1 00:01:12,240 --> 00:01:17,880 Raulhac, Cantal. September 1st, 1905. 2 00:02:35,110 --> 00:02:36,680 I killed François Raulhac. 3 00:02:38,110 --> 00:02:40,150 And I'm here to give myself up. 4 00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:19,240 Reidal! 5 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,430 Follow me. 6 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,080 I want the hands stiff. Motionless. 7 00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:34,960 Lean on the chair. 8 00:03:39,590 --> 00:03:42,520 The photo will be blurry. You'll need to help him. 9 00:03:43,430 --> 00:03:46,990 Bruno Reidal is presently a young man of 17, 10 00:03:47,710 --> 00:03:52,640 5 feet 3 inches tall and weighing 7 stone 12 pounds. 11 00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:55,240 Inhale. 12 00:03:57,550 --> 00:03:58,640 Slowly. 13 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:01,080 Close your eyes. 14 00:04:08,990 --> 00:04:11,080 His overall appearance is delicate. 15 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:13,030 The build is weak, 16 00:04:13,110 --> 00:04:14,590 the chest narrow, 17 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:16,320 the muscles small, 18 00:04:16,400 --> 00:04:18,440 and the body generally lean and scrawny. 19 00:04:23,230 --> 00:04:24,200 That should do. 20 00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:38,670 Look at the lens. 21 00:04:41,350 --> 00:04:43,350 His gentle and worried expression 22 00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:46,350 gives his physiognomy a certain melancholy. 23 00:04:49,910 --> 00:04:53,350 To everyone he seems taciturn or shifty. 24 00:04:56,670 --> 00:04:58,670 The facial expressions lack spontaneity, 25 00:05:00,270 --> 00:05:01,910 one might even say candour , 26 00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:04,350 if he hadn't been the first to inform us 27 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:07,830 of his former habit of controlling and hiding his emotions. 28 00:05:10,670 --> 00:05:14,880 "It is when I am tormented by my thoughts of murder," he tells us, 29 00:05:15,670 --> 00:05:17,910 "that I am calmest and quietest." 30 00:05:22,830 --> 00:05:25,030 You know why we are here, don't you? 31 00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:31,270 You want to know whether I'm sick or not. 32 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:34,790 What is your opinion of the matter? 33 00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:39,320 I am not crazy. 34 00:05:41,550 --> 00:05:42,830 I don't want to be. 35 00:05:45,150 --> 00:05:47,120 My classmates who call me crazy, 36 00:05:48,230 --> 00:05:50,350 I could no longer tell them otherwise. 37 00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:55,350 There is something I can't quite grasp. 38 00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:59,560 During the first investigation, the experts' report was very clear. 39 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:00,710 I'll read it again. 40 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:07,880 "Bruno Reidal is abnormal 41 00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:11,000 with regard to satisfying the sexual instinct. 42 00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:12,960 "A bloodthirsty sadist, 43 00:06:13,030 --> 00:06:15,910 "but sadism implies neither irresponsibility 44 00:06:16,350 --> 00:06:17,670 nor madness." 45 00:06:21,590 --> 00:06:23,760 So why challenge that report 46 00:06:23,830 --> 00:06:25,910 since it affirms you are not mad? 47 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:30,880 They misrepresented what I said. 48 00:06:33,030 --> 00:06:35,760 They made me sound like a hardened criminal. 49 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:40,590 If I understand properly, 50 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,470 you don't want to be considered 51 00:06:43,550 --> 00:06:44,590 either insane 52 00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:48,120 or criminal. Is that so? 53 00:06:50,670 --> 00:06:53,150 Yet you're not here for no reason, are you? 54 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:54,760 You did kill 55 00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:57,030 an innocent child. 56 00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:00,150 By cutting off his head. 57 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:03,000 Have you nothing to say? 58 00:07:06,440 --> 00:07:07,350 Bruno, 59 00:07:08,350 --> 00:07:09,350 look at me. 60 00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:16,270 We've been told you were an excellent student 61 00:07:16,830 --> 00:07:18,880 and a very hard worker. 62 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:22,640 I'd like you to do a job for me. 63 00:07:23,910 --> 00:07:28,080 A job I sometimes ask of those who seem sincere, honest, and intelligent. 64 00:07:29,350 --> 00:07:33,790 I'd like you to write your life story. Your memoirs, so to speak. 65 00:07:34,910 --> 00:07:38,470 If you could express in your own words what is in your head, 66 00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:41,440 that would help us understand you. 67 00:07:44,550 --> 00:07:46,320 What should I write? 68 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:48,590 Everything. 69 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:51,830 You'll have to tell us the whole truth. 70 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:55,320 We are not your judges, we must know everything. 71 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:45,670 Information about my family 72 00:08:57,760 --> 00:09:00,910 I was born in Raulhac, in the Cantal, 73 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:03,760 on June 12, 1888. 74 00:09:06,430 --> 00:09:09,030 I remember that during my early years 75 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:11,640 I lived with my parents, my grandparents, 76 00:09:12,150 --> 00:09:13,910 and my brothers and sisters. 77 00:09:35,120 --> 00:09:38,150 My parents married in 1871. 78 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:43,270 My father was 32 then, and my mother 25. 79 00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:02,120 Six children were born to that marriage, 80 00:10:03,150 --> 00:10:04,240 all living. 81 00:10:29,310 --> 00:10:31,640 Marie, the eldest, 82 00:10:32,430 --> 00:10:34,030 is now 34. 83 00:10:35,190 --> 00:10:36,550 She has had four children. 84 00:10:37,910 --> 00:10:42,070 The first one died in Raulhac, at our home, at the age of a few months. 85 00:10:47,030 --> 00:10:49,000 Second child, Antoine: 86 00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:51,760 lives in Paris and runs a restaurant. 87 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:57,720 In 1900 he had thoughts of suicide and persecution. 88 00:11:06,150 --> 00:11:07,760 You may be seated. 89 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,000 The Lord Jesus 90 00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:19,030 showed us God's love 91 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:21,030 for children and infants. 92 00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:24,270 Forbid them not to come unto me... 93 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:27,000 Third child: Joseph. 94 00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:31,400 Currently a soldier in a line infantry. 95 00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:35,000 He would punch his classmates and beat animals. 96 00:11:45,150 --> 00:11:46,640 Eugénie, 23. 