1 00:00:08,696 --> 00:00:10,364 [cheerful music] 2 00:00:10,406 --> 00:00:11,699 - Morning, DeVante. 3 00:00:11,741 --> 00:00:13,743 Boy, that's one sharp-looking shirt. 4 00:00:13,784 --> 00:00:15,161 - Oh, thanks, Mr. T. 5 00:00:15,202 --> 00:00:19,457 - Just out of curiosity, where did you get it? 6 00:00:19,498 --> 00:00:21,083 - I don't want you to wear this. 7 00:00:21,125 --> 00:00:23,252 - No. I won't, I won't. 8 00:00:23,294 --> 00:00:25,838 - Don't. - I won't. 9 00:00:25,880 --> 00:00:28,507 I want to, though. 10 00:00:28,549 --> 00:00:32,178 Oh, hey, did you really find an abandoned radio station... 11 00:00:32,219 --> 00:00:33,929 - Hey, buddy. I need a favor. 12 00:00:33,971 --> 00:00:35,431 How would you feel about getting a tattoo, 13 00:00:35,473 --> 00:00:37,433 but I don't tell you what it is first? 14 00:00:37,475 --> 00:00:38,893 - No, I'm late for student council, 15 00:00:38,934 --> 00:00:40,352 and I didn't finish my homework 16 00:00:40,394 --> 00:00:42,021 'cause I had to babysit my little brother last night. 17 00:00:42,063 --> 00:00:43,522 - I'm not hearing a no. 18 00:00:43,564 --> 00:00:46,150 - That was literally the first word I said. 19 00:00:46,192 --> 00:00:48,069 Between home stuff and schoolwork 20 00:00:48,110 --> 00:00:49,195 and all my activities, 21 00:00:49,236 --> 00:00:50,946 I have way too much on my plate. 22 00:00:50,988 --> 00:00:53,866 - Well, what if I told you there's a safe, 23 00:00:53,908 --> 00:00:57,703 all-natural way to increase productivity? 24 00:00:58,412 --> 00:01:02,500 - Not on my watch! Are those caffeine pills? 25 00:01:02,541 --> 00:01:04,001 - Yeah. 26 00:01:04,043 --> 00:01:06,796 I use those stolen prescription slips for caffeine pills. 27 00:01:06,837 --> 00:01:08,672 [bell rings] 28 00:01:08,714 --> 00:01:10,466 - Daisy, you can't mess around with that stuff. 29 00:01:10,508 --> 00:01:13,219 Sure, those pills seem like an easy fix. 30 00:01:13,260 --> 00:01:15,179 At first, they're so exciting, 31 00:01:15,221 --> 00:01:17,181 and then it gets even more exciting, 32 00:01:17,223 --> 00:01:18,891 but after that, it gets so scary. 33 00:01:18,933 --> 00:01:20,351 And in the end, 34 00:01:20,393 --> 00:01:22,311 you ruin your girl group shot at a recording contract. 35 00:01:22,353 --> 00:01:24,397 - What? - I get it. 36 00:01:24,438 --> 00:01:28,067 I was you in high school: ambitious, stressed. 37 00:01:28,109 --> 00:01:29,527 I hadn't figured my hair out yet. 38 00:01:29,568 --> 00:01:31,654 I only wish back then that I had someone 39 00:01:31,696 --> 00:01:33,989 like present-day me to guide past me, 40 00:01:34,031 --> 00:01:36,992 but fortunately, you do. It's me. 41 00:01:37,034 --> 00:01:39,829 - You know, I never had a guidance counselor. 42 00:01:39,870 --> 00:01:41,872 Back at Douglas, all they could afford 43 00:01:41,914 --> 00:01:44,125 was an empty room with a Magic 8-Ball in it. 44 00:01:44,166 --> 00:01:46,711 - Why don't you come by my office tomorrow morning? 45 00:01:46,752 --> 00:01:49,338 - Thanks, Dr. Spano. I will. 46 00:01:49,380 --> 00:01:51,549 - Oh, what have we here? 47 00:01:51,590 --> 00:01:53,676 - No! Step away. 48 00:01:53,718 --> 00:01:55,010 - [screams] 49 00:01:55,052 --> 00:01:56,721 [bell rings] 50 00:01:56,762 --> 00:01:58,431 - * When I wake up in the morning * 51 00:01:58,472 --> 00:01:59,849 * Alarm gives out a warning * 52 00:01:59,890 --> 00:02:01,851 * I don't think I'll ever make it on time * 53 00:02:01,892 --> 00:02:03,018 [bell rings] 54 00:02:03,060 --> 00:02:04,395 * By the time I grab my books * 55 00:02:04,437 --> 00:02:05,980 * And I give myself a look * 56 00:02:06,022 --> 00:02:08,024 * I'm at the corner just in time * 57 00:02:08,065 --> 00:02:09,525 [bell rings] 58 00:02:09,567 --> 00:02:11,861 * It's all right, it's all right * 59 00:02:11,902 --> 00:02:13,738 * Saved by the bell, it's all right * 60 00:02:13,779 --> 00:02:15,531 * It's all right, saved by the bell * 61 00:02:15,573 --> 00:02:18,868 * It's all right * 62 00:02:18,909 --> 00:02:23,205 * 'Cause I'm saved by the bell * 63 00:02:23,247 --> 00:02:25,041 [bell rings] 64 00:02:25,082 --> 00:02:26,709 [light music] 65 00:02:26,751 --> 00:02:30,713 - Guys, I know West Beverly is a tough squad. 66 00:02:30,755 --> 00:02:33,716 And sure, we already lost to East Beverly, South Beverly, 67 00:02:33,758 --> 00:02:35,718 and the Beverly Johnson School For Models, 68 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:40,056 but I think tonight is the night we turn it all around. 69 00:02:40,097 --> 00:02:41,557 - Yeah. - All right. 70 00:02:41,599 --> 00:02:43,017 Now, let's hear a few words from your team captain. 71 00:02:43,059 --> 00:02:45,061 Jamie, get in here. 72 00:02:45,102 --> 00:02:46,395 [cheers and applause] 73 00:02:46,437 --> 00:02:48,064 - All right, listen up. Listen up. 74 00:02:48,105 --> 00:02:50,399 This is our moment, okay? 75 00:02:50,441 --> 00:02:53,235 All that hard work, all those two-a-days, 76 00:02:53,277 --> 00:02:54,779 this is why we did it. 77 00:02:54,820 --> 00:02:58,908 So we could go out there tonight 78 00:02:58,949 --> 00:03:01,077 and make 11 new friends. 