1 00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:09,887 I can't think of anyone who'd make better parents than Nikki and Jason. 2 00:00:09,968 --> 00:00:11,848 They are just the nicest people in the world. 3 00:00:11,929 --> 00:00:13,809 Yeah, totally agree. Mm. 4 00:00:13,889 --> 00:00:15,769 Obviously, they'll be less nice when they have kids. 5 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,639 -Obviously. [chuckles] -[chuckles] 6 00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:20,226 Everyone is. I mean, anyone can be nice without kids, right? 7 00:00:20,312 --> 00:00:21,312 Yeah. [inhales] 8 00:00:21,396 --> 00:00:25,436 No, but really, they're just amazing people. Really, really amazing. 9 00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:28,736 Yeah. Yeah, and they're a great couple. Really strong, really resilient. 10 00:00:28,820 --> 00:00:31,240 Oh, my God. So strong, so resilient. 11 00:00:32,073 --> 00:00:34,243 The thing to remember with them is that they're very 12 00:00:34,326 --> 00:00:35,366 -strong. -Strong. 13 00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:38,460 -And resilient. -Resilient. 14 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:42,289 They're just really strong and resilient. 15 00:00:42,376 --> 00:00:45,246 Really strong, really resilient. 16 00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:51,757 When she told me she was adopting, I was like, "Bitch, this news is global." 17 00:00:51,844 --> 00:00:55,934 [chuckles] I mean, I would totally adopt. Having a baby is gross. 18 00:00:56,014 --> 00:00:57,724 I mean, what if it looks like the dad? 19 00:00:57,808 --> 00:00:59,518 Then when you're having sex with your husband, 20 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,901 it's like having sex with someone that looks like your son. 21 00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:04,359 I mean, that is just grim. 22 00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:11,738 I mean, they're just really strong and resilient. 23 00:01:29,548 --> 00:01:32,088 Okay. So there's wipes and drinks in there. 24 00:01:32,176 --> 00:01:33,836 I've got a new number, so I wrote it down for you. 25 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:36,097 -Yeah, no. We'll be fine. -Thanks for doing this. 26 00:01:36,180 --> 00:01:38,640 No, we need the practice. We're so flattered that you'd ask us. 27 00:01:38,724 --> 00:01:41,774 Oh, no, totally. It's just childcare is crazy expensive, so... 28 00:01:43,228 --> 00:01:44,688 Right? 29 00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:47,481 -Oh, hello. Who's this? -Snap Snap. 30 00:01:47,566 --> 00:01:51,566 Oh. Does she want some breakfast? A little bit of sausage for Snap Snap? 31 00:01:51,653 --> 00:01:54,873 -No. She's vegan. -All right. 32 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:57,368 Snap Snap's a vegan. Good for Snap Snap. 33 00:01:57,451 --> 00:02:00,951 -So, where are you, um, going today? -Day spa at the Chilterns. 34 00:02:01,038 --> 00:02:02,118 -Lovely. -Lovely. 35 00:02:02,206 --> 00:02:05,286 Yeah, I need to be in the countryside. Just, you know, even for an afternoon. 36 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:06,915 [chuckles] Be nice to see some flowers 37 00:02:07,002 --> 00:02:09,552 other than on a pavement after someone's been hit by a car. 38 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,474 Okay, so there's the number. 39 00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:14,639 -Okay. Great. -I'll just put these in here. 40 00:02:15,385 --> 00:02:17,505 Chloe had a cold last week. Knocked her out of it. 41 00:02:17,596 --> 00:02:19,596 -Oh, no. -Oh, yeah. It was great. 42 00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:23,849 Don't be afraid to call. Oh, I'll just get the buggy. 43 00:02:23,936 --> 00:02:27,306 Actually, I thought we'll probably all just walk, 'cause the buggy's 44 00:02:27,397 --> 00:02:29,067 -a bit of a faff, isn't it? -Yeah. 45 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:30,939 Okay, if you're sure. 46 00:02:31,026 --> 00:02:33,146 -Yeah. -Okay. 47 00:02:33,237 --> 00:02:37,027 I've written down times for food, otherwise they get very difficult. 48 00:02:37,115 --> 00:02:38,195 Do they? 49 00:02:38,283 --> 00:02:40,913 You can be semiflexible with the midmorning snack. 50 00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:44,044 Okay. I think we'll just fold them into our day. 51 00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:45,962 -Yeah. -Rather than... 52 00:02:46,583 --> 00:02:49,463 -Uh-huh. -You know what I mean? In terms of-- Yeah. 53 00:02:50,838 --> 00:02:53,218 -Let me just check that number again. -Okay, yeah. 54 00:02:58,303 --> 00:02:59,893 So, you're talking to his exes? 55 00:03:01,807 --> 00:03:03,017 All of them? 56 00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:06,225 And you have that sort of time? 57 00:03:17,406 --> 00:03:18,946 [Nikki] This is fun, isn't it? 58 00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,412 [Jason] Much better than being with your mum and dad. 59 00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:23,752 Who wants an ice cream? 