1 00:00:08,009 --> 00:00:10,970 [upbeat music] 2 00:00:11,012 --> 00:00:12,972 - So, Kaley, 3 00:00:13,014 --> 00:00:15,266 who you taking to the Solstice Dance this weekend? 4 00:00:15,308 --> 00:00:16,601 - Ugh, I can't decide. 5 00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:18,269 I mean, this is Valley High's most important 6 00:00:18,311 --> 00:00:19,896 social event of the year. 7 00:00:19,937 --> 00:00:21,147 - You think you have problems? 8 00:00:21,189 --> 00:00:22,356 Ping-Pong just got canceled 9 00:00:22,398 --> 00:00:24,400 'cause Coach Nader got a concussion. 10 00:00:24,442 --> 00:00:26,986 - Dope stroll, Jake. 11 00:00:27,028 --> 00:00:28,362 - Oh, is he-- - Guys... 12 00:00:28,404 --> 00:00:30,114 we need to figure out how to beat Bayside 13 00:00:30,156 --> 00:00:31,282 in the School Spirit Competition 14 00:00:31,324 --> 00:00:33,117 that's over a year away right now. 15 00:00:33,159 --> 00:00:34,619 - No, thanks. 16 00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:36,287 - Ooh, we could fill their lockers with shaving cream? 17 00:00:36,329 --> 00:00:37,789 - You're thinking too small. 18 00:00:37,830 --> 00:00:39,582 - We could burn down their school and piss on the ashes. 19 00:00:39,624 --> 00:00:40,792 - You're also thinking too small. 20 00:00:40,833 --> 00:00:43,086 Guys, if we want to guarantee victory, 21 00:00:43,127 --> 00:00:46,255 then we need to know their every move before they make it. 22 00:00:46,297 --> 00:00:47,673 Get inside their heads. 23 00:00:47,715 --> 00:00:49,759 Become Baysiders. 24 00:00:49,801 --> 00:00:52,470 Oh, my God, that's it. 25 00:00:52,512 --> 00:00:54,806 I'm gonna go undercover as a mole. 26 00:00:54,847 --> 00:00:57,266 - But you can't, Jake. You're the King of Valley. 27 00:00:57,308 --> 00:01:00,311 You can't go to Bayside. It's disgusting. 28 00:01:00,353 --> 00:01:01,562 - It's also insane. 29 00:01:01,604 --> 00:01:04,982 - So insane, it just might... 30 00:01:05,024 --> 00:01:07,318 [tense music] 31 00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:09,946 Go the way I want it to. 32 00:01:09,987 --> 00:01:11,781 [record scratch] - Pause. 33 00:01:11,823 --> 00:01:13,032 Check, please. 34 00:01:13,074 --> 00:01:14,450 [school bell rings] 35 00:01:14,492 --> 00:01:15,827 - * When I go to bed at one * 36 00:01:15,868 --> 00:01:17,578 * Got to wake up on the run * 37 00:01:17,620 --> 00:01:20,415 * Or I'll be late 'cause I keep hitting the snooze * 38 00:01:20,456 --> 00:01:21,916 * All I want is half a waffle * 39 00:01:21,958 --> 00:01:23,668 * But this pimple's looking awful * 40 00:01:23,710 --> 00:01:25,420 * Got to skate on up to Valley * 41 00:01:25,461 --> 00:01:28,464 * I think I found an excuse * 42 00:01:28,506 --> 00:01:30,174 * It's all fine * 43 00:01:30,216 --> 00:01:34,804 * I'm in the nick of time * 44 00:01:34,846 --> 00:01:36,347 [dramatic music] 45 00:01:36,389 --> 00:01:38,099 - You're a mole from Valley? 46 00:01:38,141 --> 00:01:40,518 [all gasp] - Wow. 47 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:42,353 - Wait, but how could you be a mole? 48 00:01:42,395 --> 00:01:44,063 I went undercover to research you. 49 00:01:44,105 --> 00:01:48,276 - But I had all of Valley behind me covering my tracks. 50 00:01:48,317 --> 00:01:49,861 The computer club faked my socials. 51 00:01:49,902 --> 00:01:51,195 - [gasps] 52 00:01:51,237 --> 00:01:52,363 - The rich kids pooled together their allowance 53 00:01:52,405 --> 00:01:54,323 to get me a condo in the Bayside zip code. 54 00:01:54,365 --> 00:01:57,201 And the drama kids gave me this nerdy persona 55 00:01:57,243 --> 00:01:58,411 and taught me how to tuck my hair 56 00:01:58,453 --> 00:02:00,621 behind my ear in a cute, shy way. 57 00:02:00,663 --> 00:02:02,331 all: Aw. 58 00:02:02,373 --> 00:02:04,333 - Babe. - I'm sorry. 59 00:02:04,375 --> 00:02:07,795 - So you are evil? Mac was right? 60 00:02:07,837 --> 00:02:09,964 - Yeah, and I don't know how he knew. 61 00:02:10,006 --> 00:02:11,591 What gave it away? 62 00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:14,218 Was it when I tried to sabotage the talent show 63 00:02:14,260 --> 00:02:15,386 by getting you to perform? 64 00:02:15,428 --> 00:02:17,346 - Hey, Daisy, your guilt convinced me. 65 00:02:17,388 --> 00:02:18,556 I'm gonna compete in the talent show. 66 00:02:18,598 --> 00:02:19,849 Thanks, bud. - What? 67 00:02:19,891 --> 00:02:22,393 - Then me and Eunice are out. - Sorry, Daisy... 68 00:02:22,435 --> 00:02:23,895 - Or was it when 69 00:02:23,936 --> 00:02:25,605 my beloved Valley bulldog was excited to see me? 70 00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:26,773 - [barks] 71 00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:28,566 - Figure it out, Spirit Czar. 72 00:02:28,608 --> 00:02:30,401 - Or was it when I made sure 73 00:02:30,443 --> 00:02:31,694 that you were named Spirit Czar 74 00:02:31,736 --> 00:02:32,862 'cause I knew you'd fail? 75 00:02:32,904 --> 00:02:34,447 - You should be the Spirit Czar. 76 00:02:34,489 --> 00:02:36,824 - Oh, my God. - [laughs] 77 00:02:36,866 --> 00:02:38,409 - You finally see the talent in me. 78 00:02:38,451 --> 00:02:41,704 - So, tell me, what was it? 79 00:02:41,746 --> 00:02:44,040 - What you failed to consider is 80 00:02:44,082 --> 00:02:47,752 I'm too self-absorbed to have noticed any of that. 81 00:02:47,794 --> 00:02:50,254 I just hated you for no reason. 82 00:02:50,296 --> 00:02:52,840 - Man, why are you bragging about a plan that didn't work? 83 00:02:52,882 --> 00:02:54,425 Mac did a good job as Spirit Czar. 84 00:02:54,467 --> 00:02:55,593 - Thank you. - Yes. 85 00:02:55,635 --> 00:02:57,845 Which forced me to move to Plan B-- 86 00:02:57,887 --> 00:03:01,391 destroying all evidence of Bayside's volunteer hours. 87 00:03:01,432 --> 00:03:03,267 - But I watched you upload 88 00:03:03,309 --> 00:03:05,436 all of the hours to the Spirit database. 89 00:03:05,478 --> 00:03:07,397 - You watched me upload them 90 00:03:07,438 --> 00:03:09,649 to SoYouWantThisTo DisappearForever.com, 91 00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:13,277 and then I handed them to you to shred and incinerate. 