1 00:00:06,873 --> 00:00:08,041 (pleasant music playing) 2 00:00:08,141 --> 00:00:10,877 Captain Stede: Just out there, there was a whale, 3 00:00:10,977 --> 00:00:12,479 and it was being chased by a whole bunch of sharks... 4 00:00:12,545 --> 00:00:15,415 Izzy: We've been almost a fortnight aboard "The Revenge"... 5 00:00:15,515 --> 00:00:18,518 (laughing) 6 00:00:18,585 --> 00:00:20,387 and I'm startin' to suspect 7 00:00:20,487 --> 00:00:25,425 that Edward has no intention of ending Stede Bonnet's life. 8 00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:28,061 If I didn't know better... 9 00:00:28,161 --> 00:00:33,333 I'd say he's somehow become seduced by this... imbecile. 10 00:00:35,335 --> 00:00:36,736 (grunts) 11 00:00:36,836 --> 00:00:39,205 Ha-ha! Shall we call this a draw? 12 00:00:39,272 --> 00:00:42,008 (chuckles) Never! 13 00:00:42,075 --> 00:00:44,511 Ah! Ooh! Bugger! 14 00:00:46,012 --> 00:00:48,248 You are improving, though... Kinda. 15 00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:52,185 Yeah, well, it's been days since I've cut myself on my sword. 16 00:00:52,252 --> 00:00:54,254 Oop, no, there we go. Damn. 17 00:00:54,354 --> 00:00:55,755 You know what, Stede? 18 00:00:55,855 --> 00:00:57,424 If you wanted, I could teach you 19 00:00:57,524 --> 00:00:59,726 a more advanced trick of the trade. 20 00:01:00,260 --> 00:01:01,227 Oh yeah? 21 00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:03,229 (sword clatters) 22 00:01:06,099 --> 00:01:07,434 Stab me. 23 00:01:07,534 --> 00:01:09,803 (chuckles) Yeah, right. 24 00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:11,938 Oh, what's wrong? You scared? 25 00:01:12,038 --> 00:01:14,774 Take your sword, run me through. 26 00:01:14,874 --> 00:01:15,608 (scoffs) 27 00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:17,811 I don't think I wanna do that. 28 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:17,944 No worries then. 29 00:01:19,879 --> 00:01:21,247 I'll just have to shoot you. 30 00:01:21,314 --> 00:01:22,949 -Ed, don't shoot me! -Come on, mate! 31 00:01:23,049 --> 00:01:24,584 This is it. I'm gonna shoot you in the face! 32 00:01:24,651 --> 00:01:25,985 -No! -This is the life. 33 00:01:27,153 --> 00:01:29,089 Now, act... or die. 34 00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:29,889 -No! -One! 35 00:01:29,956 --> 00:01:31,391 -Two! Three! -Ahh! 36 00:01:31,458 --> 00:01:33,827 -Come at me, dog! -Ah! Ahh! 37 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,061 -(blade slices) -(winces) 38 00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:40,233 -(chuckles) -Ya happy now, you-- 39 00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:42,102 -Yeah. -I stabbed you, you nut! 40 00:01:42,168 --> 00:01:45,004 You managed to avoid all the important bits. 41 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:49,242 -What? -You see... gettin' run-through's an art. 42 00:01:49,309 --> 00:01:51,644 I've had it done to me dozens of times. 43 00:01:51,744 --> 00:01:54,314 The key... (grunts) 44 00:01:54,414 --> 00:01:56,316 is to take the blade where it does the least damage. 45 00:01:56,416 --> 00:01:59,652 -(Captain Stede groans) -Science tells us that all the useful organs 46 00:01:59,752 --> 00:02:00,954 are on the right part of the body, 47 00:02:01,020 --> 00:02:02,489 so I cleverly took the sword on the left. 48 00:02:02,589 --> 00:02:05,425 What-- Is that right? 49 00:02:05,492 --> 00:02:09,195 -I mean, the, the liver. -The liver? (chuckles) 50 00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:10,830 We don't even know what that thing does. 51 00:02:10,930 --> 00:02:11,931 Well... 52 00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:16,169 how-how does one... get it out? 53 00:02:16,269 --> 00:02:19,939 Let me see. Now, relax a little, and then you just gently tug. 54 00:02:20,006 --> 00:02:22,542 You ready? And... go. 55 00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:23,977 -(grunting) -Yep, tug it. 56 00:02:24,043 --> 00:02:25,678 -Oh god! -Little tug, little tug, tiny tug. 57 00:02:25,778 --> 00:02:27,313 Little, little tug. Ah, more! 58 00:02:27,380 --> 00:02:30,483 -(moaning) -(grunting) 59 00:02:30,550 --> 00:02:31,885 -Blackbeard: Ahh! -Captain Stede: Ooh! 60 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,887 Blackbeard: Keep going. Keep-- Yeah. 61 00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:36,189 -Yeah, yeah, oh yeah. -My god. 62 00:02:36,289 --> 00:02:37,357 -Blackbeard: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. -(moaning) 63 00:02:37,457 --> 00:02:39,359 -Oh my god. -(moaning) 64 00:02:39,459 --> 00:02:40,026 Oh my god! 65 00:02:40,126 --> 00:02:44,063 (januty pirate tune playing) 66 00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:49,369 And, finally, the man saw who was driving the carriage. 