60 00:03:23,829 --> 00:03:27,459 -Me! -Yeah? Go on then. [chuckles] 61 00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:28,541 Really? 62 00:03:29,084 --> 00:03:31,464 -What? It's a special day. -It's 10:30 in the morning. 63 00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:33,665 Yeah, but I want them to have an amazing time. 64 00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:37,335 Plus, if you're too strict with food, they get eating disorders. 65 00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:39,136 -Everyone knows that. -Is that right, doctor? 66 00:03:41,305 --> 00:03:44,555 -Can I have a tutti-frutti? -No, tutti-fruttis rot your teeth. 67 00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:46,521 [man] Oh, you'll have no problems with him. 68 00:03:46,602 --> 00:03:48,562 I had him in the garage as a kid. 69 00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:52,315 If you can strip down a car and rebuild it, you can do anything. 70 00:03:54,860 --> 00:03:56,570 Well, that's not true, but... 71 00:04:02,034 --> 00:04:03,164 Should we sit over there? 72 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:04,623 -Yeah. -Yeah? 73 00:04:08,332 --> 00:04:09,372 -[Nikki grunts] -[Jason] Oh. 74 00:04:09,791 --> 00:04:12,041 [exhales] Sorry. [chuckles] [sighs] 75 00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:14,665 [Jason] That was weird. 76 00:04:16,507 --> 00:04:18,677 Excuse me. 77 00:04:18,759 --> 00:04:21,549 [Nikki] This is nice, isn't it? [chuckles] 78 00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:25,724 -What? Hang on. -[Jason] What? 79 00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:27,097 -What? -What? 80 00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:29,353 What's this? 81 00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:30,773 -[boy gasps] -[gasps] 82 00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:32,444 -What is that? What is it? -What? 83 00:04:32,523 --> 00:04:36,283 -It looks like a treasure hunt. -[Chloe] Wow! 84 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:39,910 Oh, wow! [gasps] 85 00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:46,288 It says, "A pirate has buried his, or her, treasure 86 00:04:46,370 --> 00:04:49,540 somewhere in London, and these are the clues to find it." 87 00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,633 -I wanna see, I wanna see! -That's so exciting, isn't it? 88 00:04:51,708 --> 00:04:55,208 -You hold this. Don't eat it. -All right. I won't. [sighs] 89 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,585 -What's all this? -It's a treasure hunt. 90 00:04:57,673 --> 00:04:59,013 -Did you do this, yeah? -No. 91 00:04:59,091 --> 00:05:01,341 -A pirate, Jason. -How? 92 00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:03,466 -Who knows? -Can I see it? 93 00:05:03,554 --> 00:05:05,764 Maybe the pirate got up at 6:00 this morning and set it all up. 94 00:05:05,848 --> 00:05:08,978 Did you get up at 6:00 this morning and planted all these all over London? 95 00:05:09,059 --> 00:05:12,519 Yes, but can you pay attention, please? You need to follow the instructions. 96 00:05:12,604 --> 00:05:14,274 Don't you worry about me. I can follow clues. 97 00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:17,436 Oh, really? 'Cause, I mean, you're really not following this, are you? 98 00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:19,276 -All right, shall we have a little read? -Okay, yeah. 99 00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:20,361 All right. 100 00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:26,163 "If the first clue ye wish to know, to a big building ye must go. 101 00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:28,793 The queen of England lives within. 102 00:05:28,871 --> 00:05:33,081 -The clue is hidden by a bin/lamp post." -[boy] A bin? 103 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:36,746 Right. Where do we think that is? A big building where the queen lives. 104 00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:41,427 -Buckingham Palace! Yes! -Okay! All right! [laughs] 105 00:05:45,262 --> 00:05:46,562 That's amazing. 106 00:05:48,056 --> 00:05:51,726 So, let me get this clear, right? So, it's a pirate's treasure? 107 00:05:51,810 --> 00:05:52,810 Yes. 108 00:05:52,895 --> 00:05:56,055 And he's buried it and left clues? 