92 00:03:13,319 --> 00:03:15,613 - Oh, yeah. I did do that. 93 00:03:15,655 --> 00:03:17,281 [all groan] - Come on, now. 94 00:03:17,323 --> 00:03:18,658 - Of course you did 95 00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:20,410 'cause you're a gullible Bayside idiot. 96 00:03:20,451 --> 00:03:22,578 - And what about me? 97 00:03:22,620 --> 00:03:25,456 I guess I'm the biggest idiot of them all. 98 00:03:25,498 --> 00:03:27,792 - Daisy. Daisy, wait. 99 00:03:27,834 --> 00:03:30,086 I know how it sounds, but the only thing 100 00:03:30,128 --> 00:03:32,839 that didn't go to plan was falling for you. 101 00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:36,467 If we could just talk about-- - Talk about what? 102 00:03:36,509 --> 00:03:39,262 I don't even know your real name. 103 00:03:39,303 --> 00:03:42,265 - It's Jake Takamura. 104 00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:43,850 Daisy, my feelings were real. 105 00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:45,810 - Yo, man, I don't think she wants to talk to you right now. 106 00:03:45,852 --> 00:03:47,061 - Yeah, why don't you get the hell out of here. 107 00:03:47,103 --> 00:03:49,105 - You disgust me, Gil, 108 00:03:49,147 --> 00:03:51,649 if that's even your real name. [spits] 109 00:03:51,691 --> 00:03:54,902 - I just said it's Jake. - Yeah, I forgot! I know! 110 00:03:56,779 --> 00:03:58,072 - Go. 111 00:03:58,114 --> 00:04:01,033 [somber music] 112 00:04:01,075 --> 00:04:04,579 * * 113 00:04:04,620 --> 00:04:06,831 I just feel so stupid. 114 00:04:06,873 --> 00:04:09,000 - Daisy, this kind of thing happens all the time. 115 00:04:09,041 --> 00:04:10,543 - It does? 116 00:04:10,585 --> 00:04:13,171 - Well, not this exact thing, but, you know, 117 00:04:13,212 --> 00:04:16,215 you fall for someone and then later find out he's a cheater 118 00:04:16,257 --> 00:04:19,177 or an organ harvester, or he has a secret room 119 00:04:19,218 --> 00:04:20,553 full of Victorian dolls 120 00:04:20,595 --> 00:04:22,597 who all wear tiny versions of your outfits. 121 00:04:22,638 --> 00:04:24,057 - Hmm. [phone rings] 122 00:04:24,098 --> 00:04:26,392 - It's Gil. Maybe I should-- - Uh! Mm-mm. 123 00:04:26,434 --> 00:04:28,644 - Come on. I can handle talking to him. 124 00:04:28,686 --> 00:04:30,813 I just need to know how much of it was a lie. 125 00:04:30,855 --> 00:04:32,690 - The only thing that you need to know is 126 00:04:32,732 --> 00:04:34,525 that boy's a full-on sociopath. 127 00:04:34,567 --> 00:04:35,860 - Yeah, and he's gonna keep calling you, 128 00:04:35,902 --> 00:04:37,737 so you better block his number now. 129 00:04:37,779 --> 00:04:39,530 - Oh, I can't block numbers on my phone. 130 00:04:39,572 --> 00:04:41,115 You have to put in a request with Marge 131 00:04:41,157 --> 00:04:42,366 at the operator's office, 132 00:04:42,408 --> 00:04:43,868 but she's on a Viking River Cruise this week. 133 00:04:43,910 --> 00:04:45,203 - Well, then someone should stay with you 134 00:04:45,244 --> 00:04:47,580 so you're not tempted to answer the phone... 135 00:04:47,622 --> 00:04:49,832 someone like your best friend. 136 00:04:49,874 --> 00:04:51,834 - Aisha's right. 137 00:04:51,876 --> 00:04:53,378 I'll do it. 138 00:04:53,419 --> 00:04:55,713 - Don't you have more important things to worry about? 139 00:04:55,755 --> 00:04:57,340 Bayside's out of the Spirit Competition. 140 00:04:57,382 --> 00:04:59,926 - Oh, we'll be competing. 141 00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:03,846 Let's just say that I have one last trick up my sleeve... 142 00:05:05,598 --> 00:05:08,226 Tattling to adults. 143 00:05:08,267 --> 00:05:09,811 - He told my mom, 144 00:05:09,852 --> 00:05:11,646 and she is the best at holding people accountable. 145 00:05:11,687 --> 00:05:13,189 After the BP oil spill, 146 00:05:13,231 --> 00:05:15,525 she got every executive there to adopt a pet duck, 147 00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:18,236 only two of which were turned into pâté. 148 00:05:18,277 --> 00:05:22,240 * * 149 00:05:22,281 --> 00:05:23,908 - So Gil was a mole, huh? 150 00:05:23,950 --> 00:05:26,077 [scoffs] I knew our generation was right 151 00:05:26,119 --> 00:05:28,037 to have an irrational hatred of nerds. 152 00:05:28,079 --> 00:05:30,248 - Mm. - So how's Daisy holding up? 153 00:05:30,289 --> 00:05:31,749 - I'm not sure. 154 00:05:31,791 --> 00:05:33,835 I offered to help, but she said she didn't want to talk. 155 00:05:33,876 --> 00:05:37,630 - [scoffs] Man, Valley's so lucky we're grown-ups now, 156 00:05:37,672 --> 00:05:39,966 'cause when we were kids, we met fire with fire. 157 00:05:40,007 --> 00:05:42,135 - Remember when they stole Screech's lucky hat, 158 00:05:42,176 --> 00:05:43,594 so we kidnapped their chess player? 159 00:05:43,636 --> 00:05:45,847 He got sent back to Siberia. 160 00:05:45,888 --> 00:05:48,766 Now his job is breaking rocks with his hands. 161 00:05:48,808 --> 00:05:50,810 - Yeah, it took me a long time to realize 162 00:05:50,852 --> 00:05:53,855 the best revenge is an open and honest conversation. 163 00:05:53,896 --> 00:05:57,233 - Okay, you keep saying emotionally mature things. 164 00:05:57,275 --> 00:06:00,820 You're barely sexist anymore. What's going on with you? 165 00:06:00,862 --> 00:06:03,489 - Don't let this go to your head, but... 166 00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:08,286 I took your advice and started doing a little therapy. 167 00:06:08,327 --> 00:06:10,872 - Slater, I'm proud of you. 168 00:06:10,913 --> 00:06:12,790 - Yeah, I think it's working, too. 169 00:06:12,832 --> 00:06:15,001 Haven't punched a hole in a wall in, like, three days. 170 00:06:15,043 --> 00:06:17,712 And that's only 'cause of the Dodger's lousy relief pitching. 171 00:06:17,754 --> 00:06:20,757 That damn bullpen just-- [breathes deeply] 172 00:06:20,798 --> 00:06:23,259 Breathe, Slater, breathe. 173 00:06:23,301 --> 00:06:25,136 See? 174 00:06:25,178 --> 00:06:26,637 [electricity crackles] 175 00:06:26,679 --> 00:06:28,806 - What the hell was that? - Ooh. 176 00:06:28,848 --> 00:06:30,683 Did you just feel a chill? - Yeah. 177 00:06:30,725 --> 00:06:32,977 - Jessie, Slater, this is Pat Krampus. 