97 00:11:48,950 --> 00:11:51,840 She is unmarried and still lives with my mother in Raulhac. 98 00:11:53,030 --> 00:11:54,190 She was anaemic. 99 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:57,670 She has had nervous episodes and serious illnesses. 100 00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:03,520 The youngest, Jules, is 13. 101 00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:05,790 Cheeky and sly, 102 00:12:06,400 --> 00:12:08,910 for him, every means to success is good. 103 00:12:19,430 --> 00:12:21,790 My mother, Marie Ramond, 104 00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:24,150 born August 15, 1846, 105 00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:27,910 was in her youth apparently strong-tempered. 106 00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:33,910 She is quick to anger, very touchy and sensitive. 107 00:12:35,670 --> 00:12:36,760 Give me your knife. 108 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:39,520 Look. 109 00:12:39,910 --> 00:12:41,430 You think we can peel so thick? 110 00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:43,880 She would beat us violently. 111 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:48,070 Rarely did she stroke or kiss us. 112 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,720 "You will do exactly" she would tell us, 113 00:13:05,190 --> 00:13:07,400 "what you say you don't want to do. 114 00:13:08,270 --> 00:13:10,790 "I learned early on to work and to suffer. 115 00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:12,790 It will be the same for you." 116 00:13:29,190 --> 00:13:30,520 Put it in the shade. 117 00:13:33,310 --> 00:13:37,150 My father Jean-Marie, born in 1839, 118 00:13:37,880 --> 00:13:41,120 was a man of medium build with a full beard. 119 00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:49,150 Watch. Later, you'll do it yourself. 120 00:13:52,070 --> 00:13:53,120 You're watching? 121 00:13:53,190 --> 00:13:56,070 He was intelligent and had some schooling. 122 00:13:57,790 --> 00:14:01,000 He had the reputation of a very good man and a fine peasant. 123 00:14:01,070 --> 00:14:02,000 I cut off the knots. 124 00:14:04,550 --> 00:14:05,550 So it's smooth. 125 00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:10,070 And to finish, you make a little cove. 126 00:14:11,190 --> 00:14:12,310 It's more comfortable. 127 00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:16,480 He would go to the inn. 128 00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:18,640 At home he often drank brandy. 129 00:14:25,120 --> 00:14:26,240 Here, it's yours. 130 00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,030 Go and try it. 131 00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:32,550 I don't know what illnesses he had, 132 00:14:32,640 --> 00:14:34,190 or what illness he died of. 133 00:14:39,840 --> 00:14:42,640 He'd thrash us, but less violently than our mother. 134 00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:45,430 - You like it? - Yes. 135 00:14:46,950 --> 00:14:47,880 Good. 136 00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:49,240 He was gentler, 137 00:14:49,670 --> 00:14:51,950 and more loved by my siblings and me. 138 00:15:14,030 --> 00:15:14,950 One day, 139 00:15:16,070 --> 00:15:19,000 in very fine weather with a hot sun for the season, 140 00:15:19,550 --> 00:15:21,910 I went to guard our cows in a field. 141 00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:36,550 I had no cap with me 142 00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:39,310 and I was bare-headed for quite a while. 143 00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:21,030 After that sunstroke, 144 00:16:22,070 --> 00:16:24,120 I was bedridden for a fortnight. 145 00:16:27,270 --> 00:16:29,030 I don't know if I was delirious. 146 00:16:30,310 --> 00:16:32,520 But I certainly was so ill 147 00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:33,720 Any pain? 148 00:16:33,790 --> 00:16:35,880 That my parents feared I would die. 149 00:16:53,840 --> 00:16:57,070 It is certain that it was not a result of that illness 150 00:16:57,150 --> 00:16:59,360 that I had my first thoughts of murder. 151 00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:02,360 I'd already had them the winter before. 152 00:17:14,430 --> 00:17:15,360 Our family, 153 00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:18,320 like all of our neighbours, 154 00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:21,190 killed a pig every year. 155 00:17:42,950 --> 00:17:44,800 He'll calm down. 156 00:18:08,430 --> 00:18:10,190 I was glad to see a pig killed. 157 00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:13,750 Not to see it bleed, because when we bled it, 158 00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:15,880 I'd run away when I heard it squeal. 159 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:19,150 I was glad because after bleeding it, 160 00:18:19,950 --> 00:18:20,910 we'd burn it, 161 00:18:21,470 --> 00:18:22,400 butcher it, 162 00:18:23,150 --> 00:18:25,510 make sausages, and even have a party. 163 00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:45,910 To the pig's health! 164 00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:49,880 He was one good pig. 165 00:18:51,190 --> 00:18:52,670 And fat, too. 166 00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:55,510 We killed the pig by bleeding it, 167 00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:58,840 and in my child's imagination, 168 00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:00,800 killing meant bleeding. 169 00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:04,560 Then one day, 170 00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:08,600 I heard my parents say someone had killed a man. 171 00:19:10,510 --> 00:19:11,910 And I thought to myself: 172 00:19:13,230 --> 00:19:14,560 are men killed too? 173 00:19:16,470 --> 00:19:17,510 Like pigs? 174 00:19:33,360 --> 00:19:34,280 At night, 175 00:19:34,990 --> 00:19:35,910 in bed, 176 00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:38,710 before going to sleep, 177 00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:43,880 I pictured myself hurting the boys my age 178 00:19:44,990 --> 00:19:47,280 with whom I often found myself. 179 00:19:50,670 --> 00:19:53,880 I thought I'd take great pleasure in striking them with a knife. 180 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,840 Not with the aim of killing them: 181 00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:59,040 whether they died was irrelevant. 182 00:20:00,950 --> 00:20:03,430 But I thought I would enjoy torturing them. 183 00:20:03,510 --> 00:20:05,360 Average, as is your wont. 184 00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:07,710 I fear you will linger there forever. 185 00:20:12,190 --> 00:20:14,560 In second place our dear shaker, Reidal. 186 00:20:15,360 --> 00:20:16,280 9 out of 10. 187 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:19,880 - Can you read that for me? - 11. 188 00:20:19,950 --> 00:20:20,950 I couldn't. 189 00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:23,400 With better penmanship you could be first. 190 00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:25,640 Improve that, it's illegible. 191 00:20:27,430 --> 00:20:28,360 First: 192 00:20:28,670 --> 00:20:30,880 Deslauriers Emile. 10 out of 10. 193 00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:32,320 Keep it up. 194 00:20:39,150 --> 00:20:40,910 We will now do a dictation. 