1 00:00:51,678 --> 00:00:54,598 - Morning. - Morning. Made you some coffee. 2 00:00:55,307 --> 00:00:56,766 I don't do caffeine. 3 00:00:57,486 --> 00:00:59,978 Right. Your body is a temple. 4 00:01:00,548 --> 00:01:04,134 Well, I don't know about that. More like a church in an airport. 5 00:01:07,881 --> 00:01:09,112 Big day for Richmond. 6 00:01:09,696 --> 00:01:11,576 Thought you didn't know anything about football. 7 00:01:11,822 --> 00:01:14,576 I don't. But I know who Zava is. 8 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:16,661 Of course. 9 00:01:17,454 --> 00:01:18,934 Text me when you get back from Dubai? 10 00:01:25,587 --> 00:01:28,632 - Safe flight. - Thanks. Safe driving. 11 00:01:50,737 --> 00:01:52,364 I am a strong and capable man. 12 00:02:00,872 --> 00:02:01,873 Bollocks. 13 00:02:38,201 --> 00:02:41,954 Okay. So obviously Zava's gonna be moving into our starting lineup. 14 00:02:41,955 --> 00:02:44,291 Which means, if my maths... 15 00:02:45,419 --> 00:02:46,709 are corrects, 16 00:02:46,710 --> 00:02:47,990 we're gonna have to sit someone. 17 00:02:48,420 --> 00:02:49,462 Who's it gonna be? 18 00:02:49,463 --> 00:02:50,921 Well, I think it's gotta be Colin. 19 00:02:50,922 --> 00:02:52,007 Ouch. 20 00:02:52,465 --> 00:02:55,134 Colin's a chameleon. He can change depending on a situation. 21 00:02:55,135 --> 00:02:58,137 Bigger issue is, you put Zava up front, 22 00:02:58,138 --> 00:03:00,472 either Jamie or Dani's gonna have to drop back to midfield. 23 00:03:00,473 --> 00:03:03,267 So, who do we think will take the news better? Dani or Jamie? 24 00:03:03,268 --> 00:03:04,768 Dani. 25 00:03:04,769 --> 00:03:09,232 Yeah. Nah, Jamie's a lot like my mom's Precious Moments figurines collection. 26 00:03:09,816 --> 00:03:12,336 - I have no idea what that means. - He's a fragile little bitch. 27 00:03:13,528 --> 00:03:16,781 Brevity is nice, but sometimes clarity is the true soul of wit. Thank you, Roy. 28 00:03:18,992 --> 00:03:20,826 It's almost ten o'clock, we should probably get going. 29 00:03:20,827 --> 00:03:22,077 You feeling okay? 30 00:03:22,078 --> 00:03:25,915 A little bit nervous. Had some diarrhea earlier this morning. 31 00:03:25,916 --> 00:03:27,334 Please don't put that in the book. 32 00:03:28,168 --> 00:03:30,211 I've never been clear on the spelling, so I probably won't. 33 00:03:30,212 --> 00:03:31,962 D-I-A, double R, H-E-A. 34 00:03:31,963 --> 00:03:36,801 Except in England, you have a silent O, as in, "Oh, no, you've got diarrhea." 35 00:03:37,385 --> 00:03:38,928 I'm in the same boat, Higgy bear. 36 00:03:38,929 --> 00:03:42,224 My tummy's got more knots in it than Wayne's World 1 and 2 smooshed together. 37 00:03:42,807 --> 00:03:44,975 I don't know why. I've been around great athletes all my life. 38 00:03:44,976 --> 00:03:46,477 Heck, Roy, you're a great athlete. 39 00:03:46,478 --> 00:03:47,811 Not like Zava. 40 00:03:47,812 --> 00:03:49,521 Come on, don't sell yourself short. 41 00:03:49,522 --> 00:03:51,732 If anything, sell yourself tall and get it altered later. 42 00:03:51,733 --> 00:03:53,984 No, Zava's different. Just watch. 43 00:03:53,985 --> 00:03:56,465 We can't just watch. We gotta make this fella part of the team. 44 00:03:57,155 --> 00:04:00,575 Coaching a superstar can't be all, "How do you solve a problem like Maria?" 45 00:04:01,493 --> 00:04:03,869 Although, if you ask me, the Nazis were the real problem in that story. 46 00:04:03,870 --> 00:04:05,663 - Am I right, Coach? - Yeah. Come on, Mother Superior, 47 00:04:05,664 --> 00:04:07,748 - let's have a little perspective. - Yeah, exactly, yeah. 48 00:04:07,749 --> 00:04:09,917 Sorry, Roy, I know you don't like all this musical theater talk 49 00:04:09,918 --> 00:04:11,627 - this early in the morning. - No, I'll allow it. 50 00:04:11,628 --> 00:04:14,755 I used to fancy Julie Andrews. Well, I still do, to be fair. 51 00:04:14,756 --> 00:04:18,842 The voice, the eyes, the way you know she'd tell you off if you'd been bad. 52 00:04:18,843 --> 00:04:19,928 Yeah. 53 00:04:21,930 --> 00:04:24,557 All right, we gotta do it. All-time favorite Julie Andrews character. Go! 54 00:04:24,558 --> 00:04:25,766 Fuck it. Maria! 55 00:04:25,767 --> 00:04:28,478 - Resolute as always. Coach, what you got? - Eliza Doolittle. 56 00:04:29,187 --> 00:04:31,189 Audio-only performance, I love that. 57 00:04:31,690 --> 00:04:33,315 - Professor Higgins. - Come on you Poppins! 58 00:04:33,316 --> 00:04:35,192 Same, I'm right there with you. 59 00:04:35,193 --> 00:04:36,986 Trent, you have one? You don't have to. You got one? 60 00:04:36,987 --> 00:04:39,322 Clarisse Renaldi, Queen of Genovia. 61 00:04:41,533 --> 00:04:43,200 Fuck yeah, Princess Diaries. 62 00:04:43,201 --> 00:04:45,327 Deep cut. Zagged. 63 00:04:45,328 --> 00:04:49,665 Wow. Wow. This is nice. 64 00:04:49,666 --> 00:04:51,418 I can't believe it's really happening. 65 00:04:51,918 --> 00:04:54,211 When I was a boy, I played in Zava boots, 66 00:04:54,212 --> 00:04:56,046 I slept in Zava boots, 67 00:04:56,047 --> 00:04:58,508 I made love for the first time to Zava boots. 68 00:04:59,092 --> 00:05:01,052 Think you mean "in Zava boots." 69 00:05:01,553 --> 00:05:02,554 No. 70 00:05:03,054 --> 00:05:04,930 Hey, you know, last night at the restaurant, 71 00:05:04,931 --> 00:05:06,307 as the painters were finishing up, 72 00:05:06,308 --> 00:05:09,810 I spent a very pleasurable hour on YouTube watching Zava's greatest goals. 73 00:05:09,811 --> 00:05:11,229 By the end, my head was spinning. 74 00:05:12,731 --> 00:05:14,481 Though it may also have been the paint fumes. 75 00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:18,528 The way Zava moves on the pitch... Like a panther. 76 00:05:19,321 --> 00:05:20,321 So sexy, eh? 77 00:05:21,114 --> 00:05:22,323 Sound a bit gay, bruv. 78 00:05:22,324 --> 00:05:23,407 Well, I'm gay... 79 00:05:23,408 --> 00:05:24,491 Huh? 80 00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:25,660 for Zava, I mean. 81 00:05:26,536 --> 00:05:29,623 That's true. Some men have a charisma that transcends orientation. 82 00:05:30,165 --> 00:05:33,168 Paul Newman, Idris Elba, Norm Macdonald. 83 00:05:34,002 --> 00:05:37,172 Zava is definitely one of those charisma unicorns. 