1
00:00:12,408 --> 00:00:15,202
- Hey, Ron, you need any help?
2
00:00:15,244 --> 00:00:17,204
- Oh, I don't think so.
3
00:00:17,246 --> 00:00:18,497
I already bought the ice cream,
4
00:00:18,539 --> 00:00:20,082
and I certainly
don't need help eating it.
5
00:00:20,124 --> 00:00:21,417
[both chuckling]
6
00:00:21,459 --> 00:00:23,794
- I was, uh--
I was talking about all this.
7
00:00:23,836 --> 00:00:25,254
- Oh, that.
8
00:00:25,296 --> 00:00:27,882
Judy needed more space
for Rick's Bowflex,
9
00:00:27,923 --> 00:00:29,383
so we agreed to kick me out.
10
00:00:29,425 --> 00:00:30,593
It's for the best.
11
00:00:30,634 --> 00:00:32,344
I mean,
you can't beat the commute.
12
00:00:32,386 --> 00:00:35,639
[chuckling]
- Wait. You're living here?
13
00:00:35,681 --> 00:00:37,266
- What? No.
14
00:00:37,308 --> 00:00:39,560
That'd be against the law.
15
00:00:39,602 --> 00:00:42,104
And you would tell, right?
16
00:00:42,146 --> 00:00:44,398
- Let's pre-game at my place
before the ice cream social.
17
00:00:44,440 --> 00:00:45,816
Aisha, are you in?
18
00:00:45,858 --> 00:00:48,527
- Hell, yeah!
Wouldn't miss it, girl!
19
00:00:48,569 --> 00:00:50,613
- Oh, Yasmin,
we should go to bio.
20
00:00:50,654 --> 00:00:53,240
We're dissecting frogs,
and I'm gonna faint.
21
00:00:53,282 --> 00:00:54,450
[bell rings]
22
00:00:54,492 --> 00:00:56,535
- Bye! See you at the pre-game!
23
00:00:56,577 --> 00:00:57,953
- [imitating Aisha] Hell, yeah.
Wouldn't miss it girl.
24
00:00:57,995 --> 00:00:59,538
[giggles]
25
00:00:59,580 --> 00:01:02,083
- So what if I'm excited
to go to the ice cream social?
26
00:01:02,124 --> 00:01:03,501
If you think it's lame,
don't go.
27
00:01:03,542 --> 00:01:05,628
- I have to go
'cause of student council.
28
00:01:05,669 --> 00:01:07,963
You think I want to spend
my Friday night at school
29
00:01:08,005 --> 00:01:09,423
scooping ice cream?
30
00:01:09,465 --> 00:01:12,009
No, I want to try the new
decaffeinated tea I just got
31
00:01:12,051 --> 00:01:13,469
and fall asleep reading.
32
00:01:13,511 --> 00:01:15,638
- You are so judgmental
about Bayside.
33
00:01:15,679 --> 00:01:17,181
- [scoffs]
No, I'm not!
34
00:01:17,223 --> 00:01:20,309
There's plenty of Bayside stuff
I'm not judgmental about.
35
00:01:20,351 --> 00:01:23,437
- Like what?
36
00:01:23,479 --> 00:01:25,106
- These floors are clean.
37
00:01:25,147 --> 00:01:27,233
- Mm.
38
00:01:27,274 --> 00:01:29,151
- I guess the person of color
they underpaid to clean them
39
00:01:29,193 --> 00:01:30,736
did a great job.
- See?
40
00:01:30,778 --> 00:01:34,156
Yo, if you could make it one
week without hating on Bayside,
41
00:01:34,198 --> 00:01:36,367
I'll give you 50 bucks.
42
00:01:36,409 --> 00:01:37,910
Ooh, I've been hanging out
with too many rich kids.
43
00:01:37,952 --> 00:01:38,994
I'll give you 50 cents.
44
00:01:39,036 --> 00:01:40,121
- Deal.
- Deal.
45
00:01:40,162 --> 00:01:41,414
- Hey, ladies,
46
00:01:41,455 --> 00:01:43,499
I just met the hottest girl.
47
00:01:43,541 --> 00:01:46,502
Her name's Pamela,
and she's a perfect ten.
48
00:01:46,544 --> 00:01:49,004
I mean, blonde hair,
gorgeous smile,
49
00:01:49,046 --> 00:01:50,673
and she just had
really bad mono,
50
00:01:50,715 --> 00:01:52,675
so you know she does tongues.
- Mm.
51
00:01:52,717 --> 00:01:54,009
Wow, what do you think
about that, Daisy?
52
00:01:54,051 --> 00:01:56,929
- Yeah.
53
00:01:56,971 --> 00:01:57,930
- I think it's cool.
54
00:01:57,972 --> 00:01:59,390
Congratulations
on your new love.
55
00:01:59,432 --> 00:02:01,517
- Guys, I just met
the girl of my dreams.
56
00:02:01,559 --> 00:02:04,520
Blonde hair, killer smile,
recently sick.
57
00:02:04,562 --> 00:02:06,313
[record scratches]
- It's the same girl.
58
00:02:06,355 --> 00:02:07,857
- Wait, yo, J-Dog.
59
00:02:07,898 --> 00:02:09,525
You also met a hot blonde
this morning?
60
00:02:09,567 --> 00:02:12,695
- That's right.
- Do you think--
61
00:02:12,737 --> 00:02:14,905
both: We should both ask
our separate girls
62
00:02:14,947 --> 00:02:16,866
to the ice cream social
Friday night?
63
00:02:16,907 --> 00:02:19,452
- Yeah!
- Yes!
64
00:02:19,493 --> 00:02:21,245
[bell rings]
65
00:02:21,287 --> 00:02:22,872
* When I wake up
in the mornin' *
66
00:02:22,913 --> 00:02:24,623
* Alarm gives out a warnin' *
67
00:02:24,665 --> 00:02:27,043
* I don't think I'll ever
make it on time *
68
00:02:27,084 --> 00:02:28,711
* By the time
I grab my books *
69
00:02:28,753 --> 00:02:30,087
* And I give myself a look *
70
00:02:30,129 --> 00:02:33,591
* I'm at the corner,
just in time *
71
00:02:33,632 --> 00:02:36,093
* It's all right,
it's all right *
72
00:02:36,135 --> 00:02:37,386
* Saved by the bell *
73
00:02:37,428 --> 00:02:39,388
* It's all right,
it's all right *
74
00:02:39,430 --> 00:02:40,973
* Saved by the bell *
75
00:02:41,015 --> 00:02:43,434
* It's all right *
76
00:02:43,476 --> 00:02:47,480
* 'Cause I'm saved
by the bell *
77
00:02:47,521 --> 00:02:49,523
[bell rings]
78
00:02:49,565 --> 00:02:52,943
[indistinct chatter]
79
00:02:55,279 --> 00:02:57,656
- Hey, buddy!
Free seat over here.
80
00:02:58,657 --> 00:03:00,242
Let's do our secret handshake.