195 00:20:50,910 --> 00:20:52,950 - Can I play? - There's enough of us. 196 00:21:19,470 --> 00:21:20,560 When I was ten, 197 00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:23,600 I lost my beloved father. 198 00:21:30,750 --> 00:21:31,670 For a long time, 199 00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:34,040 even while dreaming at night, 200 00:21:34,990 --> 00:21:36,990 even now after seven years, 201 00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:39,120 I cry when I remember 202 00:21:39,190 --> 00:21:42,910 my mother leading us to his deathbed, 203 00:21:43,910 --> 00:21:44,840 telling us: 204 00:21:46,190 --> 00:21:47,950 "Kiss him, poor children, 205 00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:50,990 it will be the last time." 206 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:01,560 Dammit Bruno, what are you doing? 207 00:23:01,910 --> 00:23:03,510 Hurry it up! 208 00:23:21,510 --> 00:23:23,120 Tomorrow at dawn, 209 00:23:23,190 --> 00:23:25,560 when the countryside whitens, I will set out. 210 00:23:26,430 --> 00:23:28,320 You see, I know that you wait for me. 211 00:23:28,950 --> 00:23:31,880 I will go by the forest, I will go by the mountain. 212 00:23:31,950 --> 00:23:34,280 I can no longer remain far from you... 213 00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:41,360 I remember that one day, 214 00:23:42,430 --> 00:23:43,600 in primary school, 215 00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:48,040 I felt the desire to kill more keenly. 216 00:23:56,600 --> 00:23:59,190 One of my schoolmates stood up, 217 00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:00,880 and I had him in front of me. 218 00:24:02,150 --> 00:24:03,750 Very good, Emile. Sit down. 219 00:24:13,470 --> 00:24:17,470 My desire to kill him made itself felt so strongly 220 00:24:17,560 --> 00:24:19,600 that I thought, sooner or later, 221 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:22,430 this need to kill 222 00:24:23,360 --> 00:24:25,990 which should bring me such great pleasure 223 00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:27,400 would have to be satisfied. 224 00:24:28,510 --> 00:24:30,320 And I thought as I looked at him: 225 00:24:31,950 --> 00:24:33,640 "You shall not grow old." 226 00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:52,800 Your turn, Louis. 227 00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:56,320 Here, you hit it, you get to keep it. 228 00:24:57,190 --> 00:24:58,320 Your turn, Pierre. 229 00:25:04,150 --> 00:25:05,150 You're cheating... 230 00:25:11,670 --> 00:25:12,880 You're hurting me. 231 00:25:14,750 --> 00:25:16,320 Stop or we'll tell. 232 00:25:45,710 --> 00:25:47,600 Have you ever tortured an animal? 233 00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:54,510 I don't think so. 234 00:25:59,230 --> 00:26:00,560 Oh yes, once. 235 00:26:02,750 --> 00:26:05,150 I stepped on a lamb in a sheepfold. 236 00:26:05,880 --> 00:26:07,470 - Did you kill it? - No. 237 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,800 - Did you get pleasure from it? - No. 238 00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:15,360 I tend to feel sorry for the poor beasts. 239 00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:31,750 Bruno, 240 00:26:32,950 --> 00:26:34,950 have you ever wanted to kill a girl? 241 00:26:38,910 --> 00:26:39,840 No. 242 00:26:41,640 --> 00:26:44,080 It started in school, 243 00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:47,430 it was some of my schoolmates that I wanted to kill. 244 00:26:48,750 --> 00:26:50,600 So from age 6 or 7? 245 00:26:51,430 --> 00:26:52,360 From age 6. 246 00:26:56,230 --> 00:26:57,150 Bruno, 247 00:26:57,600 --> 00:26:59,670 are you attracted to girls or boys? 248 00:27:06,710 --> 00:27:07,640 I don't know. 249 00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:11,560 Do you remember at what age you started masturbating? 250 00:27:15,150 --> 00:27:17,040 I'd rather write it down for you. 251 00:27:38,510 --> 00:27:39,430 Hey, kid. 252 00:27:40,750 --> 00:27:41,670 Got any wine? 253 00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:45,950 - I have milk. - What? 254 00:27:46,400 --> 00:27:47,320 I have milk. 255 00:27:49,230 --> 00:27:50,150 Ok, gimme some. 256 00:28:23,950 --> 00:28:25,080 You're all alone here. 257 00:28:27,360 --> 00:28:28,510 No, I was hired out. 258 00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:32,600 Hired out to who? 259 00:28:35,230 --> 00:28:36,150 The Lacombes. 260 00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:41,360 The Lacombes... 261 00:28:43,150 --> 00:28:44,150 Do you know them? 262 00:28:51,230 --> 00:28:52,670 You're not from around here. 263 00:28:54,230 --> 00:28:55,600 Where are you from? 264 00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:58,190 From Raulhac. 265 00:29:00,360 --> 00:29:01,320 What's your name? 266 00:29:02,750 --> 00:29:03,670 Reidal. 267 00:29:04,670 --> 00:29:05,640 Reidal what? 268 00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:07,190 Reidal Bruno. 269 00:29:08,360 --> 00:29:09,280 One day, 270 00:29:09,710 --> 00:29:11,080 I met a shepherd, 271 00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:13,950 and he forced me to the ground 272 00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:16,430 and against my will started masturbating me. 273 00:29:27,430 --> 00:29:28,360 Hot, isn't it? 274 00:29:32,910 --> 00:29:34,280 - Lie down. - I have to go, sir. 275 00:29:35,670 --> 00:29:37,950 - I told you to lie down. - Stop it, sir... 276 00:29:38,430 --> 00:29:39,430 Stop. 277 00:29:43,910 --> 00:29:44,910 Leave me alone. 278 00:29:45,430 --> 00:29:46,430 Stop moving. 279 00:29:46,840 --> 00:29:48,840 Sir, please stop, you're hurting me. 280 00:29:48,910 --> 00:29:51,190 Stop squirming or I'll really hurt you. 281 00:29:56,360 --> 00:29:58,750 Let's see if you're a good mountain shepherd. 282 00:30:01,510 --> 00:30:02,430 There you go. 283 00:30:04,190 --> 00:30:05,120 Sir... 284 00:30:08,190 --> 00:30:09,360 Stop struggling! 285 00:30:11,990 --> 00:30:12,910 That's good. 286 00:30:14,800 --> 00:30:15,880 That's good... 287 00:30:15,950 --> 00:30:16,880 Sir... 288 00:30:31,750 --> 00:30:32,910 After a while 289 00:30:33,750 --> 00:30:36,360 I stopped struggling and I reached orgasm. 290 00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:56,430 Henceforth I knew how to masturbate. 291 00:31:20,280 --> 00:31:22,670 Here you are already! 292 00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:25,280 What a mess he is! 293 00:31:26,470 --> 00:31:28,040 Go change your clothes! 294 00:31:37,950 --> 00:31:38,880 At first 295 00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:43,080 I masturbated rarely, if ever. 296 00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:46,670 I wasn't able to ejaculate, 297 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:50,600 and had great difficulty achieving orgasm. 298 00:32:52,470 --> 00:32:53,400 One day, 299 00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:56,990 while I was masturbating and couldn't orgasm, 300 00:32:58,150 --> 00:33:00,670 the thought of murder came to me by chance. 301 00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:25,320 During the following months, 302 00:33:27,150 --> 00:33:28,360 I masturbated often, 303 00:33:29,670 --> 00:33:30,880 several times a day, 304 00:33:31,710 --> 00:33:34,800 imagining myself killing one or another of my classmates. 305 00:33:38,710 --> 00:33:41,120 If I felt pleasure coming, I would stop. 306 00:33:43,430 --> 00:33:46,510 Then start again imagining another classmate. 307 00:33:47,710 --> 00:33:50,840 And I would make the pleasure last from five to ten minutes. 