178 00:06:33,019 --> 00:06:34,854 She's the principal of Valley High. 179 00:06:34,896 --> 00:06:36,147 - Let's make this fast. 180 00:06:36,189 --> 00:06:38,483 I'm late for a very important dark summoning. 181 00:06:38,524 --> 00:06:39,984 - Did you mean to say, like, meeting 182 00:06:40,026 --> 00:06:41,319 or something normal like that? 183 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:42,361 - No. 184 00:06:42,403 --> 00:06:46,324 * * 185 00:06:46,365 --> 00:06:48,576 - So we just need you to call the Spirit board 186 00:06:48,618 --> 00:06:50,328 and explain what your student did 187 00:06:50,369 --> 00:06:53,331 so we can get our Spirit hours reinstated. 188 00:06:53,372 --> 00:06:55,500 - Mm, I'm afraid I can't do that. 189 00:06:55,541 --> 00:06:57,377 - But Gil cheated. 190 00:06:57,418 --> 00:07:00,838 He destroyed all evidence of our students' hard work. 191 00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:03,549 - And what about the hard work our sweet Gil put in? 192 00:07:03,591 --> 00:07:05,802 He walked your disgusting halls. 193 00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:08,012 He ate your disgusting food. 194 00:07:08,054 --> 00:07:10,848 He took PE with your disgusting gym teacher, Slater. 195 00:07:10,890 --> 00:07:13,226 - Hey, I'm Slater. - I know. 196 00:07:13,267 --> 00:07:15,770 Look, Gil was a registered student, 197 00:07:15,812 --> 00:07:19,023 so everything he did was completely within the rules. 198 00:07:19,065 --> 00:07:21,692 Now, if that's all, I would literally rather stand 199 00:07:21,734 --> 00:07:25,154 in a crypt full of spiders than sit here for one more moment, 200 00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:26,280 which speaking of-- 201 00:07:26,322 --> 00:07:28,116 [scoffs] Yep, I'm late. 202 00:07:28,157 --> 00:07:29,158 Hmm. 203 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:33,955 * * 204 00:07:33,996 --> 00:07:35,123 - Huh. 205 00:07:35,164 --> 00:07:37,166 I thought she was gonna be nice. 206 00:07:37,208 --> 00:07:40,670 I mean, she gave me this beautiful necklace. 207 00:07:40,712 --> 00:07:43,464 * * 208 00:07:43,506 --> 00:07:46,384 - You should take that off. 209 00:07:46,426 --> 00:07:48,177 - It doesn't want me to. 210 00:07:48,219 --> 00:07:49,971 * * 211 00:07:50,012 --> 00:07:52,140 Okay, so I told the Spirit board the situation, 212 00:07:52,181 --> 00:07:54,809 and they refused to reinstate our hours. 213 00:07:54,851 --> 00:07:56,602 [all groaning] 214 00:07:56,644 --> 00:07:58,354 Listen, listen, there's still hope. 215 00:07:58,396 --> 00:08:00,231 Look, all we need to qualify is 216 00:08:00,273 --> 00:08:03,443 15,000 new volunteer hours before midnight tonight. 217 00:08:03,484 --> 00:08:05,153 - That's impossible. 218 00:08:05,194 --> 00:08:07,947 - Well, if we can't win, can we at least prank them back? 219 00:08:07,989 --> 00:08:09,949 - No, no, no, no, no. 220 00:08:09,991 --> 00:08:12,660 We're not wasting time on another prank. 221 00:08:12,702 --> 00:08:15,079 Come on, think, think. 222 00:08:15,121 --> 00:08:19,792 How do we get 15,000 volunteer hours in one day? 223 00:08:21,377 --> 00:08:24,255 - Where's that Gil kid? He always had great ideas. 224 00:08:26,716 --> 00:08:27,925 What? 225 00:08:27,967 --> 00:08:29,677 I had a doctor's appointment yesterday. 226 00:08:29,719 --> 00:08:31,429 What happened? 227 00:08:31,471 --> 00:08:34,265 [phone rings] 228 00:08:34,307 --> 00:08:36,184 - No. 229 00:08:36,225 --> 00:08:38,770 - Damn. - Come on, one idea. 230 00:08:38,811 --> 00:08:41,064 - Oof, this is hard. 231 00:08:41,105 --> 00:08:42,356 - When I was in high school, 232 00:08:42,398 --> 00:08:46,277 we just solved everything with a dance contest. 233 00:08:46,319 --> 00:08:47,945 - Slater, that's it. 234 00:08:47,987 --> 00:08:52,575 Look, 12 hours times the entire student body 235 00:08:52,617 --> 00:08:55,536 of 1,250 students 236 00:08:55,578 --> 00:08:59,874 equals exactly 15,000 hours. 237 00:08:59,916 --> 00:09:02,627 both: A 12-hour dance-a-thon for charity! 238 00:09:02,668 --> 00:09:04,796 - Okay, everyone, we need to start at noon 239 00:09:04,837 --> 00:09:06,672 and dance for 12 hours straight. 240 00:09:06,714 --> 00:09:08,132 No one can even stop for a minute. 241 00:09:08,174 --> 00:09:09,967 - I will make it mandatory. 242 00:09:10,009 --> 00:09:13,388 I will also be DJ. I took Diplo's master class. 243 00:09:13,429 --> 00:09:15,348 Well, I watched an ad for it. 244 00:09:15,390 --> 00:09:18,267 - Okay, guys, we're gonna pull this off in a way that Valley 245 00:09:18,309 --> 00:09:19,852 never saw coming-- 246 00:09:19,894 --> 00:09:21,938 by working hard and playing by the rules. 247 00:09:21,979 --> 00:09:23,815 Let's go, Bayside! 248 00:09:23,856 --> 00:09:27,985 [cheers and applause] 249 00:09:28,027 --> 00:09:31,697 - I am so proud of these kids for being so responsible. 250 00:09:31,739 --> 00:09:34,325 - Yeah, and it's cool that they're doing it the right way 251 00:09:34,367 --> 00:09:37,078 and not, like, pranking the principal or something. 252 00:09:39,539 --> 00:09:41,165 - You wouldn't want to go prank 253 00:09:41,207 --> 00:09:43,000 that evil Valley bitch, would you? 254 00:09:43,042 --> 00:09:44,752 - Oh, so glad you said it first. 255 00:09:44,794 --> 00:09:47,505 * * 256 00:09:47,547 --> 00:09:48,881 - Chloe? 257 00:09:48,923 --> 00:09:52,009 Hey, I'm sorry I didn't text you back last night. 258 00:09:52,051 --> 00:09:54,011 Daisy was upset, so we ate ice cream 259 00:09:54,053 --> 00:09:55,346 and watched her favorite chick flick-- 260 00:09:55,388 --> 00:09:57,640 the confirmation hearing of Sonia Sotomayor. 261 00:09:57,682 --> 00:09:58,850 [both chuckle] 262 00:09:58,891 --> 00:10:03,688 - Uh, so are you going to the dance later? 263 00:10:03,730 --> 00:10:07,984 - Uh, oh, I-- I don't know. 264 00:10:08,025 --> 00:10:09,193 - You don't have a choice. 265 00:10:09,235 --> 00:10:10,945 Don't be all like, "Oh, I don't know." 266 00:10:10,987 --> 00:10:12,780 You're going! 