1
00:00:01,710 --> 00:00:03,003
[DOORBELL RINGS]
2
00:00:06,173 --> 00:00:07,758
[RINGING CONTINUES]
3
00:00:12,221 --> 00:00:13,472
[KNOCKING]
4
00:00:14,765 --> 00:00:17,351
[RINGING CONTINUES]
5
00:00:18,018 --> 00:00:19,686
[KNOCKING CONTINUES]
6
00:00:25,859 --> 00:00:29,029
- Fucking hell. [GRUNTS]
- [WATCH BEEPS]
7
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,156
All right, let's go.
8
00:00:31,156 --> 00:00:32,573
It's 4:00 a.m.
9
00:00:32,573 --> 00:00:34,701
Yeah. We start at 4:00 a.m.
10
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:35,911
I thought you were joking.
11
00:00:35,911 --> 00:00:37,162
How is that a joke?
12
00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:38,580
'Cause it's 4:00 a.m.
13
00:00:39,581 --> 00:00:42,251
We start at 4:00, so you can do
three workouts a day instead of two.
14
00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:46,296
[SIGHS] Okay, but it's 4:00 a.m.
15
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:48,590
Do you wanna be better than Zava or not?
16
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,719
[SIGHS] Well, how are we
gonna see? It's dark out.
17
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,431
Fucking hell.
18
00:00:56,932 --> 00:00:59,560
Now get dressed. Or I
start flicking your balls.
19
00:01:00,811 --> 00:01:01,854
This is perverse.
20
00:01:18,370 --> 00:01:20,080
[SIGHS]
21
00:01:33,844 --> 00:01:35,721
[CHUCKLES] Whoops.
22
00:01:49,651 --> 00:01:52,529
[SIGHS] There you go.
23
00:02:00,329 --> 00:02:01,330
[GRUNTS]
24
00:02:06,293 --> 00:02:07,669
Good morning, Sassy Smurf.
25
00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:11,924
- Good morning, Marlboro Man.
- [CHUCKLES]
26
00:02:11,924 --> 00:02:14,218
You know, you snored all night.
27
00:02:14,218 --> 00:02:16,595
Hmm. I'm sorry about that. [SIGHS]
28
00:02:16,595 --> 00:02:18,764
That's all right. It's
actually very soothing.
29
00:02:18,764 --> 00:02:20,057
Sounded like the sea.
30
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,768
Well, I'm glad you didn't
hear any boat horns,
31
00:02:22,768 --> 00:02:25,604
given all the fried
yams I ate last night.
32
00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:27,147
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
33
00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:29,107
Oh.
34
00:02:30,943 --> 00:02:34,446
Hey, I was thinking. We have
a good time together, yeah?
35
00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:37,157
They're called simultaneous
orgasms, Ted, yes.
36
00:02:37,866 --> 00:02:39,743
Yeah, well, but I mean
37
00:02:39,743 --> 00:02:43,247
also all the talking and
laughing and all that stuff. Yeah?
38
00:02:43,247 --> 00:02:46,500
Sure. Well, apart from
all your dreadful puns.
39
00:02:47,376 --> 00:02:49,630
Right. Well, it's tough.
Sometimes I just see 'em there,
40
00:02:49,631 --> 00:02:51,937
and I gotta take a
swing at 'em, you know?
41
00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:55,968
No, I... Well, what
I'm getting at is, um...
42
00:02:58,262 --> 00:03:00,514
Well, I was just thinking
maybe... [INHALES DEEPLY]
43
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,308
... we could go on an
actual date sometime.
44
00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:06,562
You know? You and me,
together. [CHUCKLES]
45
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:08,814
God, no.
46
00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:12,442
Well, I appreciate you taking
the time to consider it.
47
00:03:12,442 --> 00:03:14,736
Ted, we can't date.
48
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:15,737
Why not?
49
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:19,074
- You're a mess.
- I'm a mess?
50
00:03:19,658 --> 00:03:20,701
Course you are.
51
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:24,162
I'm a mess too, but I'm a mess
three years further on than you,
52
00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:26,582
so I'm more of a slight disarray.
53
00:03:26,582 --> 00:03:28,792
More like a slight disarray
of sunshine, if you ask me.
54
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,210
Oh, God.
55
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:33,839
- Sorry.
- Ted, on the day my ex got remarried,
56
00:03:33,839 --> 00:03:36,675
I drank a bottle of
red wine through a straw
57
00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:39,887
and told my Uber driver
I was in love with him.
58
00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:43,682
Then, when he dropped
me home, I puked so much,
59
00:03:43,682 --> 00:03:46,768
my mouth was like an elevator
from the goddamn Shining.
60
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Knocked my rating down to a 3.9.
61
00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:51,356
3.9? Ooh.
62
00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:54,151
Fuck you. Why? What's yours?
63
00:03:55,819 --> 00:03:58,197
Oh, God, you're a five, aren't you?
64
00:03:59,156 --> 00:04:01,742
Course you're a five. How
the fuck are you a five?
65
00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:04,703
I don't know. I'm tidy. I
say "Please" and "Thank you."
66
00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:06,788
Sometimes I offer to
drive if they look tired.
67
00:04:07,289 --> 00:04:10,417
Oh, you are such a mess.
68
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:12,252
[SIGHS]
69
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:16,380
Ted, I like our status.
70
00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:22,012
Friends with benefits, like
Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher.
71
00:04:22,012 --> 00:04:25,224
Oh, no, no, no. I think
you're thinking of 2011's other
72
00:04:25,224 --> 00:04:27,392
good-friends-turned-casual-lovers
based rom-com.
73
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:30,937
No Strings Attached.
74
00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:34,650
Friends with Benefits was Mila
Kunis and Justin Timberlake.
75
00:04:34,650 --> 00:04:38,237
Oh, wow. 2011, friends be fuckin'.
76
00:04:38,237 --> 00:04:39,363
Mm-hmm, yeah.
77
00:04:39,363 --> 00:04:42,449
So, let's keep things
2011. Cool and breezy.
78
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:45,410
- Like an Arab Spring.
- [CHUCKLES] Mmm.
79
00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:51,124
[KISSES] And good luck
against West Ham this weekend.
80
00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:52,751
- Mmm.
- Fuck Rupert
81
00:04:52,751 --> 00:04:56,046
and that shriveled
raisin-pouch he calls a nutsack.
82
00:05:02,636 --> 00:05:05,389
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
83
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:13,146
Hello! Here for Flo?
84
00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:14,940
- You can jump in, love.
- Lovely, thank you.
85
00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:18,819
Ooh, this is nice.
Gray seats? Yes, please.
86
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,863
[RADIO PRESENTER] ... West Ham.
This is the real opportunity
87
00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:22,573
for the Wonder Kid to
become the Wonder Man...
88
00:05:22,573 --> 00:05:24,074
[ROY] 101.
89
00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:26,410
100.
90
00:05:26,410 --> 00:05:28,996
- [GRUNTS]
- [ROY] Ninety-nine.
91
00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:31,665
[GRUNTS, GROANS]
92
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:33,458
[GAGS, COUGHS]
93
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:35,127
Why do you only sleep with a top on?
94
00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:39,006
Because I get cold
upstairs and hot downstairs.
95
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,133
Hmm. I get that.
96
00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:44,386
[RETCHES, GRUNTS]
97
00:05:44,386 --> 00:05:45,721
Mornin'.
98
00:05:45,721 --> 00:05:48,056
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
99
00:06:07,868 --> 00:06:10,120
[REBECCA] Oh, listen to
what Rupert said in this one.
100
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:14,041
"I truly look forward to
seeing my old club again.
101
00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:16,335
Richmond are top-class."
102
00:06:16,335 --> 00:06:18,879
Ugh, what a soggy, wet piece of shit.
103
00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:20,214
- Thank you.
- Mmm.
104
00:06:20,214 --> 00:06:21,298
[DOOR OPENS]
105
00:06:21,298 --> 00:06:22,712
Right, I'm off to the training ground.
106
00:06:22,713 --> 00:06:24,801
Thanks again for the opportunity.
107
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:27,846
Babe, you earned it.
108
00:06:27,846 --> 00:06:31,058
Shandy came up with this
super fun Bantr promo.
109
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It uses all the single
players on the team.
110
00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:34,436
[SHANDY] Yeah.
111
00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:36,273
The anonymous man you're Bantr-ing with
112
00:06:36,274 --> 00:06:38,524
could be a professional footballer.
113
00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:41,818
- Mmm?
- Oh, that's great.
114
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,613
And that's all the
single players, you say?
115
00:06:44,613 --> 00:06:48,700
So, it's, like, Colin and
Dani and Sam, et cetera?
116
00:06:48,700 --> 00:06:50,953
Yeah, although I don't
think Sam's doing it anymore.
117
00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:54,373
- [MOUTHING] No.
- Mmm. So fun.
118
00:06:54,957 --> 00:06:58,168
- [CLEARS THROAT] Um, Ms. Jones.
- Hello, Barbara.
119
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- All right there, Barbs?
- It's "Barbara."
120
00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:02,555
Um, if possible, could I get two tickets
121
00:07:02,556 --> 00:07:04,925
for the Richmond-West Ham match?
122
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:07,052
Jack might be coming
to London this weekend.
123
00:07:07,052 --> 00:07:08,303
Of course.
124
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Who's Jack?
125
00:07:11,557 --> 00:07:12,599
[CHUCKLES]
126
00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,476
- Jack Danvers.