109 00:05:56,148 --> 00:05:57,188 Yes. 110 00:05:57,274 --> 00:05:59,194 But if he's buried it and he knows where it is... 111 00:05:59,276 --> 00:06:02,356 -Yeah, but the clues are for us. -Why does he want us to find it? 112 00:06:02,946 --> 00:06:04,946 You're really overthinking this, Jase. 113 00:06:05,824 --> 00:06:07,124 [woman] Nikki's the best. 114 00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:10,081 I mean, I've never really known anyone old before, 115 00:06:10,162 --> 00:06:12,212 'cause I thought it would be really boring. 116 00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:14,079 But she's not like other old people, 117 00:06:14,166 --> 00:06:16,456 'cause she doesn't really have her life together yet. 118 00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:19,633 Like, she doesn't have a mortgage, or money or a good career. 119 00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:24,723 And she's still quite young, mentally, so she can just be a really good laugh. 120 00:06:27,179 --> 00:06:28,759 Wait. Did I say the wrong thing? 121 00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:34,018 I mean, don't worry, she's great. She's basically exactly like me. 122 00:06:39,650 --> 00:06:42,570 -[Jason] Look at that. Buckingham Palace. -[Chloe] Wow! 123 00:06:42,653 --> 00:06:43,653 -[boy] Wow! -Right. Okay. 124 00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:46,697 So, if there's a bin, there's a lamppost, 125 00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:48,162 -you think maybe it's over there? -Yeah! 126 00:06:48,242 --> 00:06:49,952 -Do you wanna have a look? -Go on. Have a look. 127 00:06:51,537 --> 00:06:53,657 Did you see how she hugged me when she fell over? 128 00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:56,827 -Yeah. -Quite like it when they're upset. 129 00:06:57,584 --> 00:06:59,924 -Means they need you more. Is that bad? -Yeah. 130 00:07:00,003 --> 00:07:01,173 -[Nikki chuckles] -[boy] Don't see it. 131 00:07:01,255 --> 00:07:02,455 How we getting on then? Any luck? 132 00:07:02,548 --> 00:07:03,548 -[Chloe] Don't see it. -[boy] No. 133 00:07:03,632 --> 00:07:04,842 [Nikki] You can't? 134 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:07,295 -[Chloe] It's not inside the bin. -Are you looking hard enough? 135 00:07:07,386 --> 00:07:09,386 [Jason] Where could it be? Where could it be? 136 00:07:09,471 --> 00:07:10,971 -[Nikki gasps] -[boy] What? 137 00:07:11,056 --> 00:07:12,386 -I found it! -Oh, my goodness! 138 00:07:12,474 --> 00:07:13,774 -No, you haven't-- -Yes! 139 00:07:13,851 --> 00:07:15,851 -Yay! -Mate, don't wave it about. 140 00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:18,436 Don't wave it about. We're in London. Someone might have it away. 141 00:07:18,522 --> 00:07:21,072 This is treasure we got here. Right, give it to Nikki. Come on. 142 00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:22,859 -Oh, wow. -What? 143 00:07:24,653 --> 00:07:28,493 -"Now the second clue ye have found"... -You like saying the word "ye," don't you? 144 00:07:28,574 --> 00:07:32,294 -"Now the second clue ye have found... -And again. 145 00:07:32,369 --> 00:07:35,159 -...to the third, ye must be bound. -See? 146 00:07:35,247 --> 00:07:37,917 -But don't worry, it's not far. -Hmm. 147 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:41,750 Look for a square named Trafalgar." 148 00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:44,047 Now, where do we think that could be? 149 00:07:44,131 --> 00:07:46,681 Where do we think the Jamaican pirate's put it, guys? 150 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:50,217 Oh. Maybe-- I don't know, maybe Trafalgar Square? 151 00:07:50,304 --> 00:07:52,394 Trafalgar Square! Trafalgar Square! 152 00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:54,812 -Yeah, Trafalgar Square! -It's gotta be. Oh, my God! Where is it? 153 00:07:54,892 --> 00:07:57,562 -It is! -Let's have a look. Come on. Let's go. 154 00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:01,321 What do we think the treasure is? 155 00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:02,938 -A puppy. -Oh. 156 00:08:03,025 --> 00:08:04,355 -This is gonna end well. -Yeah. 157 00:08:04,902 --> 00:08:05,992 Come on then! Let's go! 158 00:08:06,612 --> 00:08:10,202 Infertility is a really hard thing to come to terms with. 159 00:08:11,408 --> 00:08:14,658 When you've had your heart set on a baby, when you've wanted it for so long 160 00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:18,325 and waited for so long, and then it doesn't happen, well... 161 00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:21,376 that's really tough to take. 162 00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:26,716 But life goes on. 163 00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:33,509 I think she meant, was it hard for Nikki and Jason? 