79 00:03:01,118 --> 00:03:03,412 all: Yes! - Okay? 80 00:03:03,454 --> 00:03:05,164 Winning does not matter. 81 00:03:05,206 --> 00:03:07,541 What matters is having fun, 82 00:03:07,583 --> 00:03:09,960 spending time together, getting some exercise. 83 00:03:10,002 --> 00:03:12,630 And, most importantly, let's not forget 84 00:03:12,671 --> 00:03:15,674 that the players on that other team have inner lives 85 00:03:15,716 --> 00:03:19,136 that are just as rich and complicated as our own, 86 00:03:19,178 --> 00:03:20,805 if not more so. 87 00:03:20,846 --> 00:03:22,556 - And it's number 10 on the other team's birthday, 88 00:03:22,598 --> 00:03:24,058 so no one tackle him. 89 00:03:24,100 --> 00:03:26,602 He has to look good for his party tonight at Soho House. 90 00:03:26,644 --> 00:03:28,604 - Great point, Colt, thank you. All right. 91 00:03:28,646 --> 00:03:31,232 Clear eyes, full hearts, full stomachs. 92 00:03:31,273 --> 00:03:32,441 all: Full stomachs! 93 00:03:32,483 --> 00:03:33,442 - Has everyone had their milkshakes? 94 00:03:33,484 --> 00:03:34,902 all: Yeah! - Let's go. 95 00:03:34,944 --> 00:03:36,028 - Let's go. 96 00:03:36,070 --> 00:03:37,238 [cheering] 97 00:03:37,279 --> 00:03:38,572 - Let's make some plans! - Yeah! 98 00:03:38,614 --> 00:03:40,574 - Whoo! - Whoo! 99 00:03:40,616 --> 00:03:42,785 - Hey, let's go get them, champ. 100 00:03:42,827 --> 00:03:45,037 Just remember, if you believe in yourself, 101 00:03:45,079 --> 00:03:46,706 there's no way you can lose. 102 00:03:46,747 --> 00:03:48,958 [air horn blares] - Bayside loses! 103 00:03:48,999 --> 00:03:50,292 - [yells] 104 00:03:50,334 --> 00:03:52,753 - Hey, Bayside, it's number 10's birthday today. 105 00:03:52,795 --> 00:03:55,381 [all cheer] 106 00:03:55,423 --> 00:03:59,677 all: * Happy birthday to you * 107 00:03:59,719 --> 00:04:02,805 - Daisy, I get that you're worried about college, 108 00:04:02,847 --> 00:04:04,640 but you have way too many extracurriculars. 109 00:04:04,682 --> 00:04:06,559 You're president of the Science Club 110 00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:09,061 and the Flat Earth Society? 111 00:04:09,103 --> 00:04:10,479 - There's two sides to every story, 112 00:04:10,521 --> 00:04:13,482 and maybe, just maybe, two sides to this Earth. 113 00:04:13,524 --> 00:04:15,443 - Right. Daisy. 114 00:04:15,484 --> 00:04:19,321 Colleges are not impressed by how many random clubs you join. 115 00:04:19,363 --> 00:04:21,032 They wanna know who you are. 116 00:04:21,073 --> 00:04:22,658 - A fun, normal teen who hasn't had 117 00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:24,702 a moment of relaxation since first grade? 118 00:04:24,744 --> 00:04:28,414 - No, you are student council president, a leader. 119 00:04:28,456 --> 00:04:30,833 Focus on that. There's actually 120 00:04:30,875 --> 00:04:32,835 a very competitive summer leadership program 121 00:04:32,877 --> 00:04:34,378 I think you'd be perfect for. 122 00:04:34,420 --> 00:04:37,715 It's eight weeks of seminars hosted by inspirational women. 123 00:04:37,757 --> 00:04:40,718 Last year's keynote address was delivered in unison 124 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:42,762 by the cast of "Big Little Lies." 125 00:04:42,803 --> 00:04:44,847 - Oh, my god. That sounds amazing. 126 00:04:44,889 --> 00:04:47,516 - And it's a fellowship, which means all expenses paid, 127 00:04:47,558 --> 00:04:49,518 including lodging and airfare to New York, 128 00:04:49,560 --> 00:04:51,854 plus a per diem for bagels. 129 00:04:51,896 --> 00:04:55,691 - But... I can't be away from my family for that long. 130 00:04:55,733 --> 00:04:58,152 - [groans] I get it. 131 00:04:58,194 --> 00:05:00,571 My husband's been in Arizona for the past three months 132 00:05:00,613 --> 00:05:03,616 on a writers' retreat, and it's tough. 133 00:05:03,657 --> 00:05:05,618 - It's not about missing them. 134 00:05:05,659 --> 00:05:07,536 My mom needs me to babysit my brother, 135 00:05:07,578 --> 00:05:08,954 and I usually get a summer job. 136 00:05:08,996 --> 00:05:12,416 - Oh. Well, that's different. 137 00:05:12,458 --> 00:05:16,295 Daisy, I don't know anything about your family situation, 138 00:05:16,337 --> 00:05:17,922 but I do know about being a mom, 139 00:05:17,963 --> 00:05:20,925 and all moms want the best for their kids' future. 140 00:05:20,966 --> 00:05:22,468 Just talk to her. 141 00:05:22,510 --> 00:05:23,719 Look over the application together, 142 00:05:23,761 --> 00:05:25,429 and maybe she'll sign the permission slip. 143 00:05:25,471 --> 00:05:28,974 - Or what if, instead, I threw the application into the wind, 144 00:05:29,016 --> 00:05:31,143 and if she finds it, it's God's will? 145 00:05:31,185 --> 00:05:33,354 [light music] 146 00:05:33,396 --> 00:05:35,439 * * 147 00:05:35,481 --> 00:05:36,774 - Hey, Coach. You got a sec? 148 00:05:36,816 --> 00:05:38,484 - Sure. Just taking a little soup break. 