- Mmm?
127
00:07:14,977 --> 00:07:18,105
The head of the VC that
funded your company.
128
00:07:19,231 --> 00:07:20,691
Our boss.
129
00:07:23,318 --> 00:07:27,030
Yes. That Jack. Of course.
130
00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:29,908
- Uh...
- That's not a problem, Barbara.
131
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I can let you have
some seats in my suite.
132
00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:35,497
Oh. [CHUCKLES] Lovely.
133
00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:38,750
Thank you so much, Rebecca. That's
so kind of you and so efficient.
134
00:07:41,086 --> 00:07:42,254
[CLICKS TONGUE] Keeley.
135
00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:47,926
Thanks, Barbara. [SIGHS]
136
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:52,931
So, the one thing we cannot do
against West Ham is the False Nine.
137
00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:54,892
- 'Cause that's Nate's shit.
- [COACH BEARD] Exactly.
138
00:07:54,892 --> 00:07:57,269
So, we decided to go
with our classic 4-4-2.
139
00:07:57,269 --> 00:07:59,521
Which is exactly what that
prick expects us to do.
140
00:07:59,521 --> 00:08:02,399
So, we do the opposite. Five
up front. Full-on attack.
141
00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:05,944
But Nate knows we're gonna do that,
142
00:08:05,944 --> 00:08:07,880
because Nate knows that we're trying
143
00:08:07,881 --> 00:08:09,990
to outthink him by thinking like him.
144
00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:14,786
Well, fuck Nate, fuck thinking
and fuck fucking Socrates.
145
00:08:14,786 --> 00:08:17,122
So, we gotta stop thinking
like Nate and start thinking
146
00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:19,917
like Nate would think we would
think if Nate were thinking like us,
147
00:08:19,917 --> 00:08:22,085
and then do the last thing
that Nate thinking like us
148
00:08:22,085 --> 00:08:25,172
thinking like Nate thinking like
us would ever expect us to do.
149
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:30,677
Have Zava drop back and
play Nate's False Nine.
150
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:31,970
Voi-fucking-là.
151
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:34,222
Brilliant.
152
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:36,475
- Ah, it's mostly Beard's idea.
- Nah, it was a group effort.
153
00:08:36,475 --> 00:08:37,601
I do have one question.
154
00:08:37,601 --> 00:08:38,977
- Of course.
- Who fucking cares?
155
00:08:40,270 --> 00:08:41,813
Do you think Zava'll do it?
156
00:08:48,737 --> 00:08:49,863
Fuck!
157
00:08:51,573 --> 00:08:53,158
- Good mornin'.
- Hey.
158
00:08:53,158 --> 00:08:55,035
- [ROY SIGHS, GROANS]
- Oh. Oh.
159
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:57,871
- Uh-oh, what's wrong? - Roy
doesn't think we can beat Nate.
160
00:08:57,871 --> 00:09:01,667
- Higgins doesn't think so either!
- [GASPS] Beard said it to me first.
161
00:09:01,667 --> 00:09:04,795
- You throw me under the bus? How dare...
- You walked in here this morning...
162
00:09:04,795 --> 00:09:08,257
- Oh, you're gonna sell me out?
- Whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
163
00:09:08,257 --> 00:09:11,093
Y'all pointin' more fingers
than Ganesha givin' directions.
164
00:09:11,093 --> 00:09:14,596
Now look, you fellas need
to calm down and just kiss.
165
00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:18,225
He's right.
166
00:09:20,352 --> 00:09:21,687
Keep it simple, smartypants.
167
00:09:21,687 --> 00:09:24,314
- [GROANS]
- An answer will show up. Don't worry.
168
00:09:25,107 --> 00:09:29,403
But until it does, here's a
question for y'all: Am I a mess?
169
00:09:31,446 --> 00:09:34,449
[STAMMERS] Sassy ended up spending
the night last night and, uh...
170
00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:36,827
- [COACH BEARD, HIGGINS] Ooh.
- No, no, no, hush your butts.
171
00:09:36,827 --> 00:09:38,287
That ain't the headline.
172
00:09:38,287 --> 00:09:40,455
Well, I asked her out on
a proper date this morning.
173
00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:41,460
She turned me down cold.
174
00:09:41,461 --> 00:09:44,608
She said I was... and I
quote... "a mess." [SIGHS]
175
00:09:44,668 --> 00:09:48,005
- Ooh.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
176
00:09:48,005 --> 00:09:51,383
Sounds like a case for the Diamond Dogs!
177
00:09:51,383 --> 00:09:52,843
Release the hounds. [HOWLING]
178
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:55,053
Yeah, here we go! Let's do it.
179
00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:58,265
[HOWLING, BARKING]
180
00:09:59,057 --> 00:10:00,893
Fuck's sakes.
181
00:10:02,227 --> 00:10:05,105
[HOWLING, BARKING CONTINUES]
182
00:10:05,898 --> 00:10:06,898
Yes.
183
00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:09,651
- "Yes" what?
- Yes, you're a mess.
184
00:10:09,651 --> 00:10:11,486
Okay. Expound.
185
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:12,696
We're playing Nate this week,
186
00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:14,323
and you're acting like
it's not a big deal.
187
00:10:15,199 --> 00:10:16,867
Nothing's different. He didn't hurt you.
188
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:18,827
Hey, look, we ain't talking
about Nate right now.
189
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:21,914
I'm asking you if you
think I'm a mess. All right?
190
00:10:21,914 --> 00:10:23,081
Higgy pie, what do you think?
191
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:26,919
I think I don't understand how
you're not pissed off with Nate.
192
00:10:26,919 --> 00:10:28,212
[GROANS]
193
00:10:28,212 --> 00:10:30,714
We have a saying in
Co-Dependents Anonymous.
194
00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:31,715
Y... What?
195
00:10:31,715 --> 00:10:33,383
Uh, Jane makes me go with her.
196
00:10:33,383 --> 00:10:34,760
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah.
197
00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:36,887
[SIGHS] Pain is like carbon monoxide.
198
00:10:36,887 --> 00:10:38,595
[SIGHS] Expressing it to the person
199
00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:40,891
who hurt you is like opening a vent,
200
00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:43,185
but holding it in will poison you.
201
00:10:43,185 --> 00:10:46,772
[WHISTLES] I like that.
But Nate didn't hurt me.
202
00:10:46,772 --> 00:10:47,940
Bullshit!
203
00:10:49,775 --> 00:10:52,069
Oh, Roy, did you wanna get in
on this Diamond Dog situation?
204
00:10:52,069 --> 00:10:54,738
- Hey, Roy! [KISSING] Hey, Roy.
- [COACH BEARD] Hey, Roy. Here, Roy.
205
00:10:54,738 --> 00:10:56,907
- [BARKING]
- Here, Roy. Come here, Roy.
206
00:10:56,907 --> 00:10:58,951
La, la, la, la, la!
207
00:10:58,951 --> 00:11:02,996
So, the match of the week is
clearly Richmond and West Ham.
208
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:05,791
Now, it's been a strong start to
the season for both of these teams,
209
00:11:05,791 --> 00:11:09,002
but I think the Hammers are favorites,
going into the London derby,
210
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:12,506
based on the tactical acumen of
the Wonder Kid, Nathan Shelley.
211
00:11:12,506 --> 00:11:14,550
- [BOOS]
- [ALL GROAN]
212
00:11:14,550 --> 00:11:17,261
Yeah, Shelley is brilliant,
there's no doubt about that,
213
00:11:17,261 --> 00:11:20,889
but Zava, he is a genius. I like
the Greyhounds for this one.
214
00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:22,266
- [PLAYERS CHEER]
- That's my guy!
215
00:11:22,266 --> 00:11:24,226
No, you can't have him. He's mine.
216
00:11:24,226 --> 00:11:26,562
[PLAYERS CHUCKLE]
217
00:11:26,562 --> 00:11:29,064
- Let's move on, shall we, to Sunday's...
- [THIERRY] Hey, look. Guys, guys.
218
00:11:29,064 --> 00:11:30,232
Who cares, right?
219
00:11:30,232 --> 00:11:31,441
[PLAYERS CHATTERING]
220
00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:33,318
Now come on, we've got
work to do. Let's go.
221
00:11:33,318 --> 00:11:35,320
- [PLAYERS CHATTERING]
- [ZAVA] He is correct.
222
00:11:37,990 --> 00:11:42,619
We must ignore these talking faces.
Even when they are in our favor.
223
00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:44,663
Thank you, "Zorro."
224
00:11:44,663 --> 00:11:48,250
Oh, exactly, but it's, uh... It's
actually pronounced, uh, "Zoreaux."
225
00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:52,796
Why?
226
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:57,467
I don't know. Because that's
how my parents say it, I guess?
227
00:11:59,136 --> 00:12:04,057
My friend, you can be
whoever you want to be.
228
00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:07,779
I let all of my children name themselves
229
00:12:07,780 --> 00:12:09,668
once they reach the age of seven.
230
00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:13,984
That is why my eldest is
called "Smingus Dingus."
231
00:12:15,110 --> 00:12:19,323
- Mmm.
- Dream big, and you may never wake up.
232
00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:24,995
Thank you.
233
00:12:24,995 --> 00:12:26,413
Jesus.
234
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:27,700
I can't believe I'm about to say this,
235
00:12:27,701 --> 00:12:30,626
but hey, lads, I agree with Zava.