267 00:10:12,822 --> 00:10:14,866 - God, it's going to be so tragic 268 00:10:14,907 --> 00:10:16,325 with all the straight kids flossing 269 00:10:16,367 --> 00:10:18,745 to the "Friends" theme song or whatever it is they do. 270 00:10:18,786 --> 00:10:20,538 - Mm. - Uh... 271 00:10:20,580 --> 00:10:24,792 if you ever need a break, maybe save me a dance? 272 00:10:24,834 --> 00:10:26,252 - Oh, I-- 273 00:10:26,294 --> 00:10:28,379 [British accent] I shall reserve a spot for you 274 00:10:28,421 --> 00:10:29,964 on my dance card, m'lady. 275 00:10:30,006 --> 00:10:33,051 - Oh, Aisha, thank God I found you! 276 00:10:33,092 --> 00:10:35,136 There's an urgent call from your... 277 00:10:35,178 --> 00:10:36,888 What's something everyone has? 278 00:10:36,929 --> 00:10:38,973 Hedge-maze trimmer. - [normal voice] Oh, yes. 279 00:10:39,015 --> 00:10:45,688 * * 280 00:10:45,730 --> 00:10:49,358 Thank you. When I'm nervous, my flirting gets real weird. 281 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:51,110 Was I doing a "Bridgerton" voice? 282 00:10:51,152 --> 00:10:54,572 - Yeah, I could sense you were about to tip an invisible cap. 283 00:10:54,614 --> 00:10:56,074 - [groans softly] 284 00:10:56,115 --> 00:10:58,951 I might have a little bit of a crush. 285 00:10:58,993 --> 00:11:03,915 And it might kind of be my first crush like this. 286 00:11:03,956 --> 00:11:05,917 - Oh, wow. 287 00:11:05,958 --> 00:11:08,086 - Oh, I mean, on someone I know. 288 00:11:08,127 --> 00:11:10,630 There was Sue Bird, Janelle Monáe, 289 00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:13,091 this headless mannequin at PacSun 290 00:11:13,132 --> 00:11:15,093 wearing board shorts and a bikini top. 291 00:11:15,134 --> 00:11:16,761 Oh. 292 00:11:16,803 --> 00:11:19,430 You know, you're kind of 293 00:11:19,472 --> 00:11:21,391 the first person that I've talked to about this. 294 00:11:21,432 --> 00:11:24,143 - Well, I'm honored but not surprised. 295 00:11:24,185 --> 00:11:26,270 I've always been an amazing listener. 296 00:11:26,312 --> 00:11:30,274 - [chuckles] - And Chloe's really cool. 297 00:11:30,316 --> 00:11:32,902 - Yeah, but... 298 00:11:32,944 --> 00:11:34,404 going to the dance with her 299 00:11:34,445 --> 00:11:36,781 or even walking down the hall with her 300 00:11:36,823 --> 00:11:39,409 feels like an announcement that I'm not ready to make. 301 00:11:39,450 --> 00:11:41,452 - Well, you'll know when you're ready. 302 00:11:41,494 --> 00:11:43,704 And if you do decide to dance with Chloe tonight, 303 00:11:43,746 --> 00:11:45,998 no one's gonna be watching because-- 304 00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:47,458 and I don't want to be giving it away-- 305 00:11:47,500 --> 00:11:49,419 my dress will be alive. 306 00:11:49,460 --> 00:11:56,384 * * 307 00:11:58,928 --> 00:12:00,346 - I can't believe the security guard 308 00:12:00,388 --> 00:12:01,931 bought that we were lunch ladies. 309 00:12:01,973 --> 00:12:03,266 - You really sold it. 310 00:12:03,307 --> 00:12:04,642 I didn't realize you knew so much 311 00:12:04,684 --> 00:12:07,270 about the process of manufacturing chicken nuggets. 312 00:12:07,311 --> 00:12:09,647 Okay, now, we don't have much time. 313 00:12:09,689 --> 00:12:11,315 - I still think we should've done my idea. 314 00:12:11,357 --> 00:12:13,192 You know how many joke shops I had to go to 315 00:12:13,234 --> 00:12:14,652 to get this trick pen? 316 00:12:14,694 --> 00:12:17,196 Two, but the prices were higher at the second one, 317 00:12:17,238 --> 00:12:18,656 so then I had to drive back to the first. 318 00:12:18,698 --> 00:12:20,575 - Slater, a leaky pen is not good enough. 319 00:12:20,616 --> 00:12:23,077 We need to do real damage. 320 00:12:23,119 --> 00:12:25,288 Okay, I'm in her iCal right now, 321 00:12:25,329 --> 00:12:27,457 moving all her meetings by a half hour. 322 00:12:27,498 --> 00:12:29,208 She's gonna be late to things for months, 323 00:12:29,250 --> 00:12:32,545 except her niece's wedding, where she'll arrive 324 00:12:32,587 --> 00:12:36,090 three hours early and be forced to set up the chairs. 325 00:12:36,132 --> 00:12:39,343 - Ooh, that--that's good right there. 326 00:12:39,385 --> 00:12:41,304 Yeah, you-- you got her on that one. 327 00:12:41,345 --> 00:12:43,347 - Oh, we got to get out of here. 328 00:12:43,389 --> 00:12:45,183 She has a meeting with the superintendent. 329 00:12:45,224 --> 00:12:48,394 - Brenda, I'm back from that hellhole. 330 00:12:48,436 --> 00:12:55,359 * * 331 00:13:00,073 --> 00:13:03,159 [both grunt] 332 00:13:03,201 --> 00:13:05,578 - Okay, if it--if there was a rat skeleton 333 00:13:05,620 --> 00:13:08,456 three inches from your hand, would you want to know? 334 00:13:11,417 --> 00:13:13,294 - We're lucky Lexi got a partnership 335 00:13:13,336 --> 00:13:15,046 with the SpaceX energy drink. 336 00:13:15,088 --> 00:13:16,631 Can't believe they sent us so many free cases. 337 00:13:16,672 --> 00:13:19,008 - Yeah. Manufactured in... 338 00:13:19,050 --> 00:13:22,136 "Help us. We're in a sweat shop orbiting Earth." 339 00:13:22,178 --> 00:13:25,223 [phone rings] - No. 340 00:13:25,264 --> 00:13:27,517 Why do you want to talk to that monster anyways? 341 00:13:27,558 --> 00:13:29,477 - I just have a lot of questions. 342 00:13:29,519 --> 00:13:32,563 Like, if you were an evil mole with no real emotion, 343 00:13:32,605 --> 00:13:34,607 then why would you want me to tell my mom about you? 344 00:13:34,649 --> 00:13:36,067 - To signal that my feelings are serious 345 00:13:36,109 --> 00:13:37,402 so that you obsess over it, 346 00:13:37,443 --> 00:13:38,903 impairing your decision-making abilities 347 00:13:38,945 --> 00:13:42,907 and leading you to name an incompetent idiot Spirit Czar. 348 00:13:42,949 --> 00:13:44,826 - Whoa. 349 00:13:44,867 --> 00:13:48,371 Of course. Mac, I don't need Gil to get answers. 350 00:13:48,413 --> 00:13:49,539 I just need you. 351 00:13:49,580 --> 00:13:51,374 You and Gil are the same kind of monster. 352 00:13:51,416 --> 00:13:54,085 - What? No, he's a bad monster. 353 00:13:54,127 --> 00:13:56,671 I'm a fun monster like Elmo 354 00:13:56,713 --> 00:13:58,840 or Grover or James Corden. 