81
00:03:00,284 --> 00:03:01,994
- We don't have a secret--
- * Whatever you do is right *
82
00:03:02,036 --> 00:03:03,329
* Whenever you stop,
it's done *
83
00:03:03,371 --> 00:03:04,663
That was horrible.
84
00:03:04,705 --> 00:03:06,957
- [clears throat]
Hello.
85
00:03:08,084 --> 00:03:10,711
Oh, my God!
Okay. Don't look now.
86
00:03:10,753 --> 00:03:13,464
My dream girl just walked in.
87
00:03:13,506 --> 00:03:15,466
[light music]
88
00:03:15,508 --> 00:03:17,259
- Whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait.
89
00:03:17,301 --> 00:03:19,553
My dream girl just walked in.
90
00:03:19,595 --> 00:03:20,930
- Yours?
- Uh-huh.
91
00:03:20,971 --> 00:03:22,431
- You know what this means?
[record scratches]
92
00:03:22,473 --> 00:03:23,766
- Thank God.
93
00:03:23,808 --> 00:03:26,143
both: Our future girlfriends
are best friends?
94
00:03:26,185 --> 00:03:28,270
- Dude! Come on!
95
00:03:28,312 --> 00:03:29,313
[record scratches]
96
00:03:29,355 --> 00:03:30,606
I honestly think
97
00:03:30,648 --> 00:03:33,943
she's going to be
the mother of my children.
98
00:03:33,984 --> 00:03:37,113
- Um, well...
99
00:03:37,154 --> 00:03:38,447
I guess maybe,
100
00:03:38,489 --> 00:03:39,782
but you can always adopt,
J-Dog.
101
00:03:39,824 --> 00:03:42,243
- Oh, I mean,
well, yeah, of course.
102
00:03:42,284 --> 00:03:43,536
- Yeah, man.
- Okay, kids.
103
00:03:43,577 --> 00:03:44,995
Settle down, please.
104
00:03:45,037 --> 00:03:46,872
- I know last-minute assemblies
are never good news,
105
00:03:46,914 --> 00:03:49,709
but this one is not
as bad as the last one.
106
00:03:49,750 --> 00:03:51,794
No one's parents
were lost at sea.
107
00:03:51,836 --> 00:03:54,380
- Have my parents been found?
108
00:03:54,422 --> 00:03:56,465
- Uh, no.
Listen, last night,
109
00:03:56,507 --> 00:03:58,342
the school's brand-new iPads
110
00:03:58,384 --> 00:04:01,470
were stolen
out of my room--office.
111
00:04:01,512 --> 00:04:02,972
And until they are returned,
112
00:04:03,013 --> 00:04:04,932
the ice cream social
is canceled.
113
00:04:04,974 --> 00:04:07,435
- Dude!
[students clamoring]
114
00:04:07,476 --> 00:04:09,145
- Hey! Hey!
115
00:04:09,186 --> 00:04:10,479
Sorry, guys.
116
00:04:10,521 --> 00:04:12,648
My house, my rules.
117
00:04:12,690 --> 00:04:15,192
And again,
it's not my house,
118
00:04:15,234 --> 00:04:17,653
because I don't live here.
119
00:04:17,695 --> 00:04:19,864
- We are launching a thorough
120
00:04:19,905 --> 00:04:22,491
and, more importantly,
ethical investigation.
121
00:04:22,533 --> 00:04:23,868
- That's right, Jessie.
122
00:04:23,909 --> 00:04:27,329
We're calling it the
"Snitches Get Riches" Program.
123
00:04:27,371 --> 00:04:31,542
- Um, I thought we said no more
disciplinary experiments
124
00:04:31,584 --> 00:04:33,836
without running them
by me first.
125
00:04:33,878 --> 00:04:36,338
- The "Snitches Get Riches"
Program
126
00:04:36,380 --> 00:04:38,340
is a tattle raffle,
127
00:04:38,382 --> 00:04:41,761
and great idea
that we all agree on.
128
00:04:41,802 --> 00:04:44,472
Now, if anybody thinks they
know who stole those iPads,
129
00:04:44,513 --> 00:04:46,265
just write their name down,
put it in here,
130
00:04:46,307 --> 00:04:48,017
and you just might win
131
00:04:48,059 --> 00:04:50,394
a Vizio LED smart TV
132
00:04:50,436 --> 00:04:52,938
with two years
of Geek Squad Protection.
133
00:04:52,980 --> 00:04:54,398
Are there any questions?
134
00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:56,233
Well,
I don't see any hands,
135
00:04:56,275 --> 00:04:58,194
so assembly dismissed.
136
00:04:58,235 --> 00:05:01,572
* *
137
00:05:01,614 --> 00:05:04,700
- Okay, somebody
throw it at him.
138
00:05:04,742 --> 00:05:06,327
- But he said don't.
139
00:05:06,369 --> 00:05:07,620
- [sighs]
140
00:05:11,374 --> 00:05:13,876
Really?
- It's, like, so messed up
141
00:05:13,918 --> 00:05:15,544
they canceled
the ice cream social.
142
00:05:15,586 --> 00:05:16,921
- Mm, yeah.
- [sighs] I just wish
143
00:05:16,962 --> 00:05:19,131
if someone knew who did it,
they'd come forward.
144
00:05:19,173 --> 00:05:20,925
You know, if, like, it was,
like, their cousin
145
00:05:20,966 --> 00:05:22,468
or their friend
from the bus
146
00:05:22,510 --> 00:05:25,221
or an opponent
from a rival dance crew.
147
00:05:25,262 --> 00:05:30,726
* *
148
00:05:30,768 --> 00:05:33,062
- Wait, do you think
I know who did it?
149
00:05:33,104 --> 00:05:35,731
[scoffing and laughing]
- Oh, my God. No, Aisha, no!
150
00:05:35,773 --> 00:05:38,067
I would never say that
out loud.
151
00:05:38,109 --> 00:05:40,319
- Okay. Just--just--
just throw it at him!
152
00:05:40,361 --> 00:05:42,405
Just go ahead and throw it!
153
00:05:42,446 --> 00:05:43,781
- Don't.
154
00:05:47,326 --> 00:05:52,331
* *
155
00:05:52,373 --> 00:05:53,582
- Do people keep asking you
156
00:05:53,624 --> 00:05:55,000
if you know
who stole all the iPads?
157
00:05:55,042 --> 00:05:56,168
- Yeah!
158
00:05:56,210 --> 00:05:58,087
They obviously think
a Douglas kid did it
159
00:05:58,129 --> 00:05:59,338
and we're covering it up.
160
00:05:59,380 --> 00:06:00,506
- How dare they all assume
161
00:06:00,548 --> 00:06:02,883
that we know
who stole the iPads.
162
00:06:02,925 --> 00:06:04,301
- I mean, it was DeVante,
right?
163
00:06:04,343 --> 00:06:06,095
We know he stole them.
- Oh, yeah. He's 100% guilty.
164
00:06:06,137 --> 00:06:08,180
- Like, we would
never tell on him, but--
165
00:06:08,222 --> 00:06:09,765
- Obviously!
