with you doesn't make you a loser. 465 00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:09,434 - Yo, what they did was not cool. 466 00:21:09,518 --> 00:21:12,145 - You told them? - Well, yeah. Of course I did. 467 00:21:12,229 --> 00:21:13,897 I mean, that was really fucked up. 468 00:21:13,981 --> 00:21:18,026 - Yeah, for what it's worth, we all felt so bad for you. 469 00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:20,320 - Okay. Well, this was horrible, 470 00:21:20,404 --> 00:21:22,656 and I am, uh, I'm going to go drink 471 00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:24,741 until I forget this conversation ever happened. 472 00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,201 - Leighton, Leighton. 473 00:21:26,284 --> 00:21:27,995 You're gonna make friends soon. I know it. 474 00:21:28,078 --> 00:21:30,247 - Everything you're saying is making it worse. Thank you. 475 00:21:30,330 --> 00:21:32,457 - Damn, she must be really hurting. 476 00:21:32,541 --> 00:21:34,292 Want to go throw knives at trees? 477 00:21:34,376 --> 00:21:35,377 - Yep. - Let's fucking go. 478 00:21:35,460 --> 00:21:37,379 - Let's go! - Yahoo! 479 00:21:37,462 --> 00:21:39,172 - ♪ The day you took my voice ♪ 480 00:21:39,256 --> 00:21:41,425 ♪ The power of my melodies ♪ 481 00:21:41,508 --> 00:21:44,553 ♪ I knew that this was the day ♪ 482 00:21:44,636 --> 00:21:46,013 ♪ And then you took my voice ♪ 483 00:21:46,096 --> 00:21:47,723 - Okay, I don't think you realize it, 484 00:21:47,806 --> 00:21:50,934 but you're aggressively cupping your breasts in shame. 485 00:21:51,018 --> 00:21:53,895 - Yes. You're right. I am doing that. 486 00:21:53,979 --> 00:21:57,733 I'm fixing it now. Here we go. 487 00:21:57,816 --> 00:21:59,484 Ah! 488 00:21:59,568 --> 00:22:01,278 - I'm proud of you. 489 00:22:01,361 --> 00:22:03,405 Ready to mingle? - Yeah. 490 00:22:03,488 --> 00:22:05,532 Which group of butts looks more approachable: 491 00:22:05,615 --> 00:22:07,409 the right or the left? 492 00:22:07,492 --> 00:22:09,077 - The right butts look kinder, 493 00:22:09,161 --> 00:22:10,620 but I don't know what I'm basing that on. 494 00:22:10,704 --> 00:22:12,748 - Yeah, no, I agree. Right butts, for sure. 495 00:22:12,831 --> 00:22:14,624 - Uh-huh. - Let's go. 496 00:22:16,334 --> 00:22:18,128 - Hey, Emma is on the lit mag? 497 00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:20,714 - Hello, everybody! 498 00:22:20,797 --> 00:22:23,884 - So embarrassing that we all wore the same outfit, right? 499 00:22:23,967 --> 00:22:25,427 - Is this your first naked party? 500 00:22:25,510 --> 00:22:27,929 - No. Why would you say that? 501 00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:31,016 - Because you looked down at everyone's junk multiple times. 502 00:22:31,099 --> 00:22:33,602 - Naked parties are about being comfortable in your skin, 503 00:22:33,685 --> 00:22:35,187 not objectifying and catching a peek. 504 00:22:35,270 --> 00:22:38,440 - Oh, no doubt. No doubt. I know that. 505 00:22:38,523 --> 00:22:40,400 I just looked down again, didn't I? 506 00:22:40,484 --> 00:22:41,651 - Yeah. - Mm-hmm. 507 00:22:44,529 --> 00:22:46,073 - So we're not even supposed to look? 508 00:22:46,156 --> 00:22:48,617 What is this, a naked party under Taliban rule? 509 00:22:48,700 --> 00:22:51,620 - Why are you two hanging out alone like a bunch of creeps? 510 00:22:51,703 --> 00:22:53,163 People think you're cops. 511 00:22:53,246 --> 00:22:54,915 - [gasps] - Maybe we should just go. 512 00:22:54,998 --> 00:22:57,084 I thought this would be the amazing, unforgettable party 513 00:22:57,167 --> 00:23:00,796 I've been waiting for, but that's obviously not the case. 514 00:23:00,879 --> 00:23:02,631 - No, we are gonna stay, 515 00:23:02,714 --> 00:23:04,674 and we are gonna make the most of it together. 