Another day slips away
-And you're fading -Beyond us now
You never were one To stay where you belong
They say love takes time
But why'd you waste mine, baby?
Be honest now
You've been gone for so long
-So, so long -So long
Thank you.
-We're here. -Yeah.
-We're doing it. -We're doing it.
Hey, guys. You sound amazing.
-I have a couple things I wanna run-- -Thank you.
Can we talk about it after the show?
-Oh, my God. Of course. -Thanks.
Wow.
Let's change up the encore.
Really. I think we should do it.
Yeah. We can't really do that.
-Don't you wanna play something else? -I mean, sure…
-Yes, you do. Look at you. No. -…you know what we have to play.
No.
If you could play any song right now, what would you play?
What would you play?
"High Low."
That could be cool. It could be cool.
Oh, my God. Wait. I have the best idea.
Let's play "Quote Me."
That would be perfect right now.
Yeah?
-Will you tell Greg and Lia? -Sure.
I love you.
Los Angeles.
I fucking love this city.
You know, Josh, he was born and raised here.
-What's up, 818? -Yeah!
I heard you.
Okay. So, before we do this last song for you guys,
I just wanna tell you
how grateful we are that you're all here tonight.
It's kind of a miracle
that any of us are here right now, right here in this room.
Think about all the little things that had to happen to get you here,
starting a lifetime ago when your parents decided to make you.
And somehow you ended up in LA.
Maybe you chose to be here, like me, or you were born here, like Josh.
And then recently, you heard about this show.
And you decided to come. And now here you are.
And there were a million steps
that could have gone differently along the way.
Either because you made a different choice
or some other reason that was totally out of your control.
You could be somewhere else right now.
You could be someone else.
You ready?
But you're not.
You're you.
And you're here, with us, right now.
And we love you for that.
We love you too!
This song is called "Quote Me."
One, two, three, four.
"Judith."
-Hello? -Hi. Is this Judith?
-Yeah. -Hi, Judith. This is Josh.
-How are you today? -Fine.
Judith, can I ask you a question? Do you ever think about saving money?
So, this one gets really good reviews.
You know, you can pay people to write good reviews online.
That's true, but I'm reading these. They seem pretty legit.
-I don't know how you think you know that. -'Cause I'm reading them.
I know. I can see you're reading them.
Okay, how do you wanna decide?
Okay, so now it's on me?
I don't know what you want me to do.
I want you to be a grown-up and make a decision.
Okay. How about this one?
-It's the same fucking one. -Yep.
Oh, my God. Josh, you're so annoying.
Just go find Sophie. She's the giraffe.
We had no choice.
We had nothing to eat.
Did you feel your life was in danger?
We didn't eat for days. We were going to die.
-We were dying. -I know, and I'm so sorry
you went through that.
But to give you any opportunity for asylum in the United States,
I need to prove you feared persecution.
If not, I can help you get a work permit here in Colombia.
Okay?
So, did you feel your life was in danger?
-Yes. -Yes. Good.
Thank you so much.
-Sorry, what was your name? -Astrid.
Astrid. You wanna know how much money this incredibly talented team just made
for our company, Astrid?
It's a pretty high number.
-Do you wanna know what it is? -Whoa. Okay.
Come on. It's fun to say out loud.
What was the final number? Seventy-six what?
Seventy-six, four five.
$76,450,000. Come on! That's a lot of houses.
Astrid, aren't you happy
for these hardworking and successful people?
I'm very happy for you all. Congratulations.
That was so sweet. Thank you, Astrid.
-Cheers, everyone. -Cheers!
Yeah.
Peter, what was your favorite part of the experience? Go.
Me, I just can't help but think about what happened back in August.
I'm sure you know what I'm referring to.
-Absolutely. -Oh, God.
The whole deal almost fell apart.
It would've fallen apart if Wilson hadn't come in at the last minute
and saved our you-know-whats.
-I guess sometimes you get lucky. -Hear, hear.
-But, man, what a roller coaster though. -Sorry, man, but wait, hold on.
-You can't sell yourself short like that. -I'm sorry?
You chalked up this big victory to luck.
You said it wouldn't have happened except we got lucky. That's not fair.
I was just saying--
You might not have meant that, but words matter, so let's be clear.
The four of us are not drinking champagne right now because we got lucky, right?
We've been working our asses off on nothing but this deal for two years.
Peter, I know how hard you worked. I mean…
This deal was never gonna fall apart, 'cause we weren't gonna let it fall apart.
Did we hit a rough patch in August? Yeah, we did.
And did Wilson provide a solution? Yeah, they did.
But if they hadn't, we would've figured something else out,
'cause we were playing to win.
Thank you, Astrid.
You wanna know who talks about luck? It's gamblers and losers.
I'm sorry, I know that sounds kinda harsh, but it's true.
If you hear someone talking about, "My deal fell apart. I had such bad luck,"
the person's a loser.