67 00:02:49,469 --> 00:02:54,207 It was an elderly gentleman with a hook... for a head! 68 00:02:54,307 --> 00:02:56,042 A hook for a head? 69 00:02:56,142 --> 00:02:58,044 How does that work? H-How does he even eat? 70 00:02:58,144 --> 00:03:01,915 He doesn't eat. He's got a hook for a head. 71 00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:04,317 -Does it even make sense? -All: No. 72 00:03:04,384 --> 00:03:06,219 -How does he kiss? -It doesn't kiss. 73 00:03:06,319 --> 00:03:08,721 -No one likes him. -It's not scary at all. 74 00:03:08,821 --> 00:03:10,723 I bet Blackbeard knows a scary story. 75 00:03:10,823 --> 00:03:13,059 (pirates agreeing) 76 00:03:13,159 --> 00:03:16,329 What's the scariest thing you've ever seen... sir? 77 00:03:17,931 --> 00:03:20,099 That's hard to say because I don't feel fear. 78 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,701 (impressed murmurs) 79 00:03:21,768 --> 00:03:23,736 But... I think the scariest thing I've ever seen 80 00:03:23,836 --> 00:03:25,205 would probably be... 81 00:03:27,607 --> 00:03:28,942 the Kraken. 82 00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:32,345 The, the Kraken's not real, though. 83 00:03:32,412 --> 00:03:34,847 I remember when I used to think that. 84 00:03:34,914 --> 00:03:36,916 So, is the plan off? 85 00:03:37,016 --> 00:03:39,252 Yeah, I reckon we're not killing this guy now. 86 00:03:39,352 --> 00:03:42,455 The plan is very much alive. 87 00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:46,059 -He promised me. -It just seems that he's having an awfully nice time. 88 00:03:46,125 --> 00:03:48,261 I mean, look at him. He's telling ghost stories. 89 00:03:48,361 --> 00:03:51,431 This is the most open and available I've ever seen him. 90 00:03:51,531 --> 00:03:57,103 There I was... just a young waif on a late-night walk. 91 00:03:57,203 --> 00:03:59,939 -(thunder rumbles) -There, I see an old drunkard 92 00:04:00,039 --> 00:04:03,543 stumbling home past the old stone wall. 93 00:04:03,610 --> 00:04:04,877 And there, out of the corner of my eye, 94 00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:07,914 I caught a glimpse of something stirring in the brine, 95 00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:10,450 some sort of hideous creature. 96 00:04:10,550 --> 00:04:12,785 Its tentacles, they rise up out of the water. 97 00:04:12,885 --> 00:04:14,454 And before I knew it, it grabbed him. 98 00:04:14,554 --> 00:04:15,788 I tried to warn him, but it was too late. 99 00:04:15,888 --> 00:04:17,123 The creature had him now, 100 00:04:17,223 --> 00:04:20,126 in his grasp, flinging him around 101 00:04:20,226 --> 00:04:23,263 before wringing him out like a fucking bar rag. 102 00:04:23,329 --> 00:04:25,131 (frightful music playing) 103 00:04:28,568 --> 00:04:29,936 And that poor wretch? 104 00:04:32,739 --> 00:04:34,340 That was my dad. 105 00:04:36,075 --> 00:04:40,013 Bruh. Kraken killed Blackbeard's pa. 106 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,181 The good news is, my dad was a dick. 107 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,616 (all chuckle) 108 00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:45,852 And I learned something that night: 109 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:50,089 fear is the most powerful emotion. 110 00:04:50,156 --> 00:04:55,461 Turn your enemy's worst fear against them, you'll own them. 111 00:04:55,528 --> 00:04:57,664 -I've often said that. -(all disagree) 112 00:04:57,764 --> 00:04:58,931 I've definitely said that. 113 00:04:58,998 --> 00:05:00,033 Frenchie: Maybe you said it on your own. 114 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,768 Yeah, I may, uh, you-- Yeah. 115 00:05:01,834 --> 00:05:03,002 I may have been on my own. 116 00:05:03,102 --> 00:05:05,038 But on that note... 117 00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:09,042 how do you... go about tapping into an enemy's fear? 118 00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:10,143 You really want to know? 119 00:05:10,209 --> 00:05:12,211 Yeah, I think we'd all be curious. 120 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,814 -Right, gang? -(all agree) 121 00:05:14,881 --> 00:05:17,350 Well, maybe, I will tell you, someday. 122 00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:22,455 But be careful what you ask your God for... 123 00:05:22,522 --> 00:05:24,490 (ominous music plays) 124 00:05:24,557 --> 00:05:25,191 She might just answer. 125 00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:31,497 -Captain! Avast ye! -Ooh! 126 00:05:31,564 --> 00:05:34,801 There's somethin' witchy afoot! 127 00:05:34,867 --> 00:05:36,569 What?! What, what you talking about? 128 00:05:38,037 --> 00:05:39,072 Witchy?! 129 00:05:40,473 --> 00:05:41,207 How?! 130 00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:44,243 ♪ ♪ 131 00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:48,715 Never known a fog like this. 132 00:05:48,815 --> 00:05:50,883 It's abnormal. 