1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:09,208
‎NETFLIX 影集

2
00:00:09,750 --> 00:00:11,125
‎（人資部：我們管理人類）

3
00:00:11,208 --> 00:00:13,958
‎歡迎來到人資部

4
00:00:14,041 --> 00:00:19,291
‎身為第一流人際關係組織的新員工

5
00:00:19,375 --> 00:00:23,333
‎你即將踏上一段奇妙冒險

6
00:00:23,416 --> 00:00:26,958
‎地球生活有時候非常複雜

7
00:00:27,041 --> 00:00:30,291
‎所以人們才需要我們

8
00:00:30,791 --> 00:00:34,916
‎你會由管子分發給人類客戶

9
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,875
‎我分發到麥克彭博？

10
00:00:36,958 --> 00:00:37,791
‎好喔

11
00:00:37,875 --> 00:00:42,375
‎你會有機會和很多部門的生物共事

12
00:00:42,458 --> 00:00:45,416
‎你的隊伍成員有荷爾蒙男怪

13
00:00:46,083 --> 00:00:49,791
‎太勁爆了，而且她還沒用道具耶

14
00:00:49,875 --> 00:00:50,708
‎愧感巫師

15
00:00:50,791 --> 00:00:54,833
‎你太太傳訊要你去接女兒放學

16
00:00:54,916 --> 00:00:56,291
‎要我回覆嗎？

17
00:00:56,375 --> 00:00:57,333
‎愛蟲

18
00:00:57,416 --> 00:00:58,750
‎我的老天爺啊

19
00:00:58,833 --> 00:01:02,541
‎畢生摯愛在艾菲爾鐵塔下向妳求婚耶

20
00:01:02,625 --> 00:01:03,791
‎憂鬱凱蒂貓

21
00:01:03,875 --> 00:01:07,083
‎寶貝，李奧納多狄卡皮歐打電話來

22
00:01:07,166 --> 00:01:09,625
‎他要把血鑽石討回去

23
00:01:09,708 --> 00:01:11,166
‎邏輯石像

24
00:01:11,250 --> 00:01:13,875
‎傑瑞米，現在還沒站起來的理由

25
00:01:13,958 --> 00:01:16,041
‎我保證你一定會下飛機

26
00:01:16,125 --> 00:01:18,416
‎其餘不一一贅述

27
00:01:18,500 --> 00:01:22,833
‎你們都是讓人類發揮本色
‎所不可或缺的員工

28
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:28,125
‎千年以來全天候無休

29
00:01:28,875 --> 00:01:32,083
‎這裡是人資部

30
00:01:32,666 --> 00:01:33,875
‎有問題嗎？

31
00:01:33,958 --> 00:01:35,250
‎我想問先清楚

32
00:01:35,333 --> 00:01:37,458
‎這個節目會很類似《青春無密語》？

33
00:01:37,541 --> 00:01:40,708
‎我們是打算弄成
‎《青春無密語》加《我們的辦公室》

34
00:01:40,791 --> 00:01:42,083
‎那我也會想看

35
00:01:42,166 --> 00:01:45,708
‎老二風車先生，全部就靠你囉

36
00:02:23,833 --> 00:02:25,041
‎老喬，我有跟你說過

37
00:02:25,125 --> 00:02:27,291
‎我老婆現在整天在搞能量功嗎？

38
00:02:27,375 --> 00:02:28,291
‎有沒有搞錯喔

39
00:02:28,375 --> 00:02:29,208
‎就是說啊

40
00:02:29,291 --> 00:02:31,958
‎她說我的“心輪”塞住了

41
00:02:32,041 --> 00:02:33,166
‎誰知道那什麼鬼意思

42
00:02:33,250 --> 00:02:36,916
‎就不能讓我好好看一場曲屌球嗎？

43
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:39,166
‎-昨晚有一場比賽
‎-兩位早安

44
00:02:39,250 --> 00:02:42,958
‎小莫，你有聽過
‎人類最近很愛的VR性愛程式嗎？

45
00:02:43,041 --> 00:02:46,708
‎看巨乳倒奶女僕的油畫
‎打手槍不是很好嗎？

46
00:02:46,791 --> 00:02:48,708
‎那些往日還真美好

47
00:02:48,791 --> 00:02:51,083
‎再過20年，就沒人要幹炮了

48
00:02:51,166 --> 00:02:54,958
‎女人發現按摩棒的用途時
‎你們也講了一樣的話

49
00:02:55,041 --> 00:02:58,250
‎說不定喔，我家那口子就不幹了

50
00:02:59,083 --> 00:03:02,125
‎小莫，你生日想要哪種蛋糕？

51
00:03:02,208 --> 00:03:04,416
‎什麼？我的生日還沒到啦

52
00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:07,041
‎日曆上有寫，你別裝模作樣

53
00:03:07,125 --> 00:03:11,291
‎我們幹嘛跟小朋友一樣吃生日點心？

54
00:03:11,375 --> 00:03:13,666
‎我這麼貼心還真不好意思喔

55
00:03:13,750 --> 00:03:15,958
‎我真賤，竟然敢幫你買蛋糕

56
00:03:16,041 --> 00:03:18,083
‎我他媽痛恨這份工作

57
00:03:18,166 --> 00:03:22,666
‎貝卡，妳最後一個月恐怕得臥床待產

58
00:03:22,750 --> 00:03:23,750
‎你他媽做夢

59
00:03:23,833 --> 00:03:25,291
‎-妳說什麼？
‎-寶貝…

60
00:03:25,375 --> 00:03:27,166
‎我禮拜一要出庭言詞辯論

61
00:03:27,250 --> 00:03:30,291
‎我寧願把嬰兒噴在陪審團臉上
‎也不能錯過庭期

62
00:03:30,375 --> 00:03:33,000
‎-她是說真的，醫生
‎-給我其他選項

63
00:03:33,083 --> 00:03:34,541
‎沒有其他選項

64
00:03:34,625 --> 00:03:36,708
‎我們必須確保妳的羊水不會提早破

65
00:03:36,791 --> 00:03:39,250
‎糟糕，如果嬰兒不幸早夭怎麼辦？

66
00:03:39,333 --> 00:03:41,458
‎或者生下來是尖頭寶寶

67
00:03:41,541 --> 00:03:43,041
‎以後只能戴聖誕帽呢？

68
00:03:43,125 --> 00:03:44,791
‎悲慘的一生

69
00:03:44,875 --> 00:03:46,833
‎不好意思，我要發言