149 00:05:38,526 --> 00:05:40,444 What's up? 150 00:05:42,488 --> 00:05:44,865 - Am I the only one who cares that our team is trash? 151 00:05:44,907 --> 00:05:46,200 I mean, after we lost the other night, 152 00:05:46,242 --> 00:05:48,911 Jamie and the guys celebrated with pizza 153 00:05:48,953 --> 00:05:51,622 and wrote thank-you notes to the team that beat us. 154 00:05:51,664 --> 00:05:52,957 - Yeah, well, these Bayside kids 155 00:05:52,998 --> 00:05:55,251 weren't exactly raised to have a killer instinct. 156 00:05:55,292 --> 00:05:56,502 - Well, I was. 157 00:05:56,544 --> 00:05:58,003 In my house, we don't celebrate losing. 158 00:05:58,045 --> 00:06:01,382 Like my dad always says, "Pizza is for winners." 159 00:06:01,424 --> 00:06:03,467 - Hey, my dad was in the army. 160 00:06:03,509 --> 00:06:05,219 He'd turn my room into an obstacle course, 161 00:06:05,261 --> 00:06:07,138 and I had to get a good time, or else I couldn't go to sleep. 162 00:06:07,179 --> 00:06:09,515 - So if you get it, why aren't you trying to fix it? 163 00:06:09,557 --> 00:06:10,933 - How? 164 00:06:10,975 --> 00:06:12,351 You're the only person on the team that isn't 165 00:06:12,393 --> 00:06:13,936 a conscientious objector to tackling. 166 00:06:13,978 --> 00:06:16,564 One person can't save a whole team, Aisha. 167 00:06:16,605 --> 00:06:18,733 - But one person can tank a team. 168 00:06:18,774 --> 00:06:21,569 Jamie's pep talks are killing us. 169 00:06:21,610 --> 00:06:24,989 - Look, Aisha. I already made him backup QB. 170 00:06:25,031 --> 00:06:26,907 I can't take away his pep talks, too. 171 00:06:26,949 --> 00:06:29,618 It'll crush him. - Fine. 172 00:06:29,660 --> 00:06:31,495 If you aren't gonna do anything about it, 173 00:06:31,537 --> 00:06:33,164 I guess I'll just have to do it myself. 174 00:06:33,205 --> 00:06:36,167 - Hey, don't yell at me. I'm a teacher. 175 00:06:36,208 --> 00:06:38,711 Well, not an actual teacher. They-- 176 00:06:38,753 --> 00:06:41,088 you know, gym teachers are in a separate union, 177 00:06:41,130 --> 00:06:42,673 which I'm also not in 178 00:06:42,715 --> 00:06:45,051 'cause the paperwork was a little confusing, but... 179 00:06:45,092 --> 00:06:47,428 - I gotta go. - Good talk. 180 00:06:47,470 --> 00:06:50,431 [light music] 181 00:06:50,473 --> 00:06:54,852 * * 182 00:06:56,353 --> 00:06:57,688 - Hey, Mom. - Hello. 183 00:06:57,730 --> 00:06:59,690 You have reached Cronket Wireless customer service. 184 00:06:59,732 --> 00:07:01,692 How can I help you? Mm-hmm. 185 00:07:01,734 --> 00:07:03,861 One second, sir. I have to talk to my manager. 186 00:07:03,903 --> 00:07:05,112 [sighs] 187 00:07:05,154 --> 00:07:07,323 Que te pasa, mijita? Wait. 188 00:07:07,365 --> 00:07:08,991 It's too quiet out there. 189 00:07:09,033 --> 00:07:11,160 Can you make sure that Hector's not doing something crazy? 190 00:07:11,202 --> 00:07:13,662 - I'm on it. 191 00:07:13,704 --> 00:07:15,623 Hector, no! - What? 192 00:07:15,664 --> 00:07:18,167 He poisoned the villagers' water supply. 193 00:07:20,586 --> 00:07:21,837 - Gracias, mijita. 194 00:07:25,549 --> 00:07:27,968 Was there something else? 195 00:07:28,010 --> 00:07:29,637 - No. 196 00:07:29,678 --> 00:07:31,138 - Hello, sir. 197 00:07:31,180 --> 00:07:34,767 My manager suggested that we do a remote system reset. 198 00:07:34,809 --> 00:07:36,560 Yes, please stand by. 199 00:07:36,602 --> 00:07:38,688 That's not a real thing we can do. 200 00:07:38,729 --> 00:07:41,357 [mellow music] 201 00:07:41,399 --> 00:07:43,275 * * 202 00:07:43,317 --> 00:07:44,819 - Hey, Jamie, can we talk? 203 00:07:44,860 --> 00:07:46,946 - Sure, I'll start. 204 00:07:46,987 --> 00:07:49,281 Have you ever noticed how all M&Ms taste exactly the same 205 00:07:49,323 --> 00:07:51,242 except when they're in a Skittles bag? 206 00:07:51,283 --> 00:07:53,536 - Okay, maybe I'll start. 207 00:07:53,577 --> 00:07:56,956 Look, we all love your pep talks. 208 00:07:56,997 --> 00:07:59,041 I was just wondering if they could be 209 00:07:59,083 --> 00:08:01,585 a little bit more inspirational. 210 00:08:01,627 --> 00:08:03,462 Like, you could talk more about winning 211 00:08:03,504 --> 00:08:06,132 and a little less about the stupid touchy-feely stuff. 212 00:08:06,173 --> 00:08:08,968 - Okay. I see what's going on here. 213 00:08:09,009 --> 00:08:11,137 This is because we went to the dance together, isn't it? 214 00:08:11,178 --> 00:08:12,430 - What? 215 00:08:12,471 --> 00:08:14,140 - Yeah, you're nagging me because you had, like, 216 00:08:14,181 --> 00:08:16,892 a really good time at the dance even though we went as friends, 217 00:08:16,934 --> 00:08:19,186 and now you don't know whether to ask me out or not. 218 00:08:19,228 --> 00:08:20,688 - [scoffs] 219 00:08:20,730 --> 00:08:22,398 No way. What makes you think that? 220 00:08:22,440 --> 00:08:25,609 - I kind of feel the same way. 221 00:08:25,651 --> 00:08:27,445 - You do? 222 00:08:27,486 --> 00:08:29,697 No, this isn't about us. 223 00:08:29,739 --> 00:08:31,365 This is about the fact that our team sucks. 