1 00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:18,349 [Nikki] Okay, so today is important. And we have to make a good impression. 2 00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:19,725 So, you know... 3 00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:22,605 -What? -Maybe just don't do your jokes. 4 00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:25,279 What do you mean? People like it. It's disarming. 5 00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:29,779 It's not, Jason. It's arming. It's very, very arming. 6 00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:30,993 Don't be daft. 7 00:00:32,198 --> 00:00:34,328 "Therapeutic reparenting." 8 00:00:34,409 --> 00:00:38,039 Well, we didn't exactly nail babysitting, so maybe we need this. 9 00:00:38,121 --> 00:00:40,461 "Healing and growing together." 10 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:43,341 When I was learning to ride a bike, my dad taped both of my feet to the pedals 11 00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:44,668 and said, "If you stop, you crash." 12 00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:47,463 Yeah, we're gonna need to channel out that bit of your personality for today. 13 00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:49,678 -What bit? -The bit that makes you roll your eyes 14 00:00:49,758 --> 00:00:51,298 when you hear something therapy-y. 15 00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:52,925 -I don't do that. -You do. 16 00:00:53,011 --> 00:00:55,431 And I know you think you're this straight-shooting, 17 00:00:55,514 --> 00:00:57,474 just "tell it as it is" guy, 18 00:00:57,558 --> 00:01:00,598 but sometimes it does veer into grumpy old man. 19 00:01:01,687 --> 00:01:03,307 -Hiya, you all right? Hi. -Hi, how you doing? 20 00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:04,727 Are you being serious? 21 00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:06,527 "The modern world." 22 00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:08,938 "Why are there so many different bins now?" 23 00:01:09,027 --> 00:01:11,277 "When did police sirens get so loud?" 24 00:01:11,363 --> 00:01:13,413 "Why does no one know how to read maps anymore?" 25 00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:17,330 I stand by all of that. Bins are out of control. 26 00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:19,081 Hiya, you all right? Hi. 27 00:01:25,961 --> 00:01:27,551 -Hello. -All right? 28 00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:30,669 -I've come for your precious item. -Oh, yeah, of course. 29 00:01:30,757 --> 00:01:32,337 It's a little exercise to remind us 30 00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:34,466 how hard it is to lose something we're attached to. 31 00:01:34,553 --> 00:01:35,603 Okay. 32 00:01:37,723 --> 00:01:40,023 -Elvis Costello. -Oh, yes. 33 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:41,890 -It's signed. -Yes, in it goes. 34 00:01:41,977 --> 00:01:43,097 -Okay. -Thank you. 35 00:01:44,688 --> 00:01:46,228 So, how do you feel? 36 00:01:46,315 --> 00:01:48,605 -Fine. You all right? -Not upset at all? 37 00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:50,900 No, no. 38 00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,985 Would you say you have a problem making attachments? 39 00:01:54,406 --> 00:01:57,446 Oh, no. No, I just know you're gonna give it back. 40 00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:59,914 We like you to try and imagine it's being thrown away. 41 00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:03,455 But it's obviously not though, is it? Denise just put her diabetes medicine in. 42 00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:05,630 I mean, no offense. It's just not really realistic, is it? 43 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:08,499 -Like I say, it's just a little exercise. -Okay. 44 00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:10,296 -Okay? -Cool, cool. 45 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:14,341 Hello. I've come for your precious items. 46 00:02:14,426 --> 00:02:15,426 What? 47 00:02:33,403 --> 00:02:36,113 -Okay! -[crowd chattering] 48 00:02:36,198 --> 00:02:40,658 Welcome, friends, to the first of your mandatory adoption training classes. 49 00:02:40,744 --> 00:02:44,674 Right off the top, I wanna say thank you for making the decision to adopt. 