70
00:03:46,916 --> 00:03:49,916
‎姑且不提蒂托的聖誕帽癖

71
00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:51,625
‎這實在是一件大事

72
00:03:51,708 --> 00:03:53,666
‎就是說啊，我就是這個意思

73
00:03:53,750 --> 00:03:56,333
‎從上進的角度考量

74
00:03:56,416 --> 00:04:00,125
‎貝卡躺在床上是要怎麼升合夥律師？

75
00:04:00,208 --> 00:04:02,291
‎這在邏輯上說不通

76
00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:04,333
‎她的家族並沒有高血壓病史

77
00:04:04,416 --> 00:04:05,875
‎誰管這種事啊？

78
00:04:05,958 --> 00:04:07,875
‎等她的鮑魚被嬰兒搞得一團糟

79
00:04:07,958 --> 00:04:11,541
‎他們就再也不會幹炮了

80
00:04:11,625 --> 00:04:14,291
‎康妮，妳先別激動

81
00:04:14,375 --> 00:04:16,541
‎艾咪，妳都記錄下來了吧？

82
00:04:16,625 --> 00:04:19,000
‎是，一清二楚

83
00:04:19,083 --> 00:04:21,583
‎“鮑魚一團糟”，記好了

84
00:04:21,666 --> 00:04:23,791
‎別擔心，康妮，他們還是會做愛

85
00:04:23,875 --> 00:04:25,958
‎只是頻率和滿意度都會不如以往

86
00:04:26,041 --> 00:04:28,416
‎況且和貝瑞做愛本來就不舒服

87
00:04:28,500 --> 00:04:30,166
‎而且也沒有多頻繁，對吧？

88
00:04:30,250 --> 00:04:34,166
‎“我是貝瑞，我要去了都會先宣告

89
00:04:34,250 --> 00:04:37,958
‎我要去了，我是貝瑞”

90
00:04:38,875 --> 00:04:42,375
‎妳模仿的貝瑞還比貝瑞本人討喜

91
00:04:42,458 --> 00:04:43,625
‎貝瑞好無趣

92
00:04:43,708 --> 00:04:46,541
‎別說了，貝卡愛貝瑞

93
00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:50,791
‎她也會愛這個寶寶，因為我很盡責

94
00:04:50,875 --> 00:04:53,375
‎我要你們一起參與

95
00:04:53,458 --> 00:04:54,291
‎沒問題

96
00:04:54,375 --> 00:04:56,916
‎就是說不能再打搏擊，也不能工作

97
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:58,958
‎佩特拉，聽到就點頭

98
00:04:59,041 --> 00:05:00,041
‎知道了啦

99
00:05:00,125 --> 00:05:03,291
‎但她嬌嫩的子宮還是能審閱案件摘要

100
00:05:03,375 --> 00:05:05,875
‎動動眼珠應該可以吧？

101
00:05:06,958 --> 00:05:10,208
‎艾咪，我就對妳直說了

102
00:05:10,291 --> 00:05:13,666
‎妳做的紀錄很爛，還花時間仿傚…

103
00:05:13,750 --> 00:05:15,958
‎-是模仿
‎-做問卷調查

104
00:05:16,041 --> 00:05:19,083
‎可是大家都喜歡我的“二選一”板

105
00:05:19,166 --> 00:05:20,583
‎這是他們來上班的動力

106
00:05:20,666 --> 00:05:23,125
‎上班本身就該是動力了

107
00:05:23,208 --> 00:05:24,666
‎可惜並不是

108
00:05:24,750 --> 00:05:28,958
‎我問妳，妳真的想當職業愛蟲嗎？

109
00:05:29,041 --> 00:05:31,083
‎大概吧，不過老實說

110
00:05:31,166 --> 00:05:35,083
‎我只要跟朋友還吃得起披薩捲餅

111
00:05:35,166 --> 00:05:36,333
‎一切就沒問題

112
00:05:36,416 --> 00:05:38,125
‎艾咪，妳給我閉上鳥嘴

113
00:05:38,208 --> 00:05:39,916
‎我們的工作很重要

114
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:41,541
‎不是給妳賺錢餬口

115
00:05:41,625 --> 00:05:45,083
‎吃披薩捲餅這種鬼東西

116
00:05:45,166 --> 00:05:47,958
‎桑雅，披薩捲餅超好吃

117
00:05:48,041 --> 00:05:51,166
‎拜託，我才懶得管那麼多

118
00:05:51,250 --> 00:05:53,458
‎貝卡就要生小孩了

119
00:05:53,541 --> 00:05:55,458
‎桑雅，妳沒事吧？

120
00:05:55,541 --> 00:05:58,916
‎我沒事，只是有很多事要忙

121
00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,958
‎而我的助理，也就是妳

122
00:06:01,041 --> 00:06:04,125
‎卻一點都不想幫忙

123
00:06:04,208 --> 00:06:05,958
‎好啦，很遺憾妳那麼忙

124
00:06:06,041 --> 00:06:07,500
‎靠，她是怎麼了？

125
00:06:07,583 --> 00:06:09,666
‎不知道，我已經忘記她講什麼了

126
00:06:09,750 --> 00:06:12,875
‎妳昨晚跟癮天使的約會怎麼樣？

127
00:06:12,958 --> 00:06:15,833
‎快點說，我都快流口水了

128
00:06:15,916 --> 00:06:17,791
‎他有帶妳去浪漫餐廳嗎？

129
00:06:17,875 --> 00:06:20,791
‎他有在燭光氣氛下掏心掏肺嗎？

130
00:06:20,875 --> 00:06:21,791
‎這個嘛…

131
00:06:21,875 --> 00:06:23,000
‎不盡然

132
00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:27,583
‎我們直接跳到上床的部分了

133
00:06:27,666 --> 00:06:28,708
‎妳又來了？

134
00:06:28,791 --> 00:06:33,708
‎真的沒關係，而且也是我想要的

135
00:06:33,791 --> 00:06:35,416
‎不對，妳超級不會撒謊

136
00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:39,500
‎寶貝，妳需要的是會先填飽妳的肚子