355 00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:00,717 - Are you gonna help me or not? 356 00:14:00,758 --> 00:14:03,553 - Why? It's not gonna change what he did. 357 00:14:03,594 --> 00:14:06,806 - Yeah, but if he actually liked me, 358 00:14:06,848 --> 00:14:09,100 it means he tricked me 5% less, 359 00:14:09,142 --> 00:14:12,478 and that'll make me feel 5% less stupid. 360 00:14:15,106 --> 00:14:17,066 - All right, I'll help you. 361 00:14:17,108 --> 00:14:19,986 [phone rings] 362 00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,237 No. 363 00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:27,493 - Okay, everybody, the only rules are-- 364 00:14:27,535 --> 00:14:30,288 number one, you must always be dancing, 365 00:14:30,329 --> 00:14:32,915 even during the bathroom breaks. 366 00:14:32,957 --> 00:14:34,667 Number two, have fun out there. 367 00:14:34,709 --> 00:14:36,002 I'm just kidding. 368 00:14:36,044 --> 00:14:39,088 I don't care if it's fun! It's for Spirit! 369 00:14:39,130 --> 00:14:41,132 - [clears throat] - Oh, this is Barry. 370 00:14:41,174 --> 00:14:42,800 Barry is from the Spirit Association. 371 00:14:42,842 --> 00:14:46,054 He's here to make sure that everything is aboveboard. 372 00:14:46,095 --> 00:14:49,182 Do not try to bribe Barry. 373 00:14:49,223 --> 00:14:51,142 He's independently wealthy. 374 00:14:51,184 --> 00:14:53,936 He's just doing this as a post-retirement gig 375 00:14:53,978 --> 00:14:56,105 because he loves rules. 376 00:14:56,147 --> 00:14:57,523 All right. 377 00:14:57,565 --> 00:15:01,652 Let the dance-a-thon begin. [whistle blows] 378 00:15:01,694 --> 00:15:03,404 [cheers and applause] 379 00:15:03,446 --> 00:15:06,532 [upbeat dance music plays] 380 00:15:06,574 --> 00:15:13,539 * * 381 00:15:19,337 --> 00:15:20,963 - Whoo! We're definitely going to make it. 382 00:15:21,005 --> 00:15:24,467 I'm not tired at all! - It's been 10 seconds. 383 00:15:24,509 --> 00:15:26,969 * * 384 00:15:27,011 --> 00:15:29,097 - * Let's go to work * 385 00:15:29,138 --> 00:15:30,348 * To the left * 386 00:15:30,390 --> 00:15:31,474 * Take it back now, y'all * 387 00:15:31,516 --> 00:15:33,351 - Wow, I've never seen someone 388 00:15:33,393 --> 00:15:35,561 so confidently do the Cha Cha Slide wrong. 389 00:15:35,603 --> 00:15:37,355 - Oh, I don't follow instructions. 390 00:15:37,397 --> 00:15:39,607 My IKEA bookshelf is a wooden board 391 00:15:39,649 --> 00:15:42,026 with exposed nails that I impale my books on. 392 00:15:42,068 --> 00:15:44,570 - Oh, you think you're badass? 393 00:15:44,612 --> 00:15:46,572 I still haven't passed my driver's ed test 394 00:15:46,614 --> 00:15:48,574 'cause I refuse to let a sign tell me what to do. 395 00:15:48,616 --> 00:15:50,952 Yield? You yield. - Yeah. 396 00:15:50,993 --> 00:15:53,413 - * Come on cha-cha now, y'all * 397 00:15:53,454 --> 00:15:56,249 - Hey, okay, so why did Gil tell me 398 00:15:56,290 --> 00:15:57,750 his most embarrassing secret, 399 00:15:57,792 --> 00:15:59,919 like how he pooped his pants in kindergarten? 400 00:15:59,961 --> 00:16:01,587 - Why is every Disney character an orphan? 401 00:16:01,629 --> 00:16:03,381 Sharing a sad fact about his past 402 00:16:03,423 --> 00:16:05,174 immediately makes you sympathize with him. 403 00:16:05,216 --> 00:16:07,677 - Okay, then why did Gil give me this bracelet 404 00:16:07,719 --> 00:16:09,762 that's been in his family for generations? 405 00:16:09,804 --> 00:16:13,474 Bracelet that's been in his family for generations. 406 00:16:13,516 --> 00:16:15,810 It was a recording device? - Mm-hmm. 407 00:16:15,852 --> 00:16:17,478 - There's got to be something else. 408 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,021 Come on, conga us out of here. 409 00:16:19,063 --> 00:16:21,524 - * Left foot this time * 410 00:16:21,566 --> 00:16:22,900 * Charlie Brown * 411 00:16:22,942 --> 00:16:26,404 - [groans] How long do we have to hide up here? 412 00:16:26,446 --> 00:16:27,989 My Fitbit said I was supposed to do 413 00:16:28,030 --> 00:16:29,866 jumping jacks ten minutes ago. 414 00:16:29,907 --> 00:16:31,826 She's gonna be mad at me. 415 00:16:31,868 --> 00:16:34,078 - We'll stay up here all day if we have to. 416 00:16:34,120 --> 00:16:37,123 It'll all be worth it when that mean lady's life 417 00:16:37,165 --> 00:16:39,250 is upended by my brilliant prank. 418 00:16:39,292 --> 00:16:41,711 - Brenda, something's wrong with my iCal. 419 00:16:41,753 --> 00:16:43,171 * * 420 00:16:43,212 --> 00:16:45,548 All my meetings are a half hour later for some reason. 421 00:16:45,590 --> 00:16:47,467 Oh, never mind. I fixed it. 422 00:16:53,556 --> 00:16:56,225 - I told you we did it. - Did what? 423 00:16:56,267 --> 00:16:58,102 Get her shirt dirty? 424 00:16:58,144 --> 00:17:00,021 I wanted to destroy her life. 425 00:17:00,063 --> 00:17:02,648 * * 426 00:17:02,690 --> 00:17:03,941 - [sighs] 427 00:17:05,234 --> 00:17:06,486 Oh. 428 00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:09,363 - Pat, why are you half-naked? - Oh... 429 00:17:09,405 --> 00:17:10,990 - My wife is here. 430 00:17:11,032 --> 00:17:13,868 - [gasps] Roger, I knew you were having an affair. 431 00:17:13,910 --> 00:17:15,953 - No, I don't know why she'd do this. 432 00:17:15,995 --> 00:17:17,205 She's crazy. 433 00:17:17,246 --> 00:17:18,831 - Oh, the only person who's crazy is me 434 00:17:18,873 --> 00:17:21,334 for believing that a man could change. 435 00:17:21,375 --> 00:17:24,295 * * 436 00:17:24,337 --> 00:17:26,172 - You had to force my hand, didn't you, Pat? 437 00:17:26,214 --> 00:17:27,507 - No. 438 00:17:27,548 --> 00:17:28,800 - You couldn't let me tell her in my own time. 439 00:17:28,841 --> 00:17:31,427 - No, it was an accident. It was the pen. 440 00:17:31,469 --> 00:17:35,473 - No more excuses. It's over, Pat. 441 00:17:35,515 --> 00:17:37,934 - Roger, no! But I love you! 442 00:17:37,975 --> 00:17:40,603 It was the pen! 443 00:17:40,645 --> 00:17:42,355 The pen. 444 00:17:42,397 --> 00:17:44,107 - You're a genius. - Yes. 445 00:17:44,148 --> 00:17:45,316 - Now let's get out of here. 446 00:17:45,358 --> 00:17:48,903 - Oh, wait, Jessie... 