50 00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:46,915 It's the greatest thing you'll ever do. 51 00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:50,963 Okay, so let's start by looking at the sorts of issues 52 00:02:51,046 --> 00:02:55,126 you'll likely be dealing with, including, but not limited to: 53 00:02:55,217 --> 00:02:58,797 reactive attachment disorder, disinhibited attachment disorder, 54 00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:01,427 attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, 55 00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:03,595 pervasive developmental disorder, 56 00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:05,644 post-traumatic stress disorder, 57 00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:08,147 neglect, fetal alcohol syndrome, 58 00:03:08,230 --> 00:03:10,480 generalized anxiety disorder, 59 00:03:10,566 --> 00:03:11,816 conduct disorder, 60 00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,700 and severe emotional trauma. 61 00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:20,450 But first, a few words from Christine on oppositional defiant disorder. 62 00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:24,158 [scattered applause] 63 00:03:24,246 --> 00:03:25,246 Hi. 64 00:03:25,998 --> 00:03:30,958 So, it was on the... third day 65 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:35,344 when my son hit me for the first time. [chuckles] 66 00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:46,024 And is there anything you'd like to say to Kwame, Luke? 67 00:03:48,103 --> 00:03:51,573 I suppose I want him to know that I hear him. 68 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:54,778 Then why don't you tell him? He's right there. 69 00:03:57,279 --> 00:03:58,569 I hear you. 70 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:03,286 -And I hear you. -That's all I've ever wanted. 71 00:04:04,620 --> 00:04:05,790 I love you. 72 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,747 I love you too. 73 00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:14,344 -[Denise] That's so nice. -[Marcus] So lovely. 74 00:04:14,796 --> 00:04:18,426 And that's what you get when you meet fear with love. 75 00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:21,804 The magic happens. Well done, guys. Brilliant. 76 00:04:21,887 --> 00:04:24,307 Okay, Nikki and Jason, let's get on up here. 77 00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:27,429 -Bloody hell. Look out. -Lizzie, hit us. 78 00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:31,558 "Your son has been sent home from school for punching another boy in the face. 79 00:04:31,647 --> 00:04:33,977 How would you talk to him about the incident?" 80 00:04:34,066 --> 00:04:35,226 Okay, let's jump in. 81 00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:37,112 Love a bit of role play. 82 00:04:37,194 --> 00:04:38,204 Are we getting chairs? 83 00:04:39,363 --> 00:04:41,203 Shall I get a-- Shall I get a chair, Lloyd? 84 00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:43,577 Lloyd, I'll stand up. 85 00:04:49,331 --> 00:04:51,081 -Okay, honey-- -Piss off. 86 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:52,166 Oi, not acceptable. 87 00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:55,086 What? Was that-- 88 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,760 So when you come in hard, there's nowhere to go. 89 00:04:57,840 --> 00:04:59,760 -So, moderate. -Okay. 90 00:05:00,217 --> 00:05:02,257 -You mustn't hit other kids, mate. -No, so-- Hold on. Sorry. 91 00:05:02,344 --> 00:05:04,934 So, we're just automatically believing the other kid? 92 00:05:05,013 --> 00:05:07,683 -Lizzie just said it on her little-- -Kids lie. He probably didn't even do it. 93 00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:08,926 -Did you do it? -No! 94 00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:11,227 Well, he's just saying that 'cause you said he didn't, but... 95 00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,021 Okay, why don't you-- 96 00:05:15,899 --> 00:05:18,689 -Okay, why don't we talk-- -Piss off, you're not my real dad. 97 00:05:18,777 --> 00:05:20,817 -Okay, that seems a bit-- -Remember your emotional pathways. 