[sighs]
166
00:06:09,807 --> 00:06:12,268
But he literally did
the same thing back at Douglas.
167
00:06:12,309 --> 00:06:13,519
Granted, those weren't iPads.
168
00:06:13,561 --> 00:06:15,229
They were RadioShack
Infotainment Squares.
169
00:06:15,271 --> 00:06:16,772
- Mm.
170
00:06:16,814 --> 00:06:18,566
But the Bayside kids don't
know that we know all that.
171
00:06:18,607 --> 00:06:20,484
[scoffs]
It's so unfair.
172
00:06:20,526 --> 00:06:21,944
Like, DeVante makes us
all look bad.
173
00:06:21,986 --> 00:06:23,612
Now I know
how pro basketball players
174
00:06:23,654 --> 00:06:24,947
who don't cheat
on their wives feel.
175
00:06:24,989 --> 00:06:26,741
- We've had this conversation
a million times.
176
00:06:26,782 --> 00:06:28,576
They all cheat.
177
00:06:28,617 --> 00:06:30,161
- Not Sue Bird.
- Don't say "not Sue Bird."
178
00:06:30,202 --> 00:06:31,412
- All right.
179
00:06:31,454 --> 00:06:34,457
She loves Megan.
That's all I'm saying.
180
00:06:34,498 --> 00:06:38,753
* *
181
00:06:38,794 --> 00:06:40,254
- You know what's weird?
182
00:06:40,296 --> 00:06:41,297
How we both met a girl
183
00:06:41,338 --> 00:06:43,674
and fell in love
on the same day.
184
00:06:43,716 --> 00:06:45,384
- Statistically,
it was bound to happen.
185
00:06:45,426 --> 00:06:46,635
- True.
186
00:06:46,677 --> 00:06:48,012
- I can't take it anymore.
187
00:06:48,054 --> 00:06:50,973
- Mm, I'd keep my judgmental
opinions to myself.
188
00:06:51,015 --> 00:06:53,809
Unless you hate having 50 cents
in your pocket.
189
00:06:53,851 --> 00:06:56,312
- I don't know what poor-o bet
you two are making,
190
00:06:56,353 --> 00:06:57,521
but Aisha's right.
191
00:06:57,563 --> 00:06:58,814
Bayside mating rituals
192
00:06:58,856 --> 00:07:01,150
are always more complicated
than they seem.
193
00:07:01,192 --> 00:07:03,652
Best to stay out of it
and let it run its course.
194
00:07:03,694 --> 00:07:05,279
- It's too bad
about the ice cream social.
195
00:07:05,321 --> 00:07:07,656
That was gonna be the perfect
date for me and Pamela.
196
00:07:07,698 --> 00:07:08,824
- Wait,
your girl's name is Pamela?
197
00:07:08,866 --> 00:07:10,284
That's my girl's name, too.
198
00:07:10,326 --> 00:07:11,994
- Wait, but that means--
199
00:07:13,454 --> 00:07:15,748
both: We only have to write
one Valentine's Day rap.
200
00:07:15,790 --> 00:07:17,291
- Yeah!
- Yes.
201
00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:21,253
[coins rattle on table]
- It's the same Pamela, idiots!
202
00:07:21,295 --> 00:07:22,546
- [scoffs]
Nuh-uh.
203
00:07:22,588 --> 00:07:25,091
- No, no, no,
My girl is like this.
204
00:07:25,132 --> 00:07:28,177
- Exactly. And my Pamela
is like this.
205
00:07:28,219 --> 00:07:29,762
- Uh-huh.
206
00:07:32,556 --> 00:07:34,475
both:
[gasp] No!
207
00:07:34,517 --> 00:07:36,977
- Hey, guys! Oh, since
the ice cream social is off,
208
00:07:37,019 --> 00:07:38,646
I'm having a party
on Friday night
209
00:07:38,688 --> 00:07:40,523
at my stepmom's stepmom's
Malibu beach house.
210
00:07:40,564 --> 00:07:42,233
So check your email
for invites.
211
00:07:42,274 --> 00:07:44,276
- I'm taking Pamela
to that party.
212
00:07:44,318 --> 00:07:46,237
- No. I'm taking Pamela
to that party.
213
00:07:46,278 --> 00:07:48,489
- Hey, look, there's a
perfectly reasonable way
214
00:07:48,531 --> 00:07:49,949
to settle this.
215
00:07:49,990 --> 00:07:53,869
A winner-take-all gentlemen's
prank war for her heart.
216
00:07:53,911 --> 00:07:57,623
- No.
- Hey, Jamie, are you okay?
217
00:07:57,665 --> 00:07:58,999
Or did some dumb bitch
ruin everything
218
00:07:59,041 --> 00:08:00,751
by opening
her dumb-bitch mouth?
219
00:08:00,793 --> 00:08:03,462
- Mac is so much better
at this stuff than me.
220
00:08:03,504 --> 00:08:04,922
You know,
one time he tricked me
221
00:08:04,964 --> 00:08:07,216
into falling in love with him
so he could steal my car.
222
00:08:07,258 --> 00:08:08,634
- Ah.
- [sighs]
223
00:08:08,676 --> 00:08:11,595
Damn, he looked good
driving that droptop.
224
00:08:11,637 --> 00:08:13,305
See? I still feel it.
225
00:08:13,347 --> 00:08:16,267
Hey, Pamela would be crazy
not to pick you.
226
00:08:16,308 --> 00:08:18,185
You're so hot and popular.
227
00:08:18,227 --> 00:08:19,228
You're like Justin Bieber
228
00:08:19,270 --> 00:08:21,605
if he wasn't, like,
100 years old.
229
00:08:21,647 --> 00:08:23,733
- Oh. Thank you, Lexi.
- Mm-hmm.
230
00:08:23,774 --> 00:08:27,278
[chuckling]
231
00:08:27,319 --> 00:08:29,321
Daisy,
when somebody who gets paid
232
00:08:29,363 --> 00:08:32,450
to sell Casper mattresses
on Instagram gives you advice,
233
00:08:32,491 --> 00:08:33,617
you listen.
234
00:08:33,659 --> 00:08:36,037
You should have stayed
out of this.
235
00:08:36,078 --> 00:08:39,040
- Hey, did you guys get
Yasmin's invite?
236
00:08:39,081 --> 00:08:40,583
- Mm, yeah. It's right here.
237
00:08:40,624 --> 00:08:42,251
- Oh.
[chuckles]
238
00:08:42,293 --> 00:08:45,087
Maybe mine went to spam.
239
00:08:45,129 --> 00:08:49,300
Is her email address
pumpit@penismasters.biz?
240
00:08:49,341 --> 00:08:53,429
- Ugh, how do I say this
in a nice way?
241
00:08:53,471 --> 00:08:56,432
She didn't invite you.
242
00:08:56,474 --> 00:08:59,894
But your shirt is good.
243
00:08:59,935 --> 00:09:01,604
- Let me guess.
244
00:09:01,645 --> 00:09:04,482
None of the Douglas kids
were invited.