447 00:17:48,945 --> 00:17:51,864 don't be scared, but... 448 00:17:51,906 --> 00:17:54,575 there's a rat skull in your hair. 449 00:17:56,828 --> 00:18:03,751 * * 450 00:18:06,254 --> 00:18:08,005 - I'm getting tired. - No, you're not. 451 00:18:08,047 --> 00:18:09,590 Here, have some of my water. 452 00:18:09,632 --> 00:18:12,218 It tastes gross, but the more I drink it, the better I feel. 453 00:18:12,260 --> 00:18:14,679 - Bro, this is an energy drink. It's full of caffeine. 454 00:18:14,721 --> 00:18:16,472 - Caffeine, that's the stuff 455 00:18:16,514 --> 00:18:18,307 my mom doesn't let us keep in the house. 456 00:18:18,349 --> 00:18:20,017 - I-I see why. 457 00:18:20,059 --> 00:18:22,395 - Hey, my heart feels cool, 458 00:18:22,437 --> 00:18:24,188 like it's trying to escape. 459 00:18:24,230 --> 00:18:26,649 Okay. - Okay. 460 00:18:26,691 --> 00:18:29,569 * * 461 00:18:29,610 --> 00:18:32,113 - Oh, it's just snakeskin. 462 00:18:32,155 --> 00:18:34,699 I was scared when you said it would be alive. 463 00:18:34,741 --> 00:18:38,453 - Yeah, just snakeskin. [chuckles] 464 00:18:38,494 --> 00:18:41,873 Shh. [chuckles] 465 00:18:41,914 --> 00:18:44,333 So I saw you dancing with Chloe. 466 00:18:44,375 --> 00:18:45,543 Looked like you were having fun. 467 00:18:45,585 --> 00:18:47,628 - We are. It's been chill. 468 00:18:47,670 --> 00:18:49,505 Mostly just dancing in a big group. 469 00:18:49,547 --> 00:18:51,591 - So no slow dances? 470 00:18:51,632 --> 00:18:54,594 - I want to, but I keep getting nervous 471 00:18:54,635 --> 00:18:56,596 and making up an excuse whenever a slow song starts. 472 00:18:56,637 --> 00:18:57,972 I told her I thought 473 00:18:58,014 --> 00:19:00,475 "All My Life" by K-Ci & JoJo is overrated. 474 00:19:00,516 --> 00:19:02,310 - And she bought that? 475 00:19:05,021 --> 00:19:08,524 [gasps] Look, he was doodling my name 476 00:19:08,566 --> 00:19:10,485 and he even drew little hearts over the I's. 477 00:19:10,526 --> 00:19:12,361 That's got to be good. - Oh, that's really bad. 478 00:19:12,403 --> 00:19:13,821 He was practicing your signature. 479 00:19:13,863 --> 00:19:15,031 - [sighs] 480 00:19:15,073 --> 00:19:16,365 * * 481 00:19:16,407 --> 00:19:17,408 - [gasps] 482 00:19:17,450 --> 00:19:24,582 * * 483 00:19:27,085 --> 00:19:29,462 We're good. - Okay. 484 00:19:29,504 --> 00:19:31,214 All right, what else? 485 00:19:31,255 --> 00:19:33,633 [gasps] 486 00:19:33,674 --> 00:19:36,803 Oh, my God, look, he was going to surprise me 487 00:19:36,844 --> 00:19:38,304 with tickets to my favorite comedy show. 488 00:19:38,346 --> 00:19:40,640 - Uh, I would hardly call a live taping 489 00:19:40,681 --> 00:19:42,725 of "Pod Save America" a comedy show. 490 00:19:42,767 --> 00:19:45,978 - But look at the date, it's weeks after the Spirit contest. 491 00:19:46,020 --> 00:19:48,272 This proves it-- his feelings were real. 492 00:19:48,314 --> 00:19:49,690 - Oh, Daisy, come on. 493 00:19:49,732 --> 00:19:51,526 This is a textbook diversion tactic. 494 00:19:51,567 --> 00:19:53,236 You always keep tickets to a future event 495 00:19:53,277 --> 00:19:55,822 in your back pocket in case your target gets suspicious. 496 00:19:55,863 --> 00:19:57,740 I'm supposed to go the 2028 Olympics 497 00:19:57,782 --> 00:19:59,158 with, like, three different girls. 498 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,161 - Okay, fine, but there's got to be something else. 499 00:20:02,203 --> 00:20:05,123 * * 500 00:20:05,164 --> 00:20:06,582 What the-- 501 00:20:06,624 --> 00:20:08,793 Is this his phone? 502 00:20:13,881 --> 00:20:16,175 - Oh, snap. This is his real phone. 503 00:20:16,217 --> 00:20:17,927 Let's see what we got. 504 00:20:19,178 --> 00:20:23,266 Oh, this is weird. Look at his email drafts. 505 00:20:23,307 --> 00:20:25,852 - "I hope you can forgive me, and in spite of everything, 506 00:20:25,893 --> 00:20:27,645 "maybe one day we can be together. 507 00:20:27,687 --> 00:20:29,605 Yours, Jake Takamura." 508 00:20:29,647 --> 00:20:30,940 - Did he sign with his real name? 509 00:20:30,982 --> 00:20:33,651 - Yeah. Okay, so what's the explanation? 510 00:20:33,693 --> 00:20:35,445 - There isn't one. 511 00:20:35,486 --> 00:20:37,405 Once a mark knows you by your alias, 512 00:20:37,447 --> 00:20:39,115 you never give up your real name. 513 00:20:39,157 --> 00:20:40,658 There's a woman in Pasadena 514 00:20:40,700 --> 00:20:42,744 who thinks she's married to Donnie Dingleberry. 515 00:20:42,785 --> 00:20:45,288 These emails are legit. 516 00:20:45,329 --> 00:20:48,916 - Okay, so that means... 517 00:20:48,958 --> 00:20:52,670 he did care about me? - Yeah, I guess. 518 00:20:52,712 --> 00:20:55,173 That's good, though, right? 519 00:20:55,214 --> 00:20:56,883 That's what you wanted. 520 00:20:56,924 --> 00:21:01,220 * * 521 00:21:01,262 --> 00:21:03,723 - * Beat down, make it better * 522 00:21:03,765 --> 00:21:05,933 * On the floor, we make it better * 523 00:21:05,975 --> 00:21:08,311 * On the floor, we make it better * 524 00:21:08,352 --> 00:21:10,688 * Break that beat down * 525 00:21:10,730 --> 00:21:11,981 * Make it better * 526 00:21:12,023 --> 00:21:13,858 * On the floor, we make it better * 527 00:21:13,900 --> 00:21:17,487 [Michael Bolton's "How Am I Supposed to Live Without You"] 528 00:21:17,528 --> 00:21:18,488 - Want to dance? 529 00:21:18,529 --> 00:21:21,157 * * 530 00:21:21,199 --> 00:21:22,742 - [British accent] 'Twould be an honor. 531 00:21:22,784 --> 00:21:24,577 [chuckles awkwardly] 532 00:21:24,619 --> 00:21:26,621 [clears throat, normal voice] I mean, yes. 533 00:21:26,662 --> 00:21:28,039 That would be nice. 534 00:21:28,081 --> 00:21:30,583 - * I could hardly believe it * 535 00:21:30,625 --> 00:21:34,420 * When I heard the news today * 536 00:21:34,462 --> 00:21:39,175 * I had to come and get it straight from you * 537 00:21:39,217 --> 00:21:41,844 - I know we're always ragging on how stupid we were 538 00:21:41,886 --> 00:21:44,389 back in high school, but maybe we weren't all wrong. 539 00:21:44,430 --> 00:21:46,391 - * Swept your heart away * 540 00:21:46,432 --> 00:21:48,309 - Dancing can solve problems. 541 00:21:48,351 --> 00:21:50,103 Pranks are hilarious. 542 00:21:50,144 --> 00:21:52,688 Even our clothes are back in style again. 