516 00:23:04,758 --> 00:23:07,135 Jocelyn, you seem so comfortable. 517 00:23:07,219 --> 00:23:08,595 How can we be more like you? 518 00:23:08,678 --> 00:23:11,640 - I pregamed a lot, so I'm crazy drunk. 519 00:23:11,723 --> 00:23:13,892 - Okay. - [snorts] 520 00:23:13,975 --> 00:23:15,477 Here we go. Oh. 521 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:18,313 - ♪ That's the way we get down, down ♪ 522 00:23:18,396 --> 00:23:19,898 ♪ Turn it up, turn it up ♪ 523 00:23:19,981 --> 00:23:22,901 ♪ That's the way we get down, down ♪ 524 00:23:22,984 --> 00:23:23,985 ♪ Turn it up, turn it up ♪ 525 00:23:24,069 --> 00:23:27,364 [loud laughter] 526 00:23:27,447 --> 00:23:30,659 - Okay. Well, there's a gift receipt in the basket. 527 00:23:30,742 --> 00:23:32,619 You have 14 days. 528 00:23:34,830 --> 00:23:36,164 Are you okay? 529 00:23:36,248 --> 00:23:38,041 - My fucking boyfriend just broke up with me. 530 00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:39,292 - Okay. 531 00:23:39,376 --> 00:23:41,294 - He can't handle our soccer schedule. 532 00:23:41,378 --> 00:23:43,964 He says I'm never around, like my life should revolve 533 00:23:44,047 --> 00:23:45,632 around hanging out in his frat basement 534 00:23:45,715 --> 00:23:47,759 while he and his friends flick each other in the nuts. 535 00:23:47,843 --> 00:23:49,302 - Sounds like a real winner. 536 00:23:49,386 --> 00:23:51,721 - You don't fucking know him. His dog just died. 537 00:23:51,805 --> 00:23:54,224 - I should not have said that. 538 00:23:54,307 --> 00:23:57,561 - It's okay. He does suck. 539 00:23:57,644 --> 00:24:01,189 It's just, not like guys are lining up for me, so-- 540 00:24:01,273 --> 00:24:03,275 - Jena, what? You're so pretty. 541 00:24:03,358 --> 00:24:04,985 - Oh, fuck you. - You are! 542 00:24:05,068 --> 00:24:06,319 You're tall, you're ripped, 543 00:24:06,403 --> 00:24:08,488 and you're, like, so good at soccer. 544 00:24:08,572 --> 00:24:10,490 That's why it kills me that you don't like me. 545 00:24:10,574 --> 00:24:12,868 So, look, if this guy doesn't get that, fuck him. 546 00:24:12,951 --> 00:24:17,038 Move on. There's plenty of guys out there. 547 00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:19,749 - Thanks. 548 00:24:19,833 --> 00:24:21,376 - So are we good now? 549 00:24:21,459 --> 00:24:23,587 'Cause I'd love it if you stopped kicking the shit 550 00:24:23,670 --> 00:24:25,547 out of me on the field. 551 00:24:25,630 --> 00:24:27,883 - Yeah, we're good. 552 00:24:27,966 --> 00:24:29,551 But you're wrong about one thing: 553 00:24:29,634 --> 00:24:30,886 There aren't many guys our age 554 00:24:30,969 --> 00:24:32,679 who can handle being with girls like us, 555 00:24:32,762 --> 00:24:35,223 so good luck finding one. 556 00:24:39,144 --> 00:24:42,105 - I mean, come on. It's a naked party! 557 00:24:42,189 --> 00:24:43,565 Everybody looks at everybody. 558 00:24:43,648 --> 00:24:45,984 You just can't look like you're looking. 559 00:24:46,067 --> 00:24:49,196 Like, right now, I just glanced at your boobs three times. 560 00:24:49,279 --> 00:24:51,281 - No, you did not! You were looking at my eyes. 561 00:24:51,364 --> 00:24:54,576 - I micro-glanced. The left one is bigger. 562 00:24:54,659 --> 00:24:57,787 - Holy hell, she's right. Your left one is bigger. 563 00:24:57,871 --> 00:25:01,917 - Hey, do any of you know where a girl named Sarah is? 564 00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:03,585 - No. - Sorry. 565 00:25:03,668 --> 00:25:05,670 - I don't. 566 00:25:05,754 --> 00:25:07,714 - Did you see that? - Wow! 567 00:25:07,797 --> 00:25:08,965 - Micro-glance! 