245
00:09:04,523 --> 00:09:09,695
* *
246
00:09:09,737 --> 00:09:11,072
- Hey.
247
00:09:11,113 --> 00:09:13,407
I know what you did.
- No, thanks.
248
00:09:13,449 --> 00:09:14,784
- I know you stole those iPads,
249
00:09:14,825 --> 00:09:16,118
'cause you did the same thing
back at Douglas.
250
00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:18,120
- Those weren't iPads.
Those were garbage.
251
00:09:18,162 --> 00:09:19,330
They only had one app on them
252
00:09:19,372 --> 00:09:21,415
called "American Facebook,
not from Russia."
253
00:09:21,457 --> 00:09:22,583
They were very hard to sell.
254
00:09:22,625 --> 00:09:23,751
- Can you just do
the right thing for once
255
00:09:23,793 --> 00:09:24,919
and give them back?
256
00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:25,836
- Can you just
mind your business?
257
00:09:25,878 --> 00:09:27,213
- This is my business.
258
00:09:27,254 --> 00:09:29,423
You're making
all the Douglas kids look bad.
259
00:09:29,465 --> 00:09:32,093
I'm the freakin' quarterback
of the football team.
260
00:09:32,134 --> 00:09:33,260
I shouldn't be excluded
from parties
261
00:09:33,302 --> 00:09:34,887
'cause your ass don't--
- There it is.
262
00:09:34,929 --> 00:09:36,847
So this ain't about
doing the right thing,
263
00:09:36,889 --> 00:09:38,140
because if it was,
264
00:09:38,182 --> 00:09:39,934
you would've brought
this up back at Douglas.
265
00:09:39,975 --> 00:09:41,644
But you didn't.
266
00:09:41,685 --> 00:09:43,479
So I wonder
why you're bringing it up
267
00:09:43,521 --> 00:09:44,647
now that we go to Hogwarts.
268
00:09:44,689 --> 00:09:46,232
- No, that's not why,
269
00:09:46,273 --> 00:09:47,817
and don't try
to make it about that.
270
00:09:47,858 --> 00:09:49,110
- Yeah, see,
you only care about this
271
00:09:49,151 --> 00:09:50,277
'cause you don't want
to look bad
272
00:09:50,319 --> 00:09:51,821
in front of your
little white friends.
273
00:09:51,862 --> 00:09:53,322
- [scoffs]
274
00:09:53,364 --> 00:09:54,615
First of all, uh,
275
00:09:54,657 --> 00:09:57,118
Yasmin's dad is half-Persian.
276
00:09:57,159 --> 00:10:00,371
Look, you stole those iPads,
and that's wrong.
277
00:10:00,413 --> 00:10:01,956
- Yep.
278
00:10:01,997 --> 00:10:04,333
And I'm not giving them back.
279
00:10:04,375 --> 00:10:06,502
Now what?
280
00:10:06,544 --> 00:10:13,426
* *
281
00:10:21,726 --> 00:10:23,394
- Now this.
282
00:10:25,896 --> 00:10:27,231
This makes sense
if you just heard
283
00:10:27,273 --> 00:10:30,401
the end of my previous
conversation, okay?
284
00:10:35,906 --> 00:10:38,451
[bell rings]
285
00:10:38,492 --> 00:10:41,203
- Oh, hey, Jamie. Isn't,
uh, Pamela in this class?
286
00:10:41,245 --> 00:10:43,956
The object of our
gentlemen's prank war?
287
00:10:43,998 --> 00:10:46,459
- Is she? Hmm.
I hadn't realized.
288
00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:49,420
[door opens]
289
00:10:52,048 --> 00:10:54,675
[clears throat]
Hey, dude, um, no offense,
290
00:10:54,717 --> 00:10:57,845
but you smell
like hella dog poop.
291
00:10:59,388 --> 00:11:01,640
- Yeah, I should hope so.
292
00:11:01,682 --> 00:11:03,267
[whimpering]
293
00:11:03,309 --> 00:11:05,978
Oh, I've been volunteering
at an animal rescue.
294
00:11:06,020 --> 00:11:09,315
Hey, girl.
This is for you.
295
00:11:09,357 --> 00:11:10,733
- What?
296
00:11:10,775 --> 00:11:13,527
- So she's just going to
hold a dog all through class?
297
00:11:13,569 --> 00:11:15,404
[door opens]
298
00:11:15,446 --> 00:11:16,864
[bell rings]
299
00:11:16,906 --> 00:11:18,324
- [sighs]
300
00:11:18,366 --> 00:11:21,452
Okay, students,
dogs, take your seats.
301
00:11:21,494 --> 00:11:24,413
You have the whole class
to finish your quiz,
302
00:11:24,455 --> 00:11:25,623
because I need to finish
303
00:11:25,664 --> 00:11:27,541
writing an angry letter
to Tinder
304
00:11:27,583 --> 00:11:31,128
about the quality of the
responses I've been getting.
305
00:11:32,505 --> 00:11:37,009
- I have a delivery for
a "future Mrs. Pamela Spano."
306
00:11:37,051 --> 00:11:38,677
- Pretty romantic, huh?
307
00:11:38,719 --> 00:11:39,970
Wait till you hear the poem.
308
00:11:40,012 --> 00:11:42,139
- I've been instructed
to read this poem.
309
00:11:42,181 --> 00:11:44,725
- Um, can you not?
We're in the middle of a quiz.
310
00:11:44,767 --> 00:11:46,769
- [clears throat]
311
00:11:46,811 --> 00:11:49,397
"Roses are red,
violets are blue
312
00:11:49,438 --> 00:11:51,816
Jamie is married,
but Mac says--"
313
00:11:51,857 --> 00:11:54,485
- Hey, boo.
314
00:11:54,527 --> 00:11:56,362
- Damn it! How?
315
00:11:59,990 --> 00:12:03,619
- [whispering]
Psst! Daisy!
316
00:12:03,661 --> 00:12:05,454
Daisy!
317
00:12:05,496 --> 00:12:07,373
Switch seats with me
so I can sit next to Pamela.
318
00:12:07,415 --> 00:12:08,749
- No! Shh!
319
00:12:08,791 --> 00:12:11,377
- She's in the middle
of a quiz. Leave her alone!
320
00:12:11,419 --> 00:12:14,338
Daisy! Daisy!
321
00:12:14,380 --> 00:12:17,133
Switch seats with me
so I can sit next to Pamela!
322
00:12:17,174 --> 00:12:19,218
Please!
- Ugh! Fine, Jamie! Take it!
323
00:12:19,260 --> 00:12:22,346
Whatever will get you two
to shut up!
324
00:12:22,388 --> 00:12:24,306
- Hey.
325
00:12:24,348 --> 00:12:25,808
- Aw...
326
00:12:25,850 --> 00:12:27,768
I guess you won.
327
00:12:27,810 --> 00:12:28,894
Wait.
328
00:12:28,936 --> 00:12:30,354
[desk whirring]
329
00:12:30,396 --> 00:12:31,480
- Whoa!
330
00:12:31,522 --> 00:12:32,898
Dude, come on!