84 00:05:37,797 --> 00:05:40,078 Okay, you guys have convinced me. I'll have sex with Zava. 85 00:05:44,804 --> 00:05:46,056 Hey, what's up, man? 86 00:05:47,015 --> 00:05:48,308 What the fuck is this? 87 00:05:50,227 --> 00:05:52,978 All right, fellas, come on. Showtime. Let's everybody head out to the pitch. 88 00:05:52,979 --> 00:05:54,563 - Let's go. - Hey Jamie, come on, man. 89 00:05:54,564 --> 00:05:57,484 Hurry up and get dressed. We don't wanna keep our newest teammate waiting. 90 00:05:58,360 --> 00:05:59,444 Let's do this. 91 00:06:03,490 --> 00:06:05,700 We want Zava! Come on! 92 00:06:12,249 --> 00:06:13,583 This is what you get. 93 00:06:20,924 --> 00:06:22,217 Where the hell is he? 94 00:06:23,385 --> 00:06:25,678 Leslie! We do have a signed contract, don't we? 95 00:06:25,679 --> 00:06:29,558 Of course. We have an e-signature. That's legally binding. 96 00:06:30,767 --> 00:06:31,851 I think. 97 00:06:33,979 --> 00:06:35,021 I'll make a call. 98 00:06:35,730 --> 00:06:37,565 His agent hasn't heard from him, 99 00:06:37,566 --> 00:06:40,859 but she's tracked his phone which is currently in Mykonos. 100 00:06:40,860 --> 00:06:42,444 If he has changed his mind again, 101 00:06:42,445 --> 00:06:44,573 I'm going to look like an absolute arsehole. 102 00:06:45,490 --> 00:06:48,201 Maybe we can try and cheer them up somehow? 103 00:06:49,369 --> 00:06:51,769 Do you want me to take my shirt off and run across the pitch? 104 00:06:52,622 --> 00:06:53,623 You must be Shandy. 105 00:06:54,541 --> 00:06:57,251 Shandy's shadowing me for the day. To get the hang of things, you know? 106 00:06:57,252 --> 00:06:59,378 It's so nice to finally meet you. 107 00:06:59,379 --> 00:07:01,631 I'd love to go for a coffee and pick your brain sometime. 108 00:07:02,382 --> 00:07:03,508 Like, how tall are you? 109 00:07:04,718 --> 00:07:05,759 - Shandy. - Yeah? 110 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:09,055 Would you go to concessions and start selling merch at half price? 111 00:07:09,639 --> 00:07:11,558 - Great idea. - Yeah, thank you. 112 00:07:12,225 --> 00:07:14,184 - Keep your shirt on. - Right. Of course. 113 00:07:14,185 --> 00:07:15,395 Bye, babe. 114 00:07:17,063 --> 00:07:18,690 She's a live one. 115 00:07:20,275 --> 00:07:21,609 Shit. Now I'm late. 116 00:07:21,610 --> 00:07:22,611 For what? 117 00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:27,407 Nothing. It's silly. I'll tell you later. 118 00:07:28,575 --> 00:07:30,619 I love mysterious Rebecca. 119 00:07:31,578 --> 00:07:35,414 Hey, guys. Are we sure that Zava has the right address? 120 00:07:35,415 --> 00:07:37,875 I'd hate to think he's sitting in the middle of Virginia right now 121 00:07:37,876 --> 00:07:39,502 waiting on us, you know? 122 00:07:40,212 --> 00:07:42,588 So, I just talked to legal about Zava's contract. 123 00:07:42,589 --> 00:07:45,674 An e-signature is 100% binding. 124 00:07:45,675 --> 00:07:49,595 Tiny wrinkle, instead of signing his name, he signed "You're welcome." 125 00:07:49,596 --> 00:07:51,555 Shit. What are we going to do? 126 00:07:51,556 --> 00:07:54,058 Hey, look, superstars play by their own rules. 127 00:07:54,059 --> 00:07:56,769 Back in '98, I waited over three hours for Public Enemy 128 00:07:56,770 --> 00:07:59,021 to take the stage of this joint called The Cubby Bear. 129 00:07:59,022 --> 00:08:01,565 When a man with a giant clock around his neck is that late, 130 00:08:01,566 --> 00:08:02,608 it ain't about time. 131 00:08:02,609 --> 00:08:03,652 He's making a statement. 132 00:08:05,111 --> 00:08:09,740 Right, I'm calling it. We're going to go upstairs and figure out what we do next. 133 00:08:09,741 --> 00:08:13,577 Leslie, I want you to talk to the crowd and tell them something. 134 00:08:13,578 --> 00:08:15,329 Of course, Rebecca. I got this. 135 00:08:15,330 --> 00:08:18,624 Back in uni, my deejay name was Damage Control. 136 00:08:18,625 --> 00:08:19,875 I didn't know you deejayed. 137 00:08:19,876 --> 00:08:22,503 I didn't actually, but I had the name ready if I ever started. 138 00:08:22,504 --> 00:08:24,297 - Shit. Right, come on, let's go. - Yeah. 139 00:08:31,221 --> 00:08:33,138 Welcome to the Dogtrack. 140 00:08:33,139 --> 00:08:34,683 Who the fuck are you? 141 00:08:38,186 --> 00:08:42,398 I can't believe this is happening. Why does anyone put up with this lunatic? 142 00:08:42,399 --> 00:08:44,901 Because as humans, we adapt to accommodate genius. 143 00:08:45,402 --> 00:08:46,777 Who is the greatest actor alive? 144 00:08:46,778 --> 00:08:48,195 Or was, before he retired. 145 00:08:48,196 --> 00:08:50,030 - Daniel Day-Lewis. - Tony Curtis. 146 00:08:50,031 --> 00:08:53,742 You said alive? Jackie Chan. Wait, you said retired? Daniel Day-Lewis. 147 00:08:53,743 --> 00:08:57,371 Exactly. When he gets in character, he stays in character, 148 00:08:57,372 --> 00:08:59,456 and everyone else adapts to him. 149 00:08:59,457 --> 00:09:01,417 Did you know, that when he made Lincoln 150 00:09:01,418 --> 00:09:04,086 he actually texted Sally Field as Abraham Lincoln? 151 00:09:04,087 --> 00:09:07,131 Well, that's ridiculous. Abraham Lincoln couldn't text. 152 00:09:07,132 --> 00:09:08,966 Exactly. Every time he looked down at his phone, 153 00:09:08,967 --> 00:09:10,135 his hat would fall off. 154 00:09:11,094 --> 00:09:15,765 Look, this Zava might be a genius, but he's definitely a self-absorbed prick. 155 00:09:17,475 --> 00:09:20,019 Your desk is covered in biscuit crumbs. 156 00:09:20,020 --> 00:09:24,232 What the fuck are you doing? We've waited two hours for you. 157 00:09:24,816 --> 00:09:28,277 Time is a construct, like gender and many of the alphabets. 158 00:09:28,278 --> 00:09:29,946 Get out of my chair! 159 00:09:32,574 --> 00:09:33,657 This is your manager. 160 00:09:33,658 --> 00:09:35,368 Hey, how you doing? I'm Ted Lasso. 161 00:09:39,748 --> 00:09:40,749 My leader, 162 00:09:41,541 --> 00:09:44,794 I am an empty vessel filled with gold. 163 00:09:46,588 --> 00:09:49,674 I am your rock. Mold me. 164 00:09:51,051 --> 00:09:52,843 Well, hey, if you score goals like you talk, 165 00:09:52,844 --> 00:09:54,004 we gonna be just fine, buddy. 166 00:09:55,305 --> 00:09:56,847 Right. And this is Keeley Jones. 167 00:09:56,848 --> 00:09:59,517 - She handles all our publicity. - Hi. 168 00:10:00,894 --> 00:10:02,103 My queen. 169 00:10:03,396 --> 00:10:06,190 My actions today have made your job much more difficult. 