98 00:05:20,904 --> 00:05:22,614 -Right, okay. Let's just-- -Piss off! 99 00:05:22,698 --> 00:05:25,028 -Oi! -Don't raise your voice. You'll scare him. 100 00:05:25,117 --> 00:05:27,287 -It seems like he can handle himself. -He clearly feels stressed. 101 00:05:27,369 --> 00:05:28,749 Yeah, well, I'm not super relaxed. 102 00:05:29,580 --> 00:05:30,620 [Lloyd] Go on. 103 00:05:32,958 --> 00:05:36,038 Everything's gonna be okay. We love you. 104 00:05:36,128 --> 00:05:38,758 You're safe here, and you're not going anywhere. 105 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:41,929 That's good. Maintain that relationship. Show me the love. 106 00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:47,263 Why don't we have a cookie, and we can chat about why you did that thing? 107 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,767 Maybe because every time he does it, you give him a cookie? 108 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:52,230 -[Zareen] Punishing isn't teaching. -No, it isn't. 109 00:05:52,311 --> 00:05:54,061 Yeah, but if he's punched someone, then... 110 00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:56,725 -Go on. No, it's all right. -No, go on. Please. 111 00:05:56,815 --> 00:06:00,485 Well, look, I get that these kids have had a rough time, right? 112 00:06:00,569 --> 00:06:03,529 But if we'd done something wrong as kids, then we'd be punished for it, wouldn't we? 113 00:06:03,614 --> 00:06:05,824 So, are we helping him by treating him any differently? 114 00:06:05,908 --> 00:06:08,328 -These kids are different. -I know. 115 00:06:08,410 --> 00:06:10,160 But when we mess up as adults, 116 00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:14,625 we don't get offered a healing circle thing, do we? 117 00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:18,213 Life is tough. Shouldn't we prepare 'em for that? 118 00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:25,223 -Have you ever had your heart broken? -Yeah, but I mean... 119 00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:29,557 Try it when you're two. 120 00:06:30,516 --> 00:06:33,056 The hardest thing that's ever gonna happen to these kids 121 00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:35,313 happened before they learned to talk. 122 00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,805 Trust me, they know how tough life is. 123 00:06:39,024 --> 00:06:40,784 What they need is love. 124 00:06:42,361 --> 00:06:44,151 -[inaudible] -Is that it? 125 00:06:44,238 --> 00:06:47,068 Okay. So, who's next? 126 00:06:47,157 --> 00:06:49,867 Jamie and Zareen, get on with me. 127 00:06:49,952 --> 00:06:52,332 -Okay, Luke, hit us. -Hey, what are you doing? It's d-- 128 00:06:53,121 --> 00:06:55,671 "Your child is in the middle of a video game. 129 00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:58,669 You tell them it's time for bed, but they ignore you. 130 00:06:58,752 --> 00:07:00,052 What will you do?" 131 00:07:01,547 --> 00:07:03,507 -Now, look-- -Piss off! 132 00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:05,878 What did I say? 133 00:07:06,593 --> 00:07:09,473 -I know. I'm sorry. -We're being assessed the whole time. 134 00:07:09,847 --> 00:07:12,557 -I know. -Try and be a bit more sensitive 135 00:07:12,641 --> 00:07:15,891 and a bit less talk bloody radio. 136 00:07:15,978 --> 00:07:19,228 All right. Okay, can we just make sure that we sit together because... 137 00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:21,284 [Nikki] Hiya. Do you mind if I sit here? 138 00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:27,655 This buffet's amazing. There's half-baguettes up there. 139 00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:30,908 Lloyd's fit, isn't he? 140 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:34,872 -Yeah? -Yeah, I know what you mean. 141 00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:38,165 I think it's 'cause he cares. Like, compassion's so hot. 142 00:07:39,001 --> 00:07:41,801 He's the kinda guy that makes you never want to eat bread again. 143 00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:48,304 I was wondering, can we all keep in touch after this? 144 00:07:48,385 --> 00:07:49,595 -Is that weird? -No. 145 00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:51,808 It'd be nice to have someone there who's going through it all. 146 00:07:51,889 --> 00:07:53,809 -Of course. -Everyone I know is having their own kids, 147 00:07:53,891 --> 00:07:56,141 and they don't really get it, you know? 148 00:07:56,226 --> 00:07:58,646 Last week, someone asked me how much the kid was gonna cost. 149 00:07:58,729 --> 00:08:01,649 -Oh, my God. What did you say? -I said ten grand. 