543 00:21:52,730 --> 00:21:56,109 The theme for the next Met ball is the TGIF lineup. 544 00:21:56,150 --> 00:21:58,778 - Yeah, I guess if you give it enough time, 545 00:21:58,820 --> 00:22:00,405 everything comes back around. 546 00:22:00,446 --> 00:22:01,948 - * Oh * 547 00:22:01,989 --> 00:22:05,034 - Well, at least the good things. 548 00:22:05,076 --> 00:22:07,328 * * 549 00:22:07,370 --> 00:22:10,039 - * Tell me, how am I... * 550 00:22:10,081 --> 00:22:14,961 - Um, my tire... I need to check it. 551 00:22:15,002 --> 00:22:19,006 - * Now that I've been loving you so long * 552 00:22:19,048 --> 00:22:21,259 - I see a yearbook cover! [camera shutter clicks] 553 00:22:21,300 --> 00:22:22,510 So cute! 554 00:22:22,552 --> 00:22:25,346 - Oh, my God. Are you okay? 555 00:22:25,388 --> 00:22:26,389 - I'm fine. I'm fine. 556 00:22:26,431 --> 00:22:28,057 I can Kerri Strug it. 557 00:22:28,099 --> 00:22:30,184 - [groans] - Oh, no, Spencer. 558 00:22:30,226 --> 00:22:32,311 Spence, can you hear me? 559 00:22:32,353 --> 00:22:34,981 Listen to my voice. Who is the president? 560 00:22:35,022 --> 00:22:38,484 - Of the Academy? Laura Dern. - She lost! 561 00:22:38,526 --> 00:22:41,112 It's casting director David Rubin. 562 00:22:41,154 --> 00:22:42,864 Oh, God, he's concussed. 563 00:22:42,905 --> 00:22:44,824 - But we need every single student. 564 00:22:44,866 --> 00:22:47,702 Hey, how about we tie strings to him, 565 00:22:47,744 --> 00:22:50,913 and I Pinocchio his little body from the ceiling? 566 00:22:50,955 --> 00:22:55,460 That should--I mean, his health is my first priority. 567 00:22:55,501 --> 00:22:57,670 Let's just get you to the hospital. 568 00:22:57,712 --> 00:22:59,005 - Oh, God. - [groans] 569 00:22:59,047 --> 00:23:00,590 - Somebody order an Uber Black. 570 00:23:00,631 --> 00:23:03,509 - Uh, it seems like you need some space. 571 00:23:03,551 --> 00:23:05,678 - Uh... [groans] 572 00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:07,346 - This is a disaster. 573 00:23:07,388 --> 00:23:09,307 Without Spencer, we won't qualify. 574 00:23:09,348 --> 00:23:13,019 - Yeah! One hour left and only 1,249 dancers. 575 00:23:13,061 --> 00:23:15,438 That's one hour short, but if I dance fast enough, 576 00:23:15,480 --> 00:23:17,440 I can look like two people. Watch, it'll be good. 577 00:23:17,482 --> 00:23:21,486 - * How am I supposed to live without you? * 578 00:23:21,527 --> 00:23:24,781 - Oh. - Oh. 579 00:23:24,822 --> 00:23:28,993 [phone rings] 580 00:23:29,035 --> 00:23:31,037 - [sighs] 581 00:23:31,079 --> 00:23:33,456 Hey. 582 00:23:33,498 --> 00:23:36,417 Yeah, we do need to talk. 583 00:23:36,459 --> 00:23:37,919 Can I see you? 584 00:23:42,632 --> 00:23:44,300 - Everybody just keep dancing. I'll think of a plan. 585 00:23:44,342 --> 00:23:46,636 What if we separated the conjoined twins? 586 00:23:46,677 --> 00:23:48,096 - Not on their birthday. 587 00:23:48,137 --> 00:23:50,765 - With enough stage makeup, I could play Spencer. 588 00:23:50,807 --> 00:23:52,058 - But who'd play Lexi? 589 00:23:52,100 --> 00:23:54,268 - You're right-- it's an impossible role 590 00:23:54,310 --> 00:23:58,064 that only exposes an actresses weakness, like Jackie Kennedy. 591 00:23:58,106 --> 00:23:59,607 - [sighs] 592 00:23:59,649 --> 00:24:04,320 * * 593 00:24:04,362 --> 00:24:05,405 - Wow. 594 00:24:06,781 --> 00:24:07,990 Thanks for meeting me. 595 00:24:08,032 --> 00:24:09,659 I just wanted a chance to explain. 596 00:24:09,700 --> 00:24:11,285 - What is there to explain? 597 00:24:11,327 --> 00:24:14,205 You've been lying to me since I met you. 598 00:24:14,247 --> 00:24:17,083 - Well, I have no reason to lie anymore. 599 00:24:17,125 --> 00:24:22,755 And the truth is, you are the best person I've ever met. 600 00:24:22,797 --> 00:24:24,424 I mean, you do community service, 601 00:24:24,465 --> 00:24:25,925 even when it's not for points. 602 00:24:25,967 --> 00:24:30,304 You went to your brother's clarinet recital voluntarily. 603 00:24:30,346 --> 00:24:32,849 And while we sat there listening to his rendition 604 00:24:32,890 --> 00:24:35,435 of "Imagine," which I can respectfully say 605 00:24:35,476 --> 00:24:38,020 is the worst thing that's ever happened to John Lennon, 606 00:24:38,062 --> 00:24:41,649 I looked at you watching him proudly. 607 00:24:41,691 --> 00:24:44,652 And I realized, I want to see the world the way you do. 608 00:24:44,694 --> 00:24:46,946 You bring out the good in people 609 00:24:46,988 --> 00:24:48,823 and make everyone around you better. 610 00:24:48,865 --> 00:24:50,908 - Well, I didn't make you better... 611 00:24:50,950 --> 00:24:52,827 and it sucks. 612 00:24:52,869 --> 00:24:56,164 I thought you were my first real boyfriend. 613 00:24:56,205 --> 00:24:57,915 I thought you were gonna carry my books, 614 00:24:57,957 --> 00:24:59,959 and we'd be cute at dances like this, 615 00:25:00,001 --> 00:25:02,503 but now we never will. 616 00:25:02,545 --> 00:25:05,465 [soft music playing inside] 617 00:25:05,506 --> 00:25:07,925 * * 618 00:25:07,967 --> 00:25:11,137 - Well, at least let me make it up to you. 619 00:25:11,179 --> 00:25:16,225 We can have our first dance right here, right now. 620 00:25:16,267 --> 00:25:19,562 - * I wonder where this road * 621 00:25:19,604 --> 00:25:24,108 * Might carry and take me * 622 00:25:24,150 --> 00:25:30,990 * I wonder how this load might make or break me * 623 00:25:31,032 --> 00:25:33,951 * Following the man that has... * 624 00:25:33,993 --> 00:25:35,578 - Okay, what are we gonna do? 625 00:25:35,620 --> 00:25:37,789 - We could trick Jamie's mom into seducing Barry? 626 00:25:37,830 --> 00:25:39,499 No, but how'd that make Jamie feel? 627 00:25:39,540 --> 00:25:42,460 - Who cares? Barry's doing his final check. 628 00:25:42,502 --> 00:25:44,045 We need an evil Mac scheme. 629 00:25:44,087 --> 00:25:45,588 - Schemes don't have to be evil. 630 00:25:45,630 --> 00:25:47,215 Schindler's list was a scheme. 631 00:25:47,256 --> 00:25:50,385 - Well, maybe we can still be together? 