133 00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:53,319 Tastes abnormal, too. 134 00:05:56,222 --> 00:05:58,358 I suppose it is a tad off. 135 00:05:58,424 --> 00:05:59,525 Anyone seen Blackbeard? 136 00:05:59,592 --> 00:06:02,428 -Blackbeard: Over here, child. -Oh god. He's there! 137 00:06:02,528 --> 00:06:03,429 (thunder) 138 00:06:03,529 --> 00:06:05,665 -Agh! -Ow, you bit me! What the fuck?! 139 00:06:05,732 --> 00:06:07,533 I thought you were the demon, boy! 140 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:09,068 Or am I here? 141 00:06:10,336 --> 00:06:10,370 What? 142 00:06:12,572 --> 00:06:17,243 -(thunder) -Flee and survive, or face me and burn! 143 00:06:17,343 --> 00:06:20,713 -(maniacal laughter) -(fearful shouting) 144 00:06:23,416 --> 00:06:25,351 Every man for himself! 145 00:06:25,418 --> 00:06:29,188 Oh, whoa, hey, okay! Boys, give it a rest! 146 00:06:29,255 --> 00:06:30,390 We've got a man overboard! 147 00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:36,763 Ugh, it's a bit too much atmosphere anyway. 148 00:06:36,863 --> 00:06:37,296 It's my fault, boss! 149 00:06:41,801 --> 00:06:43,302 It's all an illusion! Brilliant! 150 00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:47,540 Exactly. Or as I like to call it, The Art of Fuckery. 151 00:06:47,607 --> 00:06:52,779 Sorry, laddie. Ye triggered my fight or bite response. 152 00:06:52,879 --> 00:06:54,247 Why do I have a splinter? 153 00:06:54,313 --> 00:06:56,983 Oh... that'll be from me "summer" teef. 154 00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:02,789 -Some are teef. -Oh my god. 155 00:07:02,889 --> 00:07:05,792 Some ain't. (laughs) 156 00:07:05,892 --> 00:07:07,794 -May I have a word? -Captain Stede: It's a bit like theater isn't it, Ed? 157 00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:09,162 The Theater of Fear. 158 00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:10,997 Ha! "Theater of Fear." Love that. 159 00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:13,499 His name is Blackbeard, dog! 160 00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,903 Well, I'll leave you to it. 161 00:07:16,969 --> 00:07:17,970 It looks like there's trouble in paradise. 162 00:07:18,070 --> 00:07:19,939 Can you get up here and let me out of this thing? 163 00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:22,675 -I can't feel my balls. -But, but we need to talk. 164 00:07:22,775 --> 00:07:23,776 What the fuck you doin' with your head between my legs? 165 00:07:23,843 --> 00:07:26,279 -Stop. Unbuckle the fuckin'-- -(Izzy grumbling) 166 00:07:26,345 --> 00:07:29,849 -No, you're tightening it! No, shut up! Up on top here. -(Izzy grumbling) 167 00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:31,984 -That's my-- no, that's my hips. -That's it! That is it! 168 00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:35,855 You seem to know everything about everything in the whole fuckin' world! 169 00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:38,157 (stammering) 170 00:07:38,257 --> 00:07:39,325 Blackbeard: Izzy! 171 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:41,160 Izzy! 172 00:07:42,094 --> 00:07:43,162 Izzy! 173 00:07:43,262 --> 00:07:44,964 That was embarrassing! 174 00:07:50,002 --> 00:07:52,472 You left me hangin' up there for 20 minutes. Not bloody optimal. 175 00:07:55,007 --> 00:07:55,374 What the fuck's all this? 176 00:07:58,611 --> 00:08:01,380 Do you remember your policy about pets aboard your vessel? 177 00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:04,350 Pets? Yeah. No pets. They befoul the ship. 178 00:08:04,450 --> 00:08:05,718 Ivan: You know what else you said? 179 00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:08,554 You said the love of a pet makes a man weak. 180 00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:11,290 -I said that? -Yeah, when I joined your crew, 181 00:08:11,357 --> 00:08:13,192 you made me put my dog down. 182 00:08:13,292 --> 00:08:16,562 Yeah, okay, well, yeah, vaguely... remember that. 183 00:08:16,662 --> 00:08:18,364 So, here's the rub: Me and the boys, 184 00:08:18,464 --> 00:08:19,866 we think you've begun to view 185 00:08:19,966 --> 00:08:20,867 Bonnet as a sort of a pet. 186 00:08:20,967 --> 00:08:22,235 -Mm-hm. -Hm. 187 00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:24,904 Izzy: You're in too deep, Edward. 188 00:08:25,004 --> 00:08:26,072 Best thing to do... 189 00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:28,574 -end it quick. -Yeah. 190 00:08:28,674 --> 00:08:30,576 The longer you wait, the harder it gets... 191 00:08:32,979 --> 00:08:33,379 (cries) They're just pets. 192 00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:37,250 (Fang crying) 193 00:08:39,151 --> 00:08:41,153 It's all right, Fangy. 194 00:08:41,220 --> 00:08:43,656 He's up in doggy heaven now, mate. 195 00:08:43,723 --> 00:08:46,058 Yeah, but we go to different heavens! 