170 00:10:06,191 --> 00:10:10,361 No, don't worry about it. No such thing as bad press, right? 171 00:10:10,362 --> 00:10:13,197 My integrity disallows me to agree with that statement. 172 00:10:13,198 --> 00:10:16,158 - For God's sake. - He's allergic to hummus. 173 00:10:16,159 --> 00:10:20,455 - Yeah, I know, I know. - Oh, my God. You're here. 174 00:10:21,706 --> 00:10:22,706 And you are there. 175 00:10:22,707 --> 00:10:25,544 And this is Leslie Higgins, our director of football. 176 00:10:32,717 --> 00:10:34,386 You are the glue. 177 00:10:37,472 --> 00:10:38,557 Thank you very much. 178 00:10:43,061 --> 00:10:44,521 I will go see the team now. 179 00:10:50,860 --> 00:10:53,028 Do you even know where you're going? 180 00:10:53,029 --> 00:10:54,114 I do not! 181 00:10:58,243 --> 00:11:00,495 Are you kidding me? Wowie zowie. 182 00:11:01,454 --> 00:11:04,540 You know what, maybe I oughta tag along in case he gets nervous. 183 00:11:04,541 --> 00:11:06,918 Seems like he can be a little bit of a wallflower. 184 00:11:08,378 --> 00:11:10,045 Great. And now I'm in a rush. 185 00:11:10,046 --> 00:11:13,173 Leslie, tell me, how did the damage control go? 186 00:11:13,174 --> 00:11:17,053 - It was a mess, but he was adorable. - Thank you. 187 00:11:17,888 --> 00:11:20,473 - Who is this? - This is Shandy. We work together. 188 00:11:21,474 --> 00:11:22,794 And she's a great friend of mine. 189 00:11:26,563 --> 00:11:28,731 - Hey, did Zava come through here? - He's here? You saw him? 190 00:11:28,732 --> 00:11:30,566 Yeah, he was upstairs just a second ago. 191 00:11:30,567 --> 00:11:32,026 - What? He's here? - He's here! 192 00:11:32,027 --> 00:11:34,069 - In this building? - Yes. He should be here. 193 00:11:34,070 --> 00:11:35,363 Oh, my God. 194 00:11:37,699 --> 00:11:39,867 Okay, maybe we should all just split up and go... 195 00:11:39,868 --> 00:11:41,286 Oy. 196 00:11:53,590 --> 00:11:54,674 He touched me. 197 00:12:02,849 --> 00:12:04,142 He's like an angel. 198 00:12:06,353 --> 00:12:10,774 Why are you downgrading him? He is clearly a god. 199 00:12:25,747 --> 00:12:30,377 I will begin by addressing the most important person in this room. 200 00:12:33,505 --> 00:12:35,173 Which of you is the kit man? 201 00:12:39,803 --> 00:12:41,137 Yeah, he usually... 202 00:12:43,807 --> 00:12:46,684 That's me. I'm Will. 203 00:12:46,685 --> 00:12:47,686 I am... 204 00:12:49,437 --> 00:12:51,398 - Will. - Yep. 205 00:12:56,820 --> 00:13:02,283 I too worked as a ball boy for a club when I was just 11 years old. 206 00:13:02,284 --> 00:13:03,826 I'm 25. 207 00:13:03,827 --> 00:13:05,078 Your passion... 208 00:13:07,289 --> 00:13:08,498 is why I play. 209 00:13:11,918 --> 00:13:12,919 And you. 210 00:13:16,882 --> 00:13:17,924 My team. 211 00:13:20,302 --> 00:13:21,595 My brothers. 212 00:13:22,470 --> 00:13:23,805 Breathe with me. 213 00:13:27,601 --> 00:13:28,935 Right now? Okay, here we go. 214 00:14:01,676 --> 00:14:03,178 We are now one. 215 00:14:05,013 --> 00:14:06,056 There is no me. 216 00:14:07,974 --> 00:14:09,184 There is no you. 217 00:14:10,143 --> 00:14:12,354 There is only the "we"... 218 00:14:14,981 --> 00:14:16,107 and the "us." 219 00:14:20,487 --> 00:14:21,571 And the we in us. 220 00:14:30,413 --> 00:14:31,498 Okay, so... 221 00:14:35,835 --> 00:14:37,003 Okay. 222 00:14:37,671 --> 00:14:39,547 Coaches, let's go in here, 223 00:14:39,548 --> 00:14:41,757 have a word really quickly, before he scurries off. 224 00:14:41,758 --> 00:14:44,260 Everybody else, just go ahead and keep breathing amongst yourselves. 225 00:14:44,261 --> 00:14:46,804 He's so much more down-to-earth than I imagined. 226 00:14:46,805 --> 00:14:47,931 - Right? - Wow. 227 00:15:06,241 --> 00:15:08,493 Which one of these is me? 228 00:15:09,911 --> 00:15:11,204 You're the fucking coach. 229 00:15:12,747 --> 00:15:14,915 You know what, we were thinking the top right. 230 00:15:14,916 --> 00:15:17,001 - Fuck's sake. - Or left, or left, or left. 231 00:15:17,002 --> 00:15:18,753 Whichever one you want really. 232 00:15:44,279 --> 00:15:46,489 I am very excited to be here. 233 00:15:47,616 --> 00:15:49,283 - Hey, we're very excited... - I will see you tomorrow. 234 00:15:49,284 --> 00:15:50,368 Yep. 235 00:15:57,918 --> 00:15:59,002 He's tall. 236 00:16:21,358 --> 00:16:22,484 Rebecca? 237 00:16:23,568 --> 00:16:25,487 - Tish. Hello there. - Come in. 238 00:16:31,952 --> 00:16:32,953 Come through. 239 00:16:37,540 --> 00:16:39,167 Please make yourself at home. 240 00:16:48,426 --> 00:16:51,012 Yeah, just take a seat. Relax. 241 00:16:55,475 --> 00:16:57,393 Would you like something to drink? 242 00:16:57,394 --> 00:17:00,896 Water? Tea? Or cocktail, perhaps? 243 00:17:00,897 --> 00:17:03,650 Sure, I'll have a White Russian, thanks. 244 00:17:04,651 --> 00:17:06,570 Yeah, I'm afraid I'm fresh out of Kahlúa 245 00:17:07,404 --> 00:17:11,740 after hosting a Big Lebowski themed birthday party for a colleague. 246 00:17:11,741 --> 00:17:13,199 But would straight vodka suffice? 247 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:15,910 I was literally just making a joke. 248 00:17:15,911 --> 00:17:19,457 I know. Which is why I made two. 249 00:17:30,677 --> 00:17:32,762 You have been through a lot recently. 250 00:17:36,099 --> 00:17:40,896 The dark soul of one man just disconnected you from your own. 251 00:17:42,188 --> 00:17:48,611 And then another beautiful and worthy soul, in a man half your age, 252 00:17:48,612 --> 00:17:52,115 arrived exactly at the right time. And the wrong time. 253 00:17:52,741 --> 00:17:54,117 Sorry, how do you know that? 254 00:17:54,951 --> 00:17:58,622 Well, I speak to your mother once a month for the last six years. 255 00:18:00,248 --> 00:18:02,000 So, Rebecca, how can I help you? 256 00:18:03,543 --> 00:18:04,961 I'm not sure you can. 257 00:18:05,962 --> 00:18:08,380 A skeptic. Well, I shouldn't be surprised. 258 00:18:08,381 --> 00:18:10,716 Because you're supposed to be a psychic? 259 00:18:10,717 --> 00:18:11,843 Oh, no. 260 00:18:13,595 --> 00:18:15,347 Because your mother was a skeptic. 261 00:18:18,975 --> 00:18:21,561 Are you familiar with kintsugi? 