224 00:08:32,950 --> 00:08:34,160 - Wait, so you're not nagging me? 225 00:08:34,201 --> 00:08:36,495 You actually think that my pep talks are bad? 226 00:08:36,537 --> 00:08:38,414 What about the one where I held 227 00:08:38,456 --> 00:08:40,958 a moment of silence so long we missed the entire game? 228 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:43,627 - That one sucked the most. They all suck. 229 00:08:43,669 --> 00:08:46,464 - That one was fantastic. - Wow. 230 00:08:46,505 --> 00:08:49,425 I know what I said, but I gotta give it up. 231 00:08:49,467 --> 00:08:51,302 You look fly. 232 00:08:51,343 --> 00:08:53,387 - Thanks. That means a lot. 233 00:08:53,429 --> 00:08:56,265 Hey, one thing that isn't fly: the price tag. 234 00:08:56,307 --> 00:08:59,727 $1,200 for a shirt? I almost didn't buy it. 235 00:08:59,769 --> 00:09:01,270 - You shouldn't have. 236 00:09:01,312 --> 00:09:03,939 I got mine on Amazon for 40 bucks. 237 00:09:03,981 --> 00:09:07,151 - Oh, my God. What have I done? 238 00:09:07,193 --> 00:09:09,320 - How could you say that? My pep talks are amazing. 239 00:09:09,362 --> 00:09:12,365 They engender a spirit of togetherness. 240 00:09:12,406 --> 00:09:16,994 * * 241 00:09:17,036 --> 00:09:21,290 - I bet I can still return it. 242 00:09:21,332 --> 00:09:24,877 Oh, damn it. 243 00:09:24,919 --> 00:09:30,007 Does anyone have soda water or a tissue? 244 00:09:30,883 --> 00:09:33,427 - See, that's your mistake right there, Samson. 245 00:09:33,469 --> 00:09:35,805 Never let a chick tell you how to do your hair. 246 00:09:37,431 --> 00:09:39,392 Hey, how'd it go with Jamie? 247 00:09:39,433 --> 00:09:41,143 - Great. Well, not great. 248 00:09:41,185 --> 00:09:43,604 Really bad, actually, but it did give me an idea. 249 00:09:43,646 --> 00:09:47,024 All we have to do to motivate the team is piss them off. 250 00:09:47,066 --> 00:09:50,152 - Nice. - What are you reading? 251 00:09:50,194 --> 00:09:52,863 - Oh, this? Incredible book. 252 00:09:52,905 --> 00:09:54,115 If we weren't in a public school, 253 00:09:54,156 --> 00:09:57,034 I'd tell you all about it. 254 00:09:57,076 --> 00:09:59,161 - And now I feel so guilty. 255 00:09:59,203 --> 00:10:02,665 I'm, like, totally freaking out. 256 00:10:02,707 --> 00:10:04,709 Are you guys even listening to me? 257 00:10:04,750 --> 00:10:06,001 - Yeah. You said something about 258 00:10:06,043 --> 00:10:07,670 foraging crops in Singapore. 259 00:10:07,712 --> 00:10:09,630 - No, I said I was scared 260 00:10:09,672 --> 00:10:11,716 because I forged my mom's signature. 261 00:10:11,757 --> 00:10:13,384 - We're saying the same thing. 262 00:10:13,426 --> 00:10:17,388 - I never used to do bad kid stuff at Douglas. 263 00:10:17,430 --> 00:10:19,598 Oh, God. Am I turning into one of you? 264 00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:20,975 - No, if you were one of us, 265 00:10:21,016 --> 00:10:22,435 you would have come up with a better plan. 266 00:10:22,476 --> 00:10:24,520 Like, what are you gonna do when Spano calls your mom? 267 00:10:24,562 --> 00:10:27,398 - Why would she call my mom? - Uh, this is Bayside. 268 00:10:27,440 --> 00:10:29,900 The teachers are so afraid of the helicopter parents, 269 00:10:29,942 --> 00:10:31,861 they check in with them about everything. 270 00:10:31,902 --> 00:10:33,362 - You get a B-minus, they talk. 271 00:10:33,404 --> 00:10:35,990 You encase Toddman's car in a block of ice, they talk. 272 00:10:36,032 --> 00:10:37,408 The school is insane. - Mm-hmm. 273 00:10:37,450 --> 00:10:39,702 - Maybe there's nothing to worry about. 274 00:10:39,744 --> 00:10:40,953 She's not gonna call my mom. 275 00:10:40,995 --> 00:10:42,371 - Yeah, you're probably right. 276 00:10:42,413 --> 00:10:45,541 I mean, you know the school better than we do. 277 00:10:45,583 --> 00:10:48,044 Three, two, one. 278 00:10:48,085 --> 00:10:49,920 - Oh, God. Dr. Spano left a voice mail 279 00:10:49,962 --> 00:10:52,298 saying she left my mom a voice mail. 280 00:10:52,339 --> 00:10:53,632 What do I do? 281 00:10:53,674 --> 00:10:55,718 - Well, you could ask us to help you with a scheme, 282 00:10:55,760 --> 00:10:57,386 but just know one day, 283 00:10:57,428 --> 00:11:01,098 we will ask something of you in return, so choose wisely. 284 00:11:01,766 --> 00:11:04,226 - Okay, will you help me with a scheme? 285 00:11:04,268 --> 00:11:06,771 - Yes, can I have the rest of your fries? 286 00:11:06,812 --> 00:11:08,147 That is the thing we ask in return. 287 00:11:08,189 --> 00:11:09,899 - Why can you never wait to cash in on a favor? 288 00:11:09,940 --> 00:11:11,233 - I have no impulse control. 289 00:11:15,654 --> 00:11:17,239 - Okay, so what's the plan? - What do you think? 