308 00:33:57,430 --> 00:33:59,510 To be tempted to kill a person, 309 00:34:00,430 --> 00:34:03,880 he had to meet several conditions that I will try to list. 310 00:34:05,840 --> 00:34:06,750 First, 311 00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:08,470 I had to know him, 312 00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:11,510 to have spent some time with him. 313 00:34:13,240 --> 00:34:15,510 He had to have a pleasant physiognomy, 314 00:34:16,240 --> 00:34:17,880 considerable intelligence, 315 00:34:18,910 --> 00:34:22,360 and a certain pride in his gait, behaviour, and gestures. 316 00:34:26,910 --> 00:34:29,550 And then I killed him, but as if regretfully, 317 00:34:30,070 --> 00:34:32,800 because I loved him but could not do otherwise. 318 00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:43,160 You never say explicitly. 319 00:34:43,240 --> 00:34:47,030 Did the desire to kill give you an erection, or the contrary? 320 00:34:48,320 --> 00:34:50,430 I would imagine myself killing someone. 321 00:34:51,950 --> 00:34:53,950 It was after that I got an erection. 322 00:34:55,160 --> 00:34:57,550 And did you ever dream about murder? 323 00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:00,200 Yes, often. 324 00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:02,160 Did it give you pleasure? 325 00:35:03,590 --> 00:35:04,510 Yes. 326 00:35:05,030 --> 00:35:08,630 How did that manifest itself? Did you ejaculate in your sleep? 327 00:35:12,910 --> 00:35:16,030 No one ever noticed you were masturbating so often? 328 00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:18,320 I don't know. 329 00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:22,880 Have you ever masturbated with someone else? 330 00:35:23,470 --> 00:35:24,880 No, that would disgust me. 331 00:35:26,110 --> 00:35:29,110 Not even at the seminary or with one of your brothers? 332 00:35:29,200 --> 00:35:30,470 No, I said no. 333 00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:38,430 Are you still masturbating here, in prison? 334 00:35:43,240 --> 00:35:45,880 - When was the last time? - None of your business. 335 00:35:46,800 --> 00:35:48,110 We need to know everything. 336 00:35:48,630 --> 00:35:51,760 If any of our questions make you angry, so be it. 337 00:35:53,210 --> 00:35:57,120 We aren't here to please you. So now answer the question. 338 00:35:57,730 --> 00:35:59,610 - When did you masturb... - I don't remember. 339 00:36:01,380 --> 00:36:03,050 You don't remember 340 00:36:03,860 --> 00:36:05,610 or you don't want to remember? 341 00:36:08,050 --> 00:36:12,170 You do remember that you fell from a window at age 3 and a half, 342 00:36:12,260 --> 00:36:15,260 that the weather was cloudy that very day, 343 00:36:15,340 --> 00:36:17,340 maybe even a bit rainy... 344 00:36:17,420 --> 00:36:19,570 Your memories of that are very accurate. 345 00:36:20,860 --> 00:36:23,530 But you don't recall your last masturbation? 346 00:36:24,130 --> 00:36:25,820 Bruno, please answer. 347 00:36:26,650 --> 00:36:29,730 We know you don't like to talk about it, but it's important. 348 00:36:30,380 --> 00:36:31,300 You have to tell. 349 00:36:37,210 --> 00:36:38,820 It's been 2 months and 13 days. 350 00:36:39,500 --> 00:36:40,420 Pardon? 351 00:36:40,860 --> 00:36:43,380 We can't hear you. Speak up, articulate. 352 00:36:46,050 --> 00:36:47,820 It's been 2 months and 13 days. 353 00:37:01,010 --> 00:37:02,340 Other than us, 354 00:37:02,900 --> 00:37:05,420 have you ever spoken about this to anyone else? 355 00:37:05,500 --> 00:37:06,420 About what? 356 00:37:09,010 --> 00:37:10,570 About masturbating, 357 00:37:11,300 --> 00:37:13,780 your thoughts of murder, your dreams... 358 00:37:16,050 --> 00:37:17,820 About my dreams, no. 359 00:37:21,260 --> 00:37:23,300 I never thought it was really a sin. 360 00:37:25,300 --> 00:37:26,210 And the rest of it? 361 00:37:27,860 --> 00:37:30,130 I started talking about it last year. 362 00:37:31,260 --> 00:37:32,380 At Easter time. 363 00:37:33,050 --> 00:37:36,130 I will see her one day 364 00:37:37,010 --> 00:37:40,170 In heaven, in her fatherland 365 00:37:41,050 --> 00:37:43,780 Yes, I will see Mary 366 00:37:44,900 --> 00:37:48,130 In her heavenly home 367 00:37:48,900 --> 00:37:52,570 In heaven, in heaven... 368 00:37:53,090 --> 00:37:55,780 I will see her one day 369 00:37:59,420 --> 00:38:01,050 In April 1904, 370 00:38:01,730 --> 00:38:04,300 a mission came to my parish in Raulhac. 371 00:38:11,090 --> 00:38:13,260 I resolved to take the opportunity 372 00:38:13,340 --> 00:38:15,690 to put my conscience in order, 373 00:38:16,730 --> 00:38:20,300 and I went to confess to the priest who was preaching the mission, 374 00:38:20,380 --> 00:38:23,420 who was the superior of the minor seminary of Saint-Flour. 375 00:38:58,380 --> 00:39:00,420 What do you mean by bad thoughts? 376 00:39:02,050 --> 00:39:02,980 I have 377 00:39:06,420 --> 00:39:07,860 hateful thoughts. 378 00:39:10,570 --> 00:39:11,610 Sometimes I... 379 00:39:13,340 --> 00:39:14,900 I almost want to kill them. 380 00:39:17,730 --> 00:39:20,650 - What did these classmates do to you? - Nothing. 381 00:39:22,130 --> 00:39:23,050 Nothing at all. 382 00:39:26,460 --> 00:39:27,380 What else? 383 00:39:31,170 --> 00:39:33,420 Despite myself I commit acts of impurity. 384 00:39:34,050 --> 00:39:35,780 - Regularly? - Yes, often. 385 00:39:39,940 --> 00:39:41,340 I sometimes tell myself 386 00:39:44,900 --> 00:39:46,340 that I'll never be able 387 00:39:47,570 --> 00:39:48,610 to resist. 388 00:39:51,780 --> 00:39:54,260 So to stop committing the sin, 389 00:39:54,340 --> 00:39:56,860 to stop having these thoughts, 390 00:39:57,820 --> 00:39:59,500 maybe I have to kill myself. 391 00:40:03,170 --> 00:40:05,010 Suicide is a grave sin, Bruno. 392 00:40:05,900 --> 00:40:07,500 Perhaps the gravest of all. 393 00:40:08,170 --> 00:40:11,500 It is refusing the gift of life that God has given us. 394 00:40:12,980 --> 00:40:14,690 It blasphemes His divine creation. 395 00:40:15,570 --> 00:40:18,570 All suicides suffer eternal damnation. 396 00:40:18,650 --> 00:40:20,420 - You know that. - Yes, Father. 397 00:40:21,860 --> 00:40:23,210 Listen well, my son. 398 00:40:24,300 --> 00:40:25,780 I believe 399 00:40:25,860 --> 00:40:27,780 you know right from wrong. 400 00:40:27,860 --> 00:40:31,570 That's the best way to fight these sins, which are very grave. 401 00:40:32,210 --> 00:40:35,780 Pray to God to save you and He will do it. 402 00:40:35,860 --> 00:40:37,010 But Father, 403 00:40:37,090 --> 00:40:39,690 every day I fight against these thoughts, 404 00:40:39,780 --> 00:40:42,730 every day I pray, but the thoughts return. 405 00:40:42,820 --> 00:40:44,610 You have to fight harder. 406 00:40:45,780 --> 00:40:47,260 Each of us must struggle. 407 00:40:47,650 --> 00:40:50,340 Our Lord himself was tempted by the devil, 408 00:40:50,420 --> 00:40:51,650 but defeated him. 409 00:40:54,900 --> 00:40:56,090 Perhaps 410 00:40:57,980 --> 00:41:02,260 your greatest sin is to see everything a little too darkly, don't you think? 411 00:41:03,010 --> 00:41:03,940 Yes, Father. 412 00:41:07,980 --> 00:41:09,170 How old are you? 413 00:41:10,170 --> 00:41:12,340 15. I'll be 16 soon. 414 00:41:13,570 --> 00:41:15,090 And you say you pray every day. 415 00:41:15,780 --> 00:41:18,170 Yes, Father. Morning and evening. 416 00:41:21,010 --> 00:41:22,780 And you have a taste for school. 417 00:41:23,210 --> 00:41:25,340 I've always been first in my class. 418 00:41:26,860 --> 00:41:27,780 Tell me, Bruno. 419 00:41:30,380 --> 00:41:34,210 Have you even felt a vocation to become a priest? 420 00:41:37,820 --> 00:41:38,730 A priest? 421 00:41:42,340 --> 00:41:43,650 I've never thought about it. 422 00:42:01,340 --> 00:42:02,260 At first 423 00:42:03,210 --> 00:42:05,300 I wasn't thinking about becoming a priest. 