632 00:25:50,426 --> 00:25:51,552 - How? 633 00:25:51,594 --> 00:25:52,970 I don't even really know you. 634 00:25:53,012 --> 00:25:56,891 - But you do. It wasn't all lies. 635 00:25:56,933 --> 00:26:00,228 I know how I feel when I'm around you. 636 00:26:00,269 --> 00:26:02,230 That's real. 637 00:26:02,271 --> 00:26:05,024 You can't say you don't feel it, too. 638 00:26:05,066 --> 00:26:07,693 - I do, but it doesn't matter. 639 00:26:07,735 --> 00:26:09,070 Even if I forgive you, 640 00:26:09,112 --> 00:26:11,406 no one at this school ever will. 641 00:26:11,447 --> 00:26:13,282 - Well, since when do you care what they think? 642 00:26:13,324 --> 00:26:14,909 That's what so special about you. 643 00:26:14,951 --> 00:26:16,702 You're not like the rest of them. 644 00:26:16,744 --> 00:26:18,830 You're not a Bayside kid. 645 00:26:18,871 --> 00:26:23,418 * * 646 00:26:23,459 --> 00:26:26,337 - I'm as Bayside as they come, loser. 647 00:26:26,379 --> 00:26:28,965 [whistle blows] 648 00:26:29,006 --> 00:26:31,384 - Is it over? 649 00:26:31,426 --> 00:26:33,219 - Wait, what's going on? 650 00:26:33,261 --> 00:26:35,638 - This isn't just any school dance. 651 00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:37,598 This is a charity dance-a-thon. 652 00:26:37,640 --> 00:26:39,100 And while you were all like, 653 00:26:39,142 --> 00:26:40,893 "Boo-hoo, my feelings were real," 654 00:26:40,935 --> 00:26:42,228 we were dancing. 655 00:26:42,270 --> 00:26:44,564 You just helped Bayside get the exact number 656 00:26:44,605 --> 00:26:46,941 of hours needed to qualify for Spirit. 657 00:26:46,983 --> 00:26:50,111 - This can't be true. - It is. 658 00:26:50,153 --> 00:26:52,905 You're a registered Bayside student, remember? 659 00:26:52,947 --> 00:26:54,991 - Well, you'll never win. 660 00:26:55,032 --> 00:26:57,535 Our entire school's been preparing for this all year. 661 00:26:57,577 --> 00:26:58,786 - It doesn't matter. 662 00:26:58,828 --> 00:27:01,080 You're going down, asshole. 663 00:27:01,122 --> 00:27:03,833 - Daisy, language. 664 00:27:03,875 --> 00:27:07,003 Just kidding. That was [bleep] awesome! 665 00:27:07,045 --> 00:27:09,589 - Oh. [squeals] 666 00:27:09,630 --> 00:27:11,632 Bye. 667 00:27:11,674 --> 00:27:13,801 [dramatic music] 668 00:27:13,843 --> 00:27:16,179 - Did we make it? 669 00:27:16,220 --> 00:27:19,140 - It is my great pleasure to announce that Bayside 670 00:27:19,182 --> 00:27:21,517 has officially qualified to compete 671 00:27:21,559 --> 00:27:24,479 in the High School Spirit Competition. 672 00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:27,940 [cheers and applause] 673 00:27:27,982 --> 00:27:30,651 - Yes! I'm so excited! 674 00:27:30,693 --> 00:27:32,779 I'm so excited! 675 00:27:32,820 --> 00:27:36,157 I'm so--[retches] 676 00:27:39,327 --> 00:27:41,204 - Hey. 677 00:27:41,245 --> 00:27:43,539 So I was looking through Spencer's camera 678 00:27:43,581 --> 00:27:45,541 and thought I should probably delete these 679 00:27:45,583 --> 00:27:47,085 before I give it back. 680 00:27:50,129 --> 00:27:53,257 [camera beeps] 681 00:27:55,510 --> 00:27:57,887 - We're cute, aren't we? 682 00:27:59,555 --> 00:28:02,392 Don't delete these. 683 00:28:02,433 --> 00:28:05,603 Hey, uh, Chloe, can I talk to you for a second? 684 00:28:07,730 --> 00:28:12,026 Um, I know that it looked like that I'd rather assault someone 685 00:28:12,068 --> 00:28:13,653 than be photographed with you, but-- 686 00:28:13,694 --> 00:28:16,197 - It looked like that because that's what happened. 687 00:28:16,239 --> 00:28:18,991 I'm sorry if I read the vibe wrong. 688 00:28:19,033 --> 00:28:20,827 - You didn't. Um... 689 00:28:20,868 --> 00:28:23,121 I'm bi, and... 690 00:28:23,162 --> 00:28:26,207 I've never said that out loud before. 691 00:28:26,249 --> 00:28:29,836 So, uh, if you're cool with, like... 692 00:28:29,877 --> 00:28:32,755 going at my speed... 693 00:28:32,797 --> 00:28:35,508 I'd really like to keep hanging out with you. 694 00:28:37,510 --> 00:28:38,678 - [British accent] Blimey, 695 00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:40,722 I'd like that a lot, ma'am. 696 00:28:40,763 --> 00:28:42,056 [both chuckle] 697 00:28:42,098 --> 00:28:45,059 [soft music] 698 00:28:45,101 --> 00:28:48,813 * * 699 00:28:48,855 --> 00:28:50,440 - Hey. 700 00:28:54,902 --> 00:28:56,279 You feeling okay? 701 00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:58,781 - I fooled Gil the same way he fooled me, 702 00:28:58,823 --> 00:29:02,660 but I still feel stupid. 703 00:29:02,702 --> 00:29:05,037 - You didn't know. - But I should've. 704 00:29:05,079 --> 00:29:07,039 I wish I can fast-forward through high school 705 00:29:07,081 --> 00:29:09,041 and be a smart, rational adult 706 00:29:09,083 --> 00:29:12,045 with a sensible four-door sedan with radio presets for NPR. 707 00:29:12,086 --> 00:29:13,546 - Daisy, being an adult 708 00:29:13,588 --> 00:29:16,215 doesn't protect you from feeling stupid. 709 00:29:16,257 --> 00:29:18,634 Whether you find out your boyfriend's a mole 710 00:29:18,676 --> 00:29:21,596 or you spend 20 years married to a man who doesn't believe 711 00:29:21,637 --> 00:29:25,058 in vaccines but did eat a fungus to get high... 712 00:29:25,099 --> 00:29:26,851 - Did your husband do that? 713 00:29:26,893 --> 00:29:29,270 - No, all husbands do that. 714 00:29:29,312 --> 00:29:31,314 These examples are universal. - Oh. 715 00:29:31,355 --> 00:29:35,026 - My point is, love is kind of stupid. 716 00:29:35,068 --> 00:29:37,028 It requires you to put yourself out there 717 00:29:37,070 --> 00:29:41,032 knowing there's a chance that it's going to end in disaster. 718 00:29:41,074 --> 00:29:42,909 - So just avoid love at all costs? 719 00:29:42,950 --> 00:29:46,746 - No, just because it's stupid doesn't mean it's not worth it. 720 00:29:46,788 --> 00:29:50,041 Sometimes being stupid is the bravest thing you can do. 721 00:29:50,083 --> 00:29:57,215 * * 722 00:29:59,175 --> 00:30:00,802 - [high-pitched voice] I didn't steal these. 723 00:30:00,843 --> 00:30:02,220 They said I could have them. 724 00:30:02,261 --> 00:30:04,138 - Oh, my God, you are so stupid. 725 00:30:04,180 --> 00:30:11,312 * * 726 00:30:12,563 --> 00:30:14,107 - Whoa. 727 00:30:14,148 --> 00:30:20,279 * *