290 00:11:17,281 --> 00:11:18,574 We could try Swedish Backpack. 291 00:11:18,616 --> 00:11:20,659 - No, the school doesn't have a boiler room. 292 00:11:20,701 --> 00:11:21,911 How about a Three Finger Sally? 293 00:11:21,952 --> 00:11:23,162 - Not close enough to a body of water. 294 00:11:23,204 --> 00:11:24,580 - Plus, my passport's expired. 295 00:11:24,622 --> 00:11:26,165 - What the hell are you talking about? 296 00:11:26,207 --> 00:11:27,291 - These are classic schemes, Daisy. 297 00:11:27,333 --> 00:11:29,335 - Yeah. If we explain our shorthand, 298 00:11:29,377 --> 00:11:31,462 then it defeats the purpose of a shorthand, 299 00:11:31,504 --> 00:11:34,673 or shor-la-bop-bop, which is shorthand for shorthand. 300 00:11:34,715 --> 00:11:38,177 - Okay, we just need to hurry. My mom's shift ends at 4:00, 301 00:11:38,219 --> 00:11:40,346 so she'll probably call Dr. Spano back then. 302 00:11:40,388 --> 00:11:41,847 - Well, if we're not shor-la-bop-bop on time, 303 00:11:41,889 --> 00:11:43,724 there's only one way to go. 304 00:11:43,766 --> 00:11:45,059 both: The Giraffe's Gambit. 305 00:11:45,101 --> 00:11:47,019 - We'll need an actress to play your mom. 306 00:11:47,061 --> 00:11:48,562 - But I don't know any actresses. 307 00:11:48,604 --> 00:11:52,400 Ooh, my aunt was on the news after a raccoon stole her bra. 308 00:11:52,441 --> 00:11:54,860 - Okay. 309 00:11:54,902 --> 00:11:56,278 - Oh. Mm-hmm. 310 00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:57,822 - No, too short. - Mm. 311 00:11:57,863 --> 00:11:59,156 - No, way too tall. 312 00:11:59,198 --> 00:12:01,283 - Oh, I love her, but not for this. 313 00:12:01,325 --> 00:12:03,119 - Mm-hmm. Would you ever consider her 314 00:12:03,160 --> 00:12:05,746 being a Russian 24-year-old with big falsies? 315 00:12:05,788 --> 00:12:08,124 - My mom? No! 316 00:12:08,165 --> 00:12:10,584 - Okay, well, if you're gonna be so picky, 317 00:12:10,626 --> 00:12:13,879 then which one of these women looks the most like your mom? 318 00:12:13,921 --> 00:12:16,173 - [sighs] The only Latina one. 319 00:12:16,215 --> 00:12:18,134 - Well, creatively, 320 00:12:18,175 --> 00:12:23,055 it just feels like a safe choice, but it's fine. 321 00:12:24,932 --> 00:12:27,727 [indistinct chatter] 322 00:12:27,768 --> 00:12:29,228 - Oh, no! 323 00:12:29,270 --> 00:12:31,063 It looks like Pacific Coast High 324 00:12:31,105 --> 00:12:32,898 trashed our locker room 325 00:12:32,940 --> 00:12:34,525 right before our game against them. 326 00:12:34,567 --> 00:12:37,695 - Wow, it sure was definitely those guys. 327 00:12:37,737 --> 00:12:39,280 - Yeah. - See? 328 00:12:39,321 --> 00:12:41,073 They even left these printouts 329 00:12:41,115 --> 00:12:42,950 of their school website, which proves it. 330 00:12:42,992 --> 00:12:44,660 - What the hell is this? 331 00:12:44,702 --> 00:12:48,330 "Jamie's constantly eating baby food pouches." 332 00:12:48,372 --> 00:12:49,457 Yeah, so? 333 00:12:49,498 --> 00:12:51,375 It's just to give my teeth a vacation. 334 00:12:51,417 --> 00:12:53,419 - How do they know about my parents' divorce? 335 00:12:53,461 --> 00:12:56,797 I only told Coach Slater about that. 336 00:12:56,839 --> 00:12:59,425 - Well, see if the graffiti says anything else. 337 00:12:59,467 --> 00:13:02,178 - "I heard this from not Coach Slater." 338 00:13:02,219 --> 00:13:03,471 Oh, okay, good. 339 00:13:03,512 --> 00:13:06,432 - Look, I don't wanna say anything, 340 00:13:06,474 --> 00:13:09,101 but I overheard their offensive line 341 00:13:09,143 --> 00:13:11,437 talking about how you guys don't even know 342 00:13:11,479 --> 00:13:13,939 the freeway dance from "La La Land." 343 00:13:13,981 --> 00:13:15,441 - What? - But we do! 344 00:13:15,483 --> 00:13:19,111 We've been practicing it all year instead of football. 345 00:13:19,153 --> 00:13:20,363 - You know what? Everybody huddle up. 346 00:13:20,404 --> 00:13:21,947 Right now, let's go. Get in here. 347 00:13:21,989 --> 00:13:25,368 So they've shown us who they are. 348 00:13:25,409 --> 00:13:26,911 - Mean boys. - Right. 349 00:13:26,952 --> 00:13:28,829 Now we're gonna show them who we are. 350 00:13:28,871 --> 00:13:30,081 all: Nice men. - No! 351 00:13:30,122 --> 00:13:31,916 We're mean boys also, 352 00:13:31,957 --> 00:13:33,834 so you know what we're going to do? 353 00:13:33,876 --> 00:13:35,294 Not gonna say hi to them. 354 00:13:35,336 --> 00:13:37,630 Yeah, we're not gonna tell them, "Nice tackle" 355 00:13:37,671 --> 00:13:40,633 when they tackle us-- if they tackle us. 356 00:13:40,674 --> 00:13:44,637 Those jerks have left us no choice but to go out there 357 00:13:44,678 --> 00:13:47,515 and beat them in football points. 358 00:13:47,556 --> 00:13:48,974 all: Yeah! 359 00:13:49,016 --> 00:13:52,520 Mean boys, mean boys, mean boys! 360 00:13:52,561 --> 00:13:53,771 - Hey, Mr. T. 361 00:13:53,813 --> 00:13:56,941 I felt kind of bad about what happened earlier, 362 00:13:56,982 --> 00:13:58,943 so I wanted you to have my shirt. 