262 00:18:22,062 --> 00:18:26,857 It's the Japanese art of mending broken things with gold. 263 00:18:26,858 --> 00:18:28,025 It... 264 00:18:28,026 --> 00:18:33,280 The idea is that we embrace the flaws and the imperfections, 265 00:18:33,281 --> 00:18:37,327 and in doing so create something much stronger and more beautiful. 266 00:18:39,996 --> 00:18:40,997 So... 267 00:18:42,958 --> 00:18:45,960 we are going to place our hands on the bowl. 268 00:18:45,961 --> 00:18:47,337 Would you? 269 00:18:57,931 --> 00:18:58,932 Sorry, what's that... 270 00:19:02,435 --> 00:19:04,271 Smells very odd in here all of a sudden. 271 00:19:05,438 --> 00:19:06,606 Thank you. 272 00:19:09,317 --> 00:19:10,610 Let's begin. 273 00:19:15,282 --> 00:19:16,741 I can see something. 274 00:19:18,493 --> 00:19:22,122 It's in your hand. An object. It's very special. 275 00:19:22,789 --> 00:19:23,873 Is it a bowl? 276 00:19:25,834 --> 00:19:27,210 It's a green matchbook. 277 00:19:28,378 --> 00:19:29,838 Sorry, it's what? 278 00:19:30,714 --> 00:19:32,883 A green matchbook. How lovely. 279 00:19:33,466 --> 00:19:35,302 Sorry, who cares about a green matchbook? 280 00:19:36,052 --> 00:19:37,429 Now I can hear something. 281 00:19:38,430 --> 00:19:39,680 Shite! 282 00:19:39,681 --> 00:19:40,932 Oh, for God's sake. 283 00:19:43,935 --> 00:19:45,519 No, just one at a time, please. 284 00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:46,521 I... 285 00:19:47,022 --> 00:19:50,108 Shite in wh... Shite in nin... Sh... 286 00:19:51,026 --> 00:19:53,402 Yeah, shite in nining armor. 287 00:19:53,403 --> 00:19:56,573 "A shite in nining armor"? 288 00:19:57,282 --> 00:19:59,742 - Does that mean something to you? - Yes, it does mean something to me. 289 00:19:59,743 --> 00:20:01,577 It means you're even more batshit crazy than I... 290 00:20:01,578 --> 00:20:04,997 Shut up, I can hear something else. It's thunder and lightning and you. 291 00:20:04,998 --> 00:20:09,126 And you're upside down, and you're drenched. 292 00:20:09,127 --> 00:20:10,377 But you're safe. 293 00:20:10,378 --> 00:20:14,381 Okay, that... That's enough I think for today. 294 00:20:14,382 --> 00:20:19,763 But thank you so much for your time and for sharing your, 295 00:20:20,597 --> 00:20:21,848 what is it, your gift? 296 00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,727 We can just tell my mum I did the whole session. Yes? 297 00:20:26,895 --> 00:20:28,271 You will have a family. 298 00:20:31,358 --> 00:20:32,901 Sorry, what did you just say? 299 00:20:34,444 --> 00:20:35,654 You're going to be a mother. 300 00:20:37,739 --> 00:20:38,823 Fuck you. 301 00:20:40,450 --> 00:20:42,576 I've always thought you were completely harmless 302 00:20:42,577 --> 00:20:45,538 because my mum could afford you, but you are actually dangerous. 303 00:20:47,290 --> 00:20:48,667 And you're fucking cruel. 304 00:20:58,301 --> 00:21:00,678 So, boys, exciting stuff. 305 00:21:00,679 --> 00:21:03,181 We've got a lot of interview requests coming in for all of you. 306 00:21:03,890 --> 00:21:05,808 I'd love to get the word out about the restaurant. 307 00:21:05,809 --> 00:21:10,271 Well, right now the press would like to focus on Zava joining the team. 308 00:21:10,272 --> 00:21:11,355 Yeah, okay. 309 00:21:11,356 --> 00:21:13,566 I would rather talk about Zava than myself any day. 310 00:21:13,567 --> 00:21:15,067 What do you want us to say? 311 00:21:15,068 --> 00:21:17,695 Well, that's up to you. Go for it. Say anything. 312 00:21:17,696 --> 00:21:21,491 I would just, you know, stay positive, light. Right? 313 00:21:21,992 --> 00:21:26,204 Or say something so shocking your interview goes viral. 314 00:21:27,581 --> 00:21:29,081 Like you eat your own hair. 315 00:21:29,082 --> 00:21:30,500 No, I... 316 00:21:32,168 --> 00:21:34,879 Well... Hi, Roy. 317 00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:37,047 Keeley, sorry to interrupt. 318 00:21:37,048 --> 00:21:38,132 No. 319 00:21:38,133 --> 00:21:41,344 Higgins told me to check in on some dumb interview shit. 320 00:21:42,554 --> 00:21:47,141 I mean, some important interview shit. 321 00:21:47,142 --> 00:21:49,603 Don't worry, nobody in the press wants to talk to you. 322 00:21:50,186 --> 00:21:52,062 No, no. That's not actually true. 323 00:21:52,063 --> 00:21:54,231 The press knows that Roy doesn't love doing interviews. 324 00:21:54,232 --> 00:21:57,610 Yeah, but it's okay. I'll do one for you if you need me to. 325 00:21:57,611 --> 00:21:59,362 - Thanks, Roy. - I'll interview you. 326 00:22:00,363 --> 00:22:01,697 Why'd you dump my friend? 327 00:22:01,698 --> 00:22:03,199 Ay, ay, ay. 328 00:22:05,827 --> 00:22:06,995 You're fun. 329 00:22:07,579 --> 00:22:09,079 Who the fuck is this? 330 00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:10,665 This is Shandy. We work together. 331 00:22:11,249 --> 00:22:13,208 - Why? - She's an old friend of mine. 332 00:22:13,209 --> 00:22:14,960 That makes more sense. 333 00:22:14,961 --> 00:22:16,796 Shandy. I definitely told you about her. 334 00:22:17,881 --> 00:22:20,884 Oh, yeah. Shandy. 335 00:22:22,427 --> 00:22:24,137 You used to eat your own hair, right? 336 00:22:24,971 --> 00:22:27,557 Yeah. I did. 337 00:22:29,434 --> 00:22:34,022 Well, nice to put a face to the hair. 338 00:22:43,782 --> 00:22:45,282 Hey, Coach. 339 00:22:45,283 --> 00:22:46,408 What's today's Wordle? 340 00:22:46,409 --> 00:22:48,119 - Ethic. - Ethic. 341 00:22:50,830 --> 00:22:51,873 You're a jerk. 342 00:22:53,917 --> 00:22:56,377 - Hey, Jamie. How you doing? - Can I talk to you for a minute? 343 00:22:56,378 --> 00:22:58,003 Yeah, you can talk to me as long as you want. 344 00:22:58,004 --> 00:23:00,339 Though I do have a tendency to doze off around 1:00 a.m. 345 00:23:00,340 --> 00:23:02,300 - What's up? - So look... 346 00:23:07,597 --> 00:23:09,181 I know we're all excited Zava's here. 347 00:23:09,182 --> 00:23:12,768 Yeah, I get that. But I know a lot of players like him, 348 00:23:12,769 --> 00:23:14,979 and they're all just self-absorbed glory hunters 349 00:23:14,980 --> 00:23:16,690 who only care about themselves. 350 00:23:22,112 --> 00:23:22,946 Jamie, 351 00:23:22,947 --> 00:23:27,951 don't you think that coming from you that's a little bit ironic? 