196 00:08:46,158 --> 00:08:46,492 (wailing) 197 00:08:49,328 --> 00:08:52,064 He goes to doggy heaven. 198 00:08:52,164 --> 00:08:54,901 (ominous music playing) 199 00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,504 I'll happily end it. 200 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,208 No. 201 00:09:03,009 --> 00:09:04,410 It's my mess. I'll do it. 202 00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:08,848 Maybe while he's doing something he loves. 203 00:09:08,915 --> 00:09:10,249 Captain Stede: Oh, there you are! 204 00:09:10,349 --> 00:09:13,553 Hey, according to Buttons, 205 00:09:13,619 --> 00:09:17,423 we should cross paths with a Dutch merchant ship tomorrow night. 206 00:09:17,523 --> 00:09:19,358 I thought we could take it through a bit of Fuckery. 207 00:09:19,425 --> 00:09:22,261 Oh, mate, that's a bit advanced for you. 208 00:09:22,361 --> 00:09:25,097 A good Fuckery takes ages to develop. 209 00:09:25,197 --> 00:09:27,033 Izzy: As much as I hate to admit it, 210 00:09:27,099 --> 00:09:29,268 Captain Bonnet's theatrical instincts are finely honed. 211 00:09:29,368 --> 00:09:32,071 He's more than up to the challenge. 212 00:09:32,138 --> 00:09:34,874 Well, thank you. Maybe I misjudged you. 213 00:09:35,608 --> 00:09:36,576 Let's do it! 214 00:09:36,642 --> 00:09:41,047 Lucius! We've got a Fuckery on our hands! 215 00:09:41,113 --> 00:09:43,282 What are you doing? You know he's not up for this. 216 00:09:43,382 --> 00:09:44,450 Oh, of course not... 217 00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:46,485 but he would be doing something he loved. 218 00:09:49,889 --> 00:09:52,124 It's time, Edward. 219 00:09:52,224 --> 00:09:56,495 Send him to doggy heaven. 220 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,297 Storytelling. Tell me a story. Go. 221 00:09:58,397 --> 00:10:01,300 -Me? -Yes, engage me. Go! 222 00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:02,635 On the day I was born, 223 00:10:02,735 --> 00:10:07,106 -the rain looked just like blood-- -Boring! Next! 224 00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:10,242 I yearn to make sweet love to the sea-- 225 00:10:10,309 --> 00:10:12,945 Whoa, way too personal! 226 00:10:13,579 --> 00:10:14,480 Go. 227 00:10:16,682 --> 00:10:18,651 -Ah-- -Come on, spit it out! 228 00:10:18,751 --> 00:10:20,820 -I have one. -Terrible. 229 00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:21,520 All of these stories 230 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:24,023 are very bad. Thankfully, 231 00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:25,324 we do have a Master of Horror, 232 00:10:25,424 --> 00:10:28,361 one William Shakespeare, at our disposal. 233 00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,863 What if I hack up a dummy with an axe? 234 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:34,667 Maybe have like... meat and guts and stuff comin' out of it. 235 00:10:34,767 --> 00:10:39,138 I once witnessed a man eatin' another man's face once. 236 00:10:39,205 --> 00:10:41,173 That was pretty vulgar. 237 00:10:41,273 --> 00:10:43,676 That's actually quite a cheap scare. 238 00:10:43,776 --> 00:10:46,779 I'm thinking more along the lines of psychological. 239 00:10:46,846 --> 00:10:51,283 -I've always wanted to sing. -Singing's not scary. 240 00:10:51,350 --> 00:10:53,853 Well, maybe it doesn't always have to be scary. 241 00:10:53,953 --> 00:10:56,689 Maybe, sometimes, it can be an expression of ourselves. 242 00:10:56,789 --> 00:11:00,893 Anyone smell that? Kinda like a... a dead person smell? 243 00:11:02,128 --> 00:11:05,197 -(all gagging) -Oh, Lord above. 244 00:11:05,297 --> 00:11:07,066 Black Pete: Oh my god. 245 00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:09,402 My finger feels like fires. 246 00:11:12,204 --> 00:11:15,508 All right, this rehearsal is already a disaster. 247 00:11:15,574 --> 00:11:18,044 Let's take 20. Get him to the infirmary, 248 00:11:18,144 --> 00:11:19,178 and that's a taut 20. 249 00:11:19,245 --> 00:11:22,715 Fuck... Fuck! 250 00:11:22,815 --> 00:11:26,419 I got his head, I got his head, I got his head. 251 00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:28,054 Get around, I'll hold him here. 252 00:11:28,154 --> 00:11:30,389 (all muttering) 253 00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:31,924 (flies buzzing) 254 00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:34,226 You're a doctor? I thought you were the cook. 255 00:11:34,326 --> 00:11:37,730 Mm, knives are knives, meat's meat. 256 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:43,736 Seems to me the best move here is... amputation. 257 00:11:43,836 --> 00:11:45,871 Oh, for God's sake! He's a visual artist. 258 00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:48,240 You can't cut the boy's little fingies. 