331
00:12:32,940 --> 00:12:34,984
Not fair!
- Mac, stop it!
332
00:12:35,026 --> 00:12:36,360
- Shh, shh.
- Daisy, be quiet.
333
00:12:36,402 --> 00:12:37,945
The other students are trying
to take their quiz.
334
00:12:37,987 --> 00:12:39,321
- [stammering]
335
00:12:41,407 --> 00:12:43,534
[Jamie groans]
336
00:12:43,576 --> 00:12:46,162
- Hey, beautiful.
Can I buy you a drink?
337
00:12:46,203 --> 00:12:48,497
- What's happening?
Is she doing it?
338
00:12:48,539 --> 00:12:51,751
Is he buying her a drink?
[desk whirring]
339
00:12:51,792 --> 00:12:54,378
- Hey, um, people are saying
340
00:12:54,420 --> 00:12:57,381
they saw you put a name
in the snitch box.
341
00:12:57,423 --> 00:12:58,466
- Maybe.
342
00:12:58,507 --> 00:13:01,510
Not that it's
any of your business.
343
00:13:01,552 --> 00:13:03,054
- So you're really going
to get me in trouble
344
00:13:03,095 --> 00:13:05,306
just 'cause you didn't get
invited to some dumb-ass party?
345
00:13:05,347 --> 00:13:07,558
- You did the wrong thing
and stole.
346
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:09,435
So I did the right thing,
and I told on you.
347
00:13:09,477 --> 00:13:11,729
- Hmm. Mm. Okay.
348
00:13:11,771 --> 00:13:13,731
So 30 iPads.
349
00:13:13,773 --> 00:13:15,691
So that's a felony, right?
350
00:13:15,733 --> 00:13:18,027
Damn, I'm probably going to be
in jail for a couple years.
351
00:13:18,069 --> 00:13:19,987
Not ideal.
Not ideal at all.
352
00:13:20,029 --> 00:13:22,656
You know, 'cause both
of my parents are gone
353
00:13:22,698 --> 00:13:24,867
and I take care of my grandma.
354
00:13:24,909 --> 00:13:27,161
Oh, but you love
doing the right thing.
355
00:13:27,203 --> 00:13:28,371
So you'll step in.
356
00:13:28,412 --> 00:13:30,206
Yeah, you'll give her
her insulin shots
357
00:13:30,247 --> 00:13:32,375
and fill out
her Medicare paperwork.
358
00:13:32,416 --> 00:13:34,210
Pick up her teeth
when she throws them at the TV
359
00:13:34,251 --> 00:13:37,296
'cause someone tried
to lie to Judge Judy.
360
00:13:37,338 --> 00:13:39,090
You'll do
all those things, right?
361
00:13:39,131 --> 00:13:40,633
Cool. Thanks.
362
00:13:40,674 --> 00:13:45,179
* *
363
00:13:45,221 --> 00:13:48,307
- Bro, what you just did
in there was messed up.
364
00:13:48,349 --> 00:13:51,394
You know I love her, right?
- No, I love her!
365
00:13:51,435 --> 00:13:53,562
All I want to do is stare
at her blue or brown eyes!
366
00:13:53,604 --> 00:13:54,939
Eye?
367
00:13:54,980 --> 00:13:56,982
Eyes!
- Oh, my God!
368
00:13:57,024 --> 00:13:58,317
Neither of you love her!
369
00:13:58,359 --> 00:14:00,194
You haven't even
heard her speak!
370
00:14:00,236 --> 00:14:02,905
Can she?
You don't know.
371
00:14:02,947 --> 00:14:04,365
I'm ending this, now.
372
00:14:04,407 --> 00:14:07,118
- No, Daisy!
What are you doing?
373
00:14:09,829 --> 00:14:11,580
- Mac and Jamie both like you.
374
00:14:11,622 --> 00:14:14,667
Do you want to go to Yasmin's
party with either of them?
375
00:14:16,419 --> 00:14:18,087
- Great! Done.
- [chuckles]
376
00:14:18,129 --> 00:14:20,131
- This whole stupid thing
is over. Hurray!
377
00:14:20,172 --> 00:14:22,550
- Ha! I won!
378
00:14:22,591 --> 00:14:23,801
I won Pamela's heart!
379
00:14:23,843 --> 00:14:26,512
- [scoffs] I can't believe
you just did that!
380
00:14:26,554 --> 00:14:28,431
No one
in the history of Bayside
381
00:14:28,472 --> 00:14:31,934
has ever short-circuited
a gentlemen's prank war before.
382
00:14:31,976 --> 00:14:35,312
[scoffing]
383
00:14:35,354 --> 00:14:37,898
- Oh, sorry, I don't need
a romantic serenade anymore.
384
00:14:38,774 --> 00:14:43,070
Actually, can you play
"Bitch Better Have My Money"?
385
00:14:43,112 --> 00:14:46,574
[violin plays]
386
00:14:46,615 --> 00:14:48,868
- So you really snitched
on DeVante?
387
00:14:48,909 --> 00:14:51,537
- No. Do not try
to guilt-trip me.
388
00:14:51,579 --> 00:14:53,998
That sob story about his family
was probably made up.
389
00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:58,794
I bet his real grandma is,
like, rich and hella strong.
390
00:14:58,836 --> 00:15:02,923
- Do you think you're maybe
being kind of hard on him?
391
00:15:02,965 --> 00:15:04,216
He's still one of us.
392
00:15:04,258 --> 00:15:06,177
- [scoffs]
Why do people keep saying that?
393
00:15:06,218 --> 00:15:08,929
I'm not like him.
394
00:15:08,971 --> 00:15:10,347
- Do you remember
in middle school
395
00:15:10,389 --> 00:15:12,308
when you got your braids done
for class pictures
396
00:15:12,349 --> 00:15:13,893
and you wanted
to add pink hair?
397
00:15:13,934 --> 00:15:16,228
You didn't 'cause you thought
it looked too ghetto,
398
00:15:16,270 --> 00:15:17,688
but then our teacher,
Ms. Winston--
399
00:15:17,730 --> 00:15:18,981
- Freakin' Ms. Winston.
400
00:15:19,023 --> 00:15:21,025
[speaking Spanish]
401
00:15:21,067 --> 00:15:22,360
- Uh, right.
402
00:15:22,401 --> 00:15:24,862
She called your regular
403
00:15:24,904 --> 00:15:27,323
not-pink braids "ghetto"
anyway.
404
00:15:27,365 --> 00:15:30,785
Sometimes people are just...
Ms. Winstons.
405
00:15:30,826 --> 00:15:32,703
Some of the Bayside kids
are going to paint
406
00:15:32,745 --> 00:15:34,622
all the Douglas kids
with the same brush,
407
00:15:34,663 --> 00:15:36,165
no matter what we do.
408
00:15:36,207 --> 00:15:38,000
DeVante did a bad thing.
409
00:15:38,042 --> 00:15:39,251
But you're blaming him
410
00:15:39,293 --> 00:15:41,545
for how those other kids
are making you feel.