236
00:12:30,626 --> 00:12:31,990
Yes, it's a big fucking game,
237
00:12:31,991 --> 00:12:33,754
but we've just gotta
focus, do what we do,
238
00:12:33,754 --> 00:12:35,464
- do you know what I mean?
- Yeah. He's right.
239
00:12:35,464 --> 00:12:36,673
And don't forget, yeah?
240
00:12:40,761 --> 00:12:43,972
- Believe in "Believe."
- Yes.
241
00:12:43,972 --> 00:12:45,933
- [GASPING] Whoa!
- Whoa! What the...
242
00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:47,768
What?
243
00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:49,895
- [CLICKS TONGUE] Oh, shit.
- What?
244
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:52,439
Oh.
245
00:12:55,317 --> 00:12:57,611
- Why the fuck did you do that?
- I was just checking
246
00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:59,571
if I acquired the ability
to chop things in half.
247
00:13:00,072 --> 00:13:01,073
Yeah, and what if you had?
248
00:13:02,950 --> 00:13:04,743
Sorry, bruv. I didn't think it through.
249
00:13:05,244 --> 00:13:06,245
[STAMMERS]
250
00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:09,873
Fellas. Someone ripped this in half.
251
00:13:09,873 --> 00:13:11,416
What the fuck? What?
252
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,293
[PLAYER] What the fuck?
253
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:15,379
- [ALL CHATTERING]
- [PLAYER] You're joking.
254
00:13:18,382 --> 00:13:19,383
[PLAYER] What the fuck?
255
00:13:19,383 --> 00:13:21,468
[GREEK MUSIC PLAYING]
256
00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:43,949
Oh, hello...
257
00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:45,993
Jade.
258
00:13:48,537 --> 00:13:49,538
Nathan.
259
00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:52,541
Shelley.
260
00:13:54,543 --> 00:13:56,003
Lovely to see you again. [CHUCKLES]
261
00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:57,296
Okay.
262
00:13:58,672 --> 00:14:00,924
[SMACKS LIPS] Sorry I've not
been around much. [CHUCKLES]
263
00:14:01,550 --> 00:14:02,676
You haven't?
264
00:14:02,676 --> 00:14:06,722
No. No, I've been, uh, really
busy with, uh... with my new job.
265
00:14:06,722 --> 00:14:11,476
Big, big new job just keeping
me... [GROANS] ... very busy.
266
00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:15,105
Sounds silly. Maybe you should
quit your big new busy job.
267
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:19,693
Anyway, uh, just here
to pick up my takeaway.
268
00:14:19,693 --> 00:14:21,945
I bought lunch for my whole staff.
269
00:14:21,945 --> 00:14:24,072
Apart from the trainers, 'cause
they eat like cows. [CHUCKLES]
270
00:14:25,449 --> 00:14:26,460
Sorry, that sounds, um...
271
00:14:26,461 --> 00:14:28,160
No, they're love... I
mean, they're lovely people.
272
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,953
They're just vegetarians. [CHUCKLES]
273
00:14:34,208 --> 00:14:35,751
No way.
274
00:14:36,502 --> 00:14:41,465
Look who's here. No
fucking way! [LAUGHS]
275
00:14:41,465 --> 00:14:42,674
Do you know who this is?
276
00:14:42,674 --> 00:14:43,842
Mmm. Jason Jelly.
277
00:14:43,842 --> 00:14:45,886
- [MANAGER] That's right.
- No, "Nathan Shelley."
278
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:47,888
- Mmm.
- That's right, Nathan Shelley,
279
00:14:47,888 --> 00:14:50,891
manager of West Ham
United, in my restaurant!
280
00:14:50,891 --> 00:14:53,769
- [LAUGHS] Big week, my guy.
- Yep.
281
00:14:53,769 --> 00:14:57,814
Big fucking week. [INHALES SHARPLY]
I'm Derek. I'm the manager here.
282
00:14:57,814 --> 00:15:00,359
[CLEARS THROAT] Anything
you need, you got it.
283
00:15:01,026 --> 00:15:03,987
- Okay.
- From one manager to another. [CHUCKLES]
284
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:05,864
Yeah, well, it's not...
not quite the same, but...
285
00:15:05,864 --> 00:15:08,492
[CHUCKLES] Facing your team this week.
286
00:15:08,492 --> 00:15:11,286
- [HUFFS] That's gotta be hard-core, right?
- Mmm.
287
00:15:11,286 --> 00:15:13,830
I mean, you talked a lot of shit
about them in the press. [CHUCKLES]
288
00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:17,793
- Didn't ya? I loved it. [CHUCKLES]
- Sorry, can I, um... can I pay?
289
00:15:17,793 --> 00:15:19,490
[STAMMERS] No. No. No, no, no, no.
290
00:15:19,491 --> 00:15:23,793
This is on me, okay? On me. Understand?
291
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:27,636
This man's money is
no good here. [LAUGHS]
292
00:15:27,636 --> 00:15:31,181
Never charge. Except for
booze. Gotta charge for booze.
293
00:15:31,181 --> 00:15:32,891
I didn't order any booze. It's 12:30.
294
00:15:32,891 --> 00:15:36,103
[LAUGHS] Knock 'em dead.
295
00:15:36,103 --> 00:15:40,274
- Mmm.
- Go Hammers! [CHUCKLING]
296
00:15:40,274 --> 00:15:41,358
No way.
297
00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:45,070
Oi, oi, oi. Do you know
who this is? [CHUCKLES]
298
00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:50,784
All right, okay. Bye.
299
00:16:05,549 --> 00:16:06,592
[SHANDY] And cut!
300
00:16:06,592 --> 00:16:08,552
Lovely, Colin. Thank you.
301
00:16:08,552 --> 00:16:11,346
All right. [INHALES DEEPLY]
Okay, Dani, you're up.
302
00:16:11,346 --> 00:16:13,849
- [CHATTERING]
- I'm very nervous.
303
00:16:13,849 --> 00:16:15,726
Oh, no, no. Don't be
nervous. Look, just sit here.
304
00:16:15,726 --> 00:16:16,852
- Mm-hmm.
- Look into the camera
305
00:16:16,852 --> 00:16:18,854
and pretend you're
talking to an old friend.
306
00:16:18,854 --> 00:16:20,189
My oldest friend is Javiar.
307
00:16:20,189 --> 00:16:22,691
Great. How long have you known Javiar?
308
00:16:22,691 --> 00:16:26,278
Only a couple of months, but he
turns 108 years old next week.
309
00:16:27,738 --> 00:16:29,615
- Perfect.
- [CHUCKLES] Yeah.
310
00:16:30,699 --> 00:16:31,825
Final checks.
311
00:16:33,702 --> 00:16:34,703
Thank you.
312
00:16:36,914 --> 00:16:38,123
- [CREW MEMBER] Hello, Keeley.
- Hi.
313
00:16:38,123 --> 00:16:41,919
Yeah. Just scoot to
your left a little bit.
314
00:16:41,919 --> 00:16:45,172
Yeah, that's it. Okay, off you go, Dani.
315
00:16:45,756 --> 00:16:46,800
You may not know who I am,
316
00:16:46,801 --> 00:16:51,803
but I think the most beautiful
parts of a woman are her flaws.
317
00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:55,807
- Hmm.
- And cut! Thank you, Dani. Next!
318
00:16:55,807 --> 00:16:56,892
Okay.
319
00:16:57,434 --> 00:17:00,771
- [GASPS, SCREAMS]
- [EXCLAIMS, LAUGHS]
320
00:17:00,771 --> 00:17:02,689
- Brought you coffee.
- Yeah.
321
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:04,900
- How's it going?
- Oh, my God. This is great.
322
00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:06,234
- Yeah?
- They're great.
323
00:17:06,234 --> 00:17:08,529
I just... I love being the boss.
324
00:17:08,529 --> 00:17:10,614
- Cheers to that. Yeah.
- Cheers to that.
325
00:17:10,614 --> 00:17:11,990
Uh, you ready, Zoreaux?
326
00:17:11,990 --> 00:17:14,660
Oh, uh, yeah, but I actually
go by "Van Damme" now.
327
00:17:15,285 --> 00:17:17,704
Okay, great. Action, Van Damme.
328
00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:20,665
You don't know who I am,
329
00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:23,377
but I'm looking for someone who
likes short walks on the beach,
330
00:17:23,377 --> 00:17:26,964
so we can spend more time, you know...
331
00:17:27,506 --> 00:17:29,508
[SNICKERING]
332
00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:33,720
And cut.
333
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:36,515
Great, thanks, Van Damme. Next!
334
00:17:36,515 --> 00:17:37,975
[CHATTERING]
335
00:17:37,975 --> 00:17:40,018
- Van Damme?
- Yeah. It's my new name.
336
00:17:40,018 --> 00:17:42,229
Oh, cool. Why?
337
00:17:42,813 --> 00:17:44,106
Because I love Jean-Claude Van Damme,
338
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:46,149
and Zava told me I should
be whoever I wanna be.
339
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:49,611
- Okay, yeah. Cool.
- All right, Van Damme.
340
00:17:49,611 --> 00:17:51,321
- All right, boys.
- Take it easy.
341
00:17:52,656 --> 00:17:55,117
- [SHANDY] He's so fucking hot.
- [CHUCKLES]
342
00:17:55,117 --> 00:17:56,493
What's his story?
343
00:17:56,493 --> 00:17:58,954
Jamie? Oh, he's so cocky.