137
00:06:39,583 --> 00:06:43,416
‎再用沒戴套的東東填飽妳下面的人

138
00:06:43,500 --> 00:06:45,375
‎天啊，你怎麼知道他沒戴套？

139
00:06:45,458 --> 00:06:47,875
‎拜託喔，我不知道有多瞭解妳

140
00:06:47,958 --> 00:06:49,416
‎你們有何貴幹？

141
00:06:49,500 --> 00:06:52,833
‎-保全進桑雅辦公室幹嘛？
‎-不知道

142
00:06:52,916 --> 00:06:55,166
‎這有寫在桑雅的行事曆上嗎？

143
00:06:55,250 --> 00:06:56,541
‎我怎麼知道？

144
00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:59,125
‎妳是她的助理，那是妳的工作

145
00:06:59,208 --> 00:07:01,583
‎去你的，你不能開除我

146
00:07:01,666 --> 00:07:03,875
‎老娘是歐巴馬夫妻的紅娘耶

147
00:07:03,958 --> 00:07:07,250
‎她太常提到歐巴馬了吧

148
00:07:08,291 --> 00:07:13,625
‎把你的髒手拿開，我可是資深愛蟲

149
00:07:13,708 --> 00:07:15,416
‎-已經不是了
‎-去你的，艾瑞克

150
00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:16,458
‎天啊

151
00:07:16,541 --> 00:07:18,416
‎你們看什麼看？

152
00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:22,875
‎沒看過有人被保全拖出去嗎？

153
00:07:22,958 --> 00:07:27,458
‎混蛋，你要開除她，就一起開除我們

154
00:07:27,541 --> 00:07:29,166
‎我開玩笑的

155
00:07:29,250 --> 00:07:32,458
‎我愛我的工作和高級貨，請別開除我

156
00:07:40,333 --> 00:07:42,458
‎老二汁，聽說你生日

157
00:07:42,541 --> 00:07:44,541
‎你這張肥臉多老了？

158
00:07:44,625 --> 00:07:47,208
‎-我四千萬歲
‎-四千萬歲？

159
00:07:47,291 --> 00:07:50,125
‎你還在負責小朋友？根本是入門級

160
00:07:50,208 --> 00:07:52,458
‎我喜歡小朋友，他們很熱情

161
00:07:52,541 --> 00:07:54,916
‎對啦，“很熱情”，真幽默

162
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:56,500
‎我為你的悲慘人生感到欣慰

163
00:07:56,583 --> 00:07:58,750
‎另外，你有聽說我剛升職

164
00:07:58,833 --> 00:08:01,333
‎當國家美式足球聯盟的睪酮頭頭嗎？

165
00:08:01,416 --> 00:08:02,916
‎-你拿到那個職位？
‎-沒錯

166
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,250
‎從青少年畢業

167
00:08:04,333 --> 00:08:06,916
‎直接跳級到無腦肌肉棒子

168
00:08:07,500 --> 00:08:08,750
‎我愛那些瘋子

169
00:08:08,833 --> 00:08:12,041
‎總之，我週末要去賭城看球賽

170
00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:13,750
‎看球員把對方腦子打成爛泥

171
00:08:13,833 --> 00:08:16,208
‎然後再去妓院大嫖特嫖

172
00:08:16,291 --> 00:08:18,875
‎祝你生日快樂，軟腳娘炮

173
00:08:18,958 --> 00:08:20,916
‎你們知道嘉文升職了嗎？

174
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:22,750
‎誰在意啊？大家的牙醫保險都一樣