363 00:13:58,984 --> 00:14:02,488 - Wow, thank you very much, DeVante. 364 00:14:02,530 --> 00:14:05,157 Is it also because now that I've been seen 365 00:14:05,199 --> 00:14:08,828 wearing this shirt, it's no longer cool? 366 00:14:08,869 --> 00:14:11,455 - Yes. 367 00:14:11,497 --> 00:14:13,374 [bell rings] 368 00:14:14,709 --> 00:14:16,627 - Are you Dr. Spano? I'm Daisy's mom. 369 00:14:16,669 --> 00:14:19,422 - Oh, it's so lovely to meet you. 370 00:14:19,463 --> 00:14:20,840 - Thank you for showing an interest in my daughter, 371 00:14:20,881 --> 00:14:22,508 Daisy Sofia Jiménez, 372 00:14:22,550 --> 00:14:25,094 who was born in the Los Angeles County Hospital 373 00:14:25,136 --> 00:14:27,388 on July 12th, 2005. 374 00:14:27,430 --> 00:14:31,350 - Of course. Should we step into my office? 375 00:14:31,392 --> 00:14:33,394 - It's actually a custom among my people 376 00:14:33,436 --> 00:14:36,355 that we go for a walk outside when we first meet a person. 377 00:14:36,397 --> 00:14:39,025 - And I feel uncomfortable questioning you on that, 378 00:14:39,066 --> 00:14:41,318 so let's do it. 379 00:14:42,445 --> 00:14:44,071 [suspenseful music] 380 00:14:44,113 --> 00:14:46,532 - Okay, now that Spano's busy with your fake mom, 381 00:14:46,574 --> 00:14:48,242 all that you have to do is hide in her office 382 00:14:48,284 --> 00:14:50,202 and then intercept the call from your real mom. 383 00:14:50,244 --> 00:14:53,122 - Wait, I forgot. Am I pretending to be my mom? 384 00:14:53,164 --> 00:14:55,708 - No, because then your mom would be talking to your mom. 385 00:14:57,168 --> 00:14:59,545 Sorry, I should have slapped you earlier. 386 00:15:02,006 --> 00:15:05,634 - My name is Jessie Spano. 387 00:15:05,676 --> 00:15:08,054 I'd like to buy a Volvo. 388 00:15:08,095 --> 00:15:10,473 [phone rings] 389 00:15:12,266 --> 00:15:14,810 Dr. Spano's office. I am her. 390 00:15:14,852 --> 00:15:17,563 - Hi, this is Anna Jiménez returning your call. 391 00:15:17,605 --> 00:15:19,482 - Why, hello, Ms. Jiménez. 392 00:15:19,523 --> 00:15:21,442 I am Daisy's guidance counselor. 393 00:15:21,484 --> 00:15:24,904 As you can tell by my voice, I am white. 394 00:15:24,945 --> 00:15:26,489 - Congratulations. 395 00:15:26,530 --> 00:15:28,199 So what was it you wanted to talk to me about? 396 00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:29,658 - Ah, yes. 397 00:15:29,700 --> 00:15:31,786 The thing I wanted to talk to you about. 398 00:15:31,827 --> 00:15:34,872 That thing is... 399 00:15:34,914 --> 00:15:37,875 [light tense music] 400 00:15:37,917 --> 00:15:41,212 Um, that thing is... 401 00:15:41,253 --> 00:15:45,257 that your daughter is excelling at Bayside. 402 00:15:45,299 --> 00:15:48,219 - Oh, that's--wow. Okay. 403 00:15:48,260 --> 00:15:49,929 * * 404 00:15:49,970 --> 00:15:52,765 Um, so that's it? 405 00:15:52,807 --> 00:15:53,933 - Yep. Guess I didn't need 406 00:15:53,974 --> 00:15:54,975 to call you. Bye. 407 00:15:55,017 --> 00:15:57,269 * * 408 00:15:57,311 --> 00:15:59,355 - It was so great meeting you, Ms. Jiménez. 409 00:15:59,397 --> 00:16:01,899 And I know I keep saying this, 410 00:16:01,941 --> 00:16:04,777 but you really look like that lady from the gum commercial. 411 00:16:04,819 --> 00:16:07,488 - Me, with these pearly whites? [laughs] 412 00:16:16,038 --> 00:16:23,254 * * 413 00:16:24,046 --> 00:16:28,426 all: Bayside, Bayside, Bayside, Bayside, Bayside! 414 00:16:28,467 --> 00:16:30,803 - Yo, I cannot believe we actually pulled that off. 415 00:16:30,845 --> 00:16:33,305 - Pulled what off? We lost again. 416 00:16:33,347 --> 00:16:35,307 - Yeah, but only by seven. 417 00:16:35,349 --> 00:16:36,892 That's, like, a normal football amount. 418 00:16:36,934 --> 00:16:39,145 - We kept it close until the very end, 419 00:16:39,186 --> 00:16:40,980 even though it was past our bedtimes. 420 00:16:41,022 --> 00:16:43,441 - And I soiled my pants with dirt this time. 421 00:16:43,482 --> 00:16:44,650 - That's what I'm talking about. 422 00:16:44,692 --> 00:16:46,318 That's what-- I'm proud of you guys. 423 00:16:46,360 --> 00:16:49,447 [indistinct chatter] 424 00:16:51,532 --> 00:16:54,243 - I owe you a thank you. 425 00:16:54,285 --> 00:16:56,495 - For what? We didn't get the W. 426 00:16:56,537 --> 00:16:58,581 - [sighs] Maybe not. 427 00:16:58,622 --> 00:17:00,207 But we got something more important. 428 00:17:00,249 --> 00:17:03,169 We got the N for knowledge. 429 00:17:03,210 --> 00:17:05,087 You know, you're right. 430 00:17:05,129 --> 00:17:06,505 It does feel good to get fired up 431 00:17:06,547 --> 00:17:09,508 and actually try to win. 432 00:17:09,550 --> 00:17:11,719 - Well, that's something, I guess. 433 00:17:13,012 --> 00:17:14,847 - Come get pizza with us. 434 00:17:19,226 --> 00:17:21,020 - I can't. 435 00:17:21,062 --> 00:17:23,189 Pizza is for winners. 436 00:17:23,230 --> 00:17:26,317 - Oh, okay. 437 00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:28,027 They also have sandwiches. 