344
00:18:00,414 --> 00:18:02,374
But I guess you have
to be at this level.
345
00:18:03,333 --> 00:18:04,751
But he only thinks about himself.
346
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:07,045
[SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]
347
00:18:07,045 --> 00:18:08,505
At least, he used to.
348
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:11,049
[JAMIE] Joking. No.
[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
349
00:18:11,049 --> 00:18:14,469
But he's not accountable for his
actions and what they do to others.
350
00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:15,554
[SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]
351
00:18:15,554 --> 00:18:19,391
Except he is getting
better at making apologies.
352
00:18:21,435 --> 00:18:23,687
Still, he only thinks with his dick.
353
00:18:25,189 --> 00:18:29,109
And yet, I don't think
he's seen anyone in ages.
354
00:18:29,943 --> 00:18:33,655
[INHALES DEEPLY] I just wanna
know if I can bang him, babe.
355
00:18:35,365 --> 00:18:39,036
Oh. [CHUCKLES] I don't know.
356
00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:41,580
You should probably ask him,
it's his dick. [CHUCKLES]
357
00:18:41,580 --> 00:18:43,916
Cool. Off you go, Jamie.
358
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,212
[ENGINE REVS]
359
00:18:48,212 --> 00:18:50,547
[CHATTERING]
360
00:18:51,924 --> 00:18:53,842
Oh, what are y'all still doing here?
361
00:18:53,842 --> 00:18:55,844
Coach, you're gonna
wanna watch this. [SIGHS]
362
00:18:55,844 --> 00:18:57,137
Ooh, is it one of them videos
363
00:18:57,137 --> 00:18:59,306
of a military parent coming
home after a long tour?
364
00:18:59,306 --> 00:19:01,600
'Cause if so, I'm gonna be
eating tears and snot for dinner.
365
00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:03,310
- Not quite.
- Hmm.
366
00:19:24,665 --> 00:19:25,999
[ROY CHUCKLES]
367
00:19:25,999 --> 00:19:27,668
[CHUCKLES]
368
00:19:40,138 --> 00:19:41,138
[COACH BEARD SIGHS]
369
00:19:45,894 --> 00:19:46,895
[ROY] Here we go.
370
00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:49,356
[TED GROANS]
371
00:19:52,484 --> 00:19:53,484
[GROANS]
372
00:19:55,153 --> 00:19:56,738
Where'd this come from?
373
00:19:56,738 --> 00:19:59,366
This fucking legend thought
to pull the security footage
374
00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:00,868
when we told him about the sign.
375
00:20:00,868 --> 00:20:02,661
I guess you can take
the boy out of journalism
376
00:20:02,661 --> 00:20:04,329
but you can't take
journalism out of the boy.
377
00:20:04,329 --> 00:20:06,373
Right, you fucking ruined
it now. The point is,
378
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,876
the answer we were
looking for has arrived.
379
00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:10,627
What are you talking about?
380
00:20:10,627 --> 00:20:14,047
A video like this could
motivate a team, perhaps.
381
00:20:14,673 --> 00:20:15,716
Mm-hmm.
382
00:20:17,718 --> 00:20:19,011
Thank you for your help, Trent.
383
00:20:19,511 --> 00:20:21,805
May a young Robert Redford
portray you in a film someday.
384
00:20:22,389 --> 00:20:23,599
- Probably Dustin Hoffman.
- Mm-hmm.
385
00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:24,850
- [CHUCKLES] Good night.
- Good night.
386
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:28,270
Go home, guys. Get some sleep.
387
00:20:29,605 --> 00:20:30,814
- Okay.
- [TED] Mm-hmm.
388
00:20:30,814 --> 00:20:32,566
- Good night, Ted. Night, Beard.
- Good night.
389
00:20:32,566 --> 00:20:33,650
Night, Coach.
390
00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:37,237
[SIGHS]
391
00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:42,868
- Uh, Coach.
- Mmm.
392
00:20:42,868 --> 00:20:46,038
I was thinking about
your Sassy situation.
393
00:20:46,038 --> 00:20:47,164
Oh, yeah.
394
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:49,124
Jane's sister is in town.
395
00:20:49,124 --> 00:20:51,210
- No, thank you, Coach.
- That's the right answer.
396
00:20:55,631 --> 00:20:56,632
[DOOR CLOSES]
397
00:21:10,896 --> 00:21:13,106
Burning the midnight oil, I see.
398
00:21:14,191 --> 00:21:17,361
Uh, yeah. Sorry for the smell.
[CHUCKLES]
399
00:21:18,779 --> 00:21:20,489
The oil burning. [STAMMERS]
400
00:21:20,489 --> 00:21:22,533
Oh. [CHUCKLES]
401
00:21:22,533 --> 00:21:25,452
So, you're feeling
confident about this weekend?
402
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:28,705
Yeah. Yeah, no, I think so. Um...
403
00:21:30,832 --> 00:21:33,210
Yeah, no. Go... Yeah. We're
gonna destroy, right? [CHUCKLES]
404
00:21:34,002 --> 00:21:35,212
Good.
405
00:21:35,212 --> 00:21:37,422
No, it's j... Um... It's just, I...
406
00:21:39,675 --> 00:21:41,885
I just haven't seen Ted
since I left and, uh...
407
00:21:43,887 --> 00:21:46,014
We didn't leave on the
best of terms and...
408
00:21:47,766 --> 00:21:50,018
I feel like I owe him
an apology or something.
409
00:21:50,018 --> 00:21:52,312
You did what was best for you.
410
00:21:52,896 --> 00:21:54,314
What were you meant to do?
411
00:21:54,314 --> 00:21:57,025
Hang around, supporting Ted
for the rest of your life?
412
00:21:57,025 --> 00:21:58,610
I don't think so.
413
00:22:01,238 --> 00:22:02,239
[CHUCKLES]
414
00:22:05,117 --> 00:22:07,911
You've done nothing wrong,
Nathan, I promise you.
415
00:22:09,872 --> 00:22:11,540
You earned this job.
416
00:22:14,585 --> 00:22:16,545
Well, so what do I say when I see him?
417
00:22:16,545 --> 00:22:19,756
[CHUCKLES] You say
nothing, apart from "hello."
418
00:22:21,091 --> 00:22:23,510
You look him in the
eye. You shake his hand.
419
00:22:25,053 --> 00:22:26,763
And then you beat him.
420
00:22:29,183 --> 00:22:30,851
And then we go and celebrate.
421
00:22:30,851 --> 00:22:33,187
[SCOFFS] Okay.
422
00:22:33,854 --> 00:22:34,854
Good night, Nathan.
423
00:22:37,900 --> 00:22:40,986
Good night, Rupert. Thank you.
424
00:22:42,446 --> 00:22:43,572
Mr. Mannion.
425
00:23:26,490 --> 00:23:27,491
[SCOFFS]
426
00:23:33,705 --> 00:23:34,706
Hey.
427
00:23:35,374 --> 00:23:37,042
Working late? Or hardly working?
428
00:23:37,042 --> 00:23:39,294
Well, I don't think that's
how the joke goes. [CHUCKLES]
429
00:23:39,294 --> 00:23:40,504
What joke?
430
00:23:41,588 --> 00:23:42,798
Never mind. What's up?
431
00:23:43,549 --> 00:23:44,550
[SIGHS]
432
00:23:46,051 --> 00:23:47,636
I really want to win this one.
433
00:23:48,929 --> 00:23:50,013
I know.
434
00:23:57,354 --> 00:23:58,522
Everything okay?
435
00:24:04,987 --> 00:24:06,238
Am I a mess?
436
00:24:06,238 --> 00:24:07,823
Of course you are.
That's why we get along.
437
00:24:07,823 --> 00:24:09,408
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
438
00:24:11,326 --> 00:24:16,373
And I wish I could tell you to
ignore Sass, but she's usually right.
439
00:24:17,124 --> 00:24:19,815
[CLICKS TONGUE] So, Sassy
already told you about the...
440
00:24:19,816 --> 00:24:20,919
Of course. Girl talk.
441
00:24:21,587 --> 00:24:22,588
Girl talk.
442
00:24:22,588 --> 00:24:25,674
Mm-hmm. [SIGHS] Hmm.
443
00:24:25,674 --> 00:24:28,218
So, is everything all right?
444
00:24:30,012 --> 00:24:31,013
Yeah, I'm good.
445
00:24:31,013 --> 00:24:32,139
Oklahoma?
446
00:24:37,311 --> 00:24:38,312
[GRUNTS]
447
00:24:40,314 --> 00:24:41,982
I'm a work in "progmess."
448
00:24:45,402 --> 00:24:47,487
[CHUCKLES]
449
00:24:48,071 --> 00:24:49,072
Good night, Ted.
450
00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:54,328
You already won, you know?
451
00:24:56,914 --> 00:24:58,457
You got that turkey out of your life.
452
00:25:00,709 --> 00:25:01,710
[SIGHS]
453
00:25:02,878 --> 00:25:03,879
Beat them.
454
00:25:07,216 --> 00:25:08,300
Good night, boss.
455
00:25:16,642 --> 00:25:17,726
[SIGHS]
456
00:25:18,769 --> 00:25:20,521
[CROWD CHATTERING]
457
00:25:25,234 --> 00:25:27,945
- [CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING]
- [REPORTERS CLAMORING]
458
00:25:45,295 --> 00:25:47,297
[REPORTERS] Oh!