164 00:08:34,681 --> 00:08:36,431 [gasps] Oh, right. 165 00:08:38,143 --> 00:08:41,483 Well, yes, for them too, of course. 166 00:08:43,106 --> 00:08:47,066 -[boy] Look at that amazing fountain. -[Jason] Well done, kids. They found it. 167 00:08:47,152 --> 00:08:50,612 -Yeah. So fast. Amazing. -Tower Bridge. 168 00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:52,067 -Really? -Yeah, why? 169 00:08:52,157 --> 00:08:54,657 Well, it's miles away, innit? And he needs the toilet. 170 00:08:54,743 --> 00:08:55,743 Oh. 171 00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:59,872 There's some in the National Gallery. It's free to get in. 172 00:08:59,957 --> 00:09:01,497 Oh, right. Okay, cool. 173 00:09:03,794 --> 00:09:05,004 Uh... 174 00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:07,506 What? Do you want me to? Or are you gonna? 175 00:09:07,589 --> 00:09:09,219 -I think it's best if you go. -Oh. 176 00:09:09,675 --> 00:09:12,545 -What? -Well, is he-- Like, do I need to-- 177 00:09:12,970 --> 00:09:15,600 -Is he independent, or... -What are you talking about? 178 00:09:15,681 --> 00:09:17,641 -Do I need to help him? -Help what? 179 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,354 -Help him aim it, or can he aim it? -[clicks tongue] Oh. 180 00:09:20,727 --> 00:09:22,597 -He's six. I think he can aim it. -Yeah. 181 00:09:23,397 --> 00:09:25,857 -I thought so. I'll have a-- -No. Maybe don't google that, Jase. 182 00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:27,361 Yeah. No. 183 00:09:28,277 --> 00:09:29,737 -Just let him lead. -Okay. 184 00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:32,700 -And let him ask for help if he needs it. -Yeah. I... 185 00:09:33,115 --> 00:09:35,155 -Must be so weird. -What? 186 00:09:35,242 --> 00:09:38,662 We're gonna be getting a little person and immediately be doing all this stuff. 187 00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:39,825 Yeah. 188 00:09:39,913 --> 00:09:42,293 Never seen anyone naked that soon after meeting them. 189 00:09:43,417 --> 00:09:44,497 Yeah, you have. 190 00:09:45,836 --> 00:09:47,126 Oh, yeah. I have. 191 00:09:49,882 --> 00:09:51,592 [Erica] They're also really trustworthy, aren't they? 192 00:09:51,675 --> 00:09:53,385 Oh, yeah. Really trustworthy. 193 00:09:53,468 --> 00:09:55,468 I mean, we'd be happy to leave our kids with them. 194 00:09:55,554 --> 00:09:58,274 -Oh, yeah. -You know, if we ever went out. 195 00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:01,314 -We go out. -Do we? 196 00:10:01,393 --> 00:10:02,523 Yeah. 197 00:10:03,478 --> 00:10:05,648 He works late quite a lot, so... 198 00:10:06,023 --> 00:10:07,273 Not a lot. 199 00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:12,527 -[barker] Come on, everyone! Roll up! -[Jason] This the quickest way? 200 00:10:12,613 --> 00:10:14,413 -Yes, definitely. -Okay. 201 00:10:14,489 --> 00:10:16,069 -I think. -[barker] London's oldest dungeon! 202 00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:18,238 -Where are the kids? -What? I thought you were watching them. 203 00:10:18,327 --> 00:10:20,287 -You were supposed to be watching them! -Where are they? 204 00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:21,540 -They're just there. -Oh, no! 205 00:10:21,622 --> 00:10:22,922 I tagged you. 206 00:10:22,998 --> 00:10:24,288 -Did you enjoy that? -Yeah. 207 00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:25,634 -I hope you enjoyed that. -Very much. 208 00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:27,589 Because that is the last time you will get to do that. 209 00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:29,379 -I got it. -Come and see The Dungeon Experience! 210 00:10:29,463 --> 00:10:31,423 Oh, shit. No. Kids, we're not going in there! 211 00:10:31,507 --> 00:10:33,377 Hell no! Not at those prices. 212 00:10:33,467 --> 00:10:35,007 -Okay. I'll go get them. -All right. 213 00:10:35,093 --> 00:10:36,933 No. Come on, guys. We're not going in there. 214 00:10:37,012 --> 00:10:40,392 -Twenty-one pounds each. -Sorry, not today. 215 00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:43,274 Hi. Come on. Don't you wanna carry on with the treasure hunt? 216 00:10:43,352 --> 00:10:44,352 -No. -Roll up! 217 00:10:44,436 --> 00:10:46,646 -No! -Oh, come on. Please, it'll be fun. 218 00:10:46,730 --> 00:10:47,980 [barker] Hello, poppet. 219 00:10:48,065 --> 00:10:51,855 -Mm. Here we go. -Yeah, it's me. Mrs. Hannigan. 220 00:10:52,361 --> 00:10:55,951 Wrongfully imprisoned here in 1842. 221 00:10:56,031 --> 00:10:58,081 -Really? -Okay. You're not helping massively. 222 00:10:58,158 --> 00:11:00,908 -Don't you want to find the next clue? -No. 223 00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:06,674 [laughing] Mean mummy.You take a leaflet. 