352 00:23:30,245 --> 00:23:31,371 Don't know. 353 00:23:33,206 --> 00:23:36,792 But look, the point is, we don't need this guy. 354 00:23:36,793 --> 00:23:40,380 I think we've got a good thing going here, and he's already fucking it all up. 355 00:23:41,131 --> 00:23:43,216 Hey, Jamie, I hear what you're saying, man. 356 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:46,553 But I think we've got to give it a game or two and see what's what. 357 00:23:48,263 --> 00:23:50,431 Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, no, yeah. Course, yeah. 358 00:23:50,432 --> 00:23:53,267 Well, thanks for hearing me out. 359 00:23:53,268 --> 00:23:56,687 Aight. Thanks for speaking your mind. Please continue to do so. 360 00:23:56,688 --> 00:23:57,772 Yeah. 361 00:23:58,732 --> 00:23:59,940 And... And I... 362 00:23:59,941 --> 00:24:03,695 I weren't being ironic, I was being hypocritical. That's it. 363 00:24:06,865 --> 00:24:07,865 Is that right? 364 00:24:10,035 --> 00:24:12,370 - Yes or no? - Yes. 365 00:24:13,830 --> 00:24:15,248 So that was actually ironic. 366 00:24:18,251 --> 00:24:22,004 Good afternoon. There is an electricity today at Nelson Road, 367 00:24:22,005 --> 00:24:26,301 and the cause of all this excitement goes by one name, Zava. 368 00:24:26,885 --> 00:24:29,095 Like Pelé, if every letter was different. 369 00:24:30,931 --> 00:24:34,309 There are more VIPs here than London Fashion Week. 370 00:24:34,976 --> 00:24:36,268 I assume. I don't know. 371 00:24:36,269 --> 00:24:38,395 This is all 'cause you got Zava, babe. 372 00:24:38,396 --> 00:24:40,357 You've made Richmond fucking global. 373 00:24:46,446 --> 00:24:48,781 All right. Pop quiz, hotshots. 374 00:24:48,782 --> 00:24:52,117 What do you get when you combine one of Hugh Jackman's finest film roles 375 00:24:52,118 --> 00:24:54,245 with a fancy-pants New York City getaway? 376 00:24:54,246 --> 00:24:55,830 Jean Valjean Catskills? 377 00:24:56,581 --> 00:24:59,541 No. That's a great answer, Sam. How do you know about the Catskills? 378 00:24:59,542 --> 00:25:00,918 Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. 379 00:25:00,919 --> 00:25:02,545 Yeah. That's a good show. 380 00:25:02,546 --> 00:25:04,171 Yeah. I respect that. Word. 381 00:25:04,172 --> 00:25:08,092 No, the answer I was looking for actually was today's opponents, Wolverhampton. 382 00:25:08,093 --> 00:25:10,761 - Full name, Wolverhampton Wanderers. - Thank you. 383 00:25:10,762 --> 00:25:12,805 - Also known as the Wanderers. - No. 384 00:25:12,806 --> 00:25:14,265 Also known as Wolves. 385 00:25:14,266 --> 00:25:17,685 Okay. So, our opponents today are the Wolverhampton Wandering Wolves. 386 00:25:17,686 --> 00:25:20,437 - No. - Just Wolverhampton or Wolves. 387 00:25:20,438 --> 00:25:24,650 Got it. So when the team known as Wolverhampton, or Wolves, 388 00:25:24,651 --> 00:25:27,945 is wandering around the pitch today trying to score some soccer goals, 389 00:25:27,946 --> 00:25:29,113 here's the game plan. 390 00:25:29,114 --> 00:25:30,364 Take it away, fellas. 391 00:25:30,365 --> 00:25:32,575 All right, here's your starters. Here's your subs. 392 00:25:32,576 --> 00:25:35,327 Now remember, this 4-5-1 is not about dropping back. 393 00:25:35,328 --> 00:25:38,914 It's about getting fucking service into the box for Zava. 394 00:25:38,915 --> 00:25:39,916 Got it? 395 00:25:40,709 --> 00:25:41,710 Are you all right? 396 00:25:43,211 --> 00:25:45,213 I am still a strong and capable man. 397 00:25:46,590 --> 00:25:47,590 You're all right. 398 00:25:47,591 --> 00:25:50,009 - All free kicks will be taken by... - Zava. 399 00:25:50,010 --> 00:25:51,552 - All penalties... - Zava. 400 00:25:51,553 --> 00:25:54,179 - All corners... - Anyone to Zava. 401 00:25:54,180 --> 00:25:57,601 That's it. You fellas set 'em up, and our man Zava's gonna... 402 00:25:59,686 --> 00:26:02,439 Well, he's gonna knock 'em down. Okay? Yeah. 403 00:26:06,610 --> 00:26:08,737 Okay. Let's bring it in. Come on. Here. 404 00:26:17,787 --> 00:26:18,788 Zava. 405 00:26:21,374 --> 00:26:22,374 Zava. 406 00:26:23,793 --> 00:26:25,461 Am I supposed to hit the gong or something? 407 00:26:25,462 --> 00:26:27,130 What's up with that shit? 408 00:26:33,261 --> 00:26:34,261 No. 409 00:26:37,682 --> 00:26:38,933 Okay. 410 00:26:38,934 --> 00:26:40,142 I am ready. 411 00:26:40,143 --> 00:26:42,437 Okay. Nicely done. 412 00:26:43,772 --> 00:26:45,022 Okay. Here we go. 413 00:26:45,023 --> 00:26:48,693 All right. Okay, Captain, why don't you go ahead and flip it... 414 00:26:51,363 --> 00:26:54,323 Richmond on three. One, two, three. 415 00:26:54,324 --> 00:26:57,869 Richmond! 416 00:26:59,871 --> 00:27:00,997 He's strong. 417 00:27:04,376 --> 00:27:05,377 Yeah. 418 00:27:07,087 --> 00:27:09,256 - The Precious Moments figurine. - Little bitch. 419 00:27:13,260 --> 00:27:15,636 - How much time we got, Coach? - Exactly four minutes. 420 00:27:15,637 --> 00:27:16,804 Okay, great. 421 00:27:16,805 --> 00:27:18,681 I'm gonna call Henry real quick. Wish him luck. 422 00:27:18,682 --> 00:27:20,391 His soccer team starts the playoffs today. 423 00:27:20,392 --> 00:27:22,018 - Nice. - Yeah. 424 00:27:23,103 --> 00:27:24,770 - Uh-oh. - What's wrong? 425 00:27:24,771 --> 00:27:26,439 I can't find my phone. 426 00:27:28,108 --> 00:27:29,568 Shoot, I know where it is. 427 00:27:30,443 --> 00:27:32,528 I left it sitting on my bathroom sink. Dang it. 428 00:27:32,529 --> 00:27:34,781 That's what you get for playing Tetris on the toilet. 429 00:27:35,865 --> 00:27:36,949 Yeah, that and numb legs. 430 00:27:36,950 --> 00:27:39,430 You know, that's all right, I'll persevere. I'll go old school. 431 00:27:43,248 --> 00:27:44,624 - Uh-oh. - What now? 432 00:27:45,834 --> 00:27:47,919 I can't remember Michelle's cell phone number. 433 00:27:49,462 --> 00:27:50,462 Yeah. 434 00:27:50,463 --> 00:27:53,258 - Is that a good thing or a bad thing? - I think it's just a thing. 435 00:27:54,134 --> 00:27:55,135 Well, yeah. 436 00:27:56,303 --> 00:27:58,137 - You okay? - Yeah. No, no. 437 00:27:58,138 --> 00:28:01,266 I'll just call the house. No, I... No, I'm good. I'll be right out. 438 00:28:04,477 --> 00:28:08,355 Henry, we gotta go! And don't forget your shin guards! 439 00:28:08,356 --> 00:28:09,566 Okay! 440 00:28:10,150 --> 00:28:12,152 - Thanks again for driving. - Yeah, no problem. 441 00:28:15,113 --> 00:28:18,199 - You still have a landline? - Yeah. I don't know why. 442 00:28:19,868 --> 00:28:21,285 Are you gonna answer it? 443 00:28:21,286 --> 00:28:23,662 No. It's probably a telemarketer. 