411
00:15:41,587 --> 00:15:44,340
* *
412
00:15:44,382 --> 00:15:47,718
- [crying]
Stop it, Lexi.
413
00:15:47,760 --> 00:15:49,929
[door opens]
Crying in a bathroom stall
414
00:15:49,970 --> 00:15:51,347
is so basic.
415
00:15:51,389 --> 00:15:53,057
[door closes]
[continues crying]
416
00:15:53,099 --> 00:15:55,017
- Lexi?
417
00:15:55,059 --> 00:15:56,435
Is that you?
418
00:15:56,477 --> 00:15:57,353
- You.
419
00:15:57,395 --> 00:15:58,854
You ruined everything
420
00:15:58,896 --> 00:16:01,649
in your JC Penney "stern frump"
collection sweater.
421
00:16:01,691 --> 00:16:03,359
- It's Kelly Clarkson
for Kohl's.
422
00:16:03,401 --> 00:16:04,777
- Did it ever occur to you
423
00:16:04,819 --> 00:16:06,779
that maybe I have complicated
feelings for Jamie
424
00:16:06,821 --> 00:16:09,407
and that all of Mac
and Jamie's little schemes
425
00:16:09,448 --> 00:16:11,867
to win Pamela's heart
existed within a larger scheme
426
00:16:11,909 --> 00:16:13,160
for me to win Jamie's?
427
00:16:13,202 --> 00:16:14,787
- How could that possibly
have occurred to me?
428
00:16:14,829 --> 00:16:17,873
- Okay. Let me
break it down for you.
429
00:16:17,915 --> 00:16:19,333
I like Jamie.
430
00:16:19,375 --> 00:16:21,377
And for the past 11 months,
I've been looking for
431
00:16:21,419 --> 00:16:23,170
the perfect opportunity
to tell him.
432
00:16:23,212 --> 00:16:25,214
And if you had just
minded your own business
433
00:16:25,256 --> 00:16:26,465
and let it run its course,
434
00:16:26,507 --> 00:16:28,217
Mac would have
won Pamela's heart,
435
00:16:28,259 --> 00:16:29,510
Jamie would have been
devastated,
436
00:16:29,552 --> 00:16:31,387
and I could've swooped in
and revealed my feelings
437
00:16:31,429 --> 00:16:32,805
at the romantic
ice cream social
438
00:16:32,847 --> 00:16:34,515
when Jamie was
at his most vulnerable.
439
00:16:34,557 --> 00:16:36,475
- I'm sorry,
I really want to hear this,
440
00:16:36,517 --> 00:16:38,561
but I do have to pee.
- Hold it.
441
00:16:38,602 --> 00:16:40,104
- Please...
- When you interfered
442
00:16:40,146 --> 00:16:41,605
and made Pamela choose
prematurely,
443
00:16:41,647 --> 00:16:43,524
it completely screwed up
my Lexi-con.
444
00:16:43,566 --> 00:16:46,736
"Lexi-cons" are what
I call my schemes.
445
00:16:46,777 --> 00:16:49,780
- Well, wouldn't it be easier
if you just ask him out?
446
00:16:49,822 --> 00:16:51,574
- You're so judgmental.
447
00:16:51,615 --> 00:16:53,701
[scoffs]
448
00:16:53,743 --> 00:17:00,666
* *
449
00:17:02,793 --> 00:17:04,795
- I think Eric
stole the iPads.
450
00:17:04,837 --> 00:17:06,797
Maybe you should give us
both detention
451
00:17:06,839 --> 00:17:08,674
and lock us
in the room together,
452
00:17:08,716 --> 00:17:11,177
and as punishment,
we have to kiss 100 times.
453
00:17:11,218 --> 00:17:13,637
- I'm not sure who to tell,
454
00:17:13,679 --> 00:17:16,474
but I think Toddman
lives at the school now.
455
00:17:16,515 --> 00:17:19,101
I saw him walking around
in a bathrobe
456
00:17:19,143 --> 00:17:20,895
holding a shower caddie.
457
00:17:20,936 --> 00:17:23,564
- Aisha?
What are you doing?
458
00:17:23,606 --> 00:17:25,649
Are you busting
into the snitch box?
459
00:17:25,691 --> 00:17:29,028
- Wait, why would you do
something like that, unless...
460
00:17:29,070 --> 00:17:30,946
[both groan]
461
00:17:30,988 --> 00:17:32,490
You stole the iPads.
462
00:17:39,246 --> 00:17:42,958
* *
463
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,920
[indistinct whispering]
464
00:17:45,961 --> 00:17:49,215
- [whispering] She stole them.
- [whispering] That's her.
465
00:17:49,256 --> 00:17:51,759
- Stop whispering.
I can hear you.
466
00:17:51,801 --> 00:17:54,804
- Sorry, we have to whisper.
We're in the library.
467
00:17:54,845 --> 00:17:56,931
We think you're a thief.
468
00:17:56,972 --> 00:17:57,973
Sorry.
469
00:17:58,015 --> 00:17:59,392
- [sighs]
470
00:17:59,433 --> 00:18:01,477
This sucks.
Everyone thinks I did it.
471
00:18:01,519 --> 00:18:02,645
Like, any minute now,
472
00:18:02,686 --> 00:18:04,105
Toddman's going to call me
into his office,
473
00:18:04,146 --> 00:18:05,815
and everyone's
going to go, "Ooh!"
474
00:18:05,856 --> 00:18:07,650
And I'll be branded
the Bayside thief.
475
00:18:07,692 --> 00:18:10,319
- So what are you going to do?
- It doesn't matter.
476
00:18:10,361 --> 00:18:12,321
Now I know that no matter
how much I try
477
00:18:12,363 --> 00:18:14,615
to distance myself
from DeVante,
478
00:18:14,657 --> 00:18:16,909
these kids are always going
to think of us as the same.
479
00:18:16,951 --> 00:18:19,870
You were right. This school
is full of Ms. Winstons.
480
00:18:19,912 --> 00:18:21,997
Freakin' "Precious Moments"
collectin'-ass,
481
00:18:22,039 --> 00:18:23,749
Joann Fabrics lovin'-ass bitch.
482
00:18:23,791 --> 00:18:25,334
- Okay.
- [over PA]Aisha Garcia,
483
00:18:25,376 --> 00:18:26,961
to my office, please.
484
00:18:27,002 --> 00:18:28,754
- [scoffs]
Come on.
485
00:18:28,796 --> 00:18:30,339
[students oohing]
486
00:18:30,381 --> 00:18:32,508
Yeah, that's right. "Ooh!"
487
00:18:32,550 --> 00:18:35,219
I stole the iPads.
You got me.
488
00:18:37,722 --> 00:18:41,016
Nobody want's your lame-ass
JanSport, Mason!
489
00:18:41,058 --> 00:18:43,185
Yasmin literally
has a Fendi bag.
490
00:18:43,227 --> 00:18:44,937
I would obviously steal that.
491
00:18:44,979 --> 00:18:47,189
* *
492
00:18:47,231 --> 00:18:48,899
- We don't think you took
the iPads, Aisha,
493
00:18:48,941 --> 00:18:50,693
but we think
you might know who did.