150 00:08:02,357 --> 00:08:05,437 Might start a crowdfunding page. Go to the Algarve. 151 00:08:05,527 --> 00:08:06,527 Yeah, all right. 152 00:08:07,112 --> 00:08:10,532 You don't think it's as bad as all that, do you? All that stuff about the kids. 153 00:08:10,616 --> 00:08:14,366 No, they're just giving us a worst-case scenario, I think. 154 00:08:14,453 --> 00:08:16,123 [scoffs] 155 00:08:16,205 --> 00:08:18,995 Sorry. You're right. It's not as bad as that. 156 00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:20,332 -Oh. -Yeah. 157 00:08:20,751 --> 00:08:22,501 -It's much worse. -Mmm? 158 00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:25,710 I've sort of withdrawn from the new parents I know. 159 00:08:25,797 --> 00:08:28,877 -I mean, I love them. -You got the friend-vy. It's a thing. 160 00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:31,177 Yeah. And, oh, my God, the photos. 161 00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:33,261 It's like, I know what your baby looks like. 162 00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:35,177 It looks like a baby. I don't need to come over. 163 00:08:35,265 --> 00:08:37,305 I'll imagine a baby. It will look like that. 164 00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:39,522 And when they tell you to support the neck, and I'm like, 165 00:08:39,602 --> 00:08:41,562 [chuckles] "I know you have to support the neck. 166 00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:43,267 Everyone knows you have to support the neck." 167 00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:45,727 Yeah. I mean, I think we can stop saying that now. 168 00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:49,027 I'm fortunate, though, 'cause I've got my sister, 169 00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:51,912 and I can relate to her 'cause she's had bad luck with kids. 170 00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:53,490 -Oh, sorry. -Oh, okay. 171 00:08:53,575 --> 00:08:56,785 No, I mean, she's got some. They're just all awful. 172 00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:03,631 We adopted a five-year-old. Six months later, we had to give him back. 173 00:09:04,086 --> 00:09:06,046 -Why? What happened? -Just wouldn't attach. 174 00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:09,049 Verbal abuse from day one, physical not long after. 175 00:09:09,132 --> 00:09:10,972 Neighbors called the police in the end. 176 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:13,551 I said, "I need to report a missing person. 177 00:09:13,637 --> 00:09:15,347 I haven't seen the social worker in six months." 178 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:18,060 Sorry. So, why are you doing it again? 179 00:09:18,976 --> 00:09:23,726 "Let us not become weary in doing good, for we shall reap a harvest." 180 00:09:23,814 --> 00:09:24,824 Galatians. 181 00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:28,442 I couldn't do any of this if Jesus wasn't by my side. 182 00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:34,663 Doesn't really sound like he is. 183 00:09:42,374 --> 00:09:45,884 I mean, I hear all that stuff, and I'm scared to adopt one. 184 00:09:45,961 --> 00:09:49,341 -She hears it, she wants to adopt two. -Mate, it's a scary business. 185 00:09:49,423 --> 00:09:52,013 You never feel less capable than when you're holding your own child. 186 00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:53,342 But you don't regret having kids? 187 00:09:54,595 --> 00:09:58,265 My kids are... tiny little vampires 188 00:09:58,348 --> 00:10:01,478 that suck every ounce of energy, spark and drive out of me 189 00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:03,980 until I'm nothing but an empty gray carcass. 190 00:10:04,646 --> 00:10:07,106 -Good pep talk. -You know, I have this fantasy. 191 00:10:08,025 --> 00:10:10,935 I'm out walking one day, and I get stabbed. 192 00:10:11,028 --> 00:10:15,368 Lower lateral quadrant of the abdomen. Serious, but not fatal. 193 00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:18,539 And then I just get left to recover in hospital for months. 