444 00:28:23,663 --> 00:28:25,081 Henry, let's go! 445 00:28:26,207 --> 00:28:27,374 May I answer it? 446 00:28:27,375 --> 00:28:29,669 I have a thing for messing with telemarketers. 447 00:28:30,253 --> 00:28:32,880 - Knock yourself out. - Oh, boy. Oh, boy. 448 00:28:32,881 --> 00:28:34,341 Watch this. 449 00:28:35,425 --> 00:28:39,094 Hello. You've reached the house of Michelle Keller. 450 00:28:39,095 --> 00:28:42,598 Who by the way is doing amazing things with orange slices these days. 451 00:28:42,599 --> 00:28:45,059 You're gonna be amazed. It's really spectacular. 452 00:28:45,060 --> 00:28:46,310 How can I help you? 453 00:28:46,311 --> 00:28:48,187 Well, hey, Mr. Former President. 454 00:28:48,188 --> 00:28:49,898 Boy, have I got a bone to pick with you. 455 00:28:52,943 --> 00:28:53,944 Hello? 456 00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:58,281 Hello? 457 00:29:01,493 --> 00:29:02,494 Ted. 458 00:29:03,662 --> 00:29:06,957 - Yeah. Who is this? - This is Jacob Bryanson. 459 00:29:07,749 --> 00:29:08,749 Dr. Jacob? 460 00:29:08,750 --> 00:29:11,711 Yeah. Ted, you can just call me Jake. 461 00:29:13,296 --> 00:29:14,296 Dr. Jacob. 462 00:29:14,297 --> 00:29:16,298 Henry, come on! 463 00:29:16,299 --> 00:29:17,676 Michelle. Michelle. 464 00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:20,804 - What? - It's Ted. 465 00:29:25,058 --> 00:29:26,059 Shit. 466 00:29:28,478 --> 00:29:30,604 - Hi, Ted. - Hey. 467 00:29:30,605 --> 00:29:31,731 Found 'em! 468 00:29:32,315 --> 00:29:35,109 Hey, sweetie. Do you want to talk to Daddy really quick? 469 00:29:35,110 --> 00:29:37,486 - Dad. - Hey, buddy. 470 00:29:37,487 --> 00:29:40,364 We're playing the Dragons today, and they're undefeated. 471 00:29:40,365 --> 00:29:43,245 Yeah, well, you know they ain't gonna be undefeated for long. Am I right? 472 00:29:44,911 --> 00:29:47,121 Hey, look, I was just calling to wish you good luck. 473 00:29:47,122 --> 00:29:48,706 Good luck to you too, Dad. 474 00:29:48,707 --> 00:29:52,710 And please tell Zava that many of my friends' moms like his abs. 475 00:29:52,711 --> 00:29:53,878 Will do. 476 00:29:53,879 --> 00:29:55,255 - Bye. - Bye. 477 00:29:56,047 --> 00:29:57,423 Thank you, sweetie. 478 00:29:57,424 --> 00:29:58,841 Ted, just one second, okay? 479 00:29:58,842 --> 00:29:59,925 Do you wanna wait in the car? 480 00:29:59,926 --> 00:30:03,095 - Do you wanna take him to the... Thank you. - Yes. Of course. Come on, bud. 481 00:30:03,096 --> 00:30:05,098 You ever seen a sunroof? Pretty cool. 482 00:30:09,102 --> 00:30:10,729 Hi. Sorry. 483 00:30:12,314 --> 00:30:14,357 Can we chat when we both have more time? 484 00:30:15,567 --> 00:30:16,985 There's a lot to catch up on. 485 00:30:18,361 --> 00:30:19,654 Yeah. No, of course. 486 00:30:20,488 --> 00:30:22,824 All good. I'll talk to you later. 487 00:30:23,867 --> 00:30:27,037 Ted, I... Good luck today. 488 00:30:27,954 --> 00:30:28,955 Thanks. 489 00:30:40,967 --> 00:30:44,011 The Richmond faithful return to their beloved Dogtrack 490 00:30:44,012 --> 00:30:46,680 for the first time this Premier League season, 491 00:30:46,681 --> 00:30:50,100 and surely when they see the name Zava on the team sheet, 492 00:30:50,101 --> 00:30:52,312 they'll think they've died and gone to heaven. 493 00:30:53,647 --> 00:30:56,107 Come on! Let's go! Let's do it! 494 00:31:00,528 --> 00:31:01,529 Tartt. 495 00:31:04,658 --> 00:31:05,659 What's he doing now? 496 00:31:07,369 --> 00:31:08,370 Yeah? 497 00:31:09,371 --> 00:31:12,916 Get open. I will find you. 498 00:31:21,258 --> 00:31:22,551 Come on, boys! Come on! 499 00:31:28,098 --> 00:31:29,307 Let's go, boys. 500 00:31:44,614 --> 00:31:46,574 My word, he's done it! 501 00:31:46,575 --> 00:31:50,996 Zava has scored from the halfway line seconds into his debut, 502 00:31:51,496 --> 00:31:54,583 and the Dogtrack is in a state of rapture. 503 00:31:56,543 --> 00:31:58,461 - Yeah. All right. - He might be pretty good. 504 00:31:58,962 --> 00:32:00,922 - Here we go. - I could get used to this shit. 505 00:32:02,173 --> 00:32:05,427 - Zava! Zava! - Yes. Yes. Yay. 506 00:32:18,189 --> 00:32:21,359 Bumbercatch with the cross. It's a tricky one for Zava. 507 00:32:23,111 --> 00:32:27,072 - I cannot believe what I just saw. - What? 508 00:32:27,073 --> 00:32:31,745 Zava with the scorpion kick, and Burnley feel the sting. 509 00:32:35,999 --> 00:32:41,796 Om. 510 00:32:44,090 --> 00:32:47,344 Om. 511 00:33:00,273 --> 00:33:05,027 Richmond up 2-nil over Palace, who have simply had no answer for Zava. 512 00:33:05,028 --> 00:33:06,528 The corner comes in, 513 00:33:06,529 --> 00:33:10,867 And it's that man again! Zava, with a towering header! 514 00:33:12,327 --> 00:33:14,871 Soaring like an eagle amongst penguins. 515 00:33:42,232 --> 00:33:43,984 - How do you do? - Morning. 516 00:33:46,486 --> 00:33:47,737 I think it's good. 517 00:33:48,863 --> 00:33:50,281 And then maybe do a... 518 00:33:50,282 --> 00:33:52,367 I think we should put it in. Do you think we should? 519 00:34:18,476 --> 00:34:20,895 Rojas finds Tartt. 520 00:34:20,896 --> 00:34:25,107 Still seeking his first goal of the season, is this the moment? 521 00:34:25,108 --> 00:34:28,027 No, it's Zava again! 522 00:34:28,028 --> 00:34:31,529 Zava, Zava, Zava, Zava! 523 00:34:31,530 --> 00:34:34,199 He may have stolen the goal from Jamie Tartt, 524 00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:37,412 but you can't argue with the instincts of a champion. 525 00:34:39,623 --> 00:34:40,788 If you're a Richmond fan, 526 00:34:40,789 --> 00:34:44,461 you've gotta feel that with Zava everything is going your way. 527 00:34:45,795 --> 00:34:46,880 I got a job! 528 00:35:00,769 --> 00:35:01,603 Thank you. 529 00:35:01,604 --> 00:35:03,771 I mean, the whole thing is just crazy, you know. 530 00:35:03,772 --> 00:35:05,772 He was supposed to be helping us get back together. 531 00:35:06,316 --> 00:35:07,399 You know what I mean? 532 00:35:07,400 --> 00:35:10,736 It always bothered me the way he'd be like, "I'm sorry, our time is up." 533 00:35:10,737 --> 00:35:12,279 Sorry, our time is up. 534 00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:14,573 Nah, that's not quite it. It was a lot more condescending. 535 00:35:14,574 --> 00:35:16,283 It was more like, "I'm so sorry." 