568 00:25:09,049 --> 00:25:10,592 [laughter] 569 00:25:10,675 --> 00:25:12,385 - I'm gonna get a drink. 570 00:25:18,642 --> 00:25:19,935 - What the hell?! 571 00:25:20,018 --> 00:25:23,438 Ugh, of course it's you. - You know what? No. 572 00:25:23,521 --> 00:25:25,941 - You spilled my drink. - And I'm sorry about that, 573 00:25:26,024 --> 00:25:27,442 but I already know where this is going. 574 00:25:27,525 --> 00:25:28,818 You're gonna say something mean to me 575 00:25:28,902 --> 00:25:30,237 and make me feel bad about myself. 576 00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:31,613 I'm a good person! 577 00:25:31,696 --> 00:25:33,990 Did I jerk your boyfriend's dick? I did! 578 00:25:34,074 --> 00:25:35,450 But if I knew he had a girlfriend, 579 00:25:35,533 --> 00:25:36,952 I wouldn't have done it. 580 00:25:37,035 --> 00:25:38,787 Please stop being mean to me. 581 00:25:38,870 --> 00:25:41,206 I'm sorry! 582 00:25:41,289 --> 00:25:42,582 - Come over here. 583 00:25:45,961 --> 00:25:48,630 I know I've been... less than kind. 584 00:25:48,713 --> 00:25:51,925 It's because I fought super hard for you in the first cut. 585 00:25:52,008 --> 00:25:53,468 Staff was split about your submission, 586 00:25:53,551 --> 00:25:55,178 and people preferred this guy, 587 00:25:55,262 --> 00:25:58,556 but I thought your stuff was funny, so I pushed for you, 588 00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:00,141 which then made me look like an idiot 589 00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:02,018 when everyone found out that the girl I supported 590 00:26:02,102 --> 00:26:04,604 had a jack-fest with my boyf the night before. 591 00:26:04,688 --> 00:26:05,981 - You liked my submission? 592 00:26:06,064 --> 00:26:08,358 - It was pretty solid. - Pretty solid? 593 00:26:08,441 --> 00:26:10,568 - You're a first-year. Take it easy. 594 00:26:10,652 --> 00:26:14,197 - So, wait, can we just please be good now? 595 00:26:14,281 --> 00:26:16,199 I don't want you to hate me. 596 00:26:16,283 --> 00:26:17,867 - Yeah, we can be good. 597 00:26:17,951 --> 00:26:20,912 - I think I need to hug you. - Oh! 598 00:26:23,581 --> 00:26:25,625 - Oh, jeez, my abs rubbed off on you. 599 00:26:25,709 --> 00:26:27,669 - Mm, my boob contour got on you too. 600 00:26:27,752 --> 00:26:29,671 - Ah! We both contoured?! 601 00:26:29,754 --> 00:26:31,464 I love us! 602 00:26:40,307 --> 00:26:42,684 - Hey. - Hey. 603 00:26:44,894 --> 00:26:46,062 - This will be quick. 604 00:26:46,146 --> 00:26:48,648 - Oh, shit. You're wasted. 605 00:26:48,732 --> 00:26:52,402 - Nico, at the naked party, I had an epiphany. 606 00:26:52,485 --> 00:26:57,324 You are going to French tutor me... 607 00:26:57,407 --> 00:26:58,992 in French, please. 608 00:26:59,075 --> 00:27:01,745 - You're asking me to tutor you at 1:00 in the morning? 609 00:27:01,828 --> 00:27:02,912 - Mm-hmm. 610 00:27:02,996 --> 00:27:04,748 - [chuckles] 611 00:27:04,831 --> 00:27:06,875 Sure, I'll tutor you. 612 00:27:06,958 --> 00:27:11,171 - Oh, excellent, and I appreciate. 613 00:27:11,254 --> 00:27:13,548 Good night. 614 00:27:13,631 --> 00:27:15,717 - That's it? - That'll be all, Tutor. 615 00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:18,053 Thank you! 616 00:27:18,136 --> 00:27:19,512 - What? 617 00:27:29,105 --> 00:27:31,566 - Hello, John. Your hat looks stupid, 618 00:27:31,649 --> 00:27:34,569 and the school you founded sucks. 619 00:27:34,652 --> 00:27:37,906 But I'm sorry you died in the snow. 620 00:27:37,989 --> 00:27:40,241 [phone buzzes] 621 00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:41,409 Hello? 