194 00:10:18,619 --> 00:10:21,869 In a paradise where no one expects anything from me. 195 00:10:23,165 --> 00:10:25,625 -But other than that, you're all right? -Yeah. 196 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:42,940 Sorry. 197 00:10:43,018 --> 00:10:45,228 He put a pattern in your coffee. I told him not to. 198 00:10:46,104 --> 00:10:47,114 Okay. 199 00:10:47,189 --> 00:10:50,689 -So, there's something I need to tell you. -Mmm? 200 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:52,740 I'm getting engaged. 201 00:10:53,487 --> 00:10:56,947 Oh, my God! Karen! 202 00:10:57,032 --> 00:11:00,202 Oh, that's amazing! To who? 203 00:11:01,078 --> 00:11:04,038 -Scott. -Scott? 204 00:11:05,707 --> 00:11:08,667 Yeah. No, of course. Sorry. 205 00:11:08,752 --> 00:11:11,172 -What do you mean, "to who"? -No, I wasn't concentrating. 206 00:11:12,047 --> 00:11:16,217 Oh. That's great. Kaz, I'm so pleased. 207 00:11:16,301 --> 00:11:18,721 -Scott. -Thank you. 208 00:11:19,555 --> 00:11:21,425 So, how did he propose? 209 00:11:21,515 --> 00:11:26,805 Well, we just sort of talked it through and realized the pros outweigh the cons. 210 00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:28,814 Cool. 211 00:11:29,439 --> 00:11:32,069 -So, has he picked a ring yet? -No. 212 00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:34,650 He says I might as well get it 'cause I know what I want. 213 00:11:34,736 --> 00:11:36,316 And that way, I know I like it. 214 00:11:36,405 --> 00:11:40,235 -Yeah, right. That makes sense. -Hmm. 215 00:11:41,869 --> 00:11:42,869 Scott. 216 00:11:42,953 --> 00:11:44,293 -Scott. -Scott, yeah. 217 00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:49,291 Oh, for God's sake. 218 00:11:49,835 --> 00:11:53,125 Why is everyone so attractive now? People didn't used to be this attractive. 219 00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:55,133 They're the same. You're just getting older. 220 00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:58,385 I used to love looking at attractive women. Now it's just painful. 221 00:11:58,468 --> 00:12:00,348 It's not real though, is it? It's like an advert. 222 00:12:00,429 --> 00:12:03,099 So, you're essentially falling in love with an advert. 223 00:12:08,979 --> 00:12:10,519 I slept with someone. 224 00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:12,440 What? 225 00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:16,896 -Who? -Someone from work. 226 00:12:16,987 --> 00:12:18,947 She's new. She's American. 227 00:12:19,031 --> 00:12:21,331 -What, that one I met at the thing? -Harper, yeah. 228 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:22,658 -How old is she? -She's 24. 229 00:12:22,743 --> 00:12:26,043 -Jesus, Freddy. -Yes, she's an old 24 though. 230 00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:29,171 She's, you know, really present. Mentally, she's comfortably early 30s. 231 00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:30,419 -Well, is it over? -Yes. 232 00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:35,260 -Basically. -Jesus, Freddy. 233 00:12:35,339 --> 00:12:37,929 Yeah, but she's got really clingy. She keeps calling and texting. 234 00:12:38,008 --> 00:12:39,758 She hasn't developed object permanence yet, has she? 235 00:12:39,843 --> 00:12:41,223 She probably panics when you leave. 236 00:12:41,303 --> 00:12:42,973 What were you thinking, mate? What about Erica? 237 00:12:43,055 --> 00:12:44,095 Erica? 238 00:12:45,182 --> 00:12:47,682 Most of the time it's like she doesn't even like me anymore. 239 00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:49,438 Get used to that feeling, mate. 240 00:12:51,605 --> 00:12:52,855 You have no idea. 241 00:12:53,774 --> 00:12:56,114 You have no idea what it's like to have a family. 242 00:12:56,193 --> 00:12:59,613 You know, the things that I do. The things that I have to hold together. 243 00:12:59,696 --> 00:13:02,116 Look, you don't even have a family, yet you're thinking of bailing. 244 00:13:02,199 --> 00:13:04,369 -No, I'm not. -Uh, okay. 245 00:13:04,451 --> 00:13:07,121 -Uh, no, I'm not. -Okay, relax. 246 00:13:07,746 --> 00:13:09,286 I'm not wearing a wire. 247 00:13:12,417 --> 00:13:14,997 Just think very hard. That's all I'm saying. 248 00:13:15,087 --> 00:13:16,297 'Cause this stuff, 249 00:13:16,380 --> 00:13:19,510 it's when you find out what sort of a person you really are. 250 00:13:21,093 --> 00:13:23,103 Sometimes it's better not to know. 251 00:13:42,239 --> 00:13:44,409 Should go through this training stuff together. 