438 00:17:28,069 --> 00:17:31,030 [melancholy music] 439 00:17:31,072 --> 00:17:33,574 * * 440 00:17:33,616 --> 00:17:35,951 - Now, since I'll be trading in my existing Volvo 441 00:17:35,993 --> 00:17:38,913 for a new Volvo, do I qualify for discounts 442 00:17:38,954 --> 00:17:42,875 available to Volvo VIP Beige Diamond Volvo Club members? 443 00:17:42,917 --> 00:17:44,585 - Funny you should ask. I saw your inquiry 444 00:17:44,627 --> 00:17:46,712 on stock number 4123, and I was-- 445 00:17:46,754 --> 00:17:49,382 [record scratch] - Hi, I live here now. 446 00:17:49,423 --> 00:17:51,425 [laptop rings] 447 00:17:51,467 --> 00:17:53,469 - I'll have to call you back. - Okay. 448 00:17:55,679 --> 00:17:57,390 - Hey, honey. How is the retreat? 449 00:17:57,431 --> 00:17:58,891 - So rewarding. 450 00:17:58,933 --> 00:18:00,684 We are learning this new form of meditation 451 00:18:00,726 --> 00:18:03,854 that involves lying prone on a mat, eyes closed, 452 00:18:03,896 --> 00:18:07,149 inducing a state of temporary unconsciousness. 453 00:18:07,191 --> 00:18:10,194 - So, like, a nap? - [laughs] 454 00:18:10,236 --> 00:18:12,113 Oh, Jessie. 455 00:18:12,154 --> 00:18:13,781 - How is your writing going? You almost finished? 456 00:18:13,823 --> 00:18:15,032 - Almost. 457 00:18:15,074 --> 00:18:18,744 Shaman Jeremy says, "Writing is unwriting," 458 00:18:18,786 --> 00:18:21,372 so I'm sort of rethinking my novel. 459 00:18:21,414 --> 00:18:22,748 Anyway, they said I could stay on 460 00:18:22,790 --> 00:18:24,333 an extra couple months so I can finish. 461 00:18:24,375 --> 00:18:27,628 - Wait, a couple months? - Well, yeah. 462 00:18:27,670 --> 00:18:30,715 - No, it's just--I was kind of expecting you home soon. 463 00:18:30,756 --> 00:18:32,425 You know, you could hang out with Jamie 464 00:18:32,466 --> 00:18:34,260 and take care of your own bees. 465 00:18:34,301 --> 00:18:39,098 - So you're saying that you want me to come back? 466 00:18:39,140 --> 00:18:40,599 - No, no, no. 467 00:18:40,641 --> 00:18:42,810 I mean, if it's important to you, then... 468 00:18:42,852 --> 00:18:45,146 - [sighs] Thank you. Jessie Spano. 469 00:18:45,187 --> 00:18:46,897 You are the only reason 470 00:18:46,939 --> 00:18:50,985 that I am able to love myself as much as I do. 471 00:18:52,028 --> 00:18:55,281 - I love you too? 472 00:18:55,322 --> 00:18:57,658 [laptop beeps] 473 00:18:59,618 --> 00:19:01,620 [door creaks, shuts] 474 00:19:01,662 --> 00:19:04,206 [light tense music] 475 00:19:04,248 --> 00:19:06,459 - [sighs, gasps] 476 00:19:06,500 --> 00:19:09,336 * * 477 00:19:13,883 --> 00:19:16,177 - What were you doing under my desk? 478 00:19:16,218 --> 00:19:19,555 - I never talked to my mom. I forged the permission slip, 479 00:19:19,597 --> 00:19:21,515 so when you called her, Mack and Lexi said-- 480 00:19:21,557 --> 00:19:25,186 - Oh, wait. It's a Giraffe's Gambit. 481 00:19:25,227 --> 00:19:27,897 - Wait, how do you know about the Giraffe's Gambit? 482 00:19:27,938 --> 00:19:30,191 - I did my fair share of schemes back in the day. 483 00:19:30,232 --> 00:19:32,276 Who do you think was the original giraffe? 484 00:19:32,318 --> 00:19:34,820 - Oh, because you're tall. 485 00:19:34,862 --> 00:19:36,864 - And I eat a lot of salads. 486 00:19:36,906 --> 00:19:39,533 So why didn't you just talk to your mom? 487 00:19:39,575 --> 00:19:42,328 - I tried. It was too hard. 488 00:19:42,370 --> 00:19:44,205 - You can do hard things. 489 00:19:44,246 --> 00:19:47,041 Women need to be able to advocate for what they want, 490 00:19:47,083 --> 00:19:49,877 even if it means telling their loved ones 491 00:19:49,919 --> 00:19:56,550 that they should come home from stupid retreats. 492 00:19:56,592 --> 00:19:58,803 [sighs] I am such a hypocrite. 493 00:19:58,844 --> 00:20:02,014 - No, marriage is complicated, 494 00:20:02,056 --> 00:20:04,141 and also, I didn't hear anything. 495 00:20:04,183 --> 00:20:07,561 - You're right, marriage is complicated. 496 00:20:07,603 --> 00:20:10,856 And sometimes it requires hard conversations, 497 00:20:10,898 --> 00:20:16,070 and I think I need to have one, and I think you do, too. 498 00:20:16,112 --> 00:20:19,073 [gentle music] 499 00:20:19,115 --> 00:20:26,038 * * 500 00:20:27,957 --> 00:20:30,292 - Hey, getting ready for the next game? 501 00:20:30,334 --> 00:20:33,087 - How did you know I was here? - Security called. 502 00:20:33,129 --> 00:20:35,715 Said someone was yelling in Spanish on the football field, 503 00:20:35,756 --> 00:20:38,008 and for once, I knew it wasn't me. 504 00:20:38,050 --> 00:20:39,635 - I'm just so mad. 505 00:20:39,677 --> 00:20:41,220 Everybody's at The Max right now 506 00:20:41,262 --> 00:20:42,763 celebrating yet another loss. 507 00:20:42,805 --> 00:20:46,392 - Or maybe they're celebrating improvement. 508 00:20:46,434 --> 00:20:49,186 - Don't tell me you're getting soft on me too, Coach. 509 00:20:49,228 --> 00:20:51,272 What would your dad say if he was still alive? 