259 00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:50,876 Level with us, man. 260 00:11:50,943 --> 00:11:54,246 -There's no better option? -Not in my professional opinion. 261 00:11:54,346 --> 00:11:56,515 -Hold him down. -Okay. 262 00:11:56,582 --> 00:11:58,784 I'll whack it off in one go. Or two. Or three. 263 00:11:58,884 --> 00:12:02,855 -What's happening? Am I dead? -Uh, no, no, no, baby. 264 00:12:02,922 --> 00:12:04,757 (screams) No! No! 265 00:12:04,857 --> 00:12:07,760 -It's just a dream! -Black Pete: Hey, where are you goin'-- 266 00:12:07,860 --> 00:12:10,262 This is all a dream. Come back! 267 00:12:17,970 --> 00:12:20,639 Muse, why have you forsaken me? 268 00:12:24,977 --> 00:12:25,644 Izzy: How goes the Fuckery? 269 00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:31,217 What are you doing in here? 270 00:12:31,283 --> 00:12:33,219 I've just been takin' in your library. 271 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:37,389 What a perverse misuse of space. 272 00:12:37,456 --> 00:12:41,460 Still, it's a nice room. Lots of possibilities. 273 00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:42,962 Yes, well, I designed it for flow. 274 00:12:43,062 --> 00:12:44,830 So, if you'd kindly piss off, the Fuckery's canceled. 275 00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:48,400 You can't cancel it. 276 00:12:48,467 --> 00:12:51,937 I went out on a limb for you, you little shit. 277 00:12:52,004 --> 00:12:54,907 Not my problem. Why'd you even do it in the first place? 278 00:12:54,974 --> 00:12:59,078 Because it's my job to make sure that Edward is content. 279 00:12:59,145 --> 00:13:01,447 And he adores you. 280 00:13:02,982 --> 00:13:06,685 Why, I'll never know, but... he does. 281 00:13:08,587 --> 00:13:09,655 So, plumb the depths, man. 282 00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:16,695 Perform... like it's your last day on Earth. 283 00:13:19,298 --> 00:13:20,833 (footsteps receding) 284 00:13:20,933 --> 00:13:24,670 -You're doin' the-- He's gonna-- -(indistinct chatter) 285 00:13:24,770 --> 00:13:26,205 Captain Stede: Hello. 286 00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,774 I'd like to apologize for my, my behavior earlier. 287 00:13:28,841 --> 00:13:32,678 As total as my theatrical knowledge may be, 288 00:13:32,778 --> 00:13:35,614 -I did forget the most important thing. -Oh, to be interesting? 289 00:13:35,681 --> 00:13:35,781 Company. 290 00:13:37,850 --> 00:13:38,717 We are a company. 291 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:43,055 Um, and so, this work is a shared vision. 292 00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:45,858 Now, we've only got a couple of hours to put this thing together. 293 00:13:45,958 --> 00:13:48,360 Yeah, we've already figured it out, actually, mostly. 294 00:13:48,460 --> 00:13:50,563 -What? -Yeah, we figured out a bunch of, like, really scary stuff. 295 00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:52,865 -Yeah. -And I'm going to sing. 296 00:13:52,965 --> 00:13:54,567 Yeah, right, The Swede's gonna sing. 297 00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:55,968 Anyways, it's gonna be excellent. 298 00:13:56,035 --> 00:13:58,370 The one thing we haven't got is the finale. 299 00:13:58,470 --> 00:14:01,140 Hm, I may have something. 300 00:14:02,875 --> 00:14:05,578 Something that'll really plumb the depths. 301 00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:11,050 You're a killer, bro. You're a fuckin' killer. 302 00:14:11,150 --> 00:14:13,652 So kill! 303 00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:20,993 -Uh, Mr. Blackbeard, sir? -Yeah? 304 00:14:21,060 --> 00:14:23,495 Uh, we'll be approaching the vessel in a few moments, 305 00:14:23,562 --> 00:14:25,764 and Captain wanted me to show you to your seat. 306 00:14:26,532 --> 00:14:30,870 All right. Let's do this. 307 00:14:30,936 --> 00:14:32,605 So, Captain figures that 308 00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:36,242 this will be the best view for you 309 00:14:36,342 --> 00:14:38,010 for when they come aboard. 310 00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:40,279 -When they come aboard? -Yeah. 311 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,281 No, no. Aren't we supposed to be raiding them? 312 00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:45,417 Yeah, he's reimagined things a bit, all right? 313 00:14:45,517 --> 00:14:49,388 (ominous music playing) 314 00:14:56,262 --> 00:14:58,864 Appears abandoned, right? 315 00:14:58,931 --> 00:15:01,267 Yeah, I mean, seems like it, right? 316 00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:03,969 All: Yeah, yeah. 317 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:07,539 Well, let's go have a look. 318 00:15:07,606 --> 00:15:11,310 Hello? Anybody home? 319 00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:13,779 Only us spirits... 