224 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:09,594 -They said, "No." -What do you mean they said, "No"? 225 00:11:09,670 --> 00:11:11,170 They said, "No." 226 00:11:11,255 --> 00:11:13,585 -You can't ask. You got to tell. -All right, be my guest. 227 00:11:13,674 --> 00:11:16,684 It's not a negotiation, is it? They're little kids, not a man with a gun. 228 00:11:20,264 --> 00:11:22,394 -Two adults, two children, please. -Sure. 229 00:11:22,474 --> 00:11:24,484 So, that'll be £75.60. 230 00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:27,060 And would you like an audio guide with that? Six pounds extra. 231 00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:28,895 -That sounds lovely. -No. 232 00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:35,699 Welcome to The Dungeon Experience. 233 00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:38,819 It's a long way down to the torture chamber. 234 00:11:38,907 --> 00:11:42,037 But don't worry. If you get tired at the bottom, 235 00:11:42,119 --> 00:11:45,869 you can always have a nice lie-down on the rack, 236 00:11:45,956 --> 00:11:48,286 until your joints dislocate, 237 00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:53,455 your flesh tears apart and your insides spill out! [cackles] 238 00:11:53,547 --> 00:11:55,257 [kids screaming] 239 00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:56,550 [Nikki] For goodness' sake. 240 00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:58,513 -Come on. Come back, kids. Sam? -Nice one, mate. 241 00:11:59,136 --> 00:12:01,006 -I'm so sorry. It was... -[Nikki] Come back. 242 00:12:01,096 --> 00:12:02,426 Chloe! 243 00:12:03,098 --> 00:12:06,018 -Rest of you, come with me. -Less than five minutes. 244 00:12:07,561 --> 00:12:09,521 -I want my mummy. -It's okay. 245 00:12:09,605 --> 00:12:12,145 It's okay. He was a nasty man, wasn't he? 246 00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:14,862 Yeah, thanks for nothing. He's not having it. 247 00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:17,913 I mean, that's £75 a minute. That's what bankers pay to go to real dungeons 248 00:12:17,988 --> 00:12:19,618 and have people actually torture 'em. 249 00:12:19,698 --> 00:12:22,158 -I'm hungry. -Are you, mate? 250 00:12:22,868 --> 00:12:25,288 I think there was a fish and chip place over there. 251 00:12:25,370 --> 00:12:29,880 No, I've hidden a clue at Borough Market. It's got food from all over the world. 252 00:12:29,958 --> 00:12:33,498 Yeah, yeah. 'Cause kids much prefer Ethiopian street food to fish and chips. 253 00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:36,168 Come here. 254 00:12:36,924 --> 00:12:39,474 Come on. They're starving. Let's just go down there and have a look. 255 00:12:39,551 --> 00:12:42,101 You all right? Want me to carry you? 256 00:12:42,179 --> 00:12:44,769 Do you want to carry-- Yeah, let's not forget this little bag here. 257 00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:46,850 It's just about priorities really. 258 00:12:46,934 --> 00:12:50,354 -If I work hard, it's for us. -We have enough. You work for you. 259 00:12:50,437 --> 00:12:52,857 I would just like to have something to show for my life. 260 00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:55,150 -You have two children. -Everyone has children. 261 00:12:56,235 --> 00:12:58,145 Not everyone's a company director aged 38. 262 00:12:58,237 --> 00:12:59,527 Okay. Wow. 263 00:12:59,613 --> 00:13:01,573 You know what? Most men do much less than me. 264 00:13:01,657 --> 00:13:04,077 -Sean doesn't do pickups or drop-offs. -Yeah, I'm very lucky. 265 00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:06,499 Look, just could be worse, that's all I'm saying. 266 00:13:06,578 --> 00:13:08,788 -Chris, Omar and Jason... -Very lucky girl. 267 00:13:08,872 --> 00:13:11,882 Jason, he works way more antisocial hours than me, 268 00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,339 doesn't earn a third as much. 269 00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,423 -[Jason] Oh. Okay. -[Sam mutters] 270 00:13:18,507 --> 00:13:20,297 -[grunts] -Okay.That's quite annoying. 271 00:13:20,384 --> 00:13:22,224 -[Nikki] You're gonna hurt yourselves. -All right. Okay. Thank you. 272 00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:24,352 Excuse me. Hi. Hello. Can we have some menus, please? 273 00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:27,019 And we're not tourists, so if we can have the ones with the real prices, 274 00:13:27,099 --> 00:13:29,479 -that'd be great.Thank you. [chuckles] -Yeah, sure. 275 00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:32,020 -Okay. Yeah. Listen, that's annoying. -So cute. 276 00:13:32,104 --> 00:13:34,774 Yes, sometimes. Cute little monsters more like. 277 00:13:34,857 --> 00:13:36,897 That's enough of that. Thank you. 278 00:13:36,984 --> 00:13:38,694 This is Chloe and this is Sam. 279 00:13:38,777 --> 00:13:40,197 -Hi. -Say hello. 