175
00:08:22,833 --> 00:08:26,791
‎是沒錯啦，不過嘉文不是在打混度日

176
00:08:26,875 --> 00:08:30,666
‎不會，我能讓兒童自摸就很滿意

177
00:08:30,750 --> 00:08:34,166
‎你們沒質疑過自己的人生意義嗎？

178
00:08:34,666 --> 00:08:35,666
‎為什麼要質疑？

179
00:08:36,291 --> 00:08:40,332
‎真希望能跟你們兩個廢物一樣無腦

180
00:08:40,416 --> 00:08:43,750
‎可惜我的深度是深不見底

181
00:08:43,832 --> 00:08:46,333
‎-好喔，祝你開心
‎-祝你反思愉快

182
00:08:46,416 --> 00:08:47,916
‎有些男怪就是整天厭世

183
00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:48,958
‎他可能是硬不起來

184
00:08:49,041 --> 00:08:50,416
‎-唉唷
‎-搞什麼鬼？

185
00:08:51,541 --> 00:08:53,458
‎陶德，電梯卡住了

186
00:08:53,541 --> 00:08:55,458
‎最近常發生

187
00:08:55,541 --> 00:08:58,750
‎-天才，你可以來修理嗎？
‎-你可以說“麻煩你”嗎？

188
00:08:58,833 --> 00:08:59,750
‎沒問題

189
00:08:59,833 --> 00:09:03,416
‎麻煩負責清大便的工友先生

190
00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:05,208
‎可以來把工作做好嗎？

191
00:09:05,291 --> 00:09:07,958
‎我不是工友，我是營運經理

192
00:09:08,041 --> 00:09:12,333
‎-他掛我們電話嗎？
‎-要是受困，我會吃掉你，懂嗎？

193
00:09:12,416 --> 00:09:14,041
‎我不可能有多好吃

194
00:09:14,125 --> 00:09:15,500
‎因為我吃的東西都不太妙

195
00:09:15,583 --> 00:09:19,125
‎-你都吃什麼？
‎-我吃很多蝦，各種蝦類

196
00:09:19,208 --> 00:09:22,666
‎拜託，妳真的不知道
‎桑雅為什麼被開除？

197
00:09:22,750 --> 00:09:26,791
‎我懂啦，我不做筆記，我沒用心

198
00:09:26,875 --> 00:09:28,916
‎我的從軍經歷也是造假

199
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,708
‎沃特…你知道什麼內情嗎？

200
00:09:30,791 --> 00:09:33,708
‎畢竟你們倆根本是彼此肚子裡的蛔蟲

201
00:09:33,791 --> 00:09:36,708
‎可能性有很多，像是酗酒…

202
00:09:36,791 --> 00:09:39,625
‎聽說她在聖誕派對幹了鬼靈精

203
00:09:39,708 --> 00:09:40,958
‎桑雅讚喔

204
00:09:41,041 --> 00:09:43,041
‎聽說鬼靈精的老二跟聖誕襪一樣長

205
00:09:43,125 --> 00:09:44,750
‎現在她害我們被幹爆了，謝囉

206
00:09:44,833 --> 00:09:46,708
‎而且貝卡再來會怎麼樣？

207
00:09:46,791 --> 00:09:49,375
‎她本來就已經會生尖頭怪寶寶

208
00:09:49,458 --> 00:09:51,583
‎現在連愛蟲都沒有了

209
00:09:52,833 --> 00:09:54,041
‎你們看，管子有東西

210
00:09:54,541 --> 00:09:56,750
‎是要給艾咪的

211
00:09:56,833 --> 00:09:59,125
‎我從來沒收過耶

212
00:09:59,208 --> 00:10:00,500
‎好，我看看

213
00:10:00,583 --> 00:10:03,375
‎“考量到貝卡李臨盆在即

214
00:10:03,458 --> 00:10:05,833
‎以及案件熟悉度

215
00:10:05,916 --> 00:10:09,375
‎由艾咪費爾法克斯暫代貝卡的愛蟲

216
00:10:09,458 --> 00:10:11,166
‎直到新任人選出爐為止”？

217
00:10:11,250 --> 00:10:12,416
‎要由她來擔任？

218
00:10:12,500 --> 00:10:13,791
‎死定了

219
00:10:13,875 --> 00:10:15,708
‎艾咪連行事曆都顧不好

220
00:10:15,791 --> 00:10:18,916
‎等她被胎盤噴滿身會怎麼樣？

221
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,333
‎胎盤？我不知道那是什麼

222
00:10:21,416 --> 00:10:25,250
‎我只有一個問題
‎妳要怎麼對女人組成家庭提出建議？

223
00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:30,416
‎妳連沒醉酒、兩腳鞋子都還在的夜晚
‎都沒辦法安然走回家了