536 00:35:16,284 --> 00:35:19,245 Ted, I'm talking about our session. Our time is up. 537 00:35:19,246 --> 00:35:21,914 Oh, right. Sorry I didn't get to ask any personal questions. 538 00:35:21,915 --> 00:35:23,583 I was just yammering. 539 00:35:24,501 --> 00:35:26,586 Wow. Gone. Okay. 540 00:35:28,213 --> 00:35:29,214 Gotta respect it. 541 00:35:30,173 --> 00:35:33,551 George, is Ted Lasso the coach of the year? 542 00:35:33,552 --> 00:35:36,262 What? Writing the name Zava on the team sheet? 543 00:35:36,263 --> 00:35:39,306 Come on. Gimme a break, Jeff. That's not coaching. 544 00:35:39,307 --> 00:35:41,934 No. What Nathan Shelley's doing over at West Ham, 545 00:35:41,935 --> 00:35:44,271 now that is a tactician at work. 546 00:35:44,980 --> 00:35:46,106 Yeah, I like West Ham. 547 00:35:46,815 --> 00:35:47,815 But I love Zava. 548 00:35:47,816 --> 00:35:49,192 Don't we all, mate? 549 00:35:54,614 --> 00:35:58,158 We're in stoppage time of what has been an unforgettable contest. 550 00:35:58,159 --> 00:36:00,411 Richmond surely would be happy with a draw, 551 00:36:00,412 --> 00:36:03,622 but here's Rojas with a chance to steal an historic victory 552 00:36:03,623 --> 00:36:05,292 over Manchester United. 553 00:36:14,426 --> 00:36:18,220 Zava with a God-like bicycle kick in injury time. 554 00:36:18,221 --> 00:36:20,347 And surely Richmond have won it. 555 00:36:20,348 --> 00:36:26,313 A Zava hat trick bringing their first ever victory in the Theatre of Dreams. 556 00:36:29,316 --> 00:36:32,152 Yes! Yeah, yeah, yeah! 557 00:36:34,696 --> 00:36:35,697 Fuck it! 558 00:36:40,410 --> 00:36:42,620 And with this victory over Brentford 559 00:36:42,621 --> 00:36:45,164 that's six wins on the bounce for Richmond 560 00:36:45,165 --> 00:36:48,251 in this Zava-fueled miracle streak. 561 00:36:54,174 --> 00:36:56,467 You ever think your book would be a fucking fairy tale? 562 00:36:56,468 --> 00:36:57,969 Come on! 563 00:37:02,140 --> 00:37:04,850 Yo! Yo, yo, yo! Hey! Guys, guys, guys. Yo, yo. Check it out. 564 00:37:04,851 --> 00:37:07,938 Listen. Tomorrow, everybody is invited to the restaurant. 565 00:37:11,191 --> 00:37:13,067 We're still a few weeks from officially opening. 566 00:37:13,068 --> 00:37:15,194 So please, lower your expectations. 567 00:37:15,195 --> 00:37:16,488 But it's gonna be an open bar! 568 00:37:27,332 --> 00:37:30,669 Zava, Zava, Zava, Zava, Zava, Zava! 569 00:37:34,589 --> 00:37:37,801 - Okay. Okay. What do I need? Hey. - Hey. Don't serve my food with that face. 570 00:37:38,426 --> 00:37:39,427 Okay. 571 00:37:41,012 --> 00:37:42,013 Oh, man. 572 00:37:43,056 --> 00:37:44,223 - Hey. - Sam, this place is lovely. 573 00:37:44,224 --> 00:37:46,392 - Have a great night. - Thank you. Nice seeing you. 574 00:37:46,393 --> 00:37:48,852 - Super great place. - Yeah. 575 00:37:48,853 --> 00:37:50,479 Thank you. I'll come and catch you, yeah? 576 00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:51,981 - Peace. - All right. I'll see you later. 577 00:37:51,982 --> 00:37:55,025 - Hello. Okay. This is for you. - The smell. 578 00:37:55,026 --> 00:37:56,485 - That's for you. - Nice. 579 00:37:56,486 --> 00:37:59,113 Mate, this is the best moimoi I've ever tasted in my life. 580 00:37:59,114 --> 00:38:00,949 Thanks, man. 581 00:38:01,783 --> 00:38:04,577 - Look at me. I'm not kidding. - Hey. 582 00:38:04,578 --> 00:38:06,162 Thank you. Thanks. 583 00:38:06,788 --> 00:38:10,332 Sam, is Zava coming? I made him a friendship bracelet. 584 00:38:10,333 --> 00:38:12,668 Well, I invited him. I guess we'll see. 585 00:38:12,669 --> 00:38:13,878 Cool, man. 586 00:38:13,879 --> 00:38:15,546 Okay, you guys. Enjoy the food, okay? 587 00:38:15,547 --> 00:38:16,631 - All right? - Cool, bro. 588 00:38:17,132 --> 00:38:19,509 - Colin. - Hi, hi. 589 00:38:20,135 --> 00:38:21,802 - Doing good? - Yeah, you okay? 590 00:38:21,803 --> 00:38:23,387 Boyos, this is my pal Michael. 591 00:38:23,388 --> 00:38:24,889 - Hiya. - What's up, man? 592 00:38:24,890 --> 00:38:27,933 - World's greatest wingman. - Yeah. Tough gig. 593 00:38:27,934 --> 00:38:30,853 "Hello, young lady. My friend's a professional footballer. 594 00:38:30,854 --> 00:38:33,063 May I spend all night talking to your cross-eyed friend 595 00:38:33,064 --> 00:38:34,733 while he hits on you poorly?" 596 00:38:38,111 --> 00:38:40,237 What did you decide after Tish's reading? 597 00:38:40,238 --> 00:38:42,948 - Are you gonna go back and see her? - No. No, no. 598 00:38:42,949 --> 00:38:45,826 It's not for me. If I wanted to be scammed out of all my money, 599 00:38:45,827 --> 00:38:48,287 I'd go the old-fashioned route and become obsessively religious. 600 00:38:48,288 --> 00:38:49,830 Cheers to that. 601 00:38:49,831 --> 00:38:53,250 Well, if it isn't Beauty and the Stink! 602 00:38:53,251 --> 00:38:54,836 Get out! Sassy! 603 00:38:55,670 --> 00:38:57,756 Oh, my God! 604 00:38:59,758 --> 00:39:01,300 Hey, ladies. 605 00:39:01,301 --> 00:39:03,510 - Hi. - Welcome to Ola's. 606 00:39:03,511 --> 00:39:06,472 - I'm so happy to see all of you. - Thanks for having us, Sam. 607 00:39:06,473 --> 00:39:09,058 No, thank you for coming. Please, make sure you enjoy yourselves, okay? 608 00:39:09,059 --> 00:39:11,143 - Absolutely. Thanks. - Cheers! 609 00:39:11,144 --> 00:39:12,229 Thank you. 610 00:39:15,065 --> 00:39:16,066 You are such a twat. 611 00:39:16,650 --> 00:39:19,985 - Oi. What can I get you to drink? - Champagne, please. 612 00:39:19,986 --> 00:39:21,946 Champagne? Can we get another champagne? 613 00:39:21,947 --> 00:39:23,406 Is Ted here? 614 00:39:24,324 --> 00:39:25,367 Told you. 615 00:39:26,576 --> 00:39:27,744 You want a beer, Coach? 616 00:39:28,828 --> 00:39:31,831 Michelle and Henry went horseback riding with Dr. Jacob today. 617 00:39:32,415 --> 00:39:35,417 We'll take two shots of whiskey. A single and a double. 618 00:39:35,418 --> 00:39:37,379 A triple. Two. 619 00:39:38,255 --> 00:39:39,673 Weinstein's cock! 620 00:39:40,507 --> 00:39:41,674 Are you cheating on me? 621 00:39:41,675 --> 00:39:42,759 Yeah, I am. 622 00:39:43,468 --> 00:39:44,468 With you. 623 00:39:48,890 --> 00:39:51,643 Man, y'all's baggage just matches right up, don't it? 624 00:40:00,443 --> 00:40:01,444 See you in a bit. 625 00:40:05,657 --> 00:40:06,992 What the fuck do you want? 626 00:40:10,579 --> 00:40:15,625 You frowning while we're on a win streak, that's a bad look. 627 00:40:16,376 --> 00:40:17,918 You frowned your whole career. 