280 00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:43,704 I wish you wouldn't speak to the waiters all the time. 281 00:13:43,782 --> 00:13:45,532 -That means you have to leave a tip. -Don't be so tight. 282 00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:47,617 That was a £9 conversation you just had. 283 00:13:48,829 --> 00:13:50,869 Whoa! Careful! Sorry. 284 00:13:50,956 --> 00:13:52,786 -Come on. -[water bubbling] 285 00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:54,705 -Was that-- -Wow. 286 00:13:54,793 --> 00:13:57,383 -Dude, don't spit everywhere. -Hey, mate. Please. 287 00:13:57,462 --> 00:13:59,462 -That's naughty, mate. All right? -[Chloe crying] 288 00:13:59,923 --> 00:14:02,263 What? Why are you crying? 289 00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,850 I mean, literally nothing has happened. 290 00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:09,639 Come on. Come on. Don't cry. Come on. 291 00:14:09,725 --> 00:14:13,725 A time she has overcome adversity... 292 00:14:14,563 --> 00:14:16,523 Well, I mean-- That's-- 293 00:14:16,607 --> 00:14:18,897 I mean, that's the great thing about Nikki, isn't it? 294 00:14:18,984 --> 00:14:21,114 You know, she finds everything difficult. 295 00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:27,406 Which is a good thing, you know, because she just keeps on going. 296 00:14:28,410 --> 00:14:30,540 That's people, though, isn't it? You know, some people. 297 00:14:30,621 --> 00:14:32,871 I mean, stressed all the time. 298 00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:36,380 I don't do that. Stress is a toxin. 299 00:14:37,002 --> 00:14:39,512 Body can't process it. It is the lactose of the mind. 300 00:14:39,588 --> 00:14:42,378 Babe, she doesn't get stressed. 301 00:14:44,635 --> 00:14:46,545 She had that big panic attack in Whole Foods. 302 00:14:46,637 --> 00:14:50,097 Well... there was a lot going on. 303 00:14:51,099 --> 00:14:53,139 Work was a nightmare. 304 00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:57,022 She was growing out this pixie cut. It was a difficult time. 305 00:14:58,357 --> 00:14:59,687 And it wasn't that big. 306 00:15:00,776 --> 00:15:02,736 [whispering] Bit of hyperventilating. 307 00:15:04,363 --> 00:15:07,373 It's quite a good place for it, actually, innit? 308 00:15:07,449 --> 00:15:09,739 You know, 'cause all their bags are made of paper. 309 00:15:11,537 --> 00:15:14,407 -Let's sit down now, guys. Let's sit down. -[Jason] Guys, come on. Please, sit down. 310 00:15:14,498 --> 00:15:17,458 -I think we should probably just go. -Look! There's some chocolate cake! 311 00:15:17,543 --> 00:15:20,753 Look, there's some chocolate cake. Why don't we all sit down? 312 00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:23,971 Yeah. Sit down and we can have some nice, lovely chocolate cake. 313 00:15:24,049 --> 00:15:26,679 -Chocolate cake? It's full of sugar. -Have you got any better ideas? 314 00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:30,180 -They hardly touched their dinner. -Look. It's got caramel in the middle. 315 00:15:30,264 --> 00:15:33,104 Yeah, well, it's £6.50. So, unless there's £4.50 in the middle... 316 00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:35,193 I'd really like us not to fall into these patterns. 317 00:15:35,269 --> 00:15:36,399 What patterns? 318 00:15:36,478 --> 00:15:38,058 Me having to battle every time I want to treat them. 319 00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:39,976 A treat's not a treat if it's all the time, is it? 320 00:15:40,065 --> 00:15:42,355 -I'm not depriving our kids, Jason. -What do you mean, deprive? 321 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,742 They're not deprived. Kids in Syria are deprived. 322 00:15:44,820 --> 00:15:46,820 I'd like to buy chocolate cake for everyone in Syria, 323 00:15:46,905 --> 00:15:48,525 but that's just not practical, is it? 324 00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:51,155 Hello. Could I just have a couple of chocolate cakes, please? 325 00:15:51,243 --> 00:15:53,413 Hiya. Could we box those up to go, as well, please? 326 00:15:53,954 --> 00:15:56,294 Eighteen quid. She's off again. 327 00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:59,170 No. Come on, Chloe. No, no. Oh, don't do-- 328 00:15:59,251 --> 00:16:01,251 -[gasps] -[Nikki mutters, exhales] 329 00:16:02,546 --> 00:16:05,126 Yeah, well, she has a developmental disorder actually, so... 330 00:16:05,215 --> 00:16:09,255 -Oh. God, I'm so sorry. -Yeah. Well. 331 00:16:10,179 --> 00:16:12,849 Come on. Come on. Let's sit down. Good girl. 332 00:16:16,894 --> 00:16:19,734 -Does she? -No. But I will not have her judged. 