510 00:20:51,313 --> 00:20:54,275 - I never said my dad was dead. 511 00:20:54,316 --> 00:20:59,363 - I'm sorry, I just assumed, you know, since you're so old. 512 00:20:59,405 --> 00:21:00,656 - Come on, I'm not that old. 513 00:21:00,698 --> 00:21:02,283 I still rock Michael Jordan kicks. 514 00:21:02,324 --> 00:21:06,120 Look, maybe you just need to cut yourself some slack. 515 00:21:06,162 --> 00:21:08,581 You accomplished more with this team in the last few days 516 00:21:08,622 --> 00:21:10,750 than I have in the last 15 years. 517 00:21:10,791 --> 00:21:14,628 For what it's worth, I'm proud of you, 518 00:21:14,670 --> 00:21:17,006 and you deserve pizza. 519 00:21:17,048 --> 00:21:18,674 - Thanks, Coach. 520 00:21:18,716 --> 00:21:20,342 [pleasant music] 521 00:21:20,384 --> 00:21:23,596 - Check it out. Huh? 522 00:21:23,637 --> 00:21:25,097 - Oh. 523 00:21:25,139 --> 00:21:26,807 I thought you meant that I should go get pizza 524 00:21:26,849 --> 00:21:28,893 with, like, Jamie and the guys, 525 00:21:28,934 --> 00:21:30,311 but I can-- - No, no, no, no. 526 00:21:30,352 --> 00:21:32,188 That's totally what I meant. Go be with the team. 527 00:21:32,229 --> 00:21:33,981 - Yeah. - This was just a visual aid 528 00:21:34,023 --> 00:21:36,317 for reference, you know, like an example 529 00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:38,069 of what pizza is. - Yeah. 530 00:21:38,110 --> 00:21:41,113 - That's all. - Yeah--cool. 531 00:21:41,155 --> 00:21:43,574 - Hey, Mom. You need any help? 532 00:21:43,616 --> 00:21:47,161 - I thought you hated folding laundry. 533 00:21:47,203 --> 00:21:50,456 - No, I hate doing laundry. That laundry room's haunted. 534 00:21:50,498 --> 00:21:52,792 There's always a flapper woman sitting on the dryer 535 00:21:52,833 --> 00:21:54,502 asking when Prohibition's gonna end. 536 00:21:54,543 --> 00:21:55,920 - [chuckles] 537 00:21:58,381 --> 00:22:01,092 - I do have one thing I wanted to talk to you about, though. 538 00:22:01,133 --> 00:22:03,761 My guidance counselor wants me to apply 539 00:22:03,803 --> 00:22:05,763 for this really prestigious leadership program, 540 00:22:05,805 --> 00:22:07,556 all expenses paid. 541 00:22:07,598 --> 00:22:09,809 - Daisy, that's great. 542 00:22:09,850 --> 00:22:14,355 - But it's in New York, and it's all summer long. 543 00:22:14,397 --> 00:22:16,607 - Oh. 544 00:22:16,649 --> 00:22:18,442 Huh. 545 00:22:18,484 --> 00:22:23,656 Well, I guess I have to figure some things out. 546 00:22:23,698 --> 00:22:25,700 - I know it's asking a lot, 547 00:22:25,741 --> 00:22:29,036 but it's really important to me. 548 00:22:29,078 --> 00:22:30,621 - Then it's important to me too. 549 00:22:30,663 --> 00:22:32,289 - Really? 550 00:22:32,331 --> 00:22:35,042 - Yeah, of course. 551 00:22:35,084 --> 00:22:36,377 - But you already do so much, 552 00:22:36,419 --> 00:22:38,212 and now you have to pay someone to watch Hector. 553 00:22:38,254 --> 00:22:39,422 - Forget about Hector. 554 00:22:39,463 --> 00:22:41,173 You think he's gonna buy me a house one day? 555 00:22:41,215 --> 00:22:43,551 - Hell no. I'm gonna live off the land. 556 00:22:43,592 --> 00:22:45,219 - [laughs softly] 557 00:22:45,261 --> 00:22:47,221 - Why do you think I work this hard? 558 00:22:47,263 --> 00:22:48,973 It's because I love you, 559 00:22:49,014 --> 00:22:52,184 and I want you to have all the opportunities I didn't. 560 00:22:52,226 --> 00:22:53,602 - Yeah, stupid. 561 00:22:53,644 --> 00:22:56,063 - [chuckles] 562 00:22:56,105 --> 00:23:00,026 - Well, René, at least now you know how I feel, 563 00:23:00,067 --> 00:23:02,028 and if you wanna be in a real partnership, 564 00:23:02,069 --> 00:23:05,114 you should think long and hard about what you do next. 565 00:23:07,825 --> 00:23:09,410 - Hey, did you hear? 566 00:23:09,452 --> 00:23:12,496 We beat Pacific Coast High by negative seven. 567 00:23:12,538 --> 00:23:14,915 - What? - Never mind. 568 00:23:14,957 --> 00:23:16,751 You want some pizza? It's not that cold. 569 00:23:16,792 --> 00:23:19,754 - You know what? That would be great. 570 00:23:19,795 --> 00:23:21,255 - Nice. Look. 571 00:23:21,297 --> 00:23:23,883 Huh? 572 00:23:26,302 --> 00:23:28,429 You all right? 573 00:23:28,471 --> 00:23:30,681 - Not really. 574 00:23:30,723 --> 00:23:32,683 - Do you wanna talk about it, or... 575 00:23:32,725 --> 00:23:37,563 - Not really, but this is helping. 576 00:23:37,605 --> 00:23:39,648 * * 577 00:23:39,690 --> 00:23:41,400 - Hey, guys. What are you doing here? 578 00:23:41,442 --> 00:23:42,985 It's Friday night. Come on. 579 00:23:43,027 --> 00:23:44,862 Let's go clubbing or something. 580 00:23:44,904 --> 00:23:47,865 Look, I'm rocking my new shirt. 581 00:23:47,907 --> 00:23:50,284 - [yelling] - Whoa! 582 00:23:52,411 --> 00:23:55,373 - So you guys wanna call the Lyft, or should I? 583 00:23:55,414 --> 00:23:58,334 [upbeat music] 584 00:23:58,376 --> 00:24:05,341 * *