252 00:13:46,368 --> 00:13:50,368 There's a whole section on what type of disability we'd be happy with. 253 00:13:50,455 --> 00:13:53,165 -Well, not-- not happy with. -I was thinking maybe we could 254 00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:55,880 just have the night off. Take a bit of a breather. 255 00:13:55,961 --> 00:13:57,251 -Take a breather? -Yeah. 256 00:13:58,255 --> 00:14:00,835 Oh, okay. You mean, not for tonight? 257 00:14:00,924 --> 00:14:01,934 Yeah. 258 00:14:03,802 --> 00:14:06,352 -Or, you know, just a general breather. -[sighs] 259 00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:08,427 Are you serious? 260 00:14:11,560 --> 00:14:12,980 What's the matter? 261 00:14:13,061 --> 00:14:15,111 -Nothing. Nothing. -What's going on? Jason. 262 00:14:15,189 --> 00:14:16,859 I'm... 263 00:14:16,940 --> 00:14:18,650 It's late, all right? I don't want to get into this now. 264 00:14:18,734 --> 00:14:19,744 -It's late. -Okay. I do. 265 00:14:19,818 --> 00:14:20,898 Okay. 266 00:14:22,029 --> 00:14:23,279 Okay. 267 00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:30,947 I don't think it's the worst idea if we were to slow down a little bit, all right? 268 00:14:31,038 --> 00:14:32,748 -Why? -Because it feels like something 269 00:14:32,831 --> 00:14:36,791 -we really, really need to think about. -Yeah, we have thought about it. 270 00:14:36,877 --> 00:14:39,837 'Cause it's going to affect every aspect of the rest of our lives, Nikki. 271 00:14:39,922 --> 00:14:41,342 Yeah, and we decided to do it. 272 00:14:41,423 --> 00:14:44,893 You convinced me to do it. It took a lot for me to do this. 273 00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:46,008 Me too. 274 00:14:47,763 --> 00:14:50,143 This last year didn't just happen to you. 275 00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:52,179 It happened to me as well. 276 00:14:54,811 --> 00:14:58,401 All right. Is this about the kids? Because we knew the issues. 277 00:14:58,482 --> 00:15:01,572 We knew the issues, but when you actually speak to someone who's going through it-- 278 00:15:01,652 --> 00:15:03,992 You know, so many people adopt, and it's fine. 279 00:15:04,071 --> 00:15:07,161 -You got the social workers telling us-- -They have to say things like that. 280 00:15:07,241 --> 00:15:09,331 It's for legal reasons, Jase. 281 00:15:09,910 --> 00:15:12,410 You know, it's a "may contain nuts" type thing. 282 00:15:12,496 --> 00:15:14,406 Yeah. But what if it isn't? You got kids here addicted to drugs. 283 00:15:14,498 --> 00:15:16,788 -They got alcohol dependency-- -Oh, God. So what? 284 00:15:16,875 --> 00:15:18,705 -I mean, so do we, basically. -I'm being serious now. 285 00:15:18,794 --> 00:15:20,594 -Jase, so am I. -Please don't joke about this. 286 00:15:20,671 --> 00:15:23,301 I can't believe you're freaking out on me. 287 00:15:24,174 --> 00:15:25,764 You're not the one who freaks out. 288 00:15:25,843 --> 00:15:28,143 I'm the one who freaks out, and for once, I'm managing not to. 289 00:15:28,220 --> 00:15:30,640 There you go. That's it. Own it. That's it. 290 00:15:32,516 --> 00:15:36,016 You're afraid of everything, so I'm not allowed to be afraid of anything. 291 00:15:36,103 --> 00:15:38,903 We talked about it. We agreed to do it. Why did you agree to it? 292 00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:41,111 Because I wanted to make you happy. 293 00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:43,899 And I knew this would make you happy. 294 00:15:43,986 --> 00:15:49,446 And I really, really, really want to make you happy. 295 00:15:51,285 --> 00:15:54,535 -But this is a huge sacrifice. -Yeah. 296 00:15:55,789 --> 00:15:59,499 That's what helping people is. It is sacrificing. 297 00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:05,511 Do you know who doesn't make sacrifices? Arseholes, Jason. 298 00:16:05,591 --> 00:16:07,681 Arseholes and children. Which one are you? 299 00:16:14,141 --> 00:16:15,351 [door slams] 300 00:16:37,956 --> 00:16:38,956 Shit. 301 00:16:50,385 --> 00:16:53,215 -Alisha, are you leaving? -College in Geneva. 