333 00:16:22,941 --> 00:16:25,031 [Sandra] She's just a very strong woman. 334 00:16:25,527 --> 00:16:27,067 You wouldn't mess with her. 335 00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:28,614 And bright as a button. 336 00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,067 What's that word you used? 337 00:16:31,450 --> 00:16:33,580 -Infectious. -"Infectious." 338 00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:35,540 She's infectious. 339 00:16:35,621 --> 00:16:37,871 You couldn't have picked a better match for Jason. 340 00:16:38,707 --> 00:16:42,207 Yeah. We were sorry to see Jane go. 341 00:16:44,254 --> 00:16:46,844 But these things happen, and he's with Nikki now, so... 342 00:16:49,051 --> 00:16:50,681 -And we love Nikki. -Yeah. 343 00:16:50,761 --> 00:16:51,851 Yes. [chuckling] 344 00:16:57,226 --> 00:17:00,146 Oh, and, uh, uh, we won't need this one. 345 00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:02,691 We don't have an ethnicity. 346 00:17:07,194 --> 00:17:09,404 Lovely. Oh, look. Band's broken up again. 347 00:17:09,488 --> 00:17:11,238 Come on, guys! Keep up, hey! 348 00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:15,164 Sort of thought they'd be more into the treasure hunt. 349 00:17:15,993 --> 00:17:18,413 Tracking down the clues, working stuff out. 350 00:17:19,039 --> 00:17:20,539 That sounds like '80s kids. 351 00:17:21,500 --> 00:17:23,250 What was the-- What is the treasure? 352 00:17:23,335 --> 00:17:28,045 -It's a really great empowering message. -Oh, they'll love that. Yeah. 353 00:17:28,131 --> 00:17:30,591 -And a bag of sweets. -[laughs] 354 00:17:30,676 --> 00:17:33,216 Look, why don't we call it and get 'em home, hey? 355 00:17:33,303 --> 00:17:35,473 -I mean, they're knackered. -No, Jase. Really? 356 00:17:36,431 --> 00:17:38,061 So, that was our special day? 357 00:17:38,141 --> 00:17:41,481 Listen, you've gone about taping packages to five London landmarks. All right? 358 00:17:41,562 --> 00:17:43,732 So just be grateful you haven't been shot. 359 00:17:43,814 --> 00:17:45,074 All right? 360 00:17:45,148 --> 00:17:47,188 -I just want to do one more thing. -Like what? 361 00:17:47,276 --> 00:17:50,736 I don't know. Just something really amazing. 362 00:17:56,535 --> 00:17:59,445 Oh, no. Come on. They'll love it. 363 00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:01,158 -Do you wanna go on the London Eye? -Yeah! 364 00:18:01,248 --> 00:18:02,708 Yeah? See? See? 365 00:18:02,791 --> 00:18:04,961 'Course they're gonna. They say yes to everything. 366 00:18:05,043 --> 00:18:06,043 [Nikki] Come on. 367 00:18:21,476 --> 00:18:22,766 [Nikki] Thank you. 368 00:18:22,853 --> 00:18:25,023 -Get a seat. Get a seat. -[Jason] Sit down there. Good boy. 369 00:18:25,105 --> 00:18:26,225 Good girl. 370 00:18:28,567 --> 00:18:31,487 -Oh, wow. This is exciting. -This is exciting, innit? Yeah. 371 00:18:33,572 --> 00:18:35,702 Oh, wow. This is amazing! 372 00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:37,912 Look how high we're going. 373 00:18:37,993 --> 00:18:41,163 Oh, look, there's Buckingham Palace. We were there earlier. [chuckles] 374 00:18:41,747 --> 00:18:43,497 And that's the Houses of Parliament. 375 00:18:43,582 --> 00:18:46,002 It's where people make decisions about the country. 376 00:18:47,252 --> 00:18:48,632 Well, sometimes. 377 00:18:49,922 --> 00:18:52,762 And that big round building there is... 378 00:18:54,551 --> 00:18:56,511 [man] I always get those confused. 379 00:18:56,595 --> 00:18:58,305 [passengers chattering, laughing] 380 00:18:58,388 --> 00:19:00,098 [man] Oh, is that-- Yeah, you're probably right. 381 00:19:00,182 --> 00:19:01,682 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that is it. 382 00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:04,897 What's that big round building there? 383 00:19:06,188 --> 00:19:07,608 St. Paul's. 384 00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:10,399 They would've loved this. 385 00:19:15,239 --> 00:19:17,489 -We are gonna go and wake them up, right? -God, yeah. 386 00:19:25,082 --> 00:19:27,712 -Come on. You're missing all the fun. -Come have a look. Come on. 387 00:19:28,460 --> 00:19:30,840 -Should I show you where we were before? -Big Ben! 388 00:19:30,921 --> 00:19:34,421 So we dated for three years, and then he broke up with me, 389 00:19:35,092 --> 00:19:36,552 then got together with Nikki. 390 00:19:37,845 --> 00:19:39,215 In that order. 391 00:19:40,138 --> 00:19:44,558 It was just one of those classic six-year rebound flings... 392 00:19:46,270 --> 00:19:47,940 where you end up adopting kids. 393 00:19:49,147 --> 00:19:50,727 But I don't really know Nikki. 394 00:19:51,650 --> 00:19:53,650 Just online stuff. 