320 00:15:13,879 --> 00:15:18,617 from the wretched, burning depths of Hades, methinks! 321 00:15:18,717 --> 00:15:20,986 The Swede: What is wrong, Nederlandska? 322 00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:23,622 Have you stumbled onto something... 323 00:15:23,722 --> 00:15:27,826 ...beyond your comprehension? Ha-ha! 324 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:32,998 Um, are those supposed to be the same guys? 325 00:15:33,098 --> 00:15:35,434 With very different hairstyles, no? 326 00:15:35,501 --> 00:15:40,406 I am a witch, and this is my cat! 327 00:15:40,472 --> 00:15:44,610 -(meows and hisses) -(cackling) 328 00:15:46,078 --> 00:15:49,782 Ooh, hey! The opening went great. 329 00:15:49,848 --> 00:15:52,818 -I thought I heard laughter. -Oh, no. That was screams. 330 00:15:52,918 --> 00:15:55,020 -(indistinct chatter) -Oh, here they come. Watch this. 331 00:15:58,257 --> 00:16:00,459 (frantic violins playing) 332 00:16:02,494 --> 00:16:05,531 (meowing) I'm the Black Cat of Death. 333 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,035 (laughing) 334 00:16:12,471 --> 00:16:13,505 -(growling) -Captain, look! 335 00:16:13,605 --> 00:16:16,108 Hello? What is happening here? 336 00:16:16,709 --> 00:16:19,511 Terrifying, isn't it? 337 00:16:19,611 --> 00:16:22,348 Yeah, man, it's... scary as hell. 338 00:16:26,285 --> 00:16:28,654 (Jim laughing) 339 00:16:29,788 --> 00:16:32,358 (screaming) Have mercy! 340 00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:34,193 (wild laughter) 341 00:16:34,293 --> 00:16:35,060 (door opens) 342 00:16:37,730 --> 00:16:38,964 Ooh! 343 00:16:39,031 --> 00:16:40,199 They can't cut off my finger 344 00:16:40,299 --> 00:16:41,900 if there's no finger to cut off. 345 00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:46,572 (Dutch sailors exclaiming) 346 00:16:48,140 --> 00:16:49,908 (all gagging) 347 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:52,177 Shit, that was incredible. 348 00:16:52,244 --> 00:16:54,079 -How'd you do that? -I don't know. 349 00:16:54,179 --> 00:16:55,914 I'll have to ask the little bugger. 350 00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:59,752 (angelic singing) 351 00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:03,489 -Oh, this is my cue. -Is that The Swede? 352 00:17:03,555 --> 00:17:06,658 Yeah, that's our little Nordic angel. 353 00:17:06,725 --> 00:17:09,061 Keep watching. Big finale coming up. 354 00:17:09,161 --> 00:17:12,564 It would appear the siren's song has awoken a beast! 355 00:17:12,664 --> 00:17:16,001 Not mere whale nor shark. 356 00:17:16,068 --> 00:17:18,337 'Tis the greatest terror of the sea! 357 00:17:18,404 --> 00:17:20,773 The Kraken! 358 00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:23,075 Enough nonsense! 359 00:17:23,175 --> 00:17:25,511 (banging on window) 360 00:17:27,346 --> 00:17:30,749 (dark violin playing) 361 00:17:33,786 --> 00:17:36,855 (yelling) 362 00:17:37,523 --> 00:17:39,258 (crying) 363 00:17:39,358 --> 00:17:40,926 -Blackbeard! -Ooh! 364 00:17:41,026 --> 00:17:44,029 -Blackbeard! Blackbeard! -(all exclaiming) 365 00:17:46,098 --> 00:17:48,100 (breathing heavily) 366 00:17:51,403 --> 00:17:53,872 -(all shouting) -Abandon ship! Abandon ship! 367 00:17:53,939 --> 00:17:57,142 -Black Cat of Death! -Good pussycat! 368 00:17:57,242 --> 00:18:01,113 -Bravo, Wee John! Bravo. -(cheers, laughter) 369 00:18:01,213 --> 00:18:03,082 (knock on door) 370 00:18:03,148 --> 00:18:05,250 Edward? You all right? 371 00:18:06,385 --> 00:18:07,286 (knocks on door) 372 00:18:07,386 --> 00:18:09,288 -Edward? -(knocking continues) 373 00:18:09,388 --> 00:18:11,223 Slop! 374 00:18:12,891 --> 00:18:15,394 You want to tell me why that's all you ever cook? 375 00:18:16,128 --> 00:18:18,263 It's what we can afford. 376 00:18:19,331 --> 00:18:20,466 -(slaps) -(Mother winces) 377 00:18:22,134 --> 00:18:23,569 I gotta get out of here. 378 00:18:26,405 --> 00:18:27,272 (door slams) 379 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:29,007 (door breaks) 380 00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:31,910 Captain Stede: Edward! 381 00:18:34,580 --> 00:18:35,414 Ed? 382 00:18:41,353 --> 00:18:43,255 The Kraken didn't kill my dad. 383 00:18:44,756 --> 00:18:46,091 I did. 384 00:18:46,158 --> 00:18:48,093 (thunder rumbling) 385 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:49,495 (young Blackbeard groaning) 386 00:18:50,629 --> 00:18:52,030 I'm the Kraken. 387 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:59,204 If I'm honest... I haven't killed another man since. 388 00:19:01,473 --> 00:19:02,207 Not personally. 389 00:19:04,943 --> 00:19:08,480 I mean... I have seen you maim some people. 390 00:19:08,547 --> 00:19:11,016 Maiming's different. Love a good maim. 391 00:19:12,351 --> 00:19:15,154 But... I always outsource the big job. 392 00:19:17,489 --> 00:19:20,459 And tonight... 