And the four of us, we are clearly not losers.
And we have 76 million new friends in our bank account to prove it.
You guys should be proud of yourselves!
I don't want you going home tonight feeling like, "Oh, we got lucky."
I want you going home tonight feeling that beautiful feeling
that really only comes from winning.
And I want you knowing with full confidence,
without any doubt in your mind,
we won today 'cause we deserved it.
I'll drink to that.
-Hi, Astrid. -How you doing there?
Best day of my life.
You've had quite a bit to drink.
Yeah, well, you know, it's a question of personal tolerance.
Mine's pretty high.
But I wanted to buy a round for everyone in here.
No, 'cause, listen, this is a special moment for me.
Like, my life changed today 'cause I'm rich now.
Like, starting today.
I'm fucking rich. I wasn't born rich, and now I am.
And so all these people here tonight are dear to me,
because they were the ones with me when it happened.
So I just wanna buy 'em all a drink.
That's very generous, but there's a lot of people here.
I know you can't see them all.
Oh, yeah, no. No, that's the point. I want the bill to be high.
I wanna see a ridiculous bill and pay it and not care.
That is the experience that I'm looking to have right now.
Can you-- Can you help me?
What do you wanna buy for them?
Don Julio.
All right, I'm gonna go count everyone up. You sure you want one for everybody?
One for every blessed soul in this entire establishment.
You're funny.
Hey, wait. Just one other thing I wanted to ask.
-Yeah? -What are you doing tomorrow?
Because I'm gonna fly away to a beach somewhere,
and I think you should come with me.
-Let me get everyone's Don Julio. -Oh, no. I'm serious about this.
I have a boyfriend.
And how much does he make in a year?
-Sir-- -No. How much does he make?
I think you've had a bit too much tonight. You be safe getting home.
Don't turn your fucking back on me!
-Hey! I said how much does he make? -Sir.
How much does he make?
-How much does he make? -Sir!
Get the fuck off! I said get the fuck off me!
How much does he make, you fucking bitch?
Josh, slow down.
I just don't wanna be late.
We're not late.
You're always rushing to get places,
and then you always wanna leave as soon as you're there.
Okay, but that's not just me. That's everybody.
It's a little bit more you.
-Just got a limited window today, so… -I know. I know, I know.
Did you tell her to be ready?
She's meeting us out front, but guess she had a hard morning, so…
I'm sure she did.
Come on. She's…
You know, she's had it pretty tough.
-Maybe. -May--
What do you mean "maybe"?
I don't know. I mean, I know she has.
It just-- It seems that's her excuse for everything.
That she's got it so bad and you've got it so good.
Yeah. But, I mean, I do have it so good.
I got you.
Got that boy back there.
And he has those legs.
Look at them. They're so fat.
He's a good, fat baby.
And he is safe.
Which is why I want you to slow down.
Okay. Slowing down.
Just so you know, it's not 'cause you told me to, it's 'cause we're here.
-I thought she was meeting us out front. -Yeah.
-I know. I'm sorry. -Hi.
Hi. I don't have any clean clothes.
It's just, like, the lady that lives across the way in Apartment 44,
she leaves her shit in the dryer.
Two hours ago I told her that I needed to use it,
and she was like, "Take my stuff out. Put it on the dryer."
I was like, "Bitch, I'm not gonna do your laundry."
-So that's where I am. -Yeah. That's ridiculous.
-Yeah. -Wanna go in what you're wearing?
-I can't go in what I'm wearing. -I think you can.
Why do you always contradict me?
I'm sorry that I contradicted you. It's just the timing on this is critical.
Okay, dude. Dude, don't talk to me in that even-keeled voice.
Like you're so reasonable
-and I'm out of line? -Beth--
-I get you're someone's daddy now-- -Hey!
Either you come, or I do this by myself. Which do you want?
That was good.
Yeah. Let's go.
Does that work on your wife?
I have a sick feeling in my stomach. I don't wanna do this.
Well, we're doing it.
Okay.
Oh, my God. She is so depressing.
-No, she's not. -Yes, she is. She's very depressing.
Josh, she's depressing.
Hi, Mom.
-What is this? Wh-- Why are you all here? -I told you we were gonna come by.
I know. But what's everybody else doing here?
Is Jacob okay?
Yeah, Jacob's fine. See?
Can we come in?
-Why? -Mom, just let us come in.
We wanna have a conversation with you…
because we're worried about you.
And we have been for some time.
And we think that you need to leave Dad.
-What is this? An intervention? -Don't-- You know--
You're doing an intervention in front of a baby?
-Mom, what does he care? -I care!
I don't want my grandson hearing this.
Okay. Okay.
I'm so sorry to interrupt, but my milk just started.
-Okay. That's great. -Jesus, that's so crazy!
Wh-- Can you please? It's not crazy. It's beautiful.
She's leaking.
That is very sweet, babe, but can you get me a paper towel?
-Yeah. -We're out.