424 00:42:07,570 --> 00:42:09,610 But I believed that in a seminary 425 00:42:09,690 --> 00:42:12,050 I would be much safer from myself. 426 00:42:18,340 --> 00:42:20,980 The thought of being a priest appealed to me. 427 00:42:21,530 --> 00:42:23,050 Not to live comfortably, 428 00:42:23,130 --> 00:42:25,690 to be paid well, and to work little, 429 00:42:26,300 --> 00:42:29,210 but I would have been happy to lead an orderly, 430 00:42:30,300 --> 00:42:31,210 holy, 431 00:42:31,610 --> 00:42:32,610 penitent life, 432 00:42:32,690 --> 00:42:35,210 free from disorder and sin. 433 00:42:39,340 --> 00:42:40,650 Thank you, my Lord. 434 00:42:42,130 --> 00:42:43,050 Thank you. 435 00:42:44,460 --> 00:42:46,300 I am at present entirely yours. 436 00:42:48,570 --> 00:42:49,780 I will sin no more. 437 00:42:51,210 --> 00:42:52,130 Never again. 438 00:42:54,420 --> 00:42:56,900 Let me find peace at the seminary, please. 439 00:43:00,500 --> 00:43:02,300 I hope my father is with you. 440 00:43:05,820 --> 00:43:06,730 Amen. 441 00:43:35,860 --> 00:43:36,780 Blondel? 442 00:43:37,650 --> 00:43:38,650 What time is it? 443 00:43:45,010 --> 00:43:46,300 25 minutes to 3. 444 00:43:47,900 --> 00:43:48,820 Thank you. 445 00:43:51,210 --> 00:43:52,420 Do we arrive soon? 446 00:43:53,460 --> 00:43:54,900 In a little under two hours. 447 00:44:07,050 --> 00:44:09,940 The cost of education was too high for my family, 448 00:44:10,530 --> 00:44:14,820 but a wealthy landlord in Raulhac agreed to pay my fees for us. 449 00:44:17,500 --> 00:44:19,980 And so it was decided that I would study 450 00:44:20,050 --> 00:44:22,010 at the minor seminary of Saint-Flour. 451 00:44:37,530 --> 00:44:38,610 Hello, Father. 452 00:44:53,730 --> 00:44:55,900 Blondel and Langlois, show him the dormitory. 453 00:44:55,980 --> 00:44:56,900 Yes, Father. 454 00:45:03,010 --> 00:45:04,130 Stand up straight. 455 00:45:07,130 --> 00:45:09,170 Did you study over the summer? 456 00:45:09,690 --> 00:45:11,650 Ready for the new school year? 457 00:45:12,420 --> 00:45:13,340 Very good. 458 00:45:20,170 --> 00:45:23,340 When I first got to the seminary, I was very much behind. 459 00:45:27,860 --> 00:45:30,570 I had never studied Latin or Greek. 460 00:45:33,650 --> 00:45:36,090 Having been the best in primary school, 461 00:45:36,860 --> 00:45:39,820 I believed my intelligence to be completely superior. 462 00:45:41,500 --> 00:45:45,780 I'd never thought the other students would all be very intelligent, 463 00:45:47,010 --> 00:45:49,050 and that to make up for lost time 464 00:45:49,130 --> 00:45:52,500 I'd have to rely less on my intelligence than on hard work. 465 00:47:34,690 --> 00:47:36,460 I would like to welcome 466 00:47:36,530 --> 00:47:40,010 those who are joining us here this year. 467 00:47:47,130 --> 00:47:50,780 "He who lives by the rule lives by God." 468 00:47:52,050 --> 00:47:54,530 If you understand that, you understand the essential. 469 00:47:56,010 --> 00:47:59,050 We expect from you an abiding taste for study, 470 00:47:59,500 --> 00:48:01,460 total obedience to your teachers 471 00:48:02,380 --> 00:48:04,610 and respect for your fellow students. 472 00:48:05,940 --> 00:48:10,010 You must now think of the entire minor seminary of Saint-Flour 473 00:48:10,900 --> 00:48:12,460 as your new family. 474 00:48:14,650 --> 00:48:16,300 And now, let us pray. 475 00:49:01,530 --> 00:49:02,500 Silence! 476 00:49:32,340 --> 00:49:33,460 Move closer together. 477 00:49:35,170 --> 00:49:36,300 A little closer. 478 00:49:38,170 --> 00:49:41,210 I was the only boy whose fees were paid by charity. 479 00:49:42,340 --> 00:49:43,690 Always poorly dressed, 480 00:49:44,210 --> 00:49:45,130 gauche, 481 00:49:45,530 --> 00:49:48,300 scrawny, and expressing myself with difficulty... 482 00:49:51,420 --> 00:49:52,980 I was dark and lonely. 483 00:49:58,730 --> 00:50:02,010 As for my schoolmates, they all enjoyed wealth, 484 00:50:02,500 --> 00:50:03,420 pride, 485 00:50:03,900 --> 00:50:05,210 physical beauty, 486 00:50:06,050 --> 00:50:07,570 ease of speech, 487 00:50:08,210 --> 00:50:09,690 boldness, and joie de vivre. 488 00:50:17,130 --> 00:50:18,730 Look at the lens. 489 00:50:24,010 --> 00:50:25,530 How I resented them! 490 00:50:27,500 --> 00:50:29,860 How I would gladly have made them suffer! 491 00:50:32,010 --> 00:50:35,690 How I would have liked to deprive them of their enjoyable life! 492 00:50:43,340 --> 00:50:45,500 But killing them would have been too simple. 493 00:50:47,780 --> 00:50:50,210 I had to subjugate them, humiliate them, 494 00:50:51,940 --> 00:50:54,820 shred their beautiful clothes and faces, 495 00:50:57,820 --> 00:51:00,500 see them humble and obedient under the knife, 496 00:51:01,300 --> 00:51:03,570 torture them, behead them. 497 00:51:56,300 --> 00:51:58,500 How did you resist for a whole year? 498 00:52:03,210 --> 00:52:04,170 I studied hard. 499 00:52:23,460 --> 00:52:25,130 My classmates made fun of me 500 00:52:25,210 --> 00:52:28,900 when I told them I wanted to get through three classes in one year. 501 00:52:34,820 --> 00:52:36,050 They said I was mad. 502 00:52:50,570 --> 00:52:53,500 "That Reidal, who never plays with the others, 503 00:52:53,570 --> 00:52:55,340 "who doesn't want a holiday, 504 00:52:55,900 --> 00:52:59,260 "who spends his breaks walking alone in the yard... 505 00:53:06,300 --> 00:53:08,210 "He's not mean, Reidal. 506 00:53:08,300 --> 00:53:10,010 "He's a bit mousy. 507 00:53:11,300 --> 00:53:14,460 "Even if he is taciturn, his conversation is cheerful. 508 00:53:15,090 --> 00:53:16,820 "He is quick with a joke. 509 00:53:18,300 --> 00:53:19,940 Reidal is a pretty good fellow." 510 00:53:34,170 --> 00:53:36,530 Were you happy at the seminary? 511 00:53:41,420 --> 00:53:42,900 When my studies went well, 512 00:53:46,530 --> 00:53:49,570 and I didn't have to fight too hard against my inclinations, 513 00:53:51,900 --> 00:53:53,210 I thought myself happy. 514 00:55:01,730 --> 00:55:03,050 At the end of the year, 515 00:55:03,130 --> 00:55:05,050 my success was beyond all expectations. 516 00:55:06,090 --> 00:55:07,210 I received seven prizes: 517 00:55:08,690 --> 00:55:10,900 1st in Religious Instruction, 518 00:55:10,980 --> 00:55:12,690 2nd in Excellence, 519 00:55:12,780 --> 00:55:14,340 1st in Greek translation, 520 00:55:14,650 --> 00:55:16,210 1st in Natural History, 521 00:55:16,820 --> 00:55:18,780 1st in History and Geography, 522 00:55:19,170 --> 00:55:20,650 2nd in Mathematics, 523 00:55:21,300 --> 00:55:23,260 2nd in Quarterly exams. 524 00:55:26,530 --> 00:55:28,730 Inwardly, I was swollen with pride. 525 00:55:42,650 --> 00:55:43,570 Alas, 526 00:55:44,530 --> 00:55:46,340 when I saw myself attain a goal 527 00:55:46,420 --> 00:55:48,090 I had longed for, 528 00:55:49,300 --> 00:55:51,940 and in which I had seen all of my happiness, 529 00:55:53,730 --> 00:55:58,090 I was suddenly disgusted to see my life without any difficulty to overcome. 530 00:55:59,380 --> 00:56:01,820 Come children. Let's hurry. 531 00:56:03,940 --> 00:56:06,500 Then I saw existence as something bland. 532 00:56:07,210 --> 00:56:08,650 Enjoy the holiday, Odoul. 533 00:56:09,570 --> 00:56:10,500 You too. 534 00:56:12,260 --> 00:56:14,500 Something empty and monotonous. 535 00:56:14,570 --> 00:56:16,530 - Good-bye, Bruno. - Good-bye, Jean. 536 00:56:17,260 --> 00:56:19,010 Something I'd had enough of. 537 00:56:24,090 --> 00:56:26,460 I was overcome with a great languor. 538 00:56:31,050 --> 00:56:32,570 I wished no longer to live. 539 00:57:40,650 --> 00:57:43,090 Ma, Eugénie! Bruno's here! 540 00:58:31,650 --> 00:58:35,300 Gentlemen, my apologies, there was an emergency at the asylum. 