302 00:16:53,305 --> 00:16:56,345 Oh, wow. Well, well done. I mean, it won't be the same without you. 303 00:16:56,433 --> 00:16:57,433 -Don't do that. -Okay. 304 00:16:57,518 --> 00:16:59,308 So, do you want it? 305 00:16:59,394 --> 00:17:00,814 -Do I want what? -The job. 306 00:17:00,896 --> 00:17:02,646 I could recommend you. You'd get it. 307 00:17:02,731 --> 00:17:06,441 Nah. No. I mean, it seems awful, so... 308 00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:08,437 Think about it. It's more money. 309 00:17:10,989 --> 00:17:12,529 Coming to the park? 310 00:17:12,616 --> 00:17:13,736 Uh... 311 00:17:13,825 --> 00:17:16,155 Everyone's going: students, tutors. 312 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:20,459 -Oh, no, I can't really. I've got a... -Okay, it's fine. 313 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:23,880 Thank you. Oh-- Um, excuse me. Is this yours? 314 00:17:23,961 --> 00:17:26,551 -Oh, yes! -It was in the... 315 00:17:26,630 --> 00:17:28,210 -Wow. Thank you. -It's all right. 316 00:17:29,007 --> 00:17:30,217 -Okay. All right. -Okay. 317 00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:31,720 -See you. -See you. 318 00:17:34,680 --> 00:17:36,100 Do you know what? I will come. 319 00:17:36,557 --> 00:17:39,137 -Oh, great. -Yeah. Uh... 320 00:17:39,810 --> 00:17:41,310 Can you wait a minute? 321 00:17:41,395 --> 00:17:42,765 -Sure. -All right. 322 00:17:52,281 --> 00:17:54,121 [chattering] 323 00:17:56,660 --> 00:17:57,870 Yeah. Yes. 324 00:17:57,953 --> 00:18:00,253 What's up, guys? How's it going? Just... 325 00:18:02,332 --> 00:18:03,582 -Thanks very much. Thank you. -Thank you. 326 00:18:03,667 --> 00:18:04,957 What are we celebrating? 327 00:18:06,003 --> 00:18:08,553 Life, brother. Life. 328 00:18:08,630 --> 00:18:10,050 -Well, cheers, brother. -Cheers. 329 00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:11,552 -Thank you. -Thank you. 330 00:18:11,842 --> 00:18:13,012 [phone dings] 331 00:18:15,012 --> 00:18:16,722 [sighs] 332 00:18:18,515 --> 00:18:21,265 -So, how long have you worked here? -Me? 333 00:18:21,351 --> 00:18:22,351 -Um... -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 334 00:18:23,478 --> 00:18:27,188 Gosh, about... seven years. 335 00:18:27,274 --> 00:18:28,944 -Wow. -Yeah. 336 00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,199 Yeah, I thought people just did this for the summer. 337 00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:32,568 Not everyone, no. 338 00:18:33,030 --> 00:18:37,490 -And where are you from? -Oh, you know, 339 00:18:37,576 --> 00:18:43,166 I've traveled around so much that I don't really feel like I'm from anywhere. 340 00:18:43,248 --> 00:18:44,668 -Where were you born? -Norwich. 341 00:18:44,750 --> 00:18:45,750 You're from Norwich. 342 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:51,340 Look, I'm just trying to go everywhere and do everything, dude. Aren't you? 343 00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:52,880 I'm old. 344 00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:58,506 So, I can do about three things, and then I get really tired afterwards. 345 00:18:58,597 --> 00:19:00,717 Well, you better make sure they're the right things then. 346 00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:34,301 Why would you do something you don't wanna do? 347 00:19:34,383 --> 00:19:37,013 Because I'm a grown-up. Not as simple as that. 348 00:19:37,094 --> 00:19:41,564 It is though. You know what happiness is, ultimately? 349 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:42,680 Go on. 350 00:19:42,766 --> 00:19:44,426 -It's dopamine. Yeah. -Right. 351 00:19:44,518 --> 00:19:48,268 All human achievement gets converted into dopamine. 352 00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:50,975 So, if you climb a mountain, it's dopamine. 353 00:19:51,066 --> 00:19:53,396 -If you have sex, it's dopamine. -Yeah. 354 00:19:53,485 --> 00:19:55,945 Win the lottery, guess what? 355 00:19:56,029 --> 00:19:57,029 -[Sofia] Mmm? -It's dopamine. 356 00:19:57,114 --> 00:20:01,034 So, my thing is, why bother climbing a mountain 357 00:20:01,118 --> 00:20:04,448 when you can get your dopamine from one of these? 358 00:20:04,538 --> 00:20:07,368 -Oh, bloody hell. Okay. -It's just easier, isn't it? 359 00:20:07,457 --> 00:20:09,537 To hack your happiness. 360 00:20:10,878 --> 00:20:12,248 -Did you know... -What? 361 00:20:12,337 --> 00:20:16,877 ...that the same perfume smells differently on different people? 362 00:20:17,593 --> 00:20:20,893 Did you know that? I mean, think about it. That's amazing, right? 