224
00:10:30,500 --> 00:10:33,291
‎慘了，我每次都會搞丟鞋子

225
00:10:33,375 --> 00:10:35,208
‎妳死定了

226
00:10:35,291 --> 00:10:39,500
‎妳對貝卡的瞭解
‎就只有反猶太風格的模仿貝瑞而已

227
00:10:39,583 --> 00:10:41,666
‎那才不會反猶太，應該是吧？

228
00:10:41,750 --> 00:10:43,333
‎至少算不上支持

229
00:10:43,416 --> 00:10:46,791
‎邏輯大哥，你好啊

230
00:10:46,875 --> 00:10:48,458
‎夠了，妳想幹嘛？

231
00:10:48,541 --> 00:10:50,041
‎我覺得可能是搞錯了

232
00:10:50,125 --> 00:10:52,958
‎而且由更資深的愛蟲

233
00:10:53,041 --> 00:10:57,750
‎來擔任貝卡的負責人應該會更好

234
00:10:57,833 --> 00:10:59,291
‎絕對會更好

235
00:10:59,375 --> 00:11:01,666
‎夠了喔，講得還真苛薄

236
00:11:01,750 --> 00:11:04,250
‎不過有辦法辦到嗎？

237
00:11:04,333 --> 00:11:06,625
‎沒有，任務是由管子分派的

238
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:07,916
‎-妳只能照做
‎-就這樣？

239
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,916
‎恕我直言，我對妳完全沒信心

240
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:12,416
‎而且請妳別再煩我了

241
00:11:12,500 --> 00:11:15,250
‎大家快來休息室吃生日蛋糕

242
00:11:16,291 --> 00:11:17,291
‎他來了

243
00:11:17,375 --> 00:11:19,416
‎走吧，小莫，我之前提到的會議

244
00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:21,166
‎真的有這場會

245
00:11:21,250 --> 00:11:23,125
‎現在就在休息室裡開

246
00:11:23,208 --> 00:11:25,541
‎我不懂為什麼要在休息室開會

247
00:11:25,625 --> 00:11:27,000
‎不過我相信妳

248
00:11:27,083 --> 00:11:30,083
‎祝你生日快樂

249
00:11:30,166 --> 00:11:32,958
‎不要，快閉嘴，我不要生日蛋糕

250
00:11:33,041 --> 00:11:34,458
‎小莫，可是這是餅乾蛋糕

251
00:11:34,541 --> 00:11:37,166
‎不是普通蛋糕，是餅乾蛋糕喔

252
00:11:37,250 --> 00:11:38,125
‎我解釋給你聽

253
00:11:38,208 --> 00:11:41,375
‎基本上是餅乾，只是壓成蛋糕形狀

254
00:11:41,458 --> 00:11:45,541
‎泰勒，要是你再說餅乾或蛋糕一次

255
00:11:45,625 --> 00:11:48,958
‎我就把你壓成死人形狀

256
00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:51,000
‎靠，小莫，你搞什麼鬼？

257
00:11:51,083 --> 00:11:54,375
‎你以為這樣就能阻止我吃餅乾蛋糕？

258
00:11:56,666 --> 00:11:57,750
‎有半個貝果耶

259
00:12:00,583 --> 00:12:02,041
‎哇靠

260
00:12:02,125 --> 00:12:04,333
‎-這是哪一層樓？
‎-有差嗎？

261
00:12:04,416 --> 00:12:05,750
‎我們進去比較大的洞吧

262
00:12:05,833 --> 00:12:06,791
‎他就是那麼說的

263
00:12:07,291 --> 00:12:10,458
‎我懂了，就是拿來肛肛好的洞

264
00:12:10,541 --> 00:12:14,333
‎-拿來肛肛好的洞
‎-你腦筋轉得很快嘛

265
00:12:17,250 --> 00:12:18,833
‎這是什麼地方？

266
00:12:18,916 --> 00:12:21,833
‎歡迎來到神奇思想部

267
00:12:21,916 --> 00:12:25,208
‎好喔，“因果命運、信仰”…

268
00:12:25,291 --> 00:12:27,125
‎雪倫一定會很愛這裡

269
00:12:27,208 --> 00:12:29,833
‎她很信那些人類的狗屁

270
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:31,958
‎對啊，人類就是白癡

271
00:12:32,041 --> 00:12:32,958
‎（錯誤工廠）

272
00:12:36,083 --> 00:12:37,041
‎不好意思，寶貝

273
00:12:37,125 --> 00:12:40,250
‎我要去撒一泡又大又熱的尿

274
00:12:40,333 --> 00:12:44,500
‎好喔，希望你能撒乾淨

275
00:12:45,083 --> 00:12:49,416
‎可以給我一碗伏特加
‎再加八顆萊姆嗎？

276
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:51,000
‎-艾咪？
‎-桑雅？

277
00:12:51,916 --> 00:12:57,625
‎記得妳被開除
‎他們把妳的懷孕客戶交給我負責嗎？

278
00:12:57,708 --> 00:12:58,541
‎他們有病啊？

279
00:12:58,625 --> 00:13:00,500
‎先等一下

280
00:13:00,583 --> 00:13:02,875
‎他們把貝卡交給妳負責？

281
00:13:03,791 --> 00:13:05,250
‎這個嗝的味道還真嗆

282
00:13:05,333 --> 00:13:07,375
‎妳實在有夠醉

283
00:13:08,125 --> 00:13:13,750
‎那是因為這個機會讓我很興奮

284
00:13:13,833 --> 00:13:16,708
‎而且我沒有深怕會失敗

285
00:13:16,791 --> 00:13:19,708
‎然後毀掉這個女人的一輩子

286
00:13:19,791 --> 00:13:21,708
‎拜託，別再尖叫了

287
00:13:21,791 --> 00:13:24,125
‎貝卡需要妳，妳振作一點

288
00:13:24,208 --> 00:13:26,166
‎別說她“需要”我

289
00:13:26,250 --> 00:13:27,375
‎妳嚇壞我了

290
00:13:27,458 --> 00:13:29,500
‎而且她還有貝瑞

291
00:13:29,583 --> 00:13:32,958
‎“我是貝瑞，我很愛貝卡，然後…”

292
00:13:33,041 --> 00:13:36,083
‎別鬧了，她很愛貝瑞

293
00:13:36,666 --> 00:13:37,791
‎-喔
‎-什麼事？

294
00:13:37,875 --> 00:13:40,833
‎跟我一起的癮天使要我去廁所找他

295
00:13:40,916 --> 00:13:43,083
‎讓他在我的屁股上吸古柯鹼

296
00:13:43,166 --> 00:13:44,375
‎-艾咪
‎-幹嘛？

297
00:13:44,458 --> 00:13:48,208
‎我又沒有要吸，我只是當工具

298
00:13:48,291 --> 00:13:51,208
‎那我辦得到，我會扮演桌子

299
00:13:51,291 --> 00:13:55,250
‎艾咪，要是妳去廁所，而不去找貝卡

300
00:13:55,333 --> 00:13:57,333
‎我會把妳的觸角從頭上扯下來

301
00:13:57,416 --> 00:13:59,250
‎我辦不到，桑雅

302
00:13:59,333 --> 00:14:00,916
‎看看我的伴是什麼鬼樣子

303
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:03,583
‎我對愛一無所知

304
00:14:03,666 --> 00:14:05,750
‎是要怎麼幫助別人？

305
00:14:05,833 --> 00:14:07,916
‎看著我，我懂這很可怕

306
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:10,125
‎但有時候我們也只能吞下去

307
00:14:10,208 --> 00:14:12,833
‎再可怕也得做，先做再說

308
00:14:12,916 --> 00:14:16,208
‎-但要是…
‎-準備永遠不可能萬全

309
00:14:16,291 --> 00:14:18,833
‎妳只能盡他媽的力試一試

310
00:14:18,916 --> 00:14:21,625
‎好吧，我就“盡他媽的力”吧

311
00:14:21,708 --> 00:14:24,291
‎我會去找貝卡啦

312
00:14:24,375 --> 00:14:26,750
‎不會吧，妳還沒找過她？

313
00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:29,416
‎快去，從這裡滾出去

314
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:31,750
‎謝啦，桑雅，要是但丁問起…

315
00:14:31,833 --> 00:14:32,875
‎相信我，他不會問

316
00:14:32,958 --> 00:14:35,041
‎我知道，我其實心裡有數

317
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:38,125
‎我們今天還是有薪水吧？

318
00:14:38,208 --> 00:14:39,750
‎當然，我們有打上班卡

319
00:14:39,833 --> 00:14:40,666
‎搞什麼鬼？

320
00:14:41,875 --> 00:14:46,458
‎“奇異市集”？比較像“詭異區域”吧？

321
00:14:46,541 --> 00:14:49,666
‎我個人比較喜歡普通商店

322
00:14:49,750 --> 00:14:53,083
‎過來挑個會改變人生的水晶

323
00:14:53,166 --> 00:14:54,375
‎不用了，謝謝

324
00:14:54,458 --> 00:14:55,833
‎聽取命運

325
00:14:55,916 --> 00:14:57,333
‎放眼未來

326
00:14:57,416 --> 00:15:01,083
‎問我現在幾點，我知道答案喔

327
00:15:01,166 --> 00:15:02,375
‎妳好啊

328
00:15:02,458 --> 00:15:04,666
‎你好，帥哥，你想算命嗎？

329
00:15:04,750 --> 00:15:06,083
‎吉爾，你有聽到嗎？

330
00:15:06,166 --> 00:15:07,625
‎她要幫我算命耶

331
00:15:08,458 --> 00:15:09,500
‎好，我要算

332
00:15:10,583 --> 00:15:13,083
‎妹子，妳又是做什麼的？

333
00:15:13,583 --> 00:15:14,958
‎好喔，我先警告

334
00:15:15,041 --> 00:15:18,958
‎我要很久才會硬，不過很快就會結束

335
00:15:20,875 --> 00:15:23,875
‎我怎麼又要尿尿了？

336
00:15:23,958 --> 00:15:26,000
‎這東西出生的時候最好要很有趣

337
00:15:26,708 --> 00:15:27,541
‎妳好

338
00:15:27,625 --> 00:15:29,833
‎抱歉，我出門前忘記上廁所了

339
00:15:29,916 --> 00:15:31,041
‎妳哪位？

340
00:15:31,125 --> 00:15:32,666
‎我是妳的新愛蟲艾咪

341
00:15:33,750 --> 00:15:34,750
‎幫我萬歲

342
00:15:34,833 --> 00:15:36,958
‎我不要換新愛蟲，桑雅呢？

343
00:15:37,041 --> 00:15:39,041
‎-她被炒魷魚了
‎-什麼？

344
00:15:39,125 --> 00:15:41,708
‎不過沒人知道原因

345
00:15:41,791 --> 00:15:43,541
‎我可能知道

346
00:15:43,625 --> 00:15:47,125
‎那是因為她幹了鬼靈精

347
00:15:47,208 --> 00:15:48,666
‎妳喝醉了嗎？

348
00:15:48,750 --> 00:15:50,416
‎妳懷孕了嗎？

349
00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:52,500
‎我是在開玩笑，我知道妳是孕婦