459
00:25:49,091 --> 00:25:51,093
[REPORTERS CHEERING]
460
00:25:54,930 --> 00:25:56,890
Oi, do I look all right?
461
00:25:56,890 --> 00:25:58,600
Of course you do. Why?
462
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:00,018
Well, if Jack actually shows up,
463
00:26:00,018 --> 00:26:03,272
I want him to think that I
look mysterious and powerful.
464
00:26:03,272 --> 00:26:04,690
Dynamic, you know?
465
00:26:04,690 --> 00:26:09,570
- All of that.
- You are mysterious, powerful and dynamic.
466
00:26:11,321 --> 00:26:14,157
Ooh. Shit, I'm nervous.
467
00:26:15,826 --> 00:26:17,828
I think I need to go
and reapply my lip liner.
468
00:26:19,955 --> 00:26:21,790
- I'll see you upstairs in the suite.
- Yep.
469
00:26:24,126 --> 00:26:25,294
[REBECCA CHUCKLES]
470
00:26:25,294 --> 00:26:27,045
Hey, Rebecca!
471
00:26:27,045 --> 00:26:29,590
- Rupert.
- Wonderful to see you.
472
00:26:30,382 --> 00:26:33,218
- Bex. Love the new hair.
- Hi.
473
00:26:33,802 --> 00:26:35,012
I haven't changed my hair.
474
00:26:35,012 --> 00:26:37,139
Nor should you. It's perfection.
475
00:26:37,139 --> 00:26:38,557
[CHUCKLES]
476
00:26:38,557 --> 00:26:40,142
So, how's the little one?
477
00:26:40,142 --> 00:26:44,271
Oh, yeah, Diane. She's already
walking. Can you believe that?
478
00:26:44,271 --> 00:26:47,191
Yeah. Drooling and
pooing around the house.
479
00:26:47,191 --> 00:26:48,901
[CHUCKLES] Takes after her father.
480
00:26:49,776 --> 00:26:54,114
- [LAUGHING]
- Well. Hey, take it easy on us today.
481
00:26:54,114 --> 00:26:56,366
Aah. No promises.
482
00:26:59,578 --> 00:27:01,079
[SIGHS]
483
00:27:03,665 --> 00:27:05,125
[SIGHS]
484
00:27:08,253 --> 00:27:12,132
[GASPS] Oh, shit. [SIGHS]
485
00:27:21,391 --> 00:27:22,476
Excuse me.
486
00:27:22,476 --> 00:27:24,978
I've got a bit of a situation here.
487
00:27:28,649 --> 00:27:31,818
Oh, thank you. But
it's actually not that.
488
00:27:34,530 --> 00:27:36,532
[GASPS] You're a lifesaver!
489
00:27:36,532 --> 00:27:39,284
- [CHUCKLES]
- Usually I'm like clockwork,
490
00:27:39,284 --> 00:27:42,037
but because I've been so
stressed, I've come on early.
491
00:27:43,455 --> 00:27:46,375
Oh, I'm so happy that it's
a super and not a skinny.
492
00:27:46,375 --> 00:27:48,126
Who are those even for?
493
00:27:48,126 --> 00:27:49,676
It's not like my vagina is on a diet,
494
00:27:49,677 --> 00:27:52,256
I'm on my fucking period. [CHUCKLES]
495
00:27:52,256 --> 00:27:53,257
[TOILET FLUSHES]
496
00:27:53,257 --> 00:27:54,883
Oi, thanks for helping me.
497
00:27:54,883 --> 00:27:56,385
And I love your shoes!
498
00:27:56,385 --> 00:27:58,053
Ah, yeah. [CHUCKLES] Thanks.
499
00:27:58,053 --> 00:28:00,681
- Pay it forward.
- Yeah.
500
00:28:00,681 --> 00:28:01,765
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
501
00:28:05,894 --> 00:28:08,313
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! Sorry.
502
00:28:08,313 --> 00:28:09,398
Excuse me.
503
00:28:11,775 --> 00:28:12,776
Hi.
504
00:28:14,778 --> 00:28:16,530
- Boy, you're tall.
- [CHUCKLES]
505
00:28:16,530 --> 00:28:19,032
Is your dad a tree or
something? [CHUCKLES]
506
00:28:19,032 --> 00:28:21,535
No, I'm screwing around. [SIGHS]
507
00:28:21,535 --> 00:28:23,787
Hey, speaking of trees, who
are y'all rooting for today?
508
00:28:23,787 --> 00:28:24,913
[ALL] West Ham.
509
00:28:25,414 --> 00:28:28,000
- Yeah, no, that makes sense. Yeah.
- [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
510
00:28:33,338 --> 00:28:36,300
Go ahead. Yeah. Going
down one more floor.
511
00:28:36,300 --> 00:28:38,552
- Thank you.
- Yeah, of course.
512
00:28:39,928 --> 00:28:41,096
Best of luck out there.
513
00:28:57,571 --> 00:28:59,156
Hey, Nate. That you?
514
00:29:00,490 --> 00:29:02,659
Oh. Hi. I didn't see you there.
515
00:29:02,659 --> 00:29:05,954
- Oh, that's okay. How you been, man?
- Yeah, okay.
516
00:29:06,455 --> 00:29:08,457
Yeah. Good. Good.
517
00:29:09,499 --> 00:29:11,210
- [CHUCKLES]
- [SIGHS]
518
00:29:14,296 --> 00:29:15,297
Listen, Ted.
519
00:29:16,298 --> 00:29:18,550
- I... I just wanna say that...
- [ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
520
00:29:18,550 --> 00:29:19,676
... the way I left...
521
00:29:19,676 --> 00:29:22,971
Nathan. There you are.
522
00:29:24,264 --> 00:29:25,265
Yeah.
523
00:29:31,939 --> 00:29:33,398
Hey, Rupert.
524
00:29:34,107 --> 00:29:36,485
- Ted.
- Nice to see you again.
525
00:29:37,152 --> 00:29:38,946
[CHUCKLES] Good luck.
526
00:29:41,907 --> 00:29:42,950
[DOOR CLOSES]
527
00:29:44,117 --> 00:29:46,828
- [BARBARA] Keeley? Yeah. [LAUGHS]
- [REBECCA] She's absolutely fantastic.
528
00:29:46,828 --> 00:29:48,997
- Oh, here she is now.
- [REBECCA] Ah.
529
00:29:48,997 --> 00:29:52,584
- Hey. Hey. Yeah.
- Um, Keeley? This is Jack Danvers.
530
00:29:52,584 --> 00:29:53,794
Hello.
531
00:29:55,003 --> 00:29:57,130
I believe you have something of mine.
532
00:29:59,383 --> 00:30:01,677
Oh, fuck. You're Jack?
533
00:30:01,677 --> 00:30:02,970
[CHUCKLES]
534
00:30:02,970 --> 00:30:05,055
Ooh, this is a bit embarrassing.
535
00:30:05,055 --> 00:30:07,891
- No.
- Yeah. We all thought you were a man.
536
00:30:07,891 --> 00:30:09,768
Yeah, that too. [CHUCKLES]
537
00:30:09,768 --> 00:30:11,478
Oh, it's like that old riddle.
538
00:30:11,478 --> 00:30:13,939
- What riddle?
- You know, always a tricky one, this one.
539
00:30:13,939 --> 00:30:15,566
A father and son are in a car wreck.
540
00:30:15,566 --> 00:30:19,403
Dad dies instantly, the son
is rushed to an emergency room.
541
00:30:19,403 --> 00:30:21,446
A surgeon walks in and says,
542
00:30:21,446 --> 00:30:24,241
"I can't operate on
this boy. He's my son."
543
00:30:24,241 --> 00:30:25,784
[WHISPERS] How is it possible?
544
00:30:25,784 --> 00:30:28,120
- [GASPS] Because she's a woman.
- She's gay.
545
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:30,163
- Sperm donor.
- He lives in a simulation?
546
00:30:30,831 --> 00:30:33,709
Right. Yeah, I guess
that's a bit dated now.
547
00:30:34,293 --> 00:30:37,588
Um, so, I assume "Jack" is
short for "Jacqueline," right?
548
00:30:37,588 --> 00:30:39,506
No. It's short for my
father wanted a boy.
549
00:30:40,465 --> 00:30:41,550
[SHANDY CHUCKLES]
550
00:30:41,550 --> 00:30:45,721
I'm gonna go and sit
down now, outside. Now.
551
00:30:45,721 --> 00:30:48,015
[CHUCKLES] Jack, welcome.
552
00:30:48,015 --> 00:30:50,601
We are not allowed to
take drinks to our seats.
553
00:30:50,601 --> 00:30:52,978
So if you want to get plastered,
we should probably do that now.
554
00:30:52,978 --> 00:30:55,272
- Mmm. Okay.
- [LAUGHING]
555
00:30:55,856 --> 00:30:57,566
Well, after you.
556
00:30:57,566 --> 00:31:00,277
[BARBARA CONTINUES LAUGHING]
557
00:31:00,277 --> 00:31:03,071
Ah, you're so funny, Rebecca. [CHUCKLES]
558
00:31:04,114 --> 00:31:07,242
[EXHALES HEAVILY] Barbara's
obsessed with Rebecca.
559
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:11,330
I hope she doesn't try and kill
her and wear her skin as a suit.
560
00:31:15,918 --> 00:31:17,252
What the fuck?
561
00:31:17,252 --> 00:31:19,713
- Cheers. It's gonna be a good day.