494
00:18:50,735 --> 00:18:54,030
- Yeah, well, even if I did,
I wouldn't tell you.
495
00:18:54,071 --> 00:18:56,699
- Oh, that's a big problem.
496
00:18:56,741 --> 00:18:58,826
- I'm sorry, but I'm not going
to give the people here
497
00:18:58,868 --> 00:19:00,619
another reason to look at us
all like we're criminals.
498
00:19:00,661 --> 00:19:02,747
- No, the problem
I'm referring to
499
00:19:02,788 --> 00:19:05,499
is that I just found
the box of iPads
500
00:19:05,541 --> 00:19:08,252
right under my desk.
501
00:19:08,294 --> 00:19:11,380
They were shoved
behind this box of photos
502
00:19:11,422 --> 00:19:14,633
of me and Judy on vacation.
503
00:19:14,675 --> 00:19:17,678
- Wait,
so no one took the iPads?
504
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:19,430
- Niagara Falls.
505
00:19:19,472 --> 00:19:22,641
God, she filled out
that rain poncho.
506
00:19:22,683 --> 00:19:25,061
Anyway,
all's well that ends well.
507
00:19:25,102 --> 00:19:27,646
What do you say we just keep
this between ourselves?
508
00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:29,357
- Ron!
- All right, I'll do it!
509
00:19:29,398 --> 00:19:30,566
I'll make an announcement.
510
00:19:30,608 --> 00:19:33,069
[P.A. clicks on]
Hey, everybody!
511
00:19:33,110 --> 00:19:36,405
So, uh...
512
00:19:36,447 --> 00:19:38,741
[dance music playing]
513
00:19:38,783 --> 00:19:45,581
* *
514
00:19:45,623 --> 00:19:48,459
[indistinct chatter]
515
00:19:53,506 --> 00:19:55,257
- Where's
your girlfriend, loser?
516
00:19:55,299 --> 00:19:56,592
- Where's your girlfriend?
517
00:19:56,634 --> 00:19:58,886
Oh, wait, that's right.
She doesn't exist.
518
00:19:58,928 --> 00:20:01,305
Just like Santa...
I found out recently.
519
00:20:01,347 --> 00:20:02,681
- Hey, first off,
Santa is real, bro.
520
00:20:02,723 --> 00:20:04,266
He exists in the hearts
of all who believe.
521
00:20:04,308 --> 00:20:06,936
- Yeah.
- And second off, this...
522
00:20:06,977 --> 00:20:08,229
- [gasps]
523
00:20:08,270 --> 00:20:10,940
- [scoffs] Jokes on you.
My penis was hot anyways.
524
00:20:10,981 --> 00:20:11,982
- Oh.
525
00:20:13,651 --> 00:20:16,445
[students clamoring]
526
00:20:21,951 --> 00:20:23,703
- Hey! Hey!
527
00:20:25,329 --> 00:20:28,999
Hey, knock it off!
My office, now!
528
00:20:30,501 --> 00:20:33,003
Okay, I've seen this before.
529
00:20:33,045 --> 00:20:37,466
This whole competition
isn't over a girl at all.
530
00:20:37,508 --> 00:20:39,719
You're both just trying
to one-up each other
531
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:41,554
and prove you're
the big man on campus.
532
00:20:41,595 --> 00:20:44,056
They call it...
533
00:20:44,098 --> 00:20:45,558
toxic masculinity.
534
00:20:45,599 --> 00:20:47,643
Forget about this stupid fight.
535
00:20:47,685 --> 00:20:50,521
Your friendship--
that's what really matters.
536
00:20:50,563 --> 00:20:51,856
- What friendship?
- Too far!
537
00:20:51,897 --> 00:20:54,191
- Hey! Hey!
Come on, guys.
538
00:20:54,233 --> 00:20:55,526
Look, when I was
in high school,
539
00:20:55,568 --> 00:20:57,820
I constantly used to fight
with my best friend
540
00:20:57,862 --> 00:20:58,863
over a hot girl.
541
00:20:58,904 --> 00:21:00,322
[chuckles]
542
00:21:00,364 --> 00:21:02,324
Oh, it was actually your dad.
543
00:21:02,366 --> 00:21:03,993
Over your mom!
544
00:21:04,035 --> 00:21:05,369
Anyway, look.
545
00:21:05,411 --> 00:21:07,496
Then I just found another girl
that I really liked,
546
00:21:07,538 --> 00:21:10,291
and I started hooking up
with her instead.
547
00:21:10,332 --> 00:21:12,126
Wait, that was your mom.
548
00:21:12,168 --> 00:21:15,171
Anyway, look,
what I'm trying to say here is,
549
00:21:15,212 --> 00:21:17,173
girls, they come and go.
550
00:21:17,214 --> 00:21:20,468
The only thing that really
matters here is friendship.
551
00:21:20,509 --> 00:21:22,011
Now, that is forever.
552
00:21:22,053 --> 00:21:24,221
- But you don't even talk
to my dad anymore.
553
00:21:24,263 --> 00:21:26,766
And I know that 'cause my mom
was sending out Christmas cards
554
00:21:26,807 --> 00:21:28,726
and she goes,
"Should I send one to Slater?"
555
00:21:28,768 --> 00:21:32,021
And he goes, "Nah,
I don't talk to him anymore."
556
00:21:32,063 --> 00:21:34,065
- It would have been nice
to get one of those.
557
00:21:34,106 --> 00:21:35,858
Got a cool collection
of fridge magnets.
558
00:21:35,900 --> 00:21:37,193
Nothing to hang.
559
00:21:37,234 --> 00:21:39,862
- And you keep saying
that none of this matters,
560
00:21:39,904 --> 00:21:42,698
but according to your story,
it totally mattered.
561
00:21:42,740 --> 00:21:45,743
Like, Mac's dad winning
that battle was probably
562
00:21:45,785 --> 00:21:47,703
one of the most important
things he ever did.
563
00:21:47,745 --> 00:21:49,663
- Yeah, if he didn't win,
I wouldn't exist.
564
00:21:49,705 --> 00:21:52,208
- Oh, my God. That's true.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
565
00:21:52,249 --> 00:21:54,502
So the girl we fight over now
566
00:21:54,543 --> 00:21:56,712
could end up
being our future wife?
567
00:21:56,754 --> 00:21:59,590
When I think about it
like that, I mean...
568
00:21:59,632 --> 00:22:02,927
I just know that Pamela
is not the one for me.
569
00:22:02,968 --> 00:22:04,762
- Me either.
- Best friends again?
570
00:22:04,804 --> 00:22:07,223
- Yeah. Until there's another
girl we're both attracted to.
571
00:22:07,264 --> 00:22:09,225
- Great!
- Sweet!
572
00:22:09,266 --> 00:22:11,185
Thanks, Coach.
573
00:22:11,227 --> 00:22:12,478
- Yeah.
[sniffles]
574
00:22:12,520 --> 00:22:14,271
[clears throat]
Really glad we had this talk.