395 00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:55,781 But she seems nice. 396 00:19:56,780 --> 00:19:59,410 Kind of Etsy. Not my thing. 397 00:20:00,409 --> 00:20:03,499 Not every jumper needs to have a fox on it. Do you know what I mean? 398 00:20:03,912 --> 00:20:06,422 But, um, I'm sure she's great. 399 00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:08,998 And he seems happy. 400 00:20:12,171 --> 00:20:13,631 -[Jason] You all right? -[Nikki] Yeah. 401 00:20:13,714 --> 00:20:14,804 -Yeah? -Fine. 402 00:20:16,842 --> 00:20:19,012 Spend all day wanting them to be quiet, 403 00:20:19,094 --> 00:20:21,814 then when they are, you immediately miss them. 404 00:20:21,889 --> 00:20:25,059 Yeah, I know. Self-preservation this, mate. 405 00:20:25,142 --> 00:20:28,602 They fall asleep three minutes before you lose patience and abandon them, 406 00:20:28,687 --> 00:20:34,357 and then they look so sweet and adorable that you forget how unbearable they were. 407 00:20:34,776 --> 00:20:37,106 Then it happens the next day, then 7,000 more times, 408 00:20:37,196 --> 00:20:40,156 and then you drive them to university. 409 00:20:41,074 --> 00:20:42,834 -Sounds fun. -Yeah, sounds great. 410 00:21:01,470 --> 00:21:04,310 Hi. Oh. Um-- 411 00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:07,268 Well, come in. [chuckles] Come on in. 412 00:21:09,811 --> 00:21:12,231 [whispering] There were only two children, weren't there? I can't-- 413 00:21:12,314 --> 00:21:14,984 -[mom chuckles] Yeah. -[Jason] Oh. 414 00:21:16,318 --> 00:21:19,488 -So, um, how long have they been asleep? -[Nikki] Oh, not long. 415 00:21:20,405 --> 00:21:23,075 About 45. Hmm... 416 00:21:24,743 --> 00:21:26,703 -Four to five minutes. -[whispering] Yeah. 417 00:21:26,787 --> 00:21:27,997 -Okay. -About five minutes. 418 00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:31,710 Okay. Sweetheart. Uh, wake up, sweetheart. [chuckles] [sniffs] 419 00:21:31,792 --> 00:21:32,842 How was the spa? 420 00:21:32,918 --> 00:21:35,418 Well, it was 300 quid, and it smelled like a dentist's, so... 421 00:21:35,504 --> 00:21:37,054 -Lovely. -Sweetheart, wake up. 422 00:21:37,130 --> 00:21:38,470 -Time to wake up, darling. -Here you go. 423 00:21:38,549 --> 00:21:40,089 Oh, no, you're okay, mate. Rush. 424 00:21:40,175 --> 00:21:43,255 Mate, I know my kids. Have a beer. 425 00:21:44,179 --> 00:21:46,009 -Lovely. Thanks. -[laughs] 426 00:22:04,867 --> 00:22:06,027 [Jason clears throat] 427 00:22:06,952 --> 00:22:09,162 [inhales] [sighs] 428 00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:31,190 -Is that a good book? -Yeah. 429 00:22:31,268 --> 00:22:32,268 Yeah. 430 00:22:35,063 --> 00:22:36,983 -What's the matter? -Nothing. I'm reading my book. 431 00:22:37,065 --> 00:22:39,395 It's not the end of the world if it wasn't the perfect day. 432 00:22:39,484 --> 00:22:42,454 -Yeah. No, I know. -You know, I-- [stammers] [sighs] 433 00:22:44,114 --> 00:22:46,954 I just think maybe you tried a little bit too hard, that's all. 434 00:22:49,161 --> 00:22:50,161 Yeah. 435 00:22:51,747 --> 00:22:54,037 Or maybe you weren't trying hard enough. 436 00:22:55,959 --> 00:22:58,459 We need to learn to bond with children. If we couldn't bond with them, then-- 437 00:22:58,545 --> 00:23:02,045 But we're never gonna bond with them in the way that we will with ours, are we? 438 00:23:02,132 --> 00:23:03,472 -Why? -Because they're not our kids. 439 00:23:03,550 --> 00:23:06,090 They're someone else's kids who miss their mum and dad. 440 00:23:06,178 --> 00:23:09,968 Yeah. Jason, that is exactly who our kids are gonna be. 441 00:23:10,057 --> 00:23:13,267 Someone else's kids who miss their mum and dad. 442 00:23:13,352 --> 00:23:15,482 And it's gonna be a lot harder than today was. 443 00:23:15,562 --> 00:23:17,732 They might not even like us. They might not even talk to us. 444 00:23:17,814 --> 00:23:20,944 And we're gonna have to deal with all of that, whether we like it or not. 445 00:23:22,236 --> 00:23:24,196 And so you know, I am gonna be trying hard. 446 00:23:24,279 --> 00:23:28,329 I am gonna be trying really hard because we're gonna have to. 447 00:23:29,284 --> 00:23:33,124 And I cannot have you standing behind me, tutting and rolling your eyes. 448 00:23:33,205 --> 00:23:34,995 -Okay? -Yeah. 449 00:23:36,291 --> 00:23:38,291 Your mum is gonna be doing enough of that. 450 00:24:39,104 --> 00:24:42,024 Ice cream! I want my ice cream! 451 00:24:42,107 --> 00:24:44,227 Penguin wants ice cream! Ah! 452 00:24:51,825 --> 00:24:52,905 [sighs] 453 00:25:37,246 --> 00:25:38,246 [chuckles] 454 00:25:38,330 --> 00:25:40,500 -How long have you been there for? -About an hour. 455 00:25:40,582 --> 00:25:42,632 Mm. [chuckles] 456 00:25:46,004 --> 00:25:48,014 [Skittles bag crinkling] 457 00:25:49,758 --> 00:25:50,838 Nikki?