622 00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:43,161 - Hey, it's Chloe. - Who? 623 00:27:43,244 --> 00:27:45,580 - You had my nipples in your mouth in a minivan today? 624 00:27:45,663 --> 00:27:47,165 - What do you want? 625 00:27:47,248 --> 00:27:49,334 Look, did you not sufficiently lecture me in your car? 626 00:27:49,417 --> 00:27:51,086 - I'm just calling to check in on you. 627 00:27:51,169 --> 00:27:52,921 I could tell you're in a really bad place 628 00:27:53,004 --> 00:27:54,672 and just wanted to say that, 629 00:27:54,756 --> 00:27:56,383 it gets better. 630 00:27:56,466 --> 00:27:58,468 - Oh, my God. Are you fucking serious? 631 00:27:58,551 --> 00:28:00,512 You're "It Gets Better-ing" me? 632 00:28:00,595 --> 00:28:02,013 Yeah, no, I am fine. 633 00:28:02,097 --> 00:28:05,350 You drive a Ford Windstar. You get better, hmm? 634 00:28:05,433 --> 00:28:06,893 My--my life is great. 635 00:28:06,976 --> 00:28:08,686 Why is everyone fucking pitying me? 636 00:28:08,770 --> 00:28:10,021 Have you seen me? 637 00:28:10,105 --> 00:28:12,357 I'm smart, stylish and as it turns out, 638 00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:13,858 I'm really fucking good at math. 639 00:28:13,942 --> 00:28:15,318 I'm thriving! 640 00:28:15,402 --> 00:28:17,404 - But you're living a lie. - Yeah, I know! 641 00:28:17,487 --> 00:28:20,782 You don't think I fucking know that?! 642 00:28:20,865 --> 00:28:23,284 [groans] 643 00:28:23,368 --> 00:28:25,954 I'm thriving! [growls] 644 00:28:26,037 --> 00:28:27,956 [sirens blare] - Stop right there! 645 00:28:28,039 --> 00:28:29,958 Don't move! - Fuck! 646 00:28:30,041 --> 00:28:32,293 - Hey, I said stop! 647 00:28:32,377 --> 00:28:34,838 Go around, go around! Stop running! 648 00:28:34,921 --> 00:28:37,966 - ♪ I could stand out here and tell myself I wasn't ready ♪ 649 00:28:38,049 --> 00:28:39,843 ♪ I'll get a million-dollar deal ♪ 650 00:28:39,926 --> 00:28:41,636 ♪ They both are really heavy ♪ 651 00:28:41,719 --> 00:28:43,763 ♪ Making plans that slip right through my hands ♪ 652 00:28:43,847 --> 00:28:45,306 ♪ Just like confetti ♪ 653 00:28:45,390 --> 00:28:48,435 ♪ ♪ 654 00:28:48,518 --> 00:28:51,563 ♪ We could get together, make a baby if you're ready ♪ 655 00:28:51,646 --> 00:28:53,273 ♪ Pretend I'm nothing special ♪ 656 00:28:53,356 --> 00:28:55,275 ♪ Yeah, they both are really heavy ♪ 657 00:28:55,358 --> 00:28:57,485 ♪ Making plans that slip right through my hands ♪ 658 00:28:57,569 --> 00:28:58,903 ♪ Just like confetti ♪ 659 00:28:58,987 --> 00:29:06,077 ♪ ♪ 660 00:29:08,204 --> 00:29:09,330 ♪ Ooh, baby ♪ 661 00:29:09,414 --> 00:29:12,542 ♪ ♪ 662 00:29:12,625 --> 00:29:14,377 ♪ Are you a girl? ♪ 663 00:29:14,461 --> 00:29:16,212 ♪ ♪ 664 00:29:16,296 --> 00:29:17,964 ♪ Are you a boy? ♪ 665 00:29:18,047 --> 00:29:19,674 ♪ ♪ 666 00:29:19,757 --> 00:29:21,176 ♪ I'm not your girl ♪ 667 00:29:21,259 --> 00:29:23,094 ♪ ♪ 668 00:29:23,178 --> 00:29:25,680 ♪ I'm not your boy ♪ 669 00:29:25,763 --> 00:29:27,390 ♪ Freak, I could stand out here ♪ 670 00:29:27,474 --> 00:29:29,476 ♪ And tell myself I wasn't ready ♪ 671 00:29:29,559 --> 00:29:31,227 ♪ I'll get a million-dollar deal ♪ 672 00:29:31,311 --> 00:29:33,188 ♪ They both are really heavy ♪ 673 00:29:33,271 --> 00:29:36,608 ♪ Can you love somebody with a mind full of confetti? ♪ 674 00:29:36,691 --> 00:29:39,110 ♪ ♪ 675 00:29:39,194 --> 00:29:41,237 ♪ Daddy, we could get together ♪ 676 00:29:41,321 --> 00:29:43,031 ♪ Make a baby if you're ready ♪ 677 00:29:43,114 --> 00:29:44,699 ♪ Pretend I'm nothing special ♪ 678 00:29:44,782 --> 00:29:46,784 ♪ Yeah, they both are really heavy ♪ 679 00:29:46,868 --> 00:29:48,912 ♪ Making plans that slip right through my hands ♪