363 00:20:20,971 --> 00:20:23,431 -That is amazing. That is amazing, yeah. -Crazy. 364 00:20:26,059 --> 00:20:27,099 Aw. 365 00:20:27,186 --> 00:20:29,056 -I feel so close to you, man. -Yeah, me too. 366 00:20:30,898 --> 00:20:32,858 -Say if this is weird... -Go on. 367 00:20:32,941 --> 00:20:34,611 -...but I feel like when I die... -Yeah? 368 00:20:35,611 --> 00:20:38,241 -I wanna be buried with you, man. -I think that's a great idea. 369 00:20:38,322 --> 00:20:41,202 [Jonny] Right. Okay, come on. Let's go! Shirts versus skins! 370 00:20:41,283 --> 00:20:42,493 -What do you mean? -Jason, you're skins. 371 00:20:42,576 --> 00:20:44,446 -What? -Couple of skins and shirts. Come on. 372 00:20:44,536 --> 00:20:47,156 -What sport are we even-- -[Jonny] Come on. It's rounders, Jason. 373 00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:48,617 Come on. Let's go! 374 00:20:48,707 --> 00:20:50,957 -All right. -No shirts, yo. Come on. 375 00:20:51,585 --> 00:20:53,625 I-- Yeah, is everyone-- 376 00:20:57,049 --> 00:20:58,549 Do you know what? I haven't got any sun cream. 377 00:20:58,634 --> 00:21:00,434 So I'm quite fair-skinned, so I might-- 378 00:21:00,511 --> 00:21:02,261 I'll go shirts, if that-- Is that all right? 379 00:21:02,763 --> 00:21:04,223 -That's all right, man. Yeah. Yeah. -Yeah. Okay. 380 00:21:04,306 --> 00:21:08,136 -Whatever. Whatever suits you. -[applause] 381 00:21:09,478 --> 00:21:11,978 Come on, mate! Come on! 382 00:21:12,773 --> 00:21:15,153 [groans] Shit. 383 00:21:16,693 --> 00:21:18,033 Yeah, that's the hammy there. 384 00:21:18,654 --> 00:21:20,954 -Are you okay? -Yeah, I'm fine. I do it all the time. 385 00:21:21,031 --> 00:21:24,791 It's just-- I've just got to... just got to stretch it out. 386 00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:28,158 You should never trust a man in his 30s who's in shape, by the way. 387 00:21:28,247 --> 00:21:29,827 It just means he's got nothing else going on. 388 00:21:29,915 --> 00:21:31,745 [laughing] 389 00:21:34,545 --> 00:21:35,955 Probably take the weight off. 390 00:21:36,046 --> 00:21:37,296 [groans] 391 00:21:37,881 --> 00:21:40,051 Here. Wet your whis-tle. 392 00:21:40,133 --> 00:21:43,053 Very good. Thank you. It's, uh, "whistle." 393 00:21:44,304 --> 00:21:45,314 Whis-tle. 394 00:21:45,389 --> 00:21:47,429 Look at me. Whistle. 395 00:21:48,517 --> 00:21:50,017 Whistle. Yeah? 396 00:21:50,102 --> 00:21:51,902 -That's it. Perfect. -Yeah! 397 00:21:51,979 --> 00:21:53,359 [giggles] 398 00:21:54,231 --> 00:21:55,271 Cool. 399 00:21:55,941 --> 00:22:01,151 -So, you are having a nice time? -Ah, you're good kids. 400 00:22:03,866 --> 00:22:04,986 I'm not a kid. 401 00:22:09,621 --> 00:22:12,961 We're all going on somewhere if you, uh, want to come. 402 00:22:15,794 --> 00:22:16,804 You wanna come? 403 00:22:17,838 --> 00:22:19,208 Uh... 404 00:22:19,923 --> 00:22:21,053 [blows] 405 00:22:29,141 --> 00:22:32,981 [TV, indistinct] 406 00:22:33,061 --> 00:22:34,191 [door closes] 407 00:22:43,864 --> 00:22:46,834 Oh, shit. Sorry. 408 00:22:48,744 --> 00:22:50,754 This work thing, which went on and on and... 409 00:22:50,829 --> 00:22:52,079 Oh, that's okay. 410 00:22:53,207 --> 00:22:55,537 -Is everything all right? -Yeah, yeah, fine. 411 00:22:56,460 --> 00:22:57,880 -You? -Yeah. 412 00:23:07,930 --> 00:23:12,480 Bloody hell, Jase. Out the jar? Like a junkie? 413 00:23:27,074 --> 00:23:31,124 Okay, I just-- I wanted to say one thing, and I won't say anything else. 414 00:23:33,163 --> 00:23:39,003 I think that you think that you're not a good enough person to do this. 415 00:23:41,338 --> 00:23:43,128 But I wanted you to know that... 416 00:23:44,675 --> 00:23:45,715 you are. 417 00:23:47,928 --> 00:23:49,098 And... 418 00:23:50,973 --> 00:23:53,103 Okay, well-- No, that's it, actually. 419 00:23:53,642 --> 00:23:55,562 Probably didn't need to turn around to say that. 420 00:23:55,644 --> 00:23:57,774 That didn't take as long as I thought it would. 421 00:23:57,855 --> 00:23:58,935 I'm not... 422 00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:03,400 as good a person as you think. 423 00:24:05,779 --> 00:24:07,279 Well, I like you. 424 00:24:19,501 --> 00:24:20,881 I'm gonna have a shower. 425 00:24:22,129 --> 00:24:24,759 -Now? -Mmm. Yeah. Just feel like one. 426 00:24:30,179 --> 00:24:31,639 [grunts] 427 00:24:56,496 --> 00:24:57,956 [phone rings] 428 00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:57,600 [shower running]