393 00:19:20,526 --> 00:19:24,029 I'm supposed to kill... you. 394 00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:27,032 Oh. 395 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,869 I was supposed to burn off your face... 396 00:19:32,871 --> 00:19:34,740 and take your identity. 397 00:19:36,141 --> 00:19:37,242 And, um... 398 00:19:39,578 --> 00:19:41,513 is that still on the cards, or? 399 00:19:43,649 --> 00:19:45,551 (relieved sigh) 400 00:19:46,652 --> 00:19:49,221 You don't belong in doggy heaven. 401 00:19:50,822 --> 00:19:52,157 Doggy heaven? 402 00:19:53,992 --> 00:19:55,661 Is that a pirate term, or? 403 00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:01,767 I'm not a good person, Stede. 404 00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:03,101 That's why I don't have any friends. 405 00:20:07,172 --> 00:20:09,208 Hey... I'm your friend. 406 00:20:11,043 --> 00:20:13,879 -No. -Listen, what if... 407 00:20:13,946 --> 00:20:15,447 what if we just pretended that 408 00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:17,449 whole murder idea never happened? 409 00:20:18,350 --> 00:20:21,620 (sniffles) 410 00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:24,122 We could? 411 00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:28,193 I mean, I could... if you could. 412 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:31,797 I think I might like that. 413 00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:35,400 (sighs) I would love that. 414 00:20:40,872 --> 00:20:41,907 Thank you. 415 00:20:44,810 --> 00:20:47,412 (pirates cheering) 416 00:20:51,283 --> 00:20:53,285 Bravo, everyone! 417 00:20:53,385 --> 00:20:57,122 So, uh, Blackbeard, what did you think? 418 00:20:57,222 --> 00:21:00,125 Wonderful Fuckery. Scared the pants off me. 419 00:21:00,225 --> 00:21:02,327 I thought Blackbeard didn't feel fear. 420 00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:04,963 -And I didn't, until today. -Whoa. 421 00:21:05,063 --> 00:21:06,164 And you, what a voice! 422 00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:10,502 -Me? Oh, come on. Don't tease me. -Uh-huh. 423 00:21:10,602 --> 00:21:12,938 Oh, he's not teasing. You sounded like an angel. 424 00:21:13,005 --> 00:21:15,240 -Well done. -(cheers and applause) 425 00:21:15,307 --> 00:21:17,743 And Lucius! Quite the feat. 426 00:21:17,809 --> 00:21:19,645 -Even though it was his hand. -(laughing) 427 00:21:19,745 --> 00:21:22,347 -Where is he? -Shh. He's asleep. 428 00:21:22,447 --> 00:21:26,585 Stede Bonnet! Draw your weapon. 429 00:21:26,652 --> 00:21:29,187 -No, Izzy, we're not doing this. -No, you're not doin' this... 430 00:21:30,922 --> 00:21:32,324 so I must. 431 00:21:33,925 --> 00:21:37,763 Stede fuckin' Bonnet... 432 00:21:39,097 --> 00:21:42,868 I fuckin' challenge you to a fuckin' duel. 433 00:21:48,307 --> 00:21:51,209 -Well, I accept your challenge. -(all murmuring) 434 00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:52,811 Uh, he's really pretty good. 435 00:21:52,878 --> 00:21:55,013 Stede, be careful. He does know his shit. 436 00:21:55,113 --> 00:21:57,449 As do I. You've taught me well. 437 00:21:58,383 --> 00:21:58,617 Not that well. 438 00:21:58,684 --> 00:22:00,052 Right. 439 00:22:00,152 --> 00:22:03,855 I'm assuming standard duel rules apply. 440 00:22:04,890 --> 00:22:07,192 What are those exactly? 441 00:22:07,292 --> 00:22:10,062 Let's make it interesting, shall we? 442 00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:11,730 The loser is banished from the ship... 443 00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:14,333 if they're not dead. 444 00:22:14,399 --> 00:22:16,068 (Captain Stede yelping) 445 00:22:16,168 --> 00:22:18,870 Come on. Give a man a warning. 446 00:22:18,970 --> 00:22:21,173 That was your warning. 447 00:22:21,239 --> 00:22:23,809 -Come on, Cap. -Psych him out. That's it. Nice. Wiggle the hips. 448 00:22:23,875 --> 00:22:26,311 Nice, Captain. 449 00:22:26,378 --> 00:22:27,679 Good, yes! 450 00:22:27,746 --> 00:22:28,413 (swords clanking) 451 00:22:30,382 --> 00:22:31,216 (yells) 452 00:22:31,316 --> 00:22:32,551 Frenchie: Oh, you cheeky bitch. 453 00:22:32,651 --> 00:22:33,251 (yelling) 454 00:22:38,657 --> 00:22:40,092 Yield or die. 455 00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,729 I choose... this. Aaah! 456 00:22:43,829 --> 00:22:47,232 -Oh! -(cheers and applause) 457 00:22:47,332 --> 00:22:49,434 -Do it now! -Ha-ha! 458 00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:52,337 No! Stab him! For fuck's sake. 459 00:22:55,173 --> 00:22:56,908 Frenchie: Come on, Captain! 460 00:22:57,008 --> 00:22:58,343 Ah... Ah! 461 00:23:01,279 --> 00:23:02,447 (sword clatters) 462 00:23:04,616 --> 00:23:07,285 So, it looks like we've arrived, Bonnet. 