541 00:58:51,690 --> 00:58:53,130 It's alright, I'm ready. 542 00:58:57,820 --> 00:59:01,210 So, we were at the holidays that preceded the crime. 543 00:59:01,780 --> 00:59:04,610 You wrote that you held them in great fear. 544 00:59:06,260 --> 00:59:07,530 Can you explain why? 545 00:59:08,780 --> 00:59:11,860 Surely you were tired after your year at the seminary. 546 00:59:11,940 --> 00:59:12,860 That's true. 547 00:59:14,260 --> 00:59:15,300 I was exhausted. 548 00:59:17,300 --> 00:59:19,530 But during the holidays I was at home. 549 00:59:20,300 --> 00:59:21,420 I didn't do much. 550 00:59:22,940 --> 00:59:26,500 And I know that when I am idle, I am most prone to evil. 551 00:59:26,570 --> 00:59:28,530 You were tempted at the seminary, too. 552 00:59:29,090 --> 00:59:31,530 Yes, but at the seminary I was supervised. 553 00:59:32,650 --> 00:59:35,130 And that alone kept you from succumbing? 554 00:59:36,300 --> 00:59:37,210 I think so. 555 00:59:38,170 --> 00:59:39,820 And I was working really hard. 556 00:59:41,090 --> 00:59:43,610 - You had work in the summer as well. - Very little. 557 00:59:45,010 --> 00:59:48,460 My mother could not find to hire me out. 558 00:59:49,340 --> 00:59:51,730 Everyone complained about my clumsiness. 559 00:59:55,460 --> 00:59:57,050 What did you do with your time? 560 00:59:59,610 --> 01:00:02,010 I would go and guard our cows. 561 01:00:03,050 --> 01:00:07,170 Or I'd take one of my prize-books and go read it somewhere. 562 01:00:08,260 --> 01:00:09,650 You didn't do anything else? 563 01:00:13,050 --> 01:00:15,650 When there was an errand to run, I'd do it. 564 01:00:17,090 --> 01:00:18,010 Or I would 565 01:00:18,570 --> 01:00:20,980 go fetch grass for my mother's rabbits. 566 01:00:21,690 --> 01:00:24,610 Since she was sick, it was up to me. 567 01:00:26,340 --> 01:00:27,780 You didn't masturbate? 568 01:00:33,460 --> 01:00:35,050 I resisted for the first days. 569 01:00:38,340 --> 01:00:42,090 But thoughts of murder and sexual pleasures were very strong. 570 01:01:04,460 --> 01:01:05,780 Get out! 571 01:01:08,380 --> 01:01:09,780 Go on, get out, now! 572 01:01:10,300 --> 01:01:12,730 Find yourself a husband. And a job! 573 01:01:13,170 --> 01:01:15,050 That'll be one less mouth to feed! 574 01:01:15,546 --> 01:01:16,820 Ungrateful girl! 575 01:01:29,780 --> 01:01:31,380 After four or five days, 576 01:01:32,210 --> 01:01:34,530 the idea came that, no matter how much I resisted, 577 01:01:35,380 --> 01:01:38,650 I'd never be able to resist all summer, despite my will. 578 01:01:46,420 --> 01:01:48,820 I wanted to go to confession, but I didn't. 579 01:01:50,170 --> 01:01:53,500 And I continued for a fortnight to masturbate 580 01:01:54,210 --> 01:01:55,130 five, 581 01:01:55,730 --> 01:01:58,130 six, seven, eight times a day. 582 01:02:44,570 --> 01:02:46,050 I was struggling, though. 583 01:02:48,210 --> 01:02:52,570 If I hadn't tried to hold back, I would have masturbated even more. 584 01:03:04,500 --> 01:03:07,420 My aversion to sexual pleasure was such 585 01:03:07,500 --> 01:03:10,980 that I thought I would be less guilty were I to commit a crime 586 01:03:11,050 --> 01:03:13,090 that would put an end 587 01:03:13,170 --> 01:03:15,570 to this sin I indulged in every day, 588 01:03:16,090 --> 01:03:19,210 than to commit every day the sin of masturbation. 589 01:04:10,860 --> 01:04:14,780 From August 12th to 23rd, I managed to stop masturbating. 590 01:04:21,570 --> 01:04:22,500 Bruno! 591 01:04:25,170 --> 01:04:26,820 - Bruno! - What? 592 01:04:27,650 --> 01:04:28,570 Come here! 593 01:04:41,340 --> 01:04:42,460 And your parents? 594 01:04:42,530 --> 01:04:43,690 My parents are fine. 595 01:04:44,300 --> 01:04:45,820 What about your little brothers? 596 01:04:46,570 --> 01:04:49,260 One will start at the minor seminary too. 597 01:04:49,340 --> 01:04:50,260 That's good. 598 01:04:51,420 --> 01:04:52,610 Here he is, I'll leave you. 599 01:04:56,780 --> 01:04:59,260 - Hello Bruno, am I disturbing you? - No. 600 01:04:59,610 --> 01:05:00,820 What were you doing? 601 01:05:01,300 --> 01:05:02,570 I was doing the hay. 602 01:05:03,300 --> 01:05:04,300 What do you want? 603 01:05:05,130 --> 01:05:08,130 I need a Latin dictionary. Could you lend me yours? 604 01:05:10,820 --> 01:05:11,980 I'll get it for you. 605 01:05:13,340 --> 01:05:14,260 Wait here. 606 01:05:26,820 --> 01:05:28,170 You still have your shaking? 607 01:05:30,650 --> 01:05:31,570 I still get it. 608 01:05:32,860 --> 01:05:34,570 Can I get it back to you next week? 609 01:05:35,090 --> 01:05:36,730 Yes, whatever you want. 610 01:05:37,300 --> 01:05:39,090 - You won't need it? - No. 611 01:05:39,940 --> 01:05:40,860 Thank you. 612 01:05:47,940 --> 01:05:50,210 We could go for a walk together sometime. 613 01:06:45,820 --> 01:06:48,340 "God, grant me the grace to remain faithful 614 01:06:48,420 --> 01:06:50,820 "to the resolutions I will make in writing 615 01:06:51,210 --> 01:06:52,860 "to remember more easily. 616 01:06:55,210 --> 01:06:59,260 "For me, you opened paradise, and closed the infernal abyss under my feet. 617 01:06:59,570 --> 01:07:01,130 "I loved you, O my Lord. 618 01:07:06,260 --> 01:07:09,940 "But the demon seduced me with the lure of fictitious pleasure, 619 01:07:10,380 --> 01:07:12,130 "closing my eyes to the light. 620 01:07:12,210 --> 01:07:13,420 "And I listened. 621 01:07:14,860 --> 01:07:15,820 "I succumbed, 622 01:07:16,570 --> 01:07:18,690 "I betrayed you cowardly, O my Lord. 623 01:07:20,010 --> 01:07:24,380 "I consented not to see you and possess you eternally in heaven 624 01:07:24,460 --> 01:07:26,300 "in exchange for a moment of pleasure 625 01:07:26,780 --> 01:07:28,340 "and an eternity of tears. 626 01:07:30,130 --> 01:07:34,900 "What wouldn't I sacrifice to return to the moment when I succumbed? 627 01:07:35,650 --> 01:07:37,530 "But the evil has been committed. 628 01:07:38,820 --> 01:07:41,130 "There is no more hope. Oh! yes... 629 01:07:41,900 --> 01:07:44,650 "The source of your mercy is inexhaustible. 630 01:07:45,980 --> 01:07:48,860 "Forgive, O Lord. I will sin no more in the future. 631 01:07:49,210 --> 01:07:52,530 I would rather die than commit that sin again." 632 01:07:57,260 --> 01:08:00,780 Do you remember when you wrote these "solemn resolutions"? 633 01:08:04,210 --> 01:08:05,500 It was August 23rd. 634 01:08:06,460 --> 01:08:09,900 And how soon after that did you succumb again? 635 01:08:14,210 --> 01:08:15,210 That same evening. 636 01:08:18,460 --> 01:08:22,810 And that was when you wrote this in the margin: 637 01:08:24,570 --> 01:08:26,130 "impossible to fight it" 638 01:08:26,210 --> 01:08:28,690 as well as "renewed resolutions"? 639 01:08:37,730 --> 01:08:40,650 In one of your notebooks you mention suicide. 640 01:08:44,180 --> 01:08:46,570 I've thought about it since I was 13 or 14. 641 01:08:47,930 --> 01:08:50,770 In your opinion, what stopped you from doing it? 642 01:08:52,530 --> 01:08:55,730 My religion says that suicide is an irreparable sin, 643 01:08:56,340 --> 01:08:58,420 followed by eternal damnation. 644 01:08:58,770 --> 01:09:02,300 But your religion also says that homicide is a very grave sin. 645 01:09:03,100 --> 01:09:04,100 Of course. 646 01:09:05,300 --> 01:09:08,460 But you consider it less serious to kill someone else 647 01:09:08,530 --> 01:09:09,930 that to kill yourself? 648 01:09:10,020 --> 01:09:11,500 I did not say that. 649 01:09:11,570 --> 01:09:12,530 Well then? 650 01:09:13,300 --> 01:09:16,930 After you kill someone you can repent and expiate your sin. 651 01:09:18,650 --> 01:09:20,340 Whereas for suicide 652 01:09:21,210 --> 01:09:22,260 that is impossible. 