350
00:15:52,583 --> 00:15:55,875
‎天啊，我第一個案主就是孕婦，哇靠

351
00:15:55,958 --> 00:15:58,083
‎妳是在開玩笑嗎？妳以前沒經驗？

352
00:15:58,166 --> 00:15:59,625
‎一次都沒有

353
00:15:59,708 --> 00:16:02,833
‎對了，妳有上網查過“胎盤”嗎？超噁

354
00:16:02,916 --> 00:16:05,041
‎桑雅拋棄了妳

355
00:16:05,125 --> 00:16:07,833
‎這隻新蟲看起來也無法勝任

356
00:16:07,916 --> 00:16:10,041
‎她為什麼只有一腳穿鞋子？

357
00:16:10,125 --> 00:16:11,166
‎糟糕

358
00:16:11,250 --> 00:16:13,708
‎而且我的襪子是麥當勞薯餅袋

359
00:16:13,791 --> 00:16:16,500
‎貝卡，妳一定嚇壞了

360
00:16:16,583 --> 00:16:18,541
‎我的新愛蟲是個低能醉鬼

361
00:16:18,625 --> 00:16:19,666
‎別這樣

362
00:16:19,750 --> 00:16:21,416
‎妳還以為妳能照顧嬰兒？

363
00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:23,375
‎妳說得對，我不能當媽

364
00:16:23,458 --> 00:16:26,291
‎我的內衣櫃裡還有大麻電子菸

365
00:16:26,375 --> 00:16:27,833
‎哪種大麻？昏沉的或提神的？

366
00:16:27,916 --> 00:16:29,250
‎要是早產怎麼辦？

367
00:16:29,333 --> 00:16:30,833
‎大家都有愛嗎？

368
00:16:30,916 --> 00:16:33,791
‎-貝瑞怎麼辦？
‎-就是說啊，他好黏人

369
00:16:33,875 --> 00:16:36,875
‎“我是貝瑞，我愛妳”

370
00:16:36,958 --> 00:16:39,250
‎妳以後會常看到我模仿，我功力很棒

371
00:16:39,333 --> 00:16:41,958
‎還有狗！牠一定會咬爆寶寶的臉

372
00:16:42,041 --> 00:16:44,791
‎妳的醜寶寶會抽妳的大麻

373
00:16:44,875 --> 00:16:46,125
‎你們可以閉嘴嗎？

374
00:16:47,125 --> 00:16:48,500
‎慘了

375
00:16:48,583 --> 00:16:50,875
‎-那是什麼？
‎-妳該不會…

376
00:16:50,958 --> 00:16:51,958
‎尿在地板上？

377
00:16:52,041 --> 00:16:54,458
‎夠了喔，我只有穿一隻鞋耶

378
00:16:54,541 --> 00:16:56,166
‎應該是我的羊水破了

379
00:16:56,250 --> 00:17:01,541
‎-糟糕，那是什麼意思？
‎-貝卡，妳要生了

380
00:17:01,625 --> 00:17:04,750
‎你的床底下不太可能有怪獸

381
00:17:04,833 --> 00:17:06,250
‎因為怪獸很大隻

382
00:17:06,333 --> 00:17:08,875
‎換作是我，就會多擔心你的壁櫥

383
00:17:09,833 --> 00:17:12,875
‎我得走了，人難免會死
‎所以你盡量別窮擔心吧

384
00:17:14,333 --> 00:17:18,290
‎多吃幾顆興奮劑，趕快把報告解決

385
00:17:19,040 --> 00:17:21,125
‎你到底想不想要這筆炸豆泥生意？

386
00:17:21,208 --> 00:17:23,915
‎還是想跟你的廢物老爸一樣
‎永遠搞普通豆子？

387
00:17:24,415 --> 00:17:29,375
‎聰明喔，竟然在婚禮敬酒時
‎提到她的姊妹是大美人

388
00:17:29,458 --> 00:17:30,333
‎聽我說

389
00:17:30,416 --> 00:17:34,666
‎等你晚點老二硬不起來，我會再回來

390
00:17:35,166 --> 00:17:37,208
‎小莫，你待在這裡多久了？

391
00:17:37,291 --> 00:17:38,500
‎別煩我

392
00:17:38,583 --> 00:17:39,833
‎你怎麼了？

393
00:17:39,916 --> 00:17:41,666
‎今天是你生日耶，寶貝

394
00:17:41,750 --> 00:17:44,291
‎應該要狂歡做愛之類的

395
00:17:44,375 --> 00:17:46,458
‎我已經四千萬歲了

396
00:17:46,541 --> 00:17:48,166
‎我有什麼成就可言？

397
00:17:48,250 --> 00:17:50,750
‎我讓小孩射在死掉的爺爺身上？

398
00:17:50,833 --> 00:17:51,708
‎根本業餘程度

399
00:17:51,791 --> 00:17:54,166
‎但你在Netflix上有兩個節目

400
00:17:54,250 --> 00:17:57,375
‎那又怎樣？每個人都有Netflix節目

401
00:17:57,458 --> 00:18:00,500
‎我沒小孩，也沒穩定伴侶

402
00:18:00,583 --> 00:18:01,416
‎我不是在嗆妳喔

403
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:04,541
‎沒事，我也不想要穩定伴侶

404
00:18:04,625 --> 00:18:06,583
‎也是，穩定伴侶很白癡

405
00:18:06,666 --> 00:18:10,375
‎給你來個生日口交會比較開心嗎？

406
00:18:10,458 --> 00:18:12,625
‎至少不會更難過

407
00:18:12,708 --> 00:18:15,250
‎糟糕，口交要等下次了

408
00:18:15,333 --> 00:18:17,416
‎貝卡要生了，我得先閃了

409
00:18:17,916 --> 00:18:22,000
‎看來我只能跟廢物一樣
‎幫自己哈屌，反正我就爛

410
00:18:22,083 --> 00:18:27,291
‎唯一會幫你哈屌的嘴
‎就是你醜臉上的那一張

411
00:18:27,375 --> 00:18:29,208
‎祝你生日快樂，白癡

412
00:18:31,583 --> 00:18:33,250
‎-好臭
‎-有一點

413
00:18:33,333 --> 00:18:34,916
‎我能判讀你的氣場嗎？

414
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,541
‎好，隨妳喜歡，寶貝

415
00:18:37,625 --> 00:18:41,916
‎藍色代表心智，你的無牽無掛

416
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:44,250
‎我就不對這番話做過度解讀了

417
00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:46,000
‎綠色代表心靈

418
00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:49,541
‎天啊，我在你體內感測到大量堵塞