628 00:40:17,919 --> 00:40:19,796 No, I never smiled. That's different. 629 00:40:23,341 --> 00:40:24,341 Here we go. 630 00:40:27,262 --> 00:40:29,972 - Good game. Good game. - Yes. 631 00:40:29,973 --> 00:40:31,266 For fuck's sake. 632 00:40:31,975 --> 00:40:34,728 There he is, God's gift to those who have everything. 633 00:40:35,312 --> 00:40:36,812 Best player on the team. 634 00:40:36,813 --> 00:40:37,898 Fuck off. 635 00:40:39,399 --> 00:40:40,400 It's true. 636 00:40:40,984 --> 00:40:45,155 You used to be the best. Now you're not. It happens. 637 00:40:45,739 --> 00:40:46,823 You thought I was the best? 638 00:40:47,657 --> 00:40:51,411 Yeah. I mean, you still could be if you weren't such a pre-Madonna. 639 00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:54,414 - Did you just call me a pre-Madonna? - Yeah. 640 00:40:55,999 --> 00:40:57,542 It's prima donna. 641 00:40:58,543 --> 00:41:01,962 Who the fuck says "pre-Madonna"? What the fuck does that even mean? 642 00:41:01,963 --> 00:41:05,716 It means before Madonna, female vocalists didn't have to work that hard. 643 00:41:05,717 --> 00:41:07,259 Are you mad? 644 00:41:07,260 --> 00:41:09,720 You never heard of Tina Turner? Fucking Stevie Nicks? 645 00:41:09,721 --> 00:41:12,474 Fuck you. Point is, he's the best player on the team. 646 00:41:13,058 --> 00:41:15,768 And right now, all you gotta do is try and keep up with him. 647 00:41:15,769 --> 00:41:18,313 Fuck that. I don't wanna just keep up with him. 648 00:41:19,689 --> 00:41:21,483 I wanna be better than him. 649 00:41:25,195 --> 00:41:26,238 I could train you. 650 00:41:28,323 --> 00:41:29,950 But only if you fucking mean it. 651 00:41:30,450 --> 00:41:33,453 Yeah. I do mean it. 652 00:41:37,207 --> 00:41:38,208 When do we start then? 653 00:41:39,709 --> 00:41:40,919 Right fucking now. 654 00:41:41,753 --> 00:41:42,921 Come on, man. 655 00:41:43,505 --> 00:41:45,632 So sorry. We'll take care of it. 656 00:41:48,093 --> 00:41:50,095 We start tomorrow. 4:00 a.m. 657 00:41:52,222 --> 00:41:53,557 Clean that up. 658 00:41:57,519 --> 00:41:58,519 All right. 659 00:42:00,355 --> 00:42:02,481 I'm gonna do a lap. If Ted's already gone, 660 00:42:02,482 --> 00:42:05,402 I'm telling you right now, I will be attempting to scale Mount Zava. 661 00:42:06,152 --> 00:42:07,278 Adieu. 662 00:42:07,279 --> 00:42:08,405 Adieu. Good luck. 663 00:42:10,907 --> 00:42:13,617 Hi. Hello. Hi. 664 00:42:13,618 --> 00:42:15,244 Hi. Hello. 665 00:42:15,245 --> 00:42:17,955 I'm Shandy. I do PR for the club. 666 00:42:17,956 --> 00:42:20,916 It's so great you've come down here, but don't be a dick. 667 00:42:20,917 --> 00:42:22,878 Show some love on your socials, yeah? 668 00:42:24,170 --> 00:42:28,091 I like your confident energy. It's off-putting. 669 00:42:28,925 --> 00:42:30,635 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 670 00:42:31,428 --> 00:42:32,721 That's really nice. 671 00:42:33,305 --> 00:42:35,514 So how's it going with Shandy? Is she fitting in? 672 00:42:35,515 --> 00:42:38,393 Yes, she's great. I love how not shy she is. 673 00:42:40,228 --> 00:42:41,228 Yeah. 674 00:42:50,238 --> 00:42:51,239 Wish me luck. 675 00:42:57,871 --> 00:42:59,372 Okay. See you later. 676 00:43:12,886 --> 00:43:16,598 Oi. There are better things ahead than any we leave behind. 677 00:43:23,855 --> 00:43:24,981 Excuse me. One moment. 678 00:43:25,523 --> 00:43:27,024 Hey, hey. 679 00:43:27,025 --> 00:43:29,693 Thank you so much for coming. Honestly, it means so much to me. 680 00:43:29,694 --> 00:43:33,782 Sam, tell me, where does your restaurant source its avocados from? 681 00:43:34,783 --> 00:43:38,495 West African cuisine doesn't typically feature a lot of avocados. 682 00:43:39,621 --> 00:43:40,621 Not yet. 683 00:43:45,835 --> 00:43:48,254 - Marlboro Man. - Hey. Look who it is. 684 00:43:48,255 --> 00:43:50,047 I didn't know you work here. 685 00:43:50,048 --> 00:43:52,132 Well, how you going? 686 00:43:52,133 --> 00:43:53,842 - I'm doing all right. Yeah. - Yeah? 687 00:43:53,843 --> 00:43:56,470 Well, my ex-wife's dating our ex-marriage counselor, 688 00:43:56,471 --> 00:43:58,515 so, you know, that's new. 689 00:43:59,224 --> 00:44:01,892 Wow, that's borderline unethical. 690 00:44:01,893 --> 00:44:05,479 Yeah, well, I mean, it all started a year and a half after we were seeing him, 691 00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:08,983 so I guess that's... You ever have anything like that happen with you and a client? 692 00:44:08,984 --> 00:44:10,818 Ted, I'm a child psychologist. 693 00:44:10,819 --> 00:44:12,695 Right, right. 694 00:44:12,696 --> 00:44:13,779 So, yes. Twice. 695 00:44:13,780 --> 00:44:16,699 Hey. Classic Sassy. I love it. 696 00:44:16,700 --> 00:44:18,868 - Classic Sass. - Classic Sassy. 697 00:44:19,452 --> 00:44:20,537 I got you a surprise. 698 00:44:24,749 --> 00:44:25,750 What's this? 699 00:44:30,171 --> 00:44:31,172 Thank you. 700 00:44:32,090 --> 00:44:33,549 Oh, my God. 701 00:44:33,550 --> 00:44:35,176 Don't just stand there. Pass them out. 702 00:44:40,724 --> 00:44:41,725 Hey. 703 00:44:46,771 --> 00:44:48,982 - What? - You're being really clingy right now. 704 00:44:49,900 --> 00:44:50,901 I am so sorry. 705 00:44:51,818 --> 00:44:52,985 Hey. 706 00:44:52,986 --> 00:44:56,030 Ladies, a little something to commemorate the evening 707 00:44:56,031 --> 00:44:58,741 and to remind you to come back again and again, right? 708 00:44:58,742 --> 00:44:59,992 Thank you. 709 00:44:59,993 --> 00:45:01,119 No worries. 710 00:45:02,662 --> 00:45:03,662 So chic. 711 00:45:07,792 --> 00:45:08,793 Green. 712 00:45:13,173 --> 00:45:14,591 It's a green matchbook. 713 00:45:17,093 --> 00:45:18,094 You okay? 714 00:45:22,140 --> 00:45:25,769 - Yes. Another round? - All right. Yeah. Okay. 715 00:45:27,312 --> 00:45:29,564 - Get another round. - Can we get another round, please? 716 00:45:30,523 --> 00:45:31,941 - Thank you, Sam. - No worries. 717 00:45:31,942 --> 00:45:33,108 This place is wonderful. 718 00:45:33,109 --> 00:45:34,944 - Food's fantastic. - Thank you so much for coming. 719 00:45:34,945 --> 00:45:36,665 - Okay, listen, get home safe, okay? - Okay.