653 01:09:29,020 --> 01:09:31,690 Now you will have to tell us about September 1st. 654 01:09:33,210 --> 01:09:35,050 You already know all of the details. 655 01:09:35,690 --> 01:09:37,850 It's your story that we want to hear. 656 01:09:57,380 --> 01:09:59,050 The night of September the 1st, 657 01:09:59,690 --> 01:10:03,130 I dreamt about murder and I ejaculated in my sleep. 658 01:10:11,970 --> 01:10:13,380 The following morning, 659 01:10:13,460 --> 01:10:16,260 my bloodthirsty obsessions felt quite enjoyable. 660 01:10:30,770 --> 01:10:32,770 Good morning Mrs Reidal. Am I disturbing you? 661 01:10:33,380 --> 01:10:34,610 No, what is it? 662 01:10:34,690 --> 01:10:37,420 I've come to return Bruno's dictionary. Here. 663 01:10:37,500 --> 01:10:38,530 Thank you so much. 664 01:10:39,130 --> 01:10:40,050 You're welcome. 665 01:10:41,500 --> 01:10:44,500 I'm going to go read on the boulder. Want to come with me? 666 01:10:46,570 --> 01:10:47,500 May I? 667 01:10:48,020 --> 01:10:50,260 Like you meant to do anything today? 668 01:10:54,650 --> 01:10:55,570 I'll get my book. 669 01:10:57,530 --> 01:10:59,340 Eugénie, hand me my knife. 670 01:11:48,300 --> 01:11:52,020 Ah! I thought to myself, what is the point of fighting fate? 671 01:11:52,810 --> 01:11:56,610 You're meant to be a murderer, what has to happen will happen. 672 01:11:59,380 --> 01:12:00,300 Rejoice! 673 01:12:01,050 --> 01:12:03,100 Soon you will strike Blondel down. 674 01:12:03,930 --> 01:12:05,300 Blondel, so handsome, 675 01:12:06,420 --> 01:12:08,210 so proud, so intelligent, 676 01:12:08,610 --> 01:12:10,050 he whom you love so much. 677 01:12:12,210 --> 01:12:13,300 You will hold him, 678 01:12:14,340 --> 01:12:16,610 you will possess him, kill him. 679 01:12:17,180 --> 01:12:19,690 He will be yours, yours alone. 680 01:13:22,020 --> 01:13:22,930 Is it good? 681 01:13:24,340 --> 01:13:25,260 I don't know. 682 01:13:25,970 --> 01:13:28,260 To tell you the truth, I just started it. 683 01:13:28,970 --> 01:13:31,300 Can you lend it to me when you're done? 684 01:13:32,130 --> 01:13:33,050 If you like. 685 01:13:41,850 --> 01:13:43,810 I could see his beautiful face, 686 01:13:44,650 --> 01:13:46,020 his beautiful colours. 687 01:13:51,810 --> 01:13:53,770 I saw myself cutting off his head 688 01:13:53,850 --> 01:13:55,770 and hiding it and his clothes 689 01:13:55,850 --> 01:13:59,850 so no one would know if it was him or me who had been beheaded. 690 01:14:15,020 --> 01:14:17,130 It was the beginning of September. 691 01:14:20,420 --> 01:14:23,810 There were all kinds of fruit outside that I could eat. 692 01:14:26,260 --> 01:14:28,300 I saw myself travelling South, 693 01:14:28,970 --> 01:14:30,730 towards the land of good weather. 694 01:14:31,810 --> 01:14:34,610 From there I would somehow find a way 695 01:14:34,690 --> 01:14:36,130 to embark for a colony. 696 01:14:38,530 --> 01:14:42,340 I'd go to an African mission where I'd make a general confession. 697 01:14:43,890 --> 01:14:46,420 There are those who, once the crime committed, 698 01:14:46,500 --> 01:14:48,300 give themselves up. 699 01:14:50,180 --> 01:14:51,570 How stupid they are! 700 01:14:52,890 --> 01:14:54,610 Don't you even think about that. 701 01:14:56,020 --> 01:14:58,530 You'd be very foolish to get in a state 702 01:14:58,610 --> 01:15:00,530 on a happy day like today. 703 01:15:02,810 --> 01:15:05,970 This evening you will have cut Blondel's head off 704 01:15:07,050 --> 01:15:08,570 and then you will be free. 705 01:15:10,570 --> 01:15:11,970 You will live a new life 706 01:15:12,500 --> 01:15:14,850 until the day God sends death unto you 707 01:15:14,930 --> 01:15:18,650 to free you from a life that has been nothing but a long burden 708 01:15:19,020 --> 01:15:21,530 and to give you real bliss in eternity. 709 01:15:48,100 --> 01:15:49,420 The crime was committed. 710 01:15:50,020 --> 01:15:51,970 All that remained was to enjoy it. 711 01:15:53,810 --> 01:15:55,210 I'm cold, aren't you? 712 01:15:57,260 --> 01:15:58,420 A little. 713 01:15:58,500 --> 01:16:00,530 Why don't we go back into the woods? 714 01:16:01,210 --> 01:16:02,570 There's a nice view here. 715 01:16:03,020 --> 01:16:05,050 It doesn't matter, we're reading. 716 01:16:05,530 --> 01:16:06,460 You're right. 717 01:16:07,340 --> 01:16:08,260 Let's go. 718 01:16:15,610 --> 01:16:16,850 How happy I was! 719 01:16:17,850 --> 01:16:19,210 He was entering the trap. 720 01:16:30,890 --> 01:16:32,530 The opportunity had come, 721 01:16:32,930 --> 01:16:35,020 it was time to take advantage of it. 722 01:17:00,340 --> 01:17:01,610 I'll be right back. 723 01:17:39,340 --> 01:17:41,850 He finds life beautiful and I find it awful... 724 01:17:46,130 --> 01:17:47,380 I will open his chest, 725 01:17:48,570 --> 01:17:49,810 rip his heart out, 726 01:17:50,690 --> 01:17:52,650 and take it with me in memory of him. 727 01:18:24,020 --> 01:18:26,260 Will you come back for a walk tomorrow? 728 01:18:27,100 --> 01:18:28,020 If you want. 729 01:18:29,020 --> 01:18:31,100 And what are you doing this evening? 730 01:18:32,100 --> 01:18:34,180 I'm going to Badailhac to visit my cousins. 731 01:18:35,810 --> 01:18:36,730 Oh, alright. 732 01:18:38,500 --> 01:18:40,340 So I'll see you tomorrow. 733 01:18:40,770 --> 01:18:43,260 - Shall I pick you up? - As you like. 734 01:18:58,770 --> 01:19:00,420 After masturbating, 735 01:19:00,500 --> 01:19:02,460 when I thought about killing Blondel, 736 01:19:03,210 --> 01:19:05,210 I no longer saw any pleasure in it. 737 01:19:26,610 --> 01:19:30,050 I blamed myself for masturbating and failing the crime. 738 01:19:33,770 --> 01:19:35,610 It had to be done at all cost. 739 01:19:37,210 --> 01:19:38,850 I could think of nothing else. 740 01:19:40,100 --> 01:19:41,460 I couldn't keep still . 741 01:19:48,020 --> 01:19:50,610 I felt myself compelled to get up, 742 01:19:50,690 --> 01:19:53,460 to go look for someone to kill. 743 01:19:55,770 --> 01:19:57,970 Yet I remained at the table with my family. 744 01:19:58,050 --> 01:19:59,100 What? 745 01:19:59,180 --> 01:20:00,380 How old are you now? 746 01:20:00,810 --> 01:20:02,730 - 17. - 17? 747 01:20:02,810 --> 01:20:05,180 When I was 17, I was helping my parents! 748 01:20:05,260 --> 01:20:07,850 You'll give us a hand. It won't take long. 749 01:20:09,130 --> 01:20:10,770 Toward two in the afternoon, 750 01:20:11,570 --> 01:20:14,340 I figured that in the fields or on the paths 751 01:20:14,420 --> 01:20:15,420 I would find 752 01:20:15,500 --> 01:20:18,650 someone or other guarding some herd, and I'd kill him. 753 01:20:20,340 --> 01:20:23,460 I thought that the knife would cut my victim better 754 01:20:23,530 --> 01:20:24,690 if it was sharp. 755 01:20:26,460 --> 01:20:29,650 So I went and carefully sharpened my knife. 756 01:22:06,650 --> 01:22:07,570 François? 757 01:22:08,770 --> 01:22:09,690 What? 758 01:22:12,810 --> 01:22:13,970 Do you recognize me? 759 01:22:15,770 --> 01:22:17,100 You're Jules's brother. 760 01:22:24,650 --> 01:22:25,650 I saw you at mass. 761 01:22:26,810 --> 01:22:28,020 You're an altar boy. 762 01:22:29,210 --> 01:22:30,180 Yes, what of it? 763 01:22:32,180 --> 01:22:33,420 Nothing, just asking. 764 01:22:38,210 --> 01:22:39,460 What are you doing? 765 01:22:40,100 --> 01:22:41,380 Can't you see? 766 01:22:47,340 --> 01:22:48,570 Are you going home? 767 01:22:48,650 --> 01:22:50,770 First I have to get some kindling. 768 01:22:52,770 --> 01:22:54,650 He's not as good as Blondel, 769 01:22:55,180 --> 01:22:57,570 but I'll have a better chance of grabbing him. 770 01:22:58,970 --> 01:23:00,100 Can I come with you? 771 01:23:00,650 --> 01:23:01,570 If you want. 772 01:23:09,100 --> 01:23:12,260 "Well, here's what I need," I immediately thought. 773 01:23:34,730 --> 01:23:35,890 Are you tired? 