419
00:18:49,625 --> 00:18:51,833
‎妳有什麼毛病？我以為我們是要幹炮

420
00:18:51,916 --> 00:18:55,208
‎我感應到你會自我封閉

421
00:18:55,291 --> 00:18:57,041
‎情感上、生理上

422
00:18:57,125 --> 00:18:58,833
‎或許是對你太太？

423
00:18:58,916 --> 00:19:03,875
‎就算我是荷爾蒙男怪
‎也不代表我每週都想做愛，雪倫

424
00:19:03,958 --> 00:19:05,875
‎沒錯，敞開心胸

425
00:19:06,541 --> 00:19:10,625
‎因為我媽一年前過世
‎我現在還在哀悼，雪倫

426
00:19:10,708 --> 00:19:12,541
‎我知道妳受不了她

427
00:19:12,625 --> 00:19:14,916
‎但她依然是我的媽咪

428
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,333
‎原來如此，這就說得通了

429
00:19:17,416 --> 00:19:21,416
‎天啊，我感到如釋重負

430
00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:22,708
‎妳對我做了什麼？

431
00:19:22,791 --> 00:19:24,708
‎我解開了你閉鎖的心輪

432
00:19:24,791 --> 00:19:26,583
‎妳是那些什麼脈輪的玩意？

433
00:19:26,666 --> 00:19:27,958
‎就是雪倫說的那種？

434
00:19:28,041 --> 00:19:31,125
‎這是騙局！脈輪騙局！

435
00:19:31,625 --> 00:19:34,416
‎住手，離我遠一點

436
00:19:36,666 --> 00:19:38,000
‎剛才是發生什麼事？

437
00:19:38,083 --> 00:19:42,416
‎聖杯皇后說我會死在7月9日，隨便啦

438
00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:43,541
‎我遇到了脈輪

439
00:19:43,625 --> 00:19:45,875
‎老喬，我不知道該怎麼說，但…

440
00:19:45,958 --> 00:19:48,583
‎我可能意外對自己多了一點瞭解

441
00:19:48,666 --> 00:19:50,916
‎-你在開玩笑吧
‎-我沒有在開玩笑

442
00:19:51,500 --> 00:19:55,250
‎-看來你現在相信脈輪了
‎-對，別告訴雪倫

443
00:19:55,333 --> 00:19:58,625
‎你也別告訴南茜我會死在7月9日

444
00:19:58,708 --> 00:20:00,166
‎我想給她驚喜

445
00:20:01,458 --> 00:20:03,166
‎貝卡寶貝，我能幫什麼忙？

446
00:20:03,250 --> 00:20:05,833
‎妳要風扇嗎？零食？

447
00:20:05,916 --> 00:20:08,458
‎我要這隻寄生蟲給我滾出去

448
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:09,666
‎先從風扇開始吧

449
00:20:09,750 --> 00:20:10,750
‎寄生蟲？

450
00:20:10,833 --> 00:20:13,875
‎大家當心，好媽媽來囉

451
00:20:13,958 --> 00:20:15,958
‎貝卡，妳很堅強

452
00:20:16,041 --> 00:20:18,750
‎女強人，妳還好嗎？

453
00:20:18,833 --> 00:20:21,625
‎感覺好像我的屁眼要裂成兩半

454
00:20:21,708 --> 00:20:24,000
‎風扇吹我的臉，不要吹我的鮑魚

455
00:20:24,083 --> 00:20:25,500
‎不好意思

456
00:20:25,583 --> 00:20:29,750
‎艾咪，我們這裡需要一些愛意喔

457
00:20:29,833 --> 00:20:32,916
‎我在這裡就好，情況我已經懂了大概

458
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:36,500
‎貝卡？別忘了要換姿勢

459
00:20:36,583 --> 00:20:40,208
‎彼特，你可以把網路資料收起來嗎？

460
00:20:40,291 --> 00:20:41,333
‎我是想要幫忙耶

461
00:20:41,416 --> 00:20:43,083
‎妳竟然做了硬脊膜外麻醉

462
00:20:43,166 --> 00:20:45,000
‎難怪會拖那麼久

463
00:20:45,083 --> 00:20:46,833
‎也不一定是這個原因

464
00:20:46,916 --> 00:20:49,041
‎現在妳推的時候不會有感覺

465
00:20:49,125 --> 00:20:53,250
‎-人就是這樣才會撕裂
‎-撕破怎麼辦？一定會是個大洞

466
00:20:53,333 --> 00:20:56,458
‎要是鮑魚屁眼合體，她要怎麼做愛？

467
00:20:56,541 --> 00:20:58,375
‎別拉屎

468
00:20:58,458 --> 00:21:00,416
‎拉了貝瑞就會離開妳

469
00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:02,916
‎要是拉屎能甩掉那傢伙就好了