575
00:22:14,313 --> 00:22:15,606
- Yeah.
- I appreciate it.
576
00:22:15,648 --> 00:22:16,982
- Me too. Do you feel better?
- I feel great.
577
00:22:17,024 --> 00:22:18,901
- Me too. Good.
578
00:22:18,943 --> 00:22:21,028
- [gasps]
- In a moment of weakness,
579
00:22:21,070 --> 00:22:24,198
I confided in you
some very valuable information,
580
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:26,075
and I need to know what you're
planning on doing with it.
581
00:22:26,117 --> 00:22:27,993
- What? The Jamie thing?
582
00:22:28,035 --> 00:22:30,162
- Shh!
583
00:22:30,204 --> 00:22:32,623
What are you going to do,
you sick bitch?
584
00:22:32,665 --> 00:22:34,750
Extort me?
Sell it to Harvey Levin?
585
00:22:34,792 --> 00:22:37,128
He won't print it.
He's my godfather.
586
00:22:37,169 --> 00:22:40,548
- No! Lexi, I'm sorry
I messed up your plan.
587
00:22:40,589 --> 00:22:43,008
And I promise you,
I will never tell anyone.
588
00:22:43,050 --> 00:22:46,554
- Oh, my God.
I believe you.
589
00:22:46,595 --> 00:22:49,390
- So no one else knows
about this?
590
00:22:49,432 --> 00:22:51,684
- Absolutely not.
591
00:22:51,726 --> 00:22:54,687
Okay, having a crush
is pathetic and relatable.
592
00:22:54,729 --> 00:22:55,896
I don't want people knowing
593
00:22:55,938 --> 00:22:57,314
there's something I want
that I can't have.
594
00:22:57,356 --> 00:22:58,607
- Okay, and sorry.
595
00:22:58,649 --> 00:23:00,151
W-why do you think
you can't have it?
596
00:23:00,192 --> 00:23:01,485
- It's complicated.
597
00:23:01,527 --> 00:23:03,112
Look, Jamie and I
have been friends forever.
598
00:23:03,154 --> 00:23:04,697
We grew up next door
to each other.
599
00:23:04,739 --> 00:23:07,074
I guess it's so scary. I mean,
like, what if I tell him
600
00:23:07,116 --> 00:23:08,284
and things get weird
601
00:23:08,325 --> 00:23:09,869
and he doesn't want
to be my friend anymore?
602
00:23:09,910 --> 00:23:11,787
Then who am I going to wave
good night to every night?
603
00:23:11,829 --> 00:23:13,456
Our other neighbor
is Simon Cowell,
604
00:23:13,497 --> 00:23:16,876
and I promised myself
I would never return his wave.
605
00:23:16,917 --> 00:23:18,502
- Wow, I--
606
00:23:18,544 --> 00:23:21,130
I had no idea you had
all this going on.
607
00:23:21,172 --> 00:23:22,548
- Yeah.
608
00:23:22,590 --> 00:23:24,133
- I'm sorry
I've been so judgmental.
609
00:23:24,175 --> 00:23:27,928
- It's okay. I was judging
your T-zone this whole time.
610
00:23:27,970 --> 00:23:30,681
Touching it will
only make it worse.
611
00:23:30,723 --> 00:23:33,934
* *
612
00:23:33,976 --> 00:23:36,645
[dog barking, siren wailing]
613
00:23:36,687 --> 00:23:40,399
* *
614
00:23:40,441 --> 00:23:42,151
- DeVante!
615
00:23:42,193 --> 00:23:43,611
Yo!
616
00:23:43,652 --> 00:23:45,196
Hey, I'm sorry, but I--
- Yo, shh!
617
00:23:45,237 --> 00:23:47,156
I know I shouldn't be here and
I know that you're mad at me,
618
00:23:47,198 --> 00:23:49,950
but I'm Ms. Winston.
619
00:23:49,992 --> 00:23:52,703
I was afraid of what all the
Ms. Winstons thought about me,
620
00:23:52,745 --> 00:23:55,664
but I was Ms. Winston
the whole time.
621
00:23:55,706 --> 00:23:57,917
- No, thanks.
- Uh, you were right.
622
00:23:57,958 --> 00:24:00,878
I only told on you 'cause
I thought you made me look bad.
623
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:02,463
And I'm sorry for that.
624
00:24:02,505 --> 00:24:05,257
But I'm even more sorry
that it never occurred to me
625
00:24:05,299 --> 00:24:07,176
that you didn't do it.
626
00:24:07,218 --> 00:24:10,054
I had this idea in my head
about who you are.
627
00:24:10,096 --> 00:24:11,722
- Why?
628
00:24:11,764 --> 00:24:13,015
'Cause I stole that UPS truck
629
00:24:13,057 --> 00:24:14,475
and sold all
the packages in it?
630
00:24:14,517 --> 00:24:16,852
Or 'cause I jacked that Rascal
scooter outside of Target
631
00:24:16,894 --> 00:24:19,105
and took it
for a very slow joyride?
632
00:24:19,146 --> 00:24:21,941
- And because the other day,
you literally said, "I did it."
633
00:24:21,982 --> 00:24:24,068
[chuckles]
634
00:24:24,110 --> 00:24:26,028
Which I get now.
635
00:24:26,070 --> 00:24:29,865
- Look, I did some bad stuff
at Douglas.
636
00:24:29,907 --> 00:24:31,992
But you wanted a fresh start
at Bayside,
637
00:24:32,034 --> 00:24:35,621
and you never stopped to think
that maybe I wanted one, too.
638
00:24:35,663 --> 00:24:38,374
- I'm really sorry.
639
00:24:38,416 --> 00:24:40,835
Do you forgive me?
640
00:24:40,876 --> 00:24:43,379
- Only if you promise to
never come to my house again.
641
00:24:43,421 --> 00:24:45,047
[both chuckle]
642
00:24:45,089 --> 00:24:47,216
Come on, man.
Get out of here.
643
00:24:47,258 --> 00:24:49,552
- Oh, and, um, all that stuff
you said about your grandma
644
00:24:49,593 --> 00:24:52,054
and her medication and
you needing to help her, like--
645
00:24:52,096 --> 00:24:54,306
- Aw, yeah, I made all that up
just to make you feel bad.
646
00:24:54,348 --> 00:24:55,558
- Yeah, I thought so.
647
00:24:55,599 --> 00:24:57,601
Okay, well, I'ma just...
648
00:24:57,643 --> 00:25:00,021
- DeVante, I need my shot!
649
00:25:00,062 --> 00:25:02,064
And come pick up my teeth!
650
00:25:02,106 --> 00:25:04,316
Judge Judy caught
this man in a lie,
651
00:25:04,358 --> 00:25:06,736
talking about he don't know
who cut the tree down.
652
00:25:06,777 --> 00:25:08,779
He knows!
- [chuckles]
653
00:25:08,821 --> 00:25:11,240
You better go.
- Yeah, no. She's really scary.
654
00:25:11,282 --> 00:25:13,951
- [chuckles]