774 01:23:36,730 --> 01:23:37,650 A little. 775 01:23:41,930 --> 01:23:44,050 Let's go gather some hazelnuts. 776 01:23:44,130 --> 01:23:46,260 - Is it far? - No, just over there. 777 01:23:47,530 --> 01:23:48,850 Leave your things here. 778 01:23:51,340 --> 01:23:52,260 Come on! 779 01:24:00,380 --> 01:24:02,130 Go ahead, it's right over there. 780 01:24:26,100 --> 01:24:28,730 Let's see if you're a good mountain shepherd. 781 01:24:28,810 --> 01:24:30,100 You're crazy! That hurts! 782 01:24:36,650 --> 01:24:38,570 When the poor little boy shouted: 783 01:24:38,650 --> 01:24:41,020 "Reidal, you're crazy, you're hurting my neck," 784 01:24:42,810 --> 01:24:44,210 I hesitated for a moment. 785 01:24:47,050 --> 01:24:50,530 I was starting to realize the seriousness of what I was doing. 786 01:24:52,970 --> 01:24:54,380 I might have let go, 787 01:24:54,460 --> 01:24:58,260 but I thought I had hurt him badly and that he'd tell his mother. 788 01:26:19,930 --> 01:26:23,690 After holding the head in my hands for about ten seconds, 789 01:26:23,770 --> 01:26:26,130 I saw that this was only a cadaver. 790 01:26:28,500 --> 01:26:29,930 It disgusted me so much 791 01:26:30,020 --> 01:26:32,570 that I threw it 3 or 4 meters from the body. 792 01:26:44,970 --> 01:26:47,020 I didn't masturbate, and I thought: 793 01:26:48,610 --> 01:26:51,020 "Is this how long this pleasure lasts?" 794 01:27:41,210 --> 01:27:43,210 I tried to cry to soothe myself, 795 01:27:44,130 --> 01:27:45,300 but I couldn't. 796 01:27:56,890 --> 01:28:00,420 "Mary, refuge of sinners and the desperate..." 797 01:28:01,730 --> 01:28:04,530 After praying for a moment, I thought: 798 01:28:05,850 --> 01:28:07,770 "What does God require of you? 799 01:28:09,500 --> 01:28:10,850 "It's only natural. 800 01:28:11,810 --> 01:28:13,650 "He asks only to forgive you, 801 01:28:13,730 --> 01:28:16,530 on the condition that you sincerely repent." 802 01:29:27,730 --> 01:29:30,930 I killed François Raulhac and I'm here to give myself up. 803 01:29:35,890 --> 01:29:38,020 Major crime, the gendarmes said. 804 01:29:39,650 --> 01:29:43,460 I did not understand the meaning, the scope, the weight, 805 01:29:43,530 --> 01:29:44,570 the value of those words: 806 01:29:45,500 --> 01:29:46,420 major crime. 807 01:29:53,770 --> 01:29:56,650 You feel no remorse for what you did to François? 808 01:29:58,650 --> 01:29:59,570 François? 809 01:30:01,100 --> 01:30:03,380 He looked happy and proud. 810 01:30:04,650 --> 01:30:06,610 Besides, he didn't like me very much. 811 01:30:08,890 --> 01:30:11,890 And those are sufficient reasons to have killed him? 812 01:30:21,460 --> 01:30:22,610 Please, 813 01:30:22,690 --> 01:30:25,380 we would like to know exactly what happened yesterday. 814 01:30:31,340 --> 01:30:33,050 Well, gendarmes, 815 01:30:33,730 --> 01:30:35,890 perhaps you can show him what he did. 816 01:30:35,970 --> 01:30:38,100 Show Mr. Reidal what he did yesterday. 817 01:30:38,180 --> 01:30:39,380 Remove these sheets. 818 01:30:42,570 --> 01:30:43,500 Come closer. 819 01:30:43,850 --> 01:30:45,180 Come closer! Close. 820 01:30:49,130 --> 01:30:50,130 Take a good look. 821 01:30:56,850 --> 01:30:58,050 Don't you remember this? 822 01:31:00,610 --> 01:31:02,890 Tell us exactly what happened yesterday. 823 01:31:05,100 --> 01:31:06,380 It's so very clear. 824 01:31:07,300 --> 01:31:09,890 We see a young boy who died in terrible pain. 825 01:31:09,970 --> 01:31:12,300 How do you explain it? You monster! 826 01:31:13,890 --> 01:31:18,100 If my conscience made it my duty to feel pity for François, 827 01:31:19,050 --> 01:31:21,610 I felt rather more inclined to hate him, 828 01:31:22,530 --> 01:31:25,810 jealous that he was being pitied while I was being insulted, 829 01:31:25,890 --> 01:31:28,300 I who felt much more unfortunate than he. 830 01:31:29,300 --> 01:31:30,570 That's enough! 831 01:31:31,420 --> 01:31:34,210 Take him to the prison in Vic. I'll see him later. 832 01:31:34,300 --> 01:31:36,460 "Scoundrels!" I thought to myself, 833 01:31:37,210 --> 01:31:40,810 "is this how you should treat a child unable to resist?" 834 01:31:40,890 --> 01:31:44,180 Young François, his face was a great deal nicer than yours... 835 01:31:44,890 --> 01:31:46,770 You deserve the same thing. 836 01:31:49,530 --> 01:31:50,650 I didn't cry. 837 01:31:53,050 --> 01:31:56,530 I might have cried if anyone had shown me compassion. 838 01:31:58,650 --> 01:32:00,420 And my thoughts turned to God. 839 01:32:02,970 --> 01:32:04,810 "My God, forgive me, 840 01:32:04,890 --> 01:32:07,500 and forgive them, for they know not what they do." 841 01:32:36,890 --> 01:32:39,300 Today, December 3rd, 842 01:32:40,610 --> 01:32:41,530 it is raining. 843 01:32:43,690 --> 01:32:46,650 My thoughts are darker and above all rather vague. 844 01:32:49,530 --> 01:32:51,380 My days are sad and monotonous, 845 01:32:52,460 --> 01:32:53,930 but don't seem long to me. 846 01:32:55,810 --> 01:32:58,100 I spend my time writing my memoirs, 847 01:32:58,460 --> 01:33:00,890 reliving in thought the life I have lived. 848 01:33:33,420 --> 01:33:36,340 I think often of the minor seminary of Saint-Flour, 849 01:33:36,770 --> 01:33:38,610 which is so dear to my heart. 850 01:33:40,420 --> 01:33:43,730 I am troubled to be so far from those I love, 851 01:33:45,500 --> 01:33:46,730 from those I loved, 852 01:33:47,650 --> 01:33:49,260 from those places I loved. 853 01:33:51,930 --> 01:33:54,610 All of my happiness lies in what I no longer have, 854 01:33:55,460 --> 01:33:57,050 in what I will no longer have. 855 01:33:59,500 --> 01:34:02,100 Everything that could make me happy is over there, 856 01:34:02,770 --> 01:34:04,810 at the minor seminary of Saint-Flour. 857 01:34:07,130 --> 01:34:10,050 Do they ever think of me, those friends I mourn? 858 01:34:12,610 --> 01:34:14,340 Will I ever see them again? 859 01:34:17,530 --> 01:34:19,210 What misfortune is mine? 860 01:34:33,020 --> 01:34:35,770 For months I've been struggling and struggling 861 01:34:36,260 --> 01:34:38,530 to keep the idea from coming back. 862 01:34:41,380 --> 01:34:43,130 And with all of your questions... 863 01:34:49,210 --> 01:34:50,500 I am a coward. 864 01:34:51,500 --> 01:34:54,340 I always say I won't do it again, and then I do. 865 01:34:59,530 --> 01:35:00,570 What happened? 866 01:35:04,210 --> 01:35:06,300 I masturbated last Thursday. 867 01:35:18,460 --> 01:35:20,210 I had a dream about Blondel. 868 01:35:23,890 --> 01:35:27,210 I saw him on the boulder where we went for a walk. 869 01:35:29,210 --> 01:35:32,530 I saw myself hit him over the head with a stick. 870 01:35:33,530 --> 01:35:35,930 And then I saw him there, on the ground. 871 01:35:39,850 --> 01:35:42,180 And I had a great erection. 872 01:35:47,180 --> 01:35:48,380 Imagine, 873 01:35:50,260 --> 01:35:52,650 what a joy for me to possess Blondel. 874 01:35:54,210 --> 01:35:56,770 He whom I consider almost like a demi-God. 875 01:36:00,500 --> 01:36:03,020 At every moment Blondel is in my mind. 876 01:36:06,210 --> 01:36:09,570 I imagine myself furrowing his face with a knife. 877 01:36:15,460 --> 01:36:16,500 All day long, 878 01:36:17,100 --> 01:36:19,570 thinking about him, I want to kill him. 879 01:36:24,420 --> 01:36:26,380 I'll never be done with Blondel. 880 01:36:31,890 --> 01:36:33,210 No matter what I do, 881 01:36:34,730 --> 01:36:37,570 for me, scenes of murder are full of charm. 882 01:36:59,100 --> 01:37:01,460 Based on the report by Professor Lacassagne, 883 01:37:01,530 --> 01:37:03,970 Bruno Reidal was interned in an insane asylum. 884 01:37:05,570 --> 01:37:10,050 He entered the asylum at Aurillac on January 16th, 1907. 885 01:37:11,610 --> 01:37:16,210 He died there on September 13th, 1918 at the age of 30.