470
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:06,083
‎貝卡，深呼吸，無視那些白癡

471
00:21:06,166 --> 00:21:07,375
‎一切很快就會過去

472
00:21:07,458 --> 00:21:10,375
‎我從來沒有比這一刻還要愛妳

473
00:21:10,458 --> 00:21:11,583
‎誰管你，貝瑞？

474
00:21:11,666 --> 00:21:13,958
‎要嘛就代替我生，不然就閉上鳥嘴

475
00:21:14,041 --> 00:21:16,375
‎-我知道妳不是在氣我
‎-就是在氣你！

476
00:21:16,958 --> 00:21:20,500
‎快過去，大家都在盡職責
‎妳也要做到本分

477
00:21:20,583 --> 00:21:23,166
‎可是我不知道怎麼盡本分

478
00:21:23,250 --> 00:21:27,208
‎我上次嘗試，她的羊水就破了
‎還淹到我沒穿鞋子的赤腳

479
00:21:27,291 --> 00:21:30,375
‎妳就去安撫她，說這裡充滿了愛意

480
00:21:30,458 --> 00:21:33,041
‎或隨便講幾句妳們愛蟲的正向屁話

481
00:21:33,125 --> 00:21:34,916
‎嬰兒心率急速下跌

482
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,916
‎-什麼意思？
‎-幫她做手術準備

483
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,416
‎告訴我，不要只跟同事講話

484
00:21:38,500 --> 00:21:41,333
‎聽我說，妳現在該開始推了

485
00:21:41,416 --> 00:21:43,625
‎現在嗎？不是，我只開了8公分

486
00:21:43,708 --> 00:21:44,958
‎撕裂啦

487
00:21:45,041 --> 00:21:47,375
‎靠，我看到頭了

488
00:21:47,458 --> 00:21:49,958
‎-妳的寶寶有可能會是椰子嗎？
‎-艾咪

489
00:21:50,041 --> 00:21:51,333
‎天啊，我看…

490
00:21:54,208 --> 00:21:55,500
‎他媽的

491
00:21:55,583 --> 00:21:58,541
‎不好意思，我現在完全酒醒了

492
00:21:59,625 --> 00:22:00,458
‎可悲

493
00:22:00,958 --> 00:22:02,750
‎驚喜！

494
00:22:02,833 --> 00:22:04,250
‎祝你生日快樂，小莫

495
00:22:04,333 --> 00:22:06,666
‎我太感動了

496
00:22:09,208 --> 00:22:11,125
‎還有回顧短片耶

497
00:22:11,666 --> 00:22:15,166
‎那是我們發現打手槍的那次

498
00:22:15,250 --> 00:22:18,208
‎還有火焰，那天是大日子

499
00:22:18,291 --> 00:22:23,041
‎還有《慾經》，那才叫圖像小說嘛

500
00:22:23,708 --> 00:22:24,750
‎你們一定懂

501
00:22:24,833 --> 00:22:26,166
‎還有喬沃爾許

502
00:22:26,250 --> 00:22:28,458
‎我們那晚在克里夫蘭大玩特玩

503
00:22:28,541 --> 00:22:29,500
‎可愛

504
00:22:30,375 --> 00:22:31,541
‎他叫安德魯什麼來著？

505
00:22:32,541 --> 00:22:34,666
‎你們怎麼會有這些照片？

506
00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:36,791
‎謝謝你們

507
00:22:37,291 --> 00:22:39,916
‎大家要不要一起打一槍

508
00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:43,750
‎紀念我的四千萬歲生日？

509
00:22:44,625 --> 00:22:48,041
‎你們別性急，要讓壽星先射

510
00:22:48,125 --> 00:22:51,666
‎貝卡，妳的表現很好
‎但我們要繼續用力推

511
00:22:51,750 --> 00:22:53,708
‎“我們”？我去你媽的

512
00:22:54,291 --> 00:22:56,041
‎妳要更用力推

513
00:22:56,125 --> 00:22:57,541
‎我撐不下去了

514
00:22:57,625 --> 00:23:00,333
‎這裡會需要愛，一定是有合理理由

515
00:23:00,416 --> 00:23:02,375
‎這女人面臨難關

516
00:23:02,458 --> 00:23:04,583
‎沒有愛根本不可能克服

517
00:23:04,666 --> 00:23:05,833
‎好啦

518
00:23:07,500 --> 00:23:09,458
‎貝卡加油，關鍵時刻來了

519
00:23:09,541 --> 00:23:11,208
‎妳就要當媽了

520
00:23:11,291 --> 00:23:12,958
‎我辦不到

521
00:23:13,041 --> 00:23:15,208
‎我不想放棄悠哉洗澡

522
00:23:15,291 --> 00:23:17,166
‎還有躺在床上看iPad

523
00:23:17,250 --> 00:23:20,166
‎-好喔
‎-我還沒做好當媽的準備

524
00:23:20,250 --> 00:23:21,666
‎準備或許永遠不可能萬全

525
00:23:21,750 --> 00:23:23,083
‎這句話有什麼屁用？

526
00:23:23,166 --> 00:23:24,791
‎有些事就是這樣

527
00:23:24,875 --> 00:23:27,083
‎到時候會又可怕又困難

528
00:23:27,166 --> 00:23:29,250
‎我們有時候還會丟掉一隻鞋

529
00:23:29,333 --> 00:23:32,083
‎但還是要穿起薯餅襪

530
00:23:32,166 --> 00:23:34,041
‎然後咬牙硬上

531
00:23:34,125 --> 00:23:35,375
‎因為妳就是妳

532
00:23:35,458 --> 00:23:37,333
‎事情就在妳的掌握之中

533
00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:39,000
‎多說一點

534
00:23:39,083 --> 00:23:42,708
‎妳會搏擊，而且工作似乎很出色

535
00:23:42,791 --> 00:23:44,333
‎不管妳幹的是哪門子工作

536
00:23:44,416 --> 00:23:46,000
‎我是律師

537
00:23:46,083 --> 00:23:47,958
‎妳看，聽起來有夠難當

538
00:23:48,041 --> 00:23:49,875
‎而且妳還嫁給貝瑞

539
00:23:49,958 --> 00:23:52,333
‎這我絕對做不到

540
00:23:52,416 --> 00:23:55,416
‎-看起來很不妙
‎-他一定會是好爸爸

541
00:23:55,500 --> 00:23:58,041
‎重點是妳永遠不可能感到準備萬全

542
00:23:58,125 --> 00:24:02,416
‎妳能做的就只是盡他媽的力試一試

543
00:24:02,500 --> 00:24:03,875
‎給我振作起來

544
00:24:10,458 --> 00:24:12,666
‎-妳成功了
‎-拖得還真夠久

545
00:24:12,750 --> 00:24:14,666
‎-我們是一家人了
‎-我有漏屎嗎？

546
00:24:16,041 --> 00:24:17,125
‎沒有，那是…

547
00:24:17,208 --> 00:24:18,375
‎我這麼說好了

548
00:24:18,458 --> 00:24:20,375
‎我不知道那是什麼

549
00:24:20,458 --> 00:24:22,958
‎不過東西還在漏

550
00:24:23,041 --> 00:24:24,708
‎妳最好冰敷一下

551
00:24:25,916 --> 00:24:27,250
‎他的頭不尖耶

552
00:24:27,333 --> 00:24:28,875
‎比較像蛋頭

553
00:24:28,958 --> 00:24:30,750
‎很好，妳幾乎沒用藥

554
00:24:30,833 --> 00:24:32,958
‎妳可以告訴大家妳生產沒靠藥物幫助

555
00:24:33,041 --> 00:24:34,458
‎艾咪，換妳了，快上

556
00:24:37,791 --> 00:24:39,083
‎那東西看起來好怪

557
00:24:39,166 --> 00:24:41,000
‎對啊，確實很怪

558
00:24:41,500 --> 00:24:45,916
‎靠，好像有人把蛋頭先生的五官
‎放在一顆棒球上面

559
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,458
‎-艾咪？
‎-幹嘛吼我？明明就是真的

560
00:24:48,541 --> 00:24:50,541
‎騙子才會說那東西可愛

561
00:25:34,250 --> 00:25:35,166
‎字幕翻譯：韓仁耀