Seriously?
Yes. What--
Here, I have a napkin.
Are you comfortable there?
-We're great. Thank you. -Good.
Okay, so now I guess I have to leave your father
because we don't have paper towels in the house.
Kind of.
I'm done. I've heard enough. You've said what you need to say.
No, there is a lot more for us to say.
I am not leaving your father, all right?
So when Jacob's finished, you should leave,
because he's gonna be home any minute.
No, he's not. We timed this out.
He's at Barone's right now with Hal and Dot.
He's watching Jeopardy!
And we got a lot of time until Final Jeopardy.
Okay, that's true.
If I left Artie now, he'd die.
Mom, you don't know that.
Yes, I do.
Okay, but it's not really about him. It's about you.
You don't have any friends left because of him.
You don't have any money left because of him.
All you have is him.
-Yeah, and all he has is me. He needs me. -But what about what you need?
How dare you two come and do this.
I stayed in this shitty life for you two because I thought it was best for you.
Look-- Look at you. Look where you are.
You're an amazing professor. About to get tenure.
You're married to a wonderful woman. You have a healthy child.
You think that would have happened if you were from a broken home?
What about me, Mom?
I don't have any of that shit.
Yeah, well, you're a different story.
Okay, great.
I mean, I didn't feel that stable either growing up.
Living with Dad was scary.
Well, it would've been worse if I was a single mother.
I mean, both of your lives would've been totally different.
It could've been--
It-- It could've sucked!
I have to pee.
No, can--
She always has to pee when she doesn't like a situation.
I know.
Mom, are you gonna come out?
I'm going to the bathroom.
Yeah, but it's been a long time now.
It turns out I had more to do.
She literally locked herself in the bathroom.
Of course I locked the door. I'm going to the bathroom.
But I didn't lock myself in the bathroom.
What time is it?
-Getting late. -Fuck.
I'm certainly never gonna finish if you two stay outside the door.
How long's she been in there?
Twenty-one minutes.
-How much longer till Final Jeopardy? -It's already over.
Fucking waited us out.
I'm here.
I want you both to know I appreciate what you're trying to do.
-It's 'cause we love you, Mom. -I know.
What are you gonna tell him?
No, what are you gonna tell him?
Darling, listen to me. I'm safe, okay?
We have food here. We have a generator. I can stay here as long as I need to.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm not sure, but I'll let you know as soon as I hear more.
Yes, trust me. I am safe.
Yeah, I know.
Most people in this town aren't so lucky.
Love you too.
Twinkle, twinkle, little star
How I--
Get away from my baby!
Taco Tuesday.
Hey! You made it.
-Hey. -I'm so happy to see you.
-You too. -Wanna dance?
Thought you'd never ask.
Hey. Hi.
I was--
I knew he hit his head and, you know, but I'm--
He was fine. He seemed fine, you know.
He-- He drove us home, no problem.
I should have known, you know.
I should ha-- I'm so sorry. I should have known. He's my friend.
It's not your fault. You can't blame yourself.
Right, it's just-- It's shitty fucking luck.
I should have known. I'm so sorry. Sorry.
You think he'd be mad that we're drinking in his honor?
No.
No, actually, I don't think he would.
-He never judged me for having a drink. -Really? That's funny.
He's the most judgmental person I have ever known.
Except for you, Mom. I'm sorry.
Trust me, I know all about that. He hated everything.
When he-- When he quit our band and started teaching,
and I kept going with the music stuff…
I always thought he was judging me for that, you know?
But when I look back,
I think maybe he was kinda just looking out for me, in his own way.
He did that a lot.
He worried about me.
Maybe he just didn't want me to make the wrong choice,
then wake up one day feeling like I was living the wrong life
and wondering how I got there, you know?
Most of the time we never even have a choice. We just think we do.
Yeah. I guess that's why I'm still singing.
Well, cheers to that.
Hell yeah.
I think you have a beautiful voice.
-Really? -Absolutely.
Thanks, Ruthie.
Honey. You don't have to thank me. It's just true.
Certainly better than some of those bleep-bloop-bloppily noises
-Joshua made out of his songs, right? -What was that?
The bloopy-- The bloopy things.
-The bleepy-- What were they? -I don't know.
Okay.
It's okay.
It is ten after 8:00. Everybody done with breakfast?
You're still eating. Take your time. Mind if we start though?
-Nah. I'm good. -Cool.
Everybody else good? Feeling it? I'm feeling it today.
It's gonna be a good day. We're gonna get a lot done. You ready?
Another day slips away And you're fading
-Beyond -Beyond us now
You never were one To stay where you belong
They say love takes time
But why'd you waste mine, baby?
Be honest now
You've been gone for so long
-So, so long -So long
-And you're fading -Beyond us now
You never were one To stay where you belong
They say love takes time
But why'd you waste mine?
-Be honest, be honest -Be honest now
You've been gone for so long
-So, so long -So long