- [DOOR BELL JINGLES]
562
00:31:19,713 --> 00:31:21,757
- All right, Baz.
- Oi!
563
00:31:21,757 --> 00:31:22,841
[DOOR BELL JINGLES]
564
00:31:22,841 --> 00:31:25,093
This is a Richmond pub.
565
00:31:26,178 --> 00:31:27,804
It's all right, Mae. He's with me.
566
00:31:32,643 --> 00:31:34,228
Get the fuck out!
567
00:31:36,605 --> 00:31:38,607
[ALL LAUGHING]
568
00:31:39,525 --> 00:31:40,859
[PATRON] Come on, Richmond!
569
00:31:40,859 --> 00:31:43,612
[ALL] Come on, Richmond!
Come on, Richmond!
570
00:31:43,612 --> 00:31:45,447
[ARLO] It's a full
house for today's battle
571
00:31:45,447 --> 00:31:49,451
between West Ham United
and Zava's AFC Richmond.
572
00:31:49,451 --> 00:31:53,121
A win would take either team
to the top spot in the table,
573
00:31:53,121 --> 00:31:56,250
knocking mighty Manchester
City off number one.
574
00:31:56,792 --> 00:31:58,961
Should be a tight match,
Chris. Any predictions?
575
00:31:58,961 --> 00:32:00,838
I stopped making predictions, Arlo.
576
00:32:00,838 --> 00:32:02,256
Because I was never wrong.
577
00:32:02,256 --> 00:32:05,592
Got to the point I was worried I
was the one making things happen.
578
00:32:05,592 --> 00:32:07,010
Well, that's interesting.
579
00:32:07,010 --> 00:32:08,178
I knew you'd say that.
580
00:32:08,178 --> 00:32:10,681
[CROWD SINGING] ♪ They fade and die ♪
581
00:32:10,681 --> 00:32:14,768
♪ Fortune's always hiding ♪
582
00:32:14,768 --> 00:32:18,522
♪ I've looked everywhere ♪
583
00:32:18,522 --> 00:32:22,442
♪ I'm forever blowing bubbles ♪
584
00:32:22,442 --> 00:32:26,405
♪ Pretty bubbles in the air ♪
585
00:32:26,405 --> 00:32:34,997
United! United!
586
00:32:34,997 --> 00:32:36,081
[CROWD CHEERING]
587
00:32:36,081 --> 00:32:37,374
Uh, Nate.
588
00:32:37,374 --> 00:32:39,209
[CHEERING CONTINUES]
589
00:32:39,209 --> 00:32:41,670
Let's have fun out there
today, yeah? [CHUCKLES]
590
00:32:56,602 --> 00:32:58,312
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
591
00:33:06,695 --> 00:33:09,156
[ARLO] West Ham are quite happy
to just soak up the pressure.
592
00:33:09,156 --> 00:33:12,659
Not taking any risks at
all against Richmond,
593
00:33:12,659 --> 00:33:14,661
of all teams, at home.
594
00:33:15,412 --> 00:33:18,874
- A sign of how far Richmond have come.
- It's all right. We're okay.
595
00:33:18,874 --> 00:33:20,459
[CHRIS] What a threat Zava is.
596
00:33:20,459 --> 00:33:21,950
Richmond! To the right,
to the right, to the right!
597
00:33:21,951 --> 00:33:23,837
Tight! Don't get scared.
598
00:33:27,716 --> 00:33:29,635
- [THIERRY GRUNTS] -
[ARLO] And it stays nil-nil,
599
00:33:29,635 --> 00:33:32,012
thanks to an amazing save by Zoreaux.
600
00:33:32,012 --> 00:33:34,223
- Van Damme. Van Damme.
- [COACH BEARD, ROY] Van Damme!
601
00:33:34,223 --> 00:33:36,183
I hear he wants to be
called "Van Damme" now.
602
00:33:36,183 --> 00:33:37,100
Why?*
603
00:33:37,100 --> 00:33:39,686
Well, we'd probably have to dive
into his childhood for that answer.
604
00:33:39,686 --> 00:33:40,854
[CROWD CHEERING]
605
00:33:40,854 --> 00:33:44,650
[ARLO] Richmond need the key pass
to unlock the Hammers' defense.
606
00:33:44,650 --> 00:33:45,734
That could be the one.
607
00:33:47,402 --> 00:33:48,946
- Tartt hits the woodwork.
- No!
608
00:33:48,946 --> 00:33:51,031
- That was close.
- Zava was wide open.
609
00:33:54,284 --> 00:33:55,953
For Zava!
610
00:33:56,828 --> 00:33:58,400
[ARLO] There'll be two more minutes
611
00:33:58,401 --> 00:34:00,721
in the first half of this scoreless,
612
00:34:00,791 --> 00:34:02,918
but pulsating, London derby.
613
00:34:04,586 --> 00:34:07,464
- Obisanya caught in possession.
- No. No, no, no.
614
00:34:07,464 --> 00:34:09,675
[ARLO] And here come
West Ham on the break.
615
00:34:10,467 --> 00:34:12,386
Armando bearing down on goal.
616
00:34:13,387 --> 00:34:14,388
[GRUNTS]
617
00:34:14,388 --> 00:34:15,639
- [WEST HAM FANS] Yeah!
- Yes!
618
00:34:15,639 --> 00:34:18,266
[ARLO] And it's there.
Right under Van Damme.
619
00:34:18,266 --> 00:34:21,228
The Canadian keeper
apparently not as unstoppable
620
00:34:21,228 --> 00:34:23,105
as the Muscles from Brussels.
621
00:34:23,105 --> 00:34:25,983
[CHRIS] That's not
fair, Arlo. Nobody is.
622
00:34:25,983 --> 00:34:27,943
- We've been here before. Come on.
- Come on, lads.
623
00:34:27,943 --> 00:34:31,487
[ARLO] The Hammers go up
1-nil just before halftime.
624
00:34:32,072 --> 00:34:34,032
Fuck it.
625
00:34:34,032 --> 00:34:37,077
All right, guys. Come on, now.
Let's end this half strong!
626
00:34:38,328 --> 00:34:39,621
Huddle. [WHISTLES]
627
00:34:42,623 --> 00:34:43,958
What's this shit?
628
00:34:45,043 --> 00:34:46,128
- [TED] Hmm.
- I don't know.
629
00:34:46,128 --> 00:34:48,880
- Lower. Lower. Move it right. Five.
- Brilliant. Brilliant.
630
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:51,257
- Right now, come on. Five.
- Ref, just blow the fucking whistle.
631
00:34:52,885 --> 00:34:53,886
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
632
00:34:55,429 --> 00:34:56,554
[ARLO] West Ham pressing now.
633
00:34:56,554 --> 00:34:58,515
- No, no.
- [ARLO] A new tactic from the Hammers
634
00:34:58,515 --> 00:35:00,642
in the closing seconds
of the first half.
635
00:35:00,642 --> 00:35:02,561
[CHRIS] It's never too
late to change, Arlo.
636
00:35:04,938 --> 00:35:07,816
- [THIERRY] No!
- Fuck! Fuck you! Fuck!
637
00:35:07,816 --> 00:35:11,028
[ARLO] And it's 2-nil. Oh, deary me.
638
00:35:15,616 --> 00:35:16,617
Excuse me.
639
00:35:20,829 --> 00:35:22,206
How did that happen?
640
00:35:23,415 --> 00:35:25,542
- [WHISTLE BLOWS]
- [ARLO] We go to halftime.
641
00:35:25,542 --> 00:35:27,586
Richmond have dominated possession,
642
00:35:27,586 --> 00:35:31,757
but out of absolutely nowhere,
it's 2-nil to the Hammers.
643
00:35:31,757 --> 00:35:33,634
[BAR PATRON] We don't deserve that.
644
00:35:33,634 --> 00:35:35,552
- What the fuck just happened?
- [SIGHS]
645
00:35:35,552 --> 00:35:36,803
I... I d... I don't know.
646
00:35:39,681 --> 00:35:41,475
Hey, fellas. Uh, I'll
be right back. Okay?
647
00:35:41,475 --> 00:35:42,768
The fuck are you going?
648
00:35:42,768 --> 00:35:45,729
- I'll just be a minute or two, okay?
- What do we t-tell... tell the team?
649
00:35:45,729 --> 00:35:47,481
I don't know. Surprise me. [CHUCKLES]
650
00:35:47,481 --> 00:35:48,565
[STAMMERS]
651
00:35:53,195 --> 00:35:55,489
Hey, boss. What you doing down here?
652
00:35:55,489 --> 00:35:58,659
I just wanted to tell you
that I believe in you, Ted.
653
00:35:58,659 --> 00:35:59,826
Uh-huh?
654
00:35:59,826 --> 00:36:02,955
And I know that I've been putting
an awful lot of pressure on you
655
00:36:02,955 --> 00:36:07,793
to win today, but I just... just
want you to forget all about that.
656
00:36:07,793 --> 00:36:11,588
Just... [INHALES SHARPLY]
... be yourself and have fun.
657
00:36:13,048 --> 00:36:14,049
- Okay.
- Yeah.
658
00:36:14,049 --> 00:36:16,009
Okay. Well, thank you.
659
00:36:17,803 --> 00:36:19,555
I believe in you, Ted.
660
00:36:20,931 --> 00:36:23,016
- And it's intense.
- [EXHALES SHARPLY]
661
00:36:24,268 --> 00:36:26,395
- I better go. All right.