463 00:23:07,386 --> 00:23:08,720 The end of the road. 464 00:23:12,424 --> 00:23:14,526 All right... let's call it a draw. 465 00:23:15,026 --> 00:23:16,928 Nah, I'm good. 466 00:23:19,231 --> 00:23:20,766 -(screams) -Ooh! 467 00:23:25,704 --> 00:23:26,438 Did I do it right? 468 00:23:26,538 --> 00:23:29,641 He missed all the important bits. 469 00:23:32,778 --> 00:23:35,881 (grunting) 470 00:23:35,947 --> 00:23:37,449 This mast... 471 00:23:37,549 --> 00:23:41,286 it's made from the finest cherry wood in Brazil. 472 00:23:41,386 --> 00:23:45,557 -It's rather strong, actually. -Shut up! 473 00:23:45,624 --> 00:23:48,660 Don't you ever shut up, you rancid rat! 474 00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:50,729 (sword cracks) 475 00:23:52,097 --> 00:23:54,332 (Buttons laughs) 476 00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:55,300 Well, now, Mr. Hands. 477 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:59,938 Reckon he's rendered your sword inoperable. 478 00:24:00,005 --> 00:24:02,841 -By dueling tradition, that means-- -Stede wins! 479 00:24:02,941 --> 00:24:04,910 (all cheering) 480 00:24:04,976 --> 00:24:07,813 In your face, Jizzy! 481 00:24:07,913 --> 00:24:10,182 (crew laughing) 482 00:24:11,483 --> 00:24:12,951 Aaaaah! 483 00:24:14,686 --> 00:24:15,821 Well played, Cap'n. 484 00:24:15,921 --> 00:24:17,456 (jaunty music playing) 485 00:24:19,758 --> 00:24:21,660 Thanks, Buttons. 486 00:24:21,760 --> 00:24:23,361 So, is this it then? 487 00:24:23,462 --> 00:24:25,430 You're actually allowing this? 488 00:24:25,497 --> 00:24:26,998 You shouldn't've dueled him, Iz! 489 00:24:27,098 --> 00:24:28,433 We could've worked this out. 490 00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:30,502 You will rue this day, Edward. 491 00:24:30,602 --> 00:24:33,271 You will rue it long and you will rue it hard. 492 00:24:33,338 --> 00:24:38,276 Hey... made you a sandwich for the trip. 493 00:24:38,343 --> 00:24:39,711 -(grunts) -Ivan: Hey! 494 00:24:39,811 --> 00:24:45,050 -I would've eaten that. -A fucking pox on all of you. 495 00:24:47,519 --> 00:24:48,820 Well, that's that. 496 00:24:49,988 --> 00:24:55,026 Not for nothing, but that guy really is a dick, huh? 497 00:24:55,126 --> 00:24:58,029 -(light music playing) -Thank you. 498 00:25:00,065 --> 00:25:05,303 Today... we commit a piece of our beloved Lucius to the sea. 499 00:25:06,738 --> 00:25:08,707 Begone, you foul thing! 500 00:25:08,807 --> 00:25:11,510 -(cheers and applause) -A tad inelegant. 501 00:25:11,576 --> 00:25:14,679 He could've skimmed it like a stone or something festive. 502 00:25:15,981 --> 00:25:16,715 So... 503 00:25:16,815 --> 00:25:19,317 uh, listen. 504 00:25:19,384 --> 00:25:23,054 I, I thought I was gonna lose you. 505 00:25:23,154 --> 00:25:25,090 Oh yeah. Well, you nearly did 506 00:25:25,190 --> 00:25:26,725 'cause I had a really bad infection, so. 507 00:25:26,825 --> 00:25:28,093 Exactly. 508 00:25:28,660 --> 00:25:31,396 And, uh, and... 509 00:25:31,496 --> 00:25:34,399 death, you know... I'm used to death, 510 00:25:34,499 --> 00:25:40,205 but, um... but not, um... your death. 511 00:25:41,039 --> 00:25:42,941 Uh, so, anyway, 512 00:25:43,041 --> 00:25:45,443 I, uh, made this for you. 513 00:25:45,544 --> 00:25:49,581 It looks like a thumb, but... it's a finger. 514 00:25:49,681 --> 00:25:52,350 I whittled it. It's, it's dumb. 515 00:25:52,417 --> 00:25:53,618 You don't have to wear it. 516 00:25:58,423 --> 00:25:59,524 I love it. 517 00:26:00,292 --> 00:26:03,261 And I didn't know you whittled. 518 00:26:03,361 --> 00:26:04,896 There's a lot you don't know about me. 519 00:26:06,231 --> 00:26:08,300 Actually, that's kind of it. 520 00:26:11,202 --> 00:26:11,436 (winces) 521 00:26:13,772 --> 00:26:15,373 -You good? -I, I would love it out. 522 00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:18,276 The, uh, um, I-- I'll go get someone. 523 00:26:18,376 --> 00:26:20,111 -Please. -You keep breathin'. 524 00:26:20,211 --> 00:26:21,613 -Thank you. Please. -Okay. 525 00:26:21,713 --> 00:26:22,781 It's been a while. 526 00:26:22,881 --> 00:26:23,448 (grunting) 527 00:26:34,225 --> 00:26:37,896 So, I was thinking, um, should we serve food? 528 00:26:37,963 --> 00:26:39,831 Be a whole other revenue stream, you know? 529 00:26:39,931 --> 00:26:43,635 -A theme night, or maybe Singles Night-- -Shut the fuck up. 530 00:26:43,735 --> 00:26:45,303 I don't pay you to think. 531 00:26:45,403 --> 00:26:48,473 Food means kitchen, menus, waitstaff. 532 00:26:48,573 --> 00:26:50,308 You think I wanna mess with a waitstaff? 533 00:26:50,408 --> 00:26:52,744 You think Jackie don't have enough overhead as it is? 534 00:26:52,811 --> 00:26:55,747 I've a more lucrative proposal in mind. 535 00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:02,520 If you're open to it. 536 00:27:06,925 --> 00:27:07,592 Get this man a drink. 537 00:27:09,294 --> 00:27:12,163 (intense Spanish guitar playing) 538 00:27:26,444 --> 00:27:28,446 ♪ ♪ 539 00:27:43,361 --> 00:27:45,397 ♪ ♪