- Off you pop. [CHUCKLES]
662
00:36:26,395 --> 00:36:28,063
[REBECCA BREATHES DEEPLY]
663
00:36:28,897 --> 00:36:34,319
Remember, have fun! Whoo-hoo!
664
00:36:34,319 --> 00:36:37,906
- Yes! This is so exciting!
- [EXHALES DEEPLY]
665
00:36:37,906 --> 00:36:39,199
Whoo-hoo!
666
00:36:39,199 --> 00:36:40,701
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
667
00:36:40,701 --> 00:36:43,287
[PLAYERS CHATTERING]
668
00:36:43,287 --> 00:36:44,413
No.
669
00:36:46,582 --> 00:36:48,584
[CLAMORING, SHOUTING]
670
00:36:52,838 --> 00:36:54,173
This is your surprise, huh?
671
00:36:54,715 --> 00:36:57,885
A minute ago, they were
catatonic. Now look at them.
672
00:36:59,761 --> 00:37:02,472
- They're killers.
- Frankly, Ted, sometimes that's good.
673
00:37:09,938 --> 00:37:14,193
- [CROWD CHEERING]
- [SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
674
00:37:18,989 --> 00:37:21,200
[ARLO] Oh, my. Richmond
coming out of the tunnel
675
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,452
with a palpable chip
on their shoulder.
676
00:37:24,036 --> 00:37:25,815
[CHRIS] Wow. A real
tension on the pitch.
677
00:37:25,816 --> 00:37:28,207
I think we're in for an exciting half.
678
00:37:28,207 --> 00:37:29,420
[ARLO] We begin the second half
679
00:37:29,421 --> 00:37:31,335
with Richmond looking
for a strong start.
680
00:37:31,335 --> 00:37:33,587
- Come on, boys. Fucking kill 'em.
- Fucking kill 'em.
681
00:37:33,587 --> 00:37:34,963
- Here we go. Here we go!
- Kill!
682
00:37:34,963 --> 00:37:35,963
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
683
00:37:37,758 --> 00:37:40,052
- [ARLO] Ooh. That's an awful tackle.
- [PATRONS] Oh.
684
00:37:40,052 --> 00:37:41,845
- He would be fortunate to escape...
- Oh, fuck.
685
00:37:41,845 --> 00:37:43,180
... with just a yellow.
686
00:37:43,180 --> 00:37:45,098
It's a deserved red, and Richmond
687
00:37:45,098 --> 00:37:48,393
will play almost the entire
second half with ten men.
688
00:37:49,686 --> 00:37:51,730
He's actually a very sweet young man.
689
00:37:53,273 --> 00:37:55,359
[ARLO] Here come West Ham. [GRUNTS]
690
00:37:55,359 --> 00:37:56,860
[PATRONS] Aw.
691
00:37:56,860 --> 00:37:58,362
[PATRONS CHATTERING]
692
00:37:58,362 --> 00:38:00,197
[ARLO] And now Van
Damme has been sent off.
693
00:38:00,197 --> 00:38:02,783
- We're playing like Italians.
- I know.
694
00:38:03,434 --> 00:38:04,451
It's awesome.
695
00:38:04,451 --> 00:38:05,827
[PLAYERS CLAMORING, GRUNTING]
696
00:38:07,329 --> 00:38:08,914
Oh, dear.
697
00:38:12,251 --> 00:38:13,669
- [WHISTLE BLOWS]
- [GROANS]
698
00:38:15,003 --> 00:38:16,964
[PLAYERS SHOUTING]
699
00:38:18,966 --> 00:38:19,967
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
700
00:38:20,592 --> 00:38:22,845
[ARLO] It's getting a
touch spicy out there.
701
00:38:22,845 --> 00:38:26,139
[CHRIS] Spicy, Arlo?
This is vintage vindaloo.
702
00:38:27,266 --> 00:38:28,475
[GRUNTS]
703
00:38:28,475 --> 00:38:29,475
No.
704
00:38:30,394 --> 00:38:31,394
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
705
00:38:32,980 --> 00:38:36,942
[ARGUING INDISTINCTLY]
706
00:38:37,943 --> 00:38:38,944
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
707
00:38:41,196 --> 00:38:43,140
[ARLO] Oh, Montlaur has lost his mind,
708
00:38:43,141 --> 00:38:45,784
and Richmond have lost a third player.
709
00:38:45,784 --> 00:38:46,827
[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
710
00:38:46,827 --> 00:38:48,662
Om.
711
00:38:48,662 --> 00:38:50,497
[SHOUTING CONTINUES]
712
00:38:53,584 --> 00:38:55,210
- Oof.
- [WHISTLE BLOWS]
713
00:38:55,210 --> 00:38:57,004
Fucking come on.
714
00:38:57,588 --> 00:39:00,591
[ARLO] Richmond have
completely lost the plot.
715
00:39:01,508 --> 00:39:05,137
Zava must be wondering what
he's done to deserve this.
716
00:39:09,224 --> 00:39:10,517
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
717
00:39:10,517 --> 00:39:12,060
- Yes!
- [CROWD CHEERS]
718
00:39:12,060 --> 00:39:14,104
[ARLO] And it's 4-1 to the Hammers.
719
00:39:14,104 --> 00:39:17,024
It went from evenly
matched to unevenly matched
720
00:39:17,024 --> 00:39:21,069
to light a match on fire and
put it into a can of petrol.
721
00:39:21,069 --> 00:39:23,488
[CHRIS] That second half should've
come with a trigger warning.
722
00:39:23,488 --> 00:39:27,826
[ARLO] One extraordinary goal by Zava
did not make it any less tough to watch.
723
00:39:27,826 --> 00:39:31,496
Richmond showed a side of
themselves we've never seen before.
724
00:39:31,496 --> 00:39:34,082
They played angry,
dirty and ugly.
725
00:39:34,082 --> 00:39:37,127
[CHRIS] Which are also the names
of Zava's three youngest kids.
726
00:39:37,753 --> 00:39:39,213
Shit.
727
00:39:41,798 --> 00:39:42,799
Shit.
728
00:39:44,092 --> 00:39:45,135
Shit.
729
00:39:45,135 --> 00:39:47,262
- [HIGGINS] Hey, it's okay.
- [REBECCA] Shit.
730
00:39:52,059 --> 00:39:53,310
Did you guys have fun?
731
00:39:53,310 --> 00:39:54,394
[STAMMERS] Yeah.
732
00:39:54,394 --> 00:39:57,439
The violence was quite entertaining,
wasn't it? [CHUCKLES] In a way.
733
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:01,401
[KEELEY CHUCKLES]
734
00:40:04,079 --> 00:40:05,113
[GROANS]
735
00:40:05,113 --> 00:40:07,324
Sending off Van Damme was a mistake.
736
00:40:08,033 --> 00:40:09,326
He played with passion.
737
00:40:10,536 --> 00:40:13,080
"Passion" is a word we use
when we talk about love.
738
00:40:14,706 --> 00:40:17,960
It is also a word we
use to describe a crime.
739
00:40:19,670 --> 00:40:21,213
Sometimes it is also a fruit.
740
00:40:25,759 --> 00:40:27,094
Oh, gosh. I'm so sorry.
741
00:40:30,430 --> 00:40:31,431
[RUPERT CHUCKLES]
742
00:40:32,140 --> 00:40:34,476
[DOOR CLICKS SHUT]
743
00:40:38,689 --> 00:40:39,690
[SIGHS]
744
00:40:40,649 --> 00:40:42,192
[SIGHS]
745
00:40:48,782 --> 00:40:51,368
- We fucked up.
- We overcorrected and played with hate.
746
00:40:51,368 --> 00:40:52,452
Mmm.
747
00:40:54,162 --> 00:40:56,957
- Be great if you yelled at us a bit.
- Please.
748
00:40:58,750 --> 00:41:01,170
- Call us pieces of shit or something.
- Now.
749
00:41:02,671 --> 00:41:03,881
You can hit us.
750
00:41:03,881 --> 00:41:05,132
Get it over with.
751
00:41:06,967 --> 00:41:09,011
Tried something new. It
didn't work. Big whoop.
752
00:41:11,388 --> 00:41:13,432
I will take that thumb
drive one of y'all's got.
753
00:41:19,730 --> 00:41:21,106
- [COACH BEARD SIGHS]
- [TED GRUNTS]
754
00:41:22,441 --> 00:41:25,319
Shake it off, fellas. Lot
of football left this season.
755
00:41:29,323 --> 00:41:31,491
- What a fucking arsehole.
- I know.
756
00:41:31,491 --> 00:41:33,436
[REPORTER] You have to feel
pretty good about yourself
757
00:41:33,437 --> 00:41:34,453
after that win, yeah?
758
00:41:34,453 --> 00:41:36,788
Well, yeah. Uh, Richmond
were clearly rattled.
759
00:41:36,788 --> 00:41:40,292
Um, it was easier than I
expected, if I'm honest. [CHUCKLES]
760
00:41:40,292 --> 00:41:41,376
[REPORTER] What about Ted?
761
00:41:41,376 --> 00:41:44,254
Quite a snub not to shake his
hand at the end of the game.
762
00:41:45,464 --> 00:41:48,842
Did I not? [STAMMERS]
I... I didn't mean to.
763
00:41:48,842 --> 00:41:52,554
I... Guess I just got caught
up in the excitement of it all.
764
00:41:52,554 --> 00:41:54,348
Yeah. [INHALES DEEPLY]
765
00:41:55,140 --> 00:41:56,183
Excuse me a minute. I just...
766
00:42:08,570 --> 00:42:11,323
Coach Shelley, Mr. Mannion
asked me to give you this.
767
00:42:13,158 --> 00:42:14,701
He'll meet you there in an hour.
768
00:42:16,203 --> 00:42:18,372
Oh. Thank...
769
00:42:36,390 --> 00:42:39,017
- It's so good to see you, Rebecca.
- You too, Bex.
770
00:42:39,017 --> 00:42:40,978
Oh, Rebecca, my dear.
771
00:42:40,978 --> 00:42:44,731
- So sorry for your loss.
- Thank you.
772
00:42:44,731 --> 00:42:47,150
Come on, old man. It's
way past your bedtime.
773
00:42:49,903 --> 00:42:50,904
[REBECCA CHUCKLES]
774
00:42:51,405 --> 00:42:53,115
Lovely to see you. [KISSES]
775
00:42:53,699 --> 00:42:55,284
I saw you with your assistant.
776
00:42:56,660 --> 00:42:58,912
Your daughter deserves
better, and so does Bex.
777
00:42:59,997 --> 00:43:01,248
Stop fucking around.
778
00:43:10,007 --> 00:43:11,842
- Here you go. [CHUCKLES]
- [CHUCKLES]
779
00:43:11,842 --> 00:43:15,012
[SIGHS] We are normally a lot
better than that. And nicer.
780
00:43:15,012 --> 00:43:17,604
Well, it's never great when your team
781
00:43:17,605 --> 00:43:19,808
gets more red cards than goals, is it?
782
00:43:19,808 --> 00:43:21,643
- No. [CHUCKLES]
- [JACK CHUCKLES]
783
00:43:21,643 --> 00:43:24,563
[SIGHS] What a shit show. [CHUCKLES]
784
00:43:25,856 --> 00:43:28,025
Anyway, good news. Bantr's trending.
785
00:43:28,025 --> 00:43:29,151
- It is?
- Yeah.
786
00:43:29,151 --> 00:43:32,154
Pretty sure the change
to the bio line helped.
787
00:43:32,696 --> 00:43:33,947
What are you talking about?
788
00:43:38,368 --> 00:43:39,620
Who did this?
789
00:43:39,620 --> 00:43:42,956
I did. This afternoon,
when I uploaded the vids.
790
00:43:42,956 --> 00:43:44,833
[CLICKS TONGUE] You're welcome.
791
00:43:46,335 --> 00:43:47,628
- Shandy.
- Yeah.
792
00:43:49,213 --> 00:43:53,634
This... This is the opposite
of what Bantr is trying to do.
793
00:43:53,634 --> 00:43:55,969
Are you joking? They're gonna love it.
794
00:43:55,969 --> 00:43:58,555
I've literally tripled
their subscribers in an hour.
795
00:43:58,555 --> 00:43:59,765
[JACK INHALES DEEPLY, SIGHS]
796
00:43:59,765 --> 00:44:03,227
You need to change
this back, now. Please.
797
00:44:04,394 --> 00:44:05,395
Yeah.
798
00:44:07,481 --> 00:44:09,441
It was really lovely to meet you.
799
00:44:10,192 --> 00:44:12,486
- You too.
- Excuse me.
800
00:44:18,283 --> 00:44:21,912
- [RUPERT] Hey. Here he is!
- [PATRONS CHEERING, APPLAUDING]
801
00:44:21,912 --> 00:44:24,456
[RUPERT] The Wonder Kid himself.
802
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:28,919
The man of the hour!
803
00:44:28,919 --> 00:44:31,380
Aw. [STAMMERS] Thank you
very much, Mr. Mannion.
804
00:44:31,380 --> 00:44:34,341
[GRUNTS] Please, no. "Rupert."
805
00:44:34,341 --> 00:44:36,510
- Oh.
- Nathan.
806
00:44:36,510 --> 00:44:39,221
Oh. Thanks, Ms. Kakes. That's...
807
00:44:39,221 --> 00:44:43,642
And, uh, Nathan, allow
me to introduce Anastasia.
808
00:44:45,185 --> 00:44:46,186
Huge fan.
809
00:44:49,439 --> 00:44:50,816
Oh, my God. You're famous.
810
00:44:50,816 --> 00:44:52,234
[CHUCKLES] So are you.
811
00:44:52,234 --> 00:44:53,944
[CHUCKLES]
812
00:44:57,990 --> 00:44:59,741
Congratulations to your victory.
813
00:45:00,450 --> 00:45:01,994
Oh, yeah. Thank you.
814
00:45:04,872 --> 00:45:05,873
Mmm.
815
00:45:07,040 --> 00:45:08,041
[CLEARS THROAT]
816
00:45:08,792 --> 00:45:10,460
[KNOCKING]
817
00:45:10,460 --> 00:45:12,504
Come on, Tartt! One more before dinner!
818
00:45:14,756 --> 00:45:17,467
[BREATHES HEAVILY]
Let's go, Coach. [PANTS]
819
00:45:22,973 --> 00:45:24,516
[GARY] That was hard to watch.
820
00:45:24,516 --> 00:45:26,154
Thierry, West Ham's domination today
821
00:45:26,155 --> 00:45:28,437
saw Ted Lasso being totally exposed
822
00:45:28,437 --> 00:45:30,522
by his former assistant Nate Shelley.
823
00:45:30,522 --> 00:45:33,942
[THIERRY] Gary, I love this quote
from a Chinese philosopher, Laozi,
824
00:45:33,942 --> 00:45:36,612
"When the student is ready,
the teacher will appear.
825
00:45:36,612 --> 00:45:40,157
When the student is truly ready,
the teacher will disappear."
826
00:45:40,157 --> 00:45:41,241
The Greyhounds...
827
00:46:01,303 --> 00:46:02,304
[GLASS THUDS ON TABLE]
828
00:46:03,597 --> 00:46:07,184
[COMPUTER LINE RINGING]
829
00:46:08,519 --> 00:46:10,854
[EXHALES DEEPLY, CLEARS THROAT]
830
00:46:10,854 --> 00:46:12,022
- [MICHELLE] Hi, Ted.
- Hey.
831
00:46:12,606 --> 00:46:13,649
Sorry about the match.
832
00:46:13,649 --> 00:46:16,151
No, no. That's all right. It
was a tough one. [CHUCKLES]
833
00:46:16,151 --> 00:46:18,320
Henry's not here right now.
He's at a birthday party,
834
00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:19,404
- but I'll...
- No, that's okay.
835
00:46:19,404 --> 00:46:22,035
I w... I was actually
hoping just to chat with you.
836
00:46:22,036 --> 00:46:23,036
You... You... You got a minute?
837
00:46:23,659 --> 00:46:25,744
Sure. Is everything okay?
838
00:46:25,744 --> 00:46:30,040
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh... Well, uh... No.
839
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:31,583
You know, I... I just, um...
840
00:46:33,001 --> 00:46:35,587
I wanted to say something
real quick. Um...
841
00:46:37,631 --> 00:46:39,216
[STAMMERS] Look, I, uh...
842
00:46:39,716 --> 00:46:44,054
I know that you and I aren't,
you know, together anymore.
843
00:46:44,596 --> 00:46:45,931
A-And... And I respect that.
844
00:46:45,931 --> 00:46:48,976
Okay? I... I do. Um...
845
00:46:52,938 --> 00:46:55,649
But, um... Well, uh, you know,
846
00:46:55,649 --> 00:46:59,152
this whole thing with you and
Dr. Jacob really ticks me off.
847
00:47:01,029 --> 00:47:04,324
And I'm upset that we didn't
ever really get to talk about it
848
00:47:04,324 --> 00:47:06,159
before it all started.
849
00:47:07,911 --> 00:47:08,912
Yeah.
850
00:47:08,912 --> 00:47:13,625
A-And l-look, I understand
that m-me saying all this,
851
00:47:13,625 --> 00:47:17,129
uh, might be the wrong
thing to do, but...
852
00:47:19,339 --> 00:47:22,926
I just feel like not saying it...
853
00:47:26,346 --> 00:47:28,056
i-i-isn't
the, um...
854
00:47:29,975 --> 00:47:31,602
Well, wouldn't be the
right thing either.
855
00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:37,774
'Cause we gotta raise this
little boy together, you know?
856
00:47:40,110 --> 00:47:42,571
We're stuck with each other.
We're gonna share grandkids.
857
00:47:42,571 --> 00:47:43,655
[CHUCKLES]
858
00:47:49,203 --> 00:47:50,787
I love you, Michelle.
859
00:47:53,624 --> 00:47:54,958
And I love Henry.
860
00:47:59,838 --> 00:48:01,548
And I love our family.
861
00:48:03,759 --> 00:48:05,177
No matter what it looks like.
862
00:48:12,184 --> 00:48:13,185
Okay?
863
00:48:16,230 --> 00:48:17,231
Of course.
864
00:48:21,818 --> 00:48:24,196
Well, uh, I'll talk to y'all soon.
865
00:48:25,155 --> 00:48:27,741
Have a good night. Tell...
Tell Henry I love him.
866
00:48:28,575 --> 00:48:29,618
Good night, Ted